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Speaker 1: This may seem like this is for wealthy people, but

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Speaker 1: champagne is at all different prices, and I don't know

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Speaker 1: that many people that like champagne. Do you like champagne? No, okay,

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Speaker 1: you get so hungover. I hear that from a lot

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Speaker 1: of people. You on this podcast. Do you like champagne?

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Speaker 1: Do you drink champagne? I can have the tiniest bit

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Speaker 1: and then I get like immediately, it's like to bubble,

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Speaker 1: and then I'm just like tired, and it's two drunk.

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Speaker 1: So you're not a champagne person. So you're not a

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Speaker 1: champagne and I'm not a champagne person. Paul is not

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Speaker 1: a champagne person. I've never had a friend who's a

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Speaker 1: champagne person. I never hear anybody order champagne anywhere. So

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Speaker 1: I don't know who's drinking all this fucking champagne. I

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Speaker 1: think people are just spraying it on each other, putting

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Speaker 1: it in in rap gangster rapper videos. It's for nightclubs.

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Speaker 1: I don't know who's drinking all the champ Paine. Okay,

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Speaker 1: is tailor here in the house? Tall? Do you drink champagne? Okay?

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Speaker 1: So nobody drinks champagne. Okay, did your mom text your mom,

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Speaker 1: ask your mom drink champagne? Did you drink champagne? They're

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Speaker 1: just gonna say, okay, So nobody drinks champagne and everybody

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Speaker 1: thinks that makes them hung over. That's I've just done

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Speaker 1: a focus group, okay, and most people don't drink champagne,

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Speaker 1: and a lot of people can makes them hangover. So

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Speaker 1: how come every time something fucking goes wrong somewhere they

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Speaker 1: send you goddamn champagne. So you get to a hotel, welcome,

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Speaker 1: here's a bottle champagne. Okay, thank you. What do I

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Speaker 1: do now? Am I flying on a right fucking Gulf stream?

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Speaker 1: So now it's gonna stay here. You're gonna give it

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Speaker 1: to the next room. It's just just one. It's the

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Speaker 1: same bottle of champagne going around the world, So that

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Speaker 1: bottle is going to stay in that room. I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: now have to charter a plane because I don't like

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Speaker 1: to waste, so I'm gonna have to charter a plane

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Speaker 1: for that cheap bottle champagne to put in my suitcase.

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Speaker 1: So then something goes wrong a restaurant, something's wrong, We're

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Speaker 1: just gonna send you over a bottle champagne. You sit down,

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Speaker 1: Let's send them a bottle champagne. You got engage, Send

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Speaker 1: them a bottle champagne. Something happened wrong. A Karen walks

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Speaker 1: in and complains about the hotel. Just send a glass

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Speaker 1: bottle champagne to their room. You did great welcome, you're

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Speaker 1: doing speaking. Send the bottle champagne. Why we don't want

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Speaker 1: the fucking champagne. Nobody wants a fucking champagne. Everybody gets

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Speaker 1: to the champagne. Nobody's drinking the champagne. It's a scam.

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Speaker 1: The champagne is a fucking scam. It's that same bottle

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Speaker 1: going everywhere. I want the cash equivalent of the champagne

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Speaker 1: for the mistake, or a gift card just to fucking

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Speaker 1: a store that sells champagne, because I'm onto you and

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Speaker 1: I understand the scam. I don't want the champagne and

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Speaker 1: want whatever. If you are sorry or welcome me me

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Speaker 1: or the gift or I don't want anything, make me

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Speaker 1: a card, make me pot brownies or rice crispy treats

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Speaker 1: or something and don't put razor blades in them, and

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Speaker 1: I'll take that, or the gift card to old Navy

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Speaker 1: or too Starbucks, or get me a manicure. I don't

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Speaker 1: even get polished, so it doesn't matter to be ten

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Speaker 1: minutes and it cost five dollars. But I don't want

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Speaker 1: the fucking champagne because it's a scam. The bottle of

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Speaker 1: wine is a and too. We get it. Everybody sends

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Speaker 1: bottles to other people, put a ribbon on it, and

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Speaker 1: bring it to somebody fucking else's house because the only

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Speaker 1: reason you're giving it to me unless it's the specific

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Speaker 1: wine that I like, which a lot of people like

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Speaker 1: different kinds of wine, it's presumptuous. I like charde. Do

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Speaker 1: I like chardon ay? Do I like uh san sair?

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Speaker 1: Do I like Sauvignon blanc? Do I like Peanot noir

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Speaker 1: or a Maubec or Cabernet? It's or do I like rose?

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Speaker 1: It's presumptuous? You send me a bottle of red wine

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Speaker 1: to my room? Same problem. Now what the funk am

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Speaker 1: I doing this with this? I'm giving it to the

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Speaker 1: housekeeper so she can, you know, get drunk while cleaning

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Speaker 1: the room. I don't think she likes red wine either.

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Speaker 1: She's a person everybody gives it to like the housekeeper

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Speaker 1: or somebody. And that's also like looking down on like,

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Speaker 1: don't give me the goddamn bottle. Save your money, hotels,

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Speaker 1: don't give me the bottle of wine. Okay, give me

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Speaker 1: some candy, Give me a Hershey's bar, give me a

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Speaker 1: bag of fucking oreos. Give me something I can goddamn use.

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Speaker 1: I don't want champagne. Give me a pencil case, give

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Speaker 1: me anything. I don't want the champagne. I don't want

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Speaker 1: the red wine. I don't want the white wine. You're

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Speaker 1: not allowed to tell me the kind of wine that

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Speaker 1: I want to drink. And I'm not well. I'm in

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Speaker 1: a hotel. That's another scam. I'm at a hotel. You've

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Speaker 1: done everything in this place to make it that I

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Speaker 1: won't be in my room. You have a pool of water,

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Speaker 1: slide a bar, you have a kid's club, you have

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Speaker 1: a disco, you have all this stuff you have and

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Speaker 1: all you can eat buffet, you have all you're all inclusive.

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Speaker 1: You've given me a bottle of wine in my room.

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Speaker 1: That's a scam. I don't want it. I want the

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Speaker 1: money equivalent. If I am engaged, make a mistake, you

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Speaker 1: want to say sorry. Something happens a welcome gift. I

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Speaker 1: don't want them. I want no champagne, wine or anything.

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Speaker 1: You would have to be something like a bottle of

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Speaker 1: tequila that's clear, that's good quality, or that I could

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Speaker 1: at least give to somebody as a gift. But I'm

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Speaker 1: on a vacation, so I can't take it with me.

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Speaker 1: I'm not on a private plane. So give me the

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Speaker 1: cash equivalent. Give me a Starbucks card. Okay, give me

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Speaker 1: something I can really fucking use. It aggravates me every

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Speaker 1: fucking time. And if I bring it to somebody's house,

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Speaker 1: they know I was staying in a hotel and they

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Speaker 1: fucking no. I didn't buy that bottle wine either, so

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Speaker 1: the scam continues. Some people like what's the other one?

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Speaker 1: Like prosecco. I don't know what the funk that is.

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Speaker 1: That's and I used to make it sparkling wine. That's okay,

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Speaker 1: that's a sparkling wine. I don't want it, though, you

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Speaker 1: know when I want that at brunch when I'm celebrating

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Speaker 1: somebody else having a baby, which I never want to

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Speaker 1: do either. So that's how much I want prosecco. Okay,

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Speaker 1: we can go into baby showers and bridle showers too.

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Speaker 1: Not a huge fan. So I want to know. I

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Speaker 1: want to hear hard, cold, hard facts about champagne and

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Speaker 1: who really wants it, and who wants a bottle of

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Speaker 1: wine that you didn't choose red or white in a room,

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Speaker 1: and wouldn't you rather just take they could take the shot,

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Speaker 1: do some market research, give us a bottle of vodka.

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Speaker 1: Someone drinks vodka, or give me a little flight of

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Speaker 1: a cute, little miniature bottle of vodka and tequila or something.

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Speaker 1: But I don't want that. We don't want that. We're

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Speaker 1: gonna buy that. We're gonna buy that. We're gonna buy

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Speaker 1: that a little store, we're in a hotel room. We're

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Speaker 1: gonna save money. We're gonna buy that and make our

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Speaker 1: drinks and the quantities that we want. That's a piss

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Speaker 1: me off kind of move. I don't like. And then

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Speaker 1: you're collecting something else happened tomorrow, some mistake. Now you

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Speaker 1: have two bottles, and you know that's like a hundred dollars,

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Speaker 1: it's focaliko, and you're leaving it there and you're waisted,

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Speaker 1: what do we have to do? What are we gonna

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Speaker 1: do with this? Oh my god, it's such a waste.

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Speaker 1: What do we do with this champagne? Now? What do

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Speaker 1: we do? Give it to the housekeeper? Do we give

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Speaker 1: it to somebody else? Oh, the guy was driving us

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Speaker 1: to the airport, Let's give it to him. What about

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Speaker 1: the guy yesterday he took us on a shark diving adventure.

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Speaker 1: He'd like it. Let's get his name. Let's spend fifty

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Speaker 1: dollars on an uber getting to his fucking house to

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Speaker 1: get it to him. Because I don't like to fucking waste.

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Speaker 1: So who's gonna get taken? Give it to the valet parker,

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Speaker 1: give it to somebody who works here. I'm not giving

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Speaker 1: it back to the manager. He gets free champagne. He

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Speaker 1: works here, he's the one who gives it out. He

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Speaker 1: runs that scam. So who the funk are we giving

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Speaker 1: it to? It's going back in there. It's bullshit. I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna call it next time. Let's just say it. Hi.

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Speaker 1: Google the price on on wine dot com. This champagne is.

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Speaker 1: It's probably host sale. You can easily take it back

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Speaker 1: and take it off my bill, Thank you very fucking much.

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Speaker 1: Disclaimer and I've done it at Christmas time. If it's

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Speaker 1: a very expensive bottle, a vove or dumb or something

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Speaker 1: that someone gave me that's in like a box like

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Speaker 1: they have like special boxes. I saw Paul's mom's house

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Speaker 1: and I'm gonna steal it next year from her guest

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Speaker 1: cottage fridge because it's been in there for three years

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Speaker 1: and now we fucking know why. It's a bottle of

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Speaker 1: click Co. But it's like wrapped. It almost looks like

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Speaker 1: like a mesh cool like sports material. It's like almost

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Speaker 1: like a little like champagne caddy. But it's been there

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Speaker 1: for three years. I'm waiting what it's there for four years.

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Speaker 1: I'm going in and be like, Okay, it's been here

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Speaker 1: for three years. I'm taking it. I'm giving it to

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Speaker 1: somebody as a Christmas gift. So I'll give like if

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Speaker 1: it comes in one of those big elaborate boxes or

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Speaker 1: like it's like a fancy box that like will be

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Speaker 1: decorative on a bar, you know, then it's like a purse.

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Speaker 1: Then it's like a statue. Now it's like a perfume

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Speaker 1: model where it's a decorative. That's my disclaimer. Or if

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Speaker 1: it's the most stunning bottle ever, that's my disclaimer for Christmas.

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Speaker 1: So I'll put a fucking bow on it and give

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Speaker 1: it to somebody else at Christmas. But that's the I'm

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Speaker 1: in on the scam. That's the point. It's all a scam.

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Speaker 1: I'm part of the scam. I'm just moving the ponds.

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Speaker 1: And that's what a pyramid scam is. By the way,

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Speaker 1: a pyramid scam is get people to come into the

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Speaker 1: bottom and just move to try to get out at

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Speaker 1: the top, so they pay fifty dollars and then that

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Speaker 1: group of the bottom one that two goes to the

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Speaker 1: next round and then goes to the top, and the

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Speaker 1: person at the top takes all the money from all

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Speaker 1: the layers. That's the champagne scam. We're just trying to

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Speaker 1: get out of the scam. I just want to get

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Speaker 1: rid of all of my bottles and get out, and

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Speaker 1: I wanted more. I don't want to go back in,

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Speaker 1: so I don't want more champagne bottles. I would like

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Speaker 1: to hear from you if anybody drink champagne, and not

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Speaker 1: because it was sent over to you, not because you

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Speaker 1: want to pop something and make a toast. We can

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Speaker 1: make a toast with anything we want make a toast.

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Speaker 1: I'd rather make a toes a Cyanide Champagne. I hate

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Speaker 1: Champagne and everybody hates Champagne. Today, my guest is Dr Drew,

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Speaker 1: who you probably know from Love Line or Celebrity Rehab

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Speaker 1: or his guest appearances on countless other shows. Did you

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Speaker 1: know that he spent years doing his first radio show

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Speaker 1: for free. He is a passionate man, a kind man,

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Speaker 1: a family man, and somebody to learn from. It is

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Speaker 1: incredible to hear how his instincts have literally shaped his career.

