WEBVTT - Chip Ingram - Oct 23 - 9:30 am 0:00:11.740 --> 0:00:14.330 Today on Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. 0:00:14.530 --> 0:00:17.450 Have you ever tried to fix something, but the tool 0:00:17.510 --> 0:00:22.470 that you needed wasn't in the toolbox? It just doesn't work, right? Well, 0:00:22.510 --> 0:00:24.540 the same thing is true when it comes to building 0:00:24.579 --> 0:00:29.159 great relationships. There is a specific key required. And if 0:00:29.200 --> 0:00:31.800 you have it, you're in business. If you don't, it's 0:00:31.900 --> 0:00:34.460 probably not going to work very well. If you want 0:00:34.479 --> 0:00:38.070 to learn what it takes to build great relationships, stay 0:00:38.110 --> 0:00:38.310 with me. 0:00:40.659 --> 0:00:43.779 I'm Dave Drury, and this is Living on the Edge. Today, 0:00:43.820 --> 0:00:47.320 Chip Ingram continues his series, Caring Enough to Connect, Building 0:00:47.380 --> 0:00:50.220 Bridges to Those We Love. With a principle he says 0:00:50.300 --> 0:00:53.960 completely changed his own marriage from the inside out. You 0:00:54.020 --> 0:00:58.020 simply can't give away what you don't already have. If 0:00:58.060 --> 0:01:00.500 you don't know deep down in your own heart that 0:01:00.520 --> 0:01:03.800 you are already loved by God, Chip says you'll spend 0:01:03.820 --> 0:01:07.420 your whole life trying to manufacture love and acceptance from 0:01:07.600 --> 0:01:11.090 everyone around you instead. Well, now let's get started with 0:01:11.190 --> 0:01:15.030 today's message titled, You Can't Give Away What You Don't Possess. 0:01:16.450 --> 0:01:20.650 I'm talking about basically life lessons in terms of building 0:01:20.690 --> 0:01:24.130 a great family and just great friendships. Principles that have 0:01:24.150 --> 0:01:28.449 to do with marriage, parenting, friendships, your boss. And so 0:01:28.690 --> 0:01:31.360 let me do a quick review. Principle number one, the 0:01:31.380 --> 0:01:33.690 biggest lesson I learned was it all begins with God. 0:01:34.720 --> 0:01:39.920 God created relationships and his word gives direction to on 0:01:40.000 --> 0:01:43.580 how to have great ones by his intent. The second 0:01:43.620 --> 0:01:47.780 principle was that everyone is desperately insecure. We looked at 0:01:47.880 --> 0:01:50.840 the very beginning of time and Adam and Eve and 0:01:50.890 --> 0:01:55.230 that once sin entered the world, we're all varying degrees, 0:01:55.250 --> 0:01:58.490 we're just desperately insecure people. And so we said the 0:01:58.530 --> 0:02:02.450 passage was Genesis chapter three and then our practice was 0:02:02.510 --> 0:02:07.410 take off your mask. Authenticity builds genuine relational intimacy and 0:02:07.450 --> 0:02:12.930 hypocrisy destroys it. Principle number three is everyone behaves in 0:02:12.970 --> 0:02:16.450 a way that makes sense to them. When people act 0:02:16.550 --> 0:02:21.889 in immature, inappropriate, or even have patterns that appear absolutely 0:02:21.970 --> 0:02:26.310 dysfunctional and damaging, they're doing it for reasons that at 0:02:26.350 --> 0:02:29.650 least inside their head and from their experience, it makes sense. 0:02:30.490 --> 0:02:34.190 Principle number four, you cannot impart what you do not possess. 0:02:35.650 --> 0:02:38.870 In other words, if you do not like you, you 0:02:38.930 --> 0:02:43.790 will never love others. And I don't mean that like 0:02:43.850 --> 0:02:48.600 pop psychology. I mean like Jesus. You know, we say, 0:02:49.200 --> 0:02:53.640 what's the great commandment? Matthew 22, 38 and 39, you 0:02:53.680 --> 0:02:55.300 shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, 0:02:55.320 --> 0:02:58.100 with all your soul, with all your mind, and love 0:02:58.120 --> 0:03:03.710 your neighbor, how? As yourself. Now, if we're desperately insecure 0:03:04.090 --> 0:03:09.380 and I don't like me, It's really hard if I 0:03:09.419 --> 0:03:13.380 don't feel whole, if I don't feel loved, it's really 0:03:13.460 --> 0:03:18.560 hard to give away something I don't have. And so 0:03:19.340 --> 0:03:23.150 most of us, some point in time, figure out how 0:03:23.230 --> 0:03:27.109 to get affirmation. And then by God's grace, many of 0:03:27.169 --> 0:03:31.869 us come to know Jesus. And we know intellectually what's happened. 