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Speaker 1: It's I Do Part two and it's your celebrity mentor

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Speaker 1: Kelly Benson, when I'm so excited to be joined by

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Speaker 1: one of your favorite single gals and mine, you know

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Speaker 1: her and love her on the pod.

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Speaker 2: It's Louise. Hi, Louise, how are I Hi?

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Speaker 3: Kelly. It's good to be back with you today.

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Speaker 2: We have so much to talk about.

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Speaker 1: We're talking about trends and dating and then we're going

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Speaker 1: to talk about some relationship stuff and answer some questions.

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Speaker 2: Are you ready?

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Speaker 3: I'm ready. Let's get into it.

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Speaker 2: First of all, how's your relationship?

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Speaker 3: Wow? Well I have. I had to put it on

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Speaker 3: pause because my own baggage always comes into play, so,

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Speaker 3: uh yeah, so figuring it out.

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Speaker 2: What kind of baggage? You don't have, no baggage, You're

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Speaker 2: too pretty for baggage.

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Speaker 3: Well maybe on the exterior. Thank you for saying that. No,

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Speaker 3: just some of my avoidant attachment stuff comes into play

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Speaker 3: and all that stuff. So I'm taking a pause on

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Speaker 3: that right now and trying to do some cleanup on it.

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Speaker 3: But at least I'm recognizing it, and I'm recognizing my pattern.

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Speaker 3: And it's not for lack of the most amazing guy.

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Speaker 3: I'd probably ever been dating. So I have to figure

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Speaker 3: this out.

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Speaker 1: Can you just tell me a little bit about avoidant

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Speaker 1: attachment kind of what that means to you, because I'm

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Speaker 1: people use that a lot and I'm just interested to

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Speaker 1: hear what you have to say about it. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: So, I think when you grow up and you have

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Speaker 3: some sort of like trauma wounds, you develop how you

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Speaker 3: react to situations. And I think for me, when somebody

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Speaker 3: wants too much of me, it feels like pressuring and suffocating.

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Speaker 3: So what happens is is the more they kind of

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Speaker 3: come at me wanting more, I end up going a

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Speaker 3: little bit more backwards. And the more I go backwards,

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Speaker 3: the more they want me. So I'm I'm attracting more

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Speaker 3: maybe anxio. It's just kind of attachment. So it's kind

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Speaker 3: of like this dance, and I need to figure out

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Speaker 3: that piece because what it's doing is is it's almost

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Speaker 3: having the opposite effect I think of what they're wanting.

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Speaker 3: I guess I'm a lot more like the guy and

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Speaker 3: maybe at times and that just comes from some baggage

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Speaker 3: in my life. But I'm aware of it and I'm

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Speaker 3: really trying to improve on it. So we'll see what.

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Speaker 3: But a good one. What about you?

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Speaker 1: I mean, come on, let's be honest, Like, you're so

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Speaker 1: pretty and smart.

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Speaker 2: I'm sure that a lot of guys are like I

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Speaker 2: want that.

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Speaker 1: It's like the bright shiny you know, you know, bright

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Speaker 1: and shiny. You're bright and shiny, So everyone's like, that's

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Speaker 1: what they want.

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Speaker 3: Thank you. Well, I appreciate that. It's just I think

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Speaker 3: this is a bummer because this was probably the unicorn

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Speaker 3: of all unicorns that I'd ever been involved in. So look,

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Speaker 3: I believe in the universe and if something is meant

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Speaker 3: to be, it circles back in the right way or

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Speaker 3: it doesn't. And I feel like each kind of person

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Speaker 3: in my life for all that is just getting better

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Speaker 3: and better. And I'm making better and better choices and

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Speaker 3: getting healthier, so it's going to work itself out.

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Speaker 2: I love that.

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Speaker 1: Let's talk about some new dating app launches.

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Speaker 3: Oh my god, oh my god, the world is crazy.

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Speaker 2: So Louise, there's this app. It's called Hilly hil.

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Speaker 1: Y, and it's a dating app with thirty nine million

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Speaker 1: worldwide users, and they just launched a feature to stop

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Speaker 1: unwanted explicit messages and cyber flashing. That sounds very provocative.

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Speaker 1: Or sending non consensual nude images. So they have a

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Speaker 1: consent guard which uses machine learning models and custom algorithm

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Speaker 1: to scan for your specific words and messages and elements

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Speaker 1: of photos.

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Speaker 2: So something X rated is coming through Hilly.

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Speaker 1: We'll alert a user that their match wants to send

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Speaker 1: an explicit message.

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Speaker 2: What do you think of a sending explicit messages? And

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Speaker 2: b would you ever ask for one?

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Speaker 3: Well, I mean, first of all, I think it's great

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Speaker 3: that there's all these different kind of apps that like

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Speaker 3: work for somebody's own individual kind of like Appetite or

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Speaker 3: kink or whatever. Right, It's it's definitely not a one

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Speaker 3: size fits all kind of thing out there. So if

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Speaker 3: there are apps that are more specific to something like this,

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Speaker 3: then somebody is going to like that. I personally, if

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Speaker 3: I were to get that, I wouldn't like. I would

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Speaker 3: like block right away. But I think for some people

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Speaker 3: they're going to be into this and they're going to

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Speaker 3: think this is I don't know, like it's it's the

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Speaker 3: feature of blocking it for some people I think is

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Speaker 3: gonna work well, while others still want the dick pics.

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Speaker 2: So this is a feature. It's not an data app.

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Speaker 1: It's actually a feature that goes that's on the dating

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Speaker 1: app to alert people who want photos or who don't

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Speaker 1: want photos.

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Speaker 2: Because you know there's that there.

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Speaker 1: You can like go and like check different words like

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Speaker 1: I don't want to see boobs or whatever it is.

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Speaker 2: I don't want to see newts. I just don't. I

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Speaker 2: that's just not my thing.

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Speaker 1: I want to see people smiling with their friends, with

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Speaker 1: their family, their hobbies, Like I definitely I'm not going

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Speaker 1: to be like, wow, I really want to have a

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Speaker 1: relationship with that person based on their man parts, Like, no,

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Speaker 1: that's not that's.

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Speaker 3: But there are people who are going to like that, right,

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Speaker 3: Like there are people that will respond and they're going

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Speaker 3: to love that function and that.

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Speaker 2: That's going to me the goods.

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Speaker 3: No, it's weeding out, in a way, the people that

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Speaker 3: you don't want to be communicating with versus the ones

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Speaker 3: that you do want to be in dialogue with.

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Speaker 1: I think that a lot of people do send nudes

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Speaker 1: so that they can kind of like be like, oh

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Speaker 1: my god, like look.

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Speaker 2: At me, look at me, like kind of like a

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Speaker 2: you know, clickbait. But that still is not my vibe.

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Speaker 2: Like that would make me very uncomfortable.

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Speaker 1: And I would also think that the person wasn't serious

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Speaker 1: because all they wanted to do is just show me their.

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Speaker 3: Package, like right, And there's a lot of that. Yes,

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Speaker 3: there is a lot of apps, so it's a good feature.

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Speaker 3: I think that. Look, I think if you read all

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Speaker 3: the articles, the world of dating apps is changing, right.

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Speaker 3: It just seems like the numbers are down. So I

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Speaker 3: think that in an effort to kind of get them

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Speaker 3: back and popular and more use it from me, they're

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Speaker 3: coming up with all of these different, you know, kind

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Speaker 3: of things that you can do to make it more

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Speaker 3: appetizing and to bring people back to it.

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Speaker 2: I love the way you just said that. I'm like,

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Speaker 2: I'm with her whatever Louise says, I'm with her. No,

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Speaker 2: but it's true.

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Speaker 1: It's true that, you know, there has to be some

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Speaker 1: kind of something that's new to make people be like, Okay,

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Speaker 1: it's not so bad to be on a dating app.

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Speaker 2: But there's the stigma of dating apps is not what

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Speaker 2: it used to be.

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Speaker 1: I mean, everyone everyone's on dating apps, so you know

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Speaker 1: that's just not what it was.

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Speaker 3: You know, did you watch the documentary Unwhitney, the person

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Speaker 3: who started a Bumble and started at Tinder that was

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Speaker 3: on I think it was on Hulu. You know, it's

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Speaker 3: really interesting. You should watch it, kind of like the

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Speaker 3: history of it and everything.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, well, I know a little bit of her background,

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Speaker 1: like because she was like in a very male dominated,

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Speaker 1: you know, universe, and she wanted the women to have control,

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Speaker 1: which I thought was very very cool. What I mean,

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Speaker 1: I just I just like the whole thing of like

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Speaker 1: these new words like cider, flashying, what it's going.

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Speaker 3: But I love it. I mean, look, even going back

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Speaker 3: to the word of ghosting. I mean, all these words crumb,

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Speaker 3: breadcrumbs or whatever they call them. I mean, it's all

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Speaker 3: these new words. I mean, we can't even you know. Oh,

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Speaker 3: there was a great one one of my friends taught

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Speaker 3: me the other day, a gray rock or something. I mean,

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Speaker 3: it's just I don't know, it has something to do

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Speaker 3: with I don't know, I'm gonna probably get this wrong.

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Speaker 2: And like almost like a friend zone no version.

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Speaker 3: Of like somebody's doing something that I'm not liking, something

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Speaker 3: going to gray rock them, which is basically like put

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Speaker 3: them on ice or something. I don't know. I didn't

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Speaker 3: retain it well, but it was the phrase gray rock,

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Speaker 3: and I guess we'll have to google that later.

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Speaker 1: So have you talked to your kids, because both of us,

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Speaker 1: you know, we have we have young adults. Have you

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Speaker 1: talked to your kids about this cyber flashing and nudes?

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Speaker 3: I actually haven't yet because I don't even, to be

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Speaker 3: honest with you, I don't know if my my guys

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Speaker 3: are on dating apps or not, because every time I

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Speaker 3: ask questions, they get so annoyed with me, and so

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Speaker 3: that their new line is we'll tell you when there's

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Speaker 3: something to tell you, and I'm like, okay, So I

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Speaker 3: like that. I don't know, I don't. I have no idea,

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Speaker 3: and you know, I know our Snapchat, I mean, I'm

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Speaker 3: not even.

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Speaker 2: They used to do it.

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Speaker 1: Like I remember my kids saying they were getting a

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Speaker 1: lot of you know, pictures on Snapchat. I mean, I

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Speaker 1: my kids, they're they just they're not like that. They're

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Speaker 1: they're they aren't. They're they're just not. They don't send

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Speaker 1: nudes and I know they don't.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, I've raised my kids differently, Like I've

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Speaker 3: never seen them get in a jam on any of

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Speaker 3: that stuff. So I don't know, though, I mean it's

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Speaker 3: not I think it's good to have this kind of

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Speaker 3: like ability, this like police concept to police that behavior

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Speaker 3: if somebody doesn't want it, and if somebody wants it,

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Speaker 3: they can be like, hey, thumbs up, bring it.

