1 00:00:08,680 --> 00:00:11,320 Speaker 1: My guest today is Emmy award winning talk show hosts, 2 00:00:11,440 --> 00:00:14,520 Speaker 1: New York Times best selling author and host of The 3 00:00:14,560 --> 00:00:20,079 Speaker 1: Tamaron Hall Show, Tamern Hall. Hello, Hello, beautiful, Oh my goodness, 4 00:00:20,120 --> 00:00:21,640 Speaker 1: I'm good. I'm so happy to see you. 5 00:00:22,040 --> 00:00:24,400 Speaker 2: I am so happy to see you. I haven't seen you. 6 00:00:24,880 --> 00:00:27,080 Speaker 2: It's been two weeks, but it feels like two years. 7 00:00:27,560 --> 00:00:30,240 Speaker 2: The last time, we were sitting at the bar looking 8 00:00:30,320 --> 00:00:33,560 Speaker 2: like a was it looking for mister Goodbar? Remember that movie? 9 00:00:33,960 --> 00:00:35,559 Speaker 1: No I'm older than Okay, No, I don't know that. 10 00:00:35,600 --> 00:00:36,800 Speaker 1: I was going to pretend for a second. 11 00:00:36,840 --> 00:00:38,839 Speaker 2: I was like, we were brown girls Sex in the 12 00:00:38,880 --> 00:00:39,520 Speaker 2: City version. 13 00:00:39,640 --> 00:00:40,440 Speaker 1: It was giving that. 14 00:00:40,600 --> 00:00:42,479 Speaker 2: It was giving sex in the city. We were at 15 00:00:42,640 --> 00:00:43,559 Speaker 2: what was it Rafts? 16 00:00:43,760 --> 00:00:45,960 Speaker 1: We were at Rafts. Yes, and it's such a cute, 17 00:00:45,960 --> 00:00:48,960 Speaker 1: little intimate spot. I end up having dinner there two days, lady, Yes, 18 00:00:49,040 --> 00:00:53,640 Speaker 1: and it was as good as I remember. But you 19 00:00:53,680 --> 00:00:55,680 Speaker 1: know what, I love to eat out. That's my main problem. 20 00:00:55,720 --> 00:01:02,240 Speaker 2: Really do you cook it all? I mean, okay, I'm. 21 00:01:00,360 --> 00:01:02,280 Speaker 1: Over here, like, oh my goodness, I'm getting to interview 22 00:01:02,280 --> 00:01:02,920 Speaker 1: Tammern Hall. 23 00:01:03,160 --> 00:01:03,680 Speaker 2: So nervous. 24 00:01:03,680 --> 00:01:05,040 Speaker 1: We're switching rolls today. 25 00:01:05,640 --> 00:01:08,399 Speaker 2: We're super nervy. Are you nerve for too well, my 26 00:01:08,520 --> 00:01:12,200 Speaker 2: son Moses is here, but yes, today they're out of school. Yes, 27 00:01:12,360 --> 00:01:16,400 Speaker 2: and my childcare situation crumbled, like my relaxer my hair 28 00:01:16,480 --> 00:01:20,560 Speaker 2: right now, your looks grand because it's a monsoon outside. 29 00:01:20,560 --> 00:01:21,520 Speaker 1: It's crazy outside. 30 00:01:21,600 --> 00:01:23,080 Speaker 2: And then I said, oh, I'm gonna put on some 31 00:01:23,200 --> 00:01:26,520 Speaker 2: jeans and this cool jacket. And I love vintage shopping. 32 00:01:26,560 --> 00:01:28,080 Speaker 2: And I have these jeans that I bought. They're from 33 00:01:28,160 --> 00:01:30,840 Speaker 2: nineteen seventies, nineteen seventy Levi's I buy a lot from 34 00:01:30,840 --> 00:01:32,800 Speaker 2: the seventies. That was the year I was born. And 35 00:01:32,959 --> 00:01:35,759 Speaker 2: I don't know, like three four weeks ago they fit 36 00:01:36,400 --> 00:01:38,960 Speaker 2: And today it's like the Beyonce song. If you don't 37 00:01:39,040 --> 00:01:41,080 Speaker 2: jump to put your jeans on, you don't feel my pain. 38 00:01:41,560 --> 00:01:43,080 Speaker 2: So I'm slightly leaned back. 39 00:01:43,120 --> 00:01:45,080 Speaker 1: I see how you're doing a little subject to slip 40 00:01:45,160 --> 00:01:47,200 Speaker 1: the way and listen. If you decide to unbutton that 41 00:01:47,240 --> 00:01:48,160 Speaker 1: top button. 42 00:01:48,040 --> 00:01:50,640 Speaker 2: I may not make the decision. The button may decide, 43 00:01:50,760 --> 00:01:53,840 Speaker 2: and then your poor team over here, somebody might lose 44 00:01:53,840 --> 00:01:56,240 Speaker 2: an eye. So I hope you have insurance because it's 45 00:01:56,280 --> 00:01:56,840 Speaker 2: going down. 46 00:01:56,920 --> 00:01:59,680 Speaker 1: Okay, listen, I think they have insurance. If they don't 47 00:01:59,720 --> 00:02:03,880 Speaker 1: just run, just run through the door by, change your name, 48 00:02:04,000 --> 00:02:06,360 Speaker 1: change the name of the show, everything. And I the 49 00:02:06,400 --> 00:02:08,440 Speaker 1: other day, getting in the car on my way to 50 00:02:08,680 --> 00:02:11,920 Speaker 1: a dinner, my button popped on my blazer. But it 51 00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:14,320 Speaker 1: was a blazer that's just like it's one button and 52 00:02:14,360 --> 00:02:17,320 Speaker 1: it's giving snatch. But I was in Paris for like 53 00:02:17,400 --> 00:02:19,520 Speaker 1: two weeks and I just had just come back the 54 00:02:19,560 --> 00:02:22,000 Speaker 1: day of kind of living a fabulous. 55 00:02:22,240 --> 00:02:25,480 Speaker 2: I was my button popped, and you know, I mean no, 56 00:02:25,560 --> 00:02:28,400 Speaker 2: I wasn't in you know, Queens when it happened. I 57 00:02:28,480 --> 00:02:31,200 Speaker 2: was in Paris. If your button's gonna pop off anywhere, 58 00:02:31,919 --> 00:02:32,880 Speaker 2: I would prefer. 59 00:02:32,680 --> 00:02:34,320 Speaker 1: To be in Paris. But the thing is it popped 60 00:02:34,360 --> 00:02:35,720 Speaker 1: in New York. It did pop in New York. I 61 00:02:35,720 --> 00:02:37,800 Speaker 1: had just come back from Paris, where I was indulging. 62 00:02:37,880 --> 00:02:40,079 Speaker 1: I was eating anything I could put my eyes on, 63 00:02:40,480 --> 00:02:44,560 Speaker 1: any and everything. Oh okay, hold on my favorite thing 64 00:02:44,639 --> 00:02:47,280 Speaker 1: that I ate in Paris, Dan Dan noodles from this 65 00:02:47,480 --> 00:02:51,000 Speaker 1: chef Keith, who was doing a residency at this restaurant. 66 00:02:51,040 --> 00:02:53,680 Speaker 1: He lives in Toronto. But they like host rotating chefs 67 00:02:53,680 --> 00:02:56,400 Speaker 1: really and I was hesitant to do the Dan Dan 68 00:02:56,400 --> 00:02:58,679 Speaker 1: noodles because I like them, but I don't always like them. 69 00:02:58,720 --> 00:03:01,120 Speaker 1: And he insisted, and I was like okay, and then 70 00:03:01,160 --> 00:03:02,560 Speaker 1: he was like, we can give you a half portion. 