WEBVTT - Oscars

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<v Speaker 1>Hello, everyone, back here on the Run Burgundy podcast, and yes,

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<v Speaker 1>it's Hollywood's biggest night, the two thousand twenty one Academy Awards.

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<v Speaker 1>Stars are starting to arrive on the Red Carpet, and

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<v Speaker 1>I'll be here along with Carolina to get you all

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<v Speaker 1>the pre shows scoop on who will be taking home

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<v Speaker 1>a little man tonight called Oscar? What what are you doing?

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<v Speaker 1>What do you mean everything you just said in your intro?

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<v Speaker 1>It sounds like, do you think you're hosting the Red

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<v Speaker 1>Carpet pre show to the Academy Awards. This doesn't make

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<v Speaker 1>any sense. We're just doing the podcast. Okay, way to

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<v Speaker 1>roll along with my banter, Carolina? Did I miss something? See?

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<v Speaker 1>This is why I asked if we could get Lisa

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<v Speaker 1>Gibbons for this episode? Did Did anyone ever try to

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<v Speaker 1>call Lisa Gibbons? I don't understand what you're doing. Who

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<v Speaker 1>is Lisa Gibbons? Jesus, what the hell is the matter

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<v Speaker 1>with you? I've heard you say some really dumb things

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<v Speaker 1>on this show, But who is LEAs Gibbons to two

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<v Speaker 1>thousand correspondent and eventual co host for Entertainment Tonight Boom,

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<v Speaker 1>she has a damn daytime Emmy Award, which is more

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<v Speaker 1>than I can say for you. And can anyone get

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<v Speaker 1>her on the phone please, I want to get this

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<v Speaker 1>tape right. OK, calm down, what what are you talking about?

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<v Speaker 1>This is just a regular episode of the show. No, No,

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<v Speaker 1>it's not, Carolina. Look, let's get real here. This is

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<v Speaker 1>a podcast. Have you seen the Nielsen ratings for our show.

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<v Speaker 1>We're not cutting it, not by a long shot, probably

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<v Speaker 1>because there are no Nielsen ratings for podcasts. That's just

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<v Speaker 1>a thing for TV. Look, I've seen some numbers, Carolina,

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<v Speaker 1>And let me tell you this, Joe Rogan is kicking

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<v Speaker 1>our God, He's at the top of the Nielsen ratings

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<v Speaker 1>and I don't think that's ending anytime soon. You have

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<v Speaker 1>a lot to learn about the biz. Show biz. This

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<v Speaker 1>is a cruel mistress. I'm a very aware of how

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<v Speaker 1>tough show business. It's such a cruel mistress that sometimes

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<v Speaker 1>certain gentlemen who are stressed out actually use the services

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<v Speaker 1>of a professional dominatrix and have an actual cruel mistress

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<v Speaker 1>hit them on the behind with a whip to take

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<v Speaker 1>their mind off of the cruel mistress that is show business. Um.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't want to I don't ever want to revisit

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<v Speaker 1>that subject, and it's a whole other subject for a

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<v Speaker 1>whole other show, which we're just not going to do.

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<v Speaker 1>But it still doesn't really explain why you started the

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<v Speaker 1>podcast today, like we were hosting the Red carpet coverage

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<v Speaker 1>for the Academy Awards. All right, I'll love it with you.

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<v Speaker 1>I'd like to have a bunch of wheels spinning at once.

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<v Speaker 1>And I've been through so many ups and downs in

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<v Speaker 1>my career and the one thing that I've learned is

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<v Speaker 1>you've got to be ready for anything. So I figured,

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<v Speaker 1>why not take an episode of the podcast and use

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<v Speaker 1>it as an audition tape for the people that the

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<v Speaker 1>American Motion Picture Arts and Signs to see if maybe

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<v Speaker 1>me and Lisa Gibbons can host next year's Oscars. Has

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<v Speaker 1>anyone called Lisa Gibbons? I do not want to do

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<v Speaker 1>this with Carolina. You can't just hijack the show and

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<v Speaker 1>use it as an audition tape for the Red carpet

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<v Speaker 1>pre show to an awards ceremony. Really, what is the

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<v Speaker 1>show called the Ron Burgundy Podcast? And what's my name?