0:03:32.010 --> 0:03:33.670 We were pulled out of the kingdom of darkness and 0:03:33.690 --> 0:03:36.930 the kingdom of God. All of our sins have been forgiven. 0:03:37.320 --> 0:03:39.480 We have a new father. We have a new family. 0:03:39.560 --> 0:03:41.500 We have a new peace. We have a new future. 0:03:41.740 --> 0:03:42.460 We have a certain. 0:03:42.940 --> 0:03:46.260 Our significance has been established. We're the object of God's love. 0:03:46.920 --> 0:03:49.830 The prayer of the upright is his delight. We're loved 0:03:49.930 --> 0:03:52.050 like we will never ever be loved, totally apart from 0:03:52.090 --> 0:03:54.730 our performance. And we're a brand new creature in Christ 0:03:54.750 --> 0:03:57.710 that we live out in this fallen world. But see, 0:03:57.710 --> 0:04:00.510 2 Corinthians 5.17 says,' If any man or if any 0:04:00.550 --> 0:04:04.480 woman is in Christ,' the old things pass away.' Tense 0:04:04.520 --> 0:04:10.710 of the verb.' They' re gone forever.' tense of the verb, 0:04:11.030 --> 0:04:13.910 it's a process. Yes, I was in darkness, now I'm 0:04:13.950 --> 0:04:15.890 in light. I was a child of the darkness, now 0:04:15.930 --> 0:04:18.930 I'm a son of the light. Yes, I'm forgiven, I'm significant, 0:04:19.050 --> 0:04:21.349 I'm loved, I have the Holy Spirit, I have gifts, 0:04:21.410 --> 0:04:24.609 I've been sealed, my future, I'm the object of God's affection, 0:04:24.810 --> 0:04:30.180 but it's a process, and so when I begin my marriage, 0:04:30.820 --> 0:04:34.740 some of these things that I've learned, they stick, don't they? 0:04:35.400 --> 0:04:38.469 It's called the flesh process. And so I thought to myself, 0:04:39.270 --> 0:04:44.110 not consciously, let's see. If I want to have a 0:04:44.130 --> 0:04:46.600 good marriage and I want the most important person to 0:04:46.660 --> 0:04:49.760 love me, accept me, and affirm me in ways that 0:04:49.839 --> 0:04:53.240 really matter to me, I'll figure out what she wants. 0:04:54.400 --> 0:04:56.419 And so, okay, a good husband is this, this, and this. 0:04:56.480 --> 0:04:58.339 I'll do that. Oh, I guess it's this too. And 0:04:58.360 --> 0:05:00.620 then I need to do this. And so I performed, performed, 0:05:00.640 --> 0:05:02.600 and worked, and worked, and worked, and worked. But an 0:05:02.640 --> 0:05:06.480 amazing thing happened. I was working in the relationship to 0:05:06.520 --> 0:05:08.560 get my wife to love me in ways that I 0:05:08.600 --> 0:05:11.350 thought were significant to me. And it was all built, 0:05:11.380 --> 0:05:11.880 came out of what? 0:05:12.000 --> 0:05:14.289 Came out of a hole. Came out of my need. 0:05:14.470 --> 0:05:17.450 It came out of manipulating and trying to do the 0:05:17.510 --> 0:05:20.270 right thing to push the right buttons to get someone 0:05:20.310 --> 0:05:24.310 to love me. I wasn't loving her unconditionally. I was 0:05:24.410 --> 0:05:25.390 loving her in. 0:05:25.350 --> 0:05:27.489 A way that I hoped I'd get love back. 0:05:29.770 --> 0:05:33.180 The passage is Ephesians 5, 1 and 2. It says, 0:05:33.200 --> 0:05:37.020 therefore be imitators of God as beloved children and walk 0:05:37.060 --> 0:05:39.860 in love just as Christ also loved you and gave 0:05:39.900 --> 0:05:42.480 himself up for us as an offering and a sacrifice 0:05:42.520 --> 0:05:44.960 to God as a fragrant aroma. If you open your 0:05:44.980 --> 0:05:46.960 Bibles to this one, you've got to do a little work, okay? 0:05:48.330 --> 0:05:51.410 There's two commands there. But you've got to open your 0:05:51.430 --> 0:05:55.650 Bibles because the therefore means something happened in verse 32 0:05:55.650 --> 0:06:00.510 and 31 