Speaker 1: We don't have enough time in silence, like as a society,
Speaker 1: we don't have enough quiet time. Welcome to the one
Speaker 1: you feed throughout time. Great thinkers have recognized the importance
Speaker 1: of the thoughts we have, quotes like garbage in, garbage out,
Speaker 1: or you are what you think ring true, and yet
Speaker 1: for many of us, our thoughts don't strengthen or empower us.
Speaker 1: We tend toward negativity, self pity, jealousy, or fear. We
Speaker 1: see what we don't have instead of what we do.
Speaker 1: We think things that hold us back and dampen our spirit.
Speaker 1: But it's not just about thinking. Our actions matter. It
Speaker 1: takes conscious, consistent, and creative effort to make a life
Speaker 1: worth living. This podcast is about how other people keep
Speaker 1: themselves moving in the right direction, how they feed their
Speaker 1: good wolf m Thanks for joining us. Our guest on
Speaker 1: this episode is Taylor Hunt, a devoted student and teacher
Speaker 1: of Oshtanga yoga. In two thousand twelve, Taylor founded the
Speaker 1: Morning My Sore Program in Columbus, Ohio to provide a
Speaker 1: community where students can learn Oshtanga yoga as it's traditionally taught.
Speaker 1: Taylor completes his practice during the early morning hours before
Speaker 1: teaching classes at Oshtanga Yoga Columbus or a y C.
Speaker 1: The community at a YC has built around a group
Speaker 1: of dedicated students who are improving their physical, mental, and
Speaker 1: spiritual health. His book is called Away from Darkness. Here's
Speaker 1: the interview. Hi Taylor, welcome to the show. Hi, thanks
Speaker 1: for having Eric. I'm excited to have you on a
Speaker 1: couple of reasons. One is we're getting to talk in person,
Speaker 1: which I always love. UM. And secondly, your book is
Speaker 1: a little bit like looking into a mirror for me.
Speaker 1: You know, your book is about your recovery from addiction.
Speaker 1: You did that here in Columbus, Ohio. Um. You know,
Speaker 1: we met each other in in the you know, in
Speaker 1: the recovery room. So reading your book a lot of it,
Speaker 1: I'm like, well, that sounds like me, and that sounds
Speaker 1: like me, and that sounds like me. So I'm really
Speaker 1: excited to get into the book. And we'll, uh, we'll
Speaker 1: talk more about that in a second. But let's start
Speaker 1: like we usually do with the parable. There's a grandfather's
Speaker 1: talking to his grandson. He says, in life, there are
Speaker 1: two wolves inside of us that are always at battle.
Speaker 1: One is a good wolf, which represents things like kindness
Speaker 1: and bravery and love, and the other is a bad wolf,
Speaker 1: which represents things like greed and hatred and fear. And
Speaker 1: the grandson stops and he thinks about it for a second.
Speaker 1: He looks up at his grandfather and he says, well, grandfather,
Speaker 1: which one wins. So I'd like to start off by
Speaker 1: asking you what that parable means to you in your
Speaker 1: life and in the work that you do. Wow. Um. Well, first,
Speaker 1: I'm honored to be on the show, So thanks for
Speaker 1: having me here. Um, I'm I'm grateful that this all
Speaker 1: came together as the parable. Um. For me, I feel
Speaker 1: like my life is that parable. Um. You know, for
Speaker 1: the longest time, like I lived in a place of
Speaker 1: I mean you could call it the gutter. Um literally
Speaker 1: like sticking anito in my arms NonStop. Um. I didn't
Speaker 1: like myself. I mean, the bad wolf was winning and
Speaker 1: he was a bad bad was a really bad wolf. Yeah. Um.
Speaker 1: And you know a couple of times, um as as
Speaker 1: a result of feeding the bad wolf. I mean, um,
Speaker 1: it almost took my life a few times. And um,
Speaker 1: you know, so I feel like the parable is kind
Speaker 1: of my life, you know, Like right now, I'm currently
Speaker 1: feeding the good wolf um and living, you know, living
Speaker 1: in the principles of what the good wolf has so um.
Speaker 1: So yeah, I've heard that parable before and and it
Speaker 1: it definitely speaks to me, just especially where I'm at
Speaker 1: right now too. I couldn't tell you exactly when, but
Speaker 1: I'm sure I heard it in recovery, and it's I
Speaker 1: think it's one of those that you know in recovery
Speaker 1: is I think everybody hears it and relates with it.
Speaker 1: But I think if you've battled addiction to the extent
Speaker 1: that that you have or I have, there's a there's
Speaker 1: a particular poignancy to it about like whoa, this is
Speaker 1: really very serious. Also, like and you know this obviously,
Speaker 1: but like at a certain point, you're feeding the bad
Speaker 1: wolf so much that you don't even know that there's
Speaker 1: another wolf's right, Yeah, I mean it just takes over
Speaker 1: the whole takes over the whole equation, takes over your
Speaker 1: whole life. Um, and there it's almost an impossible way
Speaker 1: to get out. I mean, that's why there's so much
Speaker 1: hopelessness when that comes to addiction and getting into recovery.
