WEBVTT - GECKMAIL: “I’VE SPUN A WEB OF LIES” 0:00:00.120 --> 0:00:05.400 Hello, Welcome, Hi, Welcome to gek mail. It is a 0:00:05.519 --> 0:00:12.160 thing that I started doing recently where instead of having 0:00:12.200 --> 0:00:17.680 a two way conversation with another person anonymously on the phone, 0:00:17.680 --> 0:00:21.119 which is what I typically do on my show, I 0:00:21.200 --> 0:00:28.720 have a one way conversation with myself. How lonely, how desolate. 0:00:29.320 --> 0:00:33.760 But you know what, It's fine because I also have 0:00:33.920 --> 0:00:36.200 emails that I'm going to read. A lot of people 0:00:36.760 --> 0:00:40.360 have sent me emails. I made an Instagram story I said, 0:00:40.520 --> 0:00:46.240 everyone sends an email to therapy geckomail at gmail dot 0:00:46.240 --> 0:00:51.240 com with whatever, with the stuff that's going on. And 0:00:52.120 --> 0:00:56.200 I am excited today to read these emails. I got 0:00:56.200 --> 0:01:00.720 so many notifications which gave my brain a lot of opamine, 0:01:01.120 --> 0:01:05.360 and so I'm ready to read some people's emails. Before 0:01:05.400 --> 0:01:08.920 we do that, I want to say thank you to 0:01:09.040 --> 0:01:13.600 everyone who came out to my tour in twenty twenty four. 0:01:13.720 --> 0:01:19.800 I'm finally done. I have no pending tour dates. I 0:01:19.800 --> 0:01:22.160 don't know when I'll go back on the road. I 0:01:22.160 --> 0:01:24.440 don't know if I'll go on the road in twenty 0:01:24.520 --> 0:01:26.679 twenty five. I might take a long break to kind 0:01:26.680 --> 0:01:29.559 of reevaluate what the hell I'm gonna do. With my life. 0:01:29.920 --> 0:01:34.560 But if you came and you said what's up, and 0:01:35.200 --> 0:01:38.119 I appreciate you, thank you very much for doing that. 0:01:38.480 --> 0:01:41.560 And I actually I'm inspired to keep doing this get 0:01:41.600 --> 0:01:43.840 mail segment because a lot of people when I do 0:01:43.920 --> 0:01:45.760 like a meet and grade after all my shows, and 0:01:45.840 --> 0:01:48.040 a lot of people came up to me at the 0:01:48.040 --> 0:01:51.080 meet and greets and told me that they like the 0:01:51.200 --> 0:01:53.120 viewer mail thing and to keep doing it. And so 0:01:53.200 --> 0:01:55.680 I was like, oh, and that felt good because normally, 0:01:55.720 --> 0:01:59.200 when you're recording a podcast or doing anything on the internet, 0:01:59.200 --> 0:02:02.120 it's just all youse his numbers, and you kind of 0:02:02.200 --> 0:02:05.680 use those numbers to determine whether or not people like something. 0:02:06.080 --> 0:02:09.040 But then you know, a guy named Jeff with like 0:02:09.080 --> 0:02:12.320 a face and stuff will say out of his mouth 0:02:12.440 --> 0:02:14.720 to you, hey, I listen. Hey, I am a human 0:02:14.760 --> 0:02:19.040 being and I listen to your viewer mail thing, and 0:02:19.040 --> 0:02:20.600 you should keep doing it. And I'm like, oh, look 0:02:20.600 --> 0:02:24.040 at this guy. He's made of flesh and bone and 0:02:24.160 --> 0:02:27.720 he listens to the viewer mail segment. So thank you 0:02:27.919 --> 0:02:32.000 Jeff listening to this viewer mail segment. I appreciate you. 0:02:33.560 --> 0:02:41.040 Anything else, I'm feeling good, I'm off a normally I'm 0:02:41.040 --> 0:02:46.040 off a Celsius, but today I'm off a diet Mountain dew. 0:02:46.080 --> 0:02:50.360 It's got about ninety one milligrams of caffeine, which is 0:02:50.680 --> 0:02:58.000 enough to which is enough to read these emails. So 0:02:58.280 --> 0:03:01.400 I'm gonna do that. I'm gonna read these emails. Let's 0:03:01.440 --> 0:03:07.480 start reading some emails, all right. First email is from Ashley. 0:03:08.680 --> 0:03:13.400 The subject line is words for the geck. Am I 0:03:13.680 --> 0:03:17.720 a whore? Okay? I have wanted to call in and 0:03:17.760 --> 0:03:21.760 I would love to chat about my current love life situation. 