Speaker 1: I invited you hear I thought, I made myself perfectly clear,
Speaker 1: But you're a guess to my home. You gotta come
Speaker 1: to me empty, And I said, no guests, your presences
Speaker 1: presence enough. I already had too much stuff, So how
Speaker 1: did you dare to surbey mean?
Speaker 2: I am not going to start the podcast until you
Speaker 2: hear the reminder that we are having a live I said,
Speaker 2: no gifts, the very first one at Dynasty type or
Speaker 2: June twenty sixth at seven thirty pm. What else do
Speaker 2: you need to know Los Angeles? I may have already
Speaker 2: said that my mind is going. If you can't be
Speaker 2: in Los Angeles that night, or if you just won't
Speaker 2: be here, or you're in another state or you know, elsewhere,
Speaker 2: and I just don't mean enough to you to travel,
Speaker 2: you can buy the live stream that is also at
Speaker 2: dynastytypewriter dot com, and you can watch it live online
Speaker 2: as everything unfolds, or as far as I know, for
Speaker 2: seven days after you can access the live stream. So
Speaker 2: if you're I don't know, at a rave that Wednesday night,
Speaker 2: you can watch the show the next day. It's going
Speaker 2: to be a spectacle. This thing is going to be,
Speaker 2: you know, a lot of surprises, a lot of learning,
Speaker 2: and a lot of care. So I expect you to
Speaker 2: be there.
Speaker 1: You have.
Speaker 2: We've given you every possible way to watch this thing.
Speaker 2: Be there. Now, let's have a podcast. Welcome to, I
Speaker 2: said no gifts. I'm Bridger Wineger. We are in the backyard.
Speaker 2: What's happening. It's garbage day. The truck has been by
Speaker 2: so far for two cans. We still have one can
Speaker 2: left to be picked up. I am just out of
Speaker 2: touch with the person who's in charge of doing my taxes.
Speaker 2: He will not answer my calls. His assistant won't answer
Speaker 2: my calls. Bruce, Melissa, please, I'm I'm getting notices. I
Speaker 2: need to get in touch with these people. And now
Speaker 2: I feel like I'm in danger and that's really taking
Speaker 2: a lot of my mental energy. So Bruce, Melissa, reach out.
Speaker 2: Let's get into the podcast. I adore, I adore. Today's
Speaker 2: guest it's Johnny Pemberton.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, I adore be here, Johnny.
Speaker 2: Welcome to.
Speaker 3: I said no gifts a lot. What would you call
Speaker 3: this area here?
Speaker 2: That's a great question. It's kind of a patio.
Speaker 3: Right, but I feel like it's beyond patio.
Speaker 2: I would say it's beneath patt. I feel like a
Speaker 2: patio is kind of its own thing where you look
Speaker 2: at it and say, that's a patio.
Speaker 3: Right, what is a terrorists? Terrorists has to overlook, right.
Speaker 2: Terrorists has to overlook something This kind of overlooks about
Speaker 2: seven inches of concrete.
Speaker 3: Right, like sort of a potential skate ramp of sorts.
Speaker 2: Oh, that's not a bad idea.
Speaker 3: Have some teens up here tearing start filming skate video?
Speaker 2: My god, that's my new.
Speaker 3: Life crisis is skate video filmer.
Speaker 2: I've become a director of skate videos.
Speaker 3: Do you skate? I do not know. I feel like
Speaker 3: you have a skating energy. I mean I appreciate that.
Speaker 3: That's very nice. Uh, that's that's a huge compliment, an
Speaker 3: attempt like, oh yeah, when I was much younger, I
Speaker 3: did and I tried to do it, but I was
Speaker 3: never that good at it. I did. I like the
Speaker 3: whole idea of it, like to close a lot, like
Speaker 3: the culture. The culture is very nice. Culture's cool, it's
Speaker 3: very hip. It's very like, you know, you're sexy, but
Speaker 3: you're disheveled, right.
Speaker 2: You don't care?
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I feel like most skaters I knew growing up were
Speaker 2: nice people.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think so. I think it's like everything where
Speaker 3: it can be. There's there's assholes in the bunch, for sure,
Speaker 3: but I guess it's more like their assholes because they're
Speaker 3: so cool, right, You're just so damn cool. They can
Speaker 3: be dismissive.
Speaker 2: I'm trying to think of other like extreme sports that
Speaker 2: have that are more likely to have assholes in the group.
Speaker 2: Surfing surfing interesting, that's a big thing. Actually, do you
Speaker 2: know a lot of assholes surfers.
Speaker 3: I've heard stories from friends who surf how like it's
Speaker 3: very it's a real it's very clubby, very clicky here,
Speaker 3: it's other California to where if you go to certain spots,
Speaker 3: they'll be like, what the fuck are you doing here?
Speaker 2: Bro?
Speaker 3: Get the fuck off my wave.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that is not the energy I would expect from
Speaker 2: surfing exactly.
Speaker 3: That's why it's so cool. That's why it's so scary,
Speaker 3: because it's like I thought everyone was like chilling with
Speaker 3: the ocean, but they are. They are territorial as hell.
Speaker 2: What are they territorial?
Speaker 4: Like?
Speaker 2: They just don't want you on their waves.
Speaker 3: Yeah, because there's not that you'd be surprised there's actually
Speaker 3: not that many great breaks out there.
Speaker 2: Oh interesting, you're yourself now.
Speaker 3: Honestly, bro, I mean I would stick to skating because
Speaker 3: there's not a lot of kill. There's not a lot
Speaker 3: a killer breaks out there. Okay, for real, it's all
Speaker 3: goddamn beach break out here, like Kurt said, right right kill?
Speaker 2: Oh of course, of course have you ever served?
Speaker 3: No? No, not a bodysurfing a couple of times, like
Speaker 3: in North Carolina, but not like who is body surfing for?
Speaker 3: I think it's for the vacationer.
Speaker 2: Right, like the dad with kids, like let's get out
Speaker 2: and have a little fun.
Speaker 3: Or the dad who doesn't have doesn't want to buy
Speaker 3: their kid a boogie board. What's a boogie board? Lookyboard
Speaker 3: is like a like a board that you lay on
Speaker 3: your chest with. It's sort of like surfing, but you
Speaker 3: have you're writing it like a chest down on a
Speaker 3: on a sort of a half size of a surfboard,
Speaker 3: a little wider, usually made a foam.
Speaker 2: Okay, and wait, what was the other board we were
Speaker 2: just talking about surfing, surfboard and skateboard. There was between
Speaker 2: boogie board and surfboard. There was a board that I've
Speaker 2: already forgotten the name of because we've talked about board.
Speaker 3: Some say body surfing. Body surfing that's just literally your body.
Speaker 3: Oh did you know that?
Speaker 2: No, I was imagining a boogie board.
Speaker 3: No, bodysurfing is you just you can literally surf with
Speaker 3: your body if you get like these small waves. You know,
Speaker 3: they're small, like you know, I don't know what size
Speaker 3: they are, but they're not intimidating. But if you do
Speaker 3: it right, you can kind of surf all using your
Speaker 3: body as a board. So you're just kind of falling
Speaker 3: down sort of, but you can ride the wave being
Speaker 3: carried by the wave. Yeah, it works maybe a tenth
Speaker 3: of time, but when it does, it's very exhilarating because
Speaker 3: you're like, wow, I just got carried by this.
Speaker 2: Water, right, That to me just feels like I'm out
Speaker 2: of control.
Speaker 3: Well, I mean that's what it's all about.
Speaker 1: Bro.
Speaker 3: Let go see.
Speaker 2: When I was imagining like a tourist or whatever, is
Speaker 2: imagining them stopping at like a local grocery store and
Speaker 2: buying a boogie board, that was like, yeah, fourteen dollars
Speaker 2: and then you kind of just have it push you
Speaker 2: on to the shore.
Speaker 3: I think that's the idea because you want to get
Speaker 3: some merch. Okay, you always want to have some merch
Speaker 3: to buy in your location. I'm a merch guy. I
Speaker 3: will buy for a merch guy. I fucking love merch.
Speaker 2: You're currently wearing homemade merch, and I got this merch.
Speaker 3: I like, yes, my first white hat of actually liked.
Speaker 3: This is a gift. What does it say in theater? Okay,
Speaker 3: they did did a show there and they gave me
Speaker 3: some merch.
Speaker 2: I'm like, you know a good looking merch.
Speaker 3: It's a golf it's I guess it's it's a hat.
Speaker 3: It's a golf hat if you wear golfing.
Speaker 2: Right, No, it's I think that's the shape of a
Speaker 2: golf hat.
Speaker 3: Yeah. Also, white is always such a golf color.
Speaker 2: It's a real golf color. It's the color of like
Speaker 2: it's pristine. You're doing something kind of nice. You're not
Speaker 2: gonna get any mess on it, right, But you're wearing
Speaker 2: a thin Lizzie shirt that you've made.
Speaker 3: Right. I made this years ago. I don't know why
Speaker 3: were this old? This whole thing, this is really for me.
Speaker 3: This is this whole thing.
Speaker 2: How old is it?
Speaker 3: It's probably about, oh, maybe almost eight or nine years old.
Speaker 2: Did you trace that or is that a hand car
Speaker 2: sort of.
Speaker 3: It's sort of a variation on their actual logo that
Speaker 3: I made. I think I made it better because their
Speaker 3: logo like currently, like the existing logo is different than this.
Speaker 3: It's more like the L and the L and the
Speaker 3: Y are different shape really, So I just made it
Speaker 3: longer because I.
Speaker 2: Want to see, because it to me just looks like
Speaker 2: the thin Lizzie logo. It's that's really.
Speaker 3: Close, but it's a little different because I made the
Speaker 3: ending of the Y and the L longer, and I
Speaker 3: think I made the H longer. I don't think it
Speaker 3: looks better that.
Speaker 2: Okay, I'm looking on a Lisa is holding it up.
Speaker 2: I'm going to look at it for a minute and
Speaker 2: then look over.
Speaker 3: Yeah, see this doesn't match up over here. I thought
Speaker 3: that looked interesting.
Speaker 2: Just he's not as long, right, So the casual observer
Speaker 2: just thinks it's official.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean it's it's basically official, but it's it's
Speaker 3: boot leg. It's slightly bootleg. Yeah, it's definitely boutleg.
Speaker 2: It's certainly I like a bootleg concert te I do too.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I like anything bootleg pretty much.
Speaker 2: You make, don't you sell T shirts?
Speaker 3: I do? Yeah, I don't do it as much right now,
Speaker 3: but I have. It's like a thing I I don't know,
Speaker 3: I just like like to make. It all started because
Speaker 3: I was making sure it's for myself and people were like,
Speaker 3: where'd you get that? And like I made it? And
Speaker 3: so because I started doing a hand drawn So the
Speaker 3: first one I did was a it was the Pentagonial logo,
Speaker 3: but it says Monsanto. And that was when I just
Speaker 3: made for myself. And then I started printing them and
Speaker 3: selling them.
Speaker 2: Are you screen printing?
Speaker 3: I do screenprint a bunch of them.
Speaker 2: Yeah, do you do you own like a Okay, go
Speaker 2: to a facility.
Speaker 3: I got a guy in Long Beach, Oh does it.
Speaker 3: And the screenprints, it's the thing though always people do
Speaker 3: these like digital prints, but they don't. They do not
Speaker 3: look as good like if you get a screenprint. It's
Speaker 3: so much. That's the that's the thing with merch is
Speaker 3: so much merches. It's just not very good. There's much
Speaker 3: I have, like a the colors have no weight to them,
Speaker 3: and it's just unfortunate because you have a cares design.
Speaker 2: But yeah, yeah, I think in high school we got
Speaker 2: to do a screenprint of design we could make and
Speaker 2: there's like a I mean, there's just more texture.
Speaker 3: So yeah, so it's very it's like a tactile. It's
Speaker 3: more like visceral kind of things. All these words.
Speaker 2: I made this shirt, but it's not screen printed, and
Speaker 2: as you can tell, it looks very cheap.
Speaker 3: It doesn't. It looks good though.
Speaker 2: It looks no no, no, no no.
Speaker 3: Yeah, because sometimes you sh just have to age a bit.
Speaker 3: No this.
Speaker 2: If this has been screen printed, this would have been dazzling.
Speaker 3: I guess you can see how the letters look digital.
Speaker 3: I wanted the letters to look digital, so that was
Speaker 3: on purpose, right.
Speaker 2: Okay, but you know, I think if it were screen printed,
Speaker 2: it would be a whole another bulking.
Speaker 3: It will, but it's one color, so we would be
Speaker 3: pretty cheap and easy to do. How much does that cost?
Speaker 3: It depends on the how may you do?
Speaker 2: Okay, that's always the problem.
Speaker 3: This is an off air conversation. This is not enough.
Speaker 2: A lot of listeners are looking to screen print a
Speaker 2: large amount of teas.
Speaker 3: When I say off air, I mean I don't know,
Speaker 3: you don't know.
Speaker 2: No whatever. I like, every probably eight months I'm like, oh,
Speaker 2: I want to screen printed shirt. Then you get online
Speaker 2: and it's like you have to order nine. Yeah, minimum
Speaker 2: twelve order And I'm not ordering myself twelve of the
Speaker 2: same T shirt to store them, storing them.