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Speaker 1: I can't wait for you to hear this. Hi, Hey,

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Speaker 1: how you been. I'm okay. Um. I talked to you,

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Speaker 1: I think years ago on your show. I feel like

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Speaker 1: we've been talking for many years, you know what I mean?

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Speaker 1: I feel like we've been crossing paths over and over.

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Speaker 1: How either came on or we're supposed to come onto

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Speaker 1: your talk show back in the day. We're also old.

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Speaker 1: How do you even remember anything? Don't even I just

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Speaker 1: know that I know you? So, Um, where did you

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Speaker 1: grow up? We're starting now, we've been starting. I grew

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Speaker 1: up in Pasadena, California. And uh he actually I was

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Speaker 1: born in Alhambra and lived there a couple of years.

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Speaker 1: And um, I mean, go ahead and ask questions. I'm

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Speaker 1: an open book, but there's a lot of interesting intrigue

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Speaker 1: in my family of origin stuff. Well, I like to

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Speaker 1: get a sense of someone's upbringing, their socioeconomic upbringing, the

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Speaker 1: work ethic that their family did or didn't instill, the

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Speaker 1: sitting down to dinner, what the deal was of your family. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: so my father's parents were refugees from the Ukrainian genocide. Uh.

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Speaker 1: My grandmother used to talk about the bandidos coming in

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Speaker 1: and we never knew whether that was the czarist or

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Speaker 1: the programs or we didn't know who who she was talking.

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Speaker 1: She didn't know who she was talking about. But they

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Speaker 1: knew to get out of there, and they went through Canada,

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Speaker 1: got it, did the whole process of getting sponsors down here,

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Speaker 1: came in through Hartford and up in Chicago, opened a

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Speaker 1: restaurant in time for the depression, and my father was

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Speaker 1: profoundly traumatized by the depression. He definitely depression, Eric kid?

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Speaker 1: And what does that mean? How are those how? How

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Speaker 1: what is a depression? Eric kid? How does that come out?

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Speaker 1: What is that about? Being being penny wise? He would

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Speaker 1: well beyond. So he and his father died when he

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Speaker 1: was twenty one, by that point, he literally had finished

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Speaker 1: medical school already by the age of twenty one. He

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Speaker 1: was like, he felt like his his job to take

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Speaker 1: care of the family and you know, support everybody. But

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Speaker 1: they literally didn't know where their next meal was coming from.

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Speaker 1: During the depression, they were nearly homeless, and that freaked

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Speaker 1: him out. So he was very traumatized around finances. And

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Speaker 1: then that was communicated to me in the following way. Obviously,

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Speaker 1: there was a you know, an ethos about you know,

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Speaker 1: security and getting a profession and you know, having having

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Speaker 1: security blah blah blah blah blah. That was constant. But

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Speaker 1: when I was about two or three years old, my

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Speaker 1: father started uh traumatizing me. So he would literally go

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Speaker 1: regale me with stories about how when he was a

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Speaker 1: kid he had no shoes and had to walk in

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Speaker 1: the snow and blah blah blah blah. And then you know,

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Speaker 1: and so I would grow and need clothing, and his

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Speaker 1: response to what that was, Oh, I see you need

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Speaker 1: new clothes. Okay, all right, well you can get some

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Speaker 1: new clothes, but when you do, tomorrow, I won't be

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Speaker 1: here anymore because you're gonna have to come visit me

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Speaker 1: in the poorhouse. I'll be in the poorhouse. A guilt

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Speaker 1: and anxiety and but a huge elaborate story where I

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Speaker 1: could stand outside and waved to him, but I couldn't

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Speaker 1: talk to him through the window. I was three years old.

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Speaker 1: I believed it completely. That's money noise. So you have

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Speaker 1: money noise, you still have it no matter what, no

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Speaker 1: matter what, I can't get rid of it. It's can't

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Speaker 1: get rid of it. It always Tomorrow's the day. Catastrophe

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Speaker 1: is coming. Catastrophe, catastrophe. Um So, so I have an

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Speaker 1: anxiety disorder. So that says that's not the only stories

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Speaker 1: of my anxiety disorder. But that was one of the

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Speaker 1: things that I was anxious about growing up. And so

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Speaker 1: when it came time to establish my own family, I

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Speaker 1: became a severe workaholic. I mean severe, like I would

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Speaker 1: get up, I would get up at five o'clock in

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Speaker 1: the morning. I would struggle to get home by ten

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Speaker 1: o'clock at night. A weekend off meant an eight hour

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Speaker 1: work day on Saturday and Sunday. Those are my weekends off. Uh.

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Speaker 1: And I did that for years and years and years

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Speaker 1: and years, and it was in one respect wonderful because

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Speaker 1: I took on responsibilities and had jobs that in turn

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Speaker 1: is rarely get I saw everything there was to see

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Speaker 1: on the on the medical and psychiatric landscape. I mean,

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Speaker 1: I took care of and saw everything, and so it

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Speaker 1: informed me medically and in my in terms of my

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Speaker 1: judgment in a profound way. And so that was a

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Speaker 1: very grateful for that. But man, it was brutal, and

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Speaker 1: certainly it's it made everything else seem easy. Everything. I mean,

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Speaker 1: I I can do a fourteen sixty hour day now,

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Speaker 1: doesn't even even flinch't me at all. It's just that

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Speaker 1: that was every day. How does somebody get ahold of it?

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Speaker 1: Because a lot of us are constantly thinking about our

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Speaker 1: bills and well, we owe what we're making. And you

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Speaker 1: bought something and you want it, but then you bought it,

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Speaker 1: and I have to figure out how to can fill

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Speaker 1: the whole, like all that stuff. Any spending that even

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Speaker 1: to this day, particularly about clothing of course that's where

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Speaker 1: my dad really traumatized me, but any spending to this day,

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Speaker 1: I feel not just regret but anxious and overwhelmed. And

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Speaker 1: I have to I have to sort of go into

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Speaker 1: a denial in order to in order to spend. And

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Speaker 1: it's kind of weird. Um. But the main thing for

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Speaker 1: me is I had to have a buffer. I had

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Speaker 1: to have a savings. I had to have that. I

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Speaker 1: could not live without that, the pile a savings. And yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: enough enough that the catastrophe that I imagined every day,

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Speaker 1: would you know cover that? And what about and your

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Speaker 1: with your kids? You have triplets which sounds expensive, and

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Speaker 1: your wife and all that, how does that work at home?

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Speaker 1: It was? That was you know, that was incredible and

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Speaker 1: very stressful and just amazing and um, and I think

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Speaker 1: it's hard for me to tell exactly. It seems like

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Speaker 1: they have three different um experiences. Yeah, my daughter seems

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Speaker 1: very comfortable sort of just being making ends meet and

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Speaker 1: you know, making sure she I mean, she's sensible, she's smart. Um.

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Speaker 1: My other son, one of my sons, who went to

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Speaker 1: law school, is becoming a workaholic right in front of

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Speaker 1: my eyes. And the other one I think has lots

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Speaker 1: of anxiety about these things, but doesn't worry about it

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Speaker 1: so much. She does doesn't doesn't managing, isn't doesn't catastrophize,

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Speaker 1: doesn't catachriphize. Why I did, being a quote unquote expert

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Speaker 1: on so many matters, psychological and addiction and sex and

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Speaker 1: relationships and all these things. What about the pressure for

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Speaker 1: you to have a good relationship, for you to be

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Speaker 1: a good parent, for your kids to not be doing

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Speaker 1: you know, drugs and crazy like? What about that internal

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Speaker 1: that noise? Like? You know, because a matchmaker, if they

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Speaker 1: don't have a husband, they look like a loser, even

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Speaker 1: though a lot of people don't have a husband, but

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Speaker 1: there are matchmakers. Sore supposed to be an expert on that.

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Speaker 1: There's let me tell you a longer story, but start

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Speaker 1: with a shorter comment, which is I really didn't worry

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Speaker 1: about that because I really I know that you're just

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Speaker 1: for You're just a parent, no matter what you know.

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Speaker 1: You're just reduced to parent, no matter what your expertise

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Speaker 1: and everything else. And because I ran a drug treatment

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Speaker 1: center for twenty years my um, I had some very

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Speaker 1: strong sort of ideas about that that just were what

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Speaker 1: they were good or bad. I mean, I I spent

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Speaker 1: a lot of time telling parents of adolescent kids what

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Speaker 1: they should do, and they rarely did it, and the

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Speaker 1: kids died, and so that made me very very rigid

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Speaker 1: and very very clear on things. And I when they

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Speaker 1: are my kids about fourteen. I was like, look, you're

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Speaker 1: gonna try stuff, but trust me, I will bring the

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Speaker 1: hatchet down. I will bring you know if you if

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Speaker 1: you develop a drug habit, I'll make sure you get arrested.

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Speaker 1: I make sure you go to jail. I will create

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Speaker 1: consequences because without the consequences, you will die. And I said,

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Speaker 1: God forbid if you have this disease of addiction. Now,

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Speaker 1: if you're using UM, I want you to know that

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Speaker 1: every adverse event in adolescents, you find alcohol, whether it's

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Speaker 1: fights or on one in pregnancy, or std S or

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Speaker 1: eight on, what is sexual contact, whatever it is, you

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Speaker 1: always found alcohol. So I know you're gonna try to drink,

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Speaker 1: and Okay, good luck. I hope you hope you do

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Speaker 1: well because you know I'll bring the acts down. But

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Speaker 1: God help you if you go to a party where

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Speaker 1: parents are serving you alcohol, because I will show up

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Speaker 1: with the sheriff's I will drag those parents out. I'll

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Speaker 1: be standing on the lawn laughing my ass off. So

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Speaker 1: good luck. So that's what I so. That made them

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Speaker 1: not popular to go to parties. So I had no

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Speaker 1: alternative but to take that position. But but my own,

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Speaker 1: because I really I saw the consequence of parents being

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Speaker 1: friendly and not being being very very clear about substances.

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Speaker 1: And of course my kids did you stuff and they

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Speaker 1: continue to this day. Whatever they're adults, that's on them.

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Speaker 1: But during adolescence, the the consequences are so profound I

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Speaker 1: wasn't willing to take any risk about them. So my

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00:17:46,280 --> 00:17:50,040
Speaker 1: own adolescent story, though, it's kind of interesting. So you know,

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Speaker 1: you you I've already talked about my anxiety sort and stuff.

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Speaker 1: I actually don't have that right now because I went

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Speaker 1: to therapy, and I want people to know the treatment

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Speaker 1: works and my psychological health. I spent many years in

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Speaker 1: therapy and my my psychiatric healthy mental health, my my

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Speaker 1: anxiety sort all that is like in I want I

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Speaker 1: would say cured, even not even in remission, to sort

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Speaker 1: of cured. Uh. And I therapy works, treatment works. I

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Speaker 1: encourage it in the in the strongest terms. It worked

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Speaker 1: for me. I had a bad experience with it, however,

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Speaker 1: when I was an adolescent. I was nineteen. I was

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Speaker 1: at Damer's College in New England, and I developed panic

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Speaker 1: attacks and I didn't know what was going on. I

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Speaker 1: remember sort of wandering into the health clinics and I

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Speaker 1: knew enough to think it was a psychological thing. So

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Speaker 1: I went to the mental health services and they sent

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Speaker 1: me back down to the health clinic. And at the

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Speaker 1: time there was no adolescent health care. There was certainly

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Speaker 1: woefully inadequate mental health services for adolescents. And the doctor

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Speaker 1: at the the student health services for the college was

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Speaker 1: sort of some retired almost farmer, it seemed like to

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Speaker 1: me from the New England area. And I came in

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Speaker 1: there and I was I was so miserable and so uncomfortable,

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Speaker 1: and he looked at me like with disdain when you

385
00:19:05,440 --> 00:19:07,639
Speaker 1: did take long walks in the woods, what's the matter

386
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Speaker 1: with you? And I was like, I happ believe if

387
00:19:11,119 --> 00:19:14,800
Speaker 1: that would work. I tried. It doesn't doesn't work in

388
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Speaker 1: any event. Yeah, I was so poorly handled for a

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Speaker 1: couple of years, frankly, that it made me interested in

390
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Speaker 1: sort of providing information and services to ad lessons. It

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Speaker 1: made me interest in mental health, you know, good mental

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Speaker 1: health services. And I was on the road to be

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Speaker 1: a cardiologist when I was a resident, but somebody offered

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Speaker 1: me a job to moonlight in a psychiatric hospital and

395
00:19:35,960 --> 00:19:38,280
Speaker 1: I found that so interesting, and that's what sent me

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Speaker 1: down the road of spending most of my time in

397
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Speaker 1: a psychiatric hospital after you. Oh so that's the beginning

398
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Speaker 1: of the trajectory. Okay, So first of all, do you

399
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Speaker 1: drink at all? Yeah? I do. I don't have the gene.