of chapter 4. As you turn there, you'll 0:06:00.529 --> 0:06:04.339 notice that The point is you can't impart what you 0:06:04.360 --> 0:06:08.779 don't possess. In other words, if you are not sensing, knowing, 0:06:08.920 --> 0:06:13.900 accepting the love that you already have from God, you 0:06:13.980 --> 0:06:17.420 can't give away love to others. You will be forced 0:06:17.460 --> 0:06:23.359 into some dysfunctional means of trying to manipulate, pretend, image 0:06:23.400 --> 0:06:25.940 cast to get people to affirm and to love you. 0:06:27.750 --> 0:06:31.750 But notice it says, therefore, be patient. Command one, be 0:06:31.770 --> 0:06:34.270 an imitator of God, a mimic. Well, what are you 0:06:34.290 --> 0:06:36.680 supposed to mimic? Look in your Bibles. What's verse 32 say? 0:06:37.600 --> 0:06:40.390 Go ahead, look in your Bibles. Therefore, be kind to 0:06:40.450 --> 0:06:44.400 one another, right? Tenderhearted. Forgiving one another, just as God 0:06:44.560 --> 0:06:47.900 also in Christ has forgiven you. Well, what's verse 31? 0:06:47.900 --> 0:06:50.880 Skip up. Therefore, he says, you're this brand new person 0:06:50.900 --> 0:06:53.480 in relationships, do something. Let all malice and wrath and 0:06:53.640 --> 0:06:57.339 anger and slander and all these negative attitudes, what's it say? 0:06:57.560 --> 0:07:01.080 Put them away, but instead be kind to one another, tenderhearted, 0:07:01.230 --> 0:07:04.290 forgiving one another. And then the verse that we looked 0:07:04.350 --> 0:07:07.289 at is, therefore, be a mimic of God. You're to 0:07:07.490 --> 0:07:11.100 mimic God. Well, what's a mimic? A mimic. A mimic, 0:07:11.120 --> 0:07:13.220 if one person does this, they do that. They do that, 0:07:13.300 --> 0:07:16.640 they do this. So what are we to mimic? We're 0:07:16.680 --> 0:07:19.660 to mimic to be kind in relationships the way God 0:07:19.720 --> 0:07:22.440 is kind. We're to be tenderhearted with people the way 0:07:22.480 --> 0:07:25.650 God is tenderhearted. We're to forgive or release or let 0:07:25.730 --> 0:07:29.130 people go the way God has let us go and 0:07:29.190 --> 0:07:32.350 forgiven us based on Christ's work. And so you have 0:07:32.390 --> 0:07:35.710 a command that says, mimic God, and did you notice 0:07:35.730 --> 0:07:38.830 the second command? It says, walk in love. And then 0:07:38.850 --> 0:07:41.710 it describes what love looks like. This isn't an ooey-gooey feeling. 0:07:42.210 --> 0:07:44.960 How do you love? Just as Christ loved us, well, 0:07:44.980 --> 0:07:47.820 how did he love us? A ooey-gooey feeling in his heart? Well, 0:07:48.000 --> 0:07:50.020 I hope there was some of that. But the Bible 0:07:50.060 --> 0:07:53.360 says the way he loved us, he gave himself up 0:07:53.440 --> 0:07:57.690 for us, a sacrifice, and he made his life a 0:07:57.810 --> 0:08:03.930 sacrifice he gave. He radically gave himself whether we responded 0:08:04.330 --> 0:08:06.270 or not. Now, here's what I want you to do. 0:08:07.500 --> 0:08:11.770 Between mimicking God and walking in love, in parenthesis, and 0:08:11.790 --> 0:08:13.510 you could put a circle around it in your Bible, 0:08:14.050 --> 0:08:15.750 what's the little phrase between those? 0:08:17.220 --> 0:08:21.160 Mimic God, how? As a beloved child. 0:08:22.420 --> 0:08:26.360 Or literally, as a dearly loved One, do you understand 0:08:26.400 --> 0:08:29.280 what the passage is teaching? He's saying, I want you 0:08:29.320 --> 0:08:32.180 to love in this impossible way. Forgive like God forgives. 0:08:32.250 --> 0:08:35.110 Be kind like God forgives. Be compassionate like God. And 0:08:35.130 --> 0:08:38.110 I want you to live this amazing, supernatural, sacrificial life 0:08:38.150 --> 0:08:44.690 toward others. But where's the resource? As a dearly loved child, 0:08:45.330 --> 0:08:50.290 you can't give away what you don't possess. My experience 0:08:50.330 --> 0:08:53.610 is the average Christian may intellectually know they're loved, The 0:08:53.730 --> 0:09:00.809 average Christian doesn't feel loved. You are significant. You are valuable. 