1 00:00:00,080 --> 00:00:02,679 Speaker 1: There's a reason there's no one like me on earth 2 00:00:02,800 --> 00:00:05,440 Speaker 1: that does my kind of comedy. What it takes to 3 00:00:05,519 --> 00:00:08,880 Speaker 1: live that whole life and then to find the humor 4 00:00:08,920 --> 00:00:11,600 Speaker 1: out of it, and then to build something with it. 5 00:00:11,920 --> 00:00:14,640 Speaker 1: You building a comedy business to a stage where the 6 00:00:14,680 --> 00:00:18,919 Speaker 1: world even has any awareness that you exist is a 7 00:00:19,000 --> 00:00:22,120 Speaker 1: whole process that you have to learn how to create. 8 00:00:22,760 --> 00:00:24,760 Speaker 1: That is one of the bigger regrets of my life. 9 00:00:25,040 --> 00:00:27,960 Speaker 1: My only consolation is this that had I started sooner, 10 00:00:28,080 --> 00:00:30,200 Speaker 1: I would have been a voice like every other voice, 11 00:00:30,200 --> 00:00:33,479 Speaker 1: complaining about the same things, because I wouldn't have had 12 00:00:33,520 --> 00:00:37,600 Speaker 1: the perspective that I have today. 13 00:00:40,560 --> 00:00:42,600 Speaker 2: I can't believe I got to talk to today's guest. 14 00:00:42,680 --> 00:00:45,200 Speaker 2: To be honest, I don't think I've been this nervous 15 00:00:45,320 --> 00:00:48,680 Speaker 2: to interview a guest since Stacy Abrams, and that was 16 00:00:48,720 --> 00:00:50,880 Speaker 2: a couple of years ago, and I'll never forget leading 17 00:00:51,000 --> 00:00:54,880 Speaker 2: up to that interview, I had stress nightmares. But with Zarna, 18 00:00:55,160 --> 00:00:58,960 Speaker 2: this has been completely different. So Zarna has written this 19 00:00:59,120 --> 00:01:01,440 Speaker 2: incredible memoir and I'm not even gonna lie. I was 20 00:01:01,480 --> 00:01:05,440 Speaker 2: more of a fan of Zarna after I read this 21 00:01:05,560 --> 00:01:08,280 Speaker 2: memoir than I was before. I loved her comedy. I 22 00:01:08,319 --> 00:01:12,120 Speaker 2: think her comedy is very particular. It is smart, it 23 00:01:12,240 --> 00:01:16,040 Speaker 2: is witty, it's of course hilarious. As a mom myself, 24 00:01:16,200 --> 00:01:18,600 Speaker 2: I really appreciate a woman who is building a career 25 00:01:18,640 --> 00:01:20,600 Speaker 2: based on making fun of her kids, and I just 26 00:01:20,640 --> 00:01:22,840 Speaker 2: feel like that's my love language and the fact that 27 00:01:22,880 --> 00:01:26,160 Speaker 2: she's monetized it like that is the dream. But getting 28 00:01:26,200 --> 00:01:30,040 Speaker 2: to know her personal story, I mean, when you set 29 00:01:30,080 --> 00:01:32,760 Speaker 2: across from someone and you know their entire life story 30 00:01:32,800 --> 00:01:34,920 Speaker 2: because they have poured it out onto the page and 31 00:01:35,000 --> 00:01:37,760 Speaker 2: you get to see them and they're speaking to you 32 00:01:38,280 --> 00:01:40,880 Speaker 2: when so much was up against them from the moment 33 00:01:40,959 --> 00:01:45,840 Speaker 2: they were born. It is such a unique privilege, an 34 00:01:45,880 --> 00:01:50,240 Speaker 2: opportunity like Zarna exists the way that she exists, and 35 00:01:50,600 --> 00:01:55,520 Speaker 2: she put herself on this global stage in her forties, y'all, 36 00:01:55,560 --> 00:01:59,279 Speaker 2: her mid forties. Now she's in her fifth decade of life, 37 00:01:59,360 --> 00:02:03,480 Speaker 2: and her curve is soaring. She's developing a sitcom with 38 00:02:03,560 --> 00:02:06,840 Speaker 2: Mindy Kaling Kevin Hart. Like you know you're a big 39 00:02:06,840 --> 00:02:08,920 Speaker 2: deal when you got Mindy Kayling and Kevin Hart on 40 00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:11,720 Speaker 2: speed Dial. Okay, she has her own Amazon Prime special, 41 00:02:11,840 --> 00:02:14,239 Speaker 2: One in a Billion. She's got another one coming on 42 00:02:14,240 --> 00:02:19,160 Speaker 2: on Hulu. Zarnagarg Is that girl. All right, I embarrassed 43 00:02:19,160 --> 00:02:21,280 Speaker 2: the hell out of myself on the internet. After I 44 00:02:21,320 --> 00:02:24,480 Speaker 2: finished her memoir, I was listening to it, laughing my 45 00:02:24,560 --> 00:02:26,639 Speaker 2: ass off. When I was doing the dishes. My husband 46 00:02:26,720 --> 00:02:28,440 Speaker 2: would be like, what are you doing over there? What 47 00:02:28,480 --> 00:02:31,359 Speaker 2: are you listening to? And I'm like, I can't stop. 48 00:02:31,400 --> 00:02:33,120 Speaker 2: I didn't want to stop to explain to him what 49 00:02:33,160 --> 00:02:35,040 Speaker 2: I was listening to because it was that good and 50 00:02:35,080 --> 00:02:37,919 Speaker 2: I was so in the story with Zarna. So her 51 00:02:38,000 --> 00:02:41,519 Speaker 2: memoir tells her life story from growing up the daughter, 52 00:02:42,040 --> 00:02:46,480 Speaker 2: the oopsie, the oopsie daughter in her blended family in 53 00:02:46,600 --> 00:02:51,400 Speaker 2: Mumbai in India. She really was left to her own devices, 54 00:02:51,919 --> 00:02:56,160 Speaker 2: but in the meantime she flourished, like she turned into 55 00:02:56,200 --> 00:03:02,760 Speaker 2: the most extraordinary, resilient intelligence and hilarious, warm hearted, good 56 00:03:02,840 --> 00:03:07,720 Speaker 2: hearted human being. And you'll hear about her journey to America, 57 00:03:07,880 --> 00:03:10,520 Speaker 2: what brought her here, and how she's built her family here. 58 00:03:10,960 --> 00:03:13,120 Speaker 2: I'm just gonna stop talking now so you can listen 59 00:03:13,160 --> 00:03:15,760 Speaker 2: to Zarna and I and I just hope that you 60 00:03:15,919 --> 00:03:18,320 Speaker 2: check out her memoir. I hope that it touches you 61 00:03:18,360 --> 00:03:21,680 Speaker 2: the way that it touched me, and that you honestly 62 00:03:21,880 --> 00:03:25,320 Speaker 2: leave this conversation feeling inspired ba fam the way that 63 00:03:25,440 --> 00:03:29,880 Speaker 2: I was to not let age or life circumstance or 64 00:03:30,520 --> 00:03:34,400 Speaker 2: any vision of well I should have done this by now, 65 00:03:34,480 --> 00:03:36,480 Speaker 2: So it's too late for me. Throw that out the 66 00:03:36,520 --> 00:03:39,760 Speaker 2: damn window. Because Zarna gives each of us permission to 67 00:03:39,880 --> 00:03:43,600 Speaker 2: put ourselves out there and try something new, fail fast, 68 00:03:44,120 --> 00:03:48,320 Speaker 2: try hard, keep going, embrace the failure because one day 69 00:03:48,360 --> 00:03:52,000 Speaker 2: you will fly. And it's all down to Zarna and 70 00:03:52,080 --> 00:03:56,600 Speaker 2: the insight, the wisdom, the passion, the levity, the heart. 71 00:03:56,760 --> 00:03:59,520 Speaker 2: She brings to this conversation, to this book, to her work. 72 00:04:00,560 --> 00:04:04,160 Speaker 2: Enjoying my interview with Zarnagard, how do you feel New 73 00:04:04,240 --> 00:04:05,280 Speaker 2: York Times bestseller? 74 00:04:05,360 --> 00:04:08,200 Speaker 1: You know, I have a real resistance to calling myself 75 00:04:08,240 --> 00:04:11,080 Speaker 1: a writer or an author. I just am not able 76 00:04:11,120 --> 00:04:11,560 Speaker 1: to do it. 77 00:04:11,840 --> 00:04:12,320 Speaker 2: I heard. 78 00:04:12,600 --> 00:04:15,200 Speaker 1: I feel good that somebody's enjoying the book. 79 00:04:15,320 --> 00:04:17,960 Speaker 2: So what do you consider? I guess labels don't matter, but. 80 00:04:18,040 --> 00:04:20,400 Speaker 1: I don't know. In my head, I'm running a tech company. 81 00:04:22,240 --> 00:04:24,480 Speaker 1: In my head, I'm a software engineer. 82 00:04:26,520 --> 00:04:28,520 Speaker 2: You've talked about that. I mean that was like the 83 00:04:28,560 --> 00:04:31,640 Speaker 2: resistance your whole life. As we talk about your family 84 00:04:32,040 --> 00:04:34,680 Speaker 2: chastising you, calling you like, oh, who do you think 85 00:04:34,720 --> 00:04:37,880 Speaker 2: you are? An American woman and being even like hearing 86 00:04:37,880 --> 00:04:40,279 Speaker 2: from your English teacher that you were a great writer 87 00:04:40,640 --> 00:04:41,919 Speaker 2: and almost being ashamed of that. 88 00:04:42,320 --> 00:04:45,720 Speaker 1: Yeah, oh frightened. It was beyond shape. I was like, 89 00:04:45,920 --> 00:04:48,080 Speaker 1: if my parents find out, I'm gonna be in so 90 00:04:48,160 --> 00:04:48,760 Speaker 1: much trouble. 91 00:04:49,040 --> 00:04:50,599 Speaker 2: Do you know I went to Burns and Noble and 92 00:04:50,600 --> 00:04:51,320 Speaker 2: got this today. 93 00:04:51,760 --> 00:04:52,200 Speaker 1: Oh yeah. 94 00:04:52,800 --> 00:04:55,039 Speaker 2: I listened to the audiobook because I knew it was 95 00:04:55,080 --> 00:04:57,440 Speaker 2: gonna be good. I listened to the whole thing. And 96 00:04:57,600 --> 00:04:59,960 Speaker 2: that is how I caught myself crying in the day 97 00:05:00,120 --> 00:05:03,320 Speaker 2: care parking lot when I mean, I couldn't have like 98 00:05:03,560 --> 00:05:07,159 Speaker 2: planned it more perfectly or imperfectly. Is that I literally 99 00:05:07,200 --> 00:05:09,960 Speaker 2: was listening to the final chapter where you're thanking your 100 00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:12,839 Speaker 2: brother and the loop is being the circle is being completed. 101 00:05:13,360 --> 00:05:16,040 Speaker 2: You're bringing us back to that like sibling connection, and 102 00:05:16,120 --> 00:05:19,080 Speaker 2: I am just ugly crying, Oh. 103 00:05:18,920 --> 00:05:21,640 Speaker 1: My god, thank you. And that's the kind of comic 104 00:05:21,720 --> 00:05:22,040 Speaker 1: I am. 105 00:05:23,440 --> 00:05:26,440 Speaker 2: It's so but it's so it hurts so good. It's 106 00:05:26,480 --> 00:05:29,280 Speaker 2: the pay. It's like why you want. I mean, I girl, 107 00:05:29,320 --> 00:05:31,279 Speaker 2: you're a writer. I don't care what you say. That's 108 00:05:31,440 --> 00:05:35,119 Speaker 2: why I read books. I mean, that's why I love 109 00:05:35,279 --> 00:05:39,120 Speaker 2: stories so much. And I'm just so grateful, and I 110 00:05:39,160 --> 00:05:40,680 Speaker 2: was like, oh, I'll get a couple of copies. I'll 111 00:05:40,680 --> 00:05:41,960 Speaker 2: give it to a friend. But I don't think so, 112 00:05:42,040 --> 00:05:45,400 Speaker 2: because the book has pictures, the actual physical book. So 113 00:05:45,440 --> 00:05:48,200 Speaker 2: now I have this is like, you need the audio book, 114 00:05:48,480 --> 00:05:50,520 Speaker 2: you need the physical book. You need them both because 115 00:05:50,520 --> 00:05:51,880 Speaker 2: they each have a little something different. 116 00:05:52,160 --> 00:05:55,960 Speaker 1: We did. We tried to create two different and unique experiences, 117 00:05:55,960 --> 00:05:59,520 Speaker 1: so the book had photos all along and just trying 118 00:05:59,560 --> 00:06:01,880 Speaker 1: to give god text to the story. Actually it wasn't 119 00:06:01,880 --> 00:06:04,200 Speaker 1: about like, look at me, I'm famous, because I don't 120 00:06:04,240 --> 00:06:06,839 Speaker 1: even think I'm famous. But I felt like if I'm 121 00:06:06,839 --> 00:06:08,919 Speaker 1: telling the story and if I have some sort of 122 00:06:08,960 --> 00:06:11,160 Speaker 1: photo to give context to it, it would be more 123 00:06:11,200 --> 00:06:13,440 Speaker 1: fun for the for the reader. But then when we 124 00:06:13,480 --> 00:06:16,360 Speaker 1: did the audio, I realized that the book people got 125 00:06:16,440 --> 00:06:19,360 Speaker 1: something that the audio people won't. So we decided to 126 00:06:19,360 --> 00:06:22,480 Speaker 1: do the family essays and that extra because it didn't 127 00:06:22,480 --> 00:06:24,920 Speaker 1: feel right and I want it. I wanted each person 128 00:06:25,000 --> 00:06:28,080 Speaker 1: to have their full experience of the Zara story. 129 00:06:28,480 --> 00:06:30,359 Speaker 2: I did. I enjoyed. I had to wait for the 130 00:06:30,400 --> 00:06:32,560 Speaker 2: family essays. It's a bit of a letdown. No offense 131 00:06:32,600 --> 00:06:37,279 Speaker 2: to your beautiful husband, your son, Fridge. I just wanted 132 00:06:37,320 --> 00:06:39,280 Speaker 2: to sit in my zarna love and so I did 133 00:06:39,320 --> 00:06:41,359 Speaker 2: eventually get to them. I thought it was wonderful. So 134 00:06:41,600 --> 00:06:44,920 Speaker 2: there's no getting around it. You are brilliant in your 135 00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:48,360 Speaker 2: First of all, you are law school educated. You're educated 136 00:06:48,400 --> 00:06:51,240 Speaker 2: out the wazoo, because of course you are an immigrant, 137 00:06:51,320 --> 00:06:52,599 Speaker 2: Like that's just coming. 138 00:06:53,040 --> 00:06:55,640 Speaker 1: That's what you know. You don't know anything else. So 139 00:06:55,720 --> 00:06:56,640 Speaker 1: you're like, go to school. 140 00:06:57,680 --> 00:07:02,000 Speaker 2: You've been raised, you know, an entrepreneurial family and used 141 00:07:02,040 --> 00:07:04,360 Speaker 2: to read what was at the Indian Times, the. 142 00:07:04,360 --> 00:07:07,000 Speaker 1: Times of India, the Times of India. I still do 143 00:07:07,080 --> 00:07:08,440 Speaker 1: every single But how old were. 144 00:07:08,360 --> 00:07:10,120 Speaker 2: You when you started? You were like five or something. 145 00:07:10,280 --> 00:07:12,800 Speaker 1: I don't know. I feel like the moment I opened 146 00:07:12,800 --> 00:07:16,480 Speaker 1: my eyes, I started reading books and newspaper. I'm much 147 00:07:16,520 --> 00:07:19,040 Speaker 1: more a current events girl. I'm not as much a 148 00:07:19,160 --> 00:07:22,720 Speaker 1: literature girl. Like I haven't read every great literary class. 