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Speaker 1: Hello, everyone, back here on the Run Burgundy podcast, and yes,

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Speaker 1: it's Hollywood's biggest night, the two thousand twenty one Academy Awards.

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Speaker 1: Stars are starting to arrive on the Red Carpet, and

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Speaker 1: I'll be here along with Carolina to get you all

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Speaker 1: the pre shows scoop on who will be taking home

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Speaker 1: a little man tonight called Oscar? What what are you doing?

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Speaker 1: What do you mean everything you just said in your intro?

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Speaker 1: It sounds like, do you think you're hosting the Red

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Speaker 1: Carpet pre show to the Academy Awards. This doesn't make

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Speaker 1: any sense. We're just doing the podcast. Okay, way to

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Speaker 1: roll along with my banter, Carolina? Did I miss something? See?

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Speaker 1: This is why I asked if we could get Lisa

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Speaker 1: Gibbons for this episode? Did Did anyone ever try to

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Speaker 1: call Lisa Gibbons? I don't understand what you're doing. Who

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Speaker 1: is Lisa Gibbons? Jesus, what the hell is the matter

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Speaker 1: with you? I've heard you say some really dumb things

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Speaker 1: on this show, But who is LEAs Gibbons to two

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Speaker 1: thousand correspondent and eventual co host for Entertainment Tonight Boom,

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Speaker 1: she has a damn daytime Emmy Award, which is more

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Speaker 1: than I can say for you. And can anyone get

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Speaker 1: her on the phone please, I want to get this

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Speaker 1: tape right. OK, calm down, what what are you talking about?

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Speaker 1: This is just a regular episode of the show. No, No,

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Speaker 1: it's not, Carolina. Look, let's get real here. This is

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Speaker 1: a podcast. Have you seen the Nielsen ratings for our show.

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Speaker 1: We're not cutting it, not by a long shot, probably

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Speaker 1: because there are no Nielsen ratings for podcasts. That's just

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Speaker 1: a thing for TV. Look, I've seen some numbers, Carolina,

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Speaker 1: And let me tell you this, Joe Rogan is kicking

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Speaker 1: our God, He's at the top of the Nielsen ratings

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Speaker 1: and I don't think that's ending anytime soon. You have

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Speaker 1: a lot to learn about the biz. Show biz. This

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Speaker 1: is a cruel mistress. I'm a very aware of how

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Speaker 1: tough show business. It's such a cruel mistress that sometimes

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Speaker 1: certain gentlemen who are stressed out actually use the services

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Speaker 1: of a professional dominatrix and have an actual cruel mistress

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Speaker 1: hit them on the behind with a whip to take

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Speaker 1: their mind off of the cruel mistress that is show business. Um.

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Speaker 1: I don't want to I don't ever want to revisit

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Speaker 1: that subject, and it's a whole other subject for a

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Speaker 1: whole other show, which we're just not going to do.

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Speaker 1: But it still doesn't really explain why you started the

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Speaker 1: podcast today, like we were hosting the Red carpet coverage

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Speaker 1: for the Academy Awards. All right, I'll love it with you.

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Speaker 1: I'd like to have a bunch of wheels spinning at once.

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Speaker 1: And I've been through so many ups and downs in

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Speaker 1: my career and the one thing that I've learned is

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Speaker 1: you've got to be ready for anything. So I figured,

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Speaker 1: why not take an episode of the podcast and use

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Speaker 1: it as an audition tape for the people that the

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Speaker 1: American Motion Picture Arts and Signs to see if maybe

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Speaker 1: me and Lisa Gibbons can host next year's Oscars. Has

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Speaker 1: anyone called Lisa Gibbons? I do not want to do

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Speaker 1: this with Carolina. You can't just hijack the show and

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Speaker 1: use it as an audition tape for the Red carpet

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Speaker 1: pre show to an awards ceremony. Really, what is the

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Speaker 1: show called the Ron Burgundy Podcast? And what's my name?