Speaker 3: And sizing too, because I when I will buy a
Speaker 3: bunch to sell, I try to figure out what sizes
Speaker 3: are people going to be wearing in this city or whatever,
Speaker 3: And I'm always wrong.
Speaker 2: Oh oh, I mean that's the age old problem. That's
Speaker 2: clearance racks tell that tale, bided They're small.
Speaker 3: Everyone thing is small as big, right.
Speaker 2: I feel like I if I go to the store
Speaker 2: and I want to buy something on sale, they it's
Speaker 2: always too big.
Speaker 3: Small things are rarely on the sale rack. That's true.
Speaker 3: I feel like.
Speaker 2: America does not care about the small man.
Speaker 3: No, definitely not unless you get like extra small, which
Speaker 3: you'll see or you'll see like basically it's like a
Speaker 3: children's side, like a large child size. We're talking my size.
Speaker 3: You can do a large child. I could. I'm probably
Speaker 3: a large child. I used to do it, but I
Speaker 3: think now I just can't handle the way it fits
Speaker 3: on me. It's like I don't have the confidence or
Speaker 3: the I want the comfort of a fitting, not like
Speaker 3: the not being crushed.
Speaker 2: Although I will say a large child's shirt is a
Speaker 2: different A large child's different shape of person than a
Speaker 2: small man.
Speaker 3: Sometimes it's better. It's like a boxier cut, much boxier.
Speaker 3: That's such a big thing too, is the cut of
Speaker 3: the shirt. Some shirts are just sort of like they
Speaker 3: don't look nice. They have like a weird I don't know.
Speaker 3: I'm a real snob with that stuff.
Speaker 2: Although I feel like we're kind of in a boxy
Speaker 2: shirt era. We are kind of people are liking a
Speaker 2: boxy shirt, and as a small person, I just don't
Speaker 2: feel like when I'm wearing a boxy shirt, it looks
Speaker 2: like I'm wearing my older brother's shirt.
Speaker 3: What if you have a smaller because if it's not
Speaker 3: too long, it would look.
Speaker 2: Nice and short boxy shirt.
Speaker 3: It's almost like a larger crop top and a.
Speaker 2: Larger crop top. I don't know if I could get
Speaker 2: into a crop.
Speaker 3: I don't know about that. I definitely can't do that.
Speaker 2: I mean, I think anyone can do a crop top
Speaker 2: if it seems like they did it on purpose. Yeah,
Speaker 2: if it seems like they're wearing a crop top by mistake,
Speaker 2: then people are wondering.
Speaker 3: I'm I'm just one hundred percent no, I cannot do
Speaker 3: a crop top. I will not wear that. I don't
Speaker 3: think anyone wants to. I just yeah, because it's like,
Speaker 3: if you don't feel like good in it, you know, right,
Speaker 3: and it's then I can't I can't do it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you just have to feel good in it. You
Speaker 2: have like these train conductor paints.
Speaker 3: I guess that's what they are. Yeah, these are They
Speaker 3: were sold to me as carpenter pants.
Speaker 2: Carpenter. No, these are better than carpenter paints.
Speaker 3: What they said they were an Italian carpenter, the Italian
Speaker 3: carpenter who found some train conductor.
Speaker 2: Yeah, oh no that no. I feel like this is
Speaker 2: like a conductor.
Speaker 3: And engineer, so I think it is. I don't know
Speaker 3: what engineers are wearing these days. I feel like we're
Speaker 3: all disappointed by modern trade outfits. I bet you used
Speaker 3: to be so colorful and specific, and now they're.
Speaker 2: Just everybody used to look like they were from the
Speaker 2: Richard Scary, illustratious, exactly, like they had their specific job.
Speaker 2: The chef had the hat, the train conductor was wearing
Speaker 2: these pants and a hat.
Speaker 3: And now chefs are like, oh, they're just on drugs,
Speaker 3: covered in tattoos, screaming, how do you know it's that
Speaker 3: they're smoking. Are they smoking? Do they have hand tattoos?
Speaker 3: It's a chef, and like, how do you know it's
Speaker 3: a trade? So how do you know it's a brick layer?
Speaker 3: Do they have tattoos? Are they did they go to prison?
Speaker 3: That's a that's a brick layer. The only sign of
Speaker 3: any trade. It's just tons of tattoos, like poorly done
Speaker 3: tattoos that were done in like the fit of like
Speaker 3: addiction recovery exactly.
Speaker 2: I feel like a train conductor at this point would
Speaker 2: probably wear an ill fitting polo.
Speaker 3: Yeah, like I'm once super stretched and they're kind of unwashed.
Speaker 2: Maybe do they even have a train conductor at this point?
Speaker 2: Or is it a robot?
Speaker 3: I mean it's gonna be a robot soon. I mean
Speaker 3: I think they're getting close to it.
Speaker 2: That thing is just on a track. No offense to
Speaker 2: the conductors, but yeah, that's.
Speaker 3: Probably the most offense that you can possibly say.
Speaker 4: I bet, like, how dear everyone keeps saying it's just
Speaker 4: on a track, But.
Speaker 3: We have to do so much.
Speaker 2: I guess they probably do have. I will hand it
Speaker 2: to conductors. They probably can do other things.
Speaker 3: I bet it's so difficult. It's probably a nightmare. Actually,
Speaker 3: it's all extremely stressed, so stressful. I've heard stories about
Speaker 3: conductors who have hit a person, you know, because you
Speaker 3: can't stop the train right and you know you're going
Speaker 3: to kill this person, and so you have to live
Speaker 3: with that. And that's like once you go back to work,
Speaker 3: you are just that is on your mind.
Speaker 2: Now you're just the murderer conductor. Yeah, when people get
Speaker 2: hit by trains when it's not on purpose, I just.
Speaker 3: I don't know. I don't know what to say about
Speaker 3: that anymore. You like, you think what to say about
Speaker 3: how they it just don't be there. You should know,
Speaker 3: you should know. It's just such a so nasty.
Speaker 2: I guess it's one of those things where it feels
Speaker 2: so obvious that it wouldn't happen, that it probably you
Speaker 2: take it for granted, and then.
Speaker 3: You get hit and then you're just you're gone. And
Speaker 3: then you're gone. You've been smashed by a train. I
Speaker 3: don't know.
Speaker 2: People are they play some funny games, play some funny game.
Speaker 3: Yeah, don't go on the tracks.
Speaker 2: What have you been up to?
Speaker 3: Oh, I don't know. I've been I was in Oklahoma
Speaker 3: for like a month. Oh, I was in Oklahoma's working
Speaker 3: on a pilot. Oh it was nice.
Speaker 2: Way Oklahoma kind of has a kind of a burgeoning
Speaker 2: arts scene.
Speaker 3: It does, actually very much, so, especially Tulsa. I was
Speaker 3: in Tulsa, Oklahoma.
Speaker 2: They're kind of like trying to lure people there.
Speaker 3: Right, definitely are. They're doing a great job. Okay, It's
Speaker 3: it's really fun there. It's for the size of the city,
Speaker 3: it is exceptionally interesting and fun and diverse and very much.
Speaker 3: I find that, like any kind of you know, a
Speaker 3: small place, a small town anywhere, especially in a place
Speaker 3: you know in the southern area, people are wanting to
Speaker 3: be like, hey, we're cool. Oh of course I want
Speaker 3: to let you know that. Hey, the stuff you've heard
Speaker 3: we I might sound like this, but look we do
Speaker 3: not lack that guy you think we lack.
Speaker 2: Okay, this is like I I think I know this
Speaker 2: experience very well totally.
Speaker 3: I mean, I flick Salt Lake. There's a lot of
Speaker 3: hipsters there. It's like.
Speaker 2: You really have to work to differentiate yourself from the
Speaker 2: prevailing culture.
Speaker 3: We know something about people who live in Utah as
Speaker 3: they like to work. It's like the Mormons took hipster
Speaker 3: down and they took like how can I make the
Speaker 3: whole idea of working hard put it into being hip
Speaker 3: because all the hipsters I know, all the hippus hipsters
Speaker 3: I know are from Utah, Is that true. I've met
Speaker 3: a bunch of them there. I'm like you, you are
Speaker 3: really going hard in this.
Speaker 2: That was part of the reason I needed to get out,
Speaker 2: because I didn't want to have to work that hard
Speaker 2: at being cool.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I just felt like a lot of effort. The tattoos
Speaker 2: you had to Mike do you had to be kind
Speaker 2: of a pristine cool person.
Speaker 3: I don't have that. It's like a certain style there.
Speaker 2: Right, because you don't you want to let people know
Speaker 2: I'm not part of this other thing. Yeah, I couldn't
Speaker 2: do it, so I got out. But now they have
Speaker 2: this giant music festival that's happening everybody loves. Yeah. Really,
Speaker 2: it's called it's named after a small venue I used
Speaker 2: to go to, actually called Kilby Court. I think it's
Speaker 2: called Kilby Block Party. It's like the music festival. Now, Wow,
Speaker 2: it's bizarre. I would have never had a million Niggers expected.
Speaker 3: That because the Mormons really into singing, aren't they.
Speaker 2: Isn't it a thing Mormons loved to sing. They love
Speaker 2: to play an instrument, right, they have obviously the famous tabernacchire.
Speaker 2: I can't sing, really, I'm not. I'm an ex Mormon.
Speaker 2: But a lot of Mormons love to sing. They love
Speaker 2: musical theater. There's a wholesomeness about it.
Speaker 3: I think, yeah, they're they're great singers too. It's like
Speaker 3: it's like a weird thing. It's like the Philippines, right
Speaker 3: with karaoke, which is kind of endemic.
Speaker 2: Right, It's just kind of there and everybody does it.
Speaker 3: Born to harmonize.
Speaker 2: Did you you're from the Midwest, Yeah, I grew up.
Speaker 2: There were there any Mormons around you?
Speaker 3: I don't think so. I didn't know about I really
Speaker 3: didn't understand it until much later I read Under the
Speaker 3: Manner of Heaven. Of course, my god, that's a wild idea.
Speaker 3: That's a wild that is crazy to me.
Speaker 2: Do you remember any the I mean, there are some
Speaker 2: really graphic details that we don't need to go over.
Speaker 2: But there's that thing about the dream mind. Do you
Speaker 2: remember this. The Mormons that have this mine, well, they're
Speaker 2: not Mormons, they're fundamentalists.
Speaker 3: Right, it's very different. But they have a.
Speaker 2: Mine in south of Salt Lake City, called the dream Mine,
Speaker 2: which is empty but that they think is going to
Speaker 2: eventually be filled with jewels and gold or something.
Speaker 3: I don't remember that part, but that's a tracks. I
Speaker 3: want to go there so bad.
Speaker 2: But I imagine they're the type of people that like
Speaker 2: patrol it with shotguns. Yeah, so I don't know that.
Speaker 2: I'm I guess I could be converted.
Speaker 3: Don't poke around what you're doing. What you're doing right here?
Speaker 2: Yeah, you end up getting chased by like a pickup.
Speaker 2: There's somebody in the back with a rifle or multiple pickups.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, attack and you have to have dinner
Speaker 3: with them? You have to have dinner?
Speaker 2: Is that before You've been down?
Speaker 3: And chase you down to invite you. If you refuse
Speaker 3: our hospitality, you will be dealt with force. Force will
Speaker 3: be dealt upon you if you refuse our our long
Speaker 3: descended dinner phone with a game night following, I sing
Speaker 3: along Game night to follow. You choose to quiplash for hours,
Speaker 3: It's gonna take six hours. We'll release you afterwards. But
Speaker 3: if you can't make the time for that, you can't
Speaker 3: make the time for your life.
Speaker 4: Uh.
Speaker 2: Can I ask your opinion on quiplash?
Speaker 3: I don't know that game like this thing? I hate it?
Speaker 3: Aren't they all the same? At some point? It's like
Speaker 3: balder dash or categorizing scattergories is trivia?
Speaker 2: Maybe, Okay, quiplashes.
Speaker 3: Kind of came up with the pandemic. I think, oh, right,
Speaker 3: is it the one on your phone?
Speaker 2: You're shohn your computer and your phone and you have
Speaker 2: to make like right, they're like funny prompts, and that's
Speaker 2: the problem for me. Yeah, where it's just agonizing and
Speaker 2: it's uh, I get pulled into this thing and I'm
Speaker 2: just in pain the entire game.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I always end up doing stuff where it's like, Okay,
Speaker 3: how can I make fun of this game in the
Speaker 3: process while still technically playing it, like say the worst
Speaker 3: thing or just say like something that is Yeah, I
Speaker 3: just always want I always want to make fun of
Speaker 3: the thing I'm doing as I'm doing it.
Speaker 2: Obviously, just have a problem with intimacy. You aren't able
Speaker 2: to be intimate with your game partners.
Speaker 3: That's probably it. There we go. Yeah, I think that's
Speaker 3: my problem, and just the game, the fact that they
Speaker 3: tell you what to do, or when people get rewarded
Speaker 3: for being funny who they are not funny? That's a
Speaker 3: good problem. Absolutely, so I just refuse to participate.