71 00:03:02,680 --> 00:03:04,239 Speaker 1: We do half portions, and I was like, yeah, let's 72 00:03:04,240 --> 00:03:05,359 Speaker 1: do the half portion because I'm not sure. 73 00:03:06,280 --> 00:03:08,200 Speaker 2: And then you so mad as hell. 74 00:03:10,040 --> 00:03:10,240 Speaker 3: You know. 75 00:03:10,320 --> 00:03:13,720 Speaker 2: I have experienced that where I just went to Kabawa, 76 00:03:13,919 --> 00:03:16,480 Speaker 2: which is on the Lower East Side of New York, 77 00:03:16,960 --> 00:03:19,120 Speaker 2: and the chef is really celebrated right now. It's part 78 00:03:19,120 --> 00:03:21,200 Speaker 2: of the Momofuku chain, but it's like their first thing, 79 00:03:21,520 --> 00:03:27,760 Speaker 2: and he's done a Caribbean influence menu there and goat 80 00:03:27,840 --> 00:03:30,600 Speaker 2: is one of my favorite things to eat. Mind really, 81 00:03:31,320 --> 00:03:33,079 Speaker 2: I had no idea it's one of my favorite things. 82 00:03:33,360 --> 00:03:36,120 Speaker 2: And he has a curry goat with this amazing rote. 83 00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:38,400 Speaker 2: It's all elevated. You know. He had one of the 84 00:03:38,480 --> 00:03:42,120 Speaker 2: most successful restaurants in Sydney, Australia, the chef Paul Carmichael, 85 00:03:42,400 --> 00:03:44,000 Speaker 2: and now he's here in New York and he had 86 00:03:44,040 --> 00:03:46,120 Speaker 2: this goat and it was like this little bit and 87 00:03:46,160 --> 00:03:49,000 Speaker 2: I wanted to like some more. 88 00:03:50,080 --> 00:03:51,200 Speaker 1: I think a little bit more. 89 00:03:51,600 --> 00:03:53,040 Speaker 2: Nothing works and you're like, oh, I don't think I'm 90 00:03:53,040 --> 00:03:53,480 Speaker 2: gonna like. 91 00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:55,920 Speaker 1: It, and you're like, I love it and I need it. 92 00:03:56,000 --> 00:03:57,920 Speaker 2: No, I have food dreams, right, do you get that? 93 00:03:58,000 --> 00:03:59,280 Speaker 1: Like, oh yeah, I'll. 94 00:03:59,080 --> 00:04:02,760 Speaker 2: Leave and and that I will dream about the meal 95 00:04:03,040 --> 00:04:06,000 Speaker 2: that I had and it's just like insatiable and I 96 00:04:06,360 --> 00:04:07,040 Speaker 2: need it again. 97 00:04:08,480 --> 00:04:11,560 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I wait, but okay, So I'm always looking 98 00:04:11,560 --> 00:04:13,800 Speaker 1: at menus. I'm always planning my next meal. On the 99 00:04:13,800 --> 00:04:15,640 Speaker 1: way here today, I was like, so when I'm up 100 00:04:15,720 --> 00:04:17,480 Speaker 1: in the area of the studio, what will I eat? 101 00:04:17,480 --> 00:04:19,240 Speaker 1: Because I'm like, oh, a new area. I don't usually 102 00:04:19,240 --> 00:04:21,680 Speaker 1: hang out up here. I was like on Google, like, 103 00:04:21,800 --> 00:04:22,880 Speaker 1: what's up there to eat? 104 00:04:22,920 --> 00:04:26,359 Speaker 2: That? That's just interesting. You say that. My cousin Erica, 105 00:04:26,400 --> 00:04:28,560 Speaker 2: she's like my sister. She happens to be an only child. 106 00:04:28,560 --> 00:04:31,839 Speaker 2: We're cousins, but we're very much like sisters. And she 107 00:04:32,720 --> 00:04:36,400 Speaker 2: will look at the menu before we go to the restaurant, 108 00:04:36,720 --> 00:04:40,440 Speaker 2: and she'll decide before we go in the restaurant what 109 00:04:40,640 --> 00:04:41,599 Speaker 2: she's going to eat. 110 00:04:41,640 --> 00:04:46,160 Speaker 1: You know, that's wild. I just I want every meal 111 00:04:46,240 --> 00:04:48,640 Speaker 1: I have to be amazing. And so I am a 112 00:04:48,760 --> 00:04:53,920 Speaker 1: kind of similar and like cross referencing reviews. Is that's 113 00:04:53,920 --> 00:04:55,760 Speaker 1: what I do in my free time. It's not scrolling 114 00:04:55,839 --> 00:04:58,440 Speaker 1: social media. It's looking at food and looking up food. 115 00:04:58,520 --> 00:05:02,159 Speaker 2: I find that to be so for me. I like 116 00:05:02,400 --> 00:05:05,400 Speaker 2: the mystery. I like the idea of wondering what's on 117 00:05:05,440 --> 00:05:07,880 Speaker 2: the menu. I no, no, I don't read the Yelp 118 00:05:07,920 --> 00:05:10,480 Speaker 2: reviews or anything because I always figure they're paid for anyway. 119 00:05:10,520 --> 00:05:12,680 Speaker 1: I'm okay, well, you know, I think the Google ones, 120 00:05:12,720 --> 00:05:14,320 Speaker 1: I think the Google ones are paid for. So I 121 00:05:14,360 --> 00:05:16,200 Speaker 1: just want to say that I think Google Google has 122 00:05:16,200 --> 00:05:19,279 Speaker 1: been infiltrated by the FEDS or something like. I'm like, 123 00:05:19,480 --> 00:05:22,760 Speaker 1: these are not real reviews. This is your friends and families. Yeah, 124 00:05:22,800 --> 00:05:25,080 Speaker 1: the ops are on Google. I'm leading you astray. 125 00:05:25,279 --> 00:05:28,840 Speaker 2: See, I am suspicious. I am specious of reviews in general. 126 00:05:28,920 --> 00:05:29,200 Speaker 1: Okay. 127 00:05:29,560 --> 00:05:32,120 Speaker 2: I don't even do the Rotten Tomatoes. My husband he's like, oh, 128 00:05:32,200 --> 00:05:37,080 Speaker 2: rotten tomatoes, and like, I don't know, I can't subscribe. 129 00:05:37,160 --> 00:05:39,760 Speaker 2: I need to feel it. Yeah, there was a movie recently. 