0:09:01.230 --> 0:09:03.910 You are loved by God today apart from anything you 0:09:03.970 --> 0:09:06.609 could ever do as much as you will ever be loved. 0:09:06.929 --> 0:09:09.550 There's nothing you can do to diminish his love. There's 0:09:09.600 --> 0:09:11.460 nothing you can do to get more of his love. 0:09:11.860 --> 0:09:14.840 He loves you. And the basis of the Christian life 0:09:14.900 --> 0:09:16.699 is not I'm gonna read my Bible, I'm gonna pray, 0:09:16.840 --> 0:09:18.020 I'm gonna go on a mission trip, I'll try and 0:09:18.040 --> 0:09:20.700 be a good Christian, I'll try and have really good morals. Now, God, 0:09:20.720 --> 0:09:22.700 will you accept me? Do you love me? No, no, no, no, no. 0:09:23.940 --> 0:09:27.679 Completely opposite. It's you've already been forgiven. I love you. 0:09:27.800 --> 0:09:30.340 I care for you. The object of my affection. You 0:09:30.520 --> 0:09:33.599 are my child now. Walk in a manner worthy of 0:09:33.679 --> 0:09:36.140 who you already are. And you don't read your Bible 0:09:36.160 --> 0:09:39.089 to get brownie points. It's because you like being together. 0:09:39.110 --> 0:09:41.880 I mean, I don't go have coffee with my wife 0:09:41.920 --> 0:09:44.130 and say, okay, excuse me, dear. Do we have the 0:09:44.150 --> 0:09:49.089 little box? Talked with wife today. Okay, the next little box. 0:09:50.050 --> 0:09:52.560 Help clean up around the house. Now do you love me? 0:09:54.040 --> 0:09:58.550 I do that. Are you ready for this? I like her. 0:10:00.309 --> 0:10:03.780 I just want to be with her. She loves and 0:10:03.820 --> 0:10:10.460 accepts me. The Christian life is knowing, believing, and feeling 0:10:11.140 --> 0:10:15.040 that you are so loved and accepted that now you 0:10:15.080 --> 0:10:20.520 can be a giver in relationships. And no relationship works 0:10:21.390 --> 0:10:24.260 if ultimately your desire is to get something from it. 0:10:25.350 --> 0:10:28.770 If you pretend to give affection or give it, but 0:10:28.809 --> 0:10:31.430 the string is, I will be affectionate if you do this. 0:10:32.010 --> 0:10:34.479 If you give gifts so that this will happen. If 0:10:34.520 --> 0:10:37.900 you play little games to manipulate one another, what happens 0:10:37.960 --> 0:10:39.980 is as soon as the other person isn't coming through, 0:10:40.700 --> 0:10:41.260 then what happens? 0:10:41.380 --> 0:10:43.679 You're hurt, you're rejected, you're angry. 0:10:44.410 --> 0:10:46.350 See, God's not asking you to be nice to your 0:10:46.390 --> 0:10:48.370 mate or nice to your kids or nice to your 0:10:48.390 --> 0:10:50.849 parents or be a good old Joe out there in 0:10:50.870 --> 0:10:55.319 the marketplace. He's asking you to mimic God. Treat them 0:10:55.360 --> 0:10:57.360 the way Jesus would treat them if he was walking 0:10:57.400 --> 0:10:59.939 around inside your body. And you do need to remember 0:10:59.980 --> 0:11:03.739 he is, right? He dwells in you. How in the 0:11:03.800 --> 0:11:06.339 world can you do that? You can only do it 0:11:06.420 --> 0:11:10.530 when you so accept, know, and believe that you are dearly, 0:11:10.850 --> 0:11:16.090 dearly loved by God. Otherwise, I jot in my notes, 0:11:16.510 --> 0:11:20.630 until I find my significant security and value from my 0:11:20.670 --> 0:11:25.200 relationship with Jesus, every relationship will be a dysfunctional attempt 0:11:25.640 --> 0:11:31.100 to get love and acceptance from others through my performance, manipulation, looks, barter, 0:11:31.460 --> 0:11:31.880 or deceit. 0:11:35.100 --> 0:11:37.580 You're listening to Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. 0:11:37.940 --> 0:11:40.760 Just a quick reminder before we get back to today's message. 