Speaker 1: Black hairdressers should have full health insurance.
Speaker 2: I'm talking PPO.
Speaker 1: They have to be deemed essential workers because I'll tell
Speaker 1: you what in the deep deep quarantine like for sure,
Speaker 1: like EMT workers and shit. I was banging on pots,
Speaker 1: but when I saw a black hairdresser with some bags
Speaker 1: of hair, I was like, bang, bang, bang on the pot.
Speaker 2: I appreciate you.
Speaker 3: Welcome to adulting. I'm Jordan Carlos. I am joined by
Speaker 3: my co from Go, Michelle Buteau. Michelle, how are you?
Speaker 4: Oh, heo?
Speaker 5: What's been going on?
Speaker 2: What's been going on? I am part of this.
Speaker 1: Unfortunate club of parents that have seen.
Speaker 2: Their child in distress.
Speaker 1: I took my family to kids and husband down to
Speaker 1: Miami to see my dad for his eighty third birthday.
Speaker 2: And on the plane to him, I know, happy birthday, Papa.
Speaker 1: On the plane, my son threw up three times and
Speaker 1: passed out. And yes, and so I knew what to
Speaker 1: do because I'm a fainter. I started fainting, and if
Speaker 1: you're a fainter, I feel you, you know, like it's crazy.
Speaker 1: I started fainting when I was little, like in church,
Speaker 1: standing up in the back when there's no seats and stuff.
Speaker 2: But that was the scariest shit ever.
Speaker 1: And yeah, man, it's like you're not even like someone's
Speaker 1: friend where you're like it'll be okay, or like someone's
Speaker 1: sitting in the back row like you got the sis.
Speaker 1: It's like, no, you're the mom, this is your child.
Speaker 1: You feel helpless. You were stuck in the air. This
Speaker 1: is the time where you try to see if there's
Speaker 1: a doctor on board. You know, all the parents out
Speaker 1: there who have been through like the not allergy, the this,
Speaker 1: the that, the hospital, like I ooh, baby, I feel
Speaker 1: for you.
Speaker 2: We are in it together, and fuck, we're gonna be
Speaker 2: all right.
Speaker 3: Set this up for me. What happened? Like he was
Speaker 3: he was blowing cheerios everywhere, like what happened? It was
Speaker 3: the altitude.
Speaker 1: We had a very early flight, so we woke up
Speaker 1: super early, so he was too tired and groggy to
Speaker 1: have breakfast.
Speaker 2: So that's lesson learned.
Speaker 1: No first flights of the day, right, get a good
Speaker 1: night's sleep and wake up, have breakfast, get yourself a
Speaker 1: late afternoon flight or an evening flight.
Speaker 2: So that was number one. Number two. I do believe
Speaker 2: the altitude was a little too high.
Speaker 1: I felt it because I am very sensitive to to
Speaker 1: high altitude, like, okay, you know I've performed in Aspen
Speaker 1: and Veil before and ooh ooh baby, very nice. Ooh,
Speaker 1: but like blacking out after one glass of wine. I'm like,
Speaker 1: you mean o to like two bottles?
Speaker 5: What is this like?
Speaker 2: On stage?
Speaker 1: Out of breath, just standing there, I'm like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: what's going I don't know. Shout out to musicians that
Speaker 1: perform in high altitude places, because I know you see stars.
Speaker 1: I think we were going high to avoid turbulence. And
Speaker 1: he really wasn't drinking water, he really Yeah. The pass
Speaker 1: out part was like, no, ma'am, not on my watch.
Speaker 1: I felt like I did, feel like Viola Davis and Kingwoman.
Speaker 1: I'm like, no, no, well, so yeah, I protect my
Speaker 1: baby at all costs. But then what comes with that
Speaker 1: is like the residual anxiety otis is like, hey, my
Speaker 1: mom going on the plane, does that mean I'm gonna
Speaker 1: be sick again? And so it's really wild. It's really wild.
Speaker 1: But wow, what a love, what a trooper. Shout out
Speaker 1: to people on the plane who just like held it
Speaker 1: down for us, stayed calm and non judgmental for my
Speaker 1: little booboo getting sick because people don't you know, it's
Speaker 1: very divisive, like people like kids or they don't. I
Speaker 1: could tell the people that didn't like kids. They were like,
Speaker 1: I hope it's gonna be okay. I said, thank you
Speaker 1: so much. That's the thing too, It's like, oh, it's
Speaker 1: like breaking up in public.
Speaker 3: Hold on, I mean all you had is like those
Speaker 3: little drink napkins to stop it up. There's never enough
Speaker 3: of those.
Speaker 1: I'm a twin. I'm a twin mom, and I come
Speaker 1: fucking ready. So I already had a pack of wipes,
Speaker 1: like in my bra like I'm not fucking around. I
Speaker 1: have blankets, I have a change of clothes, Like I'm
Speaker 1: out here prepared.
Speaker 2: I'm a catastrophizer. So I'm already.
Speaker 1: You want to have catastrophizers as friends because we've already
Speaker 1: thought about it and we are already fucking on it,
Speaker 1: do you know what I mean? So like people were like, oh,
Speaker 1: you're anxious, Oh you're this This is like, no, bitch,
Speaker 1: I'm prepared. I could see it all happen. Like what's
Speaker 1: that movie with Robert Downey?
Speaker 4: Okay, Robert j.
Speaker 2: Robert Downey Junior. Is that his name?
Speaker 1: Or like Theabaska Shiit, what's the name of that iron Man?
Speaker 2: Iron Man?
Speaker 1: You feel like iron Man because you already have like
Speaker 1: like a catastrophizer that's also a twin, mom. You already
Speaker 1: have like this little fucking screen in front of your face,
Speaker 1: and you're just like, I got this. This, These are
Speaker 1: all the things that can happen, and these are outcomes,
Speaker 1: and you're fucking prepared and so like I was fucking prepared.
Speaker 1: But like, emotionally, nothing will ever prepare you for someone
Speaker 1: that you love, that you are supposed to protect.
Speaker 2: And you can't.