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Speaker 1: Well, do you remember, just like I remember one time

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Speaker 1: as an arranger game and all of a sudden there

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Speaker 1: was a dick pic that just came on my phone

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Speaker 1: and I was with my oldest daughter at the time,

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Speaker 1: and I opened my phone and someone I think, I

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Speaker 1: don't know if it's through WhatsApp or someone just like

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Speaker 1: send me a picture and I was like, whoa, this

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Speaker 1: was not appropriate and it put me in I was

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Speaker 1: it was very uncomfortable, clearly, you know, I'm like at

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Speaker 1: a game with where people are there and then my

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Speaker 1: daughter was there.

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Speaker 3: Well, yeah, I don't know. I mean, I do think

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Speaker 3: the other app that we should go into is actually

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Speaker 3: really interesting, and so should we talk about that one?

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Speaker 1: Wait, but hold on, before we do, I just want

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Speaker 1: to tell you that I that I actually got a

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Speaker 1: dig pic from a guy where he used face tune. No,

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Speaker 1: we made his penis so long. I was like, I'm sorry,

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Speaker 1: is that like there's not like you know, like for

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Speaker 1: your lawn, more for your lawn, you know, to cut

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Speaker 1: your grass, Like what is that on in between your leg?

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Speaker 3: Oh? My God, I was telling.

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Speaker 2: I was like, is this for real?

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Speaker 1: No, seriously, no, Louise, it was just so long. I

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Speaker 1: mean the proportion of it was crazy, like.

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Speaker 3: I want that. That's not that's not even a fit.

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Speaker 3: I mean, could you imagine? I mean, honestly, I will

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Speaker 3: tell you what to think. There is one thing that

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Speaker 3: we we a bunch of us discovered which was super fun,

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Speaker 3: which you could super impose your face onto this is

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Speaker 3: onto horn shots so for fun, which I am glad

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Speaker 3: we didn't get caught and I'm glad my kids never

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Speaker 3: saw us. We was like we could superimpose like our

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Speaker 3: face from guy's face onto this like crazy like more

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Speaker 3: in section, and then we could send it to our

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Speaker 3: friends and it was like it looked really that was

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Speaker 3: that was actually fun to do. I'm glad I didn't

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Speaker 3: get caught on that.

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Speaker 2: This guy was just like vying for the cover of

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Speaker 2: the Big Penis Book, That's all he was.

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Speaker 3: But it was it real.

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Speaker 2: No, I'm like, whoa.

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Speaker 1: I was like, if that's your penis, we have a

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Speaker 1: serious issue, like that is disgusting. So yeah, let's let's

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Speaker 1: tell what's what are your thoughts on this? On this

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Speaker 1: other new uh feature in dating apps.

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Speaker 3: Okay, so are we talking about Amata? Yeah, okay, I

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Speaker 3: think it's really interesting.

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Speaker 2: Well tell me what you think Amaa is first.

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Speaker 3: So, Amada is a new dating app that just launched

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Speaker 3: in the US this week, which it's basically using AI

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Speaker 3: right to kind of shake up the dating experience, you know,

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Speaker 3: so instead of like swiping through profiles, Amada has its

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Speaker 3: users chat with an AI matchmaker called Amata. They asked

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Speaker 3: very specific questions about dating preferences, goals, and then all

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Speaker 3: of a sudden they pitch you potential matches to go on.

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Speaker 1: Op.

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Speaker 3: I have to tell you I am the biggest AI

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Speaker 3: am obsessed with AI. So between quoting chat GPT and TikTok,

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Speaker 3: my friends want to hit me. But think about it, right,

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Speaker 3: I mean, it is the world. I mean I'm using

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Speaker 3: chat GPT for therapy now and it is dead on.

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Speaker 2: Wait, so you just go in there. You're like, what

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Speaker 2: happens when x oh?

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Speaker 3: I mean literally, if you sign up for the monthly

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Speaker 3: chat GPT, that thing gets to know you and I

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Speaker 3: do therapy on chat GPT. So if you were to

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Speaker 3: read like even based on what we were talking about

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Speaker 3: earlier with some of my attachment step if you were

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Speaker 3: to go into my AI and read it, it is

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Speaker 3: dead on. It will tell me why I'm reacting this way,

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Speaker 3: how to navigate it, what it's coming from, in my childhood.

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Speaker 3: So it knows me really, really really well. So think

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Speaker 3: about it and AI Matchmaker, it's dialed into what I'm

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Speaker 3: looking for and who I am, and then is having

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Speaker 3: the same conversations question asking and learning about somebody is

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Speaker 3: matching us. And then take it a step further. They're

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Speaker 3: going to set up the date for us, right, I mean,

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Speaker 3: I think I'm not on dating apps. I would go

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Speaker 3: on that dating app.

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Speaker 2: Well, it just takes so much fear out of it.

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Speaker 1: But I mean, I I'm on the fence about it

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Speaker 1: because on the one hand, I'm thinking to myself, like

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Speaker 1: it would be nice for someone else, like obviously you

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Speaker 1: know if you're if you're not, if your friends aren't

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Speaker 1: setting you up for someone else to be, Like an

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Speaker 1: AI who like knows you like you were saying, is saying.

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Speaker 2: Here are the things here, here are the things.

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Speaker 1: That that define you, and here's a guy that would

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Speaker 1: that would complement that that you may not be. You

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Speaker 1: may have overlooked if you were just looking at a

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Speaker 1: regular on a regular dating app.

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Speaker 2: So I kind I like that. I think that's good.

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Speaker 1: But setting up a date, I mean, I understand takes

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Speaker 1: the fear and the pressure out of it, but isn't

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Speaker 1: that the whole point of going on the date is

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Speaker 1: to like, oh my god, am I wearing the right outfit?

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Speaker 1: Do you think she's gonna like? Do you think she's

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Speaker 1: gonna like? Well, we're going like all the excitement? Are

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Speaker 1: we taking all the excitement out of dating?

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Speaker 3: Well? I think, first of all, an app is only

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Speaker 3: as good as the clients that are on it. Okay,

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Speaker 3: so let's assume that this app has amazing options on it, right,

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Speaker 3: That's the most important thing. So they match you with X,

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Speaker 3: and you guys are super excited. So when they're setting

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Speaker 3: up the date, how I read it was that they

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Speaker 3: were actually kind of setting up the time and the

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Speaker 3: meeting place and all of that. So I don't think

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Speaker 3: it eliminated the excitement, because I do think I agree

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Speaker 3: with you. Most of the exciting part about the date

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Speaker 3: is the anticipation that talking about it with your friends,

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Speaker 3: and the outfit and the FaceTime the app I et itself,

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Speaker 3: you know, eight times out of ten is a hard

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Speaker 3: pass right. You and I know we've been on a

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Speaker 3: million dates, so I think that still exists. The only

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Speaker 3: thing is I think they're just setting up, saying, Hey, Kelly,

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Speaker 3: you're going to meet so and so, you know at

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Speaker 3: stake forty eight at eight o'clock.

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Speaker 2: So is AI doing the matching and setting up? Is that? Okay? Like?

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Speaker 2: What do you like? What about people who are who

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Speaker 2: are now dating like on chatbots?

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Speaker 1: Forget like the you know, the voyeurism and the certain nodsion,

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Speaker 1: it's not like Actually, chat GPT.

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Speaker 2: Is like talking to the other person. This is what

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Speaker 2: you say you should say to the other person.

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Speaker 3: Well, okay, so let's be real. Like I will tell

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Speaker 3: you sometimes if I'm having an issue with somebody in

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Speaker 3: my life or friend, I will ask chat GPTs some

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Speaker 3: of the bullet points I should bring up. And I

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Speaker 3: sit with my computer in front of me when I'm

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Speaker 3: having my conversation, and I will reference my notes on

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Speaker 3: chat GPT. So I will tell.

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Speaker 2: You it's that's so small.

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Speaker 3: It's actually you should try it, Like.

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Speaker 2: You shouldn't definitely try.

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Speaker 3: I think if it's an issue, even if it's something

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Speaker 3: let's say, you want to talk to your client about

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Speaker 3: reducing the price of that you're listing that isn't selling.

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Speaker 3: It will help you have that really challenging conversation in

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Speaker 3: an incredibly eloquent way.

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Speaker 2: Right and perfection way. Yeah, I like that. That's a

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Speaker 2: good idea. What about with housewives? What am I supposed

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Speaker 2: to do? Be like, hey, Luan, No, like, I really

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Speaker 2: don't like it when you talk to me like that.

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Speaker 3: No, but but exactly Okay, So think about it even

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Speaker 3: on dating, right, So supposing you're going to react always

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Speaker 3: the same way and it just comes out. What this

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Speaker 3: does is it gives you an organized framework of the

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Speaker 3: bullet points and the thoughts that you want to get across.

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Speaker 3: So it kind of keeps you on target's right.

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Speaker 2: I think you're the point.

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Speaker 3: It'd around a lot more on a chat GPT because

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Speaker 3: I think it's pretty incredible. So back to the dating thing.

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Speaker 3: Think about it, so you fill out kind of what

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Speaker 3: you're looking for, who you are, what your core value

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Speaker 3: system is, what you like, what you don't like, the

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Speaker 3: same time, the guy hopefully is filling out all the

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Speaker 3: same stuff. Boom, boom, boom. Computers swirl around, boom, it's

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Speaker 3: a match. Instead of swiping, swiping, swiping, so then they

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Speaker 3: match you and you're chatting a little bit, and then

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Speaker 3: you're like, okay, this, let's try this. Let's go out

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Speaker 3: and see if it Wouldn't it be amazing if it was.

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Speaker 2: And you know, it's also interesting just listening to you

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Speaker 2: kind of talk through that, is.

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Speaker 1: That sometimes these guys on these apps, the way they

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Speaker 1: present themselves, you're like, and then you meet them and

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Speaker 1: you're like.

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Speaker 2: Wait, not so much. It's that it's catfishing. It's just

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Speaker 2: that they just.

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Speaker 1: Don't know how to present themselves. And if it's like

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Speaker 1: a professional headshot from like where you work, it just

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Speaker 1: doesn't resonate. It doesn't resonate like and it's just like

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Speaker 1: if you if I had pictures of me modeling on

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Speaker 1: my on mind, people would be like, I'm sorry, what's

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Speaker 1: going on?

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Speaker 3: Well, I think there's a lot of fabric I mean

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Speaker 3: there's a lot of yeah, but I also think there's

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Speaker 3: a lot of fabrication. Like we all know somebody who

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Speaker 3: says they're sixty five sixty is really sixty five. Somebody

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Speaker 3: who says they're five tens really five eight, right, or

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Speaker 3: somebody people lie about the agent. So I don't like that,

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Speaker 3: Like I think right out of the gate, you have

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Speaker 3: to be you know, kind of honest. That's my feeling.

