Speaker 1: We are tearing up my pod with singer, actor, film
Speaker 1: and television producer and fellow podcaster Lance Bass. Lance shares
Speaker 1: what it was like growing up in a boy band,
Speaker 1: if not the boy band, while holding onto a deep
Speaker 1: personal secret, to finding happiness in his true self, to
Speaker 1: how life has changed as a married father of twin
Speaker 1: sixteen month old babies. This is just me with Lance Bass. Hi,
Speaker 1: how are you? I? I'm well. I was thinking about
Speaker 1: how we know each other, and I kind of feel
Speaker 1: like we know each other. I feel like I really
Speaker 1: know you, but I don't. I met you years ago
Speaker 1: at Polo in the Hampton's and it was the day
Speaker 1: that I don't think you know this. That was the
Speaker 1: day that I ran into Jill Zarin and she was like,
Speaker 1: what are you doing here? Had you get the VIP bracelet?
Speaker 1: Where are the gift bags? And I was there hawking
Speaker 1: my Bethany bakes cookies, and I'm sure I hawked to you.
Speaker 1: And I couldn't even afford the ticket to get into that.
Speaker 1: That was Super Saturday. It was five hundred dollars and
Speaker 1: I finagled that. And then you smelled really good, and
Speaker 1: I asked you what you smelled like? And you were
Speaker 1: wearing Keels Musk and I then bought it. I loved
Speaker 1: it for years. That's my first understanding of meeting here.
Speaker 1: I love that because I thought our first. I don't
Speaker 1: even know if this was before that, but I remember
Speaker 1: at Chef Dance and Sundance. Oh you're right, then that
Speaker 1: might have been why I had the in to say
Speaker 1: hello to you. Yeah. Maybe, yeah, because I remember because
Speaker 1: I was just at Sundance. I'm like, oh, I think
Speaker 1: this is where I met Bethany. Stop it. Because Cheryl
Speaker 1: Hines just reminded me that she met me there, and
Speaker 1: she had a very funny point of view of like
Speaker 1: what I was like there. She's like, I didn't know
Speaker 1: who you were. I was sitting with Tim Robbins, and
Speaker 1: she said, but you were just like work in that
Speaker 1: room and you had a purpose and I didn't know
Speaker 1: what it was, but I knew that you were doing
Speaker 1: something that seemed important. That's what I thought I was.
Speaker 1: I was selling something that's funny. Um okay, so yeah,
Speaker 1: So I then ran into you then and always I
Speaker 1: felt like I've known you because I don't know. I
Speaker 1: feel like I've just seen you different places. But I
Speaker 1: really like you, and I'm really excited that you're doing
Speaker 1: the show. But I don't know a lot about your background.
Speaker 1: I don't know a lot about your life, and all
Speaker 1: I know is that you were in a very famous
Speaker 1: boy band, that you came out, that you got married
Speaker 1: to Michael Turchin, who was the name of someone that
Speaker 1: I went to college with and still have friends with.
Speaker 1: And I have twins. So you grew up in where
Speaker 1: is it? Miss Where did you grow up? So? I
Speaker 1: was born in a place called Laurel, Mississippi. Okay, watch
Speaker 1: that HGTV show called Hometown, But that's about so it's
Speaker 1: a very very teeny town. In fact, I was born there,
Speaker 1: but kind of raised right next door, five minutes away,
Speaker 1: in a little place called Ellasville, so town of two
Speaker 1: thousand people. So I grew up in the country. And
Speaker 1: do you go back and do you feel connected to
Speaker 1: it or does it feel like another planet? No? I do.
Speaker 1: I still feel very at home when I go back.
Speaker 1: All my family still lives there. I'm the only person
Speaker 1: to have escaped going on. But yeah, I get back
Speaker 1: at least three or four times a year, get to
Speaker 1: see my family and my grandparents. Now that we have kids,
Speaker 1: I try to bring them home as much as possible.
Speaker 1: And our saving grace is that we're right next to
Speaker 1: New Orleans, so we're about an hour and a half
Speaker 1: New Orleans. So I would be able to fly into
Speaker 1: New Orleans because it's a straight flight. Especially with kids,
Speaker 1: it's a lot easier to do that and then just
Speaker 1: drive to my family. So you dip in and out.
Speaker 1: You have a little bit of like real, real country
Speaker 1: and then a little bit of that exactly. It humbled you,
Speaker 1: for sure. And I still all my high school friends
Speaker 1: were very very close, so we're you know, we all
Speaker 1: keep in touch. There's a bunch of us, so we're
Speaker 1: always hanging out and there meet me in New Orleans
Speaker 1: a good bit too. Well. I guess there's probably so
Speaker 1: many people listening that are from small towns, Like what
Speaker 1: how do you get out? If there are movies about this?
Speaker 1: Like not that there's not anything wrong with living in
Speaker 1: a small town, but this is what people dream about, so,
Speaker 1: you know, getting out in the big wide world. How
Speaker 1: do you get out? I guess you just dream. I
Speaker 1: don't know's I was in such a small town and
Speaker 1: I didn't even know that you I didn't know I
Speaker 1: could ever go into entertainment or anything that I actually
Speaker 1: wanted to do because I don't know, just dreams never
Speaker 1: existed really first perfect me. So it was nothing I
Speaker 1: was really going for. It just kind of landed in
Speaker 1: my lap. And I find that happens to a lot
Speaker 1: of my friends in the business too, that yeah, they
Speaker 1: work hard, but the opportunity just kind of landed in
Speaker 1: their lap. And you know, the one that started with
Speaker 1: me was I was in high school. I was a
Speaker 1: junior in high school and the instinct guys were putting
Speaker 1: their you know, the band together in Orlando, and I
Speaker 1: Justin knew me through a vocal coach because he lived
Speaker 1: in Memphis and I lived around Jackson at that time,
Speaker 1: so the vocal coach would come down to Jackson and
Speaker 1: teach some kids. I was in another boy band called
Speaker 1: seven Card stud M. I wish like that name were
Speaker 1: there were seven of us. We would compete in state fairs,
Speaker 1: you know, just local, stupid, little you know group that
Speaker 1: we put together, never thinking we would ever do anything
Speaker 1: with it. U And then yeah, Justin called and said, hey,
Speaker 1: we're looking for a bass singer. I hear you're a
Speaker 1: great bass singer. Would you like to come join this
Speaker 1: group that we put together all started but you didn't know.
