Speaker 1: Fuck cancer.
Speaker 2: Facts ditto. That's the sound bite and the horse it
Speaker 2: rolled in on.
Speaker 3: Wow.
Speaker 1: It all started with real talk, unfiltered, honest and straight
Speaker 1: from the heart. Since then, we've gone on to become
Speaker 1: Webby Award winning podcasters in New York Times bestselling authors.
Speaker 4: Dead Ass was more than a podcast for us. It
Speaker 4: was about our growth, a place where we could be vulnerable.
Speaker 1: Be wrang or, but most apportantly be us.
Speaker 4: But as we know, life keeps evolving, and so do we,
Speaker 4: and through it all, one thing has never changed. This
Speaker 4: is a sever after ass because we got a lot
Speaker 4: to talk about.
Speaker 1: Story time, so I'm gonna take y'all through. This is
Speaker 1: the first time I'm gonna do time jumps in the story. Okay,
Speaker 1: are we gonna start with September twenty twenty five. September
Speaker 1: twenty twenty five, y'all heard this story me and came
Speaker 1: down here with the podcast crew. Pops has a s
Speaker 1: got to fix that. I'm like, yo, I got this.
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. I studied exercise physiology. All
Speaker 1: we gotta do is move the body, get them back.
Speaker 1: I used to work with stroke patients all the time,
Speaker 1: I said, Pops, let's go out, get in the sun.
Speaker 1: Let's move around all September me and Pops moving around
Speaker 1: here getting better. October come up heart failure. I'm like, okay,
Speaker 1: we can get through this. I studied exercise physiology. I
Speaker 1: know what to do. We can go outside in the sun.
Speaker 1: We can get some movement, get this heart moving again,
Speaker 1: get the circulation. We're doing all this, I toob but
Speaker 1: right November comes up cancer. Well, can't work out through that, Bruh.
Speaker 1: Got to actually go to the doctor and get some
Speaker 1: shit done them three months finding out all that information
Speaker 1: about your dad. I'm gonna say something for the first
Speaker 1: time in front of everybody that I never said in
Speaker 1: front of you. I thought Pops was gonna die time. Yes, so.
Speaker 2: My father when he.
Speaker 4: Was on the tail end of things and finished his treatment,
Speaker 4: finished the treatments. I hate to say his treatment and
Speaker 4: his diagnosis because I never claimed that over his life
Speaker 4: it was just a diagnosis and treatments, because I feel
Speaker 4: like when you put the possession on things sometimes it
Speaker 4: makes it feel like it's yours. And I felt like
Speaker 4: it's yeah, and I'm like, it's not it. When he
Speaker 4: finished the treatments associated with his diagnosis, he said to me.
Speaker 4: When I said, Dad, I'm like, yo, you're looking like,
Speaker 4: you know, one percent better every day, Like how are
Speaker 4: you feeling?
Speaker 2: And he said to me, you can't keep a good
Speaker 2: man down.
Speaker 1: Oh I know where you're going with this.
Speaker 5: So when he said that, I was just like bo
Speaker 5: bo bob, because of course I.
Speaker 2: Heard the tune in my head right, so you know this,
Speaker 2: You can't keep a good man down.
Speaker 4: Always keep smile, and they want I'm too frown, keep
Speaker 4: my vibes and used to miground. They can never ever
Speaker 4: take my ground, stolid as a rock.
Speaker 2: They just can't stop you.
Speaker 6: Now you're just cast me.
Speaker 7: Now, No, that was my college when you come out
Speaker 7: to that.
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, Oh my gosh, shout out to Pops.
Speaker 2: Yeah, man, that song could could be.
Speaker 4: Yeah right exactly. It could totally be an anthem for
Speaker 4: so many things. But when he said that to me,
Speaker 4: I was like, bro, you were absolutely right, You're absolutely right.
Speaker 4: And man, did my father ever prove anything to me
Speaker 4: in life?
Speaker 2: This was the time where I was like, wow.
Speaker 1: To you, all of us, yeah.
Speaker 2: All of us, All right, y'all, we'll be back.
Speaker 1: Let me take it back to storytime. I said something
Speaker 1: at the very end of storytime that I know you've
Speaker 1: never heard me say, but I thought Pops was going
Speaker 1: to die. And the reason why just me being honest
Speaker 1: is because remember in two thousand and eleven, I started
Speaker 1: working at Parisi's Speed School. Shout out to Kenny Munson
Speaker 1: and Gary Miller. Kenny Munson was the owner of the
Speaker 1: Parisi Speed School and Gary Miller was a program director
Speaker 1: and at the time they were also trying to find
Speaker 1: ways to bridge the gap between finances and sports performance.
Speaker 1: So during the day, there was a old person's home
Speaker 1: that was that like further down to Staten Island, but
Speaker 1: they needed rehab and all of us had to take
Speaker 1: exercise physiology and kinesiology classes take on NASM to make
Speaker 1: sure that we were good with sports medicine. A lot
Speaker 1: of those elderly people needed to go to rehab after
Speaker 1: they had strokes, so they was like, hey, how about
Speaker 1: you bring them here in the middle of the day.
Speaker 1: There's no students, no kids here, you know, we can
Speaker 1: have our trainers work with them. So for about two
Speaker 1: months I was working with a lot of stroke survivors,
Speaker 1: people who just needed to get their motor functions back.
Speaker 1: And during that time, The biggest thing that I noticed
Speaker 1: is the people who go back with the people who
Speaker 1: wanted to get back the mentality as soon as they
Speaker 1: got here. I'll never forget this one, lady, Myrtle. I
Speaker 1: told you a story about older older Italian woman. Right,
Speaker 1: she comes in and she has the walker and she's
Speaker 1: just like, hey, you know's murder or whatever. And I
Speaker 1: said to her, I said, Myrtle, in two weeks, you
Speaker 1: ain't gonna need that walker. And Myrtle's old as said
Speaker 1: to me, I don't need this bitch now and through it.
Speaker 1: And I said, that's the type of mentality you have
Speaker 1: to have in order to come back from a stroke,
Speaker 1: because you have to believe it. I started believing Dad
Speaker 1: was gonna be okay when I started watching him get
Speaker 1: up on his own, like during chemo and stuff, and
Speaker 1: going to get on his little foot bike, and he
Speaker 1: had his bands and he was stretching his bands out
Speaker 1: every day on his own, like I didn't have to
Speaker 1: come in here and to say nothing. That's when I said, oh,
Speaker 1: he wants to be here. He don't want his grandkids
Speaker 1: to see him like that. He don't want his daughters
Speaker 1: and his son to see him like that Pop's going
Speaker 1: to be all right. And when I think about it now,
Speaker 1: those seven weeks, there was never a moment where we
Speaker 1: had to say, come on, Pops, let's go to treatment.
Speaker 1: He was always ready in the first one to go.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: He's the one who changed my mind about whether or
Speaker 1: not he was going to make it when I watched
Speaker 1: how he attacked it.
Speaker 4: You're absolutely right, because I think we've all had that
Speaker 4: moment where we were like, oh shit, like this is
Speaker 4: like the trifecta of things going on, and I'm like,
Speaker 4: for him at his age seventy three, and I'm not
Speaker 4: gonna disclose all of the other things that he was
Speaker 4: dealing with and still deals with, but just knowing that
Speaker 4: theis the chips were so stacked against him, and it
Speaker 4: was like several doctors from different specialties having to literally
Speaker 4: get together and develop a plan for him through all
Speaker 4: of this, and that definitely helps to have, for example,
Speaker 4: like my mom and my sister, my mom who's a
Speaker 4: retired nurse, my sister an active or is my brother
Speaker 4: in the healthcare field, So everybody bringing their own perspective
Speaker 4: on things being able to advocate for him. But we
Speaker 4: were so confident in the treatment plan that they had
Speaker 4: set forth for him, so that coupled with his attitude,
Speaker 4: I think helped all of us because there was a moment,
Speaker 4: and there were several moments over the past couple months,
Speaker 4: but there was a moment in particular that stands out
Speaker 4: where Deval and I were sitting outside just kind of
Speaker 4: in silence but with each other, and then my mom
Speaker 4: came outside in the front yeah, and we just all
Speaker 4: kind of sat there for a minute, and it was
Speaker 4: like a collective cry because we didn't want to do
Speaker 4: it in the house around dad, because it doesn't help
Speaker 4: to have all those emotions flowing when someone's actually dealing
Speaker 4: with this. But we just didn't know how to cope,
Speaker 4: and it felt like we had moments where we individually
Speaker 4: were trying to cope without burdening the others with it,
Speaker 4: and collectively in that moment, it just kind of happened
Speaker 4: where we all just kind of let.
Speaker 2: It loose and just talked to about how.
Speaker 4: We were going to be able to manage what the
Speaker 4: next couple of weeks would look like. And I realized,
Speaker 4: I think in that conversation and even talking to Deval
Speaker 4: consecutively after that for the next couple of days, we
Speaker 4: were so concerned about the things that were what ifs,
Speaker 4: and I found myself being so worried about, like, what
Speaker 4: if we don't have dad, what if we have to.
Speaker 2: Explain to the kids xyz. What if he never comes
Speaker 2: back from this?
Speaker 4: What if his quality of life is going to be
Speaker 4: so drastically changed that he's not even going to be
Speaker 4: motivated to want to get back. And I had to
Speaker 4: stop for a second, and your dad is actually the
Speaker 4: person who gave me a big hug, because he was
Speaker 4: in town back and forth as well too, but he.
Speaker 2: Gave me a big hug one day when he.
