Speaker 1: Welcome to Creature feature production of I Heart Radio. I'm
Speaker 1: your host of Many Parasites, Katie Golden. I studied psychology
Speaker 1: and evolutionary biology in school, and today on the show,
Speaker 1: I wanna knows what we're talking about. I knows what
Speaker 1: we're talking about. It's noses. We're getting to know some
Speaker 1: of the most fascinating noses in the animal kingdom, from
Speaker 1: a fantastical cryptod to the real life incredible noses that
Speaker 1: you couldn't make up. Discover this more as we answer
Speaker 1: the angel question why are bats? I mean, why are
Speaker 1: why are bats? Joining me today to get nosy our
Speaker 1: podcasters and comedians David Bell and Hannah Michael's welcome. Hello, Hey,
Speaker 1: how are you? I'm good. How are you guys? I'm
Speaker 1: quite well, I'm sleepy. Well, yeah, you guys? Are you guys?
Speaker 1: Are you like cryptids? Right? That's correct? Yep, Rather I do,
Speaker 1: and I made you that's correct. I don't not like cryptids.
Speaker 1: I've watched a lot of the X Files, right, I
Speaker 1: think you guys, aren't. You aren't quite at the level
Speaker 1: of you are blogging about it seven swearing that by
Speaker 1: God you will have your revenge on Bigfoot if it's
Speaker 1: the last thing you do. But you're between that and
Speaker 1: being like uninterested nonbelievers, encrypted right, It's it's somewhere between there. Right. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I would say I don't believe in most of them,
Speaker 1: but that's part of my fascination. Right, That's part of
Speaker 1: what makes Bigfoot cool is that, like Bigfoot is our
Speaker 1: reckoning with where we came from. Yeah, we were nothing
Speaker 1: but mammals. So let's do it like we do it
Speaker 1: on the Discovery Channel. Exactly, exactly. Yeah, But I want
Speaker 1: to talk to you guys about a very special cryptid
Speaker 1: when it comes to evolutionary biology, called the nosewalker cryptids
Speaker 1: or rhino Graddentsha. So I've never heard of these. I'm
Speaker 1: so excited. Yes. So they are a group of animals
Speaker 1: that German zoologist Gerald Steiner created or are they secretly
Speaker 1: real and the FBI just doesn't want us to know? Okay? Now,
Speaker 1: they were invented with the intention of being very silly
Speaker 1: but to mimic serious scientific description. In fact, Steiner's descriptions
Speaker 1: of these animals are so formal sounding and so scientific
Speaker 1: that they have been accidentally republished as real animals by
Speaker 1: unwitting journalists and people who will sometimes mistakenly believe they're real,
Speaker 1: even though they are absolutely ridiculous. So Steiner wrote the
Speaker 1: book The snow Form in Life of the Rhino Grades,
Speaker 1: in which he describes a hundred and thirty fake species
Speaker 1: of snouters and loving fake scientific details. I love it.
Speaker 1: So wait, this is just a maniac Yeah, okay, most
Speaker 1: crypt did start with just some maniac We just did Luckness.
Speaker 1: That was definitely a maniac. Yeah, well there was the
Speaker 1: family who saw it across the road and then and
Speaker 1: then it became a maniac um. He thinks Hitler killed Lackness.
Speaker 1: It sounds correct. Damn it like that sounds like something
Speaker 1: Hitler would do. I'm very tired just in general. Actually,
Speaker 1: I think this book was published in nineteen fifty seven,
Speaker 1: you know, the wild and crazy fifties, when we just
Speaker 1: made up animals for fun. Like this was before we
Speaker 1: had video games, so we had to write entire books
Speaker 1: about made up animals in order to have a time.
Speaker 1: But Steiner wrote, it was an entire book that describes
Speaker 1: a hundred and thirty eight fake species of snouters in
Speaker 1: loving fake scientific detail. Why well, have you ever looked
Speaker 1: at the Star Wars wiki and seen how detailed people
Speaker 1: go on and on about like batt O Grito, the
Speaker 1: Star Wars fictional thing, where like the entire biology of boards.
Speaker 1: It's fun. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. Well, when I
Speaker 1: was a kid, I actually created a entire species of
Speaker 1: animals called zooks that were tiny, like microscopic creatures that
Speaker 1: were like these little bipedal ants like things that had
Speaker 1: little antenna that had like a big orb on each
Speaker 1: end of the antenna. And I wrote out this whole
Speaker 1: like like booklet about like they can lift weight up
Speaker 1: to five hundred thousand times their own their own weight,
Speaker 1: and they communicate by rubbing their orbs together and all
Speaker 1: of this stuff, and like they can control electricity. And
Speaker 1: like some kid in my class found this and I
Speaker 1: was like in second grade or something, and he's like,
Speaker 1: this isn't real. These are lies. I was like, no,
Speaker 1: it's real, it's not lies. And then he showed it
Speaker 1: to the assistant teacher and the teacher made me admit
Speaker 1: it was lies. M You're not You're not still bitter
Speaker 1: about this though, right, not at all? David. You know
Speaker 1: you're describing what George Lucas did with medic Clarian's right, right,
Speaker 1: that they control all energy and they're being microscopic. George
Speaker 1: Lucas scooped second grade. Me. I just can't believe like this.
Speaker 1: This assistant teacher was like, you have to admit that.
Speaker 1: Stop using your imagination, admit that it's lying. Being creative
Speaker 1: is lying. Yep, that sounds like teachers. It does. I
Speaker 1: went to a religious school. Yeah. It. It just made
Speaker 1: me dig in more. It's like, fine, I'm gonna I'm
Speaker 1: gonna create war lines. What if that teacher was like
Speaker 1: George Lucas in disguise, Yeah, going school to school and disguise,
Speaker 1: getting ideas or the FBI inserted into the school to
Speaker 1: prevent us from finding the truth about zooks exactly. But yeah,
Speaker 1: So in this book, the snouters form in life with
Speaker 1: the rhino grades uh, he describes a d species that's
Speaker 1: commitment to the bit. Generally speaking, these fake species are
Speaker 1: described as mouse like creatures with vestigial nubs for back legs,
Speaker 1: and its four limbs have been modified for grasping, and
Speaker 1: they have They all share in common a weirdly versatile
Speaker 1: nose called ansarium, which is a made up word but
Speaker 1: sounds science. E it sounds pretty science. Yeah, sounds n storium.
Speaker 1: M hmm, I would mistake that for science. Yeah, it
Speaker 1: sounds like a fancy room of a mansion. This is
Speaker 1: the nice storium where we have cocaine exactly. So. Some
Speaker 1: of these fake species walks with their nose, which is
Speaker 1: will be a long leg like appendage with a weird
Speaker 1: duck like foot on the end, or a claw, which
Speaker 1: there have been loving illustrations of these that are incredible.
Speaker 1: In fact, there have been fake taxidermis of these that
Speaker 1: you can look up. I'll provide some of them in
Speaker 1: the show notes, and they are absolutely wonderful. I mean,
Speaker 1: it's just like, so it's so weird. It's like this
Speaker 1: weird mouse with giant ears and then a long leg
Speaker 1: for a nose with like a weird duck foot or
Speaker 1: a claw, and I just it's it's all. It's all fake.