Speaker 1: It is very hard. Your book is called Away from Darkness,
Speaker 1: My story of addiction, recovery, and yoga. So I don't
Speaker 1: want to spend a ton of time on the first
Speaker 1: part of that. The addiction part you certainly in the
Speaker 1: book go into a great deal of detail. It's a
Speaker 1: really powerful story for listeners. It would suffice to say
Speaker 1: you pretty much went about as low as you want
Speaker 1: to go, right, You don't, you don't, I mean, there's
Speaker 1: not much left after that. I think certainly I can
Speaker 1: relate with that. Like I said, so much of that
Speaker 1: story I was like, yep, yep, yep. You know, like
Speaker 1: I've been there. You know, if you're doing a drug
Speaker 1: like heroine in a city like Columbus, you're gonna come
Speaker 1: across the same sort of places, the same sort of things, um,
Speaker 1: the same sort of desperation, you know, the overdoses, this
Speaker 1: the whole mess of it. Um. And So what I
Speaker 1: think is particularly interested in what I want to focus
Speaker 1: on is the second two parts of your subtitle, which
Speaker 1: is really the recovery and the yoga part, one of
Speaker 1: the things that you talk about in the book. At
Speaker 1: one point I thought this was a really interesting thing
Speaker 1: because it's something that, um, I think about a lot,
Speaker 1: and I think everybody thinks about a lot, but we
Speaker 1: don't talk much about in twelve step recovery. And what
Speaker 1: what you said was, I had to figure out how
Speaker 1: much involvement in the program is needed for you to
Speaker 1: stay sober. And I think that's a I think we
Speaker 1: all need different amounts of the program, and I think
Speaker 1: we all need different amounts at different points in our recovery.
Speaker 1: I think it's interesting, though, that we don't talk about
Speaker 1: that very much. It tends to be very much you
Speaker 1: should just go all the time, and that should be everything, right,
Speaker 1: and and uh, and clearly you've chosen a different route.
Speaker 1: And what I'm interesting because I've chosen a different route
Speaker 1: a little bit too, where the amount that I go
Speaker 1: to meetings varies. What I'm interested in is what do
Speaker 1: you think you're getting from those other parts of your
Speaker 1: life that allow you to maybe not have to go
Speaker 1: to meetings as often, Because I don't think recovery only
Speaker 1: happens in a meeting, right, It definitely just doesn't happen
Speaker 1: in meetings, I mean, and honestly, like in the in
Speaker 1: the meetings or the rooms. Um, there's this saying that
Speaker 1: meeting makers make it, and I like, I know that's
Speaker 1: not always true, um, you know, like living the program,
Speaker 1: living the steps UM and honestly taking like a true
Speaker 1: inventory of of who you are on a consistent basis,
Speaker 1: and like not telling ourselves a lie. I mean, because
Speaker 1: alcoholism and drug addiction is a disease of denial. So yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm how I came up with the equation
Speaker 1: that I came up with is you know, based on
Speaker 1: like really my yoga experience. You know, I got a
Speaker 1: true picture in the mirror every single day that I
Speaker 1: made it to my mat and I started realizing that
Speaker 1: I was able to apply these these steps and I
Speaker 1: was able to like show up and do my medain
Speaker 1: ation UM every morning, and it and it kind of
Speaker 1: translated right into um, me taking care of myself the
Speaker 1: way that I needed to ye. For me, I look
Speaker 1: at it. You know, the recovery literature talks about the
Speaker 1: importance of a spiritual connection spiritual condition UM, and I
Speaker 1: think we all have different perceptions of what that looks like.
Speaker 1: You know, certainly for me, I'm probably more agnostic than
Speaker 1: anything else. So for me, though, I still think that
Speaker 1: the heart of it is that it's the spiritual connection.
Speaker 1: And I think you could almost go the word spiritual
Speaker 1: is so nebulous that I think you could almost just
Speaker 1: go to connection. And so for me, the amount that
Speaker 1: I need to be in the program, I think has
Speaker 1: a lot to do with how connected I am to
Speaker 1: my life, to myself, to the people around me, to
Speaker 1: the spiritual practices I do. And when I've got that connection,
Speaker 1: I feel all right and I'm I'm okay. A lot
Speaker 1: of meetings are not a lot of means, And if
Speaker 1: I don't have that, then meetings become imperative because I'm
Speaker 1: in really rocky, rocky ground. Owned sure. I mean I
Speaker 1: feel the exact same way. Actually, um that connection, I mean,
Speaker 1: I find it in my yoga practice, you know, so
Speaker 1: showing up on a daily basis and and finding that
Speaker 1: connection and really tuning into what's going on with me
Speaker 1: because I never really paid attention to anything that was
Speaker 1: going on. And then all of a sudden, like you know,
Speaker 1: you come into the rooms and you start like working
Speaker 1: the steps or living the steps, and then all of
Speaker 1: a sudden, it's like, oh yeah, like there's something going
Speaker 1: on with me, Like why am I acting angry? Um
Speaker 1: where you know, all of a sudden, like I was
Speaker 1: paying attention to it um and and understanding it too.
Speaker 1: So yea. And so your journey has been you know,
Speaker 1: came into a A got sober and then one of
Speaker 1: my if I was supposed to say a there, but
Speaker 1: I did traditions, traditions anyway, you came into recovery, you
Speaker 1: got sober, and then yoga became a huge part of
Speaker 1: your life. So you are a yoga teacher at this point,
Speaker 1: a a yoga teacher in a long lineage. You've been
Speaker 1: to India several times, You've got your own yoga studio,
Speaker 1: You've got a great community built here. And I'm interested
Speaker 1: in Yoga is on one hand, a set of poses.
Speaker 1: It's a physical practice. Yet I know there's so much
Speaker 1: more to it. And I hear people like you say,
Speaker 1: you know, on my mat, I discovered X, Y and Z.
