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Speaker 1: How do everybody. Welcome to the Grangersmith podcast. Thank you

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Speaker 1: for watching and listening. I wanted to talk to you

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Speaker 1: about eee nation dot com. I don't know if y'all

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Speaker 1: have heard of me talk about this yet. It's pretty new,

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Speaker 1: but we built a website called yee enation dot com

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Speaker 1: just for you, and you can come. You could become

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Speaker 1: a member, and we were releasing exclusive content on this

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Speaker 1: website for members only. For instance, we just put up

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Speaker 1: a documentary that some of you might remember that was

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Speaker 1: hard copy only. It was not anywhere on the internet.

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Speaker 1: We put it out in twenty thirteen. It was produced

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Speaker 1: by my videographer Paul, who still does these podcasts. He's

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Speaker 1: been with me for the last seven years. And this

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Speaker 1: was the first national tour we ever took. And we

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Speaker 1: were with Paul and we went out and we had

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Speaker 1: this crazy adventure. I got in a kind of a

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Speaker 1: fight with my sound guy out of good fun, lost

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Speaker 1: my voice through a burst blood vessel on my vocal cord.

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Speaker 1: A lot of crazy stuff happened. Anyway, it's on this

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Speaker 1: documentary that we've released for the first time ever on

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Speaker 1: ye enation dot com. We're also with this membership, you

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Speaker 1: can get merch discounts at ee apparel. You can get

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Speaker 1: early access to EEE apparel launches, which is actually a

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Speaker 1: big deal. So say we launch a big fall launch,

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Speaker 1: for example, or a winter launch at ten am, Well

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Speaker 1: you get access to that like twenty minutes early, so

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Speaker 1: you can go and get the items before they sell out.

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Speaker 1: That's a cool thing. You could get access to live

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Speaker 1: streams that me and Amber are gonna do periodically. We'll

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Speaker 1: go on there and be able to answer your questions.

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Speaker 1: Exclusive listens to new music, which is going to be

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Speaker 1: a huge plus for ye enation dot com. So, for instance,

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Speaker 1: we have Volume two coming out at the end of November,

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Speaker 1: Country Things Volume two, and I will be going on

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Speaker 1: yee enation dot com and playing these songs early before

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Speaker 1: anyone gets to hear them from members only. And then

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Speaker 1: also we're going to be playing live songs, so like,

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Speaker 1: for instance, this Friday, me and Todd are getting together

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Speaker 1: and we're gonna play some songs, make a bonfire, play

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Speaker 1: some music and record it and put it on yee

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Speaker 1: nah dot com exclusive to members only. So so excited

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Speaker 1: about that is brand new and it's just the very

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Speaker 1: beginning of what we could be capable of doing with

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Speaker 1: this custom website to you guys. Of course I have

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Speaker 1: to talk about EE Apparel and I have to talk

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Speaker 1: about a Shirt of the Month club, which is I

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Speaker 1: think the coolest thing we do at Eye Apparel. We

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Speaker 1: do a lot of stuff here at the Yegee Farm,

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Speaker 1: but Shirt of the Month Club's got to be the coolest.

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Speaker 1: You just sign up and once you remember, you get

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Speaker 1: a T shirt the first of every month. This is

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Speaker 1: an exclusive shirt that we don't sell anywhere else. You

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Speaker 1: can't find it anywhere else. In fact, you don't even

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Speaker 1: know what it is. You just give us your size,

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Speaker 1: and first of the month, you forget about it. You

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Speaker 1: open the mailbox and there is your brand new EE

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Speaker 1: Apparel shirt. We design them all, me and my brothers,

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Speaker 1: and probably more proud of those than any other shirts.

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Speaker 1: In fact, I wish I was wearing this is a

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Speaker 1: couple months ago, but I wish I was wearing the

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Speaker 1: one from this month because it's probably my favorite shirt

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Speaker 1: we've ever done. Continue to send me your questions, which

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Speaker 1: is what I'm going to do today at Grangersmith Podcast

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Speaker 1: at gmail dot com. Ask me anything and I'll sit

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Speaker 1: here on this podcast and read them off the cuff,

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Speaker 1: no notes, no preparation, as if we're sitting in the

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Speaker 1: living room together. And I think that's been such a

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Speaker 1: cool thing to do on this podcast. And I'm want

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Speaker 1: to give a shout out to all the people and

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Speaker 1: the different professions that I know listen to this on

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Speaker 1: Monday mornings other whether you're a trucker or a power

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Speaker 1: plant worker, or a teacher, or you're sitting in traffic

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Speaker 1: on your commute to work, whatever you might be doing.

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Speaker 1: I know people listen to it in the tractor and

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Speaker 1: when they're in the field in the mornings. I try

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Speaker 1: to make it where this podcast could really be heard

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Speaker 1: and consumed by all walks of life, and that's what

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Speaker 1: makes it fun for me and makes it meaningful for me,

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Speaker 1: makes me feel like I have a purpose. So thank

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Speaker 1: you for listening today. Subscribe it. Whatever platform you're using

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Speaker 1: for this podcast, Please subscribe and tell a friend. That's

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Speaker 1: how we could spread it. We could spread the message,

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Speaker 1: and I could continue to make these and continue to

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Speaker 1: produce them at the best quality I know possible. So

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Speaker 1: this is gonna be a good one. Welcome to the

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Speaker 1: Granger Smith Podcast. Ye did chant in d Times and

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Speaker 1: Long Line bifle of up and down on back crazy

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Speaker 1: evag gation. That song you just heard. I get so

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Speaker 1: many requests from that song that people say, where can

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Speaker 1: I find that song? The song at the intro of

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Speaker 1: the podcast, And to be honest with you, it really

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Speaker 1: doesn't exist right now anywhere but this podcast. And it

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Speaker 1: used to be a show intro to our live concerts,

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Speaker 1: and it ended up being when we stopped using it

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Speaker 1: and switched to another one that became the intro to

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Speaker 1: this podcast. So I don't know how to answer that

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Speaker 1: question on where do I find that song? You could

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Speaker 1: listen to it right here all you want. You could

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Speaker 1: keep rewinding the podcast over and over, or what do

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Speaker 1: you want? What do you guys want? Comment below? If

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Speaker 1: you want me to release that as a digital maybe

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Speaker 1: I'll put it on YouTube and just stream it as

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Speaker 1: a song itself. I could do that. Maybe I'll do

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Speaker 1: that that way. When people ask that question, I'll say, yeah,

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Speaker 1: linkin description, here's that song. But there's really I write

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Speaker 1: these kind of songs for intros, and there's really no

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Speaker 1: more to it than dip cans and diesel mud tis.

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Speaker 1: There's not much more to it than that. I just

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Speaker 1: wanted to have a song for Yege Nation. Speaking of songs,

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Speaker 1: I'm holding if you're watching on YouTube, I'm holding the

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Speaker 1: physical copy of Country Things. So what happens is Country

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Speaker 1: Things Volume one is out, Thank you guys for listening

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Speaker 1: to that. And Country Things Volume two comes out November

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Speaker 1: twenty seventh. And when it comes out. When Volume two

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Speaker 1: comes out, it becomes one project. So the volumes go away,

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Speaker 1: it becomes the toll, all the songs mixed in together.

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Speaker 1: You get the CD and we'll have it on vinyl.

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Speaker 1: All that will be coming out in November. So if

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Speaker 1: you like to hold a CD like I do and

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Speaker 1: fill that physical copy, you're gonna get that in November.

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Speaker 1: You'll be able to get it off. So I want

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Speaker 1: to dig into these questions with you guys, and my

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Speaker 1: question list here is getting longer and longer because I

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Speaker 1: don't answer them as fast as you guys send them.

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Speaker 1: But I encourage you to go to your email Grangersmith

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Speaker 1: Podcast at gmail dot com ask me anything and I'll

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Speaker 1: work my way through it. And I know that these

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Speaker 1: questions are all over the map, and I really enjoy

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Speaker 1: this and I really I'm grateful that you guys are

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Speaker 1: trusting me with some really personal stuff. That's what it

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Speaker 1: is today too, Just get into more and more personal stuff.

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Speaker 1: Some of it's light, hut hearted, some of it is

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Speaker 1: super deep. I'll try my best with all of it.

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Speaker 1: Like I said, as if we're sitting in the living

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Speaker 1: room together, sitting in the truck and talking as friends.

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Speaker 1: So let me scroll a little bit. And this question

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Speaker 1: is from Adam from Minnesota. He says, Hi, Granger, with

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Speaker 1: all the miles that you put on touring, have you

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Speaker 1: ever had mechanical breakdowns that prevented making a show? What

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Speaker 1: sort of a contingency plan is there if a bus

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Speaker 1: goes down. I've always been impressed by the logistics of

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Speaker 1: touring musicians and the equipment used. That's a great question, Adam.

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Speaker 1: Thank you for having the foresight to even think that

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Speaker 1: you could show up at a concert and all of

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Speaker 1: this equipment is there, and the band is there and

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Speaker 1: the crew is there, and they're putting on this show.

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Speaker 1: And most people don't think, Hey, weren't they in Indianapolis

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Speaker 1: last night? And aren't they in Baltimore tomorrow? And that's

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Speaker 1: our lives and so much of our touring is moving

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Speaker 1: a bunch of heavy stuff from one place to the

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Speaker 1: next and setting it all up and then tearing it

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Speaker 1: all down that night, putting it back in a trailer

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Speaker 1: or a truck and moving it five or six hundred

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Speaker 1: miles to another city, and doing it all again the

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Speaker 1: next day. That is, it's logistical nightmares a lot of times,

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Speaker 1: and a lot of that falls on either my lead driver,

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Speaker 1: Bull or my tour manager Chris, and those guys. They

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Speaker 1: go through a lot to make sure that the shows happen.

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Speaker 1: And when I say a lot, I mean planning out

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Speaker 1: fuel stops, planning out when the load in time, when

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Speaker 1: arrival time is, when departure time is, making sure that

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Speaker 1: the mileage in between those two stops may even make sense.

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Speaker 1: Can you even go six hundred and fifty miles with

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Speaker 1: knowing that you're going to stop this night at this

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Speaker 1: time and you need to be at the next location

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Speaker 1: at this time. Can it even happen? So a lot

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Speaker 1: of planning goes into these tours before we even leave

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Speaker 1: the EE Farm. I want to help you ad them

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Speaker 1: with that question because I have my two bus riders,

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Speaker 1: Butch and Bull have started a YouTube channel called Risky

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Speaker 1: Business with Butch and Bull, and they go through kind

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Speaker 1: of a lot of the mechanical stuff in the background

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Speaker 1: to their lives that you might not see. And I

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Speaker 1: think it's really cool and it's a cool channel. So

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Speaker 1: I encourage you to go support those guys and to

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Speaker 1: help answer your question even more, I mean the answers. Yes,

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Speaker 1: do we have mechanical breakdowns all the time. Every day.

