1 00:00:00,040 --> 00:00:02,320 Tori Dunlap: Welcome back to She Pivots. I'm Tori Dunlap. 2 00:00:12,080 --> 00:00:15,600 ETS: Welcome back to She Pivots, the podcast where we talk 3 00:00:15,680 --> 00:00:18,280 ETS: with women who dare to pivot out of one career 4 00:00:18,640 --> 00:00:22,919 ETS: and into something new and explore how their personal lives 5 00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:32,680 ETS: impacts these decisions. I'm your host Emily Tish Sussman. On 6 00:00:32,720 --> 00:00:37,880 ETS: this episode, the Queen of personal finance, Tory Dunlap, joins 7 00:00:37,960 --> 00:00:40,400 ETS: us to talk about how she went from a traditional 8 00:00:40,479 --> 00:00:45,199 ETS: corporate career to founding one of the largest financial education 9 00:00:45,360 --> 00:00:49,640 ETS: platforms out there. Tori is the founder and CEO of 10 00:00:49,720 --> 00:00:52,920 ETS: her first one hundred K, author of the New York 11 00:00:52,960 --> 00:00:56,440 ETS: Times best selling book Financial Feminist, and host of her 12 00:00:56,440 --> 00:01:01,280 ETS: successful podcast, also called Financial Feminist. I first met Tory 13 00:01:01,320 --> 00:01:03,520 ETS: when I was an editor at Marie Clair and hosting 14 00:01:03,560 --> 00:01:06,440 ETS: the weekly business show Getting Down to Business, where I 15 00:01:06,480 --> 00:01:09,640 ETS: interviewed women about the nitty gritty behind their career success. 16 00:01:10,240 --> 00:01:12,560 ETS: Her story stuck out to me because she came to 17 00:01:12,600 --> 00:01:15,560 ETS: this calling after Trump was first elected in twenty sixteen, 18 00:01:15,959 --> 00:01:18,120 ETS: something I see as a pivot point for many women 19 00:01:18,160 --> 00:01:21,080 ETS: that I talked to. It was then that she realized 20 00:01:21,080 --> 00:01:25,120 ETS: that money equaled power and freedom, especially for women, so 21 00:01:25,160 --> 00:01:27,760 ETS: she set out to save one hundred K before she 22 00:01:27,800 --> 00:01:30,760 ETS: turned twenty five, and started blogging about it as a 23 00:01:30,800 --> 00:01:33,200 ETS: way to show women everywhere that they could do it too. 24 00:01:34,000 --> 00:01:36,240 ETS: Before she knew it, she had a real business on 25 00:01:36,280 --> 00:01:39,319 ETS: her hands and decided to quit her day job, making 26 00:01:39,360 --> 00:01:44,160 ETS: a scary, but ultimately rewarding pivot. Since then, she's helped 27 00:01:44,280 --> 00:01:47,880 ETS: millions of women take control of their money, whether it's 28 00:01:47,960 --> 00:01:52,720 ETS: negotiating a raise, paying off debt, or building wealth. Tory's 29 00:01:52,760 --> 00:01:56,560 ETS: mission is simple to give women the tools they need 30 00:01:56,640 --> 00:02:00,760 ETS: to own their financial futures. She's been featured in The 31 00:02:00,760 --> 00:02:04,360 ETS: New York Times, Forbes, and Good Morning America, to name 32 00:02:04,400 --> 00:02:08,120 ETS: a few. This season, after working on the Harris Walls 33 00:02:08,160 --> 00:02:11,959 ETS: presidential campaign, I've been thinking about things through the lens 34 00:02:11,960 --> 00:02:14,359 ETS: of how each of us can have a unique impact 35 00:02:14,440 --> 00:02:18,120 ETS: outside of politics, and I love what Tory is doing. 36 00:02:18,720 --> 00:02:21,760 ETS: When women have financial freedom, it doesn't just help us 37 00:02:21,800 --> 00:02:24,840 ETS: pivot in our own careers, it gives us the power 38 00:02:24,919 --> 00:02:27,560 ETS: to make real change in our lives, our communities, and 39 00:02:27,600 --> 00:02:30,840 ETS: the world around us. I'm so excited for you to 40 00:02:30,880 --> 00:02:33,280 ETS: hear Tory's story. Let's jump right in. 41 00:02:37,720 --> 00:02:39,480 Tori Dunlap: My name is Tory Dunlap. I am the founder of 42 00:02:39,520 --> 00:02:41,480 Tori Dunlap: for first hundred K, which is money and career platform 43 00:02:41,520 --> 00:02:43,160 Tori Dunlap: for women. I believe I was put on this earth 44 00:02:43,240 --> 00:02:44,960 Tori Dunlap: to fight for women's financial rights. 45 00:02:45,320 --> 00:02:47,720 ETS: Okay, so we're going to back it up. What was 46 00:02:47,800 --> 00:02:50,760 ETS: life like for young Tory? Like, where were you in 47 00:02:50,800 --> 00:02:53,639 ETS: the birth order? What was it like where you grew up. 48 00:02:54,360 --> 00:02:56,600 ETS: I am the eldest and the youngest in the middle. 49 00:02:56,600 --> 00:02:58,240 ETS: Because I'm an only child. 50 00:02:58,639 --> 00:03:02,960 Tori Dunlap: I have major I think oldly child syndrome, both in 51 00:03:03,000 --> 00:03:04,680 Tori Dunlap: all of the good ways and all the bad ways. 52 00:03:04,720 --> 00:03:08,399 Tori Dunlap: But yeah, I am an only child. Yeah it's been 53 00:03:09,040 --> 00:03:11,640 Tori Dunlap: great having all of the attention and terrible having all 54 00:03:11,720 --> 00:03:15,440 Tori Dunlap: the attention. But yeah, I grew up the only child 55 00:03:15,600 --> 00:03:18,160 Tori Dunlap: of two parents who are still together and still live 56 00:03:18,160 --> 00:03:20,040 Tori Dunlap: in the same house I grew up in like they 57 00:03:20,040 --> 00:03:22,799 Tori Dunlap: have not moved since I was born thirty years ago. 58 00:03:23,440 --> 00:03:29,560 Tori Dunlap: I was immediately the artistic kid, dance, acting, music. I 59 00:03:29,639 --> 00:03:32,680 Tori Dunlap: started piano at five. I was singing before I could talk, 60 00:03:33,160 --> 00:03:35,280 Tori Dunlap: and that's what I thought my life was going to be. 61 00:03:35,880 --> 00:03:39,920 Tori Dunlap: I got to college majored in communications, which I loved 62 00:03:39,960 --> 00:03:44,680 Tori Dunlap: and still loved, but that was my like almost apology major. 63 00:03:44,800 --> 00:03:48,000 Tori Dunlap: It was like the thing that was doing all of 64 00:03:48,040 --> 00:03:49,880 Tori Dunlap: the things I loved about theater, but in a way 65 00:03:49,880 --> 00:03:52,120 Tori Dunlap: that I could actually make money, you know, the storytelling 66 00:03:52,160 --> 00:03:54,840 Tori Dunlap: and the talking to people. And then I also majored 67 00:03:54,880 --> 00:03:57,800 Tori Dunlap: in theater, and I wanted that to be my life. 68 00:03:58,160 --> 00:04:01,800 Tori Dunlap: But I also was super practical, and I had parents 69 00:04:01,880 --> 00:04:05,440 Tori Dunlap: who gave me the incredible gift of a lot of learnings, 70 00:04:05,440 --> 00:04:08,480 Tori Dunlap: but a financial education and a lot of conversations about money. 71 00:04:08,880 --> 00:04:11,440 Tori Dunlap: And so I remember talking in high school and then 72 00:04:11,480 --> 00:04:14,200 Tori Dunlap: in college about like, Okay, are you going to pursue 73 00:04:14,480 --> 00:04:17,680 Tori Dunlap: acting professionally? And for me the entire time, it was 74 00:04:17,720 --> 00:04:21,040 Tori Dunlap: just very obvious that that was not the life I 75 00:04:21,160 --> 00:04:22,960 Tori Dunlap: was going or not the path I was going to take. 76 00:04:23,040 --> 00:04:25,279 Tori Dunlap: I think I deeply wanted it. There's times I still 77 00:04:25,320 --> 00:04:29,320 Tori Dunlap: want it, but the practical side of me was like, Okay, 78 00:04:29,560 --> 00:04:32,840 Tori Dunlap: we have to pay rent, we have to make sure 79 00:04:32,880 --> 00:04:34,839 Tori Dunlap: that we have enough money to do the things we 80 00:04:34,880 --> 00:04:37,880 Tori Dunlap: want to do. And I don't think I wanted that 81 00:04:38,000 --> 00:04:41,039 Tori Dunlap: struggle that so many of my incredibly talented friends have, 82 00:04:41,760 --> 00:04:44,679 Tori Dunlap: where it's like auditioning day in and day out, working 83 00:04:44,839 --> 00:04:48,000 Tori Dunlap: three jobs just so you can try to pursue this dream. 84 00:04:48,080 --> 00:04:51,680 Tori Dunlap: And I didn't want that. Did you ever audition as 85 00:04:51,720 --> 00:04:55,760 Tori Dunlap: a kid All the time I was doing two shows 86 00:04:55,800 --> 00:04:59,880 Tori Dunlap: a year on camera work, like I had an agent 87 00:05:00,200 --> 00:05:03,160 Tori Dunlap: when I was like five, but it was not it 88 00:05:03,240 --> 00:05:07,039 Tori Dunlap: was like the reasonable stuff. It wasn't the dance mom, 89 00:05:07,160 --> 00:05:10,640 Tori Dunlap: pageant mom stuff. I was like, yeah, I don't think 90 00:05:10,680 --> 00:05:13,240 Tori Dunlap: I ever landed like a national commercial. But I was 91 00:05:13,279 --> 00:05:16,479 Tori Dunlap: doing some on camera work. But theater was really where 92 00:05:16,480 --> 00:05:18,440 Tori Dunlap: I love to be. So I was doing community theater, 93 00:05:18,880 --> 00:05:21,240 Tori Dunlap: you know, sound of Music when I was thirteen, and 94 00:05:21,279 --> 00:05:25,160 Tori Dunlap: then every play slash musical offered in high school and 95 00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:29,240 Tori Dunlap: then obviously you know, beyond that into college. So there 96 00:05:29,320 --> 00:05:32,039 Tori Dunlap: was a lot of you know, my heart is with theater, 97 00:05:32,120 --> 00:05:33,839 Tori Dunlap: and that's one of the reasons I love chatting with 98 00:05:33,920 --> 00:05:36,120 Tori Dunlap: you is figuring out, you know, what show are we 99 00:05:36,160 --> 00:05:37,880 Tori Dunlap: seeing on Broadway? And every time I'm in New York, 100 00:05:37,880 --> 00:05:39,520 Tori Dunlap: it's like, how many shows can I see in my 101 00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:43,200 Tori Dunlap: three days? And it's the answer is usually three. So yeah, 102 00:05:43,200 --> 00:05:45,120 Tori Dunlap: that is that is my love, and that is what 103 00:05:45,200 --> 00:05:47,760 Tori Dunlap: I thought when I was little. That's what I thought 104 00:05:47,800 --> 00:05:49,039 Tori Dunlap: I was going to do with my life. 105 00:05:50,640 --> 00:05:54,160 ETS: In addition to her love of theater, Torri also became 106 00:05:54,520 --> 00:05:58,200 ETS: one of the youngest business owners I've ever met after 107 00:05:58,240 --> 00:06:00,760 ETS: her dad helped her stand up and run a mini 108 00:06:00,880 --> 00:06:02,440 ETS: vending machine Empire. 109 00:06:03,800 --> 00:06:06,640 Tori Dunlap: I've had a very unique experience, which was I started 110 00:06:06,680 --> 00:06:08,480 Tori Dunlap: my first business when I was nine years old. So 111 00:06:08,640 --> 00:06:11,240 Tori Dunlap: I owned vending machines, the kind where you put a 112 00:06:11,279 --> 00:06:12,760 Tori Dunlap: quarter and you get a handful of candy out, like 113 00:06:12,760 --> 00:06:15,120 Tori Dunlap: gumball machines. I bought my first one when I was 114 00:06:15,200 --> 00:06:17,080 Tori Dunlap: nine on a loan from my dad that I did 115 00:06:17,080 --> 00:06:19,440 Tori Dunlap: pay back took me two years. I still remember it 116 00:06:19,440 --> 00:06:21,200 Tori Dunlap: like it was yesterday. I was like home from school, 117 00:06:21,600 --> 00:06:23,840 Tori Dunlap: sitting on the floor of our family room, and he 118 00:06:23,920 --> 00:06:25,680 Tori Dunlap: like brought in this machine and was like, do you 119 00:06:25,680 --> 00:06:27,279 Tori Dunlap: want to start a business? And nine year old me, 120 00:06:27,279 --> 00:06:30,880 Tori Dunlap: who's like precocious as hell and very ambitious, is like, yeah, sure. 121 00:06:31,320 --> 00:06:34,719 Tori Dunlap: And that was not yeah, it was not part of 122 00:06:34,760 --> 00:06:37,640 Tori Dunlap: the plan. But I learned everything about how to run 123 00:06:37,640 --> 00:06:40,400 Tori Dunlap: a business. Now. I didn't start anything brand new. I 124 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:42,600 Tori Dunlap: didn't invent anything. I didn't go on Shark Tank, right, 125 00:06:42,640 --> 00:06:46,159 Tori Dunlap: but like I learned profit and loss, I learned I 126 00:06:46,200 --> 00:06:48,200 Tori Dunlap: opened my first bank account when I was nine, and 127 00:06:48,240 --> 00:06:53,560 Tori Dunlap: I was signing checks by ten, Like I knew how to, 128 00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:58,279 Tori Dunlap: you know, manage money. I knew how to run a 129 00:06:58,320 --> 00:07:00,640 Tori Dunlap: pretty basic business but still a bit business. And I 130 00:07:00,680 --> 00:07:03,000 Tori Dunlap: also understood how to pitch myself, and I was learning 131 00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:05,320 Tori Dunlap: that through theater, but I was also learning that through 132 00:07:05,320 --> 00:07:08,400 Tori Dunlap: this entrepreneurship experience. I was learning how to he or 133 00:07:08,520 --> 00:07:10,760 Tori Dunlap: no and be okay with that, and how to get 134 00:07:10,840 --> 00:07:12,960 Tori Dunlap: up and keep going. There was plenty of people who 135 00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:15,320 