Speaker 1: Hell I Suck At Dating with Dengler Jared Haven and
Speaker 1: I heart radio podcast. Jared. You want to bring soon? Okay?
Speaker 1: Got you? Hey? Welcome back What is up? Skaters? Welcome
Speaker 1: to the all new episode of Help I Suck At
Speaker 1: Dating The Way It is over. We are finally back
Speaker 1: Jared and I both recording from our respective locations. Obviously,
Speaker 1: if you listen to last week's episode, it was Kaylin
Speaker 1: and I were co hosting. The week before that, Jared
Speaker 1: and actually we're co hosting this week. We are back
Speaker 1: to our standard format. We've got a great episode for
Speaker 1: you guys. Not only are Jared and I back together,
Speaker 1: but we also have Bibiana Julian from Bachelor Colton season,
Speaker 1: Bachelor Paradise, Bachelor Winter Games is gonna be joining us.
Speaker 1: She actually is hosting What a Girl Wants this week
Speaker 1: as well. More on that later, Jared, I haven't talked
Speaker 1: to you, actually, I don't think in a couple of weeks,
Speaker 1: aside from a couple of texts. So fill me in, man,
Speaker 1: what's going on? How are you just living to? Holidays
Speaker 1: are amongst us, but you know, COVID still around, so
Speaker 1: that's just ruining everything I'm doing. Well though. Ashley and
Speaker 1: I are are doing well. Families healthy, everybody's doing well.
Speaker 1: It's all you can ask for right now. Also, just
Speaker 1: to mention, we do have coming up on the podcast,
Speaker 1: just to tease, you know a little bit more. We
Speaker 1: have Justine and Caleb from Love Island us A season two, uh,
Speaker 1: and they left the show together and very happily in love.
Speaker 1: So we're gonna catch up with them and see what's
Speaker 1: going on in their world and in my world. Bro,
Speaker 1: I don't know, it's pretty boring. Like we're putting up
Speaker 1: a Christmas tree. That's always fun, so like celebrating the
Speaker 1: holidays very early because there's nothing else to do, Like
Speaker 1: it's you know what else are you gonna do? Let
Speaker 1: me ask you this. So you put the Christmas tree up,
Speaker 1: and this is in Rhode Island or this is in Virginia.
Speaker 1: So we're on the we're staying on the East coast
Speaker 1: for the holidays. Just we're gonna there's there's not much
Speaker 1: for us to be doing in l A. So we're
Speaker 1: gonna be here for the The tree is erect, but
Speaker 1: is it decorated at the moment currently being decorated We
Speaker 1: started last night, so yeah, Ashley's parents has a big
Speaker 1: four A and uh, the trees like twenty ft tall.
Speaker 1: It's like the New Year's Rocket, what is it the
Speaker 1: Rockefeller Center tree? Except better because if you saw pictures
Speaker 1: of that one, it's disgusting right now. Yeah, this one's great,
Speaker 1: and there's a lot of fun ornaments on there. There's
Speaker 1: child pictures of both Lauren and Ashley, which are both
Speaker 1: and equally embarrassing. So that's fun putting those right front
Speaker 1: and center in front of the front door. Um, and
Speaker 1: then yeah, I'm trying to think what else have I
Speaker 1: been doing? Man? Living a very board life. Oh, we
Speaker 1: were on Bachelorette. That was cool. I forgot about that.
Speaker 1: You guys were in the on the classroom date. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so that was a lot of fun to film. Let's
Speaker 1: talk about that a little bit. So you actually had
Speaker 1: a chance to kind of meet some of Tastia's guys
Speaker 1: obviously before we were introduced to them on the TV show.
Speaker 1: So what were I think you can speak freely on
Speaker 1: this because it's already aired and we already obviously know
Speaker 1: you're there. What were your first impressions of the guys
Speaker 1: that you were able to me? Which ones did you
Speaker 1: like which ones didn't you like? So have you been watching? Um,
Speaker 1: I watched the last episode and then the other couple episodes,
Speaker 1: like sporadically but not too deep. But you have like
Speaker 1: a general idea of who the guys are. Yeah, dude,
Speaker 1: she's got a good group. I'm not gonna lie when
Speaker 1: I at least on the group date. The guys that
Speaker 1: I met and interacted with all very down earth, all
Speaker 1: super cool. I really enjoyed just hanging around with them. Uh,
Speaker 1: and they were so fun and upbeat about the entire
Speaker 1: group date there, there didn't seem to be one person
Speaker 1: who was a Debbie downer. Bennett's the man Love Bennett,
Speaker 1: big fan of him. Um. He also knows the Winkl bosses,
Speaker 1: which is another reason why I'm a big fan of him.
Speaker 1: And uh, dude, it was fun. Like So we we
Speaker 1: went down to La Quinta a few months ago. We
Speaker 1: had to quarantine there, so they put us in a
Speaker 1: hotel room. But it was a nice little area that
Speaker 1: Ashley myself and of course Lois had to come she
Speaker 1: was there too, and we had a little backyard area. Um,
Speaker 1: so we had to stay inside, had our designated room
Speaker 1: for I think three full days before we could see anybody,
Speaker 1: and then on the fourth day we got tested, and
Speaker 1: then on the fifth day we got tested and as
Speaker 1: long as we had two negatives. On the sixth day
Speaker 1: was when we entered the bubble and filmed. It was cool.
Speaker 1: It was dude, you know, like, I don't know, have
Speaker 1: you done like any cameos in the show since being
Speaker 1: a cast member? I don't think so. Um, it's a
Speaker 1: lot better. You know how you're a cast member and
Speaker 1: you just you have no rights. You are you You're
Speaker 1: just not a human being at the time, Like you
Speaker 1: can't have your phone, you can't know anything, You're locked down.
Speaker 1: You just go wherever producers tell you, like here, man.
Speaker 1: It was just like as soon as we got our
Speaker 1: two negatives the morning before we filmed, like I walked
Speaker 1: down to the coffee shop, I talked to some of
Speaker 1: the producers, I saw Harrison like, it was just like
Speaker 1: you're a part of the crew. It was it's fun
Speaker 1: Do they have your phone or did you have your
Speaker 1: phone on yet? No, we had our phone the entire time.
Speaker 1: It was funny because when we originally went down to
Speaker 1: La Quinta, we thought we were going for Claire. I
Speaker 1: swear to God. So they called us about a week
Speaker 1: before we left and said, hey, could you guys come
Speaker 1: down for about a week because you have to quarantine
Speaker 1: stuff and be a part of Claire's group date. We
Speaker 1: said sure, yeah, of course, And when we went down
Speaker 1: there still assumed that we were going to be on
Speaker 1: a date with Claire. And then on the second or
Speaker 1: third day we were quarantined to the hotel room. I
Speaker 1: was looking at my phone and all of a sudden,
Speaker 1: all these rumors that started blowing up that Claire was
Speaker 1: leaving the Bachelor, and I thought that Ashley about it,
Speaker 1: and it was like, there's no way this is happening. Well,
Speaker 1: it's obviously a farce and it's it's a whole bunch
Speaker 1: of nothing. And then it started really picking up steam,
Speaker 1: uh with social media. So then Ashley and I, because
Speaker 1: we have a little back door area with a fence,
Speaker 1: so we were standing on chairs just looking out to
Speaker 1: see if we could see anything, whether we could see
Speaker 1: Tashia walked by, or if we could see Claire, or
Speaker 1: just get any information because here we are in the
Speaker 1: Bachelor at Bubble where they're filming, and we have no
Speaker 1: idea what the hell is going on. So it was
Speaker 1: actually quite a fun few days trying to just gather
Speaker 1: information and then finally h the after we tested negative
Speaker 1: once the producer was allowed to come in with a
Speaker 1: mask on and uh, and he was like, so Tacious
Speaker 1: a bachelor, right, and uh, you will not be going
Speaker 1: on a group date with Claire, You'll be doing a
Speaker 1: group day with Taia. Um. So it was. It was.
Speaker 1: It was kind of wild there for a little while,
Speaker 1: but it was fun. Man. It's always fun going back.
Speaker 1: And it's weird to say because as you know, like
Speaker 1: it's amazing how they can kind of not I don't
Speaker 1: want to say screw you over, but you know, they're
Speaker 1: out to make a television show. And I still love
Speaker 1: the production. I still love the show. I it feels
Speaker 1: it's gonna sound really corny, but it feels like my family.
Speaker 1: And it felt like that when we went down to film,
Speaker 1: because we saw all the producers and hung out with them,
Speaker 1: and like I said, we got to, you know, hang
Speaker 1: out with Chris Harrison, which out him on the phone
Speaker 1: for a little while afterwards, and um, and in seeing Tasia,
Speaker 1: who we've been befriended over the past couple of years. Well,
Speaker 1: you know she came to so many I heart and
Speaker 1: festivals in Tahoe, and um, it was it was cool.
Speaker 1: It just felt it feels really nice to have a
Speaker 1: sense and you get this too, like a sense of
Speaker 1: belonging nous to something, and that's what we get with
Speaker 1: the show. Yeah, I would know what that feels like
Speaker 1: because they've never asked me and kill him to do anything.
