1 00:00:03,440 --> 00:00:06,680 Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I Heart Radio. 2 00:00:09,240 --> 00:00:14,160 Speaker 1: Good Morning. This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. 3 00:00:14,840 --> 00:00:18,880 Speaker 1: Today's tip is to use polite questions as a way 4 00:00:18,920 --> 00:00:23,000 Speaker 1: to nudge people to reconsider things. Many of us are 5 00:00:23,040 --> 00:00:26,760 Speaker 1: working and doing life differently these days. This is an 6 00:00:26,800 --> 00:00:33,440 Speaker 1: opportunity to challenge long held assumptions. Asking subversive, but polite 7 00:00:33,560 --> 00:00:37,160 Speaker 1: questions is a good way to inch this process along. 8 00:00:38,560 --> 00:00:41,479 Speaker 1: I was thinking of this topic while reading Michelle King's 9 00:00:41,520 --> 00:00:44,600 Speaker 1: new book The Fix, which is about the barriers women 10 00:00:44,640 --> 00:00:48,280 Speaker 1: often face while building their careers. King, who is the 11 00:00:48,320 --> 00:00:52,000 Speaker 1: director of Inclusion at Netflix, mentioned that as her husband 12 00:00:52,040 --> 00:00:55,840 Speaker 1: gained awareness about these issues, he didn't start walking around 13 00:00:55,840 --> 00:01:00,400 Speaker 1: with protest signs at the office. Instead, he started asking 14 00:01:00,880 --> 00:01:04,319 Speaker 1: why things were as they were. For instance, when a 15 00:01:04,440 --> 00:01:07,480 Speaker 1: manager mentioned that a woman on his team probably shouldn't 16 00:01:07,520 --> 00:01:10,800 Speaker 1: get promoted because she was getting married soon, he asked 17 00:01:11,280 --> 00:01:15,160 Speaker 1: why that was. If someone then wants to spell out 18 00:01:15,200 --> 00:01:18,720 Speaker 1: an assumption that newly married women will soon have babies 19 00:01:18,720 --> 00:01:21,560 Speaker 1: and lose all interest in work, well let them spell 20 00:01:21,640 --> 00:01:25,520 Speaker 1: this idea out. A question is not a direct challenge 21 00:01:25,560 --> 00:01:29,360 Speaker 1: to authority, but as people need to explain their assumptions, 22 00:01:29,840 --> 00:01:32,319 Speaker 1: It brings them into the light where they can be 23 00:01:32,360 --> 00:01:38,240 Speaker 1: dealt with. But asking subversive questions isn't just about countering discrimination. 24 00:01:38,920 --> 00:01:42,880 Speaker 1: It's a useful tactic in all kinds of situations. Many 25 00:01:42,920 --> 00:01:45,080 Speaker 1: of us have spent the past six weeks or so 26 00:01:45,480 --> 00:01:49,760 Speaker 1: working remotely. Many folks doing this are in jobs where 27 00:01:49,760 --> 00:01:53,320 Speaker 1: they were previously told that working from home would never 28 00:01:53,440 --> 00:01:57,880 Speaker 1: be an option. Interesting, right, I can just imagine someone 29 00:01:57,920 --> 00:02:02,280 Speaker 1: in the past asking these subverse, of but polite questions. Well, 30 00:02:02,320 --> 00:02:05,600 Speaker 1: of course, working face to face is nice, But have 31 00:02:05,720 --> 00:02:08,840 Speaker 1: we thought about how our organization would keep functioning in 32 00:02:08,880 --> 00:02:13,200 Speaker 1: a pandemic, or if there were three weeks of horrible snowstorms, 33 00:02:13,880 --> 00:02:17,440 Speaker 1: or if all the roads around headquarters were suddenly declared unsafe. 