Speaker 1: Do you ever think about the white version of yourself?
Speaker 1: You're like, I'm successful, but if I was white, I'd
Speaker 1: be over the moon. And I'm like, if I was white,
Speaker 1: I'd be sucking. J J. Abrams like like, people like
Speaker 1: you're successful, You're doing great. I'm like, do you know
Speaker 1: the insurmountable seeming odds I had to be here? Man,
Speaker 1: I'm sucking. I'm Macdonna, nigga. What are you talking about?
Speaker 1: All right? You know, you know I want to imagine
Speaker 1: clover Field monsters too, but black got in the way. Yeah, man, Yeah,
Speaker 1: mans racist, mostly mostly money actually stuff I can't tell me. Yeah. Welcome,
Speaker 1: ladies and gentleman to another spectacular episode of My Mama
Speaker 1: Told Me the podcast where we died deep deep into
Speaker 1: the world of black conspiracy theories, and we proved that
Speaker 1: Terry Crews killed Michael Clark Duncan so that he could
Speaker 1: take over the big buff black man position in Hollywood.
Speaker 1: Michael Clark Duncan had it all. He was the only
Speaker 1: buff black man we needed, and then suddenly his heart
Speaker 1: exploded in a tragic heart explosion accident. I don't know
Speaker 1: how he died, and then we got stuck with Terry's
Speaker 1: goofy ends, and I know that this was all just
Speaker 1: a big, sinister plan that Terry cooked up to get
Speaker 1: rid of Michael Clark Duncan. He was sitting there building
Speaker 1: up his titty meet and planning against Michael Clark Duncan.
Speaker 1: And now we're stuck with this motherfucker who is comfortable
Speaker 1: going on America's got talent and shucking and driving for
Speaker 1: Simon Cowell. Awe, I'm your host, Langston Kerman. I'm accusing
Speaker 1: Terry Crews of many things, and I'm excited to be here.
Speaker 1: We have a hell of an episode ahead of you.
Speaker 1: My guest today has been walking around more than most
Speaker 1: guests I think I've ever been on the podcast with.
Speaker 1: He journeyed into his kitchen. He's now making his way
Speaker 1: back to a quiet area in his own I'm so
Speaker 1: excited he's here. He's a dear friend. He's a hilarious comedian.
Speaker 1: You know him from his work on Comedy Central. You
Speaker 1: know him from writing on Mrs Mazel, you know him
Speaker 1: from writing on Fucking Atlanta. He's so funny, so great.
Speaker 1: Give it up from my friend Mr Jordan's Temple. Everybody,
Speaker 1: how my guy, Hey, I'm I'm blessed, highly favorite. How
Speaker 1: are you saying, Man, they ain't get me yet. Maybe tomorrow,
Speaker 1: maybe the next day, but at this exact moment, they
Speaker 1: didn't get me. Who's day, man, non gender conforming police officer. Sure,
Speaker 1: gender is not the factor here. It's the police that's
Speaker 1: that's the issue. That make sure you get them pronouns
Speaker 1: right before they shoot you. You know what I'm saying,
Speaker 1: You don't want to disrespect, you gotta keep it tight.
Speaker 1: I love that. Well. I'm excited today because you came
Speaker 1: to me with I would say conspiracy theory that remains
Speaker 1: sort of a constant argument, a constant issue in the
Speaker 1: black community at almost all times. But you said, now,
Speaker 1: I want to get this right. My mama told me
Speaker 1: black people have an extra leg tendom to help them
Speaker 1: run faster and jump higher. Yes, tell me more, dig in,
Speaker 1: let's do it. Well, you know, you know me. My
Speaker 1: life is in shambles. Um, sure, so stop ragging and
Speaker 1: get to the conversation. I'm not generally not right now,
Speaker 1: but you know, the successes is complete opposite of what
Speaker 1: my life has been up to before this point. So
Speaker 1: you know, when I was in my first community college,
Speaker 1: I went to when I was in my first community
Speaker 1: when I was on my first tour, community collegiates, Yes,
Speaker 1: community collegiates. I was on a community college baseball team,
Speaker 1: third Division, Great times and the onon Dogga Lasers l
Speaker 1: A Z E r S. After our practice we were
Speaker 1: having in the gym because you know, it's too cold
Speaker 1: for us to play baseball up state up State New
Speaker 1: York and a dogar in Syracuse and like we we
Speaker 1: had indoor baseball team. Now we we just played like this, Yeah,
Speaker 1: we just need a human door man. We start hitting good,
Speaker 1: put your squeaky shoes on. We didn't go outside today, fellas, Yeah,
Speaker 1: not today. We are We're a basketball team, fucking man.
Speaker 1: I was. I was mostly riding the bench, but I
Speaker 1: was It felt like a fitness class generally because I
Speaker 1: was so bad. But one day my boy were riding
Speaker 1: up back to the little dorms and we were sitting
Speaker 1: in his car smoking a cigarette and he's like, I
Speaker 1: got something to ask you, man. You're my friend, right,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, yeah, your friend Jeremy whatever. And he
Speaker 1: was like, uh so, huge red flag and he's like
Speaker 1: he's like, do black people have an extra tending? An
Speaker 1: extra leg tending, And I was like, what would bring
Speaker 1: you to ask you that? You know? Because they're just faster,
Speaker 1: better everything. I'm like, we are in the same Division
Speaker 1: three community college baseball team, Sir, whatever extra tending you
Speaker 1: think black people have, I didn't get it. I'm here
Speaker 1: with you. Yeah, that's the craziest ship. I've always heard
Speaker 1: that generally, you know, people like does it come from slavery?
Speaker 1: Does it come from this? Doesn't come from that. It
Speaker 1: was always confusing to me because it's like the reality
Speaker 1: didn't match the stereotype. Like some you could have an
Speaker 1: example or something, but I don't know. Well, I I
Speaker 1: love that he asked you this because it's such a ridiculous.
