Speaker 1: Portions of This American Laugh with Aristotle Atari and Andy Harris.
Speaker 1: The improvised documentary podcast are brought to you by listeners
Speaker 1: like yourself, are esteemed sponsors, and the all powerful, all
Speaker 1: knowing Random Sentence Generator, which inspires the stories you're about
Speaker 1: to hear. Yes, whenever you hear this sound, the next
Speaker 1: sentence you hear is a random sentence provided by our
Speaker 1: revered omnipotent random Sentence Generator. For more This American Laugh.
Speaker 1: Listened to more episodes of This American Laugh, I guess
Speaker 1: and now your first random sentence. She found his complete
Speaker 1: illness interesting. So that's what I did this morning. You
Speaker 1: kind of just watched your serial. It's foggy, Yeah, I
Speaker 1: was starving. Yeah, but this is something about when the
Speaker 1: milk penetrates O D O S. Yeah. Wait wait wait,
Speaker 1: hold on now, I'm I'm not gonna I thought I
Speaker 1: was getting you know, I could listen to you for hours.
Speaker 1: Challenge accepted two hours later. So they were just really
Speaker 1: soggy at this point. Yeah, So I dumped him out
Speaker 1: and sank you didn't even try to eat them? No, no,
Speaker 1: because you know, why why get satisfaction? Why be satisfied
Speaker 1: in life. That's my that's my motto. In fact, in fact,
Speaker 1: I'm so adamant that nobody has ever satisfied. Yeah. Oh,
Speaker 1: that's just where you're going to end. Okay, pretty good,
Speaker 1: right Ah, this is really really going well. Yeah. So,
Speaker 1: um so, do you want me to go from my
Speaker 1: my previous experience if other children's play places? Yeah, sure,
Speaker 1: I honestly I'd love to hear it. But I think
Speaker 1: that we've heard enough. Like, I'm ready to hire you. Really,
Speaker 1: so you got the job working at Fanccenes Children's play Land.
Speaker 1: All right, kids, so make sure you take your shoes
Speaker 1: off one at a time. Why are you talking so slow?
Speaker 1: This is what they hired me for. This is me.
Speaker 1: The people that runs his place can accept me for me.
Speaker 1: I think that you kids can expert. And where is
Speaker 1: your costume? All the other people have a costume on
Speaker 1: and you don't have a costume on. This is the costume.
Speaker 1: I'm myself. I have a block shirt on, and Jean's like,
Speaker 1: not fun. We're the little kids. We like fun, we
Speaker 1: like bright things. Well, then you came to the wrong place. Miraculously,
Speaker 1: his behavior led to a promotion, because now the shifts
Speaker 1: supervisor a Franccenes Kids Children's play area place, Becky here,
Speaker 1: and you didn't need to talk to you from an please,
Speaker 1: I would love to hear its. So you're doing a
Speaker 1: great job, by the way. I mean, the children hate you,
Speaker 1: but yeah, I just love hearing you talk. That's really
Speaker 1: nice of you. Um, this is never easy. Don't because
Speaker 1: you know I've been bumped up and now I'm your superior. Yeah. Um,
Speaker 1: I can't help but notice that at the birthday party. Yeah,
Speaker 1: Reba Witz kid, you joined in to sing Happy Birthday
Speaker 1: to the children. Yeah. Well, I like to sing a lot.
Speaker 1: It's one of my hobbies, and I wanted the children
Speaker 1: to hear. Look, I can't control what you do at home.
Speaker 1: If you want to have fun and be happy at home, however,
Speaker 1: this is not the place for that. Because a new
Speaker 1: new guard in town and Branson's play welcome. No one
Speaker 1: knows the name. I don't know. We should put a
Speaker 1: sign out. We should because I don't even know the name.
Speaker 1: As it turns out, they actually had gone to sign
Speaker 1: shot at one point. All right, so wow, Yes, we
Speaker 1: have all sorts of signs here. We have big signs,
Speaker 1: we have small's eyes, we have on signs, we have
Speaker 1: wood signs with heyte what sort of sign are you
Speaker 1: looking for your particular establishment? Honestly, it doesn't really matter.
Speaker 1: We just um we everyone at the friends scenes. Um, okay,
Speaker 1: I guess we should have started there. What is the
Speaker 1: name of your place? It's I'm trying to remember. Is
Speaker 1: a play place? Do you have a business card or something?
Speaker 1: We never got around to it. We just couldn't think
Speaker 1: of remember the name. And um, you can probably call
Speaker 1: the home office. Okay, call the home office and they'll
Speaker 1: give you the They should know it for sure. Okay,
Speaker 1: what's the number? Seven? Seven? Okay, what's the rest of it?
Speaker 1: Come on, give me the satisfaction giving me the full number.
Speaker 1: You like that, you like what I did? Just now
Speaker 1: gonna get the satisfaction? You know what? That does feel
Speaker 1: strangely good, not being satisfied. This is this American Laugh
Speaker 1: and the host Aristulatory with producer Andy Harris. Our especially
Speaker 1: guest contributor for this week is Katie Marovich. In our show,
Speaker 1: we'll be using our trusty random Sense generator to bring
Speaker 1: you a fully improvised show in three acts. This week's
Speaker 1: theme deception. Sometimes it's impossible to differentiate between who is
Speaker 1: telling the truth and who is telling a dirty, filthy lie?
