WEBVTT - No. 22: 365 Days Later + Living With Intention + Normalizing Black Joy. 0:00:18.120 --> 0:00:25.320 Tell me I can't see Okay, what's up, y'all? Welcome 0:00:25.360 --> 0:00:28.160 to Hand Me my Purse the Podcast. I am me 0:00:28.320 --> 0:00:31.320 Me Walker, and I will be your forever host, each 0:00:31.360 --> 0:00:34.919 and every single time you tune into this podcast. So 0:00:35.040 --> 0:00:37.879 go ahead and get comfortable. Get yourself a glass of 0:00:37.920 --> 0:00:42.880 your favorite beverage, whether that's alkaline water, red kool Aid, 0:00:43.440 --> 0:00:46.920 a hot cup of tea with honey, a glass of Cabernet, 0:00:47.000 --> 0:00:52.000 Sauvignon or Hennessy, and light yourself a candle, some incense 0:00:52.080 --> 0:00:54.800 or burn some sage and just get ready to chill 0:00:54.880 --> 0:01:10.000 out and have a good time. What's up, friends and ken, 0:01:10.120 --> 0:01:13.759 It is none other than Mimi Resident Auntie Supreme here 0:01:13.800 --> 0:01:17.640 at Hammy My Purse the Podcast, and today I am 0:01:17.720 --> 0:01:22.319 sipping on a black totty. No, not a hot totty. 0:01:22.520 --> 0:01:24.360 It is a black totty. And this is brought to 0:01:24.400 --> 0:01:28.240 you by my favorite mixtress of adult beverages, the Guru 0:01:28.360 --> 0:01:32.959 herself of Fancy who creations the one and only Bedroom Bartender. 0:01:33.360 --> 0:01:36.639 And I'm sure you're wondering what is a black totty? Well, Gina, 0:01:36.920 --> 0:01:42.160 creator of the Bedroom Bartender, created this drink for me 0:01:43.040 --> 0:01:45.720 as a way to close out black history mind. She 0:01:46.000 --> 0:01:48.240 told me she was watching the new Billy Holiday film 0:01:48.280 --> 0:01:52.760 on Hulu, which is entitled The United States Versus Billy Holliday. 0:01:53.040 --> 0:01:56.600 The title alone has me intrigued, but she says she 0:01:56.640 --> 0:01:58.640 was watching that and it made her think about the 0:01:58.720 --> 0:02:00.880 things that singers have to do to prepare their voice 0:02:00.880 --> 0:02:04.480 for performance, and about Billy Holliday's pain and trauma, and 0:02:04.520 --> 0:02:06.800 that it made her think about celebrating the parts of 0:02:06.840 --> 0:02:09.679 our blackness that we sometimes don't like to embrace out 0:02:09.680 --> 0:02:14.000 loud and in public. And she said that Auntie Billy 0:02:14.040 --> 0:02:16.840 Holiday was definitely a dark liquor kind of woman, or 0:02:16.880 --> 0:02:19.880 that's what she gives off as darker liquors can sometimes 0:02:19.880 --> 0:02:24.120 be a healing bomb for vocals. So a black totty 0:02:24.200 --> 0:02:28.799 consists of black tea, ginger, honey, dark liquor like a bourbon, 0:02:28.840 --> 0:02:31.919 a conac or whiskey, and lemon. And so I will 0:02:31.960 --> 0:02:34.960 post a photo of the ingredients that Gina gave me 0:02:35.000 --> 0:02:39.360 to make this drink very very nice. Listen, a curated drink. 0:02:39.440 --> 0:02:42.760 It is a good situation. And I can't even lie 0:02:42.760 --> 0:02:45.960 to y'all. I have said before on this show that 0:02:46.000 --> 0:02:50.520 hot toddies are my jam this here. Black Totty is 0:02:50.560 --> 0:02:54.160 my new jam is so good, and sometimes I make 0:02:54.240 --> 0:02:57.519 hot Toddies and they are really strong and not as 0:02:57.600 --> 0:03:02.240 pleasant to drink. This is amazing. It is of course, 0:03:02.240 --> 0:03:05.600 it's hot, rich, but not too heavy. The ti use 0:03:05.720 --> 0:03:09.200 was a black chi Ta and this is the first 0:03:09.240 --> 0:03:11.720 time I've ever used one of those honey spoon things. 