Speaker 1: So the belonging this that you feel is lost on
Speaker 1: me since I have never been I've never feeling. But
Speaker 1: this isn't This isn't about you guys invited back to
Speaker 1: do the What was it you guys did the interview
Speaker 1: for the and you know they're inviting Ashley and I'm
Speaker 1: just an extension of that. Irrelevant, irrelevant anyways, what were
Speaker 1: your first impressions of the guys? Was there? I know
Speaker 1: you said you liked a lot of them. A lot
Speaker 1: of them are down to earth and humble. Was there
Speaker 1: anyone that kind of rubbed you the wrong way? Seriously? No,
Speaker 1: that was the crazy part. We're expecting some sort of
Speaker 1: villain or somebody who's gonna stir up some drama, and
Speaker 1: nobody did. No. Granted, the nature of the group date
Speaker 1: was very lighthearted. You know, we twizzed the guys on
Speaker 1: math and geography and then we did like this, you know,
Speaker 1: uh pull what is it? Pull tug whatever the hell
Speaker 1: it is. He didn't sound right, but you know, pull tuggy.
Speaker 1: Uh what was I saying? Oh? And then there's actually
Speaker 1: one part of the date that got edited out, but
Speaker 1: it was it was fun. So there was this bag
Speaker 1: of all feminine products and the guy, so one guy
Speaker 1: was sitting in a chair facing away from the other
Speaker 1: guy who his his teammate, who had to pick a
Speaker 1: product out of the bag and try to explain what
Speaker 1: it was to the guy who couldn't see, and then
Speaker 1: the guy who couldn't see had to guess what the
Speaker 1: product was. So that was a lot of fun. You know.
Speaker 1: They would pull out like obviously one that was used
Speaker 1: was a tampon or a maxi pad, and they were like, oh,
Speaker 1: it goes, it's it stops. You know, this happens once
Speaker 1: a month and this thing like goes and stops, you know,
Speaker 1: and so it was. It was It was quite hmicle
Speaker 1: um h, dude, nobody run me the wrong way like
Speaker 1: I'm trying to, you know, I know, Chason and Ed
Speaker 1: had their big drama throughout the episode, but that really
Speaker 1: didn't show its colors on our group date. That must
Speaker 1: have happened much later. Um, yeah, what was it awkward
Speaker 1: and Bennett leaning in for that kiss? Oh yeah, it
Speaker 1: was super awkward. It was great though, because it's so
Speaker 1: it's such a Bennett move, you know. So we awarded
Speaker 1: Bennett with the the Grown ass Man plaque and of
Speaker 1: course he stood up there with his bathrobe as if
Speaker 1: he was in front of the paparazzi, like posing with Tasha.
Speaker 1: It's like, oh god, and then he went in for
Speaker 1: a kiss in front of all the other dudes. And
Speaker 1: I don't think it wasn't that Tasha didn't want to
Speaker 1: kiss Bennett. I actually think she's she's kind of intrigued
Speaker 1: by him, but you just don't do it in front
Speaker 1: of other guys. And I could all of us knew,
Speaker 1: Like Tasha just felt so awkward because she's like, I
Speaker 1: everybody's watching and okay, we're kissing. Um, so it was.
Speaker 1: It was. It was pretty cringe worthy, but it's you know,
Speaker 1: it almost didn't matter because it's better and he's such
Speaker 1: a caricature of himself that it's you know, you kind
Speaker 1: of just laugh at it. Does it make you didn't
Speaker 1: make you miss being on the show at all? No,
Speaker 1: Oh my god, it made me so happy that we
Speaker 1: weren't a part of the show. Not to say, like
Speaker 1: I said, I love the show. I love everything about it.
Speaker 1: But as you can attest, being on the show itself, uh,
Speaker 1: is not as glorious as it appears. You know, you're
Speaker 1: very restricted on where you can go, what you can do.
Speaker 1: You're cut off from the outside world. You can't talk
Speaker 1: to family or friends. Um. You know, especially for these guys,
Speaker 1: there's no traveling involved, so they don't really have quote
Speaker 1: unquote days off because when you travel on the show,
Speaker 1: you get to at least not be on camera and
Speaker 1: miked up. You can kind of just not feel like
Speaker 1: you're walking on eggshells constantly. And these guys don't get
Speaker 1: it because they're just they're stuck at this resort. Uh.
Speaker 1: And then we'll see that again obviously Matt James season,
Speaker 1: because they're filming right now, and uh, I think Pittsburgh.
Speaker 1: I think that's where the resort is. But no, man,
Speaker 1: it didn't make me miss being on the show. Is
Speaker 1: his season and filming entirely in Pennsylvania, Yeah, they're doing
Speaker 1: the same thing. They rented at a resort once again,
Speaker 1: and they're going to film all in one location. Oh,
Speaker 1: I just figured that they were going from resort to
Speaker 1: resort within the US, but that guess that makes more
Speaker 1: sense for them to be over there. But you didn't
Speaker 1: make a good point, because the fondest days that I
Speaker 1: have to remember our time on Bachelorrette war the days
Speaker 1: of traveling, like when we were in Norway and we've
Speaker 1: got to like just walk around with no Mike's, no
Speaker 1: cameras or anything like that and just like kind of
Speaker 1: like like cooper around for the entire time. Do you
Speaker 1: have camera that's like your favorite of from filming? Um,
Speaker 1: I don't know about that. I just remember specifically when
Speaker 1: we were in Denmark. Uh. It was like me, Peter
Speaker 1: and Alex and Adam all went into like this big
Speaker 1: fish market together and like spent the day explaining the
Speaker 1: fish market and we were like, you know, like drinking
Speaker 1: beer and like getting good food and like all this
Speaker 1: stuff that you would just do on a normal day,
Speaker 1: like if you were a tourist in Denmark. Uh, And
Speaker 1: those were the days that were like those were the
Speaker 1: actually like you, like you said, you're not walking on eggshells.
Speaker 1: You can actually like kind of like relax a little bit,
Speaker 1: uh and like let like let loose and like laugh
Speaker 1: and crack jokes at each other. Like obviously you're doing
Speaker 1: all those things otherwise, but it just like was a
Speaker 1: less pressure. I guess you could say that day. Um,
Speaker 1: and you're right, these guys not having that, like that's
Speaker 1: gotta be brutal because those are the only days that
Speaker 1: you could use to like decompress. And if you can't
Speaker 1: decompress and you're so yeah, you need that. You need
Speaker 1: like I've realized that I need guy time. You know,
Speaker 1: I need to just be able to say things that
Speaker 1: I don't have to be concerned about saying in front
Speaker 1: of my friends and not be judged for you know,
Speaker 1: that's why golf is so great. You know, it's like Vegas.
Speaker 1: What happens on the golf course stays on the golf course. Well,
Speaker 1: let me ask you this, of all the guys and
Speaker 1: having met a few of them and now seeing them
Speaker 1: on television, which ones are your front runners? Uh? So
Speaker 1: Ben is definitely a front runner. They definitely had some
Speaker 1: chemistry between the two of them. He was on the
Speaker 1: group date I'd say this guy, no uh, the mustache guy,
Speaker 1: the guy that you know, it's just like the poor
Speaker 1: man's version of you no offense to Noah. Uh knows.
Speaker 1: You know, very good looking man, but you know, there
Speaker 1: are very few Deans in the world. And so he
Speaker 1: had the mustache and then obviously shaved it off. And
Speaker 1: there's only one man. Ashley and I said this, uh um,
Speaker 1: we did like this recap forty News and we said
Speaker 1: this that there's only one guy in the franchise that
Speaker 1: can have a mustache, and that man is Dean, and
Speaker 1: Dean is allowed to have that mustache whenever he wants. Um. Thanks,
Speaker 1: I appreciate that. I'd say no, uh, I'd say Ben,
Speaker 1: And then I guess those are like my two very
Speaker 1: front runners as of right now. But it's also I'm
Speaker 1: just basing this off the last episode, so who the
Speaker 1: hell knows what's gonna happen. You know, it's funny because
Speaker 1: I've got it. I had a man crush on Ben too.
Speaker 1: Watching the season. I was like, oh my god, he's
Speaker 1: so cute. He seems smart while spoken, he's like super invitation.
Speaker 1: I like Ben, and then like the more I watched him,
Speaker 1: and then I think I like creeped his Instagram and uh,
Speaker 1: Cayl and I were sitting right next to each other
Speaker 1: as we were doing all this, and I was like,
Speaker 1: I started getting major f boy vibes from him, and uh,
Speaker 1: obviously it takes one to know one, you know, So
Speaker 1: I think that speaking from experience here, Uh, but I
Speaker 1: do agree. I still think he's probably my front runner
Speaker 1: as well, but I would try proceed with caution were
Speaker 1: in the atatious shoes. I agree with you. I like Ben,
Speaker 1: but he does seem to just say the right things
Speaker 1: way too much. It doesn't seem authentic. It seems like
Speaker 1: he's not playing a playbook, but like, you know, saying
Speaker 1: what he thinks he should say, which I guess is okay,
Speaker 1: because you know, when you first start dating someone, you
Speaker 1: just want to, you know, make the best first impression
Speaker 1: you can. But unfortunately, within the bachelor world, because everything
Speaker 1: is so sped up, you need to kind of just
Speaker 1: let that part go and just dive right into a
Speaker 1: relationship and not worry about any type of first impressions.