Speaker 4: Was about to leave, and he said, one day at
Speaker 4: a time, one hour at a time, stopped stressing over
Speaker 4: the things that could potentially be, and let's deal with
Speaker 4: what's actually happening. And I was like, and it was
Speaker 4: probably the way he said it too, because you know
Speaker 4: your dad, he's like a big teddy bear, and he
Speaker 4: said it with such compassion in that moment that I
Speaker 4: was like.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Yadi, and troy ellis, yeah, yeah, it.
Speaker 2: Might have been that.
Speaker 5: You know.
Speaker 2: It was the way he hugged me. And then he
Speaker 2: looked at.
Speaker 4: Me and he was just like stop worrying about what
Speaker 4: could potentially happen. Let's deal with what's actually happening. He said,
Speaker 4: you're going to stress yourself out with all of the
Speaker 4: what ifs, And I was like, you know what, that
Speaker 4: makes so much sense. You know, but I think it's
Speaker 4: human nature for you to just think about all of
Speaker 4: the possible worst case scenarios as a defense mechanism to
Speaker 4: prepare yourself with what may potentially come. So that was
Speaker 4: a moment where I felt like, Okay, this can be manageable.
Speaker 1: I think it's important to tell people, like how the
Speaker 1: diagnosis came and what happens when it comes to cancer.
Speaker 1: A lot of people don't know what happens. They just think, oh,
Speaker 1: you got cancer and now you're going to die. Dad
Speaker 1: went through first. He went and got how they discovered
Speaker 1: the cancer at first?
Speaker 8: Was it up?
Speaker 4: So you know, after the stroke, it was almost and
Speaker 4: it's almost like crazy how things happened because.
Speaker 2: He had the lump in his neck.
Speaker 1: But it saved his life, It really did.
Speaker 4: Because he had the lump in his neck, but he
Speaker 4: thought maybe it was a stollen tonsil. You know, it
Speaker 4: was kind of on and off for a couple months,
Speaker 4: but it started to get a bit bigger, and when
Speaker 4: he had the stroke, of course they do an MRI
Speaker 4: and they do all these different scans, cat scan, this,
Speaker 4: that the third and it was in that MRI that
Speaker 4: they realized what it was. Based on the MRI results,
Speaker 4: they were able to tell that it was likely with
Speaker 4: a very high percentage oral fled jill cancer so at
Speaker 4: the base of the tongue that had spread to the
Speaker 4: lymph node in his neck on the left side.
Speaker 2: So that's what he was feeling.
Speaker 1: Which whenever you hear that a cancer spread to the
Speaker 1: lymph node, you automatically assumed death. Had we had dealt
Speaker 1: with this before with alcion, where once they told us
Speaker 1: that the cancer spread to the lymphos, all of the
Speaker 1: prognosis from the doctors was like, oh, there's nothing we
Speaker 1: can do. So when we had heard the dad's cancer
Speaker 1: had spread to the lymph node, at first I was like, well,
Speaker 1: they could cut it out, but then he would have
Speaker 1: no base of his tongue. How does he eat, how
Speaker 1: does he drink? How does he speak? And then the
Speaker 1: doctor was saying like, well, he's at a point in
Speaker 1: his life now where he can't have the surgery to
Speaker 1: take it out, but he could get chemo and radiation
Speaker 1: and they can shrink it enough to where it can
Speaker 1: disappear and go away. And I think that the doctor
Speaker 1: said that there was like a ninety eight chance of
Speaker 1: ninety eight percent chance of recovery even though he was
Speaker 1: still stage three. So a lot of times when people
Speaker 1: here stage three cancer, they think it's a death sentence.
Speaker 1: And the reason why I think it's important for us
Speaker 1: to tell the story is because Dad gave me hope
Speaker 1: for what's possible right seventy three. Dad isn't a workout warrior.
Speaker 4: I've never seen my dad run in life ever, Like
Speaker 4: I've never seen my father run. And I said to myself,
Speaker 4: wait a second, I asked my brother, I asked my sister.
Speaker 4: My father has never I've never seen him run, like.
Speaker 2: I promise you it was.
Speaker 6: Barret the thing.
Speaker 1: But that's the truth. Though, if he gonna move somewhere,
Speaker 1: it's gonna.
Speaker 4: Be yeah, for sure. But my father doesn't run. So
Speaker 4: it's funny even dealing with some of his heart things.
Speaker 4: When he goes to the doctor and they're like, are
Speaker 4: you feeling shortness of birth? Are you feeling this? He's like, no, no, nope,
Speaker 4: I'm final he would never be short of breath because
Speaker 4: he didn't move fast enough to ever be short of breath,
Speaker 4: you know. So some of these things were like not
Speaker 4: the best baseline or not the best gauge because like
Speaker 4: that is not active.
Speaker 1: So you figured this stroke and then the heart attack,
Speaker 1: well not the heart attack. His heart is operating at
Speaker 1: twenty six percent correct, it was like thirty five thirty five,
Speaker 1: which is like that's one third of where your heart's
Speaker 1: supposed to be operating. So in my mind, when we
Speaker 1: hear someone's going through that and that and they have
Speaker 1: to get chemo, which pretty much takes all of the
Speaker 1: nutrients out of you, it destroys everything. It destroys the
Speaker 1: good and the bad. But those who destroys all the
Speaker 1: good things, It's like he's supposed to be recovering from
Speaker 1: a stroke in his heart, but now we're going to
Speaker 1: put chemo. I did not think there was a way
Speaker 1: possible for him to get through this. And we did
Speaker 1: get through this, and there were things that we did
Speaker 1: extra as a family that everybody can't do. But I
Speaker 1: do want to talk about.
Speaker 4: This right and as a disclaimer too, we understand that
Speaker 4: everyone's prognosis is different.
Speaker 2: Yes, everyone's who has cancer. Anyone who has cancer.
Speaker 4: I should say things are different, like treatments are different,
Speaker 4: options are different. Because there was a point where I'm like,
Speaker 4: do we go the holistic right route? Do I, you know,
Speaker 4: send them to Mexico to this treatment center? Like what
Speaker 4: is it that would be the best outcome? Would garner
Speaker 4: the best outcome? But we also wanted to charge him
Speaker 4: with the autonomy over his life and his prognosis to
Speaker 4: say this is what I want to do.
Speaker 2: It was his decision.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because Kadina and I also thought about manage seventy three.
Speaker 1: If you're going, you know, your heart is only a
Speaker 1: third of percent and you're coming off a stroke, maybe
Speaker 1: it would be best for us not to put him
Speaker 1: through chemo and radiation if that's going to make his
Speaker 1: quality of life bad for the you know, the future.
Speaker 1: So we thought about that, but then at the same
Speaker 1: time we were like, yo, it's not our life, it's
Speaker 1: his life. There's no right or wrong answer. What you
Speaker 1: have to do is allow people to make their decisions
Speaker 1: for their life and support them one thousand percent so
Speaker 1: that they can feel like I did everything in my power.
Speaker 1: So ultimately that's what we chose because that said, Yo,
Speaker 1: I want to get radiation and chemo and get this
Speaker 1: done with right.
Speaker 2: And they believe it was seven weeks.
Speaker 1: Seven weeks there you go five.
Speaker 4: Days radiation, one of those days chemo, So it's not
Speaker 4: like he was getting chemo every day. But the purpose
Speaker 4: of it was to try to weaken the tumor so
Speaker 4: that way it'd be easier for the radiation to kill it.
Speaker 1: Now, there are things that I do want to talk
Speaker 1: about that I know because we did some outside stuff helped.
Speaker 1: All of the things I've read about tumors, whether it
Speaker 1: be in textbooks, whether it be online, whether it be TikTok.
Speaker 1: Sunlight and sugar, Well, sugar helps tumors grow. The more
Speaker 1: sugar you eat, no matter where the tumor is, what
Speaker 1: it is, it helps the tumor grow. Sunlight and oxygen
Speaker 1: kills tumors. So for me, I told, okay, man, if
Speaker 1: there's one thing we can do with this, Pops can't
Speaker 1: drink no more, no more cokes, no more alcohol, no
Speaker 1: more sugar in the catch up dairy, Like, we really
Speaker 1: all have to be super disciplined about cutting out the
Speaker 1: sugar at least for seven weeks while we go through this.
Speaker 1: That's something we're going to do in this house. So
Speaker 1: if you look at his house now, if you look
Speaker 1: at the bar, there's no alcohol on that bar, period.
Speaker 1: And this is the first time in six years that
Speaker 1: that bar isn't stock full.
Speaker 2: Actually you actually I didn't even realize that before I
Speaker 2: realized this more.
Speaker 9: Yeah, but how is that adjustment for him? The sugar
Speaker 9: and the alcohol.
Speaker 1: Well, at first, in a very very beginning, it was
Speaker 1: an adjustment because he would come up to me and
Speaker 1: he'd be like, you know, you know your mother says
Speaker 1: this alcohol, I tinket is to drinking.
Speaker 3: My friends.
Speaker 1: Some of my friends, they drink more than me and
Speaker 1: they don't have no stupid cancer. That's how he would
Speaker 1: talk to me. And I know he was trying to
Speaker 1: rationalize the fact that he should still have a drink.
Speaker 1: And sometimes I'd be like, man, he's seventy three years old, Like,
Speaker 1: let him have a drink. But then I would look
Speaker 1: over at him and I would look at his grandkid
Speaker 1: my kids, and be like, nah, bro, like now you
Speaker 1: have a responsibility to fight this the best way you
Speaker 1: can because your grandkids are watching, My kids are watching,
Speaker 1: and I'm not gonna have them coming home and seeing
Speaker 1: that Granddad go to chemo, go to radiation, come home
Speaker 1: and have a drink and then get smaller and.
