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Speaker 1: Now it's time for your brand new phone tap. Today,

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Speaker 1: I call a woman to tell her I'm excited to

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Speaker 1: meet her. She thinks I'm her daughter's new boyfriend, and

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Speaker 1: she's about to find out that I'm not really interested

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Speaker 1: in her daughter. I've got my eye on somebody else. Mama,

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Speaker 1: it's your phone tap right now. I'm hello. Hi? Is

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Speaker 1: this Stella? Yes? It is Hey. How are you? This

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Speaker 1: is Barry, Caitlin's boyfriend. Oh Barry, Yeah? Um? Hello, I

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Speaker 1: know we haven't met yet, and I'm just calling to

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Speaker 1: say that I'm excited to finally meet you. Okay, Um,

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Speaker 1: I'm looking forward to meeting you as well. I've heard

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Speaker 1: a lot about you. Oh yeah, same. Here She's shown

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Speaker 1: me a few of the family pictures, and may I

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Speaker 1: just say, wow, I am a lucky guy. Um okay,

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Speaker 1: I mean, how lucky am I to be dating a

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Speaker 1: very cute girl in your daughter Caitlin, and also be

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Speaker 1: invited to dinner at her even more attractive mother's house. Thanks,

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Speaker 1: that's very nice of you. Don't be modest, Stella. You're

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Speaker 1: quite the peach, aren't you. Oh well, that's very very

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Speaker 1: nice of you to say, Barry, Thank you very much, stella.

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Speaker 1: Come on, it's Barry, it's your daughter's boyfriend. Let's be honest.

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Speaker 1: You've had your fair share of dudes having you arry.

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Speaker 1: I don't think that's really inappropriate. One thing you'll learn

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Speaker 1: about me is I don't shy away from compliments. I

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Speaker 1: just think you're a very attractive lady, and I can't

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Speaker 1: wait to meet you. Well, thank you very much. That's

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Speaker 1: very sweet. Any I was thinking about showing up to

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Speaker 1: dinner on Saturday about an hour early. If you're interested,

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Speaker 1: we could hang out and get a drink before and

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Speaker 1: see what happens. I don't understand. I was just saying

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Speaker 1: I could show up a little early on Saturday to dinner,

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Speaker 1: and you and I could maybe have a glass of

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Speaker 1: wine while we wait for your daughter to get there.

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Speaker 1: I don't think that's necessary. We will have plenty of

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Speaker 1: time to talk when Caitlin is there with us. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: but I think it'd be better for us to get

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Speaker 1: to know each other just one on one, don't you No,

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Speaker 1: I do not. You know. I've been with older women before.

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Speaker 1: I don't see how that's important in this conversation. Barry,

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Speaker 1: being with an older woman is actually refreshing to me.

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Speaker 1: I find it a lot more satisfying than their younger counterparts.

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Speaker 1: Nothing wrong with experience. I'm really not comfortable with this conversation, Barry.

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Speaker 1: What do you mean You're not very inappropriate for you

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Speaker 1: to be sharing this information with me now? Or ever?

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Speaker 1: What do you mean you're uncomfortable? Are you? I'm uncomfortable

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Speaker 1: with this conversation. Are you feeling urges? Is that what's

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Speaker 1: going on? Urges? Yeah? Do you have urges right now

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Speaker 1: in the way that you're referring to them? Absolutely not,

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Speaker 1: because it sounds to me like you're feeling the same

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Speaker 1: way I am. Are you doing what I think you're doing.

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Speaker 1: I'm just calling to introduce myself to my girlfriend's mom.

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Speaker 1: You know, Barry, your tone and the words you're choosing

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Speaker 1: is very very suggestive, and I don't appreciate it. And

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Speaker 1: I don't think that it's appropriate for my daughter to

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Speaker 1: be dating someone who would behave like this or her mother.

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Speaker 1: I don't know what you're talking about. I simply was

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Speaker 1: calling to say, hey, thanks for inviting me over for dinner.

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Speaker 1: I've been dating your daughter for quite a while now.

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Speaker 1: I can't wait to meet you. That's all I was saying. No, Barry,

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Speaker 1: it was more than that. You're talking about older women.

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Speaker 1: You invited me to have a drink with you before

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Speaker 1: my daughter gets there, and you're telling me how you

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Speaker 1: find older women more sexy than younger women. So none

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Speaker 1: of that is appropriate. So I need to, like to

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Speaker 1: come on. I feel at this point I need to

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Speaker 1: tell you something and I don't want you to take

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Speaker 1: it the wrong way. Okay, fine, what is it like?

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Speaker 1: Your daughter? A lot? But I'm starting to feel a

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Speaker 1: little uncomfortable with this phone call because it seems like

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Speaker 1: you're hitting on me. I'm hitting on you. Oh you are.

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Speaker 1: Thanks for confirming. No, I'm not. Absolutely I'm not. Well,

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Speaker 1: you just said it, and that's what I was feeling.

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Speaker 1: It was a rhetorical question, and I think that's very

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Speaker 1: disrespectful to your daughter and very disrespectful to our new relationship.

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Speaker 1: Very I don't want you here in my home, and

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Speaker 1: I certainly don't want you anywhere near my daughter. Are

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Speaker 1: you saying that you want me to be with you

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Speaker 1: and your daughter? Because I am absolutely not saying that.

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Speaker 1: I'm saying that I don't want you in my house

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Speaker 1: and I don't want you near my daughter. Okay, but

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Speaker 1: I want to tell you that I am not into that.

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Speaker 1: I'm a committed man and I'm committed to your daughter.

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Speaker 1: I like her a lot. You're delusional, you are absolutely crazy.

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Speaker 1: What is wrong with you? Are you some kind of

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Speaker 1: weird pervert who likes to sleep with mothers and daughters?

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Speaker 1: This is so. There's that invitation again. Yeah, how my

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Speaker 1: daughter thought whiped it up with someone as insane as

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Speaker 1: you are. I just heard that invitation again about sleeping

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Speaker 1: with Okay, it's not happening. And then I also heard

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Speaker 1: you say that the word twister. We are not playing

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Speaker 1: naked twister together. We're not doing that. I said twisted,

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Speaker 1: not twister. Are you moron? Away from mine house, Barry

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Speaker 1: or I am calling the dres another thing that you

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Speaker 1: got wrong. I'm not Berry. What are you talking about?

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Speaker 1: You're just wrong all over the place. Because this is

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Speaker 1: actually Jewil from Brook and Jewel in the morning doing

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Speaker 1: a phone tap on you. What. It's a joke. Your daughter,

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Speaker 1: Caitlin emailed us and said that you were nervous about

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Speaker 1: meeting your new boyfriend and she wanted to meet a

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Speaker 1: mess with you. Oh my god, oh my god, thank you,

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Speaker 1: I mean thank you, I mean thank God that you're not. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: my daughter, Hey Stella, look, I know we're sharing a

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Speaker 1: moment right now, but I'm feeling I'm feeling like you're

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Speaker 1: hitting on me again, and I gotta let you know

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Speaker 1: that can't happen. Oh yes, oh yes, I am hitting

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Speaker 1: on you. Please please week see there you go, just

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Speaker 1: happened again. Can't help myself wake up every morning with

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Speaker 1: jubal phone tabs weekday mornings on the twenties. Holy on

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Speaker 1: moving ninety two point five, you give done down soil

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Speaker 1: falling away from me. I didn't say