WEBVTT - Dreams Are Free

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<v Speaker 1>Hey, ba fan, Mandy here or Mandra, you can call

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<v Speaker 1>me Mandra, that's fine. I have a simple request for you, guys.

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<v Speaker 1>We get so many questions on how you can support

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<v Speaker 1>the show, and there's really a very very simple thing

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<v Speaker 1>that we need you guys to do. Open up this app,

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<v Speaker 1>open up wherever you're listening to this podcast right now,

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<v Speaker 1>and subscribe if you have the ability, especially those of

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<v Speaker 1>you who are on iTunes. We're really making a push

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<v Speaker 1>to get the show more visible. You've seen that we've

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<v Speaker 1>partnered with a fabulous new network called Westwood One. But

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<v Speaker 1>we also need the support of our listeners. So if

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<v Speaker 1>you are a listener, a loyal listener, please subscribe, And

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<v Speaker 1>a five star review, and even a written review would

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<v Speaker 1>the show. This is so so crucial. It is basically

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<v Speaker 1>So thank you very very much. Subscribe, like and review

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<v Speaker 1>the show, and we thank you so much.

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<v Speaker 2>Hey hey, hey, I always forget this is not the budget, Like, wait,

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<v Speaker 2>we're back, We're blacken arownd.

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<v Speaker 1>Hey Mandra, Hey, I feel weird that I was just like.

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<v Speaker 2>Dude, I know, Mandra came to my house and you

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<v Speaker 2>got to meet my Niecy Pooh and my nephew, my

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<v Speaker 2>nephew Pooh.

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<v Speaker 1>I did well. First of all, it was so good

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<v Speaker 1>to see you in person, it really was. And even

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<v Speaker 1>with your gimpy shoulder. I you know, I forgot about

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<v Speaker 1>your gimpy shoulder, but I was like even before that,

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<v Speaker 1>I was like, don't squeeze her too hard. But it

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<v Speaker 1>was really really good to see you. It fed my

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<v Speaker 1>soul to see and you guys will see that what

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<v Speaker 1>we were up to. It's been almost six years and

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<v Speaker 1>we have not had a fresh new luke, as they say,

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<v Speaker 1>in almost six years for the podcast. So we were

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<v Speaker 1>getting some new picks taken.

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<v Speaker 3>Yes, and honestly they were. They look fire.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm just really excited because no, they do. Because well,

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<v Speaker 2>one I brought in my makeup artist, Leela Nima. Shout

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<v Speaker 2>out to you, Mala, She's l I.

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<v Speaker 3>L I l A n E E M A on.

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<v Speaker 2>Honestly, she's great because she's fast, she's professional and like,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, Mandy and I could not look more different,

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<v Speaker 2>and yet the sleigh was was available and attainable for

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<v Speaker 2>us both, you.

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<v Speaker 1>Know, and I trusted her fully. I was like, because

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<v Speaker 1>I had to go, you know, I was. I live

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<v Speaker 1>about an hour away from tiff and so I didn't

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<v Speaker 1>know anybody locally. So I was like, but I've seen Tiffany,

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<v Speaker 1>especially lately, and I'm like, she looks good, so I

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<v Speaker 1>will trust you. Ever has been doing her face, So

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<v Speaker 1>Leila did it, and she's she's a true artist. And

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<v Speaker 1>I don't take makeup artists for granted, but she yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>like you were saying, I mean, she knows exactly what

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<v Speaker 1>medium you're using and how to make your face up

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<v Speaker 1>for that medium. And yeah, six years ago, I did

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<v Speaker 1>not have Alila. I did not have money for Alila.

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<v Speaker 4>I had.

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<v Speaker 1>I had my sad little drug store makeup and make

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<v Speaker 1>up on the train on the way to Tiffany's apartment

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<v Speaker 1>is how, you know.

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<v Speaker 2>And I looked at I looked at the picture because

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<v Speaker 2>I was like, did I get makeup done professionally?

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<v Speaker 4>No?

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<v Speaker 2>Because I know that eyelighter. That is a Tiffany special.

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<v Speaker 2>I was looking at it.

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<v Speaker 3>I was like, oh my god, that's my birds p's

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<v Speaker 3>lip gloss and that's the eyelighter.

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<v Speaker 2>I know. I was like that I noticed me. So yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>neither one of us had professional makeup. And honestly, what

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<v Speaker 2>I love about Leilah because you don't we don't look

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<v Speaker 2>because you know, she knew we wanted to look natural,

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<v Speaker 2>but it just honestly, they just look really great the pictures,

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<v Speaker 2>every picture. And then Tanta, I mean, you just she's

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<v Speaker 2>an amazing photographer.

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<v Speaker 1>So yeah, black girl magic all the way up down,

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<v Speaker 1>all the way. I mean, whenever you're around you can't.

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<v Speaker 1>It was like whenever you're around you and the people

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<v Speaker 1>us surround world, it's just all black girl magic. So

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<v Speaker 1>your sister, I'm at Tracy, Tracy el PR publicist.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it was me, and I'm sur because honestly, my

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<v Speaker 2>niece and my nephew they don't like people. The fact

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<v Speaker 2>that like we always showing me Mandy around the house

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<v Speaker 2>and they were going room to room and they're the

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<v Speaker 2>time to be like, oh there's someone on foot, let

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<v Speaker 2>me go hide in the corner. And they were just

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<v Speaker 2>like in there like, hey, hey lady, I'm like, they

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<v Speaker 2>must know me rio on you because I'm like, oh,

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<v Speaker 2>so like you like miss Mandy because y'all don't like nobody.

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<v Speaker 1>She looked like she got snacks.

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<v Speaker 2>So that was really fun. We just honestly, I just it.

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<v Speaker 2>Plus it was just so empowering because I'm not gonna lie.

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<v Speaker 2>Those pictures look so gorgeous, you know you Normally I'm

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<v Speaker 2>just at home looking like how I'm looking, you know,

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<v Speaker 2>And so when you get to take a photo and

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<v Speaker 2>you know, with like the best makeup with this amazing photographer,

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<v Speaker 2>and you look at every picture these are untouched pictures

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<v Speaker 2>and You're like, is that wah? I mean, I hope

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<v Speaker 2>Mandy posted one picture that she has. It's like, I'm like,

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<v Speaker 2>where is the lauriot? Where are where is? I don't

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<v Speaker 2>even know, like who makes makeup anymore? It looks like

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<v Speaker 2>for real? I was like no, but meaning like it

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<v Speaker 2>looked like an ad. You look so beautiful.

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<v Speaker 1>It was like it was coming from the inside. It

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<v Speaker 1>was the joy I really and I was really down

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<v Speaker 1>when we when when I showed up, it was not

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<v Speaker 1>the day in my life when it necessarily would have

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<v Speaker 1>chosen to have an entire photo shoot and had to

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<v Speaker 1>put myself on camera like I was, you know, ladies.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, it was that time of the month, and

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<v Speaker 1>I was like, why did I plan? But by the

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<v Speaker 1>time I was by the time I had like my

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<v Speaker 1>girl Stacy didn't got my curls right in the morning

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<v Speaker 1>and she lifted me all the way up. I was

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<v Speaker 1>like a pile of mud in her in her chair

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<v Speaker 1>and I just shout out to to Stacy for real,

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<v Speaker 1>because she she started my journey back to myself. And

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<v Speaker 1>then by the time you get with Tiffany and Tanta

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<v Speaker 1>with her photography and then Leela with the makeup and

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<v Speaker 1>all the good vibes, it really came from within and

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<v Speaker 1>it was, uh yeah, it was just the joy I

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<v Speaker 1>think of and also just being back together. You have

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<v Speaker 1>that giddiness of like socializing again.

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<v Speaker 4>It was.

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<v Speaker 1>It was good and I'm really glad that we we

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<v Speaker 1>captured ourselves. It's been a long time. We've been talking

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<v Speaker 1>about doing this for months and months and months, and

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<v Speaker 1>I'll be honest, I used to be like, yeah, we

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<v Speaker 1>don't really need to do Pansioner because like I've put

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<v Speaker 1>on some weight since we did the first one. But

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<v Speaker 1>you know, what screw it. Like I think at a

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<v Speaker 1>certain point you just have to accept yourself in the

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<v Speaker 1>in the space that you are. And I think my

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<v Speaker 1>mind was really in a good place, which made it

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<v Speaker 1>even more fun. So I can't wait to see for

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<v Speaker 1>y'all to see the the picks and all the fun

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<v Speaker 1>stuff we have coming up.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, speaking of minds and my mindset, so literally I

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<v Speaker 2>have been really like you know how like you hear

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<v Speaker 2>all the like mumbo it seems like mumbo jump up,

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<v Speaker 2>like mindset, change your mind set, change your life, and

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<v Speaker 2>you're like yah, yeah, yeah, YadA YadA yadasmaa, right, because

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<v Speaker 2>that's usually what I think. And I'm like, I mean,

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<v Speaker 2>I I know it, like I do believe, like you know,

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<v Speaker 2>in the general principle of course, if you're always thinking negatively,

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<v Speaker 2>negative things come about. But I have been like, that's

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<v Speaker 2>that's like kind of been the next wave. So y'all know,

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<v Speaker 2>I'll have a Zion who's my executive business coach. But

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<v Speaker 2>I also have doctor Green who's who's my professional coach,

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<v Speaker 2>and she's also a.

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<v Speaker 1>Therapist, and so you're still working with a business coach.

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<v Speaker 2>Som hm. So we have a year contract. So it's

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<v Speaker 2>up in November. If we decide to move forward, then

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<v Speaker 2>we will. So I meet with him every other week,

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<v Speaker 2>and I meet with the same thing. I meet with

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<v Speaker 2>doctor Green every other week as well. So one of

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<v Speaker 2>the things that we've been working on, because if we've

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<v Speaker 2>worked on so many different things, and you know, like

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<v Speaker 2>me feeling more like in charge of my life and

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<v Speaker 2>having the hard conversations and me, I've been making progress

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<v Speaker 2>if I do say so myself, and I do say

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<v Speaker 2>so myself. So, but then the next kind of step

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<v Speaker 2>is I've always known, not always known, but you know

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<v Speaker 2>how you know you have Like I knew I had

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<v Speaker 2>a limiting my said, because sometimes I just can't see

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<v Speaker 2>a thing even though like for example, when we had

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<v Speaker 2>Imman and.

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<v Speaker 3>Christina on oh Yeah, Christina, Yeah Arbager.

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<v Speaker 2>Remember that level of joy that they just exuded, and

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<v Speaker 2>I was like, I don't think I could get there,

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<v Speaker 2>because how do you get there? It's like sometimes it's

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<v Speaker 2>like my mind used to really block that in order

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<v Speaker 2>to be successful. I had told myself because this is

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<v Speaker 2>what the world tells you, that you have to work

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<v Speaker 2>really hard. But then if you want to go to

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<v Speaker 2>the next level of success, my assumption is like let's

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<v Speaker 2>just say, like I told you all, last year, my

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<v Speaker 2>company crossed over the ten million mark, and I was like,

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<v Speaker 2>and then someone was like, what, You're gonna go to

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<v Speaker 2>twenty million this year? And I honestly was like, I

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<v Speaker 2>don't want to because in my mind, it was so

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<v Speaker 2>much work to get to the ten. The assumption for

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<v Speaker 2>me was I have to do double the amount of

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<v Speaker 2>work to get to the twenty. And honestly, Mandy, I

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<v Speaker 2>have purposely not been doing the work. And if I

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<v Speaker 2>really look back at it, I remember even when the

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<v Speaker 2>first time I got all a's in like third grade

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<v Speaker 2>or something like that, and then my dad was like, great,

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<v Speaker 2>you could keep this up, and I remember thinking like,

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<v Speaker 2>I don't want to do the work required in order

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<v Speaker 2>to do it, because I convinced myself that the more success,

0:09:10.600 --> 0:09:13.040
<v Speaker 2>the more work involved. And so I've been trying to

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<v Speaker 2>undo that thinking, and it's been really hard, because the

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<v Speaker 2>truth is, with the right foundation, I've been relearning that

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<v Speaker 2>money is not hard to manage or make. It sounds

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<v Speaker 2>like so crazy and like, of course it's hard to make,

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<v Speaker 2>and I'm like, no, that's not true, Tiffany. If jay

0:09:33.480 --> 0:09:35.439
<v Speaker 2>Z wanted to make a million dollars. Today, he can

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<v Speaker 2>likely just pick up a call and do some sort

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<v Speaker 2>of partnership and it would be worth a million dollars

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<v Speaker 2>or more. Money With the right foundation, is not hard

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<v Speaker 2>to make. And even you might think like, oh, well,

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<v Speaker 2>of course that's jay z no no. But even me,

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<v Speaker 2>I remember one time, like this is maybe like four

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<v Speaker 2>or five years ago, we had partnered with this financial

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<v Speaker 2>brand that I really liked, and they said, we're doing

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<v Speaker 2>free investment plans and they said for every person dream

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<v Speaker 2>that gets a free investment plan, will give you twenty

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<v Speaker 2>five bucks. And I was like, okay. I went through

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<v Speaker 2>and I did the investment plan myself because I'm like,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm not sharing that with drink Catches unless I like it.

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<v Speaker 2>And I liked it because I had just paid an

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<v Speaker 2>investment advisor twelve hundred dollars and their plan that I did,

0:10:15.040 --> 0:10:18.080
<v Speaker 2>like online, was so similar to his. I realized I

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<v Speaker 2>wasted twelve hundred dollars. So that's it made me say

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<v Speaker 2>I'm going to share it. So Logan, who's my content writer,

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<v Speaker 2>I was like, okay, Logan, let's share this, and I said,

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<v Speaker 2>share the story how I just paid for a plan

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<v Speaker 2>and it is I would say ninety to ninety five

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<v Speaker 2>percent what I got what I paid twelve hundred dollars

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<v Speaker 2>for this free plan, and we sent out that email

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<v Speaker 2>girl in three days, it generated about one hundred and

0:10:45.200 --> 0:10:45.760
<v Speaker 2>fifty dollars.

0:10:45.840 --> 0:10:47.160
<v Speaker 3>One hundred and fifty thousand dollars.

0:10:48.080 --> 0:10:48.439
<v Speaker 1>That's fair.

0:10:48.480 --> 0:10:50.280
<v Speaker 2>And that was just you know what I mean, that

0:10:50.720 --> 0:10:54.240
<v Speaker 2>was just one email. And since then, I mean, I've

0:10:54.280 --> 0:10:56.760
<v Speaker 2>done partnerships with people. The last one that we did

0:10:57.000 --> 0:11:00.440
<v Speaker 2>in a weekend, we generated seven hundred thousand dollars. And

0:11:00.480 --> 0:11:05.680
<v Speaker 2>I'm sharing those big numbers because even though we've done

0:11:05.720 --> 0:11:09.640
<v Speaker 2>those things, I still was convincing myself the bigger the success,

0:11:09.760 --> 0:11:13.439
<v Speaker 2>the harder the work, and that's not true because if

0:11:13.480 --> 0:11:16.920
<v Speaker 2>that is so, then I cannot possibly work any harder

0:11:16.920 --> 0:11:19.600
<v Speaker 2>than I'm working. Now, does that mean I'm capped as

0:11:19.640 --> 0:11:22.440
<v Speaker 2>how far? With how far I can take, you know,

0:11:22.520 --> 0:11:24.880
<v Speaker 2>whatever success I seek. So I've been trying to unlearn

0:11:25.600 --> 0:11:28.760
<v Speaker 2>that like pattern, and because I had been afraid to

0:11:28.840 --> 0:11:32.200
<v Speaker 2>dream big because to me, dreaming big met working big,

0:11:32.200 --> 0:11:34.680
<v Speaker 2>and I don't want to work any harder. And so

0:11:34.800 --> 0:11:37.080
<v Speaker 2>I've just been like un learning, like you know that

0:11:37.080 --> 0:11:40.679
<v Speaker 2>that mindset. And I'll give you an example of something

0:11:40.679 --> 0:11:43.439
<v Speaker 2>where I finally realized, like, Okay, I think I'm getting it.

0:11:43.559 --> 0:11:47.920
<v Speaker 2>Like a college reached out to me and said, hey, Tiffany,

0:11:48.880 --> 0:11:51.600
<v Speaker 2>we love get it with money. We bought it for

0:11:51.640 --> 0:11:54.600
<v Speaker 2>our students, like our freshmen or whatever. Do you have

0:11:54.679 --> 0:11:58.600
<v Speaker 2>any corresponding curriculum or course? And I instantly got stressed

0:11:58.640 --> 0:12:00.520
<v Speaker 2>because I was like, oh great, so now after writing

0:12:00.520 --> 0:12:01.679
<v Speaker 2>this book for a year and a half, now I

0:12:01.720 --> 0:12:03.280
<v Speaker 2>got to write a course that's going to take me

0:12:03.320 --> 0:12:04.760
<v Speaker 2>some more time. And I don't have time, and I'm

0:12:04.760 --> 0:12:09.280
<v Speaker 2>so tired. I was already spiraling when doctor Green was like, Okay,

0:12:09.679 --> 0:12:13.520
<v Speaker 2>that is the example of that more success college bis

0:12:13.559 --> 0:12:14.960
<v Speaker 2>the course more work for Tiffany.

0:12:15.000 --> 0:12:16.200
<v Speaker 3>But is that true? Tiffany?

0:12:16.840 --> 0:12:18.640
<v Speaker 2>And I was like, She's like, is there any other

0:12:18.720 --> 0:12:21.840
<v Speaker 2>instance in your life where there's a course that you

0:12:21.880 --> 0:12:24.000
<v Speaker 2>did not have to write? That was like and I

0:12:24.040 --> 0:12:26.120
<v Speaker 2>knew exactly what she was talking about. I was like, Hey, yes,

0:12:26.480 --> 0:12:29.000
<v Speaker 2>So if y'all know, I have my literature challenges. These

0:12:29.000 --> 0:12:31.800
<v Speaker 2>are free courses that I have available to everybody at

0:12:31.840 --> 0:12:36.400
<v Speaker 2>literature challenge dot com. And the last three I hired

0:12:36.440 --> 0:12:39.120
<v Speaker 2>a course writer named Taylor, who's amazing. Taylor has been

0:12:39.120 --> 0:12:41.920
<v Speaker 2>with me for like eight years. Started as an intern.

