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Speaker 1: Hey, kid, misconnections. That was me staring.

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Speaker 2: It's only two places to find true love in this world.

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Speaker 2: One is at pet Smart when you demonstrate to the

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Speaker 2: cashier how you can also catch a flying tennis ball

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Speaker 2: in your mouth.

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Speaker 1: That's impressive job, And the others on the pages of

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Speaker 1: craigslist dot org.

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Speaker 2: We scour that website every week to find the best

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Speaker 2: misconnections that they have to offer, like this first one

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Speaker 2: titled onion Volcano heart eruption. Oh woman for man thirty

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Speaker 2: one Hibachi restaurant, She says to the Hibachi chef, who

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Speaker 2: made my dinner way more interesting than my date?

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Speaker 1: Oh, I see you. That is a risk you take

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Speaker 1: taking anybody to one of those restaurants. The show is fun.

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Speaker 1: They're talented, she says.

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Speaker 2: I was the long haired brunette sitting at the table

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Speaker 2: with my boring date, dan em Dan's a boring name too.

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Speaker 1: Sorry.

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Speaker 2: Did you notice he ordered chicken because he doesn't like seafood?

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Speaker 1: Had flag much.

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Speaker 2: I'm sorry you had to deal with that guy in

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Speaker 2: his juvenile palate. I don't think I need to say it,

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Speaker 2: but you were a legend that night when you tossed

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Speaker 2: the egg up in the air. I thought for sure

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Speaker 2: you'd crack it with your knife, and instead you caught

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Speaker 2: it between your lips and swallowed it whole.

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Speaker 1: Wait.

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Speaker 2: Wow, actually been reading the room right, maybe the ways

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Speaker 2: and he didn't break eye contact.

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Speaker 1: How do you diget that? Ten minutes later you made

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Speaker 1: it reappear? Wait? How I looked over it Dan to.

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Speaker 2: See how he'd react to your greatness, but he was

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Speaker 2: too busy using his chopsticks trying to make his chicken walk.

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Speaker 1: At one point, I was.

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Speaker 2: So humiliated when Dan told you that the only fish

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Speaker 2: he eats is the fileo kind. I almosto left right there,

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Speaker 2: but I was on date with him, so I didn't

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Speaker 2: have the opportunity to give you my number.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's rude.

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Speaker 2: Instead, I tried to spell it out with grains of

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Speaker 2: rice on my plate.

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Speaker 1: So difficulty did you see it?

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Speaker 2: If you didn't reply back to this message and tell

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Speaker 2: me what crude joke Dan made.

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Speaker 1: About your onion volcano?

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Speaker 2: Oh no, Dan, I don't know what he could have

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Speaker 2: possibly said. I like that she has a way to

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Speaker 2: know it's that Hibachi chef and not a different one that.

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Speaker 1: That was signed Alyssa. This next misconnection is titled Ladled

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Speaker 1: for Love there's a lot of food love today.

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Speaker 2: A man for woman thirty seven soup kitchen. He says,

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Speaker 2: you long brown hair, Martha Stewart like dimples, and a

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Speaker 2: used apron that looks like someone got sick on it.

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Speaker 1: I'm assuming that was just the split p oh. I

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Speaker 1: don't know that checks out though.

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Speaker 2: I don't see you around the mission much, but you're cute.

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Speaker 2: I attempted to get your attention when I yelled, are

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Speaker 2: you seriously out of clam chowder? You apologized and talked

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Speaker 2: to a supervisor. A few minutes later, you brought me

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Speaker 2: a cup of chicken noodle. It's nice. Wasn't what I

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Speaker 2: asked for it, but beggars can't be choosers, especially in

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Speaker 2: a soup kitchen. In reality, I probably don't deserve soup

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Speaker 2: at all.

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Speaker 1: I actually make over a million dollars a year.

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Speaker 2: That's not real. I just come here for the free

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Speaker 2: meal once a week. I actually owned several properties across

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Speaker 2: the city and only do this to get the thrill

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Speaker 2: of taking advantage of the system. Oh go.

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Speaker 1: To Bill Gates.

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Speaker 2: I used to get my adrenaline fixed by parking in

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Speaker 2: disabled parking spots, but once the police got defunded. They

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Speaker 2: stopped checking on me, and that just wasn't fun anymore funny. Anyway,

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Speaker 2: if you see this, I'll be back next Wednesday night.

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Speaker 2: We can meet in the bathroom at seven. I'll bring

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Speaker 2: two straws, You bring the split pee.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, this damn.

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Speaker 2: Like it goes to take advantage of the system and

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Speaker 2: then complains about the system. Where's could be damn because

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Speaker 2: it is on mister d oh right else. This next

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Speaker 2: misconnection is titled my whistle is wet woman for man

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Speaker 2: thirty seven outside ross dress for less you sexy man

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Speaker 2: in gray sweats, ethnically white, albino samoan, just a guess, I.

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Speaker 1: Just don't ever guess. Don't Why am I.

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Speaker 2: Picturing the rock but with Mark Zuckerberg's face, It says

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Speaker 2: me middle aged but not middle aged looking?

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Speaker 1: Do you think that? Yeah? Wearing all black.

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Speaker 2: All velcrow, all wrapped up in hello kitty bandages, trendy

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Speaker 2: winky face.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: All we crossed paths before you entered the store and

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Speaker 2: you glanced over, thinking I was whistling at you. I

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Speaker 2: told you it was for the birds, even though it

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Speaker 2: was nighttime.

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Speaker 1: Second winkie things. This woman is so scary.

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Speaker 2: I didn't want it to look strange and follow you in,

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Speaker 2: so I counted to five Mississippi, and then I snuck

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Speaker 2: behind an old lady bringing in a suitcase, A shoplifting lady.

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Speaker 1: Why is you bringing in a suite? The signs lately

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Speaker 1: no backpacks or suitcases.

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Speaker 2: For the next few minutes, I skittered across each aisle,

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Speaker 2: hiding successfully from each foreboding glance, until over the loud

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Speaker 2: speakers the song ain't no MoU.

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Speaker 1: And high enough It's a sign.

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Speaker 2: At that moment, my body began moving intrinsically, arms flailing,

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Speaker 2: legs scissoring, Velcrow ripping. As the song came to a close,

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Speaker 2: I slumped to the floor like a wilted butterfly and

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Speaker 2: waited for you to pick me up with your large

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Speaker 2: samoan albino white hands.

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Speaker 1: I can't ain't no rimber wide enough.

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Speaker 2: Then you left. Maybe I'm too much for you, or

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Speaker 2: maybe I'm not enough. Well, let's chat with my therapist

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Speaker 2: about it. First session on me. It signed healed and

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Speaker 2: ready for my next chapter. Velcrow Virginia.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and Ross dressed for us too. Apparently those were your.

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Speaker 2: Craigslist misconnections for the week. We got your phone tap

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Speaker 2: coming up in just a few minutes.

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Speaker 1: Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning,