Speaker 1: For me personally, it was because I didn't have a choice.
Speaker 1: There was no other option that was taken away from
Speaker 1: me with the passing of my son's father that I
Speaker 1: was forced into. I am alone. Now. Who do you
Speaker 1: trust when you don't have anything else to lean on
Speaker 1: and stand on? All you have is what you came
Speaker 1: here with. It's you in the divine. Hey everyone, welcome
Speaker 1: back to On Purpose, the number one health podcast in
Speaker 1: the world. Thanks to each and every single one of
Speaker 1: you who come back every week to listen, learn and grow.
Speaker 1: And I am so excited to be talking to you today.
Speaker 1: I can't believe it. My new book, Eight Rules of
Speaker 1: Love is out and I cannot wait to share it
Speaker 1: with you. I am so so excited for you to
Speaker 1: read this book, for you to listen to this book.
Speaker 1: I read the audiobook. If you haven't got it already,
Speaker 1: make sure you go to eight Rules of Love dot com.
Speaker 1: It's dedicated to anyone who's trying to find, keep, or
Speaker 1: let go of love. So if you've got friends that
Speaker 1: are dating, broken up, or struggling with love, make sure
Speaker 1: you grab this book. And I'd love to invite you
Speaker 1: to come and see me for my global tour love Rules.
Speaker 1: Go to Ja shettytour dot com to learn more information
Speaker 1: about tickets, VIP experiences and more. I can't wait to
Speaker 1: see you this year now. I love these episodes when
Speaker 1: I get to sit down with dear friends, people that
Speaker 1: I have spent deep, quality, heartfelt time with, and I
Speaker 1: get the opportunity to share them with you because they
Speaker 1: have such a wealth of insights, such a wealth of wisdom,
Speaker 1: such a wealth of life experience. But I have to
Speaker 1: move into my interviewer mode and make sure that you
Speaker 1: know about how epic they are as well behind the scenes.
Speaker 1: I mean, they are doing a lot more than being
Speaker 1: my friend. So today's guest is none other than Lauren
Speaker 1: London and la native career skyrocketed after starring in the
Speaker 1: film ATL and Miss London's career in the year since
Speaker 1: ATL includes a number of feature films and television series,
Speaker 1: including This Christmas, Next Day Air, Tyler Perry's Medea, Big
Speaker 1: Habby Family, I Love You, Beth Cooper Baggage claimed The
Speaker 1: Perfect Match, as well as television series HBO's Entourage, nine
Speaker 1: two one zero, Single Ladies, and The Game. In twenty nineteen,
Speaker 1: she appeared in the BT series Games People play, which
Speaker 1: is currently in production on season two. Season one centered
Speaker 1: around London's character Vanessa King. And then this was a
Speaker 1: movie that I just saw recently. In the spring of
Speaker 1: twenty twenty one, Tom Clancy's Without Remorse, starring Michael B.
Speaker 1: Jordan was released with Laurence starring as Pam Kelly. There
Speaker 1: are so many more amazing things that Lauren's working on
Speaker 1: behind the scenes, so many other incredible things that in
Speaker 1: production and Netflix mini series True Story alongside Kevin Hart
Speaker 1: and Wesley Snipes, and she's producing much more further projects
Speaker 1: as well. Beyond all of this amazingness on screen, what
Speaker 1: I can truly say is that having spent pretty much
Speaker 1: like four hours a week with this incredible woman for
Speaker 1: the past twelve months, maybe more, is that there are
Speaker 1: very few people who carry the energy she carries. And
Speaker 1: in any room Lauren walks into, she lights it up
Speaker 1: with love, with grace, with this beautiful presence. And my
Speaker 1: wife and I are not only huge fans of her
Speaker 1: work on screen, we believe she's one of the most
Speaker 1: hilarious people offscreen. We love you, Lauren. Thank you so
Speaker 1: much for doing the On Purpose podcast, and it is
Speaker 1: so great to have you on the show. Thanks for
Speaker 1: being here, Lauren. Oh, thank you jay Man. The introduction
Speaker 1: was like a plus plus. You make me excited about myself.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I guess I've been working for why you've
Speaker 1: You know, you've done so much in your career, and
Speaker 1: I always feel blessed when I get to see people
Speaker 1: on screen and offscreen, because I think we're all humans
Speaker 1: that have real lives and real experiences. But I mean,
Speaker 1: everything in that intro was true, So congratulations to you.
Speaker 1: I mean, you know it's it's all your hard work
Speaker 1: and all your achievements. I hope we get a special
Speaker 1: appearance from crossoad Cam today in the shot. You know,
Speaker 1: one can only hope. I don't want to snack very soon.
Speaker 1: But Lauren, I want to start with just diving straight in.
Speaker 1: You know, you have experienced so much in your career,
Speaker 1: so many amazing life changing moments, but at the same time,
Speaker 1: in your personal life, you've been given so many surprises
Speaker 1: and pivots and changes and challenges. And I want to
Speaker 1: hear about your journey as to how you've found grace,
Speaker 1: spiritual connection and how have you been guided by that
Speaker 1: through some of the most difficult things that anyone in
Speaker 1: the world would ever have to experience, you know, my
Speaker 1: spiritual journey. It had so many transformations. So I had
Speaker 1: a very traumatic childhood, you could say, with just a
Speaker 1: lot of abuse and you know, neglect, and not at
Speaker 1: the hands of my mother though, let me clear that up.
Speaker 1: And so I was very very connected to God at
Speaker 1: a really early age. I just remember hearing God very
Speaker 1: very very clear. And then you know, as I grew up,
Speaker 1: I lost a bit of my connection to God and
Speaker 1: then got reintroduced to God in another way in my
Speaker 1: early adulthood. And then really when Nit passed, I felt
Speaker 1: like that was when I had to really really get
Speaker 1: to know God personally, not in theory, not an idea,
Speaker 1: not you know, only when things are good to pray
Speaker 1: and devote. It made me feel like I wanted to
Speaker 1: really understand our purpose here on earth, why we were here,
Speaker 1: what are we to do here? I didn't want to
Speaker 1: live a life in vain. I wanted to be on purpose,
Speaker 1: and so it just it was this like this thirst
Speaker 1: for the truth. I think when tragedy happens, you you
Speaker 1: can either just survive or survive and thrive. And I
Speaker 1: really made the choice to survive and thrive, and I
Speaker 1: feel like I can only do that through the grace
Speaker 1: of God and just being a servant of God. That's
Speaker 1: beautiful learning. Thank you for sharing that. Let's let's go
Speaker 1: back to that early childhood that you were mentioning. What
Speaker 1: was like a pivotal moment in your childhood that you
Speaker 1: believe is defined who you are and how you show up.