0:12:42.080 --> 0:12:44.319
<v Speaker 2>Then I taught her how to write you know tale, Yes,

0:12:44.400 --> 0:12:46.000
<v Speaker 2>I taught her how to write courses. I taught her

0:12:46.320 --> 0:12:49.319
<v Speaker 2>write for a London Tree exactly. So Taylor was amazing.

0:12:49.800 --> 0:12:52.480
<v Speaker 2>And then I thought, Tiffany, you already wrote the book.

0:12:53.320 --> 0:12:55.880
<v Speaker 2>Why not just say hey, Taylor, here's the book. Please

0:12:55.920 --> 0:12:59.000
<v Speaker 2>turn it into a course. And I was like, oh, yeah,

0:12:59.080 --> 0:13:02.440
<v Speaker 2>so I I just tailor on Facebook. I think Taylor

0:13:02.440 --> 0:13:04.800
<v Speaker 2>lives like in Europe somewhere because she's married now to

0:13:05.000 --> 0:13:07.920
<v Speaker 2>the baby. And I was like, hey, Taylor, because I

0:13:07.960 --> 0:13:09.400
<v Speaker 2>know before she wasn't doing work and she had just

0:13:09.440 --> 0:13:11.440
<v Speaker 2>had the baby. I was like, are you still doing work?

0:13:11.760 --> 0:13:13.480
<v Speaker 2>And she said, yeah, I am now the baby's a

0:13:13.520 --> 0:13:16.600
<v Speaker 2>little older. And I said, I'm thinking about turning the

0:13:16.600 --> 0:13:18.280
<v Speaker 2>book into a course. And then I got what I

0:13:18.320 --> 0:13:19.959
<v Speaker 2>like to call god nod, which is like when you're

0:13:19.960 --> 0:13:22.120
<v Speaker 2>on the right track and you get a little nod,

0:13:22.120 --> 0:13:24.280
<v Speaker 2>a little wink from God or the universe, whatever you

0:13:24.320 --> 0:13:26.640
<v Speaker 2>believe in. And she was like, I already ordered the book.

0:13:26.640 --> 0:13:28.520
<v Speaker 3>I have it already. I was like, oh.

0:13:28.559 --> 0:13:29.839
<v Speaker 2>I was like, can you take a look at it

0:13:29.920 --> 0:13:33.240
<v Speaker 2>and see what you you know, like create a proposal

0:13:33.280 --> 0:13:35.680
<v Speaker 2>to turn into a course. So let's just say this

0:13:35.760 --> 0:13:38.560
<v Speaker 2>college wants to buy the program for one hundred thousand dollars,

0:13:38.800 --> 0:13:41.839
<v Speaker 2>and I do ten colleges. That's a million dollars right there,

0:13:42.440 --> 0:13:45.439
<v Speaker 2>And because I already had the foundation. So I'm trying

0:13:45.480 --> 0:13:49.400
<v Speaker 2>to learn that you can grow without doing this extra

0:13:49.480 --> 0:13:51.880
<v Speaker 2>heavy left and I just hope that that lands for

0:13:52.000 --> 0:13:57.160
<v Speaker 2>someone that so many of us dream cheap and small

0:13:57.480 --> 0:14:00.920
<v Speaker 2>because we have thought that like, the more the bigger

0:14:00.960 --> 0:14:04.840
<v Speaker 2>the dream, the more the work. And that's not necessarily true.

0:14:05.120 --> 0:14:09.480
<v Speaker 2>That your dreams honestly should be expansive, expensive and huge,

0:14:09.679 --> 0:14:12.360
<v Speaker 2>because dreams are free to dream. So why are we

0:14:12.360 --> 0:14:14.280
<v Speaker 2>picking up our dreams at the dollar store? Like, no,

0:14:15.000 --> 0:14:18.240
<v Speaker 2>have a huge dream, because you'd be surprised it likely

0:14:18.360 --> 0:14:20.840
<v Speaker 2>is not as much work as you think. And dreaming

0:14:20.920 --> 0:14:23.280
<v Speaker 2>small means that you also live a smaller life. And

0:14:23.560 --> 0:14:25.280
<v Speaker 2>I'm just done with that way of thinking. I want

0:14:25.280 --> 0:14:28.160
<v Speaker 2>to think like big and expansive, like Iman and Christina,

0:14:28.280 --> 0:14:31.240
<v Speaker 2>where you can have all the things. They don't have

0:14:31.280 --> 0:14:33.240
<v Speaker 2>twenty million dollars in their bank account, and yet they're

0:14:33.280 --> 0:14:36.680
<v Speaker 2>living it up and in Portugal with their amazing daughters

0:14:36.720 --> 0:14:39.840
<v Speaker 2>and having this amazing life like their dream didn't cost

0:14:39.840 --> 0:14:41.720
<v Speaker 2>as much as you would think, and here they are

0:14:42.000 --> 0:14:45.160
<v Speaker 2>super happy. Me and Mandy felt their palatable joy on

0:14:45.280 --> 0:14:47.000
<v Speaker 2>our on our I don't remember what episode that was,

0:14:47.040 --> 0:14:48.520
<v Speaker 2>but you guys should look it up. You can actually

0:14:48.520 --> 0:14:51.720
<v Speaker 2>feel their joy over and over the airwaves. So I

0:14:51.760 --> 0:14:54.760
<v Speaker 2>just wanted to share that, like that mindset shift, how

0:14:55.320 --> 0:14:56.280
<v Speaker 2>critical that is.

0:14:56.320 --> 0:14:58.800
<v Speaker 1>And you know, yeah, yeah, I think we've all had

0:14:58.800 --> 0:15:02.680
<v Speaker 1>those times in our lives where we have let the

0:15:02.720 --> 0:15:05.960
<v Speaker 1>fear of failure keep us thinking small. And I mean

0:15:06.120 --> 0:15:07.680
<v Speaker 1>for a lot of for some people, it may just

0:15:07.720 --> 0:15:10.120
<v Speaker 1>be a toxic personality in your life. I was just

0:15:10.200 --> 0:15:12.960
<v Speaker 1>on I just saw something like someone had quoted Lady

0:15:12.960 --> 0:15:16.080
<v Speaker 1>Gaga getting an interview about an ex boyfriend of hers

0:15:16.120 --> 0:15:17.840
<v Speaker 1>who said she would never have a hit song and

0:15:17.880 --> 0:15:20.080
<v Speaker 1>she would never do this, never win a grabby, all

0:15:20.080 --> 0:15:23.280
<v Speaker 1>of her dreams were dumb. And she told that person,

0:15:23.680 --> 0:15:27.400
<v Speaker 1>you know, forget you. I'm gonna one day you're not

0:15:27.400 --> 0:15:29.440
<v Speaker 1>going to be able to go to the gas station

0:15:29.520 --> 0:15:32.160
<v Speaker 1>without hearing one of my songs. And let me, of course,

0:15:32.160 --> 0:15:35.040
<v Speaker 1>look at her now, she's phenomenal. And I think in

0:15:35.080 --> 0:15:37.760
<v Speaker 1>our lives you do have like the fit like sometimes

0:15:37.800 --> 0:15:41.440
<v Speaker 1>it is like an actual person, a parent or a partner,

0:15:41.640 --> 0:15:44.080
<v Speaker 1>or a spouse or a sibling or whoever is like

0:15:44.120 --> 0:15:46.280
<v Speaker 1>your negative nancy and always bringing you down and making

0:15:46.320 --> 0:15:48.480
<v Speaker 1>you feel small. So you have to watch out for them,

0:15:48.480 --> 0:15:50.000
<v Speaker 1>but you also have to wait to watch out for

0:15:50.080 --> 0:15:52.680
<v Speaker 1>I think what tif's talking about, which is your internal dialogue,

0:15:52.720 --> 0:15:55.360
<v Speaker 1>and how you are speaking to your own self about

0:15:55.360 --> 0:15:58.320
<v Speaker 1>your dreams and what the stories that you're telling yourself

0:15:58.320 --> 0:16:01.120
<v Speaker 1>about if you have the ability to achieve what you

0:16:01.160 --> 0:16:04.200
<v Speaker 1>set out to achieve. And I couldn't agree more in

0:16:04.240 --> 0:16:07.000
<v Speaker 1>the sense that you have a lot of control, even

0:16:07.040 --> 0:16:09.720
<v Speaker 1>more control than you think, over your own destiny. But

0:16:10.080 --> 0:16:13.680
<v Speaker 1>you have to look at the fear and understand why

0:16:13.760 --> 0:16:17.640
<v Speaker 1>you feel that way, and also know that you're honestly

0:16:17.680 --> 0:16:19.320
<v Speaker 1>the only person who can change the way that you're

0:16:19.360 --> 0:16:23.560
<v Speaker 1>thinking about, whether it's your career or your relationship or

0:16:23.600 --> 0:16:25.840
<v Speaker 1>the money you have in the bank. There's so much

0:16:25.840 --> 0:16:28.200
<v Speaker 1>that you can control, but there's also like physically that

0:16:28.240 --> 0:16:30.360
<v Speaker 1>you can control. You know what job you have and

0:16:30.400 --> 0:16:33.000
<v Speaker 1>how much you're saving, but it is your mindset and

0:16:33.040 --> 0:16:35.320
<v Speaker 1>what you think is possible. And I'll tell you something

0:16:35.360 --> 0:16:37.800
<v Speaker 1>like I remember, I don't know how many years ago

0:16:37.880 --> 0:16:41.640
<v Speaker 1>was this it was like twenty four fifteen something like that.

0:16:41.960 --> 0:16:44.080
<v Speaker 1>I was like, I was in a lull in in

0:16:44.120 --> 0:16:48.400
<v Speaker 1>my confidence and stuff, and I remember, I don't know

0:16:48.440 --> 0:16:49.920
<v Speaker 1>if this fun remembers what we were on, like a

0:16:50.000 --> 0:16:51.760
<v Speaker 1>nature walk or something like that. And I was like,

0:16:51.800 --> 0:16:54.360
<v Speaker 1>you know what, I'm going to write a book that

0:16:54.480 --> 0:16:57.080
<v Speaker 1>just says the pow it's the power. It's caught and

0:16:57.120 --> 0:17:00.320
<v Speaker 1>be called The Power of Mediocrity by Mandy Woodruff. And

0:17:00.360 --> 0:17:02.560
<v Speaker 1>it's going to be a book all about how people

0:17:02.640 --> 0:17:06.080
<v Speaker 1>are so unhappy because they keep trying to like achieve

0:17:06.160 --> 0:17:08.800
<v Speaker 1>these crazy dreams and have the perfect partner and the

0:17:08.880 --> 0:17:12.199
<v Speaker 1>perfect job. What if we just stop trying? And I

0:17:12.320 --> 0:17:14.800
<v Speaker 1>was like really passionate, and this person looked at me

0:17:14.880 --> 0:17:18.399
<v Speaker 1>and he was like, I don't that sounds like good book.

0:17:18.960 --> 0:17:21.000
<v Speaker 1>People are definitely going to buy a book like that.

0:17:21.800 --> 0:17:23.560
<v Speaker 1>But I think it was just and I think about

0:17:23.560 --> 0:17:25.399
<v Speaker 1>that all the time, and I'm like you I was,

0:17:25.480 --> 0:17:27.640
<v Speaker 1>I was. It was indicative of my mindset at the time.

0:17:27.720 --> 0:17:29.720
<v Speaker 1>I would not write that book today because I think

0:17:29.760 --> 0:17:32.840
<v Speaker 1>that was just myself trying to give myself an excuse

0:17:32.920 --> 0:17:35.840
<v Speaker 1>to be to settle for or not settle, but to

0:17:35.880 --> 0:17:38.600
<v Speaker 1>be okay with what I what I had versus what

0:17:38.600 --> 0:17:40.280
<v Speaker 1>I thought I would deserve or what I thought I

0:17:40.280 --> 0:17:42.520
<v Speaker 1>could achieve. I'm not going to say it was like

0:17:42.520 --> 0:17:46.840
<v Speaker 1>a one and done conversation, but it's certainly I'm much

0:17:47.000 --> 0:17:49.159
<v Speaker 1>I'm much smarter about it now. In any time a

0:17:49.200 --> 0:17:52.840
<v Speaker 1>new whether it's a career change, or it's a new

0:17:52.840 --> 0:17:57.040
<v Speaker 1>opportunity with brown ambition, or you know, something that comes

0:17:57.119 --> 0:17:59.800
<v Speaker 1>up in my personal life, if it's new and scary

0:17:59.840 --> 0:18:03.480
<v Speaker 1>and an unknown, I just try to keep a very

0:18:03.520 --> 0:18:07.160
<v Speaker 1>open mind. There's no harm that can come from entertaining

0:18:07.200 --> 0:18:10.560
<v Speaker 1>an idea and letting that idea, you know, being open

0:18:10.640 --> 0:18:13.040
<v Speaker 1>to it. And if you have that energy of being

0:18:13.119 --> 0:18:15.840
<v Speaker 1>open to possibilities, I truly feel like and I don't

0:18:15.840 --> 0:18:18.440
<v Speaker 1>want to get too granola, but you said the universe earlier.

0:18:18.880 --> 0:18:22.520
<v Speaker 1>I think you attract stuff to you, you know, when

0:18:22.560 --> 0:18:26.120
<v Speaker 1>you have the good energy and the good vibes, and

0:18:27.119 --> 0:18:30.840
<v Speaker 1>it really does come from within. How do you get there? Tiff?

0:18:30.920 --> 0:18:31.000
<v Speaker 2>Like?

0:18:31.080 --> 0:18:33.400
<v Speaker 1>How do the people? How do you get there?

0:18:34.320 --> 0:18:34.399
<v Speaker 5>You?

0:18:34.600 --> 0:18:39.800
<v Speaker 1>For example, business coach, your life coach therapist, life coach

0:18:39.880 --> 0:18:43.879
<v Speaker 1>therapist have have helped. Yeah, I think for some like

0:18:43.920 --> 0:18:45.560
<v Speaker 1>what would you say to people who were like I

0:18:45.640 --> 0:18:47.399
<v Speaker 1>just can't get out of this funk, Like, how do

0:18:47.480 --> 0:18:48.600
<v Speaker 1>I so.

0:18:48.600 --> 0:18:49.679
<v Speaker 3>Want to change my mindset?

0:18:50.800 --> 0:18:53.840
<v Speaker 2>My friend Jessica and I think hergy is like, it's

0:18:53.880 --> 0:18:55.800
<v Speaker 2>catch me if you can. So she's the first black

0:18:55.800 --> 0:18:59.760
<v Speaker 2>woman to ever visit every country in the world and yeah,

0:19:00.160 --> 0:19:00.880
<v Speaker 2>it like two years ago.

0:19:00.920 --> 0:19:02.680
<v Speaker 3>She's amazing. So I was talking to.

0:19:02.680 --> 0:19:06.359
<v Speaker 2>Her and I was like, you know, like doing the

0:19:06.400 --> 0:19:07.439
<v Speaker 2>whole Like I don't know.

0:19:08.359 --> 0:19:11.000
<v Speaker 3>She said, Tiffany, You're dope. I'm like, I don't know.

0:19:11.560 --> 0:19:14.720
<v Speaker 2>She's like, girl, what she said, I'm gonna do for

0:19:14.760 --> 0:19:17.159
<v Speaker 2>you what I do for my other friends. She said, girl,

0:19:17.400 --> 0:19:21.200
<v Speaker 2>I am virtually slapping you, like wake up. She's like,

0:19:21.280 --> 0:19:22.920
<v Speaker 2>look to the left and look to the right of youtivity.

0:19:22.920 --> 0:19:25.080
<v Speaker 2>Who do you see nobody. I was like, oh, don't

0:19:25.080 --> 0:19:29.119
<v Speaker 2>say that. She's like, I'm sorry, No, you've created a

0:19:29.200 --> 0:19:31.720
<v Speaker 2>lane for yourself. It doesn't mean that you know that

0:19:31.760 --> 0:19:33.600
<v Speaker 2>other people are not doing amazing, but this is your

0:19:33.720 --> 0:19:36.960
<v Speaker 2>lane that you've created for yourself. What you're doing is amazing.

0:19:37.119 --> 0:19:38.960
<v Speaker 2>Step into that and I was like, I guess and

0:19:39.000 --> 0:19:40.840
<v Speaker 2>she's just like no. She said, you know what you

0:19:40.920 --> 0:19:42.359
<v Speaker 2>forgot how to dream? I want you to do this

0:19:42.440 --> 0:19:45.320
<v Speaker 2>activity And I said, okay, and I want I think

0:19:45.359 --> 0:19:47.080
<v Speaker 2>we should all do it collectively. When I tell you

0:19:47.119 --> 0:19:49.840
<v Speaker 2>it's so good, I was like, okay, So she said,

0:19:49.920 --> 0:19:52.159
<v Speaker 2>I want you to do this activity five to ten minutes.

0:19:52.760 --> 0:19:55.879
<v Speaker 2>I want you to be someplace quiet, you know, beautiful.

0:19:56.000 --> 0:19:58.760
<v Speaker 2>Maybe it's your park, maybe it's your bedom wherever, and

0:19:59.000 --> 0:20:01.520
<v Speaker 2>either on on. You could do it like on in

0:20:01.560 --> 0:20:04.000
<v Speaker 2>a journal piece of paper, or if you're someone who's

0:20:04.000 --> 0:20:05.280
<v Speaker 2>a little bit more verbal, you might want to do

0:20:05.320 --> 0:20:07.919
<v Speaker 2>a voice note and for five to ten minutes. I

0:20:07.960 --> 0:20:12.520
<v Speaker 2>want you to dream without hesitation or limitation, meaning like

0:20:13.560 --> 0:20:15.360
<v Speaker 2>I want to have a house to side with Oprah.

0:20:15.480 --> 0:20:17.240
<v Speaker 2>I want to have, you know, I want to have

0:20:17.240 --> 0:20:20.439
<v Speaker 2>twenty million dollars in my vacaccount. Like like what it

0:20:20.480 --> 0:20:23.520
<v Speaker 2>reminded me of is this weekend. I had my niece

0:20:23.560 --> 0:20:26.720
<v Speaker 2>and my nephew, Rooman and Amelia, and I asked Amelia,

0:20:26.800 --> 0:20:28.159
<v Speaker 2>I said, what do you want to do this weekend?

0:20:28.200 --> 0:20:29.600
<v Speaker 2>And she said, I want to go to the farm.