Speaker 3: Oh, but but passing out of it all that must
Speaker 3: have been really rough because if he passes out, I mean,
Speaker 3: you don't know what's going on if somebody passes out.
Speaker 4: I know.
Speaker 1: That's That's why I try to keep him awake. That's
Speaker 1: why I took his shirt off. I put you know,
Speaker 1: a cold rag on the back of his neck, pulled
Speaker 1: his ears, put it on his forehead, his temples.
Speaker 2: Talk to him a lot. What's your name? Who am I?
Speaker 2: Where are you? Where are we going?
Speaker 3: Like you know, you just he just wanted to he
Speaker 3: wanted to sleep. Was he like I gotta sleep?
Speaker 1: Like yeah, he want Yeah, when you pass out. You
Speaker 1: just have to do what your body wants to do.
Speaker 1: But like I have done comedy shows where people have
Speaker 1: had seizures.
Speaker 2: We have done an adulting.
Speaker 1: Show where yeah absolutely yeah, Like shut it down, give
Speaker 1: them space, give them something cold, get them in the
Speaker 1: fresh air.
Speaker 2: I don't know what else to do besides that, Like
Speaker 2: we couldn't get blood pressure, we can't get a temp reading,
Speaker 2: Like you.
Speaker 5: Don't you just gotta was there a doctor on the flight?
Speaker 5: There was.
Speaker 1: She was very nice, doctor Megan. Shout out to you,
Speaker 1: thank you for coming. She was very sweet.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: There should be an air marshal and a doctor on
Speaker 3: every flight. Yeah, an accountant, a therapist.
Speaker 1: Yeah, a black hairdresser here, sure, since we hear, just
Speaker 1: brave me.
Speaker 2: The fuck up.
Speaker 3: By the way, black hair dresser shout out to them.
Speaker 3: I just did a show in Oswego, New York at
Speaker 3: Suni Oswego. There's a lot of black kids that go
Speaker 3: there from the city and they don't This is what
Speaker 3: happens to you know this. It's like black students go
Speaker 3: way out to Yonder to go to school and then
Speaker 3: they don't factor in their hair. So I feel like
Speaker 3: folks need to like airlift, black hairdressers, black barbers to
Speaker 3: these locations.
Speaker 2: Doctors without edges.
Speaker 3: Truly, truly, Oh my gosh, oh my gosh.
Speaker 5: What else?
Speaker 4: Man?
Speaker 2: I think that's about it. I think we've done enough
Speaker 2: share time.
Speaker 3: You know.
Speaker 1: The good thing about doing adulting is a getting it
Speaker 1: off your titties.
Speaker 2: It's just nice to get shot off.
Speaker 1: It's like feelings sometimes are really like a gas bubble.
Speaker 2: Get it out, you'll feel better.
Speaker 3: But all my chest. One quick thing about my chest
Speaker 3: before we move on. I got electrolysis on my chest
Speaker 3: for my birthday. My wife was like, she's like, I
Speaker 3: got you a gift and I was like really, She's like, yeah,
Speaker 3: laser hair removal on your chest. So my chest is
Speaker 3: now completely Picture it, Michelle.
Speaker 1: I'm trying to because I've been on vacation with you.
Speaker 1: But I like the taco meat.
Speaker 3: Yeah I did too, but it's gone. It's gone. It's
Speaker 3: gone forever forever. Well, I mean after six sessions.
Speaker 1: I will say one of my one of my best
Speaker 1: childhood memories growing up with my dad is his chest
Speaker 1: hair and like how proud he was and like you know,
Speaker 1: he even had an ascot on with like very low buttons.
Speaker 1: Like just out here and like even now, like you know,
Speaker 1: he's a beautiful, frail eighty three year old who still
Speaker 1: has so much pride in his new shirt and his
Speaker 1: gold chains, his crucifixes and stuff icy in Papa's and
Speaker 1: like he's got he's always had, like the taco meat
Speaker 1: and the and I was like, that is so muchis moo?
Speaker 1: I fucking love it? But yeah, man, whatever you want
Speaker 1: to do to feel good about you, I'm here to
Speaker 1: support the cause.
Speaker 5: Brother, Yeah, thank you. It hurts.
Speaker 1: Yeah, a lot of girls do it on the puss.
Speaker 1: Can you imagine they do well? Well, someone very much
Speaker 1: wiser than me said beauty is pain?
Speaker 4: Was that a h?
Speaker 3: It was the subject of this old documentary called Queen
Speaker 3: of Versailles.
Speaker 5: So yeah, she's wise than to me. Oh my god,
Speaker 5: give myself some credit.
Speaker 4: Anyway.
Speaker 5: Have you never seen Queen of Versailles?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 2: Yeah I have. It's satisfuck.
Speaker 1: What it is kind of everything wrong with America.
Speaker 4: I know, but I can't.
Speaker 3: I can't stop looking at I love Lauren Greenfield's documentaries.
Speaker 3: They're just like, yes, that is us. Yes, I love
Speaker 3: Patty Kaplan documentaries.
Speaker 1: You know she's done the real, real sex g string, Diva,
Speaker 1: taxticap confessions, like anything that will humanize people.
Speaker 2: That we always look down upon. I'm just like, give
Speaker 2: it to.
Speaker 1: Me, Patty, give it to med Patty. You know what,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna give it to y'all. L O L what
Speaker 1: am I mall cop with the segways? I love it
Speaker 1: so much. Write it down, never stop, put it on
Speaker 1: a magnet. It's my favorite. I was saying. I not
Speaker 1: only like the fact that we get to get our
Speaker 1: feelings out, but we can also do this nice check
Speaker 1: in with friends that we've known for a really long time,
Speaker 1: but like not in like a straight up, stand up way,
Speaker 1: but in a more sincere way. And so this is
Speaker 1: what I love about hanging out with our next guest.
Speaker 1: Why it's the nac I mean, we love him so
Speaker 1: much and we know you will too, if.
Speaker 2: You don't already.
Speaker 1: Okay, mm hmmm, let's just say it was a thick time.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, hi everyone, how the fuck are you?
