1 00:00:00,680 --> 00:00:03,640 Speaker 1: CUTI misconnections. 2 00:00:03,880 --> 00:00:06,840 Speaker 2: That was me staring There's only two places to find 3 00:00:06,880 --> 00:00:09,920 Speaker 2: true love in this world. One is on an exploration 4 00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:12,800 Speaker 2: trip to Mars, when you and the Russian cosmonon find 5 00:00:12,840 --> 00:00:15,480 Speaker 2: a whole new meaning for the word space junk. 6 00:00:16,840 --> 00:00:19,240 Speaker 1: No same meaning that I had when I was on Earth, Jeff. 7 00:00:20,079 --> 00:00:23,240 Speaker 2: The others on the pages of craigslist dot org, the 8 00:00:23,280 --> 00:00:25,799 Speaker 2: website that we scour every single week to find the 9 00:00:25,800 --> 00:00:28,400 Speaker 2: best miss connections that they have to offer, like this 10 00:00:28,480 --> 00:00:32,800 Speaker 2: first one titled your hahas gave me the hot hots, 11 00:00:33,120 --> 00:00:37,839 Speaker 2: Oh woman for man thirties comedy club open mic night. 12 00:00:38,040 --> 00:00:44,279 Speaker 2: Oh okay, she says, Oh my god, you were so 13 00:00:44,800 --> 00:00:47,800 Speaker 2: funny the other night. You were the comic that had 14 00:00:47,800 --> 00:00:53,240 Speaker 2: the joke about Ken hooking up with g I Joe hilarious. 15 00:00:53,960 --> 00:00:56,320 Speaker 2: I don't know why no one else laughed. I thought 16 00:00:56,320 --> 00:00:58,280 Speaker 2: it was so funny. 17 00:00:59,200 --> 00:01:01,680 Speaker 3: Visual if no one's been to a comedy open mic, 18 00:01:01,760 --> 00:01:06,440 Speaker 3: you should, just so you know what awkward silence feels like. 19 00:01:06,600 --> 00:01:07,080 Speaker 4: She says. 20 00:01:07,200 --> 00:01:11,080 Speaker 2: I was the unnatural blonde sitting four rows back. 21 00:01:11,360 --> 00:01:12,720 Speaker 4: That shouted. 22 00:01:14,800 --> 00:01:17,760 Speaker 2: That shouted, Hey g I Joe, I'm Barbie, let me 23 00:01:17,800 --> 00:01:18,640 Speaker 2: see your weapon. 24 00:01:20,360 --> 00:01:21,880 Speaker 1: How is she funnier than the comedians. 25 00:01:22,920 --> 00:01:25,240 Speaker 2: I was a little tipsy, so I don't remember exactly 26 00:01:25,240 --> 00:01:27,120 Speaker 2: what you said back to me, but whatever it was, 27 00:01:27,200 --> 00:01:28,520 Speaker 2: I totally cracked up. 28 00:01:28,760 --> 00:01:30,679 Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, you gotta laugh. 29 00:01:31,440 --> 00:01:36,720 Speaker 2: Surprisingly, no one else did again this room. I guess 30 00:01:36,720 --> 00:01:39,960 Speaker 2: we were vibing and no one could enter our atmospheres. 31 00:01:42,040 --> 00:01:45,399 Speaker 2: After our flirty exchange, you playfully told the waitress to 32 00:01:45,440 --> 00:01:46,160 Speaker 2: cut me off. 33 00:01:46,360 --> 00:01:48,640 Speaker 4: Oh she thought you were serious. 34 00:01:50,840 --> 00:01:55,440 Speaker 2: Does she not understand that you work in a comedy club? Hello? 35 00:01:56,440 --> 00:01:58,920 Speaker 3: And does he not understand the only person laughing at 36 00:01:58,960 --> 00:02:03,200 Speaker 3: him is the one lady? Dude? 37 00:02:03,840 --> 00:02:06,400 Speaker 2: Anyway, I went out to get some fresh air and 38 00:02:06,560 --> 00:02:08,480 Speaker 2: ended up going home with some guy that said he 39 00:02:08,560 --> 00:02:10,200 Speaker 2: was friends with Cedric the entertainer. 