Speaker 1: What was a moment that happened in those early years
Speaker 1: you think taught you something so powerful that shaped who
Speaker 1: you are today. Well, you know, I think when you
Speaker 1: you know, my parents were really young, and they really
Speaker 1: tried the best, you know, with what they had and
Speaker 1: just the tools they had in their toolbox. And so
Speaker 1: I learned very early about betrayal and how being alone
Speaker 1: because I was the only child and there was a
Speaker 1: lot of violence around me and towards me, how I
Speaker 1: could only depend on God. And I learned that very
Speaker 1: early on that the humans and the adults in my
Speaker 1: life might not have been the best protectors, but that
Speaker 1: I was okay because I had faith in God, and
Speaker 1: that depending on God and leaning on God and trusting
Speaker 1: that I would be okay really carried me through my
Speaker 1: young childhood and my adulthood and just you know, clearly
Speaker 1: no one's perfect, and our parents are humans. I think
Speaker 1: that was a really hard lesson for me to learner
Speaker 1: that my parents were just humans. I think you've raised
Speaker 1: such an interesting point there, because when I think about
Speaker 1: what you're saying, I think it's so natural as a
Speaker 1: young person to look for role models, to look for protectors,
Speaker 1: to look for shelter, to look for another human to
Speaker 1: be under their wing. And when you're young and that breaks,
Speaker 1: you kind of keep looking sometimes in the wrong places too.
Speaker 1: And I know I did that in my own life,
Speaker 1: where when I couldn't find it from what seemed like
Speaker 1: the natural, traditional places of shelter, I started to find
Speaker 1: it in the wrong areas. Did you ever feel that
Speaker 1: you went down that path when you were younger, where
Speaker 1: you were taking shelter of things that now you wouldn't
Speaker 1: want your kids to do, but you kind of had
Speaker 1: no choice before you got to that God place. It's
Speaker 1: almost like before that tell us a bit about that
Speaker 1: journey of like looking for shelter in humans, looked at
Speaker 1: everything decided there was also a moment where I just
Speaker 1: you know, my faith dwindled because life happened and I
Speaker 1: was like, well, why would this happen? Clearly there's no
Speaker 1: power to be life is just crumbling around me. I
Speaker 1: was just looking outside of myself for validation. I didn't
Speaker 1: have a really good, strong sense of self worth. And
Speaker 1: so you know kids, I think children internalize everything when
Speaker 1: they're really young, and then around adolescent people always think
Speaker 1: adolescents are so troubled, and but that's when you start
Speaker 1: to express everything you even internalize that age. And so
Speaker 1: around like fourteen fifteen, I start to express everything I
Speaker 1: had internalized, and you know, I started to drink and
Speaker 1: smoke and skip school or not go to school, you know,
Speaker 1: completely not go to school at all. And I got
Speaker 1: kicked out of high school. And I went from like
Speaker 1: an honors student, which is like you know, very magnet
Speaker 1: and all all these ap classes, to never going back
Speaker 1: to school because I was so my anger was starting
Speaker 1: to come out from everything I had went through. And yeah,
Speaker 1: that and then I had a dream around like nineteen
Speaker 1: of just years of acting out, that I died. And
Speaker 1: I was like, how this is so crazy, How like, no,
Speaker 1: I'm not sick, no one knows. I'm like walking out
Speaker 1: of my mom's house. And this figure was there and
Speaker 1: the figure was like, you know, I kind of explained
Speaker 1: to me that I was leaving Earth. It was such
Speaker 1: an eerie dream and I was like, where's Jesus And
Speaker 1: the figure was like, He's not here for you. And
Speaker 1: I woke up immediately. It was Sunday morning and I
Speaker 1: literally drove myself to church and my life changed after that. Wow,
Speaker 1: I mean that those kind of dreams. Do you have
Speaker 1: dreams like that often? Or was that like a one off?
Speaker 1: And was that like at that time? Had you had
Speaker 1: other dreams around that time that were different to that. No.
Speaker 1: I used to have like very dreams that were kind
Speaker 1: of like premonitions when I was younger. I you know,
Speaker 1: of like areas and places that I would eventually see
Speaker 1: when I was older. So but nothing like that that
Speaker 1: was very specific, I think to my need of transformation.
Speaker 1: I really like the theme, Lauren, that you've kind of
Speaker 1: touched on in your own life and in your past,
Speaker 1: because I think you're spot on that when we're young
Speaker 1: and even when we get older, we're constantly looking for
Speaker 1: a protector and shelter, and we almost go from like
Speaker 1: will you be my protector? And then that person lets
Speaker 1: us down and then we go to this person and say, well, no,
Speaker 1: you be my protector, and then they let us down
Speaker 1: and we keep doing that. The fact that you've raised
Speaker 1: that is really powerful because I think sometimes we don't
Speaker 1: even know we're doing that because you're not saying it
Speaker 1: in those words. You're not saying be my protector, but
Speaker 1: inside in your heart, that's kind of what you're looking for.
Speaker 1: Tell us about those lessons you learned when you went
Speaker 1: down the wrong paths and chose some of the wrong
Speaker 1: I think what I really what I've learned from being
Speaker 1: younger and looking outside of myself for protection and safety
Speaker 1: and comfort, was that the ultimate comfort and protection comes
Speaker 1: from a higher power. It came from God for me.
Speaker 1: And I was telling you just being a single mother
Speaker 1: and a single woman now and you know, yes, I
Speaker 1: have family and I have friends that are protectors, but
Speaker 1: ultimately my protection is divine and it comes from God.