Speaker 1: Walk me through that a little bit. What does that,
Speaker 1: how does that happen and and what's that correlation? Because
Speaker 1: I'll say, for me, you know, I've practiced it semi
Speaker 1: regularly but not probably in in a lot of the
Speaker 1: right settings and different things. But for me, it feels
Speaker 1: very much like a physical pose thing. And so I'm
Speaker 1: kind of curious how you open to that next level
Speaker 1: of it what that process is like, Yeah, I mean
Speaker 1: the process always starts very physical. I mean I think
Speaker 1: people show up as a result of like wanting like
Speaker 1: some sort of physical exercise. I mean that that that
Speaker 1: is part of the equation and the reason why we
Speaker 1: do like the posters is because of that tangible quality
Speaker 1: of like what the aspect of yoga gives you. Um,
Speaker 1: you can you can kind of feel it in your body,
Speaker 1: but I mean deep down, I mean it's a set
Speaker 1: of moral principles um, similar to like you know the
Speaker 1: recovery rooms, you know, treating people nonviolent, being truthful, and
Speaker 1: you know down the line of cleanliness, those kind of things,
Speaker 1: and so um, I mean the transformation or or how
Speaker 1: to get the other aspects out of yoga UM comes
Speaker 1: from a daily commitment like showing up on your mat
Speaker 1: and you know, it's very physical, and then all of
Speaker 1: a sudden, like you start understanding that your mat is
Speaker 1: a laboratory for a continuous experiment over and over and
Speaker 1: over and you get true reflections of who you are.
Speaker 1: And so you know, some days, because of my lack
Speaker 1: of awareness about myself, some days I would show up
Speaker 1: and like not actually know that I was angry like
Speaker 1: I was just talking about. But nowadays, like I can
Speaker 1: pinpoint what's actually happening in in my body, and um,
Speaker 1: I can pinpoint what's happening in my head. And now
Speaker 1: I have like a really good look at myself. And
Speaker 1: that's not to mention like all of the less that
Speaker 1: are actually learned on my mat too, from like certain
Speaker 1: times where you could say, like I didn't believe in
Speaker 1: myself or I thought it was like a you know,
Speaker 1: a piece of crap or something like that because of
Speaker 1: my addiction. And what I realized is that through the
Speaker 1: practice like doing the same thing over and over like
Speaker 1: a ritual. Um, what I've found is is that as
Speaker 1: I get better at it, um also self esteem gets
Speaker 1: better as a result of it. And so there's things
Speaker 1: like when I walk in like you you can't actually
Speaker 1: do you know, like you really even forward folding. It's
Speaker 1: like you can't. Yeah, I mean I couldn't touch my toes. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean so if you read the book, I mean
Speaker 1: I couldn't touch my toes on the first day. But
Speaker 1: then you get to a point where you you start
Speaker 1: to actually see like big strides, like you're taking big leaps,
Speaker 1: like continent to continent um of these huge like mind
Speaker 1: blowing like oh yeah, wait a second. It wasn't that
Speaker 1: I couldn't do it. It was just that I needed
Speaker 1: more time on it, and that I didn't actually believe
Speaker 1: in myself that I could do it. Because mind like
Speaker 1: state of mind or or intention maybe too, UM is
Speaker 1: super important when it comes to yoga, like UM. So
Speaker 1: if I nowadays, like if I think I can't do it,
Speaker 1: I can. But you know, if I can go to
Speaker 1: a place of UM, I can, or I can go
Speaker 1: to a place of like this is instead of an
Speaker 1: if it's a it's a win. Yeah, and that all
Speaker 1: a sudden translates into UM, you know, self empowerment, knowing myself.
Speaker 1: That's that. You know. We talked on the show. We
Speaker 1: had Carol dweck On who talked about the fixed versus
Speaker 1: the growth mindset. You know, fixed mindset is I can't
Speaker 1: touch my toes. I'm not a flexible person. I'll never
Speaker 1: be able to touch my toes. The growth mindset is
Speaker 1: if I keep working at this, I know I can
Speaker 1: get better at it. You know, I want to read
Speaker 1: a section from your book that I thought talked about
Speaker 1: this very much and you kind of it hits this
Speaker 1: partner that was well written. You say, yoga is the
Speaker 1: process of deconstructing all the bullshit that's in our heads.
Speaker 1: It pulled me out of the belief that I wasn't
Speaker 1: good enough and wasn't a good person. The false stories
Speaker 1: are not the same for everyone. I'm too fat, I'm
Speaker 1: not smart enough, no one could possibly love me. They
Speaker 1: aren't all negative either. Sometimes they're grandiose. I'm so much
Speaker 1: better than these people. Everyone is jealous of me, my
Speaker 1: ideas of the best. Yoga helps us to eliminate those
Speaker 1: thoughts and get in touch with our deeper cells. That's simplification.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's like simplifying your life. Yeah, And so
Speaker 1: part of it, you say, sounds like you are pushing
Speaker 1: up against your limits. So you're out there on the mat,
Speaker 1: You're pushing up against your limits, You're pushing through things
Speaker 1: that are difficult, You're you're gaining confidence by doing that.
Speaker 1: And then it sounds like there is something deeper that
Speaker 1: also happens. I'm you know a lot of people talk
Speaker 1: about emotions being stored in the body. Do you find
Speaker 1: that to be part of what the yoga practice brings
Speaker 1: and helps you with. Yeah. I mean, for sure, you know,
Speaker 1: every time that you experience, UM, happiness or depression or
Speaker 1: you know, any range of emotions. UM, it's a chemical
Speaker 1: reaction in the body. And so if it's not eliminated
Speaker 1: or if it's not dealt with and then discarded, we
Speaker 1: get stored in our tissues and so on the yoga
Speaker 1: mat because we're kind of like twisting and heating the
Speaker 1: body and moving and all of this stuff. Like, Yeah,
Speaker 1: it has a tendency to bring latent emotions in our
Speaker 1: in our body that are that are stored up there,
Speaker 1: and it's a way to process them too. I don't know,
Speaker 1: I always know what they're about, UM, sometimes I do,
Speaker 1: Like sometimes it's childhood stuff, or sometimes it's UM, you know,
Speaker 1: it's just sometimes it's deep down that I just don't
Speaker 1: like myself UM, or I struggle with um, you know,
Speaker 1: the concept of of actual love UM for myself. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but that shows up on the map for sure. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Why don't you tell people about the style of yoga
Speaker 1: that you teach, because it's very different than what most
Speaker 1: of us have been exposed to. Most people, when we
Speaker 1: think of yoga, we go to a class and an
Speaker 1: instructor leads us through a series of poses and we
Speaker 1: just go along with whatever that is and and and
Speaker 1: do that. What you do is very different. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: mean this is how they teach in India. Yeah. Um
Speaker 1: that I mean it was. It was given to me
Speaker 1: by a guru. His name is Shrot Joyce. Um he's
Speaker 1: one of the foremost yoga people in the world. Um
Speaker 1: he's my teacher. Um he's um, he's more or less
Speaker 1: showed me the ropes. So the style that I teach
Speaker 1: is called a stronger yoga. And the yoga is actually
Speaker 1: passed on from teacher to student, teacher to student. And um,
Speaker 1: how we teach we more or less like prescribe it
Speaker 1: instead of just hurting people along and in like a
Speaker 1: regular yoga class like you would experience that you know,
Speaker 1: the gym or whatever and so um, and what happens
Speaker 1: is is like most people feel like, um, yoga is
Speaker 1: a little bit unattainable or at least the poses are
Speaker 1: a little bit unattainable when they go to the gym
Speaker 1: class because the teachers not necessarily giving them one on
Speaker 1: one feedback. But in our classes, like the thing that
Speaker 1: we do is is all of the feedback goes specifically
Speaker 1: to you. UM, so we're not telling everyone in the room.