Speaker 1: Stay with us. Act one. They looked up at the
Speaker 1: sky and saw a million stars. Look you said that one? Good?
Speaker 1: That one? Yeah? What's its name? What's your name? Monica?
Speaker 1: You didn't know that? No? No, no, that's a clue.
Speaker 1: What's your name? Got it? Monica? Is the star? Bryan
Speaker 1: named it after you? That is so? Yeah, that's right.
Speaker 1: It only cost me. I shouldn't tell you. It's kind
Speaker 1: of tacky. Only cost me a twenty bad thousand dollars.
Speaker 1: Why is that's the way? Too much? I mean I
Speaker 1: love it, but that's the way. Do you want money?
Speaker 1: That's that's the going rate for No, there's no way
Speaker 1: that's true. No, No, it's in sky. I mean it's
Speaker 1: it's a part of nature. You trying to say to you? Overmade? Yeah,
Speaker 1: that can't be right. I trusted the guy. He told
Speaker 1: me this. He wrote on a piece of paper, you
Speaker 1: own this star. Okay, let me see the piece of paper. Okay, No,
Speaker 1: this is a map in first of all this and
Speaker 1: he said it's made of paper and McDonald's snaphan and
Speaker 1: it says you, Brian, are the proud owner of a
Speaker 1: star that Okay, he spelled Brian wrong. Keep a brain.
Speaker 1: It's not even your name. Look, that's not the important part.
Speaker 1: The important part is that the star is named after you,
Speaker 1: and I paid top dollar for it. You know, hold on,
Speaker 1: you know what I gotta call it? Can you? Can
Speaker 1: you just look at your star for a minute, your
Speaker 1: expensive star? Yeah? Okay? Hello? Yeah, Hi? Is this uh
Speaker 1: Walt Starvington? Yeah? So? Um Brian, Hey Brian, how you doing, Brian? Brian?
Speaker 1: Be strong? Okay, he so listen to me. You you
Speaker 1: sold me a star, and I can't help but think
Speaker 1: that you might have gouged me on the price. Here. No, no,
Speaker 1: you break your breaking up? Okay, he lost the connection.
Speaker 1: That's not what happened. You heard it. As a speaker,
Speaker 1: he could cut out. He made a noise like the
Speaker 1: phone was cutting out, and then he hung off on Monica. Look,
Speaker 1: I love you. I love you enough to name a
Speaker 1: star after you and spend every bit of money that
Speaker 1: I have, plus take out alone for the breast of
Speaker 1: it that I couldn't what. I love you very much.
Speaker 1: Trust is a fundamental element of life. You gotta trust people, right,
Speaker 1: I mean, you just gotta trust them. Okay, let's just
Speaker 1: finish our champagne. By the way, there's a bottle of
Speaker 1: champagne that you're looking at right here. I bought it
Speaker 1: from a guy sitting outside. I knew it tasted where is.
Speaker 1: Bought it from a guy who said that he was
Speaker 1: born on top of a hay bale at a winery
Speaker 1: and grew up on a winery. And he handed me
Speaker 1: this bottle of champagne, and he told me it was very,
Speaker 1: very good champagne. Did you pay for it? Then mowed
Speaker 1: him several separate times, because there's a limit how many
Speaker 1: times how much money you can venmo a person. Yes,
Speaker 1: let's just say we won't be going on vacation anytime
Speaker 1: soon unless it's to the time share that I that
Speaker 1: I just what your birthday only comes once a year, Brian,
Speaker 1: I bought. I bought a time share from a guy
Speaker 1: I knew, a guy. He handed me these keys that
Speaker 1: he said he just had made to a time share.
Speaker 1: So we can't even go to the time share, is
Speaker 1: what I'm gathering. Well, I don't know. I haven't been
Speaker 1: by that yet. I've never actually seen it. Where is
Speaker 1: the time share supposed to be located? I took a
Speaker 1: picture of him when he was spinning a globe and
Speaker 1: then poked his figure on the globe and he said,
Speaker 1: it's right here, sir, I took a picture of it.
Speaker 1: Let me go through my phone real quick and see
Speaker 1: if I could find a picture. Oh, it's here, it's
Speaker 1: here in Detroit, Brian, check it out. Thank you might
Speaker 1: be a little bit unless dumb means kind, because I'm
Speaker 1: kind enough to buy you a star, I buy you
Speaker 1: a time share, I buy you a half drank bottle
Speaker 1: of champagne or half un drank. It sounds like you
Speaker 1: spent roughly two hundred thousand dollars on my birthday this year,
Speaker 1: and I didn't ask for that. It's not even a
Speaker 1: memorable birthday. Really, you're going to forget this day. I
Speaker 1: don't think you'll ever forgo. I just mean it's eight.
Speaker 1: Who cares about you? And I both know is a
Speaker 1: very important number to me because that was the age
Speaker 1: of the guy who needs a kidney, and I promised
Speaker 1: to him that I would give him my kidney, and
Speaker 1: I signed a document and said that I would give
Speaker 1: him his kid And that's how old he is, and
Speaker 1: that's how I guess. This is just a long way
Speaker 1: of me trying to tell you that I promised my kidney.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, we need to probably speed this up
Speaker 1: a little bit because the duck is scheduled to grubbing
Speaker 1: in a four hours. Brian. This is all very nice,
Speaker 1: but I just I can't be with someone like you. Sadly,
Speaker 1: Monica and Brian ended up hiding ways. I'll drop you
Speaker 1: off at the hospital. It sounds like you have to
Speaker 1: go right, and we we took my car the hospital.
