WEBVTT - Playbook for Navigating Uncertainty With Paralympian Amy Purdy 0:00:03.240 --> 0:00:05.840 No one has all the answers, but when we ask 0:00:05.880 --> 0:00:10.639 the right questions, we get a little closer, closer to truths, 0:00:11.440 --> 0:00:16.560 closer to each other, even closer to ourselves. I'm journalist 0:00:16.600 --> 0:00:19.280 Danielle Robe, and each week, my guests and I come 0:00:19.360 --> 0:00:22.800 together to challenge the status quo and our own ways 0:00:22.800 --> 0:00:27.360 of thinking by daring to ask what if, why not? 0:00:28.320 --> 0:00:29.080 And who says? 0:00:30.480 --> 0:00:30.600 So? 0:00:30.680 --> 0:00:35.920 Come curious, dig deep, and join the conversation. It's time 0:00:36.280 --> 0:00:44.199 to question everything. Resilience talk is well everywhere, stay strong, 0:00:44.440 --> 0:00:47.919 push through, bounce back, and on its surface, those words 0:00:47.960 --> 0:00:50.360 are meant kindly, right, But I think they skip the 0:00:50.400 --> 0:00:53.760 part that nobody writes about, or talks about, or wants 0:00:53.800 --> 0:00:56.240 to talk about, the middle, the part where your life 0:00:56.320 --> 0:00:59.320 doesn't look anything like you thought it would and no 0:00:59.400 --> 0:01:02.200 one is coming to hand you a new blueprint. I 0:01:02.240 --> 0:01:04.679 know that we've all been there, and here's the truth. 0:01:04.880 --> 0:01:08.319 Resilience doesn't feel powerful when you're living it. It feels 0:01:08.360 --> 0:01:12.400 disorienting and lonely, and a lot of the time it 0:01:12.480 --> 0:01:15.920 just feels like surviving. So what does it actually look 0:01:16.040 --> 0:01:18.880 like to rebuild a life, your whole life, when every 0:01:18.920 --> 0:01:23.559 certainty you've known changes. Well, Today's guest Paralympian Amy Purty 0:01:23.840 --> 0:01:30.720 has had to answer that question not once, but twice. 0:01:31.680 --> 0:01:34.600 At nineteen years old, Amy lost both of her legs, 0:01:34.760 --> 0:01:37.399 and what followed could have been a story about limitations. 0:01:37.760 --> 0:01:40.880 Instead it became a story about possibilities. 0:01:41.280 --> 0:01:44.120 When I lost my legs at nineteen, I fought for 0:01:44.240 --> 0:01:47.960 my life from the hospital. I lost my legs, my kidneys, 0:01:48.200 --> 0:01:51.600 my spleen, and the hearing in my left ear overnight, 0:01:51.880 --> 0:01:55.720 all at once. My life completely changed. So I had 0:01:55.760 --> 0:01:57.440 no idea what my life was going to be like. 0:01:57.600 --> 0:02:00.440 I'd never even seen somebody who had too prosthetic, so 0:02:00.480 --> 0:02:03.560 I didn't really even know what the possibilities were. But 0:02:03.680 --> 0:02:07.360 what I did know was that I was still me, 0:02:07.880 --> 0:02:11.240 and I still had my dreams at my goals. I 0:02:11.360 --> 0:02:14.440 wanted to define my own life, and that really took 0:02:14.480 --> 0:02:18.400 me on this journey of figuring out what the possibilities were, 0:02:18.400 --> 0:02:20.280 and it ended up taking me further than I ever 0:02:20.320 --> 0:02:21.040 could have imagined. 0:02:21.400 --> 0:02:25.320 Amy has embraced every challenge. It's so wild when you 0:02:25.320 --> 0:02:27.920 hear her talk about it. She never even entertained the 0:02:28.000 --> 0:02:30.680 idea that her dreams were out of reach. She became 0:02:30.720 --> 0:02:34.800 a three time Paralympic medalist in snowboarding and beyond competing, 0:02:34.840 --> 0:02:38.160 she was instrumental in advocating for snowboarding's inclusion in the 0:02:38.160 --> 0:02:41.320 twenty fourteen Paralympic Games in the first place. She did 0:02:41.360 --> 0:02:44.640 all of that through her nonprofit Adaptive Action Sports. She 0:02:44.720 --> 0:02:47.400 then became a finalist on Dancing with the Stars. A 0:02:47.520 --> 0:02:51.560 world renowned speaker, author, and someone who has continuously redefined 0:02:51.600 --> 0:02:55.720 what's possible, not just once, but over and over again. 