1 00:00:02,720 --> 00:00:05,880 Speaker 1: Hi. This is Laura Vandercamp. I'm a mother of five, 2 00:00:06,160 --> 00:00:10,200 Speaker 1: an author, journalist, and speaker. And this is Sarah Hart Hunger. 3 00:00:10,480 --> 00:00:13,480 Speaker 1: I'm a mother of three, a practicing physician and blogger. 4 00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:15,800 Speaker 1: On the side, we are two working parents who love 5 00:00:15,840 --> 00:00:19,320 Speaker 1: our careers and our families. Welcome to best of both worlds. 6 00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:22,400 Speaker 1: Here we talk about how real women manage work, family, 7 00:00:22,560 --> 00:00:25,800 Speaker 1: and time for fun, from figuring out childcare to mapping 8 00:00:25,800 --> 00:00:28,360 Speaker 1: out long term career goals. We want you to get 9 00:00:28,400 --> 00:00:34,159 Speaker 1: the most out of life. Welcome to best of both worlds. 10 00:00:34,360 --> 00:00:37,560 Speaker 1: This is Laura. This is episode two hundred and fifty three, 11 00:00:37,680 --> 00:00:40,960 Speaker 1: airing in early June of twenty twenty two. We're going 12 00:00:41,040 --> 00:00:45,600 Speaker 1: to be talking mid life awakenings, and more so Sarah, 13 00:00:46,080 --> 00:00:48,640 Speaker 1: you had suggested this. I think you had something of 14 00:00:48,800 --> 00:00:53,199 Speaker 1: a mid life awakening. Perhaps, yes, well, I don't know. 15 00:00:53,360 --> 00:00:56,560 Speaker 1: I you know, people toss around the term midlife crisis 16 00:00:56,600 --> 00:01:01,840 Speaker 1: all the time, and I turn forty two, which isn't 17 00:01:01,880 --> 00:01:06,080 Speaker 1: necessarily a year that people necessarily associate with some kind 18 00:01:06,120 --> 00:01:09,400 Speaker 1: of milestone. But I do feel like I'm having a 19 00:01:09,440 --> 00:01:14,319 Speaker 1: lot of midlife thought processes that are perhaps a delayed 20 00:01:14,360 --> 00:01:18,040 Speaker 1: reaction since I did turn forty in May of twenty twenty, 21 00:01:18,360 --> 00:01:22,119 Speaker 1: and we were all a little bit distracted at that time. 22 00:01:22,840 --> 00:01:25,559 Speaker 1: But I didn't like the word crisis because nothing about 23 00:01:25,600 --> 00:01:31,480 Speaker 1: it has been particularly negative. It's felt much more positive. 24 00:01:32,040 --> 00:01:35,480 Speaker 1: Have been much more about, like I guess, having a 25 00:01:35,480 --> 00:01:38,160 Speaker 1: little bit more clarity, and so the word awakening came 26 00:01:38,200 --> 00:01:40,760 Speaker 1: to me as a way to describe it, and I 27 00:01:40,760 --> 00:01:44,560 Speaker 1: think a more positive and descriptive term. So what have 28 00:01:44,640 --> 00:01:48,040 Speaker 1: you been doing as part of this awakening? I mean, 29 00:01:48,120 --> 00:01:50,520 Speaker 1: some of it I still am not able to fully 30 00:01:51,240 --> 00:01:54,840 Speaker 1: discuss here, although I'm sure I will in the future. 31 00:01:55,440 --> 00:01:59,680 Speaker 1: But there's even like some superficial or I guess appearings 32 00:01:59,680 --> 00:02:03,400 Speaker 1: of things, which is that, like, I have been just 33 00:02:03,440 --> 00:02:05,960 Speaker 1: paying a lot more attention to how I'm eating and 34 00:02:06,480 --> 00:02:08,560 Speaker 1: like what I'm putting into my body, because it seems 35 00:02:08,600 --> 00:02:11,120 Speaker 1: like things like migraines and how I feel is really 36 00:02:11,160 --> 00:02:15,919 Speaker 1: impacted by that. I have been just really really thinking 37 00:02:15,960 --> 00:02:18,200 Speaker 1: about what I want. Even though I've always thought about this, 38 00:02:18,280 --> 00:02:20,080 Speaker 1: I've just put even more thought into what I want 39 00:02:20,080 --> 00:02:22,280 Speaker 1: my career to look like long term and my day 40 00:02:22,320 --> 00:02:26,840 Speaker 1: to day and focusing on figuring out what brings me 41 00:02:26,919 --> 00:02:30,280 Speaker 1: a lot of stress and what feels worth it and 42 00:02:30,320 --> 00:02:35,440 Speaker 1: what doesn't, and even some focus on like financial things 43 00:02:35,480 --> 00:02:38,160 Speaker 1: like you know, we've talked about how even when you're 44 00:02:38,200 --> 00:02:41,600 Speaker 1: extremely privileged, which I know we are, there are still 45 00:02:41,680 --> 00:02:46,680 Speaker 1: limited amounts of resources, both time and financial and really 46 00:02:46,720 --> 00:02:53,480 Speaker 1: being purposeful about what I want to use those resources for. Yeah, 47 00:02:53,520 --> 00:02:56,200 Speaker 1: that makes sense. It's funny to figure out. I'm not 48 00:02:56,200 --> 00:02:58,880 Speaker 1: sure that I had the full on early forties midlife 49 00:02:58,880 --> 00:03:04,920 Speaker 1: crisis slash awakening partly because I had Henry. You know, 50 00:03:05,160 --> 00:03:08,200 Speaker 1: I turned forty and got pregnant with him, and had 51 00:03:08,240 --> 00:03:11,160 Speaker 1: him right after my forty first birthday, So that sort 52 00:03:11,200 --> 00:03:14,120 Speaker 1: of time, you know, you still have very young kids, 53 00:03:14,160 --> 00:03:16,920 Speaker 1: and you're any sort of excess mental energy that would 54 00:03:16,919 --> 00:03:21,880 Speaker 1: have been taken up with existential questions is focused on 55 00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:26,720 Speaker 1: making sure he doesn't fall down the stairs. So maybe 56 00:03:26,720 --> 00:03:28,600 Speaker 1: it'll hit soon. Maybe I'll get the car. I don't know. 57 00:03:28,639 --> 00:03:30,160 Speaker 1: I mean, I'm going to get a new car, hopefully 58 00:03:30,200 --> 00:03:32,079 Speaker 1: in another year or two. But we're sort of riding 59 00:03:32,120 --> 00:03:37,600 Speaker 1: out the supply chain slash car ridiculousness right now, where 60 00:03:37,640 --> 00:03:41,080 Speaker 1: people are selling their used cars for more than they 61 00:03:41,080 --> 00:03:44,960 Speaker 1: paid for them and such. So yeah, you're not going 62 00:03:45,000 --> 00:03:47,760 Speaker 1: to start a business on those lines, like start buying 63 00:03:47,840 --> 00:03:50,920 Speaker 1: up like twenty eighteen miles das and selling them at 64 00:03:50,920 --> 00:03:53,240 Speaker 1: a profit. That's not Yeah, no, I don't say, well, 65 00:03:53,240 --> 00:03:55,440 Speaker 1: given that we have limited time, I just don't see 66 00:03:55,480 --> 00:03:59,480 Speaker 1: that as being worth my time on this planet. Even so, 67 00:03:59,480 --> 00:04:01,720 Speaker 1: it's too late for that business. It's too late, like 68 00:04:01,760 --> 00:04:04,120 Speaker 1: you need to have bought the mastas a year ago. 69 00:04:04,280 --> 00:04:06,800 Speaker 1: Yet now now it's like, well, always people want to 70 00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:10,520 Speaker 1: come in at the end of a giant upswing and price. 71 00:04:10,600 --> 00:04:13,720 Speaker 1: You see that with the crypto market, or the housing 72 00:04:13,840 --> 00:04:17,200 Speaker 1: market or anything else that I'm very glad we sold 73 00:04:17,200 --> 00:04:18,880 Speaker 1: our house a couple of months ago and are not 74 00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:24,200 Speaker 1: having to sweat it through the rising interest rates and such. 75 00:04:24,400 --> 00:04:26,960 Speaker 1: But oh, that's so true. That's a good point. Yeah, 76 00:04:26,960 --> 00:04:29,119 Speaker 1: I was going to say, I mean, we certainly didn't 77 00:04:29,279 --> 00:04:31,880 Speaker 1: win anything on the real estate. But on the flip side, 78 00:04:31,920 --> 00:04:35,720 Speaker 1: I've never owned any cryptos me neither as far as 79 00:04:35,720 --> 00:04:39,440 Speaker 1: I know. So what changes have you made? You said 80 00:04:39,440 --> 00:04:41,720 Speaker 1: you made some changes with how you were eating. Are 81 00:04:41,720 --> 00:04:44,120 Speaker 1: there any other sort of life changes coming out of 82 00:04:44,160 --> 00:04:46,719 Speaker 1: this that you can talk about that you have you 83 00:04:46,760 --> 00:04:49,599 Speaker 1: had an awakening? Well, one thing I guess I can 84 00:04:49,680 --> 00:04:51,880 Speaker 1: talk about is that because some of it I just 85 00:04:52,120 --> 00:04:55,279 Speaker 1: can't yet talk about. But Josh and I went through 86 00:04:55,360 --> 00:04:58,320 Speaker 1: a discussion as to whether or not