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Speaker 1: Ron Burgundy? And what is your name? Carolina? Exactly? It's

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Speaker 1: not Lisa Gibbons. I don't know what this. Lisa Gibbons

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Speaker 1: don't have a leg to stand on here, Okay, simple now,

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Speaker 1: Lisa Gibbons, she has two legs to stand on, and

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Speaker 1: I don't think she would mind me saying they're terrific,

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Speaker 1: have been for a long time. She knows, I know it.

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Speaker 1: The only person who doesn't know it is you, and

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Speaker 1: that's your fault. You cannot use the podcast as an

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Speaker 1: audition tape for the Oscars pre show. It's just so terrific.

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Speaker 1: Let's throw to commercial and then me and Lisa Gibbons

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Speaker 1: will be back with a special appearance from Oscar No money,

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Speaker 1: Laura Dern. Welcome back everyone. So just to catch you

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Speaker 1: up to speed, we could not get Lisa Gibbons on

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Speaker 1: the phone, even though I gave our producers her personal

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Speaker 1: phone number, which she gave me just so you know,

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Speaker 1: in the future, RON numbers that have five five in

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Speaker 1: them are usually fictional. Well I'll keep that in mind.

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Speaker 1: But Lisa Gibbons or not, we are going to pretend

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Speaker 1: it's the Academy Awards and you're going to help me

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Speaker 1: get the job of hosting the red carpet cover. Fine, whatever,

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Speaker 1: I just feel like they usually get younger people to

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Speaker 1: do that. Now, like Ryan Seacrest or Mario Lopez. Heyy,

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Speaker 1: what did I tell you? You shut your mouth? You

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Speaker 1: you shut your mouth right now about Mario Lopez's a friend.

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Speaker 1: I didn't say anything bad about him. I don't, but

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Speaker 1: I don't want to be in competition with Mario Lopez.

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Speaker 1: I happen to know he's not going to be available

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Speaker 1: to host the OSCARS pre show next year. That's why

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Speaker 1: I'm even considering doing this in the first place. How

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Speaker 1: do you know Mario Lopez isn't doing it? Because friends talk? Carolina. Also,

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Speaker 1: we recently went on a whitewater rafting trip together, and

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Speaker 1: I I think he's going to be laid up for

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Speaker 1: a while. Oh my god, did something happen to Mario Lopez?

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Speaker 1: Was he injured? It's nothing, really, the trip, No, it's nothing.

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Speaker 1: I was supposed to be rowing, but I got hungry

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Speaker 1: and I reached into my lunch sack for some venison jerky.

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Speaker 1: I swear I only put the ore down for like

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Speaker 1: three minutes tops. Anyway, Mario Lopez is going to be fine. America.

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Speaker 1: Nothing a full body cast and six months of intense

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Speaker 1: rehabilitation won't fix, so get well soon. Mario, We love you, buddy.

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Speaker 1: Run Did you intentionally cause a whitewater rafting accident with

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Speaker 1: Mario Lopez so that you could get a chance to

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Speaker 1: possibly host the Red Carpet pre show of the Oscars

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Speaker 1: next year? No? And oh spells no, I can't believe

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Speaker 1: you'd even make that accusation. That is so sick, Carolina.

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Speaker 1: You have a sick mind. And with that, let's go

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Speaker 1: to our three sixty cams so we can get a

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Speaker 1: look at all the great fashion tonight. I Ron, if

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Speaker 1: you seriously want to do this, that was a terrible

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Speaker 1: say who are you wearing tonight? Carolina? It appears you've

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Speaker 1: just dressed in sweatpants a T shirt from what is that?

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Speaker 1: Crank Anchors? That's a funny show. Yeah, but this is

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Speaker 1: the Oscars. My god, you look like trash. Okay, now

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Speaker 1: I'm just being bitchy like the late great Joan Rivers.

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Speaker 1: Rest in peace. If you're just going to be insulting,

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Speaker 1: I can leave, no stay. You can submit this to

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Speaker 1: the tape. The Red Carpet hosting gig is always a

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Speaker 1: two hander. And if you could just dial up Liza Gibbons,

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Speaker 1: I would be great. I'll do my best. But I

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Speaker 1: didn't come unprepared for this. Since there's no way for

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Speaker 1: us to know what boring films are gonna be the

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Speaker 1: big winners next year because they haven't come out yet.