Speaker 1: But I of how committed people are to try and
Speaker 1: I guess to trick people. I'm not sure. I don't
Speaker 1: think that's the intention. I think it's sort of a
Speaker 1: loving thing. It's sort of like the jackalope, Like people
Speaker 1: make like fake busts of jackalopes. But then it's really
Speaker 1: sad because you realize the first few sightings of jackal
Speaker 1: opes are just like rabbits with HPV. Yeah, no, there's
Speaker 1: a real rabbit disease that causes these bunnies to have
Speaker 1: these huge growths, these horn like growths from in bunny
Speaker 1: HPV type virus uh that creates these facial tumors. And
Speaker 1: it does look sometimes like antlers. Sometimes it looks like
Speaker 1: they have antlers coming out all over their face, which
Speaker 1: is quite horrifying. But yeah, no, you're absolutely right, Like
Speaker 1: that's I agree that. I think that's probably where the
Speaker 1: jackalope myth comes from. I mean, either that or some
Speaker 1: redneck was bored, which is where a lot of these
Speaker 1: six come from. Look, you know, I mean they did
Speaker 1: think that when the guy who discovered the platypus brought in,
Speaker 1: they thought it was just some some guy who like
Speaker 1: sewed a bunch of animal parts together. So they must
Speaker 1: have experienced other people doing that, just sewing animal parts together.
Speaker 1: Of course, they protopuses are so weird. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: They have poisonous barbs on their feet. They have a
Speaker 1: third eye. What what is elector location? I still don't know. Yeah,
Speaker 1: they sweat milk. We're going to talk about electro reception.
Speaker 1: Later on in the show. But yeah, they don't have nipples.
Speaker 1: They sweat milk out of their bellies. My favorite fact
Speaker 1: about platypus they are the original Like that that I
Speaker 1: wonder if the person who you know those nineties gatorade ats,
Speaker 1: I wonder if they just like saw a platypus. Yeah,
Speaker 1: where people are sweating gatorade. That is I like that
Speaker 1: that it's like a platypus DNA that we would be
Speaker 1: able to sweat gatorade to feed our young What if
Speaker 1: platypuses are where we're heading like evolutionarily speaking, Like, what
Speaker 1: if it's not that they're weird, it's just that they're
Speaker 1: they're the answer right, Well, we'd be we'd be going back.
Speaker 1: We'd be going back to laying eggs, know what, or
Speaker 1: we're going forward to laying eggs. Maybe laying eggs is
Speaker 1: very efficient. But also if you like also sweat milk
Speaker 1: and have weird, weird bills. And here's the thing, we're
Speaker 1: too smart to lay eggs. We need some sort of
Speaker 1: um motivation to have kids. That's why sex feels good. Sure,
Speaker 1: but eggs are delicious of our unfertilized eggs, and we
Speaker 1: would stop propagating like you'd be like, I'm going to
Speaker 1: keep one. Okay, there is that if we evolved to
Speaker 1: have eggs again, that we would just our species would
Speaker 1: die out because we would make omelets out of all
Speaker 1: of our own human eggs. I mean, I don't understand
Speaker 1: why people have kids, so this could be my not
Speaker 1: did I'll let's stick a pin in that thought about
Speaker 1: the end of the human race. Uh, back to the snouters.
Speaker 1: Some of these species will use their okay, the fake species.
Speaker 1: I have to keep saying fake species otherwise someone's going
Speaker 1: to make a comment about like Katie Golden's Katie Golden
Speaker 1: spreading lies again. Um. They sometimes use their noses like
Speaker 1: a weird branching membrane that comes out of their nose
Speaker 1: to catch fish like a net. Some have giant ears
Speaker 1: that they flap around and fly with, and they use
Speaker 1: their nose as a rudder to steer, and some even
Speaker 1: have multi pronged noses that they used to walk on.
Speaker 1: And I have very magnanimously provided you guys with pictures
Speaker 1: of all of these interesting fake animals. Some of them
Speaker 1: are some of them are probably using real animal parts
Speaker 1: of fake taxidermy, which is cool. Some of the shrews. Yeah, well,
Speaker 1: cryptids are always horrifying for animals, right, Like it's just
Speaker 1: people hacking up animals we time. Yeah, yeah, often, Yeah,
Speaker 1: this one's awesome. Yeah. What year I need to know though,
Speaker 1: because of the ears and the rudder one? What year
Speaker 1: did Dumbo come out? Oh, that's a good question. So
Speaker 1: the book the Snatters came out in nineteen fifty seven,
Speaker 1: Dumbo the movie came out. Now not the tim Burton,
Speaker 1: damn it. No one's looking up the tim Burton. No,
Speaker 1: so God Disney is going to sue the crap out
Speaker 1: of this, poor Germans. Yeah so, I mean, but I
Speaker 1: think that the whole like using using giant ears to
Speaker 1: fly sort of a a classic kind of like I
Speaker 1: think they were like these old beastiary books way in
Speaker 1: the medieval times when they would speculate all these hilarious
Speaker 1: things about animals of like, oh, yeah, well this animals
Speaker 1: got bigger, so they use it to fly? Why not?
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, oh yeah. You'd see something once and then
Speaker 1: you'd commissioned an artist to draw it and be like
Speaker 1: close enough, and then an elephant is basically just a
Speaker 1: cow with a big nose and mad eyes. Yep. Did
Speaker 1: you ever go to the Best Area exhibit at LACMA
Speaker 1: It was I did. It's amazing, amazing. I love it.
Speaker 1: I love the there's the My favorite one is the
Speaker 1: cow that parts flames. What's that called? The cow? It's oh,
Speaker 1: it's got a name an somewhere as dragon. It is
Speaker 1: an ast dragon. I have to look up the name.
Speaker 1: Could they possibly have named it the Bonacon? That's right? Okay, yeah,
Speaker 1: Actually I think we talked about this like years ago
Speaker 1: on the podcast The Bonacon. It's a it's a cow
Speaker 1: that spews flames out of it. But which is funny
Speaker 1: because there are actually like there's the Bombardier beetle that
Speaker 1: sprays hot caustic uh chemicals out of its But oh,
Speaker 1: was this was this medieval crazy person accidentally predicting global warming? Sure,
Speaker 1: let's say that it's more fun a time traveler trying
Speaker 1: to put global warming in a way that wouldn't get
Speaker 1: them burned as a witch back in the day. Exactly,
Speaker 1: it sounds right. As strange as these mythical rhino grades are,
Speaker 1: they're really not far off from how incredible animal noses
Speaker 1: can be. Take the star nosed mole who has a
Speaker 1: multi pronged nose that looks like a mini legged starfish.
Speaker 1: Each of these fleshy protuberances helps the blind mole since
Speaker 1: vibrations underground to hunt down worms and insects, and as
Speaker 1: well soon discuss there are animals who are us as
Speaker 1: strange as what the imagination can come up with when
Speaker 1: it comes to noses. Who was the first animal to
Speaker 1: develop a sense of smell? Probably something like Lancelet, a weird,
Speaker 1: warm like marine animal who almost looks like a fish,
Speaker 1: but it's not quite a fish. It's sort of a
Speaker 1: pre fish with a notochord, a bundle of nerves that
Speaker 1: runs down its back instead of a spinal cord, a
Speaker 1: mouth but no jaws, and eye spots instead of eyeballs,
Speaker 1: and of course it's got its fair share of tentacles
Speaker 1: around its head. They have no nose to really speak of,
Speaker 1: but they are the most ancient animal known to have
Speaker 1: old factory receptors smell cells that run along its body.