Speaker 1: When I was fifteen, it was the first and last
Speaker 1: time I ever snuck out in the middle of the
Speaker 1: night to go dancing.
Speaker 2: Oh okay, I loved dancing.
Speaker 1: It was always time for the percolator and play and
Speaker 1: I worked at Wild Pair Cherry hillmell again she's lived
Speaker 1: a life. And I got a finger banged that Pens
Speaker 1: landing and Gota, thank you so much. Left my wallet
Speaker 1: there with my mom's credit card.
Speaker 2: She got a phone call. Anyways, Oh no, as he.
Speaker 1: Was fingering me on Penn's landing, my eyebrow, Pierson came out.
Speaker 2: Okay, anyways.
Speaker 1: Seventeen had a Camaro nineteen seventy seven Camaro. I look
Speaker 1: like Jenna Jackson and bon Jovi had a baby. It
Speaker 1: was a whole lass mess.
Speaker 5: And you are on an escapade right now, don't Yeah, jove, my.
Speaker 2: Friends, we're going to go to the limelight and we.
Speaker 5: Just whoa stand by.
Speaker 1: We dressed up in a shoelace. I don't fucking know
Speaker 1: what it was, but all like, we were a mess,
Speaker 1: but we were doing it. We had our Snapple bottles.
Speaker 1: We were ready to go. And I was such a
Speaker 1: mess driving in the city. I never drove in the
Speaker 1: city before in a Camaro is like all front, it's
Speaker 1: all hood, no back. Sure, So these turns were wet
Speaker 1: and wild, and a couple of times I was driving
Speaker 1: down the street like the wrong way.
Speaker 2: What yeah, because I didn't know.
Speaker 3: I was like, that's a New York City driving lesson
Speaker 3: right there. I missed my turn.
Speaker 4: I'm my backup.
Speaker 1: But I will say we got in. I don't know
Speaker 1: how we got in. We were seventeen and I had
Speaker 1: the time of my life. It was the first time
Speaker 1: I ever saw drag queens voguing club kids platforms, and
Speaker 1: I was like, this is how I want to retire.
Speaker 1: Like I hadn't even graduated high school, and I was
Speaker 1: just like, can I just go to.
Speaker 2: The club all the time. I wasn't even doing drugs
Speaker 2: of drinking.
Speaker 1: Just loved the excitement of dancing with people I didn't know.
Speaker 3: I was the same way I interned at Fat Farm
Speaker 3: when I was like right out of high school.
Speaker 4: That's right.
Speaker 3: People I interned, They're like, I am Pasha, But I did.
Speaker 3: And I obviously worked in accounting now. But it got
Speaker 3: you on trade to all these different clubs. Uh oh wow, Yeah,
Speaker 3: it was like it was insane. Did you go to
Speaker 3: Justin's before you went?
Speaker 4: I went to nell Now I went to Nell's.
Speaker 2: Did you get the wings that Justin's?
Speaker 4: I never went to Justine. I never got to go
Speaker 4: to Justice.
Speaker 3: Okay, Nells was popping in the West. Villain Nels was
Speaker 3: popping in the West. I got in no cover charge,
Speaker 3: you didn't have to buy any drinks. It was just because,
Speaker 3: like I worked at fat farms. So they're like, all right,
Speaker 3: that's that kid, can go. I love that for you,
Speaker 3: Thank you. What kind of guy are you in the club?
Speaker 3: Are you just like sitting back watching everybody? Are you
Speaker 3: like creeping up on.
Speaker 5: I'm reading a book, literally reading a book.
Speaker 2: What kind of guy were you at the club? DJ?
Speaker 4: Don Will, I'm I'm in, I'm on the wall.
Speaker 3: I don't really dance, Okay, I'm boring in the club
Speaker 3: unless I'm really drunk and I'm fun unless you're really
Speaker 3: like how many drinks does to take for us to
Speaker 3: meet fun?
Speaker 4: Done? Well?
Speaker 3: My club days were like the Incredible Hawk days, like
Speaker 3: the the Hennessy and Aliade. Yes, Alisa, Yes, it's a
Speaker 3: different it was a different me. It was a different time.
Speaker 1: We had fucking Alosa, We had an engineered fucking food.
Speaker 1: You guys have like crafted cocktails. Back in my day,
Speaker 1: I had to drink some blue shit. Didn't even know
Speaker 1: what the fuck it was.
Speaker 3: Gold Schlager, Goldschlager, Alie said, jaegermeister jagger hoodsard Yeah, Jaeger bombs.
Speaker 5: Jaeger bombs.
Speaker 2: What are Yeager balls?
Speaker 4: Bombs?
Speaker 2: Bombs?
Speaker 1: I was like, I don't want jagger balls. That sounds salty. No,
Speaker 1: I don't want the msg.
Speaker 4: Or do I?
Speaker 2: I'm always conflicted. Listen. I used to drink a smooth
Speaker 2: criminal back in the day.
Speaker 4: Do you know what the fuck that ye?
Speaker 1: Can you imagine this face ordering a smooth criminal? It
Speaker 1: is Hennessy and Bailey's Oo. I'd like, I don't know
Speaker 1: why I have so many cavities.
Speaker 2: It's disgusting.
Speaker 1: No, everybody had a gross drink when they were like
Speaker 1: fucking nineteen twenty.
Speaker 4: I bucked out a lot, and.
Speaker 1: I was like, why am I blocking out Hennessy and
Speaker 1: Bailey's Damn. We don't have to talk about it. Very
Speaker 1: excited to bring our next guest. Yes, one of our favorites.
Speaker 4: Start clapping, start clapping.
Speaker 5: You know him from the Daily Show and so many
Speaker 5: other things.
Speaker 1: Former stand up comedian, host, producer, Please give it up for.
Speaker 5: A problems as well.
Speaker 4: Why Sinnac.
Speaker 5: Where is he there?
Speaker 6: Oh?
Speaker 4: My god, God, who does that?
Speaker 5: I'll tell you who does it?
Speaker 4: Whyatt Sannak?
