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Speaker 1: Hey, Chip, I just sounded like my sister.

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Speaker 2: That's how she says it when I call her.

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Speaker 1: Lit up Chip, it's about to sing you a song.

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Speaker 1: So I did a podcast on Wednesday that the intuitive

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Speaker 1: told me that she kept picturing me behind a microphone

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Speaker 1: like emotionally belting out a song, and she's like, I

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Speaker 1: have now done this reading with you. Now I'm doing

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Speaker 1: this podcast with you, and that is not leaving me.

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Speaker 1: And I thought I said I'm not a singer though

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Speaker 1: in fact, on my Friday episodes with my co host,

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Speaker 1: we try to sing sometimes and we're terrible.

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Speaker 2: You don't. I want to know something funny is I

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Speaker 2: was Actually I was in the studio yesterday with the

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Speaker 2: band Lula and ended up in the vocal booth doing

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Speaker 2: gang vocals on the chorus.

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Speaker 1: What's a gang vocal similar to a gang bang?

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Speaker 2: No? Well yeah, but everyone's singing, so it's like we

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Speaker 2: were the choir basically, So everyone that was happened to

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Speaker 2: be at the studio that at that time studio and

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Speaker 2: we sang harmonies.

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Speaker 1: Was she channeling your energy on me? Maybe do I

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Speaker 1: need to do a gang vocal?

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Speaker 2: Maybe we need to add you?

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Speaker 1: I I was dying laughing every time she says it.

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Speaker 1: I'm like, I mean, I definitely think that I'm in

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Speaker 1: a phase of learning how to express so I could

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Speaker 1: see that. But like actually singing by myself behind a mic,

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Speaker 1: I mean sorry to the audience, and it may karaoke, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: but you know, I don't even really like to do

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Speaker 1: that anymore.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but that doesn't mean you won't, I guess not. Shoot,

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Speaker 2: So anyway, I'm always down for karaoke.

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Speaker 1: I'm just going to be singing for a week. My

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Speaker 1: homework is to sing a song by myself for five minutes,

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Speaker 1: just to like see what happens and see if it

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Speaker 1: opens anything up. So there you go.

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Speaker 2: She gave you homework. Yes, oh wow.

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Speaker 1: I love intuitives that give homework because it's been it's

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Speaker 1: like actually putting things, making things applicable in your life,

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Speaker 1: like actually putting them into practice.

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Speaker 2: Next week on the Velvet Edge, we're going to hear

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Speaker 2: the Day Be a single from Kelly.

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Speaker 1: Do you know what I do? You know what? Song?

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Speaker 1: I did today? After that podcast, I was prepping for

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Speaker 1: some other stuff and then I was sitting in front

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Speaker 1: of my computer and I did Lisa Lobe stay.

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Speaker 2: Oh, I just added that to my karaoke list.

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Speaker 1: For some reason, that has always been the one song

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Speaker 1: when I was younger, I was like, maybe I kind

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Speaker 1: of sound like Lisa Lobe, Like I thought maybe I could.

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Speaker 1: I think it's because I can stay on pitch with

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Speaker 1: her the whole entire time, Like I can hit all

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Speaker 1: the notes. Yeah, in my head, I sound just like her.

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Speaker 2: It gets to be a bit tongue twistery at the end.

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Speaker 1: I know every word. Yeah, I know the part you're

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Speaker 1: talking about though, Yeah, call me because you want me

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Speaker 1: and went to you let me go. Yeah, you try

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Speaker 1: to give away keep her.

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Speaker 2: I got a fun little fact about that song. It's

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Speaker 2: the only independent Well it might that this might not

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Speaker 2: be a fact anymore because it's an older song, but

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Speaker 2: when it hit number one on the pop chart, it

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Speaker 2: was the first time an independent song was number one

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Speaker 2: on the pop chart because she wasn't signed to a

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Speaker 2: record label. Oh really, Yeah, that song was on the

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Speaker 2: Reality Bite soundtrack.

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Speaker 1: Yes, that was how I got.

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Speaker 2: It was put out through a major label, but she

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Speaker 2: wasn't signed yet. She was Ethan Hawk's neighbor, no way, Yeah,

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Speaker 2: she was his neighbor and he put her on the soundtrack.

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Speaker 1: My god, I used to love her.

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Speaker 2: Mm hmmm, I have that. I have her first album

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Speaker 2: on cassette. It's called the Purple Tape.

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Speaker 1: That's what her cassette is called.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, because it was purple.

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Speaker 1: Oh oh my god, look at all these fun facts.

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Speaker 1: I didn't even know what I was opening Pandora's box

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Speaker 1: when I said, Lisa Lowe, maybe I'll sing it again

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Speaker 1: later and I'll always know it to you, my practice.

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Speaker 1: That's not what we're actually here to talk about. We

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Speaker 1: actually both just did a really interesting experiment. So if

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Speaker 1: you are not driving, I would is it employ you?