Speaker 1: We're just telling you which people can get really good
Speaker 1: at at doing yoga practice is really fast, um, just
Speaker 1: based on just getting that feedback, I mean, because I
Speaker 1: think everyone's kind of like looking to do it safe,
Speaker 1: looking to do it very deliberate, and and then also
Speaker 1: like create independence where our style is typically um, we
Speaker 1: create independence because we're not actually guiding you along all
Speaker 1: the way. It's one on one UM teacher and student
Speaker 1: are trying to figure out like what your yoga practice
Speaker 1: is supposed to look like. So what's happening is walk
Speaker 1: into your studio and there's fifteen people practicing yoga and
Speaker 1: they're all working on the same series, but they're all
Speaker 1: doing it at their own pace. So what you see
Speaker 1: is this person's do you know, doing these poses and
Speaker 1: working through it in another person. So everybody's going at
Speaker 1: their own pace. But I found really most interesting about
Speaker 1: that to me was breath is such an important part.
Speaker 1: What I find hard in instructor led classes is the
Speaker 1: breath piece because I'm going at the pace they have
Speaker 1: not necessarily the pace that my breath wants to go
Speaker 1: with or that I want to be with and and
Speaker 1: what you do. I feel like it's a lot easier
Speaker 1: for me to really connect with the breath and do
Speaker 1: the poses in the way they're supposed to be done
Speaker 1: because I can go at my own pace. That made
Speaker 1: a big difference for me in doing that. It was
Speaker 1: a big thing I noticed was that I was able
Speaker 1: to get much closer to that ideal in that case.
Speaker 1: I think it's the safer way too. Yeah, you know,
Speaker 1: to go at your own pace. Um, I think that
Speaker 1: it becomes a really you can get really sturdy at it,
Speaker 1: um instead of it being like it's overwhelming you on
Speaker 1: a on a daily basis, because sometimes they feel like
Speaker 1: fitness classes, yoga and and really the yoga that I
Speaker 1: teach is actually more of like a spiritual connection with
Speaker 1: yourself that we're teaching and and it just happens to
Speaker 1: be like, um, you know how we're doing it on
Speaker 1: our yoga mat So, and how do you work with
Speaker 1: students on is their instruction you give them on discovering
Speaker 1: that deeper spiritual path or does it come by being
Speaker 1: attentive and being focused on the poses? How how do
Speaker 1: you teach that? It first starts by observing what the
Speaker 1: person is dealing with, um, And and from a bird's
Speaker 1: eye view in the room, you can pretty much get
Speaker 1: a handle on like what the person is actually going through, um,
Speaker 1: whether it's psychological or whether it's actual physical pain, or
Speaker 1: whether it's like an emotional trauma. Um. Yeah. So so
Speaker 1: getting them to that deeper aspect starts at observation, that's first, um.
Speaker 1: But then to to get them to maybe find the
Speaker 1: deeper aspects of yoga. For example, if I'm going to
Speaker 1: teach them how to do a posture, if the first
Speaker 1: place that they go to is that they're going to
Speaker 1: beat themselves up over not doing it perfect, um, there's
Speaker 1: a certain strategy to teach that kind of person. And
Speaker 1: then there's also a certain strategy to teach like a
Speaker 1: perfectionist or someone who's lazy as well. UM, where some
Speaker 1: people need almost like olive branch when you're teaching them
Speaker 1: almost like a peaceful method or encouraging method, where other
Speaker 1: other people might need, um, like the tip of a
Speaker 1: band at you know how, where you're kind of putting
Speaker 1: putting pressure. Yeah. And so from that bird's eye view
Speaker 1: of being the teacher in the room, you can kind
Speaker 1: of see what strategy might help them the most, because
Speaker 1: I truly believe at the end of the day, if
Speaker 1: we can get them focused on their map for an
Speaker 1: hour or thirty minutes or however long they're they're in there,
Speaker 1: that connection with the breath and and really taking a
Speaker 1: look inside can translated into their lives. I mean, it
Speaker 1: translates as empowerment. I mean that's what it has done
Speaker 1: for me, um by having that connection on a daily basis,
Speaker 1: because we don't have enough time in silence, like as
Speaker 1: a society, we don't have enough time and um, we
Speaker 1: don't have enough quiet time. Yep. That's the other thing
Speaker 1: that's really nice about the type of yoga that you
Speaker 1: teach is it's very quiet and there's not anybody barking
Speaker 1: out like do this, do that. It's just a very
Speaker 1: quiet you know. It's it's peaceful in a way that
Speaker 1: other yoga classes I'm and I'm not saying that other
Speaker 1: yoga I'm not making I'm just talking about my own
Speaker 1: experience of what it was like my experiences, it was
Speaker 1: more quiet. I was more able to be inwardly focused
Speaker 1: again because I think it's quiet in the room and
Speaker 1: I'm not following a particular fast sequence, and I kind
Speaker 1: of know what I'm doing. You teach a couple of poses,
Speaker 1: and you work on those, and you learn a couple
Speaker 1: more than you learn a couple more, and slowly your
Speaker 1: practice grows and grows and grows versus a wide variety
Speaker 1: of different poses. And I think everybody would would like
Speaker 1: their own thing, but I really I really find it
Speaker 1: be UM more meditative for sure. Yeah, there's definitely an
Speaker 1: internal quality to what is happening, where like when they're
Speaker 1: barking orders or they're yelling at people or um. And
Speaker 1: there's times where I do that too, but I never
Speaker 1: play music. That is one thing, UM, but there is uh,
Speaker 1: there's a certain quality that um it's internal the whole practice.