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Speaker 1: I went and pulled some information from the sixtieth Academy Awards,

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Speaker 1: which happened in why don't we just do last year's

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Speaker 1: Oscars so they have a more fresh take on your

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Speaker 1: hosting ability? Well, if I'm being honest, I didn't see

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Speaker 1: any of the movies from last year. The one that

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Speaker 1: one Best Picture had subtitles, so you know, right, that's

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Speaker 1: an automatic note from you. They make them too small.

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Speaker 1: They make them too small. When I'm on a teleprompter,

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Speaker 1: they used three point type. Also, there was another matter

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Speaker 1: of me no longer being sent screeners because of a

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Speaker 1: misunderstanding with the union. What was the misunderstanding? It's really silly.

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Speaker 1: I had this neighbor who I swore was stealing packages

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Speaker 1: from in front of my house, so late one night

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Speaker 1: I whipped a DVD of something called Uncut Gems straight

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Speaker 1: through his bedroom window. It shattered the glass and scared

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Speaker 1: the Bejesus out of him. That is just awful. That's

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Speaker 1: destruction of property. Someone could have really gotten hurt, just

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Speaker 1: like Mario Lopez on that wrap. Well joke ended up

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Speaker 1: on me because my neighbor took it and made a

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Speaker 1: bunch of copies and started selling them out of the

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Speaker 1: trunk of his car. And that's that's why I don't

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Speaker 1: get screeners anymore. To be fair, Uncut Gems was a

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Speaker 1: really great movie. I haven't seen it because it landed

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Speaker 1: on the floor of my neighbor's bedroom. But from what

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Speaker 1: I'm hearing, the Sandman was robbed. Anyway, Can we just

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Speaker 1: go over this Academy Awards stuff I've prepared? Sure, whatever

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Speaker 1: you want to do? Think okay, now, act like Share

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Speaker 1: is walking down the red carpet. Okay, Hey, hey, Lisa Gibbons,

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Speaker 1: snap out of it. It's Share nominated tonight for Best

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Speaker 1: Actress of her performance in the film Moonstruck. Share so

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Speaker 1: lovely to see you. You pretend to be Shared. Pretend

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Speaker 1: to be Shared. Let's have some friendly banter. Okay? Is

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Speaker 1: that so hard to Okay? What I've hello, Ron, it's

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Speaker 1: me Share, It certainly is. And may I say you

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Speaker 1: look ravishing this evening? I think everyone is picking you

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Speaker 1: as the winner. Tonight, the scene where you slap Nicholas

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Speaker 1: Cage in the face and tell him to snap out

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Speaker 1: of it? Did you know that that was going to

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Speaker 1: be a classic momentum. I was just really in the

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Speaker 1: scene and now share I think you love this, Lisa Gibbons,

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Speaker 1: and I have put together a little something for you

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Speaker 1: as a good luck charm tonight. What the kron You

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Speaker 1: just hit me? Snap out of it, Lisa Gibbons. Roun,

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Speaker 1: you just slapped me in the face. Hey, yeah, he

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Speaker 1: don't strike me, Lisa Gibbons, I'll strike you. Oh, Carolina,

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Speaker 1: not really hurt me. You were slapping me. I was

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Speaker 1: just defending myself to stage slaps. No, you would do

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Speaker 1: to play. You were doing full up slaps. I did

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Speaker 1: it like twice. Carolina. Good you're gonna shoot me? They

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Speaker 1: were warning shots. You brought out your gun. They were

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Speaker 1: warning shots. Okay, they were nowhere near you, and you

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Speaker 1: know it. You're crying. You brought out the gun and

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Speaker 1: you're crying. Oh my god, you can't Okay, you can't

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Speaker 1: bring any I've told you this. You can't bring the

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Speaker 1: gun to the recording studio. Do you understand what was happening?