we still needed 87 00:04:58,360 --> 00:05:01,200 Speaker 1: our nanny full time, and there was a moment when 88 00:05:01,240 --> 00:05:04,480 Speaker 1: I thought maybe we were going to not have her 89 00:05:04,520 --> 00:05:06,760 Speaker 1: full time, and I even like approached her about it, 90 00:05:07,760 --> 00:05:12,479 Speaker 1: and then it just hit me that I don't care 91 00:05:12,520 --> 00:05:14,120 Speaker 1: what I have to do. I want to have her 92 00:05:14,120 --> 00:05:17,560 Speaker 1: full time, and that I am willing to sacrifice other 93 00:05:17,720 --> 00:05:21,320 Speaker 1: things in order to keep that, and that having a 94 00:05:21,520 --> 00:05:24,920 Speaker 1: peaceful home life and the opportunity to sometimes take time 95 00:05:24,960 --> 00:05:29,039 Speaker 1: for myself is worth is basically almost priceless to me, 96 00:05:29,160 --> 00:05:31,520 Speaker 1: and I would rather either figure out other ways to 97 00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:34,040 Speaker 1: earn or other places to spend less in order to 98 00:05:34,120 --> 00:05:38,360 Speaker 1: keep that present in my life. And you know, we've 99 00:05:38,360 --> 00:05:40,760 Speaker 1: talked about how difficult it can be to have someone 100 00:05:40,839 --> 00:05:43,919 Speaker 1: that's incredibly reliable in part time, and so it just 101 00:05:43,960 --> 00:05:46,040 Speaker 1: became clear to me that I wanted to keep her 102 00:05:46,080 --> 00:05:50,760 Speaker 1: full time, maybe having her work with some more flexibility 103 00:05:50,800 --> 00:05:53,400 Speaker 1: like we've talked about previously, like doing some more evenings 104 00:05:53,480 --> 00:05:55,919 Speaker 1: or even some date nights or weekends in exchange for 105 00:05:56,080 --> 00:05:58,600 Speaker 1: much much shorter days. So figuring out how to make 106 00:05:58,600 --> 00:06:01,200 Speaker 1: the arrangement work best for go of us, but she 107 00:06:01,240 --> 00:06:04,359 Speaker 1: really wants full time employment. I really want someone who's 108 00:06:04,360 --> 00:06:07,320 Speaker 1: always available for us and to allow me to have 109 00:06:07,440 --> 00:06:10,880 Speaker 1: coverage when I need it, honestly going forward long term. 110 00:06:11,160 --> 00:06:14,800 Speaker 1: And I think this just became even though I hadn't 111 00:06:14,839 --> 00:06:17,159 Speaker 1: really delved into it, like it just became such a 112 00:06:17,240 --> 00:06:20,559 Speaker 1: light bulb that like, yes, this is what I want, Like, yes, 113 00:06:21,320 --> 00:06:24,680 Speaker 1: I recognize it's like lucky and not everybody can have this, 114 00:06:24,800 --> 00:06:28,479 Speaker 1: but I also feel like I will prioritize having this 115 00:06:28,560 --> 00:06:31,520 Speaker 1: over other things if I have to, and that it's 116 00:06:31,560 --> 00:06:33,600 Speaker 1: worth it to me. So things like that, which is 117 00:06:33,680 --> 00:06:35,680 Speaker 1: kind of a big thing that will shape our family lives. 118 00:06:35,680 --> 00:06:38,520 Speaker 1: So the next you know, number of years going forward. Yeah, 119 00:06:38,560 --> 00:06:40,480 Speaker 1: well you know it's actually I've been getting a lot 120 00:06:40,480 --> 00:06:44,320 Speaker 1: of feedback about our recent Rebecca Fike episode on Best 121 00:06:44,320 --> 00:06:46,040 Speaker 1: of Both Worlds. She was on I guess this two 122 00:06:46,080 --> 00:06:47,960 Speaker 1: weeks ago or so one week ago, whatever it was, 123 00:06:48,560 --> 00:06:51,880 Speaker 1: but talking about as she had older children having a 124 00:06:51,920 --> 00:06:56,240 Speaker 1: household manager, just that there's another adult who you know, 125 00:06:56,320 --> 00:06:58,719 Speaker 1: does some stuff with the kids, but that's not necessarily 126 00:06:58,760 --> 00:07:03,240 Speaker 1: even their primary responsibilit but just when you have two 127 00:07:03,320 --> 00:07:05,760 Speaker 1: adults who do things out of the house and don't 128 00:07:05,800 --> 00:07:11,440 Speaker 1: necessarily always have incredible flexibility having an adult who can 129 00:07:12,080 --> 00:07:14,240 Speaker 1: meet the plumber, and so the plumber can come on 130 00:07:14,280 --> 00:07:16,040 Speaker 1: a certain day or not come on that day, come 131 00:07:16,040 --> 00:07:18,120 Speaker 1: on a different day, and it's not a sudden crisis 132 00:07:18,160 --> 00:07:20,680 Speaker 1: that you moved a ton of patients to meet the 133 00:07:20,720 --> 00:07:24,080 Speaker 1: plumber and then the plumber doesn't come on that day, 134 00:07:25,120 --> 00:07:28,360 Speaker 1: or you know, meal prep or something. Just that there's 135 00:07:29,200 --> 00:07:32,360 Speaker 1: having another adult there is. It's just incredibly helpful for 136 00:07:32,440 --> 00:07:34,040 Speaker 1: a lot of people. And so even if you don't 137 00:07:34,080 --> 00:07:37,080 Speaker 1: need the intense childcare anymore, you might still need that. 138 00:07:37,160 --> 00:07:39,520 Speaker 1: And I think she definitely thought that that helped contribute 139 00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:43,200 Speaker 1: to a more sane lifestyle. Yeah, I think it really 140 00:07:43,240 --> 00:07:46,160 Speaker 1: will going forward. And I think I don't know, maybe 141 00:07:46,280 --> 00:07:49,600 Speaker 1: I keep I was under some fantasy land where like, oh, 142 00:07:49,640 --> 00:07:52,360 Speaker 1: at some point, my husband's job will become really easy. 143 00:07:52,520 --> 00:07:55,560 Speaker 1: And then also like my kids will somehow become like 144 00:07:55,640 --> 00:07:59,320 Speaker 1: autonomous beings they won't really need you know, much one 145 00:07:59,360 --> 00:08:02,120 Speaker 1: on one helper care. But like, I think I'm just 146 00:08:02,280 --> 00:08:06,960 Speaker 1: recognizing that in our case in particular, those two things 147 00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:09,400 Speaker 1: are not going to change anytime soon. And then also 148 00:08:09,560 --> 00:08:13,360 Speaker 1: like my time with the kids is limited and I 149 00:08:13,440 --> 00:08:16,080 Speaker 1: want to be able to like go to an event 150 00:08:16,120 --> 00:08:19,120 Speaker 1: with just Annabelle and support her and not be distracted 151 00:08:19,120 --> 00:08:22,600 Speaker 1: by other kids on occasion, or you know, watch a 152 00:08:22,640 --> 00:08:25,760 Speaker 1: sports game by myself without having to dry kids with me, 153 00:08:25,880 --> 00:08:28,760 Speaker 1: et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. So yeah, I guess 154 00:08:28,840 --> 00:08:31,920 Speaker 1: I just I hadn't really like thought about the possibilities there, 155 00:08:31,960 --> 00:08:33,760 Speaker 1: and then once I did, I delved into like, what 156 00:08:33,840 --> 00:08:36,400 Speaker 1: do I really want this next phase of my life, 157 00:08:36,440 --> 00:08:38,720 Speaker 1: this phase with bigger kids, to look like, and it 158 00:08:38,840 --> 00:08:42,520 Speaker 1: just became a lot more clear. Yeah, well, speaking of 159 00:08:42,559 --> 00:08:45,760 Speaker 1: the bigger kids thing, you know, as kids get older, 160 00:08:45,760 --> 00:08:48,240 Speaker 1: it does change what your life looks like. And you're 161 00:08:48,280 --> 00:08:51,120 Speaker 1: starting to see some of that now. Yeah, you know, 162 00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:53,160 Speaker 1: we did that episode on older kids. I think it 163 00:08:53,200 --> 00:08:56,040 Speaker 1: aired last week, but we didn't really focus on ourselves. 