149 00:07:22,720 --> 00:07:26,480 Speaker 1: I've read many of them, but that's not my obsession. 150 00:07:26,560 --> 00:07:29,920 Speaker 1: My obsession is more every day of what's happening in 151 00:07:29,960 --> 00:07:32,920 Speaker 1: the world. Who said, what, where's the war happening? Why 152 00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:34,520 Speaker 1: is it happening? That type of stuff. 153 00:07:34,800 --> 00:07:37,800 Speaker 2: It's like your feet are so grounded in reality and 154 00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:40,240 Speaker 2: have been from such a young age. And I think, 155 00:07:40,360 --> 00:07:42,760 Speaker 2: I mean, I just I wish, I honestly like as 156 00:07:42,840 --> 00:07:44,680 Speaker 2: much as I am happy to know you now, I've 157 00:07:44,680 --> 00:07:46,600 Speaker 2: never wanted to meet a five year old kid more 158 00:07:46,680 --> 00:07:50,200 Speaker 2: than like five year old Zarni and I actually have 159 00:07:50,240 --> 00:07:51,680 Speaker 2: a five year old. And I think part of the 160 00:07:51,720 --> 00:07:54,760 Speaker 2: reason why I was so emotionally just impacted by your 161 00:07:54,800 --> 00:07:58,800 Speaker 2: work is because I am in so many ways like 162 00:07:59,080 --> 00:08:02,400 Speaker 2: living a similar I mean, that's obviously so different in 163 00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:04,720 Speaker 2: a lot of ways, but raising young kids, but I 164 00:08:05,040 --> 00:08:09,160 Speaker 2: completely I resonate with, like the financial challenges of raising children, 165 00:08:09,200 --> 00:08:10,960 Speaker 2: and I'm not even trying to put my kids in 166 00:08:11,040 --> 00:08:11,760 Speaker 2: private school. 167 00:08:11,920 --> 00:08:14,760 Speaker 1: Don't do it a forty k year spoiler alert for 168 00:08:14,800 --> 00:08:17,480 Speaker 1: those who want to read the book. That whole chapter 169 00:08:17,680 --> 00:08:21,680 Speaker 1: I wrote for my fellow Tristate area moms because shed 170 00:08:21,840 --> 00:08:24,280 Speaker 1: moms to know the truth of what I went through, 171 00:08:24,320 --> 00:08:27,440 Speaker 1: what I felt, and how you actually didn't. I didn't 172 00:08:27,480 --> 00:08:29,640 Speaker 1: need to put myself through any of them. I just 173 00:08:29,680 --> 00:08:32,319 Speaker 1: did it to myself, yeah, you know, and I really 174 00:08:32,360 --> 00:08:35,200 Speaker 1: wrote it because that is something I deal with every day. 175 00:08:35,400 --> 00:08:37,640 Speaker 1: Every day. I have a mom talk to me about 176 00:08:37,679 --> 00:08:40,840 Speaker 1: how she's dying under the burden of this price tag, 177 00:08:40,960 --> 00:08:43,680 Speaker 1: and it's insane and every day I'm trying to help 178 00:08:43,720 --> 00:08:48,520 Speaker 1: somebody like navigate what's the better option around wherever she lives. 179 00:08:48,559 --> 00:08:51,320 Speaker 2: Well, listen, like you said, four, I know, since so 180 00:08:51,440 --> 00:08:54,160 Speaker 2: you put your kids through this, you know, private school 181 00:08:54,160 --> 00:08:56,240 Speaker 2: on the Upper East Side? Was it in Manhattan? You 182 00:08:56,280 --> 00:08:58,040 Speaker 2: have three children? But not all three of them went? 183 00:08:58,080 --> 00:08:59,319 Speaker 2: It was your first two, right? 184 00:08:59,440 --> 00:09:00,360 Speaker 1: All three? 185 00:09:00,640 --> 00:09:01,440 Speaker 2: Oh, all three went? 186 00:09:01,600 --> 00:09:04,240 Speaker 1: Okay? And I have to take all three out. 187 00:09:04,440 --> 00:09:08,240 Speaker 2: Damn it. And and I I love the scrappiness of 188 00:09:08,280 --> 00:09:11,040 Speaker 2: that story of you getting your kids into the New 189 00:09:11,120 --> 00:09:15,160 Speaker 2: York public school system because I know how challenging it is. 190 00:09:15,559 --> 00:09:18,240 Speaker 2: And I too was so confused because I'm from Georgia, 191 00:09:18,360 --> 00:09:20,520 Speaker 2: which which is similar to I mean, it's like every 192 00:09:20,559 --> 00:09:23,920 Speaker 2: other state, like where do you live? This is your school? Congratulations, 193 00:09:24,120 --> 00:09:26,520 Speaker 2: not New York, not in New York. And so once 194 00:09:26,520 --> 00:09:30,040 Speaker 2: you're in that system, how like how toxic it is 195 00:09:30,080 --> 00:09:31,840 Speaker 2: and how they just they know they have you by 196 00:09:31,880 --> 00:09:34,520 Speaker 2: the you know what's and that like mister potato head, 197 00:09:34,559 --> 00:09:36,559 Speaker 2: which is what you've you know, for legal reasons, I'm 198 00:09:36,559 --> 00:09:39,920 Speaker 2: sure call the what the director of admissions or whatever 199 00:09:40,120 --> 00:09:43,120 Speaker 2: thinks he's the king of everything of this this private school. 200 00:09:43,120 --> 00:09:46,120 Speaker 2: But forty k a year for kindergarten. I know it's 201 00:09:46,120 --> 00:09:46,920 Speaker 2: like double. 202 00:09:46,640 --> 00:09:50,160 Speaker 1: That now seventy yeah, Jesus, so I pay. 203 00:09:50,400 --> 00:09:52,600 Speaker 2: I don't even want to think. But daycare, you have 204 00:09:52,640 --> 00:09:54,600 Speaker 2: to understand. So did you ever pay for your kids. 205 00:09:54,640 --> 00:09:59,760 Speaker 1: Daycare were little? So that's too expensive, that's true. But 206 00:10:00,120 --> 00:10:03,040 Speaker 1: at least there's no other alternative to daycare. There's just 207 00:10:03,080 --> 00:10:05,439 Speaker 1: not there's no place to put a six month old 208 00:10:05,559 --> 00:10:07,760 Speaker 1: or ten month old. And I get it, and there 209 00:10:07,880 --> 00:10:10,240 Speaker 1: actually I know what they're doing, like there's a human 210 00:10:10,280 --> 00:10:12,760 Speaker 1: being taking care of two, three, four five babies at 211 00:10:12,800 --> 00:10:15,160 Speaker 1: a time. The private school thing, I just don't get, 212 00:10:15,280 --> 00:10:18,839 Speaker 1: Like algebra has not changed in one hundred years. Why 213 00:10:18,920 --> 00:10:22,280 Speaker 1: it has become so prohibitive. It's become a status symbol. 214 00:10:22,320 --> 00:10:25,000 Speaker 1: It's like buying a Gucci bag, Dacre. I've paid two 215 00:10:25,080 --> 00:10:28,840 Speaker 1: and it's very, very very expensive for sure, and luckily 216 00:10:28,880 --> 00:10:31,640 Speaker 1: it's a limited time and then you transition to school 217 00:10:31,720 --> 00:10:33,760 Speaker 1: and then that's where it needs to be. You don't 218 00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:36,360 Speaker 1: write that kind of check for anything else. You do 219 00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:37,160 Speaker 1: it for your kids. 220 00:10:37,240 --> 00:10:40,559 Speaker 2: You can't fathom you breaking out into the comedy scene. 221 00:10:40,800 --> 00:10:44,400 Speaker 2: You were forty something, forty forty four, forty four and 222 00:10:45,080 --> 00:10:46,960 Speaker 2: you doing it not just I mean, I know you 223 00:10:47,040 --> 00:10:49,600 Speaker 2: started a little bit before the pandemic, and then your 224 00:10:49,679 --> 00:10:52,360 Speaker 2: husband lost his job, and then it became less about 225 00:10:52,480 --> 00:10:54,600 Speaker 2: you exploring this new path and being like, oh, I 226 00:10:54,640 --> 00:10:56,880 Speaker 2: now I'm going to save the family with this career. 227 00:10:57,160 --> 00:10:59,440 Speaker 2: You felt called to do it, but the level of 228 00:10:59,640 --> 00:11:02,920 Speaker 2: courage to break out and try something different at that 229 00:11:03,000 --> 00:11:05,720 Speaker 2: stage in life when you talk about feeling as if 230 00:11:05,800 --> 00:11:07,240 Speaker 2: you were a stay at home mom for all those 231 00:11:07,320 --> 00:11:10,120 Speaker 2: year sixteen something years that you talk about, feeling like 232 00:11:10,160 --> 00:11:12,000 Speaker 2: the rest of the world had moved on, and how 233 00:11:12,040 --> 00:11:15,040 Speaker 2: you were kind of left behind, I mean, it resonated 234 00:11:15,160 --> 00:11:17,720 Speaker 2: so much. Do you still look back at those years 235 00:11:17,800 --> 00:11:19,560 Speaker 2: when you were a stay at home mom with all 236 00:11:19,640 --> 00:11:23,000 Speaker 2: this talent and all this untapped intelligence in your mind? 237 00:11:23,080 --> 00:11:25,960 Speaker 2: You look back and wonder what if I had started sooner? 238 00:11:26,280 --> 00:11:27,920 Speaker 2: Or are you all peace. 239 00:11:27,880 --> 00:11:30,960 Speaker 1: All the time? I have so many regrets, even though 240 00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:33,560 Speaker 1: you shouldn't have regrets and you shouldn't look back. And 241 00:11:33,640 --> 00:11:35,840 Speaker 1: everybody says that, and I say it to other people. 242 00:11:36,280 --> 00:11:39,480 Speaker 1: No one wins against age, so it's like a thing. 243 00:11:39,760 --> 00:11:42,680 Speaker 1: My only consolation is that I really wouldn't have the 244 00:11:42,760 --> 00:11:45,240 Speaker 1: stories that I have today. There's a reason there's no 245 00:11:45,320 --> 00:11:48,240 Speaker 1: one like me on earth that does my kind of comedy. 246 00:11:48,360 --> 00:11:51,440 Speaker 1: It's not just here, it's no one in India, there's 247 00:11:51,440 --> 00:11:54,640 Speaker 1: no one in all of Asia. Because what it takes 248 00:11:54,760 --> 00:11:57,920 Speaker 1: to live that whole life and then to find the 249 00:11:58,000 --> 00:12:00,960 Speaker 1: humor out of it and then to build something with it, 250 00:12:01,000 --> 00:12:05,120 Speaker 1: those are all individual, huge, humongous steps that you have 251 00:12:05,200 --> 00:12:08,440 Speaker 1: to take. If building a comedy business to a stage 252 00:12:08,480 --> 00:12:11,559 Speaker 1: where the world even has any awareness that you exist 253 00:12:12,000 --> 00:12:14,440 Speaker 1: is a whole process that you have to learn how 254 00:12:14,480 --> 00:12:17,800 Speaker 1: to create. So I have a lot of regrets, but 255 00:12:17,880 --> 00:12:20,800 Speaker 1: I really do work on not dwelling on them. It's 256 00:12:20,800 --> 00:12:22,920 Speaker 1: a constant battle though. That is one of the bigger 257 00:12:22,960 --> 00:12:25,400 Speaker 1: regrets of my life. My only consolation is this that 258 00:12:25,559 --> 00:12:28,040 Speaker 1: had I started sooner, I would have been a voice 259 00:12:28,120 --> 00:12:31,480 Speaker 1: like every other voice, complaining about the same things, because 260 00:12:31,520 --> 00:12:34,120 Speaker 1: I wouldn't have had the perspective that I have today 261 00:12:34,240 --> 00:12:37,040 Speaker 1: as the mother of these grown kids, having gone through 262 00:12:37,080 --> 00:12:39,800 Speaker 1: this whole cycle, and that that was the gift that 263 00:12:39,880 --> 00:12:43,440 Speaker 1: Destiny decided to give me, and I have to accept 264 00:12:43,480 --> 00:12:46,480 Speaker 1: it in grace and not be a brat about it. 265 00:12:46,559 --> 00:12:48,760 Speaker 2: Okay, ba fam, I don't want to, but we got 266 00:12:48,760 --> 00:12:50,280 Speaker 2: to take a break. We got to pay some bills. 267 00:12:50,400 --> 00:12:52,960 Speaker 2: Zarna would not be happy with me if she knew 268 00:12:53,160 --> 00:12:55,319 Speaker 2: that I wasn't going to monetize this episode, because she 269 00:12:55,440 --> 00:12:57,920 Speaker 2: is all about that money. Honey. I'll be right back 270 00:12:57,960 --> 00:13:00,920 Speaker 2: with more of my chat with the ZARNI you're making 271 00:13:00,960 --> 00:13:03,960 Speaker 2: me like want to own my momminess. I struggle with 272 00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:07,160 Speaker 2: this a little bit, so I and also so many 273 00:13:07,160 --> 00:13:09,600 Speaker 2: things I want to say, But I want to first 274 00:13:09,600 --> 00:13:10,839 Speaker 2: of all, I want to let you know that from 275 00:13:10,880 --> 00:13:13,880 Speaker 2: the other side, looking at your journey, I'm like, maybe 276 00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:15,520 Speaker 2: that's the way to do it. I should have married 277 00:13:15,520 --> 00:13:18,120 Speaker 2: a rich wall streeter. I should have like had the 278 00:13:18,200 --> 00:13:20,559 Speaker 2: kids and been the stay at home mom because I'm 279 00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:22,600 Speaker 2: a dummy. I feel like a dummy. I'm like trying 280 00:13:22,600 --> 00:13:25,160 Speaker 2: to do it all at the same times. Arna, I 281 00:13:25,200 --> 00:13:25,720 Speaker 2: am God. 282 00:13:25,920 --> 00:13:27,040 Speaker 1: Yeah, let's get into it. 283 00:13:28,360 --> 00:13:30,560 Speaker 2: Oh my god, my husband's texted me, now what time? 284 00:13:30,600 --> 00:13:33,240 Speaker 2: I don't listen. My husband literally just texted me, what 285 00:13:33,320 --> 00:13:35,040 Speaker 2: time are you gonna pick the kids up? Don't know, 286 00:13:35,120 --> 00:13:37,920 Speaker 2: don't care. I'm talking to Arna. I don't know. But 287 00:13:38,040 --> 00:13:41,480 Speaker 2: it's so hard, it's so bad, and I don't have 288 00:13:41,520 --> 00:13:43,600 Speaker 2: a village. My mommy doesn't live here, you know. 289 00:13:44,040 --> 00:13:47,040 Speaker 1: Thank God, I have one village who came up with that. 290 00:13:47,200 --> 00:13:49,920 Speaker 1: I was always looking, I was where is the village? 291 00:13:50,600 --> 00:13:54,280 Speaker 2: Well, everywhere but America. That's like you know, you've you've 292 00:13:54,280 --> 00:13:56,320 Speaker 2: talked about wanting to have I listened to your Your 293 00:13:56,360 --> 00:13:59,160 Speaker 2: Family podcast, which is so cute. What a great memory 294 00:13:59,200 --> 00:14:02,160 Speaker 2: for your kids. Eventually, one day they'll probably well hopefully. 