0:02:56.040 --> 0:02:58.399 And what I think is one of the most interesting 0:02:58.440 --> 0:03:02.000 aspects of Amy's story isn't just what she's accomplished, it's 0:03:02.000 --> 0:03:04.600 how she thinks. She lays it all out in her 0:03:04.639 --> 0:03:07.760 new book, Bounce Forward, which includes the tools she used 0:03:07.800 --> 0:03:11.600 in her most uncertain times. They're tools that all of 0:03:11.680 --> 0:03:15.280 us could benefit from. So today, the question we're circling 0:03:15.880 --> 0:03:18.919 is if the most defining moments of our lives are 0:03:18.919 --> 0:03:21.480 the ones that we never saw coming, how do we 0:03:21.560 --> 0:03:25.040 learn to trust ourselves in the middle of the unknown. 0:03:25.480 --> 0:03:34.360 It's time to question everything with Amy Party, Amy Party, 0:03:34.400 --> 0:03:37.200 I'm so happy to be speaking to you. We're doing 0:03:37.200 --> 0:03:39.400 this on a Saturday, which feels like such a give 0:03:39.520 --> 0:03:41.680 on your end, so thank you for being here. 0:03:41.920 --> 0:03:43.560 Oh my gosh, are you, kitty, and I would be 0:03:43.600 --> 0:03:44.720 here any day of the week. 0:03:44.880 --> 0:03:48.360 So I think people know a lot of parts of 0:03:48.400 --> 0:03:50.680 your amazing story, and I want to start somewhere a 0:03:50.720 --> 0:03:53.920 little bit different. I want to talk about dreams a 0:03:53.960 --> 0:03:58.120 little bit. Your life had some really surreal, glamorous and 0:03:58.360 --> 0:04:02.520 unexpected moments, but I think this is my favorite one. 0:04:03.320 --> 0:04:06.520 I want to know if this is true, Madonna sexed 0:04:06.520 --> 0:04:09.960 you up over twenty years ago. If this is true, 0:04:10.000 --> 0:04:11.200 I need the whole story. 0:04:11.800 --> 0:04:14.920 Oh my gosh, I haven't told the story in so long, 0:04:15.000 --> 0:04:17.120 and I love that you started here because you know what. 0:04:17.200 --> 0:04:21.000 This is a story I don't usually get to talk about, right. So, yes, 0:04:21.160 --> 0:04:24.120 Madonna sexed me up. I think I was like nineteen 0:04:24.200 --> 0:04:28.000 years old, maybe I was twenty. So I lost both 0:04:28.040 --> 0:04:31.760 my legs when I was nineteen from meningitis. I had 0:04:31.760 --> 0:04:33.480 no idea what my life was going to be like. 0:04:33.600 --> 0:04:36.680 But I used to flip through magazines and I would think, 0:04:36.720 --> 0:04:39.560 to myself, I wish I could see somebody like me 0:04:39.800 --> 0:04:42.800 doing something really cool. Is there a way to make 0:04:42.839 --> 0:04:46.800 these legs look badass? Because they kind of were. They 0:04:46.800 --> 0:04:49.880 were carbon fiber and metal, and so I had that 0:04:50.000 --> 0:04:52.880 vision in my head and all of a sudden one day, 0:04:53.000 --> 0:04:57.400 my prostatist who makes my legs, he said, there's this 0:04:57.520 --> 0:05:00.160 casting call and we don't know who it's for. You 0:05:00.240 --> 0:05:02.120 might be interested in it, and it's for a model 0:05:02.160 --> 0:05:05.960 that has a prosthetic leg, and so I signed up 0:05:06.000 --> 0:05:08.160 for it. I ended up going out to La finding 0:05:08.200 --> 0:05:11.480 out that it was for Madonna for her music video. 0:05:11.560 --> 0:05:15.520 It was called American Life, and I ended up going 0:05:15.560 --> 0:05:18.320 to this casting call. I got it. I ended up 0:05:18.400 --> 0:05:21.360 showing up the day of the shoot, and I don't 0:05:21.360 --> 0:05:23.719 think that the stylist really knew what to do with me. 0:05:23.800 --> 0:05:25.919 They ended up just kind of shuffling me and this 0:05:26.080 --> 0:05:28.880 line with other people. They put me in this long 0:05:29.040 --> 0:05:32.400 dress that covered my legs, and then they kind of 0:05:32.440 --> 0:05:35.760 pushed us out onto this runway where Madonna was sitting 