130 00:05:39,760 --> 00:05:42,000 Speaker 2: I won't name the movie, but it got you know, 131 00:05:42,120 --> 00:05:45,040 Speaker 2: really paan and I thought, I'm not listening to these people, 132 00:05:45,520 --> 00:05:47,400 Speaker 2: and then I saw them were like, I'm listening to 133 00:05:47,480 --> 00:05:50,360 Speaker 2: these people. Sometimes I go back and forth with it. 134 00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:53,039 Speaker 2: The restaurants. I tend to think I need to get 135 00:05:53,040 --> 00:05:56,120 Speaker 2: in there myself, especially you know we're in New York City. Yeah, 136 00:05:56,160 --> 00:05:59,480 Speaker 2: this is the town of the spin right, and so 137 00:05:59,600 --> 00:06:03,320 Speaker 2: I always worried about, well, that chef or that restaurant 138 00:06:03,360 --> 00:06:06,680 Speaker 2: group might be connected. And then they get the great 139 00:06:06,720 --> 00:06:09,359 Speaker 2: review and I go in, and a whole two hundred 140 00:06:09,360 --> 00:06:13,599 Speaker 2: dollars later, I'm leaving hungry, mad, broke, pissed off. You know. 141 00:06:14,800 --> 00:06:16,760 Speaker 1: Well, listen, that's why I have a hit list of 142 00:06:16,880 --> 00:06:21,120 Speaker 1: people that I am going to. That's Moses. I don't 143 00:06:21,120 --> 00:06:23,359 Speaker 1: even know if it was I think Moses, I feel, 144 00:06:23,400 --> 00:06:24,640 Speaker 1: you know, I don't want to blame him. 145 00:06:24,800 --> 00:06:28,919 Speaker 2: Well, he's over there playing Monopoly digital Monopoly, okay, oh no, 146 00:06:29,320 --> 00:06:32,080 Speaker 2: listen in our home. He I don't know what this 147 00:06:32,200 --> 00:06:34,160 Speaker 2: kid's going to be when he grows up, but he is. 148 00:06:34,720 --> 00:06:37,080 Speaker 2: You can't you can't beat him at Monopoly, forget about it. 149 00:06:37,200 --> 00:06:39,640 Speaker 2: He plays the digital version like now when I'm trying 150 00:06:39,640 --> 00:06:44,160 Speaker 2: to bribe him to behave a child. But we play Monopoly, 151 00:06:44,400 --> 00:06:48,640 Speaker 2: the board game in my home, and it's it's not 152 00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:52,120 Speaker 2: it's it's it's a warrior sport. It is not for 153 00:06:52,200 --> 00:06:53,919 Speaker 2: the faint of heart. So if you come over and 154 00:06:53,960 --> 00:06:56,040 Speaker 2: we love that, I would love to just know, well, 155 00:06:56,120 --> 00:06:56,600 Speaker 2: I don't know. 156 00:06:56,800 --> 00:06:59,240 Speaker 1: There are games that I lose at, which is most 157 00:06:59,320 --> 00:06:59,880 Speaker 1: all of them. 158 00:07:00,360 --> 00:07:01,080 Speaker 2: See the gamer. 159 00:07:01,240 --> 00:07:03,280 Speaker 1: I'm like, there are games. I lose all of them, 160 00:07:03,480 --> 00:07:07,320 Speaker 1: with the exception of anything that's like Mafia esque, Like 161 00:07:07,400 --> 00:07:09,640 Speaker 1: I can tell who's being deceptive? What's that? 162 00:07:09,680 --> 00:07:10,240 Speaker 2: Give me a game? 163 00:07:10,360 --> 00:07:11,800 Speaker 1: So like, do you know do you know the game 164 00:07:11,840 --> 00:07:15,000 Speaker 1: Mafia where it's like someone is like deemed the killer 165 00:07:15,360 --> 00:07:17,680 Speaker 1: or some like it's a group of people someone is 166 00:07:17,720 --> 00:07:19,560 Speaker 1: like labeled a killer. You might get your card. They 167 00:07:19,600 --> 00:07:22,320 Speaker 1: pass out cards and you're like, it's a villager or something. Yeah, 168 00:07:22,360 --> 00:07:24,000 Speaker 1: it's a it's a real game. Have you ever seen 169 00:07:24,040 --> 00:07:27,000 Speaker 1: the TV show Traders? No, okay, it's a little bit 170 00:07:27,080 --> 00:07:30,120 Speaker 1: like that. There are killers among us. It's there's a 171 00:07:30,160 --> 00:07:33,520 Speaker 1: mystery happening. Someone is a murderer or multiple people are 172 00:07:33,600 --> 00:07:36,360 Speaker 1: murderers in the group, and then the rest are say 173 00:07:36,520 --> 00:07:40,320 Speaker 1: villagers or civilians, and it's your job to guess who 174 00:07:40,560 --> 00:07:44,880 Speaker 1: is the murderer among Oh, and it's no, it's not 175 00:07:44,920 --> 00:07:46,920 Speaker 1: a board game. There's cards. There can be cards, or 176 00:07:46,960 --> 00:07:48,440 Speaker 1: you could just set it up yourself of your y. 177 00:07:48,800 --> 00:07:53,720 Speaker 2: You're a game. Nights are way too advance. I connect four, 178 00:07:54,640 --> 00:07:57,160 Speaker 2: but I'm gonna lose, And so like I want to 179 00:07:57,160 --> 00:07:58,280 Speaker 2: know who's being discstive. 180 00:07:58,400 --> 00:08:02,000 Speaker 1: More. Yes, I would be good at that and that alone. 181 00:08:02,040 --> 00:08:04,600 Speaker 1: Otherwise I'm losing. I've lost every game show I've ever 182 00:08:04,600 --> 00:08:06,840 Speaker 1: been on. It's embarrassing. I feel like people bring me 183 00:08:06,880 --> 00:08:07,520 Speaker 1: on to lose. 184 00:08:07,760 --> 00:08:12,360 Speaker 2: But I'm yeah, I know. I was on Family Feud 185 00:08:12,520 --> 00:08:15,760 Speaker 2: with stephen A. Smith and and we won handily. In fact, 186 00:08:15,760 --> 00:08:19,320 Speaker 2: he got zero points. And I really learned a lot 187 00:08:19,360 --> 00:08:22,640 Speaker 2: about being a sore loser watching Stevin A for over 188 00:08:22,640 --> 00:08:26,280 Speaker 2: a year be bitter. So every time her I'm losing that. 189 00:08:26,440 --> 00:08:28,560 Speaker 2: I used to get upset what I lost. Now, like 190 00:08:28,840 --> 00:08:34,240 Speaker 2: after seeing him lose and literally disown his family because 191 00:08:34,280 --> 00:08:36,960 Speaker 2: he was so salty. Yeah, I said, Okay, I've gotta 192 00:08:37,080 --> 00:08:39,360 Speaker 2: be a better sport about these things. But I don't like, 193 00:08:39,800 --> 00:08:41,040 Speaker 2: you know, They've asked me to go on like with 194 00:08:41,160 --> 00:08:43,720 Speaker 2: a Celebrity Jeopardy and all that. I can't. I can't 195 00:08:43,720 --> 00:08:44,280 Speaker 2: go out like that. 196 00:08:44,360 --> 00:08:47,000 Speaker 1: I've gone. I could not on Celebrity Jeopardy get the 197 00:08:47,040 --> 00:08:49,200 Speaker 1: buzzer to work for the life. And I'm not saying 198 00:08:49,200 --> 00:08:51,920 Speaker 1: mine was broken. I'm not claiming that, okay, but I'm 199 00:08:51,960 --> 00:08:54,479 Speaker 1: just claiming that whatever the buzzer. 200 00:08:54,320 --> 00:08:57,000 Speaker 2: Was not the hand eye coordination with me. 201 00:08:57,160 --> 00:08:59,640 Speaker 1: Like because basically, if you press too early, it locks 202 00:08:59,679 --> 00:09:01,400 Speaker 1: you out for a period of time. So by the 203 00:09:01,440 --> 00:09:03,520 Speaker 1: time while you're locked out, someone else is going to 204 00:09:03,600 --> 00:09:06,040 Speaker 1: hit the buzzer. And if you press too late, obviously 205 00:09:06,080 --> 00:09:08,040 Speaker 1: you just pressed too late, and so you're like trying 206 00:09:08,040 --> 00:09:10,600 Speaker 1: to get that exact right time to hit the buzzer. 