Speaker 1: But to that point you did find you did take
Speaker 1: one step at a time. It's a marathon, so you
Speaker 1: took you were at the first mile by knowing that
Speaker 1: you like to saying, and then joining something and then
Speaker 1: getting to get you know, these little things exponentially add up,
Speaker 1: so you were. It does and it prepared me because
Speaker 1: I just I was lucky enough to be in this
Speaker 1: town that it was the number one show choir in
Speaker 1: the world called Attache, And I didn't really know much
Speaker 1: about the show choir world, but it is intense. I
Speaker 1: mean it's like it's the Olympics and so it's these
Speaker 1: high school kids that I don't know how they come
Speaker 1: together and do all the singing and dancing is so synchronized.
Speaker 1: But my director, David Fair, he was just one of
Speaker 1: those just asshole directors that I mean just made everyone
Speaker 1: cry and just such a hard ass. But he's the
Speaker 1: one who really instilled what I needed to have in
Speaker 1: me to get into this business. That's funny because I
Speaker 1: had an English teacher that was a nightmare and ended
Speaker 1: up getting fired because of this, Like to the point
Speaker 1: where people felt that it was almost bullying. Where you
Speaker 1: would you would do a math, I mean English, you
Speaker 1: would do an English, there'd be a question and you
Speaker 1: might get the whole thing right grammatically, but if maybe
Speaker 1: you spelled something wrong and that wasn't even what the
Speaker 1: whole thing was about, you get all these points off.
Speaker 1: He was just like evil. You could never get close
Speaker 1: to getting an A. But I learned everything from him.
Speaker 1: And it's funny that you say that. Yeah though, So
Speaker 1: that's an interesting thing about us coddling our kids and
Speaker 1: wrapping them in bubble wrap, you know, and you know
Speaker 1: obviously understand what's going on when you're that young. But
Speaker 1: the fact that now I could deal with anyone in
Speaker 1: this business and I got this, I'm good, that's amazing.
Speaker 1: I gotta go back and find this guy's name. That's
Speaker 1: amazing because I feel the same exact way. Um So, now,
Speaker 1: how long was the whole in sync ride? We got
Speaker 1: together in nineteen ninety five, okay, and then it took
Speaker 1: us a good year to get recognized in our record deal.
Speaker 1: I mean it was a it was a long journey
Speaker 1: for us. Remember I wouldn't sign us at all, so
Speaker 1: we actually signed to a German label in Munich. So
Speaker 1: we were a German band two years before we came
Speaker 1: to America and then we Yeah, we came to America
Speaker 1: in nineteen ninety eight, and then it just blew up.
Speaker 1: I mean, Germany was huge for us. We got to
Speaker 1: America and it was a slow role. We came out
Speaker 1: with I Want You Back, and it was like, all right,
Speaker 1: you know, it did okay, it hit the top forty maybe,
Speaker 1: But then we did a Disney special that aired every
Speaker 1: day for three months, and that's what just blew us
Speaker 1: up in America. So just overnight it felt like we
Speaker 1: were the biggest band in the world. Wow. Yeah. And
Speaker 1: it just did not stop until we took our hiatus
Speaker 1: in two thousand and two or two thousand and three. Yeah,
Speaker 1: oh okay. So the question I have, well, were you
Speaker 1: making money or was it these cliche situations with these
Speaker 1: boy bands and the managers where you don't know what
Speaker 1: the hell you're signing and you just want to be
Speaker 1: part of it, you don't make anything. Yeah, we would
Speaker 1: be the picture, you know, in the dictionary of being
Speaker 1: screwed in the business. Yeah, we didn't make any money
Speaker 1: really within sync Glue Prolman, you know, took all of that,
Speaker 1: So we had the worst deal in music history US
Speaker 1: and the Bactory Boys we had the same deal. They
Speaker 1: just kind of scratched out the names, right, But yeah,
Speaker 1: so we didn't we didn't really make too much during
Speaker 1: the end sync base. Yeah, and I have funny because
Speaker 1: it's hard to find a parallel between boy bands and
Speaker 1: the housewives, but they're both campy, sometimes cheesy, cultural phenomenons
Speaker 1: where you get these breakout characters and you really I
Speaker 1: made seven thousand, two hundred and fifty dollars the first season,
Speaker 1: and sometimes you're a little embarrassed, but you also revel
Speaker 1: in it and you love it and it's where you
Speaker 1: came from. And then you're trying to extend How do
Speaker 1: you extend the fifteen minutes of that, right, because it's
Speaker 1: you know, some people don't think it's you're not real.