0:05:35.800 --> 0:05:38.280 at the end of the runway and her music was playing, 0:05:38.760 --> 0:05:41.440 and each one of us had to walk down, turnaround, 0:05:41.560 --> 0:05:44.400 and walk back. And as I was walking down the 0:05:44.440 --> 0:05:47.080 runway and wearing this long dress, you couldn't see my legs. 0:05:47.120 --> 0:05:49.599 And I thought to myself, I know I'm here for 0:05:49.680 --> 0:05:52.359 my legs, you know, just because they make me unique, 0:05:52.680 --> 0:05:54.680 and so I better show them. And so I got 0:05:54.720 --> 0:05:57.120 to the end of the runway. I pulled up my 0:05:57.320 --> 0:06:00.000 dress in front of Madonna. I did this little dance 0:06:00.640 --> 0:06:03.640 and showed my legs, my metal legs, and then I 0:06:03.720 --> 0:06:07.840 turned around and I walked off and she ran backstage 0:06:07.920 --> 0:06:10.640 and she was like, oh my gosh, this is amazing. 0:06:10.680 --> 0:06:12.719 There's so much we can do with this. And she 0:06:12.839 --> 0:06:14.400 said to me, she goes, do you mind if I 0:06:14.520 --> 0:06:17.919 sex you up? And I was like, you're Madonna, you 0:06:17.920 --> 0:06:19.200 could do whatever you want to do. 0:06:19.560 --> 0:06:22.240 Yes. Also, she's an expert at sexing up. 0:06:22.600 --> 0:06:24.920 Oh totally. And you know, like I said, they didn't 0:06:24.920 --> 0:06:26.560 really know what to do with me. They put me 0:06:26.560 --> 0:06:28.560 in this long dress, they put braids in my hair. 0:06:28.839 --> 0:06:31.000 She took the braids out of my hair. She fleft 0:06:31.080 --> 0:06:33.679 my hair all up, so it was huge. She literally 0:06:33.720 --> 0:06:36.960 was like, take that dress off. She ended up grabbing 0:06:37.000 --> 0:06:40.200 these little boy shorts off of this one guy and 0:06:40.920 --> 0:06:44.320 just putting tape over my boobs and then putting like 0:06:44.400 --> 0:06:48.679 sparkles on me. I was immediately sexed up. And then 0:06:49.040 --> 0:06:51.400 she you know, turned on the music and I strutted 0:06:51.440 --> 0:06:54.040 down the runway and I did this whole thing, and 0:06:54.120 --> 0:06:57.600 she actually had me work with Jeremy Scott. He's a designer, 0:06:57.640 --> 0:07:01.600 but also he was helping us walk the runway really confidently, 0:07:01.680 --> 0:07:04.120 and it was so amazing. I think that was probably 0:07:04.120 --> 0:07:08.240 the first time that I really thought about the possibilities 0:07:08.279 --> 0:07:11.400 with these legs instead of looking at my legs like 0:07:11.480 --> 0:07:14.720 this is something that's going to slow me down. From 0:07:14.720 --> 0:07:17.480 that point forward, I thought, what can I do with these? 0:07:17.800 --> 0:07:20.679 You know, how can I use these in a way 0:07:20.840 --> 0:07:24.080 that instead of holding me back, maybe they can actually 0:07:24.520 --> 0:07:27.400 propel me forward if I lean into them. If that 0:07:27.440 --> 0:07:28.040 makes sense. 0:07:28.280 --> 0:07:30.600 It makes so much sense. And you know, as I've 0:07:30.920 --> 0:07:34.200 listened to your interviews over the years, that word possibility 0:07:34.480 --> 0:07:38.040 stands out to me so much. You of course have 0:07:38.400 --> 0:07:41.320 this major moment of tragedy early on in your life, 0:07:41.360 --> 0:07:46.400 but you've also had these miraculous, one of a kind, 0:07:46.840 --> 0:07:49.800 very unique moments. You were in talks for a major 0:07:50.040 --> 0:07:54.120 Hollywood franchise called the Kingsman sequel. You were a finalist 0:07:54.200 --> 0:07:56.680 on Dancing with the Stars. You became a three time 0:07:56.720 --> 0:08:00.680 Paralympic medalist. Like your life took on this scale in 0:08:00.800 --> 0:08:04.640 shape that I'm wondering if young Amy could have ever imagined. 