WEBVTT - SYSK’s 2018 Super Spooktacular 0:00:03.800 --> 0:00:09.000 Hey, and welcome to the Spooky Halloween Podcast. I'm yeah 0:00:09.160 --> 0:00:13.319 very nice. I'm Joshua Lander and Clark. There's Bride of 0:00:13.400 --> 0:00:18.840 Chucky Bryant, and there's Jarifying Roland. Jerry said she has 0:00:18.880 --> 0:00:20.439 no time for us this year, so we have to 0:00:20.440 --> 0:00:22.479 make all our own sound effects with our own mouths. 0:00:22.760 --> 0:00:25.919 That sounds good, that's cool, we can do that. Watch this. 0:00:28.840 --> 0:00:33.600 That was terrifying. Yeah. All the spit, I think is 0:00:33.640 --> 0:00:38.159 what made it so terrifying. Um so, chuck, this is 0:00:38.200 --> 0:00:40.880 our annual Halloween episode. I don't know if anyone told 0:00:40.880 --> 0:00:44.599 you this yet. Are spook tacular? Yes, it's right. And 0:00:44.800 --> 0:00:46.760 uh for those of you who have just found the 0:00:46.800 --> 0:00:50.480 podcast recently and this is your first time, every Christmas 0:00:50.479 --> 0:00:54.080 and Halloween we present an ad free episode for your enjoyment. 0:00:54.560 --> 0:00:57.360 This has nothing to do with explaining anything. It's just 0:00:57.480 --> 0:01:00.800 some spooky stories that we like to read and then 0:01:00.920 --> 0:01:03.360 Jerry adds a little sound design. But apparently this year 0:01:03.360 --> 0:01:05.840 it's up to us. That's right, So do you want 0:01:05.880 --> 0:01:09.199 to do it? Let's do it? Okay, So I say 0:01:09.240 --> 0:01:13.160 that we start with my pick, the Algerin in Blackwood 0:01:13.880 --> 0:01:19.319 um story ancient lights, great dim the lights? Everybody get 0:01:20.920 --> 0:01:24.600 whatever you do to get into the spooky mood. Um. 0:01:24.600 --> 0:01:26.320 I don't know how you play it in your houses, 0:01:26.400 --> 0:01:30.440 but dim the lights you do. Maybe get a cat 0:01:31.280 --> 0:01:32.800 let it stare at you for a little while. It's 0:01:32.840 --> 0:01:37.520 pretty creepy. That's the sweetest thing ever, a cat staring 0:01:37.560 --> 0:01:46.679 at you. Sure. Maybe take the your witch's broom out 0:01:46.680 --> 0:01:49.880 of the closet. Oh yeah, then that'll set a mood. Um. 0:01:50.240 --> 0:01:53.800 Put up your cobwebs. Don't clean those out and put 0:01:53.800 --> 0:01:56.040 them up. Yeah, what are you doing cleaning them out? 0:01:56.080 --> 0:01:59.480 You need spiders to keep pesky bugs away, that's right, 0:02:00.080 --> 0:02:03.160 and then you keep lizards to eat the spiders. That's right. See, 0:02:03.160 --> 0:02:06.880 you did learn something today. I did. Okay, you're ready, 0:02:08.600 --> 0:02:16.520 allow me to start, please, Jerry, if you please, thank you, Jerry. 0:02:16.560 --> 0:02:21.520 Jerry's already asleep. This is ancient lights by Elgin and Blackwood. 0:02:25.760 --> 0:02:28.799 From South Water where he left the train. The road 0:02:28.919 --> 0:02:32.720 led due west that he knew for the rest he 0:02:32.840 --> 0:02:36.440 trusted to luck, being one of those born walkers who 0:02:36.480 --> 0:02:40.600 dislikes asking the way. He had that instinct, and as 0:02:40.600 --> 0:02:43.520 a rule it served him well. A mile or so 0:02:43.720 --> 0:02:46.320 due west along the Sandy Road till you come to 0:02:46.360 --> 0:02:49.720 a style on the right, then across the fields, you'll 0:02:49.720 --> 0:02:53.040 see the red house straight before you. He glanced at 0:02:53.040 --> 0:02:56.880 the postcard's instructions once again, and once again he tried 0:02:56.919 --> 0:03:01.720 to decipher the scratched out sentence, without success. It had 0:03:01.760 --> 0:03:06.000 been so elaborately inked over that no word was legible. 