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Speaker 1: I was the scene from Moonstruck, and I was slapping

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Speaker 1: you as Share the way she slapped Nicholas Cade. Okay,

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Speaker 1: I just want to get this straight. You were going

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Speaker 1: to slap Share in the face, and I thought that

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Speaker 1: this would go over well. I think she'd really get

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Speaker 1: a kick out of it. I was recreating the scene.

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Speaker 1: She really doesn't see. I don't know what anyone who

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Speaker 1: seems like they would like that, But she'd be very least,

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Speaker 1: she'd be very surprised. But yeah, I very surprised. Maybe

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Speaker 1: you got to create moments on the red carpet. You

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Speaker 1: would not get hired with this audition. Let's just keep going.

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Speaker 1: Nominated for Best Original Screenplay tonight for Radio Days is

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Speaker 1: Mr Woody You know what, let's just skip that one. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: calling that run exactly. He never shows up to the

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Speaker 1: award shows anyway. Oh wait, who's that? Why? It's Glenn Close,

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Speaker 1: nominated tonight for her terrifying role in Fatal Attraction. Glenn,

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Speaker 1: welcome to Hollywood's Biggest night. Okay, I'm supposed to be

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Speaker 1: going close now, Yes, yes, be Glynn close. Hear God?

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Speaker 1: If you could just put a little bit of effort

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Speaker 1: in at this would be so helpful. Sap I was

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Speaker 1: in the moment. Whatever, Hi, Ron Burgundy, I'm gun close.

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Speaker 1: I am surprised to see you here tonight at the

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Speaker 1: oscar Not as surprised as I was when I saw

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Speaker 1: what a psycho tour and fatal attraction. Stay away from

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Speaker 1: my bunny. It's glen clothes. Okay, run stop. You can't

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Speaker 1: call going close a psycho on the red carpet. Well, look,

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Speaker 1: I was referring to the care I mean, have you

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Speaker 1: seen fatal attraction? Yeah, I've seen it. It's just I

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Speaker 1: don't think you're cut out for this, Carolina. Just we're

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Speaker 1: supposed to be a team here. I'll tell you what

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Speaker 1: if I get this gig you're in and Liza Gibbons

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Speaker 1: is out, how does that sound. There's no way you're

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Speaker 1: getting this. But whatever, just do not slop me again.

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Speaker 1: Oh wow. Now this is a treat Nominated for his

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Speaker 1: song in my second favorite movie of the year besides RoboCop,

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Speaker 1: It's Bob Seeger nominated tonight for Shakedown. This song from

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Speaker 1: the film Beverly Hills Cup to Hi, Ron, It's me

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Speaker 1: Bob Seger. I guess you left the Silver Bullet Band

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Speaker 1: back home tonight. Huh can you can you laugh like

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Speaker 1: ha ha ha ha. Now, Bob, you've got some tough

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Speaker 1: competition tonight from the film Dirty Dancing. Are you guys?

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Speaker 1: Are you nervous or are you too much of a

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Speaker 1: rock and roll coop guy to care about these things?

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Speaker 1: I just you know, whatever happens happens. Seriously, Carolina, that's

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Speaker 1: your Bob Seegert impression? Can you put on a gruff

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Speaker 1: manly voice. Just I'm Bob Seger, and I hope I

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Speaker 1: win an oscar in night. No, no, no, he would

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Speaker 1: never say that, Not Bob Seeger. He's too cool to

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Speaker 1: say something like that, Carolina, that sucked. It was awful.

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Speaker 1: Bob Seeger. If you're listening, and I'm pretty sure you are,

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Speaker 1: I apologize. I apologize for Carolina is awful impression of you,

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Speaker 1: and I'm sorry you lost to I've had the time

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Speaker 1: of my life from Dirty Dancing. I cannot believe what

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Speaker 1: a waste of time this has been. I think we

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Speaker 1: can salvage someone. Maybe I can get Lisa Givens to

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Speaker 1: overdub your parts. Are we done with this nonsense? We'll

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Speaker 1: take a We are minutes away from Hollywood's biggest night.