Speaker 1: You know, you want to know what I really like
Speaker 1: to that I think is maybe an unpopular opinion. Is
Speaker 1: I like Ed oh, I like it. Well, I like that.
Speaker 1: I just wish you would let go of whatever the
Speaker 1: Chasing feud he has. Yeah, well, that's thing. I think.
Speaker 1: I dislike Chasing so much that I like, I like,
Speaker 1: I'm empathizing with Ed's wolverine, Baby Wolverine. You don't want
Speaker 1: to see Wolverine. I can't believe you did the clause
Speaker 1: I met Chasing. Very nice guy, but dude, I cannot
Speaker 1: believe you did the clause. He legitimately you don't want
Speaker 1: to see the wolverine, and I was like, oh, Jesus Christ,
Speaker 1: I'm surprised he didn't like that. I figured love Man
Speaker 1: would like that more than anything. Dude, I love Logan,
Speaker 1: Hugh Jackman, big fan. But my god, could you imagine
Speaker 1: if I I love Man? That was so cringe worthy.
Speaker 1: That was so bad. I'll never forget that. That was
Speaker 1: obviously a a a partnership decision. Let me just say
Speaker 1: that wasn't me alone, Love Man. Jesus Christ. Oh god, hey,
Speaker 1: I think it was a great I think it exemplified
Speaker 1: you in and well perfectly, and unfortunately it did. Unfortunately,
Speaker 1: once people met me, they were like, oh, yeah, this
Speaker 1: totally makes sense now that dude is that dude is
Speaker 1: love man? But but yeah, I agree o Ben, Uh,
Speaker 1: it is my sleeper. I think Bennett obviously has to
Speaker 1: be in there because he I think he went to
Speaker 1: Harvard or something, right, Yeah, he's too much of a
Speaker 1: big character to be let go. Now he has to
Speaker 1: like at least make it top six. Yeah, but it'll
Speaker 1: be interesting to see what happens. I think, Uh, because
Speaker 1: this is your first season that you've actually like cameoed
Speaker 1: on the main season, right, because you've been on Bachelor
Speaker 1: Paradise a couple of times since then. I know that,
Speaker 1: but yeah, Paradise, but yeah, this is uh the first
Speaker 1: time yeah, we ever did a bachelorette Uh cameo. It
Speaker 1: felt cool. It was just you know, I'm assuming that
Speaker 1: they can't get the actual celebritisy, like so they have
Speaker 1: to go with previous cast members because of COVID and quarantining.
Speaker 1: You know, Ashton Kutcher is not going to quarantine in
Speaker 1: the Bachelor bubble to make a cameo, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean. So, but for all those days you quarantine too.
Speaker 1: It was a flat fee. It wasn't much obviously, but
Speaker 1: that's besides the point. Like just being asked to go back.
Speaker 1: Is I've for Ashley and me? What Matt, there's most
Speaker 1: it's just cool that, you know, not to rub it in,
Speaker 1: but we felt we felt pretty cool. Dude, you and
Speaker 1: Caitlin are definitely gonna get asked back. Okay, that sounds
Speaker 1: really cool. It sounds like you guys had are really
Speaker 1: fun time. Um, all right, well, we do have a
Speaker 1: couple of great guests coming up. Like we said, next up,
Speaker 1: you know her you love her from Colton season? Is
Speaker 1: that what we said? She's also on Winter Games, she
Speaker 1: was on Paradise, She's been on all the show's big
Speaker 1: hit fan favorite. But I think she was on our season.
Speaker 1: I take it back, Oh, she was on our season.
Speaker 1: That's my bad. I misled you. So our season Bachelor,
Speaker 1: Winter Games, Bachelor in Paradise. Yeah, I'm just gonna blame
Speaker 1: you for that, absolutely as you should. She's coming up next.
Speaker 1: We're gonna talk to her for a little bit. We're
Speaker 1: gonna see what's going on in her life, and then
Speaker 1: we're gonna jump to our Love Island interview as well,
Speaker 1: So stick around for that. We will be right back. Hey,
Speaker 1: well come back to help. I suck at dating all
Speaker 1: you suck Army. We have a very special, wonderful, beautiful
Speaker 1: guest who is on the line right now. I'll tell
Speaker 1: you my wife, Ashley speaks of this person so highly.
Speaker 1: I'm not joking. I mean, it's Bibiana, but be Beyona,
Speaker 1: I'm not joking. When Ashley says that you might be
Speaker 1: the prettiest girl that's ever been on the Batchelor, I
Speaker 1: swear to god she said this before, so it's beyond
Speaker 1: a Julian everybody, thank you. That's her reach. Because I
Speaker 1: feel that the ladies that go on this show are
Speaker 1: all extremely beautiful. So I love Ashley so much. She's
Speaker 1: like the best hype girl. I know you guys, I
Speaker 1: know it sucks. I wish you guys hung out more.
Speaker 1: I know you lived down in Florida. Um, because you
Speaker 1: were obviously on Winter Games, a season that I don't
Speaker 1: speak of. But that's okay, But you guys became really
Speaker 1: close throughout that experience. Yeah, Ashley was awesome. Um yeah,
Speaker 1: we won't get into Winter Games. Yeah. Oh no, it's
Speaker 1: all right. I'm just teasing. Um. So how are you
Speaker 1: what are you up to? How's life? I'm good? I mean,
Speaker 1: life is life is going it's just funny. I was
Speaker 1: catching up with one of the producers that I'm pretty
Speaker 1: close to and she's like, how are you, And I'm like,
Speaker 1: I am twenty right now. Um, it's just like lots
Speaker 1: of ups and downs, normal stuff. I have like really
Speaker 1: good weeks and in other weeks it's just like one
Speaker 1: does this year end, Oh my gosh, but overall very
Speaker 1: good and healthy, so I can't complain good. I see you.
Speaker 1: That's the big takeaway too. As long as we're staying healthy,
Speaker 1: that's the most important thing. Right, How are you guys doing? Oh,
Speaker 1: we're doing well. I'm actually so Like I said, I
Speaker 1: see that your Christmas tree is up. We're putting ours
Speaker 1: up currently right now. Uh. It's a it's a big
Speaker 1: tree though, so it's taking a lot of extensive work.
Speaker 1: But it's a it's a family uh situation. We're all
Speaker 1: putting some work into this, except for Ashley. She gets
Speaker 1: away with it. I don't know why. It's ridiculous, um,
Speaker 1: but but we're doing well. I think it's the same
Speaker 1: thing to twenty. Like, it's just so many ups and downs,
Speaker 1: and it's crazy because even when this year ends, I
Speaker 1: see it on TikTok all the time, but I kind
Speaker 1: of believe it a little bit where everybody's like counting
Speaker 1: down the new year. It's like three to one, round two,
Speaker 1: and it's like, yeah, I don't know if this is
Speaker 1: gonna end in twenties. So hopefully, I'm I'm hopeful that
Speaker 1: like once the weather starts turning in spring summer of one,
Speaker 1: we're gonna be back into some sense of normalcy. I
Speaker 1: agree with that. I don't want to be the grant
Speaker 1: or anything for you guys, but I just want to
Speaker 1: refresh your memories, maybe the listeners memories as well. It's
Speaker 1: only November. It is actually of this recording November, and uh,
Speaker 1: what are the Christmas trees doing up already? That's my question, bro,
Speaker 1: It's get into the holiday spirit. Just because it's doesn't
Speaker 1: mean it's a holiday a year long. Yeah, when we
Speaker 1: have we just want something to look forward to. And uh,
Speaker 1: my sister actually has she has three Christmas trees growing up.
Speaker 1: I'm going up. I'm at my sister's house. This one's
Speaker 1: already decorated. She has another one by the dining table,
Speaker 1: and she's going to put another one by the entrance
Speaker 1: of the house. So I mean, I guess I respect
Speaker 1: the festiveness of it. But my family really loves Christmas.
Speaker 1: Like for my dad's birthday last year, his birthdays in July,
Speaker 1: we had a Christmas lunch where we degraded a tree.
Speaker 1: We hosted like a Christmas dinner. It's just like they
Speaker 1: love Christmas. This is in July. You're saying, so that's
Speaker 1: like kind of like a half Christmas. Yeah, they love
Speaker 1: Christmas six months. It's a six month countdown to Christmas.
Speaker 1: Bro get with the times. I don't know. I've never
Speaker 1: been a big fan of Christmas. I don't know why, really,
Speaker 1: I guess, yeah, I don't know. I guess uh. I
Speaker 1: think maybe the lack of a nuclear family has made
Speaker 1: me kind of just shy away from the Christmas celebrations.