Tori Dunlap: told me, no, you cute twelve year old kid, you 136 00:07:15,320 --> 00:07:17,800 Tori Dunlap: can't stop your machine here, but I love that for you, 137 00:07:18,400 --> 00:07:20,440 Tori Dunlap: or plenty of people who said, no, you don't get 138 00:07:20,480 --> 00:07:22,800 Tori Dunlap: this part, even though you auditioned four times. And so 139 00:07:23,280 --> 00:07:26,320 Tori Dunlap: I think that was super crucial again to the success 140 00:07:26,360 --> 00:07:28,960 Tori Dunlap: I have now. It's just like hearing no, pitching yourself, 141 00:07:29,000 --> 00:07:31,760 Tori Dunlap: being okay, not taking it personally. Like There's so many 142 00:07:31,840 --> 00:07:35,800 Tori Dunlap: things that happened that, you know, really helped me manage money, 143 00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:38,040 Tori Dunlap: help me learn how to do that, but also was 144 00:07:38,080 --> 00:07:40,280 Tori Dunlap: just a great bonding experience for me and my dad. 145 00:07:40,360 --> 00:07:42,920 Tori Dunlap: We went out, you know, one Saturday a month for 146 00:07:43,080 --> 00:07:47,480 Tori Dunlap: ten years together and stocked the machines, and then by 147 00:07:47,760 --> 00:07:50,480 Tori Dunlap: the end of high school, I had fifteen machines with 148 00:07:50,560 --> 00:07:53,400 Tori Dunlap: all the money going into my college fund. And then 149 00:07:53,440 --> 00:07:57,720 Tori Dunlap: after eleven years, so about halfway through college, I think 150 00:07:57,760 --> 00:07:59,880 Tori Dunlap: my junior year, I sold that business to a t 151 00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:01,880 Tori Dunlap: and year old who also happens to be a named Tory. 152 00:08:02,160 --> 00:08:04,200 Tori Dunlap: And if I look back on that, that was the 153 00:08:04,200 --> 00:08:06,440 Tori Dunlap: first taste of what I have now, which is like 154 00:08:06,560 --> 00:08:11,360 Tori Dunlap: the entrepreneurship, the financial independence, the teaching women. And I 155 00:08:11,400 --> 00:08:15,720 Tori Dunlap: think that a lot of those experiences were very instrumental 156 00:08:15,760 --> 00:08:18,200 Tori Dunlap: in me doing the career I have now. It was 157 00:08:18,240 --> 00:08:20,800 Tori Dunlap: a really really great gift my parents gave me. And 158 00:08:20,880 --> 00:08:23,400 Tori Dunlap: I knew that wasn't normal, and I knew, you know, 159 00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:27,080 Tori Dunlap: that kids weren't having venue machine businesses. But I did 160 00:08:27,120 --> 00:08:30,480 Tori Dunlap: think that the financial education was normal. I thought that 161 00:08:30,520 --> 00:08:33,200 Tori Dunlap: everybody knew how to save. I thought that everybody knew 162 00:08:33,400 --> 00:08:35,960 Tori Dunlap: how to manage a credit card responsibly. And so then 163 00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:39,080 Tori Dunlap: when I got to college and started having conversations of like, oh, 164 00:08:39,160 --> 00:08:41,480 Tori Dunlap: how much does college cost? How can we afford this? 165 00:08:41,880 --> 00:08:44,760 Tori Dunlap: I started realizing, Oh, this financial education I had for 166 00:08:44,880 --> 00:08:46,240 Tori Dunlap: my parents was a privilege. 167 00:08:46,760 --> 00:08:49,400 ETS: Can you talk a little bit more about what, like, 168 00:08:49,480 --> 00:08:52,800 ETS: what was that financial education that your parents gave you? Like, 169 00:08:52,880 --> 00:08:55,440 ETS: what kind of conversations was it. Did you guys like 170 00:08:55,480 --> 00:08:58,480 ETS: sit down and have structured time to talk about the 171 00:08:58,520 --> 00:09:00,520 ETS: next phase of a business? Did you sit down and 172 00:09:00,559 --> 00:09:03,360 ETS: talk about your savings or was it sort of something 173 00:09:03,360 --> 00:09:05,400 ETS: that you did like they did. They talk about their 174 00:09:05,400 --> 00:09:06,480 ETS: own finances. 175 00:09:07,280 --> 00:09:09,640 Tori Dunlap: One and this is my biggest tip to parents is 176 00:09:09,760 --> 00:09:12,240 Tori Dunlap: they didn't just talk to me. They showed me. And 177 00:09:12,280 --> 00:09:14,880 Tori Dunlap: I know that sounds obvious, but there's a lot of parents. 178 00:09:14,880 --> 00:09:17,200 Tori Dunlap: We get so many questions now from parents of like, 179 00:09:17,200 --> 00:09:19,960 Tori Dunlap: how do I know teach my kids to be financially responsible. 180 00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:23,880 Tori Dunlap: There's so many parents I think who well intentionally say, oh, well, 181 00:09:23,880 --> 00:09:25,560 Tori Dunlap: you need to save money, or you can't buy something 182 00:09:25,559 --> 00:09:29,080 Tori Dunlap: if you can't afford it. But then you see, you know, 183 00:09:29,120 --> 00:09:31,800 Tori Dunlap: the kids, see them putting their credit card down for 184 00:09:31,840 --> 00:09:35,040 Tori Dunlap: everything knowing they can't afford it, or having this really 185 00:09:35,080 --> 00:09:38,240 Tori Dunlap: you know, harmful relationship with money. But I saw them 186 00:09:38,840 --> 00:09:42,560 Tori Dunlap: talk about like very value based spending and that's still 187 00:09:42,600 --> 00:09:45,559 Tori Dunlap: something I teach. But we still went on a family 188 00:09:45,600 --> 00:09:48,560 Tori Dunlap: trip every single year. Yet there were things that we 189 00:09:48,600 --> 00:09:51,199 Tori Dunlap: didn't do in order to afford that trip. And so 190 00:09:51,240 --> 00:09:54,120 Tori Dunlap: they were talking about, like, we really value experiences, we 191 00:09:54,160 --> 00:09:56,080 Tori Dunlap: really value travel, we want to do that with you, 192 00:09:56,240 --> 00:09:57,560 Tori Dunlap: So we're not going to go out to eat all 193 00:09:57,600 --> 00:10:01,080 Tori Dunlap: the time. And really, look back, I think going out 194 00:10:01,120 --> 00:10:03,760 Tori Dunlap: to eat, especially at like a nice restaurant, was not 195 00:10:03,800 --> 00:10:06,520 Tori Dunlap: a Tuesday. It was like special occation. It was birthday, 196 00:10:06,679 --> 00:10:09,480 Tori Dunlap: Christmas like that was kind of it. And so I 197 00:10:09,520 --> 00:10:11,760 Tori Dunlap: think that that was one really great thing my parents 198 00:10:11,760 --> 00:10:14,480 Tori Dunlap: did was not just talking to talk about walking the 199 00:10:14,480 --> 00:10:17,880 Tori Dunlap: walk and also demonstrating, hey, we're not doing this so 200 00:10:17,920 --> 00:10:20,960 Tori Dunlap: that we can do this, We're not having this thing 201 00:10:21,280 --> 00:10:24,240 Tori Dunlap: so that we can have this other thing. I think 202 00:10:24,880 --> 00:10:29,040 Tori Dunlap: the second thing that was really impactful was you were asking, 203 00:10:29,080 --> 00:10:30,640 Tori Dunlap: you know, did they sit down and be like, this 204 00:10:30,679 --> 00:10:33,679 Tori Dunlap: is dedicated time to have conversations. I still remember getting 205 00:10:33,679 --> 00:10:36,440 Tori Dunlap: my first paychecks and that was a dedicated, sit down 206 00:10:36,480 --> 00:10:39,120 Tori Dunlap: conversation where they're like, Okay, so this is how much 207 00:10:39,160 --> 00:10:42,040 Tori Dunlap: you're getting paid. This is your houry late rate, and 208 00:10:42,080 --> 00:10:44,720 Tori Dunlap: this is you know what it equates to for your 209 00:10:44,760 --> 00:10:48,360 Tori Dunlap: pay period. This is what taxes are, and this is 210 00:10:48,400 --> 00:10:50,760 Tori Dunlap: what's happening when they take taxes out. Because I remember 211 00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:53,200 Tori Dunlap: getting my first paycheck and being like, wait, all this 212 00:10:53,280 --> 00:10:56,559 Tori Dunlap: money's not mine and just that blowing my mind and 213 00:10:56,640 --> 00:11:01,560 Tori Dunlap: so yeah, I understanding that, but then also understanding like, okay, 214 00:11:01,640 --> 00:11:03,360 Tori Dunlap: so you have this amount of money left over, what 215 00:11:03,400 --> 00:11:05,240 Tori Dunlap: are you going to do with it? And I was 216 00:11:05,240 --> 00:11:08,000 Tori Dunlap: actually thinking about this the other day. I don't I 217 00:11:08,040 --> 00:11:10,560 Tori Dunlap: didn't really spend a lot of my money in high school, 218 00:11:10,760 --> 00:11:14,520 Tori Dunlap: Like it all went to savings because my parents had, 219 00:11:14,640 --> 00:11:17,480 Tori Dunlap: you know, told me this mindset of like, hey, you're working, 220 00:11:17,559 --> 00:11:19,880 Tori Dunlap: so you can save money. That is the primary goal. 221 00:11:20,280 --> 00:11:23,679 Tori Dunlap: Spending's the secondary goal. So I was putting almost all 222 00:11:23,679 --> 00:11:27,280 Tori Dunlap: of my money into my college savings. And then when 223 00:11:27,280 --> 00:11:31,880 Tori Dunlap: I was in college, I remember graduating and then sitting down, 224 00:11:32,040 --> 00:11:34,600 Tori Dunlap: I still have it somewhere. My parents had me write 225 00:11:34,600 --> 00:11:37,760 Tori Dunlap: out what everything might cost, So what my average rent 226 00:11:37,840 --> 00:11:40,439 Tori Dunlap: might be, what my phone bill was going to cost, 227 00:11:40,679 --> 00:11:43,360 Tori Dunlap: what the electricity bill was, you know, all of these 228 00:11:43,480 --> 00:11:45,320 Tori Dunlap: new adult things that I was going to have to 229 00:11:45,559 --> 00:11:49,120 Tori Dunlap: completely pay for. And they were like, so that job 230 00:11:49,120 --> 00:11:52,840 Tori Dunlap: you got offered that's thirty thousand dollars a year is 231 00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:56,200 Tori Dunlap: probably not going to cover your basic expenses, and especially 232 00:11:56,200 --> 00:11:58,520 Tori Dunlap: not if you want to save money. And just doing 233 00:11:58,559 --> 00:12:01,680 Tori Dunlap: that again sounds so well, but I don't think most 234 00:12:02,040 --> 00:12:05,120 Tori Dunlap: my parents are doing this with their kids. Like that 235 00:12:05,280 --> 00:12:07,640 Tori Dunlap: was so helpful for me to be able to see like, 236 00:12:07,880 --> 00:12:10,440 Tori Dunlap: this is how much things cost one, but also two, 237 00:12:10,679 --> 00:12:12,480 Tori Dunlap: this is how much I'm going to need to make 238 00:12:12,920 --> 00:12:15,440 Tori Dunlap: in order to afford my life and in order to 239 00:12:15,440 --> 00:12:18,400 Tori Dunlap: hopefully save to get financially ahead. I want to acknowledge 240 00:12:18,400 --> 00:12:21,360 Tori Dunlap: too that I graduated without student debt per first hundred k. 241 00:12:21,480 --> 00:12:23,480 Tori Dunlap: You know my company is, and I'm sure we'll get 242 00:12:23,480 --> 00:12:26,959 Tori Dunlap: into it, but kind of it was built on or 243 00:12:27,160 --> 00:12:29,640 Tori Dunlap: the name came after I saved my own one hundred 244 00:12:29,679 --> 00:12:31,800 Tori Dunlap: k at twenty five, and I would not have been 245 00:12:31,800 --> 00:12:34,760 Tori Dunlap: able to do that had I not graduated debt free, 246 00:12:34,800 --> 00:12:37,480 Tori Dunlap: So it wouldn't have happened as quickly as it happened, 247 00:12:37,880 --> 00:12:42,080 Tori Dunlap: And that is privilege definitely. My parents worked really hard. 248 00:12:42,120 --> 00:12:44,559 Tori Dunlap: They only had one kid to save for, but they 249 00:12:44,559 --> 00:12:47,320 Tori Dunlap: helped contribute to my college fund. But I also was 250 00:12:47,320 --> 00:12:50,079 Tori Dunlap: working those jobs. And we sat down every single semester 251 00:12:50,160 --> 00:12:53,120 Tori Dunlap: before the semester happened and we had a collective conversation 252 00:12:53,160 --> 00:12:55,199 Tori Dunlap: and said, Okay, how are we going to afford this? 253 00:12:55,640 --> 00:12:57,560 Tori Dunlap: And my parents said, hey, we have this much money 254 00:12:57,559 --> 00:12:59,840 Tori Dunlap: to put up for you this semester. How much money 255 00:13:00,080 --> 00:13:02,160 Tori Dunlap: do you have this semester? How much money are you 256 00:13:02,240 --> 00:13:04,320 Tori Dunlap: going to make? How much money did you make last year? 257 00:13:04,640 --> 00:13:07,720 Tori Dunlap: And so that was a collaborative conversation we had. And 258 00:13:07,800 --> 00:13:09,679 Tori Dunlap: I remember I think it was my senior year, or 259 00:13:09,720 --> 00:13:13,000 Tori Dunlap: maybe my junior year before senior year, being like, Okay, 260 00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:16,080 Tori Dunlap: we have this amount of money and I think we 261 00:13:16,120 --> 00:13:18,439 Tori Dunlap: can squeak by. And I think we just had a 262 00:13:18,520 --> 00:13:20,760 Tori Dunlap: little bit of money left over after senior year to 263 00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:23,480 Tori Dunlap: be like, Okay, we did it. We graduated debt free 264 00:13:23,559 --> 00:13:27,200 Tori Dunlap: and so that was a huge benefit and a huge 265 00:13:27,800 --> 00:13:29,240 Tori Dunlap: leg up for me financially. 