400
00:19:48,760 --> 00:19:51,440
Speaker 1: I don't have the gene. I I you know it's

401
00:19:51,480 --> 00:19:53,400
Speaker 1: not good for you, but I use it for sure.

402
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Speaker 1: Do you do you think that it's actually not good

403
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Speaker 1: for you at all? Like, and this sounds crazy, and

404
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Speaker 1: you're a doctor, I don't. I don't believe sleep medication.

405
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Speaker 1: I know it works, but it's I don't like it.

406
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Speaker 1: I don't like the idea of it. I don't like

407
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Speaker 1: the way I feel the next day. And I realized

408
00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:08,600
Speaker 1: that's when I used to go to l A. If

409
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Speaker 1: I took just vodka on the rocks, like not even

410
00:20:11,119 --> 00:20:13,040
Speaker 1: that much, like four or five SIPs, I would fall

411
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Speaker 1: asleep the flight. So so so if I can't sleep,

412
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Speaker 1: I'll drink some vodka and alone, like not as if

413
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Speaker 1: I'm drinking socially, just because it's better than sleeping. Problem

414
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Speaker 1: with that anyway. So I drink alone. This is my therapist.

415
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Speaker 1: So look, I have no issue with that whatsoever, especially

416
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Speaker 1: if it works for you. However, I will say for

417
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Speaker 1: other people listening. The problem with alcohol it is it

418
00:20:35,480 --> 00:20:38,399
Speaker 1: doesn't do somnolence in some people. Actually, the people with

419
00:20:38,480 --> 00:20:41,479
Speaker 1: the gene for alcoholism actually get stimulated by alcohol. They

420
00:20:41,480 --> 00:20:44,200
Speaker 1: tend to go wake up, while the non alcoholic tends

421
00:20:44,240 --> 00:20:47,119
Speaker 1: to go towards sleeps or somnolence. The problem is with

422
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Speaker 1: alcohol after at four hours, it interferes with sleep latency.

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Speaker 1: I agree, So you wake up four hours and can't

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00:20:53,240 --> 00:20:54,919
Speaker 1: go back to sleep, that's sort of what happens. So

425
00:20:55,080 --> 00:20:58,120
Speaker 1: I agree, I I agree, that's so true. But yeah,

426
00:20:58,160 --> 00:21:01,159
Speaker 1: but you don't feel like one drink a couple of

427
00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:03,199
Speaker 1: times a week. You don't feel like that's a problem.

428
00:21:03,280 --> 00:21:05,680
Speaker 1: I don't mean problematic, but not healthy. It's so hard

429
00:21:05,720 --> 00:21:08,080
Speaker 1: to say. Look, I mean the the the the reason

430
00:21:08,160 --> 00:21:11,120
Speaker 1: I say it's not healthy is all that data about

431
00:21:11,160 --> 00:21:13,120
Speaker 1: one glass of wine a day is good for your

432
00:21:13,200 --> 00:21:15,399
Speaker 1: cardiac health, blah blah blah. Yeah, but if you look

433
00:21:15,440 --> 00:21:17,679
Speaker 1: at all cause mortality, the people are drinking wine every

434
00:21:17,760 --> 00:21:21,000
Speaker 1: day die sooner and so. And we know that alcohol

435
00:21:21,000 --> 00:21:23,240
Speaker 1: is a carcinogen, and so what's the threshold for a

436
00:21:23,240 --> 00:21:25,680
Speaker 1: given individual. I I don't know. I'd sooner. I'd love

437
00:21:25,720 --> 00:21:28,040
Speaker 1: to not drink alcohol just like it. If one thing

438
00:21:28,080 --> 00:21:30,560
Speaker 1: that COVID has taught us, people should look very carefully

439
00:21:30,560 --> 00:21:34,200
Speaker 1: at their philosophy of living. I feel very strongly people

440
00:21:34,240 --> 00:21:37,040
Speaker 1: need to live and not freak out about their health

441
00:21:37,080 --> 00:21:40,040
Speaker 1: all the time, and particularly end of life issues should

442
00:21:40,040 --> 00:21:43,240
Speaker 1: be discussed at length. I hope COVID brings that to consciousness.

443
00:21:43,480 --> 00:21:45,119
Speaker 1: In other words, do you ever want to be in

444
00:21:45,119 --> 00:21:46,680
Speaker 1: a nursing home? Do you ever want to be on

445
00:21:46,680 --> 00:21:48,680
Speaker 1: a breathing machine? And all these things should be discussed

446
00:21:48,680 --> 00:21:50,359
Speaker 1: with your having. I never want to be in a

447
00:21:50,480 --> 00:21:53,280
Speaker 1: nursing home. The average life expectancy after admission to a

448
00:21:53,359 --> 00:21:55,960
Speaker 1: nursing home is six months from mail. I do not

449
00:21:56,040 --> 00:21:59,280
Speaker 1: want to go in. Get me pailat of care. That's fine,

450
00:21:59,320 --> 00:22:02,920
Speaker 1: it's all good. Don't string me out indefinitely in suspended

451
00:22:02,920 --> 00:22:06,360
Speaker 1: animation with institutional support. That's insane. Not me. Well, it's

452
00:22:06,359 --> 00:22:08,200
Speaker 1: funny that you say that, because I have a yoga

453
00:22:08,240 --> 00:22:10,760
Speaker 1: teacher that I was saying, God, I just wish I

454
00:22:10,800 --> 00:22:12,640
Speaker 1: would a lot of my friends stopped drinking. I wish

455
00:22:12,720 --> 00:22:14,800
Speaker 1: I just didn't drink at all. And he said, I

456
00:22:14,840 --> 00:22:16,760
Speaker 1: think people. As a yoga teacher, he said, I think

457
00:22:16,760 --> 00:22:19,960
Speaker 1: people are underestimating joy in their life. Like everyone's talking

458
00:22:19,960 --> 00:22:22,600
Speaker 1: about how rigid to be. Let's not do this make

459
00:22:22,640 --> 00:22:24,760
Speaker 1: me I feel guilty. I'm like, oh god, you stop drinking,

460
00:22:24,760 --> 00:22:27,000
Speaker 1: your skin, your eyes? What could I be doing? But

461
00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:29,479
Speaker 1: then you get anxiety, which is worse than than just

462
00:22:29,520 --> 00:22:31,600
Speaker 1: having a drink and not worry about it. Like, so

463
00:22:31,640 --> 00:22:34,280
Speaker 1: it's a balance. I just got back from France and

464
00:22:34,720 --> 00:22:38,640
Speaker 1: they are interested in living over there, God bless them.

465
00:22:38,680 --> 00:22:42,560
Speaker 1: They are gathering and socializing and sell are they just

466
00:22:42,680 --> 00:22:45,280
Speaker 1: into it and in good things in life? And we

467
00:22:45,320 --> 00:22:48,720
Speaker 1: should all be thinking about not the duration of our life,

468
00:22:48,720 --> 00:22:51,720
Speaker 1: but the quality of our life. And really, you know,

469
00:22:51,720 --> 00:22:53,879
Speaker 1: when you get right down to it, it's other people

470
00:22:53,960 --> 00:22:58,479
Speaker 1: that make life meaningful, and not just spending time with them.

471
00:22:58,480 --> 00:23:00,000
Speaker 1: Of course it's very important, but what we can do

472
00:23:00,160 --> 00:23:02,399
Speaker 1: for other people and engagement with other people, it's just

473
00:23:02,920 --> 00:23:05,800
Speaker 1: we don't know what's the matter with us. We've got

474
00:23:05,880 --> 00:23:09,440
Speaker 1: nuts and we've got we've totally gone nuts. Um. So

475
00:23:09,760 --> 00:23:13,119
Speaker 1: your trajectory started in that regard. But how does fame

476
00:23:13,200 --> 00:23:15,280
Speaker 1: come into it? And what does fame mean to you?

477
00:23:15,400 --> 00:23:16,840
Speaker 1: Do you do you? Do you hate it? Do you

478
00:23:16,880 --> 00:23:18,600
Speaker 1: secretly like it? Do you iss you had more. Do

479
00:23:18,600 --> 00:23:20,760
Speaker 1: you wish you had less? What's your relationship to fame?

480
00:23:21,600 --> 00:23:25,000
Speaker 1: I like it. It was an accident's complete accident. I

481
00:23:25,080 --> 00:23:31,560
Speaker 1: started doing a weekly radio show in n four primarily

482
00:23:31,640 --> 00:23:35,080
Speaker 1: because one Anthony Faucci. I was deep in the AIDS epidemic.

483
00:23:35,080 --> 00:23:37,000
Speaker 1: I was taking care of AIDS patient's hand over fist

484
00:23:37,160 --> 00:23:40,240
Speaker 1: and Anthony Faucci kept telling us young guys, we got

485
00:23:40,240 --> 00:23:42,320
Speaker 1: to educate people who got to change the behavior of

486
00:23:42,480 --> 00:23:45,040
Speaker 1: young people need to be reached the and I was

487
00:23:45,119 --> 00:23:47,240
Speaker 1: asked to be on a radio show just by accident,

488
00:23:47,640 --> 00:23:50,639
Speaker 1: and I was stunned that no one these these you know,

489
00:23:50,680 --> 00:23:53,040
Speaker 1: there's one of those popular radio stations in Los Angeles.

490
00:23:53,400 --> 00:23:56,199
Speaker 1: None of the audience seemed to have heard about this

491
00:23:56,240 --> 00:23:58,879
Speaker 1: thing called AIDS or what it was, or it was

492
00:23:58,960 --> 00:24:01,080
Speaker 1: unbelievable to me. So I to kind of keep coming back.

493
00:24:01,119 --> 00:24:03,400
Speaker 1: And I came back one night a week from then on,

494
00:24:03,960 --> 00:24:06,159
Speaker 1: thinking I was doing community service. And I did that

495
00:24:06,200 --> 00:24:11,600
Speaker 1: for about ten years and then uh My, the the

496
00:24:11,600 --> 00:24:13,640
Speaker 1: director of the station, decided to put it on five

497
00:24:13,760 --> 00:24:15,879
Speaker 1: nights a week, which was very difficult for me at

498
00:24:15,880 --> 00:24:18,240
Speaker 1: the time because that was a side hustle. Well, I

499
00:24:18,280 --> 00:24:20,200
Speaker 1: wasn't making any money. It was it was completely free,

500
00:24:20,720 --> 00:24:23,080
Speaker 1: and it was just it was just community service. And

501
00:24:23,119 --> 00:24:25,679
Speaker 1: my wife got pregnant with triplets the same week they

502
00:24:25,720 --> 00:24:28,879
Speaker 1: decided to do that non what's called non IVF not

503
00:24:29,480 --> 00:24:33,600
Speaker 1: camp fertility campaign full on and we got pregny with

504
00:24:33,600 --> 00:24:37,239
Speaker 1: triplets and she said, sorry, no more community service. If

505
00:24:37,280 --> 00:24:39,280
Speaker 1: you're not doing diapers, you're out of the house. You're

506
00:24:39,320 --> 00:24:41,840
Speaker 1: you're getting paid. So I went in hat in hand,

507
00:24:41,880 --> 00:24:43,680
Speaker 1: like can I get us out? Can I please get paid?

508
00:24:43,800 --> 00:24:47,600
Speaker 1: Started out of fifty dollars a show, and and that

509
00:24:47,680 --> 00:24:49,960
Speaker 1: was that, and it's sort of one thing led to another.

510
00:24:50,560 --> 00:24:53,680
Speaker 1: There's no blueprint, there was no intent. There was always

511
00:24:53,760 --> 00:24:56,159
Speaker 1: just me kind of exploring things. And you know, all

512
00:24:56,200 --> 00:24:59,119
Speaker 1: of a sudden, some TV producers came along and they're like,

513
00:24:59,119 --> 00:25:01,320
Speaker 1: we're gonna do a TV show. Well, that's interesting, how

514
00:25:01,359 --> 00:25:03,480
Speaker 1: do you do that? What does that even me? What

515
00:25:03,600 --> 00:25:06,399
Speaker 1: you're talking about? But I'm willing to let's try that.

