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Speaker 1: I crushed my husband's dreams. What do I do? So

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Speaker 1: comfortable egg thirty nine twenty one says my twenty nine

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Speaker 1: female husband twenty eight male decided to try out stand

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Speaker 1: up come and he had an open mic nights. Go

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Speaker 1: Riley really wants to do stand up comedy?

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Speaker 2: I think I I think I do Okay.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, you just need to get up there.

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Speaker 2: Get up, thank you.

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Speaker 1: You just need to get on up there. I was

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Speaker 1: so excited because he's hilarious, supportive. I asked him if

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Speaker 1: he wanted to practice with me, but he said no,

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Speaker 1: he wanted it to be a surprise all. So I

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Speaker 1: finally got to watch him perform the other night. His

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Speaker 1: delivery was great. He's got good stage presence and just

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Speaker 1: getting up there. It all takes a lot of courage.

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Speaker 1: But his material it was one extended wiener joke.

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Speaker 2: Ah. Sometimes sometimes I could wiener joke could.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but all all of it, that's just it gets old.

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Speaker 2: I've seen like comedians go on for for like an

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Speaker 2: hour just talking about wiener jokes.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but are they funny? But some members of the

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Speaker 1: audience loved it. They were in the minority. Most of

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Speaker 1: the audience looked uncomfortable and slightly appalled. After his performance,

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Speaker 1: as we were walking home, he asked me did you

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Speaker 1: like it? And I said I didn't like his material

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Speaker 1: because it was basically one big wiener joke. I then

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Speaker 1: said that he had great stage presence, and I think

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Speaker 1: this could be the start of something awesome if he

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Speaker 1: worked on his material.

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Speaker 2: Okay, that is constructive criticism right now. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel like maybe, like maybe the problem is

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Speaker 1: going to arise in how she delivered the information. But

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Speaker 1: I don't know if she gave both, maybe she.

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Speaker 2: Could have been like, well she give like it's like

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Speaker 2: a soundich, you're great on stage. Maybe I should have

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Speaker 2: started with that and then blah blah blah blah blah.

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Speaker 1: I wish she should have been like, yeah, yeah, you

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Speaker 1: did so well. Your material was really bad, but like

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Speaker 1: you made me.

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Speaker 2: Laugh, Yeah exactly.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. Maybe yeah, Maybe it's just the delivery, that's all

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Speaker 1: she Maybe she needed to work on her delivery.

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Speaker 2: I wish we had a voice memo of how she liked.

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Speaker 1: Yeah said it, yeah, because I think it does change.

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Speaker 1: If she was like harsh, then I'd be like, but

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Speaker 1: if she was just like, your material couldn't use some

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Speaker 1: work I think it didn't really appeal to the audience.

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Speaker 2: It depends that makes sense.

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Speaker 1: Yah yeah. Wait so if you went up there and

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Speaker 1: you was like your material wash but your stage.

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Speaker 2: Present was great, that's actually a compliment. I'd be like, okay, cool.

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Speaker 1: Okay, all right. Uh. He got upset and said that

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Speaker 1: I was a buzzkill. He said that everyone was laughing

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Speaker 1: besides me, and I pointed out that they weren't even

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Speaker 1: the majority of the crowd. Oh, that they weren't not

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Speaker 1: even the majority of the crowd was Oh, she's really

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Speaker 1: really digging into him. She's like, actually, no one was laughing.

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Speaker 1: He's really upset with me. He says he was really

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Speaker 1: nervous about doing it and was just proud of having

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Speaker 1: done it, but I made him feel ashamed. He's unhappy

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Speaker 1: now and says there's nothing I can do to fix it. Okay, Well,

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Speaker 1: perhaps like slightly dramatic, but I do think that she

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Speaker 1: could start with a little bit more support because it's

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Speaker 1: his first time.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I want to I want to keep reading because

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Speaker 2: I have some thoughts, but I'm not sure if things

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Speaker 2: will happen. Yeah you know what I mean. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 2: I'm just thinking it might be an overnight thing and

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Speaker 2: he'll be fine.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. Maybe, yeah, maybe he just needs a second. Can

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Speaker 1: you scroll up just a little bit. Yeah, jac says,

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Speaker 1: I don't think she gave it to them to him

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Speaker 1: that bad, but it all comes down to the tone

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Speaker 1: of how she said it. I agreed, she could have

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Speaker 1: like what she said could have been really sweet, like

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Speaker 1: sweetly said, or it could have been kind of like Arah.

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Speaker 1: It depends. I told him that I was sorry for

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Speaker 1: being too critical. I've been before since I was five,

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Speaker 1: and my mom never gave me praise, only constructive criticism,

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Speaker 1: so I grew up thinking that caring about someone meant

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Speaker 1: telling them how they could improve. I should have told

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Speaker 1: him how proud I was first, before I told him

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Speaker 1: what I didn't like.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 1: I think when you're a performer and you've been doing it,

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Speaker 1: like as a person who is a performer and has

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Speaker 1: been doing it also since I was five, you too, Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I've been a performer as well since I was five.

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Speaker 1: What have you been doing? Uh?

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Speaker 2: Christmas plays?

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Speaker 1: Nice? Nice?

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Speaker 2: That counts, Yeah, yeah it does.

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Speaker 1: But I think when you've been doing it for really long,

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Speaker 1: and someone who you care a lot about is doing

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Speaker 1: it for maybe the first time and is very new.

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Speaker 1: I think you do have to be gentle about how

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Speaker 1: you talk about it and how you give you I

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Speaker 1: think you can give critique that is helpful, but I

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Speaker 1: think it is you have to be very careful, especially

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Speaker 1: with new people, because like, if someone said that to me,

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Speaker 1: I would probably like hurt a little bit. But I

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Speaker 1: think that you know, I've been given a lot of

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Speaker 1: criticism and direction over my life that I don't think

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Speaker 1: it would be like this is the end of my career. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: but he's new, so I'd be like, you're so good,

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Speaker 1: Maybe like we can practice the material next time, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: something like that. Let's ye going. He says, I've ruined

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Speaker 1: his debut performance and nothing will change that. Is there

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Speaker 1: anything I can do? I told him I would work

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Speaker 1: on being less critical, but he says it doesn't fix

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Speaker 1: anything that already happened. Do I just have to accept

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Speaker 1: he's going to be mad at me for the next

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Speaker 1: however long?

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Speaker 2: All right, honestly, buddy, I don't think this career is

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Speaker 2: for You's gonna be real.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's it. I mean, I again, I think that

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Speaker 1: she could have said it nicely, like much nicer, or

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Speaker 1: maybe she could have said it in a better way.

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Speaker 1: But stand up comedy is like one of the most

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Speaker 1: brutal forms of performance because it's so heavily relies on

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Speaker 1: the audience being on your side at all times. So yeah,

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Speaker 1: I mean she get used to it. Yeah, Oh yeah,

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Speaker 1: I think she can. I think she can baby step

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Speaker 1: him into this constructively.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, being the wife.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, just be a little bit. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I am one curious to seeing how he would take

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Speaker 2: it from other people.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, is this is it just because he

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Speaker 1: had to see some.

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Speaker 2: People not laughing at his jokes? Okay about it?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know. I think right, I think maybe

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Speaker 1: she could have worded it better. And I think he's

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Speaker 1: being a little bit dramatic. That's my that's my take

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Speaker 1: on this. Jacquelin Shanard says, I think that if he

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Speaker 1: is reacting this way to her, how will he react

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Speaker 1: to a big shot telling him he sex? Yeah? I

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Speaker 1: think that's how Yeah, that was our point. It's yeah,

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Speaker 1: love Level says In this career, though, criticism is always

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Speaker 1: going to be there, sometimes even yelled at from the crowd.

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Speaker 1: Hackling is a huge part of it. Is freaking stand

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Speaker 1: up comedy. You have to be ready to, you know,

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Speaker 1: either ignore it or punch back. Yeah, but let's get

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Speaker 1: into some of these relevant comments commentary. One commenter says,

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Speaker 1: here's some constructive criticism for you. Don't lead with what

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Speaker 1: he did wrong and then followed up with what he

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Speaker 1: did well, And Opie says, no, you're right. When I

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Speaker 1: got criticism for my mom, there was never any what

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Speaker 1: I did well, So I never really learned how to

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Speaker 1: give good feedback to loved ones. And at my job,

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Speaker 1: people appreciate my bluntness, I specifically.

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Speaker 2: And she's a blunt person to you.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, blunt people and me.

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Speaker 2: I don't know. I just I have a hard time

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Speaker 2: with blunt people.

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Speaker 1: My mom's a very blunt person, so I think I

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Speaker 1: am kind of used to it.

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Speaker 2: That's good, that's good. I've learned your mother. Yeah, I

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Speaker 2: appreciate your mom.

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Speaker 1: Now, you know. Yeah, you know had a doctor. I

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Speaker 1: specifically sought out for feedback. Oh, I am specifically sought

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Speaker 1: out for feedback because I don't sugarcoat and just give

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Speaker 1: it to people straight. But my husband is a kind

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Speaker 1: and sensitive soul, and I love him so much. I

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Speaker 1: feel horrible that I heard him. This whole thing is

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Speaker 1: maybe step back and reflect on how I communicate with him. Okay,

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Speaker 1: before I move on, props to op. Props to op.

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Speaker 1: Op was like, you know what, you guys are right.

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Speaker 1: I should have taken it in. This is something that

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Speaker 1: I grew up with and I need to reckon with

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Speaker 1: and grow and learn from it because I'm realizing that

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Speaker 1: my husband doesn't. This isn't an effective way to communicate

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Speaker 1: with my husband, and we need to like find a

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Speaker 1: better way for us.

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Speaker 2: I just I just love that having a fight because

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Speaker 2: he just made jokes. Yeah, she's like front of kind

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Speaker 2: of bad in front of like a hundred people.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, well probably not one hundred people. It's probably a

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Speaker 1: small open. You're right exactly at me. But let's read

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Speaker 1: this reply. Another Commenty says, here's another you're a grown woman.

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Speaker 1: Oh you're a grown adult. You aren't at work, you're

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Speaker 1: not your mother and didn't marry a child. Stop using

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Speaker 1: your mother and job as excuses. Accept accountability for your

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Speaker 1: actions and words. Treat your husband as a husband. I

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Speaker 1: think it sounds like the aggressive she literally did. She

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Speaker 1: was just saying this is how I was and why,

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Speaker 1: and I'm gonna move and grow. Jesus read it Jesus.

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Speaker 2: Red pill, you gotta stay, go back.

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Speaker 1: Calm down, Jess. She literally said, I want to learn

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Speaker 1: from this razy risy. That's good to do. OP says,

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Speaker 1: I know I messed up. That's why I apologized. I

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Speaker 1: provided that information for context, not as an excuse. I

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Speaker 1: understand it doesn't justify my actions. And then, in response

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Speaker 1: to another person, OP, he continues, trying to understand why

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Speaker 1: you are the way you are is no not making excuses,

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Speaker 1: its introspection to try to understand why you did the

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Speaker 1: thing you did. If I messed up at work because

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Speaker 1: a process failed, I'd go back and examine the process

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Speaker 1: to figure out what went wrong and learn from it.

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Speaker 1: I wouldn't be excusing the error. I'd be fixing it.

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Speaker 1: I can deal with people saying I was an a hole.

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Speaker 1: I was, even if unintentionally. I've also agreed multiple times

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Speaker 1: that I've messed up. My only point in bringing up

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Speaker 1: my mother is that I realized that my idea what

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Speaker 1: support is was shaped by her, and her support wasn't

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Speaker 1: actually support at all. Not an excuse, not a justification,

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Speaker 1: just a realization that there's an issue with my psyche

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Speaker 1: that I'm responsible for fixing. Yeah, ob just doing grey,

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Speaker 1: doing grey, I mean, yeah, big props, big props. And

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Speaker 1: then another commenture says best most well received constructive criticism.

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Speaker 1: Criticism means the sandwich method, a compliment, what could be

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Speaker 1: done better? Another compliment, which is what really suggested. I'm

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Speaker 1: surprised were so into the concept of constructive criticism, but

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Speaker 1: don't actually do it correctly. Geez, stop attacking this woman.

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Speaker 1: She's trying. But also he kind of sucks too. You

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Speaker 1: were the only one who didn't laugh. Sounds like he's

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Speaker 1: willing to bend reality to make you the main villain

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Speaker 1: of the story. Not much you can do about that,

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Speaker 1: And if I were you, I would also correct that

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Speaker 1: by pointing out most people didn't laugh. I love that

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Speaker 1: they were, like, well, you should do constructive criticism better.

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Speaker 1: But also shoot him in the foot and tell him

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Speaker 1: that no one was laughing if it may make him

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Speaker 1: hurt more. But I'm not going to enable some alternative

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Speaker 1: reality in which I was the bad guy just so

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Speaker 1: he feels better. But you should still have done the sandwich.

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Speaker 1: I would apologize for being harsh and give him time,

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Speaker 1: but you already apologized, so I guess give him time now.

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Speaker 1: And in the future take into account that sometimes people

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Speaker 1: just want a pat on the back, not constructive you know, criticism.

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Speaker 2: You know, some I view read it as like these

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Speaker 2: people have never been in relationships and they're giving advice. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: like like you know people that are like hey, people

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Speaker 2: that haven't like been in YouTube videos and they're like, hey,

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Speaker 2: you should do this or that, and it's sort of like, well,

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Speaker 2: you know, you know what I mean, Yeah, what it

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Speaker 2: feels like.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, they're like, I know nothing about this. Take all

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Speaker 1: of my advice as gospel. Yeah, so true.

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Speaker 2: I'm trying to Yeah, this is just like are the

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Speaker 2: is this all the relevant comments? Just like, yeah, black

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Speaker 2: and honor pretty much.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna There's one importance tidbit in one of Op's

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Speaker 1: comments that I will read, which is where Op basically says,

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Speaker 1: if you scroll down to that's actually really insightful and helpful.

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Speaker 1: They're responding to one commenter and I would be kind

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Speaker 1: of talking about, uh uh, the gender roles in the relationship.

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Speaker 1: So I'll start from there. Are already knew we were

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Speaker 1: gender swapped in most aspects. He's a stay at home

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Speaker 1: parent and I'm the primary breadwinner. He's kind and nurturing,

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Speaker 1: I'm cold and ambitious. He's creative. I'm analytical. We've actually

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Speaker 1: discussed this issue before in regards to our child, because

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Speaker 1: I don't want to be an emotionally unavailable mom. But

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Speaker 1: I had realized how my issues were already impacting communication

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Speaker 1: with my husband. Oh but I hadn't realized how my

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Speaker 1: issues were already impacting communication with my husband until this incident.

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Speaker 1: And then it kind of goes back and forth with

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Speaker 1: commenters ragging on Opie and I'll be trying to be like,

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Speaker 1: I just tried to help. Uh, but there is Ooh,

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Speaker 1: what about some op background an update? Oh, but we

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Speaker 1: can get into Ope's background before we get into this update.

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Speaker 1: Opie says, I'm not an expert in stand up comedy.

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Speaker 1: I did do improv comedy for over a decade and

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Speaker 1: sketch comedy for about the same amount of time, so

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Speaker 1: I'm not a complete novice. But it is different, Yes

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Speaker 1: it is. My analysis was that because it was an

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Speaker 1: extended joke, basically different spins on the same joke. If

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Speaker 1: people don't buy into that initial joke, you've lost them

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Speaker 1: for the whole set. And when the initial joke is

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Speaker 1: a wiener joke and the crowd skews older. Realistically, you're

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Speaker 1: going to lose quite a few people right from the start,

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Speaker 1: I suggested. If he wants to keep it, coming up

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Speaker 1: with variations on the Wiener joke, or figuring out a

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Speaker 1: way to incorporate other jokes into the set, but keep

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Speaker 1: the Wiener joke as the running theme, just not the

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Speaker 1: sole joke. I stand by my criticism, I don't stand

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Speaker 1: by my delivery.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. I like it when when people like breaking up,

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Speaker 2: break it up, break up, like, it's not just one joke.

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Speaker 1: It's like, oh, you were saying, like I like when

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Speaker 1: people break up like in the relationship.

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Speaker 2: No, I would have my hat on.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, break say that again.

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Speaker 2: Break up jokes, it's not just one big joke.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, you have kind of a I like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I think when I see stand up comedy, I like

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Speaker 1: when they have multiple jokes and then they have like

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Speaker 1: connection that they bring in again, so like, you know,

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Speaker 1: whatever the first was, they bring it back, and then

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Speaker 1: it's kind of ties everything together. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: True.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, jac says, So she's been in the industry before,

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Speaker 1: wants to help her husband, but yet she's the problem.

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Speaker 1: I don't see that being that big of an issue,

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Speaker 1: as the Reddit comments are making it seem to be. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I think it's I think they're all over blowing it.

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Speaker 1: I think, oh, he probably you know, could have said

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Speaker 1: it a lot nicer or in a softer way. But

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Speaker 1: people do that all the time. It's not the you know,

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Speaker 1: it's not relationship ending. They just need to talk about

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Speaker 1: how to you know, discuss criticism and stuff.

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Speaker 2: It's a learning experience people. Yeah, this is good. I

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Speaker 2: think this is going in a good direction.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I don't think anyone's a divorce.

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Speaker 1: Yes, this is over. No, I don't think they're gonna

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Speaker 1: get a divorce. I don't think they're anywhere near divorced

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Speaker 1: territory at all.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. I think he's good, he's fine.

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Speaker 1: I think he was probably being a little drama dramatic,

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Speaker 1: and I thought I think she was being a little

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Speaker 1: bit blunt. They can work out. They can work this out.

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Speaker 2: It's fine.

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Speaker 1: Or will they? But there is an update two days

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Speaker 1: later this ooh. But before we get into it, let's

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Speaker 1: get into some donations. Also, welcome everyone in the stream.

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Speaker 1: I didn't say that, but thank you for coming. This

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Speaker 1: is our secret Riley Sophia's stream where we have one

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Speaker 1: Wait how many people.

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Speaker 2: Like face or thirty six and forty four and Facebook

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Speaker 2: three hundred and YouTube and hello Twitch, we.

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Speaker 1: See hello Twitch SHOT's lot three fifty one. Welcome, Welcome

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Speaker 1: everyone to the stream. Thanks for coming like it, like

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Speaker 1: the stream because we've got a lot of people here.

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Speaker 1: And not that man he likes come on, but the

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Speaker 1: one hundred and sixty five people who already liked your

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Speaker 1: my favorites.

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Speaker 2: WHOA, there's still time to be her favorite.

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Speaker 1: There's still time. You have one hour and forty four

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Speaker 1: minutes to be one of my favorites. Jessica Cheviz, thank

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Speaker 1: you for celebrating your three months of membership. Love you guys,

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Speaker 1: always there when I need to relax. Oh well, and

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Speaker 1: we'll be there forever.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, we have so much content.

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Speaker 1: Got so much content. Christina Mani, thank you for celebrating

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00:17:22,840 --> 00:17:26,120
Speaker 1: your two months of membership. Hi. Thanks to who gifted

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00:17:26,440 --> 00:17:29,879
Speaker 1: new Me membership. Thank you to Yeah, thank you too.

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Speaker 1: Over that person was Matt Hattergall, Thank you for the

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Speaker 1: ten bucks. Even if she told him what he wanted

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Speaker 1: to hear, the husband would still get mad at someone

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Speaker 1: for not laughing at his jokes or even booing at him. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: there might have been a world where she didn't mention anything,

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Speaker 1: and he was like, oh, the crowd sucked tonight. They

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Speaker 1: were just you know, they were the worst crowd. And yeah,

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00:17:51,920 --> 00:17:53,600
Speaker 1: you can't really blame the crowd. You have to kind

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Speaker 1: of figure out what in your set was going wrong.

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Speaker 2: And sometimes it is the crowd, like if you're ail

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Speaker 2: doing jokes for gen Z or gen Z doing jokes

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Speaker 2: for older people.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, sometimes you do get like less energetic crowds or

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00:18:07,960 --> 00:18:10,840
Speaker 1: sometimes you know, there's not that many people there. But

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Speaker 1: I think you do have to be able to just accordingly,

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Speaker 1: especially in stand up snorting catnip. Thank you for the

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Speaker 1: five buck tip. Hey, okayopy, Hey, who who's that? Who's that?

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Speaker 2: I have no idea what you're talking.

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Speaker 1: I haven't heard that name in years. I've been a

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Speaker 1: long time listener now right towards the beginning, but I

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Speaker 1: be lurking into shadows anyway, first time actually making it

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Speaker 1: too a live and you guys have helped me through

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00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:42,600
Speaker 1: so much. Thank you for everything you guys do. Hugs

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Speaker 1: from my family. That's sweet.

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Speaker 2: Well, I'm so glad that other channel could help you

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Speaker 2: do that.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm so glad that that other channel. That's not us.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, we're okay, story time. I don't know who those are.

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Speaker 1: But thank you for the very sweet message. We appreciate you.

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Speaker 1: Let's get into it. Yeah, okay, I gave my husband

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Speaker 1: time and space like some of you suggested, and after

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Speaker 1: a day he brought it up with me again.

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Speaker 2: Okay, okay, all right, all right.

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Speaker 1: He said my criticism was fair and helpful, but telling

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Speaker 1: him what I did when I did, hurt him and

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Speaker 1: took away from an otherwise great night. Essentially, it wasn't

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Speaker 1: what I said, it was when I said it. Okay, okay,

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Speaker 1: all right, okay. I think I think, especially for a

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Speaker 1: creative thing like performance, you have to wait until someone asks,

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Speaker 1: which he kind of did, but wait until someone says, hey,

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Speaker 1: do you have any critique? Do you have any suggestions

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Speaker 1: of how I can improve? Because I think unwarranted criticism,

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Speaker 1: especially from a fellow performer, is like nah, it doesn't

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Speaker 1: always feel great because I've had people do that, like

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Speaker 1: in classes where they come up to me and they're like, hey,

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Speaker 1: can I give you a suggestion? I'm like, I didn't

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Speaker 1: actually ask for that, thank you that I'm like a much,

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00:20:00,040 --> 00:20:03,159
Speaker 1: you're my teacher, or I'm asking you for you know,

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Speaker 1: advice or suggestion. Don't give it to me.

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Speaker 2: Unless it's slick and you're like Bruce Wayne, then you can.

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Speaker 1: Unless I don't even realize you're doing it. Where was I? Uh?

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Speaker 1: I apologized again and told him that I hoped he

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Speaker 1: would continue to do stand up because it seemed like

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Speaker 1: it made him happy. And that's some people there, And

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Speaker 1: that's some people there found and funny. I love that

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00:20:29,440 --> 00:20:33,800
Speaker 1: some people there did find you actually funny. Yeah, Emphysisn's

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00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:37,040
Speaker 1: We talked for a while after that about his set.

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Speaker 1: I used the crap sandwich technique y'all suggested, and he

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Speaker 1: said he agreed with and appreciated the feedback. So I

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00:20:45,680 --> 00:20:50,920
Speaker 1: was like that, sorry, let me move it down. Okay,

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Speaker 1: he's still hurt because what I did will always cloud

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Speaker 1: the joy associated with his first stand up experience. And

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Speaker 1: he said he doesn't know if he wants me to

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Speaker 1: come see him if he does it again.

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Speaker 2: Oh well come on, dude, Oh.

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Speaker 1: Well maybe you know, maybe he just needs a second

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Speaker 1: to get his footing. And then he's like, Okay, once

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Speaker 1: I've kind of got the hang of it, then you

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Speaker 1: can come back. Yeah, which is fair. I don't think

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00:21:15,680 --> 00:21:20,520
Speaker 1: that's necessarily like crazy. I think performing is sometimes a

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00:21:20,600 --> 00:21:23,600
Speaker 1: very intimate thing, and it's scary to have people you

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Speaker 1: know see it, because when you don't know them, it's

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Speaker 1: like who cares? He's still hurt? Always said that. But overall,

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Speaker 1: U oh, And he said he doesn't know if he

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Speaker 1: wants me to come see him if he does it again,

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Speaker 1: which I agreed was fair, although I hope he does

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Speaker 1: eventually let me come. But overall, I think we're in

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Speaker 1: a good place. We're going on a date this weekend

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Speaker 1: and we're both really looking forward to it. Yeay kid.

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Speaker 1: As far as my mother, some of you seem to

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Speaker 1: think I was using her criticism of me to excuse

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Speaker 1: my behavior. I wasn't trying to explain that. In my

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Speaker 1: child brain, I interpreted my mom tearing me down as love,

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Speaker 1: because how else do you rationalize that as a young child,

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Speaker 1: and because that's how I learned to show love. That's

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Speaker 1: what I did to my husband. People told me I

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Speaker 1: should have been supportive, but I thought I was being

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Speaker 1: supportive because that's how it was modeled for me. It's

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Speaker 1: something I haven't confronted until I was lying awake trying

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Speaker 1: to figure out why I would hurt someone I love,

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Speaker 1: Now that I know, I asked my husband if he

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Speaker 1: had been if I had been overly critical of him before.

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Speaker 1: He said yes, but up until this point he had

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Speaker 1: shrugged it off and let it go.

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Speaker 2: Like we're having sex.

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Speaker 1: She's like, this sucks, but thank you dude.

434
00:22:41,040 --> 00:22:44,679
Speaker 2: Sorry, imagine like, no, never mind, I can't okay. I

435
00:22:44,680 --> 00:22:45,680
Speaker 2: was thinking about Gordon.

436
00:22:45,560 --> 00:22:49,639
Speaker 1: Ramsay, indiot, Sandwich, what are you?

437
00:22:50,880 --> 00:22:52,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, this is what I feel like she would.

