Speaker 1: What up, fool? What? What up?
Speaker 2: Fool? No?
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, we're not doing that today, babes.
Speaker 2: Today's April Fool's Day. Andrew, Oh okay, I pity the
Speaker 2: fool who said that. Mister T all right, p mister
Speaker 2: T Cereal, not mister T, just the cereal.
Speaker 1: But what did he die?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: This is serial wheelers.
Speaker 2: Hold on, I'm setting back to.
Speaker 1: Sorry, dude, you really need to clean this up.
Speaker 2: What happened?
Speaker 1: There's so much going on in here.
Speaker 2: See look, it's a new day, new clothing.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna put this, throw this all out.
Speaker 2: No you're not, Yeah I am, Then you're not a
Speaker 2: true Cereal connoisseur.
Speaker 1: I am just not a hoarder.
Speaker 2: Does nothing to do with hoarding. I literally we've been
Speaker 2: through this a thousand times.
Speaker 1: I am next to boxes. There's I can't stretch my
Speaker 1: legs out without hitting box.
Speaker 2: This is not a relaxing area.
Speaker 1: Back up without hitting Cereal boxes.
Speaker 2: This is a small space. This is terrifying, but it's
Speaker 2: also my space. I'm getting anxious being in here. Then
Speaker 2: get out. I don't care. I got plenty that would
Speaker 2: like to fill this chair. You have plenty of people
Speaker 2: that want to fill the chair. Yeah. Oh really yeah
Speaker 2: really yep. Okay, welcome to April. First. It is Monday,
Speaker 2: April Fool's Day, twenty twenty four. We should have like
Speaker 2: switched seats.
Speaker 1: Was that an April Fool's joke before?
Speaker 2: No, it wasn't. Oh, people are just clamoring to be
Speaker 2: in the seat, That's right. So here's how I think
Speaker 2: about it at any time. Here's fire. Here's how I
Speaker 2: think I want to do this episode, Andy, since it's
Speaker 2: carefully curated by me, I think that I would like
Speaker 2: to carefully hoarded present the cereals in order of how
Speaker 2: I think they will be rated. So I'm gonna think
Speaker 2: I'm gonna do the worst cereal first, up to the
Speaker 2: best cool all right, sure, so none of these three
Speaker 2: are are really bad, I don't think so it's gonna
Speaker 2: be close. Ready, So again, thank you to our friend mate.
Speaker 2: Matt is a rock star. And I'm not talking about
Speaker 2: our other friend Matt. I'm talking about our cereal friend
Speaker 2: Matt that sends us cereals this Dude, like, thank you, Matt. Really,
Speaker 2: I don't think you appreciate him as much as I do.
Speaker 1: Well, I mean, you're the one who is apparently doing
Speaker 1: everything I'm just no, here's a wonderful, easily filled Pennsylvania.
Speaker 1: Maybe Mack can come in here filling for you. Matt
Speaker 1: could fill in anybody can.
Speaker 2: He can drive on it from AMA's Country and a buggy.
Speaker 2: He'll be here in six weeks and he could sit
Speaker 2: in his chair.
Speaker 1: Yeah, if he actually comes, I would let him sit.
Speaker 2: Okay, So here's it, which I think is going to
Speaker 2: be the lowest sawn dish soap on my hands you're
Speaker 2: not supposed to yeah, now my hands are super dry. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Do you know that I was at I was at
Speaker 2: an office the other day signing some papers and vague
Speaker 2: and so the woman who is the woman who was
Speaker 2: handing me the pen, and she goes, you know, I
Speaker 2: have to ask you, what do you use on your face?
Speaker 2: Because your face is just it's so smooth. And she says,
Speaker 2: I'm gonna anesthetician? Is that what that is? And I said,
Speaker 2: I don't know, luberderm nivia. Whatever I use on my hands,
Speaker 2: I put on my face. She's like typical guy, and
Speaker 2: she shook her head and walked out. You know, so
Speaker 2: first it was a compliment and then it was like
Speaker 2: you shouldn't be using that crap on you see, just see, I.
Speaker 1: Use a retinol, I have a red light mask. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I have a whole bunch of things.