Speaker 6: You all were talking about drinks and I saw this
Speaker 6: backstage and I was like, this sounds like a drink
Speaker 6: you would find at a black nightclub. Uh, it's thick miss,
Speaker 6: black label. Like they've made a point to even call
Speaker 6: it black label.
Speaker 4: Thick miss.
Speaker 1: I mean miss is spelled with a y, so you
Speaker 1: know it's real, So you know it's black. I'm I
Speaker 1: was ever a stripper and also into weather.
Speaker 4: Ladies and gentlemen.
Speaker 6: Makes some noise coming to the stage right now, black
Speaker 6: label thick miss.
Speaker 4: Here she is black label thick miss.
Speaker 2: Yup, it's time for the percolator. Everyone.
Speaker 6: Chelei dances to one song for fifteen minutes straight on loop.
Speaker 4: Here she is black label, take mess. You know what?
Speaker 2: You should be a DJ at a strip club?
Speaker 4: That was the dream?
Speaker 6: Was it?
Speaker 4: This was the fallback? Yeah? Boy, I failed.
Speaker 2: Have you been to a strip club before?
Speaker 4: I have? Oh you wanted a story?
Speaker 6: Yes? At more just checking in just to tick the
Speaker 6: box and yeah, yeah, I've been to Uh, I've been
Speaker 6: to a lot of strip clubs.
Speaker 2: Oh, in New York, Atlanta, LA, where Miami.
Speaker 6: I think the first trip club I went to was
Speaker 6: in Atlanta. My cousin took me sure and it was
Speaker 6: part of a college visit.
Speaker 2: Hold on again credits.
Speaker 6: It was it was part of a college visit. And
Speaker 6: my child who grew up watching a different World. So
Speaker 6: I was like, I want to go to an HBCU.
Speaker 6: I knew about Morehouse. I was like, I want to
Speaker 6: go to Morehouse. My mother was like, I don't want
Speaker 6: you to go to Morehouse. And my cousin had gone
Speaker 6: to Morehouse, and so we were in Atlanta, and my
Speaker 6: mother told my cousin to scare me out of going
Speaker 6: to Morehouse, and so he took me on a tour
Speaker 6: of Morehouse and then also the city of Atlanta, and
Speaker 6: so he took me to the campus, told me that
Speaker 6: and this is a horrible thing, but as like a
Speaker 6: seventeen year old, I like, it was just like one
Speaker 6: of those weird things. Told me that there's a horrible
Speaker 6: male rape problem at Morehouse. Yeah, my mother told my
Speaker 6: cousin do whatever it takes for this child to not
Speaker 6: go to a black college. That's the most anti black
Speaker 6: shit ever. And my cousin was like, oh, yeah, niggas
Speaker 6: be raping niggas here. And I was like oh. And
Speaker 6: then my cousin's like, but you're in Atlanta. Let's take
Speaker 6: you to one of Atlanta's finest strip clubs. And then
Speaker 6: he took me to this strip club that's like a
Speaker 6: dive bar that I feel like somebody probably knows of
Speaker 6: because now it's like a is the Clairemont Lounge.
Speaker 3: Yeah, woa, yeah, wow, okay, yeah, ready to go bam
Speaker 3: the Claremont know it.
Speaker 6: Yeah, that was the first time I went to a
Speaker 6: strip club and it was a terrifying experience. And uh
Speaker 6: and but yeah, that was It was a terrifying experience.
Speaker 6: But it was also one where I was like, I'll
Speaker 6: try again.
Speaker 3: It can only get better. You never not even Magic City.
Speaker 3: You didn't take you to Magic City. No, because this
Speaker 3: whole thing was to scare me away from Atlanta by
Speaker 3: all means necessary.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I went to school in North Carolina. That's still crazy.
Speaker 3: It's like, in one breath, your your cousin or uncle
Speaker 3: was just like my cousin, cousin.
Speaker 4: I mean, it's a black family, so he could be
Speaker 4: my uncle.
Speaker 6: I have a lot of I have a lot of
Speaker 6: cousins who are actually my uncle, and I'm somebody's uncle
Speaker 6: when I call him cousin.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but he's just He's just like, this is where
Speaker 3: you know one dude violated another, and this is where
Speaker 3: doctor King slept.
Speaker 1: Uh, how did you find out?
Speaker 6: That was kind of ship she was known for? And
Speaker 6: then I think at some point he capped to it
Speaker 6: like that was ship she.
Speaker 2: Was known for.
Speaker 3: Why didn't she Why did she not want you to
Speaker 3: go to Morehouse? And and you said anti black racism?
Speaker 5: Is that?
Speaker 3: Is that?
Speaker 5: Like you know, just just just asking why?
Speaker 6: Like why, I mean, we both grew up in Dallas,
Speaker 6: we grew up, we knew each other as children.
Speaker 4: It's true.
Speaker 5: This is where we reveals.
Speaker 6: I think in her mind she thought that by going
Speaker 6: to a black college, I would not be able to
Speaker 6: be accepted in white society, Like I wouldn't get hired
Speaker 6: for a job at a law firm if they saw
Speaker 6: like more House or Howard or something like that. Yeah,
Speaker 6: And that she didn't put enough faith on my own
Speaker 6: abilities as a human being, and that it doesn't really
Speaker 6: matter what school you go to. It just matters your
Speaker 6: work ethic and your ability. But also that oh sure,
Speaker 6: thank you, uh three three professors from southern or here.
Speaker 2: That's so wild.
Speaker 1: I mean, can our parents just be the last generation
Speaker 1: to do that shit.
Speaker 4: I mean, people still are gonna do it. They're gonna
Speaker 4: find a way.
Speaker 1: Oh my goodness. What was the journey coming to New
Speaker 1: York then? Because I've only just known you in New York, right, yeah,
Speaker 1: and you feel like a New Yorker.
Speaker 4: So I was born here. That was the doctor who
Speaker 4: delivered me for real?
Speaker 6: Yeah, you know, I rolled deep, I bring, I bring
Speaker 6: the doctor who delivered me. It was a c section.
