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Speaker 1: Hi, Catherine.

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Speaker 2: How's my Orca? Chelsea?

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Speaker 3: Sunny and beautiful? Everything's going very well in my Orca.

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Speaker 2: Who did you have this past week?

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Speaker 1: I have my sisters and I have about five girlfriends.

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Speaker 2: Oh that's wonderful.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's really nice. We've been having a really nice

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Speaker 3: time together. I've been training everyone physically training.

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Speaker 1: Oh oh yeah.

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Speaker 3: I'm the age of my group when Ange is not

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Speaker 3: around and is my lunatic friend for Whistler who runs

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Speaker 3: marathons in three and a half hours.

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Speaker 4: Truly, the amount of like e bike hours that we

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Speaker 4: logged when we were there, and I only did like

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Speaker 4: half of them, and I still logged play.

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Speaker 1: I know, I know.

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Speaker 3: But you know what I love about it being in

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Speaker 3: my Orca is my thighs are so firm. They are

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Speaker 3: so firm from riding my fucking bike all day long

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Speaker 3: and exercising and walking up and down to the lighthouse.

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Speaker 3: My legs almost get thicker, and I love the density

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Speaker 3: I don't want.

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Speaker 1: It's like when I ski a.

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Speaker 3: Lot, my thighs get bigger, you know, So I'm just

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Speaker 3: trying to keep my thighs big all year round for skiing.

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Speaker 2: You know what they say, thick thighs save lives.

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Speaker 1: Oh is that right? Okay, well I'm saving I've left

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Speaker 1: and right with my thick thighs.

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Speaker 4: I have been working out with a trainer and like,

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Speaker 4: all she has me to do is squats, and my

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Speaker 4: ass is like round and fantastic.

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Speaker 2: Now, oh it's so hard.

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Speaker 1: It takes two weeks to get your ass lifted.

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Speaker 3: If you want to do get your ass lifted, all

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Speaker 3: you do is but exercises for two weeks and your

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Speaker 3: ass lifts. I never had an asking my sisters don't

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Speaker 3: have asses. I am the only one who's cultivated one

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Speaker 3: because I realized you could make one out of nothing,

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Speaker 3: out of out of a pancake.

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Speaker 2: Chelsea, I have a little dipsy doodle, a dipsy doo.

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Speaker 4: So this is somebody who wrote in after our Jane

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Speaker 4: Fonda episode. We had that email from Jen who had

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Speaker 4: been a sex worker and was having trouble dating. And

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Speaker 4: this is from Jill, who was also a sex worker.

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Speaker 4: She says to your Chelsea, I'm a former stripper who

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Speaker 4: met my husband in the strip club twenty years ago,

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Speaker 4: and yes we're still together. I know two other women

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Speaker 4: who met their husband and strip clubs and are still

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Speaker 4: together because their relationships morphed over time. They picked people

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Speaker 4: who could quote see who they were. I don't think

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Speaker 4: these men are all that rare, because I've been out

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Speaker 4: as a stripper throughout my and have had relationships with

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Speaker 4: men who respect me all my life, in work and

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Speaker 4: in friendship.

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Speaker 2: Was it easy meeting a partner.

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Speaker 4: No, But if you carry yourself with confidence and self assuredness,

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Speaker 4: people will see that you demand respect. If anyone says

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Speaker 4: anything out of line, read them. We all develop that

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Speaker 4: skill on the job. Finding a good partner, in general

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Speaker 4: is difficult. What are the key characteristics you want to

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Speaker 4: find in a partner? Put those first. Don't be ashamed

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Speaker 4: of your past, wear it like a badge of honor.

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Speaker 4: Good you are resilient and amazing and have done it

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Speaker 4: and then started your own business. I went on to

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Speaker 4: make documentaries, write plays, screenplays, win awards doing that, and

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Speaker 4: then became a boxer twenty fifteen National Golden Gloves Champion.

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Speaker 4: My husband accepts and loves all those versions of me.

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Speaker 4: You can find that too.

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Speaker 5: Love it side.

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Speaker 3: What a positive, optimistic note, fantastic.

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Speaker 1: We have such fucking great listeners. That's awesome, and.

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Speaker 4: It's great because if someone out there has had this

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Speaker 4: very specific experience. There's somebody else out there who knows

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Speaker 4: exactly how they feel. But anyway, should we get to

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Speaker 4: today's a guest.

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Speaker 3: Our guest today is a hilarious comedian who who's on

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Speaker 3: tour right now and her new special Big Guy, debut

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Speaker 3: in the top ten of Netflix, now streaming on Netflix.

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Speaker 1: Please welcome Rachel Feinstein.

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Speaker 3: Rachel, how excited are we that we're going to get

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Speaker 3: to tour together?

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Speaker 1: I know, I'm so excited to be in Hawaii. We're

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Speaker 1: going to Hawaii together in July. Right, we're going to July.

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Speaker 1: We're going to Honolulu and Maui.

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Speaker 6: I can't wait for some Hawaii whoring. I know it's

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Speaker 6: going to be amazing.

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Speaker 3: I love I love to get my groove on in

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Speaker 3: Hawaii because it's filled with my type of men.

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Speaker 1: What's that.

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Speaker 3: Large samoan, large samoan looking men. That's my type, hefty samoan.

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Speaker 1: I had no idea.

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Speaker 3: I like elderly men and large samoan type builds. I

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Speaker 3: like that build for a friend or for a lover.

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Speaker 3: I like a corpulent figure, you know what I mean?

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Speaker 1: Like I like while you're worth it.

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Speaker 3: Thank you First, I want to congratulate you on your

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Speaker 3: new special A Big Guy, which was just recently premiered

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Speaker 3: on Netflix where everybody can stream it. Congratulations, Are you

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Speaker 3: happy with your special? Did you love it?

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Speaker 6: It was hard to watch myself, but now the worst. Yeah,

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Speaker 6: it's hard.

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Speaker 1: When I was.

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Speaker 6: Editing it, I was just like, shut up, what if

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Speaker 6: I ever needed to say? I kept screaming at myself

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Speaker 6: and calling myself a pig. And I screamed that so

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Speaker 6: much that I asked one of the producers if I

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Speaker 6: could call the special America's Favorite Pig, and they said no,

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Speaker 6: But I still think it would be a fun, loving

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Speaker 6: name for a show.

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Speaker 3: It would America's Favorite Pig is great, and I think

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Speaker 3: you could have called it that. But I thank you, Shelsea. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: why would Why would anyone stop that?

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Speaker 1: That's up to you.

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Speaker 3: It's like saying, I want to name my book America's

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Speaker 3: Favorite Pig. What is they going to say? Like, No,

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Speaker 3: that's not going to be popular maybe, but go for it.

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Speaker 1: I had to watch.

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Speaker 3: I was listening to a set of mine the other

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Speaker 3: night because I did a bunch of new stuff, and

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Speaker 3: I was like, oh, can you guys give me you know,

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Speaker 3: the recording of that, and I was listening to it

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Speaker 3: to it for less than two minutes before I was like,

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Speaker 3: who fucking cares what I said. I cannot listen to

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Speaker 3: this bitch for one more second. I want to close

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Speaker 3: myself like a box when I listen. I'm like, what

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Speaker 3: if you ever needed to get out there? Especially when

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Speaker 3: I really use the stage and just kind of like

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Speaker 3: saunter around.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I do that all the time. I saunter. I

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Speaker 1: think it's better to use the stage.

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Speaker 5: You know.

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Speaker 3: Zach Alifanakis once said to me, you have to use

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Speaker 3: the stage as a comedian. And before he said that,

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Speaker 3: I didn't walk around on stage, and I was like,

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Speaker 3: what does he mean by that? And then I started

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Speaker 3: walking around on stage. I'm like, I think this is

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Speaker 3: more dynamic than just standing there like yeah, I don't

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Speaker 3: want to just stand somewhere like you are talking. You

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Speaker 3: would normally be moving around.

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Speaker 6: So these are profound, core self esteem issues that I

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Speaker 6: have and nothing else.

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Speaker 3: What other self esteem issues do you want to work on?

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Speaker 3: Let's get to it because I can help. What kind

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Speaker 3: of bathing suit equipment do you think you'll be bringing

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Speaker 3: to Hawaii?

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Speaker 1: Rachel? When you mentioned on Instagram that I should wear

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Speaker 1: a thong. I was like, no one needs that. I

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Speaker 1: don't think I look good in the thong.

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Speaker 3: No one should be wearing a thong. First of all,

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Speaker 3: thongs are so disgusting. I don't even want to wear

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Speaker 3: them myself. I don't even want to wear them as

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Speaker 3: underwear anymore. It's too many, it's too problematic. There are

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Speaker 3: too many things, like I have to phase out into

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Speaker 3: a full panty. The problem with a full panty, though,

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Speaker 3: is that when you wear very tight jeans, it flattens

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Speaker 3: my ass. And I don't have a bulbous ass, so

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Speaker 3: I need all the lift I can get. When I

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Speaker 3: wear a full panty, it does a mush you know, yes.

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Speaker 1: Me too.

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Speaker 6: There's a sadness to a full panty. It smushes me.

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Speaker 6: But a thong, no one needs that. I'd send somebody

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Speaker 6: into a low grade depression. There's a real supply and demand.

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Speaker 6: Is shoe with my dumb ass and its long?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, there's not really.

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Speaker 3: I mean, I don't really think that I've ever seen

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Speaker 3: a thong and thought that looks good.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, it's hypothetically good, yeah, but no, yeah, I need

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Speaker 6: like unless I'm like Paris filtered like Triple Paris filtered nobody,

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Speaker 6: no one needs that at all. But I'm excited for Hawaii,

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Speaker 6: Like that's something I need right now. Like I've been well,

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Speaker 6: you've been hustling. Yeah, yeah, I've been hurling my body

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Speaker 6: to every dumb place on the road, and I'm like, yeah,

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Speaker 6: I need to lay still on a beach right right.

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Speaker 3: Well, I know that your Special debut in the top ten,

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Speaker 3: so that's very exciting, which means people are loving it.

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Speaker 6: That was cool, And your DMS this in the last year,

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Speaker 6: You're sending me a couple of messages about some dumb video.

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Speaker 6: I like made my day, And I can't explain to

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Speaker 6: you how much because you know, I mean, I've been

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Speaker 6: doing stand up for what feels like seventy years, so

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Speaker 6: I really feel like I'm just in the winter of

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Speaker 6: my life right now. So the fact that I'm like,

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Speaker 6: oh my god, okay, people watch it, I was just

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Speaker 6: like didn't want it to get buried. So it felt

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Speaker 6: really cool that like people are actually watching it now,

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Speaker 6: and I'm like, I just want to start writing Uber

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Speaker 6: blacks at least, you know, that's kind of my goal

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Speaker 6: with this.

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Speaker 1: Like it's been I did everything the.

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Speaker 6: Long way, Like, I've been a road woman for a

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Speaker 6: lot of years, so like I need this.

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Speaker 1: Did you sleep with a lot of comics on the road?

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Speaker 6: Just so much head Chelsea, There wasn't a moment I

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Speaker 6: wasn't on my so much dick sucking.

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Speaker 7: I know.

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Speaker 3: That's where dick sucking really comes into its own. It's

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Speaker 3: on the road.

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Speaker 6: My whole family too. Yeah, just generations of Feinstein's just

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Speaker 6: it's just really getting passed around just so that I

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Speaker 6: can get this out.

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Speaker 1: Generations of dick sucking.

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Speaker 6: Wow, that's amazing, A long line of godless horse. My

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Speaker 6: grandmother said when I was a very small girl, I

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Speaker 6: never met a dick that I wasn't fond of, not one,

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Speaker 6: not one dick.

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Speaker 1: No, I don't know.

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Speaker 6: I didn't have I wasn't good at any aspect of

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Speaker 6: the business. There's no business left and silly to even

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Speaker 6: say that, but whatever it was, I wasn't good at it.

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Speaker 1: I was just on the road forever.

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Speaker 6: So like it feels, I'm just hoping this helps and

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Speaker 6: it like can can move some tickets for me changed

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Speaker 6: my life a little bit.

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Speaker 1: Right absolutely. Let's how how long have you been doing

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Speaker 1: stand up? Really? Like twenty four five? Twenty five years.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, I moved to New York when I was like

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Speaker 6: seventeen with this guy and his bands called Dick's sister.

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Speaker 6: And then I Dick's sister dumped me, and I stayed

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Speaker 6: in New York and he kind of like undumped me

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Speaker 6: and redumped me a few times, like I wasn't really

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Speaker 6: taking the dump, and I would try to kind of

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Speaker 6: hang near his house in Staten Island where he lived

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Speaker 6: with the rest of his band. And then I just

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Speaker 6: stayed here and started doing open mics and stuff and

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Speaker 6: getting fired from different jobs first, and I felt like

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Speaker 6: at best I was gonna be like homelessh if I

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Speaker 6: didn't do this, you know, like there wasn't I wish

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Speaker 6: I could have been one of those people that was

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Speaker 6: like about to be a doctor. But I made this

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Speaker 6: like noble choice to leave it all for the arts.