Speaker 1: I don't know what tendons I have in my legs
Speaker 1: right now, period. I don't think most people do. And
Speaker 1: I don't presume that if I ask some dude and
Speaker 1: the community college that he's going to be able to
Speaker 1: break down the tendons in his legs. So it's just
Speaker 1: a wild thing to ask somebody like, hey, do you
Speaker 1: got something different than was in my leg meet that
Speaker 1: neither one of us can see. The only tendons I
Speaker 1: know about are in pork tender tenderloins, right, I assume
Speaker 1: that's a tendon, that's a that's a pig tendon. Sure,
Speaker 1: I don't actually think it is, but I love I
Speaker 1: don't know what I'll be honest, I'm not even sure
Speaker 1: what attending is. I think it's the connector between muscles,
Speaker 1: if I'm understanding correctly. And I don't think that we
Speaker 1: eat that ship. I don't think that's what pork tender
Speaker 1: loin is. Well, I guess, I guess that's how you know.
Speaker 1: I don't went to community college there. You go a
Speaker 1: damn fool? How you know? That's how you know? I'm
Speaker 1: sharing it because I don't know what the tender loin is.
Speaker 1: I got money to eat it. I came here to lead,
Speaker 1: not to read. So so he he says this to you,
Speaker 1: He questions you about this possible secret tending in your leg,
Speaker 1: and your first response is what what do you say
Speaker 1: to him to handle this situation. I'm a curious person,
Speaker 1: so I think it just started probing. I was just like,
Speaker 1: you know, why do you think I have an extra
Speaker 1: leg tending? I mean, I asked him, ask him if
Speaker 1: you thought I had one? Yeah, I said, you're saying
Speaker 1: black people do you mean me? Because sometimes white people
Speaker 1: do the oaky dog we're asking something. Then generally that's
Speaker 1: the third type of black people. But they don't ever
Speaker 1: get around to asking you as if being their friend
Speaker 1: makes you not black, right, that you're somehow exception to
Speaker 1: the rule, that they're also still positioning you as the
Speaker 1: answer to the thing that they want to know. It's
Speaker 1: like they're doing, I'm not black, I'm o j But
Speaker 1: for you, you're not Jordan's. You're not black, you're Jordan.
Speaker 1: Jordan's your third base, baby girl. Now you're black, your
Speaker 1: third base, sometimes left field, you're sometimes sometimes you're the
Speaker 1: bat boy a matter of fact, go go I'm go
Speaker 1: get me a bat with your black but not gives
Speaker 1: you black you Jordan, Yeah, you're right because your ass
Speaker 1: is black, right, And so you become curious, you say,
Speaker 1: do you mean me? Does he then say like, yeah,
Speaker 1: you dude, Jordan, or is he more like no, it's
Speaker 1: more in general, I I'm just curious about the overall
Speaker 1: status of black people. Yeah, he was. He was like,
Speaker 1: I just want to know because I see some black
Speaker 1: people who I'm like, they definitely must and I'm like
Speaker 1: I'm like who, And he's like Baron Davis, and I'm like,
Speaker 1: I'm like Baron Davis. He's not like a big dunker.
Speaker 1: He's like, no, but he's like a smaller guy and
Speaker 1: he can he's dunked on big guys. I'm more he
Speaker 1: was a dunk. He was a dunker, and he's like,
Speaker 1: he's like Alan Iverson, but he's dunked on people like
Speaker 1: I see dunks and stuff. He was like, I don't
Speaker 1: even want to say I'm not racist because they're I
Speaker 1: feel like a lot of people are like, I'm not racist,
Speaker 1: and it's like, it's not that I'm not racist, it's
Speaker 1: just's I just want to ask questions. And I'm like
Speaker 1: he's like, no, I'm not listen, my guy, I am racist,
Speaker 1: but also I got questions. Don't get me wrong. I'll
Speaker 1: say the hard arm, but I say it with curiosity.
Speaker 1: There's a question mark at the end of Oh, that's
Speaker 1: so fun. I love that he already had a list prepared.
Speaker 1: I love that he knew exactly who he thought was
Speaker 1: criminal of this supposed secret tending he had. He knew
Speaker 1: Alan Iverson, Baron Davis, all these people who I can't
Speaker 1: explain why they physically are able to do the things
Speaker 1: that they do. They clearly must have an advantage that
Speaker 1: that he didn't have. It was never anybody, though not
Speaker 1: sports related, who maybe would do something like you can't
Speaker 1: have like a tent extra tending for your mind. You
Speaker 1: can't be like, wow, this nigga Baron Davis, or rather
Speaker 1: Colin Powell, when he delivered that speech about drone strike,
Speaker 1: it's like he had extra like he had an extra
Speaker 1: brain tending when he was deflecting all of those drones strike.
Speaker 1: What Obama was talking about, how that he would bomb
Speaker 1: the Jonas brothers. They didn't know. You know, he was
Speaker 1: so agile with his mind right, there's never it's not
Speaker 1: like the black mind. The synapses fire at a different
Speaker 1: rate than the white mind. It's always like, no, you
Speaker 1: guys are big, old idiots. We don't think you're smart
Speaker 1: at all. But your legs they must have a secret
Speaker 1: weapon in them because of how fast and strong you are.
Speaker 1: That's the real problem. We need to change the stereotype
Speaker 1: from leg tendons to brain tendons. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: When we we do extra this nigger must have an
Speaker 1: extra synapse, you know, No, we have to keep it
Speaker 1: at tending so that it fox them up and they're like, wait,
Speaker 1: brains don't have tendons. They think it's actually dumb. I
Speaker 1: don't know. I thought was just the thing we made
Speaker 1: up to be malicious and hurt them. But dumb is
Speaker 1: the new smart. So it's just like the dumber you
Speaker 1: can go, the more smart niggas would think you are.
Speaker 1: So it's like, I don't know if I understand this.
Speaker 1: Tell me more. Seemed like you're the one that's lost
Speaker 1: my brother. Seemed like Mama didn't tell you ship. Uh,
Speaker 1: so you're talking to this kid, Jeremy. He says what
Speaker 1: he says, he wants to know, he goes down his list.