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Speaker 1: Wait, let's talk about that, because that's called there's there's

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Speaker 1: a word for it.

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Speaker 2: It's called biobeting.

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Speaker 3: By the way, another great word, another great word word.

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00:18:38,640 --> 00:18:41,199
Speaker 3: It's like uber ways tender. I mean, it's part of

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Speaker 3: our dictionary.

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Speaker 1: Now, biobating, biobating, I know exactly ghosting, grey walling or whatever,

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Speaker 1: stonewalling or whatever.

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Speaker 3: It's grey rock, gray rock, I got it.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, I remember that because it remind me of

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Speaker 2: like bottle rock. Okay, something like bottle rock, cool vibes,

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Speaker 2: gray rock.

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Speaker 3: I'm going to give you an assignment when we get off,

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Speaker 3: go on to chatty Bet and say, what's the definition

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Speaker 3: of gray rocking. You gotta do it.

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Speaker 2: I'm going to of course, I'm going to.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I love talking to you. I mean just I just

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Speaker 2: get a lot easy.

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Speaker 3: You are.

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Speaker 1: You're just well, but you're also very smart. So it's

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Speaker 1: just like I'm super interested and always what you have

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Speaker 1: to say. So, okay, the biobating. So would you would

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Speaker 1: you change your age?

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Speaker 3: No? I don't let me tell you what I do. Okay,

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Speaker 3: people know my age.

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Speaker 2: I'm just google me, I'm fifty seven. Like it's not

401
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Speaker 2: some big, big like mystery, but.

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Speaker 3: It's it's more than that. Like what about if I'm

403
00:19:30,640 --> 00:19:34,600
Speaker 3: like I hell ski bullshit? Can you imagine we start

404
00:19:34,680 --> 00:19:38,200
Speaker 3: dating this guy's I booked our first trip. We're hell eski. Oh,

405
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Speaker 3: I don't know how to hell skip what? Like you

406
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Speaker 3: can't right? And people lie about big Oh? I love

407
00:19:44,200 --> 00:19:46,159
Speaker 3: to hike. Well, I can't hike the pills. I have

408
00:19:46,200 --> 00:19:49,399
Speaker 3: a torn meniscus. How's that possible? But so what I

409
00:19:49,560 --> 00:19:52,680
Speaker 3: do is right out of the gate. I am exactly

410
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Speaker 3: who I am. So I say, I just want to

411
00:19:54,440 --> 00:19:57,879
Speaker 3: manage your expectations right now. I don't cook. If you

412
00:19:57,960 --> 00:20:00,240
Speaker 3: were looking for Susie homemaker, who's gonna whip up a

413
00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:04,240
Speaker 3: gourmet meal, that's not me, right right? So I do

414
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Speaker 3: the opposite of biobeting. I just put all the unsavory

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Speaker 3: things about me right out there and say, hey, love

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00:20:11,440 --> 00:20:13,320
Speaker 3: me for who I am. We can go out again

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Speaker 3: or we don't. But what you see is what you get.

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Speaker 1: I really love that about you know that these guys

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00:20:19,160 --> 00:20:22,520
Speaker 1: are probably like, she's so hot, it's fine. Resignations, We're fine,

420
00:20:22,520 --> 00:20:26,720
Speaker 1: We're fine. So I wrote a book called The Dangerous

421
00:20:26,720 --> 00:20:30,959
Speaker 1: Age of Novel, which was about me as an editor

422
00:20:31,040 --> 00:20:35,520
Speaker 1: and you know, starting off in New York. And my

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Speaker 1: my editor was like, I really at the time, I

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Speaker 1: was single, and she was like, I really want you

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Speaker 1: to go on dating apps.

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Speaker 2: ID. This is like I' like ten years ago. I'm like,

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Speaker 2: I don't even know what this is.

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Speaker 1: And so I went on a dating app and it

429
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Speaker 1: put my night, my my.

430
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Speaker 2: It put my age as ten years younger.

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Speaker 1: It was on what was it called Bumble Bumble. I

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Speaker 1: put my age is ten years.

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Speaker 3: Younger, automatically, like you put in your age and it already.

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Speaker 2: My age or whatever.

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Speaker 1: I was like, you know, in my forties, but my age,

436
00:21:07,440 --> 00:21:10,800
Speaker 1: and it changed it to my thirties, which I wasn't

437
00:21:10,960 --> 00:21:11,840
Speaker 1: I wasn't mad at.

438
00:21:12,680 --> 00:21:15,520
Speaker 3: No I get it. But that's so interesting, I know.

439
00:21:16,800 --> 00:21:20,479
Speaker 2: And sometimes Hinge does that Toohnjell just is Hanje'll give

440
00:21:20,520 --> 00:21:23,040
Speaker 2: you a different age too. Some people just put it

441
00:21:23,080 --> 00:21:23,960
Speaker 2: in a different age.

442
00:21:24,160 --> 00:21:26,639
Speaker 3: Well how about this. This is really funny. So I

443
00:21:26,680 --> 00:21:30,119
Speaker 3: don't I don't do dating apps, but I have a

444
00:21:30,119 --> 00:21:34,000
Speaker 3: lot of friends where I ghost date app for them.

445
00:21:34,080 --> 00:21:38,280
Speaker 3: So this is really interesting because I will, like some

446
00:21:38,320 --> 00:21:39,880
Speaker 3: of my friends just don't want to do it, So

447
00:21:40,440 --> 00:21:43,440
Speaker 3: I'm doing the dating for them on their dating app,

448
00:21:43,960 --> 00:21:46,840
Speaker 3: But sometimes I'm answering questions as if it's me so

449
00:21:47,000 --> 00:21:49,919
Speaker 3: stupid thing like oh yeah, I love coffee, you know,

450
00:21:50,280 --> 00:21:53,400
Speaker 3: And then my friend then once it looks like it's

451
00:21:53,400 --> 00:21:56,840
Speaker 3: a match, then I will give her phone number to

452
00:21:56,920 --> 00:21:58,560
Speaker 3: the guy, and then they'll be on the phone and

453
00:21:58,640 --> 00:22:01,120
Speaker 3: something random will be like you love coffee, Like what's

454
00:22:01,119 --> 00:22:04,000
Speaker 3: your favorite coffee shop in LA? And she's texted me

455
00:22:04,040 --> 00:22:06,320
Speaker 3: saying I don't drink coffee. Ding Do you know what

456
00:22:06,359 --> 00:22:08,640
Speaker 3: I'm saying, Like I've never had coffee in my life, right,

457
00:22:08,680 --> 00:22:10,800
Speaker 3: So I think that's a version of I guess it's

458
00:22:10,800 --> 00:22:14,880
Speaker 3: a version of biobating to the worst degree because they

459
00:22:14,920 --> 00:22:17,480
Speaker 3: think they're going on a date with her, but really there,

460
00:22:17,520 --> 00:22:19,080
Speaker 3: I guess they're going on a date with me. We

461
00:22:19,160 --> 00:22:21,080
Speaker 3: got to come up with a word for that. Yeah,

462
00:22:21,119 --> 00:22:22,119
Speaker 3: that's a bait and switch.

463
00:22:22,560 --> 00:22:24,800
Speaker 2: That's a bait and switch. That is a bait and switch.

464
00:22:25,160 --> 00:22:27,200
Speaker 3: Yes, well we'll think about that.

465
00:22:27,760 --> 00:22:27,960
Speaker 2: Well.

466
00:22:28,000 --> 00:22:30,239
Speaker 1: You know, it's interesting because my ex fiance I met

467
00:22:30,320 --> 00:22:34,439
Speaker 1: him on hinge and he and my assistant was the

468
00:22:34,440 --> 00:22:36,320
Speaker 1: one that was like, I want you to meet someone

469
00:22:36,320 --> 00:22:38,439
Speaker 1: that's Jewish. I want you to meet someone that's in,

470
00:22:38,960 --> 00:22:41,800
Speaker 1: you know, in that has a has a consistent job.

471
00:22:43,400 --> 00:22:46,119
Speaker 1: And he was the one that put me on the

472
00:22:46,200 --> 00:22:48,680
Speaker 1: dating app and he put me in his ten years

473
00:22:48,720 --> 00:22:50,719
Speaker 1: younger too, and I was like, oh my god. So

474
00:22:51,200 --> 00:22:54,199
Speaker 1: when I met my ex fiancee, he's like, oh, he's like,

475
00:22:54,280 --> 00:22:59,400
Speaker 1: you're so young, and I'm like yeah, I was actually

476
00:22:59,440 --> 00:23:01,160
Speaker 1: like I was, actually you're older than him.

477
00:23:01,720 --> 00:23:05,719
Speaker 3: Look, I think the age fudge is not as offensive

478
00:23:05,920 --> 00:23:08,000
Speaker 3: as like other things, right right, I.

479
00:23:08,000 --> 00:23:09,880
Speaker 1: Mean I think that's like kind of like a white line.

480
00:23:09,960 --> 00:23:11,520
Speaker 1: It's not that big of a deal. I mean for

481
00:23:11,640 --> 00:23:14,040
Speaker 1: some people, like if you're trying to come off as

482
00:23:14,119 --> 00:23:17,560
Speaker 1: like thirty and you're in your mid forties, that's weird.

483
00:23:17,880 --> 00:23:20,280
Speaker 2: But like a couple of years, like who cares botox,

484
00:23:20,400 --> 00:23:21,000
Speaker 2: it kind of work.

485
00:23:21,240 --> 00:23:23,479
Speaker 3: Yeah, opens up your range. It's like when you're pricing

486
00:23:23,480 --> 00:23:26,080
Speaker 3: a house, are you pricing it at ten, nine ninety

487
00:23:26,080 --> 00:23:27,440
Speaker 3: five or eleven?

488
00:23:27,560 --> 00:23:27,760
Speaker 1: Right?

489
00:23:27,880 --> 00:23:30,639
Speaker 3: You want to get both sides of the buyer pool.

490
00:23:31,840 --> 00:23:36,040
Speaker 3: But I think bigger things like saying you're divorced when

491
00:23:36,040 --> 00:23:38,400
Speaker 3: you're just separated, that's a big deal.

492
00:23:38,600 --> 00:23:40,400
Speaker 2: That's I know, that's unacceptable.

493
00:23:40,480 --> 00:23:43,480
Speaker 1: That is like but like fudging on your age a

494
00:23:43,520 --> 00:23:46,000
Speaker 1: little bit. Like it's also super hard to tell how

495
00:23:46,040 --> 00:23:46,960
Speaker 1: old people are too.

496
00:23:47,200 --> 00:23:51,000
Speaker 3: Well, you look sixteen, I mean you look sixteen, but

497
00:23:51,040 --> 00:23:53,840
Speaker 3: in you're you're in your fifties. But I agree with you,

498
00:23:54,720 --> 00:23:56,800
Speaker 3: some people look really good for their age, but I

499
00:23:56,800 --> 00:23:59,960
Speaker 3: think putting up pictures from twenty years ago that's not okay.