Speaker 1: Not quite the sophistication of a pair of nostrils as
Speaker 1: fish would develop, but starting to get there. So, guys,
Speaker 1: I feel like when we think about fish, we don't
Speaker 1: really think about their noses. It's no oversight I think
Speaker 1: we think about our noses and just imagine that they
Speaker 1: wouldn't work underwater, and kind of just assume fish don't
Speaker 1: have them. Maybe. Yeah, I've definitely pictured a fish with
Speaker 1: a human nose before. Just for fun, I texted you
Speaker 1: a photo of a star nose small by the way,
Speaker 1: because they look like they exploded. Yeah, they look like
Speaker 1: they had a cartoon cigar, Yes, a cartoon exploding cigar
Speaker 1: and it burst their face or they ran too fast
Speaker 1: into a wall and its smoothed their their nose. I
Speaker 1: used to beg my parents for one. Um, oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: they can just get you a star nosemall. Yeah, I'm sure,
Speaker 1: I'm sure it's fine. They were holding out on you. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but yeah, no, we don't think about fish having noses.
Speaker 1: I mean, like you said, like if we tried to
Speaker 1: breathe or smell underwater, we couldn't. We would drown. H
Speaker 1: And yeah, I mean thinking about out of fish with
Speaker 1: a human nose, by the way, that I feel like
Speaker 1: that is my sleep paralysis demon, just like the nose
Speaker 1: standing over me. We have found a way to come
Speaker 1: to land. Now we will drag you underwater. But you know,
Speaker 1: fish do have nostrils. You've seen a fish, You've seen
Speaker 1: a couple of little little nostril holes. Uh, And they do,
Speaker 1: in fact smell out of those those little nose holes.
Speaker 1: So smell is actually a really important since for a
Speaker 1: fish because they have to use it to hunt for
Speaker 1: food or to avoid predation. But you know, for most fish,
Speaker 1: it's just like a couple of little nostril holes. And
Speaker 1: we are going to talk about a fish who does
Speaker 1: not go for subtlety when it comes to their face parts.
Speaker 1: So a unicorn fish is exactly what it sounds like.
Speaker 1: It's a real life unicorn in the form of a
Speaker 1: tropical fish who lives in the Indo Pacific Ocean. So
Speaker 1: this is also known as a nasal fish, which I
Speaker 1: think I like unicorn fish better. They are a genus
Speaker 1: of fish species with what looks like a long quote nose,
Speaker 1: So it's technically not a nose. It is a rostral protruberance,
Speaker 1: which isn't I like that rostral protuberance. It's a fleshy
Speaker 1: horn extension of their forehead. But it looks like the
Speaker 1: fish has a dangle nose. It really does. Yeah, it
Speaker 1: looks like a fish with a with a dainty as
Speaker 1: nose here, very long, very long, dainty nose. Yeah, like
Speaker 1: a long, thin nose, very serious looking fish. The fish
Speaker 1: looks offended, right, it looks snooty. And maybe I think
Speaker 1: it is because of the nose. It's like when once
Speaker 1: you have a nose to look down on it, I
Speaker 1: feel like you kind of look snody. Yeah, the fish
Speaker 1: looks like I'm met at the fish for having more
Speaker 1: money than me. Yeah, and I don't think I don't
Speaker 1: think that's accurate, but I want to rob the fish.
Speaker 1: It looks like Mr Burns. It looks like Mr Burns does. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it absolutely does. These fish range from tan coloration to
Speaker 1: cool colors like purpleish pink blue. Sometimes they're white. Sometimes
Speaker 1: they have fetching little red freckles and blue lipstick. So
Speaker 1: that nose really isn't a nose at all. It serves
Speaker 1: no nasal function and it is not attached to their nostrils.
Speaker 1: So unicornfish is very accurate title it is. It's just
Speaker 1: a fleshhorn coming out of their forehead. So I do
Speaker 1: want to go into a bit about why fish don't
Speaker 1: have human noses, Like have you ever asked yourself that question? Like, Hey,
Speaker 1: why don't a fish just have a nose like I have.
Speaker 1: You know, they just have these little nostrils, but they
Speaker 1: never have like a full on human humanoid nose. They don't.
Speaker 1: They don't. They also like don't have any kind of
Speaker 1: mammalian nose. They don't have like a cat nose or
Speaker 1: a dog nose like a cow knows. I know, now
Speaker 1: it's cute. It's because it's horrifying. What it's a human nose?
Speaker 1: Why is that? It's like a human nose on a
Speaker 1: fish frightens and confuses me. But like a cat knows
Speaker 1: on a fish, it's cute. Now. I would argue that
Speaker 1: a fleshy human nose on any animal would be frightening, right,
Speaker 1: there's no animal that would be improved by a human nose. Well,
Speaker 1: it's it's the same reason a lot of cryptics are
Speaker 1: human parts on animals, that it horrifies us to come
Speaker 1: face to face with the fact that we're just animals
Speaker 1: and to put ourselves onto other species. The idea that
Speaker 1: maybe someone down the line had sex with an animal,
Speaker 1: I think you're thinking more into it than people who
Speaker 1: come up. I'm not sure anyone. I think that might
Speaker 1: be a youth thing. Dave okay, ok of make a note,
Speaker 1: but yeah, it's very uncanny valley once she starts sticking
Speaker 1: human parts on an animal. There was a children's book
Speaker 1: that I'm just remembering right now where it was like
Speaker 1: about these cats, cat like creatures that would walk on
Speaker 1: their hind legs, but for whatever reason, the artists decided
Speaker 1: to give them full on human noses, and it scared
Speaker 1: the dickens out of me. Nightmares. That's freaking When walks
Speaker 1: on her hind legs, it already freaks me up. She
Speaker 1: walks through the house on her hind legs, just how
Speaker 1: do you? How do humans? Yeah, just casually on her
Speaker 1: way to the litter box, like just a little rolled
Speaker 1: up newspaper under tucked under her arms, just like gott
Speaker 1: to keep up with the world affairs, little cat newspaper
Speaker 1: the news. Let's check out the muse for today. L
Speaker 1: O L perfect. But so fish, why don't they have noses?
Speaker 1: What the heck? Are they just too good for noses?
Speaker 1: Because they have nostrils. Well, so, the nose does a
Speaker 1: lot of great work in protecting us in our terrestrial environment,
Speaker 1: and it is we actually use our noses for breathing,
Speaker 1: and it's connected to our lungs and throat, and so
Speaker 1: it's important to filter out air impurities with these little
Speaker 1: hairs inside of our noses, as well as to heat
Speaker 1: up the air before it hits our lungs. And I'll
Speaker 1: go into more detail about that later. But fish, on
Speaker 1: the other hand, do not use their nostrils to breathe.
Speaker 1: It's just to smell. So the they're basically like pumping
Speaker 1: water in and out of their nostrils just to capture
Speaker 1: some smells with their old factory receptors, whereas their breathing
Speaker 1: is done through their mouth and their guilts, So they
Speaker 1: pump water in through their mouth and then through their gills.
Speaker 1: So yeah, then there those little nostrils really have nothing
Speaker 1: to do with breathing, just for sniff in the water.
Speaker 1: So you're saying, I'm a fish, Are you a mouth breather?
Speaker 1: I can't. My nose is just decorative at this point.
Speaker 1: It's I can't smell anything allergy. It's yeah, I I
Speaker 1: apparently you can't say I lost my sense of smell anymore.
Speaker 1: People freak out, but that COVID Yeah, yeah, yeah, no,
Speaker 1: I just fine. I lost it like five years ago.
Speaker 1: That said, I mean having the ability to breathe separately
Speaker 1: than smell is would be a godsend, right, Yeah, you
Speaker 1: kidding for the bad smells. I'm very sensitive to smells,
Speaker 1: and sometimes I like get close to passing out because
Speaker 1: I just refused to breathe when there's a bad smell. Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's just like I don't want the bad smells in
Speaker 1: in in my face, inside my nose. You know, it
Speaker 1: can be so strong you can almost taste it because
Speaker 1: they're exactly and like breathing through your mouth can help
Speaker 1: a little bit. Then it's just like, now the bad
Speaker 1: poop smells are getting in my mouth and I don't
Speaker 1: like that. I don't like that idea at all. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it would be nice to be a fish then, so
Speaker 1: you get to just poop in the water and not
Speaker 1: and forget about it. Yeah, and the farts just go
Speaker 1: straight up right exactly exactly. Let the let the terrestrial
Speaker 1: creatures deal with our fart. Do you fit sleep fish fart?
Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't really think they do all
Speaker 1: that much. I know manities fart like a lot which
Speaker 1: are which are mammals, and they eat a lot of
Speaker 1: a lot of vegetation, a lot of fiber and they
Speaker 1: actually use their farts to be able to manage their
Speaker 1: their floating. But it's a good question. I don't really
Speaker 1: think fish fish fart that much, if at all, they're
Speaker 1: missing out. So generally speaking, when fish have a a
Speaker 1: nose like structure, like you see a fish and it's
Speaker 1: got like a protuberance that looks like a nose, chances
Speaker 1: are it has nothing to do with it being an
Speaker 1: actual nose. It's probably just a rostrum or a fleshy
Speaker 1: extension that has nothing to do with their actual nostrils,
Speaker 1: or or like sort of old factory system, which is
Speaker 1: exactly the case with the uniform cornfish. Despite having this
Speaker 1: very mr burns like nose, it's not a nose. It's
Speaker 1: just it's just a horn. And here's the thing. I
Speaker 1: don't think researchers necessarily does what what it's for. I
Speaker 1: have a guess, Yeah, what do you think to creep
Speaker 1: out predators Like predators are just like, oh no, I'm
Speaker 1: not eating that. I don't know, I'm not exactly sure
Speaker 1: what that is. They look at them head on and
Speaker 1: it's like I'm gonna eat this fish, and then the
Speaker 1: fish turns and profile like oh oh, I don't like that.
Speaker 1: You know, are there is there a species that survives
Speaker 1: based on creeping out other species? I mean besides humans.
Speaker 1: I mean, they're sure there's a lot of defensive behaviors
Speaker 1: that are meant to spook off predators. But in terms
Speaker 1: of like like there are butterflies or caterpillars that have
Speaker 1: these big I spots meant to scare predators. In terms
Speaker 1: of just like creeping them out, they are like some
Speaker 1: caterpillars and spiders that look like poop. So you know,
Speaker 1: I guess that's at putting right exactly. Yeah, that's that
Speaker 1: seems to make the most sense in the animal kingdom.
Speaker 1: I just like the idea of a certain one that
Speaker 1: the predators just like mm hmm. Yeah, you're just unsettling. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't know, I don't know what's going on with you,
Speaker 1: like a deer that has human hands and and just
Speaker 1: the predators like, I mean, I don't wanna, right, it's
Speaker 1: not like an actual threat to me, but no things. Yeah,
Speaker 1: if you're really hungry, you'll eat everything, but the hands
Speaker 1: probably also just like unicorns, these unicorn fish are apparently
Speaker 1: very tasty. Yeah. Nice, You just have to get past
Speaker 1: the idea of eating a fish with a human nose again,
Speaker 1: it's it's I think that's how it would work, right,
Speaker 1: Like if someone slapped this on your plate, like served
Speaker 1: it to you, you'd be like, no, thanks, Like I
Speaker 1: don't see this a lot at restaurants, I assume. I mean, yeah,
Speaker 1: I've I've never eaten a unicorn fish. I think i'd
Speaker 1: remember we don't live near where they are. Yeah, but
Speaker 1: i'd have to assume you have to like start children
Speaker 1: on unicorn fish, young gir els. They're not gonna yeah,
Speaker 1: because it's like eating a Simpsons character, Like they look
Speaker 1: like a Simpsons character that the profile is. I mean,
Speaker 1: it's so Simpson's esk. It's weird. It's like it's like
Speaker 1: a cartoon face. If if people haven't looked it up,
Speaker 1: definitely look it up. It's like I don't know like
Speaker 1: if I was. This is why I don't go in
Speaker 1: the ocean. First of all, I don't go in the um.
Speaker 1: And it's not because the sharks. Is because of things
Speaker 1: like this or like crabs. When it's like, oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: the ocean has like ocean spiders and nose fish, it's like, no,
Speaker 1: I don't need to be in there. I don't need
Speaker 1: to be amongst that. Most of the crabs are in
Speaker 1: the sand. Yeah, that's even worse. I'd love to just
Speaker 1: like sort of why lay at the bottom of the ocean.
Speaker 1: Just let all of them crawl over me, you know,
Speaker 1: use my body as a playground. Where is pods? Deep
Speaker 1: sea is so pods and crabs and see spiders get
Speaker 1: all you know, it's gonna be fun. Tickles, It's lots
Speaker 1: of tickles on the bottom of the ocean. Well, I
Speaker 1: can't go to the next section without mentioning the sawfish.
Speaker 1: So the sawfish are found all over the world in
Speaker 1: tropical and subtropical waters. They are a species of ray,
Speaker 1: so rays are related to sharks and manta raise and
Speaker 1: the sawfish have a long, flat rostrum. So again, the
Speaker 1: rostrum is that pointy uh, sort of like fleshy protuberance
Speaker 1: from their head, which is not a nose but looks
Speaker 1: quite a bit like a nose. Uh. And for the sawfish,
Speaker 1: their rostrum is flat with chainsaw like teeth all the
Speaker 1: way around it, just like a chainsaw. Hot. Yeah, what
Speaker 1: what's happened? What's what? What's their problem? Like? What is
Speaker 1: this coming in? Hot? With the judgments are sorry, like what,
Speaker 1: what's their deal? Why isn't there more animals like this?
Speaker 1: Just them? It sounds like you're saying, what's all of
Speaker 1: our problem for not having a face? Chainsaw? Actually honest
Speaker 1: kind of yeah, yeah, well you know, I guess uh
Speaker 1: like different strokes for different folks is when it comes
Speaker 1: to evolution. Um, So it really does look like you
Speaker 1: stuck as sideways chainsaw onto sort of a flattened shark.
Speaker 1: And there is a purpose of for this thing. Um.
Speaker 1: First of all, so those teeth all the way around
Speaker 1: the rostrum, you might wonder like, well, how did teeth
Speaker 1: get over there? And that is a correct concern because
Speaker 1: they aren't really teeth. They're not teeth like you would
Speaker 1: find in your mouth. They are actually hardened dermal denticles.
Speaker 1: So I dentical is a toothlike projection. So it can
Speaker 1: be like a fleshy projection often found in marine animals.
Speaker 1: But it can be fleshy, it can also be very hard,
Speaker 1: which is the case for sawfish. Sharks also have a
Speaker 1: lot of denticles on their skin, usually microscopic denticles. It's
Speaker 1: what gives their skin this sort of harsh sand papery
Speaker 1: feel um. But for the sawfish, they are these rather
Speaker 1: large denticles that are hard and they look like teeth,
Speaker 1: but they're technically not like mouth mouth teeth. They're not
Speaker 1: mouth bones. So they can actually grow to be quite large,
Speaker 1: up to about seven and a half meters, which is
Speaker 1: about twenty five ft, which let a lot of people
Speaker 1: back in the day, back in olden times, to think
Speaker 1: that the sawfish would use its face saw to chop
Speaker 1: people up and eat them. Mhm. I feel like it's
Speaker 1: reasonable to think that if you came across this you
Speaker 1: might never want to go into the ocean again. I
Speaker 1: don't know if that's the case for you, or if
Speaker 1: it's just New England not just oceans. Like, there's nothing
Speaker 1: in the ocean that makes me want to go in
Speaker 1: the ocean. We're just breezing. Pass the word denticles here,
Speaker 1: dental tentacles. Yeah, dental tent tentacles. That's wonderful. What word
Speaker 1: it is a good word, isn't it? I love it?