Speaker 1: Do you then feel angry at this? Are you offended
Speaker 1: by this question? Where are your feelings at this point
Speaker 1: in relation to this question? Name? Well, I mean I
Speaker 1: was already like the Jackie Robinson on the team, but
Speaker 1: but like didn't break any color. Barrias wasn't good. I
Speaker 1: didn't experience any racism, and you know, I was like
Speaker 1: Jackie Robinson if if he was just there because of
Speaker 1: the race card, Like that's the time, like that was
Speaker 1: the one time that you had to actually really really
Speaker 1: be good but people wouldn't be like, you're just there
Speaker 1: because you're black. It's like they were mad at you
Speaker 1: because you were black, and then you had to be
Speaker 1: twice as good. Right. I do think that it's such
Speaker 1: an absurd question that it almost feels silly to get
Speaker 1: angry at it, if that makes sense. There are there
Speaker 1: are some questions where it's like that clearly is coming
Speaker 1: from a grounded, hateful place that like I feel like
Speaker 1: I anger is the right response because I need to
Speaker 1: be able to show you how offensive this is, and
Speaker 1: that one feels almost cartoonish. It's like all right, bro, yeah,
Speaker 1: and we got you know, a little like extra netting
Speaker 1: under our arms that help us fly once we in
Speaker 1: the air, Like we could just make ship up if
Speaker 1: that's what you wanna do. But what are we talking about? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I've had so many white kids in in my very
Speaker 1: suburban experience, like try to, you know, very passively make
Speaker 1: that suggestion that like, well, you're built different than everybody else.
Speaker 1: It's like, my dad is white. I could have got
Speaker 1: your shitty tendons, Like what are you talking about? How
Speaker 1: do you know that I specifically ended up with the
Speaker 1: tendon that you're claiming existence ship tensions and that Hank
Speaker 1: hill but need to need to need to wear orthopedic gas. Look,
Speaker 1: I'm just like you. Pull your pants down, just like
Speaker 1: I'm just like you. So you sort of come to
Speaker 1: this conclusion that this is absurd, but you're not gonna
Speaker 1: get angry at this kid. Uh. You, then, I guess
Speaker 1: go on to continue to ride the bench on this team.
Speaker 1: Uh does this ever come back up again? Does he
Speaker 1: ever revisit the conversation? No, it's not revisited. But I
Speaker 1: that we had weird interactions after that, Like the one
Speaker 1: time I did have a play that could potentially challenge
Speaker 1: that theory was I was like running in the outfield,
Speaker 1: and the one time I made a play on the ball,
Speaker 1: like I made a bad path to the fly ball
Speaker 1: and I auto corrected it, and I had gotten much
Speaker 1: faster and was working out in the gym a lot,
Speaker 1: and I actually caught the ball like on a diving
Speaker 1: like head first reaching for the ball like catch, and afterwards,
Speaker 1: like he was so happy for me, but he was
Speaker 1: like holding it in, like as if he was like
Speaker 1: keeping a secret, right, he knew you were superpowered, but
Speaker 1: he was gonna be cool and not tell nobody that
Speaker 1: he already knew. He knows that I ain't good for you,
Speaker 1: but I know about the secret tending. I ain't gonna
Speaker 1: tell nobody. Because my coach was picking up me. He
Speaker 1: was like, man, and you made a bad path, but like,
Speaker 1: clearly the gym is like working out, and he was.
Speaker 1: He was happy for me, like saying like he worked hard.
Speaker 1: But my friend was looking at me like, man, we
Speaker 1: know what was working. Black Jesus worked out on you,
Speaker 1: that one that one you, that's the Lord that gave
Speaker 1: you that gift. Look at God and God also has
Speaker 1: an extra legend of because we're made in his image.
Speaker 1: God is God is a black woman with an extra legtender.
Speaker 1: God is a black woman who can jump real, real high.
Speaker 1: For some reason, I love that. So this continues forward.
Speaker 1: Had you heard that before this kid said it to you?
Speaker 1: Was there a point in your life where where you've
Speaker 1: heard it either before or since? Then We're like, you've
Speaker 1: had to readdress this conversation. I've never really heard of
Speaker 1: it before that, But I was watching like Jackie Journa
Speaker 1: Cursey and Maryan Jones or whatever, and I would be like,
Speaker 1: there's something extra about them. It ended up being steroids.
Speaker 1: But you know that, you know, I also have, Like
Speaker 1: you know, no matter how like conscious or woke or
Speaker 1: like black people are, they don't they never realize how
Speaker 1: much subconscious like not even self hate, but like biased
Speaker 1: they have, like against their own celves. Is like they
Speaker 1: need to undo the white man living in their brain
Speaker 1: or in your case, living in the house. It wasn't
Speaker 1: some conscious It was whispering and under the door while
Speaker 1: I sleep. He didn't come by the door and be
Speaker 1: like listen to the white man, and he was talking
Speaker 1: about himselves specifically, but it applied. It went for everybody. No.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's just so fascinating to me because so
Speaker 1: many of the arguments that I heard came when I
Speaker 1: was a kid, Like it came from like young people
Speaker 1: who were sort of speculating about the athletics of black people.
Speaker 1: But then we get older and like we're on a
Speaker 1: fucking podcast, we tell jokes like whatever this secret weapon
Speaker 1: that either of us may or may not have had,
Speaker 1: it didn't go to good use, you know what I mean, Like,
Speaker 1: there's no way you're gonna convince me Bruce Bruce has
Speaker 1: an extra tendant in his leg. I would argue Bruce.