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Speaker 1: It's a daily thing. Something's breaking down. I mean it

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Speaker 1: could It could be anything from the fuel line is

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Speaker 1: busted or a belt breaks, or it could be as

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Speaker 1: simple as we have no ac in the bunk room,

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Speaker 1: or the lights won't turn on in the back lounge,

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Speaker 1: the heater's broken in the driver's seat of the driver's cab,

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Speaker 1: the trailer lights don't come on, we blow a tire,

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Speaker 1: we have of an air leak, and the air tanks

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Speaker 1: for the bus, the airbags. There are so many things

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Speaker 1: to go wrong in a bus or truck and trailer

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Speaker 1: and tires on the big road that something's going to

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Speaker 1: happen just about every day. That's just logical statistics. But

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Speaker 1: we have never never knock on wood, never missed a

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Speaker 1: show because of a mechanical breakdown. In the sixteen years

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Speaker 1: that have been actively touring, we've had crazy times where

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Speaker 1: we've had to rent U haul trucks or U haul

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Speaker 1: vans and hop in vans and have a pickup truck

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Speaker 1: come and unhook the trailer, and pickup truck takes the

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Speaker 1: gear and we drive in a rental. We've most of

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Speaker 1: the time we travel on two buses, so a lot

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Speaker 1: of times if something really bad happens, we all jump

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Speaker 1: onto one bus and cram onto one us or more

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Speaker 1: often we limp our way to the venue, and then

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Speaker 1: butcher Bull deals with that bus. As soon as they

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Speaker 1: get there at say six o'clock in the morning, they

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Speaker 1: start dealing with that problem, calling local mechanic or tire

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Speaker 1: guy or electrician or plumber or whatever. And then the

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Speaker 1: local guy comes out, which is not always reliable. First

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Speaker 1: of all, they might be not open, the shop might

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Speaker 1: be on a Saturday, and the shops close on Saturday,

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Speaker 1: so there's always some kind of adventure. We've been stuck

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Speaker 1: on the road. I know we took a Canadian trip

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Speaker 1: in twenty sixteen and my bus Wildflower was just, for

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Speaker 1: whatever reason, continuing to break down on that tour, so

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Speaker 1: we were stuck in like icy cold tundra night after night.

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Speaker 1: Something new was happening, and a lot of times it

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Speaker 1: has to do with Wildflower. In particular, it has to

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Speaker 1: do with the government emissions that we had that are installed,

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Speaker 1: whether that's a in the big diesel trucks that's a

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Speaker 1: regeneration system that helps the exhaust emissions, or it tries

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Speaker 1: to dilute them and it just really hampers the engines,

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Speaker 1: and so that seems to be a problem. But these

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Speaker 1: guys always find a way to use baling wire and

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Speaker 1: duct tape to get us back down the road. And

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Speaker 1: luckily we've never missed a show because of mechanical problems.

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Speaker 1: The only time that I actually came close, really close

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Speaker 1: to missing a show had nothing to do with the

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Speaker 1: bus is it was a fly date, which means we

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Speaker 1: all are on an airplane, and I was stuck in

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Speaker 1: DFW on American Airlines with maintenance problems on their plane,

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Speaker 1: and I didn't get to the show until an hour

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Speaker 1: after it was supposed to start. Luckily, the band was

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Speaker 1: already there. They beat me there, and I came in

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Speaker 1: late and the band was just playing cover songs in

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Speaker 1: Colorado Springs, Colorado when I showed up and took over.

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Speaker 1: So that's the really the closest it's ever been, and

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Speaker 1: I would say that that's a pretty good chance that

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Speaker 1: if we're going to miss a show, it's because of

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Speaker 1: an airplane, not because of a bus. Thank you, Adam.

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Speaker 1: Good question man. This question is from Lindsay. She's from Michigan.

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Speaker 1: She says, Hey, Grangeer, I love your music and family.

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Speaker 1: I've seen you twice and I can't wait for concerts

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Speaker 1: to be back in full swing so I can come

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Speaker 1: out again. I lost my fiance to a fatal car

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Speaker 1: accident nine months ago. Out of respect for the other

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Speaker 1: family involved, I prefer not to say what the events

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Speaker 1: were leading up to this accident. I've been constantly told

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Speaker 1: I need to forgive the individual that was involved. I

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Speaker 1: have the head knowledge that I need to do this,

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Speaker 1: but my heart does not want to follow. My question

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Speaker 1: is you, as a man of faith, what is your

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Speaker 1: process that you go through and forgiving and how do

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Speaker 1: you know it's the right time to do so? Deep question, Lindsay.

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Speaker 1: Let me start by saying, I'm so sorry about your fearonce.

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Speaker 1: I can't imagine what you've gone through and what you

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Speaker 1: continue to go through over these last nine months. I'm

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Speaker 1: sure you had wedding plans and future plans and life plans,

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Speaker 1: and it probably feels like that's all been completely destroyed.

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Speaker 1: And my heart goes out to you, and I'm sure

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Speaker 1: everyone listening to this podcast really has empathy for you,

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Speaker 1: And I can imagine, on top of the grief of

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Speaker 1: losing your fiance, what that must be. On top of

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Speaker 1: that to deal with the anger that you have towards

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Speaker 1: the other party in the accident. And it is on

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Speaker 1: your heart that you need to forgive that individual, at

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Speaker 1: least you say that's what your your head says you

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Speaker 1: need to do, but your heart doesn't want to follow.

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Speaker 1: So so many of these questions, guys, I can't relate

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Speaker 1: to the question, but I can relate to being human

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Speaker 1: and the incredible suffering that we as humans continue to

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Speaker 1: involve ourselves in. That's just who we are as humans.

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Speaker 1: We suffer. We go through good times, and then bad

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Speaker 1: times follow, and we find ourselves back in a good time,

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Speaker 1: and then we're surprised by bad times again. My first

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Speaker 1: my first thought for you is it's it's been nine months.

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Speaker 1: Don't force yourself into thinking you need to find forgiveness

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Speaker 1: in order to find peace in your grieving in your mourning,

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Speaker 1: because I don't think those two things correlate right now,

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Speaker 1: and I think that they will happen in order as

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Speaker 1: you began to go through your grieving process and begin

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Speaker 1: to understand more, not about how it happened, but understand

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Speaker 1: more that it did happen, and this is your world now.

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Speaker 1: And that is one of the most painful things about

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Speaker 1: loss is realizing that this is your reality, that you

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Speaker 1: can't change it, that you didn't want it to happen,

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Speaker 1: that this is the worst nightmare, but it is your reality,

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Speaker 1: and you have a choice to accept that or deny it.

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Speaker 1: And with denying that reality, you're just foregoing the suffering.

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Speaker 1: And so at some point, and you might have already

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Speaker 1: done this, Lindsay, but at some point you got to say, Okay,

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Speaker 1: this is the hand I've been dealt, these are the

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Speaker 1: cards I have to play. I feel like I'm the

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Speaker 1: only one in the world that has lost a fiance

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Speaker 1: to a car accident. I feel like no one could

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Speaker 1: relate to me. I see my friends around me, getting married,

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Speaker 1: having babies, happy, they seem amazing. They In fact, when

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Speaker 1: I get a wedding invitation, I get mad, I get angry, jealous,

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Speaker 1: natural feelings that you might be thinking, lindsay, there's nothing

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Speaker 1: wrong with that, But it is up to you now

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Speaker 1: and you alone, to say this is where I am.

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Speaker 1: And I have to mention that if you're if you

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Speaker 1: are a woman of faith, if you're a believer, then

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Speaker 1: so much of this is putting putting this back to

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Speaker 1: God and saying God, this is where this is where

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Speaker 1: you led me. And I hate it, but as a

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Speaker 1: servant of you, I'm accepting it as part of your

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Speaker 1: will because I know that that you you work all

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Speaker 1: things for good, and the crazy thing about working all

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Speaker 1: things for good is that all things mean good and bad,

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Speaker 1: and this is bad. So understanding that there's a lot

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Speaker 1: of peace in that that that you're you're submitting yourself

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Speaker 1: to God and his will and his plan as much

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Speaker 1: as you hate it, and it's okay. I think it's

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Speaker 1: okay to hate where your life has become. But that

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Speaker 1: doesn't mean you have to move forward with that hate.

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Speaker 1: It doesn't mean you have to look at tomorrow as

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Speaker 1: something that you hate, because you you can now control

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Speaker 1: this moment today. You don't have to like how you

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Speaker 1: got here, but you can control this today. And I

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Speaker 1: would put aside your compulsion to forgive this individual right now,

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Speaker 1: and along with that comes putting aside the desire to

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Speaker 1: hold a grudge or to be angry or to be upset.

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Speaker 1: I would say, think of it more in terms of

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Speaker 1: it happened, and you couldn't control it, no matter, no

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Speaker 1: matter what, this was the destiny of your fiance, and

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Speaker 1: this was the destiny of you, And this was the

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Speaker 1: destiny of the individual that you're struggling with right now.

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Speaker 1: Once again, I want to keep saying that I can't

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Speaker 1: imagine what you're going through. I'm not going to pretend

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Speaker 1: like I have an instant answer to tell you about

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Speaker 1: how to give. But what I can say is give

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Speaker 1: it time. Let your heart heal a little bit more,

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Speaker 1: Let let more months go by. In fact, you might

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Speaker 1: want to let years go by. And I got a feeling, Lindsey,

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Speaker 1: that you're gonna wake up when enough time is gone by.

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Speaker 1: You're gonna wake up and go I'm ready to forgive him.

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Speaker 1: And that will be an amazing day for you, because

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Speaker 1: you know your head wants to do it. So when

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Speaker 1: your heart agrees with your head and that moment happens

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Speaker 1: and you feel that forgiveness. You feel the ready for it,

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Speaker 1: then you're gonna you're gonna let out this sigh of relief.