516
00:25:07,119 --> 00:25:10,960
Speaker 1: And one thing, I do another and MTV and then uh,

517
00:25:11,440 --> 00:25:13,359
Speaker 1: it's just it's just I just doors would open and

518
00:25:13,400 --> 00:25:15,920
Speaker 1: I would try to figure out how to make them good,

519
00:25:16,040 --> 00:25:18,199
Speaker 1: you know, how to make these worthwhile, how to make

520
00:25:18,320 --> 00:25:21,240
Speaker 1: make sure the impact move things and what I thought

521
00:25:21,240 --> 00:25:23,600
Speaker 1: was a good direction. So the collision of your father

522
00:25:23,720 --> 00:25:26,879
Speaker 1: saying you need to make money your own work ethic,

523
00:25:27,600 --> 00:25:30,000
Speaker 1: and then the curiosity and wanting to help people all

524
00:25:30,119 --> 00:25:33,640
Speaker 1: just sort of came together converged, and I would even

525
00:25:33,640 --> 00:25:36,560
Speaker 1: say there's another there's another component, which is always really

526
00:25:36,640 --> 00:25:39,560
Speaker 1: enjoyed performing and speaking and being in front of all audiences.

527
00:25:39,600 --> 00:25:42,359
Speaker 1: I like that. I enjoy that. I one of my

528
00:25:42,440 --> 00:25:45,160
Speaker 1: favorite things now is to move an audience. I can

529
00:25:45,320 --> 00:25:48,600
Speaker 1: like speaking in a room and taking a people and

530
00:25:48,640 --> 00:25:51,800
Speaker 1: moving them and you know, helping them have an experience.

531
00:25:51,800 --> 00:26:07,080
Speaker 1: That that's deeply meaningful to me too. Do you, um

532
00:26:07,359 --> 00:26:10,080
Speaker 1: get recognized every day every time you're out? Is it

533
00:26:10,119 --> 00:26:13,000
Speaker 1: is a lot. It is always delightful because I like

534
00:26:13,160 --> 00:26:17,000
Speaker 1: people and I'm I'm an introvert, So for me to

535
00:26:17,280 --> 00:26:20,919
Speaker 1: initiate a conversation with people is impossible. I can't do it.

536
00:26:21,440 --> 00:26:23,760
Speaker 1: And so to have somebody walk up and initiate conversation,

537
00:26:23,840 --> 00:26:26,639
Speaker 1: I'm grateful for it, um, But in terms of the

538
00:26:26,720 --> 00:26:29,720
Speaker 1: intrusiveness of it, that that goes up and down depending

539
00:26:29,760 --> 00:26:31,520
Speaker 1: on what I'm doing. But you can have you have

540
00:26:31,560 --> 00:26:33,520
Speaker 1: a good relationship with it, you can go you can

541
00:26:33,560 --> 00:26:35,720
Speaker 1: have a normal life. You're not like assaulted by it

542
00:26:35,800 --> 00:26:38,520
Speaker 1: or anything. It's like, I frankly don't understand people that

543
00:26:38,560 --> 00:26:40,720
Speaker 1: are resentful of it. I don't get it because people

544
00:26:40,720 --> 00:26:44,199
Speaker 1: are always great, although I think these days with the

545
00:26:44,400 --> 00:26:46,320
Speaker 1: with the weird world we live in now, and you know,

546
00:26:46,440 --> 00:26:48,639
Speaker 1: they perceive you to be part of a team or

547
00:26:48,680 --> 00:26:50,560
Speaker 1: not part of a team, which I am not. I'm

548
00:26:50,600 --> 00:26:54,240
Speaker 1: completely independent, and so you'll get weird stuff that way now,

549
00:26:54,280 --> 00:26:57,560
Speaker 1: which is a little bit a new thing. But other

550
00:26:57,600 --> 00:27:00,440
Speaker 1: than that, no problem. You know, my day you didn't

551
00:27:00,440 --> 00:27:02,200
Speaker 1: take a picture of yourself and be like, look how

552
00:27:02,240 --> 00:27:04,040
Speaker 1: good I look. Look at me doing this, look at

553
00:27:04,040 --> 00:27:06,840
Speaker 1: me doing that? Like forgetting even social media about posting

554
00:27:06,840 --> 00:27:09,760
Speaker 1: your food. But I just mean, like, this is my

555
00:27:09,880 --> 00:27:12,720
Speaker 1: great life. I'm so rich. I bought this thing, you know,

556
00:27:12,840 --> 00:27:15,159
Speaker 1: and I I swear on everything I hope to be.

557
00:27:15,240 --> 00:27:17,359
Speaker 1: I don't like doing social media. I find it to

558
00:27:17,400 --> 00:27:21,320
Speaker 1: be a business necessary evil. But I still always feel

559
00:27:21,320 --> 00:27:23,680
Speaker 1: when someone works on a social media team, oh, we'd

560
00:27:23,680 --> 00:27:25,200
Speaker 1: love to see a picture of you in a bathing suit.

561
00:27:25,240 --> 00:27:27,040
Speaker 1: You know, you skinny girl, and you're in good shape

562
00:27:27,080 --> 00:27:29,960
Speaker 1: and your fifth and I just what about all this,

563
00:27:30,119 --> 00:27:33,760
Speaker 1: what about how unhealthy? It is for young girls to

564
00:27:33,760 --> 00:27:37,000
Speaker 1: see these unrealistic images. What about celebrities portraying their entire

565
00:27:37,080 --> 00:27:40,440
Speaker 1: perfect life and then resenting the fact that we we

566
00:27:40,720 --> 00:27:42,600
Speaker 1: get we get excited when they break up and we

567
00:27:42,640 --> 00:27:44,639
Speaker 1: want all the details, and then they want privacy. What

568
00:27:44,720 --> 00:27:48,800
Speaker 1: about all that to you? Pretty much everything about social

569
00:27:48,840 --> 00:27:54,080
Speaker 1: media disgust me. I'm disgusted by it. I'm disgusted the

570
00:27:54,080 --> 00:27:56,600
Speaker 1: exact same relationship with that you do, which is sort

571
00:27:56,600 --> 00:27:58,440
Speaker 1: of a reality that if you're going to be doing

572
00:27:58,480 --> 00:28:01,440
Speaker 1: things in the media, you require to do it, and

573
00:28:01,720 --> 00:28:05,600
Speaker 1: I would rather not do it. I have I see

574
00:28:05,880 --> 00:28:09,120
Speaker 1: on a regular basis how fake news is created out

575
00:28:09,119 --> 00:28:11,560
Speaker 1: of things I say. I'll say one thing and it

576
00:28:11,600 --> 00:28:14,560
Speaker 1: gets converted into something that's not even related to what

577
00:28:14,600 --> 00:28:16,880
Speaker 1: I said, and then that becomes a story and then

578
00:28:16,920 --> 00:28:20,880
Speaker 1: that's what people react to. It's disgusting, uh, In terms

579
00:28:20,960 --> 00:28:24,800
Speaker 1: of projecting your life out into the world. I mean,

580
00:28:25,520 --> 00:28:28,280
Speaker 1: Mozel took to the people that you know like doing that,

581
00:28:29,400 --> 00:28:33,040
Speaker 1: and I'm when I was sick with covid, TikTok was

582
00:28:33,119 --> 00:28:37,120
Speaker 1: my friend and I really enjoyed. I appreciated that people

583
00:28:37,160 --> 00:28:40,440
Speaker 1: were making content that was interesting. That's different because that's

584
00:28:40,480 --> 00:28:43,440
Speaker 1: expressing yourself in an entertaining way. If done probably I

585
00:28:43,480 --> 00:28:45,760
Speaker 1: find that to be an outlet. I'm not on television now,

586
00:28:45,960 --> 00:28:48,320
Speaker 1: and when I do a skit or that feels like

587
00:28:48,360 --> 00:28:51,520
Speaker 1: you're acting or something because you're actually literally copying. So

588
00:28:51,600 --> 00:28:54,080
Speaker 1: that feels a little different than look at how great

589
00:28:54,120 --> 00:28:55,680
Speaker 1: my life is. So you and I feel the same

590
00:28:55,720 --> 00:28:57,920
Speaker 1: way that there there is such a thing as content

591
00:28:58,000 --> 00:29:01,240
Speaker 1: that is good and entertaining an informative, and I do

592
00:29:01,360 --> 00:29:04,000
Speaker 1: believe that to be true. It's a hard it's a

593
00:29:04,080 --> 00:29:06,760
Speaker 1: hard thing to navigate because you know, getting people to

594
00:29:06,800 --> 00:29:11,520
Speaker 1: watch something and tweet, you know, make something viral usually

595
00:29:11,600 --> 00:29:15,520
Speaker 1: is because it's outrageous or something, and necessarily that useful

596
00:29:15,520 --> 00:29:18,160
Speaker 1: and informative. But be that as it may, there is

597
00:29:18,200 --> 00:29:20,040
Speaker 1: a there is a piece of it that I feel

598
00:29:20,040 --> 00:29:23,239
Speaker 1: good about, um, which is when people try to do

599
00:29:23,320 --> 00:29:26,240
Speaker 1: something meaningful with it. I went down I went down

600
00:29:26,720 --> 00:29:30,000
Speaker 1: rabbit holes when I was sick on you know, history

601
00:29:30,200 --> 00:29:32,720
Speaker 1: and physics, and there's a lot of stuff there's kind

602
00:29:32,720 --> 00:29:35,600
Speaker 1: of interesting, and I really I was really grateful for

603
00:29:35,600 --> 00:29:38,040
Speaker 1: the people that created that stuff. But the average thing

604
00:29:38,040 --> 00:29:40,880
Speaker 1: on Twitter, you know, when I read Twitter every morning

605
00:29:40,920 --> 00:29:44,280
Speaker 1: with like my like half of my I need degreehead

606
00:29:44,320 --> 00:29:46,320
Speaker 1: a version with one eye on to the side. I

607
00:29:46,360 --> 00:29:49,360
Speaker 1: got what horror am I going to encounter today? And

608
00:29:49,520 --> 00:29:52,520
Speaker 1: it really is not good for your soul. It's it's dirty.

609
00:29:52,560 --> 00:29:55,240
Speaker 1: First all, with the exception of relief work, where I've

610
00:29:55,280 --> 00:29:57,640
Speaker 1: literally done probably over a hundred I've done definitely over

611
00:29:57,640 --> 00:30:01,000
Speaker 1: a hundred million dollars and really work worldwide and largely

612
00:30:01,040 --> 00:30:03,720
Speaker 1: because of Twitter and Instagram. So for that reason, it's good.

613
00:30:04,040 --> 00:30:07,200
Speaker 1: That's great. So cancelation is such a big topic, and

614
00:30:07,280 --> 00:30:10,120
Speaker 1: I recently was saying that I feel that people who

615
00:30:10,280 --> 00:30:13,239
Speaker 1: are I feel that the people who are falling the

616
00:30:13,240 --> 00:30:17,719
Speaker 1: hardest are the people that are projecting perfection or goodness

617
00:30:17,880 --> 00:30:21,200
Speaker 1: or I'm so rich. That's interesting. Those are the people

618
00:30:21,200 --> 00:30:24,320
Speaker 1: that it's it's it's the worse for because they're just

619
00:30:24,760 --> 00:30:27,239
Speaker 1: you just want to pull it down because you know

620
00:30:27,280 --> 00:30:28,800
Speaker 1: that it's been such a bag of bullshit. So I

621
00:30:28,840 --> 00:30:31,840
Speaker 1: wonder what you think about that. Well, I think that's

622
00:30:31,840 --> 00:30:35,080
Speaker 1: a really interesting construct. I know, I have never had

623
00:30:35,160 --> 00:30:37,840
Speaker 1: any other intent and media other than to do good

624
00:30:37,880 --> 00:30:39,840
Speaker 1: and to make a difference in a positive direction. That

625
00:30:39,960 --> 00:30:42,400
Speaker 1: is my Otherwise, I can't even imagine being in media

626
00:30:42,400 --> 00:30:45,360
Speaker 1: if or just because it would Hey, it's me empty

627
00:30:45,480 --> 00:30:48,880
Speaker 1: empty and you know, um so when I get canceled,

628
00:30:48,920 --> 00:30:50,800
Speaker 1: I guess that's where it comes from. But I get

629
00:30:50,800 --> 00:30:53,400
Speaker 1: it on a regular basis, and it's always it's always

630
00:30:53,440 --> 00:30:56,560
Speaker 1: bewildering and astonishing to me. And it also it also

631
00:30:56,960 --> 00:31:00,800
Speaker 1: um it when when people come after me, they always

632
00:31:01,320 --> 00:31:04,800
Speaker 1: project sinister intent onto me, which is some of the

633
00:31:04,840 --> 00:31:07,680
Speaker 1: most horrible feeling. Like one of the weird fantasies I

634
00:31:07,720 --> 00:31:09,440
Speaker 1: had growing up was I hated the idea of being

635
00:31:09,440 --> 00:31:12,240
Speaker 1: accused of something I hadn't committed. And now I'm getting

636
00:31:12,320 --> 00:31:14,800
Speaker 1: used to that on a daily basis. That's that's all.

