Speaker 1: Welcome to the tap out on messy Intercom.
Speaker 2: Happy Holidays, Happy Holidays. The Liberals ruined Christmas. The liberals
Speaker 2: ruined Christmas.
Speaker 1: They literally did. We went to Target before this to
Speaker 1: get like decorations and the minimalism throw up that was
Speaker 1: all over that Target.
Speaker 2: Was really released far too much. Our children are going
Speaker 2: to grow up green back, red and green Christmas. Yeah,
Speaker 2: what happened? Gray and beige and white? Like I've had
Speaker 2: a fucking up a.
Speaker 1: Beige Christmas, have a beige Christmas. Everything was like woody
Speaker 1: and gray and nasty.
Speaker 2: And I saw this like garland that was like like
Speaker 2: supposed to be like hung up on the walls and
Speaker 2: ship and it was just wooden balls and like I
Speaker 2: almost threw up. It's supposed to be like rainbow ornaments.
Speaker 1: Okay, well, because you know who took the rainbows from us,
Speaker 1: so we don't get to use that anymore. They have
Speaker 1: to save all their rainbow paint for July or is
Speaker 1: it June?
Speaker 2: June?
Speaker 1: You wouldn't know, okay, you would wow. If you're wondering
Speaker 1: why Drew looks like that, it's because he doesn't know
Speaker 1: how to wear that.
Speaker 2: I grew my beard out.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and we bleached it with splat, so it's never
Speaker 1: going back to normal ever.
Speaker 2: Again, it's supposed to Is my nose supposed to be covered?
Speaker 1: No, you're not supposed to be covered with the fucking mustach.
Speaker 2: When you took that picture earlier, I was like, why
Speaker 2: does it look like shit? And it's because it's like
Speaker 2: all the way up to my eyes.
Speaker 1: It is like the cheapest thing I think I've ever
Speaker 1: seen on the planet. You should just gorilla glue it
Speaker 1: like that girl did with her wig. Oh yeah, and
Speaker 1: then you won't have to worry about it slipping and sliding.
Speaker 2: We were talking with Rain, Thank you Rain for letting
Speaker 2: us use your house.
Speaker 1: It's because our kitchen corner is scared.
Speaker 2: Rain shot Rain. But we were talking about like the
Speaker 2: girl that gorilla glued her hair down like and Rain
Speaker 2: was like, bro, like, how did she think this was
Speaker 2: the gorilla snot? Like it literally looks like fucking glue.
Speaker 1: Also, it's like burns, like anytime you get super glue
Speaker 1: or something on your skin, you have like a chemical reaction.
Speaker 1: It literally like start to like.
Speaker 2: Right here is there?
Speaker 3: What?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 2: I thought this was a cat whisker.
Speaker 1: She doesn't have a cat.
Speaker 2: I thought it was left here from the past. People
Speaker 2: are fell Yes, I've been keeping as those whiskers.
Speaker 1: Really, I've never seen his whiskers.
Speaker 2: I found three and two in the last two days.
Speaker 2: He's stressed, he's losing his grip.
Speaker 1: Why is whiskers falling out? But yeah, how did she
Speaker 1: not know? Because like anytime I've gotten super glue where
Speaker 1: my fingers, it burns, like it literally burned so fucking bad,
Speaker 1: Like are like animal bodies know immediately that that shouldn't
Speaker 1: be on our skin. So how did she like put
Speaker 1: it all over her forehead?
Speaker 2: I literally was gluing together like a failed three D print,
Speaker 2: Like I was trying to like piece it back together.
Speaker 2: Oh wait, we literally showed it in the last episode.
Speaker 2: I was trying to glue the arm back onto that
Speaker 2: print and let me take this shit off because it's
Speaker 2: like actually itching my nose. It's like it's straight up
Speaker 2: as beestos, Like it's fucked up.
Speaker 1: It's dry wall, it's the thing you fill walls with.
Speaker 1: It's fiberglass. You had to take up your fiberglass.
Speaker 2: But I was like gluing the arm back on that
Speaker 2: figurine and like I dripped like fucking five or six
Speaker 2: drips of the super glue onto my middle finger and
Speaker 2: ring finger, and it literally started smoking, and I thought,
Speaker 2: like just I didn't think anything of it, but then
Speaker 2: like I like tried to wipe it off really quick
Speaker 2: because I was like, I've had super glue on my fingers.
Speaker 2: It's not that deep. I used to glue my fingers
Speaker 2: together and pull them apart because it like felt good,
Speaker 2: Like that is like no normal, I know someone has Yeah,
Speaker 2: that's that's or something.
Speaker 1: But he said he did super glue.
Speaker 2: It was fun. It's fun, Like it doesn't that's dangerous.
Speaker 2: God they are y'all are now officially the OP.
Speaker 1: Like y'all are now officially bestowed as the OP.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but I didn't think anything of it. But gorilla
Speaker 2: glue started smoking, like and it literally like it was
Speaker 2: like almost like a smoke ring. It like like it
Speaker 2: blew up and smoked up, and I was like, oh wow,
Speaker 2: like I'm literally gonna die. And then I just had
Speaker 2: like superglue fingers for like three days. But I read
Speaker 2: online just like keep it moisturized, and you know, I
Speaker 2: keep that ship moisturized, Like no, I used your Bibrito
Speaker 2: rose hand.
Speaker 1: Cur the oiliest creamy planet. I do, but I like
Speaker 1: have this problem with like all my because my like
Speaker 1: skin is so dry, I usually only put it like
Speaker 1: on my arms and hands, as the rest of my
Speaker 1: body absorbs cream so fast that like I would need
Speaker 1: to go through that whole fucking tube to moisturize my body.
Speaker 1: And then I'm like, I get to smell good for
Speaker 1: one night and one night only.
Speaker 3: You know who else's body absorbs cream really fast?
Speaker 1: Yours, because you're ran through and you'll everybody like I
Speaker 1: was sitting on you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he was sitting on the couch earlier talking about
Speaker 2: how he can easily fit a tennis ball up his butthole.
Speaker 2: He can just sit on it.
Speaker 1: You know how some people are like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: Like I don't want anybody to want me because like
Speaker 1: the mix of water and like is really grow snassy.
Speaker 1: Kai literally is always like that doesn't matter because it
Speaker 1: just seeps in. It's like he's like a sham wow only.
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, this is a Christmas episode.
Speaker 1: We can believe that we can bleep, that we can
Speaker 1: bleep that you'll better be watching this on the living
Speaker 1: room TV with your whole family around you.
Speaker 2: Oh literally, I bet there is a family out there
Speaker 2: that listens together.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but that's the same that and like the two
Speaker 1: thousands would do a wife swap and they were like
Speaker 1: the hippies, do you know what I mean? Like, yeah,
Speaker 1: they were like, we believe even peace. Now we're those
Speaker 1: families in take away.
Speaker 2: We love you media. But did y'all Okay, I have
Speaker 2: to go back to this because I was like, I
Speaker 2: wanted to talk about it, but we got sidetracked. But
Speaker 2: did y'all ever do this? And I'm being dead fucking serious.
Speaker 2: I'm not even like making this a bit like this
Speaker 2: is something I used to do. But I would sit
Speaker 2: on the stairs at my house and I would grab
Speaker 2: like a needle and stick it under the first layer
Speaker 2: of skin. Okay, good because yeah, and then I would like,
Speaker 2: I think.
Speaker 1: Every kid did that once they realized they have like
Speaker 1: eight million layers of skin. But then every time you
Speaker 1: pinched yourself and it fucking her, you were like, and
Speaker 1: then you would just leave it a lot like you
Speaker 1: would again you.
Speaker 2: Make like a little blood blister under there.
Speaker 1: Okay, and then you would bite the blood blister.
Speaker 2: No I never did that.
Speaker 1: I did that.
Speaker 3: Hell no, I would do that. I would make it bust.