266 00:13:30,080 --> 00:13:32,880 ETS: And then you went on to work in marketing. So 267 00:13:33,040 --> 00:13:36,079 ETS: because you had had all of these conversations, did that 268 00:13:36,160 --> 00:13:37,760 ETS: put did you feel like it put like an extra 269 00:13:37,800 --> 00:13:39,800 ETS: pressure on you to choose something that was going to 270 00:13:39,880 --> 00:13:41,040 ETS: be your career forever. 271 00:13:41,960 --> 00:13:45,720 Tori Dunlap: Yeah. I remember going in the guidance counselor before I 272 00:13:46,040 --> 00:13:48,719 Tori Dunlap: committed what university I was going to, and I was like, 273 00:13:48,760 --> 00:13:50,280 Tori Dunlap: I really want a major in theater and my parents 274 00:13:50,280 --> 00:13:53,320 Tori Dunlap: were like, no, You're not majoring just in theater. And 275 00:13:53,360 --> 00:13:56,160 Tori Dunlap: then I discovered that I could do you know, basically 276 00:13:56,240 --> 00:13:58,520 Tori Dunlap: marketing with less math, which is a calm degree, and 277 00:13:58,559 --> 00:14:01,640 Tori Dunlap: then theater with no extra charge. And I was like boom, okay, 278 00:14:01,679 --> 00:14:05,000 Tori Dunlap: we're double majoring. And so yeah, I think that for 279 00:14:05,040 --> 00:14:07,200 Tori Dunlap: me getting into my career in marketing. I actually really 280 00:14:07,240 --> 00:14:09,680 Tori Dunlap: loved it. And I think I loved it because, like 281 00:14:09,720 --> 00:14:13,079 Tori Dunlap: I said before, it was like scratching the itch of theater, 282 00:14:13,280 --> 00:14:16,120 Tori Dunlap: but in a quote unquote more practical way, more corporate way. 283 00:14:16,400 --> 00:14:18,240 Tori Dunlap: So I was getting to storytell, I was getting to 284 00:14:18,280 --> 00:14:20,600 Tori Dunlap: be around people, I was getting to write, I was 285 00:14:20,600 --> 00:14:23,640 Tori Dunlap: getting to strategically plan, and that was one of my 286 00:14:23,640 --> 00:14:27,360 Tori Dunlap: favorite parts of acting, was like the table reads and 287 00:14:27,440 --> 00:14:30,080 Tori Dunlap: the like character work before I even got on stage. 288 00:14:30,480 --> 00:14:32,760 Tori Dunlap: And so a lot of I think marketing, especially like 289 00:14:32,800 --> 00:14:35,120 Tori Dunlap: marketing planning, is that I was like, how do we 290 00:14:35,720 --> 00:14:38,160 Tori Dunlap: you know, what's the go to market strategy around this thing. 291 00:14:38,720 --> 00:14:41,560 Tori Dunlap: So I started my career in social media and was 292 00:14:41,600 --> 00:14:44,440 Tori Dunlap: doing social media marketing, and pretty much every job I 293 00:14:44,520 --> 00:14:48,000 Tori Dunlap: had until I became my own boss full time was 294 00:14:48,040 --> 00:14:51,280 Tori Dunlap: like the team of one marketer at a company. So 295 00:14:51,360 --> 00:14:54,800 Tori Dunlap: it was like social media primarily, but a lot of 296 00:14:54,840 --> 00:14:59,720 Tori Dunlap: other different things like content and sometimes PR and communications, 297 00:15:00,080 --> 00:15:03,120 Tori Dunlap: and there was a lot of you know stuff that 298 00:15:03,200 --> 00:15:06,640 Tori Dunlap: went into like just the social media marketing title. So yeah, 299 00:15:06,680 --> 00:15:10,760 Tori Dunlap: my first job, I was the only marketing person for 300 00:15:10,840 --> 00:15:14,960 Tori Dunlap: a company of five thousand people, and at twenty two, 301 00:15:15,320 --> 00:15:18,960 Tori Dunlap: like had a manager title, and so that was a 302 00:15:18,960 --> 00:15:22,840 Tori Dunlap: great experience and also very daunting. And yeah, I thought 303 00:15:22,840 --> 00:15:24,640 Tori Dunlap: I was going to be like VP of marketing by 304 00:15:24,680 --> 00:15:26,920 Tori Dunlap: thirty because I'm a very goal oriented person. I was 305 00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:29,120 Tori Dunlap: going to like climb the corporate ladder and girl boss 306 00:15:29,200 --> 00:15:31,480 Tori Dunlap: my way through the city and like have my coffee 307 00:15:31,480 --> 00:15:33,440 Tori Dunlap: and my briefcase and my pencil skirt. And that's how 308 00:15:33,440 --> 00:15:35,120 Tori Dunlap: I know it's a fucking fantasy, is I don't wear 309 00:15:35,160 --> 00:15:37,000 Tori Dunlap: pencil skirts and never have and they're uncomfortable and I 310 00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:39,680 Tori Dunlap: hate them. And like that's what I thought I was 311 00:15:39,720 --> 00:15:44,080 Tori Dunlap: going to do. And then the work environment, like my 312 00:15:44,560 --> 00:15:47,520 Tori Dunlap: rose colored goggles came off. I realized I was working 313 00:15:47,560 --> 00:15:52,680 Tori Dunlap: at an extremely toxic sexist company. I was getting weird, 314 00:15:53,360 --> 00:15:56,240 Tori Dunlap: sexual inappropriate things said to me at work. I was 315 00:15:56,280 --> 00:15:59,680 Tori Dunlap: watching my friends who were women at the company or 316 00:15:59,800 --> 00:16:03,920 Tori Dunlap: when of color, getting like passed over for opportunities. And 317 00:16:04,480 --> 00:16:08,840 Tori Dunlap: of course the election happens, and I'm twenty two, and 318 00:16:08,880 --> 00:16:11,680 Tori Dunlap: I'm thinking I'm coming to adulthood but really into womanhood 319 00:16:11,680 --> 00:16:13,600 Tori Dunlap: in a country with our first female president, And of 320 00:16:13,680 --> 00:16:16,360 Tori Dunlap: course it's not what happens, and fucking still has not happened, 321 00:16:16,400 --> 00:16:19,960 Tori Dunlap: and so I'm just like, uh, okay, what kind of 322 00:16:19,960 --> 00:16:21,440 Tori Dunlap: person am I going to be? Like what do I 323 00:16:21,480 --> 00:16:25,200 Tori Dunlap: stand for? And it really radicalized me, and I started 324 00:16:25,480 --> 00:16:29,640 Tori Dunlap: realizing that when I had money, I had options when 325 00:16:29,680 --> 00:16:32,720 Tori Dunlap: I had money and I'm not talking Bezos money, I'm 326 00:16:32,760 --> 00:16:36,000 Tori Dunlap: just talking like enough money to make my own decisions. 327 00:16:36,760 --> 00:16:40,520 Tori Dunlap: I could leave toxic situations I didn't want to be 328 00:16:40,560 --> 00:16:42,680 Tori Dunlap: in anymore because that first job I couldn't leave because 329 00:16:42,680 --> 00:16:44,720 Tori Dunlap: I didn't have enough money. I didn't have enough money saved. 330 00:16:44,720 --> 00:16:47,400 Tori Dunlap: I didn't have another job lined up. So I could 331 00:16:47,480 --> 00:16:51,720 Tori Dunlap: leave bad situations. I could start a business. I could 332 00:16:51,880 --> 00:16:54,280 Tori Dunlap: donate to causes I believed in. I could go to therapy. 333 00:16:54,600 --> 00:16:58,200 Tori Dunlap: I could afford a nicer apartment. Like every option opened 334 00:16:58,240 --> 00:17:00,800 Tori Dunlap: up to me when I had money. And through conversations 335 00:17:00,840 --> 00:17:02,840 Tori Dunlap: with my friends who were then coming to me for 336 00:17:02,880 --> 00:17:05,080 Tori Dunlap: financial advice, they were like what's a roth ira? And 337 00:17:05,119 --> 00:17:06,560 Tori Dunlap: like how do I get out of debt? And all 338 00:17:06,600 --> 00:17:09,960 Tori Dunlap: of that, I realized maybe this was the answer, Maybe 339 00:17:10,040 --> 00:17:12,760 Tori Dunlap: this was the way I can make an impact. And 340 00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:15,199 Tori Dunlap: the more research I did and the more experiences I 341 00:17:15,240 --> 00:17:16,880 Tori Dunlap: had in my life through the next couple of years 342 00:17:16,880 --> 00:17:20,119 Tori Dunlap: of corporate I was like, Oh, a financial education is 343 00:17:20,160 --> 00:17:22,840 Tori Dunlap: our best form of protest, Like in a world that 344 00:17:22,920 --> 00:17:27,800 Tori Dunlap: constantly does enfranchises women and any other marginalized group, having 345 00:17:28,040 --> 00:17:32,440 Tori Dunlap: the financial education, having the again ability to choose your 346 00:17:32,520 --> 00:17:36,359 Tori Dunlap: life and to have options and flexibility and freedom like 347 00:17:36,560 --> 00:17:38,560 Tori Dunlap: that is the feeling I want for every single woman, 348 00:17:38,960 --> 00:17:42,600 Tori Dunlap: And so that is kind of what led to her 349 00:17:42,600 --> 00:17:45,480 Tori Dunlap: first hunder k and then eventually me taking that business 350 00:17:45,520 --> 00:17:45,960 Tori Dunlap: full time. 351 00:17:48,080 --> 00:17:50,880 ETS: Saving one hundred K by twenty five is no joke, 352 00:17:51,400 --> 00:17:54,919 ETS: so I had to know how the numbers worked. After 353 00:17:54,960 --> 00:17:58,880 ETS: the break, Tory tells us exactly how she saved her 354 00:17:58,960 --> 00:18:02,920 ETS: first one hundred k. Then later we learn how she 355 00:18:03,080 --> 00:18:06,800 ETS: pivoted and turned it all into a multimillion dollar business. 356 00:18:07,400 --> 00:18:08,080 ETS: Stay tuned. 357 00:18:18,920 --> 00:18:22,879 Tori Dunlap: So I was doing her first hundred K savings and 358 00:18:22,920 --> 00:18:26,159 Tori Dunlap: actually like publicly announcing it as like a side hustle. 359 00:18:26,200 --> 00:18:29,080 Tori Dunlap: So this was twenty eighteen. I had run a blog 360 00:18:29,160 --> 00:18:31,160 Tori Dunlap: since twenty sixteen. It was like a blog for twenty 361 00:18:31,200 --> 00:18:33,520 Tori Dunlap: something women because it was like classic Tumblr era, you know. 362 00:18:33,760 --> 00:18:36,280 Tori Dunlap: And I was talking about career and money and travel 363 00:18:36,320 --> 00:18:38,360 Tori Dunlap: and all those things. But then I realized that everything 364 00:18:38,359 --> 00:18:40,480 Tori Dunlap: I was talking about was through the lens of money. 365 00:18:40,480 --> 00:18:42,560 Tori Dunlap: So yeah, I'd talk about travel, but I talk about 366 00:18:42,560 --> 00:18:45,560 Tori Dunlap: like how I negotiated you know, this rate down, or 367 00:18:45,680 --> 00:18:48,000 Tori Dunlap: like how I scored this flight deal or whatever, and 368 00:18:48,080 --> 00:18:51,080 Tori Dunlap: so and again, more research, more people coming to me, 369 00:18:51,080 --> 00:18:53,720 Tori Dunlap: me realizing in my own life oh, I'm able to 370 00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:57,160 Tori Dunlap: leave this really, really toxic boss without another job lined 371 00:18:57,240 --> 00:19:00,280 Tori Dunlap: up because I have an emergency fund. And wow, what 372 00:19:00,400 --> 00:19:04,560 Tori Dunlap: flexibility is that? And what is this beautiful feeling I have? 373 00:19:04,760 --> 00:19:07,640 Tori Dunlap: And that was the realization of like, oh, I think 374 00:19:07,680 --> 00:19:10,720 Tori Dunlap: I want to do this work. So twenty eighteen, twenty nineteen, 375 00:19:10,720 --> 00:19:12,639 Tori Dunlap: I rebranded to her First hundred K and that is 376 00:19:12,640 --> 00:19:15,720 Tori Dunlap: when I declared my her first hundred K goal publicly, 377 00:19:15,760 --> 00:19:19,320 Tori Dunlap: which was I was attempting to save slash invest one 378 00:19:19,359 --> 00:19:21,840 Tori Dunlap: hundred k before I turned twenty six. And that was 379 00:19:21,840 --> 00:19:23,200 Tori Dunlap: the joke is as long as I did it the 380 00:19:23,240 --> 00:19:25,639 Tori Dunlap: day before I turned twenty six and still counted. So 381 00:19:25,840 --> 00:19:27,920 Tori Dunlap: the one hundred k was a couple of things. One privilege, 382 00:19:27,920 --> 00:19:30,840 Tori Dunlap: I always want to acknowledge that I'm assist gender white woman. 