438
00:22:52,320 --> 00:22:58,360
Speaker 1: Be like, Yeah, so she's like, crap, sandwich. It might

439
00:22:58,400 --> 00:23:00,720
Speaker 1: be though, Oh I told him to please call me

440
00:23:00,760 --> 00:23:03,320
Speaker 1: out on it going forward. It might be the way

441
00:23:03,359 --> 00:23:05,399
Speaker 1: I am right now, but it's not the way I

442
00:23:05,480 --> 00:23:08,399
Speaker 1: want to be, especially for a child. Now that I

443
00:23:08,480 --> 00:23:10,280
Speaker 1: figured out the root of the problem, I feel like

444
00:23:10,320 --> 00:23:14,080
Speaker 1: I have a better chance of changing myself. Hell yeah,

445
00:23:14,320 --> 00:23:18,440
Speaker 1: oh peace, look introspective. Oh pie's doing a little dig

446
00:23:18,480 --> 00:23:22,000
Speaker 1: in in the old psyche so that she can be

447
00:23:22,160 --> 00:23:25,879
Speaker 1: a better wife and a better mother, and we love that,

448
00:23:26,359 --> 00:23:29,680
Speaker 1: and just to be a better person in general. Great

449
00:23:29,800 --> 00:23:35,800
Speaker 1: great stuff. Others have said my husband doesn't have the

450
00:23:35,840 --> 00:23:38,800
Speaker 1: mentality to succeed in comedy because of his reaction to

451
00:23:38,840 --> 00:23:39,480
Speaker 1: my criticism.

452
00:23:39,560 --> 00:23:40,800
Speaker 2: Dude, it's just the first one.

453
00:23:40,880 --> 00:23:45,280
Speaker 1: It's the first one. Hell yeah, it's tough. Maybe maybe not.

454
00:23:45,680 --> 00:23:47,600
Speaker 1: I think he would have been receptive to it if

455
00:23:47,640 --> 00:23:50,400
Speaker 1: I had waited until the excitement and post performance high

456
00:23:50,440 --> 00:23:53,439
Speaker 1: had worn off. And getting negative feedback from your spouse

457
00:23:53,520 --> 00:23:57,320
Speaker 1: is different than random strangers. Lastly, more than a couple

458
00:23:57,400 --> 00:24:00,520
Speaker 1: of you suggested I gave him a BJS. He gets

459
00:24:00,520 --> 00:24:08,240
Speaker 1: over it. What's the reddit? Reddit? Stop? I'm not planning

460
00:24:08,280 --> 00:24:11,800
Speaker 1: on using spicy sleep to replace communication in our marriage.

461
00:24:12,000 --> 00:24:13,359
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, you shouldn't.

462
00:24:13,720 --> 00:24:17,879
Speaker 1: Yeah, you shouldn't. I'm kind of surprised that works for anyone,

463
00:24:17,920 --> 00:24:18,520
Speaker 1: to be honest.

464
00:24:18,720 --> 00:24:23,920
Speaker 2: Dude, if she did that, though, anytime, anytime she would

465
00:24:23,920 --> 00:24:27,000
Speaker 2: talk mean to him, he'd get hard, get get it

466
00:24:27,200 --> 00:24:27,600
Speaker 2: turned on.

467
00:24:27,800 --> 00:24:31,720
Speaker 1: He just associates her being like blood yeah, and like

468
00:24:31,800 --> 00:24:33,320
Speaker 1: criticizing him, And he's like, no.

469
00:24:34,000 --> 00:24:36,880
Speaker 2: Stop stop talking me to me, stop make me come

470
00:24:37,000 --> 00:24:40,760
Speaker 2: you know, okay, okay, and you need to be more specific.

471
00:24:41,160 --> 00:24:43,479
Speaker 1: I'm kind of surprised that works for anyone to be honest.

472
00:24:43,720 --> 00:24:47,200
Speaker 1: To everyone who replied, thanks for your input. I feel

473
00:24:47,240 --> 00:24:49,639
Speaker 1: like I've learned a lot in the past forty eight hours,

474
00:24:49,680 --> 00:24:52,399
Speaker 1: and I'm slightly mortified that this has apparently been a

475
00:24:52,400 --> 00:24:55,280
Speaker 1: thing my husband has been suffering in silence with for

476
00:24:55,400 --> 00:24:58,560
Speaker 1: a while now. Hopefully this will help me be a

477
00:24:58,600 --> 00:25:02,439
Speaker 1: better partner going forward. Word and that is where that

478
00:25:02,520 --> 00:25:03,720
Speaker 1: story that is beautiful.

479
00:25:04,600 --> 00:25:06,879
Speaker 2: I feel like there's a rainbow. Okay, this is but

480
00:25:06,960 --> 00:25:08,720
Speaker 2: I just feel like it ended in a rainbow. This

481
00:25:08,760 --> 00:25:09,639
Speaker 2: is the only rainbow we have.

482
00:25:09,760 --> 00:25:14,600
Speaker 1: But that's the only rad there's no okay, story time we.

483
00:25:13,880 --> 00:25:16,920
Speaker 2: Actually they're kind of is. I can tell one. Growing

484
00:25:17,000 --> 00:25:20,960
Speaker 2: up playing basketball, my dad would give me like constriction criticism,

485
00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:22,919
Speaker 2: but he would always lead with like, I'm proud of

486
00:25:22,920 --> 00:25:26,160
Speaker 2: you. You did good, but yeah he didn't rebround, he didn't

487
00:25:26,160 --> 00:25:27,880
Speaker 2: box out, and then just stuff like that.

488
00:25:28,119 --> 00:25:30,280
Speaker 1: Well yeah, no, I mean, especially when you're learning, like

489
00:25:30,320 --> 00:25:37,240
Speaker 1: someone's teaching you something. I think it is is different Josephine.

490
00:25:39,920 --> 00:25:42,920
Speaker 1: But yeah, no, I think I think this story ended well.

491
00:25:43,119 --> 00:25:45,560
Speaker 1: I'm glad that they communicated. I don't think there's any

492
00:25:45,600 --> 00:25:47,800
Speaker 1: issues in their marriage that are gonna, like, you know,

493
00:25:47,960 --> 00:25:52,280
Speaker 1: lead to divorce right now by any means. Yeah, I

494
00:25:52,320 --> 00:25:56,919
Speaker 1: think I think again, whenever you know, you see someone

495
00:25:58,480 --> 00:26:01,679
Speaker 1: like trying out a new hobby, I think it is

496
00:26:01,760 --> 00:26:05,800
Speaker 1: fair to kind of give them a grace period and

497
00:26:05,880 --> 00:26:10,400
Speaker 1: wait for them to ask for advice. Yeah, because they

498
00:26:10,480 --> 00:26:15,240
Speaker 1: know they're new. They presumably unless he's like wildly confident,

499
00:26:15,680 --> 00:26:18,479
Speaker 1: he knows that, you know, this is not the best

500
00:26:18,520 --> 00:26:22,439
Speaker 1: of the best stand up. He's probably just excited that

501
00:26:22,520 --> 00:26:24,000
Speaker 1: he felt good about it, you know.

502
00:26:24,160 --> 00:26:25,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's like.

503
00:26:25,240 --> 00:26:28,040
Speaker 1: I wasn't nervous. I wasn't breaking down that to win

504
00:26:28,160 --> 00:26:32,159
Speaker 1: for me. And I don't think that you have to

505
00:26:32,200 --> 00:26:34,800
Speaker 1: be amazing when you start, you know, when you just

506
00:26:35,000 --> 00:26:37,600
Speaker 1: start out on something. So just giving people grace periods.

507
00:26:38,359 --> 00:26:40,360
Speaker 2: I'm gonna be so nervous whenever I do my first

508
00:26:40,400 --> 00:26:40,800
Speaker 2: stand up.

509
00:26:41,080 --> 00:26:42,199
Speaker 1: I will be supportive of you.

510
00:26:42,359 --> 00:26:42,760
Speaker 2: Thank you.

511
00:26:42,960 --> 00:26:44,920
Speaker 1: I will not give you criticism unless you ask you.

512
00:26:45,000 --> 00:26:47,040
Speaker 2: Okay, I'm just gonna I'm thinking about doing a bit

513
00:26:47,080 --> 00:26:50,280
Speaker 2: about just like like a whole hour.

514
00:26:56,240 --> 00:26:58,359
Speaker 1: But let's get into this next.

515
00:26:58,400 --> 00:26:58,680
Speaker 2: Let's go.

516
00:26:59,640 --> 00:27:03,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, am I the a hole for editing the photos

517
00:27:03,200 --> 00:27:07,800
Speaker 1: I took up my girlfriend? Depends on how you edited them? Yeah?

518
00:27:07,840 --> 00:27:10,359
Speaker 2: Did you make her like super saturated? Yeah?

519
00:27:10,400 --> 00:27:12,719
Speaker 1: Like was it did you make her look like weird?

520
00:27:13,600 --> 00:27:16,280
Speaker 1: Or was it just like you know, you were changing

521
00:27:16,320 --> 00:27:19,160
Speaker 1: the the I don't know the background.

522
00:27:19,320 --> 00:27:21,240
Speaker 2: Do you take a class for this or you just

523
00:27:21,280 --> 00:27:22,280
Speaker 2: do it for fun?

524
00:27:22,359 --> 00:27:24,960
Speaker 1: You're just doing it off the cuff. He's like, I

525
00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:27,240
Speaker 1: don't know, I couldn't. This could work right here. We

526
00:27:27,240 --> 00:27:30,520
Speaker 1: could turn up the brightness and add a little green

527
00:27:30,520 --> 00:27:35,159
Speaker 1: in the background, maybe like a photoshop some oh.

528
00:27:35,040 --> 00:27:38,840
Speaker 2: My gosh stuff in I okay, we did. We did

529
00:27:38,840 --> 00:27:39,560
Speaker 2: the game show there.

530
00:27:39,640 --> 00:27:42,240
Speaker 1: Yeah, it was really fun. I'm actually really excited for

531
00:27:42,240 --> 00:27:43,800
Speaker 1: you guys to see it. Really well.

532
00:27:44,160 --> 00:27:46,520
Speaker 2: I did some photoshopping for it, and I cannot wait

533
00:27:46,560 --> 00:27:47,560
Speaker 2: for you guys to see it.

534
00:27:47,680 --> 00:27:50,919
Speaker 1: Yeah. I didn't realize when you see the video, this

535
00:27:50,920 --> 00:27:53,200
Speaker 1: will make sense. But we didn't realize that Riley had

536
00:27:53,240 --> 00:27:57,000
Speaker 1: photoshop photos. We thought people had sent in these photos

537
00:27:57,440 --> 00:27:59,960
Speaker 1: that they had photoshopped, and we were like, why is

538
00:28:00,080 --> 00:28:04,320
Speaker 1: everyone have photoshop? Like this doesn't make sense.

539
00:28:04,520 --> 00:28:05,200
Speaker 2: It's beautiful.

540
00:28:05,320 --> 00:28:07,560
Speaker 1: Jacy says, I'm thinking you're the a hole. But let's

541
00:28:07,560 --> 00:28:10,760
Speaker 1: see where this goes. Yeah, I think it's a little

542
00:28:10,760 --> 00:28:15,280
Speaker 1: bit risky to, you know, photoshop your your girlfriend's photos,

543
00:28:15,359 --> 00:28:20,199
Speaker 1: but we'll see. So John Wicks, a Jedi, said, my

544
00:28:20,560 --> 00:28:23,560
Speaker 1: thirty male girlfriend thirty five female and I have been

545
00:28:23,600 --> 00:28:27,359
Speaker 1: together for almost a year now, but she was clear

546
00:28:27,440 --> 00:28:29,520
Speaker 1: even on our first date that she wants to take

547
00:28:29,600 --> 00:28:32,920
Speaker 1: Oh sorry, I already know. I want to marry her someday,

548
00:28:32,960 --> 00:28:35,520
Speaker 1: but she was clear even on our first date that

549
00:28:35,600 --> 00:28:38,840
Speaker 1: she wants to take things slow, and we have. She's

550
00:28:38,880 --> 00:28:42,160
Speaker 1: a very beautiful woman and also black. I'm white. No

551
00:28:42,240 --> 00:28:46,440
Speaker 1: big deal, but this comes into play. I already know

552
00:28:46,480 --> 00:28:52,600
Speaker 1: where this is going, and I'm worried. Oh no, oh no,

553
00:28:53,000 --> 00:28:58,600
Speaker 1: put in ICU in the comments. I'm worried. Ah Someone

554
00:28:58,640 --> 00:29:03,120
Speaker 1: said I already think this is as ale, and based

555
00:29:03,120 --> 00:29:08,920
Speaker 1: off of that first paragraph, I'm ooh, ooh, yikes, yikes, ecikes.

556
00:29:08,960 --> 00:29:12,080
Speaker 1: Can we put a pole just to just your immediate

557
00:29:12,080 --> 00:29:15,280
Speaker 1: thoughts ahole, not a whole because and then we can

558
00:29:15,360 --> 00:29:17,800
Speaker 1: do another pole and see if it changes at the end,

559
00:29:17,880 --> 00:29:24,920
Speaker 1: because right now not good. I posted a photo on

560
00:29:25,040 --> 00:29:27,760
Speaker 1: Facebook of us after we agreed to be exclusive and

561
00:29:27,880 --> 00:29:28,800
Speaker 1: an official couple.