0:20:30.000 --> 0:20:32.439
<v Speaker 2>I want to go to the zoo. My friend Rihanna

0:20:32.480 --> 0:20:34.000
<v Speaker 2>has like three cats and the dog. She said, I

0:20:34.000 --> 0:20:35.840
<v Speaker 2>want to go to aunt Rihanna's house to pet the

0:20:35.880 --> 0:20:38.120
<v Speaker 2>cats and to see the dog. And then she said

0:20:38.119 --> 0:20:41.119
<v Speaker 2>something that seems so crazy. She said, I want to

0:20:41.160 --> 0:20:44.639
<v Speaker 2>go to outer space and I was like what She said, yes, Mars.

0:20:44.720 --> 0:20:45.480
<v Speaker 3>I'm like, Mars.

0:20:45.480 --> 0:20:49.760
<v Speaker 2>She said yes because it's red, because clearly she must

0:20:49.760 --> 0:20:53.080
<v Speaker 2>have watched whatever on some show and she just decided, ooh,

0:20:53.160 --> 0:20:53.879
<v Speaker 2>that looks cute.

0:20:53.920 --> 0:20:55.200
<v Speaker 3>I want to be on this red planet.

0:20:55.280 --> 0:20:57.399
<v Speaker 2>And I was just like okay, and she said I

0:20:57.440 --> 0:21:00.840
<v Speaker 2>want to take a bubble bath and I want to

0:21:00.840 --> 0:21:03.320
<v Speaker 2>do a picnic. And I was just like, so Amelia

0:21:03.400 --> 0:21:06.320
<v Speaker 2>is well, she have three she's four, but really verbal.

0:21:06.600 --> 0:21:09.320
<v Speaker 2>But I just remember thinking to myself, like that's the

0:21:09.400 --> 0:21:12.199
<v Speaker 2>kind that's when you're doing this exercise, do it with

0:21:12.359 --> 0:21:15.320
<v Speaker 2>like with a million energy. You want to go to

0:21:15.359 --> 0:21:18.440
<v Speaker 2>the park, pet the dog, you know, have a picnic,

0:21:18.640 --> 0:21:23.960
<v Speaker 2>bubble bath, Mars. Everything without hesitation, without limitation. Just let

0:21:24.000 --> 0:21:27.080
<v Speaker 2>your act as if your your your little self, your

0:21:27.119 --> 0:21:30.440
<v Speaker 2>preschool or self that didn't have any limitation. Write it down,

0:21:30.880 --> 0:21:32.800
<v Speaker 2>speak it if that's what works for best for you,

0:21:33.680 --> 0:21:34.199
<v Speaker 2>because we have.

0:21:34.240 --> 0:21:35.919
<v Speaker 3>Forgotten how to dream.

0:21:36.320 --> 0:21:38.520
<v Speaker 2>Dame Dash has his videos that just came up Mandy

0:21:38.600 --> 0:21:41.240
<v Speaker 2>that said sorry. It was like Dame Dash, you know

0:21:41.760 --> 0:21:44.280
<v Speaker 2>jay Z's ex manager. He was like, yo, I'll be

0:21:44.320 --> 0:21:47.320
<v Speaker 2>out here dreaming cheap as a dream costs money, he said, Yo.

0:21:47.280 --> 0:21:47.960
<v Speaker 3>Dreams are free.

0:21:48.000 --> 0:21:50.680
<v Speaker 2>You know that, right, That ten million dollars dream costs

0:21:50.680 --> 0:21:52.040
<v Speaker 2>you the same amount of money to have that one

0:21:52.119 --> 0:21:55.600
<v Speaker 2>hundred thousand dollars dream. So like, why are you going

0:21:55.680 --> 0:21:59.400
<v Speaker 2>cheap on your dream when it's absolutely free? And that's

0:21:59.400 --> 0:22:01.200
<v Speaker 2>what I want. And so that's one of the ways

0:22:01.240 --> 0:22:04.879
<v Speaker 2>to start that, to open up that feeling inside you,

0:22:04.880 --> 0:22:07.600
<v Speaker 2>you know that, like, let me dream big and huge.

0:22:07.640 --> 0:22:09.120
<v Speaker 2>It's not about whether you're gonna get it or out.

0:22:09.160 --> 0:22:11.480
<v Speaker 2>You're just going to say the thing. Because if you

0:22:11.520 --> 0:22:13.920
<v Speaker 2>can't dream the thing, you certainly cannot have the thing.

0:22:14.200 --> 0:22:16.439
<v Speaker 2>It's very difficult to have a thing that you that

0:22:16.480 --> 0:22:19.000
<v Speaker 2>you have not you know, at least thought about. So

0:22:19.080 --> 0:22:23.800
<v Speaker 2>it starts really from there, and it's just such a

0:22:23.840 --> 0:22:28.480
<v Speaker 2>powerful lesson and tool, right because it's just I promise you,

0:22:28.600 --> 0:22:31.879
<v Speaker 2>if you dream small, you live small, because one of

0:22:31.880 --> 0:22:33.320
<v Speaker 2>the things you will start to realize. I was talking

0:22:33.400 --> 0:22:34.720
<v Speaker 2>to a young woman today who asked me to be

0:22:34.760 --> 0:22:37.720
<v Speaker 2>her mentor, and she was was she asking me, She

0:22:37.880 --> 0:22:40.800
<v Speaker 2>was saying, you know, like, well, I don't know if

0:22:40.800 --> 0:22:43.120
<v Speaker 2>I can have that, And I said, you know, has

0:22:43.160 --> 0:22:45.720
<v Speaker 2>anybody else ever gotten that, And she said yes, And

0:22:45.760 --> 0:22:48.480
<v Speaker 2>so I'm gonna cause she was Nigeriana, Nigeria's well and

0:22:48.480 --> 0:22:50.560
<v Speaker 2>actually her name was She's the only other adochi As

0:22:50.720 --> 0:22:53.080
<v Speaker 2>I've ever met. My African name is Adoci and her

0:22:53.119 --> 0:22:56.320
<v Speaker 2>African name's Adoche as well. And she was like, I said,

0:22:56.320 --> 0:22:58.720
<v Speaker 2>you already know, Like what what would a Nigerian tell you?

0:22:58.760 --> 0:23:00.560
<v Speaker 2>She would be like, well, do they have two heads?

0:23:00.640 --> 0:23:03.320
<v Speaker 2>My dad would say that, like if I came home

0:23:03.359 --> 0:23:05.040
<v Speaker 2>with a B and I was happy about it, like

0:23:05.240 --> 0:23:09.000
<v Speaker 2>you're happy about this bee? Did anybody get a? I'm like, oh,

0:23:09.800 --> 0:23:13.359
<v Speaker 2>Mandy got a? Oh Mendy got an a? Does Mandy

0:23:13.440 --> 0:23:18.159
<v Speaker 2>have two hits? Because the implication there is unless Mandy

0:23:18.240 --> 0:23:20.960
<v Speaker 2>has two brains, why sho out here gay a's and

0:23:21.000 --> 0:23:25.000
<v Speaker 2>you ain't? Meaning aids were being given, sis go get

0:23:25.000 --> 0:23:30.200
<v Speaker 2>you one, so meaning that like people are making million, sis.

0:23:29.920 --> 0:23:33.080
<v Speaker 1>Go make you some Where's the line though, because we

0:23:33.320 --> 0:23:36.080
<v Speaker 1>I think we I mean, just to be Devil's advocate,

0:23:36.240 --> 0:23:39.760
<v Speaker 1>you can it can backfire in the sense of, you know,

0:23:40.200 --> 0:23:43.080
<v Speaker 1>looking at other people and comparing yourself constantly and never

0:23:43.160 --> 0:23:46.440
<v Speaker 1>being happy with what you've got. And I think the

0:23:46.440 --> 0:23:49.880
<v Speaker 1>the pessimist that I was that you know, not nature walk.

0:23:49.920 --> 0:23:52.440
<v Speaker 1>When I was trying to sell this book idea about mediocrity.

0:23:52.880 --> 0:23:55.560
<v Speaker 1>I think also there's a bit of there's a bit

0:23:55.600 --> 0:23:58.399
<v Speaker 1>of a lesson there in that sometimes it's like you

0:23:58.440 --> 0:24:01.879
<v Speaker 1>want to dream big, but you also have to dream

0:24:02.080 --> 0:24:05.360
<v Speaker 1>dream from a place of like a positive mindset that

0:24:05.840 --> 0:24:08.280
<v Speaker 1>you're happy with what you have, like you're you're it's

0:24:08.320 --> 0:24:11.600
<v Speaker 1>almost like you're you're comfortable and you are content, but

0:24:11.640 --> 0:24:14.360
<v Speaker 1>you're and you're not dreaming because you're not content with

0:24:14.400 --> 0:24:17.280
<v Speaker 1>the core what really matters, like your core, you know

0:24:17.359 --> 0:24:19.320
<v Speaker 1>your core self, like you know who you are, You

0:24:19.400 --> 0:24:21.119
<v Speaker 1>have your family, you have friends, you have a good

0:24:21.119 --> 0:24:23.560
<v Speaker 1>support system. You know what I'm saying, Like we're.

0:24:23.400 --> 0:24:24.960
<v Speaker 3>Not telling dreams are not like that.

0:24:25.600 --> 0:24:27.159
<v Speaker 2>When I said, amiliar, what do you want to do

0:24:27.160 --> 0:24:31.000
<v Speaker 2>this weekend? She didn't say unlike like, well, like my

0:24:31.000 --> 0:24:34.240
<v Speaker 2>my friend from preschool. I know, she's just pulling from

0:24:34.280 --> 0:24:37.560
<v Speaker 2>the experiences she she saw out of Space on whatever

0:24:37.720 --> 0:24:40.400
<v Speaker 2>Netflix things she was watching, was like, that seems cool,

0:24:40.480 --> 0:24:43.960
<v Speaker 2>want to try that? So she she knew that Rihanna

0:24:44.000 --> 0:24:45.600
<v Speaker 2>had a dog and that we've been talking about it.

0:24:45.640 --> 0:24:48.480
<v Speaker 2>That seems cool, want to try that? I think so

0:24:48.560 --> 0:24:52.360
<v Speaker 2>the key with dreaming. It's not that you're looking at

0:24:52.400 --> 0:24:55.919
<v Speaker 2>what Mandy has to say I want it because Mandy

0:24:55.960 --> 0:24:59.760
<v Speaker 2>has it. What you're looking at what Mandy has is

0:24:59.800 --> 0:25:03.320
<v Speaker 2>the evidence that it exists. You see what I mean

0:25:03.400 --> 0:25:07.040
<v Speaker 2>meaning that, wait, there are people that have accomplished this

0:25:07.359 --> 0:25:12.240
<v Speaker 2>that fills me with hope and joy. It's doable, it's doable.

0:25:12.440 --> 0:25:15.240
<v Speaker 1>Or if not that specific thing is doable, something as

0:25:15.280 --> 0:25:18.360
<v Speaker 1>big or your own version, your own version of that,

0:25:19.000 --> 0:25:21.440
<v Speaker 1>Like you're not trying to go move to Portugal, No,

0:25:21.560 --> 0:25:24.000
<v Speaker 1>not at all and have the one anchor garden like

0:25:24.080 --> 0:25:28.480
<v Speaker 1>Christina Aman. Yeah, but you're you're on your own journey

0:25:28.560 --> 0:25:30.320
<v Speaker 1>toward because of what it looks.

0:25:30.119 --> 0:25:32.800
<v Speaker 2>Like to me is I didn't like, I'm not interested

0:25:32.800 --> 0:25:35.639
<v Speaker 2>in moving to Portugal at all. But what I looked

0:25:35.640 --> 0:25:39.040
<v Speaker 2>at Iman and Christina from our rich journey is what

0:25:39.119 --> 0:25:42.679
<v Speaker 2>it made me realize is that it is possible to

0:25:42.800 --> 0:25:46.760
<v Speaker 2>find that level of joy and have done the work

0:25:47.000 --> 0:25:49.080
<v Speaker 2>and to leave it like Tiffy, you don't got to

0:25:49.119 --> 0:25:50.760
<v Speaker 2>keep going if you don't want to, like, joy can

0:25:50.800 --> 0:25:54.000
<v Speaker 2>be found, and I just so it was I looked

0:25:54.040 --> 0:25:57.320
<v Speaker 2>at them as the possibility of living in joy like that,

0:25:57.640 --> 0:25:59.800
<v Speaker 2>not that I wanted like their life, not at all,

0:26:00.119 --> 0:26:03.119
<v Speaker 2>but I wanted to, like they gave me hope, Like

0:26:03.600 --> 0:26:07.760
<v Speaker 2>this level of joy is possible in this crazy you know,

0:26:08.200 --> 0:26:12.399
<v Speaker 2>just like topsy Turvy world, we're overworking, you get a

0:26:12.400 --> 0:26:16.080
<v Speaker 2>badge for doing the most. Here are people who are

0:26:16.119 --> 0:26:18.320
<v Speaker 2>doing exactly what they wanted to do. They're not doing

0:26:18.359 --> 0:26:19.760
<v Speaker 2>the least, they're not doing the most, They're doing there

0:26:19.840 --> 0:26:22.919
<v Speaker 2>just right and are happy with it. So yeah, so

0:26:23.080 --> 0:26:25.600
<v Speaker 2>I want, yes to Mandy to your point, you're not

0:26:25.720 --> 0:26:28.840
<v Speaker 2>using other people to make yourself feel bad. It's more

0:26:28.960 --> 0:26:32.160
<v Speaker 2>so to give you the in the absence of hope,

0:26:32.640 --> 0:26:36.120
<v Speaker 2>looking to say that there is a version of that

0:26:36.200 --> 0:26:39.800
<v Speaker 2>life out there. Here's proof. Wow, it's accessible to.

0:26:39.760 --> 0:26:40.280
<v Speaker 3>Me as well.

0:26:42.359 --> 0:26:45.280
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Absolutely, Yeah.

0:26:45.280 --> 0:26:47.080
<v Speaker 2>So it's just like I just you know, wanting that

0:26:47.440 --> 0:26:51.280
<v Speaker 2>for us because I just honestly, I'm more excited because, honestly, Mandy,

0:26:51.359 --> 0:26:53.199
<v Speaker 2>up until now, even though it doesn't seem like it,

0:26:53.240 --> 0:26:56.560
<v Speaker 2>because so much has happened, I really pulled back a lot,

0:26:56.960 --> 0:27:00.600
<v Speaker 2>like meaning that I could, I could have accomplished much more,

0:27:00.640 --> 0:27:04.520
<v Speaker 2>but I purposefully do less because I've attached with accomplishing

0:27:04.520 --> 0:27:06.520
<v Speaker 2>more to working more. So I'm like, no, I'm i

0:27:06.520 --> 0:27:07.120
<v Speaker 2>gonna do a left.

0:27:07.119 --> 0:27:09.920
<v Speaker 3>No, no, no, and even more so now smarter, not harder.

0:27:10.200 --> 0:27:13.920
<v Speaker 2>Exactly, I want to do go deep instead of wide, Like, Tiffany,

0:27:14.119 --> 0:27:18.240
<v Speaker 2>how do I do accomplish more while doing less?

0:27:18.240 --> 0:27:19.440
<v Speaker 3>It is more than possible.

0:27:19.800 --> 0:27:21.680
<v Speaker 2>And now that I've opened up my mindset, all of

0:27:21.680 --> 0:27:24.879
<v Speaker 2>a sudden, many like literally, there are things that have

0:27:24.960 --> 0:27:27.840
<v Speaker 2>been there. I know Taylor eight years. I'm just now

0:27:27.880 --> 0:27:30.960
<v Speaker 2>thinking of her, you know, like, wait, all these solutions

0:27:31.000 --> 0:27:34.600
<v Speaker 2>have been here that I'm just now because I'm shifting

0:27:34.640 --> 0:27:39.360
<v Speaker 2>my mindset. I'm tapping into already existing solutions.

0:27:40.000 --> 0:27:41.200
<v Speaker 3>Like almost all.

0:27:41.040 --> 0:27:43.040
<v Speaker 2>That you're wanting is right there in front of you,

0:27:43.320 --> 0:27:46.000
<v Speaker 2>but because of the state of your mindset, you can't

0:27:46.040 --> 0:27:48.480
<v Speaker 2>see them. Not because they don't exist, not because you

0:27:48.520 --> 0:27:52.160
<v Speaker 2>have to stretch extra far and wide. It's your mindset

0:27:52.160 --> 0:27:54.119
<v Speaker 2>has blinded you to the solutions that are right in

0:27:54.160 --> 0:27:56.480
<v Speaker 2>front of you. And so I'm excited because I don't

0:27:56.520 --> 0:27:59.080
<v Speaker 2>have to do much more, just tap into what's already there.

0:27:59.040 --> 0:28:01.080
<v Speaker 2>And I'm like, oh my goodness, Tiffany, this has been

0:28:01.080 --> 0:28:02.760
<v Speaker 2>here all this time, all this time.

0:28:03.400 --> 0:28:07.119
<v Speaker 1>I'm kind of smiling because I kind of want to

0:28:07.119 --> 0:28:09.680
<v Speaker 1>break into this one song on Sesame Street that comes

0:28:09.680 --> 0:28:13.360
<v Speaker 1>on all the time, and it's so simple. But I'm

0:28:13.400 --> 0:28:15.600
<v Speaker 1>saying I think Sesame Street is having a very good

0:28:15.600 --> 0:28:17.920
<v Speaker 1>impact on mye. I love that show. I never watched

0:28:17.920 --> 0:28:19.920
<v Speaker 1>it as a kid. I was more into like Barney

0:28:20.000 --> 0:28:23.520
<v Speaker 1>and I don't know Arthur, Power Rangers, whatever, but it

0:28:23.920 --> 0:28:27.000
<v Speaker 1>those messages hit okay, And this one song is it's

0:28:27.080 --> 0:28:29.960
<v Speaker 1>very simple. The lyric it's, God, am I really going

0:28:30.040 --> 0:28:31.960
<v Speaker 1>to sing this? Okay? Fine, I'm that parent, Now do it.

0:28:33.160 --> 0:28:36.719
<v Speaker 1>It's I'm not gonna sing it. But the lyric is

0:28:37.680 --> 0:28:41.080
<v Speaker 1>I wonder what if let's try? That's the hook and

0:28:41.120 --> 0:28:44.239
<v Speaker 1>the messages when you have a problem to solve, what

0:28:44.280 --> 0:28:47.960
<v Speaker 1>do you say? You wonder? I wonder what if let's try?