0:08:05.200 --> 0:08:09.119 Young Amy could have never imagined even before I lost 0:08:09.120 --> 0:08:12.080 my legs, you know where I would go or what 0:08:12.680 --> 0:08:16.600 I would be capable of doing, especially after I lost 0:08:16.640 --> 0:08:19.559 my legs that nineteen so I got sick from something 0:08:19.600 --> 0:08:23.040 called bacterial meningitis. I fought for my life in the hospital. 0:08:23.520 --> 0:08:27.080 I lost my legs, my kidneys, my spleen, and the 0:08:27.120 --> 0:08:30.640 hearing in my left ear overnight, all at once. My 0:08:30.680 --> 0:08:34.000 life completely changed. So I had no idea what my 0:08:34.000 --> 0:08:36.560 life was going to be like. I couldn't even visualize, 0:08:36.600 --> 0:08:38.480 you know, what I would do in my future. I 0:08:38.480 --> 0:08:41.160 had never even seen somebody who had two prosthetic legs, 0:08:41.160 --> 0:08:44.080 so I didn't really even know what the possibilities were 0:08:44.280 --> 0:08:47.880 at that time. But what I did know was that 0:08:48.559 --> 0:08:51.680 I was still me, and I still had my dreams 0:08:51.800 --> 0:08:55.560 and my goals, and I wanted to travel the world, 0:08:55.720 --> 0:08:58.600 and I wanted to live a life of adventure, and 0:08:58.679 --> 0:09:02.240 I wanted to have worries to tell and that still 0:09:02.400 --> 0:09:05.080 lived inside of me. And so I would lay in 0:09:05.080 --> 0:09:08.360 my hospital bed and visualize what did I want for 0:09:08.440 --> 0:09:10.360 my future? You know, I didn't know if I'd be 0:09:10.400 --> 0:09:13.079 able to snowboard again on prosthetic legs. I didn't know 0:09:13.320 --> 0:09:15.839 if someday I'd make it to the Paralympic Games, because 0:09:15.840 --> 0:09:18.840 snowboarding wasn't even in the Paralympic Games. At that point, 0:09:19.080 --> 0:09:20.920 of course, I didn't know if I would do something 0:09:20.960 --> 0:09:22.880 like dancing with the Stars or any of that stuff. 0:09:23.120 --> 0:09:25.440 It wasn't a clear vision. But what I did know 0:09:25.679 --> 0:09:30.080 is that I felt inside that I deserved to live 0:09:30.160 --> 0:09:33.520 my best life no matter what, and that I wanted 0:09:33.520 --> 0:09:35.960 to define what my life was going to be like. 0:09:36.040 --> 0:09:39.360 I didn't want others to define my life because I 0:09:39.440 --> 0:09:42.280 lost my legs. I didn't want to be defined by 0:09:42.640 --> 0:09:46.960 a disability and what people typically think about being disabled. 0:09:47.600 --> 0:09:50.680 I wanted to define my own life and that really 0:09:50.760 --> 0:09:53.920 took me on this journey of figuring out what the 0:09:53.960 --> 0:09:56.440 possibilities were, and it ended up taking me further than 0:09:56.480 --> 0:09:57.560 I ever could have imagined. 0:09:57.840 --> 0:10:02.400 So, before you lost your legs, you were working as 0:10:02.559 --> 0:10:06.160 a massage therapist, and I've heard you say that this 0:10:06.520 --> 0:10:09.280 was your dream job. First of all, I find that 0:10:09.360 --> 0:10:12.880 amazing because I've actually never heard somebody say that. I 0:10:12.920 --> 0:10:17.439 think massage therapists are very special, great ones are very special, 0:10:17.480 --> 0:10:20.000 but I've never heard anybody call it their dream job. 0:10:20.480 --> 0:10:22.160 Why was that the dream? Back then? 0:10:22.679 --> 0:10:26.480 It was my dream because I wanted to travel the world. 0:10:27.240 --> 0:10:30.800 I loved helping other people. I had this job that 0:10:30.880 --> 0:10:34.040 could travel with me. All I needed were my hands 0:10:34.040 --> 0:10:36.760 and my massage table by my side. I didn't need 0:10:36.840 --> 0:10:40.400 anything else. I could live anywhere. I was helping to 0:10:40.440 --> 0:10:43.880 heal people. It felt so good. People would come and 0:10:43.920 --> 0:10:47.720 stressed out, they would leave feeling so much better. And 0:10:47.760 --> 0:10:50.960 I just remember feeling that so fulfilled, knowing that I 0:10:50.960 --> 0:10:53.520 could help somebody with their day, knowing that I could 