0:11:41.160 --> 0:11:43.140 Did you know you can take Chip's teaching with you 0:11:43.300 --> 0:11:46.880 everywhere you go? The Chip Ingram app puts hundreds of messages, 0:11:47.120 --> 0:11:50.949 reading plans, and daily encouragement right in your pocket anytime 0:11:50.970 --> 0:11:53.670 you need it. It's free to download wherever you get 0:11:53.690 --> 0:11:57.390 your apps. And for even more resources, visit us online 0:11:57.470 --> 0:12:01.830 at livingontheedge.org. Now back to today's lesson. 0:12:02.640 --> 0:12:04.219 Can I tell you the greatest thing that will ever 0:12:04.280 --> 0:12:07.820 happen in any of your relationships is for you to 0:12:07.940 --> 0:12:11.280 really believe not just with the head but from the 0:12:11.340 --> 0:12:15.940 heart that you are so loved by God that you 0:12:16.000 --> 0:12:20.260 are now secure enough to risk loving and caring and 0:12:20.350 --> 0:12:24.010 giving even if it doesn't come back. And so here's 0:12:24.030 --> 0:12:27.710 the practice. Loving others demand I learn to know, accept, 0:12:27.790 --> 0:12:31.950 and feel God's unconditional love for me. You need to 0:12:32.050 --> 0:12:37.620 know Accept and feel God's unconditional love for me. And 0:12:37.660 --> 0:12:39.240 if you feel like you're a little behind on this, 0:12:39.400 --> 0:12:41.980 I was probably a Christian at least 10 years and 0:12:42.020 --> 0:12:45.890 a pastor before I realized how much of my energy 0:12:45.929 --> 0:12:49.090 and my service to God was really about trying to 0:12:49.190 --> 0:12:53.010 gain his approval and people's approval rather than living out 0:12:53.050 --> 0:12:56.610 of being already loved. Let me give you some specific 0:12:56.670 --> 0:12:59.010 ways to go to work on this. The first one 0:12:59.170 --> 0:13:02.220 is how do you know Knowledge is an intellectual issue. 0:13:02.260 --> 0:13:06.520 Jot down, if you would, Romans 5.8. Romans 5.8 says, 0:13:06.940 --> 0:13:11.160 while you were yet a sinner, Christ demonstrated his love 0:13:11.210 --> 0:13:14.670 for you and that he died for you. So, I mean, 0:13:15.210 --> 0:13:17.630 before you even join the family and those people who 0:13:17.670 --> 0:13:20.290 choose not to join the family, those people who God 0:13:20.330 --> 0:13:23.900 loves them, they won't receive the benefits of that love 0:13:23.940 --> 0:13:27.720 because of their pride and their unwillingness to surrender to 0:13:27.800 --> 0:13:31.260 his love. But isn't it good to remember to know 0:13:31.740 --> 0:13:35.300 God loves you apart from your performance? Now, it doesn't 0:13:35.320 --> 0:13:39.099 mean your performance isn't important because that's the way I 0:13:39.160 --> 0:13:42.180 express my love to Him, but you can't earn it. Well, 0:13:42.210 --> 0:13:45.170 then how do you accept God's love? How do you 0:13:45.230 --> 0:13:49.050 get where, just being the regular old normal people that 0:13:49.070 --> 0:13:51.990 we all are, how do you get where you begin 0:13:52.070 --> 0:13:55.630 to know and accept God? That you really are loved 0:13:56.030 --> 0:13:58.460 so you don't have to manipulate and perform and do 0:13:58.500 --> 0:14:00.120 all this stuff that, by the way, we will all 0:14:00.160 --> 0:14:05.140 do to some degree until we die, right? Well, first 0:14:05.160 --> 0:14:07.199 of all, I think jot down, if you would, in 0:14:07.220 --> 0:14:10.860 your notes, Psalm 139. Here's what God thinks of you. 0:14:11.880 --> 0:14:19.030 You are fearfully and wonderfully made. God doesn't compare you 0:14:19.110 --> 0:14:21.030 to the person on the front of Cosmo or people. 0:14:21.570 --> 0:14:23.729 God doesn't compare you to someone on the front of 0:14:23.770 --> 0:14:30.750 Fortune 500. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. The all-knowing, all-powerful, 0:14:31.090 --> 0:14:33.690 all-wise God of all the universe, and we're just this 0:14:33.830 --> 0:14:38.620 one little tiny part of it, created you, and he 0:14:38.790 --> 0:14:41.560 loves just what he made. Like we say, oh, that's 0:14:41.600 --> 0:14:43.580 a Rembrandt. What a great work of art God says. 0:14:43.900 --> 0:14:46.040 He made you, and then he steps back and goes, 0:14:46.320 --> 0:14:48.800 you want to see greatness? 