Speaker 1: Bruce is the only nigga who does have a tending. Okay,
Speaker 1: I'm listening to tell me more. Yeah, I mean, have
Speaker 1: you seen a move. I'll say this. The man can
Speaker 1: carry a big suit in a way that it almost
Speaker 1: seems humanly impossible, and he puts all that silk on
Speaker 1: his shoulders and and somehow manages to make it look seamless,
Speaker 1: look just smooth across the stage. It's just it's not
Speaker 1: it's not affecting any athletic ability. He can get on
Speaker 1: stage and just kind of like riff and do anything,
Speaker 1: and like people will laugh. And it's like part of
Speaker 1: just witnessing a man as large as he standing up
Speaker 1: there with energy and poise. And that's the only kind
Speaker 1: of energy employees you can have if there's an extra
Speaker 1: piece of meat connected to your hit bone the leg,
Speaker 1: And it just made him more graceful and poised on stage,
Speaker 1: especially if you're large. You know, it's like you have
Speaker 1: to have a kind of grab atass, you know. And
Speaker 1: it's some people are like described it as jona Qua
Speaker 1: and it's like all the French ship the jonas Qua
Speaker 1: is the leg ten dome, that's the doona si qua
Speaker 1: and it's like there's just something about him. I can't
Speaker 1: put my finger on it. It's the goddamn leg. And
Speaker 1: he don't need to jump high. You just smooth and
Speaker 1: silk silk robes. Don't jump high. For what he's got
Speaker 1: all this charisma flowing through him. He ain't got to jump.
Speaker 1: I love it. Yeah, man, all right, Well, we're gonna
Speaker 1: take a break and we'll be back with more Jordan's
Speaker 1: temple and more of my mama told me. And we
Speaker 1: are back. I'm supposed to meet his meat with this ship. Bro,
Speaker 1: What the fu? Yeah, we're back here with more Jordan's
Speaker 1: temples and more of my mama told me. We're still
Speaker 1: talking about that mysterious leg tending that these black people
Speaker 1: supposedly have hiding in their calf muscles making them jump
Speaker 1: high up in the sky. Have you ever been able
Speaker 1: to jump? Sprior? You? Are you a very fast or
Speaker 1: very good jumper? I might be a good jumper, I'm
Speaker 1: and I'm like gracefully underrated. That's how I described myself
Speaker 1: because because there's a lot of things I'll do and
Speaker 1: I'll surprise myself and then people would be like, Hi,
Speaker 1: are you good at so? And so, and I'll be like,
Speaker 1: I'm fine, and then I do it and they'd be
Speaker 1: like this, Nigga's amazing, I got you. That sounds like
Speaker 1: a self esteem you know what I mean? That like
Speaker 1: one of those things where it's a difference between professional
Speaker 1: athletes and people that end up, I guess hosting podcasts.
Speaker 1: You have to have enough faith in yourself to believe
Speaker 1: that when you jump it means something for the world,
Speaker 1: as opposed to when I jump, I'm like, I was embarrassing.
Speaker 1: I'm never gonna do it again. But yeah, I go
Speaker 1: between having a lot of confidence and no confidence. But
Speaker 1: also it's like if people ask me if I could jump,
Speaker 1: and it would be like, one example, I would never
Speaker 1: jump because it's not I wouldn't ever jump for nobody that.
Speaker 1: It's like, I'm also not trying to compare it to
Speaker 1: nobody's ship. I'm like, can you jump? Let me see.
Speaker 1: I'm like out here, all right, you're too much of
Speaker 1: a contrarian, like to participate in a group sport where
Speaker 1: they ask you to line up and be like the
Speaker 1: dude in front of you. Yeah, that's some that's some
Speaker 1: sucker ship. I get that. Hell yeah, that's that's how
Speaker 1: they get that's how they get. Yeah, I got you,
Speaker 1: I see what you're doing. Alright, let's get into some
Speaker 1: of this research, because I took my time to really
Speaker 1: try to figure out if there's any legitimacy to this
Speaker 1: black people tending conversation. And one of the things that
Speaker 1: makes this whole conversation so problematic or difficult to research
Speaker 1: is that in unpacking things, I discovered that a fair
Speaker 1: amount of reputable, peer reviewed sites at some point in
Speaker 1: history had different thoughts on this issue than they probably
Speaker 1: would today, you know what I mean. So there's all
Speaker 1: these articles that come out in nine that are like, yeah,
Speaker 1: black people's legs are different than than white people's legs,
Speaker 1: and then that same source would now say like, h No,
Speaker 1: there's absolutely no difference between black people's legs and white
Speaker 1: people's legs. So it's one of those things where I think,
Speaker 1: depending on when you decided to research it, you get
Speaker 1: completely different information, if that makes sense. And then you
Speaker 1: find out that they're also burying things even further, like
Speaker 1: something au peer of view thing like Yale would try
Speaker 1: to be woken out about some stupid ship like that. Meanwhile,
Speaker 1: they had slave quarters. They're like we don't we don't
Speaker 1: have any of this about black people. But it's like,
Speaker 1: not only did y'all have slave quarters, but y'all like
Speaker 1: predominantly white institution that's benefited from slavery itself. Right, Yes,
Speaker 1: it's exactly that. I think that there's so much of
Speaker 1: the way that we frame history that is just rewriting
Speaker 1: the bad ship we already did. And so it's like,
Speaker 1: I get it that you personally were not a participant
Speaker 1: in this thing, but you don't get to just skip
Speaker 1: over the fact that, like your institution fully supported a
Speaker 1: bad idea no more than thirty years ago, exactly very recent. Yeah,
Speaker 1: Yale had slaves. Shout out to Catherine, shout out, Katherine Cohen,
Speaker 1: Yale had slaves. You already your first I don't know
Speaker 1: if that's true. It sounds right to me, so I
Speaker 1: support it all. Right, here's what I found. There's very
Speaker 1: little evidence, as I think we both know that the
Speaker 1: negro has some sort of secret tendon. How Ever, there
Speaker 1: is a lot of evidence throughout history of white people
Speaker 1: trying to figure out the physical differences between black and
Speaker 1: white people as a way of identifying their own advantages
Speaker 1: and disadvantages. Right, So, I'll start us off with one
Speaker 1: of the beginnings of a lot of these things. In
Speaker 1: seventeen eighty seven, this British doctor Benjamin Moseley claimed that
Speaker 1: he could, basically, through the study of white people, figure
Speaker 1: out one of the major differences, or the two major
Speaker 1: differences between black and white people, was that black people
Speaker 1: number one, had a wider threshold for pain, like we
Speaker 1: could deal with pain better than white people could. And
Speaker 1: then number two, we had weak lungs compared to white people,
Speaker 1: and those weak lungs could only be fixed through forced labor.