562
00:29:29,080 --> 00:29:29,480
Speaker 2: Let's go.

563
00:29:29,720 --> 00:29:31,840
Speaker 1: I did touch up the photo a bit, and when

564
00:29:31,840 --> 00:29:34,880
Speaker 1: she came over, she asked about what I did to

565
00:29:35,080 --> 00:29:40,040
Speaker 1: change the photo. I was honest with her and told

566
00:29:40,040 --> 00:29:43,920
Speaker 1: her I did use a lightning tool, as she's very

567
00:29:44,000 --> 00:29:49,880
Speaker 1: dark skinned, and I felt her mood shift entirely. M Oh, yeah,

568
00:29:50,000 --> 00:29:53,040
Speaker 1: jac you were right. Something tells me he's going to

569
00:29:53,120 --> 00:30:01,800
Speaker 1: somehow whitewash her. Ugh, you can't. You can't be doing that. Especially,

570
00:30:01,880 --> 00:30:04,880
Speaker 1: you know, if you want to make sure that your

571
00:30:04,960 --> 00:30:07,880
Speaker 1: girlfriend who has dark skin looks good in a photo,

572
00:30:07,960 --> 00:30:11,360
Speaker 1: then learn how to like take the photo, because there

573
00:30:11,400 --> 00:30:15,360
Speaker 1: are ways and there are cameras that can take very

574
00:30:15,440 --> 00:30:18,040
Speaker 1: good photos of dark skinned people, but you have to

575
00:30:18,120 --> 00:30:22,160
Speaker 1: like look into that. Don't just lighten her, because that's

576
00:30:23,040 --> 00:30:31,000
Speaker 1: that's bad. That's so bad. Oh god. She was overly

577
00:30:31,080 --> 00:30:33,960
Speaker 1: calm and asked me if her dark tone needed adjusting

578
00:30:34,120 --> 00:30:38,840
Speaker 1: that much in photos. Oh boy, Oh, she's setting him up.

579
00:30:38,880 --> 00:30:41,800
Speaker 1: She's like, how do you answer this? And I got

580
00:30:41,840 --> 00:30:44,920
Speaker 1: nervous and just joked that if she's darker than Lupita Nyango,

581
00:30:45,320 --> 00:30:48,080
Speaker 1: an actor she loves, then yeah, I had to lighten

582
00:30:48,080 --> 00:30:51,880
Speaker 1: her up a bit. He's making it worse. He's making

583
00:30:51,960 --> 00:30:59,160
Speaker 1: it worse. Oh god, oh god, this is so bad. Yeah,

584
00:30:59,200 --> 00:31:04,520
Speaker 1: everyone Teddy's is prevorce. Oh my god. Adasha Stardus says,

585
00:31:04,560 --> 00:31:06,160
Speaker 1: does he have a problem with a race? This is

586
00:31:06,200 --> 00:31:09,160
Speaker 1: super weird. This is very weird.

587
00:31:09,280 --> 00:31:10,640
Speaker 2: It's either he has a problem with the race or

588
00:31:10,720 --> 00:31:11,800
Speaker 2: he's super oblivious.

589
00:31:12,320 --> 00:31:15,800
Speaker 1: Well, right now, he sounds like he's not thinking of it,

590
00:31:16,200 --> 00:31:18,920
Speaker 1: which is still an a whole move because if you

591
00:31:19,040 --> 00:31:22,240
Speaker 1: have a you know, a person of color as your partner,

592
00:31:22,480 --> 00:31:25,640
Speaker 1: you have to be very aware of the dynamics in

593
00:31:25,680 --> 00:31:29,920
Speaker 1: your relationship and to like take a photo and then

594
00:31:30,320 --> 00:31:34,400
Speaker 1: and then lighten it when colorism is such and like

595
00:31:34,600 --> 00:31:41,040
Speaker 1: racism is such, like like oh my god, like you like,

596
00:31:41,120 --> 00:31:44,400
Speaker 1: how oblivious can you be? How like dumb? Come on?

597
00:31:45,800 --> 00:31:46,440
Speaker 2: Um?

598
00:31:46,520 --> 00:31:49,320
Speaker 1: Yes, I have to say I think my girlfriend is

599
00:31:49,400 --> 00:31:53,240
Speaker 1: gorgeous and striking. She has these beautiful almost hazel eyes,

600
00:31:53,560 --> 00:31:56,600
Speaker 1: long curly, thick hair, and is toned like a midnight sky.

601
00:31:57,240 --> 00:31:59,719
Speaker 1: I've never seen anyone who looks like her in person,

602
00:32:00,440 --> 00:32:03,760
Speaker 1: and that's that's great at all, But you need to

603
00:32:04,120 --> 00:32:07,680
Speaker 1: use that photography to like emphasize that part of her

604
00:32:07,680 --> 00:32:10,000
Speaker 1: and not take away from it. If you think that's,

605
00:32:10,200 --> 00:32:12,640
Speaker 1: you know, a beautiful part of her, then emphasize it.

606
00:32:12,840 --> 00:32:16,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, Carmel, dude, Yeah, come on, come on.

607
00:32:18,120 --> 00:32:21,520
Speaker 1: Uh, here's where I may be in a hole. Just maybe.

608
00:32:22,120 --> 00:32:25,080
Speaker 1: I work in photography as a hobby after work and

609
00:32:25,160 --> 00:32:27,480
Speaker 1: mainly do weddings and such, but of little to no

610
00:32:27,600 --> 00:32:30,360
Speaker 1: experience in photos of people of color, so I asked

611
00:32:30,360 --> 00:32:32,760
Speaker 1: to do some test shoots with her. When I showed

612
00:32:32,800 --> 00:32:34,800
Speaker 1: her the touch up photos. She said that she looked

613
00:32:35,000 --> 00:32:37,840
Speaker 1: noticeably lighter in her skin tone and said that she

614
00:32:37,840 --> 00:32:43,760
Speaker 1: didn't really like it. Okay, okay, So before this photo

615
00:32:43,880 --> 00:32:49,680
Speaker 1: came out, they had already taken photos together and she

616
00:32:49,920 --> 00:32:53,520
Speaker 1: had expressed that she didn't like how she came out lighter. Ooh,

617
00:32:53,920 --> 00:32:57,240
Speaker 1: so this has already been talked about. And when that's

618
00:32:57,240 --> 00:33:00,920
Speaker 1: already been talked about, you go and learn how to

619
00:33:01,320 --> 00:33:04,239
Speaker 1: and like meet her standards. You go and learn. You

620
00:33:04,240 --> 00:33:06,640
Speaker 1: go and talk to your teacher or whatever or whoever

621
00:33:06,680 --> 00:33:08,920
Speaker 1: you're learning from, and you look up, how do I

622
00:33:08,960 --> 00:33:11,479
Speaker 1: take photos of black people? How do I take photos

623
00:33:11,480 --> 00:33:17,200
Speaker 1: of dark skinned people? Immediately? Immediately? If you plan on

624
00:33:17,240 --> 00:33:20,920
Speaker 1: taking more photos of her? Matd Hatter Girl says, this

625
00:33:21,000 --> 00:33:23,959
Speaker 1: actually happened to me. My best friend's ex girlfriend did this.

626
00:33:24,120 --> 00:33:26,880
Speaker 1: Every time we took photos. She would erase my freckles.

627
00:33:27,120 --> 00:33:28,480
Speaker 2: What wreckles?

628
00:33:29,080 --> 00:33:30,080
Speaker 1: That's so weird.

629
00:33:30,400 --> 00:33:32,320
Speaker 2: You like a filter on the and it took the

630
00:33:32,400 --> 00:33:36,800
Speaker 2: freckles aways are so fun, so.

631
00:33:36,840 --> 00:33:40,760
Speaker 1: Cute, that's very weird. I don't think I would ever

632
00:33:41,840 --> 00:33:44,600
Speaker 1: touch up unless someone asks. I mean, I don't do photography,

633
00:33:44,640 --> 00:33:47,040
Speaker 1: but I don't think if I did do photography, I

634
00:33:47,080 --> 00:33:49,959
Speaker 1: would ever touch up. Someone's photo. Like, if I were

635
00:33:50,000 --> 00:33:51,440
Speaker 1: in a photo of someone, I don't think I would

636
00:33:51,480 --> 00:33:53,880
Speaker 1: ever like change or alter how they looked in this.

637
00:33:54,080 --> 00:33:57,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, let me let me bake it off. I'll get freckles.

638
00:33:57,760 --> 00:33:59,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, you have freckles a little bit.

639
00:33:59,520 --> 00:34:01,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, but like they're not here yet.

640
00:34:02,080 --> 00:34:06,680
Speaker 1: Yeah. Teddy says he did this before. Yeah. Yes, she

641
00:34:06,880 --> 00:34:09,040
Speaker 1: already brought it up to him. This is already an

642
00:34:09,040 --> 00:34:12,400
Speaker 1: issue that's happened. Works. I honestly thought one of the

643
00:34:12,440 --> 00:34:17,680
Speaker 1: photos might very well be my favorite photover ever. Oh

644
00:34:17,680 --> 00:34:20,080
Speaker 1: and pointed out that I always think she's beautiful, but

645
00:34:20,120 --> 00:34:22,839
Speaker 1: this photo is the most beautiful I've ever seen her.

646
00:34:24,120 --> 00:34:30,600
Speaker 1: Stop stop digging yourself into a grave. She just told

647
00:34:30,640 --> 00:34:34,480
Speaker 1: her that you that she's uncomfortable about how light she

648
00:34:34,520 --> 00:34:36,320
Speaker 1: looks at this photo, And you're like, well, actually, I

649
00:34:36,360 --> 00:34:39,360
Speaker 1: think you look more beautiful when you're lighter.

650
00:34:39,719 --> 00:34:42,359
Speaker 2: Yeah. I wish that we could see these photos.

651
00:34:42,600 --> 00:34:45,160
Speaker 1: Oh my god. Yeah, Sydney the Kidney says, we need

652
00:34:45,160 --> 00:34:52,840
Speaker 1: to see these photos. Ah. He's just so dumb, oh god,

653
00:34:54,080 --> 00:34:57,440
Speaker 1: and like dumb in a way that like is also

654
00:34:57,880 --> 00:35:02,600
Speaker 1: like you're like, he's it's this is racism. He's just

655
00:35:02,680 --> 00:35:06,120
Speaker 1: not aware of it. Like He's like, Oh, it's not racist, but.

656
00:35:06,160 --> 00:35:10,320
Speaker 2: It you just look whenever a little lighter.

657
00:35:10,760 --> 00:35:17,120
Speaker 1: Let's just keep turning it up. What she asked me?

658
00:35:17,200 --> 00:35:20,720
Speaker 1: If that if I meant I wished her skin was lighter.

659
00:35:23,800 --> 00:35:26,600
Speaker 1: I feel so bad for this woman. I feel so

660
00:35:26,719 --> 00:35:31,560
Speaker 1: bad for oh. But I reassured her that I didn't

661
00:35:31,600 --> 00:35:34,080
Speaker 1: obsess about what I can't change.

662
00:35:34,719 --> 00:35:37,040
Speaker 2: Wait what, Oh my god.

663
00:35:38,080 --> 00:35:39,920
Speaker 1: I told her that I don't obsess about what I

664
00:35:39,920 --> 00:35:42,520
Speaker 1: can't change, and I always think she's the most attractive

665
00:35:42,560 --> 00:35:46,279
Speaker 1: person in the room. What do you mean you don't

666
00:35:46,280 --> 00:35:48,560
Speaker 1: obsess over what you can't change. That sounds like you

667
00:35:48,640 --> 00:35:52,720
Speaker 1: want to change it. Why are you phrasing these things

668
00:35:53,120 --> 00:35:55,160
Speaker 1: in the worst possible way?

669
00:35:56,520 --> 00:35:58,080
Speaker 2: How to not be racist? Class?

670
00:35:58,640 --> 00:36:02,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, stop taking your photography glasses and go to like

671
00:36:02,280 --> 00:36:05,080
Speaker 1: like a racial dynamic class like sensitive, go to a

672
00:36:05,160 --> 00:36:11,600
Speaker 1: racial sensitivity course. Please please? Wow? Ah, this is this

673
00:36:11,719 --> 00:36:15,839
Speaker 1: is so bad. She started talking about how she was

674
00:36:16,000 --> 00:36:20,040
Speaker 1: discriminated against, and I quickly backtracked because I felt like

675
00:36:20,080 --> 00:36:22,960
Speaker 1: she was trying to say I might be racist. I

676
00:36:23,000 --> 00:36:23,319
Speaker 1: am not.

677
00:36:24,080 --> 00:36:26,200
Speaker 2: I have a black girlfriend. I'm not racist.

678
00:36:26,560 --> 00:36:30,880
Speaker 1: My girlfriend's a black girlfriend. I can't be racist. And

679
00:36:30,920 --> 00:36:33,239
Speaker 1: she's like, no, I'm your girlfriend that I'm telling you.