164 00:08:56,120 --> 00:08:57,960 Speaker 1: We were talking a lot about the kids and what 165 00:08:58,000 --> 00:09:01,400 Speaker 1: we liked about them. But it does change the shape 166 00:09:01,400 --> 00:09:03,480 Speaker 1: of our lives as well. And yeah, I guess you're right, Laura, 167 00:09:03,520 --> 00:09:05,600 Speaker 1: like I am a little ahead of you in this, 168 00:09:05,679 --> 00:09:08,120 Speaker 1: even though you're way ahead of me and like experiencing teinhood, 169 00:09:08,160 --> 00:09:09,839 Speaker 1: just because I have a little bit of a lot 170 00:09:09,920 --> 00:09:14,080 Speaker 1: shorter of a span of children, and this to me, 171 00:09:14,679 --> 00:09:17,360 Speaker 1: I'm about to head to my college reunion in Williamstown 172 00:09:17,520 --> 00:09:22,080 Speaker 1: for my number twenty. Oh my god. And to me, 173 00:09:22,200 --> 00:09:27,160 Speaker 1: this is a really kind of enlightening event for me 174 00:09:27,240 --> 00:09:30,719 Speaker 1: because I just am brought back to twenty seventeen and 175 00:09:30,760 --> 00:09:34,080 Speaker 1: how I went to this reunion pregnant. I think I 176 00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:37,080 Speaker 1: was about like thirteen or fourteen weeks pregnant, so it 177 00:09:37,120 --> 00:09:40,160 Speaker 1: wasn't even cute attractive pregnant. It was like ambiguously pregnant, 178 00:09:40,200 --> 00:09:42,720 Speaker 1: and I was still having a lot of nausea and 179 00:09:42,880 --> 00:09:44,960 Speaker 1: I was bringing a three and five year old with me. 180 00:09:45,080 --> 00:09:46,600 Speaker 1: And I have fun on that trip, like I have 181 00:09:46,679 --> 00:09:48,679 Speaker 1: fond memories. I bought a T shirt I still wear it, 182 00:09:48,760 --> 00:09:51,120 Speaker 1: Like I saw my favorite professor and I'm going to 183 00:09:51,160 --> 00:09:53,160 Speaker 1: see him this time too, which is really really fun. 184 00:09:53,679 --> 00:09:56,320 Speaker 1: But I also remember being like, oh, I'm totally chasing 185 00:09:56,360 --> 00:09:58,480 Speaker 1: around children, or actually Josh was doing a lot of 186 00:09:58,559 --> 00:10:00,480 Speaker 1: chasing around children, and that I felt that about it, 187 00:10:00,520 --> 00:10:03,199 Speaker 1: and like, I think this is going to be such 188 00:10:03,360 --> 00:10:06,320 Speaker 1: a different experience. No, Genevieve is not, you know, going 189 00:10:06,400 --> 00:10:09,560 Speaker 1: to be all going shopping by herself or something like that, 190 00:10:10,000 --> 00:10:13,760 Speaker 1: but it's just very, very different when you don't have 191 00:10:13,840 --> 00:10:17,760 Speaker 1: to be like tailing one kid to keep them alive. 192 00:10:18,080 --> 00:10:21,800 Speaker 1: And for me, this phase of life is just I 193 00:10:21,800 --> 00:10:23,440 Speaker 1: feel like I've been waiting for it for such a 194 00:10:23,440 --> 00:10:25,400 Speaker 1: long time, and I'm really happy to be there, and 195 00:10:25,400 --> 00:10:28,240 Speaker 1: I really want to appreciate it and enjoy it. And 196 00:10:28,280 --> 00:10:31,520 Speaker 1: I think it will be really fun and interesting to 197 00:10:31,640 --> 00:10:34,040 Speaker 1: just think back when I go on this trip again, 198 00:10:34,200 --> 00:10:36,520 Speaker 1: just how different things are in a span of five years, 199 00:10:36,520 --> 00:10:38,280 Speaker 1: even though I have a lot of kids, like one 200 00:10:38,320 --> 00:10:41,280 Speaker 1: wasn't even born last time, Yeah, exactly. Now they do 201 00:10:41,360 --> 00:10:44,160 Speaker 1: grow up. I am sometimes telling myself that says I'm 202 00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:46,199 Speaker 1: dealing with a two year old that in two years 203 00:10:46,200 --> 00:10:48,440 Speaker 1: he'll before and four year olds are very different from 204 00:10:48,480 --> 00:10:51,320 Speaker 1: two year olds, and they still have obviously many little 205 00:10:51,400 --> 00:10:54,360 Speaker 1: kid issues, but they're they're different ones. And you know, 206 00:10:54,480 --> 00:10:57,120 Speaker 1: I mean, I don't want to sugarcoat everything because we 207 00:10:57,160 --> 00:11:02,160 Speaker 1: also have various teen and preteen drama continuously which they 208 00:11:02,160 --> 00:11:05,680 Speaker 1: have their own parenting requirements, and so it's not like 209 00:11:06,480 --> 00:11:10,520 Speaker 1: the issues go away, but they are different. And so 210 00:11:10,640 --> 00:11:15,280 Speaker 1: I am looking forward to being able to relax on 211 00:11:15,400 --> 00:11:21,840 Speaker 1: weekends without making arrangements, whether that is that Henry is 212 00:11:22,679 --> 00:11:25,760 Speaker 1: with a babysitter, or that Michael and I have explicitly 213 00:11:25,840 --> 00:11:28,320 Speaker 1: traded off, as we sometimes do. I say, like, you 214 00:11:28,360 --> 00:11:30,360 Speaker 1: get this two hours, and then I get this two hours. 215 00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:31,959 Speaker 1: I mean, that's what we do, and then you can 216 00:11:31,960 --> 00:11:34,400 Speaker 1: get the relaxation. But it seems like it might be 217 00:11:34,480 --> 00:11:36,959 Speaker 1: nice not to have to have a spreadsheet of the 218 00:11:37,080 --> 00:11:40,320 Speaker 1: day in order to sit on a hammock. So that's 219 00:11:40,360 --> 00:11:43,920 Speaker 1: something that will be, you know, maybe then I'll have 220 00:11:44,200 --> 00:11:48,040 Speaker 1: mental space for my midlife crisis and we'll decide to 221 00:11:48,120 --> 00:11:51,160 Speaker 1: completely change my job and get a little red sports 222 00:11:51,160 --> 00:11:52,920 Speaker 1: car or whatever it is that I need to do. 223 00:11:53,120 --> 00:11:57,560 Speaker 1: But until then, you no, it's so true, or like 224 00:11:57,600 --> 00:11:59,760 Speaker 1: morning routines or something I was thinking about because I 225 00:11:59,760 --> 00:12:02,439 Speaker 1: did a posts about that recently and someone actually asked 226 00:12:02,440 --> 00:12:04,440 Speaker 1: me in real life. She was like, do you really 227 00:12:04,480 --> 00:12:06,240 Speaker 1: wake up at four forty five? And I'm like, yes, 228 00:12:06,280 --> 00:12:09,240 Speaker 1: I do, lie about it on the blog, like Okay, 229 00:12:09,280 --> 00:12:14,920 Speaker 1: I'm really invested and like making this seeking this image. Yes, 230 00:12:15,040 --> 00:12:17,400 Speaker 1: no that who knows. I guess it's that unbelievable to 231 00:12:17,480 --> 00:12:19,440 Speaker 1: some people. But like that is a warning routine that 232 00:12:19,559 --> 00:12:23,080 Speaker 1: I had wanted to be able to count on for 233 00:12:23,120 --> 00:12:26,160 Speaker 1: so many years now, and it's like only now that 234 00:12:26,280 --> 00:12:29,160 Speaker 1: I can exit my room without a lot of fear 235 00:12:29,200 --> 00:12:31,360 Speaker 1: that someone will wake up. Now, every once in a while, 236 00:12:31,440 --> 00:12:34,000 Speaker 1: someone's sick or someone wakes up, Like you know, it's 237 00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:36,800 Speaker 1: not one hundred percent, but ninety five plus percent of 238 00:12:36,840 --> 00:12:38,959 Speaker 1: the time we have to wake the kids up for 239 00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:41,280 Speaker 1: school or they wake up right around the right time. 240 00:12:41,440 --> 00:12:44,120 Speaker 1: And like, I actually think as your kids get older, 241 00:12:44,120 --> 00:12:47,120 Speaker 1: you need to take time to appreciate how meaningful that is, 242 00:12:47,160 --> 00:12:49,920 Speaker 1: because I think people quickly forget. I still think that's 243 00:12:49,960 --> 00:12:52,240 Speaker 1: part of the whole, Like bigger kids, bigger problems. I'm like, no, 244 00:12:52,360 --> 00:12:54,160 Speaker 1: but I can wake up and work out and no 245 00:12:54,160 --> 00:12:57,080 Speaker 1: one's bothering me, Like, how amazing is that you forget 246 00:12:57,080 --> 00:13:01,360 Speaker 1: about the good parts? Yes, well there is that, No, 247 00:13:01,480 --> 00:13:03,000 Speaker 1: I think. I think it's true. There are big kid 248 00:13:03,040 --> 00:13:06,720 Speaker 1: problems for sure, but the physical and like constant being 249 00:13:06,760 --> 00:13:09,480 Speaker 1: on is a slightly different matter. I mean, you might 250 00:13:09,480 --> 00:13:13,240 Speaker 1: be worried about your teenager being off at something you 251 00:13:13,240 --> 00:13:17,160 Speaker 1: know until midnight, and so that part is there, but 252 00:13:17,200 --> 00:13:19,760 Speaker 1: they're not like physically with you. Worry that you're worried 253 00:13:19,760 --> 00:13:23,040 Speaker 1: about what they're what they're doing necessarily. Yeah, No, it's 254 00:13:23,080 --> 00:13:26,400 Speaker 1: it's true. I think I sort of see that as 255 00:13:26,440 --> 00:13:28,640 Speaker 1: I've gone in and out of those phases as well, 256 00:13:28,679 --> 00:13:31,320 Speaker 1: because I did have a phase in my late thirties 257 00:13:31,360 --> 00:13:33,920 Speaker 1: where I didn't have somebody under age too. I had 258 00:13:34,080 --> 00:13:36,440 Speaker 1: I had a grand total of you know, two years 259 00:13:36,440 --> 00:13:40,000 Speaker 1: actually in fact or so before I was pregnant again. 