Speaker 1: Okay, well keep going because he's getting really weird. We've
Speaker 1: let him get away with too much already this episode.
Speaker 1: So being uncomfortable Drew, you've upset him.
Speaker 3: Drew was seeing like figures before the episode started.
Speaker 2: I don't think that was a real person. I think
Speaker 2: it literally was like probably you came.
Speaker 1: Over to us while we were all sitting at a
Speaker 1: box eating because Rain like just got her crib. So
Speaker 1: it's actually so cute. It's like in the beginning stages
Speaker 1: where you're like eating on top of boxes so you're
Speaker 1: not like hurting your back, And we were all sitting
Speaker 1: watching tiktoks and Drew came over there there was someone
Speaker 1: outside there were they took a picture and that they left.
Speaker 3: And like I was talking, his face went white.
Speaker 2: I swear the ghost.
Speaker 1: Well, it's because his hypoxia. He's not the twikest he's
Speaker 1: ever been with his brain.
Speaker 2: It's literally it's from the three D printer gases that
Speaker 2: are like fucking my ship.
Speaker 1: You're still sleeping in my bed.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, we we're gonna do it again tonight, like
Speaker 2: a little farewell, like a goodbye, like I always think
Speaker 2: about that. We haven't like hung out other than like
Speaker 2: fucking working, which is annoying as well.
Speaker 1: That's I don't like hanging out with you, So hanging
Speaker 1: out with you while we work is already enough. And
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, if I need a detox, I have
Speaker 1: you been realizing I would just cleanse every time we
Speaker 1: finish working. No, I need to cleanse my body, Oh
Speaker 1: my god. And I'll probably go get like amatic drainage
Speaker 1: massage after this.
Speaker 2: Can we just move on? Yeah?
Speaker 1: I'm sure.
Speaker 2: So it's officially over for me. Okay, like I'm down
Speaker 2: tremendously bad, Like it's so over, Like it's not even
Speaker 2: twenty three and me was hacked and they have my
Speaker 2: fucking data. They have all of my data, they.
Speaker 1: Have all what is the data on there that's like
Speaker 1: so important.
Speaker 2: Mayan's higher genome?
Speaker 1: But what does that even mean? Like somebody like it's like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, someone knows my blood type. Oh go go.
Speaker 2: You are literally three decades away from like cloning human beings,
Speaker 2: Like they are going to literally clone me.
Speaker 1: But you're already pushing thirty. You're not getting cloned. They
Speaker 1: want the young people. They don't in three decades. In
Speaker 1: thirty years, I'm in my fucking prime.
Speaker 2: I'm in my fucking prime.
Speaker 1: You are in your prime.
Speaker 2: I was in the NBA decades.
Speaker 1: No one is gonna want to clone somebody who's like
Speaker 1: fifty six years old.
Speaker 2: No, you're cloning cloning my prime DNA I know. And
Speaker 2: also the telomeres have nothing to do with.
Speaker 1: It, which telo mirrors Kai, No, do not, don't, we don't. Okay,
Speaker 1: we can move on.
Speaker 3: It's the strands in your DNA that shows your biological age.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and you know what's crazy about the telomeres is
Speaker 2: when you eat a bunch of sugar, your glacogen levels
Speaker 2: KAI take it away.
Speaker 3: Okay, So when you eat sugar, basically your telomeres shortened,
Speaker 3: and that basically means you're gonna die soon, so you
Speaker 3: should eat sugar.
Speaker 2: Yep.
Speaker 1: Just so literally all they all are gonna die because
Speaker 1: we all just ordered fucking candy. Literally not meaning I
Speaker 1: did not answert what you had for dinner last night.
Speaker 1: He was dying. I will say I had a bite
Speaker 1: of his famous bowl and it was fucking yummy. The
Speaker 1: famous boo from KFC will always be good, even though
Speaker 1: it like actually tastes like I just ate a bunch
Speaker 1: of cans and like rations in a basement.
Speaker 2: You did just have a bite. You had three the
Speaker 2: entire hold on hold, you had a order of it,
Speaker 2: and then you went and made fun of my fucking
Speaker 2: chicken rap with macaroni and cheese on.
Speaker 1: That didn't make fun of it.
Speaker 2: I kept begging.
Speaker 1: I was begging for a bite of that because he
Speaker 1: told me when he described it. At first, I was like,
Speaker 1: that sounds awful, and then when I got there, I
Speaker 1: was like, wait, this might be fucking yummy. So that
Speaker 1: was my dinner was a few bites of Drew's catastrophe dinner.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, and you're hoeh you had like a hanging
Speaker 1: little like pube.
Speaker 2: Mm okay, wait I was.
Speaker 3: I was a little bit curious about you. Guys mentioned
Speaker 3: that Josiah was on American Idol. Yeah, is there footage
Speaker 3: of that?
Speaker 2: No, he didn't make it through. There's like four tryout
Speaker 2: rounds before you can even be on TV.
Speaker 1: And so like all the people who stuck on American Idol,
Speaker 1: they literally are like, this is gonna be good, which
Speaker 1: is so psychological torture evil. The footage, no, bit, if
Speaker 1: there was footage, we would have that ship on log
Speaker 1: that would be on. I would that would be my
Speaker 1: first story highlight on my instag.
Speaker 2: Gonna say I would post it on my story every
Speaker 2: other day like Josiah flopping on fucking American that got.
Speaker 1: Talent, American that got talent? Okay, fuck you should we
Speaker 1: say what our stalking stand for? I got one true
Speaker 1: because they didn't have an E.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I got one for.
Speaker 3: Q.
Speaker 2: If you're listening, that was a sign from Q.
Speaker 1: You think you could yank that and it wouldn't fall?
Speaker 2: Can you suck my balls?
Speaker 1: Yeah? I would do that.
Speaker 2: Do that challenge? What is your stand for?
Speaker 1: Mine stands for a hole for hole butthole.
Speaker 2: But we got x Ford because he's the X factor.
Speaker 1: Because we want to x him out of our lives,
Speaker 1: but we don't know how yet, so we're thinking about it.
Speaker 2: I got it because I was like, it's the X
Speaker 2: factor And then you said that that is why he's
Speaker 2: I forgot factor actor.
Speaker 3: That's so sweet. I didn't know that was for me.
Speaker 1: Guys, actually smaller because you will you will never be.
Speaker 2: Because because he's really petty and tiny. I'm super Did
Speaker 2: you guys know my waist size is eighty four twenty four.
Speaker 3: It's eight now no way. Yeah, it's eight.
Speaker 1: How are you alive?
Speaker 3: I don't know.
Speaker 1: I don't think there's babies who are in.
Speaker 2: It nasty, drinking, fucking boom milk all the time. You
Speaker 2: think you're so baby.
Speaker 1: You had the ugliest baby if I had two of them.
Speaker 2: You know what's crazy is my mom literally loved us
Speaker 2: and thought we were cute, like she saw the mother disease.
Speaker 1: Moms always think their babies are cute in there.
Speaker 2: I think there is like a word for it. I don't. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: but have you seen the baby picture? It's crazy.
Speaker 1: He's disgusting. I bet if you look up Drew Phillips
Speaker 1: baby you can find it. Yeah, dude, you like somehow
Speaker 1: came out of the womb looking like you were being
Speaker 1: held in an airfire dehydrator. It was crazy, like when
Speaker 1: you put skittles in a dehydrator, I like.
Speaker 2: Puffed up out the sides like a macaron. No, it's crazy,
Speaker 2: like I literally look, yeah, that's not even a picture
Speaker 2: we're talking about. That was like headshot.
Speaker 1: But what's crazy? Head shot?
Speaker 2: Wait sabrinas and that the head is so longer.
Speaker 3: Than that one.
Speaker 2: It's so long.
Speaker 3: But the other one you got body?
Speaker 2: I look unhigh healthy, like what's crazy?