383 00:19:31,160 --> 00:19:34,359 Tori Dunlap: I also again graduated without student debts, so I had 384 00:19:34,359 --> 00:19:36,439 Tori Dunlap: a leg up there. The second thing was that I 385 00:19:36,520 --> 00:19:39,280 Tori Dunlap: was saving a portion of my take home pay every 386 00:19:39,320 --> 00:19:41,120 Tori Dunlap: time I got paid, and I think at the peak 387 00:19:41,119 --> 00:19:42,960 Tori Dunlap: of that, I was saving twenty seven percent of my 388 00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:45,520 Tori Dunlap: take home pay. Now people hear that and they think, oh, 389 00:19:45,560 --> 00:19:48,280 Tori Dunlap: you didn't do anything fun. Now. I still traveled internationally, 390 00:19:48,400 --> 00:19:50,040 Tori Dunlap: I still went out to eat, I just got really 391 00:19:50,080 --> 00:19:52,119 Tori Dunlap: clear on and this is my third tip, like what 392 00:19:52,200 --> 00:19:55,920 Tori Dunlap: I actually valued. So I valued travel, I valued food. 393 00:19:56,359 --> 00:19:58,600 Tori Dunlap: There were other things I didn't value as much. I 394 00:19:58,640 --> 00:20:01,840 Tori Dunlap: hardly ever bought a coffee because I just that was 395 00:20:01,880 --> 00:20:03,800 Tori Dunlap: not where I wanted to spend my money. And so 396 00:20:04,000 --> 00:20:05,960 Tori Dunlap: I got really really clear on what I wanted to 397 00:20:06,000 --> 00:20:08,080 Tori Dunlap: spend my money on, what brought me the most joy, 398 00:20:08,400 --> 00:20:10,879 Tori Dunlap: and then didn't really spend on things that I didn't 399 00:20:10,960 --> 00:20:14,000 Tori Dunlap: love or that you didn't make my life better. I 400 00:20:14,040 --> 00:20:16,439 Tori Dunlap: started investing really early. I was twenty two when I 401 00:20:16,480 --> 00:20:18,320 Tori Dunlap: opened up my roth Ira, and I worked to max 402 00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:21,800 Tori Dunlap: it out every single year. So I was not only 403 00:20:22,160 --> 00:20:25,800 Tori Dunlap: saving and investing, but also I was allowing my money 404 00:20:25,800 --> 00:20:27,520 Tori Dunlap: to work harder for me in the stock market. So 405 00:20:27,560 --> 00:20:30,119 Tori Dunlap: it helped me hit that one hundred k quicker because 406 00:20:30,119 --> 00:20:32,000 Tori Dunlap: when I put money in right, I was making the 407 00:20:32,040 --> 00:20:35,600 Tori Dunlap: compound interest gains on that too. I also negotiated every 408 00:20:35,600 --> 00:20:38,000 Tori Dunlap: single job I had, and I did not stay in 409 00:20:38,040 --> 00:20:42,399 Tori Dunlap: a job for longer than I felt respected. So the 410 00:20:42,440 --> 00:20:44,760 Tori Dunlap: moment I was like, I don't think I am getting 411 00:20:44,760 --> 00:20:47,199 Tori Dunlap: compensated fairly, or I think it's time to move on 412 00:20:48,040 --> 00:20:51,760 Tori Dunlap: was when I was strategically pivoting every single time, going like, Okay, 413 00:20:51,840 --> 00:20:55,160 Tori Dunlap: I'm going to find another job. I'm going to negotiate 414 00:20:55,160 --> 00:20:57,560 Tori Dunlap: that salary even more so, I don't think I stayed 415 00:20:57,560 --> 00:21:01,720 Tori Dunlap: at a job longer than two years. And we've talked 416 00:21:01,720 --> 00:21:03,680 Tori Dunlap: a lot at her first hundred K. And I'm sure 417 00:21:03,720 --> 00:21:05,680 Tori Dunlap: you have two about like job hopping, and I put 418 00:21:05,680 --> 00:21:08,800 Tori Dunlap: that in quotes, but like the negatives around job hopping 419 00:21:08,840 --> 00:21:10,560 Tori Dunlap: is not really a thing anymore, Like if you want 420 00:21:10,560 --> 00:21:13,720 Tori Dunlap: to leverage your salary, if you want to make sure 421 00:21:13,760 --> 00:21:17,480 Tori Dunlap: you're compensated fairly, like not staying at a role that 422 00:21:17,520 --> 00:21:20,000 Tori Dunlap: you don't feel fairly compensated in, even if it's only 423 00:21:20,080 --> 00:21:23,200 Tori Dunlap: been two years, Like that's a myth that I think 424 00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:26,160 Tori Dunlap: needs to die, and needs to die really hard. You're 425 00:21:26,160 --> 00:21:28,879 Tori Dunlap: allowed to switch jobs. It doesn't show that you like 426 00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:32,199 Tori Dunlap: can't keep a job. It's more about making sure that 427 00:21:32,240 --> 00:21:34,880 Tori Dunlap: you're family compensated to whatever role you're at. So, yeah, 428 00:21:34,920 --> 00:21:36,760 Tori Dunlap: I was doing these things of making more money and 429 00:21:36,760 --> 00:21:40,040 Tori Dunlap: then being able to save more or investing to allow 430 00:21:40,040 --> 00:21:42,280 Tori Dunlap: my money to work harder for me. And really the 431 00:21:42,400 --> 00:21:45,200 Tori Dunlap: hundred K was not about having one hundred thousand dollars 432 00:21:45,200 --> 00:21:47,840 Tori Dunlap: in my bank account, like that was fun it was 433 00:21:47,880 --> 00:21:51,320 Tori Dunlap: cool to see, you know, that six figure number, but 434 00:21:51,440 --> 00:21:56,760 Tori Dunlap: it was what that money meant. And this is something 435 00:21:56,800 --> 00:21:58,560 Tori Dunlap: we talk about in our work all the time, is 436 00:21:58,560 --> 00:22:01,399 Tori Dunlap: that money is not about math. It's not about numbers 437 00:22:01,440 --> 00:22:03,320 Tori Dunlap: people think it is. It's about like how good you 438 00:22:03,359 --> 00:22:05,680 Tori Dunlap: are with math, and it's like, I'm majored in theater, y'all, 439 00:22:05,800 --> 00:22:09,840 Tori Dunlap: Like I I'm not good with math. It's not about numbers. 440 00:22:09,920 --> 00:22:12,320 Tori Dunlap: It's about psychology, and it's about motivating you, just like 441 00:22:12,400 --> 00:22:15,199 Tori Dunlap: any other goal, to achieve it. And so the one 442 00:22:15,240 --> 00:22:17,080 Tori Dunlap: hundred k was not about one hundred k. It was 443 00:22:17,119 --> 00:22:19,840 Tori Dunlap: about me being able to quit my job and me 444 00:22:19,920 --> 00:22:21,800 Tori Dunlap: being able to take her first hunder k full time. 445 00:22:22,080 --> 00:22:24,240 Tori Dunlap: So in the midst of my own saving journey, the 446 00:22:24,280 --> 00:22:27,040 Tori Dunlap: company was also blowing up. Twenty nineteen, we got a 447 00:22:27,160 --> 00:22:30,080 Tori Dunlap: bunch of incredible press. Market Watch was like our first 448 00:22:30,080 --> 00:22:33,119 Tori Dunlap: big piece, which is you know, very like your dad 449 00:22:33,280 --> 00:22:35,880 Tori Dunlap: who's fifty five years old named Steve like reads it. 450 00:22:36,400 --> 00:22:38,600 Tori Dunlap: And I had my fun little turning point where the 451 00:22:38,640 --> 00:22:41,840 Tori Dunlap: comment section was just a mess of people being like 452 00:22:41,960 --> 00:22:43,960 Tori Dunlap: she said, it's just gendered, and so I'm not going 453 00:22:44,040 --> 00:22:46,359 Tori Dunlap: to read or like she said, the word privilege and 454 00:22:46,440 --> 00:22:48,920 Tori Dunlap: it's just had this beautiful moment of twenty four year 455 00:22:48,920 --> 00:22:51,600 Tori Dunlap: old me deciding was I going to try to be 456 00:22:51,680 --> 00:22:54,280 Tori Dunlap: for everybody or was I going to focus on the 457 00:22:54,320 --> 00:22:56,720 Tori Dunlap: people that I knew or I could really help, which 458 00:22:56,760 --> 00:22:59,760 Tori Dunlap: is women who are talking about how money affects women 459 00:22:59,760 --> 00:23:02,520 Tori Dunlap: different and women who do care to talk about systemic 460 00:23:02,560 --> 00:23:06,000 Tori Dunlap: oppression in regards to personal finance. And so that was 461 00:23:06,600 --> 00:23:08,880 Tori Dunlap: a turning point for me where I was like, Okay, yeah, 462 00:23:08,960 --> 00:23:11,040 Tori Dunlap: we're going to double down and sorry Steve if you 463 00:23:11,080 --> 00:23:13,359 Tori Dunlap: hate it, but this is what we're doing. It was, 464 00:23:13,440 --> 00:23:17,560 Tori Dunlap: you know, CNBC, and the big one was Good Morning America. 465 00:23:17,840 --> 00:23:19,880 Tori Dunlap: So I was on Good Morning America for the first 466 00:23:19,920 --> 00:23:22,680 Tori Dunlap: time when I hit my hundred k goal. So I 467 00:23:22,760 --> 00:23:24,520 Tori Dunlap: hit my one hundred k goal when I was twenty 468 00:23:24,520 --> 00:23:27,960 Tori Dunlap: five years and like three months old. I went to 469 00:23:27,960 --> 00:23:30,280 Tori Dunlap: Europe to celebrate with my best friend and got the 470 00:23:30,280 --> 00:23:32,240 Tori Dunlap: call for Good Morning America in a pub in London, 471 00:23:32,520 --> 00:23:34,720 Tori Dunlap: came home, did the interview. 472 00:23:36,640 --> 00:23:39,439 ETS: Tory Dunlap set an ambitious goal for herself when she 473 00:23:39,560 --> 00:23:42,920 ETS: was right out of college. Saved one hundred thousand dollars 474 00:23:43,000 --> 00:23:45,920 ETS: in three years by the time she was twenty five. 475 00:23:46,200 --> 00:23:49,400 Tori Dunlap: I crunched the numbers, did some math and realized that 476 00:23:49,400 --> 00:23:50,600 Tori Dunlap: that might be possible for me. 477 00:23:50,800 --> 00:23:53,800 ETS: Dunlap hit her goal months before herself in post deadline, 478 00:23:53,800 --> 00:23:54,280 ETS: I read. 479 00:23:54,119 --> 00:23:57,160 Tori Dunlap: An article about someone saving one hundred K at twenty 480 00:23:57,200 --> 00:23:59,320 Tori Dunlap: five and I was probably twenty one or twenty two 481 00:23:59,320 --> 00:24:02,800 Tori Dunlap: when I read the article, and I crunched the numbers, 482 00:24:02,800 --> 00:24:05,120 Tori Dunlap: did some math, and realized that that might be possible 483 00:24:05,119 --> 00:24:05,359 Tori Dunlap: for me. 484 00:24:05,560 --> 00:24:08,640 ETS: Done Lap hit her goal months before herself imposed deadline. 485 00:24:08,800 --> 00:24:12,120 Tori Dunlap: I really focused on priority based spending, so figuring out 486 00:24:12,160 --> 00:24:15,520 Tori Dunlap: what your priorities are in life, what really brings you joy. 487 00:24:15,600 --> 00:24:17,960 Tori Dunlap: So my lovely friend says, you can afford anything, you 488 00:24:18,040 --> 00:24:19,280 Tori Dunlap: just can't afford everything. 489 00:24:21,240 --> 00:24:23,440 ETS: You may have noticed that Torri did the Good Morning 490 00:24:23,480 --> 00:24:28,119 ETS: America interview remotely, and it wasn't because of COVID. In fact, 491 00:24:28,520 --> 00:24:32,800 ETS: her corporate job wasn't too pleased with her new fan success. 492 00:24:33,359 --> 00:24:37,240 Tori Dunlap: But things got really squarely at work and my boss 493 00:24:37,359 --> 00:24:40,840 Tori Dunlap: was super supportive, but the other co founders were not 494 00:24:41,119 --> 00:24:44,800 Tori Dunlap: so much and thought that I had stolen their pr 495 00:24:44,960 --> 00:24:49,280 Tori Dunlap: company to get this opportunity, and like, none of that happened. 496 00:24:49,840 --> 00:24:53,240 Tori Dunlap: And at that point I was actually trying to stay 497 00:24:53,280 --> 00:24:57,680 Tori Dunlap: longer because this is the fun thing about about growing 498 00:24:57,760 --> 00:25:01,959 Tori Dunlap: up financially educated. Is that My parents, well meaning, were like, 499 00:25:02,080 --> 00:25:04,120 Tori Dunlap: do you keep a job? No matter what. You get 500 00:25:04,119 --> 00:25:06,479 Tori Dunlap: your four own K, you get your health insurance, you're 501 00:25:06,520 --> 00:25:08,960 Tori Dunlap: not quitting. You're not quitting your job. You have to stay. 502 00:25:09,600 --> 00:25:13,359 Tori Dunlap: And I was actually planning on staying even after my 503 00:25:13,359 --> 00:25:14,920 Tori Dunlap: one hundred K. I was like, Okay, I'll do six 504 00:25:14,960 --> 00:25:17,240 Tori Dunlap: more months because I was just so afraid of going 505 00:25:17,280 --> 00:25:18,880 Tori Dunlap: out on my own. It felt like such a risk. 506 00:25:19,640 --> 00:25:23,040 Tori Dunlap: And my direct boss, after things got really really squarely 507 00:25:23,320 --> 00:25:25,159 Tori Dunlap: and not great, he sat down with me and we 508 00:25:25,160 --> 00:25:27,560 Tori Dunlap: had a very honest conversation, and I'm very grateful for it. 509 00:25:27,600 --> 00:25:30,920 Tori Dunlap: He was like, entrepreneur to entrepreneur, you have a thriving business, 510 00:25:31,160 --> 00:25:34,680 Tori Dunlap: you have money in the bank, you're making money in 511 00:25:34,840 --> 00:25:38,800 Tori Dunlap: your side hustle. Quit. Yeah, I think it's time. And 512 00:25:38,960 --> 00:25:40,879 Tori Dunlap: it was also very obvious to us that we were 513 00:25:40,920 --> 00:25:43,359 Tori Dunlap: not going to be able to repair this relationship with 514 00:25:43,400 --> 00:25:46,600 Tori Dunlap: the other people at the company, and so quit my 515 00:25:46,680 --> 00:25:50,640 Tori Dunlap: job three weeks after Good Morning to America. And now 516 00:25:50,680 --> 00:25:53,080 Tori Dunlap: my life could not be more different. We have helped 517 00:25:53,240 --> 00:25:57,240 Tori Dunlap: five million women save money, payoff debts, start investing, start businesses. 518 00:25:57,600 --> 00:26:00,840 Tori Dunlap: We've helped them feel financially confident to help them feel 519 00:26:01,000 --> 00:26:03,520 Tori Dunlap: like they have self worth in every aspect of their lives. 520 00:26:03,800 --> 00:26:06,080 Tori Dunlap: I have a New York Times bestselling book called Financial Feminist. 