295 00:14:01,720 --> 00:14:04,000 Speaker 1: They not don't get canceled out of the job market, but. 296 00:14:04,040 --> 00:14:09,240 Speaker 2: Okay, well they'll probably be business entrepreneurs anymore. Uh. But 297 00:14:09,480 --> 00:14:13,760 Speaker 2: like you talk about wanting to wage war on American motherhood, Yeah, 298 00:14:13,840 --> 00:14:15,680 Speaker 2: can we wage that work? Do you need recruits? 299 00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:19,080 Speaker 1: Yeah? I mean, don't you think it's it's insane that 300 00:14:19,120 --> 00:14:24,040 Speaker 1: this way to fulfill all the obligations to everybody's satisfaction. 301 00:14:24,600 --> 00:14:28,800 Speaker 1: I'm constantly even today letting some teachers down in my kids' 302 00:14:28,800 --> 00:14:31,040 Speaker 1: school because I didn't show up for this that or 303 00:14:31,040 --> 00:14:34,160 Speaker 1: the other thing, or you know, forgetting something work wise 304 00:14:34,240 --> 00:14:36,840 Speaker 1: because something at my kids school took over and like 305 00:14:36,880 --> 00:14:39,640 Speaker 1: completely consume me. There's no way. And I have so 306 00:14:39,760 --> 00:14:42,440 Speaker 1: much empathy for where you are, Mandy. I've been there, 307 00:14:42,480 --> 00:14:45,200 Speaker 1: and it's it just feels like it's it's going to 308 00:14:45,320 --> 00:14:47,960 Speaker 1: drown you. It feels like it's gonna drown you. And 309 00:14:48,040 --> 00:14:51,320 Speaker 1: the one big gift of my career right now that 310 00:14:51,400 --> 00:14:54,360 Speaker 1: has been unexpected because I didn't see it until somebody 311 00:14:54,360 --> 00:14:56,680 Speaker 1: mentioned it to me, is that a lot of young 312 00:14:56,760 --> 00:15:00,000 Speaker 1: moms like yourself with young kids are actually taking up 313 00:15:00,320 --> 00:15:02,400 Speaker 1: and saying, you know what, maybe we should take a 314 00:15:02,440 --> 00:15:05,720 Speaker 1: break or go slow these years because I can come 315 00:15:05,760 --> 00:15:08,600 Speaker 1: back and have a real career. And this is something 316 00:15:08,720 --> 00:15:12,560 Speaker 1: they are learning from me that it is possible. It's 317 00:15:12,600 --> 00:15:15,360 Speaker 1: not easy. Nothing in life is easy, but it is 318 00:15:15,480 --> 00:15:17,720 Speaker 1: possible to be that mom when you need to be 319 00:15:17,800 --> 00:15:20,080 Speaker 1: that mom if you can afford to be that mom, 320 00:15:20,280 --> 00:15:22,360 Speaker 1: or whatever version of it you can afford to be. 321 00:15:22,760 --> 00:15:25,400 Speaker 1: And then say that once these kids are out of 322 00:15:25,560 --> 00:15:30,160 Speaker 1: this certain stage, I'm gonna go all in because it's very, 323 00:15:30,280 --> 00:15:32,440 Speaker 1: very hard. But it's a hard thing. It was very 324 00:15:32,480 --> 00:15:35,560 Speaker 1: hard for me, it still is. I travel. The only 325 00:15:35,600 --> 00:15:37,680 Speaker 1: way to make a living really as a comic is 326 00:15:37,720 --> 00:15:39,960 Speaker 1: to be on the road. So it's a concept. I 327 00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:43,680 Speaker 1: still have a thirteen year old son at home, which everywhere, 328 00:15:43,800 --> 00:15:46,080 Speaker 1: no matter what time zone I'm in, I'm like, did 329 00:15:46,080 --> 00:15:48,560 Speaker 1: you eat? Did you feel this paper? Your teacher when 330 00:15:48,600 --> 00:15:50,560 Speaker 1: they called they don't know where I am I'll get 331 00:15:50,560 --> 00:15:52,960 Speaker 1: a call at two am in Hawaii because I'm there 332 00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:55,920 Speaker 1: for a work I'm not there to hang out, and 333 00:15:56,040 --> 00:15:57,880 Speaker 1: my phone will ring. And you know when your kids 334 00:15:57,960 --> 00:15:59,680 Speaker 1: school calls, you just jump up. 335 00:16:00,120 --> 00:16:03,200 Speaker 2: Yes, it's stressful, and you don't know what time it is. 336 00:16:03,240 --> 00:16:05,160 Speaker 2: You're trying to think backwards, like wait, is this is 337 00:16:05,200 --> 00:16:06,160 Speaker 2: he in school? Is this thing? 338 00:16:06,640 --> 00:16:09,600 Speaker 1: Like immediately i'mause, okay, okay, are you okay? Did everything 339 00:16:09,840 --> 00:16:13,360 Speaker 1: you know? And it's like that's all our lives. So 340 00:16:13,440 --> 00:16:16,400 Speaker 1: you the thing you have to do is give yourself grace. 341 00:16:16,440 --> 00:16:19,480 Speaker 1: And also, no one else will if you don't give 342 00:16:19,520 --> 00:16:22,560 Speaker 1: yourself grace and take care of yourself. However that self 343 00:16:22,560 --> 00:16:25,840 Speaker 1: care is no one will do it for you. No 344 00:16:25,880 --> 00:16:27,840 Speaker 1: one in this country is going to ask the mother, 345 00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:31,160 Speaker 1: what do you need? That is gone. Even the politicians say, 346 00:16:31,160 --> 00:16:33,800 Speaker 1: oh lie, you know that, Oh we're gonna do this 347 00:16:33,840 --> 00:16:35,240 Speaker 1: for the moms. They're doing nothing. 348 00:16:35,680 --> 00:16:37,000 Speaker 2: You and I are in the same page when I 349 00:16:37,040 --> 00:16:38,720 Speaker 2: heard you say, no one gets a shot moms, No 350 00:16:38,720 --> 00:16:40,800 Speaker 2: one gets a shop moms or kids in this country, 351 00:16:41,080 --> 00:16:41,880 Speaker 2: like full stop. 352 00:16:43,040 --> 00:16:45,880 Speaker 1: Unfortunately women neither. So it's like a triple web. 353 00:16:47,720 --> 00:16:50,480 Speaker 2: And you're and you know, you're like it's the biggest 354 00:16:50,640 --> 00:16:53,000 Speaker 2: let down. But it's also there's this part in the book. 355 00:16:53,040 --> 00:16:54,920 Speaker 2: You have all these great quotes. I love that you 356 00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:57,640 Speaker 2: quote yourself too. You're like, yes, this is my wisdom. 357 00:16:57,720 --> 00:17:01,000 Speaker 2: It's pain. You say, pain is my destiny and my 358 00:17:01,080 --> 00:17:04,440 Speaker 2: company and my affinity. Embracing pain and not wasting time 359 00:17:04,520 --> 00:17:07,240 Speaker 2: wondering why me will put you on the fast track 360 00:17:07,560 --> 00:17:11,560 Speaker 2: to success. And I think, as a mom, I've stopped 361 00:17:11,960 --> 00:17:16,040 Speaker 2: expecting anyone else to make it easier, and. 362 00:17:16,480 --> 00:17:18,280 Speaker 1: You may as well, because it's not going to happen. 363 00:17:18,480 --> 00:17:20,280 Speaker 1: In my experience, it's not going to happen. 364 00:17:20,920 --> 00:17:23,520 Speaker 2: Now, Well, talk to me about you're raising your kids 365 00:17:23,560 --> 00:17:27,400 Speaker 2: on the Upper East Side of Manhattan and you are 366 00:17:27,440 --> 00:17:29,480 Speaker 2: putting them in these fancy schools and all of that. 367 00:17:29,600 --> 00:17:31,440 Speaker 2: How did you connect with the other moms? Like were 368 00:17:31,520 --> 00:17:33,800 Speaker 2: there other moms like you so. 369 00:17:34,040 --> 00:17:36,879 Speaker 1: In the fancy, expensive schools. I knew I was a 370 00:17:36,920 --> 00:17:39,800 Speaker 1: misfit on day one, Like I just knew that this, 371 00:17:40,040 --> 00:17:43,480 Speaker 1: Like I really thought, Oh, for my kid's future, this 372 00:17:43,600 --> 00:17:45,359 Speaker 1: is what I have to do. I don't relate to 373 00:17:45,400 --> 00:17:49,120 Speaker 1: any of these people, but this is where good education is. 374 00:17:50,160 --> 00:17:52,800 Speaker 1: So we're going to do this. And as time wre on, 375 00:17:53,560 --> 00:17:56,560 Speaker 1: what I learned is that what they consider education and 376 00:17:56,600 --> 00:17:59,760 Speaker 1: what I consider education but just two different things. To me, 377 00:17:59,840 --> 00:18:03,360 Speaker 1: that felt like a country club and everything was the 378 00:18:03,400 --> 00:18:06,600 Speaker 1: axis was revolving around, like we need to have these 379 00:18:06,640 --> 00:18:10,159 Speaker 1: many days off, extra days off because we need to 380 00:18:10,160 --> 00:18:13,159 Speaker 1: be able to travel to all these exotic locations, Like 381 00:18:13,200 --> 00:18:15,520 Speaker 1: that would never factor in the life that I live. 382 00:18:15,840 --> 00:18:18,520 Speaker 1: The life that I live, I work every single day, 383 00:18:18,560 --> 00:18:22,840 Speaker 1: even now every holiday, every every day I'm working. It 384 00:18:22,880 --> 00:18:25,160 Speaker 1: never occurs to me that I should take extra time 385 00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:27,320 Speaker 1: off to fly to the other side of earth. Like 386 00:18:27,320 --> 00:18:29,520 Speaker 1: if I really really want to take a vacation, I 387 00:18:29,600 --> 00:18:32,320 Speaker 1: fly to Florida three hours. Like my math is already 388 00:18:32,359 --> 00:18:34,800 Speaker 1: doing all the calculation and how much time this is 389 00:18:34,800 --> 00:18:39,160 Speaker 1: gonna take. So what I learned very early is that 390 00:18:39,400 --> 00:18:43,520 Speaker 1: this type of schooling is not only not giving the 391 00:18:43,640 --> 00:18:47,680 Speaker 1: education that I value, which is very basic, hardcore math, 392 00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:51,320 Speaker 1: science reading, Like I don't need the fluff. I don't 393 00:18:51,359 --> 00:18:54,800 Speaker 1: want the class in Japanese that two kids are gonna 394 00:18:54,840 --> 00:18:57,320 Speaker 1: take and the school is very proud to offer. I 395 00:18:57,400 --> 00:19:00,800 Speaker 1: just want you to teach my kids the basics. And 396 00:19:01,520 --> 00:19:04,800 Speaker 1: so what I found is that they don't actually care 397 00:19:04,840 --> 00:19:07,600 Speaker 1: about the basics. They spend a lot of money on 398 00:19:07,640 --> 00:19:11,160 Speaker 1: all these exotic things and additions that I don't care about. 399 00:19:11,440 --> 00:19:14,320 Speaker 1: And mostly I felt like the one thing that made 400 00:19:14,359 --> 00:19:17,520 Speaker 1: New York New York I was losing in private school, 401 00:19:18,040 --> 00:19:22,000 Speaker 1: I was losing the entire grittiness of it. The whole 402 00:19:22,040 --> 00:19:25,600 Speaker 1: school is constantly working to remove every weed off the 403 00:19:25,720 --> 00:19:28,959 Speaker 1: road for the kids, and to me, the education is 404 00:19:29,040 --> 00:19:32,679 Speaker 1: in the weeds. The education is in the everyday, daily 405 00:19:32,680 --> 00:19:36,120 Speaker 1: frustrations of how do you do thick For example, the 406 00:19:36,359 --> 00:19:39,359 Speaker 1: experience that you just shared right now, where you don't 407 00:19:39,400 --> 00:19:41,360 Speaker 1: have a village, you're running to your mother in law 408 00:19:41,400 --> 00:19:44,320 Speaker 1: dropping a kid. Then the school is closed. As painful 409 00:19:44,359 --> 00:19:46,400 Speaker 1: as it is in the moment, and I know it's 410 00:19:46,480 --> 00:19:49,680 Speaker 1: very painful, I've lived it. Believe me, when you come 411 00:19:49,720 --> 00:19:52,240 Speaker 1: out from the other side of it, having lived through 412 00:19:52,280 --> 00:19:54,800 Speaker 1: this is going to make you a better not only 413 00:19:54,840 --> 00:19:57,520 Speaker 1: a better human being, because who cares about that, it's 414 00:19:57,560 --> 00:20:00,000 Speaker 1: going to make you a better business person. 415 00:20:00,080 --> 00:20:02,040 Speaker 2: Going to say, we'll make me some money. By the way, 416 00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:03,160 Speaker 2: I were green for you. 417 00:20:03,359 --> 00:20:06,240 Speaker 1: I love it. I was like, I've been so admiring im. 418 00:20:06,760 --> 00:20:07,480 Speaker 1: She looks good. 419 00:20:07,840 --> 00:20:11,000 Speaker 2: Oh my god, for you, I will put on a lip. 420 00:20:11,119 --> 00:20:12,640 Speaker 1: I feel so honored. 421 00:20:12,480 --> 00:20:14,439 Speaker 2: I've already been to Barnes and Noble. This morning, I 422 00:20:14,440 --> 00:20:16,360 Speaker 2: put on a red lip. I was like skipping through 423 00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:17,800 Speaker 2: lambs buying. 424 00:20:17,640 --> 00:20:20,159 Speaker 1: The book at Barnes and Noble. I was so frustrated 425 00:20:20,200 --> 00:20:22,879 Speaker 1: because the week we hit the New York Times Bestseller list, 426 00:20:23,040 --> 00:20:25,240 Speaker 1: they put all the other books out on the best 427 00:20:25,240 --> 00:20:26,600 Speaker 1: seller table and not ours. 428 00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:29,199 Speaker 2: I don't want to make you upset because I fixed it, 429 00:20:29,760 --> 00:20:32,639 Speaker 2: But do you know where I found your book? I 430 00:20:32,680 --> 00:20:34,640 Speaker 2: looked at all you know, they had that big display, 431 00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:37,360 Speaker 2: and I live in a really diverse area. I'm like, oh, 432 00:20:37,440 --> 00:20:40,280 Speaker 2: you know, I expect to see a diverse selection, and 433 00:20:40,320 --> 00:20:42,399 Speaker 2: they have one. But I wasn't seeing your book anywhere. 434 00:20:42,400 --> 00:20:43,680 Speaker 2: I'm like, I can't be missing this. This is a 435 00:20:43,840 --> 00:20:46,320 Speaker 2: This cover is extraordinary. And the kind woman at the 436 00:20:46,359 --> 00:20:48,880 Speaker 2: front desk, she was or at the cashier, she was like, oh, yeah, 437 00:20:48,880 --> 00:20:51,000 Speaker 2: it's back. There's like a pillar in the humor section. 