Speaker 1: As they posed them up. So that was probably the
Speaker 1: best picture, that's what I'm.
Speaker 2: Saying, Which that was a few days after I settled
Speaker 2: into like my skin disease that I was born with.
Speaker 2: But again, while that one pops up, I do want
Speaker 2: to talk about. Don't read my fucking notes. These are
Speaker 2: all supposed to be surprising.
Speaker 1: To if you get a text, I want to Seeho's
Speaker 1: texting you?
Speaker 2: Okay? And if I was actually.
Speaker 1: So jealous in bed last night, I was like, I
Speaker 1: fell asleep right before one and was getting text all nice, Yeah.
Speaker 2: That's it. That's the alien baby, Like I have no right.
Speaker 1: I was big, and baby realized he was allergic.
Speaker 2: It was crazy. Was I like literally was big ingredy
Speaker 2: in their womb? And Madeline was like three quarters of
Speaker 2: the size of me, or no, like one quarter of
Speaker 2: the size of me. She was like this big and
Speaker 2: I was just like this ginormous fucking hunk of meat,
Speaker 2: like I was a giant baby. What were you saying? Wait,
Speaker 2: what were you saying?
Speaker 3: You look? I was gonna say, you look less moisturiz
Speaker 3: than those aliens that we found.
Speaker 1: Y'all didn't find aliens ignore him. He's breaking.
Speaker 3: I don't want to reveal that on this episode that gave.
Speaker 2: The Mexico Aliens delivered it to him because they gave
Speaker 2: us the best deal.
Speaker 3: Yeah, they gave us the best deal. No, No, he's right,
Speaker 3: he's right.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, what were you saying that?
Speaker 1: Girl?
Speaker 2: I don't know you were jealous of me?
Speaker 1: Oh you were gonna Okay, now that's why you remember
Speaker 1: you are crazy. I think he's wrong with you. But
Speaker 1: he was getting text like all through the night. But
Speaker 1: then I did look over and it was family group chat,
Speaker 1: so I didn't care.
Speaker 2: Oh, and you're jealous. You know you're jealous as fuck
Speaker 2: because people.
Speaker 1: Loople want to communicate with me.
Speaker 2: I'm just a pleasant person to talk to. I haven't
Speaker 2: responded to my family group chatt in months because I'm
Speaker 2: the black sheep and everything I say is just weird.
Speaker 2: Everything I say is weird. Okay, But if everything genuinely everything,
Speaker 2: if it goes wrong for me, I've decided what my
Speaker 2: next venture in life is gonna be, and like, I
Speaker 2: think I can give myself to like thirty five to
Speaker 2: figure my shit out. And if I don't, this is
Speaker 2: when I start going down this rabbit hole. But I
Speaker 2: think I want to be like a ninth grade teacher.
Speaker 2: Like I'm not even kidding, Like that's really sweet. I
Speaker 2: actually think I do. I was watching this guy's TikTok today.
Speaker 2: I was talking about like his ninth graders, and like
Speaker 2: he posts a video every single day, like after school,
Speaker 2: just talking about an event that happened, and like the
Speaker 2: amount of euphoria that I was like getting, like thinking
Speaker 2: about like teaching a bunch of ninth graders and like
Speaker 2: them being mean to me. But then we have us
Speaker 2: having like a little rapport and like me having the
Speaker 2: kids that I no, no, no, just like you know
Speaker 2: the I know what you mean.
Speaker 1: Also you have boogers, so so your motherfucker fuck away
Speaker 1: from how long did you? Like literally three seconds? Because
Speaker 1: I wanted I didn't want to cut you off. Oh
Speaker 1: I thought you rubbed it on her carpet. I used
Speaker 1: to want to be an English teacher when I was
Speaker 1: in ninth grade, and that's what I thought I was
Speaker 1: gonna do because I was like, actually, I don't think
Speaker 1: I'm gonna make it to entertainment because I'm too annoying.
Speaker 1: But then I thought about it. I was like I
Speaker 1: would one hundred percent go to Joe for fucking hitting
Speaker 1: a kid, Like, let someone talk back to me, Like
Speaker 1: I would be those you know when you see videos
Speaker 1: of teachers and you're like, why is this teacher going
Speaker 1: back and forth with a child? It's so unnecessary and
Speaker 1: I feel that, but then I think about it and
Speaker 1: like in that position, I would go crazy, Like teachers
Speaker 1: who deal with teenagers or middle schoolers are so brave,
Speaker 1: but even people now, I feel like a bunch of
Speaker 1: teachers in like elementary school are talking about how gnarly
Speaker 1: kids are now, and they're like, but fuck dumb because
Speaker 1: they just want to be on TikTok and shit, Like
Speaker 1: I'm back, he didn't have been talking about we're talking
Speaker 1: about how dumb kids are.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah yeah yeah. I've been seeing a bunch of
Speaker 2: videos too of teachers being like, oh, we're like fucked,
Speaker 2: Like it's never ever ever been this bad. And that's where.
Speaker 3: People are on their phones and.
Speaker 2: It's literally just like since everyone grew up in the pandemic,
Speaker 2: like on online school and ship that like their reading
Speaker 2: levels are like four levels below what they should be
Speaker 2: and like it's just crazy. But like I was saying,
Speaker 2: that's where I come in to save the day.
Speaker 1: You think you're going to make a generational change.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm gonna raise how many schools would you be
Speaker 2: teaching at one? But I'm gonna raise some fucking geniuses,
Speaker 2: Like I'm gonna raise the people that are going to
Speaker 2: change the world, because that's all children are, is the
Speaker 2: next generation the world.
Speaker 3: Because you grew up during the pandemic.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, you are only seventeen.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I like forget that a lot. I just hang
Speaker 2: around a lot get to their people. No, actually it
Speaker 2: was like during the pandemic and it was really fucking sad.
Speaker 2: I've just been hanging around like a lot of older
Speaker 2: people recently, and I to forget my age sometimes and
Speaker 2: it's just like I need to like slow down and like, also,
Speaker 2: y'all give me like hella fucking drugs. It's like weird,
Speaker 2: like my brain doesn't even developed.
Speaker 1: Cool. And we'd rather have you do it at home
Speaker 1: than do it with like people we don't know.
Speaker 2: I'm not.
Speaker 3: We don't want you at some random house just like
Speaker 3: doing pills and ship whyn't you're doing it here with us?
Speaker 1: Yeah, we'd rather you take a perk and p perks
Speaker 1: so fucking bad.
Speaker 3: Please the wallflowers you're stalking, guys, the wallflowers be like,
Speaker 3: don't even like fucking.
Speaker 2: No one cares because what.
Speaker 1: You said, I want to perk so bad, And I
Speaker 1: said the wallflowers before.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, that sucks the perks.
Speaker 1: For being a wallflower.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I just got the perks of being a wallflower.
Speaker 1: Yeah, thank you, thank you. Guys.
Speaker 2: So y'all know that feeling like when you get home
Speaker 2: and like you didn't have to go to the bathroom,
Speaker 2: but like you're walking up the stairs to your apartment,
Speaker 2: or like you're walking through the garage door and like
Speaker 2: you your body like somehow senses that like bathroom nearby.
Speaker 2: I need to like unload like my piss now or
Speaker 2: I'll die, like y'all have had that. Yeah, there's a
Speaker 2: name for it. It's called the latch key in kant.
Speaker 2: That's not the word, I just.
Speaker 1: Have a type of Both words have a typo, so.
Speaker 2: It might be incontinence. It's latch key in continence. Maybe
Speaker 2: I could be wrong, but there is that is like
Speaker 2: a universal experience for everyone where they're like it's like
Speaker 2: something to do with like your mind, like understanding that
Speaker 2: unlocking the door and walking up these steps and smelling
Speaker 2: the scent all means that there's a bathroom nearby that
Speaker 2: you're comfortable in, and it's just like, let's fucking evacuate. Nam.