0:03:22.440 --> 0:03:25.040 I have been with a guy for ten years, and 0:03:25.120 --> 0:03:27.960 before that I was only with one person who broke 0:03:28.040 --> 0:03:31.000 my heart. I never got the chance to be single. Really, 0:03:31.360 --> 0:03:34.200 now fast forward. I've wanted him to propose for so 0:03:34.400 --> 0:03:37.680 long and it hasn't happened, and now should I leave 0:03:38.320 --> 0:03:41.680 the situation? But it's oh, this is a run on sentence. Okay, 0:03:41.680 --> 0:03:46.400 this is a really long run on sentence. Hold on. Look, 0:03:46.640 --> 0:03:49.200 if you send an email, try to include like periods 0:03:49.280 --> 0:03:52.040 and commas and stuff. Boss whatever, I'll figure it out. 0:03:52.080 --> 0:03:54.200 I'll figure it out. You did your best with this email, 0:03:54.760 --> 0:03:56.480 and I'm gonna figure it out. I'm gonna just put 0:03:56.520 --> 0:04:01.360 I'm gonna put in my own comma commas and periods 0:04:01.960 --> 0:04:07.400 into this email. Okay, where was it? Now? Fast forward? 0:04:07.440 --> 0:04:09.680 I've wanted him to propose for so long and it 0:04:09.760 --> 0:04:14.560 hasn't happened. Now should I leave the situation? But it's 0:04:14.640 --> 0:04:16.800 hard to find someone. Plus I don't know if I 0:04:16.880 --> 0:04:19.600 could find someone again that will love me. And recently 0:04:19.640 --> 0:04:22.719 I've met someone who is a friend with other friends. 0:04:22.800 --> 0:04:28.640 He is straightforward, blunt, and is just looking for a FBW. 0:04:28.920 --> 0:04:32.239 It stands for friends with benefits. I've never done that before, 0:04:32.360 --> 0:04:35.080 but took the leap, and now I know he doesn't 0:04:35.080 --> 0:04:38.200 want a relationship. I'm not sure if he just thinks 0:04:38.240 --> 0:04:40.600 of me as some type of whoror with all the 0:04:40.760 --> 0:04:44.520 things that happened. But also I like being his friend, 0:04:44.640 --> 0:04:47.680 but would maybe be curious if he would ever be 0:04:47.760 --> 0:04:51.000 into me in a relationship since before him, I fell 0:04:51.040 --> 0:04:52.760 in love with my girl best friend, and we both 0:04:52.800 --> 0:04:55.280 have significant others. But every time we come together we're 0:04:55.320 --> 0:04:56.960 like peas in a pod and too Okay, all right, 0:04:57.839 --> 0:05:02.560 that's it. That's pretty much the thing here. Okay, I'm 0:05:02.600 --> 0:05:06.640 trying to formulate what my thoughts are for this girl. One. 0:05:06.760 --> 0:05:11.279 You're not a whore, Okay, You're not a whore. There's 0:05:11.440 --> 0:05:13.200 even if you were a whore, there's nothing wrong with 0:05:13.360 --> 0:05:15.599 being a whore, not that you are one. I don't 0:05:15.600 --> 0:05:19.560 believe that you are one. So don't beat yourself up 0:05:20.080 --> 0:05:25.760 for that. Don't call yourself that you're fine, totally fine, Ashley, 0:05:25.880 --> 0:05:29.040 don't worry. Okay, this second, here's the thing. Here's what 0:05:29.120 --> 0:05:33.560 I'm getting out of this run on sentence. I think 0:05:33.640 --> 0:05:35.680 this is one sentence. It's got a lot of comments, 0:05:35.880 --> 0:05:41.040 it's got a lot of commas, but no periods. Look, 0:05:41.080 --> 0:05:43.080 first of all, Ashley, Look, if you're just if you 0:05:43.320 --> 0:05:45.280 just want to have sex with people and that's what 0:05:45.480 --> 0:05:49.600 you want, that's fine. And if you find other people 0:05:49.720 --> 0:05:52.400 that that's what they want, that's cool too. And if 0:05:52.440 --> 0:05:55.479 you find other people and and and ideally, in an 0:05:55.560 --> 0:05:58.680 ideal world which I'd love to live in, which we'd 0:05:58.720 --> 0:06:03.360 all like to live in, people would be perfectly aligned 0:06:03.520 --> 0:06:06.200 with each other upon meeting. Now, we do not always 0:06:06.320 --> 0:06:11.640 live in an ideal world. But I don't know. You 0:06:11.760 --> 0:06:13.840 said you're curious if he would ever be in a 0:06:13.920 --> 0:06:17.280 relationship with this guy, Why don't you just talk to