Speaker 1: Dur so dermal denticles because that just means skin, skin bumps,
Speaker 1: but you know, dermal denticles. Yeah, I mean, like I
Speaker 1: love the idea of like some olden times, like because
Speaker 1: you know, back in the day, people couldn't just go
Speaker 1: scuba diving all the time. So you had this like
Speaker 1: old fashioned scuba suit, you know, with a big, big
Speaker 1: diving helmet. And this guy comes back up after his
Speaker 1: adventure and they're like, well, what's it like down in
Speaker 1: the ocean. He's like, yeah, ocean swall of chainsaws. It
Speaker 1: was like, yep, yep, sharks, sharks have chainsaws. What's a chainsaw? Well,
Speaker 1: you don't even know. You just need to know. Sharks
Speaker 1: got him, and we can't go back in. Yeah, never
Speaker 1: going back in because when you see one of these,
Speaker 1: there's always I'm sure this how sea monsters happen. It's
Speaker 1: like you see something like this and you're not even
Speaker 1: sure if it's the adult or baby. Where it's like
Speaker 1: do these get any bigger? Hey, how would you know? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Giants squids are some of the few um cryptids to
Speaker 1: be proven real because you describe that people are like no,
Speaker 1: no dinner plates, right, and yeah, they can grow up
Speaker 1: to be a healthy size there, you know, they're healthy boys.
Speaker 1: They get pretty big. So the saw is not used
Speaker 1: to chop up people or even to chop up large
Speaker 1: marine animals. Humans are actually too big for sawfish to eat,
Speaker 1: but the saw is used for hunting, so they can
Speaker 1: use this saw to locate prey because like we're talking
Speaker 1: about earlier, Hannah, Uh, they have electro receptors in it.
Speaker 1: So there are these tiny bulbs used by sharks and
Speaker 1: by these sawfish in there basically in their snout area.
Speaker 1: For for the sawfish, it's in this the chainsaw nos area.
Speaker 1: But these tiny bulbs used for electro reception are called
Speaker 1: the ampule of Lorenzini, which I want. So I don't
Speaker 1: know what champion is, probably Lauren. I think lauren Zini
Speaker 1: probably named them, like, these are the ampule of me, Laurens.
Speaker 1: That's what I want named after me? Actually kind of
Speaker 1: that's something, right, yeah, actually leave your mark on the world. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but yeah, So they these these little receptors can detect
Speaker 1: electrical signals fish make as their muscles move. So every
Speaker 1: time your muscles moving, even every time you think there
Speaker 1: are there is a very faint electrical signal that is
Speaker 1: released um and that can be detected by sharks in general,
Speaker 1: and by this sawfish through its cool chainsaw noves. It
Speaker 1: is probably the coolest fish, right, sure? He has lots
Speaker 1: of cool fish. I mean, what counts as a fish,
Speaker 1: because as far as I could tell, scientifically, the word
Speaker 1: fish has no right. There was a whole thing about that,
Speaker 1: like cuttlefish are fish. That fish is like a weird Yeah,
Speaker 1: cuttlefish are mollusks. Yeah, fish is. It's similar to when
Speaker 1: we talk about reptiles. It's kind of a weird classification. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean, but we call jellyfish fish. We just we
Speaker 1: just throw that so casually, Yeah, I would say if
Speaker 1: the name is fish, like, if it has fish in
Speaker 1: the name, that's maybe a lie. My rule is always
Speaker 1: that if it's got like a vertical tail and gills,
Speaker 1: then it's probably some sort of fish, like if I
Speaker 1: saw it in the ocean, which I would never go into.
Speaker 1: But if it's got like a horizontal, floppy tail and
Speaker 1: like some sort of hole for air, then I'm sometimes
Speaker 1: but sometimes it's a but sometimes it's an amphibian. Sure, gotcha,
Speaker 1: boom roasted nice broad strokes, oh boy. Yeah. Like basically, yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean like fish, And yeah, we do call a
Speaker 1: lot of things like jellyfish fish. Jellyfish are not fish.
Speaker 1: But yeah, in general, I think Dave, that is a
Speaker 1: good call like, if it's got gills, if it's got
Speaker 1: either cartilage or bones, uh, you know at least a notochord,
Speaker 1: If not a spine, then it's a fish. If it's
Speaker 1: made out of google like a jellyfish, it's not a fish.
Speaker 1: If it's just all goo, or if it's all squish
Speaker 1: like a like a cuttlefish, it's not a fish. That
Speaker 1: that is actually you know they're related to squid and
Speaker 1: and octopuses. Um. But these sawfish are indeed fish, just
Speaker 1: like just like sharks are sharks is fish um. Whereas
Speaker 1: as we know, whales are not fish because they are
Speaker 1: confused mammals who went back inside the ocean. Perfect yeah
Speaker 1: their failure mammals right like their mammals, Yeah exactly, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: Like I just worship dolphins so much. Yeah, they just
Speaker 1: decided to hold their bravery time. Ye. Why do we
Speaker 1: think they're so smart? It's just insulation, it's brain insulation.
Speaker 1: They get cold. Speaking of weird noses, they move their
Speaker 1: nose to like the top of their heads. Weirdos, right, weirdos. Yeah.
Speaker 1: So the sawfish right, who who's not a nose but
Speaker 1: rostrum nose like saw deely? Yeah, can detect fish with
Speaker 1: the electro reception. It also has a more sinister use,
Speaker 1: which is smacking prey, so it does kind of use
Speaker 1: it like a sauce, So it's not they don't really
Speaker 1: slice and dice up prey like a saw wood. It
Speaker 1: doesn't rotate and like make little little noises like an
Speaker 1: actual saw. Um m m. Sorry, yeah, it's more like
Speaker 1: well like you get like all around your your rostering. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it doesn't quite. That would be fun like a little
Speaker 1: like serving little or derves at like a fish party,
Speaker 1: and it's got all or derves all all around. I
Speaker 1: like that, but not probably not really not in reality,
Speaker 1: you liar. But yeah, I mean it's more just like
Speaker 1: it smacks them hard and it stuns them. Probably just
Speaker 1: startles them more than anything, because this thing comes out
Speaker 1: of nowhere with a software face. And then once they've
Speaker 1: smacked them and incapacitated, and then they get to chomp
Speaker 1: them up with their actual mouth, uh and and they
Speaker 1: can use it for defense against predators or people who
Speaker 1: are silly enough to like pick up a sawfish and
Speaker 1: be like, hey, look Martha found sawfish, and then it's
Speaker 1: gonna cut you because you know, yeah, while they don't
Speaker 1: prey on people. They don't hunt people. They will like
Speaker 1: smack you if you It's get everything about this species
Speaker 1: is telling us not to do that. Feel like if
Speaker 1: you do that, it seems just generally good for them
Speaker 1: to have a saw on their face, Like it's not
Speaker 1: one use it's just look, we got a saw on
Speaker 1: our face. We're gonna use it the way we're going
Speaker 1: to use it. Right. Well, are they evolving you think
Speaker 1: so that they can be a chainsaw when organic chainsaw?