Speaker 2: Shake Shake your Shake Guardy. By the way, you remember
Speaker 2: who sang that song shake Your Love?
Speaker 1: Uh? The thesis really Debbie Debbie Gibson.
Speaker 2: Yes, she's been very active on social media. She's got
Speaker 2: a lot going on. Big anniversary of Electric Youth, the
Speaker 2: CD coming out of the album, releasing her perfume Gosh,
Speaker 2: I hope so, so you could run to the store.
Speaker 2: I'll ride my back to the super X again and
Speaker 2: buy it and spray it all over my pillow. Pretend
Speaker 2: it was a girl there. What Okay, let's just get
Speaker 2: to the cereal please. So this is from the new
Speaker 2: line of Extra Cereals from Calloggs. I don't know why
Speaker 2: it's actually named after you, because I'm so extra. This
Speaker 2: box also Andrew ten Dollar. What is going on? I
Speaker 2: don't and you to know what's so special about random
Speaker 2: piece of tape? What it's a random piece of tape
Speaker 2: on the box. It was probably a coop on that
Speaker 2: Matt used to buy a job. Matt Extra Crispy Clusters.
Speaker 2: This is cinnamon. They also have an almond one melt
Speaker 2: in your mouth, delicious clusters. Okay, huh huh, I don't know.
Speaker 2: I don't know what is so special about this. It's
Speaker 2: delicately crispy clusters, extra indulgent, extra dreamy, and extra luscious.
Speaker 2: I've never heard of cereal be described as luscious.
Speaker 1: Luscious cereal experience.
Speaker 2: An extra delicious moment of pure delight from the first
Speaker 2: bite to the last. Toasty, whole grain oats blended with
Speaker 2: the rich buttery taste of caramelized sugar, paired perfectly with
Speaker 2: Indonesian cinnamon, all in one delectable crispy.
Speaker 1: Bite Indonesian cinnamon.
Speaker 2: Wow over. They make it sound so like fufushi, but
Speaker 2: it's literally Kellogg's Cluster cereal.
Speaker 1: And you know, for an every man like you, you
Speaker 1: don't need all that.
Speaker 2: That's right. This is just like a oken up granola bar.
Speaker 2: Ten dollars a box. Stupid, Not for me.
Speaker 1: I'm in every man.
Speaker 2: I am in every man.
Speaker 1: They could just spit in the box and hand it
Speaker 1: to me and I would take it.
Speaker 2: What about that? So back to the Farmland Fresh Dairyes
Speaker 2: fridge again for a pint of whole milk. I bought
Speaker 2: a bunch of pints. Cool Key Food had a special
Speaker 2: on the pints. I like these, and do you remember.
Speaker 2: Oh oh, I'm so sad. My mom was in the
Speaker 2: hospital like last week and the discarded food cart was
Speaker 2: in the hallway by the elevator and somebody left a
Speaker 2: Farmland Fresh Dairies half pint a fat free milk. I
Speaker 2: was gonna take it, but I don't know how long
Speaker 2: it was been sitting out.
Speaker 1: Thank you Jesus, you can take it. That's like going
Speaker 1: up to a table like.
Speaker 2: No, it wasn't open, that was getting cleaned. It was sealed.
Speaker 2: But I know I could have been sitting there for hours, days,
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 1: No, you don't take food or beverage off of like
Speaker 1: a cart.
Speaker 2: I was just more excited because it was Farmland Fresh
Speaker 2: Dairies half pints. Yes, we used to get those in
Speaker 2: school when we were kids.
Speaker 1: The little Yeah.
Speaker 2: I had safety pup on the side, Remember safety pup.
Speaker 2: Cross on the green, not in between, Cross on the red,
Speaker 2: and you'll wind up dead, safety pup said. I added
Speaker 2: that part in that is all right, here we go. Hmm,
Speaker 2: This gentlemen's really nice.
Speaker 1: Wow, I'm feeling like this is extra indulgent. Hm hm,
Speaker 1: extra dreaming.
Speaker 2: Don't be a jerk, Andrew.
Speaker 1: And wow, that is extra luscious.
Speaker 2: It's not luscious, that's for sure. When I think luscious,
Speaker 2: I think of one of those chocolate covered cherries with
Speaker 2: the goo spilling out of it. That's luscious like chocolate.