Speaker 2: Smaller, defeating the purpose.
Speaker 4: And what also didn't help was with this particular cancer,
Speaker 4: in the treatment that he got, his swallow became painful,
Speaker 4: his mouth developed sores.
Speaker 2: So just anything ingesting orally was a problem for him.
Speaker 4: Yeah, So after week four or five, which is when
Speaker 4: they said it would start to impact him, his appetite
Speaker 4: decreased drastically.
Speaker 2: He was no longer able to eat orally.
Speaker 4: So we had to get a feeding tube for him
Speaker 4: to be able to feed him through the tube. Now
Speaker 4: that we're almost four weeks out of ringing the bell,
Speaker 4: he's slowly starting to get that function back.
Speaker 2: So he would he would try to push through it.
Speaker 4: My sister, being like that firm nurse but also compassionate,
Speaker 4: was able to poke him.
Speaker 1: Tell the truth, Tell the truth. Sakari is a drill
Speaker 1: sergeants as much as I am on the boys. That's
Speaker 1: how Sakari is when it comes to medicine. And this
Speaker 1: is her dad. I watched them when you was away
Speaker 1: filming and I was watching. She was like, I don't
Speaker 1: care you have to do this, dad, Remember the g tube.
Speaker 1: She was telling him from beginning to get that's what happens. Yeah,
Speaker 1: she was like, no, you're gonna do.
Speaker 2: This seeing another side of things.
Speaker 1: She was on top of everything like that whatever, and
Speaker 1: she was unapriogetic about the fact.
Speaker 2: That you have to do this.
Speaker 4: He's like, She's like, do you want to be able
Speaker 4: to eat and swallow again in life or do you
Speaker 4: want that muscle reflex to atrophy?
Speaker 2: You're going to have to try to swallow some.
Speaker 1: Of this, will use it. She was She wasn't playing,
Speaker 1: And that's part of the thing that we need to
Speaker 1: talk about too. When someone is going through this, there
Speaker 1: has to be someone in the family who is not
Speaker 1: going to concede to that person's feelings. It's easy to
Speaker 1: concede to that person's feelings all the time because is
Speaker 1: they're going through something and you want to be empathetic.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Like I was the one that was like, all right, dad, Well, like,
Speaker 4: if you don't want to, it's okay.
Speaker 2: It's funny too.
Speaker 4: How us three children dealt with it differently. My brother
Speaker 4: is the director of mission at a nursing home, so
Speaker 4: he sees the worst of people. He sees them after falling,
Speaker 4: he sees them when they're in rehab. So Tristan was like,
Speaker 4: I don't want to see it, complete disconnect.
Speaker 2: That's not my dad.
Speaker 4: You know how everyone revers their father in a certain light.
Speaker 4: He's like, I don't want to see my dad like that.
Speaker 4: So at first I was just like, dude, where's this nigga?
Speaker 4: Like he can't book a flight to come down here too,
Speaker 4: But then I also realized when he did finally book
Speaker 4: his flight to come he just he dealt with it
Speaker 4: very differently, whereas Sakari was like, all right, well, I'm
Speaker 4: gonna have to do all these things, and I was kind.
Speaker 2: Of somewhere in the middle. I was like, Dad, you know,
Speaker 2: I'm here, bruh. Whatever you need, let me know. As
Speaker 2: long as it doesn't have to deal with anything squeamish,
Speaker 2: I'm good. Like I'm not the skywish type.
Speaker 4: Wipe up my toomb and I don't no feed into
Speaker 4: but I'll be here to chill with you and put
Speaker 4: on your favorite shows and we'll sit and we'll you know,
Speaker 4: at one point he wasn't talking, just so you know
Speaker 4: that that is all.
Speaker 1: Very very important, because even even when I was helping
Speaker 1: stroke victims at Parisi. There was times that they would
Speaker 1: bring their kids and grandkids to help them want to
Speaker 1: move more like if a nurse came with them, it
Speaker 1: was just like, nah, this this one is struggling, but
Speaker 1: we brought someone with them to be a pet and
Speaker 1: emotional support animal. Like y, it's not just about the
Speaker 1: medical aspect. There was a human aspect of trying to
Speaker 1: survive cancer that they all need. Like they don't just
Speaker 1: need to go to the doctor and see medical professionals,
Speaker 1: they need family and support. I watched and even when
Speaker 1: people that dad knew and loved that wasn't family come around,
Speaker 1: how he would like perk up. Then before you know it,
Speaker 1: he walking around. You haven't walked in two days. But
Speaker 1: now because triple here, you want to show trible something
Speaker 1: like people who go through those things need that your
Speaker 1: brother coming when he did, you being able to take
Speaker 1: them to go through stuff, taking them outside to sit
Speaker 1: in the sun. Yeah, Susie, Auntie, Susie.
Speaker 2: Susie, my favorite girl. She came into town.
Speaker 1: Yep, he kept you.
Speaker 4: My dad's sister came. She's brother her my uncle Grantly,
Speaker 4: So look at timing. So my uncle was an interness
Speaker 4: here in Georgia for years. He was like the first
Speaker 4: iteration of my family to come down here. He had
Speaker 4: three sons with him and his wife. She's a pediatrician.
Speaker 4: He's an internis and he just retired December thirty first
Speaker 4: of twenty twenty five, so literally the perfect time.
Speaker 2: And Dad started treatment on the sixth of January.
Speaker 4: And that's his brother, so my uncle was able to
Speaker 4: take him to and from and care for him and
Speaker 4: also be that advocate, be that medical professional who sat
Speaker 4: with Dad, advocate for the things.
Speaker 2: That he needed.
Speaker 4: At one point, Dad realized, like he hated that the
Speaker 4: benadryl was making him super drowsy on the keybo days.
Speaker 4: So my uncle was like, how about we lessen the
Speaker 4: dosage And Dad was like, that's better because he hated
Speaker 4: feeling so groggy. That that also showed though that my
Speaker 4: dad is so tough, because it's like most people could
Speaker 4: probably be like, you know, give me the ben a
Speaker 4: drool so I don't feel anything, and my dad was like, Noah,
Speaker 4: give me like half the dose because I could. I
Speaker 4: could manage this, you know. I was like, wow, that
Speaker 4: was just amazing.
Speaker 1: You see the importance of having an advocate. We talk
Speaker 1: about this all the time with black maternal health and
Speaker 1: how important is for black women to have an advocate
Speaker 1: when they're going through labor and delivery in the hospital.
Speaker 1: It's the same thing for anybody who's going through something
Speaker 1: like this. You need an advocate because when you're emotionally
Speaker 1: spent from being the person to deal with this and
Speaker 1: doctors are telling you got to take this, it becomes
Speaker 1: overwhelming and after a while it's like, you know what,
Speaker 1: whatever y'all say, I'll do. You need someone outside of
Speaker 1: that to say, hey, my father, my mom doesn't need that.
Speaker 1: They need this right. And I think that that was
Speaker 1: important for Dad because he had a lot of advocates
Speaker 1: who had a lot of information on top of everybody.
Speaker 1: And I say that because it's not good enough to
Speaker 1: just leave your loved ones with medical care professionals say hey,
Speaker 1: y'all figure it out.
Speaker 2: It's on us for sure.
Speaker 4: And shout out to his team, like the people over
Speaker 4: at Emery Proton Therapy. It was they were amazing center
Speaker 4: for his type of cancer. And I mean, he couldn't
Speaker 4: speak enough about how great they were to him. So
Speaker 4: shout out to his team for taking great care of him.
Speaker 4: When he was winding down to the last treatment, he
Speaker 4: was like, I want to get a little something for
Speaker 4: like the nurses and the people who helped me. So
Speaker 4: went to the liquor store, shout out to our liquors store,
Speaker 4: Previnstagvine and Spirits, and just got some wine. And he
Speaker 4: was able to distribute the bottle of wine just to
Speaker 4: say thank you to everyone for like, you know, being
Speaker 4: there with him.
Speaker 2: And I'd be remiss if I didn't shout out the
Speaker 2: kids Man Cast the Cairo, Cairo.
Speaker 4: Deacon Dakota, Deacon Dakota, Deacon Dakota, and Past the Cairo
Speaker 4: specifically them too, because it's so funny.
Speaker 2: There's their personalities are so very similar.
Speaker 4: And Dakota would put on praise and worship music on YouTube.
Speaker 2: He would find like all his favorite praise and worship songs.
Speaker 4: And he's like, Pop, I'm going to sing for you today,
Speaker 4: and he'd be like, pray.
Speaker 2: The Lord, oh my soul.
Speaker 4: And then there's another there's another song that Cairo liked.
Speaker 4: I think the Battle, the Battle.
Speaker 2: Belongs to You. That was another one he would play
Speaker 2: for my dad every day.
Speaker 1: They played every day.
Speaker 4: They literally would come home from school and like sing
Speaker 4: for him, and Cairo had the entire school praying for
Speaker 4: my dad in Bible class.
Speaker 2: He wrote a no I posted it all my stories
Speaker 2: on Instagram.
Speaker 4: It might have been on my close friends, but he
Speaker 4: pretty much in the prayer was saying, you know, Lord,
Speaker 4: please heal my grandfather because I want more time with him.
Speaker 1: Wow.
Speaker 4: So it's just been amazing to see how the kids
Speaker 4: have been using their faith to be able to envelope.
Speaker 2: My dad in like the best care and hallelujahs.
Speaker 1: They was downstairs yep, recording like this is just them
Speaker 1: without them knowing they were doing this. Mm, that's dope.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so they really were rallying.