him? 0:06:18.120 --> 0:06:20.360 I feel like ninety nine percent of these things are 0:06:20.480 --> 0:06:22.400 just like, just talk to him. Okay, you're having sex 0:06:22.440 --> 0:06:24.280 with this guy, you're like, oh, I kind of like 0:06:24.400 --> 0:06:26.920 him from more than just having sex with him. Maybe 0:06:26.960 --> 0:06:29.640 he would be into something more. And then ask him 0:06:30.600 --> 0:06:34.000 and he'll either say he'll either say he'll say something 0:06:34.600 --> 0:06:41.400 on the spectrum between yes and no, anything besides anything 0:06:41.480 --> 0:06:45.720 on that spectrum that's not yes kind of means no. 0:06:46.360 --> 0:06:50.080 And then after you have that information you you can 0:06:50.240 --> 0:06:54.040 use it to determine what you want to do moving forward. 0:06:55.720 --> 0:06:58.960 This okay, I'm sorry, Ashley, I'm sorry to keep making 0:06:58.960 --> 0:07:00.800 fun of you for this, but I I by the 0:07:00.960 --> 0:07:03.720 nature of the fact that there are no periods in 0:07:03.839 --> 0:07:10.200 this paragraph, you are striking me as not being highly 0:07:10.320 --> 0:07:16.600 experienced with communication, which is fine. You will. I believe 0:07:17.200 --> 0:07:19.440 that there is hope for you to become more experienced 0:07:19.520 --> 0:07:21.480 with this. So why don't you just why don't you 0:07:21.480 --> 0:07:24.320 just ask this guy if you like him, if he 0:07:24.480 --> 0:07:28.240 likes you in that kind of way, and if he doesn't, 0:07:28.600 --> 0:07:30.320 then you can make your own decision as to whether 0:07:30.360 --> 0:07:33.520 you want to keep seeing him. And also, by the thing, 0:07:34.560 --> 0:07:36.040 you also are like, I don't know if I'm ever 0:07:36.080 --> 0:07:38.440 gonna find someone who will love you again. You will. 0:07:38.520 --> 0:07:42.160 I'm confident you will. I'm positive you will. Well, I'm not, 0:07:45.080 --> 0:07:49.040 you know, I don't, I don't know. 0:07:49.200 --> 0:07:50.120 I I. 0:07:51.600 --> 0:07:54.360 Guess. Life a lot of the times feels like it's 0:07:54.520 --> 0:07:58.320 just a choice between optimism and pessimism, and with pessimism 0:07:58.440 --> 0:08:02.480 you get nothing, and with optimism you get maybe. And 0:08:02.680 --> 0:08:05.520 so take your maybe, Ashley, and be optimistic that you 0:08:05.600 --> 0:08:11.040 will find love again. What is this? What do you 0:08:11.160 --> 0:08:13.480 I'm trying to read more into this email to see 0:08:13.480 --> 0:08:15.760 if I missed anything. I fell in love with my 0:08:15.920 --> 0:08:19.240 girl best friend. But every time it sounds like you, like, 0:08:19.480 --> 0:08:21.320 like your girl best friend, but you don't know if 0:08:21.360 --> 0:08:28.480 she's gay. I guess, but she also has a boy. 0:08:28.520 --> 0:08:30.520 You don't know if she's gay. And she also says 0:08:30.560 --> 0:08:32.520 we both have significant other I fell in love with 0:08:32.600 --> 0:08:34.840 my girl best friend and we both have significant others. Okay, 0:08:34.920 --> 0:08:38.480 maybe that's not I don't know. It sounds like it 0:08:38.559 --> 0:08:45.200 sounds like you could use some uh some some self esteem, Ashley. 0:08:46.520 --> 0:08:48.800 You gotta stop. You got and you can't be beating 0:08:48.840 --> 0:08:52.559 yourself up like this saying that you're not gonna you 0:08:52.600 --> 0:08:54.080 don't know if you can find someone that will love 0:08:54.120 --> 0:08:58.720 you again. I think you will. I think you will. 0:08:59.040 --> 0:09:02.760 At least. I think you probably will if you're optimistic 0:09:02.800 --> 0:09:05.920 about it, because whatever whatever you seek, you shall find, 0:09:07.000 --> 0:09:09.040 you know, I don't know if. I don't know if 0:09:09.080 --> 0:09:11.080 any of this, I don't know if this was helpful, 0:09:11.840 --> 0:09:17.760 but I'm trying. All right, let's move on. Uh okay, 0:09:18.080 --> 0:09:22.000 dealing with a porn addiction in a relationship. That's