Speaker 6: We know each other well. No, I was born. I
Speaker 6: was born here. My grandmother had moved from North Carolina
Speaker 6: to New York, you know, great migration and whatnot. Came
Speaker 6: to New York, lived in Crown Heights, all right. Yeah,
Speaker 6: it was very different when she lived here. But I
Speaker 6: was born. My mother lived here. I was then born here.
Speaker 6: My mother and my father split up when I was
Speaker 6: about a year old. My father was New York City
Speaker 6: cab driver. She remarried. My mother, my stepfather, and I
Speaker 6: moved to Texas. But I would come back out here, yeah,
Speaker 6: and spend time with my father when he was around,
Speaker 6: and then with my grandmother.
Speaker 2: Okay, so New York is a part of your history.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I mean that was like every summer I would
Speaker 6: come here and it was that thing of like I
Speaker 6: hated going back to Dallas.
Speaker 4: No offense.
Speaker 3: I hate going back to Dallas too. Now you all
Speaker 3: don't understand, You're like, oh, it don't shit, hole it is.
Speaker 3: It's the worst. We killed one charismatic president and we
Speaker 3: can't live it down, all right.
Speaker 1: I have so many questions about Texas, especially Dallas, and
Speaker 1: especially for anyone who is black or queer or questioning
Speaker 1: or whatever the fuck living in Texas perhaps listening to
Speaker 1: this podcast, like we what are we telling them? Because
Speaker 1: it could it could be twelve, it could be forty two,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, Like it could be someone
Speaker 1: just stuck in a rut there not knowing how to
Speaker 1: get out, not knowing that the world can be a
Speaker 1: better place for them, that they could feel seen and
Speaker 1: they don't have to like live this fucking lie. What
Speaker 1: are we fucking telling these people, especially in Texas. Now
Speaker 1: I feel like, no offense.
Speaker 4: I don't want to go to Texas.
Speaker 5: Yeah, no you don't. You don't have to.
Speaker 3: It's the state is narrow minded and getting more narrow minded.
Speaker 3: But the cities that we grew up in actually are
Speaker 3: like haven cities, right, So Houston's a big haven city.
Speaker 3: Austin's a big haven city, and then Dallas is like
Speaker 3: a haven city because there's a huge quick community in Dallas.
Speaker 3: Oakland shout out to Oakland, which is an amazing place,
Speaker 3: and it's one of the biggest in Texas.
Speaker 5: So it's biggest in Texas.
Speaker 3: It's just big. But I felt that I had to
Speaker 3: leave the state. I think you felt the same way too,
Speaker 3: because there was no give and take.
Speaker 6: It was like, well, I mean, for me, I never
Speaker 6: really felt connected because I always felt like I was
Speaker 6: from New York and I was brought to Texas. I
Speaker 6: didn't have agency like I was four, So like I
Speaker 6: had said at four, I was like, I musta stay here,
Speaker 6: and they were like, that's not how that happens legally.
Speaker 6: I was like, let me get my own lawyer. It's
Speaker 6: a squirrel.
Speaker 4: It's a squirrel.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 3: But you talk about in your special Brooklyn, it's like
Speaker 3: Brooklyn is home, you know, and it feels like like
Speaker 3: you you are mad Brooklyn at you could be the
Speaker 3: mayor of Brooklyn.
Speaker 4: Thank you.
Speaker 6: I mean that's a very low bar. The current mayor
Speaker 6: of New York is not great. But no, But to
Speaker 6: something that you all were saying, like what do you
Speaker 6: say to somebody who's in a place like Texas who
Speaker 6: is a person of color, who's queer. I understand the
Speaker 6: desire to leave, but then there's also a part of
Speaker 6: it that's like there's a privilege in being able to leave,
Speaker 6: and I feel like for the people who don't have
Speaker 6: that privilege, I would say, find your people and find
Speaker 6: strength in your people, and don't let fucking closed mindedness
Speaker 6: win out, because yeah, Texas is getting more hate filled
Speaker 6: and more closed minded. And what you see is you
Speaker 6: see a lot of people like there was a story,
Speaker 6: I want to say a year ago where it was
Speaker 6: like all these like left leaning people from California had
Speaker 6: moved to Austin and they were like, ah, Austin, that's great,
Speaker 6: and then all of a sudden, shit gets hard and
Speaker 6: they're like, we're out. And that's a great privilege to
Speaker 6: be able to do that. But not everybody has that privilege.
Speaker 6: And it feels like you only win these things with numbers,
Speaker 6: and it's about organizing those strength and numbers to be like,
Speaker 6: fuck this, we're not going anywhere. You have to live
Speaker 6: with us just the same way we have to live
Speaker 6: with you, and you have to actually learn to accept
Speaker 6: and respect us. And also we need to get the
Speaker 6: keys of power because you all are sucking it up.
Speaker 4: That's the thick miss talking.
Speaker 5: Okay, we're about the same age.
Speaker 6: That's very sweet of you to say we're about the
Speaker 6: same age. When truth be told, I'm I'm older. Okay, sorry,
Speaker 6: I'm your uncle, I'm your uncle, cousin, I'm your uncle.
Speaker 6: I was just curious, are you like something else? Truly,
Speaker 6: I don't know. I don't know this or not.
Speaker 4: I don't know this. Are you? Are you?
Speaker 3: You're You're not married. You're not married, no ever been married.
Speaker 3: You're about to I'm about to fucking get down on
Speaker 3: two knees.
Speaker 2: And oh that sounds like something else.
Speaker 3: Too, Yeah, yeah, Dallas style.
Speaker 4: Are we doing?
Speaker 3: No, I'm just I'm just wondering what it's like to
Speaker 3: date in twenty twenty three in Brooklyn at this point, Oh, okay,
Speaker 3: we these people.
Speaker 4: Are on the fence about dating.
Speaker 1: I don't I feel like dating is always going to
Speaker 1: be hard, but especially now because you just have access
Speaker 1: to everything and everyone, so you can find out way
Speaker 1: too many things about the person, you know what I mean? Like,
Speaker 1: I think a challenge for yourself is not to go
Speaker 1: down that rabbit hole of their page and just ask
Speaker 1: them questions and just figure out chemistry and then find
Speaker 1: out they've been arrested, you know, like.