Speaker 1: You know, it's not real. It's not real music, it's
Speaker 1: not real television, it's not real entertainment. Right, I mean,
Speaker 1: there are some parallels. So how do you did you
Speaker 1: have a plan to extend or you just always went
Speaker 1: with your passion? Like what were you thinking about it
Speaker 1: when it ended? And had did you, you know, evolve
Speaker 1: that into what your career is now, which is varied. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's uh, we well when it ended, I didn't know
Speaker 1: it was ending, uh you know, so we were literally
Speaker 1: just taking a six month hiatus. That's when I was
Speaker 1: asked to go to space. So I went over to
Speaker 1: Russia and I trained to become a cosmonaut during those
Speaker 1: six months. And while I was over there in Russia,
Speaker 1: you know, living on a military base with zero communication,
Speaker 1: I knew I had this limited amount of time to
Speaker 1: in order, you know, to do this mission. So I
Speaker 1: had exactly six months and I had to be back
Speaker 1: November first, and so my mission ended up getting scrapped
Speaker 1: at the last minute, and they wanted it extended and say, well,
Speaker 1: you can fly in April, and I'm like, no, I
Speaker 1: have to have to go back. I have to be
Speaker 1: back in November first to start this new album. And
Speaker 1: then I get back and there was nothing to come
Speaker 1: back to. So, you know, the hiatus kept getting extended
Speaker 1: and extended. So I wasn't really thinking about what is
Speaker 1: my next move, what am I supposed to do because
Speaker 1: I didn't think there was a second How old were
Speaker 1: you then, and what were you told was the reason
Speaker 1: for the hiatus. Um I think I was twenty three,
Speaker 1: and yeah, it was Justin was doing a solo album. Um,
Speaker 1: that didn't he didn't. He didn't think that it would
Speaker 1: blow up so much and so quickly. So he wanted
Speaker 1: to do the solo album on during our right, and
Speaker 1: then when we came back, it just kept getting bigger
Speaker 1: and bigger and bigger, and so you know, and he
Speaker 1: became Justin Timberlake. So there was no there was no
Speaker 1: way we were going to stop that role. Right. It
Speaker 1: still hasn't it today? Fascinating? And what about what about
Speaker 1: being gay in the South and a tiny town, or
Speaker 1: knowing you're gay, probably saying you're not gay and coming
Speaker 1: out and what about that whole piece of yea and
Speaker 1: being a boy band and being gay? Yeah, God's little
Speaker 1: joke put me in a boy band. Yes, your audience
Speaker 1: is cute girls. Yeah, you get to be in a
Speaker 1: boy band. I mean yeah, but no, it was it
Speaker 1: was scary for sure. You know, it was a different time. Um,
Speaker 1: you know, twenty years ago, you know this the country
Speaker 1: was just did not like gay people. It was very
Speaker 1: scary because you would get examples of like Ellen degenerous
Speaker 1: and so how she was treated when she came out,
Speaker 1: and just everyone when you come out, you lose your job,
Speaker 1: not only in entertainment but in any other, you know
Speaker 1: job in this world. I mean, you were easily could
Speaker 1: just get fired for being gay. Um we didn't have
Speaker 1: any really good positive examples of the LGBT community when
Speaker 1: it comes to work. Um. So, and what you were marketing,
Speaker 1: who you were, your target audience were, we'd be wiping
Speaker 1: that out exactly, and you just felt like you're lying,
Speaker 1: which I was lying, but you know it was it
Speaker 1: was entertainment. So yeah, I knew I was gay at
Speaker 1: five years old. I knew it was something I'd have
Speaker 1: to hide my whole life because especially then I was
Speaker 1: super religious. So I was that kid that always would
Speaker 1: go to bed and try to pray the gay away
Speaker 1: and please next morning, I don't want to be gay,
Speaker 1: but in that just kind of that was your daily
Speaker 1: life for as long as I remember, is just thinking
Speaker 1: about I have to hide this, I have to hide
Speaker 1: this because if I don't, I mean I really could die,
Speaker 1: Like someone could kill me. That's how you felt. Torture.
Speaker 1: That sounds like absolute, Like that literally sounds like torment,
Speaker 1: mental emotional, physical torment. Yeah, and it got really bad
Speaker 1: when you know, you hit puberty and everyone's dating, and
Speaker 1: you know, you're starting to want to have a relationship,
Speaker 1: and you start touring around with you know, straight relationships.
Speaker 1: And I had a girlfriend that I really thought I loved,
Speaker 1: but not knowing what love truly felt like, right, but yeah,
Speaker 1: you know, and then all the guys you know, go
Speaker 1: home to their girlfriends and we have like a day
Speaker 1: off or something, and then I have to make excuses
Speaker 1: of why I haven't met someone, and you know, keeping
Speaker 1: that secret from your four best friends that obviously know
Speaker 1: something's up. You know, they're not stupid. Um, But I
Speaker 1: just thought if even if I told those guys that
Speaker 1: all our careers would be over, they would hate me
Speaker 1: and the over. So you were, you had it going
Speaker 1: many different directions, like and how much did you see
Speaker 1: in your small town environment other people that were gay
Speaker 1: that you felt were going through the same thing. Um, well,
Speaker 1: there were zero in my town. Um. And even when
Speaker 1: I moved to the next town that had you know,
Speaker 1: fifteen thousand people, there still was no there was zero
Speaker 1: out people. Um. But you know, there was one kid
Speaker 1: in our class that was very obviously you know gay. Um,
Speaker 1: and people wouldn't, you know, make fun of them, and
Speaker 1: they're the jokes. You know that it was never in
Speaker 1: danger because everyone just kind of assumed whatever. But uh,
Speaker 1: but the jokes everyone would make would just make me
Speaker 1: feel so uncomfortable, and that even made me go deeper
Speaker 1: in the closet, you know, for people thinking. And I
Speaker 1: was telling me the realty as I knew I would
Speaker 1: never be able to. And then now because I am
Speaker 1: so close as a lot of my high school friends,
Speaker 1: there are several of us that have come out, you know,
Speaker 1: and so there was very oh yeah yeah. And that
Speaker 1: guy in particular just came out just a few years
Speaker 1: ago and living his best life. It's amazing because I,
Speaker 1: you know, in my lifetime in my high school, I
Speaker 1: remember the guy the girl that just seemed different because
Speaker 1: someone in our high school being gay wasn't even something
Speaker 1: that we even that we thought about, Like it was
Speaker 1: just like I didn't even know to think that he
Speaker 1: was gay. He just was very very de dressed, very flamboyant,
Speaker 1: and very you know, alternative and to what everybody else
Speaker 1: was doing. And I but I just didn't think that
Speaker 1: I knew my high school was gay. It wasn't something.
Speaker 1: It wasn't a conversation. To your point, it wasn't a
Speaker 1: conversation exactly at all. That's crazy. Yeah, it's amazing And
Speaker 1: in my high school, Um, so did you try to
Speaker 1: disassociate from boyband life? Did you? Did you? Did you
Speaker 1: revel in it? Do you know what I'm saying? Like
Speaker 1: now I'm doing a podcast called Rewives where I'm really
Speaker 1: appreciating and reflecting on it in a different way versus
Speaker 1: just having left it and being wanting to like have
Speaker 1: it be over there. I'm coming at it in an
Speaker 1: entirely different way that I like bo my term. So
Speaker 1: I'm wondering if you had that moment where you wanted
Speaker 1: to like not be the boyband guy and be something different,
Speaker 1: but then appreciated it because it's such a great thing
Speaker 1: in history and history. I think the same way. You know,
Speaker 1: at first, you know, when I was trying to figure
Speaker 1: out where do I belong in the entertainment, I was
Speaker 1: embarrassed to be part of the boy band world, because,
Speaker 1: especially then, now people admittedly love boy bands guys, do
Speaker 1: you know, It's kind of like a fun thing now
Speaker 1: And I think the word boy band has evolved into
Speaker 1: so many different groups like Boys, the Men and even
Speaker 1: the Beatles, like everyone's kind of gather now. But uh,
Speaker 1: you know then it was I we got made fun
Speaker 1: of so much. The music industry did not like us.