the 0:09:22.080 --> 0:09:31.319 subject line of an email from minecraft man, hey Lyle. Yesterday, 0:09:31.440 --> 0:09:34.719 A large web of lies I've been spinning for a 0:09:34.760 --> 0:09:38.040 little over a year came undone and resulted in my 0:09:38.160 --> 0:09:42.000 girlfriend of three years finding out about the porn addiction 0:09:42.640 --> 0:09:45.679 I suffered with at the start of our relationship. I 0:09:45.840 --> 0:09:49.560 was subscribed to multiple OnlyFans pages while telling my girlfriend 0:09:49.920 --> 0:09:55.600 how deplorable and gross I thought porn was. Ah ah, 0:09:59.000 --> 0:10:01.000 We're going to try and work it out. She has 0:10:01.080 --> 0:10:03.319 some pretty severe mental health issues and the thought of 0:10:03.400 --> 0:10:05.960 her hurting herself due to my actions is so painful. 0:10:06.120 --> 0:10:10.480 Oh man, I feel quite lost, but I also feel 0:10:10.559 --> 0:10:13.520 good in not having to continue this lie thanks to 0:10:13.559 --> 0:10:18.079 minecraft Man twenty four hundred. Was it Minecraft porn? What 0:10:18.240 --> 0:10:20.640 kind of porn was it? That doesn't really matter at all? 0:10:24.360 --> 0:10:29.200 Oh fuck, that's heavy. This is heavy? Sort of yes, 0:10:32.160 --> 0:10:39.360 oh man, Okay, all right, Well, I don't know, minecraft Man. 0:10:39.679 --> 0:10:44.280 I think maybe I was I was telling her how 0:10:44.320 --> 0:10:47.160 to gross and deplorable is. I think it's funny. It's 0:10:47.160 --> 0:10:49.120 funny because I think it's one thing to like hide 0:10:49.200 --> 0:10:54.120 a secret porn stash, but then too or like I 0:10:54.480 --> 0:10:56.959 like if you're like, like, like if your girlfriend's going 0:10:57.000 --> 0:10:59.640 on a rant about like how gross she finds porn, 0:11:00.480 --> 0:11:04.560 and you're like, it's kind of sitting there like, oh yeah, yeah, 0:11:05.720 --> 0:11:07.719 you know, that's kind of I guess that's what That's 0:11:07.760 --> 0:11:10.320 probably not great, But that's one thing. I guess. It's 0:11:10.360 --> 0:11:12.760 the other thing to like actively bring it up that 0:11:12.880 --> 0:11:17.240 you think porn is horrible. Well, you know, I don't know, 0:11:17.640 --> 0:11:20.960 you seem like a younger guy. I'm only I'm judging 0:11:21.040 --> 0:11:28.400 that by your your email minecraft Man, twenty four hundred. 0:11:29.200 --> 0:11:30.839 I think maybe as you get older, you become a 0:11:30.880 --> 0:11:36.440 little bit more comfortable with yourself, right, Like I guess, 0:11:36.679 --> 0:11:46.680 I look, I'm I'm I myself indulge in pornography from 0:11:46.720 --> 0:11:50.559 time to time. By from time to time, I mean 0:11:50.679 --> 0:11:53.439 probably every day. Maybe I don't know, sometimes I just 0:11:53.520 --> 0:11:55.760 do thoughts, but you know, it's probably like every other 0:11:55.880 --> 0:12:01.160 day porn versus thoughts. But I would hope that like 0:12:01.480 --> 0:12:03.800 my girl. I don't have a girlfriend, but like if 0:12:03.960 --> 0:12:07.640 I had one, that she I could talk to her 0:12:07.720 --> 0:12:10.920 about these things, you know, like if you're gonna have 0:12:11.040 --> 0:12:13.840 it like that, like a relationship would be a thing 0:12:13.920 --> 0:12:19.800 where you would really you want to trust this person. 0:12:19.880 --> 0:12:22.400 You want this person to know you, not you don't 0:12:22.400 --> 0:12:24.480 want to like it's already to have. You gonna have 0:12:24.559 --> 0:12:28.839 some things that you keeping to yourself. If you're super 0:12:28.920 --> 0:12:33.040 into minecraft porn or you watch porn way too where 0:12:33.120 --> 0:12:36.199 you watch porn all the time, like from like you 0:12:36.280 --> 0:12:38.440 watch it at work or whatever, and you don't wanna 0:12:39.280 --> 0:12:41.960 you're not maybe ready or comfortable to share the extent 0:12:43.200 --> 0:12:46.880 of your thing. That makes sense some things, I think 0:12:47.080 --> 0:12:50.280 it makes sense to