0:03:12.160 --> 0:03:14.640 I don't really know what they're called, because I'm not 0:03:14.680 --> 0:03:17.040 that fancy. I don't use those. But either way, the 0:03:17.120 --> 0:03:21.440 drink is amazing. It's hot. It is like opening up 0:03:21.480 --> 0:03:24.240 my chest, you know. It ain't nothing like a little 0:03:24.240 --> 0:03:27.760 brown liquor to open your chest up. The lemon makes 0:03:27.760 --> 0:03:31.720 it refreshing, so it's not, you know, like heavy, but 0:03:31.919 --> 0:03:37.520 it's it's rich and not rich as in heavy, but 0:03:37.640 --> 0:03:40.560 it's rich as it's rich in flavor. So make sure 0:03:40.560 --> 0:03:43.880 you check the show notes out so that you can 0:03:44.040 --> 0:03:47.320 go to the Bedroom Bartender's website and follow her on 0:03:47.480 --> 0:03:49.720 Instagram and see what she has cooking up over there. 0:03:50.040 --> 0:03:52.760 Because here at hand me my purse, we support black 0:03:52.800 --> 0:03:56.360 business and you should too. She has amazing hand poured 0:03:56.440 --> 0:03:59.720 soy candles. The scents are really unique, so it's not 0:03:59.800 --> 0:04:02.240 like all of the smells that you would smell at 0:04:02.320 --> 0:04:07.240 you know, TJ Max or even like your high end 0:04:07.280 --> 0:04:10.080 candles like Joe Malone. It's not going to be like that. 0:04:10.120 --> 0:04:12.880 Although Joe Malone candles are the bomb, but they are 0:04:12.920 --> 0:04:18.480 not created or fashioned after high end adult beverages. How 0:04:18.480 --> 0:04:21.400 about that they also are not created by a black woman. 0:04:21.800 --> 0:04:26.960 So then there is that she has self care kids 0:04:27.440 --> 0:04:29.680 that are awesome. Another thing I like about her candles 0:04:29.720 --> 0:04:32.480 is that they don't smell fake and like waxy, you know, 0:04:32.520 --> 0:04:35.000 because that can be an issue. But anyway, she has 0:04:35.040 --> 0:04:38.000 self care kids that include bath salts, candles, and special 0:04:38.040 --> 0:04:41.320 additions to help you create the adult beverage that is 0:04:41.360 --> 0:04:43.880 associated with the kid, like she has one for Hot Coco. 0:04:44.360 --> 0:04:48.640 You can listen to the episode episode number eighteen I believe, 0:04:49.560 --> 0:04:52.919 or it might be nineteen. No, it's the bonus episode 0:04:52.920 --> 0:04:55.840 for the holiday where she goes more into what she 0:04:55.920 --> 0:04:59.200 has on the website. But it's like the best of 0:04:59.240 --> 0:05:02.359 all the world, supreme self care. It's like me time 0:05:02.360 --> 0:05:05.000 on a thousand and She has also thrown a self 0:05:05.000 --> 0:05:07.080 care code because here at Him and My Purse, we 0:05:07.080 --> 0:05:09.760 don't call them promo codes, we call them self care codes. 0:05:10.040 --> 0:05:11.880 She threw them one for you guys, and this will 0:05:11.920 --> 0:05:15.240 only apply until the next episode comes out. So from 0:05:15.240 --> 0:05:18.280 March first today until the fifteenth of March, you can 0:05:18.360 --> 0:05:21.360 use the code Billy and that's b I L l 0:05:21.480 --> 0:05:24.800 I E and get free shipping on any order over 0:05:24.839 --> 0:05:28.400 fifty dollars. Go to the show notes check her out. 0:05:28.760 --> 0:05:38.280 Now let's get into the sham and get this party started. So, 0:05:38.480 --> 0:05:41.120 friends in Kim. For today's jam, I decided to go 0:05:41.360 --> 0:05:46.880 to one of our black geniuses, our creative geniuses. I 0:05:46.960 --> 0:05:49.760 went to Prince and I chose a song that is 0:05:50.000 --> 0:05:54.240 definitely one of his more obscure songs for people who 0:05:54.279 --> 0:05:58.400 are not like heavy Prince fans. I decided to go 0:05:58.720 --> 0:06:00.920 with a song that if you're not a heavy Prince 0:06:00.920 --> 0:06:02.880 Fee you probably wouldn't know unless you have a kid 0:06:02.920 --> 0:06:05.720 who watches Sesame Street and you happen to see him 0:06:05.720 --> 0:06:09.560 performing it on Sesame Street. That song is called Starfish 0:06:09.600 --> 0:06:15.000 and Coffee. It's an amazing song. And I tried my 0:06:15.080 --> 0:06:20.520 best guys to keep up the spirit of finding and 0:06:21.080 --> 0:06:25.400 sharing with you guys really good covers. But I hit 0:06:25.440 --> 0:06:30.640 a wall. Okay, you know that I tried to go 0:06:30.839 --> 0:06:34.800 to covers by black people first, and if I can't 