521 00:26:06,119 --> 00:26:07,800 Tori Dunlap: We have the number one money podcast for women in 522 00:26:07,840 --> 00:26:11,280 Tori Dunlap: the world called Financial Feminist. And this is just my 523 00:26:11,280 --> 00:26:13,080 Tori Dunlap: favorite thing to do in the world. And if you 524 00:26:13,119 --> 00:26:17,679 Tori Dunlap: would have told me eighteen twenty two that this is 525 00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:20,320 Tori Dunlap: going to be my path four year old me, who 526 00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:22,960 Tori Dunlap: you know is singing and dancing into two two, that hey, 527 00:26:22,960 --> 00:26:26,000 Tori Dunlap: you're going to educate women about personal finance, I would 528 00:26:26,040 --> 00:26:28,199 Tori Dunlap: have laughed to you. This was not the plan. But 529 00:26:28,800 --> 00:26:31,760 Tori Dunlap: this is my favorite thing to do. And the coolest 530 00:26:31,800 --> 00:26:34,960 Tori Dunlap: thing is we can directly see its impact every single 531 00:26:34,960 --> 00:26:39,040 Tori Dunlap: fucking day. And yeah, it's just very different than what 532 00:26:39,080 --> 00:26:41,760 Tori Dunlap: I ever thought you would be doing, but also very 533 00:26:41,800 --> 00:26:45,400 Tori Dunlap: aligned because I just love when women always, I love 534 00:26:45,440 --> 00:26:50,160 Tori Dunlap: when women succeed it. Nothing makes me as emotional as 535 00:26:50,760 --> 00:26:53,320 Tori Dunlap: women standing in their power and being the fullest, best, 536 00:26:53,359 --> 00:26:57,240 Tori Dunlap: baddest version of themselves. And that is what I have 537 00:26:57,400 --> 00:27:00,280 Tori Dunlap: become and continue to work to become, and is what 538 00:27:00,320 --> 00:27:03,280 Tori Dunlap: we help women become too. Getting better with money is 539 00:27:03,320 --> 00:27:05,560 Tori Dunlap: a twenty twenty five goal. Well, great, you're in the 540 00:27:05,600 --> 00:27:07,240 Tori Dunlap: right place. Hi. My name is Torri. 541 00:27:07,400 --> 00:27:09,880 Tori Dunlap: I have helped over five million women save money, pay 542 00:27:09,920 --> 00:27:11,960 Tori Dunlap: off debt, start investing, and start businesses. 543 00:27:12,119 --> 00:27:13,800 Tori Dunlap: I'm gonna want to hear this, but you need to. 544 00:27:14,600 --> 00:27:18,480 Tori Dunlap: A financial education is your best form of protest in 545 00:27:18,480 --> 00:27:22,159 Tori Dunlap: a society and in a system that constantly disenfranchises you. 546 00:27:23,119 --> 00:27:27,080 Tori Dunlap: Having money, which really means having options, is the way 547 00:27:27,080 --> 00:27:30,280 Tori Dunlap: that anybody gets ahead in life, especially if you're a 548 00:27:30,320 --> 00:27:32,840 Tori Dunlap: member of a marginalized I'm so excited to do this 549 00:27:32,920 --> 00:27:35,000 Tori Dunlap: free live workshop for you all called the Seven Day 550 00:27:35,000 --> 00:27:38,600 Tori Dunlap: Money Reset. It is step by step tips, strategies, techniques 551 00:27:38,640 --> 00:27:41,359 Tori Dunlap: for seven days to get you off on the right foot. 552 00:27:41,080 --> 00:27:43,600 Tori Dunlap: For twenty twenty five. So a seven day plan for you. 553 00:27:44,240 --> 00:27:47,359 ETS: Can you explain as a business model to me? Like 554 00:27:47,359 --> 00:27:50,960 ETS: when he said, like when your boss at the time 555 00:27:51,080 --> 00:27:54,600 ETS: said to you, you have a business and it's making money. 556 00:27:55,160 --> 00:27:57,479 ETS: How was it making money? Like, did you have a 557 00:27:57,480 --> 00:28:00,240 ETS: business model from the minute you started having in come 558 00:28:00,280 --> 00:28:00,560 ETS: in it. 559 00:28:01,200 --> 00:28:04,760 Tori Dunlap: I started first again as that blog, and it was 560 00:28:04,800 --> 00:28:08,320 Tori Dunlap: like my creative outlet. It was like my you know, 561 00:28:08,359 --> 00:28:09,960 Tori Dunlap: I was reading all of the blogs. I have so 562 00:28:10,040 --> 00:28:12,480 Tori Dunlap: many friends now friends, but people you know, who I 563 00:28:12,520 --> 00:28:14,879 Tori Dunlap: was reading who I was inspired by or it was 564 00:28:14,960 --> 00:28:17,879 Tori Dunlap: you know, like the seven things you should ask at 565 00:28:17,880 --> 00:28:19,320 Tori Dunlap: the end of a job interview. You know. It was 566 00:28:19,359 --> 00:28:23,440 Tori Dunlap: like those kind of those kind of posts. And then 567 00:28:23,960 --> 00:28:26,880 Tori Dunlap: I thought, Okay, maybe I can monetize this blog, like 568 00:28:27,000 --> 00:28:30,040 Tori Dunlap: through ads or through sponsored posts. But I was not 569 00:28:30,520 --> 00:28:34,120 Tori Dunlap: the blog didn't have enough numbers for that. And as 570 00:28:34,160 --> 00:28:37,840 Tori Dunlap: I started progressing in my career, and then also again realized, okay, 571 00:28:37,880 --> 00:28:40,240 Tori Dunlap: I think I really want to dial in on personal finance. 572 00:28:40,800 --> 00:28:43,600 Tori Dunlap: Then it was financial coaching, and that was the first 573 00:28:43,600 --> 00:28:46,280 Tori Dunlap: big profitable thing, and the end of twenty eighteen into 574 00:28:46,320 --> 00:28:50,240 Tori Dunlap: twenty nineteen, I charged my special was forty seven dollars 575 00:28:50,280 --> 00:28:52,640 Tori Dunlap: an hour, and I would either meet with you over 576 00:28:52,680 --> 00:28:54,640 Tori Dunlap: the phone or we'd go to like a coffee shop 577 00:28:54,680 --> 00:28:57,000 Tori Dunlap: in Seattle, and I would look at your money, and 578 00:28:57,560 --> 00:28:59,560 Tori Dunlap: you know, we would work together to figure out a plan. 579 00:29:00,280 --> 00:29:01,960 Tori Dunlap: In those early days, it was just like one session 580 00:29:01,960 --> 00:29:04,040 Tori Dunlap: and you could buy more if you wanted. Then I 581 00:29:04,080 --> 00:29:06,640 Tori Dunlap: got smarter and started selling like three packs, five packs. 582 00:29:06,720 --> 00:29:09,720 Tori Dunlap: Then I raised my rates. Then I realized, Okay, this 583 00:29:09,800 --> 00:29:12,800 Tori Dunlap: is no longer sustainable to do like one off coaching, 584 00:29:12,880 --> 00:29:15,720 Tori Dunlap: so then I moved it to a workshop. So I 585 00:29:15,760 --> 00:29:18,800 Tori Dunlap: think twenty nineteen was the time where I was still 586 00:29:18,800 --> 00:29:23,080 Tori Dunlap: doing coaching, and then I was selling like digital download products. 587 00:29:23,320 --> 00:29:26,640 Tori Dunlap: So I had my coaching that was like the premium product, 588 00:29:26,680 --> 00:29:28,600 Tori Dunlap: and I think premium was, you know, like ninety seven 589 00:29:28,640 --> 00:29:31,479 Tori Dunlap: an hour with my and my time. And then we 590 00:29:31,520 --> 00:29:34,600 Tori Dunlap: had like a resume template that I created off my 591 00:29:34,640 --> 00:29:37,239 Tori Dunlap: own resume, but would teach you how to you know, 592 00:29:37,280 --> 00:29:39,920 Tori Dunlap: here's where you talk about your experience in this way, 593 00:29:40,200 --> 00:29:42,560 Tori Dunlap: so you could buy that I think for like fifteen dollars. 594 00:29:42,600 --> 00:29:45,080 Tori Dunlap: So that was where the business was making money. And 595 00:29:45,120 --> 00:29:47,960 Tori Dunlap: then every press hit I got brought more business. Every 596 00:29:48,040 --> 00:29:51,640 Tori Dunlap: social media follower I got obviously brought more business. So 597 00:29:52,160 --> 00:29:55,080 Tori Dunlap: I think when I quit in I could probably tell 598 00:29:55,080 --> 00:29:58,280 Tori Dunlap: you with screenshots in like that October November of twenty nineteen, 599 00:29:58,720 --> 00:30:02,080 Tori Dunlap: I had probably ten thousand and followers on Instagram, maybe 600 00:30:02,120 --> 00:30:05,000 Tori Dunlap: like twelve thousand followers. I couldn't tell you exactly how 601 00:30:05,080 --> 00:30:06,800 Tori Dunlap: much money I was making, but I remember I was 602 00:30:06,840 --> 00:30:10,440 Tori Dunlap: making you know, as much, if not sometimes more a 603 00:30:10,480 --> 00:30:12,880 Tori Dunlap: month than I was making in my marketing job, which 604 00:30:12,920 --> 00:30:15,600 Tori Dunlap: was paying before taxes, like seventy seven thousand a year. 605 00:30:15,960 --> 00:30:18,680 Tori Dunlap: And then I was realizing that, oh, if I'm getting 606 00:30:18,680 --> 00:30:22,520 Tori Dunlap: this much done doing this part time, imagine what I 607 00:30:22,520 --> 00:30:24,920 Tori Dunlap: could do if I'm doing this full time, like this 608 00:30:24,960 --> 00:30:27,240 Tori Dunlap: is enough money, that this is money that I'm making 609 00:30:27,640 --> 00:30:29,920 Tori Dunlap: just on the side as a side hustle. What if 610 00:30:29,960 --> 00:30:31,840 Tori Dunlap: I do have the time to dedicate to this fully. 611 00:30:32,280 --> 00:30:34,440 Tori Dunlap: I also again realized, okay, I can't do this one 612 00:30:34,480 --> 00:30:37,360 Tori Dunlap: on one coaching thing forever, and so I started phasing 613 00:30:37,360 --> 00:30:40,800 Tori Dunlap: that out and doing a workshop that is now actually 614 00:30:41,280 --> 00:30:43,239 Tori Dunlap: it turned into a course then, so it was like 615 00:30:43,440 --> 00:30:46,360 Tori Dunlap: I was getting more and more removed from it on purpose, 616 00:30:46,440 --> 00:30:48,240 Tori Dunlap: so it was less and less of my active time. 617 00:30:48,280 --> 00:30:50,200 Tori Dunlap: It was coaching and then a workshop and then a course, 618 00:30:50,440 --> 00:30:52,240 Tori Dunlap: and then a huge chunk of that course actually became 619 00:30:52,320 --> 00:30:55,920 Tori Dunlap: my book. But over a couple of years. So twenty twenty, 620 00:30:56,320 --> 00:30:59,400 Tori Dunlap: I worked with a friend who is a positive psychology coach, 621 00:30:59,400 --> 00:31:02,120 Tori Dunlap: and we loved lunched like our first course, and it 622 00:31:02,240 --> 00:31:04,840 Tori Dunlap: was called Master Money, and we sold it I think 623 00:31:04,880 --> 00:31:07,440 Tori Dunlap: for like five days into the new year, and I 624 00:31:07,480 --> 00:31:10,160 Tori Dunlap: remember we made twenty two thousand dollars and we split 625 00:31:10,200 --> 00:31:13,000 Tori Dunlap: that in half, and I remember thinking, this is more 626 00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:15,440 Tori Dunlap: money than I've ever seen in my life, especially over like, 627 00:31:15,480 --> 00:31:18,200 Tori Dunlap: I just made this money in five days. And then 628 00:31:18,560 --> 00:31:20,600 Tori Dunlap: I think by March of twenty twenty, I had made 629 00:31:20,600 --> 00:31:23,960 Tori Dunlap: my entire corporate salary already, and I was like, Okay, 630 00:31:24,120 --> 00:31:26,200 Tori Dunlap: so we can do this. We can make this work. 631 00:31:26,360 --> 00:31:28,000 Tori Dunlap: And not only can it work, but I think it 632 00:31:28,040 --> 00:31:30,280 Tori Dunlap: can be really, really profitable. 633 00:31:32,080 --> 00:31:35,280 ETS: When we come back. Tory breaks down the highs and 634 00:31:35,400 --> 00:31:38,880 ETS: lows of going out on our own, from building during 635 00:31:38,880 --> 00:31:42,120 ETS: the height of COVID to learning that she couldn't plan 636 00:31:42,280 --> 00:31:43,000 ETS: for everything. 637 00:31:54,840 --> 00:31:57,520 Tori Dunlap: What were some of the anticipated challenges, did they. 638 00:31:57,480 --> 00:31:59,160 ETS: End up being what you thought they were going to be, 639 00:31:59,320 --> 00:32:02,680 ETS: and what were some of the real surprises anticipated challenges. 640 00:32:02,720 --> 00:32:04,720 Tori Dunlap: I'm actually going to tell you some challenges that or 641 00:32:04,800 --> 00:32:07,320 Tori Dunlap: I thought would be challenges but weren't. The first one 642 00:32:07,360 --> 00:32:09,600 Tori Dunlap: was I thought I was going to struggle to make money. 643 00:32:09,640 --> 00:32:11,880 Tori Dunlap: I thought it was going to be like really difficult 644 00:32:12,240 --> 00:32:15,240 Tori Dunlap: and ironically, and I'm so thankful for this because so 645 00:32:15,320 --> 00:32:19,920 Tori Dunlap: many businesses did not. We thrived in COVID because we 646 00:32:19,920 --> 00:32:22,720 Tori Dunlap: had a very lean business. We were talking about personal 647 00:32:22,720 --> 00:32:26,480 Tori Dunlap: finance education. TikTok really transformed our business. I made like 648 00:32:26,520 --> 00:32:28,800 Tori Dunlap: our first TikTok in July of twenty twenty and it 649 00:32:28,840 --> 00:32:31,320 Tori Dunlap: blew up and so we just I think it was 650 00:32:31,360 --> 00:32:33,920 Tori Dunlap: like very you know, I was very strategic. I think 651 00:32:33,960 --> 00:32:36,040 Tori Dunlap: I'm very smart, but it was also very much luck. 652 00:32:36,080 --> 00:32:38,720 Tori Dunlap: It was like right place, right time, so that I 653 00:32:38,800 --> 00:32:40,560 Tori Dunlap: just thought was going to be more of a struggle. 