260 00:13:40,679 --> 00:13:42,440 Speaker 1: But you just start to see elements of that, like, 261 00:13:42,520 --> 00:13:46,840 Speaker 1: for instance, being able to go to bed and assume 262 00:13:47,760 --> 00:13:50,360 Speaker 1: that your alarm clock will be the thing waking you 263 00:13:50,520 --> 00:13:54,480 Speaker 1: up and that has been or or if not that 264 00:13:54,559 --> 00:13:57,040 Speaker 1: it's you popping up before your alarm if you are 265 00:13:57,040 --> 00:13:59,080 Speaker 1: well rested, which is another, you know, great thing to 266 00:13:59,080 --> 00:14:00,720 Speaker 1: aim for. But it's like, I can, I can do 267 00:14:00,760 --> 00:14:04,480 Speaker 1: that now, right, Like I know that if I am 268 00:14:04,520 --> 00:14:07,080 Speaker 1: in bed by eleven and my alarm is set for 269 00:14:07,120 --> 00:14:09,640 Speaker 1: six thirty, that is the amount of sleep I need. 270 00:14:09,880 --> 00:14:12,679 Speaker 1: And if I do that every night during the week, 271 00:14:13,080 --> 00:14:15,080 Speaker 1: I will do the same thing on a weekend, like 272 00:14:15,200 --> 00:14:17,240 Speaker 1: or even if I've shifted, I go about eleven thirty, 273 00:14:17,240 --> 00:14:18,880 Speaker 1: I'll wake up at seven, and I will do that 274 00:14:18,920 --> 00:14:21,360 Speaker 1: on my own because it's just you know, how the 275 00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:24,320 Speaker 1: math works. But I couldn't rely on that for a 276 00:14:24,400 --> 00:14:27,160 Speaker 1: long long time, and so the fact that Henry is 277 00:14:27,200 --> 00:14:31,480 Speaker 1: almost always sleeping through the night is just like whoa, 278 00:14:32,360 --> 00:14:34,800 Speaker 1: It's wonderful. I love it. Of course, then other things happen, 279 00:14:34,880 --> 00:14:36,760 Speaker 1: like we got a brand new alarm system and that 280 00:14:36,800 --> 00:14:41,800 Speaker 1: goes off randomly, but not randomly. There's something that happens. 281 00:14:41,800 --> 00:14:46,640 Speaker 1: We know what's going on, but it's still you know, sleep, 282 00:14:46,680 --> 00:14:48,920 Speaker 1: sleep is a good thing. Well, let's take a quick 283 00:14:48,920 --> 00:14:51,000 Speaker 1: ad break and then we will be back with more 284 00:14:51,080 --> 00:14:53,720 Speaker 1: on this midlife awakening, but really moving more into our 285 00:14:53,760 --> 00:15:10,200 Speaker 1: Mailbag episode. Part of this episode, well, welcome back. We 286 00:15:10,480 --> 00:15:15,080 Speaker 1: have been talking about midlife awakenings. In this episode. We're 287 00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:17,000 Speaker 1: going to transition to a few other topics that we 288 00:15:17,040 --> 00:15:20,200 Speaker 1: wanted to talk about in this episode. One is just 289 00:15:20,760 --> 00:15:24,080 Speaker 1: reporting back on a question we had asked earlier for 290 00:15:24,200 --> 00:15:28,800 Speaker 1: our listeners about elder care and particularly as people's older 291 00:15:28,880 --> 00:15:34,520 Speaker 1: parents were maybe declining physically having some more mental challenges, 292 00:15:34,520 --> 00:15:37,560 Speaker 1: which is really hard for people to anticipate and deal 293 00:15:37,560 --> 00:15:40,200 Speaker 1: with that. And so we got a great letter from 294 00:15:40,240 --> 00:15:42,280 Speaker 1: a listener that I just wanted to read mostly on 295 00:15:42,320 --> 00:15:44,800 Speaker 1: the air. She wanted to be put in touch with 296 00:15:44,840 --> 00:15:46,800 Speaker 1: the person who had asked the question, and we said, well, 297 00:15:46,800 --> 00:15:48,400 Speaker 1: why don't we just put you in touch with everyone 298 00:15:48,400 --> 00:15:51,080 Speaker 1: who might have that question. So here's what she wanted 299 00:15:51,080 --> 00:15:54,040 Speaker 1: to say. She is going through this scenario of her mother, 300 00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:56,520 Speaker 1: who had always been her best friend, she says, and 301 00:15:56,600 --> 00:15:59,000 Speaker 1: is now in the early to mid stages of Alzheimer's. 302 00:15:59,280 --> 00:16:01,720 Speaker 1: Her kids are very young, ages five and three. She's 303 00:16:02,080 --> 00:16:05,120 Speaker 1: grateful to have them, but part of the joy of 304 00:16:05,160 --> 00:16:07,280 Speaker 1: having these young children is tempered with the fact that 305 00:16:07,320 --> 00:16:11,720 Speaker 1: they just won't share many milestones with Grandma, that her 306 00:16:11,720 --> 00:16:13,560 Speaker 1: mother will not be around for many of them. So 307 00:16:13,960 --> 00:16:15,520 Speaker 1: a couple of things that have helped her as she's 308 00:16:15,560 --> 00:16:18,920 Speaker 1: processed this over the past few years. One is, she says, 309 00:16:19,160 --> 00:16:21,920 Speaker 1: making a very conscious effort to be more present and 310 00:16:22,080 --> 00:16:25,240 Speaker 1: patient with my mom. We live about three hours away, 311 00:16:25,240 --> 00:16:27,240 Speaker 1: and no, that's not that far. It's also not near 312 00:16:27,320 --> 00:16:29,280 Speaker 1: enough where I can see her daily, So we've made 313 00:16:29,320 --> 00:16:32,480 Speaker 1: a conscious effort to spend about half the week with her. 314 00:16:32,520 --> 00:16:34,560 Speaker 1: So I'm guessing that this listener has the ability to 315 00:16:34,600 --> 00:16:36,800 Speaker 1: work from home and has worked out an arrangement where 316 00:16:36,840 --> 00:16:38,720 Speaker 1: she can kind of go there for part of the 317 00:16:38,760 --> 00:16:42,280 Speaker 1: week as well. But she says, though it's not a 318 00:16:42,280 --> 00:16:46,600 Speaker 1: great long term plan, it's fine for the immediate short term. Additionally, 319 00:16:46,600 --> 00:16:49,200 Speaker 1: she realizes that she will probably hear the same story 320 00:16:49,200 --> 00:16:52,320 Speaker 1: ten times in the next ten minutes. She will probably 321 00:16:52,360 --> 00:16:55,320 Speaker 1: ask me the same questions repeatedly, and then she won't 322 00:16:55,360 --> 00:16:58,000 Speaker 1: remember the amazing story I just told her. It is 323 00:16:58,040 --> 00:17:00,400 Speaker 1: such a gut wrenching pain, but in the big picture, 324 00:17:00,440 --> 00:17:03,440 Speaker 1: we are trying to create happy memories for her. Also, 325 00:17:03,480 --> 00:17:05,760 Speaker 1: if there's anything you've been wanting to do with a parent, 326 00:17:05,800 --> 00:17:08,760 Speaker 1: she says, or take any special trips, don't delay, just 327 00:17:09,000 --> 00:17:13,240 Speaker 1: do it now. But also don't discount smaller adventures. She's 328 00:17:13,280 --> 00:17:16,320 Speaker 1: doing monthly manny petties with her mother, doing some arts 329 00:17:16,320 --> 00:17:19,080 Speaker 1: and crafts classes, taking weekly dance classes with her mom 330 00:17:19,160 --> 00:17:21,280 Speaker 1: as long as her mom is still physically able to. 331 00:17:21,800 --> 00:17:24,040 Speaker 1: She says, it's similar to thinking about Laura's big adventure 332 00:17:24,040 --> 00:17:26,479 Speaker 1: little adventure weekly, So trying to plan those with the 333 00:17:26,920 --> 00:17:29,880 Speaker 1: aging parent. But as part of that, which is very 334 00:17:29,920 --> 00:17:33,080 Speaker 1: intense to take a trip with a person who is 335 00:17:33,119 --> 00:17:35,680 Speaker 1: in the early mid stages of Alzheimer's, it is very 336 00:17:35,720 --> 00:17:39,440 Speaker 1: intense experience to take an arts and crafts class with 337 00:17:39,480 --> 00:17:41,480 Speaker 1: somebody in the early mid stages of Alzheimer's, she says, 338 00:17:41,480 --> 00:17:44,080 Speaker 1: don't feel bad about also taking time for yourself. She 339 00:17:44,520 --> 00:17:47,000 Speaker 1: recently spent a weekend away from this schedule being with 340 00:17:47,040 --> 00:17:50,080 Speaker 1: her mom to go to a friend's bachelorette. It was 341 00:17:50,200 --> 00:17:53,320 Speaker 1: very much needed. She also recently had taken a trip 342 00:17:53,359 --> 00:17:55,639 Speaker 1: to Disney World and invited her mom to come with us. 343 00:17:55,640 --> 00:17:57,840 Speaker 1: It had been a very difficult experience because it's hard 344 00:17:57,840 --> 00:18:00,199 Speaker 