Speaker 1: That by being forced to do physical work, we were
Speaker 1: always going to have like a weaker capacity for breathing
Speaker 1: than our white counterparts. Oh my god, that is insane. Yeah. Wow.
Speaker 1: So he he writes this article or or basically like
Speaker 1: does this study and one of the things that he
Speaker 1: does in this study, and he writes about it, he says, uh,
Speaker 1: and this is him talking about like these surgical operations
Speaker 1: he was doing on black people, obviously against their will.
Speaker 1: But he would say, what would be the cause of
Speaker 1: the insupportable pain to a white man? A Negro would
Speaker 1: almost disregard. I have amputated the legs of many Negroes
Speaker 1: who have held the upper part of the limbs themselves
Speaker 1: that basically, while he's cutting off black people's legs, the
Speaker 1: black man is able to hold his own thigh and
Speaker 1: not scream out because we just don't feel pain the
Speaker 1: way that white people do. Oh my god, kill me.
Speaker 1: They're just like, hey, right here, doc ain't nothing. That's
Speaker 1: the way. That's the weirdest thing, because it's like a
Speaker 1: lot of slaves ran away. They try to act like
Speaker 1: we ain't like to do that. It's like, you can't
Speaker 1: have a weak lung capacity if we talk, people don't
Speaker 1: think and see Africans and African Americans are the same,
Speaker 1: but they'll be rooting on like Kenyans and ship when
Speaker 1: they're jogging, and it's like, we got the same lungs
Speaker 1: as Kenyans, we just don't have the same air. They
Speaker 1: got like thin air. We got polluted, shitty air. And
Speaker 1: they're just like, I guess they got bad lungs or
Speaker 1: the same lungs as those, Or they're in circumstances that
Speaker 1: require them to run more often, or they're not hit
Speaker 1: with distractions that allow for them to constantly be doing
Speaker 1: other things. They get to focus on the sport more effectively.
Speaker 1: There's a lot of explanations. As a lot we might
Speaker 1: run differently, but it certainly is not that we don't
Speaker 1: feel pain and our lungs need to be trained through
Speaker 1: forced labor. Definitely not. We got slave lungs. We got good.
Speaker 1: So I'm glad you're bringing up the idea of slaves
Speaker 1: running away because in eighteen fifty one, this physician and
Speaker 1: again all of these are doctors, All of these are
Speaker 1: highly respected people in their fields. Right, This physician, Samuel Cartwright,
Speaker 1: who was like very famous dude, releases this study that,
Speaker 1: among other things, claims that black people have a disease
Speaker 1: of the mind called drape tonia, drape tomania, that's what
Speaker 1: it is, drape tomania, which caused them to run away
Speaker 1: from their enslavers, insisting that enslaved people contracted this ailment
Speaker 1: when they're enslavers treated them as equals, and the only
Speaker 1: way to get rid of it is whipping the devil
Speaker 1: out of them. Hm. Wow, This is a medical doctor
Speaker 1: in eighteen fifty one saying that slaves have a sickness
Speaker 1: that forces them to run away and the only way
Speaker 1: to fix it is to beat them until the devil
Speaker 1: leaves their bodies. Damn. Now romania drape tomania. Oh, at
Speaker 1: first I thought you meant dracomania. That's when has got
Speaker 1: a bunch of got a bunch of DraCos. Well, listen
Speaker 1: to yeah, listen to me goes, Listen, I wish those
Speaker 1: slaves that Draco's back. Then this would have been a
Speaker 1: different conversation, Yeah to son. But in America. So this
Speaker 1: is where it gets even more complicated. Right, is that Cartwright,
Speaker 1: amongst you know, all the crazy things he said about
Speaker 1: sort of like this mental disease, was also one of
Speaker 1: the first physicians, in order to prove that whole lung
Speaker 1: capacity thing, to use something called a spiral meter as
Speaker 1: a way of measuring respiratory illnesses, right, And in that
Speaker 1: measure of respiratory illnesses, he basically decided that black people
Speaker 1: have twenty less capacity than white people when it comes
Speaker 1: to breathing. Now, in current society, we still use his
Speaker 1: spiral me eater as a measure of like the way
Speaker 1: that we measure lung capacity. And even more so, there's
Speaker 1: still functions in the software that function for race correction,
Speaker 1: meaning that like there's a part of the algorithm that
Speaker 1: if you encounter a black person corrects itself presuming that
Speaker 1: our lung capacity is somehow less than our white counterparts. Today,
Speaker 1: what I really changes the meaning of black lung, black lung.
Speaker 1: It's a black coal. Mine got black lung. You got
Speaker 1: double black lungs, guys, man, can your lungs living in
Speaker 1: double jeopardy? The saddest thing about that is what technology is,
Speaker 1: like you scan it. It's like nigger, Yeah, it's like right,
Speaker 1: this technology is basically being like I don't let him
Speaker 1: sit down, make him go through the back door. It's like,
Speaker 1: it's all problematic to think to your point earlier that
Speaker 1: like we pretend as if we made this progress, when
Speaker 1: in fact, the literal utensils and logic of people we've
Speaker 1: deemed crazy and irresponsible are still being treated regular today.
Speaker 1: So there's this book that gets published in eighteen fifty
Speaker 1: five by this dude, John Brown, who was a former slave.