40 00:02:11,440 --> 00:02:13,200 Speaker 4: He's almost as funny as you. 41 00:02:13,680 --> 00:02:22,080 Speaker 2: Almost anyways, will you call me please? Signed B Yeah. 42 00:02:22,639 --> 00:02:23,560 Speaker 4: B for Barbie. 43 00:02:23,760 --> 00:02:27,639 Speaker 2: This next misconnection is titled I drew a bird, Then 44 00:02:27,680 --> 00:02:32,360 Speaker 2: you gave me the bird? Oh Man woman thirties, College 45 00:02:32,400 --> 00:02:33,200 Speaker 2: of Art and Design. 46 00:02:33,440 --> 00:02:35,079 Speaker 1: Feels like her message is clear, sir. 47 00:02:35,760 --> 00:02:38,320 Speaker 2: He says, we used to sit next to each other 48 00:02:38,360 --> 00:02:42,120 Speaker 2: in three dimensional design. Remember me, I was the only 49 00:02:42,200 --> 00:02:42,760 Speaker 2: guy there. 50 00:02:43,280 --> 00:02:44,519 Speaker 1: Then she probably does. 51 00:02:44,680 --> 00:02:47,560 Speaker 2: And every day you came in and said you're not 52 00:02:47,600 --> 00:02:50,360 Speaker 2: going to draw another grouping of triangles again, are you? 53 00:02:51,080 --> 00:02:53,880 Speaker 2: What can I say? If you're good at something, don't stop. 54 00:02:55,680 --> 00:02:58,680 Speaker 1: He's got those three sides just down. 55 00:02:58,840 --> 00:03:01,440 Speaker 2: Anyway, that was about five years ago. Now I can't 56 00:03:01,480 --> 00:03:05,120 Speaker 2: find you anywhere online. Last thing I heard about you 57 00:03:05,480 --> 00:03:07,960 Speaker 2: was that you couldn't afford tuition anymore, so you moved 58 00:03:08,000 --> 00:03:11,679 Speaker 2: back home to become a nanny. Oh that story was boring, though, 59 00:03:11,760 --> 00:03:13,639 Speaker 2: so I told everyone at school you had to leave 60 00:03:13,680 --> 00:03:15,680 Speaker 2: because of alien hands syndrome. 61 00:03:15,919 --> 00:03:17,119 Speaker 1: Yeah. 62 00:03:17,240 --> 00:03:20,760 Speaker 3: I actually I would appreciate him. My life had come 63 00:03:20,800 --> 00:03:22,280 Speaker 3: to back living with my parents. 64 00:03:22,320 --> 00:03:24,800 Speaker 1: I'm like, please, who cares? It sounds cool? 65 00:03:24,880 --> 00:03:28,760 Speaker 4: He says, look it up. It's cool regardless. 66 00:03:28,760 --> 00:03:32,000 Speaker 2: You're probably wondering why I'm reaching out to you via Craigslist. 67 00:03:32,080 --> 00:03:35,320 Speaker 2: Now it turns out I actually made something of myself 68 00:03:35,600 --> 00:03:38,600 Speaker 2: and I work on the highway construction crew for the state. 69 00:03:39,560 --> 00:03:40,000 Speaker 2: Pretty cool. 70 00:03:40,080 --> 00:03:42,840 Speaker 4: And you'll never guess what my current project is. 71 00:03:43,080 --> 00:03:44,400 Speaker 1: Oh tell me, it's a triangle. 72 00:03:44,520 --> 00:03:50,400 Speaker 2: I'm making yield signs for them. I just wanted you 73 00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:52,320 Speaker 2: to know the dream lives on. 74 00:03:53,800 --> 00:03:56,200 Speaker 3: Every time I pass a road time, I'm gonna think 75 00:03:56,200 --> 00:03:57,960 Speaker 3: of the passion that goes down. 76 00:03:58,120 --> 00:03:59,040 Speaker 4: He says, hit me up. 77 00:03:59,080 --> 00:04:01,240 Speaker 2: For the reunion in a few years. Maybe we can 78 00:04:01,280 --> 00:04:05,560 Speaker 2: go together. That signed spoink Oh, I'm crazy that. 79 00:04:05,640 --> 00:04:06,960 Speaker 4: All came full trying. 