Speaker 2: You could have just said the chocolate, not goo. No,
Speaker 2: the cherry goo in the middle. That's the lushiest part.
Speaker 2: Sarah's right, selahs sellas the individually wrapped the cherries, they
Speaker 2: would come out like Christmas time or I hate or
Speaker 2: Valentine's all my favorite. I could sucked down one of
Speaker 2: those cherries a whole gallon I love.
Speaker 1: I don't need to hear about you sucking down lush
Speaker 1: his cherries.
Speaker 2: You listen.
Speaker 1: I give this four bowls. They're good. The cinnamon taste
Speaker 1: is good. It's an overall good cereal.
Speaker 2: I like it. I don't know if it's worth ten dollars, no,
Speaker 2: but it's good. The cinnamon flavor is really not the
Speaker 2: Indonesian cinnamon. Yeah, Chef's kiss.
Speaker 1: All cereals now need to have Indonesian cinnamon or I
Speaker 1: won't try them.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, so you know what, I may have done
Speaker 2: this wrong? Because I said this was going to be
Speaker 2: the least rated cereal. Well you should know that I
Speaker 2: like cinnamon cereals. Yeah, but I just thought it was
Speaker 2: gonna be really an overblown thing. Oh okay, so all right,
Speaker 2: very good, Andrew, it's heavy too. That's a heavy box,
Speaker 2: all right now. Okay, our friend Matt also sent us
Speaker 2: this one. This is also from the map pot. Please
Speaker 2: you see the thing is I have to send that out.
Speaker 2: It's autographed. Oh and every time someone squeezes it and
Speaker 2: rubs the autograph off.
Speaker 1: Stop doesn't look like stop it stop doesn't look like it.
Speaker 2: All right, So this is from Mexico. It does have
Speaker 2: a best by date of February twenty twenty four, but
Speaker 2: that's just merely a month ago. So it's all good.
Speaker 1: Now Wait, I'm so sorry who wrote this post it Matt,
Speaker 1: February twenty twenty four, date Mexico.
Speaker 2: What's the cereals from Mexico? What is telling us where
Speaker 2: it was from?
Speaker 1: What is date?
Speaker 2: That's the date of That's the date on the box.
Speaker 1: Honestly, like this looks like it would be on like
Speaker 1: a wall to solve a murder case, all right, like
Speaker 1: Mexico In quotes why is Mexico In quotes it came
Speaker 1: from Mexico.
Speaker 2: There's so many that doesn't make sense. Okay, so that's
Speaker 2: like saying this.
Speaker 1: Is New York. No, I'm actually in the state of
Speaker 1: New York right now.
Speaker 2: She's telling us where it came from.
Speaker 1: But quotes implies it that it's not Mexico.
Speaker 2: Oh so maybe it's not. There's just there's a whole
Speaker 2: lot about this box that we need to we need
Speaker 2: to die. Let's have this Mexican cereal. So the name
Speaker 2: of the brand is Pampa, Pampa, Pampa, Pampa, Pampa. Probably pampa.
Speaker 2: If it's from Mexico, it's probably pampa. What is pampa?
Speaker 1: Okay, Dora, I didn't know you could teach me Spanish.
Speaker 2: What does pampa mean in English? You can translate into
Speaker 2: English and many other languages. Okay, she doesn't want to
Speaker 2: help anyway, By idiot, these are fruity wheels. Okay, so
Speaker 2: they're fruit loops, Yeah, fake frut loops.
Speaker 1: I was thinking that they were gonna when I saw
Speaker 1: the name fruity wheels, I was thinking it was gonna
Speaker 1: be an actual wheel.
Speaker 2: Like a wagon wheel. Yeah, like Darius Rucker a mom
Speaker 2: rock love that song. I know. I can't wait to
Speaker 2: see him this summer. No fine, because he's playing with
Speaker 2: Hooty and the Blowfish at Jones Beach. But they do
Speaker 2: all the country stuff too.
Speaker 1: Oh my friend Alexa would actually probably like the Hooty
Speaker 1: in the Blowfish part.
Speaker 2: I need tickets.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm sure they won't be hard.