Speaker 1: And really trusting that now and I didn't trust it before.
Speaker 1: And I think when you've gone through tragedy or trauma
Speaker 1: in any part of life, it really makes you. You know,
Speaker 1: they don't talk about how it really it challenges your
Speaker 1: relationship with God and it am I really being protected?
Speaker 1: Something really horrible has happened, and I really safe. Something
Speaker 1: horrible has happened. And you know, I'm learning that even
Speaker 1: now that I am protected, that it is okay to
Speaker 1: lean into that, to not have to always be around
Speaker 1: people or you know, not always feeling like I'm not
Speaker 1: protected if I'm alone, that I am totally in trust
Speaker 1: with God. That's a lesson I'm still learning today that
Speaker 1: I'm trying to just cultivate even more. Yeah, it's interesting,
Speaker 1: isn't it. How we've created this animosity with being alone.
Speaker 1: Like we think of being alone or lonely as such
Speaker 1: a negative thing, and it's almost been ingrained in our
Speaker 1: life since we were younger. It's like, if you were
Speaker 1: the kid at school who didn't have lots of friends,
Speaker 1: you were the loner. And if you got invited to
Speaker 1: a wedding and you didn't have a plus one, it
Speaker 1: was like, oh, what's wrong with you? And it's like
Speaker 1: we've always been told that you need a better half
Speaker 1: or someone to complete you. Like the language has always
Speaker 1: being being alone is a weakness, and that being alone
Speaker 1: means you've been abandoned. It's almost like we think being
Speaker 1: alone means abandonment, but that's not true. You can be
Speaker 1: happy alone and have great relationships and friends, but no
Speaker 1: way your shelter is. I want to hear about how
Speaker 1: long it takes you and what you have to go
Speaker 1: through to gain that trust that there's something beyond, because
Speaker 1: now when you're looking back, it obviously makes sense, but
Speaker 1: if you if you remember being in that position, the
Speaker 1: last thing you want to do is trust that there's
Speaker 1: something greater or deeper or more powerful, because you're like, well,
Speaker 1: I don't even have that trust in myself, you know,
Speaker 1: and we keep transferring our trust to humans, and so
Speaker 1: I just want to hear about some of the pain
Speaker 1: that comes with that, or some of the challenges that
Speaker 1: come with that, or some of that journey before you
Speaker 1: were able to be. When I see you now and
Speaker 1: I obviously we know each other, and I see you
Speaker 1: be so confident in that space, I kind of want
Speaker 1: to hear where that confidence came from. You know, For me, personally,
Speaker 1: I think it's all it's really based on the individual
Speaker 1: in someone's individual journey. For me personally, it was because
Speaker 1: I didn't have a choice, There was no other option
Speaker 1: that was taken away from me. Where I was in
Speaker 1: a house I wasn't alone. I was in a relationship,
Speaker 1: you know, I was protected and covered and then that
Speaker 1: was tragically taken away with the passing you know of
Speaker 1: my son's father that I was forced into. I am
Speaker 1: alone now? And who do you trust as far as yourself? God?
Speaker 1: What's that relationship like? When you don't have anything else
Speaker 1: to lean on and stand on, all you have is
Speaker 1: what you came here with, and so you and the
Speaker 1: divine And so I was kind of pushed into communication
Speaker 1: with God. I had to start really talking to God really,
Speaker 1: not just reading the books. And um, you know I
Speaker 1: always say, like applying it and reading it or two
Speaker 1: different things. You can read all the books everywhere, you
Speaker 1: can speak recite what you read in the book, but
Speaker 1: once you apply what you read, that's a different ball game.
Speaker 1: And so I had to learn application. Yeah, that's such
Speaker 1: a such a great point from communication and application. I
Speaker 1: think that's that's so powerful. Let's I've loved watching you
Speaker 1: be a mom. I've only ever known you in this
Speaker 1: this phase of your life, like I didn't know. I
Speaker 1: haven't known you before, and you have two incredible sons
Speaker 1: who are just so fun to be with. Calm is
Speaker 1: like the ultimate gentleman, and you know this this very
Speaker 1: like almost regal person. It's just like so well spoken,
Speaker 1: so gentle, so smart and intellectual as well, and then
Speaker 1: you have crossed. It's just like the cutest little being
Speaker 1: in the world and just has so much like spontaneous energy,
Speaker 1: has your humor, you know, that kind of vibe. And
Speaker 1: I see how much they love you and how much
Speaker 1: you love them, and that connection. It's so beautiful. Lauren.
Speaker 1: I'm asking you this probably for the first time. I've
Speaker 1: never asked you this before because I believe it's not
Speaker 1: an easy question to answer, But how does it feel
Speaker 1: to have a plan for life and have a picture
Speaker 1: of what life looks like and then have that picture
Speaker 1: being torn? Like? What does that actually feel like? Because
Speaker 1: I think that's something that we underestimate because not everyone
Speaker 1: goes through that fully, but the extent to which you've
Speaker 1: been through that, we may all get little pieces of that.
Speaker 1: And so I feel your experience can be a real
Speaker 1: blessing for everyone, and I know you can share it
Speaker 1: with that heart. So I'd love to ask you that
Speaker 1: question now. It is the ultimate lesson in control, not
Speaker 1: having control, letting go. It's really when you have this
Speaker 1: plan for your life as you should. We should manifest,
Speaker 1: we should set goals, you should right you have intentions
Speaker 1: and if or when that gets derailed and you have
Speaker 1: plan being now to go off that you didn't plan on.
Speaker 1: It is the ultimate test of surrender, letting it go,
Speaker 1: letting God now move in your life. You know, I
Speaker 1: think for me, it was I had this idea I had,
Speaker 1: we had the kids, we had a family, and the
Speaker 1: head of the household is not here anymore. Does that
Speaker 1: mean I have no purpose here anymore? No, I still
Speaker 1: have a purpose, I still have a mission, and now
Speaker 1: I have to tap into myself. You know, I had
Speaker 1: to surrender my idea of what I thought my life
Speaker 1: should be and give God and give my children the
Speaker 1: opportunity for a happy life. Give God my life so
Speaker 1: that now my life is what the divine wants for me,
Speaker 1: and so I flow with the river. I'm not holding
Speaker 1: onto the rocks, I'm not grasping onto things that you
Speaker 1: know you have to let go of. It is literally,
Speaker 1: the I'm gonna say again, the ultimate test of surrendering.