680
00:36:34,800 --> 00:36:40,680
Speaker 1: Oh am, Embarras says, this woman deserves way better. M boy,

681
00:36:41,680 --> 00:36:44,919
Speaker 1: oh boy. She said that it happens even in black

682
00:36:44,920 --> 00:36:50,520
Speaker 1: communities that people with darker skin are treated badly colorism. Eh,

683
00:36:50,560 --> 00:36:53,799
Speaker 1: and that because she's biologically and only child, all her

684
00:36:53,840 --> 00:36:57,080
Speaker 1: siblings are lighter and it was a point of bullying

685
00:36:57,160 --> 00:37:00,799
Speaker 1: for her. I said, well, I'm not so I'm not

686
00:37:00,880 --> 00:37:03,000
Speaker 1: shaming you, dude.

687
00:37:03,239 --> 00:37:06,000
Speaker 2: Great response response.

688
00:37:07,200 --> 00:37:13,080
Speaker 1: What he's like, There's no way historically, I, as a

689
00:37:13,120 --> 00:37:19,960
Speaker 1: white person, could ever say anything racist to you. Oh boy,

690
00:37:20,480 --> 00:37:24,799
Speaker 1: Oh my god, Kimberly Finess, stop defending yourself and use

691
00:37:24,840 --> 00:37:28,520
Speaker 1: your ear holes instead of talking out of your a hole.

692
00:37:29,840 --> 00:37:31,200
Speaker 2: Wow, brilliant, brilliant.

693
00:37:31,560 --> 00:37:33,719
Speaker 1: You need to write for this guy. You to write

694
00:37:33,760 --> 00:37:38,880
Speaker 1: all of his responses. Oh my god. Which my brain

695
00:37:39,800 --> 00:37:44,279
Speaker 1: did the stupid sentence salad after he said that, and

696
00:37:44,360 --> 00:37:47,120
Speaker 1: I knew I sounded stupid, but she just went quiet,

697
00:37:47,200 --> 00:37:52,800
Speaker 1: You don't just sound stupid, you sound racist, and didn't

698
00:37:53,040 --> 00:37:55,479
Speaker 1: really say much after that and didn't want to stay

699
00:37:55,480 --> 00:37:59,240
Speaker 1: over after. I wonder why she was a bit distant

700
00:37:59,600 --> 00:38:01,920
Speaker 1: distant for a day, and then texted the other night

701
00:38:01,960 --> 00:38:06,040
Speaker 1: that we need to talk. Essentially yeah, I don't have

702
00:38:06,120 --> 00:38:10,319
Speaker 1: high hopes for this relationship. But like the other the

703
00:38:10,360 --> 00:38:12,799
Speaker 1: girl and the other story, she could come back from

704
00:38:12,840 --> 00:38:14,000
Speaker 1: that easily. I don't.

705
00:38:14,719 --> 00:38:15,000
Speaker 2: I don't.

706
00:38:15,040 --> 00:38:17,759
Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't know how you come back

707
00:38:17,800 --> 00:38:20,440
Speaker 1: from this. Maybe he does. I don't know how a

708
00:38:20,520 --> 00:38:24,040
Speaker 1: miracle would have to He like realizes that he has

709
00:38:24,160 --> 00:38:29,640
Speaker 1: internalized all like this racist stuff, and he's like, actually,

710
00:38:29,760 --> 00:38:33,160
Speaker 1: I've done some self searching, soul searching, and I went

711
00:38:33,200 --> 00:38:35,960
Speaker 1: to these courses and I read all these books. Now

712
00:38:36,080 --> 00:38:36,640
Speaker 1: I'm ready.

713
00:38:39,200 --> 00:38:42,239
Speaker 2: That's what you have to do to bring this back.

714
00:38:42,560 --> 00:38:47,160
Speaker 1: He's like, I'm so sorry. Here do you go. She

715
00:38:47,360 --> 00:38:49,440
Speaker 1: was a bit distant for a day and then texted

716
00:38:49,480 --> 00:38:51,839
Speaker 1: the other night that we needed to talk. Essentially, I

717
00:38:51,880 --> 00:38:55,120
Speaker 1: assumed it's about this, but it feels so blown up

718
00:38:55,160 --> 00:38:58,200
Speaker 1: by now. Am I the a hole for this? Let's

719
00:38:58,200 --> 00:39:02,200
Speaker 1: get these call up, Let's go pull up the tear

720
00:39:02,280 --> 00:39:05,560
Speaker 1: him right the chair them. But Bart, actually I don't.

721
00:39:05,600 --> 00:39:07,560
Speaker 1: I don't want the ahole, not the a whole poll.

722
00:39:07,640 --> 00:39:10,560
Speaker 1: I want do you think they'll stay together.

723
00:39:12,080 --> 00:39:14,400
Speaker 2: Or not? Whether or not?

724
00:39:14,600 --> 00:39:17,200
Speaker 1: No, but not whether or not they should. Do you

725
00:39:17,280 --> 00:39:20,680
Speaker 1: think they will? That's what I want to know, because

726
00:39:20,680 --> 00:39:24,919
Speaker 1: we don't know yet. We I think she should leave him,

727
00:39:25,480 --> 00:39:28,080
Speaker 1: but does she that's the question. You're going to use

728
00:39:28,120 --> 00:39:33,360
Speaker 1: your powers of deduction, powers of guessing, and we're going

729
00:39:33,440 --> 00:39:37,719
Speaker 1: to figure out what goes on. Miss A says, you

730
00:39:37,800 --> 00:39:40,759
Speaker 1: can not undo such things. I don't even believe he

731
00:39:40,880 --> 00:39:43,960
Speaker 1: even realizes what he's doing. That's the problem. I think

732
00:39:44,000 --> 00:39:46,800
Speaker 1: even if you don't realize what you're saying is wrong,

733
00:39:47,800 --> 00:39:50,239
Speaker 1: that is also an issue because you need to go and,

734
00:39:50,320 --> 00:39:55,360
Speaker 1: like Edge, actively educate yourself, especially when your partner is

735
00:39:55,400 --> 00:39:57,680
Speaker 1: a person of color. It's not on them to teach you.

736
00:39:58,200 --> 00:40:00,840
Speaker 1: It's on you when you enter that relationship. Well, you

737
00:40:00,880 --> 00:40:03,000
Speaker 1: should be doing it before, but especially when you enter

738
00:40:03,040 --> 00:40:04,359
Speaker 1: a relationship.

739
00:40:03,840 --> 00:40:07,920
Speaker 2: Where you said educate Edge. That was funny.

740
00:40:08,560 --> 00:40:14,960
Speaker 1: What Oh my god. No, I'm like I'm talking. I'm like, oh,

741
00:40:14,960 --> 00:40:20,160
Speaker 1: they you should really communicate And he's like cool, Oh,

742
00:40:20,280 --> 00:40:23,319
Speaker 1: let's get into this update though. Where where we are

743
00:40:23,320 --> 00:40:27,479
Speaker 1: on this poll? Oh? Actually I can see it. Wait,

744
00:40:27,560 --> 00:40:31,080
Speaker 1: stay together or not? The a hole? No?

745
00:40:31,320 --> 00:40:31,799
Speaker 2: Stay together?

746
00:40:31,920 --> 00:40:36,320
Speaker 1: Oh no? What? Okay? Yeah? So third ninety four percent

747
00:40:36,320 --> 00:40:40,160
Speaker 1: of you are saying they were they will not play together. Update.

748
00:40:41,040 --> 00:40:43,280
Speaker 1: I have called her and spoke with her and thanks

749
00:40:43,320 --> 00:40:46,480
Speaker 1: to the three actually civil commenters and two messages who

750
00:40:46,560 --> 00:40:50,280
Speaker 1: shared some mature insights. I was able to see where

751
00:40:50,360 --> 00:40:55,440
Speaker 1: I went wrong. Okay, okay, we'll see if that's true.

752
00:40:55,640 --> 00:40:57,440
Speaker 1: I am on my way to speak with her in

753
00:40:57,520 --> 00:41:01,760
Speaker 1: person to apologize properly. I have already picked up flowers

754
00:41:01,760 --> 00:41:05,520
Speaker 1: and wrote an apology, also in a card fingers crossed.

755
00:41:06,080 --> 00:41:08,200
Speaker 1: As I've said many times, I love her so much,

756
00:41:08,280 --> 00:41:11,319
Speaker 1: but I am human and screw up, so hopefully apologizing

757
00:41:11,400 --> 00:41:14,200
Speaker 1: and owning my mistake will be enough. I know I

758
00:41:14,239 --> 00:41:16,520
Speaker 1: don't deserve her, She's far out of my league in

759
00:41:16,640 --> 00:41:19,799
Speaker 1: every level, but I will work hard to try. It's

760
00:41:19,920 --> 00:41:22,400
Speaker 1: very disheartening to find so many people on here that

761
00:41:22,440 --> 00:41:25,400
Speaker 1: are so quick to throw insults in weighted terms and

762
00:41:25,440 --> 00:41:28,560
Speaker 1: wish for calamity upon another human being. I wish you

763
00:41:28,560 --> 00:41:30,879
Speaker 1: all peace someday, and I suggest you replace the hate

764
00:41:30,920 --> 00:41:34,040
Speaker 1: in your hearts with empathy, patience, and love. I will

765
00:41:34,120 --> 00:41:37,240
Speaker 1: update soon as despite the trolls, some genuinely good people

766
00:41:37,280 --> 00:41:39,799
Speaker 1: have reached out, and I am grateful you saved me

767
00:41:39,960 --> 00:41:43,000
Speaker 1: from making an even worse mistake and for sure losing

768
00:41:43,040 --> 00:41:47,640
Speaker 1: someone I hold dear. And there are some comments and

769
00:41:47,680 --> 00:41:48,200
Speaker 1: an update.

770
00:41:48,320 --> 00:41:49,040
Speaker 2: Sorry for being.

771
00:41:50,800 --> 00:41:53,200
Speaker 1: He comes with flowers. He's like, so sorry, I was

772
00:41:53,239 --> 00:41:56,960
Speaker 1: a little bit racist today, and she's like, have we

773
00:41:57,000 --> 00:42:00,239
Speaker 1: done any have we done any learning educating yourself? And

774
00:42:00,360 --> 00:42:03,600
Speaker 1: he's like, well, I brought you flowers, so that actually

775
00:42:03,640 --> 00:42:08,600
Speaker 1: solves uh hundreds of years of oppression in racism, right

776
00:42:12,160 --> 00:42:16,000
Speaker 1: man nah man Oh Kimberly find says this will fit

777
00:42:16,080 --> 00:42:20,560
Speaker 1: in her trash can nicely funny, and Shay Rising says

778
00:42:20,600 --> 00:42:22,920
Speaker 1: it sucks because I've had people do the same to

779
00:42:22,960 --> 00:42:25,359
Speaker 1: me and lighten my photos. I hate it. I felt

780
00:42:25,360 --> 00:42:28,400
Speaker 1: like I was always discolored and made me feel gross.

781
00:42:28,440 --> 00:42:35,840
Speaker 1: Not cool to these comments. Just the way you are

782
00:42:37,160 --> 00:42:43,040
Speaker 1: wise words by Riley comments five star told Splash says,

783
00:42:43,520 --> 00:42:45,279
Speaker 1: I think you're being an a hole, but you don't

784
00:42:45,280 --> 00:42:48,520
Speaker 1: even realize it. You're saying that she's never looked more

785
00:42:48,560 --> 00:42:51,440
Speaker 1: beautiful in a photograph where you changed her skin color

786
00:42:51,880 --> 00:42:53,440
Speaker 1: is massively insulting.

787
00:42:53,560 --> 00:42:55,680
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, yeah.

788
00:42:56,320 --> 00:42:59,760
Speaker 1: As Carl Scarlatia says, why the hell are you changing

789
00:42:59,800 --> 00:43:02,360
Speaker 1: your skin color? Opie says, I edited the photo and

790
00:43:02,440 --> 00:43:04,399
Speaker 1: touched it up, like a billion people edit and touch

791
00:43:04,440 --> 00:43:08,520
Speaker 1: photos all over the world. A little aggressive. I thought

792
00:43:08,560 --> 00:43:11,160
Speaker 1: we were learning. I thought we had you know, taken

793
00:43:11,200 --> 00:43:14,760
Speaker 1: away some stuff. It doesn't seem so from that comment,

794
00:43:17,320 --> 00:43:20,319
Speaker 1: I think we just need to move on and you know, learn.

795
00:43:22,640 --> 00:43:25,880
Speaker 1: Wintered In says people edit photos to make something slash

796
00:43:25,920 --> 00:43:28,759
Speaker 1: someone look better in their opinion. By making your skin

797
00:43:28,800 --> 00:43:31,319
Speaker 1: tone lighter, you are directly telling her, I think you'd

798
00:43:31,320 --> 00:43:33,799
Speaker 1: look better if your skin was lighter, And you even

799
00:43:33,920 --> 00:43:36,640
Speaker 1: confirmed this by telling her that you don't ob judge

800
00:43:36,680 --> 00:43:39,840
Speaker 1: over something you can't change, So you really think she'd

801
00:43:39,840 --> 00:43:43,479
Speaker 1: look better with lighter skin. That's what's insulting and makes

802
00:43:43,480 --> 00:43:45,319
Speaker 1: you sound not genuine at all when you say you

803
00:43:45,320 --> 00:43:48,319
Speaker 1: find her attractive. How you are not getting something so

804
00:43:48,640 --> 00:43:55,080
Speaker 1: incredibly obvious is beyond me. Opie says, I never said that.