Speaker 1: All that reminds you of is that video of that
Speaker 1: lady was like anybody else's baby. Notice when they get
Speaker 1: back home and it's like her going down her driveway
Speaker 1: that's like cobble stone.
Speaker 2: And like bumps, like baby waking up.
Speaker 1: But it's because like that's.
Speaker 2: The thing I was talking about earlier than mom, like
Speaker 2: uh uh mom. It starts with a D, the mother delusion.
Speaker 2: No no, no, no, no fuck motheruck.
Speaker 1: I know we're talking like how they think their baby
Speaker 1: is the cutest, but they also think their baby is
Speaker 1: like the smartest.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, what is that word? Someone like, leave it
Speaker 2: in the comments because it's gonna drive me fucking insane.
Speaker 1: Um, you were not gonna check the comments for that shit.
Speaker 2: I literally will, Oh, I'll look it up for you
Speaker 2: right now, Drew.
Speaker 3: I'll look it up right now.
Speaker 2: Thank you. It's like dissonance. Is it mother's dissonance? I
Speaker 2: don't know.
Speaker 1: I think dissonance is.
Speaker 2: Like cognitive dissonance.
Speaker 1: Cognitive dissonance I think is when you like detach yourself
Speaker 1: from something. So I don't think it's mother's dissonance.
Speaker 3: Well maybe Drew's mom had.
Speaker 1: Probably she needs to give it to herself, and she
Speaker 1: was looking at.
Speaker 2: That thing so scared of me. She had the disconnect.
Speaker 1: That's why there's a lock outside of your door. Your
Speaker 1: mom planted it because she was like, he'll know he's home.
Speaker 2: Yeah. They still every once in a while will just
Speaker 2: lock me in my room when I'm sleeping, which is
Speaker 2: so incredible dangerous to.
Speaker 1: Jump out the window if all else fails.
Speaker 2: Whatever helps them sleep comfortably at night.
Speaker 1: Sure, but your parents lock you in the house.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and you do, I mean, you deserve it.
Speaker 1: So I get like I just had to take notes
Speaker 1: from them because I was like, I honestly agree and share.
Speaker 2: Take notes into a Walmart, so I, oh, you would
Speaker 2: know a lot about a Walmart. I don't know anything. Actually,
Speaker 2: like you would know a lot about a Walmar. Seem
Speaker 2: like a Walmart excepert justin Bieber, Walmart, justin Bieber. Okay,
Speaker 2: I've had this note taken down for laterly months and
Speaker 2: stop reading my notes.
Speaker 1: I'm literally not I'm just like my caveman brain seas
Speaker 1: an iPhone screen and I'm just staring at it like open.
Speaker 2: Night, like practicing for school. Stop reading.
Speaker 1: I'm literally doing what I do when I go to
Speaker 1: a restaurant and I see a menu, like words mean nothing,
Speaker 1: and I'm just looking at something because my eyes are
Speaker 1: trying to like find something to entertain me because I'm
Speaker 1: so used to looking at im.
Speaker 2: Yeah, when you go to like dinner with like a
Speaker 2: new person and y'all are still like trying to figure
Speaker 2: each other out and like sniffing each other's asses, like
Speaker 2: just seeing what type of person they are, Like I
Speaker 2: do that only when I'm doing that.
Speaker 1: No, no matter who I go to a restaurant, I
Speaker 1: will look at the menu and not look at it
Speaker 1: like I can't read it.
Speaker 2: No, when I'm like if I don't know the person
Speaker 2: and we're just like learning who we are, like learning
Speaker 2: a lot about each other, Like I'll look at the
Speaker 2: menu as like this like safety.
Speaker 1: Barrier, like a buffer.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like a buffer to the conversation so I
Speaker 2: can like plan in my head how I'm going to
Speaker 2: respond and what person I'm gonna be because of the fucking.
Speaker 1: I'm a fucking psycho.
Speaker 2: No, I one of my fucking psycho. I can. I
Speaker 2: can literally change my personality on who I'm communicating with.
Speaker 2: And y'all are.
Speaker 1: Jealous, that's what you think is happening in your head
Speaker 1: Like that. I thought Jews perceiving a social interactions, But
Speaker 1: like Jews.
Speaker 2: The same steps ahead.
Speaker 1: He's the same person every time we're around new people,
Speaker 1: Like I know the kind of person who.
Speaker 2: When I'm with you, because I know the person I
Speaker 2: get to be when I'm with you. But when I
Speaker 2: take meetings without you or I meet new people without you,
Speaker 2: you don't know that.
Speaker 1: I feel like you act like way more normal.
Speaker 2: Yeah, because you're not there to bounce off of.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I have no buffer when I meet new people.
Speaker 1: It's actually a big problems. I will leave every social
Speaker 1: interaction being like damn, I really dominated that room for
Speaker 1: no reason, Like, well why did I do that? But
Speaker 1: it's okay because people love me. Actually, everybody was replying
Speaker 1: to that close friends. It was like, do not change.
Speaker 1: We love you like that? Can I have with you?
Speaker 2: No? I thought Salem was going to reply to that.
Speaker 2: I just thought I had like a female's intuition when
Speaker 2: you start calling women female. No, but I've been meaning
Speaker 2: to talk about this for literally months. It's just been
Speaker 2: in my notes for like a long fucking time. Oh wait,
Speaker 2: does this guy think I'm going to be meeting him
Speaker 2: at the door?
Speaker 3: This this grinder, dude, the way you use your phone.
Speaker 2: When I get the notification, I'll let one of you'all know,
Speaker 2: and then if you wouldn't mind, But meaning to talk
Speaker 2: about this were so goddamn long, and it's just been
Speaker 2: in my notes and then we just never get to it,
Speaker 2: and we might have already talked about it, and I
Speaker 2: just am not remembering. But hamsters, like literally hamsters, like
Speaker 2: they're crazy. Okay, they're like little pandas.
Speaker 1: Lose my fucking mind. I think I'm like done. No,
Speaker 1: I just starting to cry, like what are we doing?
Speaker 2: No, No, I have tears. We both broke at the
Speaker 2: same time.
Speaker 1: That's it, Like we were done, like.
Speaker 3: Us place.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, dude.
Speaker 4: Like I was like literally crying, like I quite literally cry,
Speaker 4: Like I don't know what that just did to me,
Speaker 4: but like that made me feel every like like nerve
Speaker 4: in my body, and I like realized I was here,
Speaker 4: and I felt the fire behind me, and I like.
Speaker 2: You're wait too, You're welcome. My ground did you know,
Speaker 2: But I just more meant like how hamsters die really easily.
Speaker 1: Okay, okay, hampster is the most abused ever. I was
Speaker 1: gonna set up to like a six year old and
Speaker 1: let them like like throw them around.
Speaker 2: There, That's what I'm saying. They're like little small pandas. Also,
Speaker 2: if you look at them and they like fall around,
Speaker 2: then you know the videos of like pandas falling everywhere.
Speaker 2: But what I recently found out, and I'm sure everybody
Speaker 2: already knows this, and this was already commenting it because
Speaker 2: they want to like get to the fucking punch on
Speaker 2: corner than me, because there's so much better than me.
Speaker 2: Oh my god. Oh the food is literally.
Speaker 1: Here, like god man, something's wrong with here.
Speaker 2: But hamsters literally hibernate. They go into hibernation.
Speaker 1: I don't know that.
Speaker 2: I know, no one fucking knew that. So like half
Speaker 2: of the time when kids got there, yes, when kids
Speaker 2: thought their hamsters were dead, the parents thought they were
Speaker 2: dead too, They were literally in hibernation. And we all
Speaker 2: just buried our hamsters alive. Yes, I know that literally
Speaker 2: just gagged away scared.
Speaker 1: Did you have a hamster?