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Speaker 6: But this was it, Like I was failed wildly in school.

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Speaker 3: So yeah, and your husband's a fireman, which you talk

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Speaker 3: about in the special.

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Speaker 1: So he's an American hero.

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Speaker 5: He is.

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Speaker 6: He's a technical hero, but he infuriates me like he's

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Speaker 6: an emotional desert but a fun loving guy, a good

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Speaker 6: hang for sure. Yeah, firemen are great like for you

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Speaker 6: could say anything to them. That's that's what works. He's

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Speaker 6: my husband's almost like an accidental feminist, Like he he doesn't.

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Speaker 1: Care what I do.

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Speaker 6: I could I could be out doing whatever with stand out,

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Speaker 6: like I could spend the night at some comics house,

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Speaker 6: get passed around. No, but just really like just some

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Speaker 6: platonic guy that doesn't even see me as a woman.

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Speaker 6: But Pete wouldn't question that. He's just kind of like

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Speaker 6: you're on your own. But if I ever explained what

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Speaker 6: a feminist was to him, he probably thinks they're like

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Speaker 6: Nazis or something like they run a little dumb in

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Speaker 6: that way. But strangely enough, it took a fireman because

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Speaker 6: every other guy like they got a kick out of

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Speaker 6: what I did for like you know, like a week,

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Speaker 6: and then they were like forget this, like she's working

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Speaker 6: on Christmas or and Pete is working on Christmas. So

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Speaker 6: it's kind of like he gets the life. And they

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Speaker 6: have their thing and in a weird way like firefighting,

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Speaker 6: Like they have a kitchen table where they hang and

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Speaker 6: when you walk in as a regular person, you can

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Speaker 6: feel the chemicals in the room change and it feels like,

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Speaker 6: you know, like at the cellar when a normal person

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Speaker 6: we call them civilians, which is hilarious, but like when

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Speaker 6: a normal person walks into the room, like you can

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Speaker 6: feel that whole energy change in the room. Like ah,

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Speaker 6: like somebody will a comic said this recently. They're like, oh,

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Speaker 6: he brought his like civilian girlfriend and she had to

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Speaker 6: sit at the table. But it's kind of similar, like

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Speaker 6: and he has that weird world that we have, so

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Speaker 6: there's not really any envy there. And comics and firemen

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Speaker 6: like they don't want anything the other one has. So

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Speaker 6: he's a pretty good hang with comics. He doesn't try

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Speaker 6: to be funny, like he's a good laugher, you know,

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Speaker 6: he doesn't step on anything they're trying to do, So

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Speaker 6: it strangely like works.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, what about your child? How long have you had

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Speaker 1: your child?

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Speaker 5: Oh?

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Speaker 1: My god, where is she?

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Speaker 6: She is four years old. I have a little kid,

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Speaker 6: So you've had her for four years? Is that kind

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Speaker 6: of for four years?

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Speaker 1: That is cool?

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Speaker 3: How how is motherhood going for you as a comedian,

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Speaker 3: as a working woman, late night working woman, it's hard.

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Speaker 6: I feel like I'm not pulling anything off completely, But

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Speaker 6: I have a lot of female comic friends and I

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Speaker 6: still relate to comedians more than like regular moms, you know.

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Speaker 6: So like I'm on like a chat with Rosebud and

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Speaker 6: Whitney and other other comic moms that kind of like

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Speaker 6: help each other with weird tips on how to do it.

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Speaker 1: Michelle Wolf has a kid.

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Speaker 6: I was just talking with her at the Seller last night,

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Speaker 6: so that helps me try to like figure it all out.

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Speaker 1: I'm not in any way pulling it off.

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Speaker 6: Like just before we got on this zoom, I bribed

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Speaker 6: my daughter with like a series of things. There was

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Speaker 6: just so that she wouldn't walk in this room, like

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Speaker 6: there was a bribe, and then there's like a threat

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Speaker 6: of a bribe.

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Speaker 1: To being taken away.

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Speaker 6: I'm like, I'll give you this, and if you walk

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Speaker 6: in here, I'll take this away, which I call it thrive.

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Speaker 6: So there's like a series of like hard negotiations that

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Speaker 6: went on before I brought that random teenager in here

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Speaker 6: to do the audio. So I'm not pulling anything off,

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Speaker 6: but I feel like she kind of at this point

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Speaker 6: she's not I'm not a scheduled person. She's grown up,

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Speaker 6: half in a firehouse, like half on the road with me,

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Speaker 6: so like she's kind of not she's not expecting that,

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Speaker 6: like she knows.

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Speaker 1: She looks at me like she can tell I'm not

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Speaker 1: in charge of anything. Yeah, that's how I felt growing up.

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Speaker 3: I knew my parents had no say Like I was like,

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Speaker 3: this is you guys are not making decisions around here,

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Speaker 3: Like I'll come in hot and take over.

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Speaker 1: I think it's good to know.

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Speaker 3: I mean because first of all, nothing bad comes from

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Speaker 3: a girl, especially that grows up a little faster.

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Speaker 1: I think that's always yields good results. Yeah, you know what,

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Speaker 1: I agree with you. Yeah, shake it out.

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Speaker 3: You shake out your naughtiness when you're younger, and then

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Speaker 3: by the time you're like in your twenties.

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Speaker 6: You're overall that well maybe thirty. I completely agree with

323
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Speaker 6: you because I was a really bad kid. I did

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Speaker 6: acid when I was like thirteen, like every week again,

325
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Speaker 6: I had like an appointment to do acid with like

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Speaker 6: six of my friends.

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Speaker 1: And I mean we were just deep pigs.

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Speaker 6: We would go up on like some sign in this

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Speaker 6: neighborhood and just moon people in the area. We're like, oh,

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Speaker 6: we're mooning now, Like we had our asses out all

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Speaker 6: the time.

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Speaker 1: We were always doing drugs.

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Speaker 6: And then by the time I was like seventeen, and

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Speaker 6: moved to New York with dumb Dick's sister. I was like, yeah,

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Speaker 6: I'd done all the kind of ridiculousness I'd gotten out

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Speaker 6: of my system, and I was able to like focus

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Speaker 6: a little more on like stand up. I do think

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Speaker 6: it's those kids that like really run a tight ship

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Speaker 6: in high school then they start their real problematic horring

340
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Speaker 6: later on or drug use or whatever.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I agree with that. Better to get the horror

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Speaker 3: out soon, early, early, getting rid of the horror early

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Speaker 3: so that you can really start to thrive in your

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Speaker 3: twenties and thirties.

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Speaker 1: For sure.

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Speaker 6: Yes, I was definitely like a I was a problem.

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Speaker 6: I know somebody that knows you. He said you were

348
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Speaker 6: very cool. He grew up in Jersey near you. He

349
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Speaker 6: said you were always cool and could kind of like

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Speaker 6: hang from young, Like you seemed like a comic at

351
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Speaker 6: the table very young. Were you like hanging with a

352
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Speaker 6: group of guys or like what was your high school situation?

353
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Speaker 1: Who knows?

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Speaker 3: I mean, I in my mind, I was in high

355
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Speaker 3: school when I was born, Like I was trapped in

356
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Speaker 3: a baby's body and I felt like a woman the

357
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Speaker 3: minute I was born, and all I wanted to do was.

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Speaker 1: Woman, be a woman. I was like, when can I

359
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Speaker 1: get be a woman?

360
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Speaker 3: Like? That was my favorite line to say, Like soon

361
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Speaker 3: I'll be a woman and you won't be able to

362
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Speaker 3: tell me.

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Speaker 1: What to do. I know what you mean, because, like

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Speaker 1: I love.

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Speaker 6: I used to love the show when I was a

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Speaker 6: little kid called Moonlighting because I loved office tension. I

367
00:14:26,920 --> 00:14:28,040
Speaker 6: was like, I want to grow up one day and

368
00:14:28,080 --> 00:14:31,200
Speaker 6: have sexual tension in office. Those were my goals, if

369
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Speaker 6: totally totally.

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Speaker 1: First of all, working in an office.

371
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Speaker 3: When you were watching Moonlighting, working in an office seemed sexy.

372
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Speaker 3: You were like, Oh, that's that's sexy, like an office

373
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Speaker 3: job with these skirts. I'll wear skirts and heels and

374
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Speaker 3: then I'll fuck my colleague.

375
00:14:46,520 --> 00:14:51,080
Speaker 1: Like it was so fun, right, so fun. Yeah, I

376
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Speaker 1: played this game.

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Speaker 6: I talked about it in like my first half hour

378
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Speaker 6: many years ago. But I used to play this game

379
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Speaker 6: with my Catholic friend. I wanted to be Catholic so bad.

380
00:14:57,440 --> 00:14:59,280
Speaker 6: I just wanted one of those names that like oh

381
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Speaker 6: rachel O, f Einstein or some shit.

382
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Speaker 1: And we would play this.

383
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Speaker 6: Game where she would throw me on the bed and

384
00:15:04,120 --> 00:15:06,280
Speaker 6: we worked in office. Her name is Harry Company, she

385
00:15:06,400 --> 00:15:08,600
Speaker 6: was the boss, and we would play this game in

386
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Speaker 6: her dad's office, like he had no idea where were

387
00:15:10,400 --> 00:15:13,400
Speaker 6: playing this weird horring game in his office. And she

388
00:15:13,400 --> 00:15:16,480
Speaker 6: would go like, Chrissy, get me my brief that I'd

389
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Speaker 6: be like, I'm doing the best I can, mister company.

390
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Speaker 6: My kids just get confused. I think that was all

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Speaker 6: for Moonlighting. It was very much like a porn Yeah.

392
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Speaker 3: I know porn's were not dissimilar to those programs. I

393
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Speaker 3: guess maybe because it was set in the same timeframe.

394
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Speaker 3: But there is a lot of porn represented, like foreign

395
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Speaker 3: like Vibes, and it shows like Moonlighting and what was

396
00:15:36,680 --> 00:15:40,920
Speaker 3: that other h not Dallas and Santa Barbara and Barbara

397
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Speaker 3: was awesome.

398
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Speaker 1: That was a soap opera though. That was the day. Yeah.

399
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Speaker 3: I once tried to call Kelly Capwell directly because I

400
00:15:47,080 --> 00:15:49,560
Speaker 3: was so obsessed with Robin Wright that I looked up

401
00:15:49,600 --> 00:15:51,680
Speaker 3: Kelly Capwell. I was so young, I didn't understand that

402
00:15:51,720 --> 00:15:53,880
Speaker 3: was a character's name, and I looked her up in

403
00:15:53,880 --> 00:15:56,120
Speaker 3: the phone book in Santa Barbara and called someone named

404
00:15:56,160 --> 00:15:56,920
Speaker 3: Kelly Capwell.

405
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Speaker 1: I was obsessed with that bitch.

406
00:16:00,320 --> 00:16:04,480
Speaker 3: Gorgeous, the most beautiful family of all time.

407
00:16:04,800 --> 00:16:07,800
Speaker 6: The actress's name is Marcy Walker. I was completely and

408
00:16:07,880 --> 00:16:10,400
Speaker 6: utterly obsessed with her. I would just like hump a

409
00:16:10,480 --> 00:16:13,840
Speaker 6: pillow and pretend it was cruise that like hot Latin cop. Also,

410
00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:16,160
Speaker 6: they were sending so many weird messages with that show

411
00:16:16,200 --> 00:16:18,720
Speaker 6: because something happened to her, like she was like assaulted

412
00:16:18,800 --> 00:16:20,360
Speaker 6: or something, and then she was always on this bed

413
00:16:20,400 --> 00:16:24,280
Speaker 6: getting extra attention from men at post assault, Like I.

414
00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:26,560
Speaker 1: Didn't know what that was. She was like trying.

415
00:16:26,600 --> 00:16:30,040
Speaker 3: She had like a concussion for like nine weeks or whatever,

416
00:16:30,160 --> 00:16:32,960
Speaker 3: like ninety weeks soapapera the that time where you know

417
00:16:33,000 --> 00:16:35,640
Speaker 3: you've been kidnapped three times in between that time. But

418
00:16:35,760 --> 00:16:38,480
Speaker 3: she was like lying in bed every episode so she

419
00:16:38,520 --> 00:16:40,960
Speaker 3: could go just basically to set her up for more

420
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Speaker 3: sexual assaults. And we're tuning in like we can't wait

421
00:16:44,320 --> 00:16:46,880
Speaker 3: to see it. We're like, when when's it gonna happen next?

422
00:16:47,280 --> 00:16:49,720
Speaker 6: She was so sick, and she was always kind of

423
00:16:49,720 --> 00:16:52,080
Speaker 6: dewey and hot and just everything. I wasn't just like

424
00:16:52,520 --> 00:16:56,080
Speaker 6: blonde and fucking like straight silky blonde. I wanted to

425
00:16:56,120 --> 00:16:58,240
Speaker 6: be her, And she was always laying on that bed

426
00:16:58,400 --> 00:17:00,360
Speaker 6: and then this hot cop would just keep coming back

427
00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:01,160
Speaker 6: and tending to her.

428
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Speaker 1: I'm like this is the life I want. I'm ordering

429
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Speaker 1: this life.

430
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Speaker 6: I want to lay on some kind of bed and

431
00:17:05,960 --> 00:17:08,600
Speaker 6: snack on it and just have somebody avenging something on

432
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Speaker 6: my behalf and.

433
00:17:09,440 --> 00:17:12,040
Speaker 1: Have your husband avenge of fire. Why can't he amage

434
00:17:12,119 --> 00:17:12,600
Speaker 1: my husband?

435
00:17:12,920 --> 00:17:14,639
Speaker 6: You don't want to go missing for weeks before he

436
00:17:14,680 --> 00:17:16,600
Speaker 6: would look for me. It's like he's not jealous to

437
00:17:16,800 --> 00:17:19,720
Speaker 6: like such a problematic point. I've tried to make him jealous,

438
00:17:19,720 --> 00:17:21,959
Speaker 6: and he's like, yeah, he could give a shit, like

439
00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:24,080
Speaker 6: it would be somebody could make a suit out of

440
00:17:24,080 --> 00:17:26,320
Speaker 6: my skin and he wouldn't follow up. He's very anal

441
00:17:26,359 --> 00:17:28,199
Speaker 6: neat about like how stuff Like I feel like if

442
00:17:28,240 --> 00:17:30,560
Speaker 6: I was missing, he'd be emptying the dishwasher first, like

443
00:17:30,560 --> 00:17:32,080
Speaker 6: he'd finished emptying the dishwasher.

444
00:17:32,400 --> 00:17:32,600
Speaker 1: Yeah.

445
00:17:32,640 --> 00:17:35,080
Speaker 3: He CA's non plussed by everything. That's the word for it,

446
00:17:35,160 --> 00:17:38,960
Speaker 3: nonplussed when you have no reaction, although it also says

447
00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:42,040
Speaker 3: it's also the opposite of having no reaction. It's having

448
00:17:42,040 --> 00:17:44,359
Speaker 3: no reaction and having the opposite of no reaction. I'm like,

449
00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:47,240
Speaker 3: isn't that two different artists antonyms?

450
00:17:47,760 --> 00:17:49,439
Speaker 1: What the fuck are you talking about?

451
00:17:49,720 --> 00:17:51,200
Speaker 3: That's what I do though, in my spare time, I

452
00:17:51,200 --> 00:17:53,800
Speaker 3: look words up in the dictionary to understand why I

453
00:17:53,840 --> 00:17:55,440
Speaker 3: can't speak clearly or correctly.

454
00:17:56,280 --> 00:17:57,560
Speaker 1: On that note, we're going to take a break and

455
00:17:57,600 --> 00:18:01,920
Speaker 1: we'll be right back this week.

456
00:18:01,960 --> 00:18:04,000
Speaker 2: We'd love to hear about your conundrums with parents.

457
00:18:04,240 --> 00:18:06,600
Speaker 4: If there's something you're working through with a parent or

458
00:18:06,880 --> 00:18:10,159
Speaker 4: need some help navigating a relationship issue, right into Dear

459
00:18:10,240 --> 00:18:12,680
Speaker 4: Chelsea podcast at gmail dot com.

460
00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:16,119
Speaker 3: And we're back with Rachel Feinstein, whose new special is

461
00:18:16,119 --> 00:18:20,560
Speaker 3: called Big Guy, Big Guy. Ask my husband's nickname for you. Yeah,

462
00:18:20,640 --> 00:18:23,080
Speaker 3: he calls you big guy. Your husband calls you big guy.

463
00:18:23,200 --> 00:18:25,560
Speaker 1: He does. Would you consider yourself the man of the house?

464
00:18:25,960 --> 00:18:27,960
Speaker 6: No, but I think he might. I mean, he just

465
00:18:27,960 --> 00:18:30,240
Speaker 6: doesn't know how to compliment a woman. He's like just

466
00:18:30,280 --> 00:18:33,520
Speaker 6: worthless romantically. He gave me, Chelsea, I'm not making this up,

467
00:18:33,600 --> 00:18:36,879
Speaker 6: a fifty dollars Amazon gift card for my birth like

468
00:18:36,920 --> 00:18:38,800
Speaker 6: fifty bucks. And you know, there was a moment where

469
00:18:38,840 --> 00:18:40,280
Speaker 6: he was like seventy five and then he was.

470
00:18:40,240 --> 00:18:42,880
Speaker 1: Like, nah, fifty not for her. Fifty feels right.

471
00:18:43,040 --> 00:18:45,160
Speaker 3: My driver once told me it was her birthday. I said,

472
00:18:45,200 --> 00:18:47,560
Speaker 3: what did you get Carolyn? He said, I'm just going

473
00:18:47,640 --> 00:18:50,960
Speaker 3: to give her some cash chill. I was like, no, no, no,

474
00:18:51,119 --> 00:18:58,119
Speaker 3: you're not, you fucking idiot. Yeah, his wife Cash, I

475
00:18:58,240 --> 00:19:00,800
Speaker 3: was like, Billy, pull over, we need to talk.

476
00:19:00,920 --> 00:19:02,360
Speaker 1: I'm like, you're an idiot.

477
00:19:03,240 --> 00:19:05,920
Speaker 6: Nothing makes me more delighted than when you trash men

478
00:19:05,960 --> 00:19:08,760
Speaker 6: for their nonsense. It's like my specific brand of what

479
00:19:08,840 --> 00:19:10,320
Speaker 6: delights me more than anything else.

480
00:19:10,640 --> 00:19:11,680
Speaker 1: When you call men to.

481
00:19:11,720 --> 00:19:14,679
Speaker 6: Task on their utter horseshit, it makes me so happy.

482
00:19:14,840 --> 00:19:17,640
Speaker 6: Cash is somehow worse than Amazon gift card. It's worse.

483
00:19:17,680 --> 00:19:18,200
Speaker 6: It's dumber.

484
00:19:18,320 --> 00:19:22,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like, do I work for you? Understand? Is

485
00:19:22,320 --> 00:19:24,320
Speaker 1: that a tip? What is that?

486
00:19:24,600 --> 00:19:27,159
Speaker 6: The thing is that he lives with men at a

487
00:19:27,200 --> 00:19:29,760
Speaker 6: house for half his fucking life. Like he doesn't come

488
00:19:29,760 --> 00:19:32,119
Speaker 6: back smarter from this house he lives at. It's so

489
00:19:32,400 --> 00:19:35,760
Speaker 6: not hot. Men are so good at being not hot,

490
00:19:35,960 --> 00:19:38,000
Speaker 6: you know what I mean. It's like, that's not hot.

491
00:19:38,080 --> 00:19:40,439
Speaker 6: Do I need to explain to you that that's not hot?

492
00:19:40,760 --> 00:19:42,600
Speaker 1: Okay? What do we have? What do we have in

493
00:19:42,600 --> 00:19:43,560
Speaker 1: store for us? Catherine?

494
00:19:43,640 --> 00:19:43,840
Speaker 6: Oh?

495
00:19:44,240 --> 00:19:45,200
Speaker 2: So many things.

496
00:19:45,280 --> 00:19:45,520
Speaker 7: Well.

497
00:19:45,560 --> 00:19:49,040
Speaker 4: Our first email comes from Richie. Richie says, Dear Chelsea,

498
00:19:49,600 --> 00:19:51,560
Speaker 4: I'm not sure whether or not I should be upset

499
00:19:51,600 --> 00:19:54,359
Speaker 4: with my partner. We've been together for over three years

500
00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:57,199
Speaker 4: and currently have a house together and two dogs. Our

501
00:19:57,240 --> 00:19:59,280
Speaker 4: lives are very intertwined, and while I love him and.

502
00:19:59,280 --> 00:20:03,840
Speaker 1: Care very why could you fucking live together? This is

503
00:20:03,880 --> 00:20:04,800
Speaker 1: a weird thing to mention.

504
00:20:04,840 --> 00:20:08,600
Speaker 4: You're right, clearly, we spent a lot of time together,

505
00:20:09,119 --> 00:20:12,360
Speaker 4: but some things from our past have come up recently.

506
00:20:12,400 --> 00:20:14,560
Speaker 4: While chatting with a mutual friend, I learned that in

507
00:20:14,600 --> 00:20:16,840
Speaker 4: our first year of dating, he didn't take us very

508
00:20:16,880 --> 00:20:20,320
Speaker 4: seriously and was constantly hitting on and flirting with other people.

509
00:20:21,080 --> 00:20:23,280
Speaker 4: I would like to believe he isn't anymore, especially since

510
00:20:23,280 --> 00:20:25,040
Speaker 4: he's been honest about how he was in the first

511
00:20:25,119 --> 00:20:27,639
Speaker 4: year of dating. But since I'm just finding out about it,

512
00:20:27,720 --> 00:20:31,359
Speaker 4: I'm feeling betrayed and honestly pissed. But we're a couple

513
00:20:31,600 --> 00:20:34,320
Speaker 4: literally a couple of years removed from this. So do

514
00:20:34,359 --> 00:20:35,960
Speaker 4: I have a right to be upset about it? Do

515
00:20:36,040 --> 00:20:37,480
Speaker 4: I need to just move on and accept?

516
00:20:37,720 --> 00:20:40,800
Speaker 1: I like this question. That is interesting. Question is interesting

517
00:20:40,800 --> 00:20:41,960
Speaker 1: because that would piss me off.

518
00:20:42,119 --> 00:20:45,320
Speaker 3: Retroactively finding out that something happened when miss me.

519
00:20:45,440 --> 00:20:48,080
Speaker 1: That's just that's just the kind of recipe that would

520
00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:48,439
Speaker 1: piss me.

521
00:20:49,440 --> 00:20:51,840
Speaker 6: Also, I also feel like admitting to something and admitting

522
00:20:51,840 --> 00:20:54,359
Speaker 6: to just a little bit of what you actually did.

523
00:20:55,080 --> 00:20:57,240
Speaker 6: That is like one tried and true tactic of a

524
00:20:57,280 --> 00:21:00,359
Speaker 6: lifelong liar, Like I've been wildly cheated on, just like

525
00:21:00,400 --> 00:21:04,080
Speaker 6: an insane, unimaginable shit that I was like, wait a second,

526
00:21:04,160 --> 00:21:06,639
Speaker 6: I would ask this question to her, is he jealous?

527
00:21:06,680 --> 00:21:09,080
Speaker 6: Because I do feel like the most jealous guys are

528
00:21:09,119 --> 00:21:11,720
Speaker 6: often cheating. And the guy that I remember, I've dated

529
00:21:11,720 --> 00:21:14,600
Speaker 6: a guy that was always always in my internet history.

530
00:21:15,160 --> 00:21:17,520
Speaker 6: Every time I would go away, he would accuse me

531
00:21:17,520 --> 00:21:19,359
Speaker 6: of all manner of things, and you know, like as

532
00:21:19,440 --> 00:21:21,280
Speaker 6: a comic on the road, I'm doing nothing but just

533
00:21:21,440 --> 00:21:24,440
Speaker 6: laying still with throbbing loneliness after my shows, like I'm

534
00:21:24,480 --> 00:21:26,840
Speaker 6: just laying in bed as alone as I've ever been

535
00:21:26,880 --> 00:21:29,480
Speaker 6: in Des Moines. And he was inside of someone. Every

536
00:21:29,480 --> 00:21:30,840
Speaker 6: time I was out of town, Like I got an

537
00:21:30,880 --> 00:21:32,960
Speaker 6: email with the dates of the other other girl he

538
00:21:33,040 --> 00:21:35,240
Speaker 6: was fucking. She's like I was with them from two

539
00:21:35,320 --> 00:21:40,280
Speaker 6: twelve to two fourteen email. Yeah, yeah, And he was

540
00:21:40,400 --> 00:21:42,640
Speaker 6: very jealous and whenever I would come home, he would

541
00:21:42,640 --> 00:21:45,960
Speaker 6: accuse me of all kinds of insane things. I remember

542
00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:49,040
Speaker 6: he used to chase me around the apartment with my laptop.

543
00:21:49,080 --> 00:21:51,200
Speaker 6: I would try to pull it back from him. And

544
00:21:51,240 --> 00:21:53,600
Speaker 6: he would make these wild like noises. He'd be like,

545
00:21:53,960 --> 00:22:03,959
Speaker 6: how like these Howard d criest chill, But my lap's

546
00:22:04,040 --> 00:22:06,960
Speaker 6: up in the freezer. For some reason, I was used

547
00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:08,639
Speaker 6: to this too, Like I was like, Oh, he's probably

548
00:22:08,640 --> 00:22:10,440
Speaker 6: gonna make a left here dad to the freezer.

549
00:22:10,840 --> 00:22:12,399
Speaker 1: And he was always kind of jogging over there.