207 00:09:10,880 --> 00:09:13,240 Speaker 1: That is a buzzered forward game. And I don't like 208 00:09:13,280 --> 00:09:16,040 Speaker 1: that I have to rely on technology gotcha to win 209 00:09:16,120 --> 00:09:17,760 Speaker 1: that one. But I would like to go back and 210 00:09:17,760 --> 00:09:18,960 Speaker 1: rectify things. 211 00:09:19,360 --> 00:09:24,280 Speaker 2: I think we should demand a recount, repeat you deserve it. 212 00:09:24,520 --> 00:09:27,240 Speaker 1: And honestly, let's just do something traditionally, put our hands 213 00:09:27,360 --> 00:09:29,160 Speaker 1: up or just call out the answer first. 214 00:09:29,160 --> 00:09:31,200 Speaker 2: And why do you have to answer it in a question? 215 00:09:31,559 --> 00:09:34,240 Speaker 1: And that shit was confusing because I don't watch regularly, 216 00:09:34,400 --> 00:09:37,040 Speaker 1: no offense. We love Jeopardy around here, but I don't. 217 00:09:37,600 --> 00:09:40,240 Speaker 1: I don't watch, so I would hit. When I would 218 00:09:40,280 --> 00:09:42,960 Speaker 1: get the buzzer first, I'd be like, okay, so I 219 00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:45,400 Speaker 1: have to put in a question for and then the time. 220 00:09:47,880 --> 00:09:51,680 Speaker 2: I, oh, no, I don't need will force. Have you 221 00:09:51,720 --> 00:09:52,440 Speaker 2: seen some of this. 222 00:09:52,720 --> 00:09:54,800 Speaker 1: Bad at that I was really mad, had on a 223 00:09:54,800 --> 00:09:56,360 Speaker 1: little strapless dress. 224 00:09:56,800 --> 00:09:57,320 Speaker 2: I gotta go. 225 00:09:58,160 --> 00:10:01,319 Speaker 1: You don't look because the best of is the worst stuff, 226 00:10:01,320 --> 00:10:03,559 Speaker 1: and it's me embarrassing myself and my family. 227 00:10:03,760 --> 00:10:06,120 Speaker 2: The fort thing gets me too, because I mean people 228 00:10:06,200 --> 00:10:09,360 Speaker 2: are like screaming out the answer from home and then 229 00:10:09,559 --> 00:10:13,400 Speaker 2: you go viral because there was like one letter missing 230 00:10:13,440 --> 00:10:15,480 Speaker 2: and for whatever your brain couldn't cut. 231 00:10:15,640 --> 00:10:19,240 Speaker 1: So what did moment? I mean, I missed everything? So 232 00:10:19,320 --> 00:10:22,720 Speaker 1: first of all, everything, Okay, I'm there to like elevate people. 233 00:10:23,120 --> 00:10:24,960 Speaker 1: I'm at these gates. They invite me and it's like 234 00:10:25,080 --> 00:10:27,600 Speaker 1: she's gonna be a good loser. But I'm sick of it. 235 00:10:27,880 --> 00:10:30,000 Speaker 1: I want to win. So when I did is it cake? 236 00:10:30,160 --> 00:10:30,840 Speaker 1: Do you know that one? 237 00:10:30,920 --> 00:10:31,120 Speaker 3: Yes? 238 00:10:31,280 --> 00:10:32,320 Speaker 1: Okay, when I did is it cake? 239 00:10:32,520 --> 00:10:33,160 Speaker 2: I guess the cake? 240 00:10:33,280 --> 00:10:35,920 Speaker 1: No? I did. I was savage apparently though that's not 241 00:10:36,040 --> 00:10:38,520 Speaker 1: the place to be savage, that's the place to be supportive. 242 00:10:38,559 --> 00:10:40,120 Speaker 1: And I was like, I can tell that's not cake. 243 00:10:40,840 --> 00:10:42,120 Speaker 1: I don't care. 244 00:10:41,480 --> 00:10:45,280 Speaker 2: So some people who they'd craft and they thought, oh god, 245 00:10:45,280 --> 00:10:47,760 Speaker 2: I'm gonna trick Eggo and you're like, yeah, I love frost. 246 00:10:48,200 --> 00:10:49,920 Speaker 1: I was like, it's off, that's not and then I 247 00:10:49,960 --> 00:10:51,600 Speaker 1: was like, but I need I need people to know 248 00:10:51,640 --> 00:10:53,439 Speaker 1: that I went in there with baggage, so I had 249 00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:55,680 Speaker 1: I was on a like losing streaks. 250 00:10:55,880 --> 00:10:58,320 Speaker 2: Shure, there's a baker who gave up their dreams because 251 00:10:58,840 --> 00:11:03,439 Speaker 2: I was like, there's some person's like, well, I'm gonna 252 00:11:03,760 --> 00:11:06,400 Speaker 2: now We're gonna go to work at the bank. I'll 253 00:11:06,440 --> 00:11:09,160 Speaker 2: be the banker on Monopoly. Because my baking dreams just 254 00:11:09,200 --> 00:11:11,920 Speaker 2: went up on all I know, I. 255 00:11:11,840 --> 00:11:13,520 Speaker 1: Had to like rein it in. I think I was 256 00:11:13,520 --> 00:11:15,760 Speaker 1: all with Taran kill him who watches with his kids, 257 00:11:15,800 --> 00:11:18,520 Speaker 1: and He's like, you don't want to guess? And then 258 00:11:18,559 --> 00:11:20,640 Speaker 1: I was like, well, what's what's the point right if 259 00:11:20,679 --> 00:11:22,120 Speaker 1: I'm not going to give it my best. 260 00:11:22,320 --> 00:11:25,480 Speaker 2: I have a rule. I don't like competition things I 261 00:11:25,520 --> 00:11:28,240 Speaker 2: won't Years ago, when I was in Chicago, Yeah, they 262 00:11:28,280 --> 00:11:31,040 Speaker 2: asked me to judge this little kid, Patgant, and I said, 263 00:11:31,040 --> 00:11:33,800 Speaker 2: actually I don't do that, but oh well it's a 264 00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:36,520 Speaker 2: great charity. I mean they kind of put the you 265 00:11:36,559 --> 00:11:39,040 Speaker 2: know the number on me and I agreed. And I 266 00:11:39,120 --> 00:11:42,280 Speaker 2: get there and these adorable little kids and I'm like, wait, no, 267 00:11:42,400 --> 00:11:46,200 Speaker 2: I can't judge kids. Are you kidding me? It was 268 00:11:46,320 --> 00:11:49,680 Speaker 2: near mutiny. All these like pageant moms were ready to 269 00:11:50,200 --> 00:11:52,800 Speaker 2: go off on my ass and I was like, okay, 270 00:11:52,800 --> 00:11:55,960 Speaker 2: wait a minite, waitit yeah, and I after that, I said, 271 00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:59,360 Speaker 2: you know, I don't have the ability to judge people 272 00:11:59,360 --> 00:12:01,760 Speaker 2: in that