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Speaker 1: Your heart's gonna slow down a little bit. You're gonna

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Speaker 1: open your palm and quit that closed fist anger that

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Speaker 1: you must be having. But that is not something you

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Speaker 1: need to force right now. It's not something that a

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Speaker 1: certain book will teach you to read or will teach

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Speaker 1: you how to do by reading it. You're going to

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Speaker 1: know when it's time. And I would encourage you to

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Speaker 1: pray about that and just say God, just like I mean,

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Speaker 1: just like your question God, all right. I am so

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Speaker 1: angry and I don't want to be angry, and I

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Speaker 1: want to forgive because I know you you forgive everyone,

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Speaker 1: and I want to forgive like you did, but I

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Speaker 1: don't know how. And I wish, I wish you could

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Speaker 1: put it in my heart to open it up and

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Speaker 1: to soften it because it's hard right now. And I

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Speaker 1: wish you could teach me how to open my heart

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Speaker 1: for forgiveness. And if you do that, I don't want

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Speaker 1: you to come back to this podcast. And I want

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Speaker 1: you to send me another email six months twelve months

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Speaker 1: from now and tell me what happened after you said

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Speaker 1: that with all your sincerity and come back to me

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Speaker 1: and then tell me how you feel then. And I

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Speaker 1: have a hunch that it's going to be different one

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Speaker 1: year from now, Lindsay, I got a feeling it's not

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Speaker 1: going You're not gonna have as heart of a heart anymore.

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Speaker 1: Good question. Thank you? All right, And this question is

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Speaker 1: from Caesar. He's in California, and he says, Hey, Grange,

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Speaker 1: your first time I met you was when you came

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Speaker 1: down here to the winery in San Martin, California in

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Speaker 1: twenty eighteen. I've had a tough time lately in the

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Speaker 1: love department, and my question to you is do you

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Speaker 1: believe in nice guys finish last? And if so or

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Speaker 1: if not, why? Caesar, thank you for writing buddy, thank

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Speaker 1: you for listening to this podcast. Thank you for Karen

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Speaker 1: enough to take this question to me. And I'm sorry

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Speaker 1: you've had a tough time in the in the love department, dude,

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Speaker 1: but I do not, by any means agree that nice

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Speaker 1: guys finished last. I know that that you know pop

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Speaker 1: culture and social media and might lead you to think

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Speaker 1: that you've got to be you got to be rude

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Speaker 1: and hard nosed and and cruel at some point, and

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Speaker 1: all about yourself, and you got to swoop in and

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Speaker 1: take what you want, you know. Uh, but but but

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Speaker 1: I have learned that. But by taking the high road,

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Speaker 1: which is based being a nice guy, taking the high

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Speaker 1: road is so much more rewarding. And what you're going

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Speaker 1: to do is you got to ask yourself, by being

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Speaker 1: an asshole, who who are you going to attract? What

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Speaker 1: kind of what kind of partner are you going to

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Speaker 1: attract by being an asshole? And that's that's the question

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Speaker 1: you've got to meditate on, my man. Because if you

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Speaker 1: are a nice guy and you're taking the high road,

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Speaker 1: and you're you're a man of integrity. You remember that

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Speaker 1: word integrity, that's a good one. Then what when you're

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Speaker 1: putting that out into the world that you're you're a

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Speaker 1: nice guy with integrity and you're taking the high road,

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Speaker 1: Think what think think of what you're attracting. You're attracting

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Speaker 1: a whole new level of girls, and that is much

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Speaker 1: more valuable in the long run for you in your

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Speaker 1: life than whatever relationship you just ended up in that

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Speaker 1: went wrong. Okay, that's my answer to that. I appreciate you, dude,

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Speaker 1: for writing in. I'm taking a quick break. Be right back.

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Speaker 1: If you guys want to ask a question for me,

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00:26:16,080 --> 00:26:20,080
Speaker 1: send it to Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. I

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00:26:20,080 --> 00:26:22,800
Speaker 1: will add it to the archive. I'm going off the cup.

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Speaker 1: I'm going to answer these questions for you guys as

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00:26:24,680 --> 00:26:27,960
Speaker 1: if we're sitting together in the truck having a chat,

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00:26:28,000 --> 00:26:30,240
Speaker 1: as if we're buddies. And I hope that you guys

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Speaker 1: feel that way, because I definitely feel that way about

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Speaker 1: you guys. And this next question comes from Matthew and

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Speaker 1: he says, Hey, Granger my name is Matthew. I'm from Flint, Michigan.

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Speaker 1: Shout out to Flint, Michigan. I just want to let

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Speaker 1: you know that I'm new to the Ee family. Country

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Speaker 1: music is not something that I grew up with. I

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Speaker 1: didn't even listen to it that much until I heard

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Speaker 1: you only a few months ago. I'm a truck driver,

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Speaker 1: so I heard the occasional country tune and the truck

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Speaker 1: stop or rolling down the interstate where we were when

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Speaker 1: there were no other stations to listen to. I just

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Speaker 1: wanted to tell you I appreciate the music as a

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Speaker 1: man that loves his country, his freedom, and for the

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Speaker 1: stories you tell on the YouTube channel and podcast. I

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Speaker 1: just watched the episode when your brother with you and

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Speaker 1: your brother and just had a flood of emotions come

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Speaker 1: back to me as I heard you talk about showing

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Speaker 1: up to the venues and nobody being there, or playing

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Speaker 1: to the bartender and just the bouncer. I wrote and

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00:27:24,520 --> 00:27:28,679
Speaker 1: performed my crazy band of music with my friend and

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00:27:28,920 --> 00:27:33,359
Speaker 1: a group that we called Frantic Minds for close to

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Speaker 1: ten years. We drove those miles, played those shows, sometimes

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Speaker 1: on stage for no one but ourselves. Sometimes I appreciate

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Speaker 1: the struggle, and I'm so happy it paid off for you,

431
00:27:44,920 --> 00:27:48,000
Speaker 1: unlike it did for me. I really don't have a

432
00:27:48,080 --> 00:27:50,280
Speaker 1: question in here other than was there any point you

433
00:27:50,320 --> 00:27:53,040
Speaker 1: gave up on music, maybe to get a real job,

434
00:27:53,240 --> 00:27:56,840
Speaker 1: Because sometimes I regret it. It feels like there's something left,

435
00:27:57,080 --> 00:28:00,359
Speaker 1: something I didn't accomplish, something I set out to do.

436
00:28:00,000 --> 00:28:02,760
Speaker 1: Don't get me wrong, now I appreciate everything the road

437
00:28:02,800 --> 00:28:04,720
Speaker 1: has given me, even though in the beginning I hated

438
00:28:04,760 --> 00:28:08,080
Speaker 1: truck driving. But now I have a nice SUV, I

439
00:28:08,160 --> 00:28:10,280
Speaker 1: just bought a house, I have two dogs, and I'm

440
00:28:10,560 --> 00:28:14,360
Speaker 1: starting to be happy. I just always wonder, how could

441
00:28:14,400 --> 00:28:17,200
Speaker 1: it have been if I was in the passenger seat

442
00:28:17,240 --> 00:28:20,119
Speaker 1: of the bus and not the driver. I've struggled with

443
00:28:20,160 --> 00:28:23,560
Speaker 1: this for years. It honestly depressed me. And to make

444
00:28:23,600 --> 00:28:26,160
Speaker 1: it worse, a friend up here, and more importantly, someone

445
00:28:26,160 --> 00:28:28,840
Speaker 1: I considered a brother, did find his way to the

446
00:28:28,840 --> 00:28:32,359
Speaker 1: spotlight and have success in music. Instead of being happy

447
00:28:32,400 --> 00:28:37,600
Speaker 1: for him, I was angry that it wasn't me. I

448
00:28:37,640 --> 00:28:40,160
Speaker 1: really just had to work and work and work at it,

449
00:28:40,200 --> 00:28:43,440
Speaker 1: maybe four or five years ago, and somehow I set

450
00:28:43,480 --> 00:28:46,760
Speaker 1: aside that fear and anger and regret, and now I

451
00:28:46,800 --> 00:28:49,360
Speaker 1: think I'm a better person for it. Perhaps it wasn't

452
00:28:49,360 --> 00:28:51,720
Speaker 1: in God's plan for me. I still have that urge

453
00:28:51,760 --> 00:28:54,360
Speaker 1: to perform now and then that how you get when

454
00:28:54,720 --> 00:28:57,600
Speaker 1: someone knows the lyrics to your song is like nothing else.

455
00:28:58,000 --> 00:29:00,560
Speaker 1: Maybe if Earl Divilis Junior is looking to do a

456
00:29:00,600 --> 00:29:05,080
Speaker 1: side project, I'm available. We can call it Cornfields and Crosswalks.

457
00:29:05,120 --> 00:29:07,160
Speaker 1: Either way, I'm a fan and I just have to

458
00:29:07,200 --> 00:29:10,680
Speaker 1: say thank you for what you do, family, God Country All. First,

459
00:29:10,720 --> 00:29:12,680
Speaker 1: I appreciate the messaging. If you ever head back to

460
00:29:12,720 --> 00:29:15,560
Speaker 1: the machine shop, I'll come check it out, maybe bring

461
00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:20,960
Speaker 1: you some Big John's. I appreciate that. Matthew, thank you

462
00:29:21,040 --> 00:29:24,880
Speaker 1: for thank you for listening, and I knew we had

463
00:29:24,920 --> 00:29:29,280
Speaker 1: truckers out there that listen to this. And a huge

464
00:29:29,320 --> 00:29:33,120
Speaker 1: shout out to Michigan. It's an important important place for

465
00:29:33,200 --> 00:29:38,240
Speaker 1: me and those The people in Michigan took me into

466
00:29:38,320 --> 00:29:42,880
Speaker 1: their family early on before a lot of other states

467
00:29:42,920 --> 00:29:45,200
Speaker 1: in the United States did so. I always have a

468
00:29:45,240 --> 00:29:47,680
Speaker 1: special place in my heart from Michigan, and I love

469
00:29:48,480 --> 00:29:54,000
Speaker 1: Big John's Sandwiches in Flint, Michigan. I want to start

470
00:29:54,080 --> 00:30:02,320
Speaker 1: by saying, you have appeared to have worked out most

471
00:30:02,360 --> 00:30:05,440
Speaker 1: of the problems that you ask me and your question

472
00:30:08,160 --> 00:30:14,280
Speaker 1: and what's awesome about about asking these questions and you

473
00:30:14,320 --> 00:30:17,320
Speaker 1: guys are typing them on emails. Sometimes I notice that

474
00:30:17,360 --> 00:30:19,880
Speaker 1: you work out the problem while you're typing it, and

475
00:30:19,920 --> 00:30:23,600
Speaker 1: that is therapy in itself. And I can almost encourage

476
00:30:23,600 --> 00:30:29,480
Speaker 1: everyone to better themselves by keeping some kind of daily journal.