500
00:24:00,000 --> 00:24:02,280
Speaker 3: And then you show up at the date and you're like, wait,

501
00:24:02,320 --> 00:24:04,000
Speaker 3: where are you? Oh? Is that your dad?

502
00:24:04,200 --> 00:24:08,040
Speaker 2: Like you know what I'm saying, I totally agree, I

503
00:24:08,080 --> 00:24:10,639
Speaker 2: totally agree. I'm like, so I'm like we're both on

504
00:24:10,680 --> 00:24:11,440
Speaker 2: the same.

505
00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:13,840
Speaker 1: Page where we both like are okay with the age,

506
00:24:13,920 --> 00:24:16,600
Speaker 1: but like all the other nonsense, like if you have

507
00:24:16,680 --> 00:24:19,560
Speaker 1: to be truthful because like again, like someone's like, okay,

508
00:24:19,600 --> 00:24:21,880
Speaker 1: I'm super excited I'm meeting someone and then they're like,

509
00:24:21,880 --> 00:24:24,800
Speaker 1: like you said, like someone's super athletic, and the other

510
00:24:24,840 --> 00:24:26,480
Speaker 1: person's like, I hate sports.

511
00:24:26,720 --> 00:24:27,719
Speaker 2: I am You know.

512
00:24:28,359 --> 00:24:31,800
Speaker 1: That may work, but typically people want to be around

513
00:24:31,880 --> 00:24:33,639
Speaker 1: like like minded I mean, I don't fun.

514
00:24:33,800 --> 00:24:36,120
Speaker 3: You have to have similar interests, right, So if you're

515
00:24:36,200 --> 00:24:37,960
Speaker 3: right out of the gate saying you love certain things

516
00:24:38,000 --> 00:24:40,880
Speaker 3: that you hate and then you're dating, they're like, oh yeah,

517
00:24:40,960 --> 00:24:44,280
Speaker 3: like let's go to the you know, championship this or

518
00:24:44,320 --> 00:24:47,320
Speaker 3: the you know, the national or whatever, and then you're like, oh,

519
00:24:47,359 --> 00:24:51,040
Speaker 3: I hate football, right, it doesn't work. You know. Look,

520
00:24:51,119 --> 00:24:55,640
Speaker 3: I will say overall, it's it's it's such a bummer

521
00:24:55,920 --> 00:25:00,280
Speaker 3: like gone or the days of people meeting out like

522
00:25:00,440 --> 00:25:04,359
Speaker 3: normal or have me How rare is it now sitting

523
00:25:04,400 --> 00:25:07,119
Speaker 3: at a table and you know, just meeting people like

524
00:25:07,160 --> 00:25:09,040
Speaker 3: we did back in the day. I mean, these phones

525
00:25:09,040 --> 00:25:11,800
Speaker 3: have destroyed everything, right.

526
00:25:12,800 --> 00:25:14,560
Speaker 1: You know. Also, what I was just thinking about with

527
00:25:14,600 --> 00:25:18,000
Speaker 1: the biobating is just like trust is such a big thing,

528
00:25:18,200 --> 00:25:21,159
Speaker 1: especially for me, just because I've had I've lived.

529
00:25:20,880 --> 00:25:22,760
Speaker 2: A life of like so much.

530
00:25:23,320 --> 00:25:26,280
Speaker 1: You know, I did not trust any male that I've

531
00:25:26,359 --> 00:25:30,600
Speaker 1: ever been with for obvious reasons for infidelity you know, X,

532
00:25:30,680 --> 00:25:34,639
Speaker 1: Y and Z whatever, and so that's just such a

533
00:25:34,640 --> 00:25:37,479
Speaker 1: big deal. So I think that like the age thing

534
00:25:37,760 --> 00:25:40,400
Speaker 1: doesn't bother me, but everything else, Like if you're it's

535
00:25:40,440 --> 00:25:44,280
Speaker 1: like it's like, if you're going to start lying about

536
00:25:44,640 --> 00:25:46,600
Speaker 1: little things, what about the big things?

537
00:25:46,720 --> 00:25:47,240
Speaker 2: Do you know what I mean?

538
00:25:47,320 --> 00:25:48,800
Speaker 1: Like all of a sudden, like it's just like you're

539
00:25:48,840 --> 00:25:50,880
Speaker 1: just like, oh, it doesn't matter, it's just a lie.

540
00:25:51,160 --> 00:25:51,840
Speaker 2: It matters it.

541
00:25:51,880 --> 00:25:54,760
Speaker 3: Matters, It matters. It's a gateway just to you know,

542
00:25:54,920 --> 00:25:58,200
Speaker 3: kind of, it's a it's a gateway to keep you lying.

543
00:25:58,359 --> 00:26:00,439
Speaker 3: And you know, I'm always trying to teach my children

544
00:26:00,560 --> 00:26:04,440
Speaker 3: like lying to get what you want is not strength,

545
00:26:04,640 --> 00:26:08,320
Speaker 3: it's weakness. Right, you're a dishonest person and you put

546
00:26:08,320 --> 00:26:10,360
Speaker 3: your head on your pillow at night and you're okay

547
00:26:10,400 --> 00:26:13,840
Speaker 3: being left of center and not honest, Like that's just

548
00:26:14,040 --> 00:26:15,760
Speaker 3: that's just who you are. And if you start a

549
00:26:15,840 --> 00:26:18,359
Speaker 3: relationship and a lie, then you're just going to continue

550
00:26:18,400 --> 00:26:22,000
Speaker 3: to lie. It's like who are you? Right? So that's

551
00:26:22,040 --> 00:26:24,360
Speaker 3: why I say I don't cook right out of the gate.

552
00:26:24,840 --> 00:26:27,720
Speaker 3: I'm fun at the table and I'm fun with a cocktail,

553
00:26:27,760 --> 00:26:29,159
Speaker 3: and I love to go out and eat. But I

554
00:26:29,200 --> 00:26:32,480
Speaker 3: will never, never, ever ever be able to even I

555
00:26:32,520 --> 00:26:35,160
Speaker 3: can't eveigure out how to cut an avocado. I bought

556
00:26:35,160 --> 00:26:37,680
Speaker 3: the thing, like you know that, I still can't do it.

557
00:26:47,880 --> 00:26:49,840
Speaker 2: Let's get into the news.

558
00:26:49,520 --> 00:26:53,320
Speaker 3: Oh my god, so sad every day. People split out

559
00:26:53,359 --> 00:26:56,400
Speaker 3: every day every day. And you know what I don't

560
00:26:56,400 --> 00:26:59,600
Speaker 3: know about you. My kids are so desensitized on it.

561
00:26:59,640 --> 00:27:02,159
Speaker 3: Like when I stated, oh, this friend is getting divorced,

562
00:27:02,160 --> 00:27:04,520
Speaker 3: they look at me, they go, doesn't everybody get divorced?

563
00:27:04,520 --> 00:27:08,240
Speaker 1: It's like, no, no, I never wanted to get divorced.

564
00:27:08,280 --> 00:27:10,560
Speaker 2: I mean from my ex husband. I stayed and stayed

565
00:27:10,600 --> 00:27:15,600
Speaker 2: and stayed and stayed and stayed until I was like, I.

566
00:27:14,240 --> 00:27:17,000
Speaker 3: I know, it's so sad. It's just this world, it's

567
00:27:17,040 --> 00:27:19,280
Speaker 3: just so And there was a lot of big ones

568
00:27:19,320 --> 00:27:23,719
Speaker 3: this week. I mean I was surprised by the Nicole kidman.

569
00:27:24,240 --> 00:27:25,240
Speaker 2: So was I.

570
00:27:25,240 --> 00:27:28,160
Speaker 3: I thought they looked really happy. So I guess, don't

571
00:27:28,240 --> 00:27:30,399
Speaker 3: judge a book by its cover. I'm a sucker for that.

572
00:27:30,440 --> 00:27:31,760
Speaker 3: But then I do look at Instagram.

573
00:27:31,880 --> 00:27:34,760
Speaker 1: But they've been together, they've been together for so long,

574
00:27:34,880 --> 00:27:39,480
Speaker 1: and they've been together through so much. Like I just think,

575
00:27:40,200 --> 00:27:45,199
Speaker 1: you know, these long marriages are being you know, literally challenged,

576
00:27:45,440 --> 00:27:48,920
Speaker 1: and you know, are we supposed to be only like five?

577
00:27:49,440 --> 00:27:51,359
Speaker 1: Are the relationships like supposed to be five to ten,

578
00:27:51,640 --> 00:27:55,560
Speaker 1: you know, five to seven years? Like are long relationships over?

579
00:27:56,080 --> 00:27:56,159
Speaker 3: Like?

580
00:27:56,280 --> 00:27:58,600
Speaker 1: I don't want to have a short relationship. My next

581
00:27:58,880 --> 00:28:00,520
Speaker 1: my relationship am I relationship?

582
00:28:00,560 --> 00:28:02,040
Speaker 2: I want to be in it forever.

583
00:28:02,200 --> 00:28:05,359
Speaker 1: I'm tired of like meeting people and like going in

584
00:28:05,400 --> 00:28:06,520
Speaker 1: and out of relationships.

585
00:28:06,560 --> 00:28:07,200
Speaker 2: I don't want that.

586
00:28:07,600 --> 00:28:09,399
Speaker 3: So I think if you if you look at the

587
00:28:09,440 --> 00:28:12,200
Speaker 3: history of like a lot of these long marriages right now,

588
00:28:12,480 --> 00:28:18,160
Speaker 3: they have covered a lot of things, having children, raising children,

589
00:28:18,520 --> 00:28:22,359
Speaker 3: there's been financial you know, navigating careers all that. That's

590
00:28:22,400 --> 00:28:25,720
Speaker 3: a lot, right, That's a lot of texture to a relationship.