Speaker 1: And and then you know, because everything that happens external
Speaker 1: if they put music on or or you know, they
Speaker 1: enjoy having music, whether yoga, it's an external you know it.
Speaker 1: There's word association that goes along with that. And then
Speaker 1: all of a sudden, like you know, someone says something
Speaker 1: on the song and then all of a sudden, like
Speaker 1: you go on the last time you heard it, and
Speaker 1: you know you're down the rabbit hole. I think it's
Speaker 1: easier to not compare because not everybody in the room
Speaker 1: is doing the same pose at the same time, right,
Speaker 1: Because when you're all doing the same pose, it's very
Speaker 1: easy to be looking around going well, okay, I'm the
Speaker 1: worst here, you know, I clearly am the one that
Speaker 1: cannot you know, whereas it with what you're doing, everybody's
Speaker 1: kind of in their own place. I mean, it's not
Speaker 1: that you don't notice some people and you're like, that
Speaker 1: person is really good, but it's just a less direct
Speaker 1: you know. Again, it helps to point towards the internal Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: for sure. I mean it is, uh, it's like almost
Speaker 1: a less competitive environment, um, where it's really for for you.
Speaker 1: But I mean the one thing that I always point
Speaker 1: out too is that UM, in our room, like we
Speaker 1: never give the queue, like look to your neighbor. And
Speaker 1: I feel like in other yoga styles, UM, one of
Speaker 1: the best things about our yoga styles, like we don't
Speaker 1: actually want to want you to look at your neighbors, Matt,
Speaker 1: we don't want you to judge your insides with their outsides.
Speaker 1: And I'm sure you've heard that before. Yeah, that's a
Speaker 1: great phrase. There's a touching part in your book. So
Speaker 1: you go along and you get very interested in yoga,
Speaker 1: and you get this desire that you want to go
Speaker 1: to India, and yet you've got a job, You've got
Speaker 1: a kid, you've got all these responsibilities, and your your
Speaker 1: job is with your your father. So it's looking sort
Speaker 1: of you know, it's the sort of thing that we
Speaker 1: all do, like, yeah, I'd love to do that, but
Speaker 1: there's no way, right And yet you kind of just
Speaker 1: you kind of just happed working. And what I thought
Speaker 1: was there were a couple of things out of that
Speaker 1: lesson I thought was really important. One was when you
Speaker 1: went and asked the people in your life and told
Speaker 1: him what was important to you. They were a lot
Speaker 1: more willing to work with you than you thought, and
Speaker 1: so hey, I think that's an important lesson. And the
Speaker 1: touching part is when you go to your father. Do
Speaker 1: you wanna tell me what happened when you went to
Speaker 1: your father with this? Yeah? I mean that's like one
Speaker 1: of the best stories in the book. I mean, actually
Speaker 1: gives me chills. I just got chills. Um. You know,
Speaker 1: so my dad is like kind of like, uh, you know,
Speaker 1: a little bit of an uptype business man. You know,
Speaker 1: he's kind of um shrewd in certain ways of business.
Speaker 1: And and I remember I got back from this trip
Speaker 1: um to visiting um Shrod Joyce, the guy who I
Speaker 1: told you about just a little bit earlier. That's my
Speaker 1: teacher now. And I visited him and and I came
Speaker 1: back and I was like, you know, I sit down
Speaker 1: with my dad and I was nervous, right too, Like
Speaker 1: I mean, I was sweating ballads and not the kind
Speaker 1: of guy who's in for yoga trips to India, right,
Speaker 1: that's not in his worldview, I mean, and especially because
Speaker 1: like I was almost doing a living amend's to him
Speaker 1: by working, might be good at what you do and
Speaker 1: hold responsibilities and exactly. Um. And so I'm sitting down
Speaker 1: with him, and I'm like sweating bullets and I'm like, hey,
Speaker 1: you know, this is like really nervous, you know, like
Speaker 1: I'm really nervous. And and I said, Dad, you know,
Speaker 1: like I went and visited this guy in in New York,
Speaker 1: and I'm thinking about going to my Surendia and I
Speaker 1: you know, kind of need your blessing. And I'm thinking,
Speaker 1: for sure he's going to say no. Um. And and
Speaker 1: at least the story in my head said that my
Speaker 1: dad wasn't supportive of this journey. Um, I mean that
Speaker 1: was the bullshit story in my head really, and so um,
Speaker 1: he looked me dead in the eyes and he said,
Speaker 1: if you don't go, you'll regret it for the rest
Speaker 1: of your life. And I was like, who is this guy?
Speaker 1: I don't know. I mean, that's just not how my
Speaker 1: dad shows up. But then he went on to you know,
Speaker 1: talk about like how he's kind of watched me get
Speaker 1: sober and he's watched me take interest in yoga and
Speaker 1: and um, it was the time where it was like
Speaker 1: the universe, if you want to call it that UM
Speaker 1: conspired to really you know, put an angel in front
Speaker 1: of me where it's like, yeah, you're doing the right thing.