438 00:20:51,280 --> 00:20:54,040 Speaker 2: While the humor section is like the skinniest column on 439 00:20:54,119 --> 00:20:56,960 Speaker 2: the back of a thing, it wasn't facing out. I 440 00:20:57,000 --> 00:20:58,960 Speaker 2: was like, this is a New York Times bestseller. So 441 00:20:59,040 --> 00:21:00,640 Speaker 2: I took the copies that were there and I move 442 00:21:00,680 --> 00:21:02,160 Speaker 2: them to the new and Noteworthy table. 443 00:21:02,240 --> 00:21:07,720 Speaker 1: Oh my god, you're so sweet. But this is this 444 00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:10,320 Speaker 1: is a thing. The system is not designed to help us. 445 00:21:10,600 --> 00:21:13,080 Speaker 1: And I hit the metric just like every other book, 446 00:21:13,320 --> 00:21:15,399 Speaker 1: because in the past they would be like, well, you know, 447 00:21:15,440 --> 00:21:18,399 Speaker 1: no one's buying it, but we're out selling almost every book. 448 00:21:18,440 --> 00:21:20,520 Speaker 1: Like if you look on Amazon, it's a best seller. 449 00:21:20,560 --> 00:21:23,679 Speaker 1: Now three four weeks later, we're hitting every metric. But 450 00:21:23,880 --> 00:21:26,080 Speaker 1: the system is not designed to help us. Like they 451 00:21:26,119 --> 00:21:29,640 Speaker 1: get a list from their you know, superiors or whoever, 452 00:21:30,160 --> 00:21:32,800 Speaker 1: and the list is usually names that they recognize. They 453 00:21:32,840 --> 00:21:35,280 Speaker 1: don't recognize the names Arena, so they're like, oh, just 454 00:21:35,280 --> 00:21:37,800 Speaker 1: stick her in the back somewhere. And this is something 455 00:21:37,840 --> 00:21:40,040 Speaker 1: also I deal with all the time, and I just 456 00:21:40,119 --> 00:21:42,399 Speaker 1: choose to see the humor in it because there is 457 00:21:42,440 --> 00:21:45,040 Speaker 1: no point yelling and screaming about all this. There's just 458 00:21:45,080 --> 00:21:48,239 Speaker 1: no point. It's not going to resolve the issue. I 459 00:21:48,400 --> 00:21:51,280 Speaker 1: choose to come with love, even though it does infuriate me. 460 00:21:52,040 --> 00:21:54,600 Speaker 1: It does infuriate me that like, why aren't you just 461 00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:57,639 Speaker 1: giving me equal treatment? I'm not asking for anything better. 462 00:21:57,920 --> 00:22:01,679 Speaker 2: But let's cover. Yeah, how do you how do you 463 00:22:01,720 --> 00:22:04,399 Speaker 2: make a cover like that? Did I just have someone 464 00:22:04,440 --> 00:22:05,520 Speaker 2: in a green hoodie? 465 00:22:05,760 --> 00:22:08,840 Speaker 1: I was a big guy and a cat stainted green, 466 00:22:09,080 --> 00:22:11,760 Speaker 1: and he had to like lift me so we could 467 00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:15,879 Speaker 1: get I was so scary. I was, guy's gonna break 468 00:22:15,920 --> 00:22:19,320 Speaker 1: his back? What are we doing? And the photographer was like, 469 00:22:19,480 --> 00:22:21,280 Speaker 1: just we're gonna get it. We're gonna get it. And 470 00:22:21,320 --> 00:22:23,760 Speaker 1: then I had to like kick my leg up in 471 00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:25,800 Speaker 1: the air. And I don't do this stuff, you know. 472 00:22:25,840 --> 00:22:28,080 Speaker 1: I just stand like a goofball and smile with my 473 00:22:28,160 --> 00:22:31,640 Speaker 1: mouth open, my teeth showing. So I I but he 474 00:22:31,760 --> 00:22:35,240 Speaker 1: was the photographer whose vision it was. C. J. Burton, 475 00:22:35,359 --> 00:22:38,040 Speaker 1: this digital photographer in la is such a nice guy. 476 00:22:38,240 --> 00:22:41,359 Speaker 1: He was like, you, I was very intent on having 477 00:22:41,359 --> 00:22:44,000 Speaker 1: a fun cover. What I didn't want is like, you know, 478 00:22:44,040 --> 00:22:47,080 Speaker 1: a lot of biographies and memoirs will have the close 479 00:22:47,160 --> 00:22:50,680 Speaker 1: up of the author's face and it's very deep in thought, 480 00:22:50,720 --> 00:22:54,200 Speaker 1: black and white. It's like, look at me, I'm so serious, 481 00:22:54,240 --> 00:22:56,119 Speaker 1: and I wanted to have fun with it. I was like, 482 00:22:56,280 --> 00:22:58,520 Speaker 1: I'm not so serious. If you meet me in real life, 483 00:22:58,640 --> 00:23:01,679 Speaker 1: I will make a joke about anything. So he came up. 484 00:23:01,720 --> 00:23:03,800 Speaker 1: We came up with a few concepts, but this one 485 00:23:03,840 --> 00:23:06,640 Speaker 1: was what felt like the most ambitious version. But when 486 00:23:06,680 --> 00:23:08,480 Speaker 1: I saw the guy who had to lift me. Is 487 00:23:08,480 --> 00:23:11,280 Speaker 1: a big guy, and he was poor guy. His whole forearm, 488 00:23:11,320 --> 00:23:15,000 Speaker 1: everything was painted guilty and the poor guy was stuck 489 00:23:15,080 --> 00:23:16,800 Speaker 1: the whole day in not being able to use his 490 00:23:16,960 --> 00:23:18,879 Speaker 1: arms because they didn't want to mess up the painting. 491 00:23:19,880 --> 00:23:23,080 Speaker 1: Oh okay, so I've had so much empathy. I was like, 492 00:23:23,160 --> 00:23:25,320 Speaker 1: oh my god, I'm so sorry. He's like, no, no, 493 00:23:25,359 --> 00:23:28,120 Speaker 1: I'm done. I haven't had water since exam. 494 00:23:29,680 --> 00:23:33,040 Speaker 2: We got to hold up the national treasure that is arnegarg. 495 00:23:33,440 --> 00:23:35,960 Speaker 2: I bet he was stoked. Plus you're so petite. 496 00:23:36,480 --> 00:23:38,679 Speaker 1: Oh my god, I am not so purtite. It was 497 00:23:38,840 --> 00:23:41,640 Speaker 1: not easy. I'm really heavy and I felt it that day. 498 00:23:41,640 --> 00:23:43,679 Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, I was just of 499 00:23:43,840 --> 00:23:46,080 Speaker 1: all the times I wish I had lost weight, today 500 00:23:46,200 --> 00:23:48,520 Speaker 1: is the most important day, man. 501 00:23:49,800 --> 00:23:51,600 Speaker 2: So you know a mutual friend of ours is for 502 00:23:51,640 --> 00:23:52,639 Speaker 2: a news to Robbie. 503 00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:54,920 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I love her, so. 504 00:23:54,880 --> 00:23:56,560 Speaker 2: I've you know, we're in the same kind of like 505 00:23:56,720 --> 00:24:01,679 Speaker 2: financial podcasting space and yeah, yeah, so she's wonderful. She 506 00:24:01,720 --> 00:24:04,640 Speaker 2: hosted an event for you in Jersey. Was it during 507 00:24:04,640 --> 00:24:06,840 Speaker 2: your book launch? And I was listening to your interview 508 00:24:06,840 --> 00:24:08,639 Speaker 2: with her and I was like, come on, zarn, I 509 00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:11,399 Speaker 2: don't tell me that you don't love your body. I'm like, 510 00:24:11,480 --> 00:24:13,520 Speaker 2: that's the that's what I thought was supposed to happen 511 00:24:13,560 --> 00:24:16,000 Speaker 2: when you're in your like forties, fifties, sixties, like you 512 00:24:16,119 --> 00:24:16,800 Speaker 2: just love it. 513 00:24:17,000 --> 00:24:20,199 Speaker 1: No, because the reality of being overweight hits you, hits you. 514 00:24:20,280 --> 00:24:22,639 Speaker 1: It's not the vanity. Honestly, it's not the vanity. I 515 00:24:22,640 --> 00:24:24,640 Speaker 1: don't really care. I'm not out there looking for a guy. 516 00:24:25,840 --> 00:24:30,200 Speaker 1: It's not that. It's the real statistics of what being 517 00:24:30,200 --> 00:24:33,679 Speaker 1: overweight means in terms of health, you know, and you 518 00:24:33,720 --> 00:24:35,560 Speaker 1: want to live like now, I want to live to 519 00:24:35,560 --> 00:24:36,960 Speaker 1: torture my daughter in law. 520 00:24:38,160 --> 00:24:41,600 Speaker 2: Right, and they don't get they don't get married so young. No, No, 521 00:24:42,000 --> 00:24:43,320 Speaker 2: she got to live really long. 522 00:24:43,240 --> 00:24:45,639 Speaker 1: You got it. Yeah, So it's that. But you know, 523 00:24:45,760 --> 00:24:48,639 Speaker 1: ever since I've found how to dress for my work, 524 00:24:48,840 --> 00:24:51,600 Speaker 1: I feel like I'm more at peace. For a long time, 525 00:24:51,720 --> 00:24:53,960 Speaker 1: I was just not at peace with my body. I 526 00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:56,400 Speaker 1: don't get into that with the book, but because it's 527 00:24:56,440 --> 00:24:59,120 Speaker 1: not really part of the story in that way. But 528 00:24:59,280 --> 00:25:02,760 Speaker 1: to be on and to be making jokes for as 529 00:25:02,800 --> 00:25:05,320 Speaker 1: long as I do hour hour and a half straight 530 00:25:05,560 --> 00:25:08,480 Speaker 1: in front of huge audiences. I just did five thousand 531 00:25:08,560 --> 00:25:11,439 Speaker 1: people recently in Vegas, to be able to do that. 532 00:25:11,520 --> 00:25:15,240 Speaker 1: You're very comfortable in your skin and in your body 533 00:25:15,320 --> 00:25:17,359 Speaker 1: and in how the world is looking at you. And 534 00:25:17,480 --> 00:25:20,440 Speaker 1: until I learned to dress for myself and figure out 535 00:25:20,480 --> 00:25:24,240 Speaker 1: an outfit uniform that works for me, I just wasn't there. 536 00:25:24,400 --> 00:25:27,000 Speaker 1: It was very hard for me to make my peace 537 00:25:27,119 --> 00:25:29,240 Speaker 1: with Oh my god, people are gonna see me. They'll 538 00:25:29,240 --> 00:25:31,600 Speaker 1: take photographs from this side and this side, and like, 539 00:25:31,640 --> 00:25:33,480 Speaker 1: what am I going to look like? I figured out 540 00:25:33,480 --> 00:25:37,560 Speaker 1: an outfit that felt simple but representative of me, and 541 00:25:37,640 --> 00:25:40,160 Speaker 1: now I don't really care take a photo from any anger. 542 00:25:40,240 --> 00:25:42,359 Speaker 1: I don't care because I feel like I'm covered and 543 00:25:42,400 --> 00:25:46,760 Speaker 1: I look decent and elegant, and I'm good with that. 544 00:25:47,080 --> 00:25:49,280 Speaker 2: You were trying to find your look, and I did 545 00:25:49,320 --> 00:25:51,879 Speaker 2: think that that was highly relevant, just for anyone who's 546 00:25:51,880 --> 00:25:53,840 Speaker 2: not even about being on a stage, but just like 547 00:25:54,359 --> 00:25:57,760 Speaker 2: going through life and maybe your body is, you know, 548 00:25:58,160 --> 00:26:00,159 Speaker 2: not the body that it was twenty years ago, pre 549 00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:02,800 Speaker 2: kids or whatever, and just I thought it was a 550 00:26:02,840 --> 00:26:05,240 Speaker 2: great testament to the power of making clothes for the 551 00:26:05,240 --> 00:26:07,720 Speaker 2: body you have now, and like getting a look that 552 00:26:07,760 --> 00:26:10,720 Speaker 2: makes you feel comfortable and a thousand percent there is 553 00:26:10,760 --> 00:26:14,040 Speaker 2: something that happens when you're wearing something that just makes 554 00:26:14,080 --> 00:26:17,520 Speaker 2: you feel good. Yeah, that gives you the confidence to 555 00:26:17,560 --> 00:26:18,640 Speaker 2: do a scary thing. 556 00:26:19,119 --> 00:26:21,639 Speaker 1: One hundred and ten percent. And I'm telling you that 557 00:26:21,920 --> 00:26:25,840 Speaker 1: I appreciate that I had the good sense to stick 558 00:26:25,880 --> 00:26:29,520 Speaker 1: with it because people in India, especially fashionable people, make 559 00:26:29,560 --> 00:26:32,240 Speaker 1: fun of me all the time. Even right now. They think, Oh, 560 00:26:32,320 --> 00:26:35,000 Speaker 1: you wear the same thing in four different colors. What 561 00:26:35,160 --> 00:26:38,520 Speaker 1: is that belt? Because the belt is not an Indian thing. 562 00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:41,960 Speaker 1: We in Indian clothes usually are not belted the way 563 00:26:42,000 --> 00:26:45,240 Speaker 1: I built them. Here, I added that, and I get 564 00:26:45,280 --> 00:26:47,199 Speaker 1: my tailor to make the belt for me. It was 565 00:26:47,240 --> 00:26:49,560 Speaker 1: a process to learn how to do it, and you know, 566 00:26:50,320 --> 00:26:53,040 Speaker 1: but I wanted it because I felt like in America 567 00:26:53,560 --> 00:26:55,800 Speaker 1: it needed to look a certain way. Whatever it is. 568 00:26:55,840 --> 00:26:58,680 Speaker 1: It was my decision and my process. But people make 569 00:26:58,720 --> 00:27:01,760 Speaker 1: fun of me constantly. They are fashion blogs that feel 570 00:27:01,800 --> 00:27:04,200 Speaker 1: free to pick on me, and you know, it's like, oh, 571 00:27:04,240 --> 00:27:07,840 Speaker 1: here comes the American Indian because they think that I've 572 00:27:07,880 --> 00:27:10,639 Speaker 1: created this crazy outfit. But I don't care because I 573 00:27:10,720 --> 00:27:13,320 Speaker 1: feel good in it and I feel like my audience 574 00:27:13,359 --> 00:27:16,680 Speaker 1: sees me for what I'm trying to show them that 575 00:27:17,119 --> 00:27:19,959 Speaker 1: I am Indian, that I am a certain type of 576 00:27:20,600 --> 00:27:23,640 Speaker 1: you know, person, I believe in dressing modestly. I don't 577 00:27:23,640 --> 00:27:25,959 Speaker 1: need to show any more than you can see. So 578 00:27:26,440 --> 00:27:29,159 Speaker 1: it was a process, and really I started doing it 579 00:27:29,200 --> 00:27:32,800 Speaker 1: more and more because it affects the business. It's again 580 00:27:32,920 --> 00:27:35,920 Speaker 1: not a vanity thing. The better you look, the more 581 00:27:35,920 --> 00:27:39,920 Speaker 1: confident you are, the more confident you feel, the more 582 00:27:39,960 --> 00:27:44,280 Speaker 1: money you will make. It translates into real dollars and cents. 