637
00:31:14,880 --> 00:31:17,600
Speaker 1: They're always wrong. They're a million miles off who I am,

638
00:31:17,760 --> 00:31:20,120
Speaker 1: what my intent is, and yet that goes down as

639
00:31:20,160 --> 00:31:23,000
Speaker 1: the reality. But don't you think that when you are

640
00:31:23,080 --> 00:31:25,880
Speaker 1: on the edge and almost in trouble, are like, you know,

641
00:31:25,880 --> 00:31:28,800
Speaker 1: on the brink of cancelation for something, that that sort

642
00:31:28,840 --> 00:31:31,200
Speaker 1: of makes you stronger because you're you figure out how

643
00:31:31,240 --> 00:31:33,400
Speaker 1: to navigate things, and like you're not holding the steering

644
00:31:33,400 --> 00:31:36,120
Speaker 1: wheel so tight that you're white knuckling, but you don't

645
00:31:36,160 --> 00:31:38,400
Speaker 1: let go. You're kind of navigating the car and that

646
00:31:38,440 --> 00:31:40,760
Speaker 1: makes you more strong and resilient as a business person,

647
00:31:40,800 --> 00:31:45,640
Speaker 1: as a doctor. I think that's an interesting idea because

648
00:31:45,680 --> 00:31:49,080
Speaker 1: I've been through so many ship storms and they've all

649
00:31:49,120 --> 00:31:51,360
Speaker 1: been so far off. The truth is just amazing to me.

650
00:31:51,880 --> 00:31:56,640
Speaker 1: Um It it still leaves a residual. Well, it teaches

651
00:31:56,680 --> 00:31:58,160
Speaker 1: you how to keep going right, It teaches you how

652
00:31:58,200 --> 00:32:01,000
Speaker 1: to keep going through adversity into you know, keep your

653
00:32:01,080 --> 00:32:03,520
Speaker 1: clear on what your intent is and clear on your

654
00:32:03,560 --> 00:32:05,480
Speaker 1: you know, we have to constantly update your priors. You

655
00:32:05,520 --> 00:32:07,240
Speaker 1: have to make sure you're in the right zone and

656
00:32:07,320 --> 00:32:09,800
Speaker 1: you're clear and what you're doing, and you're being honest.

657
00:32:09,880 --> 00:32:13,560
Speaker 1: They're really honest and forthcoming. But it still leaves, uh,

658
00:32:14,040 --> 00:32:16,080
Speaker 1: you know, leaves a residual that I don't like. And

659
00:32:16,120 --> 00:32:19,000
Speaker 1: so maybe one day that kind of goes away with

660
00:32:19,160 --> 00:32:22,160
Speaker 1: enough building and enough progress. I guess. Uh. So it

661
00:32:22,160 --> 00:32:25,680
Speaker 1: does make you resilient. It does make you understand consistency

662
00:32:25,680 --> 00:32:29,000
Speaker 1: and movement and pushing forward and uh, you know, knowing

663
00:32:29,040 --> 00:32:31,280
Speaker 1: where your north stars are and being clear about who

664
00:32:31,320 --> 00:32:33,080
Speaker 1: you are and what you what your intent is. So

665
00:32:33,120 --> 00:32:35,040
Speaker 1: I guess that's good. I tell people, and I think

666
00:32:35,040 --> 00:32:39,080
Speaker 1: it's very um comforting that my success is because of

667
00:32:39,120 --> 00:32:41,600
Speaker 1: old school hard work. I mean, I'm I'm I'm smart,

668
00:32:41,640 --> 00:32:44,960
Speaker 1: I'm nimble, I'm i'm I'm a chess player. But most

669
00:32:45,000 --> 00:32:47,440
Speaker 1: of it's like I will work harder than anyone I

670
00:32:48,280 --> 00:32:50,600
Speaker 1: you know, nothing can get me down. I get down,

671
00:32:50,600 --> 00:32:52,440
Speaker 1: I get right back up. So I feel that that

672
00:32:52,840 --> 00:32:55,920
Speaker 1: is hopeful in a world of filtering and bullshit for

673
00:32:55,960 --> 00:32:57,840
Speaker 1: people to realize there is all of that. And that's

674
00:32:57,840 --> 00:33:00,760
Speaker 1: all the shiny objects and the makeup, but the frosting,

675
00:33:00,840 --> 00:33:03,680
Speaker 1: but the cake is the work. I'm a with you

676
00:33:03,800 --> 00:33:08,520
Speaker 1: that that is a necessary requisite I I and not

677
00:33:08,600 --> 00:33:12,600
Speaker 1: only is it requisite to moving forward and succeeding, it's

678
00:33:12,640 --> 00:33:15,000
Speaker 1: an important part of it. You know, you have to.

679
00:33:15,080 --> 00:33:19,280
Speaker 1: It's what makes some of the successes feel good. You

680
00:33:19,320 --> 00:33:22,400
Speaker 1: know that you just you really worked. So, I mean,

681
00:33:22,400 --> 00:33:25,120
Speaker 1: I my my work is I mean the amount of

682
00:33:25,800 --> 00:33:27,680
Speaker 1: stuff I put in. My wife has just come to it.

683
00:33:27,680 --> 00:33:30,080
Speaker 1: She's wanting around here right now. Just come to accept

684
00:33:30,080 --> 00:33:32,160
Speaker 1: it because she just goes, oh yeah, Drew's alcoholic and

685
00:33:32,600 --> 00:33:36,120
Speaker 1: filling them so and and believe me, I'm through therapy

686
00:33:36,160 --> 00:33:38,000
Speaker 1: and whatnot. I'm a lot better than I was. But

687
00:33:38,560 --> 00:33:42,680
Speaker 1: I do believe that that's a thing. However, people being

688
00:33:42,720 --> 00:33:44,720
Speaker 1: critical of you and I saying that would say, well,

689
00:33:44,840 --> 00:33:47,520
Speaker 1: you're two white people, you both came from a certain background,

690
00:33:47,560 --> 00:33:50,280
Speaker 1: you had education, you're you're in a position to do that,

691
00:33:50,600 --> 00:33:53,680
Speaker 1: which is true. However, lots of people are in that

692
00:33:53,800 --> 00:33:56,960
Speaker 1: position and and don't do this and aren't success. You

693
00:33:57,000 --> 00:34:00,960
Speaker 1: don't want to be um. But but that it is,

694
00:34:01,440 --> 00:34:04,560
Speaker 1: that that piece is critical. It is a critical piece.

695
00:34:04,640 --> 00:34:07,200
Speaker 1: And yeah, I'm grateful that for the things that set

696
00:34:07,240 --> 00:34:08,920
Speaker 1: me up. I really am grateful. I don't take it

697
00:34:08,960 --> 00:34:13,360
Speaker 1: for granted at all. But I could have very easily languished.

698
00:34:13,640 --> 00:34:15,200
Speaker 1: I almost did. I would say, you know, when I

699
00:34:15,320 --> 00:34:17,320
Speaker 1: was trying to decide what direction, it's very hard for

700
00:34:17,360 --> 00:34:19,200
Speaker 1: me to make a choice. And I had lots of

701
00:34:19,280 --> 00:34:22,040
Speaker 1: you know, I was contemplating becoming an opera singer at

702
00:34:22,080 --> 00:34:23,680
Speaker 1: one point. I mean I had lots of things I

703
00:34:23,719 --> 00:34:27,440
Speaker 1: would I was by choices when I was like night

704
00:34:27,640 --> 00:34:30,000
Speaker 1: is Partable, I depressure and anxiety and stuff I was

705
00:34:30,040 --> 00:34:32,640
Speaker 1: going through at that time. For me, one of the

706
00:34:32,960 --> 00:34:35,000
Speaker 1: skill sets that I have found to be the most

707
00:34:35,880 --> 00:34:38,640
Speaker 1: in addition to hard work and proper training and actually

708
00:34:38,719 --> 00:34:41,920
Speaker 1: having a skill that's worthwhile and really developing that skill,

709
00:34:42,640 --> 00:34:46,880
Speaker 1: but being able to synthesize your talents, you know what

710
00:34:46,960 --> 00:34:49,239
Speaker 1: I mean, to pull in everything that you have and

711
00:34:49,440 --> 00:34:53,440
Speaker 1: and deploy them in complex ways. I think that's something

712
00:34:53,480 --> 00:34:55,880
Speaker 1: people don't talk about very much. You mean, the recipe

713
00:34:55,960 --> 00:34:58,279
Speaker 1: putting it all all the ingredients together. I mean I

714
00:34:58,360 --> 00:35:01,439
Speaker 1: mentioned I mentioned that I liked speaking to audiences. Well,

715
00:35:01,640 --> 00:35:04,440
Speaker 1: that's what motivated me to kind of go, oh, radio,

716
00:35:04,520 --> 00:35:06,560
Speaker 1: that'd be interesting. I kind of might enjoy that, and

717
00:35:06,840 --> 00:35:08,880
Speaker 1: not going oh no, no, I'm a doctor. I won't

718
00:35:08,920 --> 00:35:11,319
Speaker 1: do that, that's beneath me. I was willing to sort

719
00:35:11,360 --> 00:35:14,520
Speaker 1: of integrate these things, and not only that, another piece

720
00:35:14,600 --> 00:35:17,000
Speaker 1: that that for your audience they might appreciate. I was

721
00:35:17,080 --> 00:35:20,160
Speaker 1: willing to go into environments that I shouldn't have been

722
00:35:20,239 --> 00:35:23,080
Speaker 1: in in order to reach people. If I meant that

723
00:35:23,120 --> 00:35:25,920
Speaker 1: I could do something good, like having a young doctor

724
00:35:26,080 --> 00:35:29,520
Speaker 1: on a rock radio station that was outrageous. I was

725
00:35:29,600 --> 00:35:32,879
Speaker 1: outrageous and and and I was twenty five years old,

726
00:35:32,920 --> 00:35:35,640
Speaker 1: and I thought, that doesn't seem outrageous to me. And

727
00:35:35,719 --> 00:35:38,399
Speaker 1: so as a result, you know, also, there's another piece

728
00:35:38,480 --> 00:35:40,719
Speaker 1: in there for your audience, which is trust your instincts,

729
00:35:41,000 --> 00:35:44,239
Speaker 1: particularly when you're young. I think young people have incredible

730
00:35:44,280 --> 00:35:47,759
Speaker 1: instincts and they're constantly judged and sort of we we

731
00:35:48,120 --> 00:35:49,879
Speaker 1: you know, think what they're doing is crazy or wrong

732
00:35:50,040 --> 00:35:52,799
Speaker 1: or whatever. I'm one of those people, and I persevered,

733
00:35:53,080 --> 00:35:56,440
Speaker 1: and it was wrong to judge my instincts at that time. Well,

734
00:35:56,480 --> 00:35:58,680
Speaker 1: it's funny, you just said something that reminded me of

735
00:35:58,719 --> 00:36:00,319
Speaker 1: something that happened to me recently. There was a girl

736
00:36:00,400 --> 00:36:03,720
Speaker 1: working in my organization. And she's good. You just couldn't

737
00:36:03,719 --> 00:36:06,480
Speaker 1: tell she's good. But she was working as an assistant

738
00:36:06,520 --> 00:36:09,279
Speaker 1: and she sort of was crumbling, like she couldn't handle it.

739
00:36:09,440 --> 00:36:11,320
Speaker 1: She wanted to leave. I wanted her to leave. I

740
00:36:11,360 --> 00:36:12,920
Speaker 1: wanted her to quit and to fire her at the

741
00:36:12,960 --> 00:36:14,400
Speaker 1: same time. But I liked her, and I thought she

742
00:36:14,480 --> 00:36:16,640
Speaker 1: was loyal. And I was in between sleep and wake,

743
00:36:16,680 --> 00:36:18,800
Speaker 1: and I said to myself, wait a second, let me

744
00:36:18,960 --> 00:36:21,120
Speaker 1: just take that puzzle piece that keep trying to jam

745
00:36:21,280 --> 00:36:23,640
Speaker 1: over here and create this new position for her where

746
00:36:23,719 --> 00:36:26,319
Speaker 1: she really does just she's the person who interacts with people.