way that I don't do it, and I 273 00:12:02,120 --> 00:12:05,160 Speaker 2: can't because I'm not. I'm just like everybody's a way out. 274 00:12:06,760 --> 00:12:09,360 Speaker 2: See that's a good that's that makes you a good mom, 275 00:12:09,440 --> 00:12:12,319 Speaker 2: I think because I beat my son on thanks. No no, no, 276 00:12:12,320 --> 00:12:14,400 Speaker 2: no no. I'm like, I have the Michael George school 277 00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:16,160 Speaker 2: of thought. Okay, once you beat me, you know you're 278 00:12:16,200 --> 00:12:18,800 Speaker 2: a winner. My husband, he's a little different. He'll let 279 00:12:18,920 --> 00:12:22,560 Speaker 2: he'll let Moses come over here. I was like, listen, 280 00:12:22,960 --> 00:12:25,960 Speaker 2: I am not your father. You come here with you 281 00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:27,640 Speaker 2: go look straight to eye. You're gonna sit down. 282 00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:30,960 Speaker 1: Yeah, and he did that. Did your back was to 283 00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:33,240 Speaker 1: me while I was saying hello to Moses? And where 284 00:12:33,240 --> 00:12:35,560 Speaker 1: you give the eyes? You know what to do? 285 00:12:35,600 --> 00:12:37,160 Speaker 2: Because he always wants to go to grown up things 286 00:12:37,160 --> 00:12:39,120 Speaker 2: with me. So I said, okay, we're gonna go to 287 00:12:39,720 --> 00:12:43,080 Speaker 2: Egoes podcast. Is that what's iheartrate? Can I put it 288 00:12:43,120 --> 00:12:46,520 Speaker 2: in Google Maps? Yes, you could put it in Google maps. Okay. 289 00:12:46,600 --> 00:12:48,680 Speaker 2: So then we get to the first of all, Lydia, 290 00:12:48,760 --> 00:12:51,120 Speaker 2: who's a part of our PR team, is wonderful. She 291 00:12:51,200 --> 00:12:54,760 Speaker 2: got the brunt of his acting out because she opened 292 00:12:54,760 --> 00:12:57,720 Speaker 2: the door. What was the driver opens the door and 293 00:12:57,760 --> 00:13:01,440 Speaker 2: he sees it and goes, I don't know and runs 294 00:13:01,480 --> 00:13:04,720 Speaker 2: passport like Lydia was like, like the Bakers when you 295 00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:08,440 Speaker 2: rejected their dreams. She was like, I'm cute, what's wrought 296 00:13:08,480 --> 00:13:11,679 Speaker 2: this ty kid? But then he apologized and warmed up, 297 00:13:11,720 --> 00:13:13,880 Speaker 2: and then he got on the elevator. So yeah, so 298 00:13:14,160 --> 00:13:15,960 Speaker 2: he's all, he's all good right now. But he likes 299 00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:18,400 Speaker 2: to go to adult things, okay, and that, you know, 300 00:13:18,600 --> 00:13:21,440 Speaker 2: so interesting. I didn't have Moses until I was forty 301 00:13:21,440 --> 00:13:23,280 Speaker 2: eight years old, and now I just celebrated my fifty 302 00:13:23,280 --> 00:13:26,920 Speaker 2: fifth birthday and he's six now, thank you, my darling. 303 00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:29,720 Speaker 2: And so it's so fascinating because I'm always in the 304 00:13:29,720 --> 00:13:33,520 Speaker 2: throes of this challenge of wanting him to see what 305 00:13:33,600 --> 00:13:37,559 Speaker 2: I do, because I tell people at my old job before, 306 00:13:37,559 --> 00:13:39,080 Speaker 2: I was like, oh, you know, I would have been 307 00:13:39,120 --> 00:13:43,240 Speaker 2: the only non mom on that ensemble cast that I 308 00:13:43,280 --> 00:13:49,360 Speaker 2: was on. And I remember an extra woman saying to me, 309 00:13:49,520 --> 00:13:52,800 Speaker 2: you know that I wasn't relatable. She didn't say because 310 00:13:52,840 --> 00:13:55,840 Speaker 2: of the motherhood, but I know what she was alluding to. 311 00:13:56,559 --> 00:13:59,960 Speaker 2: And so I'm very sensitive to talking about motherhood and 312 00:14:00,160 --> 00:14:02,600 Speaker 2: because I was, I've been a non mom for far longer, 313 00:14:03,200 --> 00:14:05,680 Speaker 2: you know, than actually being a mom, And now that 314 00:14:05,760 --> 00:14:08,720 Speaker 2: I have him, I want him to see this part 315 00:14:08,760 --> 00:14:11,640 Speaker 2: of my life and understand that, you know, whether you 316 00:14:11,720 --> 00:14:13,120 Speaker 2: work in or out of the home or whatever your 317 00:14:13,160 --> 00:14:16,160 Speaker 2: journey is, is your journey. For me, the journey is 318 00:14:16,200 --> 00:14:19,160 Speaker 2: working outside of the home, and I'm being a part 319 00:14:19,240 --> 00:14:22,440 Speaker 2: of it. And he's the inspiration for you know, my 320 00:14:22,560 --> 00:14:24,440 Speaker 2: children's book, and he's also on our show a lot. 321 00:14:24,480 --> 00:14:26,040 Speaker 2: And I want him to understand people are going to 322 00:14:26,080 --> 00:14:27,800 Speaker 2: come over and say hi to you. You're gonna be 323 00:14:27,840 --> 00:14:29,760 Speaker 2: curious because you're a part of my life. 324 00:14:30,040 --> 00:14:30,240 Speaker 1: Yeah. 325 00:14:31,240 --> 00:14:33,200 Speaker 2: And then suddenly I feel guilty because we just had 326 00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:35,200 Speaker 2: like Jonie Turner Smith on it. She doesn't show her 327 00:14:35,280 --> 00:14:37,680 Speaker 2: kid's picture, She'll say her name to show a picture 328 00:14:37,680 --> 00:14:41,400 Speaker 2: of me. Moll, I'm like all over this, terrible mom 329 00:14:42,760 --> 00:14:45,360 Speaker 2: Jesus bringing him to a podcast. 330 00:14:46,480 --> 00:14:49,680 Speaker 1: I always wonder how parents make that decision. I totally 331 00:14:49,720 --> 00:14:53,960 Speaker 1: get the decision to not share your children's identity. In 332 00:14:53,960 --> 00:14:55,920 Speaker 1: my mind, I'd like to think I would be that 333 00:14:56,040 --> 00:14:58,560 Speaker 1: kind of parent who wouldn't share children, my children's identity 334 00:14:58,800 --> 00:15:01,720 Speaker 1: in my mind, but like my nieces. Their pictures are 335 00:15:01,760 --> 00:15:02,960 Speaker 1: all over my Instagram. 