Speaker 1: No no, no, no. The surgery isn't at the hospital.
Speaker 1: The surgery is that a Is that a casino? Oh? Yeah, yeah, Brian,
Speaker 1: I can't believe I didn't see the signs earlier and
Speaker 1: wake up with your way earlier. You realized that she
Speaker 1: should have noticed the signs on their first date together, Brian, Monica,
Speaker 1: I recognized you. You have the yellow heat on you
Speaker 1: and you have the red road. Yes, I do, well,
Speaker 1: I did have. I did have. I did have a
Speaker 1: dozen of them. But I kept going around to every
Speaker 1: woman and said, should I give you the throws? And
Speaker 1: they said yeah, sure, so eleven other women here generous.
Speaker 1: Oh you know, I just I just trust people whenever
Speaker 1: they whenever they tell me that they want something. I
Speaker 1: just there's something about it that seems like it could
Speaker 1: be a red flag and I'm going to ignore it. No,
Speaker 1: it's a rose, it's a red yeah. Oh yeah cool.
Speaker 1: So should we get tapas high folks? Um? Can I
Speaker 1: get you started with something to drink? Um? Yeah? What what?
Speaker 1: What will you have? Oh? I guess I'll do a
Speaker 1: singry that sounds good. Um? Could you also buy me
Speaker 1: as Angria? Money's a little tight right now because I
Speaker 1: totally I've got this. I've I've got to paint drop.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, so I used to too, but oh was
Speaker 1: that recent? Yeah? It's it's like just your basic run
Speaker 1: of the mill downsizing where boss calls you to the
Speaker 1: office and he says, uh, we're letting you go because
Speaker 1: you stole a palate of printers, you know, downsize that
Speaker 1: kind thing that happened. That could be a red flag,
Speaker 1: but I'm gonna ignoring. I'm gonna ignore him. I found
Speaker 1: some footage of the incident in question. Bryant my office
Speaker 1: right now. Yeah, you want to explain to eat by
Speaker 1: your van is filled with epsom printers. Yeah, Sheila told
Speaker 1: me that the company was doing a printer sweep steaks printers,
Speaker 1: sweepast the sweepstakes, yea, and everybody gets at everybody pallet printers.
Speaker 1: Both of you should be ashamed of yourself. What Brian,
Speaker 1: you're fired for stealing a pallet of printers. You're your numbers,
Speaker 1: your number of last quarter. You're you're fine, but but
Speaker 1: but really, can we can we stop trying to convince
Speaker 1: the gullibol to steal stupid? It was really yeah, it'll
Speaker 1: last time. Okay, no more, probably, Okay, thank you. I
Speaker 1: think across your other friends. On the other hand, got
Speaker 1: me take your shoes off. Okay, Really that's a serious
Speaker 1: You already ruined Brian's life. I know he's stupid, but
Speaker 1: still you can't go around convincing the stupid people that
Speaker 1: work here to steal. It's not I mean, it might
Speaker 1: be fun for you, but it's not fun for that.
Speaker 1: But it's not fun. Three right, all right, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: let you get back to work, I promise days later.
Speaker 1: Yes I can't, but I did it again. They did
Speaker 1: it again, didn't that? Yeah, I'm looking at the security.
Speaker 1: Don't give me one good reason why I shouldn't fire you.
Speaker 1: You literally came in here and did the exact same
Speaker 1: thing that I asked you not to do. That's the reason.
Speaker 1: Because you want the job. Job, You're gonna have to
Speaker 1: give me a better reason. Please, I can't say a
Speaker 1: little scamp. All right, really this is the last. If
Speaker 1: it happens again, the authorities might be called. They might
Speaker 1: all right, okay here moments later, Yeah, why did Okay? Okay,
Speaker 1: you know what. Here's what I want you to do.
Speaker 1: I want you to go out there and I want
Speaker 1: you to promise me you're going to keep convincing people
Speaker 1: to steal things. That's what I want. Okay, So you
Speaker 1: would go out there, you do do a real bad
Speaker 1: job out there. You convince everyone to steal things. Okay,
Speaker 1: it's not any fun. I was holding that. I was
Speaker 1: holding that you would go back into the into the
Speaker 1: warehouse and you would not convince everyone there's steal things,
Speaker 1: and then I wouldn't have to talk to you again
Speaker 1: about that. Yeah, I didn't understand. There was a little
Speaker 1: convoluted like from brain to mouth. I could tell that
Speaker 1: you and the listener we're going to hard. I wounderstanding
Speaker 1: what I was doing. I've gotten there, ye, jailer, is
Speaker 1: that my watching goddam coming up back? To the first
Speaker 1: word from our esteemed sponsors, stay with us to interview.
Speaker 1: That's welcome this week's guest contributor to Katie Marovich. Katie, welcome, Hi,
Speaker 1: thanks for having me, Thanks for being here. So how
Speaker 1: long have you been listening to the show? Um? About
Speaker 1: a day? Try again? How long? Longer? Long? Yeah? Since
Speaker 1: the beginning? Right, Oh, I've been listening since episode one.