Speaker 2: I hamster And it was probably in hibernation.
Speaker 1: Killed your hamster.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you used to feed a pencils. No, that's a
Speaker 2: vibe like to chew on the wood, Like I get it,
Speaker 2: I get it. Yeah, just not the lead.
Speaker 1: It's giving your hamster lead poisoning and be like all.
Speaker 2: But yeah, so a lot of people just were killing
Speaker 2: their hamsters because they were in hibernation and they didn't
Speaker 2: realize it. So a lot of y'all are murderers. And
Speaker 2: if you're worried about your if you were going to
Speaker 2: hell or not, you for sure are now because you
Speaker 2: literally buried a creature alive. You're over the.
Speaker 1: Same children who had hamsters when they were younger, or
Speaker 1: like the equivalent to iPad babies. Does that make sense.
Speaker 4: That's like that's like before there were iPads, you would
Speaker 4: give your kid a hamster play with.
Speaker 2: Yeah. It was also like my parents' reasoning was like
Speaker 2: to like teach us that other things are alive and
Speaker 2: we have to like respect that. But I we had fish,
Speaker 2: and then my brothers poured like three liters of coke
Speaker 2: and their fish tank one day and the fish like
Speaker 2: jumped out to survive and they just landed on the counter.
Speaker 2: But I saved them. Okay, yeah, and I was really
Speaker 2: fucking young. I love it. Wait wait wait wait wait,
Speaker 2: let me let me let me finish the hamster thing right, Okay,
Speaker 2: you can get one time. I like before school, my
Speaker 2: mom and dad got really pissed at me and my
Speaker 2: sister because we were like neglected our hamster as like
Speaker 2: a seven year old that like we weren't cleaning its
Speaker 2: cage properly.
Speaker 1: Like I mean literally just straight up doo doo factory.
Speaker 2: It was hell, and we were like not taking care
Speaker 2: of it properly. So our parents were like very adamant,
Speaker 2: like clean this fucking critter's cage right now, or like
Speaker 2: your ground did. So, like we started the cleaning process,
Speaker 2: and like we put the hamster in the sink inside
Speaker 2: the cage with the door shut after we finished cleaning it,
Speaker 2: because like we had to like clean the the basin next,
Speaker 2: and we just like didn't have enough time before school
Speaker 2: because it was just like whatever. So we went to
Speaker 2: school and then we came home and my cat had
Speaker 2: snuck into the bathroom of the where we were cleaning
Speaker 2: the hamster's cage. And since the hamster cage was in
Speaker 2: the basin to like the sink, the cat had accidentally
Speaker 2: turned on scorching hot water and it was on for
Speaker 2: literally like four hours, and the hamster literally drowned inside
Speaker 2: the cage. And my brother like walked in and was.
Speaker 1: Like, you can't experience fear factory.
Speaker 2: And they were like you can't. My brother was like,
Speaker 2: you literally cannot see this, Like you you don't, you
Speaker 2: don't want to see this, don't come to literally and
Speaker 2: my cat killed my fucking hamster and like it literally
Speaker 2: like it was in a cage like probably trying to escape.
Speaker 2: Like it was literally so sad. I literally like cried
Speaker 2: for months over that fucking hamster because I was like, wow,
Speaker 2: like this is my fault. Natural selection literally like don't
Speaker 2: be a stupid fucking hamster if you're gonna drown like child, don't.
Speaker 1: Be born a hamster if you don't want to be
Speaker 1: drowned by there's that. Yeah, But we had a sucker
Speaker 1: fish and it was fucking huge. Like are they called
Speaker 1: catfish or sucker like the ones that like they're called
Speaker 1: plecos stucked get stuck to the glass and they like
Speaker 1: clean the algae.
Speaker 2: They're called pleos, are they?
Speaker 1: Yeah, Well we had one of those really fucking big
Speaker 1: and it was humongous, and it died while my dad
Speaker 1: was at work, and like we when our fish would die,
Speaker 1: we would like put them in the toilet and like
Speaker 1: sit over and be like bye, and like flush the toilet.
Speaker 1: And I was like, oh, like we were getting ahead
Speaker 1: of the curb and I was like, oh, we're gonna
Speaker 1: flush it. It was humongous, like it literally was the
Speaker 1: size like we could have eaten it, like it was
Speaker 1: so big, and we threw it in the toilet and
Speaker 1: we were like me and my little siblings were like, oh,
Speaker 1: like yeah, it was one of those. And we were like, oh,
Speaker 1: my God, like rest in peace, like we love you
Speaker 1: so much. You were amazing. And then we flushed the toilet.
Speaker 1: Bitch that ship got stuck in the fucking pipes. And
Speaker 1: my dad came home and was like, why is it
Speaker 1: the toilet working? And we were like I don't know,
Speaker 1: like I don't know what happened, Like we haven't done anything.
Speaker 1: And then my dad took off the pipes just to
Speaker 1: find our fish stuck in the pipes. And my dad
Speaker 1: was like, the know it was dead. As far as
Speaker 1: we were concerned, that ship was not moving for a
Speaker 1: long time.
Speaker 2: If I was your dad been like, oh, wow, they
Speaker 2: killed my fucking fish.
Speaker 1: Yeah. My dad was like, why did y'all do that?
Speaker 1: Why didn't you wait till we get home? And we
Speaker 1: were like we thought we were like getting ahead of it.
Speaker 1: We didn't want it to stink.
Speaker 2: That's sweet though, And then we all got in.
Speaker 1: Trouble because he had to replace a bunch of the
Speaker 1: pipes because he had to literally saw one of the
Speaker 1: pipes in half because it like the mouth of it
Speaker 1: got stuck to like the curve and the pipe, so
Speaker 1: he like took it out and was trying to get
Speaker 1: it out, but it was like stuck in there. It's
Speaker 1: we all had to poop in the backyard.
Speaker 2: It was so weird. Okay, I do have a question
Speaker 2: for you. Did you ever like pray over your bed, Like,
Speaker 2: did you ever get on your yees and pray?
Speaker 1: I think you just called me Drew, by the way.
Speaker 2: No, I said a question for you.
Speaker 1: No, you said Drew, I have a question for you.
Speaker 1: I did, literally, I swear to God, did I actually
Speaker 1: have a question for you?
Speaker 2: No? No, no, no, I said dude or something.
Speaker 1: No you said Drew, because I was darned because I
Speaker 1: was like, oh, are you setting me up, like you
Speaker 1: want me to ask you. Yeah, I used to like
Speaker 1: get down and pray because I thought I was evil
Speaker 1: and I was going to hell because I was annoying.
Speaker 2: I wrote a big note down because like I would
Speaker 2: get over my bed and pray for just like real ship,
Speaker 2: like pray for my family's health. But then I would
Speaker 2: add in there, like I want to break a bone,
Speaker 2: like can you just like give me a cast? Like
Speaker 2: can you break can I break a bone so I
Speaker 2: can get a cast?
Speaker 1: Or like I prayed like that recently, not for a
Speaker 1: broken bone, but like I was like bored as fuck and.
Speaker 2: I have a billion dollars or something like down bad.
Speaker 1: I was like, damn, you know what, fuck it, like
Speaker 1: I'm downb here, And I literally got down at my
Speaker 1: bed like the bed I have now, and I was
Speaker 1: like this is a good prayer like area, and I
Speaker 1: like got down and I pray.
Speaker 2: Every once in a while, I'll do that, and then
Speaker 2: I'll pray when I have nothing else to give or
Speaker 2: to the.
Speaker 1: Love of my family and friends. Isn't doing it for me?
Speaker 2: Right now? I got and it works. Yeah, I wake
Speaker 2: up the next day good every time. But I remember
Speaker 2: specifically this one time. This is so gross. I don't
Speaker 2: even want to say it.
Speaker 1: Did you, Like, what did you?