0:28:48.000 --> 0:28:51.600
<v Speaker 1>And always it's a it's it's a frustrating problem. But

0:28:51.680 --> 0:28:53.720
<v Speaker 1>a lot of people and I think this was in

0:28:53.760 --> 0:28:55.640
<v Speaker 1>your book too. I'm not that you know I read it,

0:28:56.040 --> 0:28:58.960
<v Speaker 1>just you know most of it. So the piece of

0:28:58.960 --> 0:29:01.640
<v Speaker 1>it is like people can get stuck in the in

0:29:01.760 --> 0:29:04.040
<v Speaker 1>the mess, you know, or the problem or the challenge.

0:29:04.400 --> 0:29:06.680
<v Speaker 1>And I think the anecdote is about your mom being

0:29:06.720 --> 0:29:10.160
<v Speaker 1>a paper towel person, like, yeah, there's a mess, but

0:29:10.240 --> 0:29:13.320
<v Speaker 1>let's actually do something. And that message in Sesame Street

0:29:13.400 --> 0:29:15.800
<v Speaker 1>song too, is just it's such a simple message. And

0:29:16.280 --> 0:29:19.000
<v Speaker 1>I'm sure if you had asked someone like an adult,

0:29:19.240 --> 0:29:20.560
<v Speaker 1>what do you do when you have a problem, they'd

0:29:20.600 --> 0:29:22.000
<v Speaker 1>be like, yeah, you'd figure out how to fix it.

0:29:22.040 --> 0:29:24.520
<v Speaker 1>But in the moment, I think, I think the difference

0:29:24.520 --> 0:29:27.480
<v Speaker 1>between people who are successful and then think big and

0:29:27.560 --> 0:29:31.840
<v Speaker 1>achieve big things is that they don't let themselves get

0:29:31.880 --> 0:29:35.160
<v Speaker 1>lost in that misery stew Whenever you know, when there's

0:29:35.160 --> 0:29:36.800
<v Speaker 1>a problem, where there's a challenge, or it seems like

0:29:36.840 --> 0:29:39.480
<v Speaker 1>the stakes are against you, I mean, you've got to

0:29:39.560 --> 0:29:43.400
<v Speaker 1>be You've got to build that mental resilience. You've got

0:29:43.440 --> 0:29:46.160
<v Speaker 1>to And when I say like, I have had some

0:29:46.240 --> 0:29:48.120
<v Speaker 1>of the biggest knocks in my life the past couple

0:29:48.120 --> 0:29:52.280
<v Speaker 1>of years, but I have bounced back like lightning, And

0:29:52.320 --> 0:29:54.840
<v Speaker 1>I look around and I'm like, that's because I have

0:29:54.920 --> 0:30:01.640
<v Speaker 1>been building the infrastructure of mental, physical, and and emotional

0:30:01.920 --> 0:30:06.360
<v Speaker 1>well being and resilience, and through therapy, through focusing on

0:30:06.440 --> 0:30:11.240
<v Speaker 1>my sleep, through physical activity like getting back really into

0:30:11.240 --> 0:30:15.440
<v Speaker 1>good physical shape, through having joy, like spending time getting

0:30:15.480 --> 0:30:18.680
<v Speaker 1>really clear on what I value and spending time doing

0:30:18.760 --> 0:30:22.960
<v Speaker 1>those things, being outside gardening, playing like I play like

0:30:22.960 --> 0:30:26.040
<v Speaker 1>an eight year old child every day because of my kid. Like,

0:30:26.560 --> 0:30:27.960
<v Speaker 1>I know, I was late to the podcast. I was

0:30:28.000 --> 0:30:31.080
<v Speaker 1>walking in the woods, digging in the dirt with my son.

0:30:32.320 --> 0:30:33.560
<v Speaker 2>You're like, I'm in the woods.

0:30:33.720 --> 0:30:36.520
<v Speaker 1>I'm like, this funny, the street lights aren't on yet,

0:30:36.560 --> 0:30:37.400
<v Speaker 1>the where elside playing.

0:30:38.280 --> 0:30:38.520
<v Speaker 5>You know.

0:30:38.760 --> 0:30:42.920
<v Speaker 1>I'm I just and I think that that was and

0:30:43.000 --> 0:30:46.680
<v Speaker 1>thank god. But I'm like, no matter what, I genuinely

0:30:46.720 --> 0:30:49.479
<v Speaker 1>can feel that now the worst thing can happen and

0:30:49.520 --> 0:30:53.400
<v Speaker 1>it will be terrible, but I will overcome it. And

0:30:53.440 --> 0:30:56.719
<v Speaker 1>that knowledge makes me braver. And I think the choices

0:30:56.720 --> 0:31:00.000
<v Speaker 1>that I've made have gotten bigger and scarier. But I'm

0:30:59.840 --> 0:31:01.960
<v Speaker 1>I know, I'm I know, I have a soft place

0:31:02.000 --> 0:31:04.200
<v Speaker 1>to land because I've got like my you know, I've

0:31:04.200 --> 0:31:06.800
<v Speaker 1>got my survival kit. And it's not money and it's

0:31:06.800 --> 0:31:10.560
<v Speaker 1>not canned food. I mean, those things are nice. Okay, fine,

0:31:10.560 --> 0:31:12.480
<v Speaker 1>that's a lie. I do have my emergency fund, which

0:31:12.520 --> 0:31:15.440
<v Speaker 1>is very very very very nice and important. But I

0:31:15.440 --> 0:31:17.920
<v Speaker 1>also have my husband who gets on my nerves but

0:31:17.920 --> 0:31:19.760
<v Speaker 1>he's always there for me when I'm really down, and

0:31:19.840 --> 0:31:22.280
<v Speaker 1>my my baby, and I have my you know, good

0:31:22.320 --> 0:31:27.720
<v Speaker 1>relationships with my siblings and very quality friendships and of

0:31:27.760 --> 0:31:31.200
<v Speaker 1>course my partnerships like Tiffany. I mean you're also a friend,

0:31:31.200 --> 0:31:33.160
<v Speaker 1>but you're a partner and someone I can you know,

0:31:33.240 --> 0:31:35.680
<v Speaker 1>lean on. And I know that you talk about financial

0:31:35.680 --> 0:31:38.040
<v Speaker 1>wholeness in your book, but that's kind of the message too.

0:31:38.080 --> 0:31:40.560
<v Speaker 1>You know what's in your how how are you becoming

0:31:40.600 --> 0:31:45.320
<v Speaker 1>more resilient to challenges so that when you're facing with

0:31:45.360 --> 0:31:47.240
<v Speaker 1>those challenges and maybe when you're in like a negative

0:31:47.240 --> 0:31:49.760
<v Speaker 1>thought spiral and your mindset's not right, who is it

0:31:49.920 --> 0:31:53.640
<v Speaker 1>that's around you to help you, you know, snap out

0:31:53.680 --> 0:31:55.960
<v Speaker 1>of it and get back to your your place of

0:31:56.000 --> 0:31:58.160
<v Speaker 1>positivity so you can really hit your you know, reach

0:31:58.160 --> 0:31:59.000
<v Speaker 1>your full potential.

0:32:00.320 --> 0:32:02.600
<v Speaker 2>One of the best guests I ever gave to myself. Like,

0:32:02.720 --> 0:32:05.520
<v Speaker 2>so I'm forty one now, but right before my fortieth birthday,

0:32:05.520 --> 0:32:07.880
<v Speaker 2>I said, timpany enough already, and I got rid of

0:32:07.880 --> 0:32:09.440
<v Speaker 2>the very last of my bully friends.

0:32:09.520 --> 0:32:12.040
<v Speaker 3>Remember we talked about that early, you know, MILLI friends.

0:32:12.960 --> 0:32:15.600
<v Speaker 2>That's like you know people who you're like, that's my friend,

0:32:15.640 --> 0:32:17.760
<v Speaker 2>but you're like, they kind of don't treat me that great,

0:32:17.840 --> 0:32:20.680
<v Speaker 2>and you're like, wait, what are they here? I didn't

0:32:20.720 --> 0:32:23.000
<v Speaker 2>know how to stand up for myself. I didn't know

0:32:23.000 --> 0:32:24.520
<v Speaker 2>how to say hey, don't say that to me, don't

0:32:24.560 --> 0:32:28.520
<v Speaker 2>treat me that way. And so I had always since

0:32:28.600 --> 0:32:31.720
<v Speaker 2>elementary school. Not most of all my friends would be great,

0:32:31.720 --> 0:32:35.120
<v Speaker 2>but I always had one friend that I allowed to

0:32:35.160 --> 0:32:37.360
<v Speaker 2>bully me, and it would get worse year after year.

0:32:38.120 --> 0:32:40.240
<v Speaker 3>And finally at forty.

0:32:40.080 --> 0:32:44.680
<v Speaker 2>I was like, okay, you're the last of the Mooheicans

0:32:45.600 --> 0:32:48.840
<v Speaker 2>and you have to go. And it was not easy,

0:32:49.320 --> 0:32:51.600
<v Speaker 2>but it was so liberating. And when I tell you,

0:32:51.680 --> 0:32:55.360
<v Speaker 2>instantly like I felt lighter. I remember I was so

0:32:55.440 --> 0:32:58.000
<v Speaker 2>afraid of like, what's gonna happen? And am I gonna

0:32:58.000 --> 0:33:02.240
<v Speaker 2>miss this person? And I can honestly say I don't like,

0:33:02.440 --> 0:33:05.239
<v Speaker 2>I don't, not even a little bit. Maybe a key

0:33:05.320 --> 0:33:08.960
<v Speaker 2>key here and there, but no, you know, they took way.

0:33:08.800 --> 0:33:09.520
<v Speaker 3>More than they gave.

0:33:10.560 --> 0:33:12.400
<v Speaker 2>It was it was, you know, and I but I

0:33:12.440 --> 0:33:16.120
<v Speaker 2>added to that, you know, unfortunate relationship because I allowed it.

0:33:16.640 --> 0:33:17.280
<v Speaker 3>And so I'm just.

0:33:17.240 --> 0:33:20.520
<v Speaker 2>So so what I have around me now that safe

0:33:20.520 --> 0:33:23.400
<v Speaker 2>space slent every friend, I look like, it's just this

0:33:23.560 --> 0:33:26.280
<v Speaker 2>beautiful soul. I look at my friend Rihanna, the one

0:33:26.320 --> 0:33:29.120
<v Speaker 2>who designed my home. She's just the kindest person heart

0:33:29.160 --> 0:33:32.400
<v Speaker 2>her husband Jermaine, they're like me and my husband's first

0:33:32.560 --> 0:33:34.920
<v Speaker 2>couple friend. You know, we're like the guy actually likes

0:33:34.920 --> 0:33:36.200
<v Speaker 2>a guy, the girl likes a girl, and the guy

0:33:36.240 --> 0:33:38.400
<v Speaker 2>likes a girl. Like literally like all around, we're like

0:33:38.400 --> 0:33:42.560
<v Speaker 2>we love each other. So the first full fledged couple friends.

0:33:42.560 --> 0:33:46.560
<v Speaker 2>And they're amazing and kind and giving. Well, my husband

0:33:46.600 --> 0:33:48.880
<v Speaker 2>you are, you know, it's awesome. Like Mandy got to

0:33:48.880 --> 0:33:50.280
<v Speaker 2>see him and his super tall selle.

0:33:51.200 --> 0:33:54.200
<v Speaker 3>I forgot how Tlly was and he was so happy to.

0:33:54.120 --> 0:33:57.840
<v Speaker 2>See Mandy, like, oh, it's Mandy and so.

0:33:58.400 --> 0:33:59.680
<v Speaker 1>Me and the kid's just following us around.

0:34:00.080 --> 0:34:03.960
<v Speaker 2>That's really and just like but you know, just kind

0:34:04.600 --> 0:34:08.759
<v Speaker 2>and generous and and my friend Cabral same thing. When

0:34:08.760 --> 0:34:11.680
<v Speaker 2>I really look at the reflections of myself that I

0:34:11.719 --> 0:34:15.160
<v Speaker 2>see out there, it's I have the kindest, most generous friends.

0:34:15.200 --> 0:34:17.920
<v Speaker 2>I've always had good relationships with my sisters, thank goodness.

0:34:18.080 --> 0:34:20.959
<v Speaker 2>So that's always been there. But even like probably better

0:34:21.000 --> 0:34:24.120
<v Speaker 2>and tighter now, my parents were in a really.

0:34:23.840 --> 0:34:25.359
<v Speaker 3>Good space and place.

0:34:25.400 --> 0:34:27.920
<v Speaker 2>We didn't always have like the greatest relationships because you know,

0:34:28.000 --> 0:34:30.160
<v Speaker 2>teenage years, woof, it was a lot, if I do

0:34:30.239 --> 0:34:33.680
<v Speaker 2>say so myself, and I do say so myself, and

0:34:33.719 --> 0:34:36.400
<v Speaker 2>even into my twenties it was a lot. And plus

0:34:36.400 --> 0:34:39.360
<v Speaker 2>they were so strict. So but now you know as adults,

0:34:39.520 --> 0:34:42.160
<v Speaker 2>as an adult, you know, I've come to really appreciate

0:34:42.239 --> 0:34:44.959
<v Speaker 2>them and understand some of that strictness and understand why.

0:34:45.040 --> 0:34:48.120
<v Speaker 2>But we have such a great relationship now and so

0:34:48.840 --> 0:34:53.680
<v Speaker 2>myself saved my place to land. Definitely my relationships and

0:34:53.760 --> 0:34:56.840
<v Speaker 2>just how amazing they are. But what I really learned,

0:34:57.520 --> 0:35:00.000
<v Speaker 2>and I had to remember this because I had to

0:35:00.160 --> 0:35:02.600
<v Speaker 2>downpat that I lost them, Like when I first started

0:35:02.600 --> 0:35:05.480
<v Speaker 2>the budgeteast them and did a lot of reading, and

0:35:05.560 --> 0:35:09.080
<v Speaker 2>I was reading some random article about the mindset shift

0:35:09.120 --> 0:35:10.760
<v Speaker 2>from becoming a millionaire to a billionaire.

0:35:10.760 --> 0:35:12.440
<v Speaker 3>Don't ask me how I found this article.

0:35:12.239 --> 0:35:15.600
<v Speaker 2>But I remember being really curious because they found that

0:35:15.640 --> 0:35:17.520
<v Speaker 2>they had interviewed all these billionaires, and they had interviewed

0:35:17.520 --> 0:35:20.640
<v Speaker 2>all these millionaires, and they found that the way billionaires

0:35:20.680 --> 0:35:25.319
<v Speaker 2>dealt with challenges was completely different. They welcomed them and

0:35:25.360 --> 0:35:30.400
<v Speaker 2>were almost joyful by them, like joy filled literally by them.

0:35:30.680 --> 0:35:34.279
<v Speaker 2>And I thought, huh, and I remember actively practicing that.

0:35:34.360 --> 0:35:39.160
<v Speaker 2>And here's why. Because the billionaire saw the challenge as

0:35:39.239 --> 0:35:42.160
<v Speaker 2>a clear indication that they were moving from one place

0:35:42.200 --> 0:35:45.680
<v Speaker 2>to the next, that it wasn't the challenge itself, like dang,

0:35:45.760 --> 0:35:49.120
<v Speaker 2>this really sucks. It was like, wait, am I growing? Yes,

0:35:49.560 --> 0:35:52.560
<v Speaker 2>I'm finally leveling up to the next level, because this

0:35:52.719 --> 0:35:55.520
<v Speaker 2>challenge is an indication of that. And I just remember

0:35:55.600 --> 0:35:57.960
<v Speaker 2>that I used to actively practice that Mandy that like

0:35:58.120 --> 0:36:00.520
<v Speaker 2>the website is down, Yes, that means we have so

0:36:00.600 --> 0:36:02.799
<v Speaker 2>much traffic. We need to level up. You know, we

0:36:02.840 --> 0:36:05.360
<v Speaker 2>need a new email list. Yes, that means we have

0:36:05.400 --> 0:36:06.560
<v Speaker 2>so many people on the email list.

0:36:06.560 --> 0:36:08.239
<v Speaker 3>This no longer works. So I used to it in

0:36:08.280 --> 0:36:09.080
<v Speaker 3>the beginning.

0:36:08.719 --> 0:36:11.839
<v Speaker 2>With a budgetista. I was really good at making that

0:36:11.880 --> 0:36:15.759
<v Speaker 2>connection that, like, you know, a challenge happens, it's a

0:36:15.800 --> 0:36:18.919
<v Speaker 2>good thing because it meant growth. And then somewhere along

0:36:18.960 --> 0:36:20.799
<v Speaker 2>the way I forgot and I started to look at

0:36:20.840 --> 0:36:22.840
<v Speaker 2>every challenge like I normally look at challenges as.

0:36:22.920 --> 0:36:25.000
<v Speaker 3>My life, you know.

0:36:25.840 --> 0:36:28.960
<v Speaker 2>So that's what I would say that I am rediscovering

0:36:29.080 --> 0:36:33.800
<v Speaker 2>that back again to look at challenges as a clear

0:36:34.000 --> 0:36:38.000
<v Speaker 2>marker that you're shifting from where you said, where you

0:36:38.040 --> 0:36:39.880
<v Speaker 2>said that you are to where you're wanting to be,

0:36:40.360 --> 0:36:42.440
<v Speaker 2>and that this is just the challenge, is just this

0:36:42.520 --> 0:36:46.160
<v Speaker 2>little rough patch that's the line of demarcation for growth.

0:36:46.360 --> 0:36:48.640
<v Speaker 2>I was here and now I am here. This is

0:36:48.680 --> 0:36:51.440
<v Speaker 2>super exciting and so like, yeah, those are the things

0:36:51.480 --> 0:36:53.160
<v Speaker 2>that that you know, kind of put a little pep

0:36:53.200 --> 0:36:53.640
<v Speaker 2>in my step.