Speaker 1: It's called a Slave Life in Georgia, narrative of the life,
Speaker 1: sufferings and escape of John Brown, a fugitive slave now
Speaker 1: in England, where it chronicles his journey John Brown as
Speaker 1: he basically is being experimented on by this doctor Thomas
Speaker 1: Hamilton's And one of the things that Dr Thomas Hamilton
Speaker 1: believes is that black people's skin is thicker than white
Speaker 1: people's skin. Right that it's literally like we got more
Speaker 1: layers of skin than they do, which is part of
Speaker 1: the argument for us not feeling pain the same way
Speaker 1: that they do. But one of the things he does
Speaker 1: to John Brown is over a nine month period, he
Speaker 1: like brings John Brown in every day and and intentionally
Speaker 1: blisters his skin over and over again to see if
Speaker 1: every time he blisters it he can keep it from
Speaker 1: going down to the white meat. Like he just wants
Speaker 1: to prove that each blister only stays that at black
Speaker 1: meat all the way down. H He wants to see
Speaker 1: where black people are white. Well, he wants to see
Speaker 1: how far that meat goes down? You black? But how
Speaker 1: black are you? Does it keep going or is this
Speaker 1: just stopping at the surface. That's what all these hosts say.
Speaker 1: See how far that meat goes down? Do comt how
Speaker 1: black are you? How far does that meat go down?
Speaker 1: You're gonna find You're gonna find out, stupid. We gotta
Speaker 1: make that the name of the episode. How far does
Speaker 1: that meet go down? I love that that's a perfect name.
Speaker 1: I'm getting a note from Hans in two of first
Speaker 1: and second year medical students endorsed the belief that black
Speaker 1: people's skin is thicker than white people's. So he's already
Speaker 1: jumping ahead to the larger point here that I think
Speaker 1: what we're seeing is a bunch of evidence that the
Speaker 1: things that were treated as normal in the eighteen hundred
Speaker 1: seventeen hundreds in relation to what is obviously like huge
Speaker 1: racial bias, is still being treated normally today. Right, that
Speaker 1: like we didn't somehow get better in any of this ship, right,
Speaker 1: And it was justification for all the experiments that we're
Speaker 1: talking about earlier, which included this Tuskegee experiments and giving
Speaker 1: black men syphilis and all this stuff. And you know, yes,
Speaker 1: much differently, much different from today. Exactly get syphilis themselves, right,
Speaker 1: We earn it on our own. If I'm I'm a symphilist,
Speaker 1: I want to earn it. I don't want it to
Speaker 1: be given to me by some evil white doctor. Let
Speaker 1: me go out and get syphilis from a kind, dirty
Speaker 1: woman the way I deserve. Yeah, I'm gonna get syphilis
Speaker 1: from a goofy white woman who right after she asked
Speaker 1: me how far does that meet? Go, I think that's right.
Speaker 1: People mad at that statement, but it's like, how far
Speaker 1: did black people go for a black man to say
Speaker 1: he got syphilis from a white woman? Come on, this
Speaker 1: is progress, goofy bitch niggas. Niggas loved Kamala Harris, but
Speaker 1: they don't like a black man getting syphilis from a
Speaker 1: white man. And that's the problem in this goddamn country.
Speaker 1: If I should say so myself, you know what I'm saying,
Speaker 1: and I think you should. I think everybody needs to
Speaker 1: hear your thoughts on syphilis and equality. Absolutely, it certainly
Speaker 1: is pushing us closer to our dream. Yeah, lest people
Speaker 1: should vote more black men should get syphilis from white woman.
Speaker 1: That's the only way that such is gonna see a change,
Speaker 1: the real correction in this We gotta just keep passing
Speaker 1: inter racial syphilis. That's the only way that should be
Speaker 1: the name that should be in parentheses. How far does
Speaker 1: this meat goes syphilis? Nope, you're not gonna turn this
Speaker 1: into some psychotic mind dream, Nope, this is We're gonna
Speaker 1: keep it as something very clear and very simple of
Speaker 1: interracial pairing. Wow, the self hate is clearly coming. I
Speaker 1: got work I've got work to do, just like the
Speaker 1: rest of us. So I think I'll bring up one
Speaker 1: more example of exactly what I mean. But so this dude,
Speaker 1: Jay Mary and Sims, who is basically considered like the
Speaker 1: father of modern gynecology. Right, he writes basically about this
Speaker 1: study he did from eighteen to eighteen forty nine where
Speaker 1: he would cut the gin those a black women over
Speaker 1: and over again in an effort to perfect this surgical
Speaker 1: technique to repair something called that's a co vaginal fistula.
Speaker 1: I'm not a doctor. I don't know how to say
Speaker 1: these words. But the whole point is is that over
Speaker 1: and over again he basically took these slaves and cut
Speaker 1: their vaginas, trying to cira an issue with women's bladders
Speaker 1: and their vaginas. No, no, sir, cut it out exactly.
Speaker 1: But that man, that person is considered a father of
Speaker 1: the study that we still practice. Even though we know
Speaker 1: that what he was doing was wrong, we still celebrate
Speaker 1: him as like the conceiver of like these important types
Speaker 1: of research. No, that man protect black women. Shout out
Speaker 1: to Henrietta Lacks. Read that book about Henrietta Lacks. Ourselves
Speaker 1: everywhere day in space, you know, what I'm saying that man,
Speaker 1: they all kinds of ship. Shout out to Henrietta lax
Speaker 1: wanted for real man, Henrietta Lax Man, whole family. Man,
Speaker 1: they need billions of dollars. Man, Shout out Henriette Alex.
Speaker 1: So I I want to bring up one final thing
Speaker 1: that I think is really important for us to talk
Speaker 1: about in this one. Actually was was something that I
Speaker 1: had never considered before, and certainly in relation to this
Speaker 1: conversation when everybody claims that black people somehow have this
Speaker 1: magical tendon that doesn't exist in white people. One of
Speaker 1: the things that scientists often point to in its absurdity
Speaker 1: is the fact that the only research they've ever really
Speaker 1: done to support this is based on professional athletes. So
Speaker 1: they're the silliness of suggesting that we could measure any
Speaker 1: human based off of the physical attributes of Lebron James
Speaker 1: is insane. That's not a regular human being, do you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. It's not it's not fair ever
Speaker 1: to like take somebody like Lebron or you know, all
Speaker 1: these basketball players and ship. They're also overcoming tremendous odds.