0:03:06.240 --> 0:03:10.240 Inked Out sentences in a letter were always enticing. He 0:03:10.280 --> 0:03:12.880 wondered what it was that had to be so very 0:03:12.919 --> 0:03:19.160 carefully obliterated. The afternoon was boisterous, with a tearing, shouting 0:03:19.200 --> 0:03:23.080 wind that blew from the sea across the Sussex wheeld 0:03:23.280 --> 0:03:27.040 have no idea what a wield This massive clouds with 0:03:27.240 --> 0:03:31.320 round had piled up edges cannoned across gaping spaces of 0:03:31.360 --> 0:03:35.280 blue sky far away. The line of downs swept the 0:03:35.320 --> 0:03:40.480 horizon like an arriving wave. Chuck, dumberry ring which I 0:03:40.480 --> 0:03:43.720 looked up. It's an old hill fort from years ago 0:03:43.800 --> 0:03:47.520 and a Celtic temple. Okay, bear that in mind. So 0:03:47.640 --> 0:03:52.200 this old hill fort, he's saying, rode the crest of 0:03:52.320 --> 0:03:57.960 the horizon like a wave. Okay, a scudding ship holed 0:03:57.960 --> 0:04:01.280 down before the wind. He took his hat off and 0:04:01.320 --> 0:04:05.960 walked rapidly, breathing great drafts of air with delight and exhilaration. 0:04:06.200 --> 0:04:09.160 This guy really liked walking. Man, he's the opposite of me. 0:04:10.680 --> 0:04:13.280 You would this would be chucking a segway this whole 0:04:13.280 --> 0:04:18.880 time right the road was deserted, no horseman, bicycles or motors, 0:04:18.920 --> 0:04:23.520 not even a tradesman's cart, no single walker. But anyhow, 0:04:23.760 --> 0:04:26.520 he would never have asked the way, keeping a sharp 0:04:26.560 --> 0:04:28.680 eye for the style. And by the way, chuck, his 0:04:28.760 --> 0:04:31.760 style is like a little thing that humans can use 0:04:31.839 --> 0:04:35.640 to get over, like a cattle fence, but like cattle 0:04:35.720 --> 0:04:38.000 can't get through, so like maybe steps on either side 0:04:38.000 --> 0:04:42.719 of a fence style. Okay, m hmm, stupid cows. I 0:04:42.800 --> 0:04:46.920 know I can't walk up steps. Keeping a sharp eye 0:04:46.920 --> 0:04:49.880 for the style, he pounded along while the wind tossed 0:04:49.880 --> 0:04:52.359 the cloak against his face and made waves across the 0:04:52.360 --> 0:04:55.640 blue puddles and the yellow road. The trees showed their 0:04:55.680 --> 0:04:58.839 under leaves of white, the bracken and the high new 0:04:58.920 --> 0:05:02.680 grass bent all one way. Great life was in the day, 0:05:03.000 --> 0:05:07.039 high spirits and dancing everywhere, And for a Croydon surveyor's 0:05:07.120 --> 0:05:09.440 clerk just out of an office, this was like a 0:05:09.520 --> 0:05:13.320 holiday at the sea. It was a day for high adventure, 0:05:13.520 --> 0:05:15.760 and his heart rose up to meet the mood of nature. 0:05:16.279 --> 0:05:18.400 His umbrella with the silver ring ought to have been 0:05:18.440 --> 0:05:21.200 a sword, and his brown shoes should have been top 0:05:21.240 --> 0:05:24.760 boots with spurs on the heels. Where hid the enchanted 0:05:24.800 --> 0:05:27.160 castle in the princess with the hair of sunny gold. 0:05:27.680 --> 0:05:31.480 His horse, the Style, suddenly came into view and nipped 0:05:31.480 --> 0:05:35.159 adventure in the bud. Everyday clothes took him prisoner again. 0:05:35.680 --> 0:05:39.320 He was a surveyor's clerk, middle aged, earning three pounds 0:05:39.360 --> 0:05:42.440 a week, coming from Croydon to see about a client's 0:05:42.480 --> 0:05:46.039 proposed alterations in a wood, something to ensure a better 0:05:46.120 --> 0:05:49.520 view from the dining room window. Across the fields, perhaps 0:05:49.560 --> 0:05:52.279 a mile away. He saw the red house gleaming in 0:05:52.320 --> 0:05:55.159 the sunshine, and resting on the Style a moment to 0:05:55.200 --> 0:05:57.800 get his breath, he noticed the copes of oak and 0:05:57.839 --> 0:06:01.320 horn beam on the right. Aha, he told himself, so 0:06:01.400 --> 0:06:03.360 that must be the wood he wants to cut down 0:06:03.440 --> 0:06:05.840 to improve the view. I'll have a look at it. 0:06:06.800 --> 0:06:09.080 There were boards up, of course, but there was an 0:06:09.080 --> 0:06:12.840 inviting little path as well. I'm not a trespasser, he said, 0:06:13.120 --> 0:06:16.520 It's part of my business. This is he scrambled awkwardly 0:06:16.560 --> 0:06:19.799 over the gate and entered the copes. A little round 0:06:19.839 --> 0:06:23.560 would bring him to the field again. My turn, take 0:06:23.600 --> 0:06:26.240 it away, chuckers. All right, here we go. Should we 0:06:26.240 --> 0:06:28.240 catch people up? What's this guy doing? He's walking a lot, 0:06:28.480 --> 0:06:31.240 he's walking. He's walking, and he's going to be a 0:06:31.279 --> 0:06:33.400 client who wants to cut down some woods. And he 0:06:33.440 --> 0:06:36.919 thinks he's just now found the woods. All but the 0:06:36.960 --> 0:06:39.520 moment he passed among the trees, the wind ceased shouting, 0:06:39.520 --> 0:06:42.320 and a stillness dropped upon the world. So dense was 0:06:42.360 --> 0:06:46.080 the growth that the sunshine only came through and isolated patches. 