336 00:15:03,040 --> 00:15:05,320 Speaker 2: I'm like, they're just too precious, because it's it's a 337 00:15:05,360 --> 00:15:08,400 Speaker 2: normal sensation to want to share the things that make 338 00:15:08,480 --> 00:15:11,440 Speaker 2: us happy, right, so, whether it's a food restaurant or 339 00:15:11,840 --> 00:15:13,520 Speaker 2: me and not to create a child with a meal, 340 00:15:14,560 --> 00:15:20,520 Speaker 2: but be cute. But it's you know, even though we 341 00:15:20,560 --> 00:15:22,640 Speaker 2: live our lives in the public eye as we do, 342 00:15:22,960 --> 00:15:25,560 Speaker 2: I think it's only natural to want to share the 343 00:15:25,600 --> 00:15:28,520 Speaker 2: things because you're still human, right, You're still ego when 344 00:15:28,520 --> 00:15:30,480 Speaker 2: you go home and I go and we're still who 345 00:15:30,520 --> 00:15:33,720 Speaker 2: we are, and even in this format of conversation, you're 346 00:15:33,800 --> 00:15:35,960 Speaker 2: exactly as you were the day I met you, and 347 00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:39,440 Speaker 2: I hope I'm the same. And so it's like you're 348 00:15:39,520 --> 00:15:42,280 Speaker 2: naturally inclined to share the things you love, and social 349 00:15:42,360 --> 00:15:44,520 Speaker 2: media makes you want to share the things you love. 350 00:15:44,880 --> 00:15:48,160 Speaker 2: And so with my son, originally I had a plan. 351 00:15:48,200 --> 00:15:50,960 Speaker 2: I was like, Okay, I'm going to share him for 352 00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:53,880 Speaker 2: the first year, right because kind of babies look like babies, 353 00:15:55,320 --> 00:15:58,680 Speaker 2: And I said, once he becomes a more distinct looking person, 354 00:15:58,840 --> 00:16:02,600 Speaker 2: I won't share, and he's clearly, very distinctly, but I 355 00:16:02,760 --> 00:16:04,760 Speaker 2: just kept sharing. And then he's you know, he's a 356 00:16:04,800 --> 00:16:06,720 Speaker 2: part of the show. And when I go out to 357 00:16:06,840 --> 00:16:09,200 Speaker 2: the show, every you know, So we shoot three days 358 00:16:09,200 --> 00:16:11,760 Speaker 2: a week, two shows a day, one hundred and seventy 359 00:16:11,800 --> 00:16:15,080 Speaker 2: shows a season. So our season starts in September, goes 360 00:16:15,080 --> 00:16:18,240 Speaker 2: through May. And you know, ninety nine percent of the people, 361 00:16:18,280 --> 00:16:21,320 Speaker 2: whether they are moms or not, they ask how's Moses, 362 00:16:21,840 --> 00:16:24,720 Speaker 2: And so it's always a you know, it's thing. But 363 00:16:24,720 --> 00:16:26,440 Speaker 2: I've had, you know, a couple of times where I've 364 00:16:26,480 --> 00:16:30,440 Speaker 2: had to wrangle people in but for the most part, 365 00:16:30,560 --> 00:16:32,560 Speaker 2: you know, I think people understand he's still a kid 366 00:16:33,080 --> 00:16:34,680 Speaker 2: and he's here with me. But when he goes to 367 00:16:34,680 --> 00:16:37,320 Speaker 2: the airport, they're like, there's Moses. He's like walking through 368 00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:41,720 Speaker 2: like John Travolta. He's walking through the airport like I 369 00:16:41,760 --> 00:16:42,120 Speaker 2: love it. 370 00:16:42,120 --> 00:16:44,560 Speaker 1: So he likes it. He likes being recognized. 371 00:16:44,720 --> 00:16:47,160 Speaker 2: I think he Well, he told me that today. He goes, 372 00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:51,640 Speaker 2: I'm kinda shy and people with blonde hair. I don't 373 00:16:51,800 --> 00:16:53,800 Speaker 2: like seeing people hide it people with blonde hair, And 374 00:16:53,840 --> 00:16:56,920 Speaker 2: I was like, they're freaking what, So well, he just 375 00:16:57,040 --> 00:17:00,440 Speaker 2: made it up. He goes like on Spidey, it's related 376 00:17:00,480 --> 00:17:01,680 Speaker 2: it to some villain. 377 00:17:01,680 --> 00:17:02,000 Speaker 1: I was fight. 378 00:17:02,120 --> 00:17:04,480 Speaker 2: I'll say, well, that's weird, and I said, well, so 379 00:17:04,600 --> 00:17:06,200 Speaker 2: it has blonde hair and goes well, I actually don't 380 00:17:06,240 --> 00:17:09,479 Speaker 2: like her anymore because they go to the site. So 381 00:17:09,520 --> 00:17:12,239 Speaker 2: we have a rule. I said, listen, you you have 382 00:17:12,320 --> 00:17:14,199 Speaker 2: to at least look them in the eye and say hello. 383 00:17:14,560 --> 00:17:17,320 Speaker 2: You don't have to do anything beyond that, you know, 384 00:17:17,359 --> 00:17:19,560 Speaker 2: because I do want to have a child who has 385 00:17:19,600 --> 00:17:25,119 Speaker 2: autonomy and choice right and also balancing stranger danger. You 386 00:17:25,200 --> 00:17:27,760 Speaker 2: might know him, but he doesn't know you, right, not you, 387 00:17:29,400 --> 00:17:31,840 Speaker 2: And so what I tried, that's your boy. But what 388 00:17:31,920 --> 00:17:36,480 Speaker 2: I try to do is make sure that he's he 389 00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:39,679 Speaker 2: is able to We live in New York City, right, 390 00:17:39,720 --> 00:17:42,320 Speaker 2: I grew up in a teeny tiny Luling, Texas population 391 00:17:42,400 --> 00:17:44,639 Speaker 2: one thousand and half of those are my relatives. I 392 00:17:44,680 --> 00:17:47,040 Speaker 2: want him to be able to navigate in this world 393 00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:50,000 Speaker 2: with confidence. And part of that is when someone says 394 00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:52,000 Speaker 2: hello to you, being able to look someone in the eyes. Hello, 395 00:17:52,080 --> 00:17:54,879 Speaker 2: how are you stand in your space? And so I 396 00:17:54,920 --> 00:17:57,720 Speaker 2: say to him, you know that's your space. You say hello, 397 00:17:58,080 --> 00:18:00,439 Speaker 2: and you can keep it moving. You're not obli to 398 00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:03,920 Speaker 2: then let them interview you about your school or anything else. 399 00:18:04,240 --> 00:18:06,320 Speaker 2: But you look someone in the eye and you say hello. 