0:06:34.839 --> 0:06:37.200 find one with a black person. I go to people 0:06:37.240 --> 0:06:41.359 of color, and usually I'm able to find something within 0:06:41.400 --> 0:06:47.839 those parameters. But this time, you guys let me down, 0:06:48.000 --> 0:06:50.640 like big time, and I found a couple of them. 0:06:50.640 --> 0:06:55.000 But then I saw this assist, this black lady. She's 0:06:55.040 --> 0:06:57.880 a teacher and she was playing an acoustic guitar and 0:06:58.160 --> 0:07:00.920 teaching the song. Well she had already taught it to them. 0:07:00.960 --> 0:07:05.040 But there was a group of like maybe between fifteen 0:07:05.080 --> 0:07:07.760 and twenty five little kids, they had to be under six, 0:07:07.920 --> 0:07:11.280 six and under, singing Starfish and Coffee. They were screaming 0:07:11.320 --> 0:07:15.160 to the top of their lungs. They were clapping off beat. 0:07:15.760 --> 0:07:18.280 It was amazing. And the only reason that it was 0:07:18.320 --> 0:07:20.920 amazing was because the kids were really cute. And to 0:07:20.960 --> 0:07:24.000 see little kids sing a print song and clap offbeat. 0:07:24.080 --> 0:07:27.200 I love when people dance and clap offbeat. I know 0:07:27.280 --> 0:07:30.760 it's evil, it's not evil. That's not evil. If you 0:07:30.800 --> 0:07:33.680 want to talk about evil, well, if you want to 0:07:33.680 --> 0:07:36.680 talk about evil, please stay tuned for the episodes that 0:07:36.680 --> 0:07:40.080 are released on March the fifteenth, because we're talking about 0:07:40.120 --> 0:07:43.360 evil things. But it is petty. But when I tell 0:07:43.400 --> 0:07:45.200 you that, it brings me a different kind of joy 0:07:45.720 --> 0:07:49.120 when I see people that can't dance or that can't 0:07:49.200 --> 0:07:53.080 catch the beat, because it's like I don't understand it, 0:07:53.880 --> 0:07:56.320 so it makes me giggle and laugh. I don't know why, 0:07:56.400 --> 0:08:00.320 but anyway, the kids are really cute. They're all kinds kids, 0:08:00.360 --> 0:08:03.680 White kids, Black kids, Latino kids, Asian kids. They're singing 0:08:03.720 --> 0:08:06.880 their little hearts out. The sister she has this acoustic guitar. 0:08:07.000 --> 0:08:10.240 She's playing the song. They're singing, they're screaming. It's a 0:08:10.240 --> 0:08:15.360 good time. So we're about to get into Starfishing Coffee 0:08:16.040 --> 0:08:19.360 performed by a cover of Starfishing Coffee performed by the 0:08:19.400 --> 0:08:24.280 Community the Community Roots Charter School. You know it's gonna 0:08:24.320 --> 0:08:28.280 be good, So sit back, get into the jam, listen 0:08:28.320 --> 0:08:30.240 to it. But make sure that you go and you 0:08:30.320 --> 0:08:32.960 listen to the real version, which I also linked in 0:08:33.000 --> 0:08:35.520 the show notes. Make sure you listen to the real 0:08:35.600 --> 0:09:20.800 version and just enjoy. Enjoy the kids. Man. Now let's 0:09:20.840 --> 0:09:29.680 get into the show. Yea. So, friends and Ken today, 0:09:30.160 --> 0:09:32.960 first and foremost, hello again. Even though I just said 0:09:32.960 --> 0:09:36.720 hello about five minutes ago, I wanted to say it 0:09:36.720 --> 0:09:39.440 again to you. Today. We are just gonna have a 0:09:39.480 --> 0:09:41.960 little dialogue, a little conversation about a couple of little 0:09:42.000 --> 0:09:46.959 things that I've been thinking about. First, let me say that, 0:09:47.080 --> 0:09:49.199 can y'all believe that it has been a whole damn 0:09:49.280 --> 0:09:53.080 three hundred and sixty five days, an entire year since 0:09:53.120 --> 0:09:56.080 I released the very first episode of this show, which 0:09:56.120 --> 0:10:01.440 was a trailer, a whole year. March first, twenty I 0:10:01.480 --> 0:10:04.880 released the trailer, just giving y'all a little glimpse into 0:10:04.960 --> 0:10:07.040 what I thought I was planning to share with you 0:10:07.120 --> 0:10:10.760 in on April first, which is the official day that 0:10:10.880 --> 0:10:15.560 I launched this podcast. That's like the observed holiday, because 0:10:15.600 --> 0:10:19.480 that's the day that I said, I'm here, I'm here, 0:10:19.520 --> 0:10:27.280 We're here, us is here. We as together. So this show, 0:10:27.360 --> 0:10:30.320 this podcast was definitely berthed or I gave birth to 0:10:30.360 --> 0:10:33.840 it at the top of a global pandemi as I'm 0:10:33.880 --> 0:10:36.520 calling it now, because I changed the name all the time. 0:10:36.559 --> 0:10:40.479 So I started this podcast at the top of the pandemi. 