Speaker 1: They used us for ratings, but they didn't like That's
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. I feel they sam it's exact way
Speaker 1: like nobody takes anybody seriously. Who's on the Housewives, But
Speaker 1: but they're all watching, and it's people are making more
Speaker 1: money than people in real entertainment. It's interesting saying take
Speaker 1: an advantage of us, saying, oh, this is like kid music,
Speaker 1: it's not real. You know, we were writing ourself. Our
Speaker 1: music was great, and then you start to well, maybe
Speaker 1: we are horrible, maybe we aren't talented. You know, you
Speaker 1: start like believing what these people were saying. You know,
Speaker 1: when the Grammys nominate you nine times and they don't
Speaker 1: give you one, but they're gonna make you perform every
Speaker 1: time to make sure people are watching. But it's just yes,
Speaker 1: you know, we were just not taken seriously at all.
Speaker 1: I think today we actually would be. And you know,
Speaker 1: I think because now you're looking at those that young
Speaker 1: generation of the Justin Bieber's and the Taylor swifts and
Speaker 1: you know they get all the accolades. You know, they
Speaker 1: all you know, people really respect them in the business
Speaker 1: right now are back in our day, you know, teenage
Speaker 1: groups and pop stars like Britney Spears and you know
Speaker 1: Christina Aguilera just didn't get their their dues because well, kids,
Speaker 1: it's funny. This is not the exact same by any means.
Speaker 1: Back in my day, celebrities didn't hold alcohol. You put
Speaker 1: your drink down before you took a picture. And then
Speaker 1: skinny Girl comes out and everybody's got a liquor brand.
Speaker 1: Everybody's got a looker brand because now you know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. Back then, nobody would have a liquor brand
Speaker 1: that would be So it's just funny how things evolve.
Speaker 1: One person does it and then it becomes a whole
Speaker 1: new times true and then you cool. Then you get smart.
Speaker 1: You're like, wait a minute, why aren't we making this
Speaker 1: money like everyone else is doing so like it likes
Speaker 1: to you. You know, people are looking at things a
Speaker 1: different way, like, wait a minute, because this is a
Speaker 1: fine nite amount of time that I'm going to be
Speaker 1: on this TV show or doing this you know this music.
Speaker 1: You have to figure out, how are you going to
Speaker 1: set yourself up for the rest of your life? Exactly.
Speaker 1: It's so confusing to me being in a band like
Speaker 1: that where no one took me seriously, you know, and
Speaker 1: I was more interested in TV and film. I always
Speaker 1: wire was, so you know, I would always produce and
Speaker 1: I love writing, you know, TV and film. But going
Speaker 1: into an industry like TV and film coming from this
Speaker 1: boy band era was not an easy transition because no, yeah,
Speaker 1: they just like, yeah, I think you leaning into it though,
Speaker 1: That's what I'm saying, Like every we all get caught
Speaker 1: up in impostor syndrome. Yeah. I mean when I was
Speaker 1: talking to Paul, my fiance, a couple of years ago,
Speaker 1: and he was like, I didn't know what to rewatch.
Speaker 1: I've never listened to a podcast. I don't listen to
Speaker 1: so he said, they're doing these rewatch podcasts and I said,
Speaker 1: I don't know what that is. And he's like, they're
Speaker 1: doing I don't know if it was Scrubs or I
Speaker 1: forgot what he was saying. And he's like, you got
Speaker 1: someone is going to do this with the housewives And
Speaker 1: I said, right, but like that's lame, Like am I
Speaker 1: doing that? And he was like, I don't know, you're
Speaker 1: that changes on the floor who But he said this,
Speaker 1: I would never say this about myself. He's like, people
Speaker 1: want to hear Tom Brady talk about the game. They
Speaker 1: don't want to hear some like Fifth String House if
Speaker 1: you should be talking about the housewives from the inside
Speaker 1: and the outside. So I finally it took me a
Speaker 1: while to lean into it. And it's massively successful, and
Speaker 1: I'm thinking, why was I being the way that you
Speaker 1: are about the boy band thing? You know, like lean in?
Speaker 1: You know, so it's true and you know people, You
Speaker 1: got to give the people what they want, and yes,
Speaker 1: thank you, don't don't live in the past. So I
Speaker 1: was always afraid to do a show like Frosted Tips
Speaker 1: where we just talk about boy bands. But the fans
Speaker 1: love it and because yeah, you know the stories. It
Speaker 1: might be boring to you, but to the fandoms, they're like,
Speaker 1: oh my gosh, they've never heard this story before and
Speaker 1: it's just so exciting for them. Thank you exactly. I
Speaker 1: didn't understand it. It's so niche, But that's kind of
Speaker 1: what TikTok is, and I know you love TikTok. Somebody
Speaker 1: could be organizing buttons, and there's an audience talk about
Speaker 1: seaweed like it's niche. So there's a lot of niche
Speaker 1: content out there right now, and you seem to like
Speaker 1: it as as do I. It's just nuanced. So talk
Speaker 1: about while you're tired, like you have two kids now,
Speaker 1: and I mean tired because of being a parent. But
Speaker 1: I just had this entertainment lawyer on the phone today
Speaker 1: and he was like, you know, we could really build
Speaker 1: this into this, and we could do that into that
Speaker 1: and blah blah blah, and I go and I say
Speaker 1: this five times a week. It's a deal that's almost
Speaker 1: gonna knock O through. I don't care that didn't happen,
Speaker 1: that didn get picked up. I don't care at all.
Speaker 1: I really am the person that's like I looked at
Speaker 1: my balance. I'm good. I don't want to be a billionaire.