0:36:55.200 --> 0:36:58.520
<v Speaker 1>I love this conversation and it's an important one to have,

0:36:59.600 --> 0:37:01.919
<v Speaker 1>but also gives me a pep in my stuff these days,

0:37:01.960 --> 0:37:04.080
<v Speaker 1>is that I got my second dose of the vaccine

0:37:04.120 --> 0:37:07.600
<v Speaker 1>and it feels like this pandemonium is finally over. And

0:37:08.200 --> 0:37:11.000
<v Speaker 1>if nothing else, you guys can like build resilience by

0:37:11.080 --> 0:37:15.560
<v Speaker 1>knowing y'all made it almost almost through a pandemic. We

0:37:15.640 --> 0:37:18.480
<v Speaker 1>have all at least got that on our resumes now survived,

0:37:19.080 --> 0:37:22.920
<v Speaker 1>was resilient enough to survive, and you know, make it

0:37:22.960 --> 0:37:26.560
<v Speaker 1>through a pandemic, and that was a huge, huge challenge

0:37:26.600 --> 0:37:29.480
<v Speaker 1>for so many people. So whether you wanted to or not,

0:37:29.560 --> 0:37:32.560
<v Speaker 1>you were challenged this year, and you know, celebrate that

0:37:32.880 --> 0:37:36.600
<v Speaker 1>and get strength from that knowledge because even if you

0:37:37.280 --> 0:37:40.040
<v Speaker 1>didn't quote unquote win the pandemic, you know, by losing

0:37:40.120 --> 0:37:42.400
<v Speaker 1>the thirty pounds and getting whatever, you know, learning your

0:37:42.480 --> 0:37:45.520
<v Speaker 1>languages or you know, knill, learning how to knit or

0:37:45.560 --> 0:37:48.080
<v Speaker 1>whatever activity you were supposed to you know, become a

0:37:48.120 --> 0:37:51.440
<v Speaker 1>cook or baked bread. You know, just making it through

0:37:51.960 --> 0:37:54.799
<v Speaker 1>you have become more resilient and even just trying to

0:37:54.840 --> 0:37:58.239
<v Speaker 1>see the Yeah, flip the mindset. Flip the mindset. It's

0:37:58.239 --> 0:38:01.640
<v Speaker 1>a positive thing. It's not always easy, it's not always easy,

0:38:01.680 --> 0:38:05.399
<v Speaker 1>but the people around you, they will help you get

0:38:05.440 --> 0:38:07.440
<v Speaker 1>there when you are in that negative thought spiral. And

0:38:07.480 --> 0:38:09.520
<v Speaker 1>I will tell you if there are negative people around you,

0:38:10.000 --> 0:38:12.600
<v Speaker 1>they will thrive on that. They will thrive on it,

0:38:12.640 --> 0:38:14.160
<v Speaker 1>and they won't help lift you out of it. So

0:38:14.280 --> 0:38:17.240
<v Speaker 1>really look a look at yes, people around you, also

0:38:17.520 --> 0:38:19.520
<v Speaker 1>the you know, the thoughts in your own head and

0:38:19.520 --> 0:38:21.719
<v Speaker 1>how they may be holding you back. And and just

0:38:21.760 --> 0:38:24.200
<v Speaker 1>know that it's an ongoing process, right, It's not like

0:38:25.000 --> 0:38:28.799
<v Speaker 1>you know when there's a when there is another you know,

0:38:29.000 --> 0:38:31.120
<v Speaker 1>when I lose my confidence, which will probably happen at

0:38:31.120 --> 0:38:34.719
<v Speaker 1>some point you know down the road, I will be

0:38:34.800 --> 0:38:38.080
<v Speaker 1>able to lean on my support team, you know, support

0:38:38.160 --> 0:38:40.680
<v Speaker 1>system to build me back up. So you have to

0:38:40.840 --> 0:38:44.239
<v Speaker 1>you just just anticipate the life rainy day that it's

0:38:44.280 --> 0:38:46.080
<v Speaker 1>going to happen, you know, and really try to make

0:38:46.080 --> 0:38:47.920
<v Speaker 1>yourself ready for that moment.

0:38:48.760 --> 0:38:50.839
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, yeah, oh this is great.

0:38:50.840 --> 0:38:52.520
<v Speaker 2>This is a little boost, a little booty boosts, a

0:38:52.520 --> 0:38:53.440
<v Speaker 2>little boost to boost.

0:38:54.400 --> 0:38:57.760
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, second vaccine dose and I feel okay, I'm I'm,

0:38:58.280 --> 0:39:00.239
<v Speaker 1>I'm pretending like I didn't get it because I just

0:39:00.239 --> 0:39:02.080
<v Speaker 1>don't want to feel I know, you can feel really

0:39:02.080 --> 0:39:05.360
<v Speaker 1>fatigued and like some people get really actually they feel sick.

0:39:05.800 --> 0:39:08.200
<v Speaker 1>But I'm just like just keep going, going, going, go

0:39:08.239 --> 0:39:10.759
<v Speaker 1>to the park, play pretend like when thing's wrong. But

0:39:11.719 --> 0:39:15.239
<v Speaker 1>I'm really I feel so relieved. Yeah, it feels really good.

0:39:15.280 --> 0:39:18.120
<v Speaker 1>It feels like the start of a new a new year.

0:39:19.320 --> 0:39:20.360
<v Speaker 1>If you got to get help.

0:39:21.080 --> 0:39:25.520
<v Speaker 2>Some other people feel good and take some questions.

0:39:25.719 --> 0:39:27.200
<v Speaker 1>Okay, fine, I was just about to tell you to

0:39:27.200 --> 0:39:27.920
<v Speaker 1>get your vaccine.

0:39:28.000 --> 0:39:29.320
<v Speaker 3>I know, I am going to get my vaccine.

0:39:29.320 --> 0:39:32.120
<v Speaker 2>You're like, no, I am, because I will tell y'all

0:39:32.160 --> 0:39:34.359
<v Speaker 2>like I'm started back with IVF and I just called

0:39:34.360 --> 0:39:36.000
<v Speaker 2>my doctor and I was like, should I get it before?

0:39:36.080 --> 0:39:39.439
<v Speaker 3>She's like, yes, girl, So I oh I do. Yeah.

0:39:39.760 --> 0:39:41.680
<v Speaker 3>So I'm going to get it in the next couple

0:39:41.680 --> 0:39:42.120
<v Speaker 3>of weeks.

0:39:42.160 --> 0:39:44.440
<v Speaker 2>Because how long do you have to wait between many.

0:39:45.640 --> 0:39:48.600
<v Speaker 1>Like a few weeks. I got mine April fifth, and

0:39:48.680 --> 0:39:51.400
<v Speaker 1>today is April twenty four.

0:39:52.080 --> 0:39:53.800
<v Speaker 2>Nobody's there like a minimum amount of time that you

0:39:53.840 --> 0:39:54.400
<v Speaker 2>wait between vas.

0:39:54.600 --> 0:39:56.560
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it's three weeks. I think twenty one days or

0:39:56.600 --> 0:39:57.279
<v Speaker 1>something like that.

0:39:57.400 --> 0:39:57.480
<v Speaker 2>Oh.

0:39:57.680 --> 0:40:01.080
<v Speaker 3>Then I got to hurry up because okay, yeah, so if.

0:40:00.960 --> 0:40:03.719
<v Speaker 1>You're if you're planning like a vacation or something, you

0:40:03.800 --> 0:40:05.319
<v Speaker 1>definitely want to be in the same place for at

0:40:05.360 --> 0:40:06.200
<v Speaker 1>least a few weeks.

0:40:06.719 --> 0:40:10.920
<v Speaker 2>There's something ye yes, no, because I like with like

0:40:11.000 --> 0:40:13.080
<v Speaker 2>it like with like I'm going to cycle right now,

0:40:13.120 --> 0:40:16.520
<v Speaker 2>and like tentatively speaking, there might be implantation like like

0:40:16.719 --> 0:40:19.120
<v Speaker 2>June sixth, So I'm like, I need to get on

0:40:19.160 --> 0:40:21.240
<v Speaker 2>it now because I want to have the vaccine.

0:40:20.840 --> 0:40:23.600
<v Speaker 1>Before, you know, before that all goes down.

0:40:23.760 --> 0:40:25.880
<v Speaker 2>Yes, hm, because I don't you know, I won't be

0:40:25.920 --> 0:40:28.759
<v Speaker 2>able to Okay, well, good to know. So I'm like, okay,

0:40:28.800 --> 0:40:30.680
<v Speaker 2>I'm gonna I'm gonna call tomorrow.

0:40:30.840 --> 0:40:32.480
<v Speaker 3>There's a bunch of places in Newark. I think they

0:40:32.520 --> 0:40:33.399
<v Speaker 3>even just like have you.

0:40:33.400 --> 0:40:33.960
<v Speaker 4>Just go.

0:40:35.440 --> 0:40:38.040
<v Speaker 1>Like it's really easy to get an appointment now, Yes,

0:40:38.200 --> 0:40:39.600
<v Speaker 1>that's what I've heard from different body.

0:40:40.160 --> 0:40:42.719
<v Speaker 2>Oh gosh, I'm gonna get my first backs latest next

0:40:42.719 --> 0:40:44.600
<v Speaker 2>week because Cis needs to make sure we can put

0:40:44.600 --> 0:40:46.759
<v Speaker 2>this baby ready.

0:40:47.600 --> 0:40:50.359
<v Speaker 1>Okay, but we will get to some questions though. Let's

0:40:50.360 --> 0:41:21.359
<v Speaker 1>take a quick break and be right back with your questions.

0:41:26.480 --> 0:41:28.960
<v Speaker 1>All right, y'all, we are back. Before we get into questions,

0:41:29.120 --> 0:41:32.160
<v Speaker 1>let me just do a quick promo for an event

0:41:32.200 --> 0:41:36.440
<v Speaker 1>that's happening. So this podcast is publishing Wednesday morning, So Thursday,

0:41:36.600 --> 0:41:38.719
<v Speaker 1>we are doing an event with The Nineteenth, which is

0:41:38.760 --> 0:41:43.239
<v Speaker 1>an amazing nonprofit news organization run founded by and run

0:41:43.239 --> 0:41:47.920
<v Speaker 1>by brilliant minds. Brilliant women founded The Nineteenth and they

0:41:47.960 --> 0:41:52.000
<v Speaker 1>report on everything at the intersection of politics, race, the economy.

0:41:52.360 --> 0:41:55.480
<v Speaker 1>They go there and Tiffany and I are joining them

0:41:55.520 --> 0:41:58.160
<v Speaker 1>for a live event on Thursday at one pm I

0:41:58.200 --> 0:42:01.399
<v Speaker 1>believe Eastern time. Check out the link in our show

0:42:01.440 --> 0:42:04.280
<v Speaker 1>notes and register to get your spot at this event.

0:42:04.440 --> 0:42:07.440
<v Speaker 1>We're talking about how you can be financially resilient in

0:42:07.480 --> 0:42:10.479
<v Speaker 1>the face of this pandemic, so definitely check us out

0:42:10.480 --> 0:42:13.320
<v Speaker 1>in support. Let's show them that BA Fam is always

0:42:13.320 --> 0:42:15.440
<v Speaker 1>there to support. Okay, even though you'll hear from us

0:42:15.440 --> 0:42:18.680
<v Speaker 1>every week, it'd be great to show the Nineteenth that

0:42:19.080 --> 0:42:21.880
<v Speaker 1>OURBA Fam shows up for us. So hit up the

0:42:22.000 --> 0:42:25.919
<v Speaker 1>show notes and register and we'll see you all there.

0:42:26.160 --> 0:42:26.799
<v Speaker 3>Plus it's free.

0:42:26.800 --> 0:42:32.319
<v Speaker 1>Did you mention that free ninety nine? Okay, So let's

0:42:32.320 --> 0:42:34.440
<v Speaker 1>get into the questions right now. We have hit up

0:42:34.480 --> 0:42:37.560
<v Speaker 1>our Instagram again, y'all can reach us on ig We

0:42:37.600 --> 0:42:40.240
<v Speaker 1>are at Brown Ambition Podcast. Just shoot us a DM

0:42:40.320 --> 0:42:42.799
<v Speaker 1>with your question or hit us up via email Brown

0:42:42.840 --> 0:42:47.160
<v Speaker 1>Ambition Podcast at gmail dot com, and also call call

0:42:47.280 --> 0:42:50.040
<v Speaker 1>us and leave a voicemail if you'd like. Our number

0:42:50.160 --> 0:42:52.040
<v Speaker 1>where you can call. Our text is in our show notes,

0:42:52.080 --> 0:42:55.880
<v Speaker 1>so check it out there. Alrighty. First question, Hey ladies,

0:42:55.960 --> 0:42:58.000
<v Speaker 1>I just started listening to your podcast and I love

0:42:58.040 --> 0:43:00.480
<v Speaker 1>all the content. Thank you. I want to submit a

0:43:00.560 --> 0:43:02.840
<v Speaker 1>question and hope of getting your input. My fiance and

0:43:02.880 --> 0:43:05.880
<v Speaker 1>I have paid off over sixty thousand dollars of debt

0:43:05.960 --> 0:43:09.720
<v Speaker 1>and have forty thousand dollars left. That's about thirteen thousand,

0:43:09.880 --> 0:43:13.080
<v Speaker 1>seven hundred dollars of student loans and thirty thousand dollars

0:43:13.080 --> 0:43:15.320
<v Speaker 1>that we have for a truck loan. We want to

0:43:15.320 --> 0:43:17.120
<v Speaker 1>buy a house in about a year, but we haven't

0:43:17.120 --> 0:43:19.640
<v Speaker 1>started the saving process since we've been so focused on

0:43:19.680 --> 0:43:22.480
<v Speaker 1>paying off debt. Do y'all think we should continue to

0:43:22.520 --> 0:43:25.520
<v Speaker 1>get our debt total down before saving or just go

0:43:25.800 --> 0:43:31.600
<v Speaker 1>full on into saving mode? So that's first of all, amazing,

0:43:31.960 --> 0:43:36.319
<v Speaker 1>sixty thousand dollars of debt down doesn't mention having any

0:43:36.360 --> 0:43:39.759
<v Speaker 1>savings at all, so we don't know if there's like

0:43:39.800 --> 0:43:42.000
<v Speaker 1>if they're building on top of a cash cushion. But

0:43:42.719 --> 0:43:45.200
<v Speaker 1>we can make some assumptions, like let's assume they don't

0:43:45.239 --> 0:43:49.200
<v Speaker 1>have anything saved and are wanting to start from scratch,

0:43:49.200 --> 0:43:52.120
<v Speaker 1>saving from a house. But they have two types of

0:43:52.160 --> 0:43:56.160
<v Speaker 1>debt left thirteen K student loans and thirty k for

0:43:56.239 --> 0:43:59.960
<v Speaker 1>a truck loan with an undisclosed APR.

0:44:00.080 --> 0:44:02.960
<v Speaker 3>Gonna say, what's the interest rate? I'm assuming the student loans.

0:44:03.040 --> 0:44:05.160
<v Speaker 2>Let's make the assumption that your student loans are federal,

0:44:05.239 --> 0:44:07.760
<v Speaker 2>so the interest rate is, like, you know.

0:44:08.120 --> 0:44:11.680
<v Speaker 1>Relatively now until September, you don't have to pay Yeah,

0:44:11.719 --> 0:44:13.480
<v Speaker 1>you don't have to pay student loans. You don't have

0:44:13.520 --> 0:44:16.120
<v Speaker 1>to pay federal student loans or an interest stopped has

0:44:16.160 --> 0:44:19.960
<v Speaker 1>stopped accruing thanks to the Cares Act through the end

0:44:20.000 --> 0:44:22.839
<v Speaker 1>of September, so really no one has to pay loans.

0:44:22.960 --> 0:44:24.960
<v Speaker 1>Let's yeah, we pretend that those are gone. Then it's

0:44:25.000 --> 0:44:27.439
<v Speaker 1>the thirty k for a truck loan.

0:44:28.160 --> 0:44:29.640
<v Speaker 2>And I don't know, you know, you know how it

0:44:29.719 --> 0:44:32.000
<v Speaker 2>is with trucks, I mean, with them car loans. It

0:44:32.000 --> 0:44:35.080
<v Speaker 2>could go either way. She could be double digits, she

0:44:35.120 --> 0:44:36.120
<v Speaker 2>could be three percent.

0:44:37.560 --> 0:44:40.760
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, sod, no, you got.

0:44:41.440 --> 0:44:42.000
<v Speaker 3>Here's the thing.

0:44:42.120 --> 0:44:46.040
<v Speaker 2>My stance on debt versus savings. It's never debt versus savings.

0:44:46.040 --> 0:44:47.520
<v Speaker 2>I feel like me and manny Al was like debt

0:44:47.560 --> 0:44:53.200
<v Speaker 2>and savings, you know, because saving especially because it doesn't

0:44:53.200 --> 0:44:54.920
<v Speaker 2>I mean, we don't know what the APR for the

0:44:55.000 --> 0:44:58.440
<v Speaker 2>for the truck loaners APR your annual percentage, your annual

0:44:59.360 --> 0:45:01.520
<v Speaker 2>percentage right sentence read.

0:45:01.640 --> 0:45:05.279
<v Speaker 3>Look, I'm like, this are basically the interest rate that

0:45:05.280 --> 0:45:07.200
<v Speaker 3>you're paying on that truck.

0:45:07.880 --> 0:45:10.239
<v Speaker 2>My assumption is because you don't have a credit card debt,

0:45:10.239 --> 0:45:14.600
<v Speaker 2>which is great, So I'm assuming you don't have crazy

0:45:14.640 --> 0:45:18.520
<v Speaker 2>interest rates. And even if you did, saving, to me

0:45:18.880 --> 0:45:22.279
<v Speaker 2>is your first line of defense. It's like the lock

0:45:22.360 --> 0:45:24.719
<v Speaker 2>on the door, you know, on the screen door at

0:45:24.719 --> 0:45:26.879
<v Speaker 2>that so someone has to bust through the screen door,

0:45:27.000 --> 0:45:28.680
<v Speaker 2>then get to the regular door, then get to the

0:45:28.760 --> 0:45:31.600
<v Speaker 2>chain lock, you know what I mean. And so I

0:45:31.800 --> 0:45:36.120
<v Speaker 2>really I'm a big proponent of having some savings and

0:45:36.239 --> 0:45:41.080
<v Speaker 2>not sacrifice savings just for to get towards that freedom

0:45:41.200 --> 0:45:44.600
<v Speaker 2>that it can happen and should happen at the same time. Now,

0:45:44.640 --> 0:45:48.640
<v Speaker 2>if you're saying that you're wanting to save for paying

0:45:48.680 --> 0:45:51.280
<v Speaker 2>down a house to buy a house, now that's different

0:45:51.640 --> 0:45:55.640
<v Speaker 2>because they're saving for like, you know, like emergencies and

0:45:55.760 --> 0:45:57.280
<v Speaker 2>saving for goal.

0:45:57.480 --> 0:45:58.640
<v Speaker 3>Because here's my worry.