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Speaker 1: Is that how you say this?

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Speaker 2: Plore?

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Speaker 1: Implore? Wow, I knew that wasn't right, but my brain's

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Speaker 1: a little dead today. I would implore you to take

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Speaker 1: out your phone, open up. If you have an iPhone,

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Speaker 1: go to your settings. Then what do I do, Chip,

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Speaker 1: and I'm already forgot you.

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Speaker 2: Go to settings and look at screen screen time. Let

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Speaker 2: me see if I can find out for those Android

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Speaker 2: users Android.

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Speaker 1: So Chip texted me and says, have you ever looked

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Speaker 1: at your screen time? Which of course I have, But

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Speaker 1: now I choose to live in denial and not. But

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Speaker 1: I'm kind of glad you brought this back up to me,

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Speaker 1: because I do feel like when I just let it

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Speaker 1: free flow and I'm not at all paying attention, it

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Speaker 1: gets a little out of hand. Did you want to

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Speaker 1: like tell us some of your numbers? Chip?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? So I was shocked. So my daily average is

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Speaker 2: down this week, down twenty one percent from last week

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Speaker 2: to almost eight hours of use on my phone seven

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Speaker 2: hours and fifty one minutes.

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Speaker 1: That's your daily average.

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Speaker 2: That's the average daily. Yes, for yesterday, I was on

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Speaker 2: my phone ten hours and fifty three minutes. Yea calling

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Speaker 2: to me?

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Speaker 1: Does that include phone calls?

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Speaker 2: Probably? But I don't talk on the phone that much.

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Speaker 1: My daily average is seven hours and thirty two minutes.

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Speaker 1: That's on apps and websites. That's your highest category.

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Speaker 2: My most used category is I message? So texting?

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Speaker 1: Are you sure? Did you press the most?

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Speaker 2: It's just it's so it's social.

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Speaker 1: Mine's social as well. Does that including messages?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, gossages messages fall into that. So oh, I spent

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Speaker 2: a whopping eleven seconds today on LinkedIn?

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Speaker 1: Okay screen time for social? What is yours for last week?

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Speaker 2: Last week?

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Speaker 1: Mine is shocking? I want to I don't even know

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Speaker 1: if I want to say it.

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Speaker 2: Oh, my god, mine is I don't know if this

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Speaker 2: is collective. I don't know how to read it properly.

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Speaker 2: I'm looking at last week and it says eighteen hours

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Speaker 2: and sixteen minutes.

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Speaker 1: But yeah, mine says seventeen hours and sixteen minutes.

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Speaker 2: Crazy, that must be total though, right of the week.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, my daily average is four hours and nineteen minutes.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, my daily average is four hours and thirty

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Speaker 2: four seconds.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god. So Chip and I got to talking

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Speaker 1: about this because we were just, i mean, we comments

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Speaker 1: about this all the time. I'm on this podcast of

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Speaker 1: just how we kind of feel like we float through

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Speaker 1: this world or we're not fully paying attention to things.

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Speaker 1: We're just like driving the bus, I've going to work,

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Speaker 1: the hustle, all the things. And you actually sent me

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Speaker 1: a really interesting article. There was a couple, but this

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Speaker 1: one post from mel Robbins. If you guys ever follow her,

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Speaker 1: she's on Instagram. She said, on average, you will spend

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Speaker 1: twenty years of your life just scrolling through your phone.

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Speaker 1: Imagine it's the end of your life and someone says,

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Speaker 1: would you like an extra twenty years and your answer

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Speaker 1: is nah, I'd rather have spent twenty years scrolling mindlessly

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Speaker 1: on my phone.

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Speaker 2: It really puts it in perspective big time. I know

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Speaker 2: I use my phone a lot for work, and I

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Speaker 2: think so the text messaging has a lot to do

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Speaker 2: with work. But it's shocking to me the differentiation between

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Speaker 2: how much time I spend on email on my phone

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Speaker 2: versus text messaging and you know a lot of work

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Speaker 2: stuff now.

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Speaker 1: Does well, we talked about that.

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Speaker 2: I hate it. I hate texting for work, but you

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Speaker 2: just have to just is what. It is, just the

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Speaker 2: world that we live in now. But it's it's a

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Speaker 2: huge difference between mail and texting. I would imagine that

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Speaker 2: I just do more of the emailing on my computer,

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Speaker 2: but I also I am running around a lot. I'm not

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Speaker 2: often just sitting at my desk in front.

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Speaker 1: That's what I think. I was shocked by your numbers

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Speaker 1: because I feel like you're either driving or running around

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Speaker 1: pretty consistently.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but I'm one of those bad people that is

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Speaker 2: on my phone a lot when I'm driving.

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Speaker 1: I'm not a bad person. Don't talk about my friend

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Speaker 1: the way.

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Speaker 2: Well, I'm just like, it's not a smart thing to do,

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Speaker 2: and I recognize that, but I also do it, you know,

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Speaker 2: so I need to be better about that.