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<v Speaker 1>Ron Burgundy? And what is your name? Carolina? Exactly? It's

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<v Speaker 1>not Lisa Gibbons. I don't know what this. Lisa Gibbons

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<v Speaker 1>don't have a leg to stand on here, Okay, simple now,

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<v Speaker 1>Lisa Gibbons, she has two legs to stand on, and

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<v Speaker 1>I don't think she would mind me saying they're terrific,

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<v Speaker 1>have been for a long time. She knows, I know it.

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<v Speaker 1>The only person who doesn't know it is you, and

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<v Speaker 1>that's your fault. You cannot use the podcast as an

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<v Speaker 1>audition tape for the Oscars pre show. It's just so terrific.

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<v Speaker 1>Let's throw to commercial and then me and Lisa Gibbons

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<v Speaker 1>will be back with a special appearance from Oscar No money,

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<v Speaker 1>Laura Dern. Welcome back everyone. So just to catch you

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<v Speaker 1>up to speed, we could not get Lisa Gibbons on

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<v Speaker 1>the phone, even though I gave our producers her personal

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<v Speaker 1>phone number, which she gave me just so you know,

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<v Speaker 1>in the future, RON numbers that have five five in

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<v Speaker 1>them are usually fictional. Well I'll keep that in mind.

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<v Speaker 1>But Lisa Gibbons or not, we are going to pretend

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<v Speaker 1>it's the Academy Awards and you're going to help me

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<v Speaker 1>get the job of hosting the red carpet cover. Fine, whatever,

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<v Speaker 1>I just feel like they usually get younger people to

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<v Speaker 1>do that. Now, like Ryan Seacrest or Mario Lopez. Heyy,

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<v Speaker 1>what did I tell you? You shut your mouth? You

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<v Speaker 1>you shut your mouth right now about Mario Lopez's a friend.

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't say anything bad about him. I don't, but

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<v Speaker 1>I don't want to be in competition with Mario Lopez.

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<v Speaker 1>I happen to know he's not going to be available

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<v Speaker 1>to host the OSCARS pre show next year. That's why

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<v Speaker 1>I'm even considering doing this in the first place. How

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<v Speaker 1>do you know Mario Lopez isn't doing it? Because friends talk? Carolina. Also,

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<v Speaker 1>we recently went on a whitewater rafting trip together, and

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<v Speaker 1>I I think he's going to be laid up for

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<v Speaker 1>a while. Oh my god, did something happen to Mario Lopez?

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<v Speaker 1>Was he injured? It's nothing, really, the trip, No, it's nothing.

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<v Speaker 1>I was supposed to be rowing, but I got hungry

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<v Speaker 1>and I reached into my lunch sack for some venison jerky.

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<v Speaker 1>I swear I only put the ore down for like

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<v Speaker 1>three minutes tops. Anyway, Mario Lopez is going to be fine. America.

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<v Speaker 1>Nothing a full body cast and six months of intense

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<v Speaker 1>rehabilitation won't fix, so get well soon. Mario, We love you, buddy.

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<v Speaker 1>Run Did you intentionally cause a whitewater rafting accident with

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<v Speaker 1>Mario Lopez so that you could get a chance to

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<v Speaker 1>possibly host the Red Carpet pre show of the Oscars

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<v Speaker 1>next year? No? And oh spells no, I can't believe

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<v Speaker 1>you'd even make that accusation. That is so sick, Carolina.

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<v Speaker 1>You have a sick mind. And with that, let's go

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<v Speaker 1>to our three sixty cams so we can get a

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<v Speaker 1>look at all the great fashion tonight. I Ron, if

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<v Speaker 1>you seriously want to do this, that was a terrible

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<v Speaker 1>say who are you wearing tonight? Carolina? It appears you've

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<v Speaker 1>just dressed in sweatpants a T shirt from what is that?

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<v Speaker 1>Crank Anchors? That's a funny show. Yeah, but this is

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<v Speaker 1>the Oscars. My god, you look like trash. Okay, now

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<v Speaker 1>I'm just being bitchy like the late great Joan Rivers.