0:10:53.520 --> 0:10:57.240 help somebody feel better about whatever it was they were 0:10:57.240 --> 0:10:59.600 going through. Sometimes they had vent on the table and 0:10:59.720 --> 0:11:02.319 sometimes they wouldn't, but you knew that you were helping them. 0:11:02.320 --> 0:11:04.680 And so I think that's when I found out that 0:11:04.800 --> 0:11:08.360 I liked connecting with other people. I liked helping people 0:11:08.520 --> 0:11:13.000 feel better about themselves. And you know, if anything is 0:11:13.040 --> 0:11:17.000 stayed the same from younger Amy to now older Amy, 0:11:17.280 --> 0:11:21.280 I'd say it's probably that thread of wanting to help 0:11:21.320 --> 0:11:25.880 other people and help other people feel good about themselves 0:11:25.960 --> 0:11:28.920 and their life. I loved that about massage, but also 0:11:28.960 --> 0:11:31.239 the fact that I could travel and I could snowboard 0:11:31.320 --> 0:11:33.560 and have this job that would travel with me. It 0:11:33.600 --> 0:11:34.840 was really fulfilling. 0:11:35.120 --> 0:11:37.600 Well, it's not lost on me that, like I know, 0:11:37.720 --> 0:11:41.320 massage is a mind, body, spirit experience, but you're touching 0:11:41.400 --> 0:11:44.880 people physically, and now you're a renowned speaker, you just 0:11:44.880 --> 0:11:47.440 have a new book out, Like, you're touching people emotionally, 0:11:48.040 --> 0:11:50.720 and it does feel connected to that same purpose, that 0:11:50.800 --> 0:11:51.720 same thread. 0:11:51.760 --> 0:11:54.520 I think. So I get asked quite a bit if 0:11:54.520 --> 0:11:56.240 I was the same when I was younger as I 0:11:56.240 --> 0:11:58.319 am now, Like did I know when I was younger 0:11:58.320 --> 0:12:00.280 that I would be so strong or that I would 0:12:00.280 --> 0:12:02.800 be so resilient? And to be honest, there's a lot 0:12:02.840 --> 0:12:05.160 of things that I am now that I didn't know 0:12:05.240 --> 0:12:07.800 I was then. Like, I'm not sure if that resilience 0:12:07.840 --> 0:12:10.280 and that strength was just built or if it was 0:12:10.440 --> 0:12:13.640 inside of me all along, Because when I was younger, 0:12:13.800 --> 0:12:17.199 I think people, especially my family, thought I was emotional. 0:12:17.320 --> 0:12:19.440 I wouldn't be able to handle what I was going 0:12:19.480 --> 0:12:21.440 through when I lost my legs, and I ended up 0:12:21.480 --> 0:12:24.520 finding this inner strength that got me through it. I mean, 0:12:24.559 --> 0:12:27.160 I've always been really emotional, and I think that's probably 0:12:27.160 --> 0:12:29.400 what connects me to other people as well. You know, 0:12:29.440 --> 0:12:32.720 I could cry at a sunset. I'm really compassionate. I'm 0:12:32.760 --> 0:12:36.240 really empathetic towards others, and I think that sometimes that 0:12:36.320 --> 0:12:39.520 can be looked at as weakness, when really I've found 0:12:39.559 --> 0:12:43.040 over time it's become a strength, especially being on stage 0:12:43.040 --> 0:12:46.280 now and speaking and being able to connect with other people. 0:12:46.640 --> 0:12:49.640 So there's certain things that I do think are different 0:12:49.679 --> 0:12:52.840 from younger Amy to older Amy, but there's certain threads 0:12:53.400 --> 0:12:55.360 that have stayed the same. And I think one of 0:12:55.360 --> 0:12:58.920 those threads is the fact that I enjoy connecting with 0:12:59.000 --> 0:13:01.959 other people. I want other people to feel good about 0:13:02.000 --> 0:13:05.480 their lives, no matter what challenges they're faced with. I 0:13:05.480 --> 0:13:09.240 think we all have the ability to live a great life. 0:13:09.280 --> 0:13:12.439 It's not trying to overcome our circumstances so we can 0:13:12.480 --> 0:13:14.480 live a great life. I think it's living a great 0:13:14.520 --> 0:13:19.560 life within our circumstances and that's okay. And not only 0:13:19.600 --> 0:13:21.800 is that