Speaker 2: Yeah that's rude. I saw him there in nineteen ninety
Speaker 2: six at the Jones Beach, at the Jones Beach. I
Speaker 2: have a picture.
Speaker 1: Tom lives and Gina live over by Jones Beach, really
Speaker 1: very close.
Speaker 2: They live on Long Beach. Yeah, they're far down the road.
Speaker 1: It takes them maybe fifteen twenty minutes to get there.
Speaker 2: Sweet and Multi Grain Cereal. There's a link that.
Speaker 1: You know, just you generalize Long Beach and then just said, no,
Speaker 1: they don't.
Speaker 2: In large enlarged image to show texture, like if these
Speaker 2: are in large, look, if these are enlarged, then this
Speaker 2: must be really little, right, because they're saying that this is.
Speaker 2: And there's also pictures of cherries and strawberries and bananas.
Speaker 1: Because maybe that's the flavors.
Speaker 2: There's no bananas in fruit loops.
Speaker 1: Well, maybe that's why this one's different.
Speaker 2: There's so many ingredients here that I don't even know
Speaker 2: what they are. And it's distributed by Transitional Foods. That's
Speaker 2: the name of the company that makes this, and it
Speaker 2: also contains bioengineered food ingredients. I'm a little bit scared about.
Speaker 1: The dollar forty nine. We're from ten dollars luxury cereal
Speaker 1: to dollar forty nine Mexico cereal with a post it note.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, just look at this treasure.
Speaker 2: Please tell me why is Mexico eat quotes? Because he's
Speaker 2: telling us where it's from.
Speaker 1: But you don't need the quotes. Then that's not how
Speaker 1: grammar works.
Speaker 2: Okay, it really has no smell whatsoever.
Speaker 1: Okay, So these were enlarged, right, that's it.
Speaker 2: Don'tstic fingers and no hand jamming. Look at that that
Speaker 2: is not in large. No, these are actually these are enlarged.
Speaker 2: These were shrunk. Honey, I shrunk the cereal. I hate you.
Speaker 1: That was.
Speaker 2: Oh you know something. There's light green ones in here
Speaker 2: that might be actually what they're calling banana light green. Yeah,
Speaker 2: these are weird. There's blue, red, orange?
Speaker 1: Is this mine?
Speaker 2: Yellow? Yeah? It was yours? Okay, okay, oh someone, oh
Speaker 2: there we go, here we go. Andrew fruity wheels from
Speaker 2: Pampa Pampa Pampa Transitional Foods a.
Speaker 1: Dollar forty nine from Mexico that.
Speaker 2: He found in Pennsylvania.
Speaker 1: Wow, No, that's all lot.
Speaker 2: The crunch is weird. The artificial flavor tastes very chemically. Yeah,
Speaker 2: it doesn't taste like fruit lops.
Speaker 1: It tastes like you can't sell this in California because
Speaker 1: it can't answer. Yeah, I feel like I just ate.
Speaker 2: It tastes wanna be fruit loops.
Speaker 1: There is no banana taste, there's no strawberry taste, nothing,
Speaker 1: there's no cherry taste.
Speaker 2: And also my throat is burning, just saying yeah, this
Speaker 2: gets a spoon. It's not even good. I didn't have
Speaker 2: to spit it out, but I would not buy this.
Speaker 1: Serious flavor washes off way too quick. I give this
Speaker 1: a bowl a spoon, eh, a bowl?
Speaker 2: One bowl? All right, So I really messed up because
Speaker 2: I thought this was gonna be okay, let.
Speaker 1: Me just take a quick picture of the company. So
Speaker 1: this way, if I wind up getting a disease, I'm
Speaker 1: telling you, is your throat burning, Yeah, but who knows
Speaker 1: what that could be from?
Speaker 2: It's this. My throat never burns, but it's burning Yeah,
Speaker 2: that was not good. I think Matt is trying to
Speaker 2: kill us. Huh. All right, I got to play something
Speaker 2: here so we can get out of here and come back.
Speaker 2: I don't know, Andrew, please give me some.
Speaker 1: Have anything in the Cereal Graveyard that we could do
Speaker 1: that has to be pre planned.