Speaker 1: You have to surrender because at the end of the day,
Speaker 1: as much control as we think we have, we do
Speaker 1: not and it's actually very powerful to surrender. We think
Speaker 1: that it's a weakness, but it's so much power in
Speaker 1: letting go and flowing with the river because life is
Speaker 1: gonna do what it's gonna do, and we are all
Speaker 1: gonna get chin checked by life one way or another.
Speaker 1: So I might as well focus on my enlightenment and
Speaker 1: roll with the river and not fight with the rocks. Wow,
Speaker 1: I mean, you know, hearing that from you, I hope
Speaker 1: that people are going to replay that themselves again and
Speaker 1: again and again because everything you just said and the
Speaker 1: fact that you're saying it in what you've experienced, that's
Speaker 1: what gives it so much power. Right, these are not
Speaker 1: just words, and these are not just ideas. It's not
Speaker 1: just a concept. It's like you're actually having to apply
Speaker 1: this in your daily life. Tell us about learn What
Speaker 1: is it that we didn't know about Nipsy and you
Speaker 1: and the connection you add? What is it that we
Speaker 1: didn't see that we didn't know that that people may
Speaker 1: not be aware of that you shared, that you learned
Speaker 1: from each other, that you grew from each other. What
Speaker 1: were the things you taught him and he taught you
Speaker 1: that made this so powerful? And you know, made this
Speaker 1: incredible unit that has continued to propel you to greater heights.
Speaker 1: You know. I always say that, like we were very
Speaker 1: avid readers, and so when we moved in together and
Speaker 1: put our books together, you can really see whose books
Speaker 1: were so like, he was very very he was an intellectual,
Speaker 1: and I always say he was like a spiritual intellectual
Speaker 1: and I was a spiritual emotional person. So all my
Speaker 1: books were like on hard and you know, and so
Speaker 1: to me it really represented masculine and feminine energy. I
Speaker 1: think something that people don't know is that we were
Speaker 1: always talking about how we could have a better relationship
Speaker 1: with God individually and our purpose and our missions in life,
Speaker 1: and you know who how we just wanted to be
Speaker 1: on purpose as individuals, and how we just helped each
Speaker 1: other on our own individual missions, and that our relationship
Speaker 1: was actually more spiritual than it was anything, and that
Speaker 1: we bonded on our you know, quest for the truth.
Speaker 1: That's I mean, what I love about hearing that is
Speaker 1: that anyone who is in a relationship right now or
Speaker 1: wants to be in a relationship is listening to us.
Speaker 1: That feels like such a great north star. Like that
Speaker 1: feels like such a beautiful point to connect. And it
Speaker 1: sounds so normal for you because that's what you both were,
Speaker 1: like you just described, but that's not very normal, as
Speaker 1: we both know, Like, that's not what relationships are based on. Like,
Speaker 1: that's not why we come together, it's not what we
Speaker 1: think about. It's not really what we put in the center.
Speaker 1: But that center feels so strong. Sorry, were you about
Speaker 1: to say something, Lauren? Didn't. I didn't want to cut
Speaker 1: you off. We started and we weren't perfect, and we
Speaker 1: definitely had our you know, it was a lot of
Speaker 1: human moments. But I think in relationship it's really important
Speaker 1: in the beginning if you set an attention what is
Speaker 1: what is our union? How is our union going to
Speaker 1: participate with everyone else? How are we going to contribute?
Speaker 1: How does our union contribute to people outside of us?
Speaker 1: Not just us, you know, not between you know, Oh
Speaker 1: you love me, give me pleasure. It has to be
Speaker 1: deeper than that, or it kind of fades away. So
Speaker 1: I think we're very intentional on like how us together,
Speaker 1: how does that contribute to our community? Yeah, and I
Speaker 1: think that community part is also again such a powerful
Speaker 1: point that it doesn't just stop at your quest for
Speaker 1: the truth it's what you both do in service to
Speaker 1: your community, and that's a space that you continue to
Speaker 1: be active in. Both you were both active in, Like
Speaker 1: that's such a big priority for you, and I think
Speaker 1: that that's another great relationship connection that you've spoken about
Speaker 1: there there is like if your relationship is based around
Speaker 1: the quest for the truth, not just pleasure, but then
Speaker 1: your relationship is based around community service and giving back,
Speaker 1: these are the things that really bring you close to
Speaker 1: someone that you that you deeply love and you share together.
Speaker 1: You spoke a bit about the masculine and feminine energy there,
Speaker 1: and I loved how you described yourself as the spiritual
Speaker 1: emotional and him as the spiritual intellectual. That's that's a
Speaker 1: really cool way of looking at it. When when you
Speaker 1: tell us a bit about what you've learned about the
Speaker 1: masculine and feminine energy that has helped you that you
Speaker 1: think our listeners may find an introduction if they're not
Speaker 1: as aware of those ideas. What if some of the
Speaker 1: things that you've taken away that you think it really
Speaker 1: helped you, you know, just being aware that we are
Speaker 1: all masculine and feminine energy. You know, you think it's
Speaker 1: just one way or the other, but that we have
Speaker 1: we're all intertwined, and we have that in us. I
Speaker 1: sometimes operate out of my masculine more than my feminine,
Speaker 1: you know, especially just I think I do more than anything,
Speaker 1: and and starting to open myself up to my feminine
Speaker 1: energy more and more, I've learned that. I think that
Speaker 1: was my That's my biggest takeaway really from that is
Speaker 1: that it is all in all of us, it's not
Speaker 1: one of the other, and that it is so okay
Speaker 1: to nurture both sides at the same time, or some
Speaker 1: are one side, you might nurture more than the other,
Speaker 1: and that's okay. I just you know, it's like the
Speaker 1: best of both worlds. Yeah, no, I agree with that.