0:10:42.000 --> 0:10:45.880 And although that is when she was born, I'm gonna 0:10:45.920 --> 0:10:49.160 let it be as she. She's an auntie, respect her pronouns. 0:10:49.600 --> 0:10:54.839 But it's still thriving, it's still going, and I don't 0:10:54.880 --> 0:10:58.599 plan on going anywhere anytime soon. And you know, it 0:10:58.679 --> 0:11:02.280 still amazes me that I have listeners on every single 0:11:02.320 --> 0:11:05.679 continent with the exception of Antarctica, as I have said before, 0:11:05.760 --> 0:11:08.200 that I know of because they could be listening, it's 0:11:08.240 --> 0:11:10.319 just that they're not tracking for it. They're not checking 0:11:10.320 --> 0:11:13.960 for Antarctica, okay, and for me, like that's some dope shit. 0:11:15.240 --> 0:11:17.880 It actually still blows my mind that people actually still 0:11:17.960 --> 0:11:22.320 listen to me regularly. And I think that, like I 0:11:22.400 --> 0:11:25.120 have the words, but I can't really express to you 0:11:25.200 --> 0:11:30.080 in full like how that makes me feel. I have 0:11:30.200 --> 0:11:33.319 been a talker since I realized that I could speak words, 0:11:33.400 --> 0:11:35.600 and even before I spoke words, I probably made a 0:11:35.600 --> 0:11:39.040 lot of sounds. And I think about all those times 0:11:39.080 --> 0:11:40.720 that people have told me in my life that I 0:11:40.760 --> 0:11:45.360 talk too much, which happens still to this day, and 0:11:45.440 --> 0:11:48.840 I think about the times where people have shushed me. 0:11:49.120 --> 0:11:50.559 I just want you to know that I'm gonna just 0:11:50.640 --> 0:11:54.160 keep on talking, just an fy because talking works for me. 0:11:54.200 --> 0:11:56.720 It's always worked for me, and I'm not gonna stop talking. 0:11:56.800 --> 0:12:01.800 So do with that with you will, moving forward, as 0:12:01.840 --> 0:12:04.040 I did in November for the close of the first 0:12:04.080 --> 0:12:08.120 season of Handing My Purse. On April the first for 0:12:08.200 --> 0:12:11.320 the Handing My purse, first birthday or anniversary. I haven't 0:12:11.320 --> 0:12:13.800 really decided what I'm going to call it yet. Either way, 0:12:13.800 --> 0:12:16.480 there's going to be a celebration, a virtual celebration. Since 0:12:16.559 --> 0:12:20.959 we are still not really able to convene in person, 0:12:21.760 --> 0:12:25.679 there will be a celebration. Plus I don't really play 0:12:25.720 --> 0:12:29.280 around with the pandemic like that, so so yeah, we 0:12:29.320 --> 0:12:35.080 will just be playing virtually until we make some serious 0:12:35.080 --> 0:12:38.720 progress out here in these COVID streets, because folks are 0:12:38.760 --> 0:12:41.600 still out here while in for respect and playing games 0:12:41.800 --> 0:12:45.120 and I'm good, no grassis, I don't want to play 0:12:45.120 --> 0:12:49.360 around with it because no, thank you. Please make sure 0:12:49.360 --> 0:12:52.120 to pay attention, pay close attention to my Instagram for 0:12:52.160 --> 0:12:54.880 how to be a part of this event. I'm really 0:12:54.920 --> 0:12:57.680 excited that it's going to be a celebration. I really 0:12:57.720 --> 0:13:02.240 haven't figured out exactly how I'm going to put it 0:13:02.280 --> 0:13:05.240 all together, but I guess I got about twenty one 0:13:05.320 --> 0:13:08.280 days to figure it out. Actually, I have about fifteen 0:13:08.400 --> 0:13:10.959 days to figure it out to be really honest, based 0:13:11.000 --> 