0:06:46.600 --> 0:06:50.080 The air was close. He mopped his forehead, but his 0:06:50.160 --> 0:06:52.960 green felt hat on, but a low branch knocked it 0:06:52.960 --> 0:06:56.120 off again at once, and as he stooped, an elastic 0:06:56.120 --> 0:07:04.200 twig swung back and stung his face. There were flowers along, sorry, 0:07:04.520 --> 0:07:07.000 there were flowers along both edges of the little path, 0:07:07.200 --> 0:07:12.520 glades open on either side, Ferns curved about in damper corners, 0:07:12.840 --> 0:07:16.080 and the smell of earth and foliage was rich and sweet. 0:07:17.760 --> 0:07:20.840 It was cooler here. What an enchanting little wood, he thought, 0:07:21.240 --> 0:07:23.960 turning down a small green glade where the sunshine flickered 0:07:24.000 --> 0:07:28.080 like silver wings. How it danced and fluttered and moved about. 0:07:28.680 --> 0:07:30.680 He put a dark blue flower in his button hole. 0:07:31.680 --> 0:07:37.119 M whatever floats your boat foal again? His hat caught 0:07:37.160 --> 0:07:40.280 by an oak branch as he rose, was knocked from 0:07:40.280 --> 0:07:44.040 his head, falling across his eyes. This guy's a mess, 0:07:45.080 --> 0:07:47.000 and this time he did not put it on again. 0:07:47.320 --> 0:07:51.280 Swinging his umbrella, he walked on with uncovered head, whistling 0:07:51.360 --> 0:07:54.120 rather loudly as he went. But the thickness of the 0:07:54.160 --> 0:07:57.920 trees hardly encouraged whistling, and something of his gaiety and 0:07:58.000 --> 0:08:01.400 high spirit seemed to leave him. He suddenly found himself 0:08:01.400 --> 0:08:05.880 treading circumspectly and with caution. The stillness in the wood 0:08:06.000 --> 0:08:09.320 was so peculiar. There was a rustle among the ferns 0:08:09.320 --> 0:08:12.120 and leaves, and something shot across the path ten yards ahead. 0:08:12.560 --> 0:08:16.440 Stopped abruptly. An instant with head cocked sideways to stare, 0:08:16.880 --> 0:08:19.440 then dived again beneath the underbrush with the speed of 0:08:19.440 --> 0:08:23.320 a shadow. He started like a frightened child, laughing the 0:08:23.360 --> 0:08:25.840 next second that a mere pheasant could have made him jump. 0:08:26.560 --> 0:08:28.920 In the distance, he heard wheels upon the road and 0:08:28.960 --> 0:08:33.000 wondered why the sound was pleasant good Old Butcher's Cot, 0:08:33.440 --> 0:08:36.559 he said to himself, his accent changed. I guess I 0:08:36.720 --> 0:08:42.280 like it. I'm not. I'm not sure where he's from. 0:08:42.440 --> 0:08:45.840 Good Old Butcher's Cot, he said to himself. Then realized 0:08:45.880 --> 0:08:48.120 that he was going in the wrong direction and had 0:08:48.160 --> 0:08:51.280 somehow got turned round, for the road should be behind him, 0:08:51.280 --> 0:08:54.080 not in front, and he hurriedly took another narrow glade 0:08:54.120 --> 0:08:57.560 that lost itself in greenness to the right. That's my direction, 0:08:57.600 --> 0:09:01.160 of course, he said. How he's show connor. I think 0:09:01.240 --> 0:09:04.880 so all right. The trees has mixed me up a bit, 0:09:04.920 --> 0:09:08.360 it seems. Then found himself abruptly by the gate he 0:09:08.360 --> 0:09:11.680 had first climbed over. He had merely made a circle. 0:09:12.559 --> 0:09:17.280 Surprise became almost discomfiture. Then it's a new one for me. 0:09:18.200 --> 0:09:21.240 And a man dressed like a gamekeeper in brownie green 0:09:21.840 --> 0:09:24.520 leaned against the gate, hitting his legs with a switch. 