Speaker 2: It's actually not gross. I I just prayed to get
Speaker 2: pink eye because I was like, in my head, I
Speaker 2: was like, pink guy's the most lit fucking disease to get,
Speaker 2: because like I didn't know what it was at the time, you.
Speaker 1: Didn't know it came to like fucking Dodoo munch, Like
Speaker 1: literally came from Doodoo munch.
Speaker 2: You weren't like sick as a dog, but you got
Speaker 2: to stay home from school. In my head, so I
Speaker 2: was just like cool, like I want pink.
Speaker 1: Kids came to school with pink at my school all
Speaker 1: the fucking time, and they tried to hide it, and they'd.
Speaker 2: Be like, why would you not want to stay home
Speaker 2: with pink eye?
Speaker 1: I think most kids weren't like allowed to stay home
Speaker 1: because their parents had to work and whatnot.
Speaker 2: So boring, boring. I got to stay home and eat
Speaker 2: chips and ride in the golf car.
Speaker 1: I literally, because like I grew up with like a
Speaker 1: single parent, I was not allowed to stay home when
Speaker 1: I was sick, so I would have to go to school.
Speaker 1: I remember one time my dad thought I was lying
Speaker 1: and I literally had thrown up everywhere in the office.
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm not making myself through up and
Speaker 1: he was like, he was like, did you kiss someone?
Speaker 1: And I was like, what are we talking about? I
Speaker 1: think I was in middle school and he was like,
Speaker 1: I think you kissed someone and you got sick. And
Speaker 1: I was like, you think I kissed someone today?
Speaker 2: And immediately the gestation period was like.
Speaker 1: The fastest moving metabolism ever, the fastest turnover ever.
Speaker 2: The most violent disease of all.
Speaker 1: And then my godfather was like, bruh, she did not
Speaker 1: kiss someone, like, she's definitely just sick. And my dad
Speaker 1: was like, not my end. I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker 1: I think she kissed someone I was kissing.
Speaker 2: You can't get like mono from kissing that. So I
Speaker 2: learned like what like kissing was, because we had to
Speaker 2: like be taught what mano was.
Speaker 1: If you were like twenty and you got mono, you
Speaker 1: need to go to jail. You're too old.
Speaker 2: Before we move on from that, I wanted to tell
Speaker 2: this really, really fucking nasty story about how when I
Speaker 2: got pink eye. I've probably already told it, but it's
Speaker 2: been enough time and there's probably a bunch of new listeners.
Speaker 2: But when I was really young, I was I mean,
Speaker 2: I still have them, and they just never figured out why.
Speaker 2: But like I would get like really gnarly constipated and
Speaker 2: like it would be like painful like blockage. And then
Speaker 2: I would also get like anytime I would eat, I
Speaker 2: would get so nauseous that I would throw up, like
Speaker 2: and this went on for like four months, and I
Speaker 2: like lost a lot of weight in my parents. No,
Speaker 2: they literally don't know what it is. But so they
Speaker 2: were like, let's fucking go in and look. So I
Speaker 2: got like a colonoscope when I was like twelve or thirteen,
Speaker 2: and I didn't know this at the time. My parents
Speaker 2: didn't know this, but they also scheduled me for an indoscopy,
Speaker 2: So colonoscopies up the ass, indo scopies like down the throat.
Speaker 2: And then I woke up from this procedure with like
Speaker 2: a feeding tube in my nose that went down to
Speaker 2: my stomach to like measure my bile and like acid levels.
Speaker 2: Well anyways, I woke up.
Speaker 1: Well that prayers, bitch, you want to stay over school?
Speaker 3: That bad?
Speaker 2: I know, literally I and I had to carry like
Speaker 2: a pouch around that like measured, like when I would
Speaker 2: have to like click a button when I would eat.
Speaker 2: It was so nerd. Yeah, it was so nerdy. It
Speaker 2: was so like so whatever.
Speaker 1: But if I was in your school, I would have
Speaker 1: popped that fucking bag. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Literally, No, it wasn't like a bouch. It was like
Speaker 2: a big electronic.
Speaker 1: Brickho you had a pager?
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, literally, but it was huge and I had
Speaker 2: to carry it around like a fucking purse. I was
Speaker 2: so embarrassed. But I woke up from that procedure with
Speaker 2: the gnarliest pink eye of my life, meaning that they
Speaker 2: did not properly clean after my colonoscopy and gave me
Speaker 2: pink eye when they and I don't know if they
Speaker 2: use the same fucking tube or what, but like that ship,
Speaker 2: it was the gnarliest like pink I've ever had. It
Speaker 2: was violent, Like I literally thought I was gonna go blind.
Speaker 2: And my parents were like, oh, like must have been
Speaker 2: from this surgery. And I was like like, I was like, wait,
Speaker 2: that's crazy.
Speaker 1: Someone off and they literally after touching your butt, they
Speaker 1: fucking rubbed your eye.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Literally, this annoying ass kids.
Speaker 2: Pillow Madaline farted in my pillow.
Speaker 1: I only got pink eye once, and it was when
Speaker 1: I got COVID. And it was when that was like
Speaker 1: at the beginning of COVID, when they were like, oh,
Speaker 1: if you like randomly get pink eye or a sty,
Speaker 1: it can and you are sick at the same time,
Speaker 1: it can be a sign of COVID. And I woke
Speaker 1: up with pink eye and then got a style like
Speaker 1: the pink guy went away almost immediately, and then it
Speaker 1: turned into a sty.
Speaker 2: I have bad news because you farted on my phone. No,
Speaker 2: I didn't fart on your fucking pillow. I ship inside
Speaker 2: of it. I ripped it open and ship inside the
Speaker 2: fluffing and it's still in there.
Speaker 1: It's just like, No, I got new pillows and I
Speaker 1: put my old pillows in your room, So you've been
Speaker 1: sleeping on your ship.
Speaker 2: But that's that backfired. That backfired like crazy. But back
Speaker 2: to praying. I used to pray to be never mind,
Speaker 2: we're moving on.
Speaker 1: You were using God for weird reasons. Oh, you better
Speaker 1: keep praying. We should start praying for that together. Like
Speaker 1: the night before we got a bed an opposite signs.
Speaker 2: Of my bed like please please please, Well, since we're
Speaker 2: on like medical, my new year's resolution. Yeah, really same
Speaker 2: like and ironically literally the same. But since we're on
Speaker 2: medical ship, I really do think I have one really
Speaker 2: short leg and one like really long leg walk. I
Speaker 2: think one of my legs is like genuinely like a
Speaker 2: quarter or half of them.
Speaker 1: For me saying you were hobbling around the house.
Speaker 2: I've always thought this, like if you look back in
Speaker 2: my notes, I would just write it down randomly because
Speaker 2: I was so like, I can't stop hobbling literally, and
Speaker 2: I do have like such a strange like cadence to
Speaker 2: my step. And the only way I can explain it
Speaker 2: is that one of my legs is shorter than the other,
Speaker 2: like by.
Speaker 1: Like a It's because you spend too much time in
Speaker 1: your bed, so your body has to react.
Speaker 2: Walk spinish, stretching back out. But yeah, I just wanted
Speaker 2: to get that off my chest because it's really dark.
Speaker 3: Wait, Drew, do you not know that one of your
Speaker 3: legs is six inch shorter than the other.
Speaker 1: No, we put stilts on you every night so that
Speaker 1: you could just wake up. We take them off at
Speaker 1: night and then we put them back on.
Speaker 2: One of my balls is shorter than the other. But
Speaker 2: that's a classic man thing. To be worried about. Yeah,
Speaker 2: like when you're like nine and you're like, fuck, dude,
Speaker 2: like my balls, like I think I'm broken. One of
Speaker 2: them is like longer than the other one, and then
Speaker 2: you google it and you find out like it's normal.
Speaker 3: It's normal.