Speaker 1: But that's not to say I'm not happy for you
Speaker 1: guys forgetting your trees up. I do love a good
Speaker 1: well that created Christmas tree. Jared was saying, he's got
Speaker 1: all these pictures of himself or I'm sorry, I like
Speaker 1: Ashley Lauren when they were kids. Uh, we U see
Speaker 1: that same thing. We always had these like ski passes
Speaker 1: from when we were like toddlers that we would hang
Speaker 1: on a Christmas tree that rows really funny? Uh, but
Speaker 1: I don't know, but be hones, do you have any
Speaker 1: fun decorations that you put on your Christmas tree? Your
Speaker 1: your sisters, I guess, and my sisters are so type
Speaker 1: A they want to make sure everything's perfect that I
Speaker 1: kind of just asked, like where should I put this?
Speaker 1: Because every time I feel that I get involved, I
Speaker 1: do something wrong. So I kind of just let them
Speaker 1: take the lead, like you guys decide. They picked the theme,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, how can I how can I participate? Um?
Speaker 1: Because both of them were like mom mode, like everything
Speaker 1: has to be perfect, and my god, maybe I got
Speaker 1: a question for you. So you are. For the listeners
Speaker 1: that haven't listened to last week's What a Girl Wants,
Speaker 1: go check that out because Bibby hosts that episode of
Speaker 1: What a Girl Wants for us. But Babby, I want
Speaker 1: to talk more about what you discussed on that episode
Speaker 1: because you talked about a lot of you, like your
Speaker 1: emotions post show. Right Yeah. I co hosted it with
Speaker 1: a girlfriend of mine, Brittany Burger. She is a fantastic
Speaker 1: like motivational speaker, and she's also an author. She wrote
Speaker 1: a book when she was twenty five, and she just
Speaker 1: has like all this energy. Um, and we just kind
Speaker 1: of dove into like dating, what are deal breakers for us?
Speaker 1: A lot of what we talked about how to do
Speaker 1: with like when you're dating and energy, just like following
Speaker 1: your into relation and then things like do you agree
Speaker 1: of your like your boyfriend having a best friend of
Speaker 1: the opposite sex? You know, like those type of topics. Um,
Speaker 1: what do you guys think? I'm always curious to like
Speaker 1: pick a guy's brain on this. It's a very complicated. Uh.
Speaker 1: I agree. I agree, it's super complicated. I mean you
Speaker 1: ended up with your best friend, yeah, I mean I did. Now.
Speaker 1: Funny enough, my other best friend is also a female,
Speaker 1: and she's the one who signed me up for the Bachelor,
Speaker 1: but she's far more of a sister. I find that
Speaker 1: you are allowed to have friends of the opposite sex
Speaker 1: as long as your partner is also friends with them
Speaker 1: as well. You can't, like I've heard situations where like
Speaker 1: a guy will be friends with a girl and then
Speaker 1: the wife is not allowed, like isn't really close with
Speaker 1: the girl, and there's like some weird animosity there because
Speaker 1: they're both females, and it just creates always a bad situation.
Speaker 1: So I find that if you have a friend that's
Speaker 1: the opposite sex, make sure that your partner feels comfortable
Speaker 1: with them, that they're friends with them as well, and
Speaker 1: then that usually smooth things over. Yeah, I agree. I've
Speaker 1: always been an advocate for having friends of the opposite sex.
Speaker 1: I I think you can kind of go both ways.
Speaker 1: It's like, let's say you're dating someone and you have
Speaker 1: a best friend or like a really good friend who
Speaker 1: is the opposite sex, and the person that you're dating
Speaker 1: like starts to say that they're not comfortable with you
Speaker 1: hanging out with them, then in my opinion, it's kind
Speaker 1: of like, well, like a you should trust the friendship
Speaker 1: for what it is as a friendship, right, Like I
Speaker 1: don't saying why you would not let me or whoever
Speaker 1: it is hang out with someone just because of your
Speaker 1: own in securities and so like that kind of to
Speaker 1: me is a red flag for the relationship rather than
Speaker 1: like discontinuing a friendship over it. Um. But that's just
Speaker 1: my take on it. Like, for for instance, I have
Speaker 1: a really good girlfriend back in l A who is
Speaker 1: also friends with kalin Um, And I want to say,
Speaker 1: like when I was younger, I would be fearful of,
Speaker 1: like I wanted to hang out with her because of
Speaker 1: just I don't know, upsetting my girlfriend or whatever. But
Speaker 1: as I've gotten older, I've been able to, I guess,
Speaker 1: distinguish everything a little bit better. But that's I guess
Speaker 1: that's just my take on it. I think I think
Speaker 1: they're okay. I think the totally permissiool as long as,
Speaker 1: like Jared said, communication is very is paramount, uh and
Speaker 1: as long as your significant other is also friends with
Speaker 1: that person or maybe not like best friends as you
Speaker 1: would be, but like at least like cordial and friendly
Speaker 1: enough to where you kind of like know what's going
Speaker 1: on at all times, you know what I mean? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I I agree with that. I had a partner last year.
Speaker 1: The guy that I was dating last year, he had
Speaker 1: many girlfriends that he was really close to, and I
Speaker 1: never felt insecure about it. I also think it's like
Speaker 1: his approach to it, where as soon as we met,
Speaker 1: like it was around other friends, and he was really
Speaker 1: comfortable with like bringing me along to anything that he
Speaker 1: did with his best girls, like his best friends that
Speaker 1: were girls, or like even if he took he took
Speaker 1: a trip with one of his girlfriends to go visit her,
Speaker 1: and I never felt uncomfortable at all. I think it
Speaker 1: has a lot to do with like how confident and
Speaker 1: the guy is in setting those boundaries and welcoming you
Speaker 1: into those friendships. Um, it's kind of what you just said,
Speaker 1: like it's totally permissible, it's okay as long as you
Speaker 1: know your partner is included in it. I've only felt
Speaker 1: insecure in situations like that, where and where it's like
Speaker 1: they've been intimate and they're still communicating and it's not
Speaker 1: really a friendship. It's more like just the lingered, like
Speaker 1: you know, situation ship that kind of just like they're
Speaker 1: still holding onto some like sexual feelings kind of thing, right, Right,
Speaker 1: Those are the times where I'm like, well, is this
Speaker 1: really a friendship if there's like any type of sexual
Speaker 1: chemistry between the two of them and they're being weird. No, no,
Speaker 1: no, no no, that's a red flag. That's something that you
Speaker 1: need to put a squash too. Yeah, And I think
Speaker 1: it's hard as women to kind of identify those boundaries
Speaker 1: with like not feeling like damning crazy like I don't
Speaker 1: want to be the girlfriend. But I guess in my situation,
Speaker 1: I've had experiences where yes, my my partner had a
Speaker 1: lot of girlfriends and I never felt uncomfortable. And then
Speaker 1: I've had a partner that still carried on relationships from
Speaker 1: his past that weren't actual friendships and that made me
Speaker 1: feel uncomfortable. So as women, sometimes it's hard to like,
Speaker 1: am I following my intuition? Like how do I set
Speaker 1: these new boundaries without him feeling that I'm trying to
Speaker 1: be controlling? Because that's not what I want out of
Speaker 1: a relationship. You know, like you want to be able
Speaker 1: to have your partner feel like you can be free
Speaker 1: and you know, have these friendships. But I think at
Speaker 1: certain points, like if your guy isn't coomfortable with welcome
Speaker 1: you into these friendships, and there's like, I don't know
Speaker 1: about that red flag mm hmm, massive red flag. So
Speaker 1: we talk about that, We talk about um sleeping on
Speaker 1: the first date, if it's like a good thing or
Speaker 1: a bad thing, mainly just because like I feel like
Speaker 1: as women as well, like sometimes it's a double edged sword.
Speaker 1: I think guys can get away with it a little
Speaker 1: bit more and then just energetically, like we don't think
Speaker 1: it's a bad thing if you're if you don't want
Speaker 1: a relationship and you kind of just want to mess
Speaker 1: around and like figure out what you're doing in life.
Speaker 1: By all means, welcome it. But I do feel that
Speaker 1: sleeping on the first date or really early on in
Speaker 1: your relationship when you're trying to call in or manifest
Speaker 1: like a partner, can be conflicting. So if you're trying
Speaker 1: to like have a boyfriend, you kind of have to
Speaker 1: set your boundaries to figure out like whether you really
Speaker 1: like this guy or not before sleeping with him, Versus
Speaker 1: if you just kind of want to do your thing
Speaker 1: and have fun, then totally like it doesn't really matter
Speaker 1: what happens. And I've been in I mean, I'm definitely
Speaker 1: have been in situations where I've slept with the guy
Speaker 1: early on and then a relationship comes from it. But
Speaker 1: it's not really like the common thing, you know. I
Speaker 1: think like sometimes it's the exception. I've got a question
Speaker 1: for you, do you mind updating us on your current
Speaker 1: dating life? Yeah? So I didn't talk about it in
Speaker 1: this episode with What a Girl Wants. I was super reserved,
Speaker 1: but then I went on to uh, the almost famous
Speaker 1: podcast with Ben and Ashley and those two man it's
Speaker 1: just like whom you can't escape it whatsoever. They're pros man,
Speaker 1: they get you man like talk about and it's so smooth.