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<v Speaker 1>Rest in peace. If you're just going to be insulting,

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<v Speaker 1>I can leave, no stay. You can submit this to

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<v Speaker 1>the tape. The Red Carpet hosting gig is always a

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<v Speaker 1>two hander. And if you could just dial up Liza Gibbons,

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<v Speaker 1>I would be great. I'll do my best. But I

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<v Speaker 1>didn't come unprepared for this. Since there's no way for

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<v Speaker 1>us to know what boring films are gonna be the

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<v Speaker 1>big winners next year because they haven't come out yet.

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<v Speaker 1>I went and pulled some information from the sixtieth Academy Awards,

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<v Speaker 1>which happened in why don't we just do last year's

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<v Speaker 1>Oscars so they have a more fresh take on your

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<v Speaker 1>hosting ability? Well, if I'm being honest, I didn't see

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<v Speaker 1>any of the movies from last year. The one that

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<v Speaker 1>one Best Picture had subtitles, so you know, right, that's

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<v Speaker 1>an automatic note from you. They make them too small.

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<v Speaker 1>They make them too small. When I'm on a teleprompter,

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<v Speaker 1>they used three point type. Also, there was another matter

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<v Speaker 1>of me no longer being sent screeners because of a

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<v Speaker 1>misunderstanding with the union. What was the misunderstanding? It's really silly.

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<v Speaker 1>I had this neighbor who I swore was stealing packages

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<v Speaker 1>from in front of my house, so late one night

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<v Speaker 1>I whipped a DVD of something called Uncut Gems straight

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<v Speaker 1>through his bedroom window. It shattered the glass and scared

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<v Speaker 1>the Bejesus out of him. That is just awful. That's

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<v Speaker 1>destruction of property. Someone could have really gotten hurt, just

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<v Speaker 1>like Mario Lopez on that wrap. Well joke ended up

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<v Speaker 1>on me because my neighbor took it and made a

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<v Speaker 1>bunch of copies and started selling them out of the

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<v Speaker 1>trunk of his car. And that's that's why I don't

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<v Speaker 1>get screeners anymore. To be fair, Uncut Gems was a

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<v Speaker 1>really great movie. I haven't seen it because it landed

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<v Speaker 1>on the floor of my neighbor's bedroom. But from what

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<v Speaker 1>I'm hearing, the Sandman was robbed. Anyway, Can we just

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<v Speaker 1>go over this Academy Awards stuff I've prepared? Sure, whatever

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<v Speaker 1>you want to do? Think okay, now, act like Share

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<v Speaker 1>is walking down the red carpet. Okay, Hey, hey, Lisa Gibbons,

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<v Speaker 1>snap out of it. It's Share nominated tonight for Best

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<v Speaker 1>Actress of her performance in the film Moonstruck. Share so

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<v Speaker 1>lovely to see you. You pretend to be Shared. Pretend

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<v Speaker 1>to be Shared. Let's have some friendly banter. Okay? Is

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<v Speaker 1>that so hard to Okay? What I've hello, Ron, it's

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<v Speaker 1>me Share, It certainly is. And may I say you

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<v Speaker 1>look ravishing this evening? I think everyone is picking you

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<v Speaker 1>as the winner. Tonight, the scene where you slap Nicholas

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<v Speaker 1>Cage in the face and tell him to snap out

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<v Speaker 1>of it? Did you know that that was going to

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<v Speaker 1>be a classic momentum. I was just really in the

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<v Speaker 1>scene and now share I think you love this, Lisa Gibbons,

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<v Speaker 1>and I have put together a little something for you

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<v Speaker 1>as a good luck charm tonight. What the kron You

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<v Speaker 1>just hit me? Snap out of it, Lisa Gibbons. Roun,

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<v Speaker 1>you just slapped me in the face. Hey, yeah, he

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<v Speaker 1>don't strike me, Lisa Gibbons, I'll strike you. Oh, Carolina,

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<v Speaker 1>not really hurt me. You were slapping me. I was

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<v Speaker 1>just defending myself to stage slaps. No, you would do

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<v Speaker 1>to play. You were doing full up slaps. I did

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<v Speaker 1>it like twice. Carolina. Good you're gonna shoot me? They

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<v Speaker 1>were warning shots. You brought out your gun. They were

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<v Speaker 1>warning shots. Okay, they were nowhere near you, and you

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<v Speaker 1>know it. You're crying. You brought out the gun and

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<v Speaker 1>you're crying. Oh my god, you can't Okay, you can't

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<v Speaker 1>bring any I've told you this. You can't bring the

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<v Speaker 1>gun to the recording studio. Do you understand what was happening?