Speaker 1: If you're doing the right thing, and keep asking um,
Speaker 1: and you'll keep receiving. Yeah, And that's what. Yeah, Like
Speaker 1: I said, I thought that there were the two parts
Speaker 1: of that. One was the I think we all sell
Speaker 1: ourselves short with what we can do in life because
Speaker 1: we put limitations in place that aren't necessarily there, or
Speaker 1: if they are there, there's ways around them if we're
Speaker 1: courageous and persistent. And so the story really showed that.
Speaker 1: And you know, your dad's saying that just is so tough.
Speaker 1: You know, it's like that moment of like you just
Speaker 1: see parental love like really come through in a genuine way.
Speaker 1: It's a beautiful story. Yeah, it was pivotal in my
Speaker 1: life because um I was kind of unsure where my
Speaker 1: dad actually stood with everything that I was doing and
Speaker 1: and it felt like he had my back and and
Speaker 1: it it kind of renewed our whole relationship as a
Speaker 1: result of he supported every trip since then. Yeah, he
Speaker 1: didn't think you were a whacko for a week ago
Speaker 1: to Indian New York, and I thought he was actually
Speaker 1: gonna do I say and do all of that stuff exactly,
Speaker 1: And it showed up much different. It showed up his love.
Speaker 1: You have a saying that has gone with your yoga
Speaker 1: community since you started, as you know, in part of
Speaker 1: another studio. You built this this community and then you've
Speaker 1: gone out on your own and uh, it's bring your
Speaker 1: ass to class. Tell me why that's so important for
Speaker 1: what you guys do, because it only works if you
Speaker 1: show up. You know. It started based on UM I
Speaker 1: was in a class one time, Eric and and someone
Speaker 1: said to me, um I hope you come back, And
Speaker 1: um I was in like customer service, and I was
Speaker 1: in sales and and I literally thought in my head
Speaker 1: as he said, I hope you come back, I was like,
Speaker 1: it would have been better for you to tell me
Speaker 1: to come back than to hope that I was going
Speaker 1: to come back. I mean that that was the line
Speaker 1: of thought that went through my head. And I was like,
Speaker 1: from now on, like say what you mean. And so
Speaker 1: when I was teaching, I wanted these people to come
Speaker 1: back because I mean, I was seeing all of this growth.
Speaker 1: I mean I was seeing like huge amounts of growth
Speaker 1: in my personal and um, you know, my business career
Speaker 1: and all all of that stuff or yoga career, and um,
Speaker 1: I was seeing all this growth and I wanted other
Speaker 1: people to have it too. And so I mean it
Speaker 1: only works. And and really the commitment to showing up
Speaker 1: on a daily basis or maybe it's every other day
Speaker 1: or whatever, UM is the hardest part. It's like plan
Speaker 1: in the plan and not the results. It's like the
Speaker 1: plan is is that I'm going to bring my ass
Speaker 1: to class and show up at the top of my map. UM.
Speaker 1: But after that it doesn't matter, Like it doesn't matter.
Speaker 1: I'm not trying to put on a performance. I'm not
Speaker 1: here for someone else. I'm actually here for myself and
Speaker 1: that and that like kind of goes along with all
Speaker 1: of that saying, I mean that's what we that's what
Speaker 1: we preach, Like how do you get committed to something? Um?
Speaker 1: And how do you get disciplined? Because I mean as
Speaker 1: a whole, we're not disciplined and today I'm very disciplined.
Speaker 1: And you say in the book, and this is something
Speaker 1: when I'm talking with people about meditation, I say something
Speaker 1: very similar. You say, you know, it's not a good
Speaker 1: practice or a bad practice. If you did it, you succeed,
Speaker 1: you know. And I think that's so important with some
Speaker 1: of this stuff is people get can get really hung
Speaker 1: up on you know, did I do good? Did I
Speaker 1: do bad? Was it a good day a bad day?
Speaker 1: And I think that my experience is if you're gonna
Speaker 1: do some sort of transformative practice, if you just keep
Speaker 1: doing it, transformation it happens. It's hard to watch day
Speaker 1: to day. You don't see it day to day. UM.
Speaker 1: But if there's this constant this was good, that was
Speaker 1: bad judgment, it makes it harder to keep doing it
Speaker 1: day to day. And thus then you don't see the
Speaker 1: transformation because you don't keep doing it right, you know,
Speaker 1: And I just think that's such a big like, you know,
Speaker 1: I always am like if I sat there for the
Speaker 1: amount of time I said I was going to sit there,
Speaker 1: that's a good meditation doesn't matter if if I'm thinking
Speaker 1: about cookies the whole time instead of thinking about meditation,
Speaker 1: I still was there. Yeah. I mean one of the
Speaker 1: things that um I've learned from my studies of like
Speaker 1: the yoga sutras is that there's really two qualities to
Speaker 1: to find yoga um or two qualities of like a
Speaker 1: practitioner that you need. And the first one is a
Speaker 1: consistent practice over a long period of time. And then
Speaker 1: also um non attachment. And so it goes along with
Speaker 1: everything that I just said, their practice, but practice without
Speaker 1: the attachment of like it's good or it's bad or
Speaker 1: or any of those things. Yeah, let's go back to discipline.