0:14:49.000 --> 0:14:49.400 There it is. 0:14:50.100 --> 0:14:52.570 Try looking in the mirror this week. I'm fearfully and 0:14:52.610 --> 0:14:56.410 wonderfully made. I look exactly how God wanted me to look. 0:14:57.220 --> 0:15:00.020 God's standard of beauty and value and significance is the 0:15:00.140 --> 0:15:03.800 only one that matters. Tell you what, you begin to 0:15:04.680 --> 0:15:07.500 renew your mind. I started writing these things on cards 0:15:07.560 --> 0:15:10.180 and that verse Psalm 139, I begin to pray them 0:15:10.200 --> 0:15:15.520 back to God. Until you like you, you can't love 0:15:15.540 --> 0:15:17.420 other people. And by like, I don't mean that you're 0:15:17.440 --> 0:15:20.640 content with behavior or issues that you know are ungodly. 0:15:21.040 --> 0:15:23.840 I mean where you say, you know something? I have 0:15:23.900 --> 0:15:27.100 these strengths and I have these weaknesses and this is 0:15:27.140 --> 0:15:30.040 the package that God made. And the strengths are to 0:15:30.090 --> 0:15:32.930 build confidence and a part of God's glory and the 0:15:32.970 --> 0:15:35.590 weaknesses are so that I'm always dependent on other people 0:15:35.990 --> 0:15:38.370 and realize that I can't make this little world by myself. 0:15:38.530 --> 0:15:41.890 I can never make it without others. The second way 0:15:41.930 --> 0:15:43.650 I think you get a grasp of how loved you 0:15:43.770 --> 0:15:46.450 are is by the price or your. 0:15:46.350 --> 0:15:47.110 Value to God. 0:15:48.150 --> 0:15:50.370 I mean if we lined up, can you imagine What 0:15:50.400 --> 0:15:52.550 if we lined up everyone on this back wall, every 0:15:52.590 --> 0:15:55.770 single person, and then we brought in a multi, multi-billionaire, 0:15:56.130 --> 0:15:59.109 and we said, you can only choose one person, and 0:15:59.150 --> 0:16:02.750 you have to pay $ 1 billion for this one person. 0:16:03.090 --> 0:16:05.770 And when you pay that, you can have them, and 0:16:05.790 --> 0:16:08.580 they're yours. And what if he looked and looked and 0:16:08.620 --> 0:16:11.020 looked and did research and did all kind of things 0:16:11.060 --> 0:16:13.100 and looked at everything that everyone in this whole room brought, 0:16:13.120 --> 0:16:15.880 and then he said, you, $ 1 billion for you. Or 0:16:15.900 --> 0:16:19.060 he said, you. Or he said, you. And then all 0:16:19.080 --> 0:16:21.100 of us are here, and he writes out a check 0:16:21.120 --> 0:16:24.220 for $ 1 billion, and you step out, would you not 0:16:24.260 --> 0:16:25.280 feel pretty good about yourself? 0:16:26.480 --> 0:16:26.660 Huh? 0:16:28.900 --> 0:16:34.000 Jot down, would you, 1 Corinthians 6, 19 and 20. 0:16:34.000 --> 0:16:37.360 God didn't pay a billion dollars for you. Do you 0:16:37.420 --> 0:16:41.880 not know that you are not your own? That you 0:16:41.920 --> 0:16:49.610 have been purchased with a price. Jesus, all-knowing, all-powerful, looking 0:16:49.630 --> 0:16:53.970 down all the corridors of all time and eternity, said, 0:16:54.510 --> 0:16:57.460 when your name comes up on the computer screen of 0:16:57.480 --> 0:17:01.860 the eternal Godhead, I'll pay the blood of my son 0:17:02.280 --> 0:17:05.400 for the person sitting in your seat. That's how much 0:17:05.440 --> 0:17:09.820 you matter. See, part of us, we just need to 0:17:09.859 --> 0:17:14.160 begin to grasp how valuable we are because of who 0:17:14.200 --> 0:17:17.540 made us and how valuable we are because we've been 0:17:17.580 --> 0:17:20.140 purchased And then I think we need to practically not 0:17:20.180 --> 0:17:24.600 just know, not just accept, but my journey has been 0:17:24.700 --> 0:17:27.220 how do you feel? How do you get that from 0:17:27.300 --> 0:17:31.850 here to here? And as I read scripture, for the 0:17:31.890 --> 0:17:35.310 last 30 years, I took this little book on the 0:17:35.350 --> 0:17:38.430 character of God, and there's lots of chapters. It's a 0:17:38.470 --> 0:17:41.190 book on God's character, the knowledge of the holy bitoser. 