591
00:28:26,119 --> 00:28:28,800
Speaker 3: And what we see a lot is and I'm not

592
00:28:28,840 --> 00:28:31,000
Speaker 3: sure of the exact ages of their kids. As you

593
00:28:31,040 --> 00:28:33,000
Speaker 3: see when the kids get old and go to college,

594
00:28:33,160 --> 00:28:38,000
Speaker 3: there's no blue left and people just go their way,

595
00:28:38,280 --> 00:28:40,640
Speaker 3: or you say to yourself, we've made it this far,

596
00:28:41,560 --> 00:28:45,360
Speaker 3: we should just keep on ongoing. But I think for me,

597
00:28:45,480 --> 00:28:49,000
Speaker 3: it's funny. I think I don't know, I have a

598
00:28:49,000 --> 00:28:51,720
Speaker 3: lot of fear about a second marriage because they just

599
00:28:51,960 --> 00:28:55,520
Speaker 3: statistics say that if you've been divorced once, it's pretty

600
00:28:55,560 --> 00:28:59,360
Speaker 3: easy to throw the towel in a second time. And

601
00:28:59,560 --> 00:29:02,120
Speaker 3: here's the bigger issue. I don't know about you. But

602
00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:04,880
Speaker 3: and there's a whole we should do a whole other

603
00:29:04,960 --> 00:29:08,400
Speaker 3: conversation on there's a new type of relationship. There's two

604
00:29:08,480 --> 00:29:10,680
Speaker 3: new type of relationships. But one is I think it's

605
00:29:10,720 --> 00:29:15,440
Speaker 3: called LT eight. It's like married but living apart, right,

606
00:29:15,720 --> 00:29:18,440
Speaker 3: which yeah, kind of interesting. I mean, if you've been

607
00:29:18,480 --> 00:29:21,400
Speaker 3: divorced many years, and you've got used to kind of

608
00:29:21,440 --> 00:29:23,960
Speaker 3: sleeping in your own bed and doing your own thing

609
00:29:24,040 --> 00:29:26,400
Speaker 3: and putting on your own TV shows and all that. Like,

610
00:29:26,720 --> 00:29:28,960
Speaker 3: I don't know, that's kind of hard to then get

611
00:29:29,000 --> 00:29:33,960
Speaker 3: back into a twenty four to seven thing. So when

612
00:29:34,000 --> 00:29:37,280
Speaker 3: you hear about the like part time living together and

613
00:29:37,360 --> 00:29:41,320
Speaker 3: part time not, I think it's I think it's interesting.

614
00:29:41,480 --> 00:29:41,880
Speaker 3: I don't know.

615
00:29:42,360 --> 00:29:44,600
Speaker 2: I think Judith Light she does that. But you know,

616
00:29:46,360 --> 00:29:48,440
Speaker 2: what's the point of being married to someone if you're

617
00:29:48,440 --> 00:29:49,240
Speaker 2: going to be living.

618
00:29:49,000 --> 00:29:52,040
Speaker 3: Apart not all the time? I think I think half

619
00:29:52,080 --> 00:29:52,920
Speaker 3: the week.

620
00:29:53,240 --> 00:29:55,520
Speaker 1: Right, But like my parents, I remember, like when we

621
00:29:55,560 --> 00:29:59,240
Speaker 1: all left or somewhere, were three from Illinois and where

622
00:29:59,280 --> 00:30:01,800
Speaker 1: we all left my they're just traveled with my dad everywhere.

623
00:30:02,680 --> 00:30:05,080
Speaker 1: She just went on every single trip with him, and

624
00:30:05,120 --> 00:30:07,720
Speaker 1: that's how they maintained that stickiness.

625
00:30:08,160 --> 00:30:10,400
Speaker 3: Or when you don't see somebody all the time, there's

626
00:30:10,400 --> 00:30:11,680
Speaker 3: an excitement.

627
00:30:11,560 --> 00:30:15,280
Speaker 2: Right, But not if you've been married fifty No, no.

628
00:30:15,240 --> 00:30:18,040
Speaker 3: I understand. But I'm talking about in this in this

629
00:30:18,160 --> 00:30:22,120
Speaker 3: new kind of world of so much divorce, I mean, good,

630
00:30:22,120 --> 00:30:24,200
Speaker 3: what is it eighty percent or seventy percent of the

631
00:30:24,240 --> 00:30:28,160
Speaker 3: people are divorced, right, and say to yourself on your

632
00:30:28,960 --> 00:30:30,560
Speaker 3: you know, I don't know about you, but like, I

633
00:30:30,600 --> 00:30:37,480
Speaker 3: have a very big life in terms of friends, career, independence, kids.

634
00:30:37,600 --> 00:30:41,160
Speaker 3: You know, a relationship is one slice of the cake,

635
00:30:41,400 --> 00:30:43,719
Speaker 3: whereas back in the day it was our whole world,

636
00:30:44,000 --> 00:30:47,560
Speaker 3: right right, So I don't know how easy it will

637
00:30:47,600 --> 00:30:50,160
Speaker 3: be for me just to be like all in twenty

638
00:30:50,200 --> 00:30:53,600
Speaker 3: four seven when I haven't worked that muscle for so

639
00:30:53,800 --> 00:30:57,080
Speaker 3: long like that, and I still enjoy my girls' dinners

640
00:30:57,120 --> 00:30:58,960
Speaker 3: and my this and my dad. So I don't know

641
00:30:59,040 --> 00:31:01,880
Speaker 3: if I'm the twenty four or seven person. What about

642
00:31:01,920 --> 00:31:05,160
Speaker 3: you when you get back into a significant relationship.

643
00:31:05,760 --> 00:31:09,760
Speaker 1: So, because I've been you know, on my own, raising

644
00:31:09,760 --> 00:31:13,040
Speaker 1: my kids for so long and wearing, you know, for

645
00:31:13,160 --> 00:31:17,360
Speaker 1: being the provider and being the nurturer, I am really

646
00:31:17,440 --> 00:31:20,200
Speaker 1: looking for now that my kids are older, Like, I

647
00:31:21,600 --> 00:31:25,040
Speaker 1: feel so much better about myself. I am more curious

648
00:31:25,160 --> 00:31:27,440
Speaker 1: and more interested in people.

649
00:31:28,400 --> 00:31:29,760
Speaker 2: And you know, before I was.

650
00:31:29,720 --> 00:31:32,040
Speaker 1: Just working and I was I never even asked people

651
00:31:32,040 --> 00:31:34,440
Speaker 1: how they were. It just didn't or if I did,

652
00:31:34,520 --> 00:31:36,280
Speaker 1: it was like a throwaway, like how are you?

653
00:31:36,760 --> 00:31:38,880
Speaker 2: Not? Like now I'm like, hey, how are you?

654
00:31:39,760 --> 00:31:44,400
Speaker 1: I'm just more interested in hearing about what's happening in

655
00:31:44,440 --> 00:31:48,160
Speaker 1: my friends' lives, and you know, obviously very connected to

656
00:31:48,200 --> 00:31:49,160
Speaker 1: my girls.

657
00:31:49,360 --> 00:31:54,600
Speaker 2: And so I really I know that my next marriage

658
00:31:54,680 --> 00:31:58,160
Speaker 2: is going to be the one.

659
00:31:57,280 --> 00:31:59,640
Speaker 1: I also never I know this this sounds really weird,

660
00:31:59,680 --> 00:32:03,320
Speaker 1: but like I've never been in love ever.

661
00:32:03,840 --> 00:32:04,800
Speaker 2: I have like the worst.

662
00:32:04,840 --> 00:32:09,760
Speaker 1: I have such such serious trust issues that I'm always

663
00:32:09,920 --> 00:32:13,560
Speaker 1: like I'm constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop.

664
00:32:13,800 --> 00:32:15,800
Speaker 3: Even in high school and college.

665
00:32:16,600 --> 00:32:18,200
Speaker 1: Well, I mean when I was in high school, I

666
00:32:18,240 --> 00:32:20,520
Speaker 1: was modeling and going to going to and going to

667
00:32:20,560 --> 00:32:22,520
Speaker 1: school like I was you know, I started model when

668
00:32:22,520 --> 00:32:23,120
Speaker 1: I was fifteen.

669
00:32:23,800 --> 00:32:25,880
Speaker 2: So I had like guys that were fun and cute,

670
00:32:25,880 --> 00:32:28,080
Speaker 2: but I wasn't like in love with them.

671
00:32:28,440 --> 00:32:30,720
Speaker 1: I wasn't I mean, i'd puppy love, but I wasn't like,

672
00:32:30,880 --> 00:32:32,440
Speaker 1: oh my god, I can't live without this person.

673
00:32:32,880 --> 00:32:36,040
Speaker 3: Well, when you fall in love cookie you are, it's

674
00:32:36,080 --> 00:32:38,520
Speaker 3: going to knock you off your you know, it's the

675
00:32:38,560 --> 00:32:41,160
Speaker 3: best feeling in the world. It's like the greatest drug.

676
00:32:41,800 --> 00:32:46,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, well I hope. Well I'm looking for it. That's

677
00:32:46,120 --> 00:32:46,480
Speaker 2: not true.

678
00:32:46,520 --> 00:32:49,600
Speaker 1: I'm not looking for love, but I am definitely open

679
00:32:49,760 --> 00:32:52,520
Speaker 1: to being in love with someone. Yes, So do you

680
00:32:52,520 --> 00:32:56,320
Speaker 1: think that Lori Lachlin and Massimo. I'm going to butcher

681
00:32:56,360 --> 00:33:01,240
Speaker 1: his name Guillannuli. I mean, it's been twenty eight years.

682
00:33:01,280 --> 00:33:02,640
Speaker 1: Do you think that there Do you think this is

683
00:33:02,720 --> 00:33:06,240
Speaker 1: just going to be like a little pause or do

684
00:33:06,320 --> 00:33:08,640
Speaker 1: you think do you think that they're going to get

685
00:33:08,680 --> 00:33:09,120
Speaker 1: back together?

686
00:33:09,200 --> 00:33:10,280
Speaker 2: What are your thoughts?

687
00:33:11,400 --> 00:33:14,920
Speaker 3: I hope they get back together. It makes me very

688
00:33:15,040 --> 00:33:19,800
Speaker 3: very sad. I think they've weathered some stuff, and I

689
00:33:19,840 --> 00:33:23,880
Speaker 3: think that they were, you know, partners on some important things,

690
00:33:23,920 --> 00:33:27,360
Speaker 3: and so I was very sad when I read about that.

691
00:33:28,520 --> 00:33:31,520
Speaker 1: I mean, just People magazine says that they've been married

692
00:33:31,520 --> 00:33:34,640
Speaker 1: for twenty eight years. They're living apart, taking a break

693
00:33:34,640 --> 00:33:38,280
Speaker 1: from their marriage. There's no legal proceedings at this time.

694
00:33:38,600 --> 00:33:41,360
Speaker 1: The split comes after the full house Alam and her

695
00:33:41,520 --> 00:33:45,120
Speaker 1: estrange husband listed there eleven eight hundred square foot match

696
00:33:45,200 --> 00:33:47,920
Speaker 1: I hope you were representing that property in Hidden Hills

697
00:33:47,960 --> 00:33:51,640
Speaker 1: for sixteen point five million. The couple purchased it for

698
00:33:51,800 --> 00:33:56,520
Speaker 1: nine Laurie and her husband Masimo pleaded guilty to wire

699
00:33:56,640 --> 00:33:59,640
Speaker 1: fraud and mail fraud, and we're accused of paining five

700
00:33:59,680 --> 00:34:04,920
Speaker 1: from the knowledge for their daughters Olivia, Jade and Isabella Rose.