Speaker 1: And I knowing which one to use when and knowing
Speaker 1: which one to nourishes such an important decision. And whereas
Speaker 1: if you just base it on gender and you say, well,
Speaker 1: I'm only feminine or masculine, whatever it may be, you
Speaker 1: almost miss out on recognizing that there are powers in
Speaker 1: both that are accessible to all of us all the time.
Speaker 1: I know for a fact, I remember meeting someone a
Speaker 1: few years ago, and I don't know if I ever
Speaker 1: told you, this, but I met someone a few years ago,
Speaker 1: and I don't really connect with him that much anymore either,
Speaker 1: But he said to me, he said, he goes, Jay,
Speaker 1: you are you are like completely balanced in your masculine
Speaker 1: and feminine. And I was, like I did when I
Speaker 1: first heard that. It was a while ago. I was,
Speaker 1: I don't know whether to take that as a compliment
Speaker 1: or as a disc and so but yeah, yeah, no,
Speaker 1: I learned that afterwards. You know, It's like my masculine
Speaker 1: ego got in the way of like, what are you
Speaker 1: trying to say? And it's creativity and intuition, and as
Speaker 1: spiritual beings, we just you know, yeah, you want to
Speaker 1: be tapped into that intuition and that create I'm glad
Speaker 1: you raised that actually that you know, feminine energy. Often
Speaker 1: we don't understand the depth of it, but creativity, intuition, connection, synergy,
Speaker 1: like all of this comes from that. And so that's
Speaker 1: a really great reminder. I heard you, Lauren in an interview.
Speaker 1: You mentioned that you almost made a decision to not
Speaker 1: go back to acting anymore, and I wanted to know
Speaker 1: more about that, because obviously you have gone back and
Speaker 1: you have moved forward, but there was a point where
Speaker 1: obviously that that required an act of bravery. Can you
Speaker 1: tell us what was it that was stopping you and
Speaker 1: then what helped you move back in? What was stopping
Speaker 1: me was that, you know, life change, and so my
Speaker 1: perspective on life change, and you know, I my field,
Speaker 1: the audition process and the rejection and the politics of
Speaker 1: you know what came with what I do did not
Speaker 1: align with what I was seeking anymore. I didn't want
Speaker 1: to have to politic I didn't want to have to,
Speaker 1: you know, do things. I felt more in alignment with
Speaker 1: my truth and I just wanted to be myself fully.
Speaker 1: If I could participate in a project wholly, I would
Speaker 1: do it. But if I could not, I didn't want
Speaker 1: to be fake and not give of myself in a
Speaker 1: real way. And so I was like, you know, I
Speaker 1: don't really want to run that race anymore. And so
Speaker 1: a project or without Remorse came and I was like,
Speaker 1: I'm not sure. I don't want to do this little
Speaker 1: you know what felt like a hamster wheel for me.
Speaker 1: I didn't like the idea of competition and going against
Speaker 1: I didn't like that, and so I was like, I
Speaker 1: don't know if I want to do that anymore. And
Speaker 1: so Michael was like look, just read the script. And
Speaker 1: so I read the script, and what drew me to
Speaker 1: was that I could participate authentically, like I can genuinely
Speaker 1: play this role, because I really resonated with the fact
Speaker 1: that she passes and he has all these visions of
Speaker 1: her and that she's still communicating with him, just not
Speaker 1: physically but spiritually. And that's exactly where I, you know,
Speaker 1: where I felt I was at the time, and so
Speaker 1: it was just perfect. It was in alignment with a
Speaker 1: story I wanted to tell. I could really give my
Speaker 1: truth to this and it didn't have that, it didn't
Speaker 1: have a negative energy on it. It felt it felt
Speaker 1: like so and I want to say easy, because it
Speaker 1: wasn't easy, but it felt like it was just pretty
Speaker 1: much in alignment, you know, such a flow and so
Speaker 1: and not that I'm expecting everything to be easy, but
Speaker 1: I didn't want a certain energy on it, and this
Speaker 1: had a really good energy on it, and I trusted
Speaker 1: it and went back. Yeah, And I really felt that
Speaker 1: when me and Radie watched the movie together that we
Speaker 1: really felt that too, that you know, looking at it
Speaker 1: from that perspective of of knowing you and speaking to
Speaker 1: you about it, and then watching the movie and just
Speaker 1: being like wow, like you know, how how must have
Speaker 1: that been for Loren to play that role. But but
Speaker 1: then to hear you say what you're saying to me now,
Speaker 1: I'm just like wow, like that that's therapeutic, it's healing,
Speaker 1: it's it's powerful because you're you're transferring that pain into purpose, right,
Speaker 1: You're like bringing it through and you're letting it flow.
Speaker 1: And that that's so powerful that you're able to transform
Speaker 1: your pain in this way, and that feels like a
Speaker 1: massively worthy reason to go back to anything and how
Speaker 1: you're selecting it. And I love what you said there.
Speaker 1: I think you know, I just I like pointing out
Speaker 1: things that sometimes we miss. You said, I'm not expecting
Speaker 1: it to be easy, but I want it to be
Speaker 1: an alignment. And I think that is such a powerful
Speaker 1: lesson for all of us that if we're looking for ease,
Speaker 1: chances are we don't want to do anything because nothing's easy.
Speaker 1: But yeah, but it's like that alignment. And you've devoted
Speaker 1: time in helping other people who've lost their loved ones
Speaker 1: through gun violence. Can you walk us through how this
Speaker 1: has been helping you in your healing journey and why
Speaker 1: it's important for people to help even when we feel
Speaker 1: like we've lost because I think what often happen is
Speaker 1: when we feel like we've gone through something, we most
Speaker 1: often don't feel like we're in a position to help.
Speaker 1: But when you've actually going out done that, can you
Speaker 1: tell us how that has actually helped healing or support?