Speaker 2: I'm Wilford Brimley and I've had diabetes for about twenty
Speaker 2: years and we're back. I'm gonna marked it down for you.
Speaker 2: Andy twelve fifty three.
Speaker 1: Remember when you were going to start doing Cereal Graveyard again?
Speaker 2: I do, and I have a lot of things in mind.
Speaker 1: Great, so then maybe you should start doing them.
Speaker 2: I need to find the gravestone that ever made it
Speaker 2: over from.
Speaker 1: Sure we could just do it without it.
Speaker 2: I need props. I need props.
Speaker 1: You really don't.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I need a picture? Is props the whole thing?
Speaker 1: Cool?
Speaker 2: Because that adds to the experience for sure. So it's
Speaker 2: never gonna happen anyway. Let's get to the third Cereal
Speaker 2: all right? This one's in a bag.
Speaker 1: It God gets off free again.
Speaker 2: This one I bought Kelly's Family Foods. It's four plus
Speaker 2: cherry chocolate. You don't like what cherries? Does your throw
Speaker 2: clothes up, oats, non GMO canola oil, honey, maple syrup,
Speaker 2: cherries and chocolate. Oh, this is gonna be my favorite
Speaker 2: cereal of the day.
Speaker 1: I just I don't get it.
Speaker 2: What.
Speaker 1: I just don't like it.
Speaker 2: Cherry get the.
Speaker 1: Cherry chocolate thing. I just, oh my god, how funny
Speaker 1: you were talking about cherries and chocolate being like your
Speaker 1: favorite candy around Christmas time.
Speaker 2: I didn't even remember I had this.
Speaker 1: Maybe you didn't take your prevagen today, but.
Speaker 2: I really needed I wish it wasn't so expensive. Can
Speaker 2: you please sponsor this podcast prevaging? Yeah, seriously, we can
Speaker 2: have milk and drugs.
Speaker 1: Right, it's a medicine.
Speaker 2: Well, no, it's a supplement, actually supplement. Yeah, so it
Speaker 2: It just looks like a whole bunch of oats. There's
Speaker 2: a few cherries thrown in, and a couple of chunks
Speaker 2: of chocolate. That's what I'm getting from this. It just
Speaker 2: literally smells like granola. Disgusting. Why is it disgusting?
Speaker 1: I just don't want it here, Andrew, It's just the
Speaker 1: chocolate tastes.
Speaker 2: Try to get a little bit of everything on your spood.
Speaker 1: The same. My first cereal Rodeo HM.
Speaker 2: The cherries are really hard and chewy and tastes burnt. Almost.
Speaker 2: I really wanted to like us, but I don't.
Speaker 1: Mm hmmm m there's a decent chocolate taste.
Speaker 2: No, I don't even think it does. Is it dark chocolate? Yeah?
Speaker 2: I'm still trying to get through this cherry. Mm hmm.
Speaker 2: It's like not good. It's really ashamed. Oh look at
Speaker 2: the nice people on the back Andrew.
Speaker 1: Oh god, Cordy, please don't tell me that. It's like, oh,
Speaker 1: we'll started this company after like our dog passed away.
Speaker 2: Nate or Nato. I can't tell the middle one. What
Speaker 2: was the name on that middle one? What?
Speaker 1: Nato? Nato?
Speaker 2: I think it's Nate.
Speaker 1: Just a bad Oh, it say it right here. The
Speaker 1: Kelly family was very active and competitive rowing, so when
Speaker 1: Cordy's two oldest sons, Nate and Will, asked her to
Speaker 1: make a healthy snack for their training program, she baked
Speaker 1: a hearty batch of nutty granola. The boys loved it,
Speaker 1: took it to their workouts and races, shared it with
Speaker 1: their teammates and friends, and everybody wanted to know where
Speaker 1: can I buy it. That's how it all began, just
Speaker 1: as basically Nepo Baby Cereals.
Speaker 2: Trail mix is what it is. I guess right, Yeah,
Speaker 2: just snack mix. You know what. I just got the
Speaker 2: chunk of chocolate, which is not bad.
Speaker 1: They're rowing, they are. If they're rowing, they're rich.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna give this thing up. I'm gonna give this
Speaker 2: thing two balls.