1: to be a caretaker for a parent and kids who 345 00:18:00,200 --> 00:18:02,520 Speaker 1: are very dependent on you. So she has decided that 346 00:18:02,560 --> 00:18:04,919 Speaker 1: they are going to take some vacations that are just 347 00:18:05,480 --> 00:18:08,840 Speaker 1: their nuclear family, husband and kids. So just you know, 348 00:18:08,880 --> 00:18:11,840 Speaker 1: you need to be cognizant of creating some memories with 349 00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:15,040 Speaker 1: the elderly parent, but also don't forget about creating memories 350 00:18:15,040 --> 00:18:18,240 Speaker 1: with just your family as well. She says, you want 351 00:18:18,240 --> 00:18:21,080 Speaker 1: to take care of yourself. Though few researchers agree in 352 00:18:21,080 --> 00:18:24,280 Speaker 1: this space, and we don't know how preventable any of 353 00:18:24,320 --> 00:18:28,320 Speaker 1: this is. There's some worry that dementia and Alzheimer's might 354 00:18:28,440 --> 00:18:31,159 Speaker 1: run in families, and that there might be things that 355 00:18:31,240 --> 00:18:34,480 Speaker 1: you should be looking into yourself personally that could be 356 00:18:34,520 --> 00:18:36,840 Speaker 1: a source of anxiety. But please just look into it, 357 00:18:36,920 --> 00:18:39,439 Speaker 1: she says. Some resources that have helped her, and I 358 00:18:39,480 --> 00:18:41,560 Speaker 1: want to be clear, this is Laura talking here. We 359 00:18:41,600 --> 00:18:43,280 Speaker 1: have not vetted these, but I'm just going to share 360 00:18:43,320 --> 00:18:47,160 Speaker 1: a few of them. One is the neuroplan dot com. 361 00:18:47,359 --> 00:18:51,320 Speaker 1: Neuroneu are the Neuroplan dot Com. It's husband and wife 362 00:18:51,359 --> 00:18:54,800 Speaker 1: neurologists who have dedicated their professional careers to this space. 363 00:18:55,520 --> 00:19:01,399 Speaker 1: Apollohealth dot com with doctor Brettison. Brettison is b R 364 00:19:01,480 --> 00:19:06,920 Speaker 1: E D E S E N AARP has some good resources, including, 365 00:19:06,920 --> 00:19:10,440 Speaker 1: she says, Peter Gallagher on Alzheimer's, so check that out, 366 00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:15,040 Speaker 1: and then a Thoughtful Place blog, So a Thoughtful Place 367 00:19:15,160 --> 00:19:18,879 Speaker 1: blog dot com and then backslash Journey with Alzheimer's. So 368 00:19:18,920 --> 00:19:21,320 Speaker 1: if you just google Thoughtful Place blog and the Journey 369 00:19:21,359 --> 00:19:23,679 Speaker 1: with Alzheimer's, that will probably come up as well. So 370 00:19:23,720 --> 00:19:25,600 Speaker 1: thank you very much to our listener for sharing all 371 00:19:25,640 --> 00:19:28,160 Speaker 1: those resources and of people going through that. I hope 372 00:19:28,160 --> 00:19:31,280 Speaker 1: that is helpful to you. Yeah, so helpful. I'm so 373 00:19:31,400 --> 00:19:36,080 Speaker 1: glad she sent that in. And you know, we're continuing 374 00:19:36,160 --> 00:19:40,119 Speaker 1: to get this question a lot. So if you have 375 00:19:40,240 --> 00:19:43,200 Speaker 1: even further experiences to share or things that have helped 376 00:19:43,200 --> 00:19:46,639 Speaker 1: you or your family in terms of even just logistical things, 377 00:19:47,600 --> 00:19:51,360 Speaker 1: things you've done to prepare, things you have helped your 378 00:19:51,400 --> 00:19:54,080 Speaker 1: parents in relocating or things like that. We are happy 379 00:19:54,080 --> 00:19:56,680 Speaker 1: to share those as well. And this is one of 380 00:19:56,760 --> 00:19:58,520 Speaker 1: those things where if you have a lot to say, 381 00:19:59,040 --> 00:20:01,680 Speaker 1: you could also consider sending us a voice recording. By 382 00:20:01,720 --> 00:20:04,040 Speaker 1: the way, you could actually just use the memo app 383 00:20:04,080 --> 00:20:05,960 Speaker 1: on your phone and email it to us. We can 384 00:20:05,960 --> 00:20:08,639 Speaker 1: splice that right in, or you can use speak pipe. 385 00:20:08,720 --> 00:20:11,200 Speaker 1: There's one on my website. If you go to Best 386 00:20:11,240 --> 00:20:13,720 Speaker 1: Laid Plans and scroll down, you can do it that way. 387 00:20:14,480 --> 00:20:17,000 Speaker 1: But honestly, there's nothing fancy about sending a voice memo. 388 00:20:17,119 --> 00:20:19,040 Speaker 1: Anybody can do it. You can just email it out 389 00:20:19,119 --> 00:20:21,239 Speaker 1: and maybe we could include some actual clips. If you're 390 00:20:21,280 --> 00:20:23,840 Speaker 1: willing to share your voice on the air, that would 391 00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:26,480 Speaker 1: be great. Well, we have two other questions so we 392 00:20:26,520 --> 00:20:28,720 Speaker 1: wanted to do with that. Last one wasn't really a question, 393 00:20:28,760 --> 00:20:31,840 Speaker 1: it was a helpful statement. So Sarah, why don't you 394 00:20:31,840 --> 00:20:33,879 Speaker 1: grab this next one? Oh, this is a fun one. 395 00:20:34,080 --> 00:20:36,600 Speaker 1: This comes from Heather. She writes, My husband and I 396 00:20:36,680 --> 00:20:38,960 Speaker 1: just welcomed our second babe, and I have been looking 397 00:20:38,960 --> 00:20:41,720 Speaker 1: through your archives, meaning my archives, to read about the 398 00:20:41,760 --> 00:20:44,439 Speaker 1: early months of Anabel Cameron and Genevieve's lives, and I 399 00:20:44,440 --> 00:20:46,960 Speaker 1: thought an interesting question for you and Laura might be 400 00:20:47,040 --> 00:20:50,520 Speaker 1: whether your infant's temperaments continued on through childhood. I was 401 00:20:50,520 --> 00:20:53,080 Speaker 1: reading about how Cameron was a very chill and calm 402 00:20:53,119 --> 00:20:55,760 Speaker 1: sounding baby, and now it seems like he's quite open 403 00:20:55,800 --> 00:21:00,640 Speaker 1: with energy. Okay, so I love this question. This actually 404 00:21:00,960 --> 00:21:04,399 Speaker 1: spawned I started looking at some of my archives, and 405 00:21:04,440 --> 00:21:07,159 Speaker 1: then last night, my kids and I spend a lovely 406 00:21:07,240 --> 00:21:10,080 Speaker 1: thirty or forty minutes watching Google. We have all of 407 00:21:10,080 --> 00:21:13,240 Speaker 1: our photos archived on Google Photos and so you can search, 408 00:21:13,560 --> 00:21:15,840 Speaker 1: and we were watching like little baby videos of Cameron 409 00:21:15,880 --> 00:21:17,800 Speaker 1: and Genevieve and Annabel, and like I was watching him 410 00:21:17,800 --> 00:21:20,119 Speaker 1: play basketball as a two year old, with a shocking 411 00:21:20,200 --> 00:21:22,200 Speaker 1: amount of skill for a two year old in my opinion, 412 00:21:22,640 --> 00:21:27,280 Speaker 1: And so I think, I mean, yes, Cameron in particular 413 00:21:27,440 --> 00:21:30,520 Speaker 1: is probably a higher energy kid than he was a baby, 414 00:21:30,520 --> 00:21:33,840 Speaker 1: but there were still inklings of being a very physical child, 415 00:21:33,920 --> 00:21:37,439 Speaker 1: a very coordinated child, a child who loves activity and 416 00:21:37,520 --> 00:21:40,119 Speaker 1: sleeps well. And guess what, he actually still sleeps well. 417 00:21:40,400 --> 00:21:43,840 Speaker 1: He may tend to have some hypertendencies during the day, 418 00:21:44,200 --> 00:21:46,440 Speaker 1: but he is actually my easiest kid to fall asleep, 419 00:21:46,800 --> 00:21:49,679 Speaker 1: and often we'll sleep the layest on the weekend. So 420 00:21:49,720 --> 00:21:52,640 Speaker 1: I think to some extent, some of those baby tendencies 421 00:21:53,200 --> 00:21:56,399 Speaker 1: do hold true. However, I can also use him to 422 00:21:56,440 --> 00:21:59,000 Speaker 1: say that, like he was my easiest baby to put 423 00:21:59,080 --> 00:22:02,119 Speaker 1: to bed because by necessity. I remember Annabel was like 424 00:22:02,240 --> 00:22:04,320 Speaker 1: horrendous and I would have to I'm sure it was 425 00:22:04,359 --> 00:22:06,159 Speaker 1: partially like my own doing, but I would have to 426 00:22:06,200 --> 00:22:08,360 Speaker 1: like show her YouTube videos. We had a whole ritual, 427 00:22:08,400 --> 00:22:09,919 Speaker 1: and you know, i'd put her to bed and I 428 00:22:10,000 --> 00:22:12,360 Speaker 1: literally would like plunk baby Cameron into bed and walk away, 429 00:22:12,400 --> 00:22:14,800 Speaker 1: and he would just go to sleep, which is whatever. 