0:13:13.280 on what I'm thinking that I'm going to do. But 0:13:14.080 --> 0:13:17.440 it will be virtual. I'm really excited. I can't wait 0:13:17.440 --> 0:13:19.440 for outside to open back up so that we can 0:13:19.480 --> 0:13:23.000 gather and celebrate in person. I want to meet so 0:13:23.040 --> 0:13:28.160 many of you, unless you are a psychopath, because if so, 0:13:28.360 --> 0:13:30.160 I don't want to meet you and we can just talk, 0:13:30.760 --> 0:13:34.720 you know, we can just keep it real instagrammy, how 0:13:34.720 --> 0:13:39.679 about that? But celebrating is a must. I celebrate all 0:13:39.679 --> 0:13:42.520 of the winds. I want to normalize celebrating all of 0:13:42.559 --> 0:13:46.959 the winds, no matter how small or how big. One 0:13:47.000 --> 0:13:49.000 of my favorite words is grandiose. So if I say 0:13:49.000 --> 0:13:53.120 it a lot, now you understand why how small, how grandiose. 0:13:53.200 --> 0:13:56.079 It's important to celebrate ourselves and to celebrate one another. 0:13:56.800 --> 0:13:58.760 And a lot of times people think it's silly to 0:13:58.800 --> 0:14:01.079 celebrate these moments like okay, you made it to a 0:14:01.160 --> 0:14:03.319 year or so what. But that kind of tells me 0:14:03.360 --> 0:14:05.200 a lot about that person as a human and how 0:14:05.280 --> 0:14:08.800 they process like emotional information, and it tells me about 0:14:08.840 --> 0:14:13.280 their emotional intelligence. And another thing is that I've seen 0:14:13.360 --> 0:14:18.320 online people particularly black particularly is a hard word to 0:14:18.360 --> 0:14:21.800 say if you say it fast, particularly of course, and 0:14:21.800 --> 0:14:24.680 then I said right that time, right, anyway, I've seen 0:14:24.680 --> 0:14:27.320 a lot of people online, particularly black women. While I 0:14:27.360 --> 0:14:30.120 said it perfect that time too. Sorry anyway, I digress 0:14:30.760 --> 0:14:33.720 black women online talking a lot about normalizing luxury for 0:14:33.800 --> 0:14:38.280 black women, which I fully goddamn support. We shouldn't even 0:14:38.280 --> 0:14:41.120 have to normalize it because it should just be a 0:14:41.160 --> 0:14:44.520 part of our damn existence and without anybody questioning it 0:14:44.640 --> 0:14:48.040 or having anything to say about it. However, I kind 0:14:48.080 --> 0:14:52.800 of feel more importantly that it is important for us 0:14:53.040 --> 0:14:58.520 to normalize or focus on the concept of normalizing the 0:14:58.560 --> 0:15:02.160 celebration of wh all of our wins, whatever they look like. 0:15:02.960 --> 0:15:07.400 And it's funny, you know, I had this show already 0:15:07.400 --> 0:15:11.720 and outlined, but just today I talked to my little brother, 0:15:11.760 --> 0:15:14.840 who definitely believes he is a fashion guru, and quite frankly, 0:15:14.880 --> 0:15:17.440 the kid wears some pretty amazing outfits. He has pretty 0:15:17.440 --> 0:15:20.520 good style, he's pretty dope. But shout out to my 0:15:20.520 --> 0:15:23.080 little brother Isaiah. I love that kid. Anyway, he posted 0:15:23.120 --> 0:15:28.960 on Instagram some in his stories, very nonchalantly that some 0:15:29.680 --> 0:15:33.160 Instagram fashion accounts or some style accounts on Instagram have 0:15:33.280 --> 0:15:36.600 featured him, like four of them, not like one, like 0:15:36.680 --> 0:15:38.640 four different ones, and the posts were like a month 0:15:38.680 --> 0:15:40.680 and some change old. So I sent him a DM 0:15:41.720 --> 0:15:47.320 like what's up with this? And sent all these celebration emojis, 0:15:47.360 --> 0:15:49.480 and I was like, yes, yes, I'm so proud of you. 0:15:49.800 --> 0:15:52.120 Why didn't you share these before or tell me about him, 0:15:52.200 --> 0:15:54.640 to which he said that it wasn't really a big deal. 0:15:55.120 --> 0:15:57.120 And I told him, Oh, you're a damn lie. This 0:15:57.200 --> 0:16:00.440 is a big deal. This is great, This is you know, important, 0:16:00.440 --> 0:16:02.760 because