Speaker 1: So you're a die hard I'm a die hard fan.
Speaker 1: Do you remember what happened in that first episode? Yeah?
Speaker 1: I remember the theme was trust in episode one? And um,
Speaker 1: what was your favorite scene from that episode? I'm curious,
Speaker 1: probably the second scene. What happened to that? Um? Sorry
Speaker 1: somebody was Yeah, I was like a brief moment and
Speaker 1: but no, I definitely we actually we actually have that
Speaker 1: scene in the archives. Can I would love to hear
Speaker 1: it and just kind of remind myself what let's hear
Speaker 1: that these ah, excuse me, excuse becuse me. I'm the
Speaker 1: one's coughing and not, like you know what, agree to disagree.
Speaker 1: I'm the one who's coughing more. Okay, I would say
Speaker 1: that you're coughing a little bit louder than I'm coughing.
Speaker 1: But that doesn't mean that I'm not coughing. The scale
Speaker 1: of one to ten, one being me being the one
Speaker 1: who's being the coffing coughing man, and then ten being
Speaker 1: me mostly a bunch of coughing, I'd probably say I'm
Speaker 1: a ten, I'm a t No, no, I'd say you're
Speaker 1: like a negative negative, Okay, I've of coughing. Well, okay, look,
Speaker 1: this isn't a competition, but if it was, I would
Speaker 1: be victorious and I would be hoisting the trophy over
Speaker 1: my head that is filled with coughs. Okay, anyway, so
Speaker 1: what was that I still had a little bit of
Speaker 1: cough did you? Yeah? Actually I still had a little
Speaker 1: bit of calls really, because your eyes weren't really squinty
Speaker 1: like one does you were pretending No, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: look listen, look, listen, look yeah, look say it. I
Speaker 1: didn't come here to be questioned about my dedication to
Speaker 1: the craft of coughing. All right, interesting, now, look both
Speaker 1: adults here. I think it would be best if we
Speaker 1: just moved on accepted the fact the reality that I
Speaker 1: was the one who coughed the most and the best.
Speaker 1: And first, Yeah, that was a really good I loved
Speaker 1: that episode. Really good? Was I the guess it sounded
Speaker 1: like me right? You know what? I think it might
Speaker 1: have been. I think it might have been. Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: so funny. That makes sense why you would have listened
Speaker 1: since day one, because you obviously listened to my episode. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like like a quarterback watching the game film, you would
Speaker 1: have gone back first studied it to see. I've been
Speaker 1: in a couple episodes though, have you? Yeah? What what other?
Speaker 1: That one about um about outer space? The outer space
Speaker 1: episode Space Extravagance, so that we have a Space Extravagance. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I think that was years ago. That was more than
Speaker 1: years I was about a decade ago. That mistaken producer
Speaker 1: Andy had the episode in the archives he usually does,
Speaker 1: So let's play it. Space is beautiful. It's very fast.
Speaker 1: We've got first space, beautiful space. I'm so sorry what
Speaker 1: I thought it was off book of book. I'm not.
Speaker 1: You're not awful Space Extravaganza. This is a musical. You
Speaker 1: knew that. I'm real sorry, you're throwing me off. I'm
Speaker 1: really sorry. Can we go back to one? You know?
Speaker 1: I don't know? No, come on, you can trust me.
Speaker 1: I'm not going to let you down like I did
Speaker 1: at the NASA. Yeah, when we made when we pitched,
Speaker 1: we pitched the musical to musical to NASA. I'm not
Speaker 1: going to do it, okay, okay, okay, okay, but you
Speaker 1: better go to write this space. It is beautiful, space, beautiful,
Speaker 1: and it's it's beauty and it's in its plan. It's
Speaker 1: in the space. It's No. I didn't forget you're making
Speaker 1: us look like no, no, no, no, no, no no.
Speaker 1: I was so I got choked up because a song
Speaker 1: that we've been working on for weeks, it's really it's
Speaker 1: just such a beautiful song you wrote about space. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it is beautiful and I did write it, and you're
Speaker 1: ruining it. That was an intense episode and that scene. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's what one us the Webby Webby Award. I can't
Speaker 1: believe we got a Webby I know they give it
Speaker 1: Webbies for podcasts, right, yeah, because we got one so well,
Speaker 1: I mean we of course I'm a part of that.
Speaker 1: I think we were the lifetime achievement. Yeah, yeah, for sure.
Speaker 1: So Katie, tell us about yourself. What do you do.
Speaker 1: I'm a comedian and writer actor, very unique out here
Speaker 1: and not a lot of people doing that in Los Angeles.
Speaker 1: But yeah, and I've been out here for about eight years,
Speaker 1: nine years doing that and you moved here from Chicago,
Speaker 1: so sad of Chicago? Really? Yeah? But do you decide
Speaker 1: to pack up and move to Los Angeles? Well, I
Speaker 1: knew that I wanted to be a writer. I thought
Speaker 1: I was going to be a journalist and kind of
Speaker 1: fell into comedy. I was lucky because as a child,
Speaker 1: my parents would bring me to like Second City. I oh,
Speaker 1: and I was like really seeing some great groups early on,
Speaker 1: like Kokani Social Clubs improvised Shakespeare, like some of the
Speaker 1: best improvisers, and that definitely had a big impact. And yeah,
Speaker 1: so I just I honestly like used comedy as a
Speaker 1: little kid to avoid getting made fun of, like a
Speaker 1: defense mechanism, and it worked out. You know, we actually
Speaker 1: have in the archives, we have you going to that
Speaker 1: first improv show at Second City when you were a child.