Speaker 2: But sometimes you show up at somebody's house and they
Speaker 2: announce that that's what they're doing.
Speaker 3: Oh nope, not me. I don't show up to many
Speaker 3: things that have those type of things going on.
Speaker 2: Are you a very social person?
Speaker 3: I don't know. I like to be, but I think
Speaker 3: in yeah, I guess so. I don't know. It's changed
Speaker 3: the years. I guess. I just like to socialize. I
Speaker 3: guess I'm not super social, but I like to with
Speaker 3: certain people. You're selective. Yeah, I have a lot of
Speaker 3: friends who I know from I went to college with,
Speaker 3: and it's and we have like such a shorthand, so
Speaker 3: we hang out a lot because it's you know, they
Speaker 3: don't work in the industry, so that's my favorite thing.
Speaker 3: If they work, and it's like a different, a wholly
Speaker 3: different thing, and so right, yeah, right, right, yeah.
Speaker 2: People from high school and college, when you get to
Speaker 2: talk to them compared to anybody else in your life,
Speaker 2: it's just so much more fun.
Speaker 3: Right.
Speaker 2: A friend just moved for that I've known since kindergarten.
Speaker 2: Anytime I talk to him, it's just like, oh, this
Speaker 2: is joy, this is pure joy. Because we just know
Speaker 2: every like for this. Yeah, we speak the same language
Speaker 2: exactly and we don't have to worry about all the
Speaker 2: other nonsense. Right, do you host parties do anything like that?
Speaker 3: I like to host outdoor parties. Outdoor I do like
Speaker 3: to do. I like to cook for people. Oh right, right,
Speaker 3: I really enjoy that. Are you at the grill? I was,
Speaker 3: sometimes we'll do a crawfish boil. Actually, yeah, is that
Speaker 3: something you grew up doing or a little bit. My
Speaker 3: mom was from Louisiana, so I grew up eating that
Speaker 3: was like my favorite food as a kid was food
Speaker 3: from New Orleans. And I remember the first time I
Speaker 3: went to a crawfish boil was like the first year
Speaker 3: I moved here. There was a friend of my one
Speaker 3: of my friends had a friend who lived in Venice
Speaker 3: at this little house in Venice and they he was
Speaker 3: in from Louisiana and he had a crawfish bowl and
Speaker 3: I went there. I was like, this is the most
Speaker 3: It's so fun. It's so much fun. And the taste
Speaker 3: is like this very unique taste you can't get otherwise,
Speaker 3: not just the crawfish themselves, but like you have the corn,
Speaker 3: the potatoes in there and all the other stuff. It's
Speaker 3: and a taste. It's like this unique blend of lemoni, pepper, vinegar.
Speaker 3: Oh it's so it's so fragrant too, because all the
Speaker 3: spices you put in there. It's just such a fun
Speaker 3: I don't know something about it. It's like a fun
Speaker 3: drinking daytime event that I was like, I want to do.
Speaker 2: This is the crawfish like closest to cray that.
Speaker 3: I would say, it's close. It's like a miniature lobster okay, yeah,
Speaker 3: or it's not a shrimp maybe, but it's less it
Speaker 3: has less taste to it. Also, you're putting so much
Speaker 3: spices in it. I mean, the thing that no one
Speaker 3: ever talks about is that, uh, crawfish is poverty food.
Speaker 3: It's the same as like all these dishes now that
Speaker 3: are so popular, and it's like, oh, this is this
Speaker 3: is the cheapest thing you could get, right. You would
Speaker 3: catch this in a lake. You catch it for free,
Speaker 3: like in a stream or a lake, and then you
Speaker 3: put tons of spices in there because it's like you
Speaker 3: have to make it taste good, right, and yeah, you
Speaker 3: do it as cheaply as you possibly can't.
Speaker 2: Where do you buy crawfish? Do you go to the
Speaker 2: grocery store you.
Speaker 3: Have getting shifting them shipped in? It comes it becomes luxury,
Speaker 3: exactly the total opposite. If I do it here, I
Speaker 3: have to spend like hundreds of dollars to have it
Speaker 3: air fraid in because they have to ship them live.
Speaker 2: Oh but yeah, because they'll rot or wow. So you
Speaker 2: just get a crate full of live bugs.
Speaker 3: Like eighty pounds of them, wow, and I'll boil them
Speaker 3: up and serve them and stuff and it's it's fun.
Speaker 2: Eighty pounds of crawfish? Is that hundreds of crawfish?
Speaker 3: I think it's probably, uh, it's probably like a couple
Speaker 3: of hundred crawfish. Wow. I'm not trying to think, because
Speaker 3: there's not a lot of meat on these guys.
Speaker 2: You know, do they scream when you boil them?
Speaker 3: They do not know? Okay, I do not.
Speaker 2: Because loves are screamed, don't they They do?
Speaker 3: But isn't that just the steam escaping their shells?
Speaker 2: That's I hope that's true. Actually, I hope that I heard.
Speaker 3: I think it was. Yeah. And also crawfish there basically
Speaker 3: are bugs, you know, these are they are the lowest,
Speaker 3: they're very a very low life form. I like them
Speaker 3: a lot, but I just I don't feel it's not
Speaker 3: the same as mammal, right what we should be eating.
Speaker 3: Probably it's just these circs of crawfish, yeah, because they
Speaker 3: have a lot of good stuff in them.
Speaker 2: Do you ever watch alone?
Speaker 3: I have watched it. I've watched pretty much almost survival shows.
Speaker 3: I've watched a little bit of them.
Speaker 2: Okay, we've been watching it again recently.
Speaker 3: Do you go through Naked and Afraid or No? I don't.
Speaker 3: When I hear that name, I think it's cheap. That's
Speaker 3: got to be cheap, right, it's cheap. It's so like
Speaker 3: so like, I mean, I like negga Afraid because it's
Speaker 3: so tacky. It's just like they invented your PSR. Like
Speaker 3: what this is all just invented? Are your primitive Survival
Speaker 3: Rating to give to you? It's everything is constructed, there's nothing,
Speaker 3: you know, it's all this thing where because I do
Speaker 3: a lot of backpacking and stuff, and there's so much
Speaker 3: things on those shows where they drum up the danger
Speaker 3: it's so dangerous and really it's not that dangerous at all.
Speaker 3: Alone though, Does that feel legitimate? I think that's more
Speaker 3: much molegitimate yeah, I.
Speaker 2: Mean they're eating mice, eating mice constantly.
Speaker 3: The thing to me is just the literally being alone aspect.
Speaker 2: People lose their minds.
Speaker 3: I don't want to do anything like that alone ever.
Speaker 2: Can you The one I'm watching now, they're in Mongolia.
Speaker 2: You're just alone for seventy days, mice crawling all over you,
Speaker 2: just no one to talk to, although they get to
Speaker 2: talk to somebody once a week. That's what they don't
Speaker 2: tell you. I don't know what it's like a I
Speaker 2: think it's called like redemption. It's people who have failed before.
Speaker 3: That's the only thing about these shows. There's a whole
Speaker 3: new class of people who have like you that you know,
Speaker 3: not the Bachelor. When you watch those people there, they
Speaker 3: have made a lifestyle around being contestants on these shows.
Speaker 3: They haven't.
Speaker 2: That's their talent and there's lingo.
Speaker 3: Yes, they have shorthand, and that's what's happened with these shows. Now,
Speaker 3: there's so many survival shows where people have like a shorthand.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you watch the first season of Alone compared to now,
Speaker 2: it's a completely different Like the people have obviously watched
Speaker 2: the show and I've learned to actually build structures and stuff.
Speaker 2: The first season, they're like just wrapped up in a tarp,
Speaker 2: and now they're in log cabins. They're like literally using
Speaker 2: like Lincoln logs to build cabins.
Speaker 3: I gotta watch that one. You don't have to watch it.
Speaker 2: I mean this season in particular, every episode someone is
Speaker 2: eating a mouse. You see them gutting the mouse. It's disgusting.
Speaker 3: A mouse is just the worst thing to eat.
Speaker 2: I think once you've eaten the mouse, you've lost. Yeah,
Speaker 2: no amount of money will ever make up for the
Speaker 2: fact that you eat a mouse to try to survive
Speaker 2: on a reality show. Just go home.
Speaker 3: I don't know, it doesn't make any sense. I really
Speaker 3: like a tiny snake than a mouse.
Speaker 2: Oh, I would absolutely.
Speaker 3: I've eaten snake before. I think I have a snake
Speaker 3: sausage one.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, which is everybody takes a sausage. I
Speaker 2: would probably eat a mouse sausage to be honest.
Speaker 3: Mouse just the thought of it. I don't know something
Speaker 3: about that. I would not. I would not eat a
Speaker 3: mouse sausage. Definitely wouldn't.
Speaker 2: I mean I can't imagine, I mean, the amount of
Speaker 2: mice that would happen. I apologize to a listener. You'd
Speaker 2: rather eat a rat.
Speaker 3: Than a mouse. Why Because rats bigger. So it's like
Speaker 3: the meat is further away from the things you don't
Speaker 3: want to eat. There's something about the size of an
Speaker 3: animal where I feel like there's like a separation between
Speaker 3: right edible and edible. There's more physical distance. That's what
Speaker 3: gets me, because there's no way unless you're doing the
Speaker 3: mouse out, and when you're alone, you've got the time
Speaker 3: to really separate the stuff. I couldn't run into this
Speaker 3: bathroom right now.
Speaker 2: I imagine people are eating things when they listen to
Speaker 2: a podcast frequently. Yeah, there should be some sort of warning,
Speaker 2: but unfortunately not this episode. They'll probably just stop listening
Speaker 2: to the podcast altogether now, and we've lost hundreds of listeners.
Speaker 3: All these gen zs. They want warnings, they want oh
Speaker 3: spoil they're warning.
Speaker 2: They want eating warning.
Speaker 4: Oh there's gonna be some flashes, gen Z look out.
Speaker 4: Oh you got epilepsy, don't go to the movies. Stay home,
Speaker 4: it's my tim Allen ran Hey, stay home, just die.
Speaker 3: Just you know what, You better get busy living or
Speaker 3: get busy dying.
Speaker 2: Well, I think we should talk about something else. For
Speaker 2: something else we do need to talk about. I was
Speaker 2: really excited to have you here today.
Speaker 3: I was excited to be here.
Speaker 2: I thought we'd have a nice time. I loved Johnny.
Speaker 2: What could possibly go wrong? So it's a little surprised,
Speaker 2: you know. Of course the podcast is called I said
Speaker 2: no Gifts.
Speaker 3: I was kind of told that late oh late in
Speaker 3: the game.
Speaker 2: Yeah, didn't at least call you on the way over.
Speaker 3: My reps try to get a hold of me, and
Speaker 3: I just have you know, I have a no. I
Speaker 3: only answered the phone on odd minutes, So it's just
Speaker 3: like a thing I have.
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, Well that explains then why we've kind of
Speaker 2: got this gift here, this massive item.
Speaker 3: Yeah, should I open it? Here on the kind of
Speaker 3: already opened?
Speaker 2: It is out of the bag. I don't know what
Speaker 2: it is. Well, oh okay, now that I'm looking at
Speaker 2: the label, I know what it is. And this is
Speaker 2: actually a great thing to own. It's a folding hand truck.
Speaker 3: Well, like all gifts I give, I like to give
Speaker 3: something that I own myself, and I have one of these,
Speaker 3: and it has been indispensable in my life and sense
Speaker 3: where I cannot believe how much I've used this for
Speaker 3: how much I paid for it. What are you using
Speaker 3: your hand truck for well, I was gonna gift you
Speaker 3: a landscaping rock, but I just realized I didn't have
Speaker 3: them the effort to move it today. What is a
Speaker 3: landscaping rock. It's a rock that you use for landscaping.
Speaker 3: It's like a rock that you you know, like a
Speaker 3: sort of you would put maybe over there by that
Speaker 3: grass to create a little bit of a different feel.
Speaker 2: Oh so it's like a piece of It's not a
Speaker 2: like a primitive tool.
Speaker 3: No, like a big rock. It's just a mess a
Speaker 3: large stone that has an interesting shape that you can use.
Speaker 2: Do you have a rock sling around your yard?
Speaker 3: I have a bunch of them, Yeah, I take I
Speaker 3: have like two of them. I was gonna I keep
Speaker 3: wanting to get some bigger ones, but the ones I
Speaker 3: have we're as big as I can physically move myself.
Speaker 3: I think any like a forklift to get one I
Speaker 3: really want. Where did you get them? I got them
Speaker 3: from a city park. They're still yeah, they're stolen, but
Speaker 3: I mean they were at the They were behind like
Speaker 3: a k rail. So no, I was looking at him.
Speaker 2: Right right, Yeah, how did you get them out of
Speaker 2: the park?
Speaker 3: He just picked it up. I picked it up, watched
Speaker 3: it way, and I put it in the trunk and
Speaker 3: I took it home. It was, you know, a great
Speaker 3: physical effort that I expended to do this.
Speaker 2: Did anyone see you on your way out?
