Speaker 1: You're listening to Comedy Central. Wow. People come up to
Speaker 1: me all the time and say, Treble, how did you
Speaker 1: learn to crush it so hard? I always give them
Speaker 1: the same answer, Mr Ronnie Chang In Hashtag Crushing, a
Speaker 1: Success Podcast for Winners, Ronnie will give you the motivation,
Speaker 1: the life hacks, and the f D A pending dietary
Speaker 1: supplements that you need to live epically testing, testing diabetes
Speaker 1: in the mindset, and a hope test one too. What's up,
Speaker 1: chang Gang your boymn Chang here who with another episode
Speaker 1: of Hashtag Crushing, a Success Podcast for Winners. A lot
Speaker 1: of people ask me, Hey, Ronnie, how can that crush
Speaker 1: it as hard as you're crushing it. The answer is
Speaker 1: you can't. I'm crushing it harder than scientists thought possible.
Speaker 1: I've written thirteen books, delivered twenty eight TED talks, and
Speaker 1: I follow fifty eight thousand people on Twitter. I post
Speaker 1: over four hundred instroirational quotes that down Instagram, and I
Speaker 1: own over four thousand t shirts from Ed Hardy. I'm
Speaker 1: a NonStop dynamo of epic winning. Okay, I'm like Eaton
Speaker 1: Musk without the weird anime fetish. Fuck you Elon. But hey,
Speaker 1: if you listen to this peak cast and follow my advice,
Speaker 1: maybe you two can write this cross train to crush
Speaker 1: Town and the train conductor. It's Jeremy Piven. All right,
Speaker 1: I'm ready to pound. Let's start the show. Success money
Speaker 1: Instagram faking whoa, I'm still buzzing you guys. I just
Speaker 1: delivered the keynote of Power Thoughts Summit, presented by Forbes
Speaker 1: and Lin Cuisine. In fact, if you're interested, you can
Speaker 1: stream my speech right now. It's title why every Entrepreneurs
Speaker 1: to try huffing spray paint? Check that out on YouTube
Speaker 1: or catch me in my next live event. Pumping up
Speaker 1: the crowd at a winter assembly for Pembroke Middle School,
Speaker 1: Mrs Goldstein's class is gonna be seeing Christmas carols and
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be shooting red bulls out of a T
Speaker 1: shirt cannon. Hell yeah, you know what that means. It's
Speaker 1: time for the cleans report. Right now, I'm doing a
Speaker 1: Solids and Liquids cleans. I'm not eating or drinking any
Speaker 1: solids or liquids for two weeks. I mean, for breakfast,
Speaker 1: I had some vape smoke and for lunch, I think
Speaker 1: I'm gonna suck the helium of a balloon animal. I
Speaker 1: gotta tell you, thanks to this cleans hey, my energy
Speaker 1: is up, my blood pressure is down, and my motor
Speaker 1: skills are shot. If any of that sounds appealing to you,
Speaker 1: why don't you check out my website Ronnie Chang dot
Speaker 1: protein Powder. I've got exclusive recipes and an interview with
Speaker 1: Ashton Kutcher. Right, I'm backed. Let's take some calls if
Speaker 1: you've got a question about anything, entrepreneurship, muscle, mass manscaping
Speaker 1: bill right now. If a line is busy, dal Hotter,
Speaker 1: it's crushed. All right. We got a call on the
Speaker 1: line with James from Danbury, Connecticut. Hello James, longtime fan.
Speaker 1: Of course you are. I'm in Alpha's Alpha. I'm in
Speaker 1: Alfalfa um. So I'm about to be a college freshman
Speaker 1: and I want to become a doctor. I'm thinking neurosurgeon. Maybe.
Speaker 1: Do you have any advice for how I can make
Speaker 1: that happen? James, I do have some advice, and that
Speaker 1: advice is don't go to college, bro. Student debt is
Speaker 1: for suckers. You can learn everything you would in medical
Speaker 1: school by purchasing a corpse on the doc web you
Speaker 1: buy the corps, you cut it open, you poke around inside,
Speaker 1: and hey, you'll be ready to operate on Live Humans
Speaker 1: after four to five of corpses. No debt required. That said,
Speaker 1: you should pledge a frad Next call up, Hey, Ronnie,
Speaker 1: this is Mike from Staten Island. What's up, Mike from
Speaker 1: Staten Island? How can I improve your life today? I
Speaker 1: want to be an Instagram influencer. Right now, I have
Speaker 1: two followers, mostly high school friends. How can I gain more? Okay,
Speaker 1: I get this a lot. The answer is simple. Instagram
Speaker 1: loves sex appeal and it loves travel. So I always
Speaker 1: tell people, quit your job and become a pirate. Go
Speaker 1: somewhere sexy, like Somalia. Your Instagram will explode. Trust me, bro?