400 00:18:06,320 --> 00:18:08,960 Speaker 1: That's a beautiful way to do it, I feel like, 401 00:18:09,040 --> 00:18:12,119 Speaker 1: because it's you're striking that balance of having the autonomy 402 00:18:12,119 --> 00:18:14,520 Speaker 1: having a boundary, but also these are manners. 403 00:18:14,600 --> 00:18:16,640 Speaker 2: These are manners, right, and it's true, and I want 404 00:18:16,680 --> 00:18:20,160 Speaker 2: him to understand boundaries. It's something that you know, here 405 00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:23,119 Speaker 2: I am in my life. I think the biggest learning 406 00:18:23,200 --> 00:18:26,720 Speaker 2: curve in the last probably four years of my life 407 00:18:27,160 --> 00:18:32,680 Speaker 2: really had surrounded boundaries and really not only setting boundaries 408 00:18:32,680 --> 00:18:34,639 Speaker 2: for myself, but even with I have about one hundred 409 00:18:34,640 --> 00:18:37,080 Speaker 2: and fifty employees, and I used to be I mean, 410 00:18:37,080 --> 00:18:38,960 Speaker 2: I email you all night long and be like, they'll 411 00:18:38,960 --> 00:18:41,240 Speaker 2: see it in the morning, secretly hoping you see that 412 00:18:41,280 --> 00:18:44,960 Speaker 2: guy out, you know. And I really had to establish 413 00:18:45,040 --> 00:18:48,399 Speaker 2: boundaries and starting this show because I was excited and 414 00:18:48,840 --> 00:18:50,959 Speaker 2: I had so much at stake and I needed this 415 00:18:51,000 --> 00:18:55,280 Speaker 2: show to work. But that didn't mean that it had 416 00:18:55,320 --> 00:18:57,640 Speaker 2: to come at the expense of others. You know, if 417 00:18:57,680 --> 00:18:59,320 Speaker 2: I my name's on the door, if I want to 418 00:18:59,359 --> 00:19:01,440 Speaker 2: stay up twenty four hours a day, I'm muna stay 419 00:19:01,480 --> 00:19:04,439 Speaker 2: up twenty four hours a day, and learning that I 420 00:19:04,480 --> 00:19:07,840 Speaker 2: cannot signal that expectation of others, right, And even though 421 00:19:07,840 --> 00:19:11,280 Speaker 2: I wasn't verbally saying it, you know, you can do 422 00:19:11,359 --> 00:19:14,480 Speaker 2: things that make people feel like, well, if I don't 423 00:19:14,520 --> 00:19:16,640 Speaker 2: give that much time, she doesn't think that I'm doing 424 00:19:16,680 --> 00:19:20,760 Speaker 2: a good job. So I've been very mindful of with 425 00:19:20,840 --> 00:19:23,920 Speaker 2: my team saying you know, I might I've gone did 426 00:19:23,960 --> 00:19:25,760 Speaker 2: two shows and go to the d the night we 427 00:19:25,800 --> 00:19:28,159 Speaker 2: saw each other, and then came back and write, that's me. 428 00:19:28,280 --> 00:19:31,760 Speaker 2: I'm not expecting that of you. And in return, like, 429 00:19:32,560 --> 00:19:34,760 Speaker 2: if you're behind, you can't just be calling me the 430 00:19:34,760 --> 00:19:36,280 Speaker 2: middle of dinner with my kid either, you know what 431 00:19:36,320 --> 00:19:40,359 Speaker 2: I mean? So like establishing those those respectful boundaries that 432 00:19:40,480 --> 00:19:44,720 Speaker 2: still allow for productive workspace and also just personal boundaries. 433 00:19:44,720 --> 00:19:46,879 Speaker 2: I mean my mom. I had a friend years ago 434 00:19:46,880 --> 00:19:48,679 Speaker 2: told me, like, you know, as time goes on your 435 00:19:48,680 --> 00:19:51,520 Speaker 2: relationship with your parents, you'll have to set boundaries. 436 00:19:51,520 --> 00:19:54,480 Speaker 1: And I'm like, no, my mama, she doesn't do boundaries. 437 00:19:55,760 --> 00:19:59,240 Speaker 2: What my mother? My mother's We have cameras in my 438 00:19:59,320 --> 00:20:02,679 Speaker 2: son's room. My mother is linked to the camera to 439 00:20:02,720 --> 00:20:05,280 Speaker 2: which she presses her button from her home in Texas, 440 00:20:05,520 --> 00:20:08,880 Speaker 2: and she's like, what y'all doing? I'm like, my mom. 441 00:20:09,040 --> 00:20:12,240 Speaker 2: My husband's in this boxer and he's like, your mom 442 00:20:12,359 --> 00:20:15,720 Speaker 2: is like hid your mama? We're talking to us. 443 00:20:17,600 --> 00:20:17,760 Speaker 3: Later. 444 00:20:17,880 --> 00:20:20,040 Speaker 2: And she was like, so I was looking in on 445 00:20:20,080 --> 00:20:21,720 Speaker 2: the camera. What were y'all talking about? 446 00:20:22,280 --> 00:20:23,560 Speaker 1: Mom? My? 447 00:20:23,560 --> 00:20:25,480 Speaker 2: Mom boundary? 448 00:20:25,920 --> 00:20:27,760 Speaker 1: Now if you tried to tell her like, hey, we 449 00:20:27,800 --> 00:20:29,840 Speaker 1: need to establish a boundary, how would she respond to that? 450 00:20:29,920 --> 00:20:33,240 Speaker 2: Honestly, I wouldn't be in this chair. No, no, no, no, 451 00:20:33,280 --> 00:20:36,080 Speaker 2: I will say, I'll say, Mom, really like you know, okay. 452 00:20:36,160 --> 00:20:38,359 Speaker 2: I was like, I'll just kind of like Jim like, 453 00:20:38,359 --> 00:20:39,720 Speaker 2: come on, Mom, really really? 454 00:20:49,040 --> 00:20:51,200 Speaker 1: Now, you said you wanted Moses to have a sense 455 00:20:51,240 --> 00:20:53,639 Speaker 1: of identity on autonomy. You want him to have a 456 00:20:53,640 --> 00:20:55,760 Speaker 1: sense of identity and autonomy. Do you feel like you 457 00:20:55,800 --> 00:20:57,320 Speaker 1: had that as a kid? Oh? 458 00:20:57,359 --> 00:21:02,720 Speaker 2: Absolutely so. Even though my mom was definitely what they 459 00:21:02,760 --> 00:21:04,960 Speaker 2: call the f around and find out kind of parents, 460 00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:07,560 Speaker 2: she was not a gentle parent. My mother had me 461 00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:09,560 Speaker 2: when she was nineteen years old and she was a 462 00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:12,840 Speaker 2: single mom before she married my stepfather, who I referred 463 00:21:12,840 --> 00:21:14,919 Speaker 2: to as they the dad got meant for me to have. 464 00:21:15,000 --> 00:21:16,680 Speaker 2: And what I mean by that he you know, it's 465 00:21:16,720 --> 00:21:18,840 Speaker 2: not my biological father, but he was meant God wanted 466 00:21:18,880 --> 00:21:21,359 Speaker 2: me to have somebody shepherd me yea and helped my mother. 