Speaker 4: Dakota would sit next to Dad and sometimes Dad will
Speaker 4: be watching whatever show he used to like watch cooking
Speaker 4: shows on TV and stuff, and the.
Speaker 2: Quota would be like Papa. He was like yeah you okay,
Speaker 2: okay then or Dad be like yeah, I'm okay, you good.
Speaker 2: He's like, yeah, you good. He was like, it's just
Speaker 2: a touch base. It's just a touch base.
Speaker 4: And I really truly think that that helped my dad
Speaker 4: get through. I tell y'all the story about when I
Speaker 4: took them to see Santa and what Santa's interaction was
Speaker 4: with Cairo. So took them to see Santa a day
Speaker 4: or two before Christmas this year. At this point we knew,
Speaker 4: the boys knew that dad had cancer and he was dealing.
Speaker 2: With all the things.
Speaker 4: So we get to Santa's house, they each get time
Speaker 4: what Santa just sit and of course when Cairo goes up,
Speaker 4: Santa's like, hey, you know, Cairo, how are you? You know,
Speaker 4: what do you want for Christmas? And He's just like,
Speaker 4: I really want my grandfather to get healed from cancer.
Speaker 4: So Santa looked at him and he was just like wow.
Speaker 4: He was like, that's that's really nice that you're using
Speaker 4: your Christmas wish to get your grandfather feeling better.
Speaker 2: And he's like, you know, I really believe that your
Speaker 2: grandfather is going to be okay.
Speaker 4: And then Santo reached into his pocket and took out
Speaker 4: a little figurine and it was Jesus and he gave
Speaker 4: it to Cairo and he said, I'm going to give
Speaker 4: this to you today and you keep this with your
Speaker 4: with yourself, or you can give it to your grandpa
Speaker 4: and just let him know that Santa is.
Speaker 2: Praying for him too.
Speaker 4: And Cairo came home and then gave Dad the little
Speaker 4: Jesus figurine and told him to keep it in his
Speaker 4: pocket when he went for treatment, and my dad kept
Speaker 4: it with him the whole time after in those seven weeks.
Speaker 1: I just have a question. Was it black or I
Speaker 1: want to mess up the story, But I was thinking,
Speaker 1: did Jesus Jesus?
Speaker 2: Did Jesus have locks?
Speaker 1: Looked like Jesus? I always thinking, I'm glad.
Speaker 4: I gotta go to be honest. I didn't even look
Speaker 4: close enough at it, but it was.
Speaker 1: A us.
Speaker 3: Real.
Speaker 4: I was thinking that we recently had talked with the
Speaker 4: boys about this stuff too.
Speaker 1: That a whole another pot. That's a whole another pot.
Speaker 9: Unblack and I mean white and Jesus, yeah white in
Speaker 9: Jesus for real facts.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's that's a whole. That's a whole, nother pot.
Speaker 2: It sound like boys about it.
Speaker 1: Well, Cairo Kyro like when you called him Deacon d Coda,
Speaker 1: because my father's a deacon and he used to visit
Speaker 1: the second shutting Dakota would come as soon as you
Speaker 1: come home from school, he come inside, Papa, what you watching, Papa?
Speaker 1: You want to put something else on? I'm like, you
Speaker 1: come in here like you can't take it. He changing
Speaker 1: the channel, he's rubbing Papa head.
Speaker 2: Literally, I'm just like, don't come over here with no offering.
Speaker 2: Plate broke because nobody asked. Nobody asked you.
Speaker 1: But the other thing was Kiro taking Pops to the
Speaker 1: hyper barry chamber.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah he did.
Speaker 1: So we And this is also the fact that.
Speaker 2: You're even invested in that for the house, not knowing
Speaker 2: that we would.
Speaker 1: Need now divine intervention. Right, Why things happen? How twenty ten?
Speaker 1: I have to study exercise physiology and work with rehab
Speaker 1: patients to finish my NASM stroke patients. Dad has a stroke. Right,
Speaker 1: last year I bought a hyper break chamber to help
Speaker 1: us with recovery with all the workouts and stuff we
Speaker 1: were doing. And now we find out that oxygen is
Speaker 1: like the best way to get rid of tumors. So
Speaker 1: we actually have a hyperbaric chamber in our house. It's
Speaker 1: like pure things were happening and putting out place in
Speaker 1: order to help protect that. And that's why I get like,
Speaker 1: I get real serious when it comes to like divine
Speaker 1: intervention because some of these things you say, it's like,
Speaker 1: there's no reason why we would have that, right, and
Speaker 1: like why would Uncle Grantly retire in December and the
Speaker 1: dad start treatment January?
Speaker 2: Literally?
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, like that reprieve was necessary.
Speaker 4: And my sister having flexibility with her job to be
Speaker 4: able to work from home and come down here for
Speaker 4: periods at a time to help dad.
Speaker 1: You know, I feel you.
Speaker 4: No truly one hundred percent believe that it's all happened
Speaker 4: the way it should be. That like that, After this,
Speaker 4: I feel like, is, bro, what's what's your new least
Speaker 4: on life?
Speaker 2: Like you're here for a reason. What are you here for?
Speaker 2: What are we doing? Because we're not going back to
Speaker 2: the bottle.
Speaker 4: So it's like the whole lifestyle change I think for
Speaker 4: all of us that we can do together and support.
Speaker 1: Of each other. This is the biggest thing I want
Speaker 1: to leave. This is the thing I want to leave
Speaker 1: people with. When I found out popside cancer, there were
Speaker 1: certain things that we did, and I want to make
Speaker 1: sure that people, whether you have cancer or not, can
Speaker 1: change your lifestyle. Right. The first thing that, the very
Speaker 1: very very first thing is limit and cut your sugar. Right.
Speaker 1: We have become labeled parents. Label parents are the parents
Speaker 1: that pick something up before they put it in their pantry.
Speaker 1: And they read the labels to see if there are
Speaker 1: things in those labels that are not good for them
Speaker 1: and their kids.
Speaker 4: We have become labeled, yeah, becoming I'm semi crunchy mom.
Speaker 4: They call them crunchy mom. It's when you like, read
Speaker 4: all the labels and they are crunchy.
Speaker 6: You need to get your super room.
Speaker 7: You know what.
Speaker 2: There's a starting pack, I'm sure for the crunchy moms.
Speaker 2: The next thing I need to do it.
Speaker 4: The next thing I need to do is probably home
Speaker 4: to school of kids and start gardening and the homestead.
Speaker 1: I'm on all of that. Getting a farm.
Speaker 2: You can get two golds, to cows, to chicken.
Speaker 1: Be alright.
Speaker 2: I would love to move off the grid. Yes, get
Speaker 2: off the grid.
Speaker 7: That is my dream to just have a commune with
Speaker 7: people off the grid where we are our own food.
Speaker 6: You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: Make everything there absolutely.
Speaker 1: Sounds like the islands and drik about it.
Speaker 6: Yeah, exactly, that's.
Speaker 2: The place for me.
Speaker 5: I know.
Speaker 2: I'm I'm supposed to be there. I meant to be there.
Speaker 2: I totally that already. It's probably in our wheel.
Speaker 4: Put the terms together, but cream cremate me and put
Speaker 4: half of me in Jamaica and half in savings it's
Speaker 4: crazy or in the sea in between both.
Speaker 1: Well, you're gonna have to tell somebody else to do
Speaker 1: it because I'm dying before you, because there's your way,
Speaker 1: you die before me. But there's no there's no way.
Speaker 1: The minute you die, I'm going to I'm gonna be like, Yo.
Speaker 1: So what was what we're doing? You been telling them
Speaker 1: kids that I ain't spreading you nowhere. I'm the only
Speaker 1: thing I spread. I've been spread up. You feel me.
Speaker 1: It's the only thing I'm gonna be spread.
Speaker 2: In this life and in every life thereafter.
Speaker 1: So there's no sugar. The second one is movement. We've
Speaker 1: been big on this. You have to get up and
Speaker 1: move every day. That means you have to walk continuously
Speaker 1: on an incline for twenty minutes, run, lift some heavy weight.
Speaker 1: But I really, I'm really big on the lymphatic drainage.
Speaker 2: Have you seen Mimi lately? Far?
Speaker 4: I listened the video me me with these boys doing
Speaker 4: track warm ups and workouts.
Speaker 2: Okay, I want to.
Speaker 1: Say, nothing's sixty. I've seen what I've seen some real
Speaker 1: talk me, me can get it. I went to this page.
Speaker 1: He was thirty two I'm like, she's sixty.
Speaker 4: Eight seven, cybar, she'll be sixty eight this year. She's
Speaker 4: just like she's six. But no, seriously, like my mom
Speaker 4: like like I have no excuse, Like that's my genetics,
Speaker 4: you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: Look I look at her. She had three kids, not
Speaker 2: one stretch mark.
Speaker 4: So I'm like, thank God for that, because that's probably
Speaker 4: why I'm able to make it.
Speaker 2: I have a couple. But you know, she's me, me, me, don't.
Speaker 1: On any stretch marks.
Speaker 2: But I like this, they like, this is what it is.
Speaker 2: At this point, I learned to live. I've learned to
Speaker 2: live with it.
Speaker 6: Honey.
Speaker 4: I'm like, four kids, no, no sugar movement, sunlight.
Speaker 1: We have to start getting out and getting in the sun.
Speaker 1: And then you don't have to be in the sun
Speaker 1: for thirteen fourteen hours. Wake up in the morning, get
Speaker 1: you a little cup of tea, and go sit on
Speaker 1: your lawn for like thirty minutes. That's it, every day,
Speaker 1: just thirty minutes. And that leads me to my last
Speaker 1: one is oxygen. We need oxygen. Our body thrives off
Speaker 1: of oxygen. And because of pollution and because we spend
Speaker 1: so much time inside the house, we don't get the
Speaker 1: type of sun light and oxygen our body needs to thrive.