583 00:27:45,200 --> 00:27:48,600 Speaker 1: And that's actually pretty undeniable at this point because there's 584 00:27:48,720 --> 00:27:53,080 Speaker 1: even data out there to support it. But I never 585 00:27:53,280 --> 00:27:57,000 Speaker 1: till forty four, never wore a lick of makeup. Never. 586 00:27:57,320 --> 00:27:59,200 Speaker 1: I used to go to weddings with like a little 587 00:27:59,240 --> 00:28:01,440 Speaker 1: touch of vasiline on my lips. That's it. I can 588 00:28:01,440 --> 00:28:03,359 Speaker 1: show you wedding photos Bathleene. 589 00:28:03,640 --> 00:28:05,399 Speaker 2: Yeah, well you can't have ashy lips at least you 590 00:28:05,400 --> 00:28:05,760 Speaker 2: put that on. 591 00:28:05,800 --> 00:28:09,720 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, it's that simple. Because as a consumer of 592 00:28:09,960 --> 00:28:12,639 Speaker 1: pop culture, I used to always think, how crazy is 593 00:28:12,680 --> 00:28:16,879 Speaker 1: this woman? Or why is this man getting another like whatever, liposuction? 594 00:28:17,040 --> 00:28:19,720 Speaker 1: What why would you do that? I would never And 595 00:28:19,760 --> 00:28:22,080 Speaker 1: now I know why they're doing it. They're doing it 596 00:28:22,119 --> 00:28:23,160 Speaker 1: for their business. 597 00:28:23,840 --> 00:28:26,199 Speaker 2: Well can we talk about business? Because you are a 598 00:28:26,240 --> 00:28:29,520 Speaker 2: business guru like I don't almost. I'm a little afraid 599 00:28:29,600 --> 00:28:31,960 Speaker 2: that a bunch of people are going to try to have, 600 00:28:32,040 --> 00:28:34,680 Speaker 2: like you know, these creative careers in their mid forty 601 00:28:34,760 --> 00:28:37,920 Speaker 2: late forties, inspired by your story, if they don't understand 602 00:28:37,920 --> 00:28:41,320 Speaker 2: that you didn't just try it out like you went 603 00:28:41,840 --> 00:28:45,280 Speaker 2: full tilt, like I am going to be the Zuckerberger 604 00:28:45,280 --> 00:28:48,640 Speaker 2: of comedians, I'm going to be the Serena Williams of comedy. 605 00:28:48,680 --> 00:28:51,640 Speaker 2: And really think of it from a business standpoint, and 606 00:28:51,920 --> 00:28:55,840 Speaker 2: you made some choices. You chose to keep your comedy clean, 607 00:28:55,960 --> 00:28:58,240 Speaker 2: which I'm not sure that just means no curse. 608 00:28:58,040 --> 00:28:59,600 Speaker 1: Words basically pretty much. 609 00:28:59,720 --> 00:29:01,120 Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, I don't know. I heard a joke 610 00:29:01,160 --> 00:29:03,400 Speaker 2: where you called your your mother in law the sea word. 611 00:29:03,800 --> 00:29:06,840 Speaker 1: So there's a few handful of jokes where I have 612 00:29:07,000 --> 00:29:09,200 Speaker 1: cursed words that I use in the clubs all the 613 00:29:09,280 --> 00:29:13,760 Speaker 1: time and depending on the book. But I have replacements 614 00:29:13,800 --> 00:29:16,080 Speaker 1: for all those words for my corporate shows. So I 615 00:29:16,240 --> 00:29:19,240 Speaker 1: do shows that have the same jokes but with the replacement, 616 00:29:19,400 --> 00:29:22,720 Speaker 1: which is also as funny because the money is in 617 00:29:22,800 --> 00:29:25,240 Speaker 1: clean comedy. If you see all the big comics and 618 00:29:25,240 --> 00:29:28,800 Speaker 1: how they translate to bigger, big gigs, it's all clean 619 00:29:28,840 --> 00:29:32,120 Speaker 1: comedy unless you're that niche comic one in a billion 620 00:29:32,160 --> 00:29:35,880 Speaker 1: who becomes known for their dirty humor. And I wouldn't 621 00:29:35,880 --> 00:29:38,600 Speaker 1: even know what to say, honestly, Like I'm not sex 622 00:29:38,600 --> 00:29:40,560 Speaker 1: stuff like that, Like I have nothing to say in 623 00:29:40,560 --> 00:29:41,960 Speaker 1: that space. What you mean? 624 00:29:43,400 --> 00:29:45,920 Speaker 2: I mean, I know what jokes were you were, you 625 00:29:45,960 --> 00:29:49,440 Speaker 2: were Dragon shell Ub around, you know, making out in 626 00:29:49,480 --> 00:29:52,120 Speaker 2: the in the cab when you first met him. If 627 00:29:52,160 --> 00:29:54,480 Speaker 2: you guys, I don't want to. I can talk about 628 00:29:54,520 --> 00:29:56,600 Speaker 2: everything I want to keep about, you know, the fun 629 00:29:56,680 --> 00:29:59,200 Speaker 2: money stuff, but the story of you and Shellubs like 630 00:29:59,360 --> 00:30:03,440 Speaker 2: courtship and oh I loved it so much. It was 631 00:30:03,480 --> 00:30:05,760 Speaker 2: so cute. I can see how y'all fell in love 632 00:30:05,800 --> 00:30:10,959 Speaker 2: through letters. You're both so funny and both so steeped 633 00:30:11,000 --> 00:30:13,080 Speaker 2: in reality that you're like calling each other out on 634 00:30:13,160 --> 00:30:16,960 Speaker 2: you know, your bs and ah, what a sweet. Well. Actually, 635 00:30:17,160 --> 00:30:18,840 Speaker 2: I am going to give shell up some shine because 636 00:30:18,880 --> 00:30:21,360 Speaker 2: there's this part in the book, multiple parts where just 637 00:30:21,600 --> 00:30:23,880 Speaker 2: it's like that Grinch, the moment in the Grinch, you know, 638 00:30:23,920 --> 00:30:26,640 Speaker 2: the Grinch, the green guy, and his heart just grows 639 00:30:26,760 --> 00:30:30,040 Speaker 2: take a yeah, and then his heart just grows like 640 00:30:30,080 --> 00:30:32,400 Speaker 2: three times bigger. And there's moments in your book that 641 00:30:32,480 --> 00:30:34,160 Speaker 2: do that for me, and one of them is your 642 00:30:34,240 --> 00:30:38,520 Speaker 2: beautiful husband of twenty five years. Yeah, when y'all are 643 00:30:38,560 --> 00:30:40,520 Speaker 2: at a dinner with like some of his hoity toity 644 00:30:41,040 --> 00:30:43,160 Speaker 2: Wall Street friends and their wives, and at this point, 645 00:30:43,200 --> 00:30:45,480 Speaker 2: you are determined to figure out what this stage of 646 00:30:45,480 --> 00:30:47,400 Speaker 2: your life's going to be. At your you're feeling like 647 00:30:47,440 --> 00:30:49,880 Speaker 2: something is missing, so you're trying to start all these businesses, 648 00:30:50,000 --> 00:30:53,680 Speaker 2: like a toothbrush business, a chill a vegan chili business, 649 00:30:53,760 --> 00:30:56,360 Speaker 2: all these things, and they're kind of like they're kind 650 00:30:56,360 --> 00:30:59,080 Speaker 2: of ribbing you about it in a way that's not 651 00:30:59,160 --> 00:31:01,680 Speaker 2: so kind, and your husban and like, don't worry. They're 652 00:31:01,720 --> 00:31:04,040 Speaker 2: just afraid that when you actually find your thing, you're 653 00:31:04,080 --> 00:31:07,240 Speaker 2: going to become unstoppable. And he just says it so 654 00:31:07,400 --> 00:31:09,520 Speaker 2: nonchalantly and just continues eating his dinner. 655 00:31:09,920 --> 00:31:11,560 Speaker 1: That's his special talent. 656 00:31:13,120 --> 00:31:19,360 Speaker 2: Sweet, so romantic forget roses, like defend my greatness in 657 00:31:19,400 --> 00:31:21,760 Speaker 2: front of all your friends and also make them feel 658 00:31:21,960 --> 00:31:22,640 Speaker 2: in the process. 659 00:31:22,720 --> 00:31:27,040 Speaker 1: For me, it's true, he is particularly adept at that 660 00:31:27,200 --> 00:31:30,840 Speaker 1: type of dialogue. And that's in real life who he is. 661 00:31:31,080 --> 00:31:35,120 Speaker 1: He's not one to make grand statements. He barely speaks. 662 00:31:35,160 --> 00:31:37,480 Speaker 1: I mean, if he says five words in a day 663 00:31:37,520 --> 00:31:41,040 Speaker 1: that's a lot. So he just engages when he feels 664 00:31:41,040 --> 00:31:43,800 Speaker 1: like he absolutely must, and otherwise he's kind of like 665 00:31:44,080 --> 00:31:46,440 Speaker 1: he's a little flighty in his everyday life. A lot 666 00:31:46,480 --> 00:31:48,560 Speaker 1: of people would be like, he just saw right through me. 667 00:31:48,640 --> 00:31:50,920 Speaker 1: I saw him on the street. He didn't say hello. 668 00:31:51,280 --> 00:31:54,840 Speaker 1: But it's not him being disrespectful. He really lives in 669 00:31:54,880 --> 00:31:57,880 Speaker 1: his own world of numbers and like he's thinking about 670 00:31:57,880 --> 00:31:59,960 Speaker 1: what trade he made and what he wants to make 671 00:32:00,240 --> 00:32:03,040 Speaker 1: and how is that math gonna work out? And like 672 00:32:03,120 --> 00:32:05,920 Speaker 1: he's like a happy, flighty math guy. 673 00:32:06,960 --> 00:32:09,520 Speaker 2: Intellect cerebral, Yeah, yeah, I mean I. 674 00:32:09,440 --> 00:32:11,479 Speaker 1: Don't even I find it hard to call him an 675 00:32:11,480 --> 00:32:18,440 Speaker 1: intellect because he's not that smart. He does ridiculously stupid 676 00:32:18,440 --> 00:32:23,280 Speaker 1: things everything. I remember when I was newly married to him, 677 00:32:23,320 --> 00:32:25,400 Speaker 1: I was like, how are these people paying you? You 678 00:32:25,440 --> 00:32:26,880 Speaker 1: can't figure anything out? 679 00:32:29,000 --> 00:32:31,680 Speaker 2: Well, there's number smart, I guess. 680 00:32:31,760 --> 00:32:34,760 Speaker 1: Yeah, No, he is. He's like, but he doesn't wear 681 00:32:34,800 --> 00:32:37,800 Speaker 1: his intellect. You know. Some successful people like to talk 682 00:32:37,880 --> 00:32:42,800 Speaker 1: like their fonts of wisdom, Like they will release tweets 683 00:32:42,840 --> 00:32:46,560 Speaker 1: like like God has spoken. There will be LinkedIn articles 684 00:32:46,600 --> 00:32:48,880 Speaker 1: from them, like you know, the state of the affair 685 00:32:49,200 --> 00:32:52,160 Speaker 1: that is not my husband at all, never was even 686 00:32:52,200 --> 00:32:54,920 Speaker 1: in his most successful he was like, can I just 687 00:32:54,960 --> 00:32:57,880 Speaker 1: go to bed? Please don't invite me, Please, God, don't 688 00:32:57,880 --> 00:32:59,880 Speaker 1: invite me to all these events, Like I don't want 689 00:32:59,880 --> 00:33:01,600 Speaker 1: to be there. I want to be home. I want 690 00:33:01,600 --> 00:33:03,760 Speaker 1: to be like taking a nap. So he was always 691 00:33:03,800 --> 00:33:07,480 Speaker 1: that simple guy, and he still is, like he barely communicates, 692 00:33:07,520 --> 00:33:12,200 Speaker 1: and when he's he's definitely him. And I have a 693 00:33:12,280 --> 00:33:17,200 Speaker 1: friendship that is above everything else. So if he finds 694 00:33:17,280 --> 00:33:19,720 Speaker 1: that people are making fun of me, which happens all 695 00:33:19,760 --> 00:33:22,280 Speaker 1: the time, I mean it happens even now. But back 696 00:33:22,360 --> 00:33:27,800 Speaker 1: during the transition phase before I found comedy, it was peak. 697 00:33:28,200 --> 00:33:32,520 Speaker 1: I mean I was ripe for jokes for everybody because 698 00:33:32,560 --> 00:33:35,800 Speaker 1: I also, in defense of all of them, I didn't 699 00:33:35,840 --> 00:33:39,200 Speaker 1: just start businesses. I started businesses. 700 00:33:39,360 --> 00:33:40,200 Speaker 2: I don't do anything. 701 00:33:40,440 --> 00:33:43,960 Speaker 1: Here's my website, here's my card, here's you know, my 702 00:33:44,320 --> 00:33:47,000 Speaker 1: entire vision. I didn't just start a business. I saw 703 00:33:47,040 --> 00:33:51,240 Speaker 1: a billion dollar vision instantly. In every failed business, you know, 704 00:33:51,400 --> 00:33:53,840 Speaker 1: some people would be like work in silence. No, No, 705 00:33:53,920 --> 00:33:57,560 Speaker 1: that was not me. So people had a lot to 706 00:33:57,600 --> 00:33:59,680 Speaker 1: pick on. I gave them a lot to pick on. 707 00:34:00,840 --> 00:34:03,840 Speaker 1: So my husband, when he would step in, would be 708 00:34:04,000 --> 00:34:07,480 Speaker 1: like you know, they're just all nervous because none of 709 00:34:07,520 --> 00:34:08,760 Speaker 1: them are even trying anything. 710 00:34:09,320 --> 00:34:10,799 Speaker 2: M hmm. They don't know what to do with you. 711 00:34:11,000 --> 00:34:13,960 Speaker 1: Yeah, they don't know, and they didn't come from the 712 00:34:14,000 --> 00:34:17,360 Speaker 1: world where all you did. I didn't think of myself 713 00:34:17,400 --> 00:34:21,480 Speaker 1: as somebody whose life's goal was to support her husband. 714 00:34:21,520 --> 00:34:24,560 Speaker 1: It was a part of my job as a wife, 715 00:34:24,600 --> 00:34:26,960 Speaker 1: a mother, and a homemaker, but I didn't see it 716 00:34:27,000 --> 00:34:29,520 Speaker 1: as the be all and end all of my identity. 717 00:34:29,960 --> 00:34:32,160 Speaker 1: Like I never was that woman who wanted to go 718 00:34:32,280 --> 00:34:34,560 Speaker 1: places and be like I am missus so and so, 719 00:34:34,920 --> 00:34:37,319 Speaker 1: no matter who the husband was, no matter if he 720 00:34:37,360 --> 00:34:40,560 Speaker 1: was a billionaire or whatever. Like I was always inside 721 00:34:40,640 --> 00:34:43,640 Speaker 1: my body fighting for my own like what is my 722 00:34:43,960 --> 00:34:47,120 Speaker 1: journey in this life? Like? What is my thing? And 723 00:34:47,160 --> 00:34:48,239 Speaker 1: how am I gonna find it? 724 00:34:49,280 --> 00:34:51,440 Speaker 2: I mean, can we just go back in time a 725 00:34:51,440 --> 00:34:54,040 Speaker 2: little bit, because as you're talking about that sort of 726 00:34:54,080 --> 00:34:57,040 Speaker 2: not seeing yourself as fulfilling the life goal for your 727 00:34:57,080 --> 00:34:59,400 Speaker 2: husband and finding your own purpose, I mean that was 728 00:34:59,480 --> 00:35:02,040 Speaker 2: so innate in you from a young age. I mean 729 00:35:02,200 --> 00:35:05,200 Speaker 2: you were a teenager when your husband you write about 730 00:35:05,200 --> 00:35:08,080 Speaker 2: this in the book, not your husband, sorry, your your father. 