Speaker 1: What have you learned from that? You know? I think
Speaker 1: personally that service is our purpose and that we do
Speaker 1: it in different ways. I went to New York and
Speaker 1: I worked with an organization called Life Camp where they helped,
Speaker 1: you know, victims of gun violence and they try to
Speaker 1: stop gun violence. And a woman by the name of Erica,
Speaker 1: who was amazing runs this organization. It made it also
Speaker 1: made I saw. It also made me not feel so
Speaker 1: alone and that how close we are as humans and
Speaker 1: how connected we are. And we feel like our individual
Speaker 1: stories are the things that make us so separate, but
Speaker 1: it's actually a thing that really connects us, and that
Speaker 1: as I was talking to these young women and these
Speaker 1: single mothers that were younger than me, I got so
Speaker 1: much strength from them because so much so many times
Speaker 1: we think what we go through was just us and
Speaker 1: how did this happen to me? And It's not the
Speaker 1: way to think like that. It's like, who am I?
Speaker 1: Why not me? Why is this not happening to me?
Speaker 1: It's happening all around the world. How can I be
Speaker 1: of service? How can my story help someone else through
Speaker 1: their stories? So many times I read a book or
Speaker 1: listen to someone's testimony and they have no idea how
Speaker 1: encouraging that is for me at that time, And so
Speaker 1: I just want my I don't want to have I
Speaker 1: don't want to have my pain in vain. I would
Speaker 1: like to give my pain some purpose and transmute the
Speaker 1: pain into purpose. And if I could help or encourage
Speaker 1: or motivate or pull through, I will sign up for
Speaker 1: that every day, all the time. That's beautiful. I'm so
Speaker 1: glad you said that, because again, it just comes back
Speaker 1: to the same thing that we don't want people. I
Speaker 1: think it's those times when you feel you have nothing
Speaker 1: to give. Is when by giving you have so much
Speaker 1: to gain. Right. It's like when you feel you have
Speaker 1: nothing to give, but but in that moment when you
Speaker 1: choose to give, when you actually feel like you have
Speaker 1: nothing to give, you get so much back from it.
Speaker 1: And I feel like if you sposed to give, right,
Speaker 1: isn't that. Isn't that when you're supposed to give when
Speaker 1: you feel like, you know, when you're really depressed, when
Speaker 1: you're really they say, when you're really down, do go
Speaker 1: do something for someone else. Step outside of yourself and
Speaker 1: go do something for someone else. Yeah, yeah, absolutely, And
Speaker 1: I think if if we can all find daily, weekly,
Speaker 1: monthly ways of doing that by working with organizations that
Speaker 1: are important to us. And I think this is one
Speaker 1: of the things that I've noticed too as well. When
Speaker 1: we look around in the world, there's so much pain,
Speaker 1: and there's so much stress and pressure, and it's overwhelming.
Speaker 1: But if you just go and do one tiny act
Speaker 1: of service in your local area and your local community,
Speaker 1: you don't have to go and change the world. You
Speaker 1: don't have to go and like raise lots of money
Speaker 1: or do this like big thing. You can do this
Speaker 1: really small thing every week. And not only is that
Speaker 1: going to improve the world, of course, it's improving the world,
Speaker 1: it's going to change someone's life. It's going to change
Speaker 1: yours too, And I think we underestimate what it feels
Speaker 1: like to change one person's life. And I always think about, like,
Speaker 1: if you add the option of when we're like Oh,
Speaker 1: but that only helps three people. If you think about
Speaker 1: those three people and their life experience, I'm sure you
Speaker 1: would a thousand percent shoes to change their experience. And
Speaker 1: I think we we've got lost this. We've got lost
Speaker 1: in this world now of like numbers and millions of
Speaker 1: dollars and big change, and we forget that the community
Speaker 1: is changed, Like that is the world? Does that make sense?
Speaker 1: It's right, it's hot, it's right where you stare, you know,
Speaker 1: I don't think it's the small things that you go
Speaker 1: up to a big thing. And the big thing is service,
Speaker 1: you know, like it's integrity, like are you gonna do
Speaker 1: this when no one is watching? Absolutely? You know, am
Speaker 1: I gonna make it? It's also like I'm very intentional
Speaker 1: on my day. So if I know I'm gonna be
Speaker 1: working around a lot of people, my intention is that
Speaker 1: you know, I represent God, that I don't give someone,
Speaker 1: I don't put my stuff on someone else, that I
Speaker 1: bring good energy to a set that you know, if
Speaker 1: someone's having a hard day, I don't have to try
Speaker 1: to make them better, but I can just represent, you know,
Speaker 1: some goodness you know, and some truth. And so I
Speaker 1: think it's important also to set intentions when you're around
Speaker 1: a lot of people. I remember you telling me that
Speaker 1: when you're on set, you like choose your own playlist
Speaker 1: to make sure the energy is right and the vibes right,
Speaker 1: and like, you know, I think that I get on
Speaker 1: that and that trailer and I play my little Jazz
Speaker 1: or my self care playlists for my instanse sage. I
Speaker 1: pray I just put myself in a space because I
Speaker 1: don't want to be influenced by my environment. I want
Speaker 1: the environment to be influenced by me. Absolutely, well said,
Speaker 1: Well said Lauren. I want to hear about We spoke
Speaker 1: about this earlier briefly, but I want to dive into
Speaker 1: it being a mother, you know, and we spoke about
Speaker 1: Cameron Cross, who you know, I've enjoyed spending the time
Speaker 1: that I have with them. Tell us about what you've
Speaker 1: been trying to share with them, what lessons, what guidance
Speaker 1: you've been trying to pass on to them, but also
Speaker 1: what have you learned from both of them in your
Speaker 1: own life too, Like what have you taken from them?
Speaker 1: Where have they taught you? Because I know they have.
Speaker 1: I think I've learned from them more than they'll ever
Speaker 1: be able to learn from me. They're really they're really
Speaker 1: resilient and like unc they love me regardless of what
Speaker 1: I see in myself sometimes and when I'm down. You know,
Speaker 1: Cameron heart has a really big heart. And when I
Speaker 1: was his age, I closed my heart up because there
Speaker 1: was a lot of trauma around me and I didn't
Speaker 1: I used to think that vulnerability was weakness. And I
Speaker 1: realized how easy it is for him to be vulnerable,
Speaker 1: and how easy it is for him to share his
Speaker 1: heart and his feelings, and how strong and brave that is.
Speaker 1: And so a lot of times I'll be in a
Speaker 1: situation and I would even say, like what would Cam do?