Speaker 1: I come on here, I say whatever the fuck I want,
Speaker 1: and I'm happy if it rolls in and it knocks
Speaker 1: on the door and it's a bag of cash wrapped
Speaker 1: in a bow, put it over here and I'll take it,
Speaker 1: and I'll be happy to take that pile. But other
Speaker 1: than that, I'm good. I am right, and it took
Speaker 1: me years to get to that level. I'm like, what
Speaker 1: am I doing? Like? Why am I running myself so ragged?
Speaker 1: Traveling all the time? Yes, the big when I could
Speaker 1: just like enjoy my life. Yes, do you like it's
Speaker 1: gonna come to you? If it doesn't get developed? Great? Fine, whatever,
Speaker 1: I'm good. I am good. Yeah, it's so true. Do
Speaker 1: you mind if you're younger than I? Do you mind
Speaker 1: if I ask cold you are? Yet you're young? So yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm ten years older than used to think about how
Speaker 1: you feel now? And I'm just it's just like people choose.
Speaker 1: I see these people. I see these celebrities. I see
Speaker 1: filling the calendar and we gotta go there, and we
Speaker 1: gotta go here. And their identity is how busy they
Speaker 1: are and the running. And I think that definitely you
Speaker 1: having twins definitely stopped you in your tracks. But you know,
Speaker 1: the learning, the power of no, That's what I learned.
Speaker 1: Once I started saying no to all these things, everything
Speaker 1: came to me like all the quality, the quality just
Speaker 1: went way up. Same once I learned that, I'm like, Okay,
Speaker 1: I'm good. The universe is gonna give me what I
Speaker 1: need and I can actually enjoy my life. Same. It's clean,
Speaker 1: it's lean, it's less is more, and it's quality. It's
Speaker 1: so true, and you become the least interested party who
Speaker 1: usually wins. Yeah. Um, So Michael Turchin, how did you
Speaker 1: meet him? And what does he do and I don't?
Speaker 1: And what's your cope? What's your parenting style and what's
Speaker 1: your uni Yang? Like, who's who in the relationship. You're
Speaker 1: the peacock, I guess. Yeah, yeah, We're definitely are opposite people.
Speaker 1: I'm you know, I'm just very out there and I
Speaker 1: talked too much and he's just very reserved and quiet.
Speaker 1: But it works. We met twelve years ago. Was our
Speaker 1: first date at Super Bowl? Um, and so Michael, come
Speaker 1: say hi, he's right here. Uh we met yeah super Bowl?
Speaker 1: Well we met before that, but our first date was
Speaker 1: Super Bowl twelve years ago. Hi, my god, Hi, have
Speaker 1: you ever met before? I feel like we have, but
Speaker 1: I don't remember where have we ever met? I think
Speaker 1: maybe in passing brief Now, this is the guy you
Speaker 1: need on on HOUSEWF stuff. He is like, he knows,
Speaker 1: he knows the thing that is his sport, his football.
Speaker 1: So you had a date at Super Bowl. You met
Speaker 1: at Super Bowl. No, it was our It was our
Speaker 1: first date at super Bowl. Nice to see babies are
Speaker 1: crying now in the back. Oh, you texted and said, hey,
Speaker 1: we're both going to be at super Bowl. Explained, well,
Speaker 1: we so we oddly Halloween before, two different days, two
Speaker 1: different outfits. We have pictures together, but our friends never
Speaker 1: introduced us. So I have pictures with him, but I
Speaker 1: never met him. Okay. Then two months later, we're at
Speaker 1: a friend's birthday party in Palm Springs and that's when
Speaker 1: I really met him and we had a good, like
Speaker 1: fifteen minute conversation. I was heading back to Los Angeles
Speaker 1: and then on my way back to LA he facebook
Speaker 1: poked me, yeah, do you remember that thing? Yeah, And
Speaker 1: then we just kind of started a conversation and we
Speaker 1: spent every day together as best friends. Because I didn't
Speaker 1: think he liked me, so I was like, you know what,
Speaker 1: I need to become really good friends with this guy.
Speaker 1: So I get over the attraction. And then super Bowl
Speaker 1: came around, and you know, we kind of went out
Speaker 1: that day and it was kind of a date, but
Speaker 1: I didn't know if it was a date. Ended up
Speaker 1: being a date. So yeah, And how long ago was
Speaker 1: that that was twelve years ago. And is he in
Speaker 1: the entertainment industry? No, he is a he's a painter.
Speaker 1: He does pop art like a really is behind the hand. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's his and I like that a lot. It reminds
Speaker 1: me of something and I can't think of what they're
Speaker 1: all his. He's getting ready for the La Art show
Speaker 1: this week. So, I mean this house is just covered
Speaker 1: and glittered. That's amazing. Wow. Okay, And so what about
Speaker 1: the choice to have kids? Was we're both of you
Speaker 1: on board and twins? Like what is that whole process? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Well I knew that he wanted a family just like
Speaker 1: myself early old relationship, so that that was good because
Speaker 1: I knew I always wanted to have kids. But when
Speaker 1: we met, you know, we couldn't even get married, we
Speaker 1: couldn't definitely couldn't adopt in a lot of places. Um So,
Speaker 1: and I didn't really understand what surrogacy was an IVF,
Speaker 1: you know, I never really heard of that before. So,
Speaker 1: you know, about seven years ago when we started talking
Speaker 1: about maybe having kids and learning what surrogacy was, um
Speaker 1: and then it took us about five years to actually
Speaker 1: get our kids. We went through a hell of a
Speaker 1: time you know, figure out, you know, how it is
Speaker 1: going to happen. We went through so many different donors.
Speaker 1: We were pregnant with twins before, but then lost them
Speaker 1: around like six weeks. So you know, it was spinning
Speaker 1: both of your sperm and then it's IVF with the
Speaker 1: So yeah, the kids looked like both of you exactly.