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<v Speaker 1>I was the scene from Moonstruck, and I was slapping

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<v Speaker 1>you as Share the way she slapped Nicholas Cade. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>I just want to get this straight. You were going

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<v Speaker 1>to slap Share in the face, and I thought that

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<v Speaker 1>this would go over well. I think she'd really get

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<v Speaker 1>a kick out of it. I was recreating the scene.

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<v Speaker 1>She really doesn't see. I don't know what anyone who

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<v Speaker 1>seems like they would like that, But she'd be very least,

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<v Speaker 1>she'd be very surprised. But yeah, I very surprised. Maybe

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<v Speaker 1>you got to create moments on the red carpet. You

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<v Speaker 1>would not get hired with this audition. Let's just keep going.

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<v Speaker 1>Nominated for Best Original Screenplay tonight for Radio Days is

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<v Speaker 1>Mr Woody You know what, let's just skip that one. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>calling that run exactly. He never shows up to the

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<v Speaker 1>award shows anyway. Oh wait, who's that? Why? It's Glenn Close,

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<v Speaker 1>nominated tonight for her terrifying role in Fatal Attraction. Glenn,

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<v Speaker 1>welcome to Hollywood's Biggest night. Okay, I'm supposed to be

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<v Speaker 1>going close now, Yes, yes, be Glynn close. Hear God?

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<v Speaker 1>If you could just put a little bit of effort

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<v Speaker 1>in at this would be so helpful. Sap I was

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<v Speaker 1>in the moment. Whatever, Hi, Ron Burgundy, I'm gun close.

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<v Speaker 1>I am surprised to see you here tonight at the

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<v Speaker 1>oscar Not as surprised as I was when I saw

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<v Speaker 1>what a psycho tour and fatal attraction. Stay away from

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<v Speaker 1>my bunny. It's glen clothes. Okay, run stop. You can't

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<v Speaker 1>call going close a psycho on the red carpet. Well, look,

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<v Speaker 1>I was referring to the care I mean, have you

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<v Speaker 1>seen fatal attraction? Yeah, I've seen it. It's just I

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<v Speaker 1>don't think you're cut out for this, Carolina. Just we're

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<v Speaker 1>supposed to be a team here. I'll tell you what

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<v Speaker 1>if I get this gig you're in and Liza Gibbons

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<v Speaker 1>is out, how does that sound. There's no way you're

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<v Speaker 1>getting this. But whatever, just do not slop me again.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh wow. Now this is a treat Nominated for his

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<v Speaker 1>song in my second favorite movie of the year besides RoboCop,

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<v Speaker 1>It's Bob Seeger nominated tonight for Shakedown. This song from

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<v Speaker 1>the film Beverly Hills Cup to Hi, Ron, It's me

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<v Speaker 1>Bob Seger. I guess you left the Silver Bullet Band

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<v Speaker 1>back home tonight. Huh can you can you laugh like

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<v Speaker 1>ha ha ha ha. Now, Bob, you've got some tough

0:12:56.920 --> 0:13:00.880
<v Speaker 1>competition tonight from the film Dirty Dancing. Are you guys?

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<v Speaker 1>Are you nervous or are you too much of a

0:13:03.720 --> 0:13:06.000
<v Speaker 1>rock and roll coop guy to care about these things?