0:09:25.480 --> 0:09:29.560 I'm making for Mr Lumley's farm, explained the walker. This 0:09:29.760 --> 0:09:33.400 is his wood, I believe, then stopped dead because it 0:09:33.480 --> 0:09:36.160 was no man at all, but merely an effect of 0:09:36.280 --> 0:09:40.120 light and shade and foliage. He stepped back to reconstruct 0:09:40.120 --> 0:09:43.280 the singular illusion, but the wind shook the branches roughly 0:09:43.320 --> 0:09:45.680 here on the edge of the wood. The foliage refused 0:09:45.679 --> 0:09:49.959 to reconstruct the figure, leaves all rustled strangely. Just then 0:09:49.960 --> 0:09:52.240 the sun went behind a cloud, making the whole would 0:09:52.320 --> 0:09:55.760 look otherwise. Yet how the mind could be thus doubly 0:09:55.840 --> 0:09:59.160 deceived was indeed remarkable, for it almost seemed to him 0:09:59.200 --> 0:10:02.960 the man had sward spoken, or was this the shuffling 0:10:03.000 --> 0:10:06.680 noise the branches made, and had pointed with this switch 0:10:07.280 --> 0:10:11.240 to the notice board upon the nearest tree. The words 0:10:11.360 --> 0:10:13.440 rang on in his head, but of course he had 0:10:13.440 --> 0:10:19.160 imagined them. No, it's not his wood, it's ours. That's 0:10:19.280 --> 0:10:23.360 good stuff. And some village wit moreover had changed the 0:10:23.440 --> 0:10:26.400 lettering on the weather beaten board, for it read quite plainly, 0:10:27.000 --> 0:10:34.440 trespassers will be persecuted. Teenagers no skateboarding either. And while 0:10:34.480 --> 0:10:36.960 the astonished clerk read the words and chuckled, he said 0:10:37.000 --> 0:10:39.480 to himself, thinking what a tale he'd have to tell 0:10:39.520 --> 0:10:42.319 his wife and children later. The blooming wood has tried 0:10:42.360 --> 0:10:45.520 to chuck me out. But I'll go in again. Why 0:10:45.559 --> 0:10:47.880 it's only a matter of a square acre at most. 0:10:48.320 --> 0:10:50.120 I'm bound to reach the fields on the other side 0:10:50.160 --> 0:10:53.560 if I keep straight on here This guy's really all 0:10:53.600 --> 0:10:55.480 over the place of ny. I feel like he's kind 0:10:55.480 --> 0:10:59.199 of settled into a real weird accent. But I like it. 0:11:00.120 --> 0:11:02.280 He remembered his position in the office. He had a 0:11:02.320 --> 0:11:07.360 certain dignity to maintain. So he's he's freaking out a 0:11:07.360 --> 0:11:10.520 little bit, like the woods are like playing tricks on him. 0:11:10.520 --> 0:11:13.440 It seems like the lst is kicking in for sure. 0:11:14.200 --> 0:11:16.360 He's like, I shouldn't have plucked that weird mushroom from 0:11:16.400 --> 0:11:22.360 that cow poop, okay, m The cloud passed from below 0:11:22.400 --> 0:11:25.040 the sun and light splashed suddenly in all manner of 0:11:25.120 --> 0:11:29.080 unlikely places. The man went straight on. He felt a 0:11:29.160 --> 0:11:32.959 touch of puzzling confusion somewhere this way the copes had 0:11:32.960 --> 0:11:36.880 of shifting from sunshine into shadow doubtless troubled site a little. 0:11:37.440 --> 0:11:40.280 To his relief, at last a new glade open through 0:11:40.320 --> 0:11:43.040 the trees and just closed the fields with the glimpse 0:11:43.080 --> 0:11:45.320 of the red house in the distance at the far end. 0:11:46.160 --> 0:11:48.760 But a little wicked gate that stood across the path 0:11:48.880 --> 0:11:51.800 had to first be climbed, and as he scrambled heavily 0:11:51.840 --> 0:11:54.320 over it for it would not open, he got the 0:11:54.360 --> 0:11:58.600 astonishing feeling that it slid off sideways beneath his weight 0:11:58.920 --> 0:12:02.520 toward the wood like the moving staircases at Herod's in 0:12:02.559 --> 0:12:06.600 Earl's Court, and I think he's talking about escalators. It 0:12:06.679 --> 0:12:09.960 began to glide off with him. It was quite horrible, 0:12:10.320 --> 0:12:12.640 and he made a violent effort to get down before 0:12:12.640 --> 0:12:15.640 it carried him into the trees. But his feet became 0:12:15.840 --> 0:12:18.360 entangled with the bars and umbrella, so that he fell 0:12:18.440 --> 0:12:21.960 heavily