Speaker 1: Because it's intention so pure and heartfelt, and his compassion,
Speaker 1: you know, and crosses very and I learned from him
Speaker 1: his freedom of being himself, total freedom. He is fearless.
Speaker 1: He's like, I got this. If I don't get got
Speaker 1: it right now, I'm gonna get it. You know. I
Speaker 1: didn't have siblings growing up, so watching siblings that love
Speaker 1: is like, h I hope if I ever come back
Speaker 1: that I get to have a sibling that I grew
Speaker 1: up in the house with, because it's beautiful. It's like
Speaker 1: they're a part of each other in a way, and
Speaker 1: I personally liked in stealing my kids integrity, honor, honesty.
Speaker 1: You know you're getting big trouble for lying in this
Speaker 1: household and acceptance of yourself fully. You know, I've been
Speaker 1: really big on like you know, Cam had a test
Speaker 1: today he was really nervous about and I'm like, look,
Speaker 1: if you don't ace the test, you don't ace the test.
Speaker 1: Did you try your best? Yes? Did we study? Yes?
Speaker 1: You don't have to ace it. You have to show
Speaker 1: up and show out. And that's it. The result of that,
Speaker 1: it's in the universe. And sometimes we don't get the
Speaker 1: result of our you know, actions right away. So just
Speaker 1: make sure you put your best foot forward. And just
Speaker 1: I teach them a lot about God and how there's
Speaker 1: a karma check book, so just to make sure you're
Speaker 1: always putting good pennies in your karma bank. And I'm
Speaker 1: always like you, there's always an opportunity you have good karma,
Speaker 1: so make sure you pay attention to all your opportunities around.
Speaker 1: I love what you mentioned there one thing around the
Speaker 1: idea of you don't always get the reward for the
Speaker 1: hard work and that activity in that moment, and I
Speaker 1: think that is such a powerful thing to teach a
Speaker 1: young person because we always think, like, for example, I
Speaker 1: study for this test, but I didn't get the results,
Speaker 1: so that study was useless, and we don't realize that
Speaker 1: that study maybe really powerful, like five ten years down
Speaker 1: the line, when you remember that one piece of insight
Speaker 1: and it actually gets a win, And that is such
Speaker 1: a powerful, powerful thing to teach someone that the immediate
Speaker 1: result is not how powerful that input was, Like, the
Speaker 1: immediate result is not how powerful your effort was in
Speaker 1: that situation. You're going to get to see that for many,
Speaker 1: many years, not at all. I'm just I'm just listening.
Speaker 1: I'm just trying to listen to you really attentively, because
Speaker 1: I feel like there's so many things that you've worked
Speaker 1: on and you've practiced that have become so normal for you.
Speaker 1: And when I'm listening to I'm like, Wow, that's actually
Speaker 1: really profound, Like that's a really powerful point. And the
Speaker 1: fact that you're thinking about teaching that to your kids,
Speaker 1: like it's you're not just saying, oh, it doesn't matter
Speaker 1: if you don't use the test. What you're actually saying
Speaker 1: is it doesn't matter if you used the test, because
Speaker 1: what you learned is going to help you at some point.
Speaker 1: And I want you to see that. I want you
Speaker 1: to recognize that you studied and that's going to support
Speaker 1: you in more ways than this test. This test is,
Speaker 1: this test is not the proof that you studied. And now, yeah,
Speaker 1: and that is the that's it. Yeah, Yeah, that's really beautiful.
Speaker 1: I love hearing that. And tell tell us about as
Speaker 1: you continue to move on. Now, what are the things
Speaker 1: Lauren now at this stage in your life? You know,
Speaker 1: you've done so much service, You've worked for the community,
Speaker 1: you're embedded you, you're supporting all those people are supporting you.
Speaker 1: What are the things that excite you now? Like? Where
Speaker 1: is it? Where are you now? What brings joy to Lauren? Now?
Speaker 1: I really like creating content that I feel is inspirational
Speaker 1: or motivation. Motivation that really excites me. I've been working
Speaker 1: on a couple lines with Puma with clothes and just
Speaker 1: intention behind that, Like I don't want to just put
Speaker 1: out the clothes. What is it? What are the clothes saying?
Speaker 1: How are the clothes going to make someone feel? What
Speaker 1: intention are you putting behind the clothes? And you know, honestly,
Speaker 1: really simple things like Sundays, I love doing you know,
Speaker 1: devotional service on Sundays and learning more about that and
Speaker 1: applying that. But also just like chilling and watching TV
Speaker 1: with my kids. You know, like I used to think
Speaker 1: it was these massive things that brought me joy, and
Speaker 1: so I would always seek those really big things. And
Speaker 1: really it's like a really comfortable room with the kids
Speaker 1: and they're listening to them laugh or listening to them
Speaker 1: play together, and you know, clean socks and fresh sheets
Speaker 1: like those things bring me big joy. And you know,
Speaker 1: hanging with friends and listening to music, just those things
Speaker 1: and creating things that come from my heart. Definitely. Yeah,
Speaker 1: big shout out to your I say Puma back in England,
Speaker 1: but I know it's Puma out here. We say Puma
Speaker 1: really yeah, we see every time I say Puma, I
Speaker 1: just feel so it just I'm like wow, like that,
Speaker 1: so it's so for my mind. It's crazy, but yeah,
Speaker 1: we call it Puma back in England. But but Puma. Yeah,
Speaker 1: the forever stronger line me and rather a big rather
Speaker 1: a big fans. And it's always nice to wear something
Speaker 1: that means something and that represents something for you. And yeah,
Speaker 1: I love that you're bringing that into fashion and places
Speaker 1: like that to have that meaningfulness and that presence and
Speaker 1: that power. And you know, one thing I remember we
Speaker 1: spoke about which I really appreciate from you, and you
Speaker 1: even mentioned it today where you're like, I wanted to
Speaker 1: let go of that competition in the industry and that comparison.
Speaker 1: Walk us through how you've worked through that, because this
Speaker 1: isn't something that only you experience. It's actually what's been
Speaker 1: created by most industries where people are put against each other,
Speaker 1: people are made to compete for things. You're made to
Speaker 1: believe there's only one spot, there's only one thing, and
Speaker 1: if you get it, then you're losing and you're winning.