Speaker 1: So if you think about that, just fighting cancer and
Speaker 1: trying to fight tumors, if you limit sugar, if you move,
Speaker 1: you get outside, you limit dairy, and you get son
Speaker 1: and oxygen, you give yourself a better chance of not
Speaker 1: getting a tumor, or if you have one, shrinking it
Speaker 1: on its own. So for me, you know, part of
Speaker 1: the reason why I wore this shirt is because fuck
Speaker 1: cancer and fuck them tumors. I'm not going to wait
Speaker 1: until I get one to start living my life like
Speaker 1: I want to get rid of them. I'm going to
Speaker 1: live my life now that way, so that if one comes,
Speaker 1: I'll be prepared for it, you know, because you don't
Speaker 1: know what well, you know, God forbid, but you don't
Speaker 1: know what you know, what the world has, well, what
Speaker 1: life has in store.
Speaker 4: For you, and the fact that they're trying to kill
Speaker 4: us anyway, the food, the air, it's just in everything
Speaker 4: in the water, it's it's absolutely we just try to
Speaker 4: control the things that we can control. And again, everyone's
Speaker 4: journey is different. We're not saying we don't profess to
Speaker 4: know everything. We're simply just sharing what the resources that
Speaker 4: we've used that we have too, just to help combat things,
Speaker 4: you know, and to help with the process of Dad now,
Speaker 4: for example, done with treatment getting better every single day.
Speaker 4: And I mean he wanted to get up the other
Speaker 4: day and cook some pillow.
Speaker 1: Cook some point.
Speaker 2: I know, I joked about Dad always making pillowing. We
Speaker 2: have not had pillow in.
Speaker 4: Like three months, okay, And he's been watching Shout out
Speaker 4: to Jamaica Food Boss.
Speaker 2: I hit him up.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I hit him up because we were supposed to
Speaker 4: link up with him and have an excursion like two
Speaker 4: years ago, and then we ended up not being able
Speaker 4: to do it.
Speaker 2: But Dad's been enjoying watching his show.
Speaker 1: So you hit up the Jamaican food boys.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Let me explain something to y'all about my wife. Right,
Speaker 1: what Jackson in twenty and twenty was a big Bronni
Speaker 1: James fan contact because Bronnie was making his way through
Speaker 1: au and doing this thing.
Speaker 2: Lived in LA at the time.
Speaker 1: In La, and Case says, guess what, so what look
Speaker 1: at this. It's a happy birthday video from Brownie.
Speaker 4: To Jackson Jamaica Tony, And I'm like, what, yes, yes,
Speaker 4: because it was a COVID birthday. So we couldn't do anything.
Speaker 4: It was that April.
Speaker 3: Give yourself credit.
Speaker 1: You just reach out to Lebron and Savannah and be like, hey,
Speaker 1: is Brounie available to get us?
Speaker 4: Like who does the Like Yeah, Savannah, I think that's
Speaker 4: when we started kind of like talking randomly, and She's like, absolutely,
Speaker 4: I would love to like help make Jackson's birthday special.
Speaker 1: You have a gift for people, for people to just
Speaker 1: be accepting to you reaching out to because I'm pretty
Speaker 1: sure she probably gets the same d M from thousands
Speaker 1: of people every day. Think about it.
Speaker 3: Can you contact like.
Speaker 1: Her from that?
Speaker 2: Alright? Let me know, let me.
Speaker 1: Gut knows somebody come back.
Speaker 7: Yeah, because I think the DM to Michelle the other day,
Speaker 7: we're going me and my step mom are going.
Speaker 2: To see I Love this week. Yes, So I reached.
Speaker 7: Out to her like, hey, it's my step mom's first
Speaker 7: outing since my dad died.
Speaker 6: But I don't have the I don't have the Kadeen Jin.
Speaker 2: The dam Slider.
Speaker 4: Recently, I got oh my god, y'all, yes, thank you
Speaker 4: for mind to be Matt. I got dad's favorite wrestler.
Speaker 4: So I'm let me tell y'all. My father don't like nothing, really,
Speaker 4: he really don't like.
Speaker 2: He don't like much of it, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: But he loves wrestling.
Speaker 4: That's actually been a thing since I was a kid,
Speaker 4: Like we would watch wrestling and stuff together. So the
Speaker 4: boys already no Monday Night Raw comes on, all.
Speaker 2: That they have to make sure.
Speaker 4: Yeah, since I was a kid, that's how I knew
Speaker 4: about w w F all of the wrestlers, Macho Man.
Speaker 2: Randy Savage, all of them Undertaker like.
Speaker 5: But that's.
Speaker 4: So shout out to Bianca Bellier, his absolute favorite wrestler.
Speaker 4: So me and Matt went with him to a w
Speaker 4: w E show that she had given us tickets for
Speaker 4: because she knew that dad was a huge fan of her.
Speaker 1: People.
Speaker 4: Yeah, just really sweet her her husband, and I forget
Speaker 4: how did I reach out to her?
Speaker 2: I think I did reach out to her on the side.
Speaker 4: It's like, hey girl, my dad loves the show, like
Speaker 4: I would love to bring him in, and she got
Speaker 4: a ticket, got to take him backstage to meet her after.
Speaker 4: So I reached out to her because as he's of
Speaker 4: course going through all his treatment, the one thing he
Speaker 4: was watching was Jamaica footballs and wrestling. So I hit
Speaker 4: her up and it turns out she's been on the
Speaker 4: hiatus and well because she had to have surgery. But
Speaker 4: she sent him a note, a message, a video one.
Speaker 1: It is bat of w W E. I just want
Speaker 1: to make a video for you because I know you've
Speaker 1: been going through some things. I want you to know
Speaker 1: that you've been in my mind.
Speaker 2: We've been praying for you over here.
Speaker 1: We've been sitting so many prayers up for you.
Speaker 10: Once you know that you are the toughest and you're
Speaker 10: going to get through this, and when you get better,
Speaker 10: we're gonna get.
Speaker 2: You to a show. So sweet, so thank you. Beyond
Speaker 2: that that meant everything to him. He was talking back
Speaker 2: to you and the video girls.
Speaker 4: She thought he thought it was a face signed many,
Speaker 4: but he was so happy.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say this, when I was growing up, they
Speaker 1: didn't make female wrestlers like that. It's the only one.
Speaker 4: To six eight, like she was super tall and just big.
Speaker 1: Yeah no, not no more so. Now what they're doing
Speaker 1: is these women are athletes, their volleyball players, track stars
Speaker 1: like they're real athletes. They be jumping and flipping off
Speaker 1: the thing. See them and they look great doing the
Speaker 1: girl shout out to the w W I like the
Speaker 1: little switch. I did that shout out for keeping my
Speaker 1: dad entertained and happy. He watches every single day.
Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, you.
Speaker 4: Know Monday is live on Netflix, like okay, and he
Speaker 4: sure does to call.
Speaker 2: It be like Netflix.
Speaker 5: Monday Night Ball.
Speaker 4: Sound just like that too, he said, Oh my gosh,
Speaker 4: it is so funny, and shout out to Matt Man.
Speaker 2: Matt has literally been here with us day in and
Speaker 2: day out through all of this. And I thought about it.
Speaker 4: When I went upstairs because we talked about the episode
Speaker 4: of you know us coming back. But Matt has been
Speaker 4: like a staple and like stationary in the house too.
Speaker 4: And you bring like a sense of just like even
Speaker 4: this and calm because we all be kind of there's
Speaker 4: a lot of personalities on his house.
Speaker 3: Yeah twice. Yeah, that's right, my dad can can I
Speaker 3: know the ups and the downs of it? So I
Speaker 3: just y'all.
Speaker 1: I came in, I expressed the k upstairs. I said
Speaker 1: everything that I'm about to say to you about what
Speaker 1: I thought about Dad. The only person I could tell,
Speaker 1: honestly was Matt because I didn't know. I didn't want
Speaker 1: to say to anybody else that I didn't know how
Speaker 1: this is going to turn out. But since he had
Speaker 1: been through it, I felt like he could empathize and
Speaker 1: he would come in. We would sit down there and
Speaker 1: shoot out pool. You know what I'm saying. On the
Speaker 1: days when you weren't when you were filming and it
Speaker 1: was just me in the house, he would come by
Speaker 1: and be like, Yo, you're good, and I'd be like,
Speaker 1: some days is better than the others. But you know,
Speaker 1: having somebody there to kind of take your mind off
Speaker 1: of it helps a lot, you know, Like appreciate you
Speaker 1: for that.
Speaker 3: Bro, because anytime.
Speaker 2: Yeah, all right, so's.
Speaker 1: Take a quick break.
Speaker 2: Let's do that. We have a listener letter today. First
Speaker 2: one back we do. Yeah, let's get I think we do.
Speaker 4: All right, y'all stick around. We'll be right back after
Speaker 4: we pay these bills, because that's one thing that keeps going, honey,
Speaker 4: is a bill. Period. All right, and we're back. We're
Speaker 4: gonna dive into our listener letter of the day. Well
Speaker 4: we have two, but one. Let's see what this one says. Hey, Dvale, Kadeen,
Speaker 4: Triple Matt and Josh as well. Hope it's okay that
Speaker 4: I'm reaching out. You don't know me, of course, but
Speaker 4: I've listened to Ellis ever after dead ass for a
Speaker 4: few years, and lately I've realized that your family helped
Speaker 4: me through one of the most difficult seasons of my
Speaker 4: life without ever knowing it. When my mom was diagnosed
Speaker 4: with h mention, my father had a stroke that left
Speaker 4: him paralyzed on this left side. I made the decision
Speaker 4: to move both of my parents into my home. At
Speaker 4: the time, I was raising three kids, going through a divorce,
Speaker 4: and eventually left my job so I can care for them.