430 00:22:15,080 --> 00:22:17,719 Speaker 1: I mean, he didn't seem to mind. And now he 431 00:22:17,760 --> 00:22:19,240 Speaker 1: really doesn't like that at all. He likes you to 432 00:22:19,280 --> 00:22:22,440 Speaker 1: lay with him and everything. So these things change developmentally, 433 00:22:23,040 --> 00:22:26,520 Speaker 1: but I think there are some basic temperamental things which 434 00:22:26,640 --> 00:22:29,600 Speaker 1: hold true. Annabel has been quite stubborn from a very 435 00:22:29,600 --> 00:22:34,679 Speaker 1: young age, and Genevieve was generally a very happy child 436 00:22:34,760 --> 00:22:36,560 Speaker 1: who just kind of like delights in a lot of things. 437 00:22:36,640 --> 00:22:39,880 Speaker 1: And she was a very happy, smiley baby. So I 438 00:22:39,920 --> 00:22:42,720 Speaker 1: hope that you will have some of the good things 439 00:22:42,720 --> 00:22:45,080 Speaker 1: and your babies continue on to childhood. And I think 440 00:22:45,080 --> 00:22:48,959 Speaker 1: it's definitely possible. Yeah, I don't know. I think it's 441 00:22:49,040 --> 00:22:52,840 Speaker 1: one of these things, is that we always like to find. Yes, 442 00:22:53,000 --> 00:22:55,520 Speaker 1: you know, evidence in the past of how people are 443 00:22:55,560 --> 00:22:56,920 Speaker 1: like now. I mean, it's one of the things that 444 00:22:56,960 --> 00:22:59,040 Speaker 1: people tell you, even with like career coaching, like ooh, 445 00:22:59,080 --> 00:23:01,320 Speaker 1: look back to a time when you felt really good 446 00:23:01,359 --> 00:23:03,679 Speaker 1: about X, Y or Z or some early story that 447 00:23:04,160 --> 00:23:09,320 Speaker 1: therefore sheds illumination on your current dilemmas you are facing. 448 00:23:09,680 --> 00:23:13,120 Speaker 1: I think it's a bit of a hunting and pecking 449 00:23:13,240 --> 00:23:16,520 Speaker 1: kind of experience, like you're looking through and cherry picking, 450 00:23:16,560 --> 00:23:20,760 Speaker 1: as they say, what stories then make sense for what 451 00:23:20,880 --> 00:23:23,840 Speaker 1: you know of the person now. So I could do 452 00:23:23,960 --> 00:23:26,000 Speaker 1: some of that. I could also find different things. I mean, 453 00:23:26,040 --> 00:23:28,240 Speaker 1: I could say that, yes, Josper was a lower sleep 454 00:23:28,280 --> 00:23:30,199 Speaker 1: needs baby than probably a lot of people, and he 455 00:23:30,320 --> 00:23:33,359 Speaker 1: still is a lower sleep needs kid, versus some of 456 00:23:33,400 --> 00:23:35,960 Speaker 1: my other children appear to like their sleep much more 457 00:23:36,320 --> 00:23:41,360 Speaker 1: than others. I remember Sam really liking his food a lot, 458 00:23:41,880 --> 00:23:44,040 Speaker 1: and is probably the child who is more willing to 459 00:23:44,200 --> 00:23:49,120 Speaker 1: try different flavors. However, there have been times when other 460 00:23:49,200 --> 00:23:52,640 Speaker 1: kids have tried random things and then become picky later 461 00:23:52,720 --> 00:23:56,360 Speaker 1: on or whatever. And you know, Alex was a very 462 00:23:56,400 --> 00:24:00,320 Speaker 1: physical risk taker as a baby to climbing on things, 463 00:24:00,520 --> 00:24:05,239 Speaker 1: definitely continued with that now, but there's other things that 464 00:24:05,440 --> 00:24:07,600 Speaker 1: then change as well. So I don't know, you know, 465 00:24:08,440 --> 00:24:11,360 Speaker 1: who knows, or I could be mixing up children right 466 00:24:11,440 --> 00:24:13,200 Speaker 1: like I had thought that kid did it as a baby, 467 00:24:13,200 --> 00:24:15,199 Speaker 1: because it seems like that kid now, but who know, 468 00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:17,720 Speaker 1: they may not have I don't know. It's a fun game. 469 00:24:17,840 --> 00:24:20,119 Speaker 1: It's a fun game, and it's fun more to like 470 00:24:20,880 --> 00:24:24,800 Speaker 1: tell people's stories about their identity. So I mean one thing, 471 00:24:24,840 --> 00:24:26,800 Speaker 1: I would suggest doing this as more of a like, 472 00:24:27,680 --> 00:24:31,080 Speaker 1: you know, kind of prospective thing that you might help 473 00:24:31,280 --> 00:24:35,239 Speaker 1: children actually love hearing like family stories and stories from 474 00:24:35,280 --> 00:24:38,360 Speaker 1: their childhood or whatever, in ways that illuminate them as 475 00:24:38,400 --> 00:24:40,480 Speaker 1: they want to see themselves and as they're becoming. So 476 00:24:40,480 --> 00:24:42,520 Speaker 1: if there is a trait of your childs that you 477 00:24:42,560 --> 00:24:45,119 Speaker 1: think they are proud of and looking to develop, I 478 00:24:45,160 --> 00:24:49,000 Speaker 1: would highly suggest looking back into the past and finding 479 00:24:49,040 --> 00:24:52,520 Speaker 1: some sort of story that reflects that, either from their 480 00:24:52,520 --> 00:24:55,160 Speaker 1: own life or maybe from a relative's life, and say, oh, 481 00:24:55,200 --> 00:24:58,919 Speaker 1: I see that in you, Oh love that and some 482 00:24:59,040 --> 00:25:01,040 Speaker 1: of that. Probably you're right abo the cherry picking, I'm 483 00:25:01,080 --> 00:25:03,800 Speaker 1: sure like I could if I had an objective list 484 00:25:03,840 --> 00:25:05,440 Speaker 1: of treats, I could be like, well, this one changed 485 00:25:05,440 --> 00:25:07,080 Speaker 1: this one stayed the same, this one changed, this one 486 00:25:07,160 --> 00:25:10,719 Speaker 1: stayed the same. So very that's probably true, but it 487 00:25:10,760 --> 00:25:12,399 Speaker 1: is easy to find those threads, and you're right, the 488 00:25:12,480 --> 00:25:14,480 Speaker 1: kids totally delight in them, just like they delighted in 489 00:25:14,560 --> 00:25:17,280 Speaker 1: watching those videos. So I guess we'll see. But this 490 00:25:17,320 --> 00:25:19,560 Speaker 1: is a very fun question, and if anybody wants to 491 00:25:19,600 --> 00:25:21,880 Speaker 1: weigh in on whether it is true for their babies, 492 00:25:22,720 --> 00:25:26,200 Speaker 1: we would love to hear it. Yeah, exactly, all right, 493 00:25:26,240 --> 00:25:28,879 Speaker 1: So this next question, we'll let Sarah start with her 494 00:25:28,880 --> 00:25:32,200 Speaker 1: answer on this, But it's a meal prep question, and 495 00:25:32,240 --> 00:25:34,879 Speaker 1: as this listener writes, for her, making dinner during the 496 00:25:34,880 --> 00:25:38,399 Speaker 1: week is a source of much frustration. I handle everything 497 00:25:38,400 --> 00:25:40,879 Speaker 1: related to feeding our little family, which is her husband 498 00:25:40,880 --> 00:25:43,560 Speaker 1: and her eleven month old, including the mentally draining task 499 00:25:43,920 --> 00:25:46,639 Speaker 1: of figuring out what we'll eat each night. Since her 500 00:25:46,680 --> 00:25:50,200 Speaker 1: husband manages most other household tasks, she says she doesn't 501 00:25:50,200 --> 00:25:51,960 Speaker 1: expect him to chip in with this one, which he 502 00:25:52,040 --> 00:25:54,160 Speaker 1: also hates the most. So I guess they were really 503 00:25:54,440 --> 00:25:56,960 Speaker 1: who gets the short straw on this one, and he 504 00:25:57,040 --> 00:25:59,320 Speaker 1: was willing to do everything else to avoid this, so 505 00:25:59,359 --> 00:26:02,160 Speaker 1: now she is cooking anyways. She says they are both 506 00:26:02,200 --> 00:26:04,399 Speaker 1: residents and fellows, And on the best clinic day, she 507 00:26:04,440 --> 00:26:06,679 Speaker 1: can get home at five thirty or six. If I 508 00:26:06,680 --> 00:26:09,000 Speaker 1: immediately start cooking, I get the most simple dinner on 509 00:26:09,000 --> 00:26:11,280 Speaker 1: the table at six or six thirty. Coupled with cleanup. 510 00:26:11,520 --> 00:26:13,400 Speaker 1: That only leaves a little bit of time to enjoy 511 00:26:13,480 --> 00:26:16,199 Speaker 1: with our little girl before bedtime. We are thinking of 512 00:26:16,240 --> 00:26:18,760 Speaker 1: having another child, and I can't imagine coming home and 513 00:26:18,800 --> 00:26:21,120 Speaker 1: having to nurse a baby and make dinner every night. 