this is important to you. You put a lot 0:16:02.760 --> 0:16:05.360 of effort into you know, how you dress, in your style, 0:16:05.440 --> 0:16:07.960 and for you to be acknowledged for it, like that's 0:16:07.960 --> 0:16:12.200 a thing. And in twenty twenty one, were celebrating all 0:16:12.240 --> 0:16:14.440 the winds Homie, like all of them. This is major 0:16:14.440 --> 0:16:15.880 and I'm proud of you and you are the man. 0:16:16.680 --> 0:16:19.120 My other brother, my middle brother, he was in a 0:16:19.240 --> 0:16:21.880 music video last year with Snoop Dog, So I was like, 0:16:22.000 --> 0:16:24.360 I'm really excited for you, Like you know, me and 0:16:24.400 --> 0:16:25.960 my cousins we were like, all right, we see you 0:16:26.000 --> 0:16:30.240 out here winning in videos with Snoop Dog, like hobnobbing 0:16:30.280 --> 0:16:32.880 with snobs, okay, And I did the whole proud big 0:16:32.960 --> 0:16:35.880 sister thing again with him. Well out again. This was 0:16:35.920 --> 0:16:39.040 before this, because this just happened, but it's a major thing. 0:16:39.040 --> 0:16:41.440 We celebrate wins all day and day. That's what we're doing. 0:16:42.040 --> 0:16:44.840 And in a world where our lives mean so little 0:16:44.880 --> 0:16:48.280 to so many people, and even people who look like us. 0:16:48.320 --> 0:16:51.200 So let's just sit in that for him in at first. 0:16:55.280 --> 0:16:59.040 And no, I'm not only speaking about black on black crime. 0:16:59.120 --> 0:17:01.520 People always going to pull that out, you know, and 0:17:01.600 --> 0:17:04.320 not that it's not important or that it's not something 0:17:04.359 --> 0:17:06.800 that needs to be addressed. But that's not the only 0:17:06.880 --> 0:17:10.080 way that we tear each other down right in this life. 0:17:10.480 --> 0:17:13.600 Think about all the ways that it manifests itself in 0:17:13.680 --> 0:17:17.720 our daily lives, in our culture. Anyway. We need to 0:17:17.720 --> 0:17:20.639 celebrate ourselves, and we need to celebrate one another. We 0:17:20.680 --> 0:17:22.359 need to love up on each other. We need to 0:17:22.440 --> 0:17:24.359 cheer for each other. We need to be each other's 0:17:24.400 --> 0:17:28.040 greatest hype women and hype men and hype people. And 0:17:28.119 --> 0:17:30.080 we need to do this often for each other. We 0:17:30.119 --> 0:17:32.520 need to do it regularly. It needs to be something 0:17:32.600 --> 0:17:36.119 that is a part of our everyday movement because the 0:17:36.160 --> 0:17:37.960 truth of the matter is that if we don't do 0:17:38.000 --> 0:17:40.840 it for one another, who will Please tell me that? 0:17:41.680 --> 0:17:45.920 I kind of feel like not celebrating our own winds 0:17:45.960 --> 0:17:50.480 individually and collectively is an indirect act of self loathing. 0:17:50.840 --> 0:17:56.600 So yes, normalize luxury. Absolutely, yes normalize celebrating one another 0:17:56.720 --> 0:18:01.240 and ourselves. But more importantly, how about we normalize black joy? Oop? 0:18:02.160 --> 0:18:07.720 Because it is not something that is I think it's 0:18:07.760 --> 0:18:10.440 not something that I feel is socially acceptable for black 0:18:10.440 --> 0:18:13.040 people to just be happy for no reason, Like there 0:18:13.040 --> 0:18:15.760 always has to be something up with it. It always 0:18:15.760 --> 0:18:18.200 has to be like a catch, you know what I mean? 0:18:19.000 --> 0:18:22.240 So why don't we start with normalizing black joy? Boom? 0:18:22.480 --> 0:18:24.880 There we go, woomp, there it is. I thought you knew. 0:18:25.119 --> 0:18:27.600 That's the pie. That's the whole pie. We can slice 0:18:27.600 --> 0:18:30.760 this pie up, however, we choose for T shirts, for 0:18:30.960 --> 0:18:33.359 likes on Instagram, for all of the things. We can 0:18:33.359 --> 0:18:35.720 slice it up and present it in different ways with 0:18:35.800 --> 0:18:39.760 the keys to start normalizing joy for black folks because 0:18:39.760 --> 0:18:42.000 we deserve to be