keep close to the chest. But uh, 0:12:50.400 --> 0:12:52.480 I guess your partners, you be a person you feel 0:12:52.480 --> 0:12:56.800 comfortable talking to about this kind of stuff. But when 0:12:56.840 --> 0:12:58.360 you say also, when you said she had some pretty 0:12:58.360 --> 0:12:59.959 severe mental health issues in the thought of her heart 0:13:00.120 --> 0:13:07.160 herself to my actions is painful. I but look, man, 0:13:07.280 --> 0:13:09.160 I'm sorry to hear that your girlfriend is dealing with 0:13:09.240 --> 0:13:16.120 this stuff. But another nobody, you fuck, dude, No nobody 0:13:18.120 --> 0:13:23.319 hurting themselves. Is that's the that's something's going on in 0:13:23.400 --> 0:13:28.439 their own brain, right, And I don't think you can 0:13:29.080 --> 0:13:34.480 blame yourself for something like that. I'm gonna move on, 0:13:34.960 --> 0:13:38.400 but I like but I hope you watch less porn 0:13:40.880 --> 0:13:45.360 and replace it with with with video games or or 0:13:45.440 --> 0:13:55.000 cigarettes or something. Okay, let's see here. Uh this is 0:13:55.640 --> 0:14:05.960 from Evan. Subject line is pizza, Hey goeck o Evan again? Crap? 0:14:07.720 --> 0:14:10.240 I don't. I don't know if you listen to this podcast, Evan, 0:14:10.320 --> 0:14:14.520 but I'm really bad at first names. I have one 0:14:14.559 --> 0:14:17.840 more question. He's hey, got go Evan again? I had 0:14:17.920 --> 0:14:22.120 one more question. If you see this, does anyone remember An? Evan? Evan? 0:14:22.160 --> 0:14:24.880 I'm sure if you gave me I swear my life, Evan, 0:14:24.920 --> 0:14:27.920 if you gave me any other context to who you 0:14:28.040 --> 0:14:30.640 are besides your first name, and if we if we 0:14:30.800 --> 0:14:33.520 talked and you give me any other context to yourself 0:14:33.560 --> 0:14:35.880 about aside from just your first name, like what we 0:14:36.000 --> 0:14:38.360 talked about or whatever, I would remember you. But I 0:14:38.800 --> 0:14:41.480 for first name, you know what? Whatever? Fuck it good 0:14:41.520 --> 0:14:43.800 to hear from you again, Evan. How you doing? Hey 0:14:43.880 --> 0:14:46.200 gock go Evan again? I had one more question. If 0:14:46.240 --> 0:14:49.400 you see this, what's your favorite pizza place? Personally? Mine 0:14:49.560 --> 0:14:53.480 is Domino's Parentheses. I know, hot take. What a great 0:14:53.560 --> 0:14:55.080 question this is. 0:14:55.360 --> 0:14:55.880 I like this. 0:14:56.880 --> 0:14:59.920 This is. This is easier to answer than what should 0:14:59.920 --> 0:15:04.920 I I do if my partner is harming herself. Let's see, 0:15:05.880 --> 0:15:12.480 let's see my favorite pizza place. My favorite pizza place, Evan, 0:15:12.840 --> 0:15:19.080 thank you for asking. My favorite pizza place is the 0:15:19.400 --> 0:15:21.200 ninety nine cent or I don't even know if it 0:15:21.280 --> 0:15:23.200 exists anymore. At nine I think it's a dollar fifty, 0:15:23.200 --> 0:15:25.600 but I like the dollar fifty pizza in New York 0:15:26.000 --> 0:15:29.720 and everyone is like, oh, it's shitty pizza, but it's not, 0:15:31.240 --> 0:15:35.440 and people are I'm not a food snob. Whatever. I 0:15:35.520 --> 0:15:37.800 think that some pizza you go to at a fancy 0:15:37.840 --> 0:15:41.480 place and it's like nineteen dollars for one slice, is 0:15:41.640 --> 0:15:45.120 you're gonna have the same experience as if you just 0:15:45.200 --> 0:15:47.400 have the ninety nine cent place. I'm a big fan 0:15:47.440 --> 0:15:50.560 of those ninety nine cent pizza places. And I hope 0:15:50.560 --> 0:15:52.840 you're doing well, Evan. I forgot what we talked about 0:15:53.040 --> 0:15:55.160 because he didn't give me any information about it, But 0:15:56.240 --> 0:16:00.480 whatever it was, I hope you're doing better with it now. Okay, 0:16:01.200 --> 0:16:10.160 all right, let's keep going. Uh, all right, this is hell. Okay. 0:16:10.200 --> 0:16:16.760 Someone said hello from Africa, high Ghak, my name