Speaker 1: After Jimmy Neutral. Anytime I watched the old cartoons we
Speaker 1: grew up watching, I was like, this is why I'm
Speaker 1: so fucking annoying. Yeah, like they were so goddamn annoying, dude.
Speaker 2: That one fucking because it's like Joe.
Speaker 1: Rogan is that actually Joe Rogan's Company?
Speaker 2: Yeah, are you lying?
Speaker 1: High?
Speaker 2: I'm Paul is Joe Rogan's company? Shut the fuck up?
Speaker 1: Okay, the other one because I would have known that.
Speaker 3: No, But you have a like a you have like
Speaker 3: a relative that's very young, right, Yeah, they and they
Speaker 3: watch cartoons. What do they watch like the shorts? Okay,
Speaker 3: because they don't watch like SpongeBob and sh it anymore.
Speaker 2: And they do like yeah, still like The Biggest.
Speaker 3: Car Where do they watch it?
Speaker 2: Just on on TV? Dude? I was watching like.
Speaker 1: Disney stuff like carries like kids cartoons.
Speaker 2: They also like direct TV like cable boxes and ships
Speaker 2: still run it. But I was watching my nephew watch
Speaker 2: SpongeBob one. The new SpongeBob is so fucking bricked. It
Speaker 2: fucking sucks. Yeah, like it's be it's horrible, like don't
Speaker 2: even get me started. But also like it was so
Speaker 2: crazy because there would be like a QR code like
Speaker 2: permanently in the corner, and then there would be like
Speaker 2: another little screen down here playing like an hour advertisement,
Speaker 2: and then like another little screen would pop up halfway
Speaker 2: through the episode and play like another cartoon, and then
Speaker 2: the corner down here would just have like a fucking
Speaker 2: cockroach run by. Like it was so weird. Now I
Speaker 2: it's like, damn dude, like we're like down tremendously bad.
Speaker 2: And it just reminded me of that like hyper reality,
Speaker 2: like augmented reality video that like everyone was obsessed with
Speaker 2: for a little bit or it literally probably was just me,
Speaker 2: but like there's like this video where it shows you
Speaker 2: like what augmented reality is gonna look like in a
Speaker 2: few years, and it was just like really freaky. But
Speaker 2: it's like ten years old now.
Speaker 1: Like if you watch Ren and Stimpy, it's crazy how
Speaker 1: slow the pacing of that show is, and like all
Speaker 1: those older cartoons that we grew up watching. The pacing
Speaker 1: is so slow, even like the Looney Tunes from like
Speaker 1: two thousand and nine, like where it's like Daffy and
Speaker 1: bugs Bunny are living together. I was watching on the
Speaker 1: plane tuns. Yeah, they were always in Looney Tunes. There
Speaker 1: were loomty tunes. But if you watch those now, Like
Speaker 1: I rewatching Renston because I was, like I loved it
Speaker 1: as a kid. I want to rewatch it, or even
Speaker 1: like Pinky in the Brain, like all that older.
Speaker 2: Stuff we used to watch.
Speaker 1: It used to Oh okay, wow, what.
Speaker 2: Did you like to watch porn?
Speaker 1: He watched porn when you were like six?
Speaker 2: Okay you didn't.
Speaker 1: That's right, dude, that's like that's like almost I would
Speaker 1: even say that child abuse. Okay, you got to start
Speaker 1: a young and macroser that's why he's addicted to macro
Speaker 1: dos macro dosing porn now because he was watching so
Speaker 1: much of it. But like, the pacing of those shows
Speaker 1: is so slow compared to newer shows. Like if you
Speaker 1: watch like a newer kids cartoon, something is happening every frame,
Speaker 1: there's like a loud noise or like it's super colorful.
Speaker 1: I think about Coco Melon I will never forget. Like
Speaker 1: I know a woman who had a baby like last
Speaker 1: year and we were like, oh, it's when we were
Speaker 1: in the cabin and she she I was like genuinely
Speaker 1: just curious because I have a bunch of cousins who
Speaker 1: like baby cousins who watch Coco Melon and shit, And
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, does your baby watch Coco Melon?
Speaker 1: And she said when she said this, it literally changed
Speaker 1: my mind about children's cartoon. And she was like, I
Speaker 1: genuinely believe that letting your child watch something like Coco
Speaker 1: Melon is like giving your baby LSD before it even
Speaker 1: has like cognitive reality, and your baby will be like
Speaker 1: anticipating that kind of like intense attention and like quickness
Speaker 1: forever and it's going to be debilitating.
Speaker 2: And I was like, oh my god, Like I do
Speaker 2: believe that to a certain extent, but like there are
Speaker 2: some good children shows that I'm like, damn, like that's
Speaker 2: really it actually is like teaching kids something and it's
Speaker 2: specifically Miss Rachel, Like Miss Rachel like like there is
Speaker 2: literally a video proof of my sister's daughter like learning
Speaker 2: how to clap from the TV show that she's watching.
Speaker 1: And it's kind of like the idea like there's always
Speaker 1: been that, like Courge the Cowardly Dog was not good
Speaker 1: for us, like it was literally so like existentialism core
Speaker 1: for children, and like things like that aren't apparently good
Speaker 1: for kids. But there are shows like fucking Blippy, like
Speaker 1: the fact that that Blippy guy got away with like
Speaker 1: shitting on someone putting on the line and then.
Speaker 2: Just that, Yeah, dude, Blippy literally did There used to
Speaker 2: be this video going around of the Harlem Shake. But Blippy,
Speaker 2: who is a child show like kids show like host.
Speaker 2: You know Blippy, You've seen him in Walmart and shit,
Speaker 2: he did the Harlem Shake challenge, but then when the
Speaker 2: drop happened, he him and his homie got butt ass
Speaker 2: naked and he had his homie spray him with ship
Speaker 2: out of his butt. So there's video getting ship all over.
Speaker 2: I screened saved it because Blippy and his team do
Speaker 2: everything in their power to erase that video from the
Speaker 2: internet because it is really gnarly and it's like maybe
Speaker 2: the most horrifying and discussing thing I've ever seen in
Speaker 2: my life. And the fact that he's like a child's
Speaker 2: show host is crazy to me.
Speaker 1: But I believe also because I don't but I believe
Speaker 1: people could change, but I don't think it comes from
Speaker 1: like an actual, real place of giving a fuck about
Speaker 1: teaching children anything because I remember he's getting yeah literally,
Speaker 1: I feel like that's the big problem is like we
Speaker 1: all know, like now that children have so much access
Speaker 1: to media, like it used to be reverse, Like you
Speaker 1: used to have to really have a craving and a
Speaker 1: want to be within children's education in media and entertainment,
Speaker 1: and it was like so sparing that you were actually
Speaker 1: making something that was like teaching children something because nobody
Speaker 1: wanted to put money into it because there was this
Speaker 1: idea that kid shouldn't even be in front of the TV,
Speaker 1: So why the fuck would you put money into it?
Speaker 1: And now we all know that children literally have access
Speaker 1: to iPhones and iPads by the time they're three years old,
Speaker 1: So there's so much money in putting a screen in
Speaker 1: front of a baby's face. So so many people make
Speaker 1: children's content because the bag is endless because children also
Speaker 1: children's rewatch value. Like imagine how many times we were
Speaker 1: sitting and throwing on a VHS, like eighteen times in
Speaker 1: a row, like bitch, I would watch.
Speaker 2: Five What is a VHS? Oh?
Speaker 1: I forget, I keep forgetting your seventeen.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I don't know what that shows.
Speaker 1: So a VHS is like this old timey like idea
Speaker 1: of like it was kind of like film panels. It
Speaker 1: was almost like, you know, gave me iPad?
Speaker 2: Yeah, sorry, give me my iPad.
Speaker 1: Okay, I'll give it to you. Do you want? Do
Speaker 1: you actually need it?
Speaker 2: Now?