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Speaker 1: Wud you just say when you're driving, when I'm driving, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's to be better about that.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I have to be better about it.

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Speaker 1: I just think that it's so fascinating because I had

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Speaker 1: a somatic therapist once tell me that motion that I'm

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Speaker 1: doing the motion right now. You guys have like the scroll,

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Speaker 1: Like the way we move our finger up and down

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Speaker 1: on the phone when we're scrolling is a way that

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Speaker 1: we calm our nervous system. Really, it's yes, it's a

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Speaker 1: way we do associate. And so the social media people

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Speaker 1: specifically are so brilliant because they have learned how to

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Speaker 1: tap into our addictive brain in our nervous systems. And

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Speaker 1: so we're sitting there doing that scrolling motion after the

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Speaker 1: like at the end of a long day, or if

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Speaker 1: you find yourself doing it in between task or when

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Speaker 1: you're on the phone with someone and you like need

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Speaker 1: to go do that, Really your nervous system is like,

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Speaker 1: I'm overloaded, is what that's saying. Before, No, we've never.

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Speaker 2: Done so it's something that we've adapted to.

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Speaker 1: Well, it's what you do on your phone. So before

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Speaker 1: like when you only had MySpace on your computer, it

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Speaker 1: was different, right, but somehow like that's how it's progressed

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Speaker 1: in our society now that we have such access to

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Speaker 1: apps on our phone, and that could be for dating apps,

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Speaker 1: that could be anything. It's like we always wonder why

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Speaker 1: these things are so addictive. There's obviously like the validation piece,

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Speaker 1: you know, the reward process that speaks to our brains

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Speaker 1: and our nervous systems. But I just thought that that's

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Speaker 1: so interesting about that motion, and so I have started

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Speaker 1: to try, like if I find myself having those days

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Speaker 1: where I'm just not able to not pick up my phone,

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Speaker 1: I'm like, what is going on? Like trying to ask

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Speaker 1: yourself the deeper questions. But it's crazy how unconscious it is,

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Speaker 1: you know, like it's literally like that phantom even vibrate

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Speaker 1: thing that happens in the back pocket, or if you

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Speaker 1: if you see someone else pick up their phone and

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Speaker 1: they're checking it, like you have to check yours. All

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Speaker 1: of a sudden, you notice.

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Speaker 2: It's almost like an adult pacifier if you think about it,

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Speaker 2: because you know, when I walk in, if I'm like

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Speaker 2: early to a bar or a restaurant or something, it's

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Speaker 2: like my shield. Yeah, I can like look like I'm

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Speaker 2: not alone. I can disappear into something and yeah, I

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Speaker 2: tell myself, Oh, I can use this time to get

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Speaker 2: some stuff done. But if I look at the stats

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Speaker 2: on my right, for the most part, I'm probably not

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Speaker 2: doing shit that's worth doing, you know, So I have

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Speaker 2: to change something like this is shocking to me. This

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Speaker 2: is the first time I've ever looked at I have

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Speaker 2: to google how to figure it out. And by the way,

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Speaker 2: if you're an Android user, what you would do is

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Speaker 2: you open your device's settings app and then tap Digital

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Speaker 2: well Being and Parental Controls, and there's charts that show

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Speaker 2: your device use and then you should throw away your phone.

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Speaker 1: Again on my phone, don't start them on those green pets.

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Speaker 1: I can't. I can't hear that rant again. I will

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Speaker 1: say there is something you can do on iPhones. And

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Speaker 1: I did have this set up for me for a

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Speaker 1: while where it was like, after an hour on your

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Speaker 1: social media, you would get it stops you. It like

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Speaker 1: takes you out of it, and it goes alert You've

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Speaker 1: been on here for an hour. Let me tell you

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Speaker 1: how fast that comes in your day. There would be

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Speaker 1: times where I'm like, it's eight am, how am I

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Speaker 1: already getting that? Like right, and so anyway, I wouldn't

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Speaker 1: necessarily follow the rules, but it was something that I

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Speaker 1: had in place that did help me actually be conscious

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Speaker 1: of it more. I mean, does it not lock you

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Speaker 1: out of the app until the next day, No, you

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Speaker 1: can just close it out.

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Speaker 2: See, there must be some way, like because off with

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Speaker 2: the parental control, I have to go a little deeper,

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Speaker 2: because there are parental controls that you can literally lock

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Speaker 2: them out.

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Speaker 1: I mean, you sound like such an addict right now,

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Speaker 1: though you hear yourself.

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Speaker 2: I mean no, truthfully, I would need something that extreme

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Speaker 2: because I would do exactly what you did. Ah fuck it,

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Speaker 2: like in the same way that like when my alarm

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Speaker 2: goes off at six am, I hit snooze for an hour.

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Speaker 1: We'll tell about that stat So I was.