34 00:02:18,800 --> 00:02:22,840 Speaker 1: Those subversive questions would have been quite useful, And so 35 00:02:22,919 --> 00:02:25,160 Speaker 1: we can see that maybe now is the time to 36 00:02:25,280 --> 00:02:29,040 Speaker 1: ask more of them. Maybe when your office went remote, 37 00:02:29,080 --> 00:02:31,960 Speaker 1: your team's daily ten a m. Meeting got converted into 38 00:02:32,000 --> 00:02:35,880 Speaker 1: a conference call. Maybe now you ask your manager, can 39 00:02:35,880 --> 00:02:38,600 Speaker 1: you explain to me the agenda for this conference call? 40 00:02:39,639 --> 00:02:42,760 Speaker 1: Maybe you see that there rarely is one and having 41 00:02:42,800 --> 00:02:45,600 Speaker 1: an agenda would make the call a much better use 42 00:02:45,639 --> 00:02:49,520 Speaker 1: of time. Or maybe this question nudges the realization that 43 00:02:49,600 --> 00:02:53,040 Speaker 1: the meeting is kind of pointless. People can check in 44 00:02:53,080 --> 00:02:56,080 Speaker 1: on Slack and not interrupt the deep work they're doing 45 00:02:56,280 --> 00:02:59,480 Speaker 1: in the mornings. Or maybe you ask, can you tell 46 00:02:59,480 --> 00:03:01,239 Speaker 1: me why it's a important for us to be logged 47 00:03:01,240 --> 00:03:04,680 Speaker 1: in from eight am to five pm. It's a simple question, 48 00:03:05,520 --> 00:03:08,160 Speaker 1: but it might nudge the thought that actually a lot 49 00:03:08,200 --> 00:03:11,840 Speaker 1: of work can be done flexibly. Some core hours might 50 00:03:11,880 --> 00:03:15,520 Speaker 1: be great, but seldom is the full eight to nine 51 00:03:15,560 --> 00:03:19,799 Speaker 1: hour work day necessary. What I like about the question 52 00:03:19,840 --> 00:03:23,639 Speaker 1: approach is that it's gentle. There may be good reasons 53 00:03:23,680 --> 00:03:25,799 Speaker 1: for things, and this gives the powers that be the 54 00:03:25,880 --> 00:03:29,760 Speaker 1: chance to explain them. But when the answer is awkward 55 00:03:30,280 --> 00:03:32,440 Speaker 1: because the person can see that he or she is 56 00:03:32,480 --> 00:03:34,720 Speaker 1: about to say, well, we've just always done it this way, 57 00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:39,600 Speaker 1: or well everyone knows that right, then questions can instigate 58 00:03:39,720 --> 00:03:44,440 Speaker 1: change without preaching and protest. And since we do all 59 00:03:44,480 --> 00:03:47,680 Speaker 1: have to keep working together, it's best to make allies 60 00:03:48,360 --> 00:03:53,640 Speaker 1: rather than enemies. In the meantime. This is Laura, Thanks 61 00:03:53,640 --> 00:03:56,520 Speaker 1: for listening, and here's to making the most of our time. 62 00:03:58,720 --> 00:04:05,280 Speaker 1: M Hey, everybody, I'd love to hear from you. You 63 00:04:05,280 --> 00:04:08,080 Speaker 1: can send me your tips, your questions, or anything else. 64 00:04:08,800 --> 00:04:12,400 Speaker 1: Just connect with me on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram at 65 00:04:12,440 --> 00:04:17,280 Speaker 1: Before Breakfast pod. That's b E the number four, then 66 00:04:17,360 --> 00:04:20,760 Speaker 1: Breakfast p o D. You can also shoot me an 67 00:04:20,760 --> 00:04:24,599 Speaker 1: email at Before Breakfast podcast at i heeart media dot 68 00:04:24,600 --> 00:04:27,480 Speaker 1: com that Before Breakfast is spelled out with all the letters. 69 00:04:28,160 --> 00:04:30,239 Speaker 1: Thanks so much, should I look forward to staying in touch. 70 00:04:36,040 --> 00:04:39,120 Speaker 1: Before Breakfast is a production of I heart Radio. For 71 00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:42,280 Speaker 1: more podcasts from my heart Radio, visit the i heart 72 00:04:42,360 --> 00:04:45,719 Speaker 1: Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your 73 00:04:45,760 --> 00:04:46,440 Speaker 1: favorite shows.