747
00:36:26,400 --> 00:36:29,239
Speaker 1: She's the person who talks to you know, vendors or

748
00:36:29,280 --> 00:36:32,440
Speaker 1: staff or clients and like process. And and I just

749
00:36:32,640 --> 00:36:35,960
Speaker 1: switched up the formula and we literally I would have

750
00:36:36,040 --> 00:36:37,879
Speaker 1: felt badly that she had to leave, and she would

751
00:36:37,880 --> 00:36:40,600
Speaker 1: have felt like a failure and now she's thriving. It's

752
00:36:40,640 --> 00:36:43,040
Speaker 1: about having people be in the best position to thrive.

753
00:36:43,160 --> 00:36:45,680
Speaker 1: Someone could seem terrible and be amazing at something else,

754
00:36:45,920 --> 00:36:48,480
Speaker 1: and just like us, I'm terrible at a talk show

755
00:36:48,520 --> 00:36:54,360
Speaker 1: because I don't want to be confined. Yeah, this is

756
00:36:54,400 --> 00:36:56,759
Speaker 1: free though, being like a talk show like coming up

757
00:36:56,800 --> 00:36:59,360
Speaker 1: next and when we get back, I've done that. I

758
00:36:59,440 --> 00:37:01,640
Speaker 1: know what that is. We're gonna as well. So sorry

759
00:37:01,680 --> 00:37:03,600
Speaker 1: for my little monologue, but that just I want you

760
00:37:03,680 --> 00:37:05,640
Speaker 1: reminded me of that. No, listen, there are two very

761
00:37:05,719 --> 00:37:08,480
Speaker 1: important messages I think embedded in what you just said.

762
00:37:08,880 --> 00:37:12,840
Speaker 1: One was a very important story about being a manager,

763
00:37:12,920 --> 00:37:15,080
Speaker 1: about being a good boss. I mean, that was an

764
00:37:15,080 --> 00:37:18,719
Speaker 1: amazing story, management story that I've never heard sort of

765
00:37:19,320 --> 00:37:22,800
Speaker 1: crystallize that way, which is make sure you have create

766
00:37:22,960 --> 00:37:24,960
Speaker 1: the right job for the right people. I mean, that's

767
00:37:25,360 --> 00:37:27,040
Speaker 1: who I mean. Normally we're just I need this, I

768
00:37:27,120 --> 00:37:31,080
Speaker 1: need that. I'm gonna cramming this. That's a brilliant insight.

769
00:37:31,200 --> 00:37:32,960
Speaker 1: Number one. And then number two, and this is the

770
00:37:33,000 --> 00:37:36,400
Speaker 1: more difficult part, which is if you're somebody who is struggling,

771
00:37:37,360 --> 00:37:40,200
Speaker 1: there's and this is a this is a hard call,

772
00:37:40,360 --> 00:37:43,279
Speaker 1: right do you just work harder and push through and

773
00:37:43,440 --> 00:37:46,920
Speaker 1: learn resiliency and learn how to you know, thrive in

774
00:37:46,960 --> 00:37:50,360
Speaker 1: an job that doesn't fit you, or do you taken

775
00:37:50,400 --> 00:37:52,800
Speaker 1: an inventory of what you really want to do and

776
00:37:52,920 --> 00:37:55,880
Speaker 1: go quickly look for that thing that fits better with

777
00:37:55,960 --> 00:37:58,320
Speaker 1: who you are. I don't know the answer to that. Frankly,

778
00:37:58,320 --> 00:38:01,920
Speaker 1: I I think each person should. Again, this is where

779
00:38:01,920 --> 00:38:04,320
Speaker 1: the instincts come in. You have to really and instincts

780
00:38:04,320 --> 00:38:06,800
Speaker 1: are hard to hear when you're anxious and you're overwhelmed

781
00:38:06,840 --> 00:38:09,839
Speaker 1: and you've got different priorities in your life. Instincts are

782
00:38:09,920 --> 00:38:12,200
Speaker 1: that that just that voice off in the distance that

783
00:38:12,320 --> 00:38:16,160
Speaker 1: just goes that way, that's right, and just see if

784
00:38:16,200 --> 00:38:18,640
Speaker 1: you can listen to that. But this is good for

785
00:38:19,120 --> 00:38:22,719
Speaker 1: employers and employees because if they're communicating. As an employee,

786
00:38:22,800 --> 00:38:25,080
Speaker 1: you can go say, Hi, how is this working? Am

787
00:38:25,120 --> 00:38:27,239
Speaker 1: I doing that? You know? This is what I'm good at?

788
00:38:27,280 --> 00:38:29,360
Speaker 1: This what I'm not great at. Be communicative as if

789
00:38:29,360 --> 00:38:31,080
Speaker 1: you're getting into a relationship because you don't want to

790
00:38:31,080 --> 00:38:32,400
Speaker 1: be at the wrong job and you don't want to

791
00:38:32,440 --> 00:38:35,160
Speaker 1: hire someone that you know isn't going to go the distance.

792
00:38:35,200 --> 00:38:37,200
Speaker 1: So to be able to have that back and forth communication,

793
00:38:37,280 --> 00:38:39,719
Speaker 1: just like a relationship about what who I am, who

794
00:38:39,760 --> 00:38:42,040
Speaker 1: I'm not. Everybody's not supposed to be good at everything

795
00:38:42,800 --> 00:38:45,400
Speaker 1: and to be fair, but that I'm learning more and

796
00:38:45,480 --> 00:38:47,160
Speaker 1: more about you as a manager and a boss. I

797
00:38:47,200 --> 00:38:49,320
Speaker 1: mean not every boss wants that right, and so you

798
00:38:49,400 --> 00:38:51,719
Speaker 1: have to kind of assess those things too. Fact true,

799
00:38:52,040 --> 00:38:55,120
Speaker 1: it's challenging, man. And and I look, I feel bad

800
00:38:55,160 --> 00:38:57,600
Speaker 1: for millennials right now. I mean, they are struggling, they're

801
00:38:57,600 --> 00:38:59,080
Speaker 1: trying to find their way of trying to figure out

802
00:38:59,080 --> 00:39:03,000
Speaker 1: their meaning and and there the noise that they live

803
00:39:03,080 --> 00:39:06,640
Speaker 1: with is just unbelievable. It's unbelievable. It's a it's a

804
00:39:06,680 --> 00:39:08,560
Speaker 1: lot of a lot of stimulation going, a lot of

805
00:39:08,640 --> 00:39:12,480
Speaker 1: activation that is terrible. It's so much, it's too much activation.

806
00:39:13,120 --> 00:39:15,800
Speaker 1: Um so what percentage do you think you're lucky or

807
00:39:15,880 --> 00:39:18,640
Speaker 1: you've been lucky? You know that that's an interesting question.

808
00:39:19,000 --> 00:39:24,719
Speaker 1: Luck always an opportunity, you know, luck slash opportunities that

809
00:39:24,800 --> 00:39:30,880
Speaker 1: we're talking about, and uh, the only really lucky break

810
00:39:31,040 --> 00:39:33,239
Speaker 1: I had. Let's see if there are other lucky things.

811
00:39:33,719 --> 00:39:36,040
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm lucky to have been you know, raised

812
00:39:36,080 --> 00:39:38,200
Speaker 1: when I was. I was lucky to have made a

813
00:39:38,280 --> 00:39:42,000
Speaker 1: commitment to go into medical school sort of for that

814
00:39:42,080 --> 00:39:44,279
Speaker 1: sort of fortunate more than lucky that that I made

815
00:39:44,320 --> 00:39:47,839
Speaker 1: a good choice, lucky that the luck was I lived

816
00:39:47,920 --> 00:39:52,319
Speaker 1: next to a radio station and somebody advised somebody brought

817
00:39:52,440 --> 00:39:54,200
Speaker 1: my name up as something that could help with a

818
00:39:54,239 --> 00:39:57,279
Speaker 1: community service show. That was lucky. Now I could have

819
00:39:57,560 --> 00:40:00,279
Speaker 1: very easily gone, what do you taught? What? Feel me

820
00:40:00,320 --> 00:40:03,439
Speaker 1: to do? What I don't? I can't do that. There's

821
00:40:03,440 --> 00:40:05,439
Speaker 1: a million things that could have happened between me having

822
00:40:05,480 --> 00:40:09,560
Speaker 1: that lucky break and and forget not having a radio career,

823
00:40:10,000 --> 00:40:12,440
Speaker 1: not going up there that first night, and kind of

824
00:40:12,560 --> 00:40:17,799
Speaker 1: exploring what's going on, So readiness, ability to explore instincts,

825
00:40:18,360 --> 00:40:20,840
Speaker 1: all those things were on my side. And those are

826
00:40:20,920 --> 00:40:25,880
Speaker 1: not locked, those are those are attributes. And so I

827
00:40:26,000 --> 00:40:28,880
Speaker 1: was able to see this thing when I went up

828
00:40:28,880 --> 00:40:30,560
Speaker 1: there the first night and go, oh my god, I

829
00:40:30,640 --> 00:40:33,399
Speaker 1: need to keep coming back. This is important. These kids

830
00:40:33,440 --> 00:40:36,600
Speaker 1: need to hear about this. Patients are dying hand over

831
00:40:36,719 --> 00:40:41,240
Speaker 1: fist and they don't even know this. It was feeding

832
00:40:41,280 --> 00:40:43,279
Speaker 1: me in terms of speaking to a large group, but

833
00:40:43,360 --> 00:40:45,680
Speaker 1: also it was interesting. I was in this cultural environment

834
00:40:45,719 --> 00:40:47,600
Speaker 1: where I was meeting rock stars every week, and it

835
00:40:47,719 --> 00:40:51,200
Speaker 1: was just fascinating. It was like so different than everything

836
00:40:51,239 --> 00:40:53,560
Speaker 1: else I was doing, and it sort of was a

837
00:40:53,719 --> 00:40:55,640
Speaker 1: great outlet for me at the same time. Well, that

838
00:40:55,800 --> 00:40:58,520
Speaker 1: sounds like luck because you're an introvert, but it doesn't

839
00:40:58,520 --> 00:41:00,160
Speaker 1: mean you don't have a personality and you don't have

840
00:41:00,200 --> 00:41:02,239
Speaker 1: a little bit of action and fun. People confuse those

841
00:41:02,280 --> 00:41:04,520
Speaker 1: two because I'm in a relationship with an introvert, and

842
00:41:04,600 --> 00:41:06,960
Speaker 1: believe it or not, I'm very insular. So even though

843
00:41:07,000 --> 00:41:09,960
Speaker 1: I'm very opinionated and talk a lot, I don't ever

844
00:41:10,080 --> 00:41:14,240
Speaker 1: go out like I literally it's it's it's almost a problem,

845
00:41:14,280 --> 00:41:16,560
Speaker 1: Like I literally don't ever, I don't What is it?

846
00:41:16,640 --> 00:41:19,759
Speaker 1: What is that I just don't. I don't. I make

847
00:41:19,840 --> 00:41:21,319
Speaker 1: the plan and then I start to try to get

848
00:41:21,320 --> 00:41:22,719
Speaker 1: out of the planet. I don't want to go. I'm

849
00:41:22,760 --> 00:41:25,799
Speaker 1: never not in pajamas, I you know, shower before every

850
00:41:25,880 --> 00:41:28,040
Speaker 1: podcast one of these because I just want to feel good.

851
00:41:28,120 --> 00:41:30,160
Speaker 1: But I don't ever put makeup on or go out

852
00:41:30,200 --> 00:41:32,960
Speaker 1: unless I'm being paid. I mean, like never, literally never.

853
00:41:33,320 --> 00:41:35,000
Speaker 1: Is it? Is it just because you want to you

854
00:41:35,160 --> 00:41:38,600
Speaker 1: just like being casual or you it's a hassle to

855
00:41:38,760 --> 00:41:42,480
Speaker 1: interact or too much energy? What is it? I just don't. Yeah.

856
00:41:42,600 --> 00:41:44,800
Speaker 1: Maybe I just don't understand, Like, what's the point I

857
00:41:44,880 --> 00:41:48,440
Speaker 1: could be here? Yeah, unless it's with my daughter. Experiences

858
00:41:48,440 --> 00:41:51,440
Speaker 1: with my daughter and being on for her, I could

859
00:41:51,440 --> 00:41:52,960
Speaker 1: be here. I don't need to be there. Yeah, So

860
00:41:53,040 --> 00:41:55,000
Speaker 1: there's no there there. So it's a big thing for

861
00:41:55,080 --> 00:41:57,000
Speaker 1: me that I just was talking to Paul about, like, okay,

862
00:41:57,280 --> 00:41:59,800
Speaker 1: should we we got invited on this trip? There fifteen

863
00:41:59,840 --> 00:42:02,040
Speaker 1: year older than the ust if I just said this sentence,

864
00:42:02,080 --> 00:42:04,800
Speaker 1: I said, if we can't like socially keep up with

865
00:42:04,880 --> 00:42:07,160
Speaker 1: people that are fifteen years older than us, that we

866
00:42:07,239 --> 00:42:24,520
Speaker 1: have a tra So you are a morcaholic? Will you

867
00:42:24,640 --> 00:42:28,040
Speaker 1: keep you'll just keep going until the music stops? You'll,

868
00:42:28,120 --> 00:42:30,160
Speaker 1: I mean, you don't. You don't seem to need to

869
00:42:30,200 --> 00:42:34,239
Speaker 1: be relevant. You just liked to feed this machine. Yeah.