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Speaker 2: Like, wait a minute, why have I used my clock

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Speaker 2: more than I used email that day? Well, because I like,

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Speaker 2: I hit snooze for an hour, and so you're in

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Speaker 2: your clock is open the whole time that so it's

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Speaker 2: from like six am to seven am. The other day.

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Speaker 1: I just can't The snooze thing is so bizarre to me.

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Speaker 1: I don't understand it because I'm like, just set your

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Speaker 1: alarm for seven then why.

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Speaker 2: Then I would hit snooze till eight.

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Speaker 1: But it's just such disrupted sleep, I guess, so I

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Speaker 1: don't feel rested after. It makes me feel worse if I'm.

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Speaker 2: Trying to shift my daily habits so that I wake

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Speaker 2: up earlier, so that I can get like a dog

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Speaker 2: walk in, some meditations, some journaling, and the gym all

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Speaker 2: before work. But it's it's really I know, it's really

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Speaker 2: hard to shift that because I'm used to staying up

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Speaker 2: really late, and waking up at six is really hard.

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Speaker 2: So I have started now. I put my phone in

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Speaker 2: the kitchen and an alarm clock in the kitchen, so

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Speaker 2: I have to get out of bed to turn them off.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and then once you're out, it's like you're up.

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Speaker 1: Seem as well make a coffee while you're yeah.

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Speaker 2: Right, and then once I want and you know, after

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Speaker 2: a few days of this, it will start to form

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Speaker 2: a habit where it's a lot easier just to get

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Speaker 2: up at that time. Because I actually really love being

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Speaker 2: up in the morning. I also happen to love sleeping,

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Speaker 2: so if I can sleep later, I do. But this

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Speaker 2: was a short tail sign, Like that's really embarrassing, it's

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Speaker 2: shocking you were on your clock for an hour. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: so like what a lame app to be on.

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Speaker 1: The clock, Like what you did? Send me another post

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Speaker 1: that I thought was really interesting because it really breaks

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Speaker 1: down because when we were talking about me backtrack for

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Speaker 1: a second, when we were talking about the phone thing,

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Speaker 1: you were like, oh my god, this is crazy. Think

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Speaker 1: about all the time we're missing with the people in

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Speaker 1: our lives, like actually interacting with real human beings, really

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Speaker 1: truly connecting, not just disassociating or thinking that being on

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Speaker 1: social media is true connection. Like we're missing relationships with

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Speaker 1: the people in our lives. And then you found this post.

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Speaker 1: Do you want to read it or do you want

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Speaker 1: me to?

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Speaker 2: You can start because there's several slides.

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Speaker 1: So yeah, this is on tanks good news. But basically

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Speaker 1: they're talking about how from the time we're born until

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Speaker 1: our death, there's different seasons that different relationships are like priorities.

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Speaker 1: So when you first start, obviously, like your relationship with

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Speaker 1: your parents and your siblings, like your immediate family is high,

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Speaker 1: but it peaks in childhood and then it declines after

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Speaker 1: the age of twenty. So the key takeaways they say

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Speaker 1: with this slide is time with family is limited. Time

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Speaker 1: with your parents declines sharply after age twenty. You may

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Speaker 1: only see your loved ones a few more times. Prioritize

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Speaker 1: and cherish every moment.

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Speaker 2: I mean, it's wild you talk.

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Speaker 1: About that one a lot because you don't. I was

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Speaker 1: talking about recently, like my parents are actually moving to Nashville,

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Speaker 1: and I'm so grateful because even if I see them

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Speaker 1: once a week, it's more than I'm like, we're seeing

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Speaker 1: them now twice a year, three times a year, you know,

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Speaker 1: like not very often on holidays. And then it's like,

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Speaker 1: as everyone gets older, you start to really take that

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Speaker 1: into consideration of like, oh my gosh, there's not that

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Speaker 1: much times. If I keep on this routine of how

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Speaker 1: often I'm seeing them, there's not many times that I'm

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Speaker 1: to see them.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, the older we all get, the worst it gets.

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Speaker 2: And you know, you and I it's a little different

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Speaker 2: because we're both single without children, right Like I think

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Speaker 2: about with my sister, who actually lives a lot closer

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Speaker 2: to my parents and because of that gets to see

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Speaker 2: them more often. But the older her kids are getting,

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Speaker 2: the more complicated it is for her to carve time

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Speaker 2: out to go see my parents.

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Speaker 1: Of course, because she's got softball games, running them around.

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Speaker 2: And running them around doctor's appointments, someone sick and she

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Speaker 2: doesn't want to get my parents sick, and all of

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Speaker 2: the things. And there's you know, there's a million reasons.