805
00:43:55,320 --> 00:43:57,160
Speaker 1: I did say I liked the photo and that it's

806
00:43:57,280 --> 00:43:59,400
Speaker 1: likely one of my favorites of her, but it was

807
00:43:59,440 --> 00:44:02,760
Speaker 1: genuinely an innocent, you're so beautiful thing that was colored

808
00:44:02,760 --> 00:44:05,080
Speaker 1: with me being proud of sharpening my skills to produce

809
00:44:05,120 --> 00:44:07,560
Speaker 1: an image of her. I do very much tend to

810
00:44:07,640 --> 00:44:10,320
Speaker 1: lean on the side of not obsessing about unchangeable things,

811
00:44:10,320 --> 00:44:13,440
Speaker 1: but I never meant it to elude that unchanging things

812
00:44:13,480 --> 00:44:17,880
Speaker 1: are bad things. Just don't even bring up unchanging things

813
00:44:18,400 --> 00:44:19,799
Speaker 1: I do hear what you're saying in the way it

814
00:44:19,840 --> 00:44:22,800
Speaker 1: all sounded, and how realize and have realized how hurtful

815
00:44:22,800 --> 00:44:25,319
Speaker 1: that must have been coming from her boyfriend. So I

816
00:44:25,320 --> 00:44:28,279
Speaker 1: will apologize and try to do better.

817
00:44:30,560 --> 00:44:31,880
Speaker 2: Nice.

818
00:44:32,400 --> 00:44:34,719
Speaker 1: I want to see action because I'm getting a lot

819
00:44:34,760 --> 00:44:38,240
Speaker 1: of talk. Uh and we haven't really seen we haven't.

820
00:44:38,280 --> 00:44:41,640
Speaker 1: We've heard you go to get flowers. Yeah, jac says

821
00:44:41,680 --> 00:44:46,359
Speaker 1: he literally did say that. Yeah, I'm not seeing the

822
00:44:46,400 --> 00:44:51,720
Speaker 1: actionables quite yet. Yeah, Jace says he's not taking accountability.

823
00:44:53,000 --> 00:44:55,359
Speaker 1: We'll see. I still don't think that she should get

824
00:44:55,400 --> 00:44:57,399
Speaker 1: back together this way with this man, because he doesn't

825
00:44:57,440 --> 00:45:00,560
Speaker 1: seem like the person who will actually like I don't know,

826
00:45:00,560 --> 00:45:04,239
Speaker 1: he doesn't seem very supportive of her or wanting to

827
00:45:04,520 --> 00:45:09,319
Speaker 1: kind of don't. You can never you know, understand like

828
00:45:09,360 --> 00:45:11,640
Speaker 1: a person of color if you're white, a person's like

829
00:45:11,640 --> 00:45:13,520
Speaker 1: a person of colors experience in the world, but you

830
00:45:13,520 --> 00:45:16,040
Speaker 1: can try and educate yourself about it. And I don't

831
00:45:16,040 --> 00:45:20,560
Speaker 1: think he's taken that step at all. So from what

832
00:45:20,600 --> 00:45:26,120
Speaker 1: we see, object Excuse eighty one oh five says, so,

833
00:45:26,440 --> 00:45:29,520
Speaker 1: as a fellow photographer and wife in an interracial marriage,

834
00:45:29,560 --> 00:45:32,000
Speaker 1: I will say you have to be very mindful here.

835
00:45:32,440 --> 00:45:35,480
Speaker 1: The only time I actually lighten my husband or kids

836
00:45:35,520 --> 00:45:38,080
Speaker 1: in any photo is when the lighting is too dark

837
00:45:38,120 --> 00:45:40,759
Speaker 1: to clearly make out their facial features, and I do

838
00:45:40,800 --> 00:45:44,120
Speaker 1: that very carefully. I am very pale in complexion, so

839
00:45:44,160 --> 00:45:46,080
Speaker 1: photos with all of us have a wide range of

840
00:45:46,080 --> 00:45:49,120
Speaker 1: complexions to manage. It can be a challenge to balance

841
00:45:49,160 --> 00:45:51,920
Speaker 1: the lighting between us so that everyone is equally visible

842
00:45:51,960 --> 00:45:55,880
Speaker 1: and complexion tones are true. I have unintentionally lightened my

843
00:45:55,960 --> 00:45:58,600
Speaker 1: daughter too much when the photo itself is a bit money,

844
00:45:58,800 --> 00:46:00,319
Speaker 1: and then I have to go back and you do

845
00:46:00,400 --> 00:46:03,279
Speaker 1: it because I'll realize I went too far. I've done

846
00:46:03,360 --> 00:46:05,680
Speaker 1: more weddings of people of color than I have Caucasian

847
00:46:06,080 --> 00:46:08,800
Speaker 1: and put a lot of effort to not unintentionally whitewash

848
00:46:08,840 --> 00:46:11,799
Speaker 1: the skin tone. It's obvious she does not want her

849
00:46:11,800 --> 00:46:15,520
Speaker 1: skin lighten in photos, so your primary goal should always

850
00:46:15,560 --> 00:46:20,240
Speaker 1: be focused on keeping her skin tone true. My daughters

851
00:46:20,280 --> 00:46:24,400
Speaker 1: care a lot about having their skin tone accurately accurately represented.

852
00:46:24,920 --> 00:46:27,400
Speaker 1: The presets I tend to use vastly change the overall

853
00:46:27,400 --> 00:46:30,040
Speaker 1: tone of images, but work well on brown skin. But

854
00:46:30,120 --> 00:46:32,560
Speaker 1: I still go through them very carefully and make sure

855
00:46:32,560 --> 00:46:36,840
Speaker 1: that I have not adjusted anything that misrepresents the shade

856
00:46:36,840 --> 00:46:39,719
Speaker 1: of their skin. I also use my daughters as a

857
00:46:39,760 --> 00:46:41,719
Speaker 1: second set of eyes when i'm editing to make sure

858
00:46:41,719 --> 00:46:44,799
Speaker 1: I've accurately edited the skin tones, since it's easy to

859
00:46:44,840 --> 00:46:47,839
Speaker 1: kind of tip over into over editing. That's also what

860
00:46:47,880 --> 00:46:49,680
Speaker 1: he could have been doing. He could have asked her,

861
00:46:50,280 --> 00:46:53,279
Speaker 1: you know, hey, is this okay with you? Before I

862
00:46:53,360 --> 00:46:58,239
Speaker 1: post it? Yeah, it sounds like the way she sees

863
00:46:58,239 --> 00:47:01,920
Speaker 1: your edits is that you are persistently lightening her complexion

864
00:47:02,040 --> 00:47:05,520
Speaker 1: into her It's doing exactly what society has always done,

865
00:47:05,640 --> 00:47:09,239
Speaker 1: equates lighter with better, So you need to reevaluate your

866
00:47:09,280 --> 00:47:11,880
Speaker 1: perception here. The statement that you made regarding your favorite

867
00:47:11,920 --> 00:47:14,920
Speaker 1: photo of her, ever, is particularly harsh if it's a

868
00:47:15,000 --> 00:47:19,160
Speaker 1: lightened version of her complexion. Apologize to her, and maybe

869
00:47:19,200 --> 00:47:20,960
Speaker 1: it would be a good idea to sit down and

870
00:47:21,000 --> 00:47:22,920
Speaker 1: go through an edit with her and make note of

871
00:47:22,960 --> 00:47:26,000
Speaker 1: how to edit photos in a way that doesn't misrepresent

872
00:47:26,040 --> 00:47:28,920
Speaker 1: her skin tone and that she feels is an honest

873
00:47:29,000 --> 00:47:34,279
Speaker 1: and beautiful portrayal of her. What a great comment, What

874
00:47:34,440 --> 00:47:38,040
Speaker 1: a great comment. Yeah, Arden's obvious is great common person.

875
00:47:38,560 --> 00:47:42,640
Speaker 1: I really appreciate because I think that op is so

876
00:47:43,200 --> 00:47:48,440
Speaker 1: far in the a hole zone. All right, I think

877
00:47:48,480 --> 00:47:50,319
Speaker 1: Op's so far in the a hole zone. But I

878
00:47:50,400 --> 00:47:52,920
Speaker 1: really appreciate that this comment or took the time to

879
00:47:54,760 --> 00:47:59,520
Speaker 1: like kindly say, this is where you went wrong, this

880
00:47:59,560 --> 00:48:02,440
Speaker 1: is how you can apologize, and this is what you

881
00:48:02,480 --> 00:48:05,440
Speaker 1: can do better. I think those are great comments to see.

882
00:48:05,680 --> 00:48:10,719
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah it uh. I I don't know.

883
00:48:10,880 --> 00:48:12,520
Speaker 2: I just hope he learns from all those.

884
00:48:12,719 --> 00:48:15,400
Speaker 1: Yeah. I think even if she breaks up with him,

885
00:48:15,440 --> 00:48:18,080
Speaker 1: I think I hope that he still comes away from

886
00:48:18,160 --> 00:48:21,560
Speaker 1: it with a new perspective and is realizing that he

887
00:48:21,640 --> 00:48:23,560
Speaker 1: wasn't the wrong. That's what I want. I want him

888
00:48:24,160 --> 00:48:26,440
Speaker 1: by the end of this, weather they're together or not,

889
00:48:26,560 --> 00:48:29,440
Speaker 1: I want him to realize that he made mistakes and

890
00:48:30,040 --> 00:48:32,040
Speaker 1: actively try to change his mindset.

891
00:48:32,120 --> 00:48:32,400
Speaker 2: Fact.

892
00:48:32,520 --> 00:48:34,600
Speaker 1: That's what I want. Thank you everyone who's saying bless you.

893
00:48:35,120 --> 00:48:38,040
Speaker 1: Opie responds thank you that I actually makes sense. I

894
00:48:38,080 --> 00:48:39,960
Speaker 1: am on my way to speak with her soon, so

895
00:48:40,000 --> 00:48:43,439
Speaker 1: this helps me better understand and articulate what I need.

896
00:48:43,840 --> 00:48:46,320
Speaker 1: I love her, but I am human and screw up sometimes,

897
00:48:46,320 --> 00:48:49,000
Speaker 1: and I want to understand more. But this does make

898
00:48:49,200 --> 00:48:51,040
Speaker 1: But this does make more sense to me than the

899
00:48:51,120 --> 00:48:54,160
Speaker 1: random insults I've been reading and there is an update.

900
00:48:56,600 --> 00:49:01,600
Speaker 1: I don't I don't know. But before we get into

901
00:49:01,640 --> 00:49:07,920
Speaker 1: the update, welcome all ye new people and they came

902
00:49:07,920 --> 00:49:12,719
Speaker 1: to three hundred and eight people liked the stream. You

903
00:49:12,840 --> 00:49:18,080
Speaker 1: are now part of my exclusive favorites. You have everyone else.

904
00:49:18,120 --> 00:49:19,799
Speaker 1: You have an hour and eleven minutes to get in

905
00:49:19,840 --> 00:49:23,920
Speaker 1: there or it's gone. It's a yeah, it's a very

906
00:49:24,239 --> 00:49:32,280
Speaker 1: exclusive club, but gld R for any newcomers. Op lightened

907
00:49:32,320 --> 00:49:36,080
Speaker 1: a photo of his black girlfriend and she was very

908
00:49:36,160 --> 00:49:39,840
Speaker 1: upset by this, and so now he's kind of getting

909
00:49:39,880 --> 00:49:41,920
Speaker 1: a lot of flack on Reddit and realizing that he

910
00:49:42,080 --> 00:49:46,439
Speaker 1: was in fact crazy in the wrong. But let's get

911
00:49:46,440 --> 00:49:50,560
Speaker 1: into this update. Also, I have an okay story time

912
00:49:51,080 --> 00:49:53,000
Speaker 1: that I just thought about when I did that, and

913
00:49:53,040 --> 00:49:54,680
Speaker 1: I want to tell it. It has nothing to do

914
00:49:54,719 --> 00:49:57,440
Speaker 1: with the story, but I want to tell it and

915
00:49:57,440 --> 00:50:02,879
Speaker 1: I'll tell her later. Wait, Okay, before I get into

916
00:50:02,880 --> 00:50:05,680
Speaker 1: the update, I would to do the donations a Peter Shatty,

917
00:50:05,760 --> 00:50:08,680
Speaker 1: thank you for celebrating one month of membership. Never thought

918
00:50:08,680 --> 00:50:11,480
Speaker 1: I'd be able to catch a live live you know

919
00:50:12,440 --> 00:50:15,799
Speaker 1: it's one am in India, whoa jeez. Sending lots of

920
00:50:15,840 --> 00:50:19,360
Speaker 1: love to her worm Queen and Big Protein We appreciate

921
00:50:19,400 --> 00:50:21,360
Speaker 1: you and thank you for coming at one am. I

922
00:50:21,400 --> 00:50:24,239
Speaker 1: hope you get some sleep soon and go to bed.