Speaker 1: Okay we'll cut.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we have to cut for to get his iPad. Okay,
Speaker 3: how old are you at this point?
Speaker 2: Thirteen?
Speaker 3: Oh, you're thirteen?
Speaker 1: Your regresses because.
Speaker 3: I feel like a couple of years ago you were sixteen.
Speaker 1: The age is really slow. Okay, how does this sound?
Speaker 3: That sounds good? That sounds good. It sounds like the
Speaker 3: ocean waves crashing.
Speaker 2: How does this sound.
Speaker 3: That sounds good? That sounds really good.
Speaker 1: Well, that's it for the Christmas episode. I hope you
Speaker 1: guys have an amazing holiday. Whatever you celebrate it, you
Speaker 1: celebrate it to the fullest and get so drunk with
Speaker 1: your family and hopefully someone cries, because that's what Christmas
Speaker 1: with your family is about. Somebody will cry, and you
Speaker 1: will most likely be the therapist for your family. And
Speaker 1: if that's your job, kudos, yep.
Speaker 2: If you're a boy, hide in your room, play on
Speaker 2: your PS five fortnite. Don't interact with any of your
Speaker 2: family members because.
Speaker 1: You're fucking and you're gonna get highest fucking get scared
Speaker 1: of your whole family.
Speaker 2: Yes, uh no, genuinely enjoy your family time. I think
Speaker 2: we need more family time.
Speaker 1: Am I the only one who thinks family is back?
Speaker 2: In family, it's going to be. Family is going to
Speaker 2: be back.
Speaker 1: And our trend forecast for twenty twenty four, I think
Speaker 1: family is back.
Speaker 2: No, literally, though it fucking better be. But let me
Speaker 2: do a drew syop. I only have one today.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, wait, we have one that's in the email.
Speaker 2: Oh really, I think so well, I'll do this one.
Speaker 2: I put myself in your shoes and now my feet
Speaker 2: fucking stink.
Speaker 1: That was good. That was good? All right?
Speaker 2: Oh wait here, let's see y'all be eating lamb chops
Speaker 2: for attention them most tastes like missing people. Y'all are
Speaker 2: eating lamb chops for attention them. Hoose tastes like missing people.
Speaker 2: Shout out anissa an I s a anissa period.
Speaker 1: That is really fucking funny. Oh my god, that's how
Speaker 1: I feel about like boh eat goat too, like that
Speaker 1: shit literally tastes like fucking dirt roads.
Speaker 2: Oh wait, here's another one from Janine. Janine, Janine, before
Speaker 2: you gossip about me, rub your koochy and sniff your
Speaker 2: hand sis. Wait wait this, this one's from Janine, before
Speaker 2: you gossip about me, reb your cooochee and sniff your
Speaker 2: hand sys, because you got bigger fish to fry. Apparently
Speaker 2: Joe Biden said that. Whoa, Yeah, if.
Speaker 1: Joe Biden said that, I would revote for him. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's how Joe Biden can get my vote back. I
Speaker 1: really don't fuck with him right now, but I'm not kidding.
Speaker 1: If he got on the podium, I'd be like, fuck,
Speaker 1: I gotta give it to him.
Speaker 2: Guys, I really do read your syge up corners. I'm
Speaker 2: not gonna read your middle and last names because I
Speaker 2: don't want to doc you. But Janine, right, yeah, Janine,
Speaker 2: y'ah shut y'all. Y'all came in clutch.
Speaker 1: I feel like I found one that I wanted to read.
Speaker 1: Oh no, I didn't find when I wanted to show
Speaker 1: you this that Tyrrell showed me Jolie Jolie that y'all
Speaker 1: like lobster.
Speaker 2: Are those isopods.
Speaker 1: Um no, they're lobster. Somebody like cut them up and
Speaker 1: tried to present them nicely, but they look like roaches.
Speaker 2: Literally. We'll insert the picture for y'all.
Speaker 1: All right, well always, here's some media of the week.
Speaker 2: I e.
Speaker 1: My media of the week is Telephone Line by Electric
Speaker 1: Light Orchestra Folks song by the Sundays Before the Daybreaks
Speaker 1: Robin Goree robtree and Use your Heart s w V.
Speaker 2: Mine is a book. This time Boo Spotify added audio
Speaker 2: books and you actually can use them now. It was
Speaker 2: like for a long time you couldn't use them. And
Speaker 2: I started listening to the Year of Magical Thinking by
Speaker 2: Joan Didion. Oh I need to know that name. Uh,
Speaker 2: that ship's really fucking good. I think I'm gonna listen
Speaker 2: to the Song of Achilles next because I'm like, I
Speaker 2: heard a lot of good shit about that one. And
Speaker 2: then Norwegian Would by Mirakami. Those are my three in rotation.
Speaker 2: I also have Homo Deuce and Homo Sapiens and The
Speaker 2: log just because I love fucking those books so much.
Speaker 2: Should I go to like my very first playlist, Like
Speaker 2: I have a playlist on that I made, like probably
Speaker 2: a decade ago at this point, and it's OLED's do
Speaker 2: It Waka Flaka, Collared Green Schoolboy Q A Tale of
Speaker 2: Two Cities, J Cole, I am a god blood on
Speaker 2: the leaves. I'm in it. I was obsessed with Yezes, dude,
Speaker 2: pipe it up, migos, Oh my god, as Zz Gibson
Speaker 2: this song. I'm not gonna play it because we ran
Speaker 2: into copyright issues, me and my homies. We called her.
Speaker 2: It was so cringey. We called ourselves Snoop Squad, and
Speaker 2: we would buy a bunch of snacks and then get
Speaker 2: inside one of our homies trucks and literally turn on
Speaker 2: his blue lights, play that song on fucking repeat and
Speaker 2: get absolutely fucking obliterated on weed, like literally get the
Speaker 2: highest we've ever been. And then I would just like
Speaker 2: walk home because we were like smoking in this like
Speaker 2: section in my neighborhood. But they would have to drive home,
Speaker 2: and I don't know how none of them fucking died
Speaker 2: because we were like zooted and fucking booted, like it
Speaker 2: was voted in Boo Boots.
Speaker 1: My first playlist on here isn't from that long ago,
Speaker 1: because I started this account in like early twenty twenty
Speaker 1: and It's intimate, Erica de Cassir, I can't say her
Speaker 1: name ever, Carnival, the Cardigan's One Thing, AMIRII, Devotion by
Speaker 1: tearsa Lifetime by Eves tumor know who you are at
Speaker 1: every age, Cock two Twins, it's a bunch of cock
Speaker 1: two twins, a bunch of slow dive catched the breeze.
Speaker 1: It's like literally me trying to like set up like
Speaker 1: my Spotify with just songs I liked at the time
Speaker 1: and Kitty Cat by Beyonce.
Speaker 2: Mine is my next one is actually so advanced. Oh god,
Speaker 2: not that fucking song. But my next one is just
Speaker 2: called literally and it's fish Shopping, Sophie Eliminade, Sophie Viz,
Speaker 2: Sophie Pony Boys, Sophie Blips, Sophie Hard, Sophie M s
Speaker 2: M s M s M s ms Sophie. Then Hey qut,
Speaker 2: and then a bunch of Hannah Diamond.
Speaker 1: Remember when we would listen to Handah Diamond on SoundCloud.
Speaker 2: I fucking love Hannah Diamond.
Speaker 3: Cut is one of the best.
Speaker 1: Hey CUTI Yeah, thank you guys so much for listening.
Speaker 1: I hope you enjoyed the last few days of this
Speaker 1: year and be safe.
Speaker 2: Peace and love on earth and more. May all your
Speaker 2: wishes be granted, unless they're evil. Hug your siblings or
Speaker 2: your parents, or whoever you're with this holiday extra tight
Speaker 2: and tell them you love them.
Speaker 1: Thank you, Mi,