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Speaker 2: Right seeing this post and seeing the graph is actually,

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Speaker 2: like it's kind of heartbreaking when you think about it,

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Speaker 2: Like especially for people that move away. Like I haven't

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Speaker 2: lived where I grew up since I was eighteen years old, right,

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Speaker 2: so the amount of time that I've gotten to spend

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Speaker 2: with my parents is diminished because of that. So I,

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Speaker 2: you know, I do make a very concerted effort to

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Speaker 2: try and get home several times a year. And if

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Speaker 2: there's a work excuse for me to be close to

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Speaker 2: the like closer to the home, I'll try and build

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Speaker 2: in a trip home, even if it's for one night,

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Speaker 2: because I know how much it means to them, and

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Speaker 2: when they're gone, it'll mean even more to me. You

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Speaker 2: know that I put in that effort.

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Speaker 1: For sure, And you embrace the time you have with them.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: This one says time spent with friends peaks at eighteen

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Speaker 1: and declines sharply to a low baseline. Key takeaways embrace friendship,

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Speaker 1: but focus on depths, Cherish those who are with you

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Speaker 1: through good and bad times. Invest your energy in healthy,

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Speaker 1: meaningful friendships that last.

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Speaker 2: That one makes a lot of sense when I look

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Speaker 2: at it, But as someone who's single and doesn't live

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Speaker 2: in the same town as my parents, my family are

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Speaker 2: my friend friends, well, I actually.

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Speaker 1: Think our friend group is really good at seeing each other, right,

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Speaker 1: And so.

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Speaker 2: I don't know that that graph necessarily applies to me,

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Speaker 2: but I can see how in general it applies to

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Speaker 2: most people because you know, your life is pretty care

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Speaker 2: free until you're eighteen, and then you go off to

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Speaker 2: college and responsibilities set in and you're starting families of

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Speaker 2: your own and all those things, so time with friends

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Speaker 2: becomes less of a priority. But for me, if I'm

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Speaker 2: not with friends, I'm alone.

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Speaker 1: Well, right, me too, So my graph.

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Speaker 2: Is a little different. Like granted, like i'd have to

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Speaker 2: quantify which friends because it would have to be very

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Speaker 2: different graphs. Like obviously my high school friends, that graph

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Speaker 2: really does apply to me, yeah, because I very right

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Speaker 2: to speak to them. And then I have New York

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Speaker 2: friends and LA friends and Nashville friends, and so I

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Speaker 2: have I guess I have different graphs, But I think

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Speaker 2: that the key takeaway for me, there is is like

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Speaker 2: to identify those that you just can't live without and

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Speaker 2: make sure to spend as much time with or communicate

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Speaker 2: with them as much as possible.

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Speaker 1: Well, I like the depth, not Brett like it. I

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Speaker 1: do think as you get older, or for me, this

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Speaker 1: is how it's worked. I've started to not have as

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Speaker 1: many acquaintances per se, like in your twenties and stuff.

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Speaker 1: Remember I'd be like, oh, I just want to go out,

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Speaker 1: so who can I do that with? And it's like

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Speaker 1: you go up with the person who didn't barely even knew,

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Speaker 1: Like it was just I don't know. We would just

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Speaker 1: hang out with different kinds of people. Now, I'm like,

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Speaker 1: if I'm giving effort into a relationship or time because

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Speaker 1: none of us have that much of that because of

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Speaker 1: work and responsibilities and all the things you mentioned. I

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Speaker 1: do think I need it to be someone who I

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Speaker 1: genuinely have a connection with, who is pouring into me

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Speaker 1: as much as I'm pouring into them, that we can

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Speaker 1: actually talk about real shit. We're not just like going

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Speaker 1: and getting drunk together like you win in your twenties,

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Speaker 1: you know, like your relationships do change. But I do

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Speaker 1: think the depth piece is something to really consider as

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Speaker 1: you get older. Yeah, times it with partners the opposite,

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Speaker 1: But that actually goes to show if you're not happy

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Speaker 1: in your marriage or your relationship, like you're wasting a

401
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Speaker 1: lot of time because that trends upwards until death. So

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Speaker 1: the key takeaways there, he says, are, who you choose

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Speaker 1: as your partner is actually the most important decision you'll

404
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Speaker 1: ever make. Find someone you genuinely enjoy spending time with.

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Speaker 1: Never settle for less than love.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's I mean, the end of that graph is

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Speaker 2: really sad too, because it's a steep drop off, which

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Speaker 2: means that's sized death.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, well that's the inevitable that try is not happening,

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Speaker 1: but we all will die.

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Speaker 2: It's also interesting too, sort of. I mean, I don't

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Speaker 2: know how where they got the graphs from, but the

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Speaker 2: really sharp endclines is between like twenty four and thirty.

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Speaker 2: I wonder if that's like that that's the window when

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Speaker 2: most people get married.