550
00:22:12,440 --> 00:22:15,439
Speaker 6: I was like, I didn't suck a stick stick and

551
00:22:15,480 --> 00:22:17,400
Speaker 6: that he was putting the laptop in the freezer, and

552
00:22:17,480 --> 00:22:19,920
Speaker 6: you know, it was jis constant. He was always accusing

553
00:22:19,960 --> 00:22:22,479
Speaker 6: me of some insanity and he was doing it. So

554
00:22:22,520 --> 00:22:24,399
Speaker 6: my only I have no idea if this guy is

555
00:22:24,760 --> 00:22:27,119
Speaker 6: still cheating or not, or what he's up to, but

556
00:22:27,160 --> 00:22:28,879
Speaker 6: I do feel like it's one of the signs. Is

557
00:22:29,200 --> 00:22:32,720
Speaker 6: he extremely jealous and suspicious of you? And if he isn't,

558
00:22:32,720 --> 00:22:34,680
Speaker 6: I feel like there's less likely it's less likely that

559
00:22:34,800 --> 00:22:35,399
Speaker 6: he's cheating.

560
00:22:35,960 --> 00:22:38,479
Speaker 1: Yeah, what are they asking? Do they have a right

561
00:22:38,520 --> 00:22:38,880
Speaker 1: to be mad?

562
00:22:38,960 --> 00:22:39,120
Speaker 8: Yeah?

563
00:22:39,119 --> 00:22:41,119
Speaker 1: I will, I do. I think you can kind of

564
00:22:41,160 --> 00:22:41,560
Speaker 1: be mad.

565
00:22:41,840 --> 00:22:43,280
Speaker 3: A year is a long time to be hitting on

566
00:22:43,359 --> 00:22:46,399
Speaker 3: other people while you're like supposedly in a relationship, or

567
00:22:46,400 --> 00:22:47,919
Speaker 3: maybe they weren't in a relationship.

568
00:22:47,960 --> 00:22:48,399
Speaker 1: I don't know.

569
00:22:48,840 --> 00:22:51,159
Speaker 2: It sounds like they were I like the question. I

570
00:22:51,160 --> 00:22:52,240
Speaker 2: don't really have a good answer.

571
00:22:52,800 --> 00:22:54,760
Speaker 4: I feel like three months you got to like cut

572
00:22:54,800 --> 00:22:56,959
Speaker 4: off the flirting with other people, like there's some there

573
00:22:56,960 --> 00:22:59,679
Speaker 4: could be some overlap, but like a year was too long.

574
00:22:59,800 --> 00:23:02,399
Speaker 6: Yeah, I think that's good advice. It doesn't sound idea.

575
00:23:02,960 --> 00:23:05,479
Speaker 2: Yeah, so like be pissed, but maybe don't break up

576
00:23:05,480 --> 00:23:05,760
Speaker 2: with them.

577
00:23:05,840 --> 00:23:08,400
Speaker 1: Well, definitely don't. Don't not acknowledge it.

578
00:23:08,520 --> 00:23:10,600
Speaker 3: You you can, you don't have to break up with him,

579
00:23:10,600 --> 00:23:11,919
Speaker 3: but you have to make sure he knows that you

580
00:23:12,040 --> 00:23:14,719
Speaker 3: know that and that that's not cool and you're upset.

581
00:23:15,119 --> 00:23:16,640
Speaker 1: You have every right to be upset about that.

582
00:23:16,800 --> 00:23:18,399
Speaker 2: Make him make it up to you. I think a

583
00:23:18,480 --> 00:23:20,639
Speaker 2: couple of nice baths, a couple of nice dinners.

584
00:23:20,600 --> 00:23:23,800
Speaker 1: A bath, that's not going to make anything up. I

585
00:23:26,400 --> 00:23:28,000
Speaker 1: h yeah, yeah.

586
00:23:28,080 --> 00:23:30,840
Speaker 6: A friend of mine is starting dating this guy that

587
00:23:30,840 --> 00:23:31,800
Speaker 6: that draws her baths.

588
00:23:31,960 --> 00:23:33,640
Speaker 3: Think you were going to say that drew her a bath,

589
00:23:33,760 --> 00:23:35,320
Speaker 3: is what you were going to say. I was going

590
00:23:35,400 --> 00:23:37,560
Speaker 3: to say, yeah, you should go for it, she drew

591
00:23:37,600 --> 00:23:38,200
Speaker 3: her a bath.

592
00:23:38,440 --> 00:23:40,600
Speaker 1: I think, go to college. I went to fucking Dick's sister.

593
00:23:40,640 --> 00:23:41,120
Speaker 1: What do you want?

594
00:23:42,680 --> 00:23:44,199
Speaker 6: I was going to say that, but a friend of

595
00:23:44,200 --> 00:23:47,720
Speaker 6: mine was dating guy for many years. Then their courtship

596
00:23:47,720 --> 00:23:50,800
Speaker 6: started by him drawing her bath, and I think that's disgusting.

597
00:23:51,880 --> 00:23:55,200
Speaker 2: Started like they were friends and he drew her a bath.

598
00:23:55,080 --> 00:23:57,320
Speaker 6: And then he started turning the baths water on like

599
00:23:57,320 --> 00:23:59,760
Speaker 6: when they were Yeah, yeah, and I think this is

600
00:23:59,800 --> 00:24:01,120
Speaker 6: so strange.

601
00:24:01,240 --> 00:24:01,480
Speaker 1: Yeah.

602
00:24:01,520 --> 00:24:03,880
Speaker 6: She said that like a few months into their friendship

603
00:24:04,040 --> 00:24:05,760
Speaker 6: he would just kind of like turn on a bath

604
00:24:06,080 --> 00:24:08,600
Speaker 6: and be like, hey, and that was how we kind

605
00:24:08,600 --> 00:24:10,280
Speaker 6: of like pulled her in fucked her.

606
00:24:10,600 --> 00:24:12,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's and then they would fuck in the bath.

607
00:24:12,760 --> 00:24:14,960
Speaker 3: I think he is really like to have sex and

608
00:24:15,080 --> 00:24:15,960
Speaker 3: baths or water.

609
00:24:17,200 --> 00:24:17,840
Speaker 2: It's because it's.

610
00:24:17,800 --> 00:24:20,040
Speaker 3: Confusing because you think the water will also serve as

611
00:24:20,080 --> 00:24:21,320
Speaker 3: a lubricant and that's not.

612
00:24:21,560 --> 00:24:26,639
Speaker 1: What works all. No, it's kind of frantic. It's like

613
00:24:26,680 --> 00:24:29,399
Speaker 1: a lot of sexy situations. It's actually very it sounds

614
00:24:29,400 --> 00:24:31,320
Speaker 1: like a very dry situation.

615
00:24:30,920 --> 00:24:34,480
Speaker 6: Ironically, in a in a pool of water. Yeah, he

616
00:24:34,520 --> 00:24:36,439
Speaker 6: would draw her a bath and then he.

617
00:24:36,440 --> 00:24:40,840
Speaker 1: Would bathe her for months. Oh no, and that's unacceptable. No, No,

618
00:24:41,119 --> 00:24:43,359
Speaker 1: it's not. Nobody's bathing me.

619
00:24:43,600 --> 00:24:44,920
Speaker 2: Try me math, get the fuck out.

620
00:24:45,960 --> 00:24:46,200
Speaker 7: Well.

621
00:24:46,280 --> 00:24:50,080
Speaker 4: Our next collor is Ali and Alie says, Dear Chelsea,

622
00:24:50,720 --> 00:24:52,760
Speaker 4: my husband and I moved away from home about four

623
00:24:52,840 --> 00:24:55,400
Speaker 4: years ago. We recently had a baby and have decided

624
00:24:55,400 --> 00:24:57,480
Speaker 4: to move closer to family and friends, as we both

625
00:24:57,520 --> 00:24:59,960
Speaker 4: work remotely and could use some interaction with other people.

626
00:25:00,000 --> 00:25:03,840
Speaker 4: We're about an hour's drive away from family. My husband's

627
00:25:03,840 --> 00:25:06,320
Speaker 4: family obviously missed us, and his mom from time to

628
00:25:06,359 --> 00:25:09,000
Speaker 4: time can be a bit much. However, my mom is

629
00:25:09,160 --> 00:25:12,680
Speaker 4: next level. Prior to me being pregnant, we never really talked,

630
00:25:12,680 --> 00:25:15,040
Speaker 4: as she was kind of a crappy parent. I'm having

631
00:25:15,080 --> 00:25:17,600
Speaker 4: a ton of anxiety about being closer to her, and

632
00:25:17,680 --> 00:25:19,840
Speaker 4: when we lift eleven and a half hours away, it's

633
00:25:19,840 --> 00:25:21,800
Speaker 4: been easy to keep her at arm's length, but now

634
00:25:21,800 --> 00:25:25,840
Speaker 4: she texts, calls, sends videos, etc. Multiple times a day.

635
00:25:26,359 --> 00:25:28,639
Speaker 4: When I say it's too much, she doesn't listen and says, well,

636
00:25:28,680 --> 00:25:30,760
Speaker 4: I'm the mom or grandma and I'll do whatever I want.

637
00:25:31,240 --> 00:25:33,280
Speaker 4: Then she proceeds to act like a toddler or spread

638
00:25:33,320 --> 00:25:36,000
Speaker 4: gossip through my family. She's the kind of person that

639
00:25:36,080 --> 00:25:38,520
Speaker 4: works in customer service but yells at waiters every time

640
00:25:38,560 --> 00:25:40,719
Speaker 4: we go out to eat. I'm wondering how to navigate

641
00:25:40,720 --> 00:25:42,959
Speaker 4: this relationship without blowing up. So she can see her

642
00:25:42,960 --> 00:25:45,400
Speaker 4: granddaughter every time I see her. After ten minutes, I'm

643
00:25:45,400 --> 00:25:46,919
Speaker 4: going crazy. Help Allie.

644
00:25:47,200 --> 00:25:50,640
Speaker 3: Oh sorry, Allie. That sounds like a fucking nightmare. Another

645
00:25:50,720 --> 00:25:53,800
Speaker 3: reason to never get married. Yeah, that's not good.

646
00:25:54,400 --> 00:25:56,840
Speaker 6: She sounds like a pretty I mean, she sounds like

647
00:25:57,600 --> 00:26:00,240
Speaker 6: a pretty unbearable twat. But I think you're I don't know,

648
00:26:00,359 --> 00:26:02,359
Speaker 6: trying to do the right thing by letting her have

649
00:26:02,440 --> 00:26:04,480
Speaker 6: access to your child. But I feel like it's less

650
00:26:04,520 --> 00:26:06,479
Speaker 6: as little as you can have to do with those plans,

651
00:26:06,520 --> 00:26:08,360
Speaker 6: the better, Like do it like have her take care

652
00:26:08,480 --> 00:26:10,560
Speaker 6: be with the kid the week you're going away, a

653
00:26:10,600 --> 00:26:14,560
Speaker 6: week you're going you know, horring in Hawaii? Ever take

654
00:26:14,560 --> 00:26:15,639
Speaker 6: care of the kid that weekend?

655
00:26:15,720 --> 00:26:17,919
Speaker 1: Do you have any plans to whr in Hawaii coming up?

656
00:26:18,119 --> 00:26:19,080
Speaker 5: Not as it right now?

657
00:26:19,240 --> 00:26:21,720
Speaker 3: Okay, Well obviously that can change in a minute. Anything

658
00:26:21,720 --> 00:26:24,679
Speaker 3: can change in an instant. So what has been You're like,

659
00:26:24,680 --> 00:26:26,439
Speaker 3: when you've tried to put up like a boundary with

660
00:26:26,480 --> 00:26:27,760
Speaker 3: her before, what has happened?

661
00:26:27,880 --> 00:26:31,159
Speaker 8: He basically says no, or she ignores it and will

662
00:26:31,200 --> 00:26:32,920
Speaker 8: text me like the next week and say so can

663
00:26:32,960 --> 00:26:35,080
Speaker 8: I come this week? Like just ignores the whole thing.

664
00:26:35,200 --> 00:26:35,400
Speaker 1: Yeah.

665
00:26:35,520 --> 00:26:37,880
Speaker 3: I find that to be incredibly annoying. People who don't

666
00:26:37,880 --> 00:26:40,399
Speaker 3: listen to you when you're setting up a boundary. So

667
00:26:40,520 --> 00:26:42,080
Speaker 3: I think you have to have like a more formal

668
00:26:42,119 --> 00:26:45,000
Speaker 3: conversation with her about it, just for your own sanity,

669
00:26:45,080 --> 00:26:47,000
Speaker 3: like it, don't worry about how she's going to react

670
00:26:47,040 --> 00:26:49,240
Speaker 3: to it, because people end up respecting boundaries in the

671
00:26:49,280 --> 00:26:51,360
Speaker 3: long term, they just don't like them in the beginning,

672
00:26:51,640 --> 00:26:53,879
Speaker 3: you know what I mean. So it works, And so

673
00:26:53,920 --> 00:26:56,800
Speaker 3: you're going to protect your like mental health and and

674
00:26:57,000 --> 00:26:58,560
Speaker 3: the health of your family because you don't want to

675
00:26:58,560 --> 00:27:00,480
Speaker 3: be fucking annoyed at her all the time. But you

676
00:27:00,560 --> 00:27:02,080
Speaker 3: have to be firm because she's not used to have

677
00:27:02,080 --> 00:27:04,359
Speaker 3: anyone telling her that there is a boundary.

678
00:27:04,400 --> 00:27:05,639
Speaker 1: It's one hundred percent true.

679
00:27:05,680 --> 00:27:07,640
Speaker 6: Also, I feel like the thing with people that don't

680
00:27:07,680 --> 00:27:10,199
Speaker 6: respect boundaries is that when you draw them, it's this

681
00:27:10,280 --> 00:27:12,960
Speaker 6: big lead up to saying something, and it's not that

682
00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:15,040
Speaker 6: big of a deal at all, because first of all,

683
00:27:15,080 --> 00:27:16,600
Speaker 6: they might not even listen to it, to which you

684
00:27:16,680 --> 00:27:18,600
Speaker 6: have to double down on it. But that moment isn't

685
00:27:18,600 --> 00:27:21,120
Speaker 6: that big because like they don't care, like they're used

686
00:27:21,119 --> 00:27:23,600
Speaker 6: to bulldozing through those things. So the very least you

687
00:27:23,600 --> 00:27:25,440
Speaker 6: can do, like this is the beginning of a longer

688
00:27:25,560 --> 00:27:27,560
Speaker 6: stretch you have to go through with her. At the

689
00:27:27,640 --> 00:27:29,920
Speaker 6: very least, just say something and be it clear. When

690
00:27:29,920 --> 00:27:33,120
Speaker 6: you're that ludicrous, when you're acting that insanely, like this

691
00:27:33,320 --> 00:27:35,840
Speaker 6: person has been told this many times before, you're not

692
00:27:35,880 --> 00:27:37,160
Speaker 6: you know what I mean? This isn't like, so don't

693
00:27:37,160 --> 00:27:37,760
Speaker 6: worry about that.

694
00:27:37,920 --> 00:27:38,359
Speaker 1: Just say it.

695
00:27:38,720 --> 00:27:41,000
Speaker 6: Yeah, just say it, say it quick, say it fast,

696
00:27:41,119 --> 00:27:43,359
Speaker 6: and say it in as few words as possible. I

697
00:27:43,400 --> 00:27:48,480
Speaker 6: feel like that's true for everything. I always over explain, apologize, defend.

698
00:27:49,200 --> 00:27:53,320
Speaker 6: Somebody told me this recently, Like justify, apologize. There's like

699
00:27:53,359 --> 00:27:56,520
Speaker 6: some acronym I'm forgetting, but defend. I think it's jade

700
00:27:56,640 --> 00:27:59,240
Speaker 6: or something. And try not to do any of those things.

701
00:27:59,640 --> 00:28:01,399
Speaker 6: And say it in as few words as possible in

702
00:28:01,440 --> 00:28:03,360
Speaker 6: a text or talk to your friend. Before you talk

703
00:28:03,400 --> 00:28:05,760
Speaker 6: to her, know exactly what you to say and nothing extra.

704
00:28:06,320 --> 00:28:08,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, and hold your ground, you know what I mean, Like,

705
00:28:08,640 --> 00:28:11,160
Speaker 3: don't say it and then get scared and run away,

706
00:28:11,200 --> 00:28:13,280
Speaker 3: Like say it, hold your ground. Machine understands that you

707
00:28:13,320 --> 00:28:16,719
Speaker 3: mean business like, maintain eye contact and be firm. You

708
00:28:16,760 --> 00:28:19,680
Speaker 3: have every right to do that for yourself. It doesn't

709
00:28:19,720 --> 00:28:21,880
Speaker 3: have to be like a big deal. Exactly what Rachel's saying,

710
00:28:21,920 --> 00:28:23,720
Speaker 3: it's just like you standing up for yourself, You're gonna

711
00:28:23,720 --> 00:28:26,080
Speaker 3: feel really good afterward and you might have to tell

712
00:28:26,080 --> 00:28:27,600
Speaker 3: her again, but that's okay.

713
00:28:28,080 --> 00:28:29,800
Speaker 1: Just practice advocating for yourself.

714
00:28:30,040 --> 00:28:32,520
Speaker 8: Yeah, I really like that advice. I think to like

715
00:28:32,560 --> 00:28:34,560
Speaker 8: just holding my ground. I like to eye contact too,

716
00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:35,920
Speaker 8: and not just like.

717
00:28:36,960 --> 00:28:39,160
Speaker 3: Or I get crazy eyes so they get really fucking

718
00:28:39,200 --> 00:28:40,840
Speaker 3: scared and then they're like, all right, all right, all right,

719
00:28:40,880 --> 00:28:41,360
Speaker 3: I won't.

720
00:28:41,160 --> 00:28:41,680
Speaker 1: Fucking bother you.

721
00:28:43,960 --> 00:28:46,720
Speaker 6: Yeah, I need a guy for a while that, Like,

722
00:28:47,200 --> 00:28:50,360
Speaker 6: his mom was just upset about absolutely everything about me,

723
00:28:50,480 --> 00:28:51,920
Speaker 6: and a lot of the things about me were just

724
00:28:51,960 --> 00:28:53,760
Speaker 6: things that were never going to change, things that she

725
00:28:53,800 --> 00:28:56,520
Speaker 6: thought I would find insulting, like that I'm not domestic

726
00:28:56,600 --> 00:28:58,320
Speaker 6: or that I'm not clean. I'm like, tell me a

727
00:28:58,320 --> 00:29:01,120
Speaker 6: better story, bitch, Like I'm I I've been a pig

728
00:29:01,240 --> 00:29:03,719
Speaker 6: my whole life. Like, and she was like, you know,

729
00:29:03,840 --> 00:29:06,680
Speaker 6: just kind of making these passive aggressive comments about what

730
00:29:06,800 --> 00:29:08,920
Speaker 6: I didn't do around the house, and I'm like, that's

731
00:29:08,960 --> 00:29:10,680
Speaker 6: not You could say a lot of things that will

732
00:29:10,720 --> 00:29:13,600
Speaker 6: immediately hurt me, but I'm like, and I learned to

733
00:29:13,680 --> 00:29:15,480
Speaker 6: just say to her very directly, oh I'm not going

734
00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:17,160
Speaker 6: to do that. I'm never going to do that. She'd like,

735
00:29:17,200 --> 00:29:19,479
Speaker 6: you know what you should do? You should, you know,

736
00:29:19,560 --> 00:29:21,640
Speaker 6: start gardening. I'm like, oh, that's not going to happen.

737
00:29:21,680 --> 00:29:23,920
Speaker 6: That's not going to occur. I would say it then,

738
00:29:23,960 --> 00:29:27,520
Speaker 6: like the dumbest, simplest way possible. And I felt like

739
00:29:27,560 --> 00:29:29,840
Speaker 6: she like she just kind of stopped after a while,

740
00:29:29,840 --> 00:29:32,120
Speaker 6: like she would come over and clean so much, like

741
00:29:32,120 --> 00:29:33,440
Speaker 6: in front of me to piss me off.

742
00:29:33,440 --> 00:29:34,520
Speaker 1: But I was like, no, that's helpful.

743
00:29:34,520 --> 00:29:36,240
Speaker 6: I had a friend over one since she was doing it,

744
00:29:36,480 --> 00:29:37,800
Speaker 6: and he was like, if you want to get behind

745
00:29:37,800 --> 00:29:38,160
Speaker 6: the couch.

746
00:29:38,160 --> 00:29:38,800
Speaker 1: She was comic.

747
00:29:39,120 --> 00:29:40,520
Speaker 6: He's like, if you want to get behind the couch,

748
00:29:40,520 --> 00:29:42,600
Speaker 6: she just get that corner right there, like he was

749
00:29:42,640 --> 00:29:43,320
Speaker 6: directing her.

750
00:29:43,840 --> 00:29:46,240
Speaker 1: So I feel like I feel like with people like that, like.

751
00:29:46,240 --> 00:29:50,360
Speaker 6: Yeah, as direct as you could ever be, and she

752
00:29:50,520 --> 00:29:52,760
Speaker 6: wants what you have, like she wants access to that kid,

753
00:29:52,800 --> 00:29:54,680
Speaker 6: you know what I'm saying. So, like, you're in control

754
00:29:54,720 --> 00:29:57,320
Speaker 6: in this situation when we're more vulnerables, when we don't

755
00:29:57,400 --> 00:29:59,880
Speaker 6: need something, you need very little except to be left alone.

756
00:30:00,480 --> 00:30:03,560
Speaker 2: Is your partner somebody who can tolerate being around your.

757
00:30:03,520 --> 00:30:06,640
Speaker 8: Mom for a short amount of times? Yes, but he

758
00:30:06,680 --> 00:30:08,480
Speaker 8: is a lot more comfortable being direct with her. So

759
00:30:08,560 --> 00:30:10,640
Speaker 8: maybe I just like kind of follow his lead because

760
00:30:10,960 --> 00:30:12,840
Speaker 8: he does do that and it does work. She does

761
00:30:12,880 --> 00:30:13,520
Speaker 8: listen to him.

762
00:30:13,800 --> 00:30:16,560
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry, is this your mom or his mom?

763
00:30:17,000 --> 00:30:17,840
Speaker 5: This is my mom?

764
00:30:17,920 --> 00:30:19,280
Speaker 2: I go fucking tell her.

765
00:30:19,200 --> 00:30:20,400
Speaker 1: To fucking back off.

766
00:30:20,520 --> 00:30:23,520
Speaker 3: Then I was thinking this is his mom the whole time.

767
00:30:23,560 --> 00:30:26,920
Speaker 3: I'm like, no, you tell your mother to fucking stop it.

768
00:30:27,000 --> 00:30:29,760
Speaker 3: She doesn't get to overrule you. You're an adult woman

769
00:30:29,800 --> 00:30:30,800
Speaker 3: now with your own kids.

770
00:30:30,880 --> 00:30:33,600
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, that's what I tried.

771
00:30:33,920 --> 00:30:36,640
Speaker 8: I've recently tried being like I'm not asking, I'm telling,

772
00:30:36,840 --> 00:30:38,320
Speaker 8: So I'm just gonna stick to that.

773
00:30:38,520 --> 00:30:40,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, you have to be very firm with your own mother.

774
00:30:41,360 --> 00:30:43,920
Speaker 6: I didn't realize that either, that if it's until just now.

775
00:30:43,960 --> 00:30:45,480
Speaker 6: I was laid to that party too, But yeah, if

776
00:30:45,480 --> 00:30:46,120
Speaker 6: it's your own mom.

777
00:30:46,200 --> 00:30:50,920
Speaker 8: Yeah, it flipped in the mother in law thing there, And.

778
00:30:50,120 --> 00:30:52,600
Speaker 6: My mom is here right now, and she does a

779
00:30:52,640 --> 00:30:55,280
Speaker 6: thing when I tell her something clearly, she gets wounded

780
00:30:55,320 --> 00:30:58,000
Speaker 6: immediately and starts like weeping. So like I was like, hey,

781
00:30:58,080 --> 00:31:01,000
Speaker 6: can you get something for my daughter's birthday party, like

782
00:31:01,000 --> 00:31:02,560
Speaker 6: to fill these goodie bags? Because I was like, on

783
00:31:02,600 --> 00:31:04,719
Speaker 6: these zooms yesterday and I was like, just get anything

784
00:31:04,760 --> 00:31:06,280
Speaker 6: to put in a goodie bag. She came back with

785
00:31:06,360 --> 00:31:09,480
Speaker 6: like sheets of like shit stickers, like poopsticker, and I

786
00:31:09,480 --> 00:31:10,600
Speaker 6: was like, Mom, I can't put this in her like

787
00:31:10,600 --> 00:31:12,480
Speaker 6: four year old goodie bagh's that's shit.

788
00:31:13,080 --> 00:31:15,840
Speaker 1: She's like, well, I'm sorry, Rachel. I did the damn

789
00:31:15,960 --> 00:31:16,760
Speaker 1: best I could.

790
00:31:16,920 --> 00:31:19,400
Speaker 6: Like she starts weeping, and like five years ago, I

791
00:31:19,440 --> 00:31:21,560
Speaker 6: would have felt like I had just assaulted my mother

792
00:31:21,600 --> 00:31:23,440
Speaker 6: because she always weeps if you give her a note,

793
00:31:23,520 --> 00:31:26,120
Speaker 6: you know. But now I'm just like, Mom, you can

794
00:31:26,160 --> 00:31:27,959
Speaker 6: weep or not, but I can't like put shit stickers

795
00:31:27,960 --> 00:31:29,880
Speaker 6: in here, like and I'm gonna get on this zoom now,

796
00:31:29,880 --> 00:31:30,800
Speaker 6: can you get something else?

797
00:31:30,880 --> 00:31:31,080
Speaker 5: You know?