okay, if you can do that, if you 0:13:21.800 --> 0:13:24.520 can really lean into who you are, what you have, 0:13:24.679 --> 0:13:28.280 you can live an incredible life, much bigger than you 0:13:28.320 --> 0:13:31.400 ever could have imagined. And so that thread of just 0:13:31.520 --> 0:13:35.200 wanting people to know that and feel good, I think 0:13:35.280 --> 0:13:38.440 that carried through from being a massage therapist to now 0:13:38.480 --> 0:13:41.840 standing on stage speaking, to writing a book or you know, 0:13:41.920 --> 0:13:43.719 anything else that I find myself in. 0:13:44.120 --> 0:13:46.360 My dad was a dentist when I was growing up, 0:13:46.760 --> 0:13:49.520 and obviously like to go to dental school. You're very 0:13:49.559 --> 0:13:53.120 science minded, and he doesn't believe in anything, like, he 0:13:53.160 --> 0:13:57.440 doesn't believe in ghosts, he doesn't believe in spirituality, he 0:13:57.480 --> 0:14:00.560 doesn't believe in the afterlife like he believes enough except 0:14:00.559 --> 0:14:04.880 for science. And he has this one story that he 0:14:05.000 --> 0:14:07.800 can't make sense of, which I'm going to give a 0:14:07.920 --> 0:14:11.199 very abridged version. But basically, he had this recurring nightmare 0:14:11.240 --> 0:14:14.600 growing up. And when I say recurring, he had it 0:14:14.679 --> 0:14:16.720 multiple times a year, and as he got older, he 0:14:16.760 --> 0:14:20.120 had it less and less. And when he graduated from 0:14:20.200 --> 0:14:23.960 dental school, the nightmare that he had it lived out 0:14:24.040 --> 0:14:26.800 in real time. And because he had that nightmare, it 0:14:26.880 --> 0:14:28.960 saved his life because he knew what was going to happen. 0:14:29.320 --> 0:14:32.680 And it's a story I hold on too, because I 0:14:32.720 --> 0:14:35.080 grew up with him as my father, and so I 0:14:35.160 --> 0:14:36.760 was like, I don't know what I believe in. And 0:14:36.800 --> 0:14:40.400 when I moved to LA I became a lot more spiritual, 0:14:40.440 --> 0:14:43.720 a lot more connected, I would say, And you have 0:14:43.840 --> 0:14:47.320 this story that I have held on to for years. 0:14:47.560 --> 0:14:50.800 It gives me chills every time I hear you share it. 0:14:51.320 --> 0:14:53.760 If you're willing to share it with us today. I 0:14:53.760 --> 0:14:55.920 would love to hear it from you first person. But 0:14:56.080 --> 0:14:59.800 you were a massage therapist and this one client came 0:14:59.840 --> 0:15:03.200 in unexpectedly. Will you tell us what happened after that? 0:15:03.640 --> 0:15:07.400 Yes? And by the way, I love your questions, because again, 0:15:07.440 --> 0:15:09.720 these are stories I don't get to tell that much. 0:15:09.800 --> 0:15:14.600 And that was a very profound moment for me. I 0:15:14.640 --> 0:15:18.440 was a massage therapist. I was working a full shift 0:15:18.560 --> 0:15:21.320 at the Spa Canyon ranch in Las Vegas, and I 0:15:21.440 --> 0:15:26.120 was walking out the door actually, and my manager came 0:15:26.200 --> 0:15:28.720 and got me. I think I was already at the garage, 0:15:28.840 --> 0:15:31.160 like by my car, and he came and got me, 0:15:31.600 --> 0:15:33.680 and he said, oh my gosh, Amy, there's a client 0:15:33.760 --> 0:15:36.240 that we forgot about. It's just sitting in the waiting room. 0:15:36.320 --> 0:15:38.280 Is there any way you can stay back and do 0:15:38.320 --> 0:15:41.000 a massage? And I said sure, and so I ran 0:15:41.120 --> 0:15:43.360 back in there. I didn't even have my massage rooms 0:15:43.360 --> 0:15:46.440 set up because there weren't any massage rooms available. I 0:15:46.520 --> 0:15:48.880 ended up setting him up in this wet room, just 0:15:48.920 --> 0:15:52.680 this random room, and I went into the waiting room, 0:15:52.760 --> 0:15:55.280 I got him, I brought him in. He was this 0:15:55.800 --> 0:15:59.600 older man. He had blue eyes, and I