Speaker 1: Yeah that yeah, that sounds fair.
Speaker 2: I like the chocolate chunks. The cherries are way too chewy,
Speaker 2: and it's not old. It's good till November.
Speaker 1: I would like it without cherries, and I'd like it
Speaker 1: without the chocolate. I think you got something. You got
Speaker 1: me Kelly's. I think you got me on the oaths.
Speaker 1: They have other varieties, and do you did you buy them?
Speaker 2: I didn't. What do you want to do? Fill cart
Speaker 2: with Kelly's and spend one hundred dollars?
Speaker 1: No? No, no, you know, especially if it's going into
Speaker 1: their pockets. They don't need the money. Why I'm saying,
Speaker 1: they're entrepreneurs.
Speaker 2: Who cares? They started a business.
Speaker 1: I know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: You don't want anybody to fail, No except maybe Pampa
Speaker 2: whatever they are.
Speaker 1: Pampas being sold wherever this is, I I don't know.
Speaker 2: Yeah, they should transition back to like dog food or
Speaker 2: whatever they came from. Oh wow, well, I don't know
Speaker 2: what said. The Transitional Foods is the company.
Speaker 1: And Transitional Food makes dog food.
Speaker 2: No, but they should, Oh okay, they should. Whatever.
Speaker 1: Anyway, we came full circle.
Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, thank you so much for listening to serial Killers.
Speaker 2: Just probably what do you doing? No? I didn't do
Speaker 2: that because I didn't want to rip the name off
Speaker 2: for the picture picture picture Andrew. I purposely tore it
Speaker 2: like that. Oh you purposely toy? Yes, I carefully went
Speaker 2: over the God. I do things with things in mind.
Speaker 1: Yeah, of course you do. Gosh, my god rips, he
Speaker 1: rips cautiously.
Speaker 2: I do.
Speaker 1: Okay, I always do. Yeah, sure, sure, sure champ.
Speaker 2: Okay, follow us please on all social serial Killers piece.
Speaker 2: Check out our friends Farmland Fresh Dairies on Instagram.
Speaker 1: But what did you think I was going to rate
Speaker 1: any of these cereals?
Speaker 2: I don't know. It's went in order.
Speaker 1: No, you said this is perfectly curated, and you were
Speaker 1: gonna do it from like what you thought we would
Speaker 1: rate it?
Speaker 2: Right, right? I thought this was gonna be good like
Speaker 2: fruit loops. Okay, so thought it was in the middle
Speaker 2: of the road. Okay, and then I thought that was
Speaker 2: gonna be the worst.
Speaker 1: You thought that was gonna be the worst.
Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, So anyway, yeah, do you know how many
Speaker 2: people say when Diamond comes in and just ruins everything, Hey, careful, careful,
Speaker 2: no cursing.
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna do it.
Speaker 2: Please, Okay, Andrew's eating just pure marshmallows right now. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I'm not like that. Now.
Speaker 1: It's a bad episode now that I come in. Cereals
Speaker 1: were discussed.
Speaker 2: Holy over ow, thanks for listening.
Speaker 1: He leaves it all on the floor.
Speaker 2: They cleaned all that confetti up last time.
Speaker 1: And how nice is that?
Speaker 2: It's wonderful. That's what we pay them for.
Speaker 1: Oh, you pay them out of your pocket. Thank you
Speaker 1: so much for listening.
Speaker 2: Check us out, cyreal, you're Diamonds yelling in there. Check
Speaker 2: us out at Serial KILLERSPC dot com. You can see
Speaker 2: all the cereals that we reviewed over one thousand now,
Speaker 2: which is insane.
Speaker 1: Cool.
Speaker 2: Have a great week. We'll see you soon with a
Speaker 2: bold chat. That's the sister podcast to this podcast where
Speaker 2: we just talk about whatever. And Andrew barates me for
Speaker 2: thirty minutes. Oh please say crime.
Speaker 1: Ch Andrew correct? Oh man, I threw away my water
Speaker 1: and it's cold. What the water was cold?
Speaker 2: Where to get you?
Speaker 1: Got on my hands.
Speaker 2: Okay, gotta go. Bye,