798
00:31:31,360 --> 00:31:33,560
Speaker 6: And I also realized, like she's always going to.

799
00:31:33,560 --> 00:31:34,440
Speaker 2: Be weeping because that about me.

800
00:31:34,480 --> 00:31:36,920
Speaker 1: It's about her alcoholic mother or something, you know what

801
00:31:36,960 --> 00:31:39,520
Speaker 1: I mean. Like I don't take it personally anymore.

802
00:31:39,600 --> 00:31:42,240
Speaker 6: My mom always has like a sort of vaguely muttering

803
00:31:42,280 --> 00:31:44,520
Speaker 6: to herself for weeping, and I just know that that's

804
00:31:44,560 --> 00:31:46,760
Speaker 6: what she likes to do and she probably won't stop,

805
00:31:46,920 --> 00:31:48,320
Speaker 6: but she's here, she's helping out.

806
00:31:48,440 --> 00:31:50,160
Speaker 1: I'm not taking on her her day weeping.

807
00:31:50,480 --> 00:31:51,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's very good advice.

808
00:31:51,800 --> 00:31:53,240
Speaker 1: Yeah, we have a better relationship now.

809
00:31:53,320 --> 00:31:55,440
Speaker 8: I like the advice of not taking it myself, like

810
00:31:55,560 --> 00:31:57,520
Speaker 8: not personal at all, just living not personal.

811
00:31:57,840 --> 00:31:58,040
Speaker 4: Yeah.

812
00:31:58,680 --> 00:32:01,800
Speaker 6: My friend Jessica Curson really funny comics. She always says,

813
00:32:01,840 --> 00:32:05,680
Speaker 6: like people are insane. They are walking around furious all day.

814
00:32:06,040 --> 00:32:06,920
Speaker 6: It doesn't have.

815
00:32:06,880 --> 00:32:07,760
Speaker 1: Anything to do with you.

816
00:32:07,880 --> 00:32:10,800
Speaker 6: Usually, you know, like people are just not okay, they're

817
00:32:10,800 --> 00:32:13,800
Speaker 6: not well. Yeah, so if you can imagine a little sticker,

818
00:32:13,840 --> 00:32:15,240
Speaker 6: She always says that to me, just imagine a little

819
00:32:15,240 --> 00:32:18,440
Speaker 6: sticker on this person's forehead that says sick. And that's

820
00:32:18,600 --> 00:32:20,920
Speaker 6: always a helpful tool for me when I'm communicating to

821
00:32:21,000 --> 00:32:21,840
Speaker 6: not personalize.

822
00:32:21,960 --> 00:32:24,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, all right, Ali, is that helpful?

823
00:32:24,880 --> 00:32:25,760
Speaker 8: Yes, so helpful.

824
00:32:25,800 --> 00:32:27,280
Speaker 5: I'm excited to share it at work.

825
00:32:28,120 --> 00:32:32,760
Speaker 1: Okay, thank you, Sally, Okay, bye bye. I think it's

826
00:32:32,760 --> 00:32:34,520
Speaker 1: funny that we both missed the main part of that.

827
00:32:35,720 --> 00:32:36,400
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I know.

828
00:32:36,560 --> 00:32:38,160
Speaker 3: You should have seen me last week. I was like,

829
00:32:38,200 --> 00:32:40,760
Speaker 3: I got the whole story backwards. I'm like, what, I'm

830
00:32:40,800 --> 00:32:43,160
Speaker 3: listening and then I'm confused. I don't understand.

831
00:32:44,120 --> 00:32:44,360
Speaker 2: Well.

832
00:32:44,400 --> 00:32:47,720
Speaker 4: Our next caller is Ryan and he's calling in from Norway.

833
00:32:48,320 --> 00:32:51,400
Speaker 4: He says, dear Chelsea, Hi, I'm Ryan. I'm originally from

834
00:32:51,440 --> 00:32:54,040
Speaker 4: Vancouver Island and I've been living in Oslo, Norway for

835
00:32:54,040 --> 00:32:57,040
Speaker 4: the past four years. I originally moved to Scandinavia for

836
00:32:57,080 --> 00:32:59,959
Speaker 4: a wonderful Norwegian man. Although they're all introverts, they can

837
00:33:00,240 --> 00:33:04,600
Speaker 4: be very intoxicating. However, our four year relationship ended last autumn.

838
00:33:05,040 --> 00:33:07,080
Speaker 4: I've been on a beautiful journey of healing and self

839
00:33:07,080 --> 00:33:09,320
Speaker 4: love lately and have been filling my own cup. But

840
00:33:09,440 --> 00:33:11,240
Speaker 4: I'm unsure of how much i want to include my

841
00:33:11,280 --> 00:33:13,920
Speaker 4: ex in my life. Any advice on how to navigate this?

842
00:33:14,480 --> 00:33:16,760
Speaker 4: Cheers in a big hug from finally sunny Oslo.

843
00:33:17,080 --> 00:33:17,440
Speaker 2: Ryan.

844
00:33:18,040 --> 00:33:23,760
Speaker 3: Hi, Ryan, Hi, Ryan, Hello, Hi, I'm coming to Oslo.

845
00:33:23,920 --> 00:33:25,840
Speaker 3: I'm coming to perform there. I think in the fall.

846
00:33:26,120 --> 00:33:27,680
Speaker 5: No way, Oh my goodness.

847
00:33:27,760 --> 00:33:30,040
Speaker 3: I was there last summer. I saw Springsteen in Oslo.

848
00:33:30,200 --> 00:33:32,560
Speaker 3: It was so fun outside at that outdoor park.

849
00:33:32,800 --> 00:33:34,800
Speaker 5: You and all my lesbian friends amazing.

850
00:33:34,920 --> 00:33:38,440
Speaker 3: I know I was. I got confused with lesbian a lot. Actually,

851
00:33:39,560 --> 00:33:41,560
Speaker 3: So what's the status of the relationship now?

852
00:33:42,040 --> 00:33:42,200
Speaker 5: Yeah?

853
00:33:42,240 --> 00:33:44,440
Speaker 7: So the status is I mean, we're our lives are

854
00:33:44,480 --> 00:33:48,120
Speaker 7: longer entangled at all. He's a truly incredible person and

855
00:33:48,280 --> 00:33:50,400
Speaker 7: a really lovely guy. We broke up about just under

856
00:33:50,440 --> 00:33:52,760
Speaker 7: eight months ago. We were friends for four years and

857
00:33:52,800 --> 00:33:56,080
Speaker 7: then we dated for four years, and now I'm like, oh,

858
00:33:56,200 --> 00:33:58,040
Speaker 7: could we could we be friends again?

859
00:33:58,560 --> 00:33:59,440
Speaker 5: Is that realistic?

860
00:34:00,040 --> 00:34:01,000
Speaker 1: Feel attracted to him?

861
00:34:01,360 --> 00:34:01,920
Speaker 5: Like sexually?

862
00:34:02,400 --> 00:34:02,840
Speaker 1: Yeah?

863
00:34:03,000 --> 00:34:03,880
Speaker 5: Not right now? No?

864
00:34:04,200 --> 00:34:06,240
Speaker 1: What do you mean right? Not right now? Like it

865
00:34:06,280 --> 00:34:09,759
Speaker 1: can come back though, just after this autumn after I

866
00:34:09,760 --> 00:34:10,759
Speaker 1: think no. I think so.

867
00:34:10,800 --> 00:34:13,440
Speaker 7: We broke up because a couple of reasons, but the

868
00:34:13,480 --> 00:34:16,040
Speaker 7: main reason was I wanted to explore something more open,

869
00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:21,080
Speaker 7: and he, although it was very willing to have that discussion, didn't.

870
00:34:21,760 --> 00:34:24,200
Speaker 5: And so when we did open our relationship, we brought.

871
00:34:24,000 --> 00:34:27,560
Speaker 7: In a mutual friend, which then led to be demise

872
00:34:27,719 --> 00:34:29,000
Speaker 7: of our of our relationship.

873
00:34:29,200 --> 00:34:35,520
Speaker 3: That track what an unusual ending, I know, I mean, honestly,

874
00:34:35,800 --> 00:34:37,960
Speaker 3: so sounds a little bit like you're still hung up

875
00:34:38,000 --> 00:34:38,640
Speaker 3: on this guy.

876
00:34:38,520 --> 00:34:38,839
Speaker 1: Are you.

877
00:34:39,080 --> 00:34:40,960
Speaker 7: I wouldn't say I'm hung up on him anymore, honestly.

878
00:34:41,080 --> 00:34:42,680
Speaker 7: The thing is, we have a lot of like in common,

879
00:34:43,000 --> 00:34:45,959
Speaker 7: and so when I moved to Norway with my ex,

880
00:34:46,160 --> 00:34:48,640
Speaker 7: I'm originally from British Columbia, Canada, and so when I

881
00:34:48,719 --> 00:34:51,840
Speaker 7: moved here, like all of my network was through my ex.

882
00:34:52,160 --> 00:34:53,840
Speaker 7: I don't think I'm hung up on him anymore, but

883
00:34:53,880 --> 00:34:55,959
Speaker 7: I do think there may be place in my life

884
00:34:56,000 --> 00:34:59,280
Speaker 7: for him. But I'm not sure how to even approach

885
00:34:59,360 --> 00:34:59,880
Speaker 7: that topic.

886
00:35:00,680 --> 00:35:02,800
Speaker 3: If you guys were friends for four years and you

887
00:35:02,920 --> 00:35:05,160
Speaker 3: dated for four years, I think it's totally realistic that

888
00:35:05,200 --> 00:35:07,319
Speaker 3: you could be friends again. It's hard to be friends

889
00:35:07,320 --> 00:35:09,239
Speaker 3: with someone when you haven't been friends with them ever

890
00:35:09,280 --> 00:35:12,279
Speaker 3: and you've only been romantic. But if you're friends, you

891
00:35:12,280 --> 00:35:14,279
Speaker 3: can always go back to that. Yeah, people do it

892
00:35:14,320 --> 00:35:17,080
Speaker 3: all the time, and I mean you have the perfect

893
00:35:17,120 --> 00:35:18,480
Speaker 3: excuse or reason.

894
00:35:18,640 --> 00:35:20,400
Speaker 1: It's not really an excuse, it's a reason.

895
00:35:20,800 --> 00:35:23,879
Speaker 2: How would you approach that conversation with him to reconnect?

896
00:35:24,040 --> 00:35:27,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I would just say, like here, I you know,

897
00:35:27,239 --> 00:35:31,120
Speaker 3: I'm here living in Norway, and like, you know, obviously

898
00:35:31,800 --> 00:35:34,640
Speaker 3: this is how we're connected, and I'm here and it's

899
00:35:34,680 --> 00:35:35,319
Speaker 3: been a long time.

900
00:35:35,400 --> 00:35:36,480
Speaker 1: I'm like, I hope you're well.

901
00:35:37,000 --> 00:35:40,560
Speaker 3: Send him a really thoughtful, nice email checking on him

902
00:35:40,600 --> 00:35:43,040
Speaker 3: and you'd love to see him, But make it clear

903
00:35:43,120 --> 00:35:45,920
Speaker 3: that you're coming from a friend's perspective, don't make it

904
00:35:45,920 --> 00:35:46,800
Speaker 3: flirty or weird.

905
00:35:47,440 --> 00:35:50,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, you could even say, like you could you refer to.

906
00:35:50,000 --> 00:35:52,680
Speaker 6: Some earlier period of your life where I mean earlier time,

907
00:35:52,680 --> 00:35:54,239
Speaker 6: when you guys used to be friends, something used to do.

908
00:35:54,280 --> 00:35:56,160
Speaker 1: Then I miss when we were whenever.

909
00:35:56,239 --> 00:35:59,120
Speaker 6: I know things didn't work out with but I enjoyed

910
00:35:59,160 --> 00:36:01,279
Speaker 6: talking out out, which is so it makes it really

911
00:36:01,280 --> 00:36:03,240
Speaker 6: clear that I think that is important.

912
00:36:03,360 --> 00:36:05,759
Speaker 1: That's not making it clear, Rachel, because that's making it confusing.

913
00:36:05,840 --> 00:36:08,920
Speaker 3: I think to say I really enjoyed hanging out with you.

914
00:36:08,960 --> 00:36:11,360
Speaker 3: Oh you mean in addition to fucking you like the

915
00:36:11,440 --> 00:36:12,359
Speaker 3: other things I liked?

916
00:36:12,440 --> 00:36:16,600
Speaker 6: Oh, I know absolutely, I know you're right, You're absolutely right. No, yeah,

917
00:36:16,640 --> 00:36:18,680
Speaker 6: you want to make it say when you weren't inside me.

918
00:36:18,800 --> 00:36:21,480
Speaker 6: I guess it's what you should add in parentheses, when

919
00:36:21,640 --> 00:36:22,640
Speaker 6: we weren't inside each other.

920
00:36:22,640 --> 00:36:25,319
Speaker 3: I think, just don't tell him you like anything about him.