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<v Speaker 1>I just you know, whatever happens happens. Seriously, Carolina, that's

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<v Speaker 1>your Bob Seegert impression? Can you put on a gruff

0:13:16.120 --> 0:13:21.280
<v Speaker 1>manly voice. Just I'm Bob Seger, and I hope I

0:13:21.360 --> 0:13:25.600
<v Speaker 1>win an oscar in night. No, no, no, he would

0:13:25.640 --> 0:13:28.560
<v Speaker 1>never say that, Not Bob Seeger. He's too cool to

0:13:28.559 --> 0:13:32.679
<v Speaker 1>say something like that, Carolina, that sucked. It was awful.

0:13:33.600 --> 0:13:37.319
<v Speaker 1>Bob Seeger. If you're listening, and I'm pretty sure you are,

0:13:37.440 --> 0:13:43.600
<v Speaker 1>I apologize. I apologize for Carolina is awful impression of you,

0:13:44.400 --> 0:13:47.280
<v Speaker 1>and I'm sorry you lost to I've had the time

0:13:47.320 --> 0:13:51.000
<v Speaker 1>of my life from Dirty Dancing. I cannot believe what

0:13:51.040 --> 0:13:53.520
<v Speaker 1>a waste of time this has been. I think we

0:13:53.559 --> 0:13:56.240
<v Speaker 1>can salvage someone. Maybe I can get Lisa Givens to

0:13:56.280 --> 0:13:59.480
<v Speaker 1>overdub your parts. Are we done with this nonsense? We'll

0:13:59.559 --> 0:14:03.680
<v Speaker 1>take a We are minutes away from Hollywood's biggest night.

0:14:04.080 --> 0:14:21.560
<v Speaker 1>Back here after this we are boy, we are back

0:14:21.600 --> 0:14:26.200
<v Speaker 1>here the Ron Burgundy Podcast. I've just been told this

0:14:26.280 --> 0:14:29.880
<v Speaker 1>is actually the season finale of The Ron Burgundy Podcast.

0:14:31.440 --> 0:14:34.160
<v Speaker 1>Wait you didn't know that, Yes, this is it. This

0:14:34.200 --> 0:14:37.400
<v Speaker 1>is the season finale. So this is the episode, of

0:14:37.440 --> 0:14:40.160
<v Speaker 1>course where you shot at the ceiling. So this might

0:14:40.200 --> 0:14:42.320
<v Speaker 1>be the last show we ever do. Well, that's up

0:14:42.320 --> 0:14:45.200
<v Speaker 1>to my heart radio. I just used it to make

0:14:45.200 --> 0:14:47.720
<v Speaker 1>an audition tape for the Red Carpet pre show to

0:14:47.760 --> 0:14:51.000
<v Speaker 1>the Academy Awards. Yes, we could have had an interesting

0:14:51.040 --> 0:14:53.880
<v Speaker 1>topic or chatted with a guest, but we went down

0:14:53.920 --> 0:14:57.960
<v Speaker 1>this road of yours. You know what. I call me crazy,

0:14:58.000 --> 0:15:00.440
<v Speaker 1>but I feel absolutely confident we did the right thing.

0:15:00.560 --> 0:15:03.280
<v Speaker 1>That's insane, that's crazy, and I have a feeling we'll

0:15:03.320 --> 0:15:05.720
<v Speaker 1>be back for a season four and you just might

0:15:05.800 --> 0:15:09.240
<v Speaker 1>see me and Carolina hosting the Red Carpet pre show

0:15:09.280 --> 0:15:13.440
<v Speaker 1>of the Oscars next time around, unless Lisa Gibbons is available.

0:15:14.400 --> 0:15:17.760
<v Speaker 1>I've run um, never slapped me in the face again,

0:15:18.200 --> 0:15:21.120
<v Speaker 1>and never shoot a gun in the studio again. I mean,

0:15:21.160 --> 0:15:24.800
<v Speaker 1>I feel like that's a reasonable request. I've asked you.

0:15:24.880 --> 0:15:27.520
<v Speaker 1>Thanks to all of our listeners and all that stuff

0:15:27.560 --> 0:15:30.160
<v Speaker 1>I was saying about the Nielsen's ratings earlier. I was

0:15:30.200 --> 0:15:33.000
<v Speaker 1>just joking around. Joe Rogan is a cool guy and

0:15:33.040 --> 0:15:35.880
<v Speaker 1>I and I very much do not want him to

0:15:35.960 --> 0:15:39.280
<v Speaker 1>beat me up. That's the great thing about podcast. There's

0:15:39.360 --> 0:15:45.560
<v Speaker 1>room for everyone, including me, Ron Burgundy. Any any final thoughts, Carolina,

0:15:46.600 --> 0:15:49.040
<v Speaker 1>I just want to say it's been an interesting season.