Speaker 3: You know, I don't care what am gonna do. Call
Speaker 3: the police, tell him like a like a guy just
Speaker 3: stole a rock. Cops are go and be like, Okay,
Speaker 3: we have a woman who just died at McDonald's. You
Speaker 3: want us to go deal with this guy who stole
Speaker 3: a rock. So I feel like that's the lot of
Speaker 3: stuff I'll do that. I feel like, if I think
Speaker 3: about it, if someone calls the cops, the cops are
Speaker 3: going to laugh.
Speaker 2: Yeah, there are, I mean a decent amount of low
Speaker 2: level crimes, right, But I think within a city like
Speaker 2: Los Angeles, there are just other things going on.
Speaker 3: Oh so is that a crime?
Speaker 2: Taking a rock?
Speaker 3: If you were a police officer, I would say, I'm sorry, officer,
Speaker 3: I didn't see any sign that said I couldn't take
Speaker 3: this boulder.
Speaker 2: That's true, that's very true, and then asked to go
Speaker 2: through the courts system the amount of money being spent
Speaker 2: to decide whether or not you are a criminal.
Speaker 3: Right, I'm a taxpayer.
Speaker 2: The jury selection for that court case fascinating. Oh man, okay,
Speaker 2: so you've taken two rocks?
Speaker 3: Yeah, are you?
Speaker 2: And so you'll just be walking through a parking and
Speaker 2: say that looks like a nice rock.
Speaker 3: Well, I kind of hike like a like a hiking spot.
Speaker 3: There's a lot of work then, well, usually at where
Speaker 3: the cars are parked kind of Oh sure, so they're
Speaker 3: part of a parking lot. Yeah, I'm not carrying it
Speaker 3: like that far, but I did have to haft it
Speaker 3: over a Jersey barrier. Okay, what you know, like a
Speaker 3: k rail? You know that is concrete k rail? Oh
Speaker 3: a k rail?
Speaker 2: Yeah, sure, so it's just oh the thing that's like
Speaker 2: there to stop you from driving over an edge or whatever.
Speaker 3: Yeah, those big concrete wall things. That's where it was.
Speaker 3: I think it was for erosion or something. But the
Speaker 3: rock itself was just kind of haphazardly there, and I thought, like,
Speaker 3: you know, I'd like to acquire this, and that's you know,
Speaker 3: you have a hand truck, I mean the hand truck,
Speaker 3: this one. I use it for gardening a lot, for everything,
Speaker 3: and the fact that it folds up is just really convenient.
Speaker 2: Right, pop it in the car. Then take it wherever
Speaker 2: you needed to pick things up, move that rock. So
Speaker 2: are you taking it with you places to get things
Speaker 2: or you're just keeping it at home for when you
Speaker 2: bring back back a big bag of soil.
Speaker 3: I've done both. Yeah, I definitely have used it to
Speaker 3: bring stuff down the driveway. It's really heavy.
Speaker 2: When did you buy it? Was it for a specific
Speaker 2: reason or did you just think I might need this
Speaker 2: in the future.
Speaker 3: I have a lot of crap. I have a lot
Speaker 3: of like tools and stuff and shovels and picks and
Speaker 3: just all kinds of a lot of like stuff. Right,
Speaker 3: So I got that when I first we first moved
Speaker 3: into our house, and I was like, I need this
Speaker 3: for for moving stuff, you know, for like moving heavy things,
Speaker 3: because it's a real it's a real backsaver.
Speaker 2: It is a you do a lot of gardening, yeah,
Speaker 2: like a recent development in your life or.
Speaker 3: No, I'm done it for like a long time. It's
Speaker 3: like almost I would say, an obsession. Really, Oh yeah,
Speaker 3: I was like for a while I was almost unhealthily
Speaker 3: obsessed with it, Like it was this thing where I
Speaker 3: was just ruled my thought all the time. What did
Speaker 3: that lead to?
Speaker 2: Just a beautiful garden outstanding garden.
Speaker 3: Yeah, outstanding I had. I had two plots and then
Speaker 3: some I used to live in Frogtown years ago, and
Speaker 3: there was a community garden that opened up basically right
Speaker 3: after we moved in, right across the street, and I
Speaker 3: was just there every day. I was Yeah, I just
Speaker 3: loved it. And I was like, go, I'll go nuts
Speaker 3: in there and right, growing as much as I possibly
Speaker 3: could produce. Yeah. I like to grow vegetables, Okay, I
Speaker 3: had to grow many vegetables. I mean I have like
Speaker 3: anytime I go to someone's house, I'm like, you got
Speaker 3: you got an empty space there?
Speaker 2: I have this little over here like a vegetable garden
Speaker 2: that I write it's an absolute message.
Speaker 3: Behind that wall.
Speaker 2: See that little like concrete thing with the plants on
Speaker 2: top of it. Beneath there is a bunch of soil.
Speaker 3: Okay.
Speaker 2: Unfortunately, the people who built this house planted mint in there, right,
Speaker 2: and mint is literally impossible to remove.
Speaker 3: I mean, you can get rid of it.
Speaker 2: I've tried, really, and I think I always miss one
Speaker 2: strand and then it repopulates the entire thing.
Speaker 3: That's interesting, Yeah, because especially in that area, because it's
Speaker 3: probably dormant underneath the sidewalk area there because it's like
Speaker 3: rhizomal so it's just going to be just the side
Speaker 3: shot roots, right, it's uh yeah.
Speaker 2: So I'll plant something in there and then it just
Speaker 2: gets overtaken by mint. I mean there's mint popping out
Speaker 2: of that.
Speaker 3: I can see it.
Speaker 2: I loved, obviously love the smell of mint.
Speaker 3: It's wonderful, but it's it's very aggressive. You might be
Speaker 3: able to get rid of it in the fall because
Speaker 3: it will start to die back. Uh And I mean
Speaker 3: it needs a lot of water. If you stop watering
Speaker 3: that area for a while in the fall, you might
Speaker 3: be able to get rid of it. Because you don't you
Speaker 3: have those trees that rosemary doesn't need much water. That
Speaker 3: tree isn't eat me water at all. I mean, I
Speaker 3: could do a full consult if you like. But that's
Speaker 3: that's a different thing you're talking about. Like lighting is
Speaker 3: a big issue with the gardening. That's that's such a
Speaker 3: big deal, right, and seasonal planting and people I don't
Speaker 3: I only recently learned about some stuff to where you
Speaker 3: just if you plant something in the wrong time, there's
Speaker 3: no point in even trying. It just doesn't send a chance. Yeah,
Speaker 3: And there's also the other way around, where you plant
Speaker 3: something at the right time, you just can't kill it.
Speaker 3: Like what mint. Mint is definitely one thing I would
Speaker 3: say that, like certain I don't know what's something that
Speaker 3: really does. Like if you put certain winter plants, like
Speaker 3: the second spring plants in the ground at the right time,
Speaker 3: they will just flourish.
Speaker 2: Really yeah, I mean, mint to me is something you
Speaker 2: should only ever have in a pot.
Speaker 3: You ever need that much mint. I have a ton
Speaker 3: of it in the ground in our front yard. But
Speaker 3: that's like a thing where it's like a groundcover almost. Yeah,
Speaker 3: it goes nuts. It's insane. Right now. What are you
Speaker 3: doing with all of your vegetables? I try to eat them?
Speaker 3: Do you give a lot away? I don have? Like squash.
Speaker 3: It was a summer two summers ago or three summers
Speaker 3: ago where it was just busting out. I was eating
Speaker 3: squash every single day. Like, were you delicious? Oh my god,
Speaker 3: it's so good. Have you ever had fresh, fresh grilled zucchini? No,
Speaker 3: it is. You slice it thin, just a little salt
Speaker 3: and pepper, maybe some garlic powder and rubs. You paint
Speaker 3: some oil on there, you know, brush some oil on it,
Speaker 3: just grill it. I like it kind of where it's
Speaker 3: it turns almost where it's not al dente at all.
Speaker 3: It's very almost mushy. Oh I like it.
Speaker 2: I was going to tell you I've only ever been
Speaker 2: served mushy zucchini. No, really, I don't do well with
Speaker 2: the mush.
Speaker 3: Well, you know what, that makes sense, and you're you're
Speaker 3: right because that's a personal preference. But you can do it, obviously,
Speaker 3: you can do it not mushy. I like, I guess
Speaker 3: I do like it kind of al dente, like just
Speaker 3: but edging toward mush Like there's a fine line. But
Speaker 3: when you have it, when you do it right, it's just,
Speaker 3: oh my god, it's like the great I think it's
Speaker 3: just the greatest thing ever. Because you have these if
Speaker 3: you pick them when they're small enough. That's the thing
Speaker 3: is people always pick stuff the wrong time. Yeah, it's
Speaker 3: too big and this big thing it's so stiff and
Speaker 3: like it's just not flavorless. Yeah, the small zucchini or
Speaker 3: the small squash is good, and or like young okra
Speaker 3: is really good. Oh okra.
Speaker 2: Okay, how do you prepare okra outside of the one
Speaker 2: way I've ever eaten it.
Speaker 3: Which is right? Yeah, I usually make like a little
Speaker 3: like sort of a stew.
Speaker 2: Or tomatoes I've had stewed over, Yeah.
Speaker 3: Stewed okra. I mean it's sort of like with the
Speaker 3: tomatoes because the acid and the tomatoes cuts down on
Speaker 3: the the mucus of the the okra, because it does
Speaker 3: have its technically a mucus. Yeah, it's it's considered a
Speaker 3: mucilin agous vegetable. Is that true, Yeah, it is. It
Speaker 3: does have a lot of I don't know what it's
Speaker 3: technically called, but it's it's like a form of slime.
Speaker 3: It's very slimy.
Speaker 2: What are what are other vegetables in that category?
Speaker 3: I don't really know exactly. I feel like there's other ones.
Speaker 3: Maybe certain beans have that. Oh that kind of makes sense.
Speaker 3: I don't know. It's pretty unique, though, I think.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know. I wouldn't even be able to
Speaker 2: tell you what okra looks like in the wild. I've
Speaker 2: only ever seen it prepared as a food.
Speaker 3: Oh really, it looks it's actually a relative of the
Speaker 3: hibiscus plant. Oh, and it has these really very pretty
Speaker 3: flowers of the early morning. They are like the super
Speaker 3: creamy white. They have like a fringe of red to them.
Speaker 3: And there has a stamen. It looks just like just
Speaker 3: like a hibiscus flower, very similar. Wow, it's really cool,
Speaker 3: like sort of sometimes three three lobed or five lobed leaves.
Speaker 3: They get really tall too. They can get really bad
Speaker 3: sometimes like eight feet tall.
Speaker 2: Is there anything you're growing right now that you're particularly
Speaker 2: proud of?
Speaker 3: I just turned. I just harvested all my garlic. Oh
Speaker 3: so I take all the garlic and I hang it
Speaker 3: up and like clusters in the trees to dry for
Speaker 3: a few weeks. There was one year where I had
Speaker 3: so much garlic, like in the pandemic when there was
Speaker 3: a garlic shortage, I was like, I'm gonna I'm gonna
Speaker 3: have garlic. I grew. I must have grew like sixty
Speaker 3: seventy heads of garlic. Oh, like four different varieties too.
Speaker 2: How does garlic grow? Is Is it like a tuber?
Speaker 3: Yeah? I don't know if it's technically a tuber. I
Speaker 3: think it might be. What do they call it? Like
Speaker 3: a bulb? Because it looks like a bulb. You just
Speaker 3: put the clove in the ground and you put it
Speaker 3: where the pointy end is up, okay, and it roots,
Speaker 3: it roots out and then it shoots up a little
Speaker 3: green sort of like onion looking stock, right, and then
Speaker 3: you garlic is in the ground for sometimes as much
Speaker 3: as nine months. You put it in the ground in September,
Speaker 3: and in places that are cold, it will overwinter in
Speaker 3: the ground and then it shoots up some of the
Speaker 3: first things to come up in the spring. And then
Speaker 3: you wait until maybe like the three or four of
Speaker 3: the bottom leaves are dry, and then you harvest it
Speaker 3: and you have to hang it up to dry because
Speaker 3: you want to be to dry out to harden. Basically,
Speaker 3: you can cook with fresh garlic, but it's it's different.
Speaker 3: It's much more mellow.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, strengthens as it dry, It.
Speaker 3: Does, I think it does. Also, there's something with the
Speaker 3: I don't really know this is this is edge of
Speaker 3: my knowledge here with garla.
Speaker 2: I mean that's a decent amount of knowledge. Is this
Speaker 2: all self taught?
Speaker 3: Yeah? I mean that's the thing about gardening is so
Speaker 3: much bogus on the internet where because your climate zone
Speaker 3: matters so much. And also there's there's people who buy
Speaker 3: tons of tomatoes and stuff and they put them in
Speaker 3: It says full sun, but that's not California full sun. Right,
Speaker 3: You didn grow great tomatoes in California in half shade
Speaker 3: or more shade than that, because these are plants that
Speaker 3: are used to having a ton of moisture. They're from
Speaker 3: South America. They don't want to have they don't want
Speaker 3: to have this desert full sun on them. They'll just
Speaker 3: they will get destroyed. Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 2: Fun doing like good information on the internet's nearly impossible.
