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Speaker 1: Good morning. This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast.

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Speaker 1: Today's tip is about how to stop being late. Let

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Speaker 1: me start by saying that I find punctuality to be

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Speaker 1: a fascinating concept. It's more about expectations than about time itself.

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Speaker 1: There are definitely cultural elements to it. If you're lucky

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Speaker 1: enough to be invited to a party in Brazil, for instance,

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Speaker 1: showing up at the stated time is actually rude to

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Speaker 1: your hosts. They won't be expecting anyone until about sixty

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Speaker 1: minutes after the start. When I was visiting Japan, on

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Speaker 1: the other hand, my tour bus actually left someone who

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Speaker 1: wasn't on the bus at the time our guide said

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Speaker 1: we were going to leave. Punctuality is incredibly important there,

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Speaker 1: which is why the trains always run on time. Different

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Speaker 1: offices have different attitudes toward punctuality. It's one of the

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Speaker 1: first things people learn when starting a new job. In

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Speaker 1: some places, all meetings start ten minutes late, because it's

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Speaker 1: understood that you're coming from other meetings. In other places,

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Speaker 1: meetings in ten minutes early, so the next meetings can

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Speaker 1: start on time. Either system can work, at least until

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Speaker 1: these two places try to do business with each other.

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Speaker 1: In any case, while being late is about expectations, not time,

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Speaker 1: I know it's a common source of unhappiness. Indeed, when

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Speaker 1: people tell me that they have trouble with time management,

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Speaker 1: they often mean that they're always late. Defined here is

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Speaker 1: not meeting someone else's time expectations. Very few people enjoy

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Speaker 1: being late by this definition. Sure, there are probably some

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Speaker 1: people who view it as a power play. Look at me,

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Speaker 1: I can make other people wait because I am so important.

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Speaker 1: But I think that most normal, non psychopathic late people

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Speaker 1: really hate the idea that they are causing annoyance and inconvenience.

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Speaker 1: That sense of unease causes people to make terrible decisions.

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Speaker 1: They run red lights and speed through residential neighborhoods. One

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Speaker 1: well known study found that seminary students ask to prepare

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Speaker 1: a sermon on the good Samaritan who's in the Bible

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Speaker 1: because he stopped to help somebody. We're highly likely to

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Speaker 1: walk right past someone in need of medical assistance when

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Speaker 1: they were told that they were late to deliver their talks.

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Speaker 1: I appreciate the researcher's sense of humor, but this does

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Speaker 1: not speak well for human nature. Fortunately, there's a simple

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Speaker 1: way to avoid being late. The key is realizing that

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Speaker 1: most things that make us late are predictable. They fall

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Speaker 1: into that category that Donald Rumsfeld once called known unknowns.

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Speaker 1: You don't know how much traffic there will be on

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Speaker 1: Friday afternoon at five pm, but it probably won't be none.

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Speaker 1: You don't know which family member will forget something on

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Speaker 1: the way out the door, but the odds are good

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Speaker 1: that somebody will need to go back for something. You

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Speaker 1: don't know which of your direct reports will stop you

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Speaker 1: as you're leaving to catch your train, but no doubt

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Speaker 1: someone will need to talk with you. In each of

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Speaker 1: these cases, you don't know exactly what will fill your time,

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Speaker 1: but you can be pretty sure something will fill your time,

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Speaker 1: and if you don't plan for that, you'll be late.

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Speaker 1: The best way to plan for it is simply to

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Speaker 1: build in extra time. This seems obvious, but it's actually

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Speaker 1: life changing. When I talk to people who are always

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Speaker 1: on time, they almost universally leave ten to fifteen minutes

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Speaker 1: before they absolutely have to. They may not even recognize

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Speaker 1: that this is what they're doing, but when you talk

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Speaker 1: to them, they say things like, well, church is ten

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Speaker 1: minutes away, so we leave at nine forty for the

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Speaker 1: ten o'clock service. You can do the math and see

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Speaker 1: that this is twenty minutes, not ten. But the person

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Speaker 1: has built in time for someone to decide it's cold

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Speaker 1: and she needs a coat, and to find parking, and

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Speaker 1: to let a child decide that she wants to go

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Speaker 1: to Sunday school instead of going to the service, and

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Speaker 1: so they're in the pews when the minister stands up.

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Speaker 1: Whereas someone else might see that church is ten minutes

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Speaker 1: away and plan to get in the car at nine

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Speaker 1: to fifty, then they always show up in the middle

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Speaker 1: of that first hymn wondering what happened. Likewise, someone who

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Speaker 1: wants to catch the five thirty five pm train from

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Speaker 1: a station that's a fifteen minute walk from the office could,

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Speaker 1: in theory leave at five to eighteen pm, but it

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Speaker 1: might be better to start walking out at five oh five.

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Speaker 1: When your colleague stops you to announce that her team

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Speaker 1: actually isn't going to make that deadline on Friday. You

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Speaker 1: can deal with this without also having the hard choice

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Speaker 1: then of missing your train. Of course, this is easier

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Speaker 1: said than done. It's hard to stop doing what we're doing.

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Speaker 1: I think that what also happens is people worry they'll

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Speaker 1: be too early, and then they'll just be sitting there

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Speaker 1: wasting time. I have two responses to that. One is

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Speaker 1: that if you are early, just open up an ebook

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Speaker 1: on your phone and treat this as found me time.

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Speaker 1: But I've also noticed that people who are chronically late

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Speaker 1: tend to be so far off in their estimation skills

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Speaker 1: that what they think will make them early in fact

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Speaker 1: makes them on time. So think through your upcoming day.

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Speaker 1: Are you always late for something? Why? What would happen

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Speaker 1: if you set your departure time ten minutes earlier? It

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Speaker 1: can't happen. Maybe it can't happen for a good reason.

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Speaker 1: Maybe it's not a priority to you be on time.

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Speaker 1: But if it couldn't happen, well, I promise life feels

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Speaker 1: so much more relaxing. Well, you're not trying to cram

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Speaker 1: in one more thing in the meantime. This is Laura.

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Speaker 1: Thanks for listening, and here's to making the most of

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Speaker 1: our time. Hey, everybody, I'd love to hear from you.

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Speaker 1: You can send me your tips, your questions, or anything else.

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Speaker 1: Just connect with me on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram at

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Speaker 1: Before Breakfast Pod. That's b E the number four. Then

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Speaker 1: Breakfast pod. You can also shoot me an email at

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Speaker 1: Before Breakfast podcast at iHeartMedia dot com that Before Breakfast

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Speaker 1: is spelled out with all the letters. Thanks so much.

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Speaker 1: Should I look forward to staying in touch