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Speaker 1: It's the radio segment that's starting a new reality TV

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Speaker 1: show for billionaires called Bumper Yachts Round One, Bezos versus Buffet.

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Speaker 2: Loser has to buy Venezuela.

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Speaker 3: Oh, why do I want them boys to sink.

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Speaker 2: Bunny? It's laser stories.

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Speaker 1: The segmentary read weird news stories around the globe, just

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Speaker 1: like everyone else does, except we've got a laser.

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Speaker 2: There's other yacht yats.

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Speaker 1: Just don't this first laser story is out of Colorado.

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Speaker 1: You do this in a dugout, No problem. Okay, do

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Speaker 1: it to a random woman on the street.

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Speaker 2: Big problem. Are we talking about spitting here?

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Speaker 3: I thought we were talking about slapping butts.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, there's a serial butt slapper.

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Speaker 1: On the loose, the one I'm thinking Sunflowers.

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Speaker 2: Thinking booty chee.

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Speaker 3: You guys, my daughter in third grade. I got a

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Speaker 3: report from her teacher that she gives a good addible. Everyone.

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Speaker 2: You learned that from You can't do that anywhere, honey.

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Speaker 3: We can't slap the teacher's butt.

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Speaker 2: Teachers.

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Speaker 1: But it all began when a woman in a Denver

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Speaker 1: suburb was out jogging on New Year's Day when the

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Speaker 1: unidentified guy drove up behind her on an e bike

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Speaker 1: and slapped her rear end. It just made you get

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Speaker 1: from that dude, Like, guys, honestly, you get.

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Speaker 3: You get a punchable.

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Speaker 2: Face, Yeah you do. And plus on the e bike

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Speaker 2: he had the extra speed when he made downhill.

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Speaker 3: Is there any chance he could have thought she was

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Speaker 3: someone else?

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Speaker 1: Well, the thing is that goes out the door because

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Speaker 1: a day later he did it again to a different

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Speaker 1: person in the same area. Same area meaning the same

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Speaker 1: part of town. But yeah, on the butt. At least

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Speaker 1: two other incidents have been reported so far. Someone got

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Speaker 1: a shot of him on his e bike, but you

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Speaker 1: can't see his face. Cops are asking people to try

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Speaker 1: and help identify him. Police are saying he could face

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Speaker 1: sexual assault charges.

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Speaker 2: And I know what you're thinking.

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Speaker 1: Jose has been questioned and he admitted to slapping his

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Speaker 1: own button, but no one else.

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Speaker 2: We all know you're too scared to drive an e bikes. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I would have two hands on and there's no way.

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Speaker 2: The search continues.

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Speaker 1: This next lazer story is out of Victoria, Australia. Don't

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Speaker 1: you hate when you're trying to burn down a restaurant

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Speaker 1: and accidentally set your pants on fire, Jeff, that's a

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Speaker 1: bad Tuesday, and it actually happened when an arson attempt

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Speaker 1: went wrong the other night. Police say two individuals got

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Speaker 1: out of a car and attempted to pour flammable liquid

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Speaker 1: on the outside of a fast food joint. Unfortunately for them,

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Speaker 1: the first thing that caught fire was one of the

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Speaker 1: suspects pants pants on fire.

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Speaker 2: Now.

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Speaker 1: CCTV footage shows the individual running around in circles with

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Speaker 1: they're flaming pants until they managed to rip them off.

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Speaker 3: Okay, stop, drop and roll, come on the million one

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Speaker 3: time you finally get to use it.

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Speaker 2: I don't think that works though.

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Speaker 1: If there's actually gasoline, you can't roll away.

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Speaker 2: The gas fires and you probably roll into the gas. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: all right, Jeff.

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Speaker 1: The man was able to get his pants down around

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Speaker 1: one ankle and you can see his bare buns as

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Speaker 1: he runs away, and then butt slapper guy whizz is

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Speaker 1: bye slaps a moment. So it was a lost opportunity

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Speaker 1: for that. So yeah, the two arsonists are still on

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Speaker 1: the loose and police are looking for them.

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Speaker 4: As for the restaurant, do you do the lineup on

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Speaker 4: that one? As for the restaurant, it never caught fire.

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Speaker 4: It was left completely untouched and the cops say they

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Speaker 4: hope the man's burning pants taught him the lesson that

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Speaker 4: he needed.

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Speaker 3: Anyone else feel that anyone who wants to burned out

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Speaker 3: a fast food restaurant must have either worked there or

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Speaker 3: currently works Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, festering this next laser stories out of Food News. Yay,

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Speaker 1: this is interesting. K SEA is set to shake up

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Speaker 1: the fast food scene in a big way. They decided

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Speaker 1: to open up a spinoff restaurant called Saucy.