Speaker 4: Like you know what I mean? I mean to me.
Speaker 6: The one thing that I've always found weird, at least
Speaker 6: since I've been in New York is when I came
Speaker 6: to New York in two thousand and eight, I came
Speaker 6: because I'd gotten on The Daily Show, and.
Speaker 4: So it's fine time. It was a job time.
Speaker 6: I feel like there's the strange thing of like when
Speaker 6: I started dating in New York. I remember going on
Speaker 6: dates where people would be like, what's John Stewart like?
Speaker 6: And I was like, oh, wait a minute, did you
Speaker 6: just did you just want free tickets?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 6: And so there and so I think for me there
Speaker 6: was always an element of like, okay, like are you
Speaker 6: here to meet me? Are you here for free tickets?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 6: For my boss's show and so uh, And more often
Speaker 6: than not it was the free tickets.
Speaker 1: Oh shit, fine, just go to like oneiyota dot com.
Speaker 4: What is Oneiota dot com?
Speaker 2: It's the ticket thing where you get the tickets.
Speaker 4: Oh right. I thought it was like some pure blood
Speaker 4: dating site. One iota.
Speaker 6: I don't want one, but I'm open to anything else.
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 4: I'm sure site exists.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I will say, like, if it's not your job.
Speaker 1: Sometimes people just yeah, sometimes people are just dating you
Speaker 1: for another reason other than you.
Speaker 4: Right, yeah, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: I had a couple of friends and I don't talk
Speaker 1: to no more because everything was a show. Like they
Speaker 1: had to have like a rich girl or a rich guy,
Speaker 1: or a hot this or hot that, and look at
Speaker 1: what they do and what they drive and shit, and
Speaker 1: I'm like, I could give a fuck. They can't even
Speaker 1: like put two sentences together that are interesting. Why would
Speaker 1: you ever want to sit on that?
Speaker 4: You know what I mean?
Speaker 1: So like, I think sometimes a lot. I'm sorry, are
Speaker 1: you put in your face in someone's crotch? That's not funny?
Speaker 1: Don't do that?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 2: No, no, don't you deserve so much more.
Speaker 6: Your face deserves to be sat on by the best
Speaker 6: each of you. Your life deserves to be no one
Speaker 6: by the best the mayor of booklets.
Speaker 5: Yes, church beautiful.
Speaker 2: All right, Okay, now it's time for questions for the audience.
Speaker 2: Where is my.
Speaker 5: Tambourine when you need it?
Speaker 4: Okay?
Speaker 3: First question, how long is too long to be in
Speaker 3: a situationship dot dot dot when you're thirty two, that's
Speaker 3: what it says.
Speaker 4: When you're thirty two.
Speaker 1: I'd say a whole season, so three months, a semester,
Speaker 1: a semester. But also like some people like fucking drama
Speaker 1: and messiness, so if you want to waste your good
Speaker 1: years during that.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 6: Also, though, isn't like the age of thirty two kind
Speaker 6: of a situationship with yourself? I feel like there are
Speaker 6: a lot of people who if you're older than thirty two,
Speaker 6: if you are thirty eight and older and you were
Speaker 6: asked to reflect on thirty two, you'd be like, oh, yeah,
Speaker 6: I don't know her.
Speaker 3: This is a cute one for Michelle. Do the twins
Speaker 3: have a favorite Sesame Street? Muppet love? A producer from
Speaker 3: the street?
Speaker 2: What what show yourself? I need tickets?
Speaker 4: I also have a favorite muppet. I'll come out and
Speaker 4: take what it gets to ticket.
Speaker 1: My daughter loves Abby and my son loves the Cookie
Speaker 1: Monster because he loves cookies. Also, Sesame Street is amazing
Speaker 1: when you found the right dosage of edible because you're.
Speaker 2: Like, ooh so great.
Speaker 6: Everyone should go on YouTube. There's an old sesame street clip.
Speaker 6: That's just a great song about the subway and like
Speaker 6: it's wonderful because it's like both how like amazing and terrible?
Speaker 6: The subway is the same, all right? How do I
Speaker 6: get over a guy who doesn't give a shit about me? Whoa?
Speaker 3: Oh wow? That was sadder than a French new wave film.
Speaker 3: It's just how did I get to for a man
Speaker 3: who cares? Not?
Speaker 4: But I don't get it?
Speaker 1: Because why are you giving this person power? What don't
Speaker 1: you like about yourself? What happened? Did something happen to
Speaker 1: you when you started to believe that shit? This man
Speaker 1: doesn't deserve your fucking time or energy. Put that energy
Speaker 1: into you, put it you make a vision for high
Speaker 1: if you got to have some wine and hennessy, bitch,
Speaker 1: just live.
Speaker 3: You deserves some one good on your face? Always Ye
Speaker 3: done it better when he said it?
Speaker 2: And it does.
Speaker 4: I mean Michelle was the one who said it. You
Speaker 4: took it and yeah he made like the church.
Speaker 6: Every behind, every pastor, there's the woman who's actually doing
Speaker 6: all the work.
Speaker 1: Absolutely, yes, it's it's the origin of man's plaining.
Speaker 4: It's a wild one.
Speaker 3: How do you keep having quote unquote sexy sex when
Speaker 3: you're trying for.
Speaker 6: Baby, Pretend like you're not trying for a baby.
Speaker 2: What's that sexy sex?
Speaker 5: Sexy sex when you're trying for baby.
Speaker 2: I don't know what's going on.
Speaker 1: Like if you can't drink and if you can't get high, then,
Speaker 1: like I said before, hotel sex is wonderful.
Speaker 2: You don't have to clean anything up, get.
Speaker 1: Yourself a nice tub, order some overpriced fucking eggs, like
Speaker 1: you know, make it a staycation, make it a moment.
Speaker 2: Yes, oh we got three? Oh thank you for women.