921
00:36:25,360 --> 00:36:30,000
Speaker 3: Don't say that right now. Just reach out and send

922
00:36:30,040 --> 00:36:32,760
Speaker 3: a really nice email checking in how he's doing.

923
00:36:33,239 --> 00:36:35,120
Speaker 1: You love Norway, bring up things that.

924
00:36:35,040 --> 00:36:37,560
Speaker 3: There's going to be a response to, right, like all

925
00:36:37,600 --> 00:36:39,719
Speaker 3: the cool things about Norway that you've discovered or that

926
00:36:39,760 --> 00:36:42,680
Speaker 3: you love, that you've rediscovered, or that remind.

927
00:36:42,360 --> 00:36:46,000
Speaker 1: You of him, whatever, but in a non romantic attitude.

928
00:36:46,160 --> 00:36:48,480
Speaker 7: Okay, yeah, and I think that that's probably the right way.

929
00:36:48,760 --> 00:36:50,560
Speaker 7: So the last time I saw him. He mentioned that

930
00:36:50,640 --> 00:36:53,440
Speaker 7: his father had health problems, and you know, I burst

931
00:36:53,440 --> 00:36:55,640
Speaker 7: into chairs and I thought, this is someone I spent

932
00:36:55,680 --> 00:36:56,520
Speaker 7: for Christmas is with.

933
00:36:56,560 --> 00:36:58,440
Speaker 5: This is someone I really used to care about. And

934
00:36:58,480 --> 00:36:59,759
Speaker 5: I asked like, oh, do you want to hug and

935
00:37:00,160 --> 00:37:03,919
Speaker 5: said no. I thought, oh my god, you're right now.

936
00:37:05,160 --> 00:37:07,440
Speaker 1: What he wanted to hug you before? Like was that?

937
00:37:07,640 --> 00:37:08,879
Speaker 1: Was he never a hunting guy?

938
00:37:09,040 --> 00:37:09,319
Speaker 6: He was?

939
00:37:09,680 --> 00:37:11,000
Speaker 5: I mean, it's funny.

940
00:37:11,040 --> 00:37:13,680
Speaker 7: Maybe I forced him to be like a physical person

941
00:37:13,719 --> 00:37:17,000
Speaker 7: when we were together, because I'm quite well.

942
00:37:17,080 --> 00:37:19,560
Speaker 6: I mean, that's probably a good sign that he in

943
00:37:19,600 --> 00:37:22,399
Speaker 6: a way because the fact that he wasn't immediately like yes,

944
00:37:22,560 --> 00:37:25,120
Speaker 6: like maybe when you do set those clear boundaries again,

945
00:37:25,200 --> 00:37:26,480
Speaker 6: take none of my instructions.

946
00:37:26,520 --> 00:37:29,400
Speaker 1: Now that I think about it a second second, that's awful.

947
00:37:29,520 --> 00:37:32,960
Speaker 3: Don't take anything, Rachel says seriously, and I'm right behind her.

948
00:37:33,200 --> 00:37:38,200
Speaker 1: So you've got Catherine left only at Chelsea's instructions.

949
00:37:38,200 --> 00:37:42,040
Speaker 3: But I feel like this is an instruction only. I

950
00:37:42,120 --> 00:37:43,719
Speaker 3: still think you're hung up on him. I don't know

951
00:37:43,719 --> 00:37:45,479
Speaker 3: what it is, but you are giving off a vibe

952
00:37:45,520 --> 00:37:47,120
Speaker 3: that you're into him and you want to get in

953
00:37:47,200 --> 00:37:48,759
Speaker 3: and you're pretending that you want to be friends but

954
00:37:48,800 --> 00:37:49,560
Speaker 3: you want to tell.

955
00:37:49,440 --> 00:37:49,960
Speaker 1: You way it is.

956
00:37:50,040 --> 00:37:52,239
Speaker 6: It's because why would there even be a t the

957
00:37:52,280 --> 00:37:55,200
Speaker 6: fact that it's being discussed at all, Like, you wouldn't

958
00:37:55,160 --> 00:37:57,000
Speaker 6: be thinking about it this much if you're talking thinking

959
00:37:57,000 --> 00:38:00,160
Speaker 6: about talking to somebody again that you aren't attracted to

960
00:38:00,239 --> 00:38:02,160
Speaker 6: anymore or have no lingering feelings for it.

961
00:38:02,080 --> 00:38:03,560
Speaker 1: It would just be like you do or you don't.

962
00:38:03,640 --> 00:38:06,279
Speaker 6: Like I feel like you wouldn't waste this precious time

963
00:38:06,320 --> 00:38:09,800
Speaker 6: with my brilliant advice. Oh but I mean, like, I

964
00:38:09,800 --> 00:38:12,439
Speaker 6: don't know, there's probably something there. Yeah, so maybe take

965
00:38:12,440 --> 00:38:13,440
Speaker 6: a take a look at it.

966
00:38:13,719 --> 00:38:15,480
Speaker 5: I think there is probably something there.

967
00:38:15,719 --> 00:38:18,960
Speaker 7: I don't think I want to pursue anything like we had,

968
00:38:19,400 --> 00:38:20,920
Speaker 7: like you know, we were living together for four years.

969
00:38:20,960 --> 00:38:23,120
Speaker 7: I don't think I want to pursue that again. And

970
00:38:23,160 --> 00:38:25,839
Speaker 7: I do want to pursue something more open with other people.

971
00:38:25,880 --> 00:38:29,560
Speaker 7: And I've started recently dating again, which is felt interesting

972
00:38:29,600 --> 00:38:31,839
Speaker 7: and nice. But I think I think, Chelsea, you might

973
00:38:31,880 --> 00:38:34,239
Speaker 7: be right that there are some lingering feelings.

974
00:38:34,560 --> 00:38:35,320
Speaker 1: You're the way you're.

975
00:38:35,200 --> 00:38:37,600
Speaker 3: Talking about it, it's just like you're you're something you

976
00:38:37,640 --> 00:38:39,880
Speaker 3: want unfinished or something's unfinished.

977
00:38:39,920 --> 00:38:43,800
Speaker 6: Yeah, it's too whimsical. It's too whimsical or something. Something's

978
00:38:43,840 --> 00:38:44,440
Speaker 6: not tracking.

979
00:38:44,680 --> 00:38:47,600
Speaker 1: Go get your tarot cards read. It's for a real answer.

980
00:38:47,880 --> 00:38:48,440
Speaker 1: I like that.

981
00:38:48,560 --> 00:38:49,680
Speaker 2: I like that answer for this.

982
00:38:50,160 --> 00:38:53,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, if you want the truth, go get your tarot

983
00:38:53,239 --> 00:38:53,879
Speaker 3: cards read.

984
00:38:54,480 --> 00:38:56,480
Speaker 2: And if he's not interested, I think you got to.

985
00:38:56,560 --> 00:38:58,880
Speaker 4: You got to give him space, like yeah, months before

986
00:38:58,920 --> 00:38:59,760
Speaker 4: you reach out again.

987
00:39:00,040 --> 00:39:02,160
Speaker 5: And there's a lot of other beautiful Norwegians out there.

988
00:39:02,239 --> 00:39:04,600
Speaker 1: So that's what I say. I bet so I start

989
00:39:04,680 --> 00:39:06,280
Speaker 1: my day. That's my morning affirmation.

990
00:39:06,719 --> 00:39:09,040
Speaker 6: You're very handsome, Ryan. I feel like you'll do well.

991
00:39:09,120 --> 00:39:10,360
Speaker 6: I'm not worried about your numbers.

992
00:39:11,800 --> 00:39:12,600
Speaker 5: That's very generous.

993
00:39:12,640 --> 00:39:16,400
Speaker 4: Thank you all right, thank you so much, Ryan, Thanks Ryan,

994
00:39:16,640 --> 00:39:17,279
Speaker 4: thank you three.

995
00:39:17,560 --> 00:39:17,920
Speaker 1: Thank you.

996
00:39:17,960 --> 00:39:18,160
Speaker 3: Guy.

997
00:39:19,640 --> 00:39:21,560
Speaker 1: He's like, I'm in Norway and never gets stark here.

998
00:39:21,680 --> 00:39:22,399
Speaker 2: No, yeah, he said.

999
00:39:22,440 --> 00:39:25,480
Speaker 4: He was like, this is the midnight sun now, so well,

1000
00:39:25,560 --> 00:39:27,080
Speaker 4: let's take a quick break and we'll be back with

1001
00:39:27,080 --> 00:39:27,839
Speaker 4: a quickie.

1002
00:39:27,560 --> 00:39:28,000
Speaker 2: To wrap up.

1003
00:39:28,080 --> 00:39:33,680
Speaker 1: Okay, and we're back.

1004
00:39:33,920 --> 00:39:35,799
Speaker 4: We are back now. This email is not very quick,

1005
00:39:35,800 --> 00:39:36,919
Speaker 4: but I think the answer will be quick.

1006
00:39:37,040 --> 00:39:38,960
Speaker 3: Let me try and stay focused, Rachel, You and I

1007
00:39:39,000 --> 00:39:41,239
Speaker 3: will be trying to focused if we both try to

1008
00:39:41,280 --> 00:39:42,480
Speaker 3: focus at the same time.

1009
00:39:42,520 --> 00:39:44,040
Speaker 1: Who knows what kind of focus.

1010
00:39:43,760 --> 00:39:47,880
Speaker 4: We can gather, Amanda says, Dear Chelsea, Chelsea, I adore you,

1011
00:39:47,960 --> 00:39:49,759
Speaker 4: and I hope my life looks like yours one day.

1012
00:39:50,239 --> 00:39:52,520
Speaker 4: My best friend of over twenty five years got married

1013
00:39:52,560 --> 00:39:55,279
Speaker 4: last November. I planned the bridle shower because she lost

1014
00:39:55,280 --> 00:39:57,160
Speaker 4: her mother the summer we were going into high school,

1015
00:39:57,200 --> 00:39:59,239
Speaker 4: so my mother and I spent over twenty five hundred

1016
00:39:59,239 --> 00:40:01,920
Speaker 4: dollars on the Bridle show. She then had a destination

1017
00:40:02,080 --> 00:40:04,920
Speaker 4: bachelorette at Walt Disney World, which ended up costing me

1018
00:40:04,960 --> 00:40:07,200
Speaker 4: another two grand, and not to mention, she convinced me

1019
00:40:07,239 --> 00:40:09,359
Speaker 4: to get an annual pass because she claimed we would

1020
00:40:09,400 --> 00:40:11,080
Speaker 4: go back together in the next year, which was an

1021
00:40:11,080 --> 00:40:14,440
Speaker 4: additional five hundred dollars. Her wedding was a destination wedding

1022
00:40:14,520 --> 00:40:17,239
Speaker 4: in Mexico, which cost me over four grand, and I

1023
00:40:17,360 --> 00:40:21,000
Speaker 4: photographed her wedding, which is about a five thousand dollars value.

1024
00:40:21,400 --> 00:40:22,960
Speaker 4: There was a lot of drama leading up to the

1025
00:40:22,960 --> 00:40:27,520
Speaker 4: wedding with price is right. There was a lot of

1026
00:40:27,600 --> 00:40:29,960
Speaker 4: drama leading up to the wedding with her and another

1027
00:40:29,960 --> 00:40:33,239
Speaker 4: bride'smaid being very selfish, and she proceeded to make my

1028
00:40:33,280 --> 00:40:35,080
Speaker 4: life a living hell for the rest of the year.

1029
00:40:35,120 --> 00:40:37,560
Speaker 2: I think this is the other bridesmaid. My best friend.

1030
00:40:37,560 --> 00:40:39,680
Speaker 4: The bride continued to ask me to be the bigger

1031
00:40:39,719 --> 00:40:41,879
Speaker 4: person through all of the events and bite my tongue

1032
00:40:41,920 --> 00:40:43,960
Speaker 4: and not say anything to her, and I did just that.

1033
00:40:44,680 --> 00:40:47,120
Speaker 4: The wedding, everything went off without a hitch. I was

1034
00:40:47,160 --> 00:40:49,719
Speaker 4: the maid of honor, so I hired someone to come

1035
00:40:49,760 --> 00:40:51,279
Speaker 4: with me and be able to shoot the wedding since

1036
00:40:51,280 --> 00:40:53,799
Speaker 4: I was in it. Fast forward to the last day

1037
00:40:53,800 --> 00:40:56,000
Speaker 4: of the four day weekend we spent in Mexico. I

1038
00:40:56,080 --> 00:40:58,200
Speaker 4: admittedly got a little too drunk, which is something that

1039
00:40:58,280 --> 00:41:00,680
Speaker 4: is very uncharacteristic of me, and I haven't been that

1040
00:41:00,760 --> 00:41:02,799
Speaker 4: drunk in like seven years, and I lost all my

1041
00:41:02,880 --> 00:41:05,520
Speaker 4: inhibitions and said things to that other bridesmaid and her

1042
00:41:05,600 --> 00:41:09,520
Speaker 4: husband basically made a fool of myself. I have since apologized,

1043
00:41:09,520 --> 00:41:11,560
Speaker 4: but me and my best friend have not spoken since

1044
00:41:11,560 --> 00:41:14,480
Speaker 4: the wedding. Now to my question, since I obviously have

1045
00:41:14,560 --> 00:41:17,160
Speaker 4: her wedding photos, I assume this is something she probably

1046
00:41:17,160 --> 00:41:19,120
Speaker 4: wants as it has all of her photos of her

1047
00:41:19,120 --> 00:41:21,080
Speaker 4: guests and her and her husband, and I don't want.