happy. God damn, it's the very 0:18:42.080 --> 0:18:45.879 least that we could do is just be happy. Okay, 0:18:46.520 --> 0:18:48.359 think about it. Have you ever been in a joyous 0:18:48.400 --> 0:18:50.840 mood or you know, been in a really good mood? Well, 0:18:50.880 --> 0:18:53.280 let's just start with that shit start over. Have you 0:18:53.320 --> 0:18:55.320 ever been in a joyous mood? Because some of y'all 0:18:55.359 --> 0:18:57.840 I don't know, But have you ever been in a 0:18:57.920 --> 0:19:00.840 really joyful mood? Or your energy has really been up 0:19:00.880 --> 0:19:04.520 in light and somebody says to you, what are you 0:19:04.560 --> 0:19:07.679 so happy for? Or why are you in such a 0:19:07.720 --> 0:19:11.359 good mood? Or something to that effect that concept and 0:19:11.480 --> 0:19:14.040 just saying that to someone is crazy to me. And 0:19:14.119 --> 0:19:15.840 I know that I've done it in the past, and 0:19:15.880 --> 0:19:19.000 it's still insane. I ain't exempt. But the truth is, 0:19:19.080 --> 0:19:22.159 and I say this all the time, what is the 0:19:22.240 --> 0:19:27.520 alternative to me being in a good mood? I remember 0:19:28.240 --> 0:19:30.840 some years ago, it's probably like ten or fifteen years ago, 0:19:30.880 --> 0:19:34.400 my cousin Julia, who is a social worker, told me 0:19:34.560 --> 0:19:37.720 a story once about how someone at her job said 0:19:37.800 --> 0:19:40.879 something like that to her, and her response was just that, 0:19:41.040 --> 0:19:43.320 what is the alternative? And when I tell you that 0:19:43.320 --> 0:19:45.920 thing sad with me and I still carry it around 0:19:45.960 --> 0:19:48.919 with me to this day because the truth of the 0:19:48.920 --> 0:19:51.760 matter is, like, let's just keep it real. What is 0:19:51.760 --> 0:19:55.960 the damn alternative? Like, what are my other options? Being 0:19:56.000 --> 0:20:00.119 gloomy and sad and riddled with melancholy and sullen and 0:20:00.320 --> 0:20:05.920 all of the other synonyms that mean sad and gloomy 0:20:05.960 --> 0:20:10.240 and down not actively seeking out moments of joy and bliss, 0:20:10.359 --> 0:20:14.280 just down down bad, as they're saying. I think the 0:20:14.359 --> 0:20:18.119 kids say that now he was down bad I was 0:20:18.160 --> 0:20:20.640 down bad. I can't remember, you know, I've been I've 0:20:20.640 --> 0:20:22.640 been away from kids for a long time. It's time 0:20:22.640 --> 0:20:24.560 for me to get back around some kids because I 0:20:24.600 --> 0:20:27.000 need to learn some new slang. I feel like I'm 0:20:27.040 --> 0:20:29.920 losing my cool auntie mojo. I need to get it back. 0:20:31.160 --> 0:20:34.600 But like, who wants to be the human manifestation of Yore? 0:20:35.520 --> 0:20:37.119 Raise your hand? I know I can't see it, but 0:20:37.200 --> 0:20:39.520 raise your hand anyway. Raise your hand if you know 0:20:39.640 --> 0:20:44.160 somebody who is like the human embodiment of Yore from 0:20:45.040 --> 0:20:47.840 what's the little name Winnie the Pooh. I'm getting old. 0:20:49.359 --> 0:20:51.440 Raise your hand if you know a human or because 0:20:51.480 --> 0:20:54.840 I know a couple of them and being around them 0:20:54.920 --> 0:21:00.400 sometimes can literally be draining on my spirit, because really 0:21:00.480 --> 0:21:03.400 that's exactly what some of you folks are out there 0:21:03.400 --> 0:21:07.879 in these streets, just out here walking around, just being 0:21:08.160 --> 0:21:11.720 sad and spread and gloom and doom everywhere you go. 0:21:12.440 --> 0:21:14.159 But you know, like, we got to do better than that. 0:21:14.960 --> 0:21:17.840 We owe it to ourselves. We owe it to ourselves 0:21:18.320 --> 0:21:22.240 first and foremost for ourselves. We gotta do better for 0:21:22.320 --> 0:21:24.600 our families. We have to do better for our friends, 0:21:24.600 --> 0:21:27.400 for our communities, for our children, and for the future 0:21:27.960 --> 0:21:33.800 generational melancholy and generational sadness better known as generational trauma. 