Speaker 1: Oh okay, um, is there a way I can gain
Speaker 1: Instagram followers without becoming a pirate? No, Bro, you are
Speaker 1: you kidding me? I just give you advice that's wolf
Speaker 1: like a billion dollars. You off the phone and go
Speaker 1: on the next flight to Mogo. D Shoot, Okay, I've
Speaker 1: had enough of you. Next callar, Hello, n one. My husband.
Speaker 1: He's gripping at his chest. I think he's having a
Speaker 1: heart attack. Oh hell yeah, Okay, some contact of our listeners.
Speaker 1: I recently got a life from post Malone. You pay
Speaker 1: a guy the phone company to read that. Right now,
Speaker 1: on one calls to your personal line, instant growth has Wow,
Speaker 1: it sounds like he's really suffering from a bad I
Speaker 1: don't know how I get connected to you. He's sending
Speaker 1: an ambulance. I don't think he's gonna make You're definitely
Speaker 1: not with that negativity. Don't hate job creat Okay, next collar,
Speaker 1: Mr Chang, This is agent Jim Peterson again with the
Speaker 1: Internal Revenue Service. Okay, that was a wrong number. You know,
Speaker 1: I've got a lot of haters at the i r
Speaker 1: S because of how successful I've been. Like, seriously, I'm
Speaker 1: the mother toters of giving vibes and the Wesley Snipes
Speaker 1: of paying taxes. All right, Next scholars, Ryan from Nashville,
Speaker 1: what's up, Buddy hey Man? Just finished reading your book. Nice?
Speaker 1: Thank you so much. For those who don't know, my
Speaker 1: new book, The Success Virus How to Infect Yourself with
Speaker 1: Winning is in stores now. Is two under and twenty
Speaker 1: pages of pure knowledge. Yeah about that. The first twenty
Speaker 1: page we're just bows, are you at plant Fitness? And
Speaker 1: then the lasts were just a knockoff of the Babysitters Club. Hey,
Speaker 1: don't knock the teenage Childcare Society. I mean talks with
Speaker 1: Disney Plus to make into a minister. Was no advice
Speaker 1: in the book at all. I want my money back, yeah,
Speaker 1: and I want my former assistance to stop telling people
Speaker 1: I have a lifetime band from Jiffy Lube. But we
Speaker 1: don't always get what we want. We get what we crush.
Speaker 1: That's crushing head brick right now. And when we're back,
Speaker 1: why have my special guests Daily show correspondent Royal And
Speaker 1: I'm gonna ask him if these ever snorted dog tranquilizers.
Speaker 1: Today's episode is sponsored by Doctor Manhood's Tissues for Men.
Speaker 1: Are you tired of goodly tissues that look like they
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Speaker 1: Today's episode of Hashtag Crushing is brought to you by
Speaker 1: Running Chanks Cursed Healing Crystals. Listen, bros. These crystals will
Speaker 1: change your life. I recently mowed down a witch with
Speaker 1: my tesla, and when I went to go check for
Speaker 1: the body, all that was there was a burlap sack
Speaker 1: filled with these crystals. Now I'm selling them to you
Speaker 1: for literally any amount of money. Please, I need them
Speaker 1: out of my house. I just tried to throw them
Speaker 1: in the river, but when I got back to my
Speaker 1: place there was more of them. Ryan Shanks cursed healing crystals.
Speaker 1: Oh god, they're glowing again. All right, we'll back, and
Speaker 1: we're joining out by a legendary guest. He's a correspond
Speaker 1: on The Daily Show with Trevor Noah and it looks
Speaker 1: like he could bench. I don't know thirty royand Jr.
Speaker 1: Is here. I actually I think I can bench preuss
Speaker 1: like one last I try. Okay, well that's pretty weak.
Speaker 1: What does that smell? It's dear carcus. Roy, you are
Speaker 1: crushing it. Man, you're crushing the two running. Yeah, I know,
Speaker 1: it's it's actually a problem. How hot I'm crushing it.
Speaker 1: I'm starting to affect the people around me and the
Speaker 1: people I love. Uh, Roy, let me let me ask
Speaker 1: you something. Uh you're like a stand up comedian, right,
Speaker 1: A lot of nights on the road lonely. How do
Speaker 1: you stay emotionally connected to your loved ones while maintaining
Speaker 1: focus on your career. I think the important thing when
Speaker 1: you're traveling is to take something from home on the road.
Speaker 1: I'm just kidding. No one cares about. Actually, there's my
Speaker 1: first real question. Have you ever done d MT? Uh? No,
Speaker 1: you have an inject horseplate list. I don't even know
Speaker 1: what that. You have a free base of stuff inside
Speaker 1: glow sticks. I'm not into that, Ronnie. I just can
Speaker 1: we just talk about some of the stuff I'm working on.
Speaker 1: I got a web series. But before that, let me
Speaker 1: just ask you. You ever take L S D and
Speaker 1: have a threesome inside an aquari of i'mould just answer
Speaker 1: a question about travel, Okay, alright, alright, answer the travel question.