477
00:30:30,600 --> 00:30:32,880
Speaker 1: And I don't want to say the word diary because

478
00:30:32,880 --> 00:30:36,000
Speaker 1: it starts sounding like you know a nine year old

479
00:30:36,000 --> 00:30:38,040
Speaker 1: girl that keeps a diary under a pillow or something.

480
00:30:38,080 --> 00:30:42,600
Speaker 1: But there's a lot of therapy that comes out of

481
00:30:44,040 --> 00:30:46,080
Speaker 1: a daily journal, and I do that. I don't do

482
00:30:46,120 --> 00:30:48,640
Speaker 1: it every single day. I try to, but sometimes I forget,

483
00:30:49,280 --> 00:30:52,960
Speaker 1: But I have an app on my phone that keeps

484
00:30:53,040 --> 00:30:56,760
Speaker 1: track and it's like a daily little log. In fact,

485
00:30:56,800 --> 00:31:00,680
Speaker 1: I could look at he right here. It's called day one,

486
00:31:01,480 --> 00:31:06,120
Speaker 1: so it's called day one Journal, and it allows me

487
00:31:06,240 --> 00:31:08,440
Speaker 1: to type in what's going on, so I could just

488
00:31:08,560 --> 00:31:10,440
Speaker 1: I'm talking to myself, so I don't have to be formal.

489
00:31:10,480 --> 00:31:15,960
Speaker 1: I'm just like tired today, Amber's gone on a job.

490
00:31:16,880 --> 00:31:19,240
Speaker 1: I need to pick up the kids, heading to the farm.

491
00:31:19,800 --> 00:31:25,040
Speaker 1: Been crazy with radio interviews, excited about Friday Show, you know,

492
00:31:25,880 --> 00:31:28,000
Speaker 1: and then years from now I can look back on

493
00:31:28,040 --> 00:31:30,520
Speaker 1: that and see where I was and when I was doing.

494
00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:32,480
Speaker 1: But there's a lot of therapy and just typing that out.

495
00:31:33,200 --> 00:31:36,640
Speaker 1: And you have done that, Matthew a little bit. But

496
00:31:36,840 --> 00:31:39,040
Speaker 1: let me help you with the music part of it.

497
00:31:39,560 --> 00:31:45,880
Speaker 1: And it's difficult for me to say these things because

498
00:31:46,120 --> 00:31:49,680
Speaker 1: you might not believe it coming from me, since I

499
00:31:49,760 --> 00:31:52,320
Speaker 1: do music for a living. But I'm here to tell

500
00:31:52,360 --> 00:31:58,320
Speaker 1: you that whatever you do in your life, you cannot

501
00:31:58,400 --> 00:32:04,959
Speaker 1: tie your happiness to the status of your success in

502
00:32:05,000 --> 00:32:09,000
Speaker 1: your career at all. It never works. If you read

503
00:32:09,080 --> 00:32:12,440
Speaker 1: anything in history, it has never worked. No one has,

504
00:32:13,240 --> 00:32:17,640
Speaker 1: no human has ever said, well, I wanted to make

505
00:32:17,680 --> 00:32:20,560
Speaker 1: it to regional manager because I knew that would make

506
00:32:20,560 --> 00:32:22,840
Speaker 1: me happy. And then I got to regional manager and

507
00:32:22,880 --> 00:32:26,160
Speaker 1: I was like, boom, there, I'm happy. That's exactly right now.

508
00:32:26,120 --> 00:32:28,040
Speaker 1: And now I'm just I'm happy in my whole life.

509
00:32:28,240 --> 00:32:30,440
Speaker 1: I got to regional manager, I've been here for the

510
00:32:30,520 --> 00:32:33,560
Speaker 1: last eight years. Then I'm just, man, I'm just satisfied

511
00:32:33,560 --> 00:32:36,360
Speaker 1: and I'm happy. No one has ever said that. And

512
00:32:36,400 --> 00:32:39,040
Speaker 1: guess what it goes with the music visits too. If

513
00:32:39,040 --> 00:32:41,640
Speaker 1: I could just get a gig where people come and

514
00:32:41,720 --> 00:32:44,600
Speaker 1: stand on the front row, then I'd be happy. Oh

515
00:32:44,680 --> 00:32:47,640
Speaker 1: if I could just get a bus, a bus, a bus.

516
00:32:47,640 --> 00:32:50,000
Speaker 1: I get all this crappy van and get it to

517
00:32:50,040 --> 00:32:52,840
Speaker 1: a bus, and then I'll be happy. Oh no, it's

518
00:32:52,880 --> 00:32:55,160
Speaker 1: got to be a record deal. I bet you. I

519
00:32:55,200 --> 00:32:57,960
Speaker 1: guarantee you. Once I get that record deal, things will

520
00:32:58,000 --> 00:33:01,640
Speaker 1: be easier. I'll be happy. I'll finally be Okay. I

521
00:33:01,640 --> 00:33:03,320
Speaker 1: have a record deal, I have a bus, I have

522
00:33:03,360 --> 00:33:04,959
Speaker 1: people come to my show. It's got to be a

523
00:33:05,600 --> 00:33:07,680
Speaker 1: I know what it is, a number one song. If

524
00:33:07,680 --> 00:33:09,680
Speaker 1: I can get a number one song, then I could

525
00:33:09,720 --> 00:33:13,000
Speaker 1: prove myself as an artist, and then I'll have more

526
00:33:13,000 --> 00:33:15,200
Speaker 1: people come to my shows and I'll have the record

527
00:33:15,280 --> 00:33:19,000
Speaker 1: deal and I will then be happy. You see the

528
00:33:19,040 --> 00:33:22,960
Speaker 1: pattern here. It just doesn't work. And like I said,

529
00:33:22,960 --> 00:33:25,240
Speaker 1: you might not believe me because here I am. I've

530
00:33:25,280 --> 00:33:29,320
Speaker 1: had those things, but I'm straight up telling you I'm

531
00:33:29,360 --> 00:33:34,040
Speaker 1: not happy because of those achievements. There has nothing to

532
00:33:34,080 --> 00:33:37,360
Speaker 1: do with it. It's always a grind. It's always a fight.

533
00:33:37,520 --> 00:33:41,080
Speaker 1: It's always a struggle, and you have to in a

534
00:33:41,120 --> 00:33:46,080
Speaker 1: way love that. You have to love the grind. You

535
00:33:46,080 --> 00:33:51,320
Speaker 1: have to love all the days in between. Everyone says

536
00:33:51,120 --> 00:33:53,920
Speaker 1: it's about the journey, not the destination. That is so true.

537
00:33:53,960 --> 00:33:57,400
Speaker 1: It's the journey you gotta love. And you're a driver.

538
00:33:58,800 --> 00:34:01,920
Speaker 1: You can't tie your happiness as a truck driver to

539
00:34:02,080 --> 00:34:05,400
Speaker 1: the drop, right. You got to tie it to man,

540
00:34:05,600 --> 00:34:07,280
Speaker 1: I love trucking. Why do you love it? No? One

541
00:34:07,320 --> 00:34:09,000
Speaker 1: says I love it because I love it when it

542
00:34:09,200 --> 00:34:11,960
Speaker 1: I get to the dock and I finally get to unload. No,

543
00:34:12,560 --> 00:34:16,640
Speaker 1: you have to love it for every mile and the

544
00:34:17,400 --> 00:34:20,440
Speaker 1: hot cup of coffee and the radio station, the Grangersmith

545
00:34:20,440 --> 00:34:23,719
Speaker 1: podcast that you're turning up in the cab, and the

546
00:34:23,760 --> 00:34:26,680
Speaker 1: new cities and the sunsets that you see heading west

547
00:34:26,880 --> 00:34:30,880
Speaker 1: on the interstate and the rainstorms and the rainbows that

548
00:34:30,920 --> 00:34:34,439
Speaker 1: no one else sees, and you have to find all

549
00:34:34,440 --> 00:34:39,120
Speaker 1: the little things on the journey. That's where the happiness is.

550
00:34:39,239 --> 00:34:42,560
Speaker 1: That's where the gratitude is. It's not in the destination.

551
00:34:43,000 --> 00:34:44,960
Speaker 1: And it's the same thing in the music business. And

552
00:34:45,000 --> 00:34:47,960
Speaker 1: I could straight up tell you one hundred and twenty

553
00:34:48,040 --> 00:34:53,720
Speaker 1: eight thousand percent, Matthew, that you, knowing you, you would

554
00:34:53,719 --> 00:34:58,600
Speaker 1: not have found happiness if you had continued music. And

555
00:34:59,000 --> 00:35:02,640
Speaker 1: your buddy who has you mentioned here, who has had success,

556
00:35:04,480 --> 00:35:07,000
Speaker 1: he doesn't have it either. And if he acts maybe

557
00:35:07,040 --> 00:35:08,799
Speaker 1: you see him on Instagram and he acts like he does,

558
00:35:08,880 --> 00:35:11,920
Speaker 1: he doesn't. Man, I promise you he's no different than you.

559
00:35:11,960 --> 00:35:14,279
Speaker 1: And I'm no different than you, and anyone else listening

560
00:35:14,280 --> 00:35:17,200
Speaker 1: to this podcast is no different than you. No one

561
00:35:17,280 --> 00:35:20,359
Speaker 1: listening right now on this podcast is saying, huh, well,

562
00:35:20,360 --> 00:35:22,799
Speaker 1: that's funny, because here I am, I'm just everything's great,

563
00:35:22,880 --> 00:35:25,680
Speaker 1: I'm happy. I can't complain about a single thing. I'm

564
00:35:25,760 --> 00:35:27,879
Speaker 1: right where I need to be, nowhere else I need

565
00:35:27,920 --> 00:35:30,040
Speaker 1: to go. This is exactly what I need to be doing.

566
00:35:30,080 --> 00:35:32,480
Speaker 1: And I'm just totally happy. And I've been this way

567
00:35:32,520 --> 00:35:35,840
Speaker 1: for years and years. That's not that's not human. Okay,

568
00:35:36,000 --> 00:35:38,600
Speaker 1: that's not No human thinks that that. We're not built

569
00:35:38,640 --> 00:35:41,880
Speaker 1: that way. That's not our Our genetic build up is

570
00:35:41,920 --> 00:35:45,239
Speaker 1: not made for that. We are made to struggle and

571
00:35:45,320 --> 00:35:49,360
Speaker 1: to toil, and that is the curse of mankind period.