731 00:35:08,400 --> 00:35:10,800 Speaker 2: After your mother passed away, was pretty much ready to 732 00:35:10,840 --> 00:35:13,040 Speaker 2: throw you away and say I'm going to marry you off. 733 00:35:13,080 --> 00:35:15,880 Speaker 2: You're a teenager. You're thirteen fourteen, yeah at this age, 734 00:35:16,239 --> 00:35:22,279 Speaker 2: which is not uncommon right in India even today, And you, 735 00:35:22,520 --> 00:35:26,200 Speaker 2: as a teenager, said I would rather live on the streets, 736 00:35:26,400 --> 00:35:30,320 Speaker 2: bouncing from home to home, friends homes, friends of friends' homes, 737 00:35:30,360 --> 00:35:33,719 Speaker 2: and to sign up for security, to sign up for 738 00:35:34,800 --> 00:35:38,200 Speaker 2: this arranged marriage. And I mean, oh, I just as 739 00:35:38,200 --> 00:35:40,360 Speaker 2: a mom, I'm just like protect the babies. And you 740 00:35:40,400 --> 00:35:42,680 Speaker 2: were just a baby. But you did that. That's so 741 00:35:43,400 --> 00:35:45,319 Speaker 2: I don't know what to even say about that, just. 742 00:35:45,280 --> 00:35:47,960 Speaker 1: To be completely fair and honest, like I didn't know 743 00:35:48,080 --> 00:35:50,080 Speaker 1: I was signing up for that. I did when you 744 00:35:50,080 --> 00:35:53,000 Speaker 1: were a teenager, and you were like, are defying your parents? 745 00:35:53,000 --> 00:35:54,560 Speaker 1: And you're like, all right, if you don't want me 746 00:35:54,600 --> 00:35:57,120 Speaker 1: to live your live with my friends. In your innocence, 747 00:35:57,120 --> 00:36:00,960 Speaker 1: you really believe that's an option, you know what I mean? Like, 748 00:36:01,160 --> 00:36:04,200 Speaker 1: because you've done sleepovers that went for a weekend and 749 00:36:04,239 --> 00:36:08,160 Speaker 1: no one sent you home, So you've traveled. Maybe I 750 00:36:08,239 --> 00:36:10,719 Speaker 1: at that point had traveled with my friend's families to 751 00:36:10,920 --> 00:36:14,640 Speaker 1: like nearby vacation spots. I was like, yeah, well, you 752 00:36:14,680 --> 00:36:17,919 Speaker 1: know what, you don't want me here? So nice, they 753 00:36:17,920 --> 00:36:19,840 Speaker 1: feed me, they let me do all these things you 754 00:36:19,840 --> 00:36:22,000 Speaker 1: don't let me do, Like I'll just go there. When 755 00:36:22,160 --> 00:36:25,040 Speaker 1: I walked out of my house, I really didn't think 756 00:36:25,120 --> 00:36:28,399 Speaker 1: it would become what it became. And I really thought 757 00:36:28,440 --> 00:36:31,560 Speaker 1: that my dad was consumed by grief and that in 758 00:36:31,600 --> 00:36:33,640 Speaker 1: a matter of a day or two or three he 759 00:36:33,719 --> 00:36:36,160 Speaker 1: will come around and then we will find a new 760 00:36:36,719 --> 00:36:39,880 Speaker 1: happy medium. He was not playing, and I learned that 761 00:36:40,000 --> 00:36:43,920 Speaker 1: the hard way that and that is true of many, many, many, 762 00:36:43,960 --> 00:36:47,239 Speaker 1: many men of color. I think they like stake their 763 00:36:47,280 --> 00:36:51,440 Speaker 1: pride and dignity on everything, especially back home, and and 764 00:36:51,640 --> 00:36:54,800 Speaker 1: my dad was not having it. And also like women 765 00:36:54,960 --> 00:36:58,520 Speaker 1: were throwing themselves on him, left, right and center. So 766 00:36:58,640 --> 00:37:02,400 Speaker 1: he had so much tempt. I know that now in hindsight, 767 00:37:03,080 --> 00:37:06,440 Speaker 1: Like he had young women, like women twenty years younger 768 00:37:06,480 --> 00:37:10,680 Speaker 1: than him, being like, do you need anything? Do you 769 00:37:10,760 --> 00:37:12,200 Speaker 1: need it? It was a lot of like. 770 00:37:12,600 --> 00:37:14,560 Speaker 2: What can we do to help you with the Indian 771 00:37:14,640 --> 00:37:16,520 Speaker 2: version of making a cast role and bringing it. 772 00:37:16,400 --> 00:37:22,160 Speaker 1: Over, making samosas, making you know, like it was wild. 773 00:37:22,320 --> 00:37:25,120 Speaker 1: And that's another thing that I've learned, you know, because 774 00:37:25,160 --> 00:37:28,160 Speaker 1: I saw it firsthand in my life. That men will 775 00:37:28,160 --> 00:37:31,520 Speaker 1: go on. I've seen it enough to know that their 776 00:37:31,560 --> 00:37:33,680 Speaker 1: lives will go on. It's the women. I read a 777 00:37:33,680 --> 00:37:36,480 Speaker 1: statistic somewhere a long time ago, and I don't even 778 00:37:36,520 --> 00:37:38,680 Speaker 1: know where I read it because and if I'm wrong, 779 00:37:38,880 --> 00:37:41,719 Speaker 1: somebody can feel free to correct me. But I read 780 00:37:41,719 --> 00:37:44,480 Speaker 1: a statistic somewhere that said that the face of poverty 781 00:37:44,520 --> 00:37:51,520 Speaker 1: in America is motherhood. That women who are single moms, 782 00:37:51,600 --> 00:37:56,200 Speaker 1: who are moms in general, become a much more prone 783 00:37:56,280 --> 00:37:59,640 Speaker 1: to living in poverty than any other demographic. That's the 784 00:37:59,680 --> 00:38:02,919 Speaker 1: step statistic that scared me. That is another reason why 785 00:38:02,920 --> 00:38:06,200 Speaker 1: I was like, I've got to figure something out, something anything. 786 00:38:06,360 --> 00:38:09,560 Speaker 1: I was like, I will become the world's best dental hygienis. 787 00:38:09,600 --> 00:38:12,399 Speaker 1: If somebody good gives me a job, I will take 788 00:38:12,480 --> 00:38:14,759 Speaker 1: such good care of them if they can like give 789 00:38:14,840 --> 00:38:19,279 Speaker 1: me some financial security. This was during the days when 790 00:38:19,320 --> 00:38:22,520 Speaker 1: nothing entrepreneurial was working. I was like, what else can 791 00:38:22,560 --> 00:38:25,359 Speaker 1: I do? Like, can I become a receptionist somewhere where 792 00:38:25,360 --> 00:38:28,560 Speaker 1: they will like pay me and you know all these things. 793 00:38:28,600 --> 00:38:32,239 Speaker 1: So but knowing that that the outcome for women and 794 00:38:32,480 --> 00:38:35,400 Speaker 1: I have three kids, like you know, they're gonna need stuff. 795 00:38:35,600 --> 00:38:38,799 Speaker 1: My daughter's graduate in college. She still needs stuff. It 796 00:38:38,840 --> 00:38:40,319 Speaker 1: doesn't end, you know. 797 00:38:40,560 --> 00:38:44,120 Speaker 2: And also in New York, the money will dry up. 798 00:38:44,400 --> 00:38:47,520 Speaker 1: Oh my god. When my husband lost his job, he 799 00:38:47,600 --> 00:38:51,400 Speaker 1: had been a cio for ten years, we had savings. 800 00:38:51,719 --> 00:38:53,719 Speaker 1: People will ask me, did you not have savings. We 801 00:38:53,800 --> 00:38:58,600 Speaker 1: had savings. We thought we were set, and it went 802 00:38:59,120 --> 00:39:03,640 Speaker 1: like a day. It felt like with the decision, it 803 00:39:03,640 --> 00:39:06,680 Speaker 1: felt like we found out on Monday that he doesn't 804 00:39:06,680 --> 00:39:09,000 Speaker 1: have a job, and two Mondays from then it was 805 00:39:09,040 --> 00:39:11,880 Speaker 1: all gone. It felt like that, like my god, we 806 00:39:11,920 --> 00:39:14,239 Speaker 1: had it. Oh my god. And then when things are 807 00:39:14,280 --> 00:39:16,560 Speaker 1: not gonna work, nothing works, Like we couldn't sell the 808 00:39:16,560 --> 00:39:19,600 Speaker 1: apartment because the market crashed. Every turn that we tried 809 00:39:19,640 --> 00:39:24,120 Speaker 1: to consider was like, this can't work. That can't work, 810 00:39:24,160 --> 00:39:26,719 Speaker 1: that can't work, this won't work. So you really have 811 00:39:26,840 --> 00:39:29,319 Speaker 1: to prepare. That's another reason why I work as much 812 00:39:29,320 --> 00:39:31,279 Speaker 1: as I do now. I feel like I have to 813 00:39:31,320 --> 00:39:33,520 Speaker 1: catch up for all the years that I couldn't do 814 00:39:33,640 --> 00:39:37,120 Speaker 1: the things that I didn't work for whatever reason. And 815 00:39:37,360 --> 00:39:40,319 Speaker 1: I don't have time to waste, you know. And I 816 00:39:40,360 --> 00:39:44,279 Speaker 1: advise a lot of women on thinking big. Once you're 817 00:39:44,320 --> 00:39:48,040 Speaker 1: playing the game, you got to think big because women 818 00:39:48,280 --> 00:39:51,239 Speaker 1: are trained to think savings. We think, oh, if I 819 00:39:51,280 --> 00:39:54,319 Speaker 1: save money, you know, if I don't spend it. I 820 00:39:54,360 --> 00:39:56,799 Speaker 1: don't think there's any glory in saving. You cannot save 821 00:39:56,840 --> 00:39:59,400 Speaker 1: yourself out of financial mess. 822 00:39:59,440 --> 00:40:02,200 Speaker 2: You have to think, yes, Sarna, you have to. You're 823 00:40:02,200 --> 00:40:05,879 Speaker 2: a medical financial genius. What are you talking about? Yes? 824 00:40:05,960 --> 00:40:08,960 Speaker 1: Continue, At least I'm closer to math than I was 825 00:40:09,000 --> 00:40:09,520 Speaker 1: as a writer. 826 00:40:10,160 --> 00:40:12,479 Speaker 2: I'm sorry, drop the gem. People need to hear the gem. 827 00:40:12,719 --> 00:40:16,520 Speaker 1: Tell them. Tell us then what I'm saying. We are told, oh, 828 00:40:16,640 --> 00:40:19,160 Speaker 1: don't buy the coffee, don't get the manicure, Like that 829 00:40:19,320 --> 00:40:21,080 Speaker 1: is not going to save you in the end. If 830 00:40:21,120 --> 00:40:24,120 Speaker 1: you never buy the coffee and you never have the manicure, 831 00:40:24,160 --> 00:40:27,120 Speaker 1: you're not going to be financially secure. It's it's nonsense. 832 00:40:27,239 --> 00:40:29,160 Speaker 1: And some guy came up with it just because he's 833 00:40:29,200 --> 00:40:32,040 Speaker 1: irritated that women are trying to be happy. You know. 834 00:40:33,000 --> 00:40:35,520 Speaker 1: But if you think big from you, that's how you're 835 00:40:35,560 --> 00:40:37,680 Speaker 1: going to build equity in a business. That's how you're 836 00:40:37,719 --> 00:40:41,759 Speaker 1: going to make enough money that will be like a sizable, 837 00:40:41,800 --> 00:40:44,920 Speaker 1: a meaningful amount that you can actually invest and build 838 00:40:44,960 --> 00:40:47,640 Speaker 1: other things for yourself and for your family, even for 839 00:40:47,719 --> 00:40:49,879 Speaker 1: my own kids, like my own daughter I teach her 840 00:40:49,880 --> 00:40:52,400 Speaker 1: every day I go. You have to like, live the 841 00:40:52,440 --> 00:40:54,799 Speaker 1: life you want. Live the life you want to do 842 00:40:54,880 --> 00:40:58,440 Speaker 1: that yoga class every few days. Do the yoga class, 843 00:40:58,440 --> 00:41:00,279 Speaker 1: but figure out how you're going to earn them money. 844 00:41:00,880 --> 00:41:05,320 Speaker 1: Contracting yourself and trying to live within this tiny bubble 845 00:41:05,400 --> 00:41:07,560 Speaker 1: that you think is all you can earn is not 846 00:41:07,680 --> 00:41:11,319 Speaker 1: the answer to your growth. Not for me anyway. I'm 847 00:41:11,360 --> 00:41:13,600 Speaker 1: all about I spend a lot of money now, I 848 00:41:13,600 --> 00:41:15,960 Speaker 1: spend a crazy amount of money, but it's all investment. 849 00:41:16,040 --> 00:41:19,680 Speaker 1: To me, it's all investment because I buy back time. 850 00:41:19,920 --> 00:41:22,239 Speaker 1: For example, I don't drive. I haven't driven a car 851 00:41:22,320 --> 00:41:25,000 Speaker 1: in years because I sit in the back seat of 852 00:41:25,000 --> 00:41:27,759 Speaker 1: a taxi or an uber and I work throughout. I 853 00:41:27,800 --> 00:41:31,120 Speaker 1: don't waste a minute. You will never see me wasting 854 00:41:31,160 --> 00:41:33,400 Speaker 1: time in the back seat of any car because to me, 855 00:41:33,520 --> 00:41:37,440 Speaker 1: that's my office. It's like a mobile office. I like 856 00:41:37,520 --> 00:41:39,680 Speaker 1: to say work, don't work from home, work from uber 857 00:41:40,400 --> 00:41:42,880 Speaker 1: because I go places I would not you know, I 858 00:41:42,960 --> 00:41:45,719 Speaker 1: go places, I meet people. I'm constantly on the road. 859 00:41:46,200 --> 00:41:48,560 Speaker 1: You know, if you're in or around the New York area, 860 00:41:48,640 --> 00:41:51,880 Speaker 1: there's so many interesting people to meet on the daily. 861 00:41:52,320 --> 00:41:55,239 Speaker 1: Don't restrict yourself to the geography of where you are, 862 00:41:55,360 --> 00:41:58,560 Speaker 1: because the whole point of living in this neighborhood is 863 00:41:58,600 --> 00:42:01,880 Speaker 1: in this area as you meet everybody who's here to 864 00:42:01,920 --> 00:42:03,560 Speaker 1: do all the things that they're here to do. This 865 00:42:03,680 --> 00:42:07,200 Speaker 1: is the world capital of ambition, you know. 866 00:42:07,840 --> 00:42:09,520 Speaker 2: You know, I think that's been the hardest thing for me, 867 00:42:09,560 --> 00:42:12,160 Speaker 2: if I'm really honest, is when my husband grew up 868 00:42:12,160 --> 00:42:14,880 Speaker 2: in the city of New York. I'm from the suburbs. 869 00:42:14,920 --> 00:42:16,720 Speaker 2: I came here for the city life. I'm a writer. 