laid him 0:15:59.600 --> 0:16:02.560 down on the table, and what was so interesting is 0:16:02.560 --> 0:16:05.120 as soon as I put my hands on his back, 0:16:05.680 --> 0:16:09.440 we were just connected. We just had I don't know 0:16:09.480 --> 0:16:12.040 what it was. You just feel this energy exchange as 0:16:12.040 --> 0:16:14.880 a massage therapist, and you know, and somebody's just right 0:16:14.920 --> 0:16:16.800 there with you, and you can be right there with them, 0:16:16.800 --> 0:16:19.280 you can feel it. And so the minute I started 0:16:19.280 --> 0:16:23.080 to massage him, we got into this conversation. And one 0:16:23.120 --> 0:16:26.320 of the first things that he asked was he said, 0:16:26.600 --> 0:16:28.320 I'm going to ask you a question, and I don't 0:16:28.320 --> 0:16:31.240 want you to be scared of it, but have you 0:16:31.360 --> 0:16:35.800 crossed over to the other side? And I said, no, 0:16:36.320 --> 0:16:39.200 I haven't. But I knew exactly what he was talking about, 0:16:39.200 --> 0:16:42.160 because I had this feeling that had been building up 0:16:42.160 --> 0:16:45.040 in me for years that something was going to happen 0:16:45.080 --> 0:16:47.040 in my life. And I didn't know if it was 0:16:47.120 --> 0:16:49.480 good or bad. I just felt it. I had it 0:16:49.520 --> 0:16:53.000 written in my journal even that something's going to happen 0:16:53.040 --> 0:16:54.880 and I don't know what it is. It was almost 0:16:54.920 --> 0:16:58.000 like this anticipation that was something was about to come. 0:16:58.680 --> 0:17:01.480 And so when he said have you crossed over? I 0:17:01.640 --> 0:17:04.680 just assumed that's what he was talking about and I said, no, 0:17:04.760 --> 0:17:07.920 but I feel like something's going to happen. And he said, 0:17:08.080 --> 0:17:12.119 when it does happen, don't be scared. He then told 0:17:12.119 --> 0:17:14.840 me his story, which was he fell down a well 0:17:14.880 --> 0:17:18.919 when he was a kid. He almost died, and he 0:17:19.119 --> 0:17:21.800 crossed over. He had a near death experience and he 0:17:21.840 --> 0:17:24.600 came back and when he came back, his life was 0:17:24.640 --> 0:17:28.480 completely different. And he said, when you cross over, Amy, 0:17:28.520 --> 0:17:31.399 your life is going to be completely different. But don't 0:17:31.400 --> 0:17:34.280 be scared. This is how you figure out the depths 0:17:34.320 --> 0:17:37.560 of life. This is how you experience the depths of life. 0:17:37.680 --> 0:17:42.200 And I walked away from that massage in tears, feeling 0:17:42.280 --> 0:17:44.439 like this guy just kind of spoke to my soul, 0:17:45.040 --> 0:17:48.199 but not knowing what was going to happen. Obviously, I 0:17:48.240 --> 0:17:51.280 went home. I wrote that in my journal, that experience, 0:17:52.080 --> 0:17:55.040 and I think it was just a couple weeks later. 0:17:55.080 --> 0:17:57.200 It was maybe three weeks later that I was laying 0:17:57.280 --> 0:18:00.760 on the hospital bed in the emergency room. The doctors 0:18:00.760 --> 0:18:02.760 and nurses were saying I had less than a two 0:18:02.760 --> 0:18:06.040 percent chance of living. I was in cardiac arrest, I 0:18:06.119 --> 0:18:09.399 was in full kidney failure, and I was fighting for 0:18:09.520 --> 0:18:12.800 my life every second of my life, and I remember 0:18:13.080 --> 0:18:17.280 this conversation with the guy and I thought, Amy, he said, 0:18:17.320 --> 0:18:20.560 don't be scared when you cross over, don't be scared, 0:18:20.920 --> 0:18:23.439 and so in that moment it makes me emotional. But 0:18:23.720 --> 0:18:25.560 in that moment, I took a deep breath and I 0:18:25.640 --> 0:18:27.720 just thought, Okay, this is what he is talking about. 0:18:27.840 --> 0:18:31.119 Everything's going to be okay, and this is what was 0:18:31.119 --> 0:18:34.959 supposed to happen. And that moment was profound because I 0:18:35.040 --> 0:18:37.879 don't know who he was, right, he was like a messenger. 