Speaker 1: It's like I can't and I'm such a bad liar.
Speaker 1: And then when you're doing these like via zoom, it's
Speaker 1: just like I can't avoid this. I I am seeing someone.
Speaker 1: It's been really nerves like. I guess it's nerve wracking
Speaker 1: for me because my last relationship, I was super open
Speaker 1: about it, super happy and then very public, and then
Speaker 1: when it didn't work out, it was really hard to
Speaker 1: take that hit. Um. So with this one, it really
Speaker 1: happened unexpectedly, like we met early on in the year,
Speaker 1: and then he doesn't live in Miami, so you know,
Speaker 1: he would come back and forth and visit, and then
Speaker 1: COVID happened, so we quarantined together. Um, and then that
Speaker 1: was I think really difficult for us because it was
Speaker 1: really lovely. It felt like basically a little bit of
Speaker 1: a honeymoon stage, but our relationship wasn't well established. And
Speaker 1: I guess this is why I can relate to like
Speaker 1: setting your boundaries prior. You know, we kind of just
Speaker 1: like grew into really feeling like damn, we really like
Speaker 1: each other, and then I wanted to protect that, like
Speaker 1: I didn't really want to be so open about it because, um,
Speaker 1: I think I'm at the stage also where I'm ready
Speaker 1: to like take things slow to figure out, like, Okay,
Speaker 1: is this going to be a partner that I feel
Speaker 1: comfortable being public with? And also sometimes I feel like
Speaker 1: it's okay to not be public about everything. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: I couldn't agree more. It's crazy to how much it changes,
Speaker 1: Like you know, the remember like the term Facebook official
Speaker 1: of like what five is six or seven years ago
Speaker 1: that was like a big step. But then now all
Speaker 1: of a sudden, you have, you know, however many Instagram followers,
Speaker 1: and becoming like Instagram official quote unquote becomes an even
Speaker 1: bigger step. And it's like then you become immediately tied
Speaker 1: with the person that you're like you're announcing your relationship with,
Speaker 1: and then if things don't work out, then there's like
Speaker 1: there's just like a whole weird process that you none
Speaker 1: of us are like equipped to handle. It's so crazy
Speaker 1: how social media has changed the dating game, because, like
Speaker 1: you said, if you're dating in real life, but you don't,
Speaker 1: for example, change your Facebook status from single to in
Speaker 1: a relationship. I feel like it causes insecurities in the
Speaker 1: relationship because it's like, well, why can't you tell your
Speaker 1: friends or your family or make it public that we're dating?
Speaker 1: And then you're like, wow, I just kind of want
Speaker 1: to take it slow. And then and then it creates
Speaker 1: doubt in the other person's mind because then they're like, well,
Speaker 1: are you trying to hide me? Are you trying to
Speaker 1: hide something else? Is there a reason why you're not
Speaker 1: making a public And it's crazy how social media has
Speaker 1: become this conversation and dating that just never was there before.
Speaker 1: I guess it's kind of good because it also brings
Speaker 1: it brings more light to people who are being sketchy
Speaker 1: within a relationship, because not only do you have to
Speaker 1: you know, be uh committed in a private way, but
Speaker 1: you also have to be committed in a public way.
Speaker 1: But it's just insane to me, you know. And I
Speaker 1: guess we've been pretty lucky. I mean, I've been very
Speaker 1: lucky just because over the past few years, you know,
Speaker 1: being in such a public relationship, it's just you know,
Speaker 1: you're actually and I kind of, you know, had many
Speaker 1: conversations early on about like, all right, we're just gonna,
Speaker 1: you know, put it out there. But it's uh, I
Speaker 1: think it's so hard. Um. I love that both of
Speaker 1: you guys have your like your relationships or public, so
Speaker 1: then it can just be something that you don't really
Speaker 1: have to think about when it comes to social media
Speaker 1: and makes it like it's just like a graceful transition
Speaker 1: because the whole world already knows you're together. Um, but
Speaker 1: even things like this is I mean, my my friend
Speaker 1: might kill me for this. But you know, I was
Speaker 1: catching up with a good friend of mine the other
Speaker 1: day and she's been dating this guy or whatever, and
Speaker 1: just like naturally, you start talking about your best friends
Speaker 1: and the people that are involved in your life, and um,
Speaker 1: she noticed, I guess, like they talked about me and
Speaker 1: how was I was on the show or whatever. She
Speaker 1: noticed that he started to follow me. But I've never
Speaker 1: met the guy. So she's like, I don't know, it
Speaker 1: like made her feel uncomfortable, and I think it would
Speaker 1: make me feel uncomfortable too, and so I don't know.
Speaker 1: She's like, I don't know how to approach this because
Speaker 1: it's like such a my like it's such a like
Speaker 1: not an issue, you know, it's so trivial but now
Speaker 1: like navigating with social media and getting to know someone,
Speaker 1: and you know, I tried to really challenge her and
Speaker 1: be like, okay, forget that it's me. What's really at
Speaker 1: the core of like why did this actually really bother you?
Speaker 1: But essentially it's just like what do you like, how
Speaker 1: would you feel if a girl is like, hey, you
Speaker 1: just started following one of my really good friends that
Speaker 1: you haven't met that like I just told you about,
Speaker 1: and it kind of made me feel weird, like what
Speaker 1: do you guys do in that? Like, oh, I it's
Speaker 1: so funny because uh so one of Ashley's friends ex
Speaker 1: boyfriends now um was always in the mix and would
Speaker 1: you know, watch the show or you know, kind of
Speaker 1: know people through Ashley and me, and then he'd follow
Speaker 1: them and a lot of them are are single girls
Speaker 1: from the show and like you said, all the girls
Speaker 1: that go on Bachelor are stunning, and so he would
Speaker 1: follow some of them and then like some of their
Speaker 1: pictures and it always made Ashley's friends super uncomfortable because
Speaker 1: it's not like you're doing anything wrong because you're just
Speaker 1: following somebody, but like, why why are you following? Why
Speaker 1: are you liking like bikini photos. I don't know it was.
Speaker 1: It's so weird. It adds such another layer to dating
Speaker 1: that's already such a complicated issue. You it's exhausting. I
Speaker 1: I'm glad we're all in relationships. Yeah. So I gave
Speaker 1: myself a rule early on last year, well at the
Speaker 1: beginning of this year, really that like anybody that I met,
Speaker 1: I wasn't going to try to find them on social
Speaker 1: media because I think that we can perceive all these
Speaker 1: things like what if there's an old girlfriend picture, like
Speaker 1: all these things and like all like red flags that
Speaker 1: pop up to you that maybe you're just making up
Speaker 1: based on past experiences in your own insecurities. So I
Speaker 1: made it a point. I'm like, I'm not going on
Speaker 1: this guy's instagram. If I like somebody, I'm just not
Speaker 1: going to judge and based on like what they post
Speaker 1: or what they do, I want to get to know
Speaker 1: this person or whatever. So I have this rule, like
Speaker 1: don't follow him on social media, like don't look at
Speaker 1: his page, because then you start to style. And this
Speaker 1: is something that I've experienced, and it's so hard once
Speaker 1: you open the gates of like trolling, like I mean
Speaker 1: like when you just like go deep down into this
Speaker 1: you find out who that person's second grade science teacher was.
Speaker 1: It's a nightmare and it's just like, why would I
Speaker 1: expose myself to this? You know? So I have like
Speaker 1: my partner now, I do not follow him on Instagram,
Speaker 1: like he's not very active on there. But um, it's
Speaker 1: something that I implemented in the beginning and then just
Speaker 1: felt like, you know, maybe it's my own fears attached
Speaker 1: to it that like, in the event like something doesn't work,
Speaker 1: I just don't want to go through the whole like,
Speaker 1: oh now I have to follow him. But more so
Speaker 1: I think it's based off of just respect and then
Speaker 1: sometimes you know, being someone I'm not saying that like
Speaker 1: I'm relevant anymore, but the fear of just like that
Speaker 1: social anxiety of someone like knowing and like having this opinion.
Speaker 1: I mean, hey, Caitlin and I don't follow each other
Speaker 1: on Instagram and we're happily a year and a half
Speaker 1: into our relationship. So really, I think I think you're
Speaker 1: onto something. I think that there's something to be said
Speaker 1: about a minute. You don't follow Klin never have, never
Speaker 1: will shut up? Does she follow you? Nope? Shot, I'm
Speaker 1: I'm I'm fact checking this right now. Look, I I
Speaker 1: agree with everything is Mayby is saying. It's like all
Speaker 1: you all it does for you is get yourself in
Speaker 1: your own head, especially in the beginning stages like now,
Speaker 1: sure it would be a little bit different because Cayleen
Speaker 1: and I have like a deeper understanding of each other,
Speaker 1: but especially like in the beginning, all you're doing is
Speaker 1: like setting yourself up to kind of get in your
Speaker 1: own head. Uh, but yeah, I don't know. I agree.