870
00:42:34,320 --> 00:42:36,360
Speaker 1: I just like to do select to produce stuff. I

871
00:42:36,440 --> 00:42:39,480
Speaker 1: like to make a difference. I I you know, I

872
00:42:39,520 --> 00:42:42,640
Speaker 1: still practice medicine. I can't. I don't see an end

873
00:42:42,719 --> 00:42:46,319
Speaker 1: in that. I think a lot about that all right now.

874
00:42:46,400 --> 00:42:48,640
Speaker 1: By the way, uh So, when I was lying there

875
00:42:48,680 --> 00:42:50,399
Speaker 1: sick with COVID, I had terrible COVID. I was six

876
00:42:50,400 --> 00:42:53,799
Speaker 1: flex three months and I sat there thinking, well, First

877
00:42:53,840 --> 00:42:57,840
Speaker 1: of all, I'm just I'm out, I'm checked out, I'm miserable,

878
00:42:58,080 --> 00:43:00,640
Speaker 1: and the world is fine, So certainly I can check

879
00:43:00,680 --> 00:43:03,040
Speaker 1: out and have fun and the world will be fine too.

880
00:43:03,480 --> 00:43:05,359
Speaker 1: So I immediately thought, we need to travel, we need

881
00:43:05,400 --> 00:43:07,200
Speaker 1: to go do stuff. And so that's sort of the

882
00:43:07,280 --> 00:43:10,160
Speaker 1: mode I'm in right now. And as I get more

883
00:43:10,200 --> 00:43:13,480
Speaker 1: and more into that, I think more and more about, well,

884
00:43:15,040 --> 00:43:18,000
Speaker 1: how much more, how long? What? What's the relevance you know?

885
00:43:18,120 --> 00:43:20,360
Speaker 1: And what the world the way it is? You know,

886
00:43:20,480 --> 00:43:22,960
Speaker 1: old white male. They don't want you around. They really

887
00:43:23,000 --> 00:43:25,239
Speaker 1: would like you to be gone, which is kind of

888
00:43:25,680 --> 00:43:28,239
Speaker 1: which I have to sort of versions of that. One

889
00:43:28,400 --> 00:43:32,080
Speaker 1: is what a that's harsh, and the other version is

890
00:43:32,360 --> 00:43:36,040
Speaker 1: Jesus I have I have a society will lose something.

891
00:43:36,120 --> 00:43:40,000
Speaker 1: I have an experience that is profound that really very

892
00:43:40,040 --> 00:43:42,960
Speaker 1: few physicians even have anymore. I know a lot of

893
00:43:43,040 --> 00:43:47,440
Speaker 1: things instinctively and clinically about the human experience that people

894
00:43:47,480 --> 00:43:50,239
Speaker 1: don't know. They don't have that experience anymore, and I

895
00:43:50,320 --> 00:43:53,879
Speaker 1: need to share that, and the world at large would

896
00:43:53,960 --> 00:43:56,680
Speaker 1: lose something if I just stepped out. I like that.

897
00:43:56,960 --> 00:44:00,200
Speaker 1: I like that. Do people ask about you in this

898
00:44:00,360 --> 00:44:02,640
Speaker 1: way or it's always you talking about other people. Do

899
00:44:02,680 --> 00:44:04,839
Speaker 1: you talk about yourself that often or not? Really? People

900
00:44:04,880 --> 00:44:06,880
Speaker 1: do get interested in Yeah, sure, they get interested in

901
00:44:07,000 --> 00:44:09,319
Speaker 1: what my background is and stuff. And I've got even

902
00:44:09,400 --> 00:44:14,000
Speaker 1: more crazy stuff in my heritage. Um and I don't know.

903
00:44:14,160 --> 00:44:17,719
Speaker 1: I I guess maybe now at this stage people get

904
00:44:17,800 --> 00:44:19,640
Speaker 1: kind of interested in that because I had this happened

905
00:44:19,680 --> 00:44:21,920
Speaker 1: to you with you know, who are you after all?

906
00:44:22,760 --> 00:44:25,520
Speaker 1: So but I've never I've never withheld anything. I mean,

907
00:44:25,560 --> 00:44:29,560
Speaker 1: I'm always wide open. Yeah, well you have. I guess

908
00:44:29,600 --> 00:44:30,919
Speaker 1: you have to be to be able to have people

909
00:44:30,920 --> 00:44:33,839
Speaker 1: to trust you to give their secrets. What about now?

910
00:44:33,920 --> 00:44:37,680
Speaker 1: This is just two more questions. One is successful relationships.

911
00:44:37,680 --> 00:44:40,920
Speaker 1: I talked to a lot of successful people in successful relationships,

912
00:44:41,000 --> 00:44:44,360
Speaker 1: and I've heard from so many different people. The common

913
00:44:44,440 --> 00:44:46,440
Speaker 1: ones that not common, the ones that jump up the

914
00:44:46,480 --> 00:44:48,799
Speaker 1: page for me, is they give each other a long leash.

915
00:44:48,880 --> 00:44:51,080
Speaker 1: They really very much have their own lives. They check

916
00:44:51,120 --> 00:44:52,719
Speaker 1: in with each other during the day at one point,

917
00:44:52,760 --> 00:44:55,040
Speaker 1: but not just like how is the day? Literally how

918
00:44:55,200 --> 00:44:57,880
Speaker 1: are you? How's it going? Or whatever? What what do

919
00:44:58,000 --> 00:45:00,800
Speaker 1: you say? What what are your what are your tools?

920
00:45:01,239 --> 00:45:04,080
Speaker 1: That's all good and important, but there were long periods

921
00:45:04,120 --> 00:45:07,160
Speaker 1: of time where I was so into my workaholism that

922
00:45:07,239 --> 00:45:11,040
Speaker 1: that wasn't happening, and yet we survived it, right, Uh.

923
00:45:11,280 --> 00:45:15,920
Speaker 1: And we're married thirty years together in warm farm or

924
00:45:15,920 --> 00:45:20,440
Speaker 1: another thirty eight years, and still I wake up every

925
00:45:20,520 --> 00:45:24,279
Speaker 1: day excited to be around this person. And there is

926
00:45:24,760 --> 00:45:27,600
Speaker 1: I hope she feels the same way I think she does. Uh.

927
00:45:28,400 --> 00:45:32,239
Speaker 1: And there is something about it. And people don't talk

928
00:45:32,239 --> 00:45:34,919
Speaker 1: about this because it's almost impossible to talk about, which

929
00:45:35,040 --> 00:45:38,800
Speaker 1: is bittedness of the people. You have to be Susan,

930
00:45:38,800 --> 00:45:41,480
Speaker 1: You're still excited to be around me every day. She

931
00:45:41,640 --> 00:45:43,520
Speaker 1: just laughed. So I don't know quite what that means.

932
00:45:43,640 --> 00:45:46,359
Speaker 1: But but Susanne Summers said exactly what you just said.

933
00:45:46,360 --> 00:45:49,200
Speaker 1: Suzanne Summer said the same thing you just said. It's

934
00:45:49,200 --> 00:45:51,880
Speaker 1: about fit, and so did Ian Traeger. He said that

935
00:45:52,000 --> 00:45:55,000
Speaker 1: say that we just started perfectly matched. And it reminds

936
00:45:55,160 --> 00:45:59,200
Speaker 1: me of this is gonna sound weird, but it reminds

937
00:45:59,239 --> 00:46:02,239
Speaker 1: me of recover free from addiction in the sense that

938
00:46:02,400 --> 00:46:05,480
Speaker 1: it's one day at a time. It's like, I am

939
00:46:05,680 --> 00:46:07,759
Speaker 1: just as happy and excited to be around this person

940
00:46:07,880 --> 00:46:10,200
Speaker 1: as I was when we were in our twenties. And

941
00:46:10,280 --> 00:46:12,560
Speaker 1: I'm assuming I'll feel that way. Tomorrow I may not,

942
00:46:13,080 --> 00:46:16,080
Speaker 1: but it's today today, as we counts. So it's one

943
00:46:16,640 --> 00:46:20,000
Speaker 1: day at a time, and you know, trying to be

944
00:46:20,120 --> 00:46:22,880
Speaker 1: forever that that doesn't make sense to me. But today

945
00:46:23,040 --> 00:46:26,160
Speaker 1: I'm excited today, I'm into it. Today. We have great process,

946
00:46:26,200 --> 00:46:28,560
Speaker 1: we have great fun, and I would say that the

947
00:46:28,760 --> 00:46:36,000
Speaker 1: biggest thing we have overcome somehow, uh is in you know,

948
00:46:36,280 --> 00:46:38,400
Speaker 1: fighting so called, which we don't do very much of.

949
00:46:39,120 --> 00:46:41,640
Speaker 1: We we know very clearly that if somebody wins, the

950
00:46:41,719 --> 00:46:44,799
Speaker 1: relationship loses. So we see very we very quickly get

951
00:46:44,840 --> 00:46:47,040
Speaker 1: off stuff We're not We're not interested in being right

952
00:46:47,320 --> 00:46:49,759
Speaker 1: or wrong or better than that. It just just we

953
00:46:49,880 --> 00:46:52,840
Speaker 1: both lose if our relationship loses if if somebody insists

954
00:46:52,880 --> 00:46:55,040
Speaker 1: on being a certain way. So and then last question

955
00:46:55,239 --> 00:46:58,359
Speaker 1: is of your career, not of your relationship, your rose

956
00:46:58,520 --> 00:47:01,000
Speaker 1: and your thorn. Okay, So I'm just gonna go with

957
00:47:01,120 --> 00:47:03,360
Speaker 1: my instincts on this because there I've had lots of

958
00:47:03,640 --> 00:47:06,840
Speaker 1: really interesting high points. I mean, Celebrity Rehab was obviously

959
00:47:06,880 --> 00:47:12,000
Speaker 1: an extraordinary experience, but but for me, the the biggest

960
00:47:12,840 --> 00:47:17,000
Speaker 1: This is gonna sound weird, but um oh gosh, okay,

961
00:47:17,120 --> 00:47:21,960
Speaker 1: I I had I have too high points. One was

962
00:47:22,760 --> 00:47:25,840
Speaker 1: my residency. I loved being a resident. I loved the

963
00:47:25,920 --> 00:47:29,120
Speaker 1: swashbuckling I was a chief resident. I taught general medicine.

964
00:47:29,400 --> 00:47:32,960
Speaker 1: I love that. I love doing celebrity rehab. That was

965
00:47:33,040 --> 00:47:35,880
Speaker 1: an extraordinary experience that we all shared together. That is

966
00:47:35,920 --> 00:47:39,439
Speaker 1: just one of a kind. But in terms of sort

967
00:47:39,480 --> 00:47:42,560
Speaker 1: of the highest, the most sort of the thing that

968
00:47:42,719 --> 00:47:47,839
Speaker 1: jumps out for me was like season two of Love

969
00:47:47,960 --> 00:47:52,040
Speaker 1: Line with me and Adam and Diane far where I

970
00:47:52,200 --> 00:47:54,960
Speaker 1: felt like it was just joy every day and going

971
00:47:55,040 --> 00:47:56,640
Speaker 1: in and doing this thing that it was so far

972
00:47:56,800 --> 00:47:59,719
Speaker 1: removed from anything I imagine I would ever do. It

973
00:47:59,840 --> 00:48:02,800
Speaker 1: was sort of this extraordinary like what the hell what

974
00:48:02,920 --> 00:48:05,719
Speaker 1: am I doing? This is and and and I and I.

975
00:48:06,360 --> 00:48:09,120
Speaker 1: It's funny. I felt connected to every member of our staff,

976
00:48:09,160 --> 00:48:13,520
Speaker 1: every cameraman, every card holder, every makeup person, and when

977
00:48:13,560 --> 00:48:16,080
Speaker 1: that ended, I was shocked like that, but that was

978
00:48:16,120 --> 00:48:18,200
Speaker 1: our family. We were all, we were in love and

979
00:48:18,280 --> 00:48:21,280
Speaker 1: it was you know, And that was my first experience

980
00:48:21,360 --> 00:48:23,720
Speaker 1: with television that it's all just sort of it's here today,

981
00:48:24,000 --> 00:48:26,040
Speaker 1: out tomorrow and everyone scatters and that's it. You ever

982
00:48:26,120 --> 00:48:28,040
Speaker 1: see these people again. That was a shock to me.