0:45:58.760 --> 0:46:00.879
<v Speaker 2>Let's just say you're like, oh, hey, I'm gonna save

0:46:01.400 --> 0:46:03.759
<v Speaker 2>as we pay down our loan, and then we also

0:46:03.800 --> 0:46:05.920
<v Speaker 2>save for a house and you're able to get a

0:46:05.960 --> 0:46:08.000
<v Speaker 2>you know, a decent loan for the house. So then

0:46:08.040 --> 0:46:11.239
<v Speaker 2>you use your your savings to buy the house. So

0:46:11.280 --> 0:46:13.400
<v Speaker 2>now you're back at no savings again. So that's a

0:46:13.440 --> 0:46:17.160
<v Speaker 2>concern that you should be like set the house to

0:46:17.200 --> 0:46:20.120
<v Speaker 2>the side for a moment. And if you are going

0:46:20.200 --> 0:46:22.080
<v Speaker 2>to save, I want you to concentrate that you're saving

0:46:22.120 --> 0:46:26.360
<v Speaker 2>for emergencies while also paying down your debt. Now anything,

0:46:26.480 --> 0:46:28.760
<v Speaker 2>you know, anything above and beyond that. You can also

0:46:28.880 --> 0:46:31.279
<v Speaker 2>save two for buying a house. But you shouldn't be

0:46:31.360 --> 0:46:33.440
<v Speaker 2>looking at the savings that you're setting aside just for

0:46:33.520 --> 0:46:37.120
<v Speaker 2>the house. You should also have an emergency fund stashed away,

0:46:37.360 --> 0:46:39.759
<v Speaker 2>especially if you get a house. I mean, Maddy and

0:46:39.840 --> 0:46:42.319
<v Speaker 2>I will tell you in a minute how things just

0:46:42.360 --> 0:46:43.480
<v Speaker 2>be going haywy are.

0:46:43.320 --> 0:46:46.279
<v Speaker 3>Like, wait, what do you mean the plumbing? Wait, what

0:46:46.320 --> 0:46:46.600
<v Speaker 3>do you mean?

0:46:46.719 --> 0:46:48.839
<v Speaker 1>Why did you say plumbing? Because that's that's always what

0:46:48.840 --> 0:46:50.919
<v Speaker 1>it is, and it's always before you have a bunch

0:46:50.960 --> 0:46:53.520
<v Speaker 1>of guests over the toilet overflows like it did for

0:46:53.600 --> 0:46:56.040
<v Speaker 1>us that fourth of July last year, the year before that,

0:46:56.280 --> 0:46:59.960
<v Speaker 1>five hundred dollars to get someone to unclog it emergency

0:47:00.040 --> 0:47:01.960
<v Speaker 1>on a holiday. Okay, sorry, go ahead.

0:47:01.840 --> 0:47:03.319
<v Speaker 2>No, no, go ahead, no, because you know what I mean. So,

0:47:03.400 --> 0:47:05.560
<v Speaker 2>like I think a lot of people forget that there

0:47:05.600 --> 0:47:08.600
<v Speaker 2>are levels to savings. It's not just savings to eventually

0:47:08.600 --> 0:47:10.360
<v Speaker 2>that's like almost like that kind of savings. To me,

0:47:10.400 --> 0:47:13.160
<v Speaker 2>I call it delayed spending. So you save, save, safe, save,

0:47:13.239 --> 0:47:14.919
<v Speaker 2>then you use it all for a thing. Well, you've

0:47:14.960 --> 0:47:17.200
<v Speaker 2>just delayed the spending. You also have to save for

0:47:17.280 --> 0:47:20.040
<v Speaker 2>savings sake, meaning save for This is my first line

0:47:20.040 --> 0:47:21.719
<v Speaker 2>of defense. This is a lock on the screen door

0:47:22.000 --> 0:47:24.600
<v Speaker 2>that someone has to get through before the next door

0:47:24.600 --> 0:47:26.719
<v Speaker 2>can be can be breached and the next thing can

0:47:26.760 --> 0:47:29.759
<v Speaker 2>be breached. Like not enough people have enough money set

0:47:29.760 --> 0:47:34.840
<v Speaker 2>aside for that. And if twenty twenties panting commercial Pandemonium

0:47:35.000 --> 0:47:39.160
<v Speaker 2>taught us nothing is the value of having like that

0:47:39.200 --> 0:47:41.760
<v Speaker 2>first line of defense lined up, No matter how little

0:47:41.760 --> 0:47:43.759
<v Speaker 2>that is, it can give you a little bit of room.

0:47:44.280 --> 0:47:47.640
<v Speaker 1>Panting Commercial that's the name one haven't heard. I was

0:47:47.680 --> 0:47:51.279
<v Speaker 1>gonna say that. You know, if you're not paying your

0:47:51.280 --> 0:47:54.280
<v Speaker 1>student loans anymore, you could divert that payment to savings.

0:47:55.600 --> 0:47:58.040
<v Speaker 1>You know, call it your emergency fund that you're building

0:47:58.120 --> 0:48:00.319
<v Speaker 1>up while you don't have to, while you don't have

0:48:00.320 --> 0:48:02.399
<v Speaker 1>the obligation of paying off your student loans. There's really

0:48:02.400 --> 0:48:05.560
<v Speaker 1>no incentive right now to make payments on federal student loans.

0:48:05.760 --> 0:48:08.640
<v Speaker 1>You're not saving any money on interest because there is none,

0:48:08.920 --> 0:48:11.319
<v Speaker 1>and you don't have to like there's no there's no

0:48:12.400 --> 0:48:14.319
<v Speaker 1>there's actually a cons to paying them. And the con

0:48:14.440 --> 0:48:16.960
<v Speaker 1>is that you know, you could potentially be earning more

0:48:17.040 --> 0:48:19.080
<v Speaker 1>by putting your money elsewhere. Even if it's in a

0:48:19.760 --> 0:48:23.040
<v Speaker 1>really you know, a regular savings account that has very

0:48:23.040 --> 0:48:26.719
<v Speaker 1>little interest, it's still more than zero. And also it's

0:48:26.719 --> 0:48:29.040
<v Speaker 1>giving you that added protection. So if you're going to

0:48:29.080 --> 0:48:31.319
<v Speaker 1>be putting money toward loans that you don't have to,

0:48:31.400 --> 0:48:33.600
<v Speaker 1>that you're not paying interest on and not putting it

0:48:33.600 --> 0:48:36.719
<v Speaker 1>towards savings, that could potentially save you if you, you know,

0:48:36.880 --> 0:48:40.160
<v Speaker 1>have a financial challenge that pops up, it's just smarter

0:48:40.280 --> 0:48:43.200
<v Speaker 1>to put it away in savings. It's going to protect you.

0:48:43.360 --> 0:48:45.840
<v Speaker 1>So you could do that, just divert what you would

0:48:45.840 --> 0:48:48.640
<v Speaker 1>have been paying towards your student loans to savings. And

0:48:48.680 --> 0:48:50.600
<v Speaker 1>I would also point out, you know, if you're thinking

0:48:50.640 --> 0:48:52.920
<v Speaker 1>about taking out a mortgage for your future home and

0:48:52.960 --> 0:48:55.600
<v Speaker 1>you're talking about saving just for the down payment, they're

0:48:55.640 --> 0:48:57.320
<v Speaker 1>not going to want to see that this down payment's

0:48:57.320 --> 0:49:00.160
<v Speaker 1>going to bankrupt you. And they're also going to give

0:49:00.160 --> 0:49:02.680
<v Speaker 1>you a better rate if you have lower debt to

0:49:02.760 --> 0:49:05.160
<v Speaker 1>income ratio, which is, you know, how much your monthly

0:49:05.200 --> 0:49:09.680
<v Speaker 1>debt payments are versus your monthly expenses. So it behooves you,

0:49:11.040 --> 0:49:15.120
<v Speaker 1>sat word, it behooves you to try to pay, you know,

0:49:15.280 --> 0:49:18.480
<v Speaker 1>down some debt. And also we have some cash left behind,

0:49:18.840 --> 0:49:22.400
<v Speaker 1>liquid cash, so that lenders are willing to, you know,

0:49:22.719 --> 0:49:26.000
<v Speaker 1>let you borrow money at all, or even at a

0:49:26.040 --> 0:49:30.680
<v Speaker 1>more affordable rate than others. Something to consider. But it's

0:49:30.680 --> 0:49:34.799
<v Speaker 1>definitely attainable to buy a house, and it sounds like

0:49:34.800 --> 0:49:36.799
<v Speaker 1>you guys are really good at budgeting. I would just say,

0:49:37.320 --> 0:49:40.520
<v Speaker 1>less money throwing it away at debt, and more towards

0:49:40.520 --> 0:49:46.120
<v Speaker 1>that savings fund. Okay, how about this one. We've been

0:49:46.120 --> 0:49:48.640
<v Speaker 1>getting more and more questions about financial advisors, but this

0:49:48.880 --> 0:49:52.239
<v Speaker 1>listener says, do you have any recommendations for financial advisors.

0:49:52.360 --> 0:49:55.359
<v Speaker 1>I started with d R. If you don't know who

0:49:55.360 --> 0:49:58.239
<v Speaker 1>that is, then well whatever, you don't need to know,

0:49:58.280 --> 0:50:01.640
<v Speaker 1>forget about it. For if I financial education but realized

0:50:01.680 --> 0:50:04.680
<v Speaker 1>it helps, but I'm looking for something better. I'm currently

0:50:04.719 --> 0:50:08.640
<v Speaker 1>working with a quote smart vestor pro quote, which is

0:50:08.680 --> 0:50:13.839
<v Speaker 1>basically an advisor that follows DR's principles. Any advice or

0:50:13.880 --> 0:50:16.560
<v Speaker 1>info smart vestor pro.

0:50:16.440 --> 0:50:20.080
<v Speaker 2>Okay, So I think we both liked did where'd you

0:50:20.120 --> 0:50:21.080
<v Speaker 2>find Helen? Did you find here?

0:50:21.120 --> 0:50:22.120
<v Speaker 3>The XY Planning network?

0:50:22.160 --> 0:50:24.040
<v Speaker 1>Is that where you found oh Helen? Yeah, that was

0:50:24.160 --> 0:50:27.240
<v Speaker 1>years ago. I feel like XY Planning is still around.

0:50:27.280 --> 0:50:30.280
<v Speaker 1>At the time, it was very focused on literally generation

0:50:30.600 --> 0:50:34.960
<v Speaker 1>X and Y, and it's a network of fee based

0:50:35.040 --> 0:50:36.920
<v Speaker 1>or it was at the time. Yeah, I'm looking at

0:50:36.920 --> 0:50:42.040
<v Speaker 1>the Yeah. So all the advisors on their network are fiduciaries,

0:50:42.120 --> 0:50:44.000
<v Speaker 1>which means they have to work at your best interest,

0:50:44.520 --> 0:50:49.040
<v Speaker 1>offer virtual services, no commissions. They're not focusing on selling

0:50:49.080 --> 0:50:54.120
<v Speaker 1>you products like insurance. They have a CFP license. So yeah,

0:50:54.200 --> 0:50:56.920
<v Speaker 1>it's still around, and that's where I found Helen. But

0:50:56.960 --> 0:50:59.799
<v Speaker 1>I actually interviewed I think three My husband and I

0:51:00.040 --> 0:51:03.720
<v Speaker 1>reviewed three different people, and we settled on Helen after

0:51:03.800 --> 0:51:06.560
<v Speaker 1>doing those interviews. But yep, thanks Ye Planning.

0:51:06.640 --> 0:51:10.520
<v Speaker 2>And there's also one called the National Association of Personal

0:51:10.560 --> 0:51:16.200
<v Speaker 2>Financial Advisors. It's like NAPFA. And then there's also this

0:51:16.280 --> 0:51:19.520
<v Speaker 2>fee only network. So if you go this is a

0:51:19.520 --> 0:51:21.080
<v Speaker 2>slight book plug but not really. But if you go

0:51:21.160 --> 0:51:22.879
<v Speaker 2>to a gigao money dot com, there's this a little

0:51:22.880 --> 0:51:27.480
<v Speaker 2>button that says GGWM toolkit. So because inside like chapter ten,

0:51:27.560 --> 0:51:29.360
<v Speaker 2>I talk about picking your money team and how I

0:51:29.400 --> 0:51:33.360
<v Speaker 2>found my financial advisor, So definitely go to xy Planning Network.

0:51:33.360 --> 0:51:37.200
<v Speaker 2>I put that link there the National Association of Personal

0:51:37.280 --> 0:51:40.160
<v Speaker 2>Financial Advisors, and there's also the Fee Only Network, but

0:51:40.800 --> 0:51:42.120
<v Speaker 2>that's not why I want you to go there, because

0:51:42.120 --> 0:51:43.799
<v Speaker 2>you could just go to those websites. I want you

0:51:43.840 --> 0:51:46.799
<v Speaker 2>to go there to click that button because I created

0:51:46.800 --> 0:51:50.160
<v Speaker 2>this work she called the my soul called financial life template,

0:51:50.920 --> 0:51:54.200
<v Speaker 2>and I use the template to create like so how

0:51:54.239 --> 0:51:57.640
<v Speaker 2>I find my financial advisor? Angelin is. I created kind

0:51:57.680 --> 0:52:00.560
<v Speaker 2>of like this template of like my myself, my husband,

0:52:00.600 --> 0:52:03.560
<v Speaker 2>like what our financial life looked like because I found

0:52:03.560 --> 0:52:05.520
<v Speaker 2>myself when I was interviewing people forgetting like oh I

0:52:05.560 --> 0:52:06.920
<v Speaker 2>forgot to tell them this, and I forgot to tell

0:52:06.960 --> 0:52:09.560
<v Speaker 2>them that. But then once I created this kind of

0:52:09.600 --> 0:52:12.440
<v Speaker 2>template for myself. I was able to email it to

0:52:12.480 --> 0:52:14.239
<v Speaker 2>them before we had our talk, so I would not

0:52:14.320 --> 0:52:16.560
<v Speaker 2>forget to say like, oh, by the way, these are

0:52:16.560 --> 0:52:19.520
<v Speaker 2>our goals, this is how much we have saved. It's

0:52:19.600 --> 0:52:24.400
<v Speaker 2>just it was just like such a great like resource.

0:52:25.400 --> 0:52:29.319
<v Speaker 2>So yes, go ahead, And meanwhile, I'm clicking it now

0:52:29.400 --> 0:52:30.920
<v Speaker 2>and I'm like, is it not going Let me just

0:52:30.960 --> 0:52:32.719
<v Speaker 2>tell they no, But.

0:52:32.800 --> 0:52:36.279
<v Speaker 1>That's like a good challenge that you cannot overcome to know.

0:52:36.680 --> 0:52:39.640
<v Speaker 3>But no, but I think that that is Yeah.

0:52:39.680 --> 0:52:42.600
<v Speaker 2>I just I think that it's really it's important to

0:52:42.719 --> 0:52:45.920
<v Speaker 2>have some sort of like I don't know, like I

0:52:45.960 --> 0:52:47.520
<v Speaker 2>wanted to have something in front of me so as

0:52:47.560 --> 0:52:50.040
<v Speaker 2>I interviewed them, they could see one.

0:52:50.520 --> 0:52:51.879
<v Speaker 3>Because it was like twenty.

0:52:51.600 --> 0:52:53.839
<v Speaker 2>People that I reached out to and I gave them

0:52:53.920 --> 0:52:56.520
<v Speaker 2>kind of like that document so they could disqualify themselves

0:52:56.520 --> 0:52:58.279
<v Speaker 2>if I wasn't going to be a fit. And then

0:52:58.320 --> 0:53:00.120
<v Speaker 2>other like twenty people I sent it to, like I

0:53:00.120 --> 0:53:02.359
<v Speaker 2>think like maybe like twelve, we're like, oh yes, And

0:53:02.400 --> 0:53:05.319
<v Speaker 2>then I ended up whittling it down to Angeli. But

0:53:05.560 --> 0:53:07.440
<v Speaker 2>she had so much of the information that she that

0:53:07.520 --> 0:53:09.520
<v Speaker 2>she normally would ask was in that doc and it

0:53:09.600 --> 0:53:12.359
<v Speaker 2>just was so helpful so I suggest that that, yes,

0:53:12.480 --> 0:53:15.480
<v Speaker 2>my soul called financial life it is. It was such

0:53:15.480 --> 0:53:17.320
<v Speaker 2>a like like I said that Doc really.

0:53:17.160 --> 0:53:17.880
<v Speaker 3>Just was everything.

0:53:18.040 --> 0:53:20.680
<v Speaker 1>So check that out. We'll put that link in our

0:53:20.760 --> 0:53:25.399
<v Speaker 1>show notes. Cool. All right, well, thank y'all so much

0:53:25.520 --> 0:53:29.400
<v Speaker 1>for your questions. Hit us up Brandnambission Podcast at gmail

0:53:29.400 --> 0:53:32.239
<v Speaker 1>dot com and you can find us all up in

0:53:32.280 --> 0:53:35.480
<v Speaker 1>the socials, but especially on Instagram these days. Brand Ambisson

0:53:35.480 --> 0:53:40.520
<v Speaker 1>Podcast on ig No.

0:53:40.719 --> 0:54:18.560
<v Speaker 4>But okay, and now it's time to boost break or

0:54:18.640 --> 0:54:20.759
<v Speaker 4>boost a break or booze.

0:54:21.080 --> 0:54:23.920
<v Speaker 2>All right, let me look at my little blacumen to

0:54:24.080 --> 0:54:29.160
<v Speaker 2>see what do I have hair? So I wanted to

0:54:30.520 --> 0:54:33.680
<v Speaker 2>did we ever talk about Patriese colors and like the

0:54:33.680 --> 0:54:36.319
<v Speaker 2>trouble that she was having with them? No, we have not,

0:54:36.960 --> 0:54:39.839
<v Speaker 2>So I want to boost for Chese colors. Anyway, She's

0:54:39.880 --> 0:54:41.799
<v Speaker 2>one of the co founders of Black Lives Matter, and

0:54:41.880 --> 0:54:45.680
<v Speaker 2>unfortunately a lot of news outlets, including unfortunately black news outlets,

0:54:45.719 --> 0:54:49.360
<v Speaker 2>were dragging her for having the audacity to earn an income.

0:54:51.239 --> 0:54:52.440
<v Speaker 1>It was truly asine.