Speaker 3: Especially now it's done.
Speaker 2: The how tos and everything are all fake.
Speaker 3: It's all done. It's all just like clickbait. Oh my god,
Speaker 3: I can't believe. And don't don't get me started.
Speaker 2: Don't get me started, kills me. You can't get any information.
Speaker 3: It's almost like we have to start a community together
Speaker 3: and you have to get some land and defend our community.
Speaker 3: Some like that.
Speaker 2: No, it really is so. I mean, I guess if
Speaker 2: you like, the secret I think now is to type
Speaker 2: the word reddit in next to whatever information you're looking for.
Speaker 2: But then you still have to comb through all of
Speaker 2: that information, see like do I trust this stranger? But
Speaker 2: I guess it's better than when you get onto one
Speaker 2: of these clickbait things where it's clearly written by some
Speaker 2: copywriter that oh my god, I've done jobs like that
Speaker 2: where I'm like, I don't know anything about this, but
Speaker 2: I just have to fill fifty, like five hundred words
Speaker 2: with this keyword one hundred times.
Speaker 3: Nightmare YouTube too, I watch like when I was first
Speaker 3: arnted to boil crawfish, I spent like three weeks, four
Speaker 3: weeks watching so many YouTube videos just over and over again.
Speaker 3: It was like this dominated my brain to the point
Speaker 3: where Okay, I think I have this. You have to
Speaker 3: like have it in your you have to have the
Speaker 3: feel of it, and you have to fail. I think too,
Speaker 3: that's the key.
Speaker 2: Did you fail? Initially I didn't.
Speaker 3: Fail fail, but if my first batch was not as
Speaker 3: flavorful as it should be, because you know, when you do
Speaker 3: something for the first time, you're like, oh, is this
Speaker 3: this seems like a lot. It seems like a lot
Speaker 3: to do anything because the amounts always feel people who
Speaker 3: are good chefs like I am not a good chef.
Speaker 3: I watch people who are. You know, you see someone
Speaker 3: who's like a naturally good chef, they just feel for it,
Speaker 3: like what are you doing? You just you're talking to
Speaker 3: me as you're cutting something. Are you kidding me?
Speaker 2: It requires all of my con I'm so nervous.
Speaker 3: Yeah, because when I'm cooking, I am doing our talk
Speaker 3: to me, I am. I do not want to mess
Speaker 3: this up. It's all I can think about.
Speaker 2: Because if I do, it will ruin my night.
Speaker 3: Oh, because you have to. Could you imagine serving something
Speaker 3: that's not cool?
Speaker 2: I would never invite someone over for dinner. There's no way,
Speaker 2: are you kidding?
Speaker 3: Oh my god? The stress I like. I kind of
Speaker 3: like the stress, but I I have to be engaged
Speaker 3: in it fully otherwise I will just be I'm like
Speaker 3: a wreck. I'm just a fucking sweaty wreck.
Speaker 2: I mean, there is something nice about the stress of
Speaker 2: like doing a thing that's not related to like for me,
Speaker 2: like not related to how I make a living.
Speaker 3: Yeah exact, I'm just like I'm.
Speaker 2: Stressing about a vegetable or whatever, or how this is
Speaker 2: going to be baked, that will the outcome of That
Speaker 2: means nothing in my actual life.
Speaker 3: Did you get into baking?
Speaker 2: That's all I do, that's the only that's the only
Speaker 2: sort of food I make at homes baked good.
Speaker 3: See, I'm opposite. I don't like baking because baking is
Speaker 3: so precise, right, I like to build baked. I'm gonna
Speaker 3: do a little I'm gonna do a little jazz, you know,
Speaker 3: ultimately an artist, I'm ultimately I'm sort of a jazz
Speaker 3: artist when it comes to I like to throw a
Speaker 3: little sad dash here kind of thing.
Speaker 2: I mean. That is the nice thing about cooking is
Speaker 2: I mean, you can eventually ruin a food, but there
Speaker 2: are a lot of like safety nets where you can
Speaker 2: keep like tooling around with it. But with baking, once
Speaker 2: it's in the oven, whatever you put in there is
Speaker 2: essentially the finished product. But it's nice because if you
Speaker 2: once you get a hang of it, and if you
Speaker 2: can measure correctly and follow directions, you know, it will
Speaker 2: probably be a good product.
Speaker 3: You ever me like not bread or anything like that. No,
Speaker 3: see that any type of bread. I get freaked out.
Speaker 3: See that's what I want to be able to do.
Speaker 2: No, I mean good, non, God.
Speaker 3: I would kill to be There's recipes I see on
Speaker 3: TikTok and stuff where I'm like, oh my god, this
Speaker 3: looks I'd be able to make homemade like chicken curry
Speaker 3: with dumbread or something like that, or absolute.
Speaker 2: Dream and none and like non pieda tortillas are all
Speaker 2: essentially the same ingredients, but they're very difficult to make.
Speaker 3: They are when they're good, they're just like so good
Speaker 3: where you're you can't go back, No, you can't go back.
Speaker 2: And a lot of restaurants, I think underestimate how important
Speaker 2: that part of the meal is.
Speaker 3: That's what that's what I'm there for, truly for. If
Speaker 3: it's tortillas, I'm there for the tortilla.
Speaker 2: Yes, that's a big problem with La Mexican food. I've
Speaker 2: read articles about this. Actually there aren't a lot of
Speaker 2: good large flower tortillas in Los Angeles.
Speaker 3: But when you see them being made like in front
Speaker 3: of you.
Speaker 2: Like, oh, it's all I want in the world. God, damn,
Speaker 2: have you ever made a tort you?
Speaker 3: Oh No, I don't know. I won't even I mean
Speaker 3: I should, I should get into that. There's so many
Speaker 3: things I would like to do. God, maybe we should
Speaker 3: do that.
Speaker 2: I mean, I mean, it's during pandemic and they tasted good.
Speaker 2: But the shape was always like it looked like Idaho
Speaker 2: or something it was like, and I wanted to just
Speaker 2: be a nice round thing.
Speaker 3: Idaho is a bad shape. Is the shape that is
Speaker 3: so specific it just means this is not round. This
Speaker 3: is the not the not round is shape.
Speaker 2: They dropped the ball in a huge way. Then it's
Speaker 2: right next to Utah, which is a really nice little
Speaker 2: square boot with the dip.
Speaker 3: With the dip, it's got you know, chunk.
Speaker 2: It's geometrically perfect in a way.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: But then you look at Idaho and you think somebody
Speaker 2: made that by mistake.
Speaker 3: Yeah. I don't know the history of that, but it's
Speaker 3: got I'm sure it's fraught with probably a lot of killing.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm sure there's a lot of killing that which.
Speaker 3: I don't know. That's what I love about all that
Speaker 3: Western history is it's just even under the banner of heaven,
Speaker 3: it's just how much back and forth, just so heavy duty,
Speaker 3: so brutal.
Speaker 2: A lot of very graphic violence. Oh yeah, a lot
Speaker 2: of Uh what is is that in the book The
Speaker 2: Mountain Meadows Massacre, I.
Speaker 3: Think there's a couple of maskers in there. Yeahs, and
Speaker 3: they are massacres.
Speaker 2: Massacres within the last two hundred years. It's not like
Speaker 2: ancient history. Yeah, awful, But that was the wild West.
Speaker 3: It was. It's called the wild West. I guess I
Speaker 3: always forget that wild.
Speaker 2: You camp a lot, not a lot, I feel like,
Speaker 2: I mean, the fact that I know you camp.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm indicating by you that you're a camp I'm
Speaker 3: a showcaser, You're a camping, You're a show camper. If
Speaker 3: I'm gonna feel this bad, I'm gonna tell people about it,
Speaker 3: I'm gonna film it. I'm gonna like take the pictures
Speaker 3: and make it look sexy as possible.
Speaker 2: It always looks incredible. It always seems like you're enjoying yourself.
Speaker 3: I am enjoying myself. I guess there's always a piece
Speaker 3: where you know it's hard to sleep. Yeah, that's the problem.
Speaker 3: Each year I do it, it becomes harder to sleep.
Speaker 3: And even though the equipment keeps getting better, it's just like, man,
Speaker 3: this is rough.
Speaker 2: How long do you go camping for where you go
Speaker 2: for a full week or is it just like an overnight?
Speaker 3: Usually like a week or so. But we'll do maybe
Speaker 3: three nights in the back country at the most. And
Speaker 3: that's like serious. We'll be in the back country off
Speaker 3: the trail. You've got to carry a lot in.
Speaker 2: Yeah, where do you like.
Speaker 3: To go camping? It's almost always in the Yosemite or
Speaker 3: that area. I have a good friend who is from
Speaker 3: Minnesota and he works out there. He works for the USGS,
Speaker 3: and he will take us on his off days. He
Speaker 3: has like, you know, eight or nine days off at
Speaker 3: a time, like his big because he hikes for a living.
Speaker 3: He's up in the back country. He counts some endangered
Speaker 3: species and measures them and all this stuff. Oh wow,
Speaker 3: he's our guide and he's taking me places that are
Speaker 3: just exceptional, like places where no one's I mean people
Speaker 3: have been everywhere obviously, but places where I think maybe
Speaker 3: one percent of the park visitors have gone because it's
Speaker 3: a deep off the trails. It's uh, do you feel
Speaker 3: like you're in danger? Uh? Not with him, but they had.
Speaker 3: I did get one of those little in reach garment
Speaker 3: and reach things last year because I was.
Speaker 2: Thinking, is that as a GPS, a GPS.
Speaker 3: Things that we can call. You can do an SOS
Speaker 3: if you need to, you can text. You have a
Speaker 3: couple of texts. You can text like, hey, I'm alive.
Speaker 2: Addicted to our devices for Ultimately.
Speaker 3: I think it's yes, it's addicted to being connected, you know.
Speaker 3: But the uh, because if he were to die suddenly,
Speaker 3: I will be pretty pretty horrifying.
Speaker 2: So they are you being lost in the woods, Yeah,
Speaker 2: not knowing what direction to turn getting more and more lost.
Speaker 2: The panic that's setting in. That doesn't work for me.
Speaker 3: The good thing is there's lots of water to drink
Speaker 3: out there, and you know, you kind of know where
Speaker 3: you are. It's just more about can you get there
Speaker 3: with the available food that you have.
Speaker 2: Why is it so difficult to get to these certain areas?
Speaker 2: Is it a lot of like rock climbing.
Speaker 3: That's much rock climbing. It's just literally physical distance. You
Speaker 3: have to go up a climb up a hill for
Speaker 3: a couple of miles, through bushwack a bit through some
Speaker 3: trees and stuff, and then you get to like an
Speaker 3: out well. You know, it's elevation too. Elevation is a
Speaker 3: big deal because it's hard to get up there.
Speaker 2: Have you seen any wild animals? Yeah, you know.
Speaker 3: We saw last time last summer. We saw this bear.
Speaker 3: It was barely through the woods. We didn't know what
Speaker 3: it was at first. I thought it was like a
Speaker 3: bore or something. Was running so fast as we're running
Speaker 3: along this dirt road we were driving to to where
Speaker 3: we're going to camp that night, and it was going nuts.
Speaker 3: And then we camped that night. We set up This
Speaker 3: is a less less primitive camping we're at like a
Speaker 3: spot that had at firing and stuff, and uh, we
Speaker 3: climb up this little peaked at sunset to go look
Speaker 3: over the valley on their side and we're up there.
Speaker 3: I'm taking a picture of the four of us total.
Speaker 3: And right after I take that picture, we see this
Speaker 3: bear just full speed trucking through the meadow paralleled us
Speaker 3: and I wasn't able to get out my camera to
Speaker 3: take a picture of fast it was going so fast.
Speaker 3: And it was a big, big bear California. It's a
Speaker 3: black bear. So which they're I mean, they're truly not
Speaker 3: dangerous especially not or No, they're not. I mean what
Speaker 3: does that mean? It means that they are they're not
Speaker 3: brown bears, they're not grizzlies.
Speaker 2: Are grizzlies just like aggressive and they're out to kill there.
Speaker 3: Well, I don't know if they're not to kill so much.
Speaker 2: Grizzlies are only they're only out.
Speaker 3: To kill us. They want us to all die. Uh.
Speaker 3: It's the big difference is this. You can scare a
Speaker 3: black bear kind of black bear. The ideas you get big,
Speaker 3: you make a lot of noise and you can scare
Speaker 3: it and you will scare it. That bear that was
Speaker 3: running by us. It was probably deathly afraid of us,
Speaker 3: that's why it was running. It wasn't headed anywhere. Oh no,
Speaker 3: I mean, I'm sure it saw us and it started
Speaker 3: to start running. And what the brown bears, You don't
Speaker 3: aggress them. You're supposed to play dead because they will
Speaker 3: if you aggress them. That ratchets up to ratchets them up.