572
00:35:49,440 --> 00:35:53,120
Speaker 1: That's just the way it is. So, my brother you,

573
00:35:54,400 --> 00:36:01,880
Speaker 1: I would encourage you to find mind the joy and

574
00:36:01,960 --> 00:36:08,920
Speaker 1: what you do today. And if you don't in trucking,

575
00:36:10,360 --> 00:36:13,439
Speaker 1: I would encourage you on the side, while you're still

576
00:36:13,440 --> 00:36:17,440
Speaker 1: making money trucking, use the time to be shopping new careers.

577
00:36:17,960 --> 00:36:21,240
Speaker 1: But don't think that the music business by any means

578
00:36:21,320 --> 00:36:24,440
Speaker 1: would bring you this mystical happiness that you've been searching

579
00:36:24,440 --> 00:36:27,640
Speaker 1: for that's going to finally solve the problems of your

580
00:36:27,760 --> 00:36:32,200
Speaker 1: childhood and meet that long lost desire to have had

581
00:36:32,719 --> 00:36:36,480
Speaker 1: a mythical success. Because I promise you, if you had

582
00:36:36,520 --> 00:36:39,600
Speaker 1: stayed in music and you met a little bit of success,

583
00:36:40,040 --> 00:36:43,000
Speaker 1: you're only thinking of the next step and the next

584
00:36:43,040 --> 00:36:45,240
Speaker 1: step and the next step, and then you're not happy

585
00:36:45,280 --> 00:36:47,680
Speaker 1: with that step, so you want instead of the van,

586
00:36:47,760 --> 00:36:49,080
Speaker 1: you want a bus, and then instead of a bus,

587
00:36:49,080 --> 00:36:50,600
Speaker 1: you want two buses. And when you have two buses,

588
00:36:50,640 --> 00:36:52,520
Speaker 1: you want a semi, and then one semi is not enough,

589
00:36:52,560 --> 00:36:55,680
Speaker 1: so you want three semis, and it's only natural to

590
00:36:55,760 --> 00:37:00,400
Speaker 1: want more. But it's not connected with happiness. You have

591
00:37:00,440 --> 00:37:03,600
Speaker 1: to find that in different places. Now, finding a drive

592
00:37:03,760 --> 00:37:07,520
Speaker 1: and motivation for your career, that's cool. I mean, I

593
00:37:07,600 --> 00:37:10,839
Speaker 1: like the music business because I'm just always grinding and

594
00:37:10,840 --> 00:37:14,080
Speaker 1: it's never easy and it's always disappointing in some way,

595
00:37:14,200 --> 00:37:16,960
Speaker 1: and I have to constantly keep my gratitude higher than

596
00:37:17,000 --> 00:37:19,480
Speaker 1: my expectations. But I don't tie any of that to

597
00:37:19,560 --> 00:37:22,800
Speaker 1: my happiness. I have to tie my happiness to other things,

598
00:37:23,320 --> 00:37:29,160
Speaker 1: meaningful things, purposeful things. And you know about this because

599
00:37:29,160 --> 00:37:33,160
Speaker 1: you mentioned it here. You said family, God, Country, So

600
00:37:33,239 --> 00:37:37,799
Speaker 1: I have to ask you, Matthew. You said I'm a

601
00:37:37,840 --> 00:37:42,160
Speaker 1: fan of you and what you do because family, God,

602
00:37:42,320 --> 00:37:46,279
Speaker 1: country all. First, I appreciate the message. So you didn't

603
00:37:46,320 --> 00:37:48,319
Speaker 1: mention music in there. You didn't say I'm a fan

604
00:37:48,360 --> 00:37:53,680
Speaker 1: of you because family, God, country and music. So even

605
00:37:53,719 --> 00:37:56,800
Speaker 1: you know that it has nothing to do. I find

606
00:37:56,840 --> 00:38:00,680
Speaker 1: my gratefulness and my happiness and my joy through my

607
00:38:00,800 --> 00:38:05,320
Speaker 1: family and my God and this podcast and knowing that maybe,

608
00:38:05,560 --> 00:38:09,719
Speaker 1: just maybe someone out there listening to this program right

609
00:38:09,719 --> 00:38:12,319
Speaker 1: now is applying this and goes, you know what, I

610
00:38:12,400 --> 00:38:15,040
Speaker 1: never thought of it that way. Maybe I could use that,

611
00:38:15,160 --> 00:38:18,799
Speaker 1: and then it's a tiny ripple effect that their life

612
00:38:18,880 --> 00:38:22,040
Speaker 1: improves just a fraction, and then the people around them

613
00:38:22,520 --> 00:38:25,080
Speaker 1: see that, and then they approve improve their life just

614
00:38:25,120 --> 00:38:28,640
Speaker 1: a fraction, and one fraction and another fraction. In industry,

615
00:38:28,640 --> 00:38:35,359
Speaker 1: it's this outward butterfly effect that brings me joy and

616
00:38:35,400 --> 00:38:39,879
Speaker 1: purpose and meaning, not the next tour or the next

617
00:38:39,920 --> 00:38:43,960
Speaker 1: album or the next radio single. I know. I've had

618
00:38:44,040 --> 00:38:47,520
Speaker 1: to tell my brain that is nothing new with your happiness, dude.

619
00:38:47,800 --> 00:38:52,200
Speaker 1: That is that is completely separate. That's I almost It's

620
00:38:52,200 --> 00:38:54,600
Speaker 1: almost like a game. Music is a game to me.

621
00:38:55,320 --> 00:38:57,359
Speaker 1: Let's build, build, build, Let's put out a single, Let's

622
00:38:57,400 --> 00:38:59,440
Speaker 1: make a record. Let's try to get as many streams

623
00:38:59,440 --> 00:39:02,960
Speaker 1: on Spotify as we can. That's a game, guys. But

624
00:39:03,040 --> 00:39:05,080
Speaker 1: I don't I don't think if this, If this song

625
00:39:05,120 --> 00:39:07,720
Speaker 1: doesn't get five million streams on Spotify in one month,

626
00:39:08,239 --> 00:39:12,360
Speaker 1: I'm not going to be happy. That is a bottomless

627
00:39:12,400 --> 00:39:15,240
Speaker 1: pit that you will never stop falling if you slip

628
00:39:15,239 --> 00:39:19,960
Speaker 1: in there. I appreciate the question, buddy. I hope that

629
00:39:20,040 --> 00:39:23,319
Speaker 1: helps you. And if you if you are looking at

630
00:39:23,360 --> 00:39:25,400
Speaker 1: for that high that you get when you play music

631
00:39:25,520 --> 00:39:29,200
Speaker 1: and people sing along with you. Dude, what about what

632
00:39:29,280 --> 00:39:31,239
Speaker 1: about an open mic night in your hometown and you

633
00:39:31,280 --> 00:39:33,000
Speaker 1: invite all your buddies and you do it once a

634
00:39:33,040 --> 00:39:35,680
Speaker 1: month and you say, Hey, I'm gonna do this little

635
00:39:35,719 --> 00:39:37,759
Speaker 1: thing once a month at the pub down the road

636
00:39:37,800 --> 00:39:41,279
Speaker 1: on Thursday nights and you invite everyone that you know

637
00:39:41,640 --> 00:39:44,160
Speaker 1: and you guys all have fun and they sing along

638
00:39:44,200 --> 00:39:46,560
Speaker 1: and boom, you scratch that itch a little bit and

639
00:39:46,600 --> 00:39:51,120
Speaker 1: then you get back to life. Let me find another

640
00:39:51,200 --> 00:39:53,839
Speaker 1: question here scrolling through the magic scroll. It's like will

641
00:39:53,840 --> 00:39:58,560
Speaker 1: of fortune. It's not will of fortune. It's a price's right,

642
00:39:58,560 --> 00:40:06,080
Speaker 1: it's got the wheel all right. This question comes from Seth.

643
00:40:06,120 --> 00:40:09,840
Speaker 1: He says, Hey, my name is Satham from New Brunswick, Canada.

644
00:40:09,920 --> 00:40:12,279
Speaker 1: Here's my question. Are you ever going to come out

645
00:40:12,840 --> 00:40:15,359
Speaker 1: and do a concert in Canada in the future if

646
00:40:15,400 --> 00:40:19,840
Speaker 1: things lighten up? Satham? Absolutely, dude, love Canada. If I

647
00:40:19,880 --> 00:40:23,920
Speaker 1: think I mentioned Canada Canada tour on this episode today,

648
00:40:23,960 --> 00:40:27,879
Speaker 1: but we're always in Canada. We're there at least two

649
00:40:28,000 --> 00:40:31,279
Speaker 1: or three times a year, if not just one or

650
00:40:31,320 --> 00:40:34,319
Speaker 1: two shows, then we're we're doing a full blown tour.

651
00:40:34,520 --> 00:40:40,759
Speaker 1: So Canada, Canada is our American brother, and all all

652
00:40:40,840 --> 00:40:42,840
Speaker 1: that's in between us is one border. We go across

653
00:40:42,880 --> 00:40:48,439
Speaker 1: it all the time. So if you're wondering wherever we're

654
00:40:48,440 --> 00:40:50,480
Speaker 1: going to go, the answer is yes, as soon as

655
00:40:50,480 --> 00:40:54,080
Speaker 1: things lighten up, will be will be everywhere. So thanks

656
00:40:54,080 --> 00:40:56,080
Speaker 1: for listening, dude, and I hope to see you whenever

657
00:40:56,080 --> 00:41:04,000
Speaker 1: we come back to Canada. Here this question says, Hey there, Granger,

658
00:41:04,080 --> 00:41:06,960
Speaker 1: this is Joseph. I'm from Las Vegas, New Mexico. I'm

659
00:41:07,000 --> 00:41:09,680
Speaker 1: a big fan of your music and your channel on YouTube.