467 00:21:21,640 --> 00:21:24,880 Speaker 2: And that is the person that was brought into our lives. 468 00:21:25,400 --> 00:21:31,680 Speaker 2: I grew up very much. I was allowed to run, jump, kickbox, 469 00:21:31,920 --> 00:21:35,439 Speaker 2: I mean like I did it all I was. And 470 00:21:35,480 --> 00:21:37,600 Speaker 2: I wasn't necessarily quote unquote tomboo, because I don't even 471 00:21:37,600 --> 00:21:40,840 Speaker 2: know what that means. I was more just adventurous. I 472 00:21:40,840 --> 00:21:43,000 Speaker 2: mean I was Nancy Drew one day, and then I 473 00:21:43,119 --> 00:21:45,480 Speaker 2: was wonder Woman the next day, and then I was 474 00:21:45,520 --> 00:21:48,480 Speaker 2: like the invisible character hiding under you know. I was 475 00:21:48,560 --> 00:21:54,760 Speaker 2: allowed to have a huge imagination. I think that's helped 476 00:21:54,760 --> 00:21:57,159 Speaker 2: me obviously later creatively. I got in a lot of 477 00:21:57,160 --> 00:22:01,440 Speaker 2: trouble in school, a lot of I went to Catholic school. 478 00:22:01,440 --> 00:22:04,280 Speaker 2: I was suspended. Gosh, I was probably suspended maybe three 479 00:22:04,320 --> 00:22:05,119 Speaker 2: or four times. 480 00:22:04,840 --> 00:22:06,439 Speaker 1: Three or four time. What's the worst thing you did 481 00:22:06,520 --> 00:22:14,320 Speaker 1: to get suspended? Honestly, honest, honestly. So my family did not. 482 00:22:16,040 --> 00:22:20,960 Speaker 2: Have the My parents and family did not put up 483 00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:25,080 Speaker 2: with bullying. And so my parents and family would say, 484 00:22:25,560 --> 00:22:28,879 Speaker 2: if someone hits you, take them out, like just just 485 00:22:29,119 --> 00:22:30,280 Speaker 2: go in and so. 486 00:22:30,720 --> 00:22:33,800 Speaker 1: Don't start nothing, but start finishing, finish. 487 00:22:34,920 --> 00:22:37,360 Speaker 2: So I would not necessarily tell my son that today. 488 00:22:37,640 --> 00:22:40,040 Speaker 2: But I grew up in a in an environment where 489 00:22:40,080 --> 00:22:42,800 Speaker 2: I was the only child in the home because my 490 00:22:42,880 --> 00:22:45,480 Speaker 2: step siblings were a little older, and my brother came later, 491 00:22:45,760 --> 00:22:47,920 Speaker 2: and so I was a target. I was a target 492 00:22:48,000 --> 00:22:51,840 Speaker 2: because you know, my mom had me and you know, 493 00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:54,439 Speaker 2: track and clarinet, and I was this. I was like 494 00:22:54,440 --> 00:22:57,119 Speaker 2: this a little show kid right in some ways. And 495 00:22:57,240 --> 00:23:00,119 Speaker 2: when you're an only child, you're primed for others to 496 00:23:00,119 --> 00:23:04,800 Speaker 2: come at you. And I had an issue with some 497 00:23:04,920 --> 00:23:09,360 Speaker 2: kids once and I ran all the way home just 498 00:23:09,560 --> 00:23:11,399 Speaker 2: out of breath. I mean they were chasing me. It 499 00:23:11,440 --> 00:23:18,480 Speaker 2: was like a Gooney's gone back, that's probably And I 500 00:23:18,520 --> 00:23:21,520 Speaker 2: got home, and I've heard other people have a similar 501 00:23:21,560 --> 00:23:23,239 Speaker 2: situation in their lives. I have heard other people talk 502 00:23:23,280 --> 00:23:26,159 Speaker 2: about it. My mom basically opened the door and she's like, 503 00:23:26,280 --> 00:23:28,520 Speaker 2: what is going on? And I'm like, get out of 504 00:23:28,520 --> 00:23:30,720 Speaker 2: the way. They go kill us all, kill us all. 505 00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:33,080 Speaker 2: And my mom's like who, And I'm like the bully 506 00:23:33,119 --> 00:23:35,960 Speaker 2: that they're like. And my mother said, you're gonna go 507 00:23:36,000 --> 00:23:38,520 Speaker 2: out there and you're gonna either fight me or fight them, 508 00:23:39,160 --> 00:23:41,560 Speaker 2: because you can't have this. You got to stand up 509 00:23:41,560 --> 00:23:46,480 Speaker 2: for yourself. And after that, I had a low tolerance 510 00:23:46,560 --> 00:23:49,280 Speaker 2: for bullies, so much so that I became like the 511 00:23:49,320 --> 00:23:52,640 Speaker 2: neighborhood avenger like when everybody was like, there was this kid, 512 00:23:52,720 --> 00:23:54,639 Speaker 2: go figure, I'm from the South. There's this kid. His 513 00:23:54,760 --> 00:23:59,000 Speaker 2: name was Booker T. And he was a bully. No, 514 00:23:59,080 --> 00:24:00,440 Speaker 2: he was not going to be any more a leader. 515 00:24:00,480 --> 00:24:02,520 Speaker 2: He might be leading a prison ride right now, but. 516 00:24:04,680 --> 00:24:07,560 Speaker 1: Could end up very different. And it did, and he did. 517 00:24:07,560 --> 00:24:09,919 Speaker 2: And he was painting the butt and he was picking 518 00:24:09,960 --> 00:24:12,680 Speaker 2: on everybody, and he was taking these bikes. He was 519 00:24:12,720 --> 00:24:15,520 Speaker 2: just as a jerk in our neighborhood. And by then 520 00:24:15,560 --> 00:24:18,199 Speaker 2: I'd gotten the reputation for like standing up to the 521 00:24:18,240 --> 00:24:21,040 Speaker 2: evils of the world. And my dad always drilled in 522 00:24:21,080 --> 00:24:22,760 Speaker 2: my head, he's like all of my children, you're the 523 00:24:22,840 --> 00:24:25,639 Speaker 2: kid for right. And that's something that I grew up with, 524 00:24:25,680 --> 00:24:29,520 Speaker 2: that that that tone always that my grandfather, my aunt, 525 00:24:29,760 --> 00:24:33,240 Speaker 2: my mother, and my father always felt that I was 526 00:24:33,240 --> 00:24:36,320 Speaker 2: a reasonable person. Even as a child, I had this 527 00:24:36,440 --> 00:24:40,040 Speaker 2: I guess, well, let's look at both sides. Okay, my 528 00:24:40,119 --> 00:24:41,560 Speaker 2: mom is surprised, I'm not an a turn. 529 00:24:41,680 --> 00:24:43,480 Speaker 1: I was gonna say