Speaker 3: I mean sometimes black bears will like nose through your
Speaker 3: shit and they'll steal stuff. But those are the ones
Speaker 3: that are closer to like campgrounds and stuff, and they will,
Speaker 3: you know, if they're habituated to do that, then they
Speaker 3: can be aggressive. But I think the wild, the chances
Speaker 3: of it's so low, if you're deep out there out
Speaker 3: in the back huntry, that you'll have a bad experience
Speaker 3: with an animal like that. Huh. I mean that's what
Speaker 3: I tell myself, That's what I've been told. I would
Speaker 3: have to to sleep at night. Oh my friend Steve
Speaker 3: didn't sleep that night. He stayed up till like five
Speaker 3: o'clock in the morning. Oh, you know, just because he
Speaker 3: was so scared of the bear coming to visit our camp.
Speaker 2: But the thing is, in those situations, I just think,
Speaker 2: if I'm awake it's still going to attack me. I'd
Speaker 2: rather at least get some sleep before being attacked.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, I don't want to be woken up
Speaker 3: with a buy a bear. I'd rather be I don't know.
Speaker 2: I feel like if I'm awake, I'm gonna make a
Speaker 2: miss I'm gonna freak out. But if I'm sleep, maybe
Speaker 2: the bear kind of nudges around. By the time i'm awake,
Speaker 2: it's left. But if I'm awake, I'm making bad decisions.
Speaker 3: But maybe that would scare the bear. It is big
Speaker 3: much for these things. You can scare them, same as coyotes.
Speaker 3: You know, coyotes don't scare me at all. They shouldn't.
Speaker 3: People who are scared of coyotes almost it makes me
Speaker 3: piss me off because it's like they're they're so frightened
Speaker 3: of everything, they're so frightened, and they're just they're just creatures.
Speaker 2: That live here, starving creatures.
Speaker 3: Yeah, they're starving creatures. Like I'm so scared of these codes.
Speaker 3: There hasn't been a coyote attack on a human adult
Speaker 3: in over one hundred years. It's about time some insane
Speaker 3: thing like that. One hundred years, I think there hasn't
Speaker 3: been a. There's only been one fatality the United States
Speaker 3: ever from a coyote on an adult. They've they've taken
Speaker 3: a bunch of kids.
Speaker 2: Oh, I don't like to hear that, but honest child snatchers.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's sad, but you know, you know, watch your kid.
Speaker 2: Yeah, the most the kid doing wandering around at night
Speaker 2: with kai coyotes.
Speaker 3: Parents, the parents, the parents. Yeah.
Speaker 2: I when I see a coyote, I I'd like to
Speaker 2: just stand there and.
Speaker 3: Look at it. Oh hell yeah.
Speaker 2: We look at each other and then I usually have
Speaker 2: to move because they don't move right, or when they
Speaker 2: do skiter away. That's I always feel kind of bad.
Speaker 2: I'm like, I'm sorry for interrupting your business. You're obviously
Speaker 2: looking for garbage.
Speaker 3: Do you ever walk toward them?
Speaker 2: I've never walked towards one. I mean, unless I need
Speaker 2: to get somewhere.
Speaker 3: Okay, have you I haven't, but just you know, to
Speaker 3: get closer. Look kind of thing, right. I love the
Speaker 3: look of a coyote. It's so cool.
Speaker 2: They're very unique, so scrunny and I don't know.
Speaker 3: Yah scruffy, and it's like they're they're traveling through a
Speaker 3: different realm. They live on a different plane, they see
Speaker 3: stuff that we don't see.
Speaker 2: Maybe I wonder if I have to imagine people have
Speaker 2: coyotes as pants. God, I mean people have everything as pets.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I can't. I menagine they're normal people. But I
Speaker 3: wonder what they'd be like because they're because there's they're
Speaker 3: pretty close to dogs.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I have to imagine you have to
Speaker 2: Is it from being a puppy. Yeah, I can't imagine
Speaker 2: you're just like out on sunset picking up a coyote
Speaker 2: and taking it home to right, But I imagine it's a
Speaker 2: pretty calm little creature.
Speaker 3: I wouldn't mind owning one. You never know, I might
Speaker 3: just tear ass, just rip up everything.
Speaker 1: You know.
Speaker 3: There's some dogs that just love to destroy.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean there are cats, all sorts of pets
Speaker 2: at home that just destroy everything. And then you see
Speaker 2: some YouTuber with a raccoon that's like lang lying on
Speaker 2: spackating grapes or whatever.
Speaker 3: So they're just showing you the good part, Yeah, exactly,
Speaker 3: they're showing you it's like everything. They're showing you the beautiful,
Speaker 3: luxurious aspect of it that's very the dark, hideous backside
Speaker 3: where the raccoon is like switching their medications around like that.
Speaker 3: It's like, oh, no, I took the heart medicine today.
Speaker 3: What the fuck? Those things are devious. They tear out
Speaker 3: my garden like crazy they do.
Speaker 2: I come back here and that have been done. Are
Speaker 2: like a person's been back here, but here it isn't
Speaker 2: it like that. They'll pick up pots and just throw
Speaker 2: them on the ground.
Speaker 3: You know why why they're trying to get grubs?
Speaker 2: Oh, they're looking for little bugs.
Speaker 3: Yeah, they eat these little little grubs in there. I've
Speaker 3: never heard of that though. They actually break your pockets.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'll come back here up there, They'll just knocked
Speaker 2: off fasts. Yeah, they're like they'll find weird things in
Speaker 2: my yard. I'm like, certainly you have other things.
Speaker 3: To do back here. Yeah, but I'm so smart.
Speaker 2: I guess they're bored and need food.
Speaker 3: I guess they have a rotation. So I'm good friends,
Speaker 3: not good friends, but I talk to frequently. One of
Speaker 3: the people who works at this garden store I go to.
Speaker 3: He's a very very smart man, older man. He was
Speaker 3: saying how the raccoons tend to make like they have
Speaker 3: a two week circuit, a lot of them, So you
Speaker 3: think just when you think like, Okay, they're not coming back.
Speaker 3: They come back. Why it's happened to me so many
Speaker 3: times because every morning we'll wake up, they go in
Speaker 3: the kitchen, I look in the garden and see like
Speaker 3: have I been hit? Did they come by? Have I
Speaker 3: been ransacked? And it's always the night. I think like, okay,
Speaker 3: they're not going to come tonight, and I wake up
Speaker 3: it's like, oh my god.
Speaker 2: Wow, So are they just touring the city.
Speaker 3: Yeah, they have like loop they have. They're so smart.
Speaker 3: They have like a memory of things. They have are
Speaker 3: like a bus driver or something like that, a terrorizing
Speaker 3: bus driver of sorts. It's really hard to defend against them.
Speaker 2: Yeah, what is there anything you can do?
Speaker 3: You can put down like hardwork cloth or chicken wire
Speaker 3: over your soil to prevent them from digging. Or you
Speaker 3: can almost daily put out red and black pepper mixture,
Speaker 3: which they don't like. They don't like strong smells like garlic,
Speaker 3: red pepper, black pepper mixed with vinegar and stuff. It's
Speaker 3: the most work I gave up because I have a
Speaker 3: banana tree. I think it's actually squirrels and rats eating
Speaker 3: the leaves of that, and I don't like to hear rats.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, but they're everywhere. You can't get rid of them.
Speaker 3: Don't like to hear that at all. I don't like
Speaker 3: it either, I really hate it. But they are. It's
Speaker 3: really hard to get rid of them. You have a
Speaker 3: banana tree, Yeah, I got bananas off at once.
Speaker 2: I mean, I guess that makes one time.
Speaker 3: One time. It's really hard. I don't know why it worked,
Speaker 3: but it did. I haven't gotten any sense. I think
Speaker 3: it's because the squirrels have been eating the leaves so
Speaker 3: much it hasn't been able to grow that well.
Speaker 2: How long does it take a banana to grow?
Speaker 3: They grow so fast. They're not technically trees. They're technically
Speaker 3: a plant, like a herbaceous plant. They don't wood out,
Speaker 3: you know. I mean like you can take a machete
Speaker 3: and chop through a whole banana slack with one stroke. Huh,
Speaker 3: it's not that hard.
Speaker 2: Do They get pretty tall?
Speaker 3: Don't get real tall. They'll get like maybe different varieties,
Speaker 3: but mine gets about fifteen feet tall maybe wow, maybe
Speaker 3: twelve feet tall, and it's just barren now. Yeah, right now.
Speaker 3: Bananas are weird because they so when a banana saw
Speaker 3: it grows, it puts off the fruit. You harvest the fruit.
Speaker 3: Once you harvest the fruits, there's a big, long, big
Speaker 3: sea pod that shoots out like an alien thing, and
Speaker 3: once that's harvested, it's called the mother. You're supposed to
Speaker 3: cut that down because that plan is done, and you
Speaker 3: chop it up and leave it in the ground for fertilizer.
Speaker 3: But other stalks will shoot up and the next tallest
Speaker 3: stock is will be the new mother, and that will
Speaker 3: should be the one that gives off bananas. So you're
Speaker 3: supposed to always only have one primary stock, even though
Speaker 3: the banana wants to shoot up in various places. So yeah,
Speaker 3: I think I messed up and maybe cut the new mother,
Speaker 3: and right now I have, like a I have two stalks,
Speaker 3: so it's sort of just ornamental at this point. Do
Speaker 3: you think you're able to fix it. I don't know.
Speaker 3: I was just out of town so much the last
Speaker 3: year that I wasn't able to attend to it like that.
Speaker 3: Because it needs a special fertilizer, it needs like extra water.
Speaker 3: I feel like it's so demanding. Yeah, they are. I mean,
Speaker 3: I don't know why it didn't fruit. I think it
Speaker 3: was just to stress so much stuff with these tropical plants.
Speaker 3: Is just about how the environment is so specific and right.
Speaker 3: You have to have the right amount of humidity, right
Speaker 3: amount of wind.
Speaker 2: Yeah, this does feel like a great weather for I
Speaker 2: mean a climate for a banana.
Speaker 3: But I got them. Baby, were they good bananas? They
Speaker 3: were excellent, they were They were very small.
Speaker 2: I love a small banana. Yeah, especially those like mini bananas.
Speaker 3: They were. Oh, they were so good. There's so and
Speaker 3: it tastes so much different than like your normal cavendish
Speaker 3: banana you buy the store. You know, there's only one
Speaker 3: type of banana. You buy one type.
Speaker 2: There's all stores only have one type of banana.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's a Cabindish variety. And now there's it's threatened
Speaker 3: to go away because of blight. Oh wow. Because all
Speaker 3: these growers like Dole was the main I mean they
Speaker 3: grow all pineapples and bananas, I think for the most part,
Speaker 3: like ninety percent or something. But they had this one
Speaker 3: variety of the cabin dish that they grow and now
Speaker 3: it's having problems. But they there's like three hundred varieties
Speaker 3: of bananas.
Speaker 2: So when these go away, just have to pick a
Speaker 2: new banana.
Speaker 3: Yes, but that's the problem is everything is geared towards
Speaker 3: the Cavendish, Like there's it's been propagated for so long
Speaker 3: that they they might be like a huge banana shortage
Speaker 3: at some point because of this blight that's going on. Wow,
Speaker 3: this is like a couple of years ago. I'm sure
Speaker 3: they've fixed it through massive amounts of chemicals and stuff.
Speaker 2: But have you had any other types of bananas? I'm
Speaker 2: curious what other bananas would even be like.
Speaker 3: I mean, there's a couple. There's a guy I know
Speaker 3: who's this amazing botanist. He lives in Texas. He has
Speaker 3: been in foxtron on Instagram. He goes a couple of
Speaker 3: different varieties of them, and I never tried his. But
Speaker 3: the ones I have I think are called ice cream. Oh,
Speaker 3: there's so many varieties. I mean, have you ever been
Speaker 3: to Hawaii? Yes? Did you have any bananas there?
Speaker 2: No, But I've had. I spent some time in Southeast
Speaker 2: Asia and I had bananas there.
Speaker 3: They a lot. You have tiny banana? Yeah, they taste different, right,
Speaker 3: much more fun to eat. Yeah. Some are more creamy,
Speaker 3: some are like a sweeter taste. I don't. I mean,
Speaker 3: I've I've probably had a few varieties, but this variety
Speaker 3: that I harvested. Definitely. It tasted like those small banas
Speaker 3: you have like in the tropics.
Speaker 2: I love those small bananas. And ultimately the ones you
Speaker 2: buy the sore too much banana. Yeah, halfway through them,
Speaker 2: like I don't this is too much and it's like
Speaker 2: gonna make me gag. Yeah, they're so they're too starchy, Yeah,
Speaker 2: way too starchy. Often too mushy, mushy, like a mush.
Speaker 3: I love a mush like it.
Speaker 2: Like a black banana. I mean that's the rotting on
Speaker 2: the counter.
Speaker 3: These bananas I harvested. I thought they were I thought
Speaker 3: they were bad, right, I was about to compost some
Speaker 3: and I cut them open and they were perfect. Oh
Speaker 3: so that's the thing is some of these weirder varieties
Speaker 3: when they when you think they are bad, is when
Speaker 3: they're perfectly ripe, right, I think as usually what happens
Speaker 3: is animals get to them. Like it's if you have
Speaker 3: a really good fruit, it's almost impossible to keep keep animals, like,
Speaker 3: oh my god, the peach.