923
00:50:25,719 --> 00:50:28,080
Speaker 1: Matt hatter Gill, thank you for the five bucks. Her

924
00:50:28,200 --> 00:50:30,960
Speaker 1: response to my best friend, Oh, this is when someone

925
00:50:31,080 --> 00:50:35,480
Speaker 1: edited your freckles. Well, I took away her freckles to

926
00:50:35,560 --> 00:50:39,799
Speaker 1: make her less ugly than she already is. What's the

927
00:50:39,840 --> 00:50:46,359
Speaker 1: big deal? Oh boy, but I'm beating this person up.

928
00:50:47,040 --> 00:50:51,160
Speaker 1: I'm beating her up. She's the worst. Well, maybe you

929
00:50:51,200 --> 00:50:55,520
Speaker 1: should edit yourself because you're ugly, your soul's ugly because

930
00:50:55,719 --> 00:51:01,040
Speaker 1: this girl sucks. She's the worst. Yi. I'm so sorry

931
00:51:01,160 --> 00:51:03,480
Speaker 1: that anyone ever said that to you and that they

932
00:51:03,520 --> 00:51:08,520
Speaker 1: they were awful. But let's get into this update. Oh

933
00:51:08,560 --> 00:51:12,120
Speaker 1: we got another what Ashley Lee, thank you for the

934
00:51:12,120 --> 00:51:17,720
Speaker 1: one thirty nine. Appreciate it all right, ohp says hey guys,

935
00:51:17,920 --> 00:51:20,480
Speaker 1: to some of you, to some of your joy and

936
00:51:20,560 --> 00:51:23,799
Speaker 1: other Sismay, my girlfriend did not break up with me,

937
00:51:24,120 --> 00:51:25,279
Speaker 1: nor me with her.

938
00:51:25,920 --> 00:51:29,760
Speaker 2: WHOA, that's but that's crazy, bodests.

939
00:51:30,600 --> 00:51:32,960
Speaker 1: Wow, okay, okay.

940
00:51:32,600 --> 00:51:39,880
Speaker 2: What did you do? What miracle happened? I am in shock?

941
00:51:40,360 --> 00:51:45,520
Speaker 1: This is wow, this is crazy. But let's let's find

942
00:51:45,560 --> 00:51:51,040
Speaker 1: out how he got out of this, I invite. I

943
00:51:51,080 --> 00:51:54,680
Speaker 1: invited her out to her absolute favorite restaurant, got dressed up,

944
00:51:54,920 --> 00:51:58,240
Speaker 1: had flowers, and wrote an apology in a card. Said

945
00:51:58,320 --> 00:52:01,400
Speaker 1: card said in the front, I mean people suck, and

946
00:52:01,480 --> 00:52:04,000
Speaker 1: on the inside it said I'm sorry, where I wrote

947
00:52:04,160 --> 00:52:06,400
Speaker 1: about how I completely left up and I hurt the

948
00:52:06,440 --> 00:52:10,400
Speaker 1: woman I adore and admire, and I was so incredibly sorry.

949
00:52:11,239 --> 00:52:14,280
Speaker 1: I apologized in person too, of course, and at first

950
00:52:14,280 --> 00:52:17,279
Speaker 1: she had no expression. You just listened to me, and

951
00:52:17,360 --> 00:52:20,200
Speaker 1: I was getting nervous, so I started rambling and stuttering

952
00:52:20,239 --> 00:52:23,120
Speaker 1: and sounding like an idiot. But she leaned forward and

953
00:52:23,160 --> 00:52:25,920
Speaker 1: touched my knee and told me she appreciated me taking

954
00:52:25,960 --> 00:52:29,440
Speaker 1: time to apologize like this, and she had already forgiven

955
00:52:29,480 --> 00:52:32,080
Speaker 1: me and asked if she can talk about it to me, which,

956
00:52:32,120 --> 00:52:36,160
Speaker 1: of course I said, yes, Okay, you know this is good.

957
00:52:36,160 --> 00:52:39,000
Speaker 1: They're gonna have an honest conversation about, you know, why

958
00:52:39,040 --> 00:52:45,040
Speaker 1: this upset her and how you can move forward. She

959
00:52:45,160 --> 00:52:48,640
Speaker 1: explained further that it took her years to love her skin,

960
00:52:48,920 --> 00:52:52,240
Speaker 1: and how she was bullied by strangers, friends, and family

961
00:52:52,280 --> 00:52:56,040
Speaker 1: alike for her dark skin. Oh you said the black

962
00:52:56,040 --> 00:52:58,360
Speaker 1: Panther movies meant so much to her in part of

963
00:52:58,400 --> 00:53:01,680
Speaker 1: how diverse, in part because of how diverse the skin tones, hair,

964
00:53:01,719 --> 00:53:04,800
Speaker 1: and builds of black people were represented, and she loved

965
00:53:04,800 --> 00:53:08,040
Speaker 1: the race that a dark skinned black woman was prominently

966
00:53:08,080 --> 00:53:11,239
Speaker 1: on a poster for it. She told me that she

967
00:53:11,320 --> 00:53:14,600
Speaker 1: foresaw hurdles as we are an interracial couple, but me

968
00:53:14,800 --> 00:53:18,000
Speaker 1: calling the photo my favorite made her feel that I

969
00:53:18,080 --> 00:53:22,680
Speaker 1: secretly wished she were lighter, and it reignited a deep insecurity.

970
00:53:22,840 --> 00:53:23,280
Speaker 2: Oof.

971
00:53:23,840 --> 00:53:26,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, how could it not the way that

972
00:53:26,719 --> 00:53:27,480
Speaker 1: he worded it?

973
00:53:27,560 --> 00:53:30,759
Speaker 2: Wow, Sorry, real quick, this is a little queen right here,

974
00:53:30,800 --> 00:53:32,480
Speaker 2: just like taking her time out of her day to

975
00:53:32,560 --> 00:53:33,160
Speaker 2: like explain.

976
00:53:33,200 --> 00:53:35,440
Speaker 1: But she doesn't owe him, like this is not she

977
00:53:35,480 --> 00:53:39,080
Speaker 1: does not owe him this education. But you know, he

978
00:53:39,120 --> 00:53:44,080
Speaker 1: should really really appreciate that she's one forgiving him and

979
00:53:44,160 --> 00:53:46,919
Speaker 1: also taking the time to explain it to him when

980
00:53:46,920 --> 00:53:50,239
Speaker 1: she does not need to. A kitty B says, And

981
00:53:50,280 --> 00:53:52,520
Speaker 1: when it comes to POC, it's not just bullying, it

982
00:53:52,560 --> 00:53:55,799
Speaker 1: could be life threatening racism absolutely. I mean, you know,

983
00:53:55,960 --> 00:54:00,359
Speaker 1: people of color experience scenarios all the time where they

984
00:54:00,400 --> 00:54:05,080
Speaker 1: are worried about their lives just walk. You know, we

985
00:54:05,120 --> 00:54:06,600
Speaker 1: see this all the time, and so you have to

986
00:54:06,640 --> 00:54:09,000
Speaker 1: be so careful about how you talk about these issues

987
00:54:09,360 --> 00:54:14,120
Speaker 1: if you are a person, like a white person. I

988
00:54:14,160 --> 00:54:17,480
Speaker 1: apologized and reiterated that she is the most beautiful, striking

989
00:54:17,480 --> 00:54:19,719
Speaker 1: woman I have ever seen, and that I feel she

990
00:54:19,880 --> 00:54:22,359
Speaker 1: is out of my effing league a million times over.

991
00:54:22,920 --> 00:54:25,200
Speaker 1: But I did not show or appreciate that. When I

992
00:54:25,239 --> 00:54:28,520
Speaker 1: got defensive, I conceded that it was not her job

993
00:54:28,600 --> 00:54:33,480
Speaker 1: to educate me on racism or microaggressions. Okay, let's start here.

994
00:54:34,080 --> 00:54:36,640
Speaker 1: But she said, while she agrees, she prefers me to

995
00:54:36,719 --> 00:54:40,040
Speaker 1: just talk to her, ask questions and accept feedback.

996
00:54:41,239 --> 00:54:43,440
Speaker 2: Okay, Okay, I agreed.

997
00:54:43,080 --> 00:54:45,399
Speaker 1: So long as I didn't overburden her with it, as

998
00:54:45,440 --> 00:54:48,960
Speaker 1: I intend to intend to resume my previously paused therapy

999
00:54:49,040 --> 00:54:54,400
Speaker 1: and start getting more education. Do okay, Okay, this is

1000
00:54:55,760 --> 00:54:58,960
Speaker 1: going in a good direction. It started off so poorly

1001
00:54:59,000 --> 00:55:02,560
Speaker 1: for him, going in a great direction.

1002
00:55:02,800 --> 00:55:06,480
Speaker 2: Wow, Okay, Wow, okay, Okay.

1003
00:55:08,840 --> 00:55:12,000
Speaker 1: She's actually really interested in my photography and wants to

1004
00:55:12,080 --> 00:55:15,080
Speaker 1: learn how to edit for fun and also to potentially

1005
00:55:15,120 --> 00:55:17,759
Speaker 1: help me out for when she says I blow up

1006
00:55:17,800 --> 00:55:21,239
Speaker 1: and get too many clients to handle. Sweet, I am

1007
00:55:21,320 --> 00:55:23,560
Speaker 1: falling in love with her all over again. I know,

1008
00:55:23,640 --> 00:55:26,680
Speaker 1: I don't deserve her love or patience. But I but

1009
00:55:26,920 --> 00:55:28,440
Speaker 1: am I a lucky bastard.

1010
00:55:28,440 --> 00:55:30,120
Speaker 2: Indeed, I ended.

1011
00:55:30,000 --> 00:55:32,239
Speaker 1: Up showing her my first post and she laughed at

1012
00:55:32,239 --> 00:55:35,040
Speaker 1: me for being clueless, but helped me feel better after

1013
00:55:35,080 --> 00:55:38,160
Speaker 1: some of the bushings I received. She's a really sweet

1014
00:55:38,160 --> 00:55:40,000
Speaker 1: person and I love her so much. It was a

1015
00:55:40,000 --> 00:55:43,040
Speaker 1: brief chat only because she volunteers on Saturdays, but she

1016
00:55:43,080 --> 00:55:45,680
Speaker 1: accepted my invite for me to spoil her tonight by

1017
00:55:45,680 --> 00:55:48,080
Speaker 1: taking her to her favorite hot pot place and buying

1018
00:55:48,120 --> 00:55:52,440
Speaker 1: her whatever she wants as a feeble attempt to partly

1019
00:55:52,520 --> 00:55:52,959
Speaker 1: men things.

1020
00:55:53,000 --> 00:55:55,000
Speaker 2: I love that. He was like, she can only chat

1021
00:55:55,040 --> 00:55:58,440
Speaker 2: for a little bit because she like volunteers on saturdays.

1022
00:55:59,520 --> 00:56:03,200
Speaker 2: Like you, how great of a person she? Dude, if

1023
00:56:03,200 --> 00:56:06,000
Speaker 2: you don't, why for like fix your racism and then

1024
00:56:06,040 --> 00:56:08,960
Speaker 2: why her up? Dude you that'll be the biggest l ever.

1025
00:56:09,200 --> 00:56:11,239
Speaker 1: Yeah, A marcout of family says, I don't know. She's

1026
00:56:11,239 --> 00:56:13,759
Speaker 1: a saint in my opinion, but this is weird colorism.

1027
00:56:14,040 --> 00:56:18,719
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, Like he's definitely got a lot of issues.

1028
00:56:20,080 --> 00:56:24,040
Speaker 1: But I will say I I do appreciate that he finally,

1029
00:56:24,239 --> 00:56:25,799
Speaker 1: it took way too long, and I don't think that

1030
00:56:25,840 --> 00:56:29,759
Speaker 1: she deserve that the like the time that it took.

1031
00:56:31,200 --> 00:56:34,360
Speaker 1: But I think in general, I am always happy to

1032
00:56:34,480 --> 00:56:40,200
Speaker 1: see when people actively take, you know, time to educate themselves.

1033
00:56:40,200 --> 00:56:42,080
Speaker 1: I think that is always a good thing, even if

1034
00:56:42,120 --> 00:56:45,840
Speaker 1: they've made horrible decisions of the bast I think whenever

1035
00:56:45,960 --> 00:56:48,120
Speaker 1: someone tries to improve themselves that is a good thing.