Speaker 1: That's why did you know that we have that? That's
Speaker 1: so we're you have that you would have Alright, Gaty
Speaker 1: for your seventh birthday party, we're taking you do improv sho. Now, look,
Speaker 1: hopefully this is gonna be appropriate for little child years.
Speaker 1: I'm so excited. Hope you will be Yeah. Now, let
Speaker 1: me explain to you how this works. Okay, you go in,
Speaker 1: they ask you for a for a word or a phrase.
Speaker 1: Sometimes they ask for a location that can fit inside
Speaker 1: this room that is contrived and the UM I don't
Speaker 1: like that. I'm not a fan of that because it's
Speaker 1: basically like you're you're building the scene for him. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so they asked for a word, You'll yell out a word, okay,
Speaker 1: everybody where where, laffy taffy. Can we get a one
Speaker 1: word suggestion? Please? Dad? I got to give the word Dad.
Speaker 1: I gave the words could we We usually don't do this,
Speaker 1: but if we could, uh, we could get a different
Speaker 1: suggestion please? Hello christ And I gave the word again.
Speaker 1: You know, I'm gonna ask for an unprecedented third suggestion
Speaker 1: if we could just uh dick and towards freaking. It
Speaker 1: was a very special moment. That was a good memory.
Speaker 1: It was nice to hear your formative years. What was
Speaker 1: your first job out here in l A. I was
Speaker 1: an intern at College Humor. Well, like I said, I
Speaker 1: just wanted to be a writer. But then someone mentioned, like,
Speaker 1: you have to do improv classes. So I started taking
Speaker 1: improv classes at the UCV as you do. And UM,
Speaker 1: I don't know. I really fell in love with performing
Speaker 1: and so um, I think they kind of noticed those
Speaker 1: a little weird little funny at college humor, and they
Speaker 1: started letting me sit in on the writer's room and um,
Speaker 1: I get to like act and write and eventually became
Speaker 1: a like a full time cast member writer. So I
Speaker 1: did that for a long time. We actually have you
Speaker 1: sitting in on the writer's meetings when they let you
Speaker 1: come in and and sit in. Wow. Um, so let's
Speaker 1: let's hear that that's a new as well. Alright, everybody,
Speaker 1: we'd like to, uh, can we get a nice warm
Speaker 1: welcome for uh, for Katie, she's uh, you here and
Speaker 1: she is going to uh she's she's you know, sorry
Speaker 1: doing it doing a show. She's going to pitch some
Speaker 1: stuff to us. Okay, go pitch okay. Um wow. Um.
Speaker 1: So it's it's like a guy and um he goes
Speaker 1: into work and he realizes he he has two peers
Speaker 1: of underwear on um instead of the usual one, and
Speaker 1: um uh once hey, everybody, enjoy your just hang back,
Speaker 1: take take five, sit on your monster energy drinks and
Speaker 1: whatever the hell do you college? You guys, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: talk to Kati. Katie. What are you doing? I'm pitching.
Speaker 1: I'm funny. That's a pit two pairs underwear, I mean,
Speaker 1: because usually you wear one parent. I understand what unders
Speaker 1: in the game, but but why why why? That's the
Speaker 1: kind of that's the kind of revolutionary mind blowing comedy
Speaker 1: you bring into the tape. I mean, just trust me,
Speaker 1: this is this, This sketch is gonna go over. Really, Katie.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna let you pitch one more time, okay, And
Speaker 1: depending on how this next pitch goes, maybe I'll let
Speaker 1: you pitch the third time. Okay, but peace, do not
Speaker 1: embarrass me in front of my I'm going to kill it. Okay.
Speaker 1: I told you I'm good at that. All right, all right, everybody,
Speaker 1: let's sip of those M E D drink. You know what,
Speaker 1: Thank you? Thank you? Going to college for this? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I did for I did comedy for this, really, yes,
Speaker 1: I did comedy. I didn't think people I did. I did. Okay,
Speaker 1: Katie's got another pitch, everybody, all right, come on, wow,
Speaker 1: what's let's do? Okay? Um, so this one is an
Speaker 1: autobiographical Okay, al right, guys, come listen. Up and Jeff, Jeff, Jeff, Jeff, listen, Jeff,
Speaker 1: will you shut the funk up for one? Listen? Thank you? Anyway,
Speaker 1: it's about a girl um and she's all um. She
Speaker 1: realized she has low blood sugar and she just full
Speaker 1: on fame and then that's where it ends. Uh yeah, yeah, Katie, Sam,
Speaker 1: I told you you'd love it and did that? Did
Speaker 1: give me a little bit? Yeah? Anybody else, anybody else
Speaker 1: have anything they want to add to this? Yeah, Jeff,
Speaker 1: here have a question for the newbe Why exactly do
Speaker 1: do say? Can you shut up for once? The first
Speaker 1: day here? How do you know all the time? Looking?
Speaker 1: How do you know that? How do you know that?
Speaker 1: I like talking all the time because people when they're
Speaker 1: trying to talk, how do you know it? What about me? Jeff?