Speaker 1: What do you What do you find Jared? Oh my god,
Speaker 1: she doesn't follow you? Holy because I looked at her
Speaker 1: Instagram first, because I'm it's very believable that you don't
Speaker 1: follow her, which she doesn't follow you. Wow, it makes
Speaker 1: me feel less alone. I love this. We just totally
Speaker 1: start a movement like don't follow the people you're you're
Speaker 1: dating or you like, and beyond beyond that too. It's
Speaker 1: it's especially people uh that have a mask to follow
Speaker 1: in any sort of way. It's like, let's set you
Speaker 1: and your partner get on the rocks and like you
Speaker 1: guys unfollow each other for a short amount of time.
Speaker 1: Then people recognize that and they're like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: there's trouble in Paradise whatever. But like if you never
Speaker 1: follow each there in the first place, it's like no
Speaker 1: one's got any basis to like make these audacious claims
Speaker 1: about Um. So yeah, I think there's some method to
Speaker 1: the madness, Baby, I think you should keep it up.
Speaker 1: I think there's uh. I think it's a good move.
Speaker 1: But for the listeners out there that want to get
Speaker 1: more Bibby and why wouldn't you be sure to check
Speaker 1: out her What a Girl Wants episode to check out
Speaker 1: Baby on Instagram. If you're interested in dating her, be
Speaker 1: sure not to follow her because that is not the
Speaker 1: method anymore. But Babby, thank you so much for joining us.
Speaker 1: We appreciate it. Thank you for being the host of
Speaker 1: What a Girl Wants this week. Um, it's good to
Speaker 1: hear that things are going well for you. Thank you
Speaker 1: for having me. Guys, it was really good to see
Speaker 1: both of you. It was to take care stay safe
Speaker 1: by guys. All right. Well that was Baby from The Bachelor,
Speaker 1: Bachelorinner Games, Bachelor Paradise. We've always talked about that. Be
Speaker 1: sure check her out on What a Girl Wants that
Speaker 1: aired the other day. Stick around, we have a Justine
Speaker 1: and Caleb from Love Island. Coming up next, we'll go
Speaker 1: back to help I suck at dating. Of course, I
Speaker 1: am joined by Dean unlearned. We have two wonderful guests
Speaker 1: that are on the line on the zoom line right now.
Speaker 1: Now you watch their love story unfold on Love Island,
Speaker 1: which just wrapped up season two in the United States. Uh.
Speaker 1: It is Justin Dieba and Caleb Corporw who won Love
Speaker 1: Island season two. Congratulations, guys, thank you so much for
Speaker 1: joining us. Thank you, Oh my god. Of course, Well,
Speaker 1: my first question obviously, I'll do Justine first, because lazies
Speaker 1: ladies first, of course, what was your experience filming like?
Speaker 1: And did you really think you were going to find
Speaker 1: love on Love Island? Um? So, I was definitely hopeful
Speaker 1: that i'd find love on Love Island. I came in
Speaker 1: there so ready. I was like, I love love. I'm
Speaker 1: passionate about love. So I was like, I'm ready to
Speaker 1: go in there and find the real thing. Um And yeah,
Speaker 1: I just like, I was super hopeful. I was not
Speaker 1: expecting to actually find it, but I was hol how
Speaker 1: about you, kale Um. I definitely did not expect to
Speaker 1: find it. That's kind of last thing I thought would
Speaker 1: actually happen in such a short amount of time. Um,
Speaker 1: but it was a wonderful experience, like going in there
Speaker 1: and getting close to someone in such a short amount
Speaker 1: of time. That was awesome, but not what I expected
Speaker 1: going into it. I gotta I got a question for
Speaker 1: you guys. So I'm not much of a reality TV watcher,
Speaker 1: which is funny because obviously the only reason all of
Speaker 1: us are here is because we all went on reality television.
Speaker 1: Explain this format for Love Island a little bit. Jared
Speaker 1: said that you guys won, But what exactly does winning?
Speaker 1: Uh like constitute a hundred thousand dollars? Really? Well? And
Speaker 1: was a thousand dollars split by two and Uncle Sam? I? Yeah,
Speaker 1: but which you were very sweet to split. I mean
Speaker 1: that was like the least dramatic moment on the season, though,
Speaker 1: because we all knew you were going to keep the money.
Speaker 1: Did that thought even cross your mind that you were
Speaker 1: going to keep the hundred thousand dollars and not share
Speaker 1: with Justine? There was zero percent chance of me keeping
Speaker 1: any of the money. I would have gave it all
Speaker 1: to her before I split it, just because I know
Speaker 1: that America would have just dragged me. Sure, I wouldn't have.
Speaker 1: Thankfully that wasn't option, because America honestly would have been
Speaker 1: mad if I split it. Instead, they're giving it all
Speaker 1: to her, So I'm glad that wasn't even option. So
Speaker 1: what what makes you guys the winners? Then? Did you
Speaker 1: have to? Like? There are the couples on the show?
Speaker 1: I would imagine, right, is there like some sort of
Speaker 1: competition format or something near the end that you guys
Speaker 1: were able to beat out the other couples for or
Speaker 1: how does that work? Yeah, so towards the end, America
Speaker 1: gets to the vote on their favorite couple. Got you? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. I'm so far out of the loop with
Speaker 1: this stuff, even like Bachelorette. I haven't watched any of
Speaker 1: that stuff. I'm just slacking. I know I need to
Speaker 1: get like the cables and scripture in the I know,
Speaker 1: I know, I'm very fraudulent. Well, the thing is, I
Speaker 1: don't have cable in the van, so it's like, what
Speaker 1: am I supposed to do? I gotta your I got
Speaker 1: e Leonan Jared to keep me updated. He's been keeping
Speaker 1: me in the dark on all this stuff. Lives in
Speaker 1: a van. It's a very big thing. I literally just
Speaker 1: found this out as you said it aground on that
Speaker 1: real quick gup of time. Yeah, well we'll jump into
Speaker 1: it maybe off air. I'm sure Jared's got some more
Speaker 1: questions too. I got some questions for you guys too.
Speaker 1: So you guys both said you were open to love.
Speaker 1: And that's funny too, because I feel like a lot
Speaker 1: of people that go on Bachelor, Bachelorrette are very similar.
Speaker 1: They're like, well, I'm open to the idea, but I
Speaker 1: just want to have a fun adventure and see what
Speaker 1: comes of it, too, And that seems like what happens
Speaker 1: with both of you guys too, right, And so you
Speaker 1: guys are still together, right? Yeah? Why why are we
Speaker 1: recording in separate separate households? It looks like, well, if
Speaker 1: this was in five hours, you could do it in
Speaker 1: the same spot. But my flight doesn't leave it for
Speaker 1: another two and a half hour. So so, Justine, you
Speaker 1: live in Jersey, right in Caleb you live in l A. Yeah,
Speaker 1: So have you guys talked about move? Yeah, because I
Speaker 1: I read that you guys when you guys left the show,
Speaker 1: I assumed that your boyfriend girlfriend, But you guys have
Speaker 1: said that you're not right and coming out with the
Speaker 1: heavy hitters. Just I'm coming out. That's what I do.
Speaker 1: There's no jabs in my game. It's all right hook.
Speaker 1: It's one right hook and that's it. Yeah. Well, I'm
Speaker 1: headed to see her in Jersey tonight. Actually, we're gonna
Speaker 1: meet the fam. You know, you gotta get that blessing
Speaker 1: in person. We're gonna meet with friends. We're gonna go
Speaker 1: on a normal date without cameras and microphones. Um, and
Speaker 1: now we can start taking like normal steps in the
Speaker 1: right direction. We don't want to recount ourselves in anyway.
Speaker 1: So we were like, let's just take this one step
Speaker 1: at a time. So that's what we're doing. No, that's
Speaker 1: very smart. I mean you get out of experience like that.
Speaker 1: I mean, Dina and I can relate where everything is
Speaker 1: so heightened and dramatic. I think it's probably best to
Speaker 1: just take a step back and slow things down. And
Speaker 1: it's a good way to start by meeting the family. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm a little nervous, but I think they'll they'll show
Speaker 1: me some love. Yeah, definitely. Yeah, I agree. I think
Speaker 1: it's a good call around. Caleb, I'm creeping your your
Speaker 1: Instagram right now. You guys are a very attractive couple too.
Speaker 1: I just had to pump that out. Um. I got
Speaker 1: a question for you guys both as well. Is there
Speaker 1: anything that you kind of came out of the process
Speaker 1: having learned about yourselves? Um, because you kind of get
Speaker 1: put through the pressure cooker, right, So is there anything
Speaker 1: that you could look back on and be like, oh,
Speaker 1: I learned this about myself during that time. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: mean I definitely did. Um. I know you guys didn't
Speaker 1: really like watch it, but I had a pretty hard
Speaker 1: time in there. So I was like struggling with watched it.