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Speaker 1: Probably, yeah, right, because it rises a lot. Well, yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's probably like look like that. That's okay though, everyone's

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Speaker 1: on their own journey. I've spent with children. Peaks in

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Speaker 1: your thirties, so that's I guess. When people are having kids,

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Speaker 1: more decline sharply thereafter, time with your children is short. Same,

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Speaker 1: it's the opposite of the parents obviously, slow down and

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Speaker 1: embrace the sweetness that children bring to your life. Co workers,

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Speaker 1: this is an interesting one. Steady during the prime working

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Speaker 1: years from twenty to sixty, But you spent a lot

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Speaker 1: of time with your coworkers.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Yes, it's the longest relationships that you have. Really crazy,

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Speaker 2: Who the most steady, I guess.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. Who you choose to work with is one of

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Speaker 1: the most important decisions you'll make as well. Find work

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Speaker 1: and co workers that create energy in your life. We

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Speaker 1: have an interesting thing there too, though, because literally we

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Speaker 1: work with our best friends.

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Speaker 2: True.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, And that's how my friends have become my friends

435
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Speaker 1: is from work. Yeah.

436
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Speaker 2: And depending on where you live, you might not have

437
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Speaker 2: as many options of you know, what you get to

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Speaker 2: do or or who you get to work with.

439
00:20:02,040 --> 00:20:02,440
Speaker 1: True.

440
00:20:02,880 --> 00:20:07,320
Speaker 2: So we're a bit of an anomaly there. But that said,

441
00:20:07,480 --> 00:20:11,159
Speaker 2: I think if you are able to choose to do

442
00:20:11,200 --> 00:20:13,600
Speaker 2: something that you love, you're probably going to end up

443
00:20:13,600 --> 00:20:15,480
Speaker 2: finding like minded people that you're going to get along

444
00:20:15,480 --> 00:20:16,080
Speaker 2: with really well.

445
00:20:20,480 --> 00:20:23,119
Speaker 1: Times Been alone was a little weird too. It says

446
00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:27,040
Speaker 1: it steadily increases throughout your life, which if you really

447
00:20:27,040 --> 00:20:29,840
Speaker 1: think about, is true. And my mom has always said this,

448
00:20:30,040 --> 00:20:32,920
Speaker 1: Like the older you get, the more clear it becomes.

449
00:20:33,040 --> 00:20:35,800
Speaker 1: You remember, you came into this world alone, and you're

450
00:20:35,800 --> 00:20:38,400
Speaker 1: going to actually leave alone too, even if you're surrounded

451
00:20:38,400 --> 00:20:40,480
Speaker 1: by loved ones. Like it's an experience that we all

452
00:20:40,520 --> 00:20:44,000
Speaker 1: go through by ourselves. Right, So he says, learn to

453
00:20:44,040 --> 00:20:49,400
Speaker 1: embrace solitude, lecture, boredom, muscle, regularly, find happiness and joy

454
00:20:49,480 --> 00:20:51,320
Speaker 1: in the time you have to yourself. There will be

455
00:20:51,359 --> 00:20:54,600
Speaker 1: a whole lot of it as you get older. So

456
00:20:54,840 --> 00:20:58,800
Speaker 1: in summary, one, family time is limited, chairshit. Two friend

457
00:20:58,800 --> 00:21:03,360
Speaker 1: time is limited, piz real ones. Three partner time is significant,

458
00:21:03,480 --> 00:21:07,440
Speaker 1: never settle for children's time is precious, be present. Five

459
00:21:07,560 --> 00:21:12,200
Speaker 1: coworker time is significant. Find energy. Six alone time is highest.

460
00:21:12,480 --> 00:21:15,879
Speaker 1: Love yourself, damn, And don't get off your phone.

461
00:21:16,240 --> 00:21:17,480
Speaker 2: Get off your phones.

462
00:21:18,320 --> 00:21:20,560
Speaker 1: I mean, those are two a little bit separate topics

463
00:21:20,560 --> 00:21:22,800
Speaker 1: that at the point we're trying to make here is

464
00:21:22,840 --> 00:21:26,040
Speaker 1: like it really is starting to dawn on us how

465
00:21:26,160 --> 00:21:29,200
Speaker 1: unconscious we're moving through our lives sometimes and how much

466
00:21:29,200 --> 00:21:32,360
Speaker 1: time we're wasting on things that actually don't matter to us.

467
00:21:32,520 --> 00:21:35,440
Speaker 2: Well, you know, when you think about like the lifetime

468
00:21:35,440 --> 00:21:39,760
Speaker 2: of humanity and how new these phones being in our

469
00:21:39,800 --> 00:21:43,959
Speaker 2: hands and having everything touch of a button is, you know,

470
00:21:44,040 --> 00:21:46,400
Speaker 2: on that graph, it's such a small amount of time,

471
00:21:46,480 --> 00:21:49,720
Speaker 2: So we really don't know the shift that this is

472
00:21:49,760 --> 00:21:52,800
Speaker 2: going to have in humanity. And you know, it feels

473
00:21:52,880 --> 00:21:56,480
Speaker 2: like we're really connected because we're on Instagram and Facebook

474
00:21:56,520 --> 00:21:59,080
Speaker 2: and all the things that you know are meant or