0:15:49.360 --> 0:15:55.760
<v Speaker 1>I feel like we've grown as broadcasters, and as crazy

0:15:55.760 --> 0:15:59.200
<v Speaker 1>as it sounds, I'd like to continue doing this with you. Well,

0:15:59.800 --> 0:16:02.600
<v Speaker 1>I feel the same, whether it's well it's me developing

0:16:02.640 --> 0:16:05.960
<v Speaker 1>a genuine affection for you or a simple case of

0:16:06.000 --> 0:16:09.600
<v Speaker 1>Stockholm syndrome. I'm sure we'll be speaking to you again

0:16:09.720 --> 0:16:12.920
<v Speaker 1>soon for the Ron Burgundy Podcast. This is Ron Burgundy

0:16:13.000 --> 0:16:15.720
<v Speaker 1>saying Steak Glassie, and thank you to I Heart Radio

0:16:16.280 --> 0:16:19.600
<v Speaker 1>for the money. We really enjoy it, as well as

0:16:19.680 --> 0:16:24.320
<v Speaker 1>doing the show. Until next time. I'm got a special

0:16:24.320 --> 0:16:26.840
<v Speaker 1>treatment only for our listeners, but for you, Carolina, I'm

0:16:26.880 --> 0:16:29.280
<v Speaker 1>just gonna light this is that a spark flight? No,

0:16:29.400 --> 0:16:32.160
<v Speaker 1>it's a Roman candle. Let's get out, We'll get out,

0:16:32.280 --> 0:16:38.760
<v Speaker 1>get out. Oh it's really look at a flame? Whoa, whoa, Yeah,

0:16:38.920 --> 0:16:42.000
<v Speaker 1>everybody get out. We're a box of my thousand. I

0:16:42.080 --> 0:16:50.440
<v Speaker 1>bought a box of my thousand down in New Mexico

0:16:52.520 --> 0:16:56.640
<v Speaker 1>prom day for Nickna. Forget the key, unwalk the studio.

0:16:57.600 --> 0:17:01.400
<v Speaker 1>We're in here, Carolina. We gotta ride it out. WHOA,

0:17:03.760 --> 0:17:08.080
<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna have to ride out. Cover Cover yourself with

0:17:08.200 --> 0:17:12.880
<v Speaker 1>my jacket. Pull that bottle of water over your head.

0:17:15.960 --> 0:17:21.200
<v Speaker 1>Oh it's we're not even in the worst part yet.

0:17:21.240 --> 0:17:26.359
<v Speaker 1>My hair. That's your hair. Jump down the door if

0:17:26.359 --> 0:17:36.080
<v Speaker 1>you can. Oh. I shouldn't have bought the jumbo back.

0:17:36.240 --> 0:17:51.360
<v Speaker 1>So many fireworks, there's so many fireworks. The Ron Burgundy

0:17:51.400 --> 0:17:55.360
<v Speaker 1>Podcast is a production of I Heart Radio. I'm Ron Burgundy.

0:17:55.400 --> 0:17:59.720
<v Speaker 1>The host, writer and executive producer. Carolina Barlow is my

0:17:59.800 --> 0:18:04.000
<v Speaker 1>co host, writer and producer. Our producer is Nick Stump.

0:18:04.480 --> 0:18:08.960
<v Speaker 1>Our talent coordinator is Anna Hosnia. Writers are Andrew Steele

0:18:09.040 --> 0:18:13.159
<v Speaker 1>and Jake Vogelness. This episode was engineered, mixed and editing

0:18:13.400 --> 0:18:18.000
<v Speaker 1>by Nick Stump. Until next time, This is Ron Burgundy.

0:18:19.440 --> 0:18:19.480
<v Speaker 1>M