Speaker 1: Oh well, I didn't see the whole thing, but I
Speaker 1: saw most of it, and I saw pretty much a
Speaker 1: lot of what you guys. I saw your My favorite
Speaker 1: moment is when you, guys, obviously Caleb, you told Justine
Speaker 1: that you loved her and wherever the Nevada somewhere? Is
Speaker 1: that like the Grand Canyon? Where the hell Arizona Grand
Speaker 1: Canyon was? Yeah, so I'm sorry to interrupt, just in
Speaker 1: continue please, No, it's okay. I'm glad you watched some
Speaker 1: of it. Um. So, I actually had a really hard
Speaker 1: time early on in the beginning, and so it kind of,
Speaker 1: you know, I took a few gut punches, Like my
Speaker 1: self confidence was really low, but UM, I was able
Speaker 1: to just kind of get my confidence back learn a
Speaker 1: lot of self love coming out of there. So that
Speaker 1: was my biggest thing for me leaving Nice love it.
Speaker 1: What about you, Caleb, what did you learn about yourself
Speaker 1: going through that process? UM? I think, like heading into
Speaker 1: the process of like even trying to be casted for
Speaker 1: the show, like you're, I was, you know, kind of
Speaker 1: like a heightened version of myself. UM. And I walked
Speaker 1: in there with what going into it, I like perceived
Speaker 1: this confidence, you know, UM, But then when you go
Speaker 1: into like a controlled environment where you're constantly like talking
Speaker 1: about your emotions and feelings, which is not something I
Speaker 1: would usually get in the past, UM kind of revealed
Speaker 1: that like that with was an area that I was
Speaker 1: lacking confidence in. UM. Or when you have to cover
Speaker 1: yourself up with baby oil and rip your pants off
Speaker 1: in front of millions of people at home watching it,
Speaker 1: you know, that's not something I would normally ever do.
Speaker 1: But because you're in there and you're in this control environment,
Speaker 1: you find like the courage to do that. So I
Speaker 1: feel like I walked out of there with like it
Speaker 1: just a total different perception of what confidence actually is
Speaker 1: and like have a better sense of like self assurance.
Speaker 1: So how is long distance been? That's my question because
Speaker 1: there's a lot of people going through long distance relationships
Speaker 1: right now, and you guys obviously lived pretty much as
Speaker 1: far away as you can from each other. So what
Speaker 1: are some of the things that you guys do to
Speaker 1: make sure that you keep the relationship in love happy?
Speaker 1: What's you guys, Justine? What's you guys? If you from
Speaker 1: my phone right now, we're gonna um no, So we
Speaker 1: have a lot of fall calls, which is definitely helpful.
Speaker 1: It's just like weird coming out of the villa too
Speaker 1: and having each other's numbers and being able to talk
Speaker 1: on the phone, like it's so new for us. But um,
Speaker 1: that's definitely the main way. We don't get to FaceTime
Speaker 1: a lot. You guys have an iPhone alright, Oh just
Speaker 1: stem Android for life? Why you gotta adapt, You gotta
Speaker 1: gotta get the iPhone? If nothing, but just to face
Speaker 1: time with galub right now, I'm going to see the
Speaker 1: only reason I consider it, But I have WhatsApp. We
Speaker 1: can video chat on there all the time. But he
Speaker 1: hates it. Yeah, no, I mean I can see exactly
Speaker 1: why you guys are waiting to make the decision of
Speaker 1: whether you're gonna be a boyfriend and girlfriend. You don't
Speaker 1: know these things when you're on the show. You know,
Speaker 1: you found out she was an Android user on the show,
Speaker 1: and I didn't even know this live together for a months,
Speaker 1: didn't even know you texted. You text, the green bubbles
Speaker 1: pop up, and you're like, oh, I get myself into
Speaker 1: their phone, not on what's going on? I can't, man,
Speaker 1: you know what's funny? So when I did started dating, uh,
Speaker 1: my girlfriend now my wife. Actually, we were friends for
Speaker 1: like three years before we started dating, and it was
Speaker 1: always very easy to talk to her. I never felt awkward.
Speaker 1: And then as soon as we started crossing from friendship
Speaker 1: to relationship, I started awkwardly texting her like I was
Speaker 1: overthinking everything I was saying and I and I was
Speaker 1: like typing something and then thinking to myself, that's so
Speaker 1: stupid and erasing it and then typing something different. And
Speaker 1: then I was like, what am I doing? I've known
Speaker 1: this girl for three years? Why am I so awkward? So,
Speaker 1: Caleb and Justine, I was curious if you guys kind
Speaker 1: of went through through something similar because obviously you went
Speaker 1: through this intense experience where you told each other that
Speaker 1: you love one another, and then you get back into
Speaker 1: the real world and you're like, oh, like I don't
Speaker 1: even know how to text someone and I've already told
Speaker 1: him I loved them, So did you Like, was that
Speaker 1: kind of like, for lack of a better term, just
Speaker 1: like mess with your mind a little bit? I mean, yeah,
Speaker 1: we're going through it right now. Like just even you
Speaker 1: on the topic of texting. You know, we have only
Speaker 1: interacted up until this point, um, face to face. Every
Speaker 1: single one of our conversations had been face to face,
Speaker 1: and then it was until we left that we had
Speaker 1: to talk on the phone. It wasn't until we left
Speaker 1: we had to decipher each other's text messages. Um, And
Speaker 1: like we're having to just figure out a totally differently,
Speaker 1: a totally different way to communicate. Um, I'm a really
Speaker 1: really really bad text or I'll take the blame for that.
Speaker 1: But like even just before um, we hopped on this,
Speaker 1: I was it was like six minutes ago, Like I
Speaker 1: haven't talked to in a few hours. Let me at
Speaker 1: least pick up the phone and caller. So it's not
Speaker 1: like we're just seeing each other's faces for the first time,
Speaker 1: you know, on this call. So like this there's no
Speaker 1: we don't have like a consistent pace yet, but like
Speaker 1: we're trying to figure out as we go. I think
Speaker 1: we're doing okay so far. Just no, I think we're
Speaker 1: also definitely figuring each each other out in different ways.
Speaker 1: Um and just like I think the biggest thing for
Speaker 1: us is like reading each other's tone through text message.
Speaker 1: So a lot of the times just tell me when
Speaker 1: you're up, Like, I like, I can't read your mind.
Speaker 1: So it's one of those things where it's like I
Speaker 1: tend to overthink some things and then he's trying to
Speaker 1: read my like mood or tone over text message. So
Speaker 1: I think that's definitely the hardest part. And I'm like,
Speaker 1: we need this trip right now, Like we just need
Speaker 1: action again. It's so funny too, because it's so contrary
Speaker 1: to how it normally is. Like out in the real world,
Speaker 1: you basically are flipping it backwards. Whereas if you guys
Speaker 1: met in real life, you would like be texting each
Speaker 1: other and calling each other before you really knew each
Speaker 1: other that well. But in this case, you guys got
Speaker 1: to know each other really well, just face to face
Speaker 1: for the whole month that you guys, you know, you
Speaker 1: lived together, like you said, and now you're forced to
Speaker 1: kind of like kind of not even like take a
Speaker 1: step back, but just like learn how that person operates
Speaker 1: on their phone, which is a big part of a relationship,
Speaker 1: especially along distance one. You know. Yeah, so yeah, I
Speaker 1: can see that's a challenge. I've got a question for
Speaker 1: you guys. How did you guys both get on the show?
Speaker 1: I always love a good like origin story of the
Speaker 1: person and how they ended up on the show in
Speaker 1: the first place. Was it your friends, your family? Did
Speaker 1: you put yourself up for it? How did that all happen?
Speaker 1: I think her story is a bit better than mine mine. Yeah, um, yes,
Speaker 1: we'll judge that. I actually applied. One of my friends
Speaker 1: was like, Justine, you crushed this, like you'd be really great.
Speaker 1: I was like, I mean, say, last, so I put
Speaker 1: on the application and it's not that great of a story.
Speaker 1: They picked me. But I think that the same person
Speaker 1: that chose Caleb and the person that chose me. I
Speaker 1: think it was the same person, was it not. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: we got casted by like the same person, Yeah, the
Speaker 1: same casting producer. Yeah, very cool. They knew, they knew
Speaker 1: that you guys were going to be America's favorite couples
Speaker 1: in heaven in Hollywood. Hollywood was in Hawaii. Yeah, we're
Speaker 1: in Vegas. We're on They turned the Cromwell Hotel has
Speaker 1: Drey's Nightclub on top of it. Okay, and they turned
Speaker 1: into a village film in last year. But everything going
Speaker 1: on in Love Island turned into Love Vegas. But you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. If you're ever going to find
Speaker 1: love in a place, isn't it nice to do it
Speaker 1: in Vegas? Isn't Vegas like you know, where everybody gets
Speaker 1: married anyway? For sure? I think it's our first time
Speaker 1: in So that's cool. First time in Vegas story for sure. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's really cool. Where you met somebody you fell in
Speaker 1: love with and who knows what the future has in
Speaker 1: store for you guys with Justine Caleb, we can't thank
Speaker 1: you enough for coming on. We really appreciate it, guys,
Speaker 1: America's favorite couple from Love Island Season two. Now, of course,
Speaker 1: you you guys are on all social platforms YouTube, TikTok, Twitter, Instagram.