701
00:34:05,920 --> 00:34:10,200
Speaker 1: Admission to USC and they were Finally, they were falsely

702
00:34:10,239 --> 00:34:13,560
Speaker 1: designated as recruits to the university crew team, even though

703
00:34:13,560 --> 00:34:16,719
Speaker 1: they never participated in these sports, and so Lachlan was

704
00:34:16,760 --> 00:34:21,000
Speaker 1: sentenced to two months in federal prison, while her husband

705
00:34:21,000 --> 00:34:24,160
Speaker 1: received a five month sentence in August of the same year.

706
00:34:24,280 --> 00:34:28,320
Speaker 1: Like how do you go from all of that drama?

707
00:34:28,400 --> 00:34:30,720
Speaker 1: Which is like that that's not like made for TV movie,

708
00:34:30,760 --> 00:34:34,880
Speaker 1: that's like real life bad news Bears, Like how do

709
00:34:34,920 --> 00:34:36,239
Speaker 1: you how do you come back from that?

710
00:34:36,760 --> 00:34:37,000
Speaker 2: Well?

711
00:34:37,080 --> 00:34:41,200
Speaker 3: I kind of look at it like they were partners,

712
00:34:41,239 --> 00:34:44,560
Speaker 3: like Bonnie and Clyde, No decided that, Like I think

713
00:34:44,600 --> 00:34:47,600
Speaker 3: that is that is something that they as a family, right,

714
00:34:47,760 --> 00:34:51,920
Speaker 3: And it's kind of like God forbid, like a couple

715
00:34:51,960 --> 00:34:55,040
Speaker 3: that experiences the death of a child, like that is

716
00:34:55,520 --> 00:34:57,719
Speaker 3: between the that's the two of them, Like it either

717
00:34:57,760 --> 00:35:00,680
Speaker 3: makes you or break to you, they say, Right, I

718
00:35:00,680 --> 00:35:03,600
Speaker 3: think this is at that level. I mean, that's a

719
00:35:03,800 --> 00:35:09,040
Speaker 3: that's a very significant, pivotal, life changing type of a situation.

720
00:35:09,360 --> 00:35:12,560
Speaker 3: And I think I would have looked at it like

721
00:35:12,920 --> 00:35:16,400
Speaker 3: only the two of them, you know, could understand that

722
00:35:16,600 --> 00:35:19,400
Speaker 3: and experience that all of it, even you know, going

723
00:35:19,560 --> 00:35:21,799
Speaker 3: to you know, into the jail tem Like I think

724
00:35:21,800 --> 00:35:25,120
Speaker 3: that would have been like cement, like permanent glue, cement

725
00:35:26,000 --> 00:35:29,680
Speaker 3: to have kept them together. I was very surprised, and

726
00:35:29,719 --> 00:35:31,960
Speaker 3: I was sad about that. I mean, they did their time,

727
00:35:32,680 --> 00:35:35,880
Speaker 3: they did so I don't know, I just I was

728
00:35:35,920 --> 00:35:36,840
Speaker 3: sad about them.

729
00:35:37,000 --> 00:35:40,239
Speaker 1: I guess, like my thought is, after you've been through

730
00:35:40,320 --> 00:35:45,560
Speaker 1: all these different things that are so public and awful

731
00:35:46,400 --> 00:35:51,160
Speaker 1: and you know, really ruined their family culture, is going

732
00:35:51,200 --> 00:35:51,960
Speaker 1: on pause?

733
00:35:52,880 --> 00:35:55,680
Speaker 2: Is that something that is good for the dynamic?

734
00:35:55,800 --> 00:35:57,719
Speaker 1: I mean, I feel like if you're in a situation

735
00:35:57,880 --> 00:35:59,960
Speaker 1: like that, going on pause is just going to be like,

736
00:36:00,320 --> 00:36:04,200
Speaker 1: so now you've you know, you've you've done horrible things

737
00:36:04,239 --> 00:36:06,279
Speaker 1: for your children, You've both have been in prison, you've

738
00:36:06,280 --> 00:36:09,120
Speaker 1: done wirefraud, all these different things, and now you're going

739
00:36:09,200 --> 00:36:11,359
Speaker 1: to separate, and you're going to be like he's going

740
00:36:11,400 --> 00:36:13,720
Speaker 1: to be dating this person, You're gonna be dating that person.

741
00:36:13,880 --> 00:36:15,560
Speaker 2: How do you get back? How do you where do

742
00:36:15,600 --> 00:36:17,319
Speaker 2: you go from there? You know?

743
00:36:17,400 --> 00:36:21,520
Speaker 3: I think sometimes there's enough history and texture with two

744
00:36:21,560 --> 00:36:24,360
Speaker 3: people that they might take a break and then ultimately

745
00:36:24,960 --> 00:36:27,960
Speaker 3: seen people circle back to each other. Maybe they just

746
00:36:28,000 --> 00:36:31,960
Speaker 3: need that pause to kind of get regrouped and then

747
00:36:32,680 --> 00:36:35,840
Speaker 3: kind of circle back. Now I've seen marriages. People split

748
00:36:35,920 --> 00:36:38,720
Speaker 3: up and then they get back together and they reconcile

749
00:36:38,840 --> 00:36:40,960
Speaker 3: me and look at you know, Ben Stiller and his

750
00:36:41,040 --> 00:36:44,960
Speaker 3: wife and it happens. I mean it's interesting. Like I

751
00:36:45,000 --> 00:36:46,960
Speaker 3: think my kids would like flip their shit if all

752
00:36:46,960 --> 00:36:48,520
Speaker 3: of a sudden we got back together. I mean, I

753
00:36:48,640 --> 00:36:50,160
Speaker 3: just think that they would think it was the worst

754
00:36:50,160 --> 00:36:53,239
Speaker 3: thing in the world. But you know, people have done it, right.

755
00:36:53,320 --> 00:36:55,239
Speaker 3: I mean, first of all, it's not easy out there.

756
00:36:55,320 --> 00:36:58,080
Speaker 3: Let's be real. I mean, I mean it's not easy

757
00:36:58,080 --> 00:37:01,759
Speaker 3: out you know, and it's slim pickings and there's you know,

758
00:37:01,880 --> 00:37:06,000
Speaker 3: breadcrumbs of stuff terrible. So sometimes you know, it's like

759
00:37:06,040 --> 00:37:07,960
Speaker 3: the devil you know, is better than the devil you

760
00:37:07,960 --> 00:37:11,080
Speaker 3: don't know, or having some devil. Some people just want somebody.

761
00:37:11,040 --> 00:37:13,280
Speaker 2: Right, just give me a devil.

762
00:37:13,560 --> 00:37:15,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, you go back to the rear view and you're like, okay,

763
00:37:15,719 --> 00:37:19,239
Speaker 3: it's good enough, right. I mean, there are so few

764
00:37:19,320 --> 00:37:21,799
Speaker 3: unicorns out there, and there's I mean, is there any

765
00:37:21,920 --> 00:37:26,560
Speaker 3: unicorn relationship? No, there's not. I mean, bad stuff happens,

766
00:37:27,040 --> 00:37:30,400
Speaker 3: it's just not the other shoe drops. It does. It

767
00:37:30,480 --> 00:37:33,120
Speaker 3: always does. Now you can pick it up, or you

768
00:37:33,120 --> 00:37:36,359
Speaker 3: can put on a different shoe or right, But at

769
00:37:36,360 --> 00:37:38,440
Speaker 3: the end of the day, like it's just what happens.

770
00:37:38,719 --> 00:37:40,719
Speaker 1: I mean, like we went to back to what I

771
00:37:40,760 --> 00:37:42,840
Speaker 1: was talking before. I could just never do that. And

772
00:37:42,960 --> 00:37:46,359
Speaker 1: is in a relationship because trust is everything. I have

773
00:37:46,440 --> 00:37:48,320
Speaker 1: to be able to trust that person one hundred percent.

774
00:37:49,480 --> 00:37:52,040
Speaker 3: Okay, so me too. So that's that's an issue. That's

775
00:37:52,040 --> 00:37:53,600
Speaker 3: an issue for me. Probably a lot of where my

776
00:37:53,680 --> 00:37:57,279
Speaker 3: avoidance stuff comes that. I will very early on on

777
00:37:57,320 --> 00:38:02,239
Speaker 3: a date or in dating say you did you did

778
00:38:02,280 --> 00:38:04,400
Speaker 3: you cheat on your wife? Have you ever cheated before?

779
00:38:04,840 --> 00:38:06,520
Speaker 3: And if they say yes, I will not go out

780
00:38:06,520 --> 00:38:08,880
Speaker 3: with them again because I think once a cheater, always

781
00:38:08,880 --> 00:38:11,040
Speaker 3: a cheater. I love dating on a guy, dating a

782
00:38:11,040 --> 00:38:13,200
Speaker 3: guy who's been cheated on because they know what it's

783
00:38:13,320 --> 00:38:16,120
Speaker 3: like and they and so to me, when I hear that,

784
00:38:16,200 --> 00:38:19,640
Speaker 3: I'm like, yes, you're my guy, right, but I have

785
00:38:19,840 --> 00:38:25,319
Speaker 3: seen cheating firsthand and it doesn't stop. And you take

786
00:38:25,400 --> 00:38:28,400
Speaker 3: your cheating guy back once, it's a license to continue

787
00:38:28,520 --> 00:38:29,720
Speaker 3: to do it period.

788
00:38:30,280 --> 00:38:32,720
Speaker 2: Right, you just said like, here's carpe blanche, go ahead,

789
00:38:32,800 --> 00:38:33,319
Speaker 2: keep doing it.

790
00:38:33,680 --> 00:38:37,120
Speaker 3: I'm okay, yeah, And so I'm with I'm with you

791
00:38:37,160 --> 00:38:39,840
Speaker 3: on I'm with you on that. The cheating is my

792
00:38:41,360 --> 00:38:44,920
Speaker 3: kind of hot button, huge, huge red flag. It's like

793
00:38:45,160 --> 00:38:47,120
Speaker 3: stop in the track, that's a stop sign.

794
00:38:47,760 --> 00:38:50,680
Speaker 2: So what about Keith Urban and you think those guys

795
00:38:50,719 --> 00:38:53,040
Speaker 2: are going to get back? I don't know.

796
00:38:53,239 --> 00:38:58,040
Speaker 3: I mean I think that there's a better chance of

797
00:38:59,120 --> 00:39:04,000
Speaker 3: LORII and Massa than I do with Keith and Nicole.

798
00:39:04,160 --> 00:39:06,200
Speaker 3: I think that was probably in the works for a

799
00:39:06,239 --> 00:39:10,000
Speaker 3: long time, and then they just kind of made the announcement,

800
00:39:10,080 --> 00:39:12,160
Speaker 3: Like didn't some of the articles say they were already

801
00:39:12,280 --> 00:39:17,319
Speaker 3: living separate lives and keep dating and all of that stuff. Yeah, right, then.

802
00:39:17,280 --> 00:39:18,360
Speaker 2: It's been settled, I know.