514 00:26:21,200 --> 00:26:24,320 Speaker 1: So how do we outsource dinner prep? Her nanny has 515 00:26:24,400 --> 00:26:28,040 Speaker 1: zero interest in cooking, you know, and that's not going 516 00:26:28,080 --> 00:26:31,359 Speaker 1: to change. They love her and so that's just the 517 00:26:31,400 --> 00:26:33,720 Speaker 1: reality of it. She also doesn't want to spend more 518 00:26:33,720 --> 00:26:35,720 Speaker 1: than an hour on the weekend prepping meals for the 519 00:26:35,760 --> 00:26:38,440 Speaker 1: whole week, because weekends that they both have off are 520 00:26:38,480 --> 00:26:41,840 Speaker 1: just way too sacred. So what do we recommend? Hi, 521 00:26:42,200 --> 00:26:44,760 Speaker 1: This is a great question, and I had another idea 522 00:26:44,760 --> 00:26:47,080 Speaker 1: occur to me while you were reading it, which is, 523 00:26:47,960 --> 00:26:53,480 Speaker 1: I guess, just to make sure you're not giving yourself 524 00:26:53,520 --> 00:26:56,439 Speaker 1: a narrative about how horrible this dinner prep is and 525 00:26:56,480 --> 00:26:58,560 Speaker 1: you're spending I think the line that tipped me off 526 00:26:58,640 --> 00:27:00,640 Speaker 1: is like, I only have two hours of precious time 527 00:27:00,680 --> 00:27:03,800 Speaker 1: with my little one, and I'm like, you know, this 528 00:27:03,880 --> 00:27:07,200 Speaker 1: is like a toddler, Like I mean, taking thirty minutes 529 00:27:07,320 --> 00:27:10,119 Speaker 1: putting a podcast on maybe sipping your favorite beverage and 530 00:27:10,160 --> 00:27:14,240 Speaker 1: prepping dinner while your partner takes the baby. I mean, 531 00:27:14,680 --> 00:27:16,400 Speaker 1: is there a little element of like, oh my god, 532 00:27:16,440 --> 00:27:18,040 Speaker 1: I must not miss one second of this, or I'm 533 00:27:18,040 --> 00:27:19,720 Speaker 1: a terrible mother. I don't know, like I'm just one. 534 00:27:19,760 --> 00:27:22,359 Speaker 1: I'm maybe I'm wrong. I'm just like, as make sure 535 00:27:22,400 --> 00:27:26,199 Speaker 1: that you really wouldn't want to spend thirty minutes, you know, 536 00:27:26,320 --> 00:27:28,720 Speaker 1: doing something. Maybe it's not maybe it's not feasible, or 537 00:27:28,720 --> 00:27:30,119 Speaker 1: maybe you just need to be eating the second you 538 00:27:30,200 --> 00:27:32,719 Speaker 1: come in the door, which is absolutely I totally understand, 539 00:27:32,760 --> 00:27:34,879 Speaker 1: especially with little kids, can be a thing. But I 540 00:27:35,000 --> 00:27:37,680 Speaker 1: just just throwing that out there as well. But otherwise, 541 00:27:37,840 --> 00:27:40,760 Speaker 1: you know, you guys know I love Preptish not an ad. 542 00:27:40,800 --> 00:27:42,920 Speaker 1: It's an ad on Besclaid Plans, but they don't advertise 543 00:27:42,960 --> 00:27:46,239 Speaker 1: on this podcast, but I are nanny usually does it, 544 00:27:46,359 --> 00:27:49,480 Speaker 1: so I mean, to be fair, that's one option would 545 00:27:49,480 --> 00:27:52,119 Speaker 1: be if you you said your nanny was not interested 546 00:27:52,160 --> 00:27:55,639 Speaker 1: in cooking, But what if there was a very clear 547 00:27:55,720 --> 00:27:58,240 Speaker 1: plan and you were paying a little extra for her 548 00:27:58,280 --> 00:28:00,760 Speaker 1: to do that task. I don't know, maybe maybe that 549 00:28:00,800 --> 00:28:03,880 Speaker 1: would be possible, or maybe you said you'd be willing 550 00:28:03,920 --> 00:28:05,720 Speaker 1: to spend no more than an hour on the weekends. 551 00:28:05,760 --> 00:28:07,840 Speaker 1: But they actually have super fast plans that you can 552 00:28:07,920 --> 00:28:10,200 Speaker 1: spend about an hour to prep to make your prep 553 00:28:10,320 --> 00:28:12,919 Speaker 1: very minimal during the week. So that's one option. Another 554 00:28:12,960 --> 00:28:15,800 Speaker 1: option is I actually just googled around. This is also 555 00:28:15,880 --> 00:28:18,920 Speaker 1: non spawn. But there are services kind of like meal 556 00:28:18,960 --> 00:28:21,600 Speaker 1: kit services, except the food's already done. It's already cooked 557 00:28:21,640 --> 00:28:23,439 Speaker 1: for you. You You just like put in the oven. The 558 00:28:23,480 --> 00:28:26,520 Speaker 1: one that came up on Google. Again, have not tried it, 559 00:28:26,560 --> 00:28:29,640 Speaker 1: cannot vouch but it's called Freshly. But I'm sure there 560 00:28:29,640 --> 00:28:31,280 Speaker 1: are others, or there may be some just local to 561 00:28:31,320 --> 00:28:35,600 Speaker 1: your area. And you could do something like on Sunday, 562 00:28:35,720 --> 00:28:38,040 Speaker 1: make chili for like two days worth, you know, spend 563 00:28:38,040 --> 00:28:40,400 Speaker 1: thirty minutes, throw that in there, let it simmer. Then 564 00:28:40,440 --> 00:28:43,280 Speaker 1: that's your dinner for Sunday and Monday. Maybe Tuesday is 565 00:28:43,320 --> 00:28:45,120 Speaker 1: takeout night. It's like a nice break in the middle 566 00:28:45,120 --> 00:28:47,360 Speaker 1: of the week. You're getting sushi, you're getting pizza, whatever. 567 00:28:47,960 --> 00:28:50,640 Speaker 1: Then on Wednesday and Thursday and maybe even Friday, you 568 00:28:50,640 --> 00:28:52,960 Speaker 1: could get meals from one of these services like Freshly 569 00:28:53,080 --> 00:28:55,640 Speaker 1: or whatever, and then Saturday could be another takeout night, 570 00:28:55,680 --> 00:28:58,040 Speaker 1: and there there's your week with minimal cooking a good 571 00:28:58,040 --> 00:29:01,280 Speaker 1: amount of variety. I'm sure for is more expensive or 572 00:29:01,320 --> 00:29:03,840 Speaker 1: other services like that than making it yourself, but you 573 00:29:03,880 --> 00:29:06,720 Speaker 1: are saving time if you really don't want to spend 574 00:29:06,760 --> 00:29:10,080 Speaker 1: time doing anything. And I will mention localness because I 575 00:29:10,080 --> 00:29:12,560 Speaker 1: have a friend who does this with a local restaurant 576 00:29:12,920 --> 00:29:15,560 Speaker 1: in outside of Milwaukee, and I remember in Durham there 577 00:29:15,600 --> 00:29:17,640 Speaker 1: was this cute little cafe that also offered like a 578 00:29:17,640 --> 00:29:19,600 Speaker 1: week's worth of meals that you would just sign up 579 00:29:19,640 --> 00:29:21,200 Speaker 1: and pick it up from the restaurant at a pretty 580 00:29:21,200 --> 00:29:25,000 Speaker 1: reasonable price. So there may be some options that don't involve, 581 00:29:25,040 --> 00:29:26,680 Speaker 1: you know, getting giant things shipped to your door, but 582 00:29:26,720 --> 00:29:28,240 Speaker 1: you just pick everything up one day on the way 583 00:29:28,240 --> 00:29:30,920 Speaker 1: home from work and you have stuff for the week. Yeah, 584 00:29:31,040 --> 00:29:35,080 Speaker 1: and I think she also needs to rethink what dinner is. 585 00:29:35,120 --> 00:29:37,239 Speaker 1: I wonder if she has this like, yeah, idea that 586 00:29:37,280 --> 00:29:40,200 Speaker 1: it's you know, made from scratch, and she says very 587 00:29:40,240 --> 00:29:42,400 Speaker 1: simple dinner. You might even want to dial down your 588 00:29:42,400 --> 00:29:46,360 Speaker 1: expectation of what's simple is because you could scramble eggs 589 00:29:46,400 --> 00:29:49,160 Speaker 1: in less than five minutes and then wow, you've got 590 00:29:49,280 --> 00:29:52,120 Speaker 1: cut up fruit from the grocery store with that, and 591 00:29:52,160 --> 00:29:55,080 Speaker 1: that's dinner. Okay, I'm serious, that is dinner. That is 592 00:29:55,160 --> 00:29:57,960 Speaker 1: a food, and it doesn't need to be anything bigger 593 00:29:58,400 --> 00:30:01,800 Speaker 1: than that. I would also suggests buying like pre made 594 00:30:01,840 --> 00:30:05,720 Speaker 1: meals from places like Costco or you know, your every 595 00:30:05,760 --> 00:30:09,280 Speaker 1: supermarket has a whole deli section of pre made meals. 