Speaker 4: It was one of the hardest and most exult losting
Speaker 4: seasons of my life. There were days I questioned whether
Speaker 4: I was even strong enough to carry it all. But
Speaker 4: listening to your podcast and watching the way your family
Speaker 4: loved and cared for Kadeen's parents gave me something I
Speaker 4: didn't even realize. I needed reassurance that I was reassuranced
Speaker 4: that what I was doing mattered. You normalize something that
Speaker 4: can feel incredibly lonely caring for the people who once
Speaker 4: cared for us. During that time, when the days were
Speaker 4: long and heavy, your family's honesty and love quietly reminded
Speaker 4: me to keep going.
Speaker 2: Wow, both of my parents have now passed away.
Speaker 4: My mom November of twenty twenty five and my father
Speaker 4: fabru oh Man Fabyar of twenty twenty six.
Speaker 2: That's so recent, back to back like that. Wow, I'm
Speaker 2: so sorry to hear that.
Speaker 1: That doesn't surprise me. Remember what I just said to you.
Speaker 1: If you ever go yeah, people sit it with the
Speaker 1: people who've been together. The notebook. You made me watch
Speaker 1: that movie and cry in two thousand and four, my
Speaker 1: big football ass in freaking fourteen twenty eight, No where
Speaker 1: were we?
Speaker 2: We were not so self?
Speaker 1: Yeah, not if I'm crying because they handed was together
Speaker 1: when they go ahead finished on.
Speaker 4: That and that I know. Lately, I've been doing a
Speaker 4: lot of reflecting. Grief has a way of making you
Speaker 4: look back and realize how how many people have helped
Speaker 4: hold you up along the way, even if they never
Speaker 4: knew it. Your family is one of those people. For me,
Speaker 4: losing them has been incredibly hard, But one thing that
Speaker 4: gives me comfort now is knowing I was able to
Speaker 4: walk that journey with them all the way to the end.
Speaker 4: Caring for them changed me in ways I'm still discovering.
Speaker 4: Looking back, I realized that the strength to keep showing
Speaker 4: up on the hardest days was often fueled by seeing
Speaker 4: families like yours doing the same thing with love and grace.
Speaker 1: Wow, that's what's up.
Speaker 2: That was really sweet.
Speaker 1: I appreciate that.
Speaker 2: My deepest sympathy to you.
Speaker 4: Like moving your parents and then losing them back to
Speaker 4: back by that is probably so incredibly difficult. But what
Speaker 4: happened that you got right and raising kids and quitting
Speaker 4: your job to have to take care of them. But
Speaker 4: what I will say is it something you may feel
Speaker 4: is at least you were there for those moments with them,
Speaker 4: you know, at the end, almost like trible, Like you said,
Speaker 4: like your dad being in your apartment, it's like, okay,
Speaker 4: him passing when your apartment, of course, is like something
Speaker 4: you would never want to happen. But the fact that
Speaker 4: you had that time with him, even though it was
Speaker 4: like a short weekend at the very end, you know,
Speaker 4: I still comfort knowing that my parents are close by
Speaker 4: and they're here with us.
Speaker 2: You know that we are able to take care of them.
Speaker 1: I would also say too, it would feel good for
Speaker 1: me to have my parents pass in my presence, or
Speaker 1: at least know that they're not passing alone alone. You
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, Like the fact that your parents
Speaker 1: stay here the fact that my parents still have each
Speaker 1: other if something were to happen, like Trible said the
Speaker 1: last episode, imagine your step mom goes home and finds
Speaker 1: your dad alone. You know, Trible was here to even
Speaker 1: console her stepmom and then be able to see the
Speaker 1: final moments of her dad. Having everyone around when something
Speaker 1: like this happens definitely matters, and that kind.
Speaker 4: Of struggle, like my brother, sister and I spoke about,
Speaker 4: like how much to divulge about Dad, you know, because
Speaker 4: people's health and their things they're going through can be
Speaker 4: a private matter for a lot of people that they
Speaker 4: don't want to speak about publicly.
Speaker 2: But we do feel like.
Speaker 4: We also have a testimony, like something that we can
Speaker 4: share to give people hope. You know, we did wait
Speaker 4: until Dad was finished with the treatment plan and all
Speaker 4: of that to kind of see, you know, what his
Speaker 4: prognosis would look like. But thank you for confirming to
Speaker 4: me the decision that we made to share about Dad's
Speaker 4: story because we hope that it's one of hope and
Speaker 4: resilience for other families, like you said explained here, So
Speaker 4: we appreciate that and sending lots of love to you.
Speaker 4: Thank you for your support and for listening all these
Speaker 4: years for real, that's dope.
Speaker 1: I do as want to point out that this is
Speaker 1: why we do share. Some of the information we gave
Speaker 1: could have helped save a life. Some of the information
Speaker 1: we got from other people that share that share did
Speaker 1: save lives. So this is the reason why humanity is
Speaker 1: important and why telling stories are important. Absolutely because you
Speaker 1: may save a life, or even if you don't save
Speaker 1: a life, letting someone else know that their life matters
Speaker 1: while living it and feeling like it, don't you know?
Speaker 1: In fact?
Speaker 2: All right, So we'll be going to a number two
Speaker 2: one more for the day.
Speaker 1: Take us out, baby, Dear de Valen Kadeen. I've been
Speaker 1: with my partner for nine years and we are newly engaged. Congratulations.
Speaker 1: Over the last two years of our relationship, while I
Speaker 1: was pregnant with our son, I found out he had
Speaker 1: been unfaithful and I'm still trying to make sense of
Speaker 1: everything that came with that. Six months before I became
Speaker 1: pregnant with our son, we lost our daughter when I
Speaker 1: was six months pregnant. It was traumatic. It was a
Speaker 1: traumatic delivery that landed me in the ICU. That loss
Speaker 1: broke me in ways I didn't even understand. At the time,
Speaker 1: I was dealing with postpartum depression without even knowing how
Speaker 1: to name it. In my Jamaican household, when you say
Speaker 1: you're depressed, you're told to pray or read your Bible.
Speaker 1: So I carried a lot of that pain in silence.
Speaker 1: I don't think either of us knew how to handle
Speaker 1: that kind of grief or how to be there for
Speaker 1: each other. Instead of healing together, we drifted apart in
Speaker 1: our own pain that typically happens. During that time, I
Speaker 1: got involved with someone he worked with. Oh my bad.
Speaker 1: During that time, he got involved with someone he worked with.
Speaker 1: He never told me. I found out on my own
Speaker 1: that intuition don't lie, and when I confronted him about it,
Speaker 1: he admitted it. The betrayal, on top of losing my
Speaker 1: daughter and everything I was already carrying, was overwhelming. To
Speaker 1: his credit, he has done everything he needed to do
Speaker 1: he needed to do to make things right, including no
Speaker 1: longer working with the other person involved. He has put
Speaker 1: in the work. Two years later, after counseling and therapy,
Speaker 1: he proposed and I said yes, because the truth is
Speaker 1: I love him, I want my family, but I'm also torn.
Speaker 1: I'm a libra. I'm big on loyalty, and sometimes even
Speaker 1: after all the work, I still feel so hurt and
Speaker 1: angry that I want to tear everything up all over again.
Speaker 1: I know I will never fully heal from the grief
Speaker 1: of losing my daughter, but I find that the grief
Speaker 1: of the portrayal lingers alongside it, and sometimes they feel
Speaker 1: tied together. Question is, how do you know if I'm
Speaker 1: holding onto something or fighting for or ignoring a truth.
Speaker 1: People always say that when someone cheats, they'll always cheat
Speaker 1: and give back the rank. Or do I stay and
Speaker 1: continue the work, the hard work of healing, even knowing
Speaker 1: I may never fully trust him again and that my
Speaker 1: grief may never fully go away. I would truly appreciate
Speaker 1: any guidance or perspective offerow see this to me? This
Speaker 1: to me is very layered. Number One, it starts with
Speaker 1: the grief right like it's whenever you have grief and
Speaker 1: the grief is tied to something, it's hard to get
Speaker 1: rid of that. I see that with a lot of people,
Speaker 1: even if sometimes it's not in fidelity. Sometimes a grief
Speaker 1: may be tied to an event or a job, and
Speaker 1: it's like I can't go back there because that reminds
Speaker 1: me of the grief that takes work. And there's no
Speaker 1: time limit or timetable on when you should be over
Speaker 1: that and what it should look like. What I think
Speaker 1: is one thing you did say was that he has
Speaker 1: been put in the work to make things right, which
Speaker 1: means you know, you have a person who cares enough
Speaker 1: to do things for you and make changes.
Speaker 4: And he made a poor choice, but he admitted it right,
Speaker 4: he didn't lie about.
Speaker 1: It, and he also made changes in his life till that.
Speaker 1: It's like, Yo, I'm gonn make sure you feel comfortable.
Speaker 1: I don't work with that person anymore. With all that
Speaker 1: being said, if you feel like you can't get over it,
Speaker 1: you have to do more work in order to try
Speaker 1: to live with that person. But you can't just carry
Speaker 1: that with them, because what happens is when you have
Speaker 1: that regret or you have that pain, you tend to
Speaker 1: bring it up over time, and now it becomes the
Speaker 1: other person is, well, how long are you going to
Speaker 1: hold this over my head?