803
00:39:18,480 --> 00:39:20,080
Speaker 1: But do you think they're going to get back together

804
00:39:20,120 --> 00:39:22,160
Speaker 1: because they've been together for so long?

805
00:39:22,840 --> 00:39:25,440
Speaker 3: I don't know, because for so potentially they were living

806
00:39:25,440 --> 00:39:28,000
Speaker 3: probably more separate lives even when we thought they were

807
00:39:28,000 --> 00:39:30,040
Speaker 3: in their hated right, Like they're on movie sets and

808
00:39:30,360 --> 00:39:32,840
Speaker 3: music tours and you know a lot of that stuff

809
00:39:32,840 --> 00:39:36,000
Speaker 3: which creates kind of distance. I think that's a little

810
00:39:36,000 --> 00:39:40,640
Speaker 3: different than the people that are more in the day

811
00:39:40,680 --> 00:39:44,960
Speaker 3: to day weeds and navigating you know, life and kids

812
00:39:45,000 --> 00:39:47,880
Speaker 3: and money and all that stuff like together.

813
00:39:47,880 --> 00:39:49,080
Speaker 1: I think it'd be so hard to be in a

814
00:39:49,160 --> 00:39:53,160
Speaker 1: relationship like that, where you're with someone that's one reason

815
00:39:53,160 --> 00:39:56,080
Speaker 1: why I'm not interested in dating anyone that's famous, because

816
00:39:56,400 --> 00:39:58,719
Speaker 1: I don't want to be like, left for three months

817
00:39:58,920 --> 00:40:00,959
Speaker 1: four months while they, you know, filming movie.

818
00:40:01,000 --> 00:40:01,839
Speaker 2: I just couldn't do that.

819
00:40:01,920 --> 00:40:04,840
Speaker 3: Well, that's your trust issue, though. What about what about

820
00:40:04,840 --> 00:40:07,320
Speaker 3: long because you'd be worried about their relationships with the coastar,

821
00:40:07,520 --> 00:40:09,600
Speaker 3: which I get I would too, write what about a

822
00:40:09,600 --> 00:40:11,520
Speaker 3: long distance relationship? Would you do that?

823
00:40:11,800 --> 00:40:13,400
Speaker 2: Well, I'm kind of in that right now.

824
00:40:13,680 --> 00:40:14,920
Speaker 3: Oh do tell.

825
00:40:15,239 --> 00:40:17,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, so you know he lives in a different state.

826
00:40:17,840 --> 00:40:19,280
Speaker 3: How many hours away?

827
00:40:19,719 --> 00:40:20,600
Speaker 2: Three and a half hours?

828
00:40:21,080 --> 00:40:23,680
Speaker 3: Is it airplane or are you able to do?

829
00:40:23,960 --> 00:40:24,200
Speaker 2: Live?

830
00:40:24,680 --> 00:40:25,640
Speaker 3: Okay, so it's not terrible.

831
00:40:25,640 --> 00:40:26,919
Speaker 2: It's like going to the Hamptons.

832
00:40:27,200 --> 00:40:30,040
Speaker 3: Oh okay, so that's not as bad as like LA

833
00:40:30,160 --> 00:40:31,879
Speaker 3: dating New York. I mean that, Remember you went out

834
00:40:31,920 --> 00:40:33,160
Speaker 3: that guy who lived in LA.

835
00:40:33,320 --> 00:40:35,680
Speaker 1: Yes, I was just like and I liked him so much,

836
00:40:35,719 --> 00:40:38,719
Speaker 1: I just couldn't. I was like, this is this is impossible.

837
00:40:38,760 --> 00:40:40,319
Speaker 1: We will never be able to date.

838
00:40:40,719 --> 00:40:43,880
Speaker 3: It's exactly, especially with your career, your kids, or your life,

839
00:40:43,880 --> 00:40:46,239
Speaker 3: it's just too hard to have long distance. I agree.

840
00:40:46,880 --> 00:40:49,080
Speaker 3: So am I allowed to ask how you met Was

841
00:40:49,120 --> 00:40:49,880
Speaker 3: this through an app?

842
00:40:50,480 --> 00:40:53,080
Speaker 2: No? I met him through a friend. Can you believe

843
00:40:53,120 --> 00:40:54,840
Speaker 2: that I actually met him through a friend?

844
00:40:55,200 --> 00:40:58,520
Speaker 3: Setups are the best? Yeah, And don't you think it

845
00:40:58,640 --> 00:41:02,239
Speaker 3: all drops in our lap as it should and when

846
00:41:02,280 --> 00:41:04,160
Speaker 3: it should. I always gave this to my friends, like

847
00:41:04,200 --> 00:41:07,320
Speaker 3: why are we forcing an issue? It's gonna the universe

848
00:41:07,360 --> 00:41:09,520
Speaker 3: is going to make it happen at the right time,

849
00:41:09,560 --> 00:41:10,240
Speaker 3: when we're ready.

850
00:41:10,600 --> 00:41:12,399
Speaker 1: It's just funny because I was in such a bad

851
00:41:12,440 --> 00:41:15,359
Speaker 1: place and when he started texting me, I was I

852
00:41:15,400 --> 00:41:16,480
Speaker 1: wasn't really paying attention.

853
00:41:16,800 --> 00:41:19,920
Speaker 2: I was like, what does he want with me? I

854
00:41:19,960 --> 00:41:22,040
Speaker 2: was like, I just am in this awful place.

855
00:41:22,200 --> 00:41:26,000
Speaker 1: Is public, you know, I was cumulated publicly, as cheated on,

856
00:41:26,760 --> 00:41:27,880
Speaker 1: Like I was like, what does he want to do?

857
00:41:27,920 --> 00:41:29,560
Speaker 1: What does he want with me? And he's just been

858
00:41:29,680 --> 00:41:30,360
Speaker 1: so nice.

859
00:41:30,920 --> 00:41:35,759
Speaker 3: It's nice trumps everything, Kelly. People that are devoted and

860
00:41:35,800 --> 00:41:38,920
Speaker 3: they calm our nervous systems and they show up like

861
00:41:39,719 --> 00:41:42,200
Speaker 3: this is what we need. Good for you calm.

862
00:41:41,960 --> 00:41:44,600
Speaker 1: Your nervous system. Yes, that that's what I need. I

863
00:41:44,640 --> 00:41:46,000
Speaker 1: need to be calmed down.

864
00:41:46,080 --> 00:41:49,359
Speaker 3: I don't need to be we don't want to be activated, right,

865
00:41:49,600 --> 00:41:53,680
Speaker 3: And I tend to respond to people who are like

866
00:41:53,840 --> 00:41:57,319
Speaker 3: dopamine hits right, like the activation is exciting to me.

867
00:41:58,040 --> 00:42:02,040
Speaker 3: And and no, that's the piece I got it worked on.

868
00:42:02,120 --> 00:42:04,160
Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying. But I don't know. I'm

869
00:42:04,200 --> 00:42:05,839
Speaker 3: really happy for you. I hope he has a cute

870
00:42:05,840 --> 00:42:06,319
Speaker 3: friend for me.

871
00:42:06,960 --> 00:42:10,239
Speaker 2: Yes, right, No, I mean you got to come to

872
00:42:10,280 --> 00:42:13,080
Speaker 2: New York. I know when I'm an away, I'm definitely

873
00:42:13,120 --> 00:42:15,040
Speaker 2: coming to see. I'm definitely coming to see. Okay, So

874
00:42:15,120 --> 00:42:16,680
Speaker 2: now we have some listener questions.

875
00:42:16,800 --> 00:42:17,800
Speaker 3: These are my favorite.

876
00:42:17,920 --> 00:42:20,920
Speaker 1: I love these, I know, and I was like, but

877
00:42:20,960 --> 00:42:23,720
Speaker 1: there's so everyone on the pod has been so great.

878
00:42:24,120 --> 00:42:27,120
Speaker 2: So here's number one. So it's Denise from Scottsdale.

879
00:42:27,120 --> 00:42:29,160
Speaker 1: She's going, I'm going on my first date since my

880
00:42:29,239 --> 00:42:31,680
Speaker 1: divorce next week and it's been it's a blind date.

881
00:42:31,760 --> 00:42:33,560
Speaker 2: I haven't gone on a date in fifteen years.

882
00:42:33,719 --> 00:42:37,680
Speaker 1: What's a good icebreaker that could spark good conversation.

883
00:42:38,360 --> 00:42:40,239
Speaker 3: I'm going to take a play out of my best

884
00:42:40,239 --> 00:42:44,439
Speaker 3: friend's book, who is the most exactly like, for lack

885
00:42:44,520 --> 00:42:48,400
Speaker 3: of better word, vomits what's in her head? And I

886
00:42:48,440 --> 00:42:50,520
Speaker 3: think it's so refreshing. So she would get there and

887
00:42:50,560 --> 00:42:53,880
Speaker 3: she'd be like, oh my god, my first date in fifteen years.

888
00:42:53,880 --> 00:42:56,880
Speaker 3: Like I'm excited. I'm nervous right there. That breaks the

889
00:42:56,920 --> 00:43:00,640
Speaker 3: ice right instead of coming in as tending that like

890
00:43:00,680 --> 00:43:02,839
Speaker 3: she's like, yeah, I got this, like I've been doing

891
00:43:02,840 --> 00:43:05,120
Speaker 3: this all the time, Like she just kind of says it.

892
00:43:05,360 --> 00:43:12,839
Speaker 3: And that is the way to immediately come in be open, refreshing, vulnerable.

893
00:43:13,000 --> 00:43:16,040
Speaker 3: I mean, come on, a vulnerability piece is super super

894
00:43:16,280 --> 00:43:19,000
Speaker 3: important and authentic piece. So that's what I think she

895
00:43:19,040 --> 00:43:19,440
Speaker 3: should do.

896
00:43:19,960 --> 00:43:22,680
Speaker 1: I love that. I think that's great advice. That is

897
00:43:22,880 --> 00:43:28,240
Speaker 1: that's amazing. Okay, here is another one. Matt from Tampa, Florida.

898
00:43:28,320 --> 00:43:30,640
Speaker 1: We're going all around, all over the map. I've been

899
00:43:30,680 --> 00:43:33,719
Speaker 1: single for six years at having fun. Three months ago

900
00:43:33,880 --> 00:43:37,200
Speaker 1: I got laid off my job. Oh now money's become tight.

901
00:43:37,600 --> 00:43:39,759
Speaker 1: I want to keep dating, but I can't wine and

902
00:43:39,840 --> 00:43:42,279
Speaker 1: dye women right now. What are some cheaper options I

903
00:43:42,320 --> 00:43:44,600
Speaker 1: can try for dates that will still be enjoyable.

904
00:43:45,080 --> 00:43:48,040
Speaker 3: Oh, go to Trader Joe's, get a bottle of wine,

905
00:43:48,160 --> 00:43:50,440
Speaker 3: get some cool glasses, go to the beach and have

906
00:43:50,480 --> 00:43:51,320
Speaker 3: a cocktail like that.