upon the farther side. Arms spread across the grass, 0:12:21.960 --> 0:12:25.920 and nettles boots clutched between the first and second bars. Suddenly, 0:12:25.960 --> 0:12:29.600 Benny Hill came around the corner. Maybe Jerry will add 0:12:29.679 --> 0:12:34.240 yakety sacks to that part. Oh, that'd be great. He 0:12:34.320 --> 0:12:36.960 lay there a moment like a man crucified upside down, 0:12:38.000 --> 0:12:41.000 and while he struggled to get disentangled, feet, bars and 0:12:41.120 --> 0:12:44.079 umbrella formed a regular net. He saw the little man 0:12:44.160 --> 0:12:47.680 in Brownie Green go past him with extreme rapidity through 0:12:47.679 --> 0:12:51.240 the wood. The man was laughing. He passed across the 0:12:51.280 --> 0:12:54.080 glades some fifty yards away, and he was not alone 0:12:54.120 --> 0:12:58.000 this time. A companion like himself went with him. The clerk, 0:12:58.280 --> 0:13:01.040 now upon his feet again, watched them disappear into the 0:13:01.040 --> 0:13:04.280 gloom of green beyond. You want to take this quote 0:13:05.040 --> 0:13:10.880 that tramps not gamekeepers. He said to himself, half mortified, 0:13:11.040 --> 0:13:16.000 half angry, apparently half deranged. But his heart was thumping dreadfully, 0:13:16.240 --> 0:13:19.960 and he dared not utter all his thought. He examined 0:13:19.960 --> 0:13:23.000 the wicket gate, convinced it was a trick gate somehow, 0:13:23.440 --> 0:13:26.840 then went hurriedly on again, disturbed beyond belief to see 0:13:26.840 --> 0:13:29.680 that the glade no longer opened into the fields, but 0:13:29.760 --> 0:13:32.800 curved away to the right. What in the world had 0:13:32.880 --> 0:13:36.760 happened to him? His sight was so utterly at fault again. 0:13:36.800 --> 0:13:39.360 The sun flamed out abruptly and lit the floor of 0:13:39.400 --> 0:13:42.240 woods with pools of silver, And at the same moment 0:13:42.240 --> 0:13:46.080 a violent gust of wind passed, shouting overhead. Drops fell 0:13:46.120 --> 0:13:49.959 clattering everywhere upon, the leaves making a sharp pattering as 0:13:49.960 --> 0:13:53.360 of many footsteps. The whole coat shuddered and went moving 0:13:54.480 --> 0:13:58.160 chuck brain by. George thought the clerk, and, feeling for 0:13:58.200 --> 0:14:01.480 his umbrella, discovered he had lost it. He turned back 0:14:01.520 --> 0:14:03.720 to the gate and found it lying on the farther side. 0:14:04.280 --> 0:14:06.520 To his amazement, he saw the fields at the far 0:14:06.640 --> 0:14:09.199 end of the glade. The red house too, shine in 0:14:09.240 --> 0:14:12.680 the sunset. He laughed, then, for of course and his 0:14:12.720 --> 0:14:15.600 struggles with the gate, he had somehow got turned around, 0:14:16.080 --> 0:14:20.160 had fallen back instead of forwards. Climbing over this time 0:14:20.280 --> 0:14:23.760 quite easily, he retraced his steps. The silver band he 0:14:23.800 --> 0:14:26.440 saw had been torn off of the umbrella, no doubt, 0:14:26.480 --> 0:14:29.120 his foot, a nail or something had caught in it 0:14:29.160 --> 0:14:32.400 and ripped it off. The clerk began to run. He 0:14:32.480 --> 0:14:37.080 felt extraordinarily dismayed. But while he ran, the entire wood 0:14:37.160 --> 0:14:40.800 ran with him round him, to and fro, trees shifting 0:14:40.840 --> 0:14:45.560 like living things, leaves folding and unfolding, trunks darting backwards 0:14:45.560 --> 0:14:49.120 and forwards, and branches disclosing enormous empty spaces and then 0:14:49.200 --> 0:14:51.760 closing up again before he could look into them. There 0:14:51.760 --> 0:14:55.760 were footsteps everywhere, and laughing, crying voices, and crowds of 0:14:55.800 --> 0:14:58.720 figures gathering just behind his back, till the glade he 0:14:58.800 --> 0:15:02.480 knew was thick with moving life. The wind in his ears, 0:15:02.520 --> 0:15:05.320 of course, produced the voices in the laughter, while the 0:15:05.320 --> 0:15:08.800 sun and clouds plunging the copes alternately in shadow and 0:15:08.920 --> 0:15:12.120 bright dazzling light, created the figures. But he did not 0:15:12.240 --> 0:15:14.720 like it. And when as fast as ever his sturdy 0:15:14.760 --> 0:15:18.000 legs could take it, he was frightened. Now this was 0:15:18.040 --> 0:15:20.720 no story for his wife and children. He ran like 0:15:20.760 --> 0:15:23.800 the wind, but his feet made no sound upon the soft, 0:15:23.880 --> 0:15:32.080 mossy turf. Oh boy, it's getting real. It's getting surreal. Then, 0:15:32.160 --> 0:15:35.040 to his horror, he saw that the glade grew narrow, 0:15:35.440 --> 0:15:38.680 nettles and weeds stood thick across it. It dwindled down 0:15:38.720 --> 0:15:41.920 into a tiny path, and twenty yards ahead it stopped 0:15:41.960 --> 0:15:45.840 finally and melted off among the trees. What the trick 0:15:45.920 --> 0:15:49.600 gate had failed to achieve, this twisting glade accomplished easily 0:15:50.080 --> 0:15:53.280 carried him in bodily among the dense and crowding tree 0:15:56.840 --> 0:16:00.960 You you wanna take his home? It s get freaky, Chuck. 0:16:02.000 --> 0:16:04.200 There was only one thing to do. Turned sharply and 0:16:04.280 --> 0:16:07.200 dash back again, run headlong into the life that followed 0:16:07.200 --> 0:16:10.760 at his back, followed so closely too, that now it 0:16:10.760 --> 0:16:14.040 almost touched him, pushing him in. And with reckless courage, 0:16:14.800 --> 0:16:17.400 that was what he did. It seemed a fearful thing 0:16:17.440 --> 0:16:20.000 to do. He turned with a sort of violent spring, 0:16:20.040 --> 0:16:23.440 head down and shoulders forward, hands stretched before his face. 0:16:23.920 --> 0:16:27.000 He made the plunge like a hunted creature. He charged 0:16:27.160 --> 0:16:29.480 full tilt the other way, meeting the wind, and now 0:16:29.520 --> 0:16:32.080 in his face. Good Lord, the glade behind him and 0:16:32.160 --> 0:16:34.800 closed up as well. There was no longer any path 0:16:34.880 --> 0:16:37.760 at all, Turning round and round like an animal at bay. 0:16:38.200 --> 0:16:42.200 He searched for an opening, a way of escape, searched frantically, breathlessly, 0:16:42.720 --> 0:16:45.920 terrified now in his bones. But foll leyad surrounded him. 0:16:46.120 --> 0:16:49.440 Branches blocked the way. The tree stood close and still, 0:16:49.840 --> 0:16:52.720 unshaken by a breath of wind, and the sun dipped 0:16:52.840 --> 0:16:56.520 that moment behind a great black cloud. The entire wood 0:16:56.560 --> 0:17:00.600 turned dark and silent, had watched him. Is not good 0:17:01.360 --> 0:17:03.640 when the woods are watching you. That's bad news. It's 0:17:03.640 --> 0:17:06.680 worse than a cat. That's like that Jodie Foster movie 0:17:06.720 --> 0:17:09.239 from the seventies, The Watcher in the Woods. Was that 0:17:09.440 --> 0:17:12.360 Jodie Foster? Yeah, I was so scary. I remember that one, 0:17:12.480 --> 0:17:15.520 and Betty Davis I think too. That's right, we should 0:17:15.560 --> 0:17:18.119 have just played that instead of doing this. I feel 0:17:18.119 --> 0:17:21.000 like we just broke all the tension we'd built over 0:17:21.040 --> 0:17:23.800 the last ten minutes. Okay, here we go, Everyone al right, 0:17:23.840 --> 0:17:27.200 the woods are watching. Perhaps it was this final touch 0:17:27.200 --> 0:17:30.159 of sudden blackness that made him act so foolishly, as 0:17:30.200 --> 0:17:32.720 though he had really lost his head at any rate. 0:17:32.920 --> 0:17:35.960 Without pausing to think, he dashed headlong in among the trees. Again, 0:17:36.520 --> 0:17:39.840 there was a sensation of being stifling lye surrounded and entangled, 0:17:40.240 --> 0:17:42.840 and that he must break out at all costs, out 0:17:42.880 --> 0:17:44.840 in a way into the open of the blessed fields 0:17:44.840 --> 0:17:48.120 and air. He did this ill considered thing, and apparently 0:17:48.200 --> 0:17:51.240 charged straight into an oak that deliberately moved into his 0:17:51.280 --> 0:17:53.919 path to stop him. He saw it shift across a 0:17:53.960 --> 0:17:57.199 good full yard, and being a measuring man accustomed to 0:17:57.400 --> 0:18:01.080 theodolite and chain, he ought to know, do you know 0:18:01.119 --> 0:18:03.440 what that is? No? Do you the chain? I think 0:18:03.480 --> 0:18:05.280 I mean he's a surveyor, says gut has something to 0:18:05.280 --> 0:18:07.240 do with that. But who knows what the light is? 0:18:07.400 --> 0:18:10.960 And I think it's a measuring compound. Sure he fell, 0:18:11.080 --> 0:18:14.479 saw stars and felt a thousand tiny fingers tugging and 0:18:14.480 --> 0:18:18.360 pulling in his hands and neck and ankles. The stinging nettles, 0:18:18.359 --> 0:18:21.560 no doubt, were responsible for this, he thought of it later. 