Speaker 1: That's usually a word that is not a fan favorite,
Speaker 1: so to speak. A lot of us have a negative
Speaker 1: you know, the word certainly has a sort of negative connotation,
Speaker 1: at least for a lot of people. Talk about why
Speaker 1: it's been so important to you and how you built
Speaker 1: that discipline because it's a long way from being a
Speaker 1: heroin addict who can't stop shoving needles in his arms
Speaker 1: to a guy who will get up at three am
Speaker 1: every morning to get his yoga practice in before he
Speaker 1: has to go teach other people. That's pretty remarkable. So
Speaker 1: I mean, obviously you're not gonna be able to summarize
Speaker 1: in two minutes how you made that transformation, but let's
Speaker 1: talk about why discipline is important and some thoughts you
Speaker 1: have about the path to it. I was so undisciplined
Speaker 1: that it was it was hard to it was hard
Speaker 1: to do anything as a result of being so undisciplined.
Speaker 1: And so what I started doing is like, um, you know,
Speaker 1: setting setting goals for myself and I and I started
Speaker 1: like um, once I started achieving the goals, I actually
Speaker 1: started like um, setting more goals and so UM. It
Speaker 1: became like almost achievement based in the beginning. And what
Speaker 1: it's done for me is is that it's given me
Speaker 1: like a framework, UM, where I can operate from. And
Speaker 1: I operate really well. I mean I'm a habit person. Um,
Speaker 1: you know, disease of alcoholism and drug addiction. I mean,
Speaker 1: set you up for a habit person. But the only
Speaker 1: discipline that I had when I was using was I
Speaker 1: was disciplined like called the drug dealer or do whatever
Speaker 1: it takes. Yeah, And so UM, I certainly had that
Speaker 1: quality of like do whatever it takes in order to
Speaker 1: make it to yoga class or or do a posture
Speaker 1: or any of that stuff. But the discipline specifically UM
Speaker 1: in in my practice today is more like a spiritual framework.
Speaker 1: And so I'm able to show up at the top
Speaker 1: of my mat and dedicate my practice to really the
Speaker 1: students that are going to show up after I get done.
Speaker 1: And UM, and it's also UM it holds me accountable
Speaker 1: to to a certain thing UM other people, which I
Speaker 1: think is important. And so as I'm as I'm practicing
Speaker 1: like I'm I'm actually doing the whole practice UM for
Speaker 1: another set of set of people, which I think, like
Speaker 1: deep down the spiritual discipline of like UM doing it
Speaker 1: for other people as is important. You say in the
Speaker 1: book that you did a lot of searching into different
Speaker 1: spiritual traditions as you came into recovery. You know there's
Speaker 1: a spiritual aspect of recovery. You started looking into a
Speaker 1: lot of things, and in the book you say you
Speaker 1: learned that interacting with others in a loving way is
Speaker 1: a common thread through all spiritual traditions. Yeah, and I
Speaker 1: found that through my yoga practice really, you know, on
Speaker 1: a daily basis. When I was working hard in there, um,
Speaker 1: you know, my heart was like encased in stone, you know.
Speaker 1: And so like, as I did this spiritual discipline every
Speaker 1: single day, like showing up and and um doing my
Speaker 1: morning prayers, which is what I like to call my
Speaker 1: my yoga practice. Actually it's like doing my morning prayers. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I was able to uncase my heart and and really
Speaker 1: like start to treat people, um with respect, and start
Speaker 1: to treat institutions with respect, and gained some self awareness
Speaker 1: about how I treat myself as well too. So I
Speaker 1: want to read another part from your book that I
Speaker 1: really liked. You say, I've learned not to listen to
Speaker 1: the stories in my head of the time. I no
Speaker 1: longer believe that thoughts compromise my identity. That was a
Speaker 1: huge discovery for me, and it may be the most
Speaker 1: important lesson I have to offer others about yoga. There
Speaker 1: is danger and identifying ourselves with our thoughts because it
Speaker 1: limits us. Our thoughts are not our reality. Our actions
Speaker 1: form our reality. And for me, yoga helps separate the
Speaker 1: bullshit stories I tell myself from what I am really
Speaker 1: supposed to do in the world. It's pretty good. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean, that's gonna have to mark the e on
Speaker 1: explicit for this for this episode. Now that we not
Speaker 1: our second bullshit in here, but we're good. That's maybe
Speaker 1: the cornerstone of my teaching right there, is that, Um,
Speaker 1: I no longer identify with the stories that I tell myself.
Speaker 1: They're still there. I mean, they're still there, and um,
Speaker 1: every once in a while, I mean I'm not perfect.
Speaker 1: I'm not a saying. I get pulled back into UM,
Speaker 1: you know that line of thinking from time to time,
Speaker 1: But it doesn't take long these days to to step
Speaker 1: outside of it. Um, it's a day instead of like
Speaker 1: months later where all of a sudden you got a
Speaker 1: bunch of resentments or you know, whatever comes up. But um,
Speaker 1: for the most part, I mean, that's what I do
Speaker 1: have to offer people. It's like that there's no the
Speaker 1: story there. There's been a separation from the story in
Speaker 1: my head or from like the condition pattern of living
Speaker 1: to what I'm actually capable of, like actions wise, UM,
Speaker 1: and that those are really two totally different things. And
Speaker 1: also by doing um certain actions over and over, UM,
Speaker 1: I feel better about myself and the stories actually change.
Speaker 1: It's that old Sometimes you can't think your way into
Speaker 1: right action. You gotta active thinking, exactly. I mean, that's
Speaker 1: that That is another thing I feel, um a place
Speaker 1: that I teach from for sure. That whole point in
Speaker 1: time when I was like writing that part of the book,
Speaker 1: it was all of these like kind of lessons like
Speaker 1: started coming up and and Sharon, I'm like, like, this
Speaker 1: has has been pretty cool because you start realizing that
Speaker 1: of us, Um, even normal people have the same exact things.
Speaker 1: We all have that internal you know, we talked about
Speaker 1: it on here all the time. We all have that
Speaker 1: internal narrator. And the amount of distance you can be
Speaker 1: put between that internal narrator and yourself is a pretty
Speaker 1: good guide to sanity and court health and peace of mind.