596 00:30:09,640 --> 00:30:11,680 Speaker 1: And then all your nanny has to do is, you know, 597 00:30:12,240 --> 00:30:14,720 Speaker 1: turn on the oven, right, Like, she doesn't want a 598 00:30:14,760 --> 00:30:16,720 Speaker 1: meal prep but she can turn on the oven when 599 00:30:16,760 --> 00:30:19,520 Speaker 1: you say I am forty five minutes from being home 600 00:30:19,640 --> 00:30:21,640 Speaker 1: or whatever, and so it's on. She sticks it in 601 00:30:22,000 --> 00:30:23,600 Speaker 1: twenty minutes before you walk in the door, and then 602 00:30:23,640 --> 00:30:26,080 Speaker 1: it's ready when you walk in the door. Like, again, 603 00:30:26,160 --> 00:30:28,440 Speaker 1: that is not a huge ask. You're not making it 604 00:30:28,480 --> 00:30:30,160 Speaker 1: asking her to whip up a soup fle It is 605 00:30:30,280 --> 00:30:33,320 Speaker 1: just turning on an oven sticking something in it. So 606 00:30:33,480 --> 00:30:36,080 Speaker 1: I think you could get away with, you know, multiple 607 00:30:36,200 --> 00:30:39,760 Speaker 1: nights per week doing that and then having the scrambled 608 00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:42,640 Speaker 1: eggs one night, grilled cheese another night, another thing that 609 00:30:42,720 --> 00:30:45,479 Speaker 1: takes literally five minutes to make on a griddle. You know, 610 00:30:45,920 --> 00:30:49,200 Speaker 1: put out grilled bread for the three of you, blop 611 00:30:49,320 --> 00:30:51,320 Speaker 1: cheese on it, put another piece of bread on top, 612 00:30:51,680 --> 00:30:55,320 Speaker 1: have that with fread or fruit or a microwave bag 613 00:30:55,360 --> 00:30:57,400 Speaker 1: of veggies. Right, you can get green beans or whatever 614 00:30:57,400 --> 00:30:59,120 Speaker 1: that you just stick in the microwave for four minutes 615 00:30:59,120 --> 00:31:02,120 Speaker 1: and it steams in the bag and again there is dinner. Now, 616 00:31:02,200 --> 00:31:04,600 Speaker 1: I am not saying this is like any sort of 617 00:31:04,640 --> 00:31:07,920 Speaker 1: culinary awesomeness whatsoever, but it's going to be cheaper than 618 00:31:07,920 --> 00:31:10,120 Speaker 1: all those meal delivery services you're talking about. And if 619 00:31:10,120 --> 00:31:11,920 Speaker 1: your two residents who are also paying for a full 620 00:31:11,920 --> 00:31:15,480 Speaker 1: time nanny, that may matter. And so yeah, just looking 621 00:31:15,520 --> 00:31:18,440 Speaker 1: at what your supermarket options are for you know, somebody 622 00:31:18,480 --> 00:31:20,320 Speaker 1: can just stick in the oven or the very very 623 00:31:20,320 --> 00:31:23,360 Speaker 1: simple stuff like grilled cheese and scrambled eggs and then 624 00:31:23,480 --> 00:31:25,680 Speaker 1: just let it be. Like there's no reason to even 625 00:31:25,800 --> 00:31:29,120 Speaker 1: like think about it more than that. I'm thinking that 626 00:31:29,200 --> 00:31:32,000 Speaker 1: you might have a story that food should be more 627 00:31:32,040 --> 00:31:35,320 Speaker 1: elaborate with that, and it just doesn't need to be. 628 00:31:35,440 --> 00:31:38,680 Speaker 1: You need to be fed reasonable food, and I think 629 00:31:38,720 --> 00:31:40,720 Speaker 1: that can happen in a very limited amount of time. 630 00:31:41,480 --> 00:31:45,120 Speaker 1: You mentioned this. Scrambled eggs my favorite, like absolutely easiest 631 00:31:45,120 --> 00:31:48,240 Speaker 1: thing ever meal is salmon. Stick it under the broiler, 632 00:31:48,360 --> 00:31:50,400 Speaker 1: like rub olive oil, salt on it, whatever, like it 633 00:31:50,440 --> 00:31:53,160 Speaker 1: takes too whatever you have soy sauce doesn't matter. Green 634 00:31:53,200 --> 00:31:55,000 Speaker 1: beans that you can eat in the microwave, and then 635 00:31:55,080 --> 00:31:57,800 Speaker 1: like if you're really really quick want some, then quick 636 00:31:57,840 --> 00:31:59,920 Speaker 1: take the rice that's already cooked and frozen in myc 637 00:32:00,120 --> 00:32:02,840 Speaker 1: We've got done, and it even looks like relatively like 638 00:32:03,040 --> 00:32:06,200 Speaker 1: elevated and healthy. It's like, you know, three components that 639 00:32:06,240 --> 00:32:09,280 Speaker 1: you made, but it takes five minutes of effort in 640 00:32:09,320 --> 00:32:11,840 Speaker 1: about ten to twelve minutes of microwading and cooking and 641 00:32:11,880 --> 00:32:14,600 Speaker 1: you're done. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Really do not need to 642 00:32:14,600 --> 00:32:17,000 Speaker 1: overthink this, And I think the key is also, don't 643 00:32:17,160 --> 00:32:20,680 Speaker 1: think about it at six o'clock, like have a plan, 644 00:32:20,960 --> 00:32:24,480 Speaker 1: you know if some people I don't necessarily like meal 645 00:32:24,520 --> 00:32:26,320 Speaker 1: planning so much, but I do. We have theme nights 646 00:32:26,320 --> 00:32:28,160 Speaker 1: so we know what we're going to have and so 647 00:32:28,280 --> 00:32:30,520 Speaker 1: then I don't have to think about it. And I 648 00:32:30,520 --> 00:32:32,640 Speaker 1: think it might help for you to spend you know, 649 00:32:32,800 --> 00:32:36,680 Speaker 1: literally just five minutes thinking this through. You know, whoever 650 00:32:36,720 --> 00:32:38,760 Speaker 1: goes to the grocery store, if that's you, you know 651 00:32:38,920 --> 00:32:42,080 Speaker 1: you've procured three frozen meals for the week, plus ingredients 652 00:32:42,080 --> 00:32:43,840 Speaker 1: for two other things, and then I don't know, you 653 00:32:43,960 --> 00:32:45,840 Speaker 1: just figure something out the other nights and you're good, 654 00:32:46,800 --> 00:32:50,360 Speaker 1: all right. So our love of the week, Sarah yours. 655 00:32:50,680 --> 00:32:53,040 Speaker 1: My love of a week will surprise no blog readers 656 00:32:53,080 --> 00:32:57,400 Speaker 1: because it is my new Boden promper. So I have, 657 00:32:57,640 --> 00:32:59,840 Speaker 1: as I said, college reunion. I have a lot of travel. 658 00:33:00,080 --> 00:33:04,000 Speaker 1: I lack like a cute, like going out outfit that's 659 00:33:04,040 --> 00:33:06,840 Speaker 1: also comfortable in summary, and so this fit the bill. 660 00:33:07,000 --> 00:33:10,040 Speaker 1: It's navy blue, it has like pockets. It ties at 661 00:33:10,080 --> 00:33:12,800 Speaker 1: the waist so that gives some definition. It's a great 662 00:33:12,880 --> 00:33:16,600 Speaker 1: length because it's petite and spoiler alert, we did we 663 00:33:16,600 --> 00:33:18,360 Speaker 1: did a little styling session that we're going to be 664 00:33:18,360 --> 00:33:20,680 Speaker 1: talking about in a future episode. And the things that 665 00:33:20,720 --> 00:33:22,960 Speaker 1: this person talked to me about, I was like, yes, no, 666 00:33:23,080 --> 00:33:25,160 Speaker 1: wonder I nailed it with the romper because it like 667 00:33:25,240 --> 00:33:26,960 Speaker 1: checked off all these boxes she talked about. So that 668 00:33:27,040 --> 00:33:30,680 Speaker 1: was cool. Yeah, I love it. I'm excited, excellent. I 669 00:33:30,680 --> 00:33:32,959 Speaker 1: am quite sure I will never wind up in a ramper. 670 00:33:34,000 --> 00:33:38,480 Speaker 1: But never say never. We could probably say never here, 671 00:33:38,880 --> 00:33:41,320 Speaker 1: but I will say my new hammock. I do like 672 00:33:41,360 --> 00:33:43,239 Speaker 1: my new hammock, even if I'm not getting nearly as 673 00:33:43,320 --> 00:33:45,000 Speaker 1: much time in it as I would prefer to have 674 00:33:45,080 --> 00:33:47,960 Speaker 1: in it. It is summary as well, not a ramper, 675 00:33:48,000 --> 00:33:50,480 Speaker 1: but it is also a summary fun thing, so it 676 00:33:50,600 --> 00:33:53,080 Speaker 1: checks those boxes and I am enjoying it all right. Well, 677 00:33:53,080 --> 00:33:56,120 Speaker 1: this has been best of both worlds. We've been talking 678 00:33:56,280 --> 00:33:59,520 Speaker 1: mid life awakenings. We read a letter from a listener 679 00:33:59,560 --> 00:34:02,280 Speaker 1: who is held out people who were perhaps dealing with 680 00:34:02,720 --> 00:34:06,160 Speaker 1: parents going through the early stages of dementia. Some good 681 00:34:06,240 --> 00:34:09,880 Speaker 1: questions about infant temperaments and meal prep. We will be 682 00:34:09,920 --> 00:34:11,799 Speaker 1: back next week with more on making work and life 683 00:34:11,800 --> 00:34:16,720 Speaker 1: fit together. Thanks for listening. You can find me Sarah 684 00:34:16,880 --> 00:34:20,719 Speaker 1: at the shoebox dot com or at the Underscore Shoebox 685 00:34:20,760 --> 00:34:24,520 Speaker 1: on Instagram, and you can find me Laura at Laura 686 00:34:24,600 --> 00:34:27,799 Speaker 1: vandercam dot com. This has been the best of both 687 00:34:27,840 --> 00:34:31,400 Speaker 1: worlds podcasts. Please join us next time for more on 688 00:34:31,480 --> 00:34:33,440 Speaker 1: making work and life work together.