Speaker 1: So we split the eggs, you know, so you know,
Speaker 1: had a certain amount of eggs. We split them and
Speaker 1: we would you know, make embryos half his half mine,
Speaker 1: and then we put uh, you know, because you can
Speaker 1: tell the viability of the egg of the embryos, so
Speaker 1: they'll put the healthiest girl in and we put the
Speaker 1: healthiest boy in. And so we were like hoping that,
Speaker 1: you know, because a lot of times only one sticks,
Speaker 1: but we were just hoping both with stick and they did,
Speaker 1: and that's how we got Alexander and Violet. You have
Speaker 1: a girl and a boy. That is so And how
Speaker 1: old are they now? They're sixteen months now. Oh so
Speaker 1: you're still full? Oh they're babies. Oh you're fully in it.
Speaker 1: That's wow. All tired right now? Oh wow, i'man Well, congratulations,
Speaker 1: that's beautiful. That's I'd say. We hit the jackpot because
Speaker 1: they're beyond it's good. I mean they're so great beyond.
Speaker 1: That's so nice. And your whole family takes on a
Speaker 1: whole different identity and path and all of that. And
Speaker 1: so you're active in environmental philanthropy. How did you choose that?
Speaker 1: Because like, I do disaster relief and it's just interesting
Speaker 1: the road that we end up on, and so many
Speaker 1: things are important. So environmental philanthropy, how did you land
Speaker 1: on that? Well, as you know, I was so I
Speaker 1: love charity, right, and especially when you're young and in
Speaker 1: the business, you're always being asked to do do this, this, this,
Speaker 1: and you're like, yes, yes, but then you get so full,
Speaker 1: so thin, that nothing really matters anymore. You're like, am
Speaker 1: I even helping at all? Yes? You know, you're donating
Speaker 1: here and there to make yourself a but I mean
Speaker 1: not doing anything anything. They're happy. They think it's awareness.
Speaker 1: You feel like a fraud. I feel get it. Well,
Speaker 1: what are you doing? Like are you making an impact?
Speaker 1: So yeah, you know, it's choosing those things that you
Speaker 1: really like. Okay, I feel like I can do an
Speaker 1: impact here. Um. And so with environmental you know, media association,
Speaker 1: which you know I chair, Uh, it's it's been so great,
Speaker 1: And it was really young. I was probably twenties five
Speaker 1: or twenty six when I moved to LA and I
Speaker 1: was at a dinner party and the CEO of the
Speaker 1: EMAS was there and they gave a presentation like, oh
Speaker 1: my gosh, I never, I never, I never really cared
Speaker 1: about the planet. Sadly, I just did not care. I
Speaker 1: didn't know what the problems were. I remember the ozone
Speaker 1: you know, hole that we had in the eighties that
Speaker 1: we all you know got together and fixed that, but
Speaker 1: I didn't realize how dangerous it was getting for our planet.
Speaker 1: Can you see out of the bullshit? Right? Like so much,
Speaker 1: but I also find it challenging. And this isn't I'm
Speaker 1: not even going to give a disclaimer to me saying
Speaker 1: and not you. It was just something on TikTok with
Speaker 1: Rihanna saying, like I used to use a lot of
Speaker 1: wipes and no more. I have to care about this planet.
Speaker 1: But then I'm thinking about fenty beauty and all the
Speaker 1: plastic and all the stuff, and is it all refillable?
Speaker 1: And I'm not even judging her, but like, there's a
Speaker 1: lot of bullshit. You're not using wipes but you're producing
Speaker 1: endless plastic shit that all these people are buying, you know,
Speaker 1: all this stuff. So I'm just saying, everybody's talking out
Speaker 1: of both sides of their mouth with the environment, and
Speaker 1: every little bit does help, but it's the big things
Speaker 1: that we have to go after first. You know, all
Speaker 1: these huge corporations with their carbon emissions, and it really
Speaker 1: kind of it starts with Congress too. I mean, it's
Speaker 1: really trying to get all these bills passed, and you
Speaker 1: know how impossible that is, you know, I mean we
Speaker 1: you know, had the last president in place, we couldn't
Speaker 1: do anything at Ama. We couldn't even really post things like,
Speaker 1: they would not allow us to do anything. They were
Speaker 1: so environment because you know, climate changes is a fraud,
Speaker 1: you know. They although we have every single bit of
Speaker 1: information about how this planet is warming way too quickly
Speaker 1: and it's basically passed the point of no return at
Speaker 1: this point. But the fact that people can't see physically
Speaker 1: all these crazy storms and what's happening to this planet.
Speaker 1: Oh my, you should talk to my partner Michael, who's
Speaker 1: in Turkey and Syria doing relief work, and he told
Speaker 1: me we were in Guatemala, it was after Hurricane Mario.
Speaker 1: We had done a lot of work there, and then
Speaker 1: we were in Guatemala there was all volcano erupted and
Speaker 1: he said as if he was like, no stre damas.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna give Michael Caponi the credit. He said, we
Speaker 1: are about to see a series of storms and weather
Speaker 1: patterns the likes that we have never seen. Because I
Speaker 1: started relief work with Hurricane Harvey and that was a
Speaker 1: big Katrina, and then Hurricane Harvey that was a big deal.
Speaker 1: Then people thought that was a big deal. That's nothing.
Speaker 1: Now like literally, oh Harvey, it was nothing compared to area.
Speaker 1: Then there were fires in our store. I'm just saying
Speaker 1: it's been a very weird, energetic world weather disaster pattern time.
Speaker 1: It's like these aren't headlines because there are too many.
Speaker 1: There have been too many storms and things like that. Well,
Speaker 1: when you do disaster relief, you're so you're happy, but
Speaker 1: you feel like a loser because like it's not even
Speaker 1: a drop in the bucket and you twenty million dollars
Speaker 1: in aid right now in Turkey and you still feel
Speaker 1: like doing anything like we do and we are, but
Speaker 1: like it's hard, so you must feel like are we
Speaker 1: doing anything we're doing it, but are we It must
Speaker 1: be very defeating in a way as inspiring it is.
Speaker 1: It really is. And the older you get in your priority,
Speaker 1: especially like having kids, it's like, do I have the
Speaker 1: energy to do this anymore? It's like, now, can the
Speaker 1: younger generation pickup where we left and just take over?
Speaker 1: Because it's just so tiring, so tiring. Well, that's the thing.
Speaker 1: You have to make sure that other people will do
Speaker 1: it the same passion as you have, because I used
Speaker 1: to go to every single disaster and then Paul would
Speaker 1: say to me and I'd say, it's it's not right.