Speaker 1: You think that's the goal. Maybe speak for them. I
Speaker 1: can't speak for them, but I'm sure they are like
Speaker 1: some sawfish like going around like slapping their slapping their
Speaker 1: rosterrom going like we get some batteries in this baby,
Speaker 1: get some you get a motor going, and now we're
Speaker 1: cooking with gas. Now we'll see who's the apex predator
Speaker 1: trying to unseek great white sharks. Yeah. All they need
Speaker 1: then is like a huge woman knows some human hands,
Speaker 1: a hockey, a hockey mask, a hockey man, sure, a
Speaker 1: little hockey mask. Someone someone make a cryptid some maniacs stuff.
Speaker 1: One of these fish. Would the would the Jason origin
Speaker 1: story of the sawfish be that someone like beached beach
Speaker 1: didn't turned into a ghost underwater, because isn't it Like
Speaker 1: with Jason movies, it's like he was drowned as a child.
Speaker 1: He drowned, but not really uh. And in the first
Speaker 1: movie it was his mom who killed all the people,
Speaker 1: and then in the second one he gets his mother's
Speaker 1: head and it turns out he hadn't drowned. And then
Speaker 1: I think in the sixth one, Tommy Jarvis um drowns
Speaker 1: him successfully in the lake and then he stuck down
Speaker 1: there until a tele kinetic powers of Tina Shepherd resurrects him.
Speaker 1: If you wanted to know this, why would because there's
Speaker 1: so many scary things. So yeah, in this version, the
Speaker 1: fish would be um on the land. The fish would
Speaker 1: be yeah, beached right. You know, there's something to be
Speaker 1: scared of. The only time I touched the jellyfish, it
Speaker 1: was a condom. It's I mean, that's something that scared of.
Speaker 1: I guess it's creepy in there. It's been a long time.
Speaker 1: It doesn't want it. You can't even drink the water
Speaker 1: like it's it's you don't It doesn't want us. It's
Speaker 1: literally trying to push us out of it all the time.
Speaker 1: That's just wave after wave of the ocean, like get out,
Speaker 1: get out? What's not what's not inviting about? Like saw
Speaker 1: face fish and likes fish? Yeah, really fostering a welcoming environment, yeah.
Speaker 1: Seeweed tangling your ankles. Yeah, just give me a little tickle,
Speaker 1: something brushes up against you, Just a little tickle. High there,
Speaker 1: it's a perfect I got a software nose. Hither Why
Speaker 1: are fish and reptiles satisfied with nostrils while mammals go
Speaker 1: all out for noses? It actually comes down mainly to thermoregulation.
Speaker 1: Reptiles and other cold blooded animals are ectotherms who rely
Speaker 1: on their environment to thermo regulate, like sitting in the
Speaker 1: sun or shade. Mammals and coincidentally birds as well, are
Speaker 1: warm blooded or endotherms and rely on internal body regulation
Speaker 1: to keep our temperature steady. Endotherms have more rapid metabolisms
Speaker 1: and must breathe the faster while making sure our internal
Speaker 1: body temperature is warm but not too warm and not
Speaker 1: too cold. So our noses actually perform a very important
Speaker 1: function and air conditioner heat or purified and humidifier all
Speaker 1: in one. Breathing quickly means that without a humidifier, we
Speaker 1: would lose a lot of our internal moisture. So our
Speaker 1: noses have structures called turbinates, bony protrusions. Bony protrusions covered
Speaker 1: in a mucus membrane. The cilia hairs and mucus membrane
Speaker 1: captures air as it passes and moistens it warms it
Speaker 1: or cools it and purifies it so once it reaches
Speaker 1: the sensitive tissues of our lungs, it's gone through a
Speaker 1: whole premium treatment to make it suitable for our bodies.
Speaker 1: When we return, we're going to discover even more uses
Speaker 1: for noses other than sniffing and conditioning air and folks,
Speaker 1: it's batty. The joke is, we're actually we're gonna we're
Speaker 1: gonna talk about bats. We're gonna talk about bats. We'll
Speaker 1: be our bat Belts are mostly known for their incredible
Speaker 1: ability to echolocate, sending out clicks and re seeving spatial
Speaker 1: information based on the echoes they get back, but not
Speaker 1: all bats rely all that much on echolocation, such as
Speaker 1: the mega bat. Fruit bats larger bats who like to
Speaker 1: munch on tasty fruit all day, and bats aren't really blind,
Speaker 1: they have functional eyes. It's just the bats who fly
Speaker 1: dark night skies or hunt at night rely on their
Speaker 1: echolocation much more than their eyesight. And while it may
Speaker 1: not seem obvious, bat noses are some of the most
Speaker 1: fascinating honkers in the animal kingdom. So we're gonna talk
Speaker 1: about bat noses what everyone's been waiting for. Yeah, So, like,
Speaker 1: I feel like this is bringing it back full circle
Speaker 1: to the rhino grades, the fake like weird true mice
Speaker 1: with the huge noses that they walk on or like
Speaker 1: fly with their ears and stuff. Because like bats are
Speaker 1: basically as incredible as like what this zoo all just
Speaker 1: came up with in terms of like the diversity of
Speaker 1: noses and uses for the noses. It's really incredible. Um. So,
Speaker 1: you know, bats are mostly known for their sonar, but
Speaker 1: they also use their noses in ways that are really important.
Speaker 1: So some bats actually even use their noses in echolocation.
Speaker 1: So they can echolocate with like their mouth or their
Speaker 1: tongue or their throat, but they can also echolocate using
Speaker 1: their nose basically as like a resonance chamber to send
Speaker 1: out clicks like a megaphone. But they also have incredible
Speaker 1: diversity in terms of like the shapes that noses come
Speaker 1: in and the functions that they do. So one really
Speaker 1: cool example is how vampire bats use their nose. So
Speaker 1: they use those large upturn sort of like like pointy
Speaker 1: shaped nose, uh to literally feel for heat coming off
Speaker 1: of the blood pumping through their hosts. Arteries. Oh, it's creeps.
Speaker 1: That's crazy. It looks like they're gently nuzzling their their
Speaker 1: host like they'll be on like cow leg and you'll
Speaker 1: see them kind of like sniffing around sort of nuzzling
Speaker 1: with their nose. But it's really they're hunting down to
Speaker 1: find where that tasty vein is so that they can
Speaker 1: think in and get get some nice blood. Can you
Speaker 1: switch tabs? I just want to see that nose one
Speaker 1: more time? Did we know that? Okay, that's vagina. Sorry,
Speaker 1: that's not that's not that's not the vampire. But let
Speaker 1: me get a vampire bat. Oh, I'm sorry. Okay, that's okay,
Speaker 1: it's it's coming that with a vagina face. I'm sorry.
Speaker 1: I actually find no, it's very funny. Uh No, I
Speaker 1: actually think vampire bats are super super cute. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: did you write they have such cute little faces. Yeah,
Speaker 1: they just want some blood. Give them my blood? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Do they When we called them vampire bats, was it
Speaker 1: just because they drink blood? Uh? Did we know at
Speaker 1: the time that they apparently can sniff out blood like
Speaker 1: a vampire would too, Like that's really vampiric of them
Speaker 1: to be like I can sense your blood with my nose. Weird, right,
Speaker 1: as if vampires are maybe actually real and the FBI
Speaker 1: is just trying to keep us from finding out the truth. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean they are real. There are people with an
Speaker 1: issue that makes them obsessed with drinking blood, and there
Speaker 1: are also people who react really badly to sunlight because
Speaker 1: they have a condition. All of these things affect humans.