80 00:04:08,640 --> 00:04:09,560 Speaker 1: Hit the three points. 81 00:04:09,960 --> 00:04:18,599 Speaker 2: This next misconnection is titled Boo Chicka Chihuahua. It says 82 00:04:18,720 --> 00:04:27,240 Speaker 2: man for woman seventies back patio palm Garden's retirement com Yes. Wait, 83 00:04:29,320 --> 00:04:32,480 Speaker 2: I was the one who found your blind chihuahua taking 84 00:04:32,920 --> 00:04:39,000 Speaker 2: a little bitty poopsy on my begonias. After a few 85 00:04:39,040 --> 00:04:42,680 Speaker 2: calls to neighbors, you came to collect your prize, and 86 00:04:42,800 --> 00:04:46,320 Speaker 2: you walked away with two your dog and a party 87 00:04:46,400 --> 00:04:48,360 Speaker 2: bag of your pooches misgiving. 88 00:04:49,920 --> 00:04:52,480 Speaker 1: He's gonna say, my heart, you gave her. 89 00:04:52,480 --> 00:04:54,800 Speaker 4: Back the dog dropping here go. 90 00:04:55,320 --> 00:04:59,400 Speaker 2: Our interaction was brief, I'll admit, but I believe you 91 00:04:59,560 --> 00:05:03,400 Speaker 2: noticed the canister of pepper spray in my hand just 92 00:05:03,440 --> 00:05:06,120 Speaker 2: in case our conversation didn't go right. 93 00:05:10,800 --> 00:05:13,200 Speaker 4: How could that conversation go that far south? 94 00:05:13,320 --> 00:05:15,960 Speaker 1: Like she was getting her doberman from your backyard? 95 00:05:16,240 --> 00:05:19,800 Speaker 2: After our tay de tay, I invited you inside for 96 00:05:19,920 --> 00:05:26,679 Speaker 2: some country crackers and some spiked coolie such weird stuff, 97 00:05:26,760 --> 00:05:29,640 Speaker 2: you declined, So I took off my shirt and said, 98 00:05:30,040 --> 00:05:32,640 Speaker 2: how about now, I feel like. 99 00:05:32,640 --> 00:05:35,479 Speaker 1: It took him five minutes to get else. 100 00:05:35,640 --> 00:05:39,040 Speaker 2: You coyly pretended to not hear me, but you did 101 00:05:39,120 --> 00:05:41,799 Speaker 2: look me up and down with your one good eye. 102 00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:46,000 Speaker 2: And after that, you proceeded to walk out my back gate. 103 00:05:46,560 --> 00:05:49,000 Speaker 2: And that's when I stopped you and said, hold on, 104 00:05:49,240 --> 00:05:52,240 Speaker 2: be careful. There's a trap door right in front of you, 105 00:05:53,440 --> 00:05:56,440 Speaker 2: and the only way out is through my bedroom. 106 00:05:58,920 --> 00:06:01,480 Speaker 4: Come you kept walking. 107 00:06:02,040 --> 00:06:05,279 Speaker 2: It's unfortunate because that line worked ninety percent of the 108 00:06:05,360 --> 00:06:06,599 Speaker 2: time in the eighties. 109 00:06:06,680 --> 00:06:12,080 Speaker 4: I swear tomorrow, let's try again. What else are you 110 00:06:12,120 --> 00:06:15,960 Speaker 4: gonna do? Let's be real. That signed Bruce. 111 00:06:16,520 --> 00:06:21,160 Speaker 1: Okay, even an old guy, he's gross. 112 00:06:21,320 --> 00:06:23,760 Speaker 4: I'm going to that retirement complex and saying, what's up? 113 00:06:24,120 --> 00:06:26,760 Speaker 4: Like a fun place? Misconnections has come to it, and. 114 00:06:26,880 --> 00:06:28,400 Speaker 1: Those are misconnections for the week. 115 00:06:28,760 --> 00:06:31,240 Speaker 4: I enjoyed it. We're gonna do a phone tap right 116 00:06:31,279 --> 00:06:31,680 Speaker 4: after this.