0:17:41.950 --> 0:17:44.649 But I've read the goodness of God probably 10 times 0:17:44.710 --> 0:17:47.240 more and on the love of God 10 times more 0:17:47.310 --> 0:17:50.189 than any chapter in this book for 30 years. In 0:17:50.250 --> 0:17:51.969 some stages for a decade at a time, I read 0:17:51.990 --> 0:17:54.810 at least a chapter a week or more. And then 0:17:54.850 --> 0:17:57.330 I would write on a card a little quote and 0:17:57.369 --> 0:18:00.510 a passage, and the only way I could learn to 0:18:00.550 --> 0:18:03.030 get it from my head to my heart was to 0:18:03.090 --> 0:18:05.690 take that truth and pray it to God and ask 0:18:05.730 --> 0:18:08.580 Him to make real in my heart what is true 0:18:08.880 --> 0:18:11.140 and help me to feel it. And then I learned 0:18:11.180 --> 0:18:13.920 from Scripture from David that if I would sing that 0:18:14.330 --> 0:18:17.300 and share that with God and rejoice over it, I 0:18:17.340 --> 0:18:20.800 would begin to emotionally experience it. What if you said 0:18:20.840 --> 0:18:23.600 to yourself as your eyes open in the morning, you 0:18:23.619 --> 0:18:27.080 could hear the Lord saying, Zephaniah 3, 17, I am 0:18:27.119 --> 0:18:32.330 the Lord your God. I am with you. I will 0:18:32.490 --> 0:18:36.449 protect you and cover you with my love. I rejoice 0:18:36.710 --> 0:18:40.510 over you with singing. What if God wasn't down on you? 0:18:40.730 --> 0:18:42.880 What if he really likes you? What if he has 0:18:42.900 --> 0:18:45.389 a great plan for you And what if you are 0:18:45.490 --> 0:18:51.200 so significant and valuable already that what other people think matters, 0:18:52.340 --> 0:18:56.199 but it doesn't dictate who you are? You see, you 0:18:56.240 --> 0:19:00.440 can't impart what you don't possess. And as you listen 0:19:00.460 --> 0:19:03.270 to the Apostle Paul building the church, what did he pray? 0:19:03.369 --> 0:19:05.970 Chapter 1, I pray that the eyes of their heart 0:19:06.010 --> 0:19:09.690 might be enlightened, that they might grasp or understand the 0:19:09.810 --> 0:19:13.010 strength of your power, the power of Christ's resurrection dwelling 0:19:13.050 --> 0:19:15.060 in them And then in chapter 3, he says, I 0:19:15.140 --> 0:19:17.619 bow my knee with all the family of God that 0:19:17.680 --> 0:19:20.320 you might be strengthened in your inner man so you 0:19:20.340 --> 0:19:24.330 could comprehend beyond just intellectual aspects what is the height 0:19:24.390 --> 0:19:27.050 and depth and length and breadth and to know, and 0:19:27.070 --> 0:19:30.790 the word is by way of experience, God's love for you. 0:19:31.250 --> 0:19:36.030 Having been deeply rooted and grounded in faith. See, I'll 0:19:36.070 --> 0:19:39.949 tell you what. Relationships begin with really understanding, hey, it's 0:19:40.050 --> 0:19:44.419 all about God's way of doing it. Accepting yourself and 0:19:44.500 --> 0:19:47.090 one another, we're all a bunch of desperately insecure people. 0:19:47.690 --> 0:19:49.490 That people really do behave in ways. 0:19:49.350 --> 0:19:51.250 That make sense to them. them, but not usually to us. 0:19:52.130 --> 0:19:54.270 And that I just can't give away what I don't have. 0:19:55.070 --> 0:19:56.830 And maybe the greatest thing I could do for every 0:19:56.869 --> 0:20:01.909 relationship is to know, accept, and believe, and to feel 0:20:02.700 --> 0:20:05.520 that I am loved for who I am apart from 0:20:05.580 --> 0:20:09.200 any performance today by the eternal God of the universe. 0:20:10.160 --> 0:20:12.680 And then kind of take the pressure off of trying 0:20:12.700 --> 0:20:14.580 to impress you all as much I try to impress 0:20:14.619 --> 0:20:17.379 you and try and look or do different things that 0:20:17.420 --> 0:20:21.080 get your affirmation and just kind of say, you know, Lord, 0:20:22.080 --> 0:20:23.820 you know, if they like you today, they kind of 0:20:23.840 --> 0:20:24.459 hate you tomorrow. 