Speaker 4: That's some on.
Speaker 6: Yeah, no, I don't here, take this one. Take this
Speaker 6: one that's poking out there. I will how my husband
Speaker 6: got me? Oh my, oh my god, oh my god,
Speaker 6: this is for you.
Speaker 4: Got you, dear Jordan.
Speaker 3: If I were your big sister and I am older
Speaker 3: than you, irl, happy face, how would you? I couldn't
Speaker 3: help me prioritize my bays when they are each in
Speaker 3: their twenties, thirties and photies. Xoxo, little siss Jay. Good question,
Speaker 3: great question.
Speaker 2: Oh my god? What in the black, missie?
Speaker 4: I don't know.
Speaker 3: I think you have a sophie's choice here, and I
Speaker 3: feel like keep the twenty year old, ditch the rest
Speaker 3: m you can just pour all of your knowledge into them.
Speaker 3: You know, they're like a little vessel. Right, I'm thinking
Speaker 3: she stays with the twenty year old V six in line.
Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying, like, goes up, we've got
Speaker 3: car people, Okay.
Speaker 5: The rest of you are like, what's an engine?
Speaker 4: All right?
Speaker 1: So uh but I say, like, why you even like
Speaker 1: to choose? Why not just have a fucking buffet? And
Speaker 1: so you don't want to any more? That's all I
Speaker 1: remember when I was saying these two guys. One was
Speaker 1: really really not I was not physically attracted to him.
Speaker 2: He was so.
Speaker 1: Short but so sweet, and the way he looked up
Speaker 1: at me, I just couldn't, you know. And then I
Speaker 1: was staying this really hot guy from I think Bermuda,
Speaker 1: the Bahamas.
Speaker 2: Something would have beat. And I remember thinking, if I
Speaker 2: could just.
Speaker 7: No and I remember from Boston, king Stun Kingston, Okay.
Speaker 5: I truly cannot.
Speaker 1: Anyways, I remember thinking if I could just combine these
Speaker 1: two people to make the perfect person. And that happens
Speaker 1: when you're dating a lot. You're just like, well like
Speaker 1: this part and that part, but you can't frank and
Speaker 1: sign people.
Speaker 2: You know what I mean, but you could just.
Speaker 5: Ride it out, you know, truly, I love it? What's
Speaker 5: the next ones?
Speaker 2: Should I get a dog to start getting up early?
Speaker 5: What?
Speaker 1: Should I get a dog to start getting up early?
Speaker 2: You set your alarm?
Speaker 4: Bitch? Who has this good? Why put that pressure on
Speaker 4: the dog? I know?
Speaker 2: What if the dog want to sleep in?
Speaker 5: Yeah, some dogs like to sleep as long as their person.
Speaker 6: But that's also like the logic of like, should I
Speaker 6: have a kid to learn how to make pancakes? I
Speaker 6: don't know how to make pancakes, and I don't have
Speaker 6: a reason to learn. But if I had a child,
Speaker 6: then I would need to learn how to make pancakes.
Speaker 4: So it makes sense.
Speaker 6: Sure, there's eighteen years of financial responsibility, but there's also
Speaker 6: the ability to know how to make pancakes.
Speaker 1: And I really feel like a little Greek yogurt. A
Speaker 1: pancake mix goes a long way.
Speaker 4: Oh for sure.
Speaker 6: It's so fluffy, and I wouldn't have known that if
Speaker 6: a little.
Speaker 2: Am I too old to like puppets? Is this from
Speaker 2: the Decame Street producer?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 5: They've had it at Samet.
Speaker 2: Are you too old?
Speaker 7: You know?
Speaker 1: You should like what you like? I'm sure there's like
Speaker 1: a meetup group. You know, just don't surprise people at
Speaker 1: a dinner party. I hate when people show up with
Speaker 1: their guitar.
Speaker 2: I'm like, what the fuck is.
Speaker 4: This all right?
Speaker 5: I got no open We.
Speaker 1: Were auditioning for America Scott Talent. Put that ship away.
Speaker 6: Here's a question for you. You're at a party. Someone could
Speaker 6: show up with a guitar or with a puppet.
Speaker 4: Which do you shoot? Wow, so many people guitar. You're
Speaker 4: going guitar?
Speaker 2: Yeah, because at least I can, like hum to a
Speaker 2: song I want.
Speaker 4: I want to puppet.
Speaker 3: I want the ones that like show up at protests,
Speaker 3: you know what I mean, on stilts and everything, like.
Speaker 4: A bread and puppet situation.
Speaker 3: What's the question, Okay, how much is childcare worth to you?
Speaker 3: Question mark for example, money for forty six hours of
Speaker 3: child of fob? What's money for forty six hours of
Speaker 3: child free?
Speaker 5: Like child free for six hours? How much it works?
Speaker 3: That's what it says. How much is it worth? How
Speaker 3: much is it worth to you? This is sort of
Speaker 3: like getting an old fashion at a bar. You get
Speaker 3: what you pay for, Like you want.
Speaker 1: Someone that's gonna go through your fucking freezer and eat
Speaker 1: all your hot pockets, ignore your child.
Speaker 4: I got the next one, all right.
Speaker 6: It says I've been estrange from my sister for four years.
Speaker 6: How do I get over myself my anger, et cetera,
Speaker 6: to reconcile or do I smiley face?
Speaker 3: I don't want to get over there. They're like, I
Speaker 3: love my anger. That's a tough one.
Speaker 2: That's a tough one.
Speaker 4: That's a tough one.
Speaker 2: I say, leave for a little bit. I don't know.
Speaker 2: I'm the only child, so I really don't know who
Speaker 2: wrote this.
Speaker 3: Siblings are tough. But you know what, blood is thicker
Speaker 3: than mud. That's what you have to do. So at
Speaker 3: the end of the day, you are stuck with this person.
Speaker 3: You can be as strange for as long as you want.
Speaker 3: My dad was a strange from his brother for twenty
Speaker 3: years and life brought them back together and they've been
Speaker 3: making up for lost time. So eventually you will probably
Speaker 3: dovetail back with this person. I don't I don't want
Speaker 3: to rush it for you, but know that the day
Speaker 3: is coming.