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Speaker 3: What what the heck is Saucy?

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Speaker 2: Saucy?

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Speaker 1: We do have drawings of what it's supposed to look like, Brook,

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Speaker 1: How would you describe the photos of Saucy.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's got like a fun, punchy like sign and

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Speaker 3: pink all around. I mean it's very trendy, it's very instagrammable.

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Speaker 1: It's given me like nineteen seventies Burger King with Victorious

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Speaker 1: Secret sprinklings.

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Speaker 2: Oh, I can totally see.

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Speaker 3: It as a Victoria's Secret now that you say that, Yeah,

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Speaker 3: that's exactly the pink they use pink.

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Speaker 2: Me on lights all over secrets. Have you been to that?

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Speaker 2: You know the color scheme? You know, we're not We're

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Speaker 2: not gonna get into that.

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Speaker 1: So KFC does say it's a new dining concept that's

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Speaker 1: gonna put chicken tenders at the forefront.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, offering.

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Speaker 1: Them with eleven signature sauces, including Jimmy Cherry Ranch and

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Speaker 1: Smoky Bacon Ranch.

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Speaker 2: Awesome.

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Speaker 1: Diners can customize their experience with over four thousand possible

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Speaker 1: flavor combinations that include tenders, fries, and a buttery toasted

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Speaker 1: Hawaiian roll.

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Speaker 3: At some point, can we just say too many options?

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Speaker 3: I would be standing there forever out of four thousand

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Speaker 3: sauce options.

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Speaker 2: Kind of American? Are you?

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Speaker 3: Oh?

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Speaker 2: You just keep going back tram All.

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Speaker 1: To round it out, Saucy leans into the beverage craze

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Speaker 1: big time, with eleven specialty drinks featuring peach mango lemonade,

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Speaker 1: a hot honey watermelon refresher, and blue raspberry freezes, all.

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Speaker 3: Things that Alexis wants to put vodka into.

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Speaker 1: Let's not forget it's saucy so On a Friday night,

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Speaker 1: they will be hosting Saucy Soires with a live DJ.

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Speaker 2: You know, okay, you're not going again.

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Speaker 3: You don't want a chicken tender party. Actually, if I

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Speaker 3: go there two am, maybe.

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Speaker 1: I personally cannot wait. It opens in Orlando later this year,

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Speaker 1: this next laser story is out of social media central.

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Speaker 1: Does anyone ever say, man, I was in a bad mood,

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Speaker 1: but then I went on social media and suddenly I.

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Speaker 2: Was showered in joy? Yes with TikTok? Yeah, well for you.

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Speaker 1: A new study has found that people are significantly more

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Speaker 1: likely to feel irritable, angry, and annoyed the more that they.

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Speaker 2: Consume online content. Yeah, and they.

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Speaker 1: Don't list our show specifically, but I think we can.

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Speaker 4: Read it yet.

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Speaker 1: Harvard Medical School collected data on how often adults eighteen

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Speaker 1: and older use Instagram, TikTok, Twitter, and Facebook, and then

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Speaker 1: they compared people's social media use to how they scored on.

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Speaker 2: Various mood tests. Oh interesting, and those.

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Speaker 1: Who said they use social media most of the day

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Speaker 1: scored three times higher on the irrebility on the irreability

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Speaker 1: on the irrebility scale.

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Speaker 3: Don't get mad, I've strugno that you can't even produce it.

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Speaker 3: But that's because I was on social media, not because

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Speaker 3: of your failure.

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Speaker 2: Got it. Yeah, you know, I'll be the bunging bag.

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Speaker 2: It's fine.

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Speaker 1: And then they get higher scores than those who never

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Speaker 1: use it.

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Speaker 3: I mean, I believe it when I finally like when

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Speaker 3: I log off during a vacation or something, I feel

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Speaker 3: so much better.

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Speaker 1: Although researchers say it is possible to have a positive

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Speaker 1: experience on there, but the key is to avoid over indulging.

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Speaker 3: So just look at one thing.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, set a limit.

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Speaker 1: And I'm not sure that's really gonna work for this

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Speaker 1: guy though, because he just opened his first ever Instagram account,

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Speaker 1: and if you want to, you can follow him under

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Speaker 1: hard Shells.

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Speaker 2: Soft Moans. Real Yeah, if you just finding his groove

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Speaker 2: on there, give him a second. That now means Laser

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Speaker 2: Stories has come to an end for the day. We'll

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Speaker 2: do it again, same time on Wednesday.