0:54:52.760 --> 0:54:55.880
<v Speaker 2>Yes, so I mean, and I mean I'm trying to

0:54:55.880 --> 0:54:59.640
<v Speaker 2>separate because I know Patrice and I have like I

0:54:59.640 --> 0:55:02.880
<v Speaker 2>remember or like a Black Lives Matters had been awarded

0:55:02.920 --> 0:55:06.600
<v Speaker 2>with the Sydney Peace Prize, which is super prestigious peace prize,

0:55:06.840 --> 0:55:09.839
<v Speaker 2>and I went to Australia and I went with her

0:55:09.880 --> 0:55:12.440
<v Speaker 2>to Australia when she was she was accepting it on

0:55:12.480 --> 0:55:14.879
<v Speaker 2>behalf of Black Lives Matter. And when I tell you

0:55:14.920 --> 0:55:17.120
<v Speaker 2>the I don't know that I know anybody that is

0:55:17.160 --> 0:55:22.319
<v Speaker 2>more passionate about black lives, you know than Patrice and

0:55:22.400 --> 0:55:24.360
<v Speaker 2>how she is dedicated literally her life and puts her

0:55:24.440 --> 0:55:27.680
<v Speaker 2>life on the line. Like the number of like death

0:55:27.760 --> 0:55:32.840
<v Speaker 2>threats and the number of just like it's crazy how

0:55:32.920 --> 0:55:35.960
<v Speaker 2>they come for that woman. And so people were mad

0:55:36.000 --> 0:55:39.760
<v Speaker 2>because they're like, what, you have a house in California. Meanwhile,

0:55:39.920 --> 0:55:43.000
<v Speaker 2>that's worth I don't remember what it was like, you know,

0:55:43.120 --> 0:55:45.200
<v Speaker 2>five hundred thousand dollars or one point two million dollars.

0:55:45.200 --> 0:55:47.319
<v Speaker 2>I don't think people understand if you don't live on

0:55:47.360 --> 0:55:52.239
<v Speaker 2>the coast, My little rinky dink house in Newark, New

0:55:52.320 --> 0:55:56.160
<v Speaker 2>Jersey is worth about four point fifty.

0:55:56.440 --> 0:55:57.440
<v Speaker 3>It's not something special.

0:55:57.480 --> 0:55:59.719
<v Speaker 2>I mean it's a nice que house, but meaning that

0:56:00.200 --> 0:56:03.719
<v Speaker 2>on the coast, what's one point two million dollars in

0:56:03.760 --> 0:56:05.759
<v Speaker 2>California looks like a regular house. Like I saw that

0:56:05.800 --> 0:56:07.479
<v Speaker 2>house I was like, this is what y'all mad at.

0:56:07.680 --> 0:56:11.680
<v Speaker 2>It's because of where, because of coastal living is.

0:56:11.680 --> 0:56:12.600
<v Speaker 3>Way more expensive.

0:56:13.080 --> 0:56:14.799
<v Speaker 2>You're like, do you understand, Like there are people in

0:56:14.840 --> 0:56:18.160
<v Speaker 2>New York who's literal, you know, one bedroom, two bedroom

0:56:18.239 --> 0:56:20.960
<v Speaker 2>apartment might be six thousand dollars and it doesn't look

0:56:20.960 --> 0:56:23.520
<v Speaker 2>like it looks like a college dorm room. Like, so

0:56:23.640 --> 0:56:26.520
<v Speaker 2>what is relatively expensive to like, you know, in the

0:56:26.560 --> 0:56:30.719
<v Speaker 2>Midwest is not expensive. I mean it is expensive, but

0:56:31.120 --> 0:56:33.000
<v Speaker 2>that you're just not going to get anything less than that,

0:56:33.400 --> 0:56:36.759
<v Speaker 2>especially in California. I mean New York, New Jersey's already bad,

0:56:36.760 --> 0:56:41.520
<v Speaker 2>but California is literally insane. And Patrese is an author.

0:56:41.600 --> 0:56:44.960
<v Speaker 2>Her book I remember when we were because I had

0:56:45.040 --> 0:56:47.280
<v Speaker 2>met her at Essence Fest at first, and I remember

0:56:47.360 --> 0:56:48.960
<v Speaker 2>she had just written a book, When They Call You

0:56:48.960 --> 0:56:51.879
<v Speaker 2>a Terrorist, a New York Times bestseller. It sold tons

0:56:51.880 --> 0:56:54.560
<v Speaker 2>of copies. I can tell you someone who got a

0:56:54.560 --> 0:56:56.280
<v Speaker 2>book deal. I promise you her book there was bigger

0:56:56.280 --> 0:56:58.840
<v Speaker 2>than mine, and mine was just under seven figures me

0:56:59.640 --> 0:57:02.280
<v Speaker 2>with my first like and so Patrice who was huge.

0:57:02.400 --> 0:57:04.120
<v Speaker 2>I mean, she's still huge, but at that time, so

0:57:04.160 --> 0:57:05.680
<v Speaker 2>I can only imagine what her book deal was.

0:57:05.680 --> 0:57:07.400
<v Speaker 3>So let's get that clear too.

0:57:07.960 --> 0:57:11.640
<v Speaker 2>Like Patrese is an artist, she has she's had all

0:57:11.680 --> 0:57:14.360
<v Speaker 2>of these other ways to bring an income for herself,

0:57:14.719 --> 0:57:17.880
<v Speaker 2>we cannot ask the people who serve us to also

0:57:18.000 --> 0:57:21.760
<v Speaker 2>be a martyr for brokeness. Like you already y'all already

0:57:21.800 --> 0:57:24.000
<v Speaker 2>know I'm not with it, Like I'm here to be

0:57:24.040 --> 0:57:26.920
<v Speaker 2>the budgetista to serve my community assists wants to be

0:57:26.960 --> 0:57:29.560
<v Speaker 2>wealthy as well, because like I don't.

0:57:29.600 --> 0:57:31.360
<v Speaker 3>I just like I'm done with that.

0:57:31.480 --> 0:57:33.280
<v Speaker 2>Like when I first started my business, I thought that

0:57:33.360 --> 0:57:34.720
<v Speaker 2>I'm like, well, I don't want to charge and I

0:57:34.760 --> 0:57:37.200
<v Speaker 2>don't want this because I ought not to have because

0:57:37.240 --> 0:57:40.080
<v Speaker 2>if I'm going to be of service, that's garbage. The

0:57:40.120 --> 0:57:43.120
<v Speaker 2>more that I have, I pour from my overflow, the

0:57:43.120 --> 0:57:45.600
<v Speaker 2>more resources that I have, the better I show up

0:57:45.640 --> 0:57:46.080
<v Speaker 2>for y'all.

0:57:46.240 --> 0:57:47.280
<v Speaker 3>Because I'm not broke.

0:57:47.480 --> 0:57:49.280
<v Speaker 2>Is why I'm able to do so much for free,

0:57:49.360 --> 0:57:52.040
<v Speaker 2>because I'm not worried about money, and so I just

0:57:52.120 --> 0:57:54.040
<v Speaker 2>wanted that to be It's almost like a boosty breaky

0:57:54.120 --> 0:57:57.160
<v Speaker 2>a boost for Patrese, but a break for y'all. Tried it,

0:57:57.280 --> 0:58:01.480
<v Speaker 2>not y'all, but y'all, that like asking our leaders to

0:58:01.640 --> 0:58:05.360
<v Speaker 2>suffer in brokeness and then you know some of these

0:58:05.560 --> 0:58:10.800
<v Speaker 2>very outlets putting her address online. I mean she already

0:58:10.880 --> 0:58:14.200
<v Speaker 2>was receiving death threats, putting her life in her family

0:58:14.840 --> 0:58:17.840
<v Speaker 2>at risk. I just when she has already put her

0:58:17.840 --> 0:58:21.000
<v Speaker 2>life on the line in response to Black Lives Matter

0:58:21.160 --> 0:58:24.280
<v Speaker 2>one like, so if you like, there's this great. His

0:58:24.400 --> 0:58:29.080
<v Speaker 2>name is Matt McGrory m A T T mc g

0:58:29.400 --> 0:58:32.000
<v Speaker 2>o O r Y on Instagram, and I love it

0:58:32.280 --> 0:58:37.080
<v Speaker 2>because he posted this letter a statement on false and

0:58:37.160 --> 0:58:41.880
<v Speaker 2>dangerous stories, right so, he he said. The following statement

0:58:41.920 --> 0:58:45.440
<v Speaker 2>is issued by Black Lives Matter Global the Foundation in

0:58:45.520 --> 0:58:50.680
<v Speaker 2>response to the false and defamatory thefamatory the famatory article

0:58:50.960 --> 0:58:55.800
<v Speaker 2>being amplified by right wing media. Patrise Culors is the

0:58:55.840 --> 0:58:59.000
<v Speaker 2>executive director of Black Lives Matter Global Network Foundation. She

0:58:59.120 --> 0:59:02.200
<v Speaker 2>serves in this role in a volunteer capacity. This is

0:59:02.240 --> 0:59:07.280
<v Speaker 2>from Global Black Lives Matter does not receive a salary

0:59:07.520 --> 0:59:11.680
<v Speaker 2>or benefits. Patrese has received a total of one hundred

0:59:11.720 --> 0:59:16.040
<v Speaker 2>and twenty thousand dollars since the organization's inception in twenty

0:59:16.120 --> 0:59:18.880
<v Speaker 2>thirteen is now twenty twenty one. He wrote this April twelve,

0:59:18.920 --> 0:59:21.200
<v Speaker 2>twenty twenty one. How many years is that, Mandy?

0:59:21.440 --> 0:59:26.080
<v Speaker 1>That is, when was it founded? Just twenty thirteen seven,

0:59:26.520 --> 0:59:28.080
<v Speaker 1>eight years, eight years.

0:59:28.080 --> 0:59:30.120
<v Speaker 2>So what is one hundred twenty thousand dollars divided by

0:59:30.120 --> 0:59:30.560
<v Speaker 2>eight years?

0:59:30.640 --> 0:59:31.440
<v Speaker 3>Let me let's do to that.

0:59:31.760 --> 0:59:34.680
<v Speaker 1>It's not very much. It's less than ten thousand dollars

0:59:34.760 --> 0:59:35.040
<v Speaker 1>a year.

0:59:35.120 --> 0:59:38.760
<v Speaker 2>I mean. And so if this says for duties such

0:59:38.760 --> 0:59:42.320
<v Speaker 2>as serving as a spokesperson and engaging in political education work,

0:59:42.520 --> 0:59:47.520
<v Speaker 2>Patrese did not receive any compensation after twenty nineteen, stop

0:59:48.080 --> 0:59:50.960
<v Speaker 2>to be abundantly clear, it says as a register of

0:59:50.960 --> 0:59:54.680
<v Speaker 2>four oh one ced three that this organization cannot and

0:59:54.760 --> 0:59:58.480
<v Speaker 2>did not commit any organizational resources towards the purchase of

0:59:58.520 --> 1:00:03.120
<v Speaker 2>personal property by any employer volunteer. I mean, I just

1:00:03.440 --> 1:00:05.160
<v Speaker 2>And he goes on to say Patresa's work for black

1:00:05.160 --> 1:00:07.360
<v Speaker 2>people over the years has made her and others who

1:00:07.360 --> 1:00:09.920
<v Speaker 2>are aligned with the Fight for Black Liberation targets for

1:00:10.000 --> 1:00:13.400
<v Speaker 2>racist violence. So it's just really really because I can

1:00:13.440 --> 1:00:15.120
<v Speaker 2>see in her face because for terrees, honestly, if you

1:00:15.360 --> 1:00:20.200
<v Speaker 2>despite all the bs, she is funny and joyful and lighthearted,

1:00:20.720 --> 1:00:23.800
<v Speaker 2>I mean, she is silly. And to see her like

1:00:23.880 --> 1:00:26.280
<v Speaker 2>fighting for her life on insu like I've messaged her

1:00:26.280 --> 1:00:28.440
<v Speaker 2>several times and just make sure she's okay, but to

1:00:28.520 --> 1:00:31.200
<v Speaker 2>see I can see the fear in her face, and

1:00:31.240 --> 1:00:33.200
<v Speaker 2>I see a little bit of the light dim because

1:00:33.720 --> 1:00:36.360
<v Speaker 2>she's expecting us from the right wing, but from her

1:00:36.360 --> 1:00:39.680
<v Speaker 2>own people coming for her. It's unconscionable and I just

1:00:39.680 --> 1:00:41.960
<v Speaker 2>can't imagine putting my life on the line for the

1:00:42.120 --> 1:00:46.040
<v Speaker 2>very folks who are now putting my life in danger

1:00:46.480 --> 1:00:49.360
<v Speaker 2>because of lies. And so I just wanted to give

1:00:49.400 --> 1:00:51.080
<v Speaker 2>her an extra If you want to read it for yourself,

1:00:51.080 --> 1:00:53.880
<v Speaker 2>I encourage you to do so. Matt m at t

1:00:54.200 --> 1:00:57.520
<v Speaker 2>mc g O r R Y on his Insta It

1:00:57.600 --> 1:00:59.720
<v Speaker 2>was posted on like I think, like I don't know,

1:01:00.360 --> 1:01:02.000
<v Speaker 2>like in April some time, but you can go and

1:01:02.040 --> 1:01:03.960
<v Speaker 2>read that letter. I think it's important for everybody to

1:01:04.040 --> 1:01:07.880
<v Speaker 2>see it, to read it. And yeah, she is just

1:01:07.960 --> 1:01:11.000
<v Speaker 2>an incredible woman who despite all of this still stands

1:01:11.000 --> 1:01:12.640
<v Speaker 2>in service to black people.

1:01:12.760 --> 1:01:15.720
<v Speaker 1>So this story, I mean, I texted you tip when

1:01:15.720 --> 1:01:18.720
<v Speaker 1>I saw it, I was like, what the absolute like

1:01:19.360 --> 1:01:20.280
<v Speaker 1>what it was?

1:01:20.400 --> 1:01:20.720
<v Speaker 4>It was.

1:01:21.720 --> 1:01:25.040
<v Speaker 1>I'm still so angry on her behalf, because there is

1:01:25.080 --> 1:01:27.760
<v Speaker 1>this expectation, especially if you're a black woman, that you're

1:01:27.760 --> 1:01:30.560
<v Speaker 1>not that you're supposed to give everything but not get anything.

1:01:31.000 --> 1:01:33.360
<v Speaker 1>That the image of you. They want to see is

1:01:33.400 --> 1:01:37.840
<v Speaker 1>someone who is on their knees crying because their son

1:01:38.000 --> 1:01:42.560
<v Speaker 1>or brother or husband or nephew was killed, or you know,

1:01:43.040 --> 1:01:46.400
<v Speaker 1>or with a handout, you know, looking for something they

1:01:46.400 --> 1:01:48.840
<v Speaker 1>don't want to see you succeed. And it is really

1:01:49.160 --> 1:01:52.200
<v Speaker 1>sad proof that there is still a lot of audience

1:01:52.200 --> 1:01:55.640
<v Speaker 1>out there who wants to proliferate this image of black women,

1:01:56.040 --> 1:02:00.720
<v Speaker 1>black people, you know, suffering but not thriving, and especially

1:02:00.720 --> 1:02:03.200
<v Speaker 1>for someone who's given so much. I was. I don't

1:02:03.200 --> 1:02:05.280
<v Speaker 1>even know Patrice, but I was offended on her behalf.

1:02:05.360 --> 1:02:07.520
<v Speaker 1>And so I'm glad you. I'm really glad you brought

1:02:07.520 --> 1:02:11.320
<v Speaker 1>this up. And as a former journalist, I will tell

1:02:11.360 --> 1:02:15.960
<v Speaker 1>you it was the It was the wackiest, thinnest piece

1:02:16.080 --> 1:02:20.000
<v Speaker 1>of internet crap I've like garbage. And as a as

1:02:20.040 --> 1:02:23.640
<v Speaker 1>a as anyone who even has a moticum of journalism

1:02:23.760 --> 1:02:26.120
<v Speaker 1>education would never have published that story. And I'm really

1:02:26.160 --> 1:02:29.960
<v Speaker 1>sad for a black journalists because you know, as any

1:02:29.960 --> 1:02:33.560
<v Speaker 1>black professional, when you're out there in the world, you're

1:02:33.640 --> 1:02:37.600
<v Speaker 1>you have such a razor thin margin margin for error.

1:02:38.160 --> 1:02:40.040
<v Speaker 1>So when one of us, as a black journalist, as

1:02:40.040 --> 1:02:43.000
<v Speaker 1>a black journalist out there posting filth like that and

1:02:43.120 --> 1:02:47.200
<v Speaker 1>nonsense with terrible sourcing or lack of sourcing and no

1:02:47.400 --> 1:02:50.280
<v Speaker 1>story at all, like even a tiny bit of fact

1:02:50.360 --> 1:02:52.000
<v Speaker 1>checking could have found there was no truth to this.

1:02:52.760 --> 1:02:55.560
<v Speaker 1>When you publish that, you you know you're making it

1:02:55.600 --> 1:02:57.880
<v Speaker 1>harder for other black journalists to be taken seriously. And

1:02:57.920 --> 1:03:00.000
<v Speaker 1>so that is what I'm offended by. She made me

1:03:00.120 --> 1:03:02.280
<v Speaker 1>want to like do a talk at the next National

1:03:02.280 --> 1:03:04.440
<v Speaker 1>Association and Black Journalist conference, like we got to do

1:03:04.520 --> 1:03:08.240
<v Speaker 1>better out here, and yeah, it was pure, pure garbage.

1:03:08.280 --> 1:03:11.720
<v Speaker 1>And I hope that a lot of people out there

1:03:12.240 --> 1:03:15.920
<v Speaker 1>are are smart enough to look at where stories like

1:03:15.960 --> 1:03:19.240
<v Speaker 1>that come from on the internet and question it and

1:03:19.240 --> 1:03:22.920
<v Speaker 1>and be critical and think critically about stories that we

1:03:22.960 --> 1:03:27.440
<v Speaker 1>hear about our leadership, because they they when you succeed

1:03:27.480 --> 1:03:29.600
<v Speaker 1>as a black woman, that's when they're most fearful of you,

1:03:29.720 --> 1:03:31.840
<v Speaker 1>and that is when they start putting out lies to

1:03:31.880 --> 1:03:34.600
<v Speaker 1>bring you down. And even though I don't know her,

1:03:34.680 --> 1:03:36.840
<v Speaker 1>I feel like that could be me. That could be

1:03:36.880 --> 1:03:38.920
<v Speaker 1>I'm sure it has been Tiffany. People don't want to

1:03:38.920 --> 1:03:41.600
<v Speaker 1>see Tiffany do well, you know they want they they like,

1:03:41.800 --> 1:03:44.240
<v Speaker 1>especially when it's your peers. I'm sure there's there's people

1:03:44.280 --> 1:03:46.880
<v Speaker 1>who who you know we're talking about earlier, would rather

1:03:46.960 --> 1:03:50.160
<v Speaker 1>see you struggle to make themselves feel better. And anyway,

1:03:50.440 --> 1:03:53.120
<v Speaker 1>I my heart goes out to Patrice. I hope she's okay.