1048
00:41:20,920 --> 00:41:22,680
Speaker 2: To just give her these photos for free.

1049
00:41:23,200 --> 00:41:25,239
Speaker 4: My question to you is if I should send an

1050
00:41:25,239 --> 00:41:28,040
Speaker 4: email stating If she wants these photos, the dollar amount

1051
00:41:28,080 --> 00:41:31,000
Speaker 4: is xyz, and if she doesn't, I'm happy to delete them.

1052
00:41:31,440 --> 00:41:33,360
Speaker 4: I understand that money is not everything, but I'm a

1053
00:41:33,400 --> 00:41:35,799
Speaker 4: single woman running my own small business, and she has

1054
00:41:35,840 --> 00:41:38,080
Speaker 4: way more money than I do. And I've wasted over

1055
00:41:38,120 --> 00:41:41,239
Speaker 4: thirteen thousand dollars this last year on nothing. It was

1056
00:41:41,239 --> 00:41:43,000
Speaker 4: a waste of my time, a waste of my money.

1057
00:41:43,040 --> 00:41:44,560
Speaker 4: And I did all those things for her because I

1058
00:41:44,640 --> 00:41:47,120
Speaker 4: thought we were important to each other. Obviously, over the

1059
00:41:47,200 --> 00:41:49,239
Speaker 4: last few months I missed her occasionally, but not quite

1060
00:41:49,239 --> 00:41:51,120
Speaker 4: as much as I thought I would. So please let

1061
00:41:51,160 --> 00:41:52,319
Speaker 4: me know if you think it's worth it to ask

1062
00:41:52,360 --> 00:41:53,920
Speaker 4: her to pay for the photos, or if I should

1063
00:41:53,920 --> 00:41:56,279
Speaker 4: not contact her unless she contacts me about them.

1064
00:41:56,760 --> 00:41:58,480
Speaker 2: Thank you so much for your time. I love you all.

1065
00:41:58,560 --> 00:42:01,319
Speaker 4: Keep doing the good work you do. Sincerely, Amanda, and

1066
00:42:01,360 --> 00:42:03,640
Speaker 4: no need to keep me anonymous. Let that bitch hear

1067
00:42:03,680 --> 00:42:05,520
Speaker 4: it a journey.

1068
00:42:06,320 --> 00:42:09,040
Speaker 1: Jesus, fuck dear. What do you think, Rachel?

1069
00:42:09,480 --> 00:42:12,840
Speaker 6: I think you should do a little less accounting, a

1070
00:42:12,960 --> 00:42:17,319
Speaker 6: little a little less tallying. Yeah yeah, I think if

1071
00:42:17,360 --> 00:42:20,239
Speaker 6: you give somebody something, you just give it to them.

1072
00:42:20,480 --> 00:42:22,719
Speaker 6: You're acting like an accountant. These are like the commission

1073
00:42:22,719 --> 00:42:25,440
Speaker 6: statements I get from my agency, like, you can't. You

1074
00:42:25,520 --> 00:42:27,120
Speaker 6: just got to give it to them, and you can't

1075
00:42:27,160 --> 00:42:28,840
Speaker 6: be like if I was this, if we were friends,

1076
00:42:28,920 --> 00:42:32,919
Speaker 6: then A, B and C. Personally, I think you might

1077
00:42:33,760 --> 00:42:37,120
Speaker 6: want to just give her her wedding photos and work

1078
00:42:37,160 --> 00:42:39,000
Speaker 6: on your business. That's kind of what I think.

1079
00:42:39,239 --> 00:42:42,320
Speaker 3: I agree, I agree, I understand you're if you can't

1080
00:42:42,880 --> 00:42:46,760
Speaker 3: find it in your heart or financially, like you can't

1081
00:42:46,880 --> 00:42:50,160
Speaker 3: not get paid for this, which you already agreed to

1082
00:42:50,200 --> 00:42:52,040
Speaker 3: do it without getting paid, so now you're adding a

1083
00:42:52,040 --> 00:42:53,239
Speaker 3: price for not talking to her.

1084
00:42:53,320 --> 00:42:54,960
Speaker 1: It's the same thing that rachels talking about.

1085
00:42:55,000 --> 00:42:57,200
Speaker 3: It's like tip for tap, like you should give them

1086
00:42:57,200 --> 00:42:59,279
Speaker 3: to her, and if if you don't feel comfortable you

1087
00:42:59,280 --> 00:43:01,560
Speaker 3: can't do that, then wait until she contacts you for

1088
00:43:01,640 --> 00:43:05,120
Speaker 3: them and then give them to her. But you shouldn't

1089
00:43:05,680 --> 00:43:07,040
Speaker 3: contact her and reach.

1090
00:43:06,880 --> 00:43:08,160
Speaker 1: Out to her at all.

1091
00:43:08,200 --> 00:43:10,320
Speaker 4: Class it's with a dropbox link with all her wedding

1092
00:43:10,320 --> 00:43:13,239
Speaker 4: photos like that I think is the only communication here.

1093
00:43:13,480 --> 00:43:13,760
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1094
00:43:13,840 --> 00:43:16,360
Speaker 3: Yeah, I wouldn't really be in the business of charging.

1095
00:43:16,400 --> 00:43:17,719
Speaker 3: I mean, you got to walk out of this as

1096
00:43:17,760 --> 00:43:20,040
Speaker 3: a bigger if it really was only a mistake that

1097
00:43:20,080 --> 00:43:23,600
Speaker 3: you made and you were completely provoked. Then your behavior

1098
00:43:23,640 --> 00:43:26,080
Speaker 3: in this instant should be to show grace so that

1099
00:43:26,120 --> 00:43:30,400
Speaker 3: she can detect or you know, infer what really happened

1100
00:43:30,400 --> 00:43:32,600
Speaker 3: in the long run. You know, you're just like shutting

1101
00:43:32,600 --> 00:43:35,239
Speaker 3: the door on the friendship another way by saying, hey,

1102
00:43:35,239 --> 00:43:38,360
Speaker 3: you owe me money for this, so yeah, release the

1103
00:43:38,360 --> 00:43:40,399
Speaker 3: wedding count. This isn't the advice you wanted to hear,

1104
00:43:40,480 --> 00:43:42,840
Speaker 3: but skip it. And when you have lists that long

1105
00:43:43,400 --> 00:43:47,000
Speaker 3: of what people have done to wrong you, it's also

1106
00:43:47,280 --> 00:43:49,840
Speaker 3: time to like take a look at yourself. You can't

1107
00:43:49,920 --> 00:43:52,520
Speaker 3: just keep score all the time. It doesn't work that way.

1108
00:43:53,040 --> 00:43:53,239
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1109
00:43:53,320 --> 00:43:55,560
Speaker 6: No, I mean this is the kind of stuff that

1110
00:43:55,640 --> 00:43:59,000
Speaker 6: I do believe. Although I love the chapter email where

1111
00:43:59,040 --> 00:44:01,600
Speaker 6: you kind of like, you know, drunkenly said some things.

1112
00:44:02,160 --> 00:44:06,120
Speaker 6: That was the most fun part for me personally. I

1113
00:44:06,200 --> 00:44:08,760
Speaker 6: like when she hits the fan in a fun, loving tale. Sure,

1114
00:44:08,800 --> 00:44:12,440
Speaker 6: but I think that that might be maybe connected to

1115
00:44:12,520 --> 00:44:15,240
Speaker 6: holding on to all of this like resentment, all this talent,

1116
00:44:15,400 --> 00:44:16,880
Speaker 6: Like you don't want to be that tightly wound that

1117
00:44:16,880 --> 00:44:19,320
Speaker 6: you're crunching numbers every time you're hanging out with the friends.

1118
00:44:19,400 --> 00:44:21,319
Speaker 1: No, you know, no, not at all. I would let

1119
00:44:21,400 --> 00:44:21,759
Speaker 1: it go.

1120
00:44:22,080 --> 00:44:25,200
Speaker 3: Let it go everyone, Let it go. Rachel Feinstein, what

1121
00:44:25,320 --> 00:44:28,480
Speaker 3: a dream, What a dream, jew you've been Thank you guys.

1122
00:44:28,480 --> 00:44:30,080
Speaker 3: It's been nice to spend time with you. I look

1123
00:44:30,120 --> 00:44:31,960
Speaker 3: forward to spending more time with you in Hawaii.

1124
00:44:32,120 --> 00:44:32,680
Speaker 1: I can't wait.

1125
00:44:32,719 --> 00:44:35,120
Speaker 3: And everyone else who's listening that we'll see in Hawaii.

1126
00:44:35,440 --> 00:44:37,359
Speaker 3: So I'll see you in your thong and you'll see

1127
00:44:37,360 --> 00:44:39,000
Speaker 3: me in your in your thong as well.

1128
00:44:39,760 --> 00:44:41,600
Speaker 1: Thank you guys so much. This was so fun. I

1129
00:44:41,680 --> 00:44:43,759
Speaker 1: had the best time. Bye, Rachel. Congrats.

1130
00:44:44,440 --> 00:44:47,840
Speaker 3: Okay, So upcoming shows that I have you guys, Auckland,

1131
00:44:47,920 --> 00:44:53,640
Speaker 3: New Zealand, Wellington, New Zealand, Melbourne, Australia, Brisbane and Australia, Sydney, Australia.

1132
00:44:53,680 --> 00:44:55,680
Speaker 3: We've added second shows to places that have sold out

1133
00:44:55,680 --> 00:44:58,440
Speaker 3: the first and then I'm gonna be in Hawaii on Maui, Ka,

1134
00:44:58,520 --> 00:45:02,560
Speaker 3: Huluey and Honolulu. I will be there in July. Also

1135
00:45:02,600 --> 00:45:05,560
Speaker 3: in July, I'm coming to Niagara Falls on July twenty seventh.

1136
00:45:05,600 --> 00:45:08,160
Speaker 3: I'm coming to Hollywood, Florida for my only show in

1137
00:45:08,200 --> 00:45:11,480
Speaker 3: Florida on July twenty eighth. I'll be in Auburn, Washington

1138
00:45:11,640 --> 00:45:14,400
Speaker 3: on August first, and then Santa Rosa, California for my

1139
00:45:14,400 --> 00:45:18,719
Speaker 3: second show August second. August seventeenth is the Santa Barbara Bowl.

1140
00:45:18,800 --> 00:45:20,799
Speaker 3: You do not want to miss that. And then I

1141
00:45:20,880 --> 00:45:26,799
Speaker 3: will be all over Maine, Charlotte, North Carolina, Charleston, South Carolina.

1142
00:45:26,880 --> 00:45:28,960
Speaker 3: I'm coming to Texas. I'm coming to Saint Louis and

1143
00:45:29,000 --> 00:45:31,880
Speaker 3: Kansas City, and then I will be in Las Vegas

1144
00:45:32,040 --> 00:45:35,880
Speaker 3: performing at the Chelsea Theater inside the Cosmopolitan Hotel. My

1145
00:45:35,920 --> 00:45:39,520
Speaker 3: first three dates in Vegas are September first, Labor Day weekend,

1146
00:45:39,520 --> 00:45:43,640
Speaker 3: and then November tewond and November thirtieth. I'm coming to Brooklyn,

1147
00:45:43,680 --> 00:45:47,920
Speaker 3: New York, at the King's Theater on November eighth, and

1148
00:45:48,080 --> 00:45:51,000
Speaker 3: I have tickets on sale throughout the end of the

1149
00:45:51,080 --> 00:45:54,600
Speaker 3: year in December, so if you're in a city like

1150
00:45:54,680 --> 00:45:59,440
Speaker 3: Philadelphia or Bethlehem, or San Diego or New Orleans or Omaha,

1151
00:46:00,080 --> 00:46:01,799
Speaker 3: check Chelsea handler dot com for tickets.

1152
00:46:01,880 --> 00:46:03,120
Speaker 2: Okay, if you'd like.

1153
00:46:03,120 --> 00:46:06,000
Speaker 4: Advice from Chelsea, shoot us an email at Dear Chelsea

1154
00:46:06,080 --> 00:46:08,520
Speaker 4: podcast at gmail dot com and be sure to include

1155
00:46:08,520 --> 00:46:11,879
Speaker 4: your phone number. Dear Chelsea is edited and engineered by

1156
00:46:11,880 --> 00:46:15,080
Speaker 4: Brad Dickert executive producer Catherine Law and be sure to

1157
00:46:15,160 --> 00:46:19,759
Speaker 4: check out our merch at Chelseahandler dot com