Speaker 6: Fun but also if it doesn't come, but also if
Speaker 6: it doesn't come, it doesn't come. I mean, I think
Speaker 6: at the end of the day, you have to do
Speaker 6: and make the decisions that are the healthiest and best
Speaker 6: for you. Uah, and so I think that's the thing.
Speaker 6: And sometimes, as shitty as it is to be a
Speaker 6: strange from people and as aimful as that is, if
Speaker 6: that is ultimately what you both need to move forward
Speaker 6: in a healthy way, then that's what you have to do.
Speaker 6: And it fucking hurts like hell, but it's the choice
Speaker 6: that you have to make to do something because you
Speaker 6: know that the alternative is something that is never going
Speaker 6: to get better, and getting better is something that you
Speaker 6: both have to work on. So you may in your
Speaker 6: questions say like, how do I put my anger aside?
Speaker 6: Get past your anger and just recognize what you need
Speaker 6: to do for yourself to be the best, healthiest version
Speaker 6: of yourself. If that person is doing that, then you
Speaker 6: two will find each other again. If they are not,
Speaker 6: then just live your healthy life.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm tired of being disappointed.
Speaker 3: Don Why Yeah, I was gonna say, it depends on
Speaker 3: the state of the sibling, you know what I'm saying, Like,
Speaker 3: you can be ready to get over your shit, but
Speaker 3: if that person's not in that space, echo and White said,
Speaker 3: it doesn't make any sense to try.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I have cousins that are Trump supporters, and
Speaker 1: I'm like, bye, bye bye, have a good one and bye.
Speaker 5: This is a great question.
Speaker 2: This is the last question.
Speaker 4: Last question.
Speaker 3: Is it important to still be selective when dating in
Speaker 3: your forties?
Speaker 5: Did you write this question?
Speaker 4: You know? I wish I did?
Speaker 2: Did you know selective?
Speaker 1: I feel like it's subjective, right, Like what you're looking for,
Speaker 1: what you're going to move for. You want a relationship
Speaker 1: that's a different list than like some like having fun,
Speaker 1: doing a little something casual.
Speaker 4: So sure, I don't know.
Speaker 1: So why we ask all our guests, what's the most
Speaker 1: adult thing you want to do for yourself this year
Speaker 1: that you haven't done yet.
Speaker 6: I haven't really done a lot of traveling out of
Speaker 6: the country, and I've always wanted to go to Japan
Speaker 6: and so uh yeah, so uh maybe Japan taking a
Speaker 6: trip to Japan. Uh and yeah, and then maybe also
Speaker 6: replace my roof. Oh yeah, that's that's a very adult
Speaker 6: thing that I don't really want to do, but I.
Speaker 2: Feel like it's like a got to do it.
Speaker 6: Yeah yeah, because at some point, Yeah, the squirrels are
Speaker 6: going to come in and they're gonna be.
Speaker 4: Like, remember us, we were a legal team bringing it back, everybody,
Speaker 4: give it up.
Speaker 1: You know what I really wish why it would have said,
Speaker 1: is write a book, because I feel like their brothers
Speaker 1: got stories, and he's really only just begun, and so
Speaker 1: it's very exciting to see friends like that who are just,
Speaker 1: I don't know, full of wonder and possibility. So I'm
Speaker 1: excited for him. Maybe y'all go to Japan and write
Speaker 1: a book. I don't know.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, I wish he had said that too,
Speaker 3: because he does. I just feel like there's like so
Speaker 3: many layers to him. There's so many layers onion. He's
Speaker 3: a whole ass onion.
Speaker 4: He's just so.
Speaker 5: I mean, any man that shows up in a jumpsuit like.
Speaker 2: That, yeah, yum.
Speaker 5: Y'all didn't know, but he was in it.
Speaker 4: He was in a.
Speaker 5: Can we let up the scene? The scene?
Speaker 6: Do it?
Speaker 4: Color?
Speaker 5: Plum, right, that's what he was. He was wearing plum
Speaker 5: and like a knit hat that was like too cool
Speaker 5: for Sunday School.
Speaker 2: It was too much. It was too much.
Speaker 5: And he had a friend. Yeah, beautiful probly did creative ship.
Speaker 4: Yeah it was cool.
Speaker 1: Beautiful black man look like they're on their skincare routine.
Speaker 1: I'm talking about Beard glistening beard oil poppin'. You know
Speaker 1: it's from like somewhere on Bedtuy on Lewis Avenue, from
Speaker 1: an all black hands shop. Just coconut cocon nodding and
Speaker 1: ship so like beautiful.
Speaker 2: I wish y'all could smell them through the podcast. You cannot,
Speaker 2: We will do it for you.
Speaker 5: It smells like Throop Street on a good day.
Speaker 2: Ye true, true, through, It's true, honey.
Speaker 5: Okay, they say through.
Speaker 2: They say through, but it is really true. Florid of mer.
Speaker 5: Put what it is in the comments. Thank you so much.
Speaker 2: All right, right, keep it sharp like your pinky nail.
Speaker 2: Let's go. Oh god, you guys, I gotta go listen
Speaker 2: too much.
Speaker 5: This has been an exactly right production.
Speaker 2: Our senior producer is g Holley.
Speaker 5: Our associate producer is Alex Cheat.
Speaker 2: This episode was mixed by John Bradley.
Speaker 5: Our guest booker is Patrick Cottner.
Speaker 2: Additional production support from Hannah Kyle Crichton.
Speaker 5: Theme song and live show DJing is by DJ Don Will.
Speaker 2: Our live show producer is Marion Ways.
Speaker 5: Artwork by Jamie back.
Speaker 2: Tell, Photography by Chais vander Moss.
Speaker 3: Executive produced by Karen kilgera Georgia Hardstark and Daniel Craik.
Speaker 2: Follow the show on Instagram at Adulting the Pod.
Speaker 3: Email your questions to Adulting Questions at gmail dot com.
Speaker 6: MMMM