870 00:42:17,239 --> 00:42:19,640 Speaker 2: I don't have anything. I was trained as a journalist, 871 00:42:19,840 --> 00:42:21,759 Speaker 2: like writing is what I do. And when we move 872 00:42:21,800 --> 00:42:24,239 Speaker 2: to the suburbs because you really wanted to. This was 873 00:42:24,280 --> 00:42:26,839 Speaker 2: twenty eighteen. We had our kids, and now I own 874 00:42:26,920 --> 00:42:29,920 Speaker 2: my own business. I'm like entrepreneur and I'm mom, and 875 00:42:29,960 --> 00:42:31,680 Speaker 2: I don't get to go to the city unless I 876 00:42:31,760 --> 00:42:34,120 Speaker 2: make something happen. So I've been trying to just like 877 00:42:34,239 --> 00:42:36,799 Speaker 2: make plans. I just relate to you so much the 878 00:42:36,840 --> 00:42:39,759 Speaker 2: way that you shamelessly, maybe even you have a little shame, 879 00:42:39,800 --> 00:42:43,399 Speaker 2: but you do it anyway. Pursue opportunities and networking. There's 880 00:42:43,400 --> 00:42:45,239 Speaker 2: a story you tell in the book about and I 881 00:42:45,520 --> 00:42:47,520 Speaker 2: also do career coachings on and You're gonna love this. Like, 882 00:42:47,719 --> 00:42:49,560 Speaker 2: I really don't think I'm a career coach. I'm like, 883 00:42:49,800 --> 00:42:51,839 Speaker 2: I'm like a get out there and talk to people coach, 884 00:42:52,000 --> 00:42:56,440 Speaker 2: because too many people, especially women, are too afraid to 885 00:42:56,640 --> 00:42:59,640 Speaker 2: actually get out and physically put themselves in a room 886 00:43:00,080 --> 00:43:03,000 Speaker 2: where they could potentially have something happen. You know, meet 887 00:43:03,040 --> 00:43:06,600 Speaker 2: someone hears something in passing, and you tell the story 888 00:43:06,640 --> 00:43:09,200 Speaker 2: of where did you go to this Beverly Hills like 889 00:43:09,360 --> 00:43:13,400 Speaker 2: networking event for diversity in Hollywood? Yeah, and you straight 890 00:43:13,480 --> 00:43:16,719 Speaker 2: up stock this dude, what was he just happened? You 891 00:43:16,880 --> 00:43:18,560 Speaker 2: just had emailed and you did the thing that I 892 00:43:18,600 --> 00:43:21,040 Speaker 2: always talk about, which is look up the list of attendees, 893 00:43:21,120 --> 00:43:24,440 Speaker 2: yes and email them before you go. And you did 894 00:43:24,480 --> 00:43:26,440 Speaker 2: the thing that everyone that I work with a lot 895 00:43:26,440 --> 00:43:28,040 Speaker 2: of them are afraid of, which is, well, what if 896 00:43:28,080 --> 00:43:31,560 Speaker 2: they think it's awkward or too pushy and like, well, 897 00:43:33,120 --> 00:43:34,440 Speaker 2: and they won't. 898 00:43:34,280 --> 00:43:37,480 Speaker 1: Respond do it? Everybody's an adult, right, Yeah? But I 899 00:43:37,560 --> 00:43:39,399 Speaker 1: just want to tell you I have been in your 900 00:43:39,440 --> 00:43:41,719 Speaker 1: shoes of not being able to go anywhere for a 901 00:43:41,760 --> 00:43:45,520 Speaker 1: long time, and now, thankfully in the digital space, there 902 00:43:45,560 --> 00:43:48,279 Speaker 1: are a lot of options. Like, for example, I'll give 903 00:43:48,280 --> 00:43:51,040 Speaker 1: you an example of how it worked out, and I 904 00:43:51,640 --> 00:43:54,840 Speaker 1: really took a shot in the dark. The CEO of Heartbeat, 905 00:43:55,080 --> 00:43:59,000 Speaker 1: Kevin Hart's company, which at the time I was so 906 00:43:59,120 --> 00:44:01,919 Speaker 1: new as a comic, barely doing open Minds, but he 907 00:44:02,080 --> 00:44:05,160 Speaker 1: was in a LinkedIn chat. I was just reading articles 908 00:44:05,160 --> 00:44:07,920 Speaker 1: about the comedy business blah blah. And because I was 909 00:44:07,960 --> 00:44:11,040 Speaker 1: reading about things in that space, LinkedIn feed was like 910 00:44:11,120 --> 00:44:15,480 Speaker 1: sending me all these articles about comedy business, comedy and entertainment, 911 00:44:15,520 --> 00:44:18,400 Speaker 1: comedy blah blah whatever, right, And one of the things 912 00:44:18,520 --> 00:44:21,280 Speaker 1: was like, Oh, the CEO of Heartbeat is like having 913 00:44:21,320 --> 00:44:24,600 Speaker 1: on some sort of LinkedIn zoom or something like he 914 00:44:24,760 --> 00:44:26,799 Speaker 1: was going to talk about the business of comedy and 915 00:44:26,840 --> 00:44:29,680 Speaker 1: you could attend for free just watch what he was saying. 916 00:44:29,800 --> 00:44:33,040 Speaker 1: And I remember thinking, oh, I should watch what are 917 00:44:33,040 --> 00:44:36,360 Speaker 1: they talking about? But then in the LinkedIn in the 918 00:44:36,440 --> 00:44:39,680 Speaker 1: zoom chat, there was an option to drop a question. 919 00:44:40,480 --> 00:44:42,680 Speaker 1: So I dropped a question and I saw that his 920 00:44:42,800 --> 00:44:46,120 Speaker 1: team was engaging with it, and I literally took that 921 00:44:46,200 --> 00:44:49,200 Speaker 1: and I ran with it. I kept dropping questions. I 922 00:44:49,280 --> 00:44:52,000 Speaker 1: kept dropping questions because I was like, Oh, somebody is 923 00:44:52,040 --> 00:44:55,319 Speaker 1: on the other side actually reading these, and I was like, 924 00:44:55,360 --> 00:44:57,200 Speaker 1: I'm a mom, I'm a there's there's no one else 925 00:44:57,320 --> 00:44:59,360 Speaker 1: like me. I just kept it, kept at it, and 926 00:44:59,400 --> 00:45:01,560 Speaker 1: then literally within a week I had a phone call 927 00:45:01,600 --> 00:45:01,960 Speaker 1: with him. 928 00:45:02,400 --> 00:45:04,080 Speaker 2: Is that how you got on the show? 929 00:45:04,520 --> 00:45:08,319 Speaker 1: No? No, he had nothing to do so the week. 930 00:45:08,440 --> 00:45:12,840 Speaker 1: Kevan's business is so big that the comedy is one side, 931 00:45:13,120 --> 00:45:15,839 Speaker 1: the movie and TV is one side. It's like all 932 00:45:15,880 --> 00:45:18,200 Speaker 1: different things. I thought that that's how I got it. Actually, 933 00:45:18,280 --> 00:45:21,080 Speaker 1: the people who were casting the show found me performing 934 00:45:21,120 --> 00:45:23,520 Speaker 1: in the subway and noticed me from a distance and 935 00:45:23,600 --> 00:45:25,520 Speaker 1: took my name down. Didn't say anything to me in 936 00:45:25,520 --> 00:45:27,800 Speaker 1: real life because I think they didn't want to engage 937 00:45:27,840 --> 00:45:29,439 Speaker 1: with me and be like, just in case she doesn't 938 00:45:29,480 --> 00:45:31,799 Speaker 1: get picked. But that's how they found me, and I 939 00:45:31,880 --> 00:45:36,560 Speaker 1: know that now. But besides, I didn't even know this 940 00:45:36,640 --> 00:45:39,000 Speaker 1: competition existed, so I didn't know what to even ask 941 00:45:39,080 --> 00:45:41,600 Speaker 1: for when I was connecting with the CEO. But at 942 00:45:41,640 --> 00:45:44,120 Speaker 1: the time, I remember getting a fifteen minute zoom with 943 00:45:44,160 --> 00:45:47,960 Speaker 1: him because I kept dming his team digitally and saying, hey, 944 00:45:47,960 --> 00:45:49,719 Speaker 1: I would love to talk to him. You know, there's 945 00:45:49,760 --> 00:45:52,399 Speaker 1: no one else. I thought I was throwing anything, and 946 00:45:52,520 --> 00:45:54,560 Speaker 1: they're like, all right, all right, all right, we'll see 947 00:45:54,560 --> 00:45:56,080 Speaker 1: what we can do. And I got a few minutes 948 00:45:56,160 --> 00:45:58,719 Speaker 1: zoom with him, and I remember saying to him, I 949 00:45:58,760 --> 00:46:01,680 Speaker 1: don't know what to even look At the time, I 950 00:46:01,760 --> 00:46:04,760 Speaker 1: was like doing literally like had just one step above 951 00:46:04,800 --> 00:46:07,319 Speaker 1: open mics. And all he said to me was he said, look, 952 00:46:07,360 --> 00:46:09,680 Speaker 1: I can't tell you what your journey needs to be 953 00:46:09,680 --> 00:46:11,640 Speaker 1: because I have no idea what you want to do 954 00:46:11,719 --> 00:46:14,160 Speaker 1: and what you can do. But the world needs more 955 00:46:14,239 --> 00:46:16,640 Speaker 1: voices like yours. So all I can tell you is 956 00:46:16,680 --> 00:46:18,839 Speaker 1: that you have to keep fighting until you figure out 957 00:46:18,880 --> 00:46:22,959 Speaker 1: your door. And even with that one statement from him 958 00:46:23,040 --> 00:46:26,120 Speaker 1: gave me so much encouragement, and knowing that I could 959 00:46:26,160 --> 00:46:28,840 Speaker 1: be face to face with somebody like him through a 960 00:46:28,920 --> 00:46:32,120 Speaker 1: LinkedIn platform, which is nothing like you know, we all 961 00:46:32,160 --> 00:46:36,040 Speaker 1: scroll and waste time on social media constantly. Now I'm 962 00:46:36,120 --> 00:46:39,200 Speaker 1: much more tooorical about it. I take shots all the time. 963 00:46:39,480 --> 00:46:43,440 Speaker 1: Most don't workout. Most famous people or powerful people are 964 00:46:43,480 --> 00:46:45,879 Speaker 1: not going to respond, and that's okay. I don't take 965 00:46:45,880 --> 00:46:49,000 Speaker 1: it personally. And that's another thing women have to learn. 966 00:46:49,280 --> 00:46:51,440 Speaker 1: They'll be like, oh, I did this, and then no 967 00:46:51,480 --> 00:46:53,279 Speaker 1: one wrote back to me and they all hate me, 968 00:46:53,320 --> 00:46:55,880 Speaker 1: and like, you got to stop saying all that. Everybody's 969 00:46:55,920 --> 00:46:59,520 Speaker 1: got their own going on. And that's okay, fail fast. 970 00:46:59,520 --> 00:47:01,719 Speaker 2: It's one of the things that you talk about and 971 00:47:01,760 --> 00:47:04,160 Speaker 2: I love about you and what I try to also emulate, 972 00:47:04,160 --> 00:47:06,239 Speaker 2: even though it's a bit harder to do at least 973 00:47:06,280 --> 00:47:09,040 Speaker 2: where I'm at right now, is like getting like failing 974 00:47:09,080 --> 00:47:11,319 Speaker 2: so quickly that you don't even like dwell on it. 975 00:47:11,680 --> 00:47:14,120 Speaker 2: You're just you're already on to the next attempt, you 976 00:47:14,200 --> 00:47:16,600 Speaker 2: know what I mean, like the next email, the next guest, 977 00:47:16,680 --> 00:47:19,640 Speaker 2: I mean booking this, you know, booking guests on this podcast. 978 00:47:19,640 --> 00:47:21,319 Speaker 2: I've been doing it for years and years, and still 979 00:47:21,360 --> 00:47:23,480 Speaker 2: I'm just like, sometimes I feel like I need to 980 00:47:23,680 --> 00:47:26,080 Speaker 2: low key stock to get although I didn't have to 981 00:47:26,080 --> 00:47:28,839 Speaker 2: low key stock you. I just had to find your 982 00:47:28,840 --> 00:47:32,400 Speaker 2: book publisher, Thank the Lord, and that it can be. 983 00:47:32,480 --> 00:47:35,080 Speaker 2: It can feel as It's just funny because you know, 984 00:47:35,200 --> 00:47:37,239 Speaker 2: American women, we have this perception, I think on the 985 00:47:37,239 --> 00:47:39,360 Speaker 2: outside world that we're go getters and we're loud, and 986 00:47:39,360 --> 00:47:41,799 Speaker 2: we burn our bras and we just like get what 987 00:47:41,840 --> 00:47:44,160 Speaker 2: we want all the time. But there are a lot 988 00:47:44,200 --> 00:47:47,879 Speaker 2: of us who have this like internalized patriarchy and misogyny 989 00:47:48,000 --> 00:47:52,120 Speaker 2: and the self doubt that stops us from using our voice. 990 00:47:52,160 --> 00:47:54,359 Speaker 2: And maybe we're in that LinkedIn chat or zoom chat, 991 00:47:54,360 --> 00:47:57,040 Speaker 2: but we're not actually saying anything or thinking we have 992 00:47:57,120 --> 00:47:58,160 Speaker 2: something worth asking. 993 00:47:58,800 --> 00:48:02,600 Speaker 1: Yep, that can hold us back. That's all valid self doubt, right, 994 00:48:02,600 --> 00:48:05,960 Speaker 1: we all have it, but you have to push through it. 995 00:48:06,120 --> 00:48:08,200 Speaker 1: And the thing that I learned is that even like 996 00:48:08,440 --> 00:48:12,120 Speaker 1: very fancy looking successful people, like people who look like 997 00:48:12,120 --> 00:48:14,600 Speaker 1: they have it all figured out, they all have self doubt. 998 00:48:14,719 --> 00:48:16,600 Speaker 1: I know that now because I hang out in green 999 00:48:16,640 --> 00:48:19,520 Speaker 1: rooms with them sometimes, and they all have to push 1000 00:48:19,560 --> 00:48:23,000 Speaker 1: through it. Like you know, I've beat myself up for years. 1001 00:48:23,280 --> 00:48:27,120 Speaker 1: For years I've said to myself, woe is me? I'm short, 1002 00:48:27,440 --> 00:48:30,800 Speaker 1: I like eating carbs. You know, all these other people 1003 00:48:30,920 --> 00:48:34,360 Speaker 1: are tall and thin naturally, and they naturally like eating 1004 00:48:34,400 --> 00:48:38,080 Speaker 1: whatever the protein mumbo jumbo is. And I have now 1005 00:48:38,160 --> 00:48:42,000 Speaker 1: hung out with movie stars who like literally are struggling. 