Speaker 1: I'm not right now in Ukraine, but we've raised millions
Speaker 1: and millions I have raised, and He's like, I don't
Speaker 1: think the president of Coca Cola needs to be putting
Speaker 1: every all the syrup in the bottles. Like I actually
Speaker 1: feel guilty because today I'm on Fox News talking about
Speaker 1: Turkey and raising money and my entire team is there.
Speaker 1: I'm not there, but they are doing God's work and
Speaker 1: I'm just now the sort of messenger manager, the head
Speaker 1: of the whole thing. And I feel tremendous guilt about
Speaker 1: it because I feel like I'm it's I'm an impostor. No,
Speaker 1: well that's definitely not true. I mean, what do you
Speaker 1: have done for these disasters is just insane, And there
Speaker 1: needs to be that person that manages it all. You
Speaker 1: don't have to be the person on the front line.
Speaker 1: I know you get it though, you get what I'm saying,
Speaker 1: of course, Yeah, yeah, I understand that guilt for sure.
Speaker 1: But yeah, but the one person that's there is obviously
Speaker 1: not going to be as effective as here. But anyway, affective,
Speaker 1: who cares? I mean I care? But okay, so what
Speaker 1: else are you working on now? Like what if I
Speaker 1: had to if I ran into you, if I was
Speaker 1: on a plane with you and said, like, what do
Speaker 1: you do? What would you say? Like, what do you?
Speaker 1: What's your job now? Well, I mean basically TV and
Speaker 1: film has been my baby for a while. Have lots
Speaker 1: of films being made right now, a lot of TV
Speaker 1: shows that you're acting in or producing also, Oh, kind
Speaker 1: of back and forth. I can't decide. Every time. I'm like,
Speaker 1: you know what, I love being behind the camera. This
Speaker 1: is like where I belong. I love this, I love creating.
Speaker 1: And then all of a sudden I'll get like all
Speaker 1: these offers for like these movies and like, well, okay,
Speaker 1: I guess I'm gonna be an actor this year. But honestly,
Speaker 1: I love it all. So as long as I can
Speaker 1: do both, I'm very happy. So, and what kind of
Speaker 1: characters are you playing? Are you ever playing yourself? A
Speaker 1: lot of the time, I mean, especially with TV, they're like, oh,
Speaker 1: we want you to do you know, blah blah blah
Speaker 1: blah blah, And I'm like, great, what's the character? Like? Oh, yourself,
Speaker 1: but the exaggerated version of yourself. I'm like, okay, I've
Speaker 1: played the aerated version of myself I don't know how
Speaker 1: many times, but this year is gonna be yourself? Isn't
Speaker 1: even yourself anymore? Like anymore? Yeah? I don't. It's a
Speaker 1: character that's so funny. Very few people are like the
Speaker 1: caricature of themselves. That's really interesting. I mean, it's so true.
Speaker 1: But this year I do have a couple of movies,
Speaker 1: great comedies that I actually get to really act in,
Speaker 1: so that'll that'll be fun. And then I've just been
Speaker 1: loving going back in front of the microphone. You know,
Speaker 1: I've had radio shows before, but with Froust to Tips,
Speaker 1: it's going to be It's been really fun. But also
Speaker 1: we're getting into scripted podcast which is kind of the
Speaker 1: new thing. And as a producer, it's really fun because
Speaker 1: you can take your ideas that you create and write,
Speaker 1: you can make a scripted podcast of us, so you
Speaker 1: actually get to hear what it is and then take
Speaker 1: that to the studio and be like, well, here's the
Speaker 1: show you cant No. One of my favorites is coming
Speaker 1: out now. Yeah. It's called The Last Soviet and it's
Speaker 1: a scripted podcast about a true story about the this
Speaker 1: cosmonaut who was stuck in space when communism fell And
Speaker 1: oh wow, fascinating to like just to relive that history
Speaker 1: through my cosmonaut's eyes and show you, like just how
Speaker 1: everything is so political, even space. But that has been
Speaker 1: very it's such a great show. What is a cosmonaut?
Speaker 1: A cosmonaut is a Russian astronaut, So oh okay, oh okay,
Speaker 1: got it. Wow, that's I like that. That's so interesting. Yeah,
Speaker 1: And you didn't mention music, which is so funny because
Speaker 1: and I read in some of the research I did
Speaker 1: that people always ask you about the getting the band
Speaker 1: back together. And I did see at the Backstreet Boys
Speaker 1: at the iHeart Awards and I did think of you
Speaker 1: and this and think, wait, why that was so? It
Speaker 1: was the best part of the jingle ball. It was
Speaker 1: so iconic and so fun and can't be in alive?
Speaker 1: And I thought, and what is the answer? You will
Speaker 1: guys will do that? Or now? I mean, who knows?
Speaker 1: We've been talking about it for twenty years, And I mean, well,
Speaker 1: why who? Why don't you organize it? That's so you? Um,
Speaker 1: you would think I'd be the one, but no, I'm
Speaker 1: so music really burnt me out, Like I didn't have
Speaker 1: the best experience in the music industry. So I just
Speaker 1: kind of cut that out. And with my guys, like
Speaker 1: we're very all five of us, very opinionated. It's like
Speaker 1: herding cats with us. It is very, very hard to
Speaker 1: get us decide on anything. Let me ask you a
Speaker 1: stupid question. What would have to be decided upon? Like,
Speaker 1: aren't wouldn't there just be a series of events Like
Speaker 1: wouldn't you guys just say, yeah, of course, we're gonna
Speaker 1: perform together at the Irheart Awards and perform these songs
Speaker 1: that we've all performed together. Yeah, Like and does it
Speaker 1: have to be with everybody? Like what if if? So
Speaker 1: let's say justin didn't want to do it obviously, or
Speaker 1: maybe like what does he have to be in it?
Speaker 1: It's just you know, one guy thinks that you know,
Speaker 1: they're purist, it has to be all five and you know,
Speaker 1: I don't think that. Do you think that the Beatles
Speaker 1: have had multiple different members and the Rolling Stones? No? No,
Speaker 1: I mean I don't think that at all. I mean
Speaker 1: every single band it has different iterations, is you know right?