Speaker 2: If you have stirrels, just eat all of our lemons
Speaker 2: and our oranges.
Speaker 3: If you have peaches, you're like, yeah, peach. I don't
Speaker 3: know a single person who has a stone fruit tree.
Speaker 3: They've got to enjoy more than like a few of them, shape,
Speaker 3: since these fuckers are just unstoppable.
Speaker 2: Yeah that our neighbor has a pomegranate tree that coaches
Speaker 2: over the fence here, and we might get one pomegranate here.
Speaker 3: The rest are half eaten by the time. Yeah, such
Speaker 3: a shit. You have to bag them up. Same with
Speaker 3: the figs. Figs are hard to get. I'm not a
Speaker 3: figure eater. Oh really, you know why?
Speaker 2: Mush it's a mush, it's a slime.
Speaker 3: I like them when it's like this is the grossest
Speaker 3: thing ever. I like them when it's like a sack. Oh,
Speaker 3: it's like a sack, and it's the best. It's so good.
Speaker 2: Then what about that it's good?
Speaker 3: I mean, I don't know. It's when it's one I'll
Speaker 3: get even worse for you. Here. I used to grow
Speaker 3: a lot of strawberries, and once in a while you
Speaker 3: get a strawberry that somehow the bugs have not touched it,
Speaker 3: It's been perfectly shaded whatever, and it literally starts to
Speaker 3: ferment inside the skin and you take aodbite of it.
Speaker 3: It sounds gross, right, but it has this effervescent quality
Speaker 3: to it. Because it started to ferment. It's a little
Speaker 3: bit boozy. Wow. So the flavor is I mean it's
Speaker 3: I think personally it's probably the best flavor that exists
Speaker 3: in the world. Is it? Is it fermented on the
Speaker 3: vine strawberry It's like it's a sack. It's it looks
Speaker 3: like you get gusher or something like that with booze.
Speaker 3: But that is Oh, that is good.
Speaker 2: But that feels like you can only get those by
Speaker 2: a mistake basically.
Speaker 3: Yeah. Oh, I've tried sense so many times. I just can't.
Speaker 3: I can't replicate it. I even tried to make strawberry
Speaker 3: wine last year. It was bad. It was it was
Speaker 3: real bad. It was so bad. I was just I
Speaker 3: was sad about what was that process? I mean, it's
Speaker 3: the whole thing. You get the fruit, you wash it,
Speaker 3: you you mash it, and I added the yeasts and stuff.
Speaker 3: I thought I could recreate that, but it just didn't work.
Speaker 3: I think I needed to the problem is I use
Speaker 3: the wrong type of yeast. You think I need to
Speaker 3: do some type of a natural yeast like a lambique
Speaker 3: yeast or something like that. And how long did it
Speaker 3: have to ferment? Just I only did it like maybe
Speaker 3: a week or two. Okay, so it's basically jail wine.
Speaker 3: That's completely But the yeast is so important. I mean,
Speaker 3: I used to brew a lot, but I don't. I
Speaker 3: don't know. It's so much work.
Speaker 2: You have so many productive habits.
Speaker 3: I guess it's all just like I don't know, it's
Speaker 3: not it's more just uh doing something. So I don't
Speaker 3: do something bad, I guess.
Speaker 2: But you're someone that I feel like could safely retire.
Speaker 3: I would.
Speaker 2: I don't think I can retire until I can think
Speaker 2: of one hobby I can do. Really what would I
Speaker 2: possibly do?
Speaker 3: But I also feel like I would. I would lose
Speaker 3: my mind if I was retired.
Speaker 2: I don't think you would. Oh my god, I would
Speaker 2: be gardening. You'd be hiking.
Speaker 3: Yeah, But that stuff is all just in between. Like
Speaker 3: I like working so much that I like I did
Speaker 3: this movie in September in Florida, like a month and
Speaker 3: a half. It was the most work I've ever done
Speaker 3: in my entire life, and I was so happy because
Speaker 3: I felt just like utterly consumed by the process of it,
Speaker 3: because it was just every single day I had to
Speaker 3: do stuff. And after that, I felt like, you know
Speaker 3: what I would like to do. I would like to
Speaker 3: work three hundred days of the year. That'd be great,
Speaker 3: you know, it'd be like this industry workhorse, just get
Speaker 3: ground to dust.
Speaker 2: I mean, as someone who has been basically unemployed for
Speaker 2: a year and a half, I can kind of yeah,
Speaker 2: I wouldn't mind having an actual job. Yeah, there's something
Speaker 2: nice about having to think about that.
Speaker 3: But also I say.
Speaker 2: That, yes, the reality, I mean, there's there's no winning there,
Speaker 2: certainly no.
Speaker 3: I think the winner is when you have that thing
Speaker 3: where it's regular and you can really it's enough. When
Speaker 3: you're working, you're really working a lot. So when you
Speaker 3: aren't working, you feel like I can justify the inactivity.
Speaker 2: Right right, Well, I think we should play a game. Okay,
Speaker 2: we're gonna play a game called Gift or a Curse Listener.
Speaker 2: We're taking a break from Gift Master for a minutes.
Speaker 2: Under construction. Okay, I need to number between one and
Speaker 2: ten from you seven. I have to do some like
Speaker 2: calculating right now to get our game pieces. Okay, So
Speaker 2: you can recommend something, promote something, do whatever you want.
Speaker 3: Come see me in New York in July twenty first,
Speaker 3: I think at the Soho Playhouse. Well, We'll be performing
Speaker 3: my one man show called Minnesota Reggae Colostomy Bag at
Speaker 3: the Soho Playhouse in July. Tickets are available on the
Speaker 3: Soho Playhouse website, or you can go to Johnny Pemberton
Speaker 3: dot dog. That is Johnny Pemberton dot dog and you
Speaker 3: can click the link and go through and get that.
Speaker 3: Take it because you got to get it because it's
Speaker 3: New York and we love theater.
Speaker 2: Great, excellent, cool. Everyone go see Johnny. I think you
Speaker 2: when I move here in twenty ten. You are probably
Speaker 2: the first live person I saw that made me laugh.
Speaker 2: Really yeah, I remember I was at what was the
Speaker 2: name of that thing?
Speaker 3: What's up? Tiger Lily? Okay, I remember all this.
Speaker 2: Person's so funny and that show was like four hours long,
Speaker 2: and so I was.
Speaker 3: I was a bruiser.
Speaker 2: Everyone go see Johnny. This is how we play Gift
Speaker 2: or a Curse. I'm going to name three things. You're
Speaker 2: gonna tell me if there are a gift or a
Speaker 2: curse and why, and then I'll tell you if you're
Speaker 2: right or wrong, because there are correct answers.
Speaker 3: I like that. Okay.
Speaker 2: Number one this is from a listener named Emily Gift
Speaker 2: or a curse. Pilots calling airline passengers souls.
Speaker 3: I e.
Speaker 2: There are three hundred souls on board.
Speaker 3: That's a curse. Why because it's just like, it's too
Speaker 3: much on top of what we already have to deal with.
Speaker 3: It should only be said in retrospect when they are
Speaker 3: in fact souls.
Speaker 2: Uh, Johnny, you're wrong.
Speaker 3: Okay, it's a gift.
Speaker 2: It terrifies everyone on board. Suddenly we're all spooked. We're
Speaker 2: thinking about mortality. I'm looking at the person next to me,
Speaker 2: thinking about there's a spirit, a soul next to me.
Speaker 2: We're essentially just now on a haunted flight. I mean,
Speaker 2: this has never happened to me. It feels like the
Speaker 2: pilot is trying to scare the passengers. Maybe it's like
Speaker 2: a way to get people to behave. Yeah, it's like,
Speaker 2: if you don't behave, you will be a soul.
Speaker 3: I see the gift of this.
Speaker 2: I think it's a gift or I know that's the
Speaker 2: correct answer. Okay, so you've missed the first one, and
Speaker 2: that's too bad. Number two this is from a listener
Speaker 2: named Lauren. Gift or a curse Fresca.
Speaker 3: What's a gift? Why? Because it's one of the few
Speaker 3: grapefruit flavored drinkable items out there. It's commercial, commercially available
Speaker 3: grapefruit drinkables.
Speaker 2: Correct, Yes, I love Fresca has been this diet drink
Speaker 2: for hundreds of years. It's really been out there. It's
Speaker 2: grapefruit flavored. It reminds me of Vicky Smith, the neighbor,
Speaker 2: you know, drinking her fresca. And again, there aren't that
Speaker 2: many grapefruit flavored things. I love grapefruit. I recently learned
Speaker 2: that grapefruit interacts with my medication, but I'm not gonna
Speaker 2: stop drinking it.
Speaker 3: Oh, it is like the most interactive thing of all.
Speaker 2: What is happening with grapefruit? It's just another citrus?
Speaker 3: Doesn't that make? That makes me like grapefruit so much more?
Speaker 3: Because I'm like, you're so powerful that most people can't
Speaker 3: even eat you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a fascinating fruit. And the when I get
Speaker 2: a glass of grapefruit juice, there's nothing better.
Speaker 3: I think it is just so great that I got
Speaker 3: some non I got grapefruit like cocktail at a restaurant
Speaker 3: there day. I couldn't even take a sick. I took
Speaker 3: a sip to say, this isn't juice, This is like
Speaker 3: something that's been concocted.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, that's an ad bastard'sation of a wonderful thing.
Speaker 3: But the real thing, especially if it's white grapefruit not
Speaker 3: really red. Oh I don't think I've had a white grapefruit.
Speaker 3: If you see grapefood's growing around La. The white grapefruit
Speaker 3: is the what is it the meat white, it's sort
Speaker 3: of like yellowish. So the grape is like yellow, and
Speaker 3: when you cut it open, it's the same color. It's yellow.
Speaker 3: It's like a sort of a pale and.
Speaker 2: The juice is almost like an orange juice.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's more it's more bitter than a grapefrud. It's
Speaker 3: it's more traditional. If you ever have like a tiki cocktail,
Speaker 3: it's it's white grapefruit. You can't buy white grapefruit in
Speaker 3: the stores because it's not like I mean, maybe some stores,
Speaker 3: but I'm pretty sure nowadays you can't buy it. But
Speaker 3: luckily we live here and you don't have to.
Speaker 2: I would love to have a grapefruit tree. Yeah, I'd
Speaker 2: love to eat a grapefruit for breakfast.
Speaker 3: I never do.
Speaker 2: But right, what a feeling I mean, it does, I mean, it's.
Speaker 3: A huge hassle. It is a hassle. It would be
Speaker 3: the hardest thing to eat. I eat it over the sink,
Speaker 3: like a real rack.
Speaker 2: Eat it. Do you just buy into it?
Speaker 3: I cut it into sections like an orange, and I
Speaker 3: just eat it like I just, you know, masticate it
Speaker 3: like a That sounds incredible.
Speaker 2: Yeah, just just duth absolutely interacting with all of your medications,
Speaker 2: just putting your life on the line.
Speaker 3: Good. Buy a lipitour.
Speaker 2: Absolutely a gift. We love a fresco. It's so refreshing.
Speaker 2: I can't remember the last time I had one, but yeah,
Speaker 2: I can imagine cracking one open and enjoying it.
Speaker 3: You had a Paloma Paloma. It's the cocktail. No, I've
Speaker 3: never had one. It's the best cocktail. Really. What's in
Speaker 3: a Paloma Paloma is lime juice. Not just lime juice,
Speaker 3: but job matt, what do you call it when you
Speaker 3: grind something up muddled muddle mines, yes, yes, muddled grapefruit
Speaker 3: tequila and you can do a rim okay, and then
Speaker 3: you put squirt in there or I to do a
Speaker 3: little bit of squirt and a little bit of grapefruit
Speaker 3: juice and some sod water and you garnish it with
Speaker 3: a bunch of mint. Oh, wonderful. It's just the greatest strength.
Speaker 3: It's truly the greatest strength.
Speaker 1: Do you know.
Speaker 2: I think home State the restaurant has frozen pal and
Speaker 2: I've had a sample of it before they'll give you
Speaker 2: a sample. There's a strong, very strong, even like the
Speaker 2: little teeth drove away drunk. You know it was extremely
Speaker 2: dangerous drink. Okay, you've gotten one right so far. Finally,
Speaker 2: this is from a listener named Michael. Give your a
Speaker 2: curse rinsing dishes before putting them in the dishwasher.
Speaker 3: It's a curse. Why because it's it's a thing you
Speaker 3: have to do. It's a thing.
Speaker 2: It's like a step, it's another stack.
Speaker 3: I think dishes are a curse in general. Yes, that's
Speaker 3: why I'm eating over the sink. I'm not going to
Speaker 3: dirty dish. I just want to eat everything over the sink.
Speaker 3: I have a trough that can just rinse out with
Speaker 3: a hose or something like that.
Speaker 2: Or that's not a bad IDEA dinner table with two
Speaker 2: troughs just running down the parallel and everyone eats over
Speaker 2: this trough.