907
00:43:51,840 --> 00:43:52,240
Speaker 2: Easy.

908
00:43:52,719 --> 00:43:57,600
Speaker 3: I want to do that right easy. And the truth is,

909
00:43:57,600 --> 00:44:01,480
Speaker 3: is a girl a girl who who only wants to

910
00:44:01,520 --> 00:44:05,080
Speaker 3: be you know, taken to like the fanciest place. It's

911
00:44:05,120 --> 00:44:08,120
Speaker 3: not his girl. Anyways, he needs a girl who wants

912
00:44:08,160 --> 00:44:10,719
Speaker 3: to go do cool stuff. It doesn't cost money, like

913
00:44:10,800 --> 00:44:13,520
Speaker 3: go pick apples, right, I love that.

914
00:44:13,760 --> 00:44:17,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, and then you're doing something together and like the

915
00:44:17,160 --> 00:44:19,840
Speaker 1: apples fall, and then there's like a funny you know,

916
00:44:20,160 --> 00:44:22,680
Speaker 1: now you have like a story, like like I like

917
00:44:22,760 --> 00:44:28,120
Speaker 1: that farmer's market date, apple picking, pumpkin patch. I like

918
00:44:28,200 --> 00:44:30,879
Speaker 1: the wine I do at the beach that's so good.

919
00:44:30,920 --> 00:44:32,879
Speaker 1: And by the way, Frigio's has great wine too.

920
00:44:33,080 --> 00:44:33,640
Speaker 2: I mean, so.

921
00:44:35,400 --> 00:44:37,000
Speaker 3: It's so easy. Or you can get to beverage is

922
00:44:37,000 --> 00:44:39,879
Speaker 3: the more and get like like on sale, buy one,

923
00:44:39,960 --> 00:44:43,280
Speaker 3: get two free or something. Right, it's so easy.

924
00:44:43,640 --> 00:44:44,160
Speaker 2: I love that.

925
00:44:44,440 --> 00:44:46,319
Speaker 1: All right, So Matt, good luck with that. We were

926
00:44:46,480 --> 00:44:50,480
Speaker 1: rooting for you. Okay, here's Jill from Norco, California.

927
00:44:50,560 --> 00:44:51,279
Speaker 2: My husband of.

928
00:44:51,280 --> 00:44:54,600
Speaker 1: Three years is getting remarried and so pissed off. I

929
00:44:54,680 --> 00:44:57,640
Speaker 1: haven't had a serious relation since they were divorced. Found

930
00:44:57,640 --> 00:45:00,640
Speaker 1: someone right away. Being single sucks. What can I do

931
00:45:00,680 --> 00:45:02,840
Speaker 1: for myself that will make me feel confident being in

932
00:45:02,840 --> 00:45:03,640
Speaker 1: the dating scene?

933
00:45:03,680 --> 00:45:06,120
Speaker 3: Oh, let me tasting. I love this question. Okay, she's

934
00:45:06,160 --> 00:45:09,760
Speaker 3: got to get less angry. Okay, she has to clean

935
00:45:09,840 --> 00:45:12,840
Speaker 3: up how she's feeling on the inside, so the energy

936
00:45:12,960 --> 00:45:17,160
Speaker 3: that she is giving off will be open and inviting

937
00:45:17,320 --> 00:45:20,359
Speaker 3: and warm to people that she wants to go on dates.

938
00:45:20,440 --> 00:45:23,239
Speaker 3: It because right there you're reading this, she actually needs

939
00:45:23,239 --> 00:45:25,240
Speaker 3: to probably do a drug journey and do a Roto

940
00:45:25,280 --> 00:45:27,360
Speaker 3: Router of how she's feeling on the inside, and the

941
00:45:27,400 --> 00:45:30,719
Speaker 3: minute she cleans all that up, she'll she'll be fine.

942
00:45:30,760 --> 00:45:33,239
Speaker 3: She's got to stop focusing on his backyard and worry

943
00:45:33,239 --> 00:45:33,719
Speaker 3: about her.

944
00:45:33,600 --> 00:45:38,200
Speaker 2: Own love that we goes for it. I totally agree.

945
00:45:38,280 --> 00:45:41,560
Speaker 1: And I also think that, like one thing that happens

946
00:45:41,600 --> 00:45:43,080
Speaker 1: with a lot of women is that when they do

947
00:45:43,600 --> 00:45:45,719
Speaker 1: when they do it, when they're going to a breakup.

948
00:45:45,400 --> 00:45:48,520
Speaker 2: They cut their hair. Do not cut your hair. Collar

949
00:45:48,600 --> 00:45:49,240
Speaker 2: your hair.

950
00:45:49,200 --> 00:45:53,319
Speaker 1: Like go blonder, be go brunette like Carrie Bradshaw did.

951
00:45:53,360 --> 00:45:54,759
Speaker 2: But do not cut your hair.

952
00:45:55,200 --> 00:45:58,880
Speaker 3: She looks great, she never looks better. Yeah, game changer

953
00:45:58,920 --> 00:45:59,520
Speaker 3: her hair cut.

954
00:46:00,120 --> 00:46:05,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, Pam Anderson also looks great. Just so yeah, but yeah,

955
00:46:05,239 --> 00:46:07,480
Speaker 1: do not cut your hair. That's like an absolute noe.

956
00:46:08,160 --> 00:46:08,520
Speaker 2: Okay.

957
00:46:08,560 --> 00:46:11,840
Speaker 1: Shannon from Boise, Idaho, I'm on my third marriage and

958
00:46:11,880 --> 00:46:14,319
Speaker 1: I finally found my person. I'm sixty three and my

959
00:46:14,400 --> 00:46:16,480
Speaker 1: husband I have a healthy sex life, okay, get it.

960
00:46:17,120 --> 00:46:19,640
Speaker 1: I know, like whoa okay, but it feels very routine

961
00:46:19,680 --> 00:46:22,920
Speaker 1: and boring. Oh okay, how can I make it more interesting?

962
00:46:22,920 --> 00:46:25,200
Speaker 1: And how can I talk about it with him without

963
00:46:25,320 --> 00:46:26,600
Speaker 1: hurting his feelings?

964
00:46:26,920 --> 00:46:29,759
Speaker 3: First of all, it's all about presentation. She has to

965
00:46:29,760 --> 00:46:33,040
Speaker 3: save him, like how amazing that it's sixty three We're

966
00:46:33,040 --> 00:46:36,799
Speaker 3: still having sex like regularly. Then she should say how

967
00:46:36,840 --> 00:46:40,400
Speaker 3: fun would it be? I can wear a wig Betsy underwear.

968
00:46:41,000 --> 00:46:43,680
Speaker 3: You know, we can go you know, somewhere like public.

969
00:46:43,719 --> 00:46:45,839
Speaker 3: I mean, are you the fact that she comes from

970
00:46:45,880 --> 00:46:49,600
Speaker 3: the place of saying like we're winning, like at sixty three,

971
00:46:49,880 --> 00:46:53,600
Speaker 3: we want to have sex still the world is our oyster?

972
00:46:53,960 --> 00:46:56,440
Speaker 2: Wait? Public? Like in the I got a public bathroom?

973
00:46:56,640 --> 00:47:01,560
Speaker 3: What do you make a bucket list? That's hotously go

974
00:47:01,560 --> 00:47:02,880
Speaker 3: to be I mean we used to do it on

975
00:47:02,920 --> 00:47:05,759
Speaker 3: trips in high school and Hawaii when it was dark

976
00:47:05,840 --> 00:47:07,680
Speaker 3: on a beach to knock it out, Like they can

977
00:47:07,760 --> 00:47:11,600
Speaker 3: do it too, right, go to a park like it's

978
00:47:11,640 --> 00:47:14,680
Speaker 3: so fun. Good for them? I mean, honestly good for them.

979
00:47:14,880 --> 00:47:16,600
Speaker 2: I know, like, what is she complaining about? She's having

980
00:47:16,600 --> 00:47:17,080
Speaker 2: a good time?

981
00:47:18,440 --> 00:47:20,560
Speaker 3: Does he even need VIAGRAA? I mean, come on, this

982
00:47:20,640 --> 00:47:21,320
Speaker 3: is amazing.

983
00:47:22,200 --> 00:47:24,320
Speaker 2: I think people get rested though when they're at parks

984
00:47:24,440 --> 00:47:25,880
Speaker 2: having sex, So I don't know, there should.

985
00:47:25,640 --> 00:47:27,600
Speaker 3: Be no no. I mean, I think this world is

986
00:47:27,640 --> 00:47:29,640
Speaker 3: so uptight, so I think they just need to go

987
00:47:29,719 --> 00:47:35,239
Speaker 3: have fun, you know, or doing in a car, seriously

988
00:47:35,360 --> 00:47:37,960
Speaker 3: doing a car, go go park on a street after dinner.

989
00:47:38,080 --> 00:47:40,479
Speaker 3: I mean, there's so many fun things to.

990
00:47:40,440 --> 00:47:41,840
Speaker 2: Do, everybody.

991
00:47:41,960 --> 00:47:45,879
Speaker 3: We got a lightning. After we got a lightning, right,

992
00:47:47,200 --> 00:47:49,520
Speaker 3: do something out of the box if you want change,

993
00:47:49,840 --> 00:47:50,640
Speaker 3: be changed.

994
00:47:51,280 --> 00:47:58,719
Speaker 2: Oh oh my drop. I love that we've covered so

995
00:47:58,880 --> 00:47:59,520
Speaker 2: much today.

996
00:48:00,200 --> 00:48:01,399
Speaker 3: Thank you, we always do.

997
00:48:01,440 --> 00:48:03,160
Speaker 2: We always have the best time together.

998
00:48:03,280 --> 00:48:06,160
Speaker 1: I love seeing you, hearing where you are in your

999
00:48:06,200 --> 00:48:09,319
Speaker 1: life and you're always bringing such a unique and cool

1000
00:48:09,400 --> 00:48:12,240
Speaker 1: perspective to these conversations. And thank you listeners for sending

1001
00:48:12,239 --> 00:48:15,080
Speaker 1: in those questions. Do you have a question you want

1002
00:48:15,160 --> 00:48:18,080
Speaker 1: us to answer, then the podcast is for you, so

1003
00:48:18,280 --> 00:48:21,239
Speaker 1: call us or email us. All all the information is

1004
00:48:21,320 --> 00:48:24,359
Speaker 1: in the show notes, follow us on socials, and make

1005
00:48:24,400 --> 00:48:27,839
Speaker 1: sure you rate and review the podcast. I do Part

1006
00:48:27,880 --> 00:48:32,239
Speaker 1: two an iHeartRadio podcast where falling in love is the

1007
00:48:32,280 --> 00:48:35,320
Speaker 1: main objective.