0:18:22.200 --> 0:18:26.720 At the moment it felt diabolically calculated. But another remarkable 0:18:26.720 --> 0:18:29.960 illusion was not so easily explained. For all, in a moment, 0:18:30.000 --> 0:18:32.760 it seemed the entire wood went sliding past him with 0:18:32.800 --> 0:18:36.600 a thick, deep rustling of leaves and laughter, myriad footsteps 0:18:36.960 --> 0:18:41.080 and tiny little active energetic shapes. Two men in brownie 0:18:41.160 --> 0:18:43.800 green gave him a mighty hoist, and he opened his 0:18:43.840 --> 0:18:46.639 eyes to find himself lying in the meadow beside the 0:18:46.680 --> 0:18:50.720 style where first his incredible adventure had begun. The wood 0:18:50.760 --> 0:18:53.760 stood in its usual place and stared down upon him 0:18:53.760 --> 0:18:56.199 in the sunlight. There was the red house in the 0:18:56.280 --> 0:19:00.000 distance as before above him grinned the weather beaten noticeable 0:19:00.000 --> 0:19:04.600 word trespassers will be prosecuted, disheveled in mind and body, 0:19:04.920 --> 0:19:07.600 and a good deal shaken in his official soul. The 0:19:07.640 --> 0:19:10.720 clerk walked slowly across the fields, but on the way 0:19:10.760 --> 0:19:14.399 he glanced once more at the postcard of instructions and 0:19:14.440 --> 0:19:17.879 saw with dull amazement that the inked out sentence was 0:19:18.000 --> 0:19:21.159 quite legible after all. Beneath the scratches made across it, 0:19:22.040 --> 0:19:24.679 there is a shortcut through the wood. The would I 0:19:24.760 --> 0:19:26.920 want to cut down if you care to take it? 0:19:27.320 --> 0:19:30.639 Only care was so badly written it looked more like 0:19:30.720 --> 0:19:35.840 another word. The sea was uncommonly like d. That's the 0:19:35.880 --> 0:19:38.480 copes that spoils my view of the downs. You see, 0:19:38.920 --> 0:19:41.720 His client explained, to him, later, pointing across the fields 0:19:42.080 --> 0:19:44.880 and referring to the ordinance map beside him. I want 0:19:44.880 --> 0:19:47.240 to cut down in a path made so and so 0:19:49.000 --> 0:19:52.960 it's precise. His finger indicated direction on the map. The 0:19:53.040 --> 0:19:56.480 fairy Wood, it's still called, and it's far older than 0:19:56.520 --> 0:19:59.679 this house. Come now, if you're ready, Mr Thomas, we 0:19:59.760 --> 0:20:03.640 might go out and have a look at it. Oh boy. 0:20:03.800 --> 0:20:07.480 So basically the shot, Oh yeah, there you got the end. 0:20:08.240 --> 0:20:10.600 So basically the upshot of this one, Chuck, is that 0:20:10.640 --> 0:20:14.919 this guy is very lucky that the possessed would spit 0:20:15.000 --> 0:20:19.040 him out and didn't keep him in there forever like 0:20:19.119 --> 0:20:23.320 that island did it too, Amelia Earhart, that's right? And 0:20:23.520 --> 0:20:27.240 Rowse Beers man bringing the civil engineering horror that was 0:20:27.280 --> 0:20:31.640 Algernon Blackwood. Would I say, Ambrose Beers, that's a common mistake, 0:20:31.960 --> 0:20:38.160 it really. I like I like the I like Algernon Blackwood. Yeah, 0:20:38.200 --> 0:20:40.880 he's great. He did the Empty House, which we read 0:20:40.960 --> 0:20:45.280 once a few years back. So there you go. How 0:20:45.359 --> 0:20:48.520 scared is everybody? Raise your hand if you're scared me. 0:20:49.200 --> 0:20:51.879 That's not bad, not bad. Two out of three people 0:20:52.080 --> 0:20:54.560 isn't bad. All right, So we're gonna move on to 0:20:55.320 --> 0:20:59.800 Ed Garland Poe and uh, because it's in the public 0:20:59.800 --> 0:21:05.679 don't main, dude, there's there. It's true, it is true, 0:21:06.000 --> 0:21:09.960 it's in the public domain. I'm gonna get started in 0:21:10.000 --> 0:21:13.760 my searching earlier next year. Yeah, or we could just 0:21:13.800 --> 0:21:17.879 start saving up um and just like buy the rights 0:21:17.920 --> 0:21:20.679 to read one. Yeah, I mean there are there are stories. 