Speaker 1: You're stow? That was? That was a rough first day
Speaker 1: just saying I think about that really tossed in the
Speaker 1: deep end too. Yeah, they did, because they don't don't
Speaker 1: normally do that. I have the assistant. They didn't. They
Speaker 1: don't just say like, hey, of pitches, that was? What
Speaker 1: are you working on these days? Now? I'm making a
Speaker 1: bunch of short films. I just made my third one
Speaker 1: last month and um just writing a ton really, that's it.
Speaker 1: Anything to plug? No, I don't have anything to plug.
Speaker 1: I mean you can follow me on things, and then
Speaker 1: I'll talk about things that I have to plug. Let's
Speaker 1: wear the It is um at Katie Mirovich on Twitter
Speaker 1: and Instagram, and I'm also on tik stock and it's
Speaker 1: the worst garbage ever. Know it is, um So don't
Speaker 1: follow that one, but it is. You know, I'm on there.
Speaker 1: We actually have we actually have one of your most
Speaker 1: viewed TikTok in our archives. So do we have to
Speaker 1: watch it? As as the producer of the show, it's
Speaker 1: my job you have delve into the life of the
Speaker 1: guests beforehand. Actually pulled it up. Okay, Okay, So this
Speaker 1: first dance move, it's a lot of um, just kind
Speaker 1: of like silly arms. I would call it. Have waffle
Speaker 1: iron in one hand, baffle in one hand, uh and
Speaker 1: an eggo waffle in the other hand. So that's already
Speaker 1: already made. It's already made. I didn't need that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: well it's a dance. Yes, I'm doing just very silly arms.
Speaker 1: Akay at this point. Now I'm just doing some interesting gyrations.
Speaker 1: Explained the hat to me. The hat, well, the hat
Speaker 1: isn't so much a hat as a flower pot, but
Speaker 1: it's I'm wearing it as a hat. Is that like?
Speaker 1: Is that like the new one? No, it's not. Um,
Speaker 1: I'd say that my comedy is hard, and that's kind
Speaker 1: of what I'm doing here. Why are the clean xboxes underfeed? Well,
Speaker 1: that's because I that's exactly why. Yeah. So when I'm
Speaker 1: at home, I like to put the xboxes on. Um,
Speaker 1: and I obviously shot this at home, so that's why
Speaker 1: that's happening. Oh and look it's the fifteen seconds are up.
Speaker 1: It's only fifteen seconds. Yeah, that's pretty good, thank you.
Speaker 1: I um, yeah, I love to dance. Yeah, yeah, and
Speaker 1: you know what, I think that I think the listener
Speaker 1: is in for a treat. Whenever they checked the rest
Speaker 1: of the TikTok though, for sure and yeah again at
Speaker 1: Katie Marvich Um, incredible dances, Katie Marovitch, thank you so
Speaker 1: much for joining us this week. Thank you for having
Speaker 1: me coming up at three. The first the word from
Speaker 1: our sponsors who make this high quality program possible. Stay
Speaker 1: with us at three. The team members were hired to
Speaker 1: tet apart since they wore their hair in a bodytail?
Speaker 1: Could I help you find anything you look for? Anything
Speaker 1: in particular, like a certain resolution, or like certain size,
Speaker 1: or like um sort thinking, I'm sorry, was I talking
Speaker 1: to you just like two minutes ago? Or was I
Speaker 1: talking to I don't think so, Garrett, Garrett. Sorry, I
Speaker 1: was talking to it Michael right here. Here's what I'm
Speaker 1: gonna do. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go back in
Speaker 1: the back. I'm gonna check and see if we have
Speaker 1: any sixty inches that aren't the floor modd okay, because
Speaker 1: you have fingerprints all over with people like to walk
Speaker 1: up and touch screen TV. Stupid, just stupid. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: want to go check it back right back, Garrett, Garrett, Garrett,
Speaker 1: got it. Somebody helping you. Garrett Garrett's helping you know,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I thought you were Garrett. No, no, no,
Speaker 1: I'm what's your name? I'm Blair, Yeah, I'm sorry. Is
Speaker 1: Garrett helping you? Yeah, Garrett was helping me. But I
Speaker 1: thought looking for then Michael was helping You're looking for
Speaker 1: Michael was hope? Was Garrett helping you or was Michael
Speaker 1: helping you? Okay, So I think what happened is Michael
Speaker 1: was helping me, and then Michael went in the back
Speaker 1: to go look for TV's and Garrett started helping me.
Speaker 1: Garrot one in the back to go look at TV's
Speaker 1: and no, I'm talking to Blair. Seems well anyway, I'm
Speaker 1: hoping you're okay. I'm okay. I hope they're okay. When
Speaker 1: did they go back there? Maybe like two minutes ago
Speaker 1: for Garrett and maybe like five minutes ago for Mike.
Speaker 1: I want to check on them, okay, okay, I can,
Speaker 1: I can. I I just want to say, somebody helping
Speaker 1: you out, Blair. Blair's helping you out? Are you player?
Speaker 1: Who is Timoth? Timoth? Yeah? I haven't seen Blair in
Speaker 1: a long time. Well, Blair, I think was just out
Speaker 1: here and I think we were talking. What do you
Speaker 1: look like? Um? He looked literally exactly like you? Is it?