Speaker 1: They're just very rare and often psychological, right. And then
Speaker 1: there are people who dress up like bats to fight crime, right,
Speaker 1: that's true life people who do that. Yes, But the
Speaker 1: vampire bet noses actually have these like little tiny pores
Speaker 1: in their nose that are these they're called pit organs,
Speaker 1: and they're these like little uh thermo sensory organs that
Speaker 1: can like actually detect heat coming out of it, and
Speaker 1: so they can detect It's sort of like you know
Speaker 1: how sometimes doctors have that vein finder. It's like this
Speaker 1: thing that can can show you where the vein is,
Speaker 1: so they can if someone's got hard to see veins
Speaker 1: in their arm, they can give you injections more easily.
Speaker 1: It's like that, except they use it to drink your bed.
Speaker 1: Little cuties, little stinkers. They're very cute. If I wasn't
Speaker 1: afraid of the specific picture that you posted, he looks like, uh,
Speaker 1: like someone just threw a surprise birthday party. Like he's
Speaker 1: a five year old boy and they've surprised him with
Speaker 1: a birthday party. Is it's a bunch of this yeah,
Speaker 1: right right, Like if rabies wasn't an issue, I would
Speaker 1: totally volunteer to get my blood sucked by one of
Speaker 1: these keys. Um. But yeah, if you throw a surprise
Speaker 1: party for like a vampire bat, it's it's just like
Speaker 1: a bunch of cow legs that are bleeding. It's like, oh,
Speaker 1: you shouldn't have so cute. Um, so cute. But vampire
Speaker 1: bats are not the only bats with a interesting specialized nose.
Speaker 1: I can't There are so many different bat noses. I
Speaker 1: if I talked about every bat nos this, it would
Speaker 1: be the whole podcast for the rest of all known
Speaker 1: time and space. And I can't do that. I simply can't,
Speaker 1: but I beg you please look up just like google
Speaker 1: bat noses and admire the bat noses. Is there one
Speaker 1: with human nose? There one with a human nose? Yeah? Um,
Speaker 1: depends on what your definition of human noses, like a
Speaker 1: fleshy human nose, like a no, well not quite no,
Speaker 1: I would say no. I would say, uh no, but
Speaker 1: they have like mc esure drawing noses, like a puzzle
Speaker 1: of a nose horseshoe. Bats use their noses for really
Speaker 1: interesting things, so they have, uh, these incredibly strange nose
Speaker 1: structures that it looks like a weird m c esure drawing.
Speaker 1: Maybe a little bit uh, Georgio o'keef hannas you were
Speaker 1: saying earlier, a little slightly slightly Georgio keep asked, I
Speaker 1: would say, you know, slightly, Uh, I could have been
Speaker 1: reading into it. Well, look, you know that it's got
Speaker 1: a lot of interesting folds and things in shape and stuff.
Speaker 1: So they are shaped so interestingly because these folds and
Speaker 1: flaps and in beautiful nose structures can help focus sound frequencies,
Speaker 1: so they can specifically focus their sonar better, which really
Speaker 1: it's like it seems to defy physics, these noses and
Speaker 1: I love them. And then there's also the sword nose bat,
Speaker 1: which is that a sword on your nose? Are you
Speaker 1: just happy to see me? I say to the bat
Speaker 1: trying to deduce a bat? Anyways, Yeah, they have they
Speaker 1: have a dang sword on their face. It's just a
Speaker 1: big long sword. It's a genus bats or a genus Yeah,
Speaker 1: I know, right, congratulations big nose energy. Uh you know
Speaker 1: how much fun we would have with swords on our
Speaker 1: faces or like horns. I guess if we had like
Speaker 1: a unicorn horn, it would yeah, we would. I we
Speaker 1: would either be having a blast or we wouldn't exist
Speaker 1: anymore because we would all died out stabbing each other
Speaker 1: with our horns. Right, but like we wouldn't invent I'd
Speaker 1: use it to change the channel. Oh yeah, I'd use
Speaker 1: it to change the channel and my television remote sensible
Speaker 1: chuckle weekly Um No, I mean we would definitely. We
Speaker 1: would definitely sword fight ourselves to death, wouldn't we If
Speaker 1: we had face swords, we'd we'd have like we'd have
Speaker 1: to cork them. People would be sharpening them, you know,
Speaker 1: like real edge lords would be like sharpening their their horns.
Speaker 1: I mean they would have to grow during puberty because
Speaker 1: you can't give birth to that and that is the
Speaker 1: worst time to start having a hord. Yeah. Now, luckily
Speaker 1: for these bats, uh, these nose, these sword noses are
Speaker 1: actually not sharp. They're not hard, They're flappy there. It's like,
Speaker 1: you know, like a kid ear kind of looks like
Speaker 1: it's a sharp point, but you poke it into flippity
Speaker 1: floppy like that. Yeah. So, uh, they are a genus
Speaker 1: about species that looks like they have a long blade
Speaker 1: coming out of the tops of their noses. It's longer
Speaker 1: than their entire head. So it's quite impressive. Uh. They
Speaker 1: are found in South and Central America, and they are
Speaker 1: insectivores like a lot of bats. Uh, and so insectivore
Speaker 1: of bat species, sonar is really important to them for hunting,
Speaker 1: to be able to find those little insects at night.
Speaker 1: And so these bats have a bat hunting technique known
Speaker 1: as aerial hawking. So aerial hawking just sort of like
Speaker 1: the bird the hawk is a technique where the bat
Speaker 1: catches insects midflight. And because they need to do this,
Speaker 1: having super precise, really strong echolocation skills is super important
Speaker 1: and there is a research on there these interesting noses,
Speaker 1: and they are finding that this is likely an adaptation
Speaker 1: and to be able to use more precise echolocations. So
Speaker 1: research seems to suggest that the rainforest canopy environment that
Speaker 1: they live in requires them to have adaptive sonar that
Speaker 1: allows them to precisely target prey at long distances, even
Speaker 1: though there's a lot of stuff, like a lot of
Speaker 1: sort of extra stuff and and noise going on inside
Speaker 1: of their forest environment. And then also that this sonar
Speaker 1: is so precise that they can actually detect the glinting
Speaker 1: echolocation off of an insect's beating wings. So like they
Speaker 1: hit like imagine just like you kind of glance off
Speaker 1: of a moths beating wing and you know where it is.
Speaker 1: It's amazing, that's pretty that's impressive. Batman, they're like that
Speaker 1: makes sense. Well, they're they're like man bat, you know,
Speaker 1: bat bat, they're they're bat bats. The bats, they're bats.
Speaker 1: They're just bats, all right. It doesn't have to be
Speaker 1: a man all the time. They seem to be having
Speaker 1: a great time, right, Like has there been like there's
Speaker 1: not like a kid's cartoon about the world of bats. No,
Speaker 1: but it feels like it would be a lot of fun. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like the Zack Snyder Owl movie. But the Guardians, the Guardiens,
Speaker 1: have you seen that, it's a real bummer. It turns
Speaker 1: out Owl's lives are a real bummer. But I feel
Speaker 1: like bats are having a great time. Just sore and
Speaker 1: you're sniffing sniffing out things with the weird sonar and there.
Speaker 1: I mean, your life would be honestly, Yeah, it's a
Speaker 1: bonus that technically hnah, it's not poop. They are pellets
Speaker 1: and they are distinct waste material. That's yeah. I think
Speaker 1: they're having a pretty good time because like they're they're
Speaker 1: like bat society is surprisingly chilled, Like they're pretty social
Speaker 1: and they're don't really fight that much. They are you know,
Speaker 1: maybe they'll have the occasional squabble, but they really don't
Speaker 1: attack each other munch. They they don't. Which is they do?