475
00:21:59,160 --> 00:22:03,080
Speaker 2: designed to act us, but we're really isolating ourselves. I

476
00:22:03,080 --> 00:22:05,480
Speaker 2: do think there are lots of benefits to it too,

477
00:22:05,600 --> 00:22:07,399
Speaker 2: Like I can stay in touch with friends that live

478
00:22:07,440 --> 00:22:09,960
Speaker 2: in Europe of course because of this device, and it

479
00:22:10,000 --> 00:22:11,919
Speaker 2: makes it a lot easier than mailing a letter and

480
00:22:11,960 --> 00:22:15,080
Speaker 2: hoping it gets there one day. But I think that

481
00:22:15,200 --> 00:22:18,520
Speaker 2: the major takeaway is that it's it's a net loss.

482
00:22:19,040 --> 00:22:21,480
Speaker 2: These things, you know, they might make us a little

483
00:22:21,480 --> 00:22:23,240
Speaker 2: bit more productive, but I think they make us more

484
00:22:23,280 --> 00:22:24,720
Speaker 2: isolated than connected.

485
00:22:25,280 --> 00:22:26,880
Speaker 1: Because I was thinking, you said, so much of your

486
00:22:26,880 --> 00:22:29,240
Speaker 1: time is spent texting, and like, even with work stuff,

487
00:22:29,480 --> 00:22:33,119
Speaker 1: how often are you actually in a bad mood but

488
00:22:33,160 --> 00:22:36,920
Speaker 1: you're texting like you're not you know, you're not actually

489
00:22:37,040 --> 00:22:40,399
Speaker 1: being true. It's like when you're experience a person in

490
00:22:40,440 --> 00:22:42,640
Speaker 1: real life or even on the phone. You can hear

491
00:22:42,720 --> 00:22:44,800
Speaker 1: tone of voice, you can hear like you just read

492
00:22:45,040 --> 00:22:49,720
Speaker 1: energy better than you can do to like just a

493
00:22:49,800 --> 00:22:53,280
Speaker 1: text right totally, So.

494
00:22:53,640 --> 00:22:56,359
Speaker 2: You can push and you can push down your emotions

495
00:22:56,400 --> 00:22:58,720
Speaker 2: too when you actually probably need to sit in them

496
00:22:58,760 --> 00:23:01,680
Speaker 2: for a minute and feel them and work through them

497
00:23:02,160 --> 00:23:03,960
Speaker 2: and work through whatever it is it's putting you in

498
00:23:04,000 --> 00:23:06,800
Speaker 2: that mood. But you have to like be on and

499
00:23:06,840 --> 00:23:09,919
Speaker 2: getting your job done and all the things, or planning

500
00:23:09,960 --> 00:23:11,879
Speaker 2: your night out or whatever it is that you're doing.

501
00:23:12,359 --> 00:23:14,680
Speaker 2: But you know, to lean into my word of the

502
00:23:14,760 --> 00:23:17,280
Speaker 2: year which was explore, like I am. I need to

503
00:23:17,320 --> 00:23:19,640
Speaker 2: sit down and do some deep digging and figure out

504
00:23:19,680 --> 00:23:22,879
Speaker 2: what I'm gonna do to buy myself some more time

505
00:23:23,000 --> 00:23:27,880
Speaker 2: for me because these dating apps I like every time

506
00:23:27,920 --> 00:23:32,119
Speaker 2: I'm on them, like it's there. I don't find them beneficial, like,

507
00:23:32,200 --> 00:23:34,199
Speaker 2: but I feel like I'm doing something. I feel like

508
00:23:34,200 --> 00:23:37,200
Speaker 2: I'm searching for my somebody. But I would probably be

509
00:23:37,200 --> 00:23:42,160
Speaker 2: better off like volunteering somewhere or even out at a bar,

510
00:23:42,600 --> 00:23:44,440
Speaker 2: like forcing myself.

511
00:23:44,040 --> 00:23:46,120
Speaker 1: Through the discomfort activity, yeah.

512
00:23:46,000 --> 00:23:48,480
Speaker 2: Or doing an activity, joining a sports team with some

513
00:23:48,560 --> 00:23:54,320
Speaker 2: gay gaze, you know, like sports ball, just doing something

514
00:23:54,359 --> 00:23:57,600
Speaker 2: where I'm interacting with people in a real way versus

515
00:23:57,920 --> 00:24:00,000
Speaker 2: just putting myself in like a window to be shot.

516
00:24:00,600 --> 00:24:00,760
Speaker 1: You know.

517
00:24:00,920 --> 00:24:03,160
Speaker 2: That's yeah.