is Okay. 0:16:16.880 --> 0:16:18.800 They said, hi Ghak, my name is and then they 0:16:18.840 --> 0:16:21.240 wrote their name, and then they wrote parentheses. Please don't 0:16:21.320 --> 0:16:24.960 mention my name. I'm afraid someone exposes me. If okay, 0:16:25.440 --> 0:16:27.320 I'm gonna call you George. That's not the name you 0:16:27.400 --> 0:16:29.760 gave me, but George. If you don't want me to 0:16:29.880 --> 0:16:32.960 mention your name, don't put your name in the email, okay, 0:16:33.480 --> 0:16:35.720 because I would have wrote because the way you structure 0:16:35.760 --> 0:16:40.760 your email is that you wrote right. Don't mention my 0:16:40.920 --> 0:16:43.800 name before writing your name, because I don't. I read 0:16:44.560 --> 0:16:47.600 from left to right, so I would have read your 0:16:47.680 --> 0:16:52.840 name before reading. Not to mention. Okay, all right, all right, 0:16:52.840 --> 0:16:55.360 I'm gonna call you George, high Gak. My name is George. 0:16:55.680 --> 0:16:57.880 Please don't mention he he wrote, high Gak, my name 0:16:57.920 --> 0:17:00.920 is George. Please don't mention my name. I'm afraid someone 0:17:01.080 --> 0:17:06.119 exposes me. Okay. I listened to every episode of your 0:17:06.160 --> 0:17:09.280 show in twenty twenty four on Spotify. I literally fall 0:17:09.320 --> 0:17:12.320 asleep to this every night. I'm twenty four and I 0:17:12.400 --> 0:17:15.760 am engaged. I should get married in seven months. But 0:17:15.880 --> 0:17:18.520 the thing is I don't feel financially and mentally ready 0:17:18.560 --> 0:17:20.639 to take the step, but never had the courage to 0:17:20.720 --> 0:17:24.119 tell this to my fiance. I've applied to a visa 0:17:24.640 --> 0:17:29.160 to Portugal behind her back, and my trip might happen 0:17:29.200 --> 0:17:32.800 in February. I used her money from her car that 0:17:32.960 --> 0:17:36.760 she sold to afford all the costs involved, which is 0:17:36.800 --> 0:17:40.320 around four k. This money was supposed to be used 0:17:40.400 --> 0:17:43.240 for the marriage, and I don't know how to tell 0:17:43.280 --> 0:17:46.280 her this. What the fuck? I really love her to 0:17:46.400 --> 0:17:49.159 death and I don't really intend to run away. I 0:17:49.280 --> 0:17:52.760 just want to work in Europe, get money for the wedding, 0:17:53.359 --> 0:17:55.399 rent a house, and later come back to my country 0:17:55.480 --> 0:17:57.680 to marry her and take her with me to Portugal. Buddy, 0:17:57.960 --> 0:18:02.359 if you stole four thousand dollars from this woman and 0:18:02.560 --> 0:18:06.760 ran away from her behind their back, she's not gonna 0:18:06.840 --> 0:18:11.040 be there. She's not gonna be there to marry you later. 0:18:11.200 --> 0:18:18.399 She's gonna be fucking pissed. I later come back to 0:18:18.480 --> 0:18:20.200 my country to marry her and take her with me 0:18:20.280 --> 0:18:23.119 to Portugal. We've had conversations about moving to Europe or 0:18:23.160 --> 0:18:24.760 the US, but she always tells me that she doesn't 0:18:24.760 --> 0:18:27.920 want to leave her family and blah blah blah. However, 0:18:28.040 --> 0:18:30.840 life is tough out here as a young self employed 0:18:32.640 --> 0:18:35.920 man that doesn't belong to a wealthy family. I see 0:18:36.000 --> 0:18:38.760 no future here for our family. Should I tell her 0:18:38.840 --> 0:18:41.440 about my plans now? Or just do it when I 0:18:41.600 --> 0:18:44.600 arrive in Portugal and then we'll see? And then he wrote, 0:18:44.720 --> 0:18:48.879 He literally put twenty exclamation no twenty question marks. He 0:18:49.000 --> 0:18:58.640 also sent me this email five times. Okay, George, George, 0:18:58.760 --> 0:19:05.720 what are you doing? George? What are you doing? George? Okay, 0:19:05.800 --> 0:19:07.520 hold on, let me read, let me reread this again. 