Speaker 1: It's not just that they're six eight, six nine, six
Speaker 1: ten is that they have to play at the highest
Speaker 1: level of every level, and in Lebron's case, have a
Speaker 1: single mom. Having a single mom and not having your
Speaker 1: dad around is the biggest indicator for being able to
Speaker 1: dunk on niggas and and people maybe thinking you have
Speaker 1: an extra legtendant or definitely having something wrong with you. Sure,
Speaker 1: even if he has an extra legtend and he has
Speaker 1: one less dad, and that should calculate into his performance.
Speaker 1: Absolutely they need to have, you know, missing a dad
Speaker 1: index instead of all these other indexes. That's the only
Speaker 1: thing that pushes you. That's the only thing that pushes you,
Speaker 1: you know. And that's one of the things that scientists
Speaker 1: say is that there are plenty of examples of people
Speaker 1: who make it to six eight, six nine who don't
Speaker 1: become professional athletes. Are certainly not to the scale of
Speaker 1: the Lebron James who basically fit his same physical profile.
Speaker 1: So the suggestion that all black people somehow share this
Speaker 1: quality is absurd. And then they go a step further
Speaker 1: in this part really cracked it open for me is
Speaker 1: that they say that obviously of black people in America
Speaker 1: are sort of like a part of like the African
Speaker 1: slave trade, right, that like we are the product, if
Speaker 1: nothing else, of slaves being brought from Africa to America
Speaker 1: and then put into slavery. And that's part of the
Speaker 1: reason that they claimed that this tendon was able to
Speaker 1: grow or spawn or where it came from whatever, whatever.
Speaker 1: But what they never factor in is how many people
Speaker 1: are truly mixed in their genealogy, right that, how many
Speaker 1: of these slave owners raped and mixed with their slaves
Speaker 1: and and created lines of black people who are not
Speaker 1: in fact entirely black, but are very much a part
Speaker 1: of white history in a certain way, right right, they
Speaker 1: got they know, you'll realized, like the leg tending that
Speaker 1: they're saying black people have is being canceled out by
Speaker 1: some like slave on or some accountant back in the day,
Speaker 1: Like you got as much accountant genes as you do,
Speaker 1: like you know, and accounting genes cancel out the fucking
Speaker 1: leg tending genes exactly. So there's a real possibility that
Speaker 1: y'all are just skipping over the truth because you're jealous
Speaker 1: of the fact that like some niggs jump higher than you.
Speaker 1: And that's that. And something is also could write off
Speaker 1: the taxes better than you because they got them them
Speaker 1: white accountant genes. Yeah, I heard something interesting about like
Speaker 1: light skinned people the other day or just just in
Speaker 1: terms in New York Times. Oh that don't make it better,
Speaker 1: but go I mean yeah, I mean maybe niggas for Trump.
Speaker 1: Like I was saying, speaking to the mixed ness and
Speaker 1: the rape, you're talking about black people slaves. This woman
Speaker 1: was like, you know, I don't have light skin. I
Speaker 1: have rape colored skin. And it's like that. It was
Speaker 1: wild because just to be reminded and to be like,
Speaker 1: there's a reason for this, and then it was self
Speaker 1: segregated for other reasons, you know, sometimes even in your
Speaker 1: own home. Because my brother's my brother's a light skin
Speaker 1: and um, you know we got the same mom, different dad.
Speaker 1: His dad's Dominican and my dad is Haitian. You know,
Speaker 1: growing up that get along fine. And man, growing up,
Speaker 1: he had most of the room. M hmm, just like
Speaker 1: the island we called it Hispaniola. We're real nerds, and
Speaker 1: and every day somebody would come through and be like
Speaker 1: hurricane motherfucker and knock all your ship over. Yeah. People
Speaker 1: be like, man, did you hear what happened on Dominican Republic?
Speaker 1: And I'd be like, you mean that side of the room.
Speaker 1: I can't go on, and they're like, no the country.
Speaker 1: I'm like, get the funk out of here. I never
Speaker 1: heard of that ship. What is that? Uh So honestly,
Speaker 1: I don't know. Let's start to a break. We're gonna
Speaker 1: throw the one more break and then we'll be back
Speaker 1: with more Jordan's Temple and more of my Mama told me.
Speaker 1: And we aren't that. Yeah, we're back here with more
Speaker 1: of my mom told me or Jordan's temple. We we
Speaker 1: are still talking about the possibility that all of these
Speaker 1: speculations about black people's physicality is mostly rooted in a
Speaker 1: type of jealousy that white people have had about things
Speaker 1: that they can and cannot do and uh probably try
Speaker 1: to do but just weren't quite as good at m
Speaker 1: Just like everything else, they dusty, They dusty. That's the
Speaker 1: big takeaway is that white people are dusty, and uh
Speaker 1: they just need to get over it. Just be dusty
Speaker 1: and be honest about it. All right. So I want
Speaker 1: to play a game. This is a game that I
Speaker 1: thought of mostly in relation to this topic. We've spent
Speaker 1: this entire time talking about this secret tendon that black
Speaker 1: athletes are supposed to have that makes them jump higher,
Speaker 1: run faster, all that stuff. What I think would be
Speaker 1: a good time is us going down a list of
Speaker 1: famous white athletes and for us to speculate what kind
Speaker 1: of special attribut you think that they might have in
Speaker 1: their body that makes them so successful at what they
Speaker 1: do that makes sense? M hell yeah, Okay. The first
Speaker 1: athlete that I would love for us to discuss is
Speaker 1: Peyton Manning. Peyton Manning, famous quarterback football star, arguably one
Speaker 1: of the greatest quarterbacks of all time. What would you
Speaker 1: say makes Peyton Manning special physically? What secret muscle or
Speaker 1: tendon does Peyton Manning have cooking up in his big
Speaker 1: old body? Hmm, I don't know. Probably that his fucking face. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he got disarming, like ugly handsome. Oh, Like he's definitely
Speaker 1: not handsome, you know, he's disgusting, but he looks like
Speaker 1: he's like weirdly charming, like the nigga from the Goonies.