Speaker 3: A bunch of pigs that live down there, or like
Speaker 3: you know, some glady.
Speaker 2: That feels like a crawdad baked sort of thing. It's
Speaker 2: kind of messy. You throw plastic on the table. Newspaper, newspaper, right,
Speaker 2: it's the tradition, that's okay. I like to contribute to problems,
Speaker 2: so I'm putting plastic on everything. Just filling the ocean
Speaker 2: with junk. Rinsing dishes before putting them in the dishwasher
Speaker 2: is a curse you. I mean, first of all, why
Speaker 2: do I even have the dishwasher?
Speaker 3: Yeah, blast that away for me.
Speaker 2: I mean, I'm sure someone probably tell me it's gonna
Speaker 2: break the dishwasher. But Jim, my boyfriend, and I often
Speaker 2: fight about this and I I've probably just made this up.
Speaker 2: But I think the dishwasher can tell if. I mean,
Speaker 2: I know that.
Speaker 3: I'm just saying that.
Speaker 2: ALLOWED just horrified that I even think this has some
Speaker 2: type of sensors, thinking like lasers shooting through the dishwasher
Speaker 2: to tell if there are crumbs on your plate.
Speaker 3: I mean, it's gonna do what. It doesn't matter what
Speaker 3: right it has it have a trap down there that
Speaker 3: you can just you can the trip down there, fish
Speaker 3: out the Yeah.
Speaker 2: I mean, I mean, if I begin rinsing the dishes,
Speaker 2: I might as well just wash them.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's like it's a slippery slope. It's literally a slippery.
Speaker 2: Wet and wild slope. Okay, we got two out of three.
Speaker 3: That's pretty good. I like that. Not bad? Was that
Speaker 3: sixty six percent? Sixty six? Six point six?
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think it's the kind of an endless sixes right, Yeah,
Speaker 2: probably not endless, but well it is right, Yeah, I
Speaker 2: don't think. I mean, once you get to that final
Speaker 2: little crumb, it's almost non existent.
Speaker 3: The Greeks just couldn't figure it out.
Speaker 2: They couldn't give us a better number system. Okay, time
Speaker 2: for the final segment of the podcast. This is called
Speaker 2: I said no emails people listeners who are desperate. Right
Speaker 2: into the podcast, they are begging for answers. Did I
Speaker 2: say the email? I said, no gifts at gmail dot com.
Speaker 2: We hope me answer a question.
Speaker 3: Love you.
Speaker 2: Okay, this says mister Weineger and guest. That's very formal, uncomfortable. Hello.
Speaker 2: I very much enjoy listening to your podcast and especially
Speaker 2: respect your wise advice. Okay, although my situation does not
Speaker 2: relate to gifts, I'm hoping you can still provide some assistance.
Speaker 2: Several years ago, I had a group of friends who
Speaker 2: would meet weekly at a bar for trivia.
Speaker 3: Nights and chit chat.
Speaker 2: Eventually, we became less interested in the trivia and more
Speaker 2: interested in catching up, so it made more sense to
Speaker 2: gather at someone's home instead of the trivia night. We
Speaker 2: have several paragraphs to go wow, Okay, maybe just too.
Speaker 2: I ended up as the usual host along with my
Speaker 2: roommate for these gatherings, as my apartment was the most
Speaker 2: central and best set up for a game night or hang.
Speaker 2: I am happy to share any snacks, drinks, anything else
Speaker 2: in my home with my friends, although after a significant
Speaker 2: period of time of hosting these weekly gatherings, there have
Speaker 2: been several weeks where my life has been too hectic
Speaker 2: for trips to the grocery store in order to have
Speaker 2: things on hand for my friends to enjoy. Although I
Speaker 2: almost always have some kind of fruit or granola bars
Speaker 2: on hand, that's not a great snack. One of my friends,
Speaker 2: who has attended nearly all of these gatherings, has started
Speaker 2: making jokes about my poor hosting abilities because I don't
Speaker 2: have a selection of snacks and drinks they are interested
Speaker 2: in having. Normally, I would brush this off as friendly teasing,
Speaker 2: but after she has made this joke a dozen times.
Speaker 2: I started to get a little bit irritated, seeing as
Speaker 2: she has never once offered to bring snacks or drinks
Speaker 2: after nearly two years of these events, or even offered
Speaker 2: to host. Additionally, anytime I suggested we meet at a
Speaker 2: restaurant for dinner instead, this same friend objects to the
Speaker 2: cost of eating out as opposed to the food and
Speaker 2: drinks at my home, which appear by magic. This person's furious.
Speaker 2: My question, thanks for bearing with me, You're welcome. Is
Speaker 2: my friend right that it's bad hosting not to have
Speaker 2: snacks on hand? Am I being dramatic to be bothered
Speaker 2: by this? Is my friend being a disrespectful guest? I
Speaker 2: look forward to your perspective, and that just says from
Speaker 2: a fan. They won't even put their name on.
Speaker 3: This email such you know it's going to get back to.
Speaker 2: Yes, this friend is going to be furious.
Speaker 3: I think that's disrespectful. You think that's disrespectful the dispectful guest? Yes,
Speaker 3: I mean from my perspective, but they didn't say I
Speaker 3: said no snacks, so if it was that right to right?
Speaker 2: I mean, from what I'm seeing here, this host is
Speaker 2: a horrible host. They keep luring people into their trap
Speaker 2: and refusing to go to the grocery store, making up excuses. Yeah,
Speaker 2: granola bars. They're just rummaging through the cupboard, so I've
Speaker 2: got some granola bars. Well, they're able to continue buying
Speaker 2: granola bars. Why are they able to buy some chips.
Speaker 3: I think that it's good. I think it's a two
Speaker 3: way street where if you're a good host, it makes
Speaker 3: people want to be a good guest. But I think
Speaker 3: some people don't know that you cannot show up empty
Speaker 3: hand into someone's house. This person is bringing nothing. You
Speaker 3: have to always bring at least something.
Speaker 2: But what if this person is obviously in need?
Speaker 3: I don't know. I mean, is putting down someone in need?
Speaker 3: Are they? Though? I think it might just be a
Speaker 3: cheap skate. It might just be a cheapy because I
Speaker 3: think that a lot of times if you host, if
Speaker 3: you host enough, you end up getting too much stuff
Speaker 3: because people bring stuff. You're in fact these covers, beers
Speaker 3: and stuff. People bring things. I think the problem with
Speaker 3: this this event has become too informal.
Speaker 2: Oh interesting because.
Speaker 3: Recent that this person, this guest, has taking it for granted.
Speaker 2: So that maybe you send out like a paper invitation
Speaker 2: to the next event. The host is obviously addicted to hosting,
Speaker 2: and it's it's causing problems. They're not able to host
Speaker 2: an actual event because all they care about is the
Speaker 2: hosting itself. And they're not going to the grocery store. Sad,
Speaker 2: And now they're blaming their friends. I mean, obviously all
Speaker 2: of their friends are off. Well if they're not bringing anything,
Speaker 2: they're singling out this one person, but what about the
Speaker 2: rest of the group bring something. This fan whatever their
Speaker 2: name is, needs to call out all of them in
Speaker 2: their next email.
Speaker 3: Also seems like a personal thing that's going on between
Speaker 3: these two individuals.
Speaker 2: Right, maybe maybe there's a bigger problem.
Speaker 3: Yeah, like they needed to talk. They didn't have a
Speaker 3: I had to have. They didn't have a can sell you.
Speaker 2: For a second at the next event. Yeah, because you're
Speaker 2: in the kitchen for just one for a.
Speaker 3: Second, and then the camera person goes with them.
Speaker 2: And then you hear some very loud whispering, right, just
Speaker 2: hissing it. Okay, well, stop posting parties, cut this person
Speaker 2: out of your life, obviously, go to the grocery store.
Speaker 2: Who knows what this person's even eating at home? Yeah,
Speaker 2: maybe they're just hungry, and it's affecting everything in their life.
Speaker 3: It's too complicated. There's a lot of personal issues that
Speaker 3: came through there that I feel.
Speaker 2: Like, you know, they're kind of dumping on us. Yeah,
Speaker 2: they're so busy, yet they have time to get online
Speaker 2: and type out a seventy five page email. That's always
Speaker 2: kind of the thing. It's like, your life is so bad, listener,
Speaker 2: you have an email address and an internet connection and
Speaker 2: all the time in the world. Solve your own problems.
Speaker 3: Figure it out.
Speaker 2: Figure it out. Don't write back in again, fan, figure
Speaker 2: it out.
Speaker 3: Speak to this person. Speak to it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe the relationship will deepen, and maybe the listener
Speaker 2: will bring something next time, and then you can complain
Speaker 2: about that, throw in their face. Yeah, there we go,
Speaker 2: set them up.
Speaker 3: I always think of that episode of Northern Exposure where
Speaker 3: Mandy Patinkin complained about the dinner party the Joel hosted.
Speaker 2: What happens?
Speaker 3: He just says something like, you could have at least
Speaker 3: clarified the butter.
Speaker 2: That's a very Mandy line.
Speaker 3: Yeah. The fact that it stuck in my head all
Speaker 3: these years is insane, Like it's absolute madness that I
Speaker 3: remember that.
Speaker 2: If Mandy came into my home and complained about what
Speaker 2: I made lipped the table.
Speaker 3: Also, his name is Mandy Patinka, Like, how do you
Speaker 3: get that name that?
Speaker 2: It's the name of a wonderful elf.
Speaker 3: It's hi and Manny Patinka. I'm reading for the role
Speaker 3: of Jim Stevens and I am five ten and look
Speaker 3: at it in New York City.
Speaker 2: Is Mandy short for something?
Speaker 3: I don't know?
Speaker 2: It's gotta be Mandel. Oh, okay, that makes sense, Mandel,
Speaker 2: Mandel Mandy.
Speaker 3: But also I don't know anyone named Mandel. I don't
Speaker 3: never named Mandel or Mandy last name, but not a
Speaker 3: first name, right, Mandel Mandal.
Speaker 2: His parents were doing something there and then they weren't
Speaker 2: even happy with it, and they started calling him Mandy. Well, Mandy,
Speaker 2: we love you, we do. Don't complain at my dinner party.
Speaker 2: We answered the question perfectly. Did I now have my
Speaker 2: hand truck which is going to, you know, be with
Speaker 2: me probably for the rest of my life?
Speaker 3: That thing, It's crazy how how long that thing will last?
Speaker 2: Right? I feel like this is a like you buy
Speaker 2: one and that's it.
Speaker 3: I thought it was going to break forever ago, but
Speaker 3: it still persists, and I abuse that thing.
Speaker 2: I really do to get something helpful on this podcast.
Speaker 2: I mean, one in a million, this is maybe one
Speaker 2: of four things I've gotten on this or I'm like,
Speaker 2: that will improve my life.
Speaker 3: Nice. I wasn't sure you know something. You might have
Speaker 3: no use for it whatsoever. But it's still in its
Speaker 3: original packaging.
Speaker 2: I mean, it's a brand new hand truck. Who could
Speaker 2: ask for more? And you don't know you need a
Speaker 2: hand truck until you do. Yeah, and then you're not
Speaker 2: going to go buy one, and so you're trying to
Speaker 2: lift it by yourself, freaking out.
Speaker 3: And you can stow it. You can stow it.
Speaker 2: Look how it folds up. I can take this on
Speaker 2: a plane.
Speaker 3: You could take it on a plane if you had
Speaker 3: to travel with your wares.
Speaker 2: Just kind of fold my clothes and set them on
Speaker 2: top of it and drag it through the air.
Speaker 3: I'm kind of cool.
Speaker 2: Actually that's not a bad idea. Yeah, I mean it's
Speaker 2: a horrible idea. But Johnny, thank you so much for being.
Speaker 3: Thank you for having me. It was wonderful to be such.
Speaker 2: A wonderful time to have you looking up my plants.
Speaker 1: In this Uh.
Speaker 3: I think this is more of a hotel.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think we should settle on this.
Speaker 3: This is a hotel patio.
Speaker 2: Ultimately, this is glamping. It is I think we've been glamping.
Speaker 3: It is listener.
Speaker 2: The podcast is over. It's just absolutely over, and you
Speaker 2: have to do something else. I love you, goodbye, I said,
Speaker 2: No Gifts is an exactly right production. It's produced by
Speaker 2: our dear friend Analise Nilson, and it's beautifully mixed by
Speaker 2: Ben Holliday. And we couldn't do it without our guest booker,
Speaker 2: Patrick Kottner. The theme song, of course, could only come
Speaker 2: from miracle worker Amy Mann. You must follow the show
Speaker 2: on Instagram at I said no gifts. I don't want
Speaker 2: to hear any excuses. That's where you get to see
Speaker 2: pictures of all these gorgeous gifts I'm getting. And don't
Speaker 2: you want to see pictures of the gifts?
Speaker 1: Ivy did you hear? Funa man myself perfectly clear. But
Speaker 1: you're a guess to my home. You gotta come to
Speaker 1: me empty And I said, no guests, you're a presences
Speaker 1: presents enough I already had too much stuff, So how
Speaker 1: do you dare to surbey me