660
00:41:10,400 --> 00:41:12,160
Speaker 1: I just got news that my girlfriend wants to have

661
00:41:12,200 --> 00:41:14,840
Speaker 1: another kid, and I'm kind of scared. I'm twenty seven

662
00:41:15,440 --> 00:41:17,600
Speaker 1: and I have a son. His name is Christopher, and

663
00:41:17,600 --> 00:41:20,120
Speaker 1: I'm having trouble on what to say to my girlfriend

664
00:41:20,840 --> 00:41:24,600
Speaker 1: and what kind of advice can you give me on this? Joseph,

665
00:41:24,640 --> 00:41:28,520
Speaker 1: thanks for writing man. Shout out to New Mexico. Love

666
00:41:28,560 --> 00:41:34,240
Speaker 1: the folks out there. That's our Texas brother. I appreciate

667
00:41:34,280 --> 00:41:36,520
Speaker 1: you being a big fan, and I appreciate the sensitive

668
00:41:36,600 --> 00:41:39,480
Speaker 1: question that you're giving me. Your girlfriend wants to have

669
00:41:39,520 --> 00:41:42,239
Speaker 1: another kid and you're scared. You're twenty seven, you have

670
00:41:42,320 --> 00:41:45,520
Speaker 1: a son and you're having trouble knowing what to say

671
00:41:45,560 --> 00:41:53,640
Speaker 1: back to your girlfriend. So let's dissect this together. First

672
00:41:53,680 --> 00:41:59,960
Speaker 1: of all, communication is key, and I appreciate you trust

673
00:42:00,200 --> 00:42:03,239
Speaker 1: me with this question, and I would encourage you to

674
00:42:03,400 --> 00:42:09,920
Speaker 1: trust your girlfriend with this question. And I think there's

675
00:42:09,960 --> 00:42:15,240
Speaker 1: a couple of layers here. One, I personally don't believe

676
00:42:15,520 --> 00:42:19,680
Speaker 1: that you should be having kids with your girlfriend on purpose.

677
00:42:20,600 --> 00:42:23,520
Speaker 1: I understand accidents, but I don't think you should be

678
00:42:23,600 --> 00:42:29,680
Speaker 1: having trying to plan on a pregnancy when you're not married.

679
00:42:30,360 --> 00:42:32,600
Speaker 1: There's a lot of reasons. I mean, we could talk

680
00:42:32,760 --> 00:42:35,560
Speaker 1: legal reasons, we could talk tax reasons, we could talk

681
00:42:36,360 --> 00:42:41,160
Speaker 1: last name reasons, we could talk religious reasons. But there

682
00:42:41,200 --> 00:42:44,200
Speaker 1: are a lot of reasons why. If this is the

683
00:42:44,239 --> 00:42:46,520
Speaker 1: girl of your dreams and you love her, then you

684
00:42:46,560 --> 00:42:49,400
Speaker 1: should go ahead and try to get married before you

685
00:42:49,520 --> 00:42:53,560
Speaker 1: plan on having a kid. And this is a discussion

686
00:42:53,600 --> 00:42:57,600
Speaker 1: you got to have with her. And I'm pretty sure

687
00:42:57,840 --> 00:43:00,000
Speaker 1: that most of your buddies, if you're going to say

688
00:43:00,120 --> 00:43:07,239
Speaker 1: them down, could tell you the same thing. I would say.

689
00:43:07,480 --> 00:43:12,120
Speaker 1: One of the biggest red flags in your question is

690
00:43:12,160 --> 00:43:18,440
Speaker 1: the fact that you are having trouble finding words to

691
00:43:18,560 --> 00:43:23,520
Speaker 1: talk with her about something that is so important, one

692
00:43:23,520 --> 00:43:26,560
Speaker 1: of the biggest decisions of your life. You're only going

693
00:43:26,640 --> 00:43:30,640
Speaker 1: to have so many kids. You already have one, and

694
00:43:30,960 --> 00:43:35,279
Speaker 1: adding another one to the mix is a lifetime commitment.

695
00:43:35,360 --> 00:43:42,080
Speaker 1: You'll go to your grave with this commitment. And it's

696
00:43:42,200 --> 00:43:44,960
Speaker 1: not something like I'm trying to talk to my girlfriend

697
00:43:45,000 --> 00:43:48,320
Speaker 1: about if we should get a chihuahua or an apartment

698
00:43:48,600 --> 00:43:53,680
Speaker 1: or a camping trip in Montana. This is this is

699
00:43:54,239 --> 00:43:57,279
Speaker 1: a really really big deal. And I know that you

700
00:43:57,480 --> 00:43:59,719
Speaker 1: know this, That's why you asked me. I'm sure you

701
00:43:59,760 --> 00:44:02,000
Speaker 1: asked because you know it's a big deal. But I

702
00:44:02,000 --> 00:44:06,359
Speaker 1: would go to her and just say, Babe, I'm gonna

703
00:44:06,360 --> 00:44:09,439
Speaker 1: put it just like you did. Dude, Babe, I'm kind

704
00:44:09,440 --> 00:44:14,080
Speaker 1: of scared. I'm twenty seven, I already have a son,

705
00:44:14,440 --> 00:44:20,560
Speaker 1: and I'm having trouble telling you that. And if if

706
00:44:21,800 --> 00:44:29,680
Speaker 1: she is a compassionate, loving, accepting, nurturing, understanding partner like

707
00:44:29,920 --> 00:44:33,040
Speaker 1: she should be, if you're considering having a kid with her,

708
00:44:34,160 --> 00:44:39,600
Speaker 1: then she's going to go Joseph, I get it. Will

709
00:44:39,800 --> 00:44:41,920
Speaker 1: will you let me know when you're ready, or what

710
00:44:41,960 --> 00:44:44,280
Speaker 1: would make you feel more comfortable? And you could say

711
00:44:45,120 --> 00:44:47,480
Speaker 1: I maybe you would say I like to be thirty

712
00:44:47,640 --> 00:44:51,200
Speaker 1: or i'd like to be married, or I'd like to

713
00:44:51,480 --> 00:44:54,200
Speaker 1: I'd like to work on my career a little bit

714
00:44:54,200 --> 00:44:57,759
Speaker 1: more before I jump into a second child. You could have.

715
00:44:57,800 --> 00:45:02,080
Speaker 1: Any of those reasons could be valid. But if she

716
00:45:02,239 --> 00:45:06,600
Speaker 1: says no, that's that's crazy. I want a kid now,

717
00:45:06,800 --> 00:45:11,040
Speaker 1: then that's like time man, Time to hit the back door, bro,

718
00:45:11,400 --> 00:45:14,239
Speaker 1: time to get out. I don't know if your son,

719
00:45:14,680 --> 00:45:17,080
Speaker 1: I don't know if Christopher is with her or not,

720
00:45:17,800 --> 00:45:20,680
Speaker 1: and that would hinge on all this this answer. But

721
00:45:21,480 --> 00:45:26,480
Speaker 1: if she doesn't accept your your sentiment here, then you

722
00:45:26,560 --> 00:45:33,319
Speaker 1: gotta you gotta hit the road and or at least

723
00:45:33,360 --> 00:45:34,879
Speaker 1: give her time to think about it. I don't want

724
00:45:34,880 --> 00:45:37,080
Speaker 1: to split you guys up right now, but this is

725
00:45:37,239 --> 00:45:40,359
Speaker 1: this is really a really big deal, and I would

726
00:45:40,400 --> 00:45:42,479
Speaker 1: encourage you to first of all, think about getting married

727
00:45:42,520 --> 00:45:45,040
Speaker 1: before it happens, and second of all, just being totally

728
00:45:45,120 --> 00:45:49,800
Speaker 1: honest with her, just straight up, babe, I'm worried. I'm scared.

729
00:45:50,560 --> 00:45:53,560
Speaker 1: Here's why. And see what she says back, and her

730
00:45:53,600 --> 00:45:56,400
Speaker 1: answer is gonna mean everything. It's going to decide everything

731
00:45:56,840 --> 00:46:00,319
Speaker 1: how she comes back, if she's angry or if she's

732
00:46:00,400 --> 00:46:03,279
Speaker 1: accepting of it. And I hope for your sake man.

733
00:46:03,320 --> 00:46:05,200
Speaker 1: I hope she's accepting of it, and I hope that

734
00:46:05,880 --> 00:46:08,239
Speaker 1: you guys can agree to go ahead and tie the knot,

735
00:46:08,280 --> 00:46:10,560
Speaker 1: go to the courthouse, tie the knot, and have a

736
00:46:10,600 --> 00:46:22,160
Speaker 1: wonderful life together. Next question comes from Jeremy. He says, Hey, Granger,

737
00:46:22,680 --> 00:46:24,880
Speaker 1: I come from a large family where I'm excited to

738
00:46:24,960 --> 00:46:30,120
Speaker 1: act and do certain things. I have been wanting to

739
00:46:30,200 --> 00:46:35,279
Speaker 1: move from Carson City, Nevada, and I want to go

740
00:46:35,320 --> 00:46:37,160
Speaker 1: out on my own into a new state down south.

741
00:46:37,200 --> 00:46:40,200
Speaker 1: I'm thirty two and I have done what my family

742
00:46:40,560 --> 00:46:43,200
Speaker 1: expects from me. But I feel like there's more to

743
00:46:43,320 --> 00:46:46,840
Speaker 1: life than just working sixteen plus hours a day. I

744
00:46:46,920 --> 00:46:49,359
Speaker 1: have a good relationship with most of my family, but

745
00:46:49,400 --> 00:46:53,320
Speaker 1: I feel like this is where this I don't feel

746
00:46:53,360 --> 00:46:57,040
Speaker 1: like this is where I belong. Should I do what

747
00:46:57,080 --> 00:47:05,239
Speaker 1: it's expected of me or find my own way? Shout

748
00:47:05,280 --> 00:47:12,040
Speaker 1: out to Nevada. Carson City awesome place. I love. I

749
00:47:12,080 --> 00:47:16,040
Speaker 1: love it out there. It's like, uh so wide open

750
00:47:16,120 --> 00:47:19,080
Speaker 1: and it just feels so cowboy out there in Carson City.

751
00:47:19,080 --> 00:47:20,840
Speaker 1: It's a It's a really cool place, and plus you

752
00:47:20,880 --> 00:47:24,240
Speaker 1: can cruise over and get a Ribby steak in Reno

753
00:47:24,760 --> 00:47:27,880
Speaker 1: right down the road. You can cruise down to Vegas.

754
00:47:27,880 --> 00:47:29,800
Speaker 1: You can go over to Lake Tahoe and see the

755
00:47:29,800 --> 00:47:34,040
Speaker 1: beautiful lake. So shout out to Carson City. Love that place. Jeremy,

756
00:47:34,040 --> 00:47:37,120
Speaker 1: thank you for the question. I think it's a great question.