0:19:07.600 --> 0:19:11.360 I applied for the visa. Okay, so you already did 0:19:11.400 --> 0:19:15.000 you already spend this money? Okay, George? If you already 0:19:15.040 --> 0:19:17.560 spent this money, you're fuck Okay George, if you already 0:19:17.600 --> 0:19:21.879 spent this money, you have you know, I think if 0:19:21.920 --> 0:19:25.639 you already spent this money, you have no fiance and 0:19:25.760 --> 0:19:29.720 you also owe her four thousand dollars. If you already 0:19:29.760 --> 0:19:32.680 spent this money, then this woman is probably done with you, 0:19:33.680 --> 0:19:39.119 and you you should pay her back to four thousand. 0:19:39.280 --> 0:19:42.040 Fucking What do you? What do you do? I don't 0:19:44.000 --> 0:19:45.760 or you could run away? Sure, you could just keep 0:19:45.840 --> 0:19:48.520 running away and just be on there. I don't know 0:19:48.560 --> 0:19:52.760 if she I don't she probably she probably can't get you. So, yes, 0:19:52.840 --> 0:19:57.200 you just stole four thousand dollars from this lady and 0:19:57.400 --> 0:20:06.600 ran away. What are you doing, George. I'm not gonna 0:20:06.600 --> 0:20:11.320 say your first name, but I should get married in 0:20:11.359 --> 0:20:14.920 seven mother. You you're not getting married. You're you're this 0:20:15.160 --> 0:20:18.160 lady by the because here's the thing this lady you don't. 0:20:18.240 --> 0:20:20.480 I can tell you don't like this lady that much 0:20:21.280 --> 0:20:25.960 by the way that you're talking about it. And if 0:20:26.000 --> 0:20:28.040 you don't like this lady that much and you don't 0:20:28.040 --> 0:20:30.880 want to get I'm gonna just tell you. I'm gonna 0:20:30.960 --> 0:20:32.960 I'm gonna talk to you as if you hadn't spent 0:20:33.119 --> 0:20:36.960 this woman's four thousand dollars. If you don't like this 0:20:37.080 --> 0:20:40.560 lady that much and you're not ready, don't fucking get married. 0:20:40.680 --> 0:20:42.639 Don't fucking get married. Why do people do? Why do 0:20:42.720 --> 0:20:48.680 people make these like giant life decisions that they don't 0:20:48.720 --> 0:20:54.400 want to make what I'd love her to death? Why then? Why? 0:20:54.440 --> 0:20:58.040 Why did you? Well? Okay, George, here's what I'll say. 0:20:58.080 --> 0:20:59.919 If you want If you're like, okay, I already, if 0:20:59.960 --> 0:21:04.479 you if let's say you hear this. I assume you're 0:21:04.480 --> 0:21:06.520 going to hear this because you said you listened every episode, 0:21:07.600 --> 0:21:09.640 and so let's say you hear this and you go, oh, fuck. 0:21:09.720 --> 0:21:12.520 The gecko guy told me I shouldn't have spent I 0:21:12.520 --> 0:21:17.080 shouldn't have stolen four thousand dollars from my fiance, which is, 0:21:17.400 --> 0:21:21.439 I guess what you did? What do you do now? 0:21:23.160 --> 0:21:26.760 I guess, I guess, I guess go to porch. If 0:21:26.800 --> 0:21:28.959 you really want to be able to sleep at night, 0:21:29.080 --> 0:21:33.200 better you go to Portugal and make your money and 0:21:33.359 --> 0:21:35.280 pay her back when you owe her, and then leave 0:21:35.320 --> 0:21:38.080 her alone and start a new life and do whatever 0:21:38.119 --> 0:21:48.080 you're going to do. And also, like so many things 0:21:48.119 --> 0:21:52.919 about this email, George, the fact that you put your 0:21:53.000 --> 0:21:58.000 name before putting don't mention my name. I'm worried about you, George. 0:21:58.520 --> 0:22:00.760 I don't cause why let me I'm worried about I'm 0:22:00.760 --> 0:22:08.240 worried about you because I genuinely think that you didn't 0:22:08.920 --> 0:22:12.120 I'm willing to I'm gonna give you some plausible deniability 0:22:12.200 --> 0:22:14.399 that you didn't realize what you were doing when you 0:22:14.560 --> 0:22:19.600 stole this woman's money. Like I don't think it. I 0:22:19.680 --> 0:22:24.040 don't think that the fact that you put your real 0:22:24.160 --> 0:22:31.159 name before writing don't mention my name. Makes me feel 0:22:31.200 --> 0:22:33.720 as though you were not good at coming to logical 0:22:33.760 --> 0:22:38.800 