Speaker 1: How have you worked through that personally? How have you
Speaker 1: been trying to apply wisdom around that area of your life,
Speaker 1: around comparison and competition that I think we all struggle with. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you know, I remember hearing something Reverend Michael said about
Speaker 1: being in the spirit of celebration. So when something really
Speaker 1: good happens to someone else celebrating, because when you're in
Speaker 1: that spirit of celebration, you're just giving out messages to
Speaker 1: the universe that you like to celebrate, So then the
Speaker 1: universe gives you things to celebrate. So I celebrate everyone's wins.
Speaker 1: You know, I've never I've never really been in envious.
Speaker 1: I never really carry that energy, even young. So that's
Speaker 1: why it always feels funny when it's around me. So like,
Speaker 1: I celebrate everyone's wins because I know that that that
Speaker 1: is that's mine too. It's just the energy of celebration
Speaker 1: and genuinely knowing that there's enough to go around. That
Speaker 1: we live in an abundant universe. So just because someone
Speaker 1: is eating doesn't mean that I don't have food on
Speaker 1: the way. Doesn't mean I can't eat either. It's just
Speaker 1: that there's an abundance of it all. So I just
Speaker 1: celebrate everyone's you know, wins, and you know, congratulate and
Speaker 1: send really good energy out to especially you know, women
Speaker 1: and black women like myself that are doing this is
Speaker 1: not easy. I just am like a I love women,
Speaker 1: So I'm like a woman like I love women winning,
Speaker 1: and I just sit in the spirit of abundance and celebration. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I think when we start realizing that actually, when people
Speaker 1: in our space win, the space wins, and so it's
Speaker 1: not like you know, it's when you make it about
Speaker 1: one versus one, it can feel like a loss. But
Speaker 1: when you see it as a community, an industry, a
Speaker 1: space within an industry. When it's winning, that means everyone's winning.
Speaker 1: I always think about it like, you know, if you
Speaker 1: look at it through house prices, it's like if someone
Speaker 1: on your street sells the house for a lot of money,
Speaker 1: everyone's prices just went up, Like everyone on that street
Speaker 1: just benefited. But you can look at that and be like, oh,
Speaker 1: but they just made loads of money and so no
Speaker 1: one's gonna buy my house. But it's like, actually, that's
Speaker 1: not true. The whole value of the whole street just increased.
Speaker 1: Right in that competition. You know, mind frame, you're just
Speaker 1: blocking all the beautiful things God has for you, you know,
Speaker 1: if you know, you just That's why you're supposed to
Speaker 1: celebrate people when they succeeded at something or accomplish something,
Speaker 1: because you just open your world for more to celebrate.
Speaker 1: So I'm not blocking my blessings. I like all my blessings,
Speaker 1: so I love everyone's blessings absolutely. I love that learn
Speaker 1: We end every Own Purpose episode with the final five,
Speaker 1: So these questions have to be answered with one word
Speaker 1: or one sentence maximum, So you can have one sentence.
Speaker 1: Let's do Lauren London. These are your final five. Question
Speaker 1: Number one, what is the best advice you've ever received?
Speaker 1: What you give out to the world? You key, Oh,
Speaker 1: I like that. I like that. That's good. We've never
Speaker 1: had that. I like that. That's good advice. What is
Speaker 1: the worst advice you've ever received or the worst thing
Speaker 1: anyone's ever said to you? Someone making someone like your possession,
Speaker 1: like you have to keep them, or don't do this,
Speaker 1: or you're gonna lose them. That's really bad advice. Yes, good, good,
Speaker 1: good advice on the bad advice? All right? Question number three,
Speaker 1: what how would you define your current purpose in life?
Speaker 1: Transmuting pain into purpose? Beautiful? I love that. Question number four,
Speaker 1: what is something that you used to value that you
Speaker 1: don't value anymore? Close? I love that. I love it designers,
Speaker 1: clothes and stuff. Love appreciate them, but I don't all right.
Speaker 1: Fifth and final question, If you could make one law
Speaker 1: that everyone in the world had to follow, what would
Speaker 1: it be. I feel like there will be stricter punishment
Speaker 1: and longer harsher punishment on child abusers. Wow, So hopefully
Speaker 1: to hopefully limit people from doing it to Yeah, And
Speaker 1: are the punishment of people that harm children would be
Speaker 1: you know. I know it's not so spiritual at me,
Speaker 1: but it'd be harsh, harsh, harsh harsh. Yeah, thank you, Lauren. Lauren,
Speaker 1: is there anything that I haven't asked you but it's
Speaker 1: in your heart, on your mind, and your soul that
Speaker 1: you want to share with our own purpose community today?
Speaker 1: You've been so generous and kind with your time. Me
Speaker 1: and RADI adore you. This has been such a powerful conversation. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Is there anything that's on your heart, on mind or
Speaker 1: soul that you want to share that I haven't. I
Speaker 1: feel like you've asked me really good questions and really questions.
Speaker 1: I just you know, I'm just honored that I anyone
Speaker 1: would want to listen to me for real. So I'm
Speaker 1: just grateful to me here. Lauren. We love you. Everyone
Speaker 1: who's been listening or watching, make sure that you tag
Speaker 1: Lauren and I on Instagram, on Twitter, wherever you're using
Speaker 1: social media, because I love seeing and I love my
Speaker 1: guest to see what resonated with you, what connected with you.
Speaker 1: I love bringing you into the conversation so that we
Speaker 1: can notice what really left a mark on you and
Speaker 1: impacted you. So make sure you tag us both on
Speaker 1: Instagram and Twitter. Lauren, I want to thank you from
Speaker 1: the bottom of my heart for your time. I can't
Speaker 1: wait to see you again in this new year. Give
Speaker 1: Cam and Cross a big hug from me and we
Speaker 1: look forward to seeing you very soon. Thank you so much,
Speaker 1: thank you. Please give my hug to Ron will Well.
Speaker 1: Thanks Lauren, Bye guys. By N