757
00:47:39,360 --> 00:47:43,160
Speaker 1: I think if you don't have any ties, you're not

758
00:47:45,760 --> 00:47:51,680
Speaker 1: you're not in a marriage, then I mean, I think

759
00:47:51,719 --> 00:47:53,520
Speaker 1: you got to go for it if you if you

760
00:47:53,520 --> 00:47:56,080
Speaker 1: you want to go out on your own and go

761
00:47:56,160 --> 00:48:02,920
Speaker 1: head somewhere down south, then why not plan on a

762
00:48:04,960 --> 00:48:08,680
Speaker 1: six month hiatus and you pick a state down south,

763
00:48:09,520 --> 00:48:13,439
Speaker 1: and you align a job ahead of time, you ligne

764
00:48:13,480 --> 00:48:15,560
Speaker 1: something up where you're gonna have some kind of income,

765
00:48:15,680 --> 00:48:18,960
Speaker 1: some kind of cash flow, and you go, hey, I

766
00:48:19,000 --> 00:48:21,160
Speaker 1: mean you said your family is you have a good

767
00:48:21,160 --> 00:48:23,920
Speaker 1: relationship with them. You say, hey, guys, I'm gonna take off.

768
00:48:23,960 --> 00:48:28,240
Speaker 1: I'm going on a little adventure. I'm heading to Oklahoma

769
00:48:28,760 --> 00:48:32,600
Speaker 1: or Georgia or wherever, Texas, and I'm gonna work for

770
00:48:32,640 --> 00:48:35,440
Speaker 1: about six months. I'm gonna check it out, and then

771
00:48:35,800 --> 00:48:40,000
Speaker 1: you'll know, dude, you'll know within sixty days, like I

772
00:48:40,080 --> 00:48:44,040
Speaker 1: really miss Nevada, I miss my family, I miss my friends,

773
00:48:45,280 --> 00:48:47,719
Speaker 1: or you'll say, man, I love it, I love it

774
00:48:47,880 --> 00:48:50,360
Speaker 1: I love the freedom. I've never felt this kind of freedom.

775
00:48:50,800 --> 00:48:52,839
Speaker 1: I want to I want more. I want to start

776
00:48:52,840 --> 00:48:54,040
Speaker 1: a career. I want to move here. I want to

777
00:48:54,040 --> 00:48:57,920
Speaker 1: get an apartment. You might say that, but what you

778
00:48:57,960 --> 00:48:59,960
Speaker 1: don't want, and this is cool, that if you don't

779
00:49:00,080 --> 00:49:02,439
Speaker 1: have a tie to Nevada right now, what you don't

780
00:49:02,440 --> 00:49:04,839
Speaker 1: want is you don't want to turn forty and then

781
00:49:04,880 --> 00:49:07,200
Speaker 1: look back and go. Man, when I was thirty two,

782
00:49:07,280 --> 00:49:10,600
Speaker 1: I asked Granger on a podcast, and I never left,

783
00:49:10,719 --> 00:49:13,480
Speaker 1: and now I still wonder what it would have been like.

784
00:49:13,800 --> 00:49:15,719
Speaker 1: But by forty, you're probably you're going to be much

785
00:49:15,760 --> 00:49:20,640
Speaker 1: more tied to Carson City and a career and probably

786
00:49:20,719 --> 00:49:24,279
Speaker 1: be married and kids, and you know, so yeah, man,

787
00:49:24,640 --> 00:49:28,200
Speaker 1: I say go for it, dude, go for it. I

788
00:49:28,239 --> 00:49:33,160
Speaker 1: appreciate your your sentiment of wanting to be close to

789
00:49:33,200 --> 00:49:37,799
Speaker 1: your family. So take this time, be selfish for once

790
00:49:37,800 --> 00:49:39,759
Speaker 1: in your life, because you're allowed that for once in

791
00:49:39,800 --> 00:49:43,879
Speaker 1: your life, and FaceTime them all the time, send them postcards,

792
00:49:45,000 --> 00:49:48,279
Speaker 1: take Southwest Airlines back to Reno from Austin or San

793
00:49:48,320 --> 00:49:52,839
Speaker 1: Antonio or Dallas or Atlanta or wherever, and take this

794
00:49:52,880 --> 00:49:55,680
Speaker 1: little adventure and you might really really miss your family.

795
00:49:55,719 --> 00:49:59,640
Speaker 1: And then boom problem solved. I'm gonna take a quick

796
00:49:59,640 --> 00:50:08,200
Speaker 1: break right back. Got another question here. I'll make this

797
00:50:08,280 --> 00:50:11,399
Speaker 1: my last one, but this is from Dakota. He says, Hey, Grange,

798
00:50:11,520 --> 00:50:13,719
Speaker 1: my name is Dakota, and I need some advice. Here.

799
00:50:13,760 --> 00:50:16,120
Speaker 1: It is I met this girl and we talked for

800
00:50:16,120 --> 00:50:18,000
Speaker 1: a while, and we decided that we wanted to get together.

801
00:50:18,400 --> 00:50:21,359
Speaker 1: She has a very Christian family. I've tried my best

802
00:50:21,400 --> 00:50:23,680
Speaker 1: to do as they asked. After a few minors slip

803
00:50:23,760 --> 00:50:26,160
Speaker 1: ups on my part in one or two on her behalf,

804
00:50:26,640 --> 00:50:29,560
Speaker 1: they decided it would probably be better if we broke up,

805
00:50:29,680 --> 00:50:32,120
Speaker 1: and they made her block me on everything like Facebook,

806
00:50:32,160 --> 00:50:35,279
Speaker 1: phone number, everything. They even made her quit her job

807
00:50:35,400 --> 00:50:37,279
Speaker 1: so she wouldn't see me. She worked at the place

808
00:50:37,320 --> 00:50:39,520
Speaker 1: that I go on my lunch break at my job.

809
00:50:39,960 --> 00:50:41,799
Speaker 1: I know she still loves me and I love her,

810
00:50:42,200 --> 00:50:44,440
Speaker 1: and she even promised she'd come back, and I know

811
00:50:44,520 --> 00:50:46,799
Speaker 1: in my heart that she will. I pray about it

812
00:50:46,840 --> 00:50:49,479
Speaker 1: every night that she will come back. What I'm really

813
00:50:49,520 --> 00:50:51,839
Speaker 1: asking is do I need to forget it and move

814
00:50:51,880 --> 00:50:54,360
Speaker 1: on or do I need to believe and go with

815
00:50:54,440 --> 00:50:56,839
Speaker 1: my heart. I know the one I want to do,

816
00:50:56,920 --> 00:51:00,120
Speaker 1: but I'm in a hard place I know why, but

817
00:51:00,320 --> 00:51:02,840
Speaker 1: I don't know what to do. Give me your honest

818
00:51:03,280 --> 00:51:09,160
Speaker 1: and best answer, Dakota, this sounds like a movie. It

819
00:51:09,239 --> 00:51:13,880
Speaker 1: sounds like you're in a a movie scenario in the

820
00:51:13,960 --> 00:51:16,400
Speaker 1: nineteen thirties and the family didn't like you, so they

821
00:51:18,520 --> 00:51:25,200
Speaker 1: they made you all breakup, which is first off, Yeah,

822
00:51:25,800 --> 00:51:28,879
Speaker 1: it's crazy to say you didn't tell me how old

823
00:51:28,920 --> 00:51:32,760
Speaker 1: you are, But it's crazy to think that a family

824
00:51:32,800 --> 00:51:37,840
Speaker 1: would break up a relationship and make her block you

825
00:51:37,880 --> 00:51:41,400
Speaker 1: on everything and make her quit her job. So I

826
00:51:41,440 --> 00:51:44,000
Speaker 1: don't know much about the situation, so I can't speak

827
00:51:44,040 --> 00:51:45,600
Speaker 1: to that, and I don't know how old you are,

828
00:51:45,640 --> 00:51:48,200
Speaker 1: which is key, Like if you're thirty seven, that's a

829
00:51:48,480 --> 00:51:52,319
Speaker 1: big difference than if you're writing in you're fourteen. But

830
00:51:53,360 --> 00:51:57,160
Speaker 1: I'll tell you this. You say towards the end, you say,

831
00:51:58,360 --> 00:52:00,680
Speaker 1: I pray about it every night that she'll come back.

832
00:52:01,840 --> 00:52:04,400
Speaker 1: And what I want to encourage you to code to

833
00:52:04,440 --> 00:52:07,080
Speaker 1: write off the bat is I want to swap that

834
00:52:07,120 --> 00:52:10,919
Speaker 1: prayer around for you a little bit, because I want

835
00:52:10,960 --> 00:52:14,680
Speaker 1: you to look at it this way. God is in

836
00:52:14,680 --> 00:52:21,440
Speaker 1: control of everything, and I believe the better prayer for

837
00:52:21,560 --> 00:52:26,080
Speaker 1: you would be God. You know my heart, you know

838
00:52:26,160 --> 00:52:28,600
Speaker 1: I want this girl back with everything in my being.

839
00:52:28,600 --> 00:52:32,719
Speaker 1: You know I want this girl back, but I need

840
00:52:32,719 --> 00:52:35,600
Speaker 1: you to lead me down the path that I need

841
00:52:35,640 --> 00:52:38,200
Speaker 1: to be on, open the doors that I need to

842
00:52:38,280 --> 00:52:41,880
Speaker 1: walk through, and close the doors that I don't because

843
00:52:41,920 --> 00:52:44,160
Speaker 1: you know and I don't. And you know my plan.

844
00:52:44,400 --> 00:52:46,880
Speaker 1: You know my plan, You've built it, and you know

845
00:52:46,920 --> 00:52:48,680
Speaker 1: where I need to be and you know what You

846
00:52:48,800 --> 00:52:51,000
Speaker 1: know that I want to be with her, but that

847
00:52:51,080 --> 00:52:55,400
Speaker 1: might not be your plan, So be clear about that

848
00:52:55,440 --> 00:52:57,799
Speaker 1: to me. God show me that, show me that path

849
00:52:57,880 --> 00:53:01,760
Speaker 1: I need to be walking on. And that's a very

850
00:53:01,800 --> 00:53:05,440
Speaker 1: different prayer than God, make her come back. God make

851
00:53:05,480 --> 00:53:08,319
Speaker 1: her come back, Please make her come back. I understand that,

852
00:53:08,480 --> 00:53:11,080
Speaker 1: I understand that prayer. We've all said that at some point.