1006 00:48:42,440 --> 00:48:45,279 Speaker 1: They're clenching their teeth. You look at them and you're like, 1007 00:48:45,400 --> 00:48:48,840 Speaker 1: you're struggling with this, really, like you want that piece 1008 00:48:48,880 --> 00:48:51,759 Speaker 1: of pizza and you're resisting it. Because I thought I 1009 00:48:51,880 --> 00:48:54,640 Speaker 1: was the only one. I was like everybody else just 1010 00:48:54,719 --> 00:48:58,879 Speaker 1: naturally wants the Greek yogurt. It's me and it's not 1011 00:48:59,000 --> 00:49:02,279 Speaker 1: like everybody's or their own struggle, Like I've hung out 1012 00:49:02,320 --> 00:49:05,359 Speaker 1: with movie stars where they're like, I haven't eaten a 1013 00:49:05,400 --> 00:49:08,840 Speaker 1: carb in twenty years, for real, because I just can't. 1014 00:49:08,880 --> 00:49:10,960 Speaker 1: If I eat one, I'm gonna want the whole thing 1015 00:49:11,000 --> 00:49:14,480 Speaker 1: all over again. And you learn that everybody is struggling 1016 00:49:14,640 --> 00:49:17,560 Speaker 1: their own struggles. It's real, and that helps you not 1017 00:49:17,719 --> 00:49:22,200 Speaker 1: take everything so seriously, you know, and so personally you 1018 00:49:22,320 --> 00:49:24,200 Speaker 1: take a shot and if it doesn't work out, you 1019 00:49:24,280 --> 00:49:27,040 Speaker 1: move on, you know, maybe discipline yourself like I there 1020 00:49:27,160 --> 00:49:29,759 Speaker 1: was a period of time where I used to be like, 1021 00:49:29,840 --> 00:49:32,239 Speaker 1: for forty five minutes of the day, I'm going to 1022 00:49:32,320 --> 00:49:35,879 Speaker 1: reach out to people somehow, whether it will be INSTEADM 1023 00:49:36,120 --> 00:49:39,920 Speaker 1: or LinkedIn. I'm gonna read other people's things and actively 1024 00:49:40,000 --> 00:49:43,680 Speaker 1: engage in their world because like a lot of people 1025 00:49:43,719 --> 00:49:46,480 Speaker 1: on social media will have their accounts, they will have 1026 00:49:46,520 --> 00:49:49,400 Speaker 1: their tweets in their posts, but they wait for people 1027 00:49:49,400 --> 00:49:51,600 Speaker 1: to come to them. But the way to actually build 1028 00:49:51,719 --> 00:49:54,719 Speaker 1: is to go out there and engage in other people's 1029 00:49:55,280 --> 00:49:57,399 Speaker 1: like in your case, I'll give you an example. I'm 1030 00:49:57,400 --> 00:50:02,040 Speaker 1: doing so many podcasts, but you posting install stories about 1031 00:50:02,120 --> 00:50:04,880 Speaker 1: what you liked in my world, you know, you are 1032 00:50:04,920 --> 00:50:08,920 Speaker 1: showing me that you're actually doing your homework, You're finding 1033 00:50:08,960 --> 00:50:11,960 Speaker 1: things relevant that I work so hard to build for 1034 00:50:12,080 --> 00:50:16,439 Speaker 1: readers that that puts you on the fast track to like, yes, 1035 00:50:16,560 --> 00:50:18,799 Speaker 1: I want to talk to this lady. I want to 1036 00:50:18,840 --> 00:50:21,879 Speaker 1: do our podcast immediately. You know what I mean. But 1037 00:50:22,200 --> 00:50:24,520 Speaker 1: we all have to do some version of that in 1038 00:50:24,560 --> 00:50:27,160 Speaker 1: our life. Is deliver value to other people so that 1039 00:50:27,200 --> 00:50:30,759 Speaker 1: they are inspired to engage with us, that they feel like, yes, 1040 00:50:31,040 --> 00:50:33,480 Speaker 1: this is a person who's done a little bit of homework, 1041 00:50:33,800 --> 00:50:36,439 Speaker 1: cares to know about me, and how can I help them? 1042 00:50:36,520 --> 00:50:38,640 Speaker 1: And then we build this cycle of help. 1043 00:50:39,440 --> 00:50:41,399 Speaker 2: Well, you also told me crying on the internet would 1044 00:50:41,400 --> 00:50:43,520 Speaker 2: go viral, but it didn't. So I just wonder when 1045 00:50:43,560 --> 00:50:43,920 Speaker 2: you got to. 1046 00:50:43,960 --> 00:50:48,960 Speaker 1: Keep doing it, do more. I'm there are unlimited tears 1047 00:50:49,040 --> 00:50:49,359 Speaker 1: in there. 1048 00:50:51,280 --> 00:50:53,520 Speaker 2: Not every book is like yours. Can I just say 1049 00:50:53,680 --> 00:50:55,440 Speaker 2: for my audience, you may not think, I mean, I'm 1050 00:50:55,480 --> 00:50:58,120 Speaker 2: an African American woman, what are our stories have in common? 1051 00:50:58,160 --> 00:51:00,880 Speaker 2: But there was an anecdote in your book where for 1052 00:51:00,960 --> 00:51:05,040 Speaker 2: your wedding you were almost tricked into getting your whole 1053 00:51:05,040 --> 00:51:08,080 Speaker 2: body bleached and like being slathered in some kind of 1054 00:51:08,160 --> 00:51:11,480 Speaker 2: chemical cream. Oh, and also in that anecdote you're trying 1055 00:51:11,480 --> 00:51:13,719 Speaker 2: to figure out why am I not leaving? Why am 1056 00:51:13,760 --> 00:51:14,719 Speaker 2: I enduring this? 1057 00:51:15,239 --> 00:51:15,839 Speaker 1: Because it was. 1058 00:51:15,800 --> 00:51:18,640 Speaker 2: Hours, right hours? And I just wanted you to know 1059 00:51:18,640 --> 00:51:22,280 Speaker 2: how seen I felt. Because black women in America we straight, 1060 00:51:22,320 --> 00:51:25,680 Speaker 2: we get we're grown up, often getting the chemical relaxers 1061 00:51:25,719 --> 00:51:29,239 Speaker 2: on our head, and I, as a kid, I would 1062 00:51:29,280 --> 00:51:32,839 Speaker 2: be burned alive like and I would be bloody and 1063 00:51:32,960 --> 00:51:35,600 Speaker 2: have my hair stuck to my scalp afterward, and it 1064 00:51:35,640 --> 00:51:38,000 Speaker 2: went on until my twenties, and you just you just 1065 00:51:38,080 --> 00:51:40,400 Speaker 2: go through it and you're like, is this normal to 1066 00:51:40,520 --> 00:51:43,279 Speaker 2: be in so so much pain and bleeding? And like 1067 00:51:43,360 --> 00:51:46,759 Speaker 2: it must be because they're charging me for it. And 1068 00:51:46,840 --> 00:51:49,080 Speaker 2: I just I felt really seen by that, and I 1069 00:51:49,120 --> 00:51:53,040 Speaker 2: can there is something psychologically that happens when people are 1070 00:51:53,400 --> 00:51:56,400 Speaker 2: inflicting pain on you for like a beauty standard that 1071 00:51:56,600 --> 00:51:57,800 Speaker 2: just we just freeze. 1072 00:51:58,400 --> 00:52:01,839 Speaker 1: We all did it. We still it's crazy. Oh my god. 1073 00:52:01,880 --> 00:52:04,840 Speaker 1: When I was reliving that moment and writing that chapter, 1074 00:52:05,680 --> 00:52:08,120 Speaker 1: I was like, did it not occur to me that 1075 00:52:08,160 --> 00:52:11,680 Speaker 1: I could just be like stop this, I'm out? But 1076 00:52:11,840 --> 00:52:14,320 Speaker 1: instead I was like, yeah, bleach every corner. 1077 00:52:16,440 --> 00:52:18,400 Speaker 2: I don't know about that, but that was I was like, 1078 00:52:18,640 --> 00:52:20,279 Speaker 2: even on my own scalps, I don't know how you 1079 00:52:20,880 --> 00:52:23,319 Speaker 2: endure that, Sara, and I want to be respectful of 1080 00:52:23,320 --> 00:52:26,759 Speaker 2: your time. I know you're so busy. Thank you a 1081 00:52:26,840 --> 00:52:30,239 Speaker 2: million times over for saying yes and for letting me. 1082 00:52:30,520 --> 00:52:32,120 Speaker 2: It's really rare. I don't take it for granted that 1083 00:52:32,160 --> 00:52:33,480 Speaker 2: I get to look someone in the eyes and say, 1084 00:52:33,520 --> 00:52:36,719 Speaker 2: your work really impacted me, and I'll carry it with me. 1085 00:52:36,920 --> 00:52:40,160 Speaker 2: And as someone who doesn't like fully yet call themselves 1086 00:52:40,200 --> 00:52:43,160 Speaker 2: an author, you wrote every word of this book, and 1087 00:52:43,440 --> 00:52:46,080 Speaker 2: I myself, I am writing my own book right now. 1088 00:52:46,120 --> 00:52:47,440 Speaker 2: I just submitted the manuscript. 1089 00:52:47,520 --> 00:52:50,160 Speaker 1: Thank you. Yeah, that's a big journey. That is such 1090 00:52:50,200 --> 00:52:50,919 Speaker 1: a hard job. 1091 00:52:51,800 --> 00:52:55,399 Speaker 2: People kept telling me to get a ghost writer, and 1092 00:52:55,600 --> 00:52:57,920 Speaker 2: I you tried, right, Yeah. 1093 00:52:57,600 --> 00:53:00,759 Speaker 1: It was so bad. I mean I wasn't able to 1094 00:53:00,760 --> 00:53:03,319 Speaker 1: do it. Maybe somebody else can show a better way. 1095 00:53:03,320 --> 00:53:04,040 Speaker 1: But it didn't work. 1096 00:53:04,719 --> 00:53:06,759 Speaker 2: It was just it became for me. I thought I 1097 00:53:06,800 --> 00:53:09,319 Speaker 2: was going to write a personal finance career book. It 1098 00:53:09,360 --> 00:53:13,360 Speaker 2: became stories, it became personal and I'm like, there's just 1099 00:53:13,440 --> 00:53:14,799 Speaker 2: no way that's what I want. 1100 00:53:14,880 --> 00:53:17,040 Speaker 1: I want to read that book, Like, I don't want 1101 00:53:17,080 --> 00:53:20,680 Speaker 1: somebody's ghost written version. I want your words. And you know, 1102 00:53:20,760 --> 00:53:23,480 Speaker 1: like now I know how you speak, I know who 1103 00:53:23,520 --> 00:53:25,920 Speaker 1: your Cadence. I know how your mind is working. I 1104 00:53:26,520 --> 00:53:28,880 Speaker 1: want more of this, So I hope that you just 1105 00:53:29,000 --> 00:53:32,560 Speaker 1: write the story like I wrote my book, as if 1106 00:53:32,600 --> 00:53:35,200 Speaker 1: I'm talking to a friend, and hope that it's being 1107 00:53:35,200 --> 00:53:38,440 Speaker 1: received that way, because I don't think anybody needs like 1108 00:53:38,520 --> 00:53:41,520 Speaker 1: a book from me that sounds like some deep thinking 1109 00:53:41,520 --> 00:53:44,560 Speaker 1: philosopher wrote it, and it wouldn't be right. You know, 1110 00:53:44,600 --> 00:53:47,719 Speaker 1: I'm a TikToker, So I think I really applaud you 1111 00:53:47,760 --> 00:53:50,240 Speaker 1: that you've submitted a manuscript that's so hard. 1112 00:53:50,920 --> 00:53:55,320 Speaker 2: Two years, baby, much work and pages and page and 1113 00:53:55,560 --> 00:53:56,640 Speaker 2: and oh my god. 1114 00:53:56,680 --> 00:53:58,480 Speaker 1: When you think you're done, you're never done. 1115 00:53:58,800 --> 00:54:00,400 Speaker 2: Oh I know I'm not done either. 1116 00:54:00,520 --> 00:54:03,720 Speaker 1: Round of cedits and another polish and another Oh my god. 1117 00:54:04,200 --> 00:54:06,799 Speaker 1: So congrats to you, and really congrats to you for 1118 00:54:06,960 --> 00:54:09,239 Speaker 1: using the time that you have at home where you're 1119 00:54:09,239 --> 00:54:12,040 Speaker 1: restricted by so many things because you have little kids. 1120 00:54:12,360 --> 00:54:14,840 Speaker 1: You're an example of how to make the best of 1121 00:54:14,920 --> 00:54:18,000 Speaker 1: what you have and to put yourself in a position 1122 00:54:18,160 --> 00:54:21,040 Speaker 1: that once the kids get out, you can really take 1123 00:54:21,080 --> 00:54:24,600 Speaker 1: off from that landing point. It's just great. I love it. 1124 00:54:25,160 --> 00:54:28,120 Speaker 2: Thank you so much for that encouragement, not that I 1125 00:54:28,120 --> 00:54:29,719 Speaker 2: mean I feel like you've given us so much. You 1126 00:54:29,719 --> 00:54:32,680 Speaker 2: don't owe me anything, but everything is in the book 1127 00:54:32,719 --> 00:54:35,040 Speaker 2: and I just yeah, I just appreciate all that you 1128 00:54:35,080 --> 00:54:38,640 Speaker 2: stand for. Everybody, please go buy a copy of Zarna's 1129 00:54:38,680 --> 00:54:41,160 Speaker 2: incredible book. You got to get the audible because there's 1130 00:54:41,200 --> 00:54:44,200 Speaker 2: bonus essays. Your daughter's essay. Oh damn, we didn't even 1131 00:54:44,239 --> 00:54:49,120 Speaker 2: get into your kids. They're incredible. They're incredible. And check 1132 00:54:49,120 --> 00:54:53,719 Speaker 2: out your podcast, Zarnagarg's Family Podcast. Yeah, I love it. 1133 00:54:53,719 --> 00:54:56,400 Speaker 2: It's very you know, a unique name. You really like, 1134 00:54:56,440 --> 00:54:57,600 Speaker 2: went outside the box with that. 1135 00:54:57,760 --> 00:54:59,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, we're really deep thinking involved. 1136 00:55:00,080 --> 00:55:03,759 Speaker 2: Yeah, but I hope this won't be our last chat. 1137 00:55:03,800 --> 00:55:05,400 Speaker 2: I hope that we'll get to chat again soon, so 1138 00:55:05,440 --> 00:55:08,000 Speaker 2: I won't try to get everything in there. Bazarrena guard 1139 00:55:08,200 --> 00:55:11,239 Speaker 2: appreciate you. You embody, brown ambition, and we're just so 1140 00:55:11,320 --> 00:55:12,239 Speaker 2: proud to have you here. 1141 00:55:12,960 --> 00:55:15,520 Speaker 1: Thank you so much for having me. I'm so honored. 1142 00:55:15,600 --> 00:55:18,560 Speaker 1: I love being on this podcast. I wish every listener 1143 00:55:18,600 --> 00:55:21,759 Speaker 1: and viewer of yours great success. And for those who 1144 00:55:21,800 --> 00:55:24,759 Speaker 1: are feeling stuck, I hope they feel unstuck when they 1145 00:55:24,760 --> 00:55:27,640 Speaker 1: read IF and when they read my book. A big 1146 00:55:27,719 --> 00:55:30,040 Speaker 1: reason I decided to write the book when I did 1147 00:55:30,160 --> 00:55:33,360 Speaker 1: prioritize it over everything else is precisely for that reason. 1148 00:55:33,400 --> 00:55:35,640 Speaker 1: So I get asked all the time, what can I do? 1149 00:55:35,719 --> 00:55:38,399 Speaker 1: I feel so stuck, and I try to give them 1150 00:55:38,400 --> 00:55:42,600 Speaker 1: the most honest, authentic solutions that I used in my 1151 00:55:42,640 --> 00:55:44,799 Speaker 1: own life, and I really hope that one of them 1152 00:55:44,840 --> 00:55:47,680 Speaker 1: works for them and helps them get unstuck. But thank 1153 00:55:47,719 --> 00:55:50,719 Speaker 1: you for having me. You're so wonderful and I have 1154 00:55:50,760 --> 00:55:53,680 Speaker 1: so much love for everybody in this universe. Thank you. 1155 00:55:53,880 --> 00:55:55,440 Speaker 2: And I'll leave you, guys with one of my favorite 1156 00:55:55,480 --> 00:55:58,080 Speaker 2: quotes from your book. Okay, well two of them, but 1157 00:55:58,160 --> 00:55:59,799 Speaker 2: this one in particular is if you want to be 1158 00:55:59,800 --> 00:56:02,759 Speaker 2: an entrepreneurs, start saying to yourself, I'm going to do 1159 00:56:02,840 --> 00:56:05,680 Speaker 2: this no matter what every day. I Am going to 1160 00:56:05,719 --> 00:56:07,839 Speaker 2: do this no matter what every day. Because there are 1161 00:56:07,840 --> 00:56:10,200 Speaker 2: so many challenges, we've got to keep that mantra going. 1162 00:56:11,040 --> 00:56:13,960 Speaker 2: Thank you, thank you all right, b I fam Until 1163 00:56:14,000 --> 00:56:17,680 Speaker 2: next time, Bye bye