0:21:20.680 --> 0:21:22.600 It's about getting in touch with the authors that are 0:21:22.760 --> 0:21:25.240 still living. Sure, it's like I found a good Joyce 0:21:25.280 --> 0:21:29.199 Carol oateswin and all she all she writes is the 0:21:29.240 --> 0:21:32.000 best horror ever. For my money, I would say that 0:21:32.040 --> 0:21:34.920 she's probably my favorite author in general, but I would 0:21:34.920 --> 0:21:39.320 say she's probably the greatest horror writer of all time. Too. Well, 0:21:39.520 --> 0:21:41.160 I'm gonna get in touch with her. We're gonna buddy 0:21:41.240 --> 0:21:43.600 up over the next year. Oh good, we'll loot me 0:21:43.640 --> 0:21:45.720 into that. Yeah, for sure, we're gonna bring the oats 0:21:45.760 --> 0:21:49.119 next year. Okay, Yeah. I tweeted to her wants to 0:21:49.200 --> 0:21:52.280 ask her, and she just ignored it. Really Yeah that 0:21:52.359 --> 0:21:55.240 was before your big shot. No, this is like last year, 0:21:57.359 --> 0:22:00.760 which I guess that that's the hole's true. So yes, 0:22:00.800 --> 0:22:02.960 you're right. All right. Here we go with a story 0:22:03.240 --> 0:22:07.240 by Edgar Allen Poe. Uh, noted drunk and drug addict 0:22:08.280 --> 0:22:13.800 died in the street. Really, Oh yeah, Baltimore, right in 0:22:13.840 --> 0:22:20.480 front of Powers Station Live. Yeah, is there a marker? Yes, 0:22:20.560 --> 0:22:22.359 it's actually not right in front of it. It's like 0:22:22.359 --> 0:22:24.439 a street or so over. And I don't remember if 0:22:24.480 --> 0:22:26.560 it's this house or if it is the place where 0:22:26.560 --> 0:22:28.360 he died. I think it is the spot where he died. 0:22:28.359 --> 0:22:31.359 It's like a street or two over in Baltimore. Yeah, 0:22:31.440 --> 0:22:33.600 it's worth visiting for sure. All right. So this is 0:22:33.640 --> 0:22:40.320 a post short story called hop Frog silly name, ghoulish content. 0:22:41.240 --> 0:22:45.840 Yes you ready? Do you want to start? You go ahead? No? 0:22:46.000 --> 0:22:50.800 I finished that one. Don't you start this one? Okay? Uh, okay, 0:22:50.920 --> 0:22:53.639 I don't have my imparstell either. We'll just wing it. Okay, 0:22:53.800 --> 0:22:57.520 just uh just go coco cocoa or wink or something. 0:22:57.560 --> 0:23:08.520 I don't know. All right, you're ready. H I never 0:23:08.600 --> 0:23:11.679 knew anyone so keenly alive to a joke as the 0:23:11.760 --> 0:23:16.320 King was. He seemed to live only for joking. To 0:23:16.440 --> 0:23:19.119 tell a good story of the joke kind, and to 0:23:19.200 --> 0:23:22.040 tell it well, was the surest road to his favor. 0:23:22.920 --> 0:23:25.879 Thus it happened that his seven ministers were all noted 0:23:25.960 --> 0:23:29.320 for their accomplishments as jokers. They all took after the 0:23:29.400 --> 0:23:34.000 King too, in being large, corpulent, oily men, as well 0:23:34.040 --> 0:23:38.480 as inimitable jokers. Whether people grow fat by joking, or 0:23:38.520 --> 0:23:41.240 whether there is something in fat itself which p disposes 0:23:41.280 --> 0:23:44.639 to joke, I've never been quite able to determine, But 0:23:44.800 --> 0:23:47.600 certainly it is that a lean joker is a rara 0:23:47.720 --> 0:23:53.840 avis in terrorists, said the heroin addict about the refinements, or, 0:23:53.920 --> 0:23:56.520 as he called them, the ghost of wit. The King 0:23:56.600 --> 0:24:00.439 troubled himself very little. He had an especial admiration for 0:24:00.600 --> 0:24:03.720 breadth in a jest, and would often put up with 0:24:03.840 --> 0:24:08.080 length for the sake of it. Over niceties wearied him. 0:24:08.080 --> 0:24:11.520 He would have preferred, Man, this is gonna make zero 0:24:11.560 --> 0:24:14.240