0:18:37.920 --> 0:18:39.800 Did he know he was a messenger. I don't know. 0:18:40.440 --> 0:18:42.320 I don't know if he knew that he was there 0:18:42.359 --> 0:18:45.480 to deliver this message or if he just had experienced 0:18:45.520 --> 0:18:47.760 something in his own life and he just felt that 0:18:48.040 --> 0:18:51.800 I would experience the same. I never was in touch 0:18:51.800 --> 0:18:53.879 with him again, you know, its very much so a 0:18:53.960 --> 0:18:57.520 premonition of what was to come. And he also said, 0:18:57.880 --> 0:19:00.760 your life is going to be amazing. You are going 0:19:00.840 --> 0:19:04.359 to do amazing things. And I remember thinking about that 0:19:04.680 --> 0:19:08.040 on my deathbed. This guy said I was going to 0:19:08.119 --> 0:19:11.840 do amazing things, and I think that just wired my 0:19:12.119 --> 0:19:16.880 brain to believe that, and I took that and ran 0:19:16.960 --> 0:19:17.320 with it. 0:19:17.480 --> 0:19:20.080 I'm like out of breath hearing you tell that story 0:19:20.560 --> 0:19:23.560 all these years later, how do you make sense of it? 0:19:23.920 --> 0:19:27.800 You know, there's times that I think, maybe we're angels 0:19:27.840 --> 0:19:30.400 to each other and we don't even know it. Maybe 0:19:30.440 --> 0:19:34.320 he came in not realizing how he was going to 0:19:34.359 --> 0:19:37.240 impact my life, truly that three weeks later I'd be 0:19:37.280 --> 0:19:39.679 fighting for my life and that his words would save me. 0:19:40.080 --> 0:19:42.120 And then there's other times that I think, no, there's 0:19:42.160 --> 0:19:44.840 so many magical things that we can't explain. And the 0:19:44.920 --> 0:19:49.879 more connected you are to I think the present moment, 0:19:50.080 --> 0:19:53.239 like when you can just be present. And when I 0:19:53.280 --> 0:19:56.919 was a massage therapist, I was so present. We didn't 0:19:56.920 --> 0:19:59.359 have our phones, we weren't caught up in different things. 0:19:59.400 --> 0:20:02.320 We were just in the moment with each other. That's 0:20:02.320 --> 0:20:05.560 what my every day was. And I think by being 0:20:05.720 --> 0:20:10.160 present you see the magic of life. That's when serendipitous 0:20:10.200 --> 0:20:13.240 moments happen. That's when you meet somebody that crossed your 0:20:13.280 --> 0:20:16.560 path at the right time, or somebody gave some premonition 0:20:16.680 --> 0:20:19.800 that happened, or somebody helped you at a time that 0:20:19.880 --> 0:20:22.879 you needed it. I don't know if this guy was 0:20:22.920 --> 0:20:27.080 truly an angel or if he was just another human 0:20:27.119 --> 0:20:29.520 that just happened across my path at the same time, 0:20:29.560 --> 0:20:33.359 and I paid attention. I think that's the beauty of life. 0:20:33.440 --> 0:20:36.600 I think that's how if you can walk around and 0:20:36.680 --> 0:20:40.359 take a breath and be present, that's when you notice 0:20:40.480 --> 0:20:44.040 all these amazing little things that connect. That's when you 0:20:44.160 --> 0:20:47.359 notice these special little moments and the little miracles that 0:20:47.440 --> 0:20:50.840 happen every day, and I choose to believe that they 0:20:50.840 --> 0:20:54.120 are something more than what we can see. I don't 0:20:54.240 --> 0:20:56.960 like to make sense of every single thing. I actually 0:20:57.080 --> 0:20:59.800 like the magic and the unknown, and I kind of 0:20:59.880 --> 0:21:02.600 like to keep it there a little bit. It feels special, 0:21:02.920 --> 0:21:04.880 you know, and that's a choice. You can dig into it. 0:21:04.960 --> 0:21:08.080 I have a very kind of mechanical brain and scientific brain. 0:21:08.119 --> 0:21:10.400 I like to dig in and make sense of everything, 0:21:11.080 --> 0:21:13.679 but I also like to hold certain things to just 0:21:13.760 --> 0:21:16.760