Speaker 1: You can follow Justine at Justine Joy three one two,
Speaker 1: and you can follow Caleb again on all the same
Speaker 1: social media platforms at c x CEO underscore explanation point,
Speaker 1: how did you get that user name right? There's no
Speaker 1: exclamation point that might just oh oh, that's just the
Speaker 1: end of the sessions for me. Never mind, no explanation
Speaker 1: point just at c x c oh never mind, very cool,
Speaker 1: Justine Caleb, thank you so much for Thank you guys.
Speaker 1: It's so crazy. I'm so excited to meet you guys. Yeah. Likewise,
Speaker 1: Caleb travel safely out to Jersey. We're looking forward to
Speaker 1: some updates from you guys. Yeah, thank you guys so much.
Speaker 1: We appreciate it. It's good being here, of course. Best
Speaker 1: of luck. All right, welcome back another episode of help
Speaker 1: I Suck at Dating in the books. But before we go, Jared,
Speaker 1: I know you are just itching to get to something
Speaker 1: over there. So what do you got for us? Well,
Speaker 1: we have an email, and I have a dating term.
Speaker 1: This dating term actually is brought to you by Plenty
Speaker 1: of Fish because Ashley and I have been doing this dine. Addition,
Speaker 1: we do dating terms with with plenty of Fish as well,
Speaker 1: and uh, this one, I thought it would be interesting
Speaker 1: to see what you would think the definition of the
Speaker 1: dating term is hey and pray, Hey and pray, Hey
Speaker 1: and pray? Tell me, is it h e y and
Speaker 1: pray or h a y? Oh? Wasn't it's pray p
Speaker 1: r e y p r a y like jumping in
Speaker 1: the hay or finding a needle in a haystack. No,
Speaker 1: it's hey, h e y like hey and pray. Is
Speaker 1: it like pray or is it like pray like praying mantis? Oh,
Speaker 1: like pray like you're about to be eing. No, it's pray.
Speaker 1: So it's p r A y and hey, h e
Speaker 1: I y Okay, Well, Hey and pray must be then
Speaker 1: I'll take this one first. Guys. It's got to be
Speaker 1: just like, uh, you know, when you're drunk and single
Speaker 1: and it's two AM and you're going home and you
Speaker 1: just basically fire off a bunch of U up texts
Speaker 1: the hay and praise that same method, you're just uh
Speaker 1: shooting had a bunch of hays and seeing how many
Speaker 1: bites you get back. So it's like the spray and
Speaker 1: pray method is you just kind of close your eyes,
Speaker 1: shoot from the hip and see what you hit what
Speaker 1: you hit. The hey and pray method has to be
Speaker 1: something similar. You fire out a bunch of hays from
Speaker 1: the hip, which everyone's land. Then you kind of go
Speaker 1: from there, Mark, what do you think? I mean? I
Speaker 1: agree with THEE and I also it's funny. I also
Speaker 1: saw this as h a Y when you first read it,
Speaker 1: so I was thinking, you hit the hay with somebody
Speaker 1: and then and then you pray that it turns into
Speaker 1: something more than what I stand. So that's where I
Speaker 1: was going. But the h E y and pray. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm with the and this is just putting it out,
Speaker 1: putting out a bunch of hayes and praying that something
Speaker 1: comes of it. On dating apps, right, Yes, you guys
Speaker 1: are obviously both correct hey and pray. I'm trying to
Speaker 1: get the official definition. But it is when you send
Speaker 1: multiple haze and never hear back, so it's like, hey, hello,
Speaker 1: how are you? What's up? Where somebody, like mostly this
Speaker 1: happens with a guy will send like six or seven
Speaker 1: text one person to one person before the other person responds,
Speaker 1: so it's just your thrown haze out there and you're
Speaker 1: praying for a response. I feel like guys do this
Speaker 1: too much, like listen and you send a text out
Speaker 1: there if she doesn't respond. I think you give it
Speaker 1: like a day or two, you send another feeler out
Speaker 1: and if she doesn't respond to that, cut it off.
Speaker 1: Question for you both, how many Hayes do you drop
Speaker 1: until the praying stops? I think Jared's right. I think
Speaker 1: it's two. I think I think any more than two.
Speaker 1: It's like with the text when when your whole, when
Speaker 1: when you can fill up your iPhone screen and everything
Speaker 1: you see is blue, you need to back off and
Speaker 1: let that person respond or give up. Yeah, it's two max.
Speaker 1: If you start doing three or four, you're gonna be
Speaker 1: labeled the stalker, whether you are or not. So just
Speaker 1: send out one, like swallow your pride, send out a text,
Speaker 1: and then if you don't hear anything and you really
Speaker 1: like this person, send out another one. And if they
Speaker 1: don't respond, I'm sorry, it's over. I I wish I
Speaker 1: could tell you something more optimistic, but it's over. You
Speaker 1: might have lost the love of your life. I don't know,
Speaker 1: but she ain't texting back, all right, Jared. I got
Speaker 1: a question here from Sydney. She wants to know Dean
Speaker 1: and Jared if you were the bad slurre out of
Speaker 1: the thirty plus contestants, how many of them would be
Speaker 1: considered ex girlfriends. So I think she's saying, like, after
Speaker 1: the fact, after the season has done filming, you're engaged
Speaker 1: to your fiance or whatever, how many would you consider
Speaker 1: to be your ex girlfriend from the show. It's maybe
Speaker 1: too most likely just one, most likely just one. I mean,
Speaker 1: all right, let me ask you this, d both of
Speaker 1: us were fourth. Do you consider Rachel an ex girlfriend? Yeah? Sure?
Speaker 1: Why not? We mean? Sure? Why not? Is it a
Speaker 1: yes or no? I think I do say it, uh,
Speaker 1: But I say it kind of like comically, you know,
Speaker 1: because I know in my heart of hearts that it's
Speaker 1: not that she wasn't uh, And I don't consider that,
Speaker 1: but I just think that it's it's just more it's
Speaker 1: funnier to say that, you know what I mean. Uh,
Speaker 1: But I do agree maybe one, maybe one other, but
Speaker 1: I think even one is a stretch. I would say
Speaker 1: I wouldn't really consider any of them. I'm sure Rachel
Speaker 1: doesn't look back and think any of it. She's got
Speaker 1: any ex boyfriends from our season, and I'm sure Caitlin
Speaker 1: doesn't look back looks at for Sean obviously, but I
Speaker 1: don't know. I'm curious if Caitlin will consider Nick and
Speaker 1: ex boyfriend. I think she would because I think when
Speaker 1: you have top two, those are pretty intimate relationships. And
Speaker 1: I think Rachel if I mean, I can't speak for her,
Speaker 1: but I'd be curious if Rachel considers Peter an ex boyfriend.
Speaker 1: What do you think you're friends with Peter? I would
Speaker 1: be shocked. I would be shocked if either them considered
Speaker 1: each other their own exes. Like if Rachel considered Peter
Speaker 1: and ex and Peter considered Rachel. Well, I guess I
Speaker 1: don't know that I say, I could be mistaken, but
Speaker 1: I would still I'm leaning towards saying that they don't
Speaker 1: consider because especially like you come out of it and Gage,
Speaker 1: Rachel is now married to Brian. It's like, I don't
Speaker 1: think that she would ever consider her like origin story
Speaker 1: of how she met her fiance while she was also
Speaker 1: girlfriends too, you know a couple other guys on the show.
Speaker 1: I think it's just like she's always dialed in on Brian. Interesting. No, no, no,
Speaker 1: that's a good take. I like it. And that was
Speaker 1: also a question from Sydney, who's an avid listener to
Speaker 1: the podcast. US we appreciate you Sydney, you're awesome. Uh.
Speaker 1: She's d m to me a couple times on Instagram.
Speaker 1: We've talked about the podcast and how much a fan
Speaker 1: of a fan she is. So thank you Sydney for
Speaker 1: the question. We really appreciate it. Uh. And I think
Speaker 1: that will do it For this week's help I Suck
Speaker 1: at Dating. Uh. Big thank you to Bibiana. Make sure everybody,
Speaker 1: if you haven't already listened, go check out What a
Speaker 1: Girl Wants. It dropped last Thursday. It's a great episode
Speaker 1: with Bibiana. She's fantastic. Big thank you to Caleb and
Speaker 1: Justine from Love Island. We wish them nothing but the best.
Speaker 1: Big thank you to you Dean for being awesome. Uh.
Speaker 1: Big thank you too, Like we said, Sydney. Uh. And
Speaker 1: I guess that's really it. Um. So hopefully everybody out
Speaker 1: there has a great and safe Thanksgiving UM, and make
Speaker 1: sure you tune in next week, where hopefully we all
Speaker 1: suck a little less. Follow help by Suck at Dating
Speaker 1: on I Heart Radio or wherever you listen to podcast.