654 00:32:41,000 --> 00:32:44,560 Tori Dunlap: The other thing that I watched business after business do 655 00:32:44,720 --> 00:32:48,480 Tori Dunlap: because I was running marketing or involved in those decisions, 656 00:32:48,560 --> 00:32:50,560 Tori Dunlap: especially the last startup I worked out before I went 657 00:32:50,600 --> 00:32:54,440 Tori Dunlap: full time. They were one hundred percent reliant on like 658 00:32:54,560 --> 00:32:57,680 Tori Dunlap: paid marketing, so you know, the Facebook ads, the Instagram ads. 659 00:32:57,840 --> 00:33:02,600 Tori Dunlap: They basically built an entire business that crumbled if their 660 00:33:02,600 --> 00:33:06,360 Tori Dunlap: Facebook ads didn't perform. We only as a business at 661 00:33:06,360 --> 00:33:10,000 Tori Dunlap: her first owner k only started running ads like literally 662 00:33:10,040 --> 00:33:12,840 Tori Dunlap: three weeks ago. So in twenty twenty four we have 663 00:33:12,920 --> 00:33:17,320 Tori Dunlap: scaled to five million followers and multimillions in revenue with 664 00:33:17,560 --> 00:33:23,240 Tori Dunlap: no paid ads, no advertising, no loans, no like financing 665 00:33:23,280 --> 00:33:25,719 Tori Dunlap: from a rich uncle, like none of that. I started 666 00:33:25,760 --> 00:33:29,320 Tori Dunlap: with forty dollars in twenty sixteen when I signed up 667 00:33:29,320 --> 00:33:32,400 Tori Dunlap: for my domain and you know, signed up for my website. 668 00:33:32,440 --> 00:33:35,239 Tori Dunlap: Like that's truly the money we started with. And I 669 00:33:35,320 --> 00:33:37,320 Tori Dunlap: used my nine to five to kind of like fund 670 00:33:37,480 --> 00:33:41,560 Tori Dunlap: the business where I wasn't relying on my side hustle 671 00:33:41,600 --> 00:33:44,240 Tori Dunlap: to like pay for my expenses too early. So that's 672 00:33:44,240 --> 00:33:46,360 Tori Dunlap: something that I don't know if I thought it would 673 00:33:46,400 --> 00:33:48,920 Tori Dunlap: be a challenge, but I'm just really proud of is 674 00:33:48,920 --> 00:33:52,800 Tori Dunlap: that like we built it organically. We didn't take a 675 00:33:52,920 --> 00:33:55,680 Tori Dunlap: nique v see, like we did it on our own. 676 00:33:56,200 --> 00:34:01,080 Tori Dunlap: Oh God, what a challenge is So many is really hard. 677 00:34:01,520 --> 00:34:05,520 Tori Dunlap: Firing is really hard. I think managing my own time 678 00:34:05,920 --> 00:34:08,520 Tori Dunlap: is really hard. Managing my own ambition, I think is 679 00:34:08,600 --> 00:34:11,560 Tori Dunlap: the hardist because I want to go, go go all 680 00:34:11,600 --> 00:34:15,680 Tori Dunlap: the time, and I've learned I physically can't and I 681 00:34:15,760 --> 00:34:19,000 Tori Dunlap: emotionally can't. And I think, actually, I was just journaling 682 00:34:19,000 --> 00:34:20,759 Tori Dunlap: about this the other day, twenty twenty four is the 683 00:34:20,800 --> 00:34:23,799 Tori Dunlap: first year where I actually feel like I have the 684 00:34:23,880 --> 00:34:26,520 Tori Dunlap: harmony because I don't like saying balance in this case, 685 00:34:26,560 --> 00:34:29,200 Tori Dunlap: the harmony that does feel right of like caring about 686 00:34:29,200 --> 00:34:31,919 Tori Dunlap: the business enough but also not giving a shit about 687 00:34:31,920 --> 00:34:34,080 Tori Dunlap: the business at the same time, or at least giving 688 00:34:34,160 --> 00:34:38,400 Tori Dunlap: less shits, because that's healthy. I think that everything is 689 00:34:38,440 --> 00:34:41,680 Tori Dunlap: a challenge, And one of the things I see so 690 00:34:41,800 --> 00:34:44,239 Tori Dunlap: many women do who want to be entrepreneurs is they 691 00:34:44,239 --> 00:34:47,160 Tori Dunlap: think they have to have everything figured out before they 692 00:34:47,239 --> 00:34:49,160 Tori Dunlap: launch the business. They're like, Okay, I need the brand 693 00:34:49,200 --> 00:34:51,080 Tori Dunlap: color and I need the logo, and I need the website. 694 00:34:51,120 --> 00:34:53,200 Tori Dunlap: I need to have a five year business plan. You 695 00:34:53,320 --> 00:34:56,120 Tori Dunlap: do not know what the next five years are going 696 00:34:56,160 --> 00:34:58,759 Tori Dunlap: to look like. You can have a general idea, and 697 00:34:58,800 --> 00:35:01,960 Tori Dunlap: I think planning is great. That's good, that's healthy, but 698 00:35:02,120 --> 00:35:05,000 Tori Dunlap: you have to just get started. I learn how to 699 00:35:05,080 --> 00:35:08,400 Tori Dunlap: run this business by running this business. I don't learn 700 00:35:08,760 --> 00:35:12,400 Tori Dunlap: by saying, oh, I don't have enough information yet, so 701 00:35:12,480 --> 00:35:14,560 Tori Dunlap: I can't do it. I didn't know how to write 702 00:35:14,560 --> 00:35:16,120 Tori Dunlap: a book. I wrote a book. I didn't know how 703 00:35:16,160 --> 00:35:17,759 Tori Dunlap: to market a book. I marketed a book. I didn't 704 00:35:17,760 --> 00:35:19,800 Tori Dunlap: know how to launch a podcast. We launched a podcast. 705 00:35:19,840 --> 00:35:21,719 Tori Dunlap: Like all of these things. I don't know how to 706 00:35:21,719 --> 00:35:23,839 Tori Dunlap: be a CEO. No one sat me down. I didn't 707 00:35:23,840 --> 00:35:25,719 Tori Dunlap: go to I didn't get an MBA. No one sat 708 00:35:25,760 --> 00:35:28,200 Tori Dunlap: me down at CEO school and was like, here's exactly 709 00:35:28,200 --> 00:35:32,520 Tori Dunlap: like you learn by doing. And so there's so many challenges, 710 00:35:32,880 --> 00:35:36,480 Tori Dunlap: and there's often times where these challenges come up and 711 00:35:36,560 --> 00:35:38,879 Tori Dunlap: it feels like, oh my god, not again, Like oh 712 00:35:38,920 --> 00:35:41,040 Tori Dunlap: I thought we had overcome this, and I thought we 713 00:35:41,040 --> 00:35:43,600 Tori Dunlap: had gone past this, and like if there's a challenge, 714 00:35:43,600 --> 00:35:46,759 Tori Dunlap: that means something's wrong. And I just had this light 715 00:35:46,800 --> 00:35:48,640 Tori Dunlap: bulb moment late last year because we had a really 716 00:35:48,680 --> 00:35:53,000 Tori Dunlap: rough year with just like team dynamics and a lot 717 00:35:53,000 --> 00:35:56,319 Tori Dunlap: of changing like people coming in and people coming out, 718 00:35:56,360 --> 00:35:58,319 Tori Dunlap: and I was just like, oh my god, we're doing 719 00:35:58,320 --> 00:36:00,520 Tori Dunlap: this again, and that means we're doing something. I thought 720 00:36:00,520 --> 00:36:03,759 Tori Dunlap: we were preventing this. And it's like, you don't prevent challenges. 721 00:36:04,040 --> 00:36:07,800 Tori Dunlap: You can't because you don't have one hundred percent control. 722 00:36:08,320 --> 00:36:11,200 Tori Dunlap: Challenges come up all the time, and you have to 723 00:36:11,760 --> 00:36:14,600 Tori Dunlap: realize that it's not about preventing them because you can't. 724 00:36:15,040 --> 00:36:19,000 Tori Dunlap: It's about understanding what you need to do to move 725 00:36:19,040 --> 00:36:21,719 Tori Dunlap: through them. Does that make sense? Like, Yeah, I thought 726 00:36:21,719 --> 00:36:24,200 Tori Dunlap: it was about preventing it. You can't prevent it. It's 727 00:36:24,360 --> 00:36:27,160 Tori Dunlap: just knowing, Okay, I've been through this before. I'll get 728 00:36:27,200 --> 00:36:29,680 Tori Dunlap: through this again. Even if I've never done this, I 729 00:36:29,719 --> 00:36:33,600 Tori Dunlap: will navigate it. And I've navigated everything else and survived. 730 00:36:33,880 --> 00:36:36,640 Tori Dunlap: So it's about knowing that I have a plan and 731 00:36:36,680 --> 00:36:39,239 Tori Dunlap: that I'm going to stay calm and that everything will 732 00:36:39,280 --> 00:36:41,680 Tori Dunlap: work out eventually, even if it feels like everything's on 733 00:36:41,719 --> 00:36:43,399 Tori Dunlap: fire right now. Right. 734 00:36:43,440 --> 00:36:46,480 ETS: I think it's a lot about the mindset, about not 735 00:36:46,680 --> 00:36:51,080 ETS: being surprised or offended or knocked off when a challenge 736 00:36:51,120 --> 00:36:52,960 ETS: comes up and just say This is part of the process. 737 00:36:53,000 --> 00:36:54,560 ETS: This has to be part of our narrative of how 738 00:36:54,560 --> 00:36:57,200 ETS: we succeeded in the end that we weren't able to 739 00:36:58,200 --> 00:37:02,560 ETS: be able to have the growth or learnings without opposition 740 00:37:02,840 --> 00:37:05,239 ETS: and like learning how to get through it. So how 741 00:37:05,280 --> 00:37:07,719 ETS: do you define success for yourself at this point? How 742 00:37:07,760 --> 00:37:08,360 ETS: has it changed? 743 00:37:09,200 --> 00:37:11,800 Tori Dunlap: It used to be professional success, But as my mentor 744 00:37:11,960 --> 00:37:14,120 Tori Dunlap: and my second mom likes to tell me, you're a 745 00:37:14,200 --> 00:37:18,680 Tori Dunlap: human being, not a human doing, and so success for me, 746 00:37:19,239 --> 00:37:22,400 Tori Dunlap: actually I purposefully make it and have nothing to do 747 00:37:22,440 --> 00:37:26,360 Tori Dunlap: about my professional accomplishments. Success for me is am I 748 00:37:26,400 --> 00:37:30,160 Tori Dunlap: showing up as my most joyful self? Am I do 749 00:37:30,239 --> 00:37:33,600 Tori Dunlap: I like my life? Do I like my days? Am 750 00:37:33,600 --> 00:37:37,200 Tori Dunlap: I a nice, pleasant, kind person to be around? Do 751 00:37:37,280 --> 00:37:39,640 Tori Dunlap: I make the world a better place? That's success for 752 00:37:39,680 --> 00:37:40,440 Tori Dunlap: me at this point. 753 00:37:41,200 --> 00:37:43,960 ETS: Well, the point of this podcast is to bring in 754 00:37:44,000 --> 00:37:47,240 ETS: the intersection of the personal and the professional. And although 755 00:37:47,239 --> 00:37:50,839 ETS: you're quite candid about many aspects, I think, particularly about yourself, 756 00:37:51,560 --> 00:37:54,359 ETS: you do keep a lot of things quite private, particularly 757 00:37:54,480 --> 00:37:57,040 ETS: when it comes to the personal. So how would you 758 00:37:57,120 --> 00:37:59,920 ETS: say that the personal factors in your life have impact 759 00:38:00,040 --> 00:38:01,120 ETS: did your decision making? 760 00:38:01,960 --> 00:38:05,680 Tori Dunlap: I love that question, Emily. I think one. You learn 761 00:38:05,680 --> 00:38:10,480 Tori Dunlap: your boundaries sometimes because you crossed them and then you realize, oh, 762 00:38:10,520 --> 00:38:13,600 Tori Dunlap: that was a boundary. So one of the things that 763 00:38:14,000 --> 00:38:18,600 Tori Dunlap: I discovered through posting a lot of my life on 764 00:38:18,640 --> 00:38:21,840 Tori Dunlap: social media is that in twenty twenty, I was in 765 00:38:21,840 --> 00:38:25,320 Tori Dunlap: a relationship and posted about that relationship and that it ended, 766 00:38:25,880 --> 00:38:29,759 Tori Dunlap: and I haven't talked about it a lot, but I 767 00:38:29,760 --> 00:38:33,440 Tori Dunlap: had a really hard time moving forward from that relationship. 768 00:38:33,440 --> 00:38:39,600 Tori Dunlap: It took me two years and was a really really intense, 769 00:38:41,320 --> 00:38:46,959 Tori Dunlap: awful but also incredible grieving process, and I didn't want 770 00:38:47,000 --> 00:38:51,000 Tori Dunlap: to perform any of that publicly. And I also realized 771 00:38:51,080 --> 00:38:54,440 Tori Dunlap: that in talking about that relationship and it ending, I 772 00:38:54,520 --> 00:38:58,040 Tori Dunlap: was going to get well meaning but questions where is he? 773 00:38:58,360 --> 00:38:59,880 Tori Dunlap: How is he? I haven't seen him in a while, 774 00:39:00,239 --> 00:39:02,440 Tori Dunlap: and I am crying on the bathroom floor, and I 775 00:39:02,440 --> 00:39:05,040 Tori Dunlap: can't tell this person because he's not here anymore, like 776 00:39:05,320 --> 00:39:09,360 Tori Dunlap: I can't. I can't do that. And so that was 777 00:39:09,520 --> 00:39:14,040 Tori Dunlap: one thing that I have been very very steadfast in 778 00:39:14,840 --> 00:39:18,440 Tori Dunlap: is I have publicly said I'm in a relationship, but 779 00:39:18,520 --> 00:39:22,000 Tori Dunlap: I have not talked about who this person is. I 780 00:39:22,040 --> 00:39:24,879 Tori Dunlap: have not talked about their career or what they do. 781 00:39:25,400 --> 00:39:28,040 Tori Dunlap: Any photos I post, they're few and far between, and 782 00:39:28,080 --> 00:39:31,440 Tori Dunlap: they are the classic like I like, he's my child. 783 00:39:31,480 --> 00:39:34,239 Tori Dunlap: I put an emoji over his face, you know, like 784 00:39:34,320 --> 00:39:37,040 Tori Dunlap: I'm Kristen Bell or somebody like posting about my children, 785 00:39:37,480 --> 00:39:40,040 Tori Dunlap: but I'm That was just a huge thing for me 786 00:39:40,760 --> 00:39:44,880 Tori Dunlap: where that felt important for me to keep to myself. 