0:21:33.880 --> 0:21:35.200 And this is just one of the ways that it 0:21:35.280 --> 0:21:39.520 manifests like it ain't what's up? We need to be 0:21:39.560 --> 0:21:42.600 out here trying to be all different types of happy, 0:21:43.240 --> 0:21:47.040 finding all different types of joy. Stop it, friends like 0:21:47.119 --> 0:21:49.960 we deserve better. So to our ancestors, they didn't die 0:21:50.000 --> 0:21:52.840 for us to be out here moping around and stuff 0:21:53.520 --> 0:22:00.199 and the words a little duvall smile, bitch, smile. So 0:22:00.320 --> 0:22:03.240 I'm sure that some of you are wondering how doth 0:22:03.320 --> 0:22:06.680 one turn this state of melancholy around? Mimi. I can 0:22:06.720 --> 0:22:09.040 just hear y'all ask, and I can feel into my spirit. 0:22:09.480 --> 0:22:11.640 And if you ain't asking, you should because you might 0:22:11.680 --> 0:22:15.080 be a human manifestation of Yore. And if you are, 0:22:15.080 --> 0:22:18.080 and nobody has told you, you need to get new friends. 0:22:19.080 --> 0:22:20.959 So let me share what I've done, or how I 0:22:21.000 --> 0:22:24.000 think it can be achieved. More than likely what I've done. 0:22:24.040 --> 0:22:26.200 Not that I used to be a human manifestation of Yore, 0:22:26.280 --> 0:22:30.480 but we all have down days, right. The most important 0:22:30.560 --> 0:22:34.000 thing is to always remember to be intentional. What do 0:22:34.040 --> 0:22:36.479 you mean by being intentional? Mimi? Once again I hear 0:22:36.560 --> 0:22:41.320 y'all asking me a question that is very simple. Being 0:22:41.359 --> 0:22:46.040 intentional is choosing how you move. It's about being strategic. 0:22:46.920 --> 0:22:48.639 If the goal is to find peace of mind and 0:22:48.720 --> 0:22:51.560 find joy and be happy, you create, excuse me, a 0:22:51.640 --> 0:22:55.920 strategy to get there. What does joy look like for you? Right? 0:22:56.040 --> 0:22:59.440 What does joy mean in your life? What does peace 0:22:59.480 --> 0:23:02.000 of mind like for you? How does it show up 0:23:02.000 --> 0:23:05.760 in your life? In your mind? Visualize this? What do 0:23:05.840 --> 0:23:08.320 you do when you are happy? And if you don't know, 0:23:09.000 --> 0:23:13.720 create it? Make it up. If your response is, well, shit, 0:23:13.800 --> 0:23:15.360 I don't know if I've ever been happy, I don't 0:23:15.359 --> 0:23:18.960 know how to be happy. Make it up. Tap into 0:23:19.000 --> 0:23:22.960 that like juvenile or that you know, childlike place, because 0:23:23.000 --> 0:23:24.960 we all have it. Even if you had a fucked 0:23:25.040 --> 0:23:27.960 up childhood, you have it, and you have an imagination. 0:23:29.119 --> 0:23:32.120 Even if your imagination is dark, you still have one. 0:23:32.440 --> 0:23:35.840 It's still there, which lets me know that you can create. 0:23:36.400 --> 0:23:39.520 So you can create it to look however you want 0:23:39.520 --> 0:23:42.800 it to look. So visualize it and then create the 0:23:42.840 --> 0:23:46.480 imagery that you want to create a life of joy 0:23:46.760 --> 0:23:50.440 and to create and to create, excuse me, a life 0:23:50.440 --> 0:23:54.199 of peace? Right? Dream it? Dream the life wherein you 0:23:54.240 --> 0:23:57.840 are filled with joy, and you feel at peace. Now 0:23:58.520 --> 0:24:00.480 you need to create the life's map to get there. 0:24:01.119 --> 0:24:04.479 It's just like goal setting. It's just goal setting on 0:24:04.520 --> 0:24:10.560 a much more grandiose level. There goes the grandiose word again. Huh. 0:24:10.600 --> 0:24:13.239 You create the map. Here's the thing, the keys that 0:24:13.359 --> 0:24:16.240 you are in control of all of this. And don't 0:24:16.240 --> 0:24:18.800 get me wrong, this shit is not easy work at all. 0:24:19.640 --> 0:24:22.760 But like I said earlier, what's the alternative a life 0:24:22.760 --> 0:24:28.320 of discomfort or being content with being miserable? No, it's 0:24:28.320 --> 0:24:30.960