Speaker 1: Quadruplet situation? Blair was about Garrett Garrett okay. So here's
Speaker 1: what happened was I was talking to him, Michael okay,
Speaker 1: and then Michael he went in the back to look
Speaker 1: for my sixty five in TV and then whoa, whoa, whoa.
Speaker 1: We went to the back. I assume you have some
Speaker 1: sort of warehouse back there. We can look for the
Speaker 1: TVs that don't have the We were talking about the
Speaker 1: smudge prints on the on the television when people walk
Speaker 1: up to the floor models, and why did they touch this?
Speaker 1: I have no idea. What the stupid, stupid, idiot, idiot boy. Okay,
Speaker 1: so you're trying to tell me that they went to
Speaker 1: the quote back, either Garrett or Michael, who said I'll
Speaker 1: go to the back to look for a sixty five
Speaker 1: in Okay, So I'm not sure. I'm sorry. What is
Speaker 1: literally shaking himth Timothy Timoth, I'm sorry, literally shaking here.
Speaker 1: I think I got to tell you something. Yeah, what happened?
Speaker 1: The back burned down five years ago. They didn't rebuild. No, really,
Speaker 1: nobody goes to the back. Nobody's supposed to go to
Speaker 1: the back, okay, by I had to imagine there's something
Speaker 1: back there. No, nothing's back there. We were told in
Speaker 1: the team meeting this morning, okay, not you ever go
Speaker 1: in the back, just like we're told every morning. And
Speaker 1: they hired four new guys, Garrett, Michael, Blair Blair, and
Speaker 1: then you, Timoth. There's another there's another four. We haven't met.
Speaker 1: Brian's over. We haven't met him he's a interest somewhere.
Speaker 1: He might have gone to the back me Timmoth, I
Speaker 1: guess I'm not quite understanding why you're so it's not
Speaker 1: like the black hole. No, you want to go investigate? Yeah, honestly,
Speaker 1: I'm unapproved to you that it's not a black hole. Brian. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna take this customer to hell swears, and I
Speaker 1: want to tell him that we're going. Yeah, I got
Speaker 1: that investigate. We were told the meeting this morning, going back. Right,
Speaker 1: let's go check it out. Okay, I'm not scared at all, truly, No,
Speaker 1: because I don't. Let's just go back. Okay, this has
Speaker 1: got to be here, right, timmyth Yeah, what are you
Speaker 1: doing here? Uh? We're going to the back, coming to
Speaker 1: look for you. Blair yeah, Garrett yeah, Michael Yeah, we
Speaker 1: were all just coming to the back to check on
Speaker 1: the TVs. Why. Yeah, I would like my sixty five.
Speaker 1: The problem you didn't hear in the meeting they say
Speaker 1: not to ever go in the back because of a portal. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I trusted boss when he told us ever going to
Speaker 1: feel like I shouldn't be here anymore. No, hang back, hangback.
Speaker 1: You should you have to be here for it. Just
Speaker 1: seems like you're having a bit of a moment and
Speaker 1: I don't want to approaches manager to talk about it. Yo.
Speaker 1: What yeah, Greg, can you do a little three six? Yeah?
Speaker 1: You're noticing my party? It's coming in the top knock. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I love it. Yeah, it looks good. It looks like
Speaker 1: what it looks like, A like a pony's sale. That's
Speaker 1: what I said. You know what, I gotta tell you.
Speaker 1: You're not gonna believe this. I'm just now realizing that's
Speaker 1: why they call it a pony literally right down now,
Speaker 1: like just in this second, I realized that's why they
Speaker 1: call it. That looks like a tailed it. Yeah, what's
Speaker 1: going on? How are you back here? How come you
Speaker 1: told me earlier that we couldn't go to the room, dude,
Speaker 1: and I wasn't. Joe. You said that it burned down, Yeah,
Speaker 1: that it happened. Well, why did you say that, Joe?
Speaker 1: You're worried. I got to come on, we're the best part.
Speaker 1: We have to have a back. Well that's what I
Speaker 1: thought when you told it to me. And then and
Speaker 1: then this woman is looking for TVs and um, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, Should I leave? You know, you gotta be
Speaker 1: shouldn't be here. You know, you have to be here. Okay,
Speaker 1: it just seems like you're having but you're but but
Speaker 1: if I'm talking about you, you're included in the in
Speaker 1: the conversation that I want you to be here, because
Speaker 1: I don't think it's right to talk about somebody behind
Speaker 1: someone's pony. Yes, did you notice I put my hair
Speaker 1: in a pony pail? And I really appreciate that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I was feeling like I wasn't fitting in. And do
Speaker 1: you have any previous experience? Um in uh, because we're
Speaker 1: short staffed, Because do you have any prior experience with
Speaker 1: I'm actually currently a children's surgeon and I'm just on
Speaker 1: my lunch break. But you know what, I only have
Speaker 1: a couple of surgeries this afternoon and I could I
Speaker 1: could probably swing it. You want to work here? Yeah,
Speaker 1: you know I do. Well, we'll chet chat after we
Speaker 1: straighten out this. Okay, okay, I'll just stand right here. Okay, cool. Anyway,
Speaker 1: why did you say that shit about the back room?