787 00:39:45,440 --> 00:39:50,759 Tori Dunlap: And also, as my public persona has gotten bigger and 788 00:39:50,760 --> 00:39:55,880 Tori Dunlap: bigger and bigger, anybody that I am around has to 789 00:39:57,120 --> 00:40:00,200 Tori Dunlap: just be aware that we're Like I got recognized with 790 00:40:00,239 --> 00:40:02,960 Tori Dunlap: my now partner on our second date in public, and 791 00:40:03,160 --> 00:40:04,759 Tori Dunlap: he turned to me and he was like, does this 792 00:40:04,840 --> 00:40:06,719 Tori Dunlap: happen often? And I was like, okay, we have to 793 00:40:06,719 --> 00:40:11,280 Tori Dunlap: have a conversation now. Well, yeah, and especially in Seattle, 794 00:40:11,320 --> 00:40:13,640 Tori Dunlap: it happens basically every time I go out. So whether 795 00:40:13,680 --> 00:40:17,640 Tori Dunlap: it's grocery store or naked at the Korean Spa, all 796 00:40:17,680 --> 00:40:22,360 Tori Dunlap: of it's happened. So I set that boundary of even 797 00:40:22,440 --> 00:40:25,680 Tori Dunlap: before you know, we were more serious, I was like, 798 00:40:25,760 --> 00:40:28,279 Tori Dunlap: any person that I am involved with, I am not 799 00:40:28,520 --> 00:40:31,360 Tori Dunlap: going to talk about publicly. And I also need you 800 00:40:31,440 --> 00:40:33,520 Tori Dunlap: to tell me if this is ever uncomfortable for you, 801 00:40:33,560 --> 00:40:37,040 Tori Dunlap: because we either are going to navigate together or you 802 00:40:37,080 --> 00:40:38,480 Tori Dunlap: need to tell me that you don't want to do this. 803 00:40:39,160 --> 00:40:42,319 Tori Dunlap: So that was something that you know, has been so 804 00:40:43,120 --> 00:40:46,880 Tori Dunlap: fruitful in my life and feels sometimes weird to not 805 00:40:46,920 --> 00:40:49,359 Tori Dunlap: talk about, but also I don't want to talk about it. 806 00:40:51,040 --> 00:40:54,120 ETS: Tory has built an entire business off being open and 807 00:40:54,200 --> 00:40:58,040 ETS: honest about her finances, so I had to know was 808 00:40:58,080 --> 00:41:00,680 ETS: there a downside to sharing it so openly. 809 00:41:02,360 --> 00:41:04,200 Tori Dunlap: This is a very vulnerable thing to say it, but 810 00:41:04,239 --> 00:41:08,840 Tori Dunlap: I will say it. I am always worried that someone 811 00:41:09,360 --> 00:41:13,520 Tori Dunlap: because I'm so forth coming about how much money roughly 812 00:41:13,600 --> 00:41:17,719 Tori Dunlap: I have. People know I'm a multimillionaire. Right. A man 813 00:41:17,800 --> 00:41:19,680 Tori Dunlap: once on a date googled me in front of me. 814 00:41:19,800 --> 00:41:22,000 Tori Dunlap: Don't ever do that then, but googled me in front 815 00:41:22,040 --> 00:41:24,200 Tori Dunlap: of me and was like, holy shit, and like, you 816 00:41:24,400 --> 00:41:27,080 Tori Dunlap: know a lot of information very quickly that for an 817 00:41:27,080 --> 00:41:30,279 Tori Dunlap: average person you will not know. I worry that if 818 00:41:30,320 --> 00:41:32,200 Tori Dunlap: you invite me to your wedding, you're going to expect 819 00:41:32,280 --> 00:41:35,000 Tori Dunlap: a super expensive, lavish gift, and then you're going to 820 00:41:35,080 --> 00:41:38,520 Tori Dunlap: judge me if I don't. I worry that you expect 821 00:41:38,560 --> 00:41:40,600 Tori Dunlap: me to grab the bill every single time, and honestly 822 00:41:40,640 --> 00:41:43,080 Tori Dunlap: I usually do at the restaurant, but like that you're 823 00:41:43,120 --> 00:41:47,640 Tori Dunlap: judging me if I don't like those things. Are the 824 00:41:47,800 --> 00:41:51,200 Tori Dunlap: like very you know, quiet inner thoughts sometimes that I 825 00:41:51,239 --> 00:41:54,440 Tori Dunlap: try to remind myself are it's just the fear and 826 00:41:54,440 --> 00:41:58,400 Tori Dunlap: the shame and the scared little me. But that is 827 00:41:58,440 --> 00:42:01,920 Tori Dunlap: something that I do feel really nervous about sometimes that 828 00:42:01,960 --> 00:42:04,560 Tori Dunlap: I feel like might affect our relationships. I don't know 829 00:42:04,600 --> 00:42:06,759 Tori Dunlap: if anybody in my life has been like, no, I 830 00:42:06,800 --> 00:42:09,440 Tori Dunlap: don't want to be around you because of this, or 831 00:42:09,560 --> 00:42:13,080 Tori Dunlap: this is really hard. I am very protective though now 832 00:42:13,239 --> 00:42:19,920 Tori Dunlap: over my relationships, and my parents especially are extremely private people, 833 00:42:20,520 --> 00:42:22,759 Tori Dunlap: Like anytime I take a photo of them just for 834 00:42:22,880 --> 00:42:27,560 Tori Dunlap: my own my own camera role for five years ago, 835 00:42:27,560 --> 00:42:29,600 Tori Dunlap: don't post it on social media every time my mom 836 00:42:29,640 --> 00:42:31,600 Tori Dunlap: and like I know that by now they don't have 837 00:42:31,640 --> 00:42:37,360 Tori Dunlap: social media themselves, like they have very very little information 838 00:42:38,480 --> 00:42:41,840 Tori Dunlap: about them, and I know it makes them really really 839 00:42:41,880 --> 00:42:44,520 Tori Dunlap: nervous for me to be a public person, for me 840 00:42:44,560 --> 00:42:47,680 Tori Dunlap: to even talk about vaguely how much money I have, 841 00:42:48,239 --> 00:42:51,040 Tori Dunlap: and so that's impacted I think our relationship in that way. 842 00:42:51,600 --> 00:42:53,960 Tori Dunlap: But as far as I know, I mean, almost all 843 00:42:54,040 --> 00:42:59,279 Tori Dunlap: of my very close friends I had before ship blew up, 844 00:43:00,200 --> 00:43:03,080 Tori Dunlap: and I don't think that it's an accident. I don't 845 00:43:03,480 --> 00:43:06,719 Tori Dunlap: I'm not surprised by that the point I do want 846 00:43:06,719 --> 00:43:09,160 Tori Dunlap: to make, and I talk about this anytime I can, 847 00:43:09,239 --> 00:43:13,000 Tori Dunlap: because this is part of my work. Is when I 848 00:43:13,000 --> 00:43:14,520 Tori Dunlap: was saying to my first hundred kay, I was sharing 849 00:43:14,600 --> 00:43:17,640 Tori Dunlap: screenshots like of my bank account, no personal information, right, 850 00:43:17,800 --> 00:43:19,560 Tori Dunlap: you could see the exact amount of money in my 851 00:43:19,560 --> 00:43:23,319 Tori Dunlap: bank account. And I talk about financial transparency as one 852 00:43:23,320 --> 00:43:25,600 Tori Dunlap: of the best things we can do, both, you know, 853 00:43:25,719 --> 00:43:29,080 Tori Dunlap: to better personal finance and to feel ashamed about money, 854 00:43:29,080 --> 00:43:32,160 Tori Dunlap: but also to bridge all of the gaps we're trying 855 00:43:32,200 --> 00:43:37,000 Tori Dunlap: to bridge. Financial transparency talking about money is so incredible. However, 856 00:43:37,719 --> 00:43:40,359 Tori Dunlap: I can't be as transparent as I want to be 857 00:43:40,920 --> 00:43:45,719 Tori Dunlap: for my literal safety. And that's the shit that it's like, 858 00:43:46,040 --> 00:43:49,440 Tori Dunlap: the very work that I'm trying to do is also 859 00:43:49,719 --> 00:43:52,480 Tori Dunlap: I still have to play by patriarchal rules so that 860 00:43:52,520 --> 00:43:54,680 Tori Dunlap: I don't get harmed or so that my family doesn't 861 00:43:54,680 --> 00:43:56,680 Tori Dunlap: get harmed. Like I would love to talk about exactly 862 00:43:56,719 --> 00:43:58,319 Tori Dunlap: how much money I have, and I would love to 863 00:43:58,400 --> 00:44:01,239 Tori Dunlap: own that and celebrate that and also just be like 864 00:44:01,400 --> 00:44:06,040 Tori Dunlap: this transparent, but I can't do that now and haven't 865 00:44:06,080 --> 00:44:09,359 Tori Dunlap: been able to for a while without one a shit 866 00:44:09,440 --> 00:44:11,279 Tori Dunlap: ton of judgment from people who have never met me. 867 00:44:11,719 --> 00:44:16,440 Tori Dunlap: But also literal safety concerns. And so I think that 868 00:44:16,440 --> 00:44:19,759 Tori Dunlap: that's one thing that for me, you know, has a 869 00:44:19,760 --> 00:44:21,800 Tori Dunlap: lot to do with my personal relationships obviously has a 870 00:44:21,840 --> 00:44:24,279 Tori Dunlap: lot to do with my professional relationships. But it's like, 871 00:44:25,080 --> 00:44:28,520 Tori Dunlap: the very problem I'm trying to fix is also the 872 00:44:28,560 --> 00:44:30,280 Tori Dunlap: problem that I have to deal with all the time, 873 00:44:30,680 --> 00:44:34,520 Tori Dunlap: which is we shame women for having money. We don't 874 00:44:34,600 --> 00:44:37,320 Tori Dunlap: like women who want to bashedly pursue money. As a society, 875 00:44:37,520 --> 00:44:40,200 Tori Dunlap: we feel really uncomfortable with any woman who says I 876 00:44:40,239 --> 00:44:42,560 Tori Dunlap: want to get rich or I want to be wealthy, 877 00:44:42,600 --> 00:44:45,400 Tori Dunlap: and we have to justify everything, right, it's, oh, I 878 00:44:45,440 --> 00:44:47,359 Tori Dunlap: want to have money for my children. Oh, I want 879 00:44:47,400 --> 00:44:49,359 Tori Dunlap: to have money so that I can pay my people 880 00:44:49,360 --> 00:44:51,680 Tori Dunlap: at my business. Well what if it's just I want 881 00:44:51,719 --> 00:44:54,360 Tori Dunlap: money so that I have choices and options in my 882 00:44:54,400 --> 00:44:56,120 Tori Dunlap: own life, and I want to take a nice vacation 883 00:44:56,200 --> 00:44:59,080 Tori Dunlap: and I want to like, what if that is enough? 884 00:44:59,200 --> 00:45:03,280 Tori Dunlap: But it's not. And so because money is so emotionally loaded, 885 00:45:03,719 --> 00:45:06,120 Tori Dunlap: I think most people that are close in my life 886 00:45:07,120 --> 00:45:09,040 Tori Dunlap: from jump we were going to talk about money. We're 887 00:45:09,040 --> 00:45:11,480 Tori Dunlap: going to talk about it openly. You date me, you're 888 00:45:11,480 --> 00:45:13,400 Tori Dunlap: hanging out with me, That's what we're going to do 889 00:45:13,440 --> 00:45:18,200 Tori Dunlap: because that's my life. And also the yeah again, the 890 00:45:18,480 --> 00:45:20,960 Tori Dunlap: little voice in the back of my head worries sometimes, 891 00:45:21,520 --> 00:45:25,279 Tori Dunlap: oh does this make them uncomfortable? Do they feel like, 892 00:45:25,719 --> 00:45:29,120 Tori Dunlap: you know, money has changed me negatively? And I actually 893 00:45:29,160 --> 00:45:32,960 Tori Dunlap: remember I haven't told this story. I remember two years 894 00:45:33,000 --> 00:45:35,160 Tori Dunlap: ago I was on a book I was doing a 895 00:45:35,160 --> 00:45:38,120 Tori Dunlap: book event in Portland and that's where I went to college. 896 00:45:38,480 --> 00:45:40,840 Tori Dunlap: And I saw one of my really really good friends 897 00:45:40,840 --> 00:45:43,319 Tori Dunlap: from college that hadn't seen actually since we graduated. We 898 00:45:43,320 --> 00:45:45,040 Tori Dunlap: had tried to make it work and it just didn't happen, 899 00:45:45,520 --> 00:45:47,680 Tori Dunlap: and we went and got lunch, and like, we spent 900 00:45:47,800 --> 00:45:50,719 Tori Dunlap: a lot of time together. I love I continue to 901 00:45:50,760 --> 00:45:52,640 Tori Dunlap: love him, but especially in college, we spent so much 902 00:45:52,680 --> 00:45:55,680 Tori Dunlap: time together. And I remember probably an hour, hour and 903 00:45:55,719 --> 00:45:57,680 Tori Dunlap: a half into our lunch and you know, we ended 904 00:45:57,719 --> 00:45:59,319 Tori Dunlap: up like going on a walk and getting ice cream 905 00:45:59,320 --> 00:46:01,000 Tori Dunlap: and it's like very similar to what we would do 906 00:46:01,000 --> 00:46:02,640 Tori Dunlap: in college. And he looked at me and he was 907 00:46:02,680 --> 00:46:05,520 Tori Dunlap: kind of like, you haven't changed at all, but said 908 00:46:05,520 --> 00:46:07,960 Tori Dunlap: it was like a tone of surprise of like, oh, 909 00:46:08,280 --> 00:46:10,279 Tori Dunlap: you're still the same person. And I was like, what 910 00:46:10,320 --> 00:46:13,279 Tori Dunlap: did you expect And he was like, I don't know, 911 00:46:13,480 --> 00:46:15,719 Tori Dunlap: I don't know what I expected, but just maybe I 912 00:46:15,760 --> 00:46:18,160 Tori Dunlap: don't know. I just expected different, And that was both 913 00:46:18,200 --> 00:46:22,359 Tori Dunlap: a compliment for me of like, cool, this hasn't gone 914 00:46:22,400 --> 00:46:24,960 Tori Dunlap: to my head, but also at the same time a 915 00:46:25,000 --> 00:46:29,560 Tori Dunlap: reminder of like, oh, the expectation is maybe that I'm 916 00:46:29,680 --> 00:46:32,040 Tori Dunlap: a very different person now, and that's just interesting. 917 00:46:33,840 --> 00:46:37,040 ETS: As I craft this season of She Pivots, something that's 918 00:46:37,120 --> 00:46:39,920 ETS: always on my mind is what is happening in our country. 