1036
00:56:49,400 --> 00:56:52,640
Speaker 1: But he's still obviously the avil in the story. I

1037
00:56:52,760 --> 00:56:55,919
Speaker 1: told her any time she feels othered or is hurt

1038
00:56:55,920 --> 00:56:58,759
Speaker 1: because of the complexity of our backwards world still not

1039
00:56:58,800 --> 00:57:02,080
Speaker 1: treating humans like humans, to please consider talking to me

1040
00:57:02,160 --> 00:57:04,879
Speaker 1: about it. Well, she doesn't have to. I wanted her

1041
00:57:04,920 --> 00:57:07,239
Speaker 1: to know she always can and I will always be

1042
00:57:07,320 --> 00:57:10,360
Speaker 1: there to listen. We plan to take an editing class together,

1043
00:57:10,560 --> 00:57:13,120
Speaker 1: this time by a photographer of color, and I cannot wait.

1044
00:57:14,320 --> 00:57:21,120
Speaker 1: Great actionables, Great actionables Stella Davis's. I think she's dealt

1045
00:57:21,160 --> 00:57:23,400
Speaker 1: with so much bullying for skin color that she's afraid

1046
00:57:23,440 --> 00:57:26,000
Speaker 1: she won't find someone better. That could be the case.

1047
00:57:26,960 --> 00:57:30,280
Speaker 1: I don't think we know from this story, but yeah,

1048
00:57:30,320 --> 00:57:35,040
Speaker 1: I think, yeah, I'm glad the Tomlin says, I'm glad

1049
00:57:35,040 --> 00:57:37,640
Speaker 1: this man recognizes the sainthood of this queen and she's

1050
00:57:37,680 --> 00:57:42,360
Speaker 1: willing to help him grow Yeah, thanks to all who

1051
00:57:42,440 --> 00:57:45,240
Speaker 1: have been kind and civil while gently helping me navigate

1052
00:57:45,240 --> 00:57:47,240
Speaker 1: to this place. I still have a lot of making

1053
00:57:47,320 --> 00:57:49,200
Speaker 1: up to do, but I feel like I am back

1054
00:57:49,320 --> 00:57:51,720
Speaker 1: on the right track. Nice and there is an edit

1055
00:57:51,960 --> 00:57:59,280
Speaker 1: and some comments to finish us off. Edit do you

1056
00:57:59,320 --> 00:58:02,840
Speaker 1: want do you have any finish this off? Okay? Edit?

1057
00:58:03,160 --> 00:58:05,400
Speaker 1: Since I've now gotten messages and comments from more than

1058
00:58:05,440 --> 00:58:08,360
Speaker 1: three people wishing me nothing but misery, I want to

1059
00:58:08,400 --> 00:58:11,040
Speaker 1: make this blanket edit. You're free to lash out at

1060
00:58:11,080 --> 00:58:14,640
Speaker 1: Internet's strangers. But I am so blessed and lucky because

1061
00:58:14,760 --> 00:58:17,760
Speaker 1: the one opinion I needed the most was my girlfriends

1062
00:58:18,160 --> 00:58:19,960
Speaker 1: and she just sent me a meme of those penguins

1063
00:58:20,000 --> 00:58:22,840
Speaker 1: hugging and says, and it said, I love you. I'm

1064
00:58:22,920 --> 00:58:25,400
Speaker 1: lucky as hell and halfier than I deserve. If that

1065
00:58:25,480 --> 00:58:28,200
Speaker 1: displeased you, I suggest doing something kind for yourself or

1066
00:58:28,240 --> 00:58:31,160
Speaker 1: someone you love today. Knowing your loved ones know of

1067
00:58:31,320 --> 00:58:33,200
Speaker 1: and feel your love is a hell of a drug.

1068
00:58:33,800 --> 00:58:35,560
Speaker 1: A little update also, because I've had to say it

1069
00:58:35,600 --> 00:58:37,760
Speaker 1: a few times in the conversation. Oh in the comments,

1070
00:58:38,160 --> 00:58:40,400
Speaker 1: my girlfriend and I had a really long and deep

1071
00:58:40,480 --> 00:58:43,800
Speaker 1: conversation and are feeling really good about things. I invited

1072
00:58:43,840 --> 00:58:45,920
Speaker 1: her over to watch Netflix and I have cooked dinner.

1073
00:58:46,400 --> 00:58:49,240
Speaker 1: She's being really sweet to this old a hole she's dating.

1074
00:58:49,680 --> 00:58:52,640
Speaker 1: I cannot express my relief, but I know I am

1075
00:58:52,680 --> 00:58:55,919
Speaker 1: in the midst of learning and unlearning things. Someone sent

1076
00:58:55,960 --> 00:58:57,840
Speaker 1: me a few books over Kindle to read and I

1077
00:58:57,880 --> 00:59:00,800
Speaker 1: want to say thank you. I'm already midway through one

1078
00:59:00,880 --> 00:59:04,040
Speaker 1: and it's been eye opening. Much love to all of you.

1079
00:59:04,600 --> 00:59:05,080
Speaker 1: Good night.

1080
00:59:07,120 --> 00:59:08,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, do we need to go through it.

1081
00:59:08,200 --> 00:59:11,720
Speaker 1: I don't think we The comments are super relevant, but yeah,

1082
00:59:11,920 --> 00:59:15,200
Speaker 1: that's you know, good ending, good ending, good ending. I

1083
00:59:15,280 --> 00:59:17,120
Speaker 1: really didn't see how he could come back from it,

1084
00:59:18,160 --> 00:59:21,800
Speaker 1: but yeah, Diana says, expecting to be coddled when your

1085
00:59:21,880 --> 00:59:26,120
Speaker 1: racist to your partner is wild. Absolutely completely agree. I

1086
00:59:26,120 --> 00:59:30,360
Speaker 1: don't think she owes him that at all, and I

1087
00:59:30,360 --> 00:59:32,200
Speaker 1: think he Yeah, I think he needed to work on

1088
00:59:32,280 --> 00:59:34,680
Speaker 1: that himself. But I am I am glad to see

1089
00:59:34,680 --> 00:59:38,680
Speaker 1: that that is happening, even though the way that it

1090
00:59:38,720 --> 00:59:42,360
Speaker 1: had to happen was bad. I'm glad that it like

1091
00:59:42,560 --> 00:59:49,080
Speaker 1: he's still going in that direction of educating himself. But

1092
00:59:49,120 --> 00:59:53,520
Speaker 1: that's it. That's the end of that story. But we

1093
00:59:53,600 --> 00:59:57,040
Speaker 1: have more stories to read, and if we get Oh,

1094
00:59:57,080 --> 01:00:01,200
Speaker 1: thank you Dominica Santierska for the two bucks or two euros.

1095
01:00:01,640 --> 01:00:06,320
Speaker 1: Let's see, and thank you to the three hundred and

1096
01:00:06,440 --> 01:00:09,760
Speaker 1: seventy one of you who've liked the stream. Come appreciate

1097
01:00:09,800 --> 01:00:15,919
Speaker 1: you and everyone else. I don't appreciate thank you for coming.

1098
01:00:15,960 --> 01:00:19,080
Speaker 1: We appreciate that you're here, and we would appreciate you

1099
01:00:19,120 --> 01:00:22,920
Speaker 1: even more if you like the stream. But let's get

1100
01:00:22,960 --> 01:00:27,200
Speaker 1: into this next story. Which story is it? And then

1101
01:00:27,240 --> 01:00:30,640
Speaker 1: I'll read I'll read the next while you said I

1102
01:00:31,040 --> 01:00:31,920
Speaker 1: for to stay.

1103
01:00:31,920 --> 01:00:36,400
Speaker 2: Well Sandra rivera, ooh, searing two months is a little protein.

1104
01:00:36,520 --> 01:00:39,720
Speaker 2: I'm worried if they get married and they have kids.

1105
01:00:40,000 --> 01:00:43,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, no, absolutely, And I think that that call

1106
01:00:43,520 --> 01:00:45,680
Speaker 1: one commoner who made the point of saying, like, I'm

1107
01:00:45,680 --> 01:00:49,080
Speaker 1: in an interracial marriage and I have kids who are

1108
01:00:49,160 --> 01:00:52,000
Speaker 1: darker skinned, and I have to be very like aware

1109
01:00:52,200 --> 01:00:55,680
Speaker 1: of how I photograph them and how we have those conversations.

1110
01:00:56,600 --> 01:01:01,080
Speaker 1: He definitely like before kids even come into like are

1111
01:01:01,160 --> 01:01:04,800
Speaker 1: even a thought in their minds, he needs to, you know,

1112
01:01:04,880 --> 01:01:09,280
Speaker 1: fix that mindset and himself. And Linda, thank you for

1113
01:01:09,320 --> 01:01:14,280
Speaker 1: celebrating three months of membership. My favorite subscription. That yeah,

1114
01:01:14,320 --> 01:01:19,040
Speaker 1: I've actually said that to all of your subscriptions. But

1115
01:01:19,720 --> 01:01:21,560
Speaker 1: let me before I get into the story, I want

1116
01:01:21,560 --> 01:01:24,520
Speaker 1: to tell you a quick okay ophe story time that

1117
01:01:24,600 --> 01:01:26,800
Speaker 1: has literally nothing to do with anything. We just tho,

1118
01:01:29,120 --> 01:01:30,240
Speaker 1: you don't even know what I'm gonna tell you.

1119
01:01:30,320 --> 01:01:31,920
Speaker 2: I know, but like you said.

1120
01:01:31,760 --> 01:01:33,479
Speaker 1: Oh, I just really have to talk about it because

1121
01:01:33,480 --> 01:01:35,640
Speaker 1: I think it's so crazy. Okay. So the other day

1122
01:01:35,840 --> 01:01:37,360
Speaker 1: I was in my room and there was a fly

1123
01:01:37,480 --> 01:01:40,400
Speaker 1: in my room and it was like it was buzzing

1124
01:01:40,480 --> 01:01:42,120
Speaker 1: round and I was like, that's annoying, and so I

1125
01:01:42,160 --> 01:01:44,680
Speaker 1: go over to the window to like shoot it out,

1126
01:01:45,280 --> 01:01:48,120
Speaker 1: and I like go to smack it, and it doesn't move,

1127
01:01:48,480 --> 01:01:50,600
Speaker 1: like it literally just sits there. And I felt that.

1128
01:01:50,800 --> 01:01:54,000
Speaker 1: I was like, I feel like I'm attacking an unarmed soldier.

1129
01:01:54,320 --> 01:01:56,040
Speaker 1: And so I like kind of like smack around it

1130
01:01:56,080 --> 01:01:57,680
Speaker 1: to try and get it to fly out of my room,

1131
01:01:57,720 --> 01:01:59,919
Speaker 1: and it doesn't move, and I'm like, am I gonna

1132
01:02:00,200 --> 01:02:02,600
Speaker 1: just is it just gonna let me kill it? And

1133
01:02:02,640 --> 01:02:04,480
Speaker 1: so I'm like trying to like push it. It's literally

1134
01:02:04,560 --> 01:02:06,400
Speaker 1: literally I'm like, so it's like right here, I'm like

1135
01:02:06,880 --> 01:02:10,800
Speaker 1: this and it's not moving, and I felt so bad

1136
01:02:10,960 --> 01:02:12,560
Speaker 1: that I was like, I'm gonna I have to take

1137
01:02:12,600 --> 01:02:14,120
Speaker 1: this fly out of my room. So I get like

1138
01:02:14,160 --> 01:02:16,720
Speaker 1: a little a little piece of paper and I the

1139
01:02:16,760 --> 01:02:20,640
Speaker 1: fly let me carry it all the way out of

1140
01:02:20,680 --> 01:02:24,360
Speaker 1: my room down the stairs outside. Stayed on my little

1141
01:02:24,440 --> 01:02:27,120
Speaker 1: like my little piece of paper for a couple minutes,

1142
01:02:27,720 --> 01:02:29,800
Speaker 1: like enough so that I could show John and Riley,

1143
01:02:29,880 --> 01:02:33,200
Speaker 1: and then it flew off. It was I was like, whoa,

1144
01:02:33,280 --> 01:02:41,240
Speaker 1: I just had a connection with with with nature. I did.

1145
01:02:41,480 --> 01:02:44,960
Speaker 1: I'm the snowway to flies, I'm the Lord of the flies.

1146
01:02:45,480 --> 01:02:47,920
Speaker 2: Yeah. While that was happening, a bee was doing the

1147
01:02:47,960 --> 01:02:49,880
Speaker 2: same thing. Yeah, like just chilling out on like a

1148
01:02:49,920 --> 01:02:52,240
Speaker 2: little table or whatever. And I was like trying to

1149
01:02:52,240 --> 01:02:53,760
Speaker 2: get him a leave. No, he's on like a cushion

1150
01:02:54,320 --> 01:02:55,320
Speaker 2: him leave and he wouldn't leave.

1151
01:02:55,520 --> 01:02:59,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, but like okay, I've seen bees do that, but

1152
01:02:59,600 --> 01:03:03,720
Speaker 1: I've ever seen a fly just sat. It was crazy.

1153
01:03:04,280 --> 01:03:06,080
Speaker 2: It was crazy.

1154
01:03:07,840 --> 01:03:11,920
Speaker 1: But that is that was my story. That no relevant,

1155
01:03:12,200 --> 01:03:13,040
Speaker 1: not relevant at all.