0:20:24.480 --> 0:20:25.480 That was the way with you, right? 0:20:25.700 --> 0:20:28.440 You know, they're cheering one day, crucifying you three days later. 0:20:29.710 --> 0:20:31.510 There was something to the heart of Christ who said 0:20:31.530 --> 0:20:34.610 he didn't entrust himself to people. We're all a bunch 0:20:34.650 --> 0:20:39.130 of fallen human beings, but you're valuable. And he wants 0:20:39.150 --> 0:20:43.760 you to be a giver And He loves you just. 0:20:43.500 --> 0:20:44.020 The way you are. 0:20:47.040 --> 0:20:49.760 You're listening to Living on the Edge with a message titled, 0:20:50.040 --> 0:20:53.169 You Can't Give Away What You Don't Possess. If you 0:20:53.210 --> 0:20:55.949 ever miss one of these daily messages, just catch up 0:20:56.050 --> 0:21:01.070 online at livingontheedge.org. We're in a series called Caring Enough 0:21:01.109 --> 0:21:04.359 to Connect, building bridges to those we love. And if 0:21:04.380 --> 0:21:07.460 you'd like to catch anything you missed, including Chip's special 0:21:07.560 --> 0:21:10.619 interview with Aaron Pierce, subscribe to the Living on the 0:21:10.760 --> 0:21:14.760 Edge podcast. Real love only flows out of people who 0:21:14.900 --> 0:21:18.560 already know deep down that they're loved by God. And 0:21:18.600 --> 0:21:21.360 that's just as true for the hardest relationship in your 0:21:21.400 --> 0:21:24.460 life as it is for the easiest one. If there's 0:21:24.500 --> 0:21:26.940 someone in your own life who feels far from God 0:21:27.000 --> 0:21:29.300 right now, don't let today be the end of it. 0:21:29.869 --> 0:21:33.090 Aaron Pierce's book, Not Beyond Reach, picks up right where 0:21:33.130 --> 0:21:36.910 his recent interview with Chip left off, walking you step-by-step 0:21:37.050 --> 0:21:41.290 from friendship to real spiritual conversation to the gospel itself, 0:21:41.869 --> 0:21:44.129 so you know exactly what to say and when to 0:21:44.170 --> 0:21:46.790 say it. So get your copy of the book, Not 0:21:46.850 --> 0:21:52.990 Beyond Reach, at a special price today at livingontheedge.org slash offers. 0:21:53.930 --> 0:21:57.260 You know, these powerful, honest teachings only reach people because 0:21:57.340 --> 0:22:01.260 listeners like you decide again and again that it's worth supporting. 0:22:01.980 --> 0:22:04.600 Give a gift right now and put your generosity behind 0:22:04.660 --> 0:22:08.139 a ministry that equips ordinary believers to have the conversations 0:22:08.200 --> 0:22:13.240 that actually matter. Just give online at livingontheedge.org or call 0:22:13.280 --> 0:22:14.840 our team at 888-333-6003. Or send your gift by mail 0:22:14.859 --> 0:22:25.840 to Living on the Edge, P.O. Box 3007. Sewanee, Georgia, 30024. Well, 0:22:26.960 --> 0:22:28.139 now here's Chip Ingram. 0:22:28.720 --> 0:22:31.300 As we close today's program, I would just bring your 0:22:31.380 --> 0:22:35.800 mind back to those prayers that I quoted by the 0:22:35.840 --> 0:22:39.760 Apostle Paul. Isn't it interesting? These people living in such 0:22:39.800 --> 0:22:43.250 a difficult time and in a difficult place, that what 0:22:43.270 --> 0:22:45.470 he prays for them is that they would be able 0:22:45.510 --> 0:22:49.030 to grasp, that they would understand, not just with their mind, 0:22:49.050 --> 0:22:51.810 but with their heart. In fact, he prays that beyond 0:22:51.830 --> 0:22:57.280 their their human comprehension, that we would understand and grasp 0:22:57.359 --> 0:23:01.629 and feel and experience the love of God. Could I 0:23:01.670 --> 0:23:04.330 just ask you to just lean back and think of 0:23:04.430 --> 0:23:08.530 how you would think differently and relate differently if you 0:23:08.590 --> 0:23:12.700 could hear in your heart God saying, hey, today, I'm 0:23:12.760 --> 0:23:16.200 with you no matter what. Hey, I'm not down on you. 0:23:16.780 --> 0:23:20.540 I love you. I'm for you. What if you believe 0:23:20.600 --> 0:23:23.460