Speaker 1: He's like, yeah, he's like slow. I think you're nailing
Speaker 1: something because Peyton Manning's got all that extra head, right,
Speaker 1: and I think that some of that extra head is
Speaker 1: maybe encased with extra bone, if you will, that allows
Speaker 1: for him to take hits to the head better than
Speaker 1: the average black person who might be getting hit in
Speaker 1: the head in football, which makes him a more capable quarterback. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I think so too. I think if he was on
Speaker 1: the field and he was a defensive tackle in instead
Speaker 1: of trying to line up and tackle him, you shot
Speaker 1: him in the head, he would just be like right,
Speaker 1: that bullets bouncing off and he didn't even lose concentration, na,
Speaker 1: not at all on that extra head. Okay, so Peyton
Speaker 1: Manning's got extra head and we agree on that. Let's
Speaker 1: go to another athlete. Uh, let's do uh Sean White,
Speaker 1: you know Sean Wright. Uh, he's snowboarding fame. I think
Speaker 1: it must be like I'll go back to the face
Speaker 1: the freckles, Like I think freckle also like disarm you.
Speaker 1: Like they must empower you too for niggas to think
Speaker 1: like you know that you're like a humble person, and
Speaker 1: like clearly he's not, Like he's just like, yeah, I'm
Speaker 1: just weak and attacked by the sun. And then he
Speaker 1: busts out a nine hundred. You know what I'm saying?
Speaker 1: Like that, I think that Shaun White uses his freckles
Speaker 1: to put his competitors at a disadvantage. Right, the sun
Speaker 1: bounces off the freckles and forces his competitors to be
Speaker 1: blinded in the snow, and then he gets to go
Speaker 1: and do all his cool tricks uninterrupted, unblinded. They actually,
Speaker 1: absolutely they actually have strings connected to the ends of them,
Speaker 1: and they just like pull him closer to the hair.
Speaker 1: Those freckles were watching. God, I get what you're saying.
Speaker 1: They connected. Okay, let's try a different person. Let's do uh,
Speaker 1: who's a Who's a fun one? If we're gonna keep
Speaker 1: doing canceled people, let's do Lance arm Strong Lands arm Strong.
Speaker 1: What do you think gave him his special technique, his
Speaker 1: special powers as an athlete. I think it's probably his balls.
Speaker 1: I think his holds in his you know, like he
Speaker 1: survived the gesticular cancer. But it's not about that. It's
Speaker 1: how he can keep his nuts on the bike, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean? Like a white man, you know,
Speaker 1: populates the world with so much evil, and all the
Speaker 1: evil comes from the white man's bass, Right, the white
Speaker 1: man's balls are the most evil thing on the planet.
Speaker 1: And he got testicular cancer not just because cancer, but
Speaker 1: because he's an evil ast white man. And it didn't
Speaker 1: kill him like it doesn't kill most white men. I
Speaker 1: think that's the statistic because most evil comes from white
Speaker 1: man's bass, because the white people are evil, right, those
Speaker 1: technical no listen, brother, listen now. I feel like, as
Speaker 1: someone who came from a white man's bass, you're not
Speaker 1: understanding the evil that I've discussed it that lurks within.
Speaker 1: We have to pass, we have to pause, we have
Speaker 1: to pass the reel from the faith. And the fake
Speaker 1: is seeing that a white man winning a bicycle race.
Speaker 1: It's just an extension of his evil nut sack laying
Speaker 1: on a place for an extended period of time, naturally,
Speaker 1: because the evil is canceling out the pain from the
Speaker 1: black seat. Because what's more evil than a white man's bass,
Speaker 1: honestly nothing, Definitely not a bike seat. I mean, God
Speaker 1: bless him. People toesticulate cancer is a terrible thing. That's
Speaker 1: not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about the evil
Speaker 1: of a white man's balls. Okay, a white man's nuts
Speaker 1: land on a bike seat for an extended period of
Speaker 1: time would give him the power to be the greatest
Speaker 1: cyclist ever. Because a white man has all these seeds
Speaker 1: he spreads around the earth. Right, we call little white
Speaker 1: devils and there's not a sperm leaking out right. I
Speaker 1: feel like you don't even believe in track. No, I
Speaker 1: ain't on track. I'm on track, just like, what do
Speaker 1: you want to That was beautiful? That's cool, motherfuck. I
Speaker 1: think honestly, I think that that's a pretty clear finishing move.
Speaker 1: I think, by your suggestion, Lance Armstrong, losing that ball
Speaker 1: allows for him to fit more comfortably on the seat,
Speaker 1: and although he can't spread his evil the way that
Speaker 1: he was before, it does give him an advantage in
Speaker 1: a bike rate. God blocked it blocked his level, but
Speaker 1: empowered his biking. It was beautiful. I think we did
Speaker 1: it Jordan's I think we we nailed everything today. I
Speaker 1: think everything was covered. Could you tell the people where
Speaker 1: they could find you? What cool ship you have going on?
Speaker 1: You can find me on hands busting it open, you know,
Speaker 1: out the pussy for a real nigger. If you want
Speaker 1: to find me on Hinge. I'm on Instagram, you know,
Speaker 1: spreading joy and love at Jordi ploy. I'm terrible at Twitter,
Speaker 1: but yeah I'm on Instagram and Hinge. God's a black woman.
Speaker 1: How far does that mean? Go down Jordan's temple? Everybody
Speaker 1: one more time for him, And as always, you can
Speaker 1: follow me at lengthtin Herman on all of the platforms
Speaker 1: that you so choose. And if you have any drops
Speaker 1: that you would like to send us, artwork, ideas, conspiracy
Speaker 1: theories that you want to record on your phone and
Speaker 1: send my way that we could potentially play in an episode,
Speaker 1: please send those to my Mama pod at gmail dot com.
Speaker 1: And please like and subscribe to podcasts and say nice
Speaker 1: things or mean things. I don't know, I like them
Speaker 1: all either way. This was fun by your mans. Uncle
Speaker 1: wil Beers were racist. They also players for folks in
Speaker 1: money versus do many turkey stuff. I can't tell me
Speaker 1: God b