Speaker 1: Go ahead, But you might have a crank of some
Speaker 1: chin up. So are you talk? Fine? Do whatever you
Speaker 1: need to do. Man, Look, when I'm on the road,
Speaker 1: I do my best to make sure that my family
Speaker 1: has spend number one priority. I face time with my
Speaker 1: I try to make sure that my son knows that
Speaker 1: I love him, So I FaceTime with Pain's just weakness
Speaker 1: exiting the bottom. So for me, it comes down to
Speaker 1: one question when I'm looking at what gigs would take,
Speaker 1: will this opportunity negatively affect my family life? Because I
Speaker 1: have to consider how many days I'm going to miss
Speaker 1: my family? For sure? Great great id. Thus, by the way,
Speaker 1: I'm not sure if you noticed me over there, just
Speaker 1: pulling up, just just ripping metal. So I gotta ask,
Speaker 1: you're doing no P November? What did hell is no
Speaker 1: P November? Well, you know you're in it for an
Speaker 1: entire month of November. I'm doing it. It's sick running
Speaker 1: November was last year, dude. November is a state of mind.
Speaker 1: Is that like no November where you don't masturbate to
Speaker 1: It's like that because it involves the penis, but instead
Speaker 1: of nodding, it's urine, so you haven't p for an
Speaker 1: entire That's right. The only p im into is P
Speaker 1: nine X. It's a powerful world because it's got numbers
Speaker 1: and letters in it. Speaking of power, do you ever
Speaker 1: eat a bald eagle. They're an endangered species. Why would
Speaker 1: I eat an patriotism bro I eat bald eagle and
Speaker 1: I feel America coursing through my veins. Okay, so I
Speaker 1: was watching your Last stand Out Special. Very funny stuff,
Speaker 1: by the way, I appreciate that. Thanks. I especially love
Speaker 1: the part where you talk about the nutritional benefits of
Speaker 1: elp meat and are you suld that was me you
Speaker 1: were watching. I didn't talk about elk am I special.
Speaker 1: I didn't talk about elk meat. Oh okay, Well, maybe
Speaker 1: I'm confused because I watched it on ten X speed
Speaker 1: finished a whole hour in six minutes. Anyway, you ever
Speaker 1: do an elk binge. That's where you killing elk and
Speaker 1: you have seventy two hours to eat the entire thing,
Speaker 1: including the bones. That's how Caveman lived. Caveman also had
Speaker 1: an average lifespan of seventeen years. They didn't have Tesla
Speaker 1: as a podcast. They didn't even speak English. That's a
Speaker 1: really good point. Elk meat is really lean and dense
Speaker 1: and nutrients. It feels it feels like I'm saying things
Speaker 1: and then you're just hearing words completely different from the
Speaker 1: words I'm saying like totally, that was so nineties, you know,
Speaker 1: all right? Can can I ask you a question? Shoot?
Speaker 1: Why are you like this? Why are you obsessed with
Speaker 1: caveman fitness routines, masculine diet, fats and drugs inside of
Speaker 1: glow sticks and eating eagle jerky? What happened to you?
Speaker 1: What made you this way? Wow? No one's ever asked
Speaker 1: me that before. Actually, you know what, I don't know
Speaker 1: if I can talk about this. No, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: you can, you can, man, you can just okay? Well, um,
Speaker 1: Ever since I was a teenager, I knew I was different.
Speaker 1: I was rebellious, and I fell in with the wrong crowd.
Speaker 1: I got into fast cause, extreme sports, trusty women. Okay,
Speaker 1: but that's that's pretty on power for the young guy.
Speaker 1: That's then one day my life changed. The government needed
Speaker 1: my extreme sports expertise to infiltrate the Russian terrorist cell
Speaker 1: in Central Europe. Okay, hold up, please let me get
Speaker 1: through this. The terrorist group known as Anarchy ninety nine
Speaker 1: had acquired a biochemical weapon and there was only one
Speaker 1: way to this on the missile, using my extreme sports
Speaker 1: capabilities and racing cars through the streets of product. Wait,
Speaker 1: so Anarchy you should. That was the name of the
Speaker 1: terrorists group. Yeah, okay, that's just the plot the Triple X.
Speaker 1: That was Finn Diesel. Who did all that? You didn't
Speaker 1: do that ship? They based that movie on me? No man,
Speaker 1: I'm full of urine. No p November. Remember I'm gonna
Speaker 1: go well the doors a lot from the outside, so
Speaker 1: that's not happening. Okay, that's another episode of hashtag Crushing,
Speaker 1: a success podcast for winners. Can'tlys plug my website. I
Speaker 1: hope you learned some new ways to hack your way
Speaker 1: through the jungle we call life. Thanks to my guests,
Speaker 1: Ray Woods Jr. Dis move. Thanks everyone. I gotta gota
Speaker 1: do cross fit with the founder of we Work. We're
Speaker 1: best friends until next time. Keep crushing that ship. WHOA.
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Speaker 1: Crush your greas. This has been a Comedy Central podcast