983
00:48:28,120 --> 00:48:32,560
Speaker 1: So that was high low uh, what comes to mind?

984
00:48:33,160 --> 00:48:35,920
Speaker 1: You know, these ship storms of people pulled me into

985
00:48:36,880 --> 00:48:39,200
Speaker 1: the most recent one where I was telling people to

986
00:48:39,440 --> 00:48:42,160
Speaker 1: listen to the CDC and let Dr Faucci be or

987
00:48:42,239 --> 00:48:44,800
Speaker 1: north Star and calm down and don't listen to the press.

988
00:48:45,239 --> 00:48:47,920
Speaker 1: That was converted into fake news where I was somehow

989
00:48:48,040 --> 00:48:51,040
Speaker 1: denying COVID and it just became this terrible ship storm

990
00:48:51,080 --> 00:48:54,560
Speaker 1: that I'm still having trouble shaking. Oh, I'm sorry, I'm

991
00:48:54,640 --> 00:48:57,720
Speaker 1: sorry that sucks, but this too, sial pass I suppose.

992
00:48:57,800 --> 00:48:59,600
Speaker 1: And then this was a just bonus question because I

993
00:48:59,600 --> 00:49:02,440
Speaker 1: thought of it while you were talking. Should celebrities be

994
00:49:02,560 --> 00:49:05,640
Speaker 1: with other celebrities or is it to peacocks in the relationship.

995
00:49:05,680 --> 00:49:09,360
Speaker 1: It's too much because it's it's a great question, and

996
00:49:09,680 --> 00:49:13,120
Speaker 1: it's it's certainly evidence suggests that that doesn't work great,

997
00:49:13,960 --> 00:49:16,600
Speaker 1: you know. Uh, And the other thing I worry you

998
00:49:16,680 --> 00:49:19,080
Speaker 1: can maybe comment about this. It seems like whenever reality

999
00:49:19,120 --> 00:49:22,000
Speaker 1: cameras get into a relationship that the ship goes down.

1000
00:49:22,320 --> 00:49:24,000
Speaker 1: I don't know what it is. The only two couple

1001
00:49:24,080 --> 00:49:26,840
Speaker 1: I can point out is Assie and Sharon that survived

1002
00:49:26,880 --> 00:49:29,960
Speaker 1: reality cameras. You know, everybody else has real trouble. Well,

1003
00:49:30,040 --> 00:49:32,680
Speaker 1: There's two parts to it. One is that a lot

1004
00:49:32,760 --> 00:49:37,560
Speaker 1: of times they get into it because things are going bad,

1005
00:49:37,760 --> 00:49:40,680
Speaker 1: like Camille and Kelsey. Kelsey Grahamer kind of gave that

1006
00:49:40,760 --> 00:49:43,439
Speaker 1: to her as like a send off, and that happens sometimes, meaning,

1007
00:49:43,880 --> 00:49:46,920
Speaker 1: you know, I don't know that Yolanda and her husband

1008
00:49:46,960 --> 00:49:49,680
Speaker 1: weren't having some issues before. Like somebody needs to do

1009
00:49:49,840 --> 00:49:52,480
Speaker 1: that to feel something, because if somebody is successful and

1010
00:49:52,600 --> 00:49:56,680
Speaker 1: has some money, I cannot imagine why they would want

1011
00:49:56,760 --> 00:49:59,520
Speaker 1: to enter into that at that low pay grade just

1012
00:49:59,760 --> 00:50:03,959
Speaker 1: for relevance, because that's a nightmare. So I was broke.

1013
00:50:04,040 --> 00:50:05,560
Speaker 1: I had eight thousands to my name when I went

1014
00:50:05,600 --> 00:50:08,160
Speaker 1: on the house, so there was really my rent was,

1015
00:50:08,320 --> 00:50:11,359
Speaker 1: you know, in the two thousands makes sense, It makes yeah.

1016
00:50:11,560 --> 00:50:13,319
Speaker 1: So I don't know. I don't know which comes for us,

1017
00:50:13,360 --> 00:50:15,720
Speaker 1: the chicken of the e um. But this was so interesting.

1018
00:50:15,840 --> 00:50:19,200
Speaker 1: I'm so excited because I just know about all these people,

1019
00:50:19,239 --> 00:50:21,880
Speaker 1: but I just know the headline, and now to actually

1020
00:50:21,880 --> 00:50:24,000
Speaker 1: get to speak to you, it's fascinating and interesting and

1021
00:50:24,040 --> 00:50:26,320
Speaker 1: I'm really grateful for you given me your time, and

1022
00:50:26,400 --> 00:50:29,000
Speaker 1: I appreciate I really appreciate the interview and the time,

1023
00:50:29,120 --> 00:50:32,440
Speaker 1: and more importantly, I hope we by sharing our stories,

1024
00:50:32,480 --> 00:50:35,359
Speaker 1: we're helping other people. I if there's I'd be happy

1025
00:50:35,440 --> 00:50:36,799
Speaker 1: to buy the way if you have any if your

1026
00:50:37,200 --> 00:50:39,960
Speaker 1: world has any follow on questions or I'd actually be

1027
00:50:40,040 --> 00:50:44,080
Speaker 1: interested because I wonder how this is received and in

1028
00:50:44,200 --> 00:50:47,239
Speaker 1: a feedback or refinement of things we're saying. I'm open

1029
00:50:47,320 --> 00:50:51,120
Speaker 1: to it. I love that. Okay production, And there's one

1030
00:50:51,160 --> 00:50:52,880
Speaker 1: of the things I would say for people who I

1031
00:50:53,400 --> 00:50:57,160
Speaker 1: get interviewed occasionally by sort of in this kind of

1032
00:50:57,280 --> 00:51:00,000
Speaker 1: vein by you know, success in business and management stuff,

1033
00:51:00,440 --> 00:51:03,520
Speaker 1: and I and I always I got to a realization

1034
00:51:03,640 --> 00:51:05,600
Speaker 1: that there's one other feature we have not talked about

1035
00:51:05,600 --> 00:51:07,520
Speaker 1: here that I think it's a critical piece of all

1036
00:51:07,600 --> 00:51:11,479
Speaker 1: of this, which is you must care. You must care

1037
00:51:11,680 --> 00:51:14,320
Speaker 1: about what you are doing, whether you're a boss or

1038
00:51:14,320 --> 00:51:17,640
Speaker 1: a manager, or a doctor or going to media. The

1039
00:51:17,760 --> 00:51:22,120
Speaker 1: word care, for me has just developed a bigger meaning.

1040
00:51:22,480 --> 00:51:25,160
Speaker 1: It's interesting Heidegger had that is sort of a central feature.

1041
00:51:25,800 --> 00:51:27,680
Speaker 1: I know Hyder was a Nazi, I got it, but

1042
00:51:28,000 --> 00:51:31,840
Speaker 1: but but his philosophy was caring as a central feature,

1043
00:51:31,880 --> 00:51:34,640
Speaker 1: and it was sort of a technical term. But I

1044
00:51:34,760 --> 00:51:36,520
Speaker 1: have been thinking about it for years since I read

1045
00:51:36,600 --> 00:51:41,240
Speaker 1: his stuff, and I do think that that really caring deeply,

1046
00:51:41,360 --> 00:51:43,760
Speaker 1: and that's usually about other people and about the impact

1047
00:51:43,800 --> 00:51:46,520
Speaker 1: of what you're doing and the quality and all that stuff.

1048
00:51:46,520 --> 00:51:48,600
Speaker 1: I think that's an important word to keep top of mind.

1049
00:51:49,200 --> 00:51:51,359
Speaker 1: I like that, and it's so true. It's simple. It's

1050
00:51:51,400 --> 00:51:53,680
Speaker 1: the simplest things caring, and it makes you have more

1051
00:51:53,760 --> 00:51:56,200
Speaker 1: integrity and be doing things for the right reasons. That's right,

1052
00:51:56,400 --> 00:51:59,520
Speaker 1: exactly right. Oh well, Bethanie. One of the thing I

1053
00:51:59,600 --> 00:52:03,919
Speaker 1: was supposed promote my book, Oh promote, Oh yeah, thanks.

1054
00:52:04,040 --> 00:52:05,719
Speaker 1: I wrote it with my daughter. Was really fun. It's

1055
00:52:05,760 --> 00:52:09,279
Speaker 1: really cool. How old does she? So? What does it mean?

1056
00:52:09,560 --> 00:52:12,239
Speaker 1: It doesn't have to be awkward, it's it's how it's

1057
00:52:12,280 --> 00:52:14,560
Speaker 1: for fourteen to eighteen year old, fourteen to twenty year

1058
00:52:14,560 --> 00:52:19,040
Speaker 1: olds really and how to navigate difficult topics and relationships.

1059
00:52:19,239 --> 00:52:21,680
Speaker 1: It's for parents also to help young people sort of

1060
00:52:21,960 --> 00:52:24,680
Speaker 1: understand these things. We we you know, it sort of

1061
00:52:24,719 --> 00:52:26,799
Speaker 1: starts with sex and drugs and no kind of thing,

1062
00:52:26,880 --> 00:52:29,279
Speaker 1: but really we want we talked about relationships overall and

1063
00:52:29,320 --> 00:52:31,839
Speaker 1: how to make them healthy. Amazing, Have an incredible day

1064
00:52:31,840 --> 00:52:33,680
Speaker 1: and tell your wife, I said alone, thanks matting me

1065
00:52:33,760 --> 00:52:41,960
Speaker 1: talk to him. That was so great. What a great

1066
00:52:42,160 --> 00:52:45,760
Speaker 1: nice man, and I'm interested in his book. It doesn't

1067
00:52:45,880 --> 00:52:47,879
Speaker 1: have to be awkward that he wrote with his daughter.

1068
00:52:48,480 --> 00:52:51,040
Speaker 1: I just love. Can I just tell you the truth.

1069
00:52:51,120 --> 00:52:53,960
Speaker 1: I know Doctor Drew because I didn't show years ago,

1070
00:52:54,080 --> 00:52:56,600
Speaker 1: and obviously I know about love Line, and I know

1071
00:52:56,920 --> 00:53:00,120
Speaker 1: from Celebrity Rehab. I know Dr Drew. Last night, for

1072
00:53:00,239 --> 00:53:02,960
Speaker 1: some reason, I thought I was interviewing Dr phil and

1073
00:53:03,080 --> 00:53:05,200
Speaker 1: then when I started reading last night, I'm like, wait,

1074
00:53:05,239 --> 00:53:07,480
Speaker 1: this isn't Dr Philips Doctor Drew, And I got so

1075
00:53:07,600 --> 00:53:10,680
Speaker 1: excited just to like switch lanes in my mind and

1076
00:53:10,880 --> 00:53:14,600
Speaker 1: hear about Dr Drew. Maybe we will have Dr phill on.

1077
00:53:15,040 --> 00:53:19,520
Speaker 1: But uh, I just was so pleasantly surprised because I

1078
00:53:19,680 --> 00:53:22,319
Speaker 1: know him, but I don't know him. All these people

1079
00:53:22,400 --> 00:53:25,239
Speaker 1: we think we know because we read about them, we

1080
00:53:25,320 --> 00:53:29,200
Speaker 1: see pictures of them, were aware of them as media personalities,

1081
00:53:29,280 --> 00:53:30,879
Speaker 1: but you don't really get a sense of the fact

1082
00:53:30,920 --> 00:53:36,120
Speaker 1: that that person grew up in like a depression era

1083
00:53:36,520 --> 00:53:39,560
Speaker 1: type upbringing and worked so hard and is a legitimate

1084
00:53:39,719 --> 00:53:42,920
Speaker 1: doctor and wants to help people and it's so nice

1085
00:53:43,120 --> 00:53:44,520
Speaker 1: and I don't know. I just thought that was a

1086
00:53:44,640 --> 00:53:49,720
Speaker 1: really surprising, incredible conversation. Thank you so much for listening.

1087
00:53:50,239 --> 00:53:53,480
Speaker 1: Please remember to rate, review, and subscribe. Please ask questions

1088
00:53:53,520 --> 00:53:57,080
Speaker 1: because we're thinking about answering business questions at the beginning

1089
00:53:57,160 --> 00:54:00,160
Speaker 1: of this podcast, because I'm getting so many of them, um,

1090
00:54:00,200 --> 00:54:01,960
Speaker 1: and I want to start answering them. And just thank you,

1091
00:54:02,120 --> 00:54:07,320
Speaker 1: appreciate you. M