853
00:53:12,440 --> 00:53:14,759
Speaker 1: But that's that's where I want you to start, or

854
00:53:14,760 --> 00:53:18,760
Speaker 1: that's why I would encourage you to start with understanding

855
00:53:19,960 --> 00:53:24,040
Speaker 1: that God might have a different plan for you. And

856
00:53:24,960 --> 00:53:30,200
Speaker 1: once you prepare a prayer like that, like you know

857
00:53:30,280 --> 00:53:32,879
Speaker 1: my heart, you know what I want, But just show

858
00:53:32,960 --> 00:53:35,480
Speaker 1: me what I need to do because I'm kind of stuck.

859
00:53:35,920 --> 00:53:39,200
Speaker 1: I kind of feel like I'm up against the wall

860
00:53:39,239 --> 00:53:41,920
Speaker 1: here and I can't go any farther because I'm stuck

861
00:53:41,920 --> 00:53:44,080
Speaker 1: with I'm stuck on her and I know she's going

862
00:53:44,160 --> 00:53:48,200
Speaker 1: to come back. Instead of saying, Okay, God, break down

863
00:53:48,200 --> 00:53:50,200
Speaker 1: this wall, then I feel like I'm up against the wall.

864
00:53:50,280 --> 00:53:53,360
Speaker 1: You break it down so that I could move forward

865
00:53:53,440 --> 00:53:56,400
Speaker 1: in the direction you need me to go. That's a

866
00:53:56,400 --> 00:54:00,400
Speaker 1: different man. That's mature. That is a mature prayer, and

867
00:54:00,440 --> 00:54:07,040
Speaker 1: it's difficult. But as I've gotten older, I've learned to

868
00:54:07,120 --> 00:54:09,880
Speaker 1: say that prayer more because I've been in some situations

869
00:54:09,960 --> 00:54:14,680
Speaker 1: in my life when everything in my fireber wanted something

870
00:54:15,160 --> 00:54:20,640
Speaker 1: to change, and I had to finally give up on

871
00:54:20,719 --> 00:54:24,640
Speaker 1: that prayer and change the words around to everything in

872
00:54:24,680 --> 00:54:28,600
Speaker 1: my power wants this to change. God, but you might not.

873
00:54:29,840 --> 00:54:33,960
Speaker 1: So let me give it up to you. Let me

874
00:54:34,000 --> 00:54:39,719
Speaker 1: follow you. And if you do that, Dakota gonna first off,

875
00:54:39,719 --> 00:54:41,399
Speaker 1: you're just gonna feel a little bit of peace come

876
00:54:41,440 --> 00:54:43,520
Speaker 1: over you. It might be a lot of peace, but

877
00:54:44,160 --> 00:54:48,799
Speaker 1: you're gonna feel that presence like Yeah, it's kind of

878
00:54:48,800 --> 00:54:51,000
Speaker 1: like when your mom corrected you when you're a kid,

879
00:54:51,440 --> 00:54:54,759
Speaker 1: and deep down you knew she was right, and so

880
00:54:54,840 --> 00:54:58,360
Speaker 1: when she caught you doing something bad, you're like, ah,

881
00:54:58,480 --> 00:55:02,839
Speaker 1: you got me, mom, okay, And it's it's it's the

882
00:55:02,880 --> 00:55:06,240
Speaker 1: same we're we're we are servants and uh, we're children

883
00:55:06,520 --> 00:55:10,719
Speaker 1: in a lot of ways like that. So, man, it

884
00:55:10,760 --> 00:55:14,640
Speaker 1: sucks that you're you're in this and this is this

885
00:55:14,719 --> 00:55:18,600
Speaker 1: is something that most of these podcast listeners today could

886
00:55:18,680 --> 00:55:21,200
Speaker 1: relate to. Man, it's very human to be in a

887
00:55:21,239 --> 00:55:26,080
Speaker 1: relationship when things are not working out or outside sources

888
00:55:26,120 --> 00:55:29,680
Speaker 1: are breaking it up, or you could you could have

889
00:55:29,680 --> 00:55:32,960
Speaker 1: written this story ten different ways and would all been

890
00:55:33,120 --> 00:55:36,080
Speaker 1: have been believable. She could have just stopped liking you

891
00:55:36,280 --> 00:55:39,160
Speaker 1: or stopped caring about you. It could have been that

892
00:55:39,200 --> 00:55:45,200
Speaker 1: way too. So to answer your your question says, do

893
00:55:45,239 --> 00:55:47,279
Speaker 1: I just need to forget it and move on or

894
00:55:47,320 --> 00:55:50,840
Speaker 1: do I need to believe and go with my heart?

895
00:55:51,560 --> 00:55:53,879
Speaker 1: Don't believe in go with your heart, because that that's

896
00:55:53,920 --> 00:55:57,440
Speaker 1: where that's where you become a psycho. You have been

897
00:55:57,640 --> 00:56:01,000
Speaker 1: the door has been shut. And when when a relationship

898
00:56:01,040 --> 00:56:04,480
Speaker 1: door has been shut, that doesn't mean you gotta go

899
00:56:04,800 --> 00:56:07,719
Speaker 1: all the brave heart on her and go wait by

900
00:56:07,719 --> 00:56:09,799
Speaker 1: her window and throw pebbles at her window and say

901
00:56:09,840 --> 00:56:12,399
Speaker 1: I'm here, I'm going with my heart. I'm never leaving.

902
00:56:12,520 --> 00:56:16,680
Speaker 1: Don't do that. So, and I know you don't mean that,

903
00:56:17,280 --> 00:56:23,000
Speaker 1: but you don't have to forget it either. Right, it's

904
00:56:23,040 --> 00:56:25,440
Speaker 1: not that black and white. You don't have to just go, Okay,

905
00:56:25,600 --> 00:56:27,840
Speaker 1: I forget it and move on forever. It's done forever,

906
00:56:28,160 --> 00:56:30,080
Speaker 1: and you don't have to go I'm never gonna give

907
00:56:30,120 --> 00:56:31,400
Speaker 1: up on this girl. Ever. I want to still buy

908
00:56:31,400 --> 00:56:34,080
Speaker 1: a window. You don't do that either. I think the

909
00:56:34,120 --> 00:56:36,839
Speaker 1: answer is more right in between. You go okay, I'm

910
00:56:36,840 --> 00:56:42,000
Speaker 1: gonna back off socially, physically, emotionally. I'm gonna back off.

911
00:56:42,080 --> 00:56:44,759
Speaker 1: It's not easy. I'm gonna back off. I'm gonna leave

912
00:56:44,800 --> 00:56:47,879
Speaker 1: that door possibly open. And that's part of the prayer

913
00:56:47,960 --> 00:56:49,839
Speaker 1: I was talking about. God. Maybe that door is gonna

914
00:56:49,840 --> 00:56:51,239
Speaker 1: You tell me. If that door is open, I'll walk

915
00:56:51,320 --> 00:56:53,640
Speaker 1: right back through it. But right now I'm gonna back away.

916
00:56:54,280 --> 00:56:56,600
Speaker 1: I'm going to take care of myself a little bit.

917
00:56:56,920 --> 00:56:59,080
Speaker 1: I'm gonna you said you got a job, you know,

918
00:56:59,880 --> 00:57:01,360
Speaker 1: I'm gonna focus on my job. I'm gonna make my

919
00:57:01,440 --> 00:57:04,080
Speaker 1: job really good. I'm gonna work really hard. I'm going

920
00:57:04,160 --> 00:57:08,000
Speaker 1: to use this time to reinvest into my buddies that

921
00:57:08,200 --> 00:57:10,799
Speaker 1: maybe I've kind of neglected my buddies a little bit

922
00:57:10,800 --> 00:57:12,640
Speaker 1: because I've been in this relationship and I've been all

923
00:57:12,719 --> 00:57:15,000
Speaker 1: hung up on this girl. I'm going to go back

924
00:57:15,000 --> 00:57:18,160
Speaker 1: to my buddies that might even be missing me because

925
00:57:18,160 --> 00:57:20,439
Speaker 1: I've had to avoid them a lot of Friday nights

926
00:57:20,440 --> 00:57:22,280
Speaker 1: that I was going to the movie theater with this girl.

927
00:57:22,720 --> 00:57:24,080
Speaker 1: Go back to my buddies and go, hey, I want

928
00:57:24,120 --> 00:57:27,080
Speaker 1: to hang out and be there for them, and return

929
00:57:27,400 --> 00:57:34,200
Speaker 1: to them and give them yourself as a friend, whether

930
00:57:34,200 --> 00:57:37,680
Speaker 1: you've got to listen or hang or laugh or have fun.

931
00:57:38,680 --> 00:57:45,840
Speaker 1: Reinvest in your friendship and your job. And wait, patience,

932
00:57:46,240 --> 00:57:49,600
Speaker 1: repeat that prayer we talked about, see what happens. Let

933
00:57:49,640 --> 00:57:53,720
Speaker 1: time go by. If this girl is meant for you,

934
00:57:54,320 --> 00:57:56,880
Speaker 1: it's going to happen. It's just going to happen. If

935
00:57:56,920 --> 00:58:00,960
Speaker 1: it's not, it's not, and you'll know because you'll see

936
00:58:00,960 --> 00:58:05,320
Speaker 1: that door open or closed. That's my answer to you, man,

937
00:58:05,360 --> 00:58:08,120
Speaker 1: That's as you said. That's my honest and best answer.

938
00:58:08,880 --> 00:58:10,640
Speaker 1: That's what I would tell my brother or my best

939
00:58:10,680 --> 00:58:14,640
Speaker 1: friend or anybody else. And it's not easy. But hang

940
00:58:14,680 --> 00:58:17,520
Speaker 1: in there, man. I know it feels like you got

941
00:58:17,520 --> 00:58:19,480
Speaker 1: blinders on and you can't see anything in front of

942
00:58:19,520 --> 00:58:24,000
Speaker 1: your face but this particular subject. But go back to

943
00:58:24,040 --> 00:58:28,920
Speaker 1: your buddies, Open up invest in your job, and I

944
00:58:28,920 --> 00:58:32,240
Speaker 1: think good things are gonna happen for you. I appreciate

945
00:58:32,320 --> 00:58:34,920
Speaker 1: your questions. Guys. If you have anything for me Granger

946
00:58:35,000 --> 00:58:38,040
Speaker 1: Smith Podcast at gmail dot com hit me up. I'd

947
00:58:38,080 --> 00:58:41,680
Speaker 1: love to read them. Enjoy your week. Thanks for being

948
00:58:41,680 --> 00:58:43,960
Speaker 1: with me this Monday. Love you guys. Eye