Speaker 1: Right if you can stop at least believing the stories,
Speaker 1: you know, because you're we're making it all up. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm not as bad as I say I am, and
Speaker 1: I'm also not as good as I say I am.
Speaker 1: Exactly Constantly I'm like telling myself and by practicing, you know,
Speaker 1: I've there's been like a separation and from the two
Speaker 1: where nowadays, like the stories in my head, I get
Speaker 1: to watch like movies that I don't actually get involved
Speaker 1: in anymore, and I get to know what whether it's
Speaker 1: bullshit or whether it's real or any of that stuff.
Speaker 1: So one of the things that I find inspiring about
Speaker 1: what you've done is that you have gone from somebody
Speaker 1: who has a regular, full time job and has kids
Speaker 1: and has responsibilities to somebody who's been able to kind
Speaker 1: of pursue their dreams. What I think is really interesting
Speaker 1: though about it is the way that you did it,
Speaker 1: because you didn't do it by suddenly deciding it was
Speaker 1: time to follow your passion and throw everything else to
Speaker 1: the wind. It wasn't a I've got to do my thing.
Speaker 1: You had responsibilities, and you built this community in this
Speaker 1: practice while you kept your other job, while you paid
Speaker 1: the bills, while you took care of the kids. And
Speaker 1: I think that's such an important lesson because I think
Speaker 1: that it's very easy to get stuck in well, if
Speaker 1: I can't do it full time, if I still have
Speaker 1: to do a job, then I can't do it, And
Speaker 1: so many people we don't get started because we think
Speaker 1: that's in our way. And I just love to see
Speaker 1: people who would make that transformation slowly over time that UM.
Speaker 1: I mean it took a lot of time. Actually, I
Speaker 1: mean it took six years of you know, NonStop working
Speaker 1: with my dad and and then realizing that I found
Speaker 1: found what my calling or my darma or my path
Speaker 1: or whatever. And so then I kind of almost systematically,
Speaker 1: UM laid the found foundation in order for me to
Speaker 1: UM to transfer my life over to it. I mean,
Speaker 1: I travel around the country. I'm able to provide for
Speaker 1: my family now just based off of yoga, which is
Speaker 1: um which is really cool. You know. I I don't
Speaker 1: actually work anymore. I just live. I just live my passion. UM.
Speaker 1: I gets traveled, and yeah, I get spend time with
Speaker 1: my kids. I watch my son every every afternoon and
Speaker 1: watch my daughter when she gets home from school. And
Speaker 1: and I think that's what people wanna actually want to
Speaker 1: be doing with their time, and I get to do it.
Speaker 1: And so like in the in the short term, like
Speaker 1: I put in a huge amount of investment, like like
Speaker 1: human investment, you know, like or time investment. I I
Speaker 1: was working sixty hours at my dad's job and then
Speaker 1: doing twenty hours of yoga, and and then I That's
Speaker 1: why I started practicing really early in the morning too,
Speaker 1: because its the only time I could fit it in,
Speaker 1: and and I was getting so much benefits from from
Speaker 1: practicing that I was like, oh, I can't, I mean,
Speaker 1: I can't not practice, and that would that would be crazy.
Speaker 1: So then I started practice at three am, and people
Speaker 1: thought it was crazy for that too, but um, I couldn't.
Speaker 1: I couldn't back away from it. So I was doing
Speaker 1: and then I you know, I was teaching you know,
Speaker 1: twenty hours a week too, and so um, for for
Speaker 1: a short time there, I was I was kind of
Speaker 1: going crazy because it was so much work. Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean I'm in the midst of that transition, you
Speaker 1: know as we speak now, and so yeah, it's it's
Speaker 1: it's a lot of work to to have a full
Speaker 1: time you know or beyond full time job depending or
Speaker 1: you know, consulting work and then you know, do something.
Speaker 1: But what I like about it is it takes the
Speaker 1: excuses away. Right. It's not easy, and it's really hard,
Speaker 1: but at least allows us to take a real look
Speaker 1: at like, Okay, if I want to do this, there's
Speaker 1: a path. You know. The path is long, it's going
Speaker 1: to take a lot of work. I'm gonna watch a
Speaker 1: lot less TV. I might spend less time with my friends.
Speaker 1: I'm I'm gonna give things up. I'm gonna make sacrifices,
Speaker 1: but I can do it if that's what's important to me,
Speaker 1: and that's what I find inspiring about it. I literally
Speaker 1: looked at my life and I was like, I want
Speaker 1: something different. I'm gonna systematically, like work towards a specific goal.
Speaker 1: And and one of the things to help me the
Speaker 1: most is is really the community that that started to
Speaker 1: surround me too. Um So as as I started attracting
Speaker 1: people that were like me, um that I could identify
Speaker 1: and we talked about connection, and um I found that
Speaker 1: connection and and then all of a sudden, like the
Speaker 1: fire became even more. It's like, oh, yeah, there are
Speaker 1: people like me that are searching for a better way
Speaker 1: to live, and you know, and they were all working hard,
Speaker 1: and they were all passionate about what they were doing.
Speaker 1: I mean some of them were living their dreams too,
Speaker 1: and so being witnessed to that was pretty pretty awesome too.
Speaker 1: It's really inspiring. And I'm really you know, congratulate you
Speaker 1: on your success. I think I remember seeing you come
Speaker 1: into recovery right and you know again, it's the transformation
Speaker 1: is stunning to sit here and kind of look at
Speaker 1: you now and and think about you know, back then.
Speaker 1: So thank congratulations, Yeah, well, thank you so much for
Speaker 1: coming on. It's been a pleasure. Um, I'm really glad
Speaker 1: we have gotten to do this and uh, best of luck,
Speaker 1: Thanks Eric, take care. You can learn more about Taylor
Speaker 1: Hunt and this podcast at one new feed dot ned
Speaker 1: slash Taylor