Speaker 1: Like I said, I was joking, like, it's not really
Speaker 1: my fault if you took that seriously, like that's on you. Yeah, Okay,
Speaker 1: well I guess that this shame on me. Yeah. Luck
Speaker 1: later I checked down footage from the Children's Surgery Clinics
Speaker 1: operating table. So anyway, Um, this is actually going to
Speaker 1: be my last surgeon job. But you're supposed to scrub
Speaker 1: in for our sergeant job tomorrow morning, right, I know,
Speaker 1: And I'm going to skip that surgeon's job. Excuse me?
Speaker 1: Who else is going to do the surgeon's job if
Speaker 1: you don't do the surgeon job tomorrow. There's a twenty
Speaker 1: eight year old who is expecting canney transplant tomorrow. Are
Speaker 1: you You're just I'm just supposed to tell well, it's
Speaker 1: not really a children. How do you know what his intellect?
Speaker 1: That's a very good point. That's your point. I would
Speaker 1: argue that a twenty eight year old is a children
Speaker 1: and a twenty nine year old can be your children. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and I'm not done listing numbers. I'm sorry. I was
Speaker 1: just gonna say I'm a fifty four children and I um, okay,
Speaker 1: I'm I'm just I'm listening. That's is that my I've
Speaker 1: been told in the past that I have a bad
Speaker 1: like listening. Yes, I will say it looks like a scowl.
Speaker 1: You look quite angry at Okay, I'm not it made me.
Speaker 1: I'm not. I'm not angry with you about that. I'm
Speaker 1: angry with you that you're just leaving the surgery place
Speaker 1: with surgery. Got a better job, Okay, I'm gonna be
Speaker 1: working at the best Buy breast bar. Yes, some place
Speaker 1: doesn't even have a back room. They have something back
Speaker 1: that they don't Why do people know? I went there
Speaker 1: and I was looking for TVs. Yes, I was looking
Speaker 1: for a big sixty furniture TV. And I went in
Speaker 1: there and I was like, do you have anything that
Speaker 1: doesn't have smudgles all over it? Because a lot of
Speaker 1: what I don't get it. I don't really People are
Speaker 1: so used to like phones and touching, touching, touching, they
Speaker 1: think everything is a touch screen. You know what, I
Speaker 1: was driving here? I saw somebody client. You know those
Speaker 1: electronic billboards that they have that that like the they're
Speaker 1: they're they're they're electronic. Yes, all right, So I was
Speaker 1: climbing up the billboard. They had climbed up there and
Speaker 1: they were touching the billboard like it was a test crate.
Speaker 1: Went why why why? So anyway you're going, are you're
Speaker 1: leaving us? Yes? So I can't make the cergein surgeons
Speaker 1: stop tomorrow year old. Okay, well, I'll try to break
Speaker 1: it to him gently. Yes, we're going to miss you.
Speaker 1: This child's chest is open, so I should probably get
Speaker 1: to it right. Yeah, I gotta tell you, am I
Speaker 1: off the record here, there's no record. I'm not really
Speaker 1: feeling super confident that the donor kidney donor tomorrow is
Speaker 1: going to show up because I think that I think
Speaker 1: that he might be onto the fact that kind of
Speaker 1: a black market operation here. So is it that guy?
Speaker 1: I think his name was Brian, Brian. He seemed real
Speaker 1: dumb to me, super dumb. Something tells me that he's
Speaker 1: gonna wise up and not come in for the surgery.
Speaker 1: So I say, there spitballing here. Yeah, I say that
Speaker 1: we leave this kid's cavity open. Okay, let's see how
Speaker 1: nights here goes. If it wanted, we got an extra kiddy,
Speaker 1: I mean, you got a kidney. It's just kind of
Speaker 1: let's just kind of doctor. Yes, I know exactly what
Speaker 1: you're saying. Do you all right? Are you sure? I'm
Speaker 1: saying we showed it in to finish operating on this
Speaker 1: child here? Oh, we can have his kidney maybe? Oh no, no, no, yes,
Speaker 1: I got that. I got that. I got that. No,
Speaker 1: I did get that. Yes, all right, I also will
Speaker 1: miss you. Yeah. The day passed and it was time
Speaker 1: for the surgery. Ryan, you did show up. Oh no, no, no,
Speaker 1: that's fine. Um do you want mine anyway? Just because
Speaker 1: I'm here, my girlfriend broke up with me. I don't
Speaker 1: really have any reason to live. Oh well you can
Speaker 1: still live with just want to hear kidneys? Yeah, so
Speaker 1: that's not going to kill you. It's not No, that's
Speaker 1: not going to kill you, you know what. I just Um,
Speaker 1: I have shoot this fast because I have to go
Speaker 1: to my new job at best A. Yeah. I just
Speaker 1: stopped in quickly. You know. They don't even have a
Speaker 1: back room there. No, they do. That's a The guy
Speaker 1: who sold me the car with a broken window that
Speaker 1: he had to that he had to hot wire. Um,
Speaker 1: he sold it to me for five hundred thousand dollars,
Speaker 1: he told me, because I bought it from from the
Speaker 1: parking lot at the best Buy. The guy told me
Speaker 1: that he they didn't have back room with well anyway, Um,
Speaker 1: I don't work here, he was lying. And I don't
Speaker 1: work here anymore. I'm like I said, just gathering my
Speaker 1: box and I've got to all I shouldn't really be here. Well,
Speaker 1: thank you for the producer Andy and I especially guest
Speaker 1: Katy Merrilitch. I'm you know, sorry. And this was this
Speaker 1: American laugh during the Next Time