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Speaker 1: Back here after this we are boy, we are back

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Speaker 1: here the Ron Burgundy Podcast. I've just been told this

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Speaker 1: is actually the season finale of The Ron Burgundy Podcast.

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Speaker 1: Wait you didn't know that, Yes, this is it. This

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Speaker 1: is the season finale. So this is the episode, of

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Speaker 1: course where you shot at the ceiling. So this might

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Speaker 1: be the last show we ever do. Well, that's up

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Speaker 1: to my heart radio. I just used it to make

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Speaker 1: an audition tape for the Red Carpet pre show to

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Speaker 1: the Academy Awards. Yes, we could have had an interesting

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Speaker 1: topic or chatted with a guest, but we went down

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Speaker 1: this road of yours. You know what. I call me crazy,

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Speaker 1: but I feel absolutely confident we did the right thing.

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Speaker 1: That's insane, that's crazy, and I have a feeling we'll

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Speaker 1: be back for a season four and you just might

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Speaker 1: see me and Carolina hosting the Red Carpet pre show

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Speaker 1: of the Oscars next time around, unless Lisa Gibbons is available.

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Speaker 1: I've run um, never slapped me in the face again,

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Speaker 1: and never shoot a gun in the studio again. I mean,

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Speaker 1: I feel like that's a reasonable request. I've asked you.

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Speaker 1: Thanks to all of our listeners and all that stuff

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Speaker 1: I was saying about the Nielsen's ratings earlier. I was

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Speaker 1: just joking around. Joe Rogan is a cool guy and

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Speaker 1: I and I very much do not want him to

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Speaker 1: beat me up. That's the great thing about podcast. There's

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Speaker 1: room for everyone, including me, Ron Burgundy. Any any final thoughts, Carolina,

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Speaker 1: I just want to say it's been an interesting season.

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Speaker 1: I feel like we've grown as broadcasters, and as crazy

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Speaker 1: as it sounds, I'd like to continue doing this with you. Well,

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Speaker 1: I feel the same, whether it's well it's me developing

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Speaker 1: a genuine affection for you or a simple case of

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Speaker 1: Stockholm syndrome. I'm sure we'll be speaking to you again

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Speaker 1: soon for the Ron Burgundy Podcast. This is Ron Burgundy

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Speaker 1: saying Steak Glassie, and thank you to I Heart Radio

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Speaker 1: for the money. We really enjoy it, as well as

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Speaker 1: doing the show. Until next time. I'm got a special

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Speaker 1: treatment only for our listeners, but for you, Carolina, I'm

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Speaker 1: just gonna light this is that a spark flight? No,

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Speaker 1: it's a Roman candle. Let's get out, We'll get out,

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Speaker 1: get out. Oh it's really look at a flame? Whoa, whoa, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: everybody get out. We're a box of my thousand. I

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Speaker 1: bought a box of my thousand down in New Mexico

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Speaker 1: prom day for Nickna. Forget the key, unwalk the studio.

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Speaker 1: We're in here, Carolina. We gotta ride it out. WHOA,

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna have to ride out. Cover Cover yourself with

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Speaker 1: my jacket. Pull that bottle of water over your head.

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Speaker 1: Oh it's we're not even in the worst part yet.

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Speaker 1: My hair. That's your hair. Jump down the door if

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Speaker 1: you can. Oh. I shouldn't have bought the jumbo back.

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Speaker 1: So many fireworks, there's so many fireworks. The Ron Burgundy

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Speaker 1: Podcast is a production of I Heart Radio. I'm Ron Burgundy.

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Speaker 1: The host, writer and executive producer. Carolina Barlow is my

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Speaker 1: co host, writer and producer. Our producer is Nick Stump.

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Speaker 1: Our talent coordinator is Anna Hosnia. Writers are Andrew Steele

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Speaker 1: and Jake Vogelness. This episode was engineered, mixed and editing

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Speaker 1: by Nick Stump. Until next time, This is Ron Burgundy.

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Speaker 1: M