Speaker 1: They get legacy bands always do that. Um. But yeah,
Speaker 1: and this is giving people what they want. This is
Speaker 1: effectively it could be almost none of you in it,
Speaker 1: but it happens to have you like you want to
Speaker 1: give them what they want. You could almost be the
Speaker 1: caricature versions of yourself doing it. Yes, I mean we
Speaker 1: could be holograms at this point. Just you know, the
Speaker 1: fantais want to hear the music and see the dancing.
Speaker 1: I would love. I'm literally calling connal Burne from iHeart
Speaker 1: and saying, can you please get them get them back
Speaker 1: together because the iHeart Awards. I mean, I don't say never,
Speaker 1: say never, but I think it's exhausting. It's not one night,
Speaker 1: it's a whole thing. And well, and that's the thing.
Speaker 1: If we did it again. It would have to be
Speaker 1: world tour, new album, like it would be fully exhausting
Speaker 1: to be a one off thing. So yeah, that's so true. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but let me ask you, is Backstreet Boys making fuck
Speaker 1: you money or just good money? Major fuck you money?
Speaker 1: So that's the thing, And thank god because just like us,
Speaker 1: they got screwed through Lou Proman right, and by the
Speaker 1: time their career started kind of going down, they were
Speaker 1: finally making money. But then, you know, it wasn't the
Speaker 1: hype that it was. Now I think Back You boys
Speaker 1: are kind of at the peak they've ever been right now,
Speaker 1: totally dude. Yeah, and they own their stuff, they're planning
Speaker 1: their tours. I mean, they are making some time, but
Speaker 1: I respect you not caring that much. You know the
Speaker 1: money they're making. And you're like me with the guy
Speaker 1: who said to me, let's build this and let's do that,
Speaker 1: and you're going tour, you do the weekend with Bethany,
Speaker 1: I'm like, no, I'm exhausted listening. So you're never going
Speaker 1: to get the time back with your twins. It's in fact,
Speaker 1: you won't get back. Its true. So that's why you're
Speaker 1: saying it this way. You have you have a beautiful home,
Speaker 1: you have a beautiful relationship. And the blue vase behind you,
Speaker 1: I believe is a Baker raw vase because I have
Speaker 1: it in clear. And this is a crazy story, and
Speaker 1: then I'll let you go. I had fourteen foot ceilings
Speaker 1: in my old department and that vase was on a
Speaker 1: top shelf, just decorative, like it's on your table. And
Speaker 1: I heard a stud in the other room, like an earthquake,
Speaker 1: and I went in the other bedroom in Soho and
Speaker 1: that vase was on the floor with a giant dent
Speaker 1: and those ridges in the floor, and the vase did
Speaker 1: not break. Oh yeah, that thinks surdy. I have a
Speaker 1: big purple one too over there. But how crazy is that? Yeah?
Speaker 1: So anyway, that's what you used exactly. Um, well, now
Speaker 1: I do know you better, Lance, So did you ever?
Speaker 1: Are you still friends of Lisa Vanderpump she's our my kids? Stop?
Speaker 1: Oh you're really good friends with her? Oh yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1: We live real close to each other. Her daughter Pandora
Speaker 1: had a kid just at the same time we did,
Speaker 1: so we have weekly play dates and we have music together.
Speaker 1: So yeah, so we're very very in our in each
Speaker 1: other's lives and it wasn't really, because I always thought
Speaker 1: it was because you were a big Housewives fan, but
Speaker 1: not you don't even it's not because of that, No,
Speaker 1: I mean I knew Lisa before she was on the house.
Speaker 1: I'm the one who told Andy, look, remember this name,
Speaker 1: Lisa vanderp you need to put her own freaking bed,
Speaker 1: like because they were just putting Beverly Hills together. I'm like,
Speaker 1: you're going to remember this name. I didn't know that,
Speaker 1: Oh I did. I thought you were a fan and
Speaker 1: that's why. Oh, that's amazing, because a Housewife fan, like,
Speaker 1: let's started dating him. I watch every every iteration of
Speaker 1: house Okay, well one day we'll do rewives and we'll
Speaker 1: do an episode that Lisa was in, because yeah, and
Speaker 1: he could be. He could be. He can chime in. Um, Lance,
Speaker 1: You're amazing. It's so nice to talk to you, and
Speaker 1: I'm really am excited to have heard about your life
Speaker 1: like now to know you better. Yeah, definitely. Well, it's
Speaker 1: always good to see Bethany, you too. We'll kiss the babies.
Speaker 1: Tell us I said hello, and have a wonderful day.
Speaker 1: That was Lance Bass And the show never ceases to
Speaker 1: amaze me. And to be honest, just be on like rewives,
Speaker 1: there's different types of research. With rewives, you watch an
Speaker 1: episode and then break it down with someone and it's
Speaker 1: really usually about the two of you versus the episode.
Speaker 1: With just B, you're I'm doing homework too, and I
Speaker 1: don't do homework in my life. So with just B,
Speaker 1: I print out information about the people and learn about them.
Speaker 1: And you know, I thought Lance Bass was friends with
Speaker 1: Lisa vander Brump because of the House, so I was
Speaker 1: nothing of the sort. I thought he was like a
Speaker 1: super fan of House, So I was that type of
Speaker 1: campy thing. Nothing of the sort. He's so calm, he's
Speaker 1: so not extra, you know, he is a character of himself.
Speaker 1: And that's why I love the show because it just
Speaker 1: I get to really get a sense of people. And
Speaker 1: I say it a Paul in my fiance when we're
Speaker 1: at dinner, I'm like, I actually know Lance Bass now
Speaker 1: from the show. I know Cheryl Hines now, and it
Speaker 1: makes me happy because I feel like I become friends
Speaker 1: with them because we're talking for so long. Even though
Speaker 1: I've known Kelly Ripper for a year, is talking her
Speaker 1: on the show. I got to know her way better
Speaker 1: from just listening to her life and knowing what her
Speaker 1: mom was like and things like that. So I love this,
Speaker 1: so thank you so much. Remember to rate, review and subscribe,
Speaker 1: and I appreciate you listening, and have an amazing day.