Speaker 7: Right?
Speaker 1: So, realistically, I think you should have some conversations with yourself. Right,
Speaker 1: I know the Jamaicans, is they going to tell you
Speaker 1: to pray and read your Bible? But the only person
Speaker 1: that can give you the answer whether you should walk
Speaker 1: away is you in God. Yeah, so you need to
Speaker 1: talk to yourself and say, do I really feel comfortable
Speaker 1: in this situation to continue forward? And if you do,
Speaker 1: you work with it. But if you don't feel comfortable
Speaker 1: any like I can never get over this and it's
Speaker 1: haunting me, it might be okay to take a break
Speaker 1: or get some space, but only you know, Like, we
Speaker 1: can't give you that answer. You got to listen to yourself.
Speaker 4: I wonder if if you seek any kind of therapy again,
Speaker 4: like knowing how crew in house bolds are a lot
Speaker 4: of them don't believe in therapy, but it actually can
Speaker 4: be helpful to help you navigate your thoughts and see
Speaker 4: why it is that you're holding on, particularly to the
Speaker 4: grief associated with the infidelity, not necessarily with your daughter.
Speaker 4: Those are two separate entities I think need to be
Speaker 4: dealt with. Yeah, and it's hard, like losing a child.
Speaker 4: No one can ever like what do we say. There's
Speaker 4: no word for there's no word like for a parent
Speaker 4: who loses a child, Like if you lose a spouse,
Speaker 4: you're like a widow or widower lose a parent, but
Speaker 4: there's no real word for the loss.
Speaker 1: And that's why it's hard for me to even tell
Speaker 1: her how she's supposed to feel. I can't imagine trying
Speaker 1: to tell someone how to feel about something that I
Speaker 1: can't even imagine going through and telling them, Hey, that
Speaker 1: person worked hard enough, Let get over it. I can't
Speaker 1: even feel comfortable saying that, right, But I will say, like,
Speaker 1: if you've seen him take the strides to be better
Speaker 1: and do better, it's worth trying and trying.
Speaker 4: What people say, because she has said people always say,
Speaker 4: you know, once a cheat, are always a cheater, Like
Speaker 4: that doesn't that doesn't have to be his truth or
Speaker 4: your truth.
Speaker 2: That's you know, like you we.
Speaker 1: Don't project their own truth.
Speaker 2: And you know what we don't do is listen to
Speaker 2: what people say at all.
Speaker 1: You know and also know people will tell you to
Speaker 1: walk away from your love while holding on to their love.
Speaker 1: That does way more toxic chick than your love ever did.
Speaker 1: Don't nobody about facts? Fact?
Speaker 10: You know?
Speaker 4: So so yeah, I hope you guys are able to
Speaker 4: work through that. I don't think all is lost. It
Speaker 4: probably just requires a little bit more work and more time,
Speaker 4: you know, on both parts and.
Speaker 1: I'm interested to have. This is why we're sometimes a
Speaker 1: listener letters with two people, because I would want to
Speaker 1: hear what his perspective is on it, you know, like
Speaker 1: because for you to cheat and then admit immediately and
Speaker 1: it make changes, you can tell it that's something he
Speaker 1: didn't really want to do. And as much as we
Speaker 1: give people space to grief, cheating is never a value
Speaker 1: like a justification for you know, a grief is why cheated,
Speaker 1: right what I'm saying. But also you can't discount why
Speaker 1: someone grieves, you know, I would want to know, like
Speaker 1: why did it get to that? If y'all were both
Speaker 1: grieving together? Did y'all shut each other out? Did y'all
Speaker 1: shut each other down? Like? Why was cheating what you
Speaker 1: went to? And if I could understand why he went
Speaker 1: to that, maybe we could explain to them a.
Speaker 4: Lot more, because she did say they kind of like
Speaker 4: it forced them apart and they were both dealing with
Speaker 4: it separately. I even think about us, like we didn't
Speaker 4: deal with anything in this magnitude, just even dealing with.
Speaker 2: Stuff with dad, Oh no, will you know?
Speaker 4: Or me losing alcaon, my cousin passing from cancer, my
Speaker 4: other cousin passing from like I had so many deaths
Speaker 4: recently in my family that I was processing things in
Speaker 4: a certain way that you could have taken as me
Speaker 4: shutting you out.
Speaker 1: I felt distant, you know.
Speaker 4: We definitely felt distant, because it's like we're both battling
Speaker 4: our own sets of emotions, you know, in different ways
Speaker 4: and different capacities.
Speaker 1: And I could easily say it doesn't justify it, but
Speaker 1: I could see twenty five year old twenty eight year
Speaker 1: old Deval seeing you go through all of this grief
Speaker 1: and kind of shutting me out and being distant and
Speaker 1: getting upset and then feeling like who was there for me?
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. It was easier for me
Speaker 1: to deal now with forty two because I've lived life
Speaker 1: a little bit and I've matured. But the same person
Speaker 1: at twenty eight I probably would have moved differently. And
Speaker 1: I can open and honestly say that.
Speaker 2: Right for sure, both of us would have moved differently.
Speaker 2: I'm sure.
Speaker 4: Yeah, So hopefully you can touch base with us and
Speaker 4: let us know when you get to the other side
Speaker 4: of things how things have gotten better for you, because
Speaker 4: we're always gonna want the best for you.
Speaker 2: Guys, right facts, love that, all right, and.
Speaker 4: If you know what's best for you, it's about time
Speaker 4: to start writing back into the list letters.
Speaker 2: We want to hear from you, guys.
Speaker 4: We love to give our two cents and all things
Speaker 4: happening in your life, so be sure to email us
Speaker 4: at Vlisadvice at gmail dot com.
Speaker 1: That's right, that's th h E E L L I
Speaker 1: S A d V I C E at gmail dot com.
Speaker 4: All right, time for our moment of truth. We're talking
Speaker 4: fuck cancer and everything associated with it. Honey, fact man, I.
Speaker 1: Say fuck cancer from the beginning. This is my moment
Speaker 1: of truth. It ain't fuck cancer after someone gets cancer.
Speaker 1: It has to be fuck cancer before that. So let's
Speaker 1: do everything to prevent it. We not eat no more
Speaker 1: processed foods, no more drinks with too much sugar, no
Speaker 1: more staying inside on these phones, with these laptops and shit,
Speaker 1: fuck cancer. Fuck all of that. Let's really focus on
Speaker 1: getting back outside and doing the things that we were
Speaker 1: doing before cancer rates was so high. Let's get outside
Speaker 1: in the sun, let's move, let's communist people, Let's get
Speaker 1: off these devices and stop. Anything that happens in your
Speaker 1: life quickly is probably to your detriment. So if it's
Speaker 1: an easy thing to eat, an easy thing to fix,
Speaker 1: if you're still using the microwave and still using quick fixes,
Speaker 1: more than likely cancers gonna come with that.
Speaker 4: My favorite thing to do sidebar when you mentioned the
Speaker 4: microwave to heat food up now, is to get a pan,
Speaker 4: like a big pan. I put upside down, like a
Speaker 4: small like little like one of those chat like those
Speaker 4: shot glass or something with some water at the base
Speaker 4: of the pot, and then let it boil up and
Speaker 4: then you put the plate on top of the shot
Speaker 4: glass and you cover it. So it's like it steems
Speaker 4: your food. Food tastes so much better. So we are
Speaker 4: slowly like getting rid of the.
Speaker 2: Microwaveymore food anymore.
Speaker 4: No, We're like and even just like the amounts of leftovers,
Speaker 4: it's like we're not even doing that because food tends
Speaker 4: to lose this nutritional value anyway when you reheat it.
Speaker 2: So we're just trying to like cook what we need
Speaker 2: in this moment.
Speaker 4: Also, we're waiting for Dad to get better so you
Speaker 4: can just start eating the leftovers because we realize, like,
Speaker 4: why are all the leftovers still in the fridge.
Speaker 2: That's because Dad.
Speaker 4: Hasn't been eating it, so we're just like, why is
Speaker 4: there so much leftover lately?
Speaker 2: And I'm just like, okay, because Dad's not here to
Speaker 2: munch on it, go.
Speaker 1: Upstairs and get some perfect Also over eating, it's a
Speaker 1: thing in America, just eating, because I just eating, like
Speaker 1: over consumption.
Speaker 2: I told her about breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Where that
Speaker 2: came from.
Speaker 1: Drink more water, more coconut waters, Drink more teas, eat
Speaker 1: more berries, more grains.
Speaker 8: Don't if your sugar, be careful with coconut water, sugar.
Speaker 6: Yea, even the teas.
Speaker 9: I realized I saw that as micro plastics is releasing
Speaker 9: the tea guy.
Speaker 2: I stopped. You see, I brew the actual leaf, the.
Speaker 1: Leaf and the actually to make mullins.
Speaker 2: We drink.
Speaker 1: As long as you shave your bush good.
Speaker 2: That was later years ago. I don't have.
Speaker 1: All rose lead to the bush, right right, right, right,
Speaker 1: right right.
Speaker 2: That's your moment of truth, my moment, you know what.
Speaker 2: Shout out to the caretakers and the caregiving.
Speaker 4: Shout out to the people who sometimes feel like the
Speaker 4: unsung heroes in this whole thing.
Speaker 2: Shout out to my mom.