919 00:46:40,719 --> 00:46:42,879 ETS: I know there is a lot of fear and uncertainty 920 00:46:42,920 --> 00:46:46,120 ETS: around the world and the economy as a whole. It 921 00:46:46,120 --> 00:46:48,440 ETS: can be hard for people to plan for their futures 922 00:46:48,480 --> 00:46:51,880 ETS: when things feel so on edge. So I wanted to 923 00:46:51,880 --> 00:46:55,120 ETS: get Tory's expertise on how people can be thinking about 924 00:46:55,160 --> 00:46:58,040 ETS: investing and financial freedom in today's day and age. 925 00:47:00,000 --> 00:47:03,879 Tori Dunlap: I think regardless of who as president, there's always a 926 00:47:04,320 --> 00:47:07,520 Tori Dunlap: impact on your savings, on your investing, on the stock 927 00:47:07,560 --> 00:47:10,880 Tori Dunlap: market that is, that is the only guarantee. Really, we 928 00:47:10,920 --> 00:47:12,520 Tori Dunlap: don't know what the stock market is going to do, 929 00:47:12,600 --> 00:47:15,759 Tori Dunlap: we don't know how it's going to perform, but we 930 00:47:15,880 --> 00:47:17,960 Tori Dunlap: have to stay the course, just like anything else. So 931 00:47:18,440 --> 00:47:20,160 Tori Dunlap: I am still investing at the same rates I was 932 00:47:20,200 --> 00:47:23,240 Tori Dunlap: investing before because I have to prioritize my own savings 933 00:47:23,239 --> 00:47:27,160 Tori Dunlap: and my own retirement. I am really shoring up my 934 00:47:27,239 --> 00:47:31,719 Tori Dunlap: emergency funds. I am, you know, making sure that I 935 00:47:31,840 --> 00:47:34,920 Tori Dunlap: have savings both for myself personally, but also that the 936 00:47:34,960 --> 00:47:39,440 Tori Dunlap: business has savings in case something you know, happens in 937 00:47:39,960 --> 00:47:42,480 Tori Dunlap: the next four years plus years that we don't know. 938 00:47:43,520 --> 00:47:45,799 Tori Dunlap: But I also, again we've talked about this. We have 939 00:47:45,800 --> 00:47:48,560 Tori Dunlap: a whole episode about like how to financially and emotionally 940 00:47:48,560 --> 00:47:51,600 Tori Dunlap: prepare for the next four years of Trump on our show. 941 00:47:51,640 --> 00:47:53,319 Tori Dunlap: But one of the things we talked about too is 942 00:47:53,320 --> 00:47:58,280 Tori Dunlap: like having like a reproductive emergency fund. So either beefing 943 00:47:58,320 --> 00:48:00,360 Tori Dunlap: up the emergency fund you already have or see a 944 00:48:00,400 --> 00:48:03,680 Tori Dunlap: separate one for Okay, I got across state lines to 945 00:48:03,680 --> 00:48:06,640 Tori Dunlap: get the care I need, or I need to take 946 00:48:06,680 --> 00:48:09,360 Tori Dunlap: time off work to do that, like saving some money 947 00:48:09,400 --> 00:48:12,959 Tori Dunlap: so you have that flexibility. And also, like I said 948 00:48:13,200 --> 00:48:15,360 Tori Dunlap: at the start, and it's our tagline, but it's true, 949 00:48:15,560 --> 00:48:18,520 Tori Dunlap: a financial education is your best form of protest. So 950 00:48:19,320 --> 00:48:21,839 Tori Dunlap: the best thing you can do in these next four 951 00:48:21,920 --> 00:48:25,640 Tori Dunlap: years is get as much money in an ethical way 952 00:48:25,680 --> 00:48:28,800 Tori Dunlap: as possible so that you can take care of yourself, 953 00:48:28,840 --> 00:48:30,440 Tori Dunlap: so you can take care of your families, you can 954 00:48:30,480 --> 00:48:33,600 Tori Dunlap: take care of your community. Nothing bad happens when women 955 00:48:33,640 --> 00:48:37,040 Tori Dunlap: have money. And this feeling that you might have that 956 00:48:37,200 --> 00:48:39,239 Tori Dunlap: the pursuit of wealth or the pursuit of money is 957 00:48:39,280 --> 00:48:42,160 Tori Dunlap: bad or wrong or greedy is planted there by the 958 00:48:42,160 --> 00:48:45,960 Tori Dunlap: patriarchy to keep you controllable. I want you uncontrollable, meaning 959 00:48:45,960 --> 00:48:47,719 Tori Dunlap: that you have enough money to make the decisions you 960 00:48:47,719 --> 00:48:48,160 Tori Dunlap: want to make. 961 00:48:49,120 --> 00:48:51,759 ETS: What is something that at the time you felt like 962 00:48:51,880 --> 00:48:54,160 ETS: was a real negative for you, like a real low point, 963 00:48:54,320 --> 00:48:56,600 ETS: and now in retrospect you see it as having really 964 00:48:56,680 --> 00:48:58,760 ETS: set you up for the success that you are now. 965 00:49:00,160 --> 00:49:05,120 Tori Dunlap: Through this without crying. That end of the relationship felt 966 00:49:05,120 --> 00:49:08,040 Tori Dunlap: like my life was over. And it's going to sound 967 00:49:08,880 --> 00:49:12,640 Tori Dunlap: so melodramatic, but we have all had heartbreak, and so 968 00:49:13,360 --> 00:49:15,799 Tori Dunlap: just put yourself back in your heartbreak while I talk 969 00:49:15,840 --> 00:49:18,840 Tori Dunlap: about this. This person felt like the person I was 970 00:49:18,840 --> 00:49:20,400 Tori Dunlap: supposed to be with for the rest of my life. 971 00:49:21,480 --> 00:49:24,239 Tori Dunlap: And then when I wasn't, my entire life made no 972 00:49:24,280 --> 00:49:24,920 Tori Dunlap: sense anymore. 973 00:49:25,360 --> 00:49:25,680 ETS: I could. 974 00:49:25,840 --> 00:49:28,600 Tori Dunlap: I could not understand it. If I'm not with this 975 00:49:28,640 --> 00:49:32,000 Tori Dunlap: person and there's no potential that I'm with this person later, 976 00:49:32,640 --> 00:49:34,680 Tori Dunlap: it doesn't make any sense. And I will really bring 977 00:49:34,719 --> 00:49:37,880 Tori Dunlap: it home. Emily The reason that I was having all 978 00:49:37,880 --> 00:49:40,640 Tori Dunlap: these feelings and thoughts after a lot of therapy and 979 00:49:40,640 --> 00:49:43,319 Tori Dunlap: a lot of processing, was because I am a storyteller 980 00:49:43,360 --> 00:49:45,600 Tori Dunlap: at heart, and I could not see the end of 981 00:49:45,640 --> 00:49:49,320 Tori Dunlap: the story. And that drove me fucking insane. I could 982 00:49:49,360 --> 00:49:52,520 Tori Dunlap: not I was imagining, you know, okay, ten years later 983 00:49:52,520 --> 00:49:54,359 Tori Dunlap: and we're getting married. And then I would imagine ten 984 00:49:54,400 --> 00:49:56,280 Tori Dunlap: years later and I'm at his wedding, he who's marrying 985 00:49:56,280 --> 00:49:58,279 Tori Dunlap: somebody else, but we like lock eyes from across the 986 00:49:58,320 --> 00:50:00,279 Tori Dunlap: room and like everything's fine. We give that like knowing 987 00:50:00,280 --> 00:50:02,000 Tori Dunlap: glance to each other and the smile you know that 988 00:50:02,040 --> 00:50:03,960 Tori Dunlap: happens at the end of lallall Land. I guess you know, 989 00:50:04,239 --> 00:50:06,920 Tori Dunlap: like that That is what my brain was trying to 990 00:50:06,960 --> 00:50:09,080 Tori Dunlap: do to process because it was like, I'm in so 991 00:50:09,200 --> 00:50:13,480 Tori Dunlap: much pain and I have to think about that. This 992 00:50:13,600 --> 00:50:17,200 Tori Dunlap: pain was quote unquote worth it for it to make sense, 993 00:50:17,960 --> 00:50:21,040 Tori Dunlap: but it was not making sense. And I was in 994 00:50:21,080 --> 00:50:27,440 Tori Dunlap: that for a long time, like seriously, probably nine months, 995 00:50:27,480 --> 00:50:30,719 Tori Dunlap: maybe a year, but like still processing that probably two 996 00:50:30,760 --> 00:50:34,239 Tori Dunlap: two and a half. And publicly everything was happening all 997 00:50:34,280 --> 00:50:36,560 Tori Dunlap: the success. The podcast has blown up. We're getting millions 998 00:50:36,560 --> 00:50:40,560 Tori Dunlap: of followers, We're getting millions in revenue, and I am 999 00:50:41,120 --> 00:50:44,200 Tori Dunlap: at times numb, I'm at times crying on the bathroom floor, 1000 00:50:44,840 --> 00:50:47,359 Tori Dunlap: and I remember I had a solid three weeks, which 1001 00:50:47,400 --> 00:50:49,440 Tori Dunlap: doesn't sound like a long time, but for a joyful person, 1002 00:50:49,440 --> 00:50:53,000 Tori Dunlap: it was a long time where every day I honestly 1003 00:50:53,040 --> 00:50:56,080 Tori Dunlap: thought I will never feel joy again. And I look 1004 00:50:56,200 --> 00:50:59,800 Tori Dunlap: back on that as the most challenging period of my life. 1005 00:50:59,480 --> 00:51:02,719 Tori Dunlap: And as cliche as it stands, God, if I got 1006 00:51:02,719 --> 00:51:05,839 Tori Dunlap: through that, I can go through anything. If I came 1007 00:51:05,880 --> 00:51:09,160 Tori Dunlap: out the other side of that, of the grief and 1008 00:51:09,320 --> 00:51:12,200 Tori Dunlap: just the understanding and learning a lot about myself, and 1009 00:51:12,320 --> 00:51:16,479 Tori Dunlap: look back and actually feel like it was helpful, great, wow, 1010 00:51:17,239 --> 00:51:20,200 Tori Dunlap: and the biggest thing I learned And you only learn 1011 00:51:20,239 --> 00:51:21,840 Tori Dunlap: it when you're in it. Everybody tells you it and 1012 00:51:22,000 --> 00:51:24,719 Tori Dunlap: don't listen, and then you learn it. Is like, the 1013 00:51:24,840 --> 00:51:27,680 Tori Dunlap: only way I got through that was sitting in it 1014 00:51:27,760 --> 00:51:31,000 Tori Dunlap: and time. And it wasn't forcing myself to get better, 1015 00:51:31,560 --> 00:51:33,759 Tori Dunlap: because that's what I thought, Okay, when we hit six 1016 00:51:33,800 --> 00:51:36,080 Tori Dunlap: months later, I'll feel better. When we do this and 1017 00:51:36,160 --> 00:51:38,239 Tori Dunlap: I'm able to feel this way, then we'll be better. No, 1018 00:51:38,600 --> 00:51:40,399 Tori Dunlap: I just had to sit in it, and I had 1019 00:51:40,440 --> 00:51:43,960 Tori Dunlap: to let it move through me for as long as 1020 00:51:43,960 --> 00:51:48,120 Tori Dunlap: it took and be okay with that, And yeah, it 1021 00:51:48,200 --> 00:51:51,240 Tori Dunlap: changed my life. And I'm very thankful to this person 1022 00:51:51,680 --> 00:51:55,399 Tori Dunlap: both for the relationship that we had. That was the 1023 00:51:55,440 --> 00:51:59,000 Tori Dunlap: first time I think I've ever experienced unconditional love, which 1024 00:51:59,120 --> 00:52:03,200 Tori Dunlap: was so beautiful, and also very very thankful for the 1025 00:52:03,320 --> 00:52:06,360 Tori Dunlap: end of that relationship and what it taught me and 1026 00:52:06,400 --> 00:52:10,560 Tori Dunlap: what it taught me about being able to experience hard 1027 00:52:10,600 --> 00:52:15,839 Tori Dunlap: things and know that the feeling of aliveness I get 1028 00:52:15,840 --> 00:52:18,360 Tori Dunlap: when I feel joyful is the same feeling all the 1029 00:52:18,400 --> 00:52:23,280 Tori Dunlap: liveness I feel when the pain is so crushing. So yeah, 1030 00:52:23,320 --> 00:52:26,080 Tori Dunlap: it impacted my life a lot, and I thought I 1031 00:52:26,120 --> 00:52:29,359 Tori Dunlap: was like, Okay, we will get through this, and it's 1032 00:52:29,400 --> 00:52:31,120 Tori Dunlap: going to be awful and we're just going to muscle 1033 00:52:31,120 --> 00:52:33,680 Tori Dunlap: through it. And now I look back on it with 1034 00:52:33,760 --> 00:52:37,399 Tori Dunlap: actually a shit ton of gratitude because it really really 1035 00:52:37,400 --> 00:52:40,880 Tori Dunlap: helped me process a lot of things, but also maybe 1036 00:52:41,080 --> 00:52:42,200 Tori Dunlap: into the person I am today. 1037 00:52:42,960 --> 00:52:44,160 ETS: Thank you so much, Tori. 1038 00:52:45,120 --> 00:52:47,640 Tori Dunlap: Thank you so great having you on, Thank you for 1039 00:52:47,680 --> 00:52:48,120 Tori Dunlap: having me. 1040 00:52:49,600 --> 00:52:53,560 ETS: Toy is still leading the financial feminist movement by educating 1041 00:52:53,600 --> 00:52:57,840 ETS: millions on how they can build wealth and feel financially confident. 1042 00:52:58,440 --> 00:53:01,719 ETS: Go follow Toy on Instane Instagram at her first one 1043 00:53:01,800 --> 00:53:04,680 ETS: hundred K to stay up to date and have access 1044 00:53:04,719 --> 00:53:10,239 ETS: to all her amazing resources. Thanks for listening. Thanks for 1045 00:53:10,360 --> 00:53:13,799 ETS: listening to this episode of she Pivots. I hope you 1046 00:53:13,920 --> 00:53:16,320 ETS: enjoyed it, and if you did, leave us a rating 1047 00:53:16,400 --> 00:53:19,480 ETS: and tell your friends about us. To learn more about 1048 00:53:19,480 --> 00:53:23,560 ETS: our guests, follow us on Instagram at she pivots the Podcast, 1049 00:53:24,040 --> 00:53:26,239 ETS: or sign up for our newsletter, where you can get 1050 00:53:26,280 --> 00:53:29,880 ETS: exclusive behind the scenes content on our website at she 1051 00:53:30,040 --> 00:53:37,640 ETS: pivots thepodcast dot com. Special thanks to the she pivots team, 1052 00:53:37,760 --> 00:53:43,040 ETS: Executive producer Emily Edavlosk, Associate producer and social media connoisseur 1053 00:53:43,080 --> 00:53:48,279 ETS: Hannah Cousins, Research director Christine Dickinson, Events and Logistics coordinator 1054 00:53:48,320 --> 00:53:52,920 ETS: Madeline Snovak, and audio editor and mixer Nina pollock I 1055 00:53:53,160 --> 00:54:04,480 ETS: endorse she pivots