1:03:54.360 --> 1:03:57.600
<v Speaker 1>She has done such good work, and go and get

1:03:57.640 --> 1:04:00.840
<v Speaker 1>your house's girl, get all the houses you every right

1:04:00.880 --> 1:04:02.840
<v Speaker 1>to get your house is how many billionaires? Like do

1:04:02.840 --> 1:04:05.520
<v Speaker 1>you want to talk about? How many billionaires give away

1:04:05.560 --> 1:04:10.200
<v Speaker 1>money to nonprofits and all their philanthropic good deeds and

1:04:10.240 --> 1:04:14.360
<v Speaker 1>then turn around and you know, drive gas guzzling cars

1:04:14.480 --> 1:04:18.040
<v Speaker 1>and have the audacity to go shopping for expensive things

1:04:18.080 --> 1:04:20.880
<v Speaker 1>and have watches and jets and stuff like. Get out

1:04:20.880 --> 1:04:23.560
<v Speaker 1>of here. Like it's just complete and utter nonsense. And

1:04:23.720 --> 1:04:26.160
<v Speaker 1>she did not deserve it for a minute. And I

1:04:26.200 --> 1:04:28.720
<v Speaker 1>hope that she I hope that the light has not

1:04:28.760 --> 1:04:32.200
<v Speaker 1>dimmed for too long because she has done so much

1:04:32.200 --> 1:04:34.920
<v Speaker 1>good work and she needs all the support that she deserves.

1:04:35.040 --> 1:04:38.040
<v Speaker 1>Right now, what was my booth going to be?

1:04:38.040 --> 1:04:38.200
<v Speaker 5>Oh?

1:04:38.200 --> 1:04:41.760
<v Speaker 1>I know, hold on my computer just died. I went

1:04:41.800 --> 1:04:44.520
<v Speaker 1>away well really quick, because that was I joined in

1:04:44.560 --> 1:04:47.000
<v Speaker 1>on that one. But I wanted to shout out things.

1:04:47.040 --> 1:04:49.960
<v Speaker 1>I wanted to shout out this young woman, and I

1:04:50.600 --> 1:04:52.720
<v Speaker 1>wanted to shout this out, Tiffany, because I can't stop

1:04:52.760 --> 1:04:55.640
<v Speaker 1>thinking about your nephew Roman and how he just has

1:04:55.680 --> 1:04:59.280
<v Speaker 1>this big kid genius energy, big like I mean, he

1:04:59.440 --> 1:05:01.760
<v Speaker 1>was just fascinating to watch. I could have just I

1:05:01.760 --> 1:05:03.320
<v Speaker 1>didn't want to be weird, but I was just like

1:05:03.400 --> 1:05:06.960
<v Speaker 1>really wanting to observe him. He's a mathematical genius. And

1:05:07.080 --> 1:05:09.320
<v Speaker 1>I saw this story about a young girl who's twelve

1:05:09.680 --> 1:05:12.680
<v Speaker 1>and how she's attending college this year. Her name's Elena Wicker,

1:05:13.240 --> 1:05:16.440
<v Speaker 1>and she's soon to be college student, and she wants

1:05:16.480 --> 1:05:19.800
<v Speaker 1>to be the youngest black woman to ever work for NASA,

1:05:20.400 --> 1:05:23.440
<v Speaker 1>and she was recently featured in People magazine, and I

1:05:23.480 --> 1:05:26.000
<v Speaker 1>just wanted to share this little, this little bit of

1:05:26.320 --> 1:05:30.200
<v Speaker 1>black excellence. And her mother, Diane mccordter, said one of

1:05:30.240 --> 1:05:32.680
<v Speaker 1>the signs that her child was gifted was she would

1:05:32.680 --> 1:05:36.880
<v Speaker 1>always organize legos by color and by size and very strategic,

1:05:37.240 --> 1:05:38.920
<v Speaker 1>and if you took one of her legos out of

1:05:38.960 --> 1:05:42.040
<v Speaker 1>the set, she knew one of them was missing. But

1:05:42.120 --> 1:05:46.040
<v Speaker 1>that she's still goofy and she's always you know, she's

1:05:46.080 --> 1:05:48.400
<v Speaker 1>had a sense of humor, but would like build these

1:05:48.480 --> 1:05:51.920
<v Speaker 1>crazy you know, like the millennium falcon out of legos

1:05:51.960 --> 1:05:55.120
<v Speaker 1>and like all these things. So shout out to Elena

1:05:55.360 --> 1:05:58.920
<v Speaker 1>and Black Girl Excellence, and also shout out to Roman

1:05:59.000 --> 1:06:02.000
<v Speaker 1>because I feel like he might be like people dot

1:06:02.040 --> 1:06:03.880
<v Speaker 1>com Black excellent story one day.

1:06:04.200 --> 1:06:07.160
<v Speaker 2>I always like I used to because you know, teaching

1:06:07.240 --> 1:06:09.200
<v Speaker 2>for so long, I used to always like the joke

1:06:09.320 --> 1:06:10.840
<v Speaker 2>was that ain't no regular baby. That's what I would

1:06:10.840 --> 1:06:12.640
<v Speaker 2>always say him like he was one and a half

1:06:12.720 --> 1:06:18.440
<v Speaker 2>talk about octagon oval. I'm like what I used to

1:06:18.440 --> 1:06:20.680
<v Speaker 2>tell her. I'm like, mm, sis, I ain't no regular baby,

1:06:20.680 --> 1:06:22.120
<v Speaker 2>because you know that was her first and she's like,

1:06:22.160 --> 1:06:24.040
<v Speaker 2>I don't know, don't want in a half year olds

1:06:24.240 --> 1:06:27.000
<v Speaker 2>name all the shapes. I'm like, no, and if they do,

1:06:27.080 --> 1:06:29.560
<v Speaker 2>they certainly don't know octagons from hexagons.

1:06:29.840 --> 1:06:30.440
<v Speaker 3>Sis.

1:06:30.920 --> 1:06:33.480
<v Speaker 2>No, And like even now, like you know, Roman is

1:06:33.520 --> 1:06:36.360
<v Speaker 2>telling time. I didn't not have to tell time until

1:06:36.400 --> 1:06:37.560
<v Speaker 2>I was like in fifth or sixth grade.

1:06:37.640 --> 1:06:41.439
<v Speaker 3>He's five. Yeah, he's telling time.

1:06:41.520 --> 1:06:45.360
<v Speaker 2>He's doing multiplication and addition reading like all these like

1:06:45.400 --> 1:06:47.120
<v Speaker 2>signs like we wu walk down the street. I was like,

1:06:47.520 --> 1:06:49.360
<v Speaker 2>I'm thinking, like he's gonna read the first two lines.

1:06:49.360 --> 1:06:51.800
<v Speaker 2>It was like no, it said something like it was

1:06:51.800 --> 1:06:54.240
<v Speaker 2>like a parking site. No, parking police. Try this boy,

1:06:54.560 --> 1:06:57.520
<v Speaker 2>no parking police towing. I'm like, cause he never heard

1:06:57.520 --> 1:06:59.000
<v Speaker 2>of towing. But he's like, I can sound it out

1:06:59.080 --> 1:06:59.600
<v Speaker 2>at five.

1:07:00.080 --> 1:07:01.400
<v Speaker 3>Oh yeah.

1:07:01.440 --> 1:07:04.000
<v Speaker 2>So I always tell her I adn't no regular baby

1:07:04.040 --> 1:07:07.040
<v Speaker 2>because she was worried. Because for you parents, if you

1:07:07.080 --> 1:07:11.920
<v Speaker 2>are not up on number blocks and alpha blocks on Netflix,

1:07:12.720 --> 1:07:15.680
<v Speaker 2>cis you late? It is as a teacher, I'm telling

1:07:15.680 --> 1:07:16.160
<v Speaker 2>you want.

1:07:16.040 --> 1:07:19.439
<v Speaker 1>To feel attacked because I'm still on Sesame Street again

1:07:19.960 --> 1:07:20.440
<v Speaker 1>one more time.

1:07:20.640 --> 1:07:23.400
<v Speaker 2>Number number of blocks and alpha blocks. So it is

1:07:23.840 --> 1:07:28.720
<v Speaker 2>they whoever made it. They are educational geniuses because what

1:07:28.760 --> 1:07:32.120
<v Speaker 2>this show is like so basically they have turned letters

1:07:32.720 --> 1:07:36.280
<v Speaker 2>and numbers into superheroes. You so kids feel like they're

1:07:36.320 --> 1:07:40.560
<v Speaker 2>watching one of these superhero shows, but really they are.

1:07:41.360 --> 1:07:43.840
<v Speaker 2>They are showing you how to count attract. So it

1:07:43.840 --> 1:07:46.480
<v Speaker 2>gets with every episode, it gets more complex. In the beginning,

1:07:46.520 --> 1:07:49.040
<v Speaker 2>you're just doing letters, and then sounds and then words

1:07:49.040 --> 1:07:52.280
<v Speaker 2>and then sentences. So each episode gets more and more complex.

1:07:52.400 --> 1:07:53.960
<v Speaker 2>But they do it in such a way that you

1:07:54.000 --> 1:07:56.960
<v Speaker 2>feel like you're watching like, you know, like Power Rangers,

1:07:57.000 --> 1:08:00.320
<v Speaker 2>because the actual numbers and the letters. So there's two

1:08:00.360 --> 1:08:02.800
<v Speaker 2>separate shows number blocks and then there's an Alpha blocks

1:08:03.040 --> 1:08:05.800
<v Speaker 2>that they they take on the persona of like different

1:08:06.360 --> 1:08:10.480
<v Speaker 2>like I said, superheroes, but it's so well done. And

1:08:10.520 --> 1:08:13.240
<v Speaker 2>the repetitiveness, I mean, I like, I'm I'm picking up

1:08:13.280 --> 1:08:16.160
<v Speaker 2>everything they're putting down. I'm like, ooh, like a million

1:08:16.240 --> 1:08:18.000
<v Speaker 2>when she was three, just like a few months ago.

1:08:18.439 --> 1:08:20.080
<v Speaker 2>Do you know how hard a concept it is for

1:08:20.120 --> 1:08:23.080
<v Speaker 2>a kid to understand zero? Like, think about that many

1:08:23.160 --> 1:08:24.960
<v Speaker 2>Like how do you explain zero to a two year

1:08:24.960 --> 1:08:25.840
<v Speaker 2>old or a three year old?

1:08:26.800 --> 1:08:29.040
<v Speaker 1>And so it's me straight they show you that cookie

1:08:29.120 --> 1:08:30.439
<v Speaker 1>has no cookies.

1:08:30.080 --> 1:08:32.200
<v Speaker 2>I can tell you, and that's so, but it's still

1:08:32.240 --> 1:08:34.760
<v Speaker 2>really harder of a concept because kids understand numbers. And

1:08:34.800 --> 1:08:36.320
<v Speaker 2>so the other day I was saying something and then

1:08:36.400 --> 1:08:38.320
<v Speaker 2>he was like, I'm sad there's zero.

1:08:38.479 --> 1:08:39.320
<v Speaker 3>There's zero left.

1:08:39.320 --> 1:08:41.040
<v Speaker 2>I looked at her, like my sister was like, girl,

1:08:41.600 --> 1:08:44.800
<v Speaker 2>damn alpha black, those damn number blocks. But I just

1:08:44.920 --> 1:08:47.760
<v Speaker 2>I share that that because it's been such a great

1:08:48.000 --> 1:08:50.240
<v Speaker 2>you know, in the world wherever I get it, Like

1:08:50.439 --> 1:08:52.200
<v Speaker 2>my sister used to be really big on like you know,

1:08:52.320 --> 1:08:55.000
<v Speaker 2>not too much screen time a girl pandemic. It was like,

1:08:55.040 --> 1:08:56.160
<v Speaker 2>where are your number blocks?

1:08:58.680 --> 1:08:58.960
<v Speaker 1>Yep?

1:08:59.320 --> 1:09:01.760
<v Speaker 5>Yes, So I was like, you know, tell her to

1:09:01.840 --> 1:09:05.120
<v Speaker 5>check out the guy on YouTube who excavates for a living,

1:09:05.320 --> 1:09:07.200
<v Speaker 5>which is where you just dig up dirt and move

1:09:07.200 --> 1:09:10.920
<v Speaker 5>it to other places hypnotizes my child send me.

1:09:10.880 --> 1:09:12.400
<v Speaker 3>A lake because I will.

1:09:12.920 --> 1:09:14.360
<v Speaker 1>I don't know who it is. I used to roll

1:09:14.400 --> 1:09:16.639
<v Speaker 1>my eyes, but I will walk in the living room

1:09:16.680 --> 1:09:19.760
<v Speaker 1>and my husband always watches this guy and he and

1:09:19.880 --> 1:09:22.800
<v Speaker 1>Rio are on the couch just dead staring watching the

1:09:22.800 --> 1:09:25.800
<v Speaker 1>sky dig up gravel and it goes a full hour.

1:09:26.160 --> 1:09:28.360
<v Speaker 1>My toddler did not move. I don't know if he's

1:09:28.400 --> 1:09:31.719
<v Speaker 1>learning anything, but he likes to. He screams at equipment

1:09:31.760 --> 1:09:33.040
<v Speaker 1>now when he sees it on the side.

1:09:32.840 --> 1:09:34.960
<v Speaker 3>Of the d but that means he's recognizing it.

1:09:35.360 --> 1:09:36.519
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, No.

1:09:36.600 --> 1:09:39.200
<v Speaker 2>I just think that, like, there's are some shows that

1:09:39.280 --> 1:09:41.280
<v Speaker 2>are so well done and that is number of blocks

1:09:41.320 --> 1:09:43.920
<v Speaker 2>and alpha blocks there. Like I started following them on

1:09:44.080 --> 1:09:46.240
<v Speaker 2>Insta just to be like, thank you so much all

1:09:46.280 --> 1:09:49.360
<v Speaker 2>that you've taught my niece and nephew. It's just great programming.

1:09:49.400 --> 1:09:52.599
<v Speaker 2>But no, who like.

1:09:52.840 --> 1:09:56.240
<v Speaker 1>It's protect that one. The force is strong with him.

1:09:56.520 --> 1:09:58.680
<v Speaker 2>I tell my sister, my girl, we will all be

1:09:58.720 --> 1:10:00.839
<v Speaker 2>working for his whatever company.

1:10:01.080 --> 1:10:03.920
<v Speaker 1>But Mimi keeps it spicy. She keeps it like you know,

1:10:04.840 --> 1:10:06.000
<v Speaker 1>She's like, dude.

1:10:05.960 --> 1:10:07.880
<v Speaker 2>That's what we call a millia mamie. She keeps it

1:10:07.920 --> 1:10:10.880
<v Speaker 2>allways spicy like girls. She feel like Roman, we're here

1:10:10.920 --> 1:10:12.920
<v Speaker 2>to have fun you and this. She does like Alpha

1:10:12.960 --> 1:10:16.519
<v Speaker 2>blocks too, but she definitely is the He's the Chucky

1:10:16.600 --> 1:10:21.760
<v Speaker 2>and she's the Tommy of a rug Rats, like you know, exploratory,

1:10:21.960 --> 1:10:24.879
<v Speaker 2>having a good time. And Roman's like, oh, I guess,

1:10:25.240 --> 1:10:27.360
<v Speaker 2>and like literally he'll build a thing and she will

1:10:27.400 --> 1:10:28.960
<v Speaker 2>just be like, I'm gonna tip it over, okay.

1:10:29.000 --> 1:10:29.920
<v Speaker 3>Roman, He's like dupe.

1:10:30.760 --> 1:10:36.040
<v Speaker 2>She's like, yeah, exactly, no, But I'm just I'm just honestly,

1:10:36.080 --> 1:10:39.120
<v Speaker 2>it was nice to have like you like here in

1:10:39.120 --> 1:10:41.479
<v Speaker 2>my space. I'm like, oh, just fit right in. It

1:10:41.560 --> 1:10:43.040
<v Speaker 2>was just like nice just to like hang out. I'm

1:10:43.080 --> 1:10:46.320
<v Speaker 2>like on the couch just talking like adults and having

1:10:46.320 --> 1:10:47.080
<v Speaker 2>a good time.

1:10:47.520 --> 1:10:52.360
<v Speaker 1>It was a very warm and beautiful homie. You know,

1:10:52.680 --> 1:10:55.519
<v Speaker 1>I loved it. I feel like, you know, it was

1:10:55.600 --> 1:11:00.240
<v Speaker 1>it filled my cup as they say, filled my cup up.

1:11:00.320 --> 1:11:02.760
<v Speaker 1>And I was really low that day. So thank you,

1:11:02.800 --> 1:11:05.680
<v Speaker 1>Thank you again, and to your sister Tracy and just Superman.

1:11:06.560 --> 1:11:09.160
<v Speaker 1>I hope his movie Theater in the Basement is coming

1:11:09.160 --> 1:11:12.880
<v Speaker 1>along well. Excited to hit him up at the twin

1:11:13.160 --> 1:11:15.799
<v Speaker 1>Is that what the speakeasy is called. Yeah, twins place,

1:11:16.160 --> 1:11:21.040
<v Speaker 1>Twins place, Okay, twins place the speak that's gonna be fun.

1:11:22.000 --> 1:11:24.439
<v Speaker 1>All right, Well, I hope we can do. I'm like,

1:11:24.439 --> 1:11:26.639
<v Speaker 1>what am I gonna see whatever? You guys will see

1:11:26.640 --> 1:11:28.040
<v Speaker 1>the pictures, So I guess I'll see you get in

1:11:28.080 --> 1:11:36.400
<v Speaker 1>six years, Tiffany update another time. All right, y'all, we'll

1:11:36.439 --> 1:11:38.600
<v Speaker 1>take care. Have a good week. Check us out on

1:11:38.680 --> 1:11:41.879
<v Speaker 1>Thursday with the nineteenth hit up our show notes to register,

1:11:42.120 --> 1:11:44.880
<v Speaker 1>It's free, so show up and show out for BA.

1:11:45.520 --> 1:11:45.720
<v Speaker 3>Yes,