conclusions about things, both on micro levels, like how you 0:22:39.080 --> 0:22:43.600 structured this email and on macro levels like stealing four 0:22:43.640 --> 0:22:46.560 thousand dollars from your fyance. I don't I'm willing to 0:22:46.600 --> 0:22:48.920 believe that you didn't know what you were doing. And 0:22:50.119 --> 0:22:52.520 I don't think. I don't know there there's a sum 0:22:53.160 --> 0:22:58.480 circuit is loose in your brain that I don't know 0:22:58.560 --> 0:23:01.000 if this podcast, this me answering your email on this 0:23:01.080 --> 0:23:06.639 podcast could be the last line of defense. I don't know. 0:23:06.680 --> 0:23:07.920 I don't know what your life is like. And I 0:23:07.960 --> 0:23:10.119 don't know if you have people in your life that 0:23:11.119 --> 0:23:17.760 can help you re solder together that exposed wire in 0:23:17.840 --> 0:23:21.800 your brain that's causing you to live this way. But 0:23:22.320 --> 0:23:27.600 if you don't, and this is it, I implore you, George, 0:23:28.560 --> 0:23:34.680 to well go talk to a real therapist and just 0:23:34.840 --> 0:23:38.760 try to understand the logical conclusions of things. Try to think. 0:23:39.000 --> 0:23:40.520 I don't know. I don't know how I can get 0:23:40.560 --> 0:23:46.280 you to think. But this is maybe you just I 0:23:46.600 --> 0:23:48.359 don't think you're like a bad guy. I don't well, 0:23:48.400 --> 0:23:54.600 maybe I I don't think you view this as you 0:23:54.760 --> 0:23:59.040 stole four thousand dollars from your fiance. I think you 0:23:59.240 --> 0:24:03.040 view it. You've viewed it as, Oh, I'm just taking 0:24:03.119 --> 0:24:04.760 this so that I can give her more money in 0:24:04.800 --> 0:24:12.800 the future, which is still stealing. But try to understand stuff. God, 0:24:12.880 --> 0:24:18.040 that's a terrible response to this email. But I I 0:24:18.080 --> 0:24:20.000 don't know if I can yourself. What do you self? 0:24:20.080 --> 0:24:22.000 You said you're a young self employed man. What are 0:24:22.000 --> 0:24:26.160 you self employed doing? Okay, George, call into the show 0:24:26.480 --> 0:24:29.320 I stream live, Go follow me on twitch, dot tv, 0:24:29.480 --> 0:24:33.679 slash lyle forever and hit the follow thing and then 0:24:33.720 --> 0:24:35.760 you'll get a notification from when I'm live, and then 0:24:36.320 --> 0:24:38.120 or follow me on Instagram and when you next time 0:24:38.160 --> 0:24:40.480 you see them live. Call me because I want to 0:24:40.520 --> 0:24:43.639 talk to you about this, because I'm I this. I 0:24:44.000 --> 0:24:46.879 want to help you because I think you're something is 0:24:48.840 --> 0:24:51.920 some some neurons in your brain are not firing correctly. 0:24:52.680 --> 0:24:55.240 And I don't actually think I can help you. I 0:24:55.280 --> 0:24:57.399 think I'm insane, and I don't. I don't. No, I'm not. 0:24:57.600 --> 0:24:59.280 I don't think i'm actually am equipped to help you 0:24:59.359 --> 0:25:03.560 at all. But I want to go. I'm curious. Maybe 0:25:03.680 --> 0:25:05.560 maybe maybe I can help you I don't know, but 0:25:06.720 --> 0:25:09.640 call in and give your If you didn't spend the money, 0:25:09.800 --> 0:25:12.639 just give it back immediately. Okay, all right, let's move on. 0:25:13.600 --> 0:25:19.480 What does the chat have to say? What does the 0:25:19.560 --> 0:25:25.560 chat have to say? Someone in the chat said he's 0:25:25.600 --> 0:25:36.200 ashamed and secretly wants you to dox him. That's interesting. Okay, 0:25:36.520 --> 0:25:43.199 all right, all right, whatever, let's keep going. Okay, uh oh. 0:25:43.280 --> 0:25:46.440 I love the subject of this email. This is from Andrew. 0:25:46.640 --> 0:25:54.119 The subject line is masturbation and existential dread. Hi, Lyle, 0:25:54.560 --> 0:25:58.000 I am a fairly average person and I am mostly 0:25:58.119 --> 0:26:02.520 content with my life. What a beautiful sentence. However, I 0:26:02.640 --> 0:26:04.960