518
00:24:03,240 --> 00:24:05,119
Speaker 1: I used to when I was on apps. I would

519
00:24:05,280 --> 00:24:07,439
Speaker 1: set a limit, like I would set the timer for

520
00:24:07,520 --> 00:24:08,960
Speaker 1: ten minutes in the morning, and then I would do

521
00:24:08,960 --> 00:24:10,760
Speaker 1: ten minutes at night. That's all I would do, because

522
00:24:10,880 --> 00:24:12,680
Speaker 1: to me, it is the same thing as social media,

523
00:24:12,680 --> 00:24:13,919
Speaker 1: and I was like, I do not I do not

524
00:24:14,000 --> 00:24:16,560
Speaker 1: need another thing where I'm just scrolling and scrolling and scrolling.

525
00:24:16,720 --> 00:24:18,800
Speaker 1: I also found that the days where I wouldn't do

526
00:24:18,880 --> 00:24:21,360
Speaker 1: that and I would let myself scroll, I would get

527
00:24:21,440 --> 00:24:25,760
Speaker 1: so depressed because it would like, you, if you're continuing

528
00:24:25,760 --> 00:24:28,399
Speaker 1: to scroll, you're obviously not seeing anything you want, and

529
00:24:28,400 --> 00:24:31,840
Speaker 1: you're looking for some sort of proof that that someone

530
00:24:32,160 --> 00:24:34,920
Speaker 1: could be out there. So it's like depressing if you're

531
00:24:34,960 --> 00:24:35,760
Speaker 1: not finding it.

532
00:24:35,920 --> 00:24:38,840
Speaker 2: You know, yeah, I think it's a self fulfilling prophecy.

533
00:24:38,880 --> 00:24:43,840
Speaker 2: It's exactly most of the time you're not finding someone, right,

534
00:24:44,320 --> 00:24:47,360
Speaker 2: you know, like literally ninety percent of the time, it's

535
00:24:47,480 --> 00:24:50,240
Speaker 2: not really working for you. And then you're like, well, fuck,

536
00:24:50,280 --> 00:24:54,040
Speaker 2: I just wasted two hours, and sure, you know, at

537
00:24:54,119 --> 00:24:55,960
Speaker 2: least like if you're at a bar and you don't

538
00:24:56,040 --> 00:24:59,479
Speaker 2: meet somebody, you probably had fun. You might have had

539
00:24:59,480 --> 00:25:01,600
Speaker 2: some good common and had a couple of drinks or what.

540
00:25:01,720 --> 00:25:04,119
Speaker 2: I don't know. I need to change some shit up

541
00:25:04,160 --> 00:25:06,880
Speaker 2: in my life. Is all based on these statistics of

542
00:25:06,920 --> 00:25:07,359
Speaker 2: my phone.

543
00:25:07,640 --> 00:25:11,639
Speaker 1: So basically, we are just inviting you guys to go

544
00:25:11,720 --> 00:25:15,400
Speaker 1: check your screen time like we did, give the fascinating experience,

545
00:25:15,840 --> 00:25:18,040
Speaker 1: and let us know what you come across too, Like

546
00:25:18,080 --> 00:25:19,639
Speaker 1: I just want to. I think I am going to

547
00:25:19,680 --> 00:25:21,840
Speaker 1: set the timer again for my social media just so

548
00:25:21,880 --> 00:25:24,560
Speaker 1: it goes off because I am trying to be more

549
00:25:24,640 --> 00:25:28,040
Speaker 1: active on there for work purposes. But I also don't

550
00:25:28,040 --> 00:25:30,359
Speaker 1: need to fully scroll all the time, Like I'm just

551
00:25:30,400 --> 00:25:33,960
Speaker 1: finding myself doing it and it's basically a waste of time.

552
00:25:34,080 --> 00:25:38,159
Speaker 1: So yeah, yeah, that's my new thing. If you guys

553
00:25:38,240 --> 00:25:39,600
Speaker 1: do try it and you want to let us know,

554
00:25:39,640 --> 00:25:41,720
Speaker 1: you can always email us at the edge at velvesedge

555
00:25:41,720 --> 00:25:43,520
Speaker 1: dot com or you can hit us up on the

556
00:25:43,600 --> 00:25:47,880
Speaker 1: voicemail send us some voicemails. We're ready. You can find

557
00:25:47,880 --> 00:25:49,960
Speaker 1: that on my Instagram in the link at the bio.

558
00:25:50,280 --> 00:25:52,399
Speaker 1: It is at Velvet's Edge Chip.

559
00:25:52,920 --> 00:25:57,159
Speaker 2: I'm at Chip doorsh it's Chip d R sch.

560
00:25:57,040 --> 00:25:59,080
Speaker 1: And as you guys are going into the weekend and

561
00:25:59,200 --> 00:26:02,440
Speaker 1: you're living on the edge. I was gonna try to

562
00:26:02,480 --> 00:26:07,240
Speaker 1: be cute, but I stopped my phone. You're living, hopefully

563
00:26:07,320 --> 00:26:09,600
Speaker 1: not living on your phone. I hope you always remember

564
00:26:09,680 --> 00:26:13,200
Speaker 1: to a casual bye bye