Speaker 4: For many thankless days and nights. You know tending to Dad,
Speaker 4: and you know, sometimes she would feel like damn, like
Speaker 4: you know, I sometimes I don't even get to thank
Speaker 4: you or please, and I'm like, girl, he's going through
Speaker 4: the motions. I know he means nothing by it. You
Speaker 4: can tell he was in a state of depression as
Speaker 4: well to at one point. You know, so shout out
Speaker 4: to the people who are taking care of those who
Speaker 4: need to be taken care of, and just make sure
Speaker 4: that you're getting someone to take care of you too,
Speaker 4: and take care of yourself.
Speaker 1: I forgot one thing that was very very important. Hydration.
Speaker 1: We made sure that when Dad got to the end
Speaker 1: of those weeks, we got him ivy bags.
Speaker 2: The end of those weeks, Yeah, my sister was giving
Speaker 2: him iv A.
Speaker 1: Lot of people suffered the feelings come from dehydration, the fatigue,
Speaker 1: the tiredness. Giving I feed back once a week during
Speaker 1: that process was really good. I don't want to forget
Speaker 1: that part, because that is very very important for keeping
Speaker 1: people healthy, especially elderly people or young people. Young people
Speaker 1: have fevers for a long time. If they look sluggish,
Speaker 1: get them my IVY back. It'll just help them. We
Speaker 1: did that with Cairo.
Speaker 4: Yeah, sure, yeah, that's I got to fit it out
Speaker 4: when I left town with the kids to make sure
Speaker 4: he needed that.
Speaker 1: He needed that.
Speaker 3: You don't if you're not here.
Speaker 1: Y'all seen the video. I accidentally don't eat, lost seven
Speaker 1: pounds in a day. Thought I was going dot. It's
Speaker 1: not funny though I thought I was going doct.
Speaker 2: Moment of truth, y'all, what you got.
Speaker 8: Everything happens for a reason. I remember when my mom
Speaker 8: years ago, my mom, she ended up getting fired from
Speaker 8: my job because of downsizing and stuff, and then a
Speaker 8: couple months later she was available to take my dad
Speaker 8: and care for him when he got sick. Then before
Speaker 8: she got sick, I worked for myself, but jobs started
Speaker 8: becoming less and less. It was like more so on
Speaker 8: the weekends only doing weddings stuff. But I was able
Speaker 8: to take care of her. So everything happens for a reason.
Speaker 8: Just keep that in mind.
Speaker 1: I like that things happens.
Speaker 9: I got a few moment of truth today that for us,
Speaker 9: he got the glass.
Speaker 4: I just realized you and met had the same hat,
Speaker 4: but different cities hired you do too, Okay.
Speaker 9: Shout out to the warriors who are dealing with it.
Speaker 6: It's not easy.
Speaker 9: I mean, I don't know personally, But I can't imagine
Speaker 9: it being easy for them dealing with their sicknesses and
Speaker 9: then being vocal about it and having to struggle with
Speaker 9: that and continuing life and being normal people. So shout
Speaker 9: out to to those people who are dealing with all
Speaker 9: sorts of cancers and struggles. A scripture that the Bible
Speaker 9: says is, uh, we overcome by the blood of the
Speaker 9: Lamb and by the word of our testimony, by the
Speaker 9: by our testimony. So keep talking about it, keep talking
Speaker 9: about and keep sharing about what you're dealing with, so
Speaker 9: that people can understand what people are dealing with with
Speaker 9: these with these diseases, getting checks and checkups. And also,
Speaker 9: like what you said, Develle, like there are a lot
Speaker 9: of things that we're consuming that are aiding and fueling
Speaker 9: the rise of cancer in general. So you know, just
Speaker 9: keep talking about That's my moment of truth. I didn't
Speaker 9: want to talk about the commune trible as well. I
Speaker 9: really think it's a really good idea to sort of
Speaker 9: like let's live off the land.
Speaker 1: I agree.
Speaker 9: I mean, I watched my wife and I watched this, uh,
Speaker 9: this documentary two nights ago called Poisoned on Netflix, and
Speaker 9: it was just talking about like E coli and some
Speaker 9: Manila and how to actually guess in our food. And
Speaker 9: it's crazy, like there's no reason why griefy Leans grief
Speaker 9: should have E Cola in it.
Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 9: It makes no sense. So I am all for living
Speaker 9: in a commune. I don't know if I'm going to
Speaker 9: have Timothy, did I get your power?
Speaker 1: So I know you got something. I'm just I know
Speaker 1: you got something.
Speaker 9: I had mad comments doing the podcast, but me and.
Speaker 3: Matt was over cracking up.
Speaker 1: Uh yeah, that's that's my moment of truth.
Speaker 10: Man.
Speaker 1: I love that. I know what he called you, Timothy get.
Speaker 10: Umber.
Speaker 1: That's why it's funny to me.
Speaker 6: Person to.
Speaker 1: The right of them.
Speaker 7: I do want to start a call in the commune.
Speaker 7: It's kind of my way in.
Speaker 3: That's why we were.
Speaker 5: It will be named that like your tell that's the
Speaker 5: name of your subdivision.
Speaker 6: Very inclusive.
Speaker 4: To have that though, you have to be with people
Speaker 4: you because now everybody come into my.
Speaker 9: Compound, male and females and dudes only get to come
Speaker 9: out when they got to pick stuff up.
Speaker 6: You gotta come use this hammer the highest period.
Speaker 2: What's the show ruthless?
Speaker 1: Ruthless and the highest roofs. You have a road. Yeah,
Speaker 1: none of you niggas is a lot. You bitches can come.
Speaker 5: Right yeah, oh.
Speaker 1: Bitches to the left, Turkey, we're going too far. It's
Speaker 1: going too far. It's going to.
Speaker 2: For the time to be what.
Speaker 6: Is my moment and truth? Uh, it's so.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 7: Cancer is something that's really can be really hard to
Speaker 7: deal with. My dad also had cancer, but he survived cancer,
Speaker 7: which I thought was crazy. I thought he was going
Speaker 7: to die. But he didn't even have to do radiation.
Speaker 7: So I was like, well, maybe he's never going to
Speaker 7: die because your dad had cancer to kind of cancer. Yeah,
Speaker 7: he had prostate cancer. Wow, he had to have surgery
Speaker 7: and he was fine after that. And then he also,
Speaker 7: like in the nineties, he got in a crash ahead
Speaker 7: on collision with a semi truck, didn't die. Then he
Speaker 7: came to Atlanta for one day. He couldn't survive Atlanta.
Speaker 1: Atlanta, you should have took him to Magic City night
Speaker 1: at the Hawks game.
Speaker 6: You know, people were saying they wasn't going to but
Speaker 6: they still did it.
Speaker 1: They still did Yeah, they still did it. Yeah, y'all performed, right, Yeah,
Speaker 1: yea perform I guess they didn't have the strippers.
Speaker 7: Though they have the name, they didn't have the name,
Speaker 7: like they just.
Speaker 6: Took the name off.
Speaker 1: Okay, they never there no.
Speaker 6: City collab the culture.
Speaker 7: Yeah, the Wings because Magic City has the best wings
Speaker 7: in the city apparently, So why didn't.
Speaker 1: Call it Magic City Wing Night or something?
Speaker 3: Wings? Yeah, he's waited for the Hawks. It made sense.
Speaker 1: No whoever came up with the marketing strategy for that
Speaker 1: dropped the ball.
Speaker 7: But I feel like this wasn't the first time they
Speaker 7: did it was it somebody was just hating and they
Speaker 7: yeah they.
Speaker 6: So I do.
Speaker 7: I do appreciate hearing, like how everybody's been using their
Speaker 7: own strengths to help Pops, because it's like, you don't know,
Speaker 7: you know, what can you do, but you can do something.
Speaker 2: He definitely asked because when he heard past.
Speaker 7: Yeah, Triby, I love Pops. I love seeing him. So
Speaker 7: I'm glad that he's on the oven up. Yeah, and
Speaker 7: hopefully everybody can continue to help.
Speaker 6: Him thrive through.
Speaker 2: Can't wait to take him back home, that's the next
Speaker 2: thing he's looking.
Speaker 4: Forward to, and drop them off from Save Vincent for
Speaker 4: a couple of weeks to get better.
Speaker 2: Can I come, of course, of course. All right, y'all,
Speaker 2: thank you so much for tuning in.
Speaker 4: Shout out to our Patreon gang who always rocks with
Speaker 4: us heavy. If you want to see exclusive content y'all
Speaker 4: and you're not part of Patreon, what are you doing? Like, seriously,
Speaker 4: what are you doing? Be sure to join us on Patreon.
Speaker 4: You can find me at Kadeen I am, and you.
Speaker 1: Can find the patreon at l sev Rafter and I.
Speaker 9: Am devou imt ellisphoto dot com, and I am Joshua
Speaker 9: Underscore Dwayne and.
Speaker 7: I'm at Trips the Cool t ri IBBZ, The's Cool
Speaker 7: on Everything.
Speaker 1: And if you're listening on Apple Podcasts, be sure to rate, review,
Speaker 1: and subscribe. The end of this episode got random, So
Speaker 1: that's why I went with the random, like d right,
Speaker 1: because it just seemed like I was supposed to do
Speaker 1: that at the time.
Speaker 2: Rand S, you look really good, like your face and
Speaker 2: your eyes. Everything is like, wow, you do too.
Speaker 1: There's a lot of things that look at over, but
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna describe the why.
Speaker 2: Thank you.
Speaker 4: See, we're doing it together, y'all, trying to age backwards period.
Speaker 2: That's the hashtag.
Speaker 7: Ass god Ellis ever After is an iHeartMedia podcast. It's
Speaker 7: hosted by Kadeen and Deval Ellis. It's produced by Triple Video.
Speaker 10: Production by Joshua Dwyane and Matthew Ellis, video editing by
Speaker 10: Lashan Roe. Talk Talk