Speaker 1: They do communal upbringing of young and they help out
Speaker 1: new new mother bats and also guys, the the male
Speaker 1: bats will give the females oral sex just as much
Speaker 1: as the females give the males oral sex. Yeah, bat
Speaker 1: society is great. Bats are having a great time, a
Speaker 1: great time. And the last bat I want to talk
Speaker 1: about one of my favorite bats. I just love them
Speaker 1: so much. They're called the hammer head bats, and I
Speaker 1: have covered these on the show before on our Bats episode,
Speaker 1: but I think they deserve an encore, especially on this
Speaker 1: nose episode, because they have such impressive honkers. And I
Speaker 1: really do mean honkers, because they honk with them. So.
Speaker 1: They are large bats found in West and Central Africa,
Speaker 1: and they are the largest bat on continental Africa, with
Speaker 1: a wingspan of up to one meters or about three feet.
Speaker 1: They eat fruit and they don't use that much sonar,
Speaker 1: just like a lot of other fruit bats that don't
Speaker 1: really need it to hunt because fruit does not generally
Speaker 1: move around all that much. You can just swoop down
Speaker 1: there and get it. But still, the males have this
Speaker 1: impressively large and chalky nose. It looks like someone glued
Speaker 1: a boombox to their faces. I want you guys to
Speaker 1: go and appreciate the hammer head bat, Like, right now,
Speaker 1: I have a picture of it. You've got to look
Speaker 1: at it. The last one right that looks it looks
Speaker 1: like a Simpsons character. It looks like, yeah, it's adorable,
Speaker 1: it's so cute, right, Yeah, I want to boop the nose.
Speaker 1: The nose must be booped. It's an interesting thing, right,
Speaker 1: because they don't really need to use much echolocation. What's
Speaker 1: with a big fancy knows uh? And it is used
Speaker 1: to seduce the ladies, just like a boom box. They
Speaker 1: used this box like nose as a residence chamber to honk.
Speaker 1: Sexual honking the best part of right. They can do
Speaker 1: up to a hundred and twenty honks a minute. That
Speaker 1: is a lot of honks. That's two honks a second, right, math, Sure, look,
Speaker 1: I can't do math. I'll just trust whatever numbers you say.
Speaker 1: But I think so right, Yes, sixty seconds in a minute.
Speaker 1: A hundred twenty honks a minute would mean yeah, you're
Speaker 1: right too. Hanks a second? Whoa, That means I did math.
Speaker 1: Congratulation that means you did math. Oh my god, but
Speaker 1: you win the award for best at Math on this podcast.
Speaker 1: So when I say honk, you probably kind think of
Speaker 1: it as like a goose honk. But the bat honking
Speaker 1: sounds a lot more like an alien abduction than like
Speaker 1: a car honk or a goose honk. So take a
Speaker 1: listen to this, you guys. To be honest, I was,
Speaker 1: I was hoping for a goose honk sounds like you
Speaker 1: know sweaky hammers, those squeaky hammers that you like. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I was hoping for a real like or like a
Speaker 1: truck honk. Yeah, like like something just really disruptive. I
Speaker 1: mean that's cool too. That sounds they make, that's what
Speaker 1: humans used to seduce ladies, and it is really disruptive
Speaker 1: of our lives. I want like one of those personalized honks,
Speaker 1: like one of those horns that you get on a
Speaker 1: car that's like, yes, every time you honk, but no,
Speaker 1: it is the alien sounds. In fact, like people who
Speaker 1: have to live near these bats often find them to
Speaker 1: be quite a nuisance because of all these like alien
Speaker 1: honks that keep going on every night, all night, all
Speaker 1: the time, horny baths making lots of noise. I mean,
Speaker 1: I love them. I think they're cute, but I suppose
Speaker 1: I could imagine if you're trying to sleep every time
Speaker 1: every night and then you just hear a bunch of
Speaker 1: horny baths going like hey hey, hey, hey hey, it's annoying.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, do they live? Where do they live? They
Speaker 1: live in western Central Africa? Oh okay, so not the
Speaker 1: same place as how their monkeys. Thank god that there
Speaker 1: are parts of the world's where the screams of horny
Speaker 1: animals are the vein of humans trying to sleep. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean, like if you live near coyotes and foxes,
Speaker 1: that's certainly true. We do, but we don't hear them
Speaker 1: that much. They're they're good about it. They're polite, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I think. Uh, I think that's a that's something that
Speaker 1: an animal has to learn, right, is to have I
Speaker 1: feel like, if they're too loud, then we'll just show
Speaker 1: up and start killing. Yeah, I'm sorry, you want to
Speaker 1: mate too loud. So they have to be polite if
Speaker 1: they're near unless they can fly like these bets. Like,
Speaker 1: if if they have too much of a nuisance to kill,
Speaker 1: then they're just going to annoy it. This is why
Speaker 1: parrots exist because they can fly away at any point. Yeah,
Speaker 1: they can. It's like that's why they're the only talking animal.
Speaker 1: They get to insult us and then fly away. Exactly.
Speaker 1: We're like, I always thought it was the correct vessel
Speaker 1: for Jello Biafra's voice to come out of was a parent.
Speaker 1: He sounds like a human parrot. He does, he really does.
Speaker 1: That's the that's the correct version of his voice. Who
Speaker 1: is wait, sorry, repeated lead singer of Dead Kennedy. Are
Speaker 1: you a Dead Kennedy's fan, Katie, I'm sorry. I don't
Speaker 1: listen to music. I just listen. I don't no music.
Speaker 1: I only listened to like horny animal sounds. That's my music.
Speaker 1: The leader of the Dead Kenny's kind of sounds like
Speaker 1: a horny animal. Sound like his voice seems like it
Speaker 1: would come out of some kind of animal. Definitely, Like
Speaker 1: if you can't imagine how a parrot would sing about
Speaker 1: I might like the Dead Kennedy's then if it sounds
Speaker 1: like a horny animal, I'll like it. Oh yeah, you'll
Speaker 1: love it. Yeah. Well, you guys, I think we've gone
Speaker 1: through every nose in the world. We did. We did
Speaker 1: every nose, every single one, a complete collection of noses.
Speaker 1: Thank you guys so much for joining me on on
Speaker 1: this this nasal adventure. So hey, you got anything to plug?
Speaker 1: Doesn't have to be about noses, could be anything anything
Speaker 1: you want to plug. Yeah, where we are going to
Speaker 1: because we're getting our stuff together, have a podcast about
Speaker 1: crypti It's called Cryptibits and it will be awesome. We
Speaker 1: don't know when it's coming out. We're really organized over here.
Speaker 1: And and I definitely did not settle Dave with yet
Speaker 1: another podcast which he already had too many. Um, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's coming out. I I'm assuming by munch March. Um
Speaker 1: it'll be on Gamefully Unemployees Network. That's me and Tom
Speaker 1: Ryman's podcast and streaming network. If people are interested, they
Speaker 1: can go to gamefully Uh no, sorry, they can go
Speaker 1: to patreon dot com slash Gamefully Unemployed and see all
Speaker 1: our stuff there. We have exclusive podcasts. We watch movies
Speaker 1: with people every Friday night. So yeah, it's fun. Check
Speaker 1: it out. Thank you guys so much for listening. If
Speaker 1: you enjoyed the show, please leave rating or review. I
Speaker 1: read all of them. They all warm my cold little
Speaker 1: fish heart. And if you are interested in asking a
Speaker 1: question or just getting in touch with me sending me
Speaker 1: pictures of your pets, please send your emails to create
Speaker 1: your future product gmail dot com. You can also find
Speaker 1: me online at Creature feature Pot on Instagram, at Creature
Speaker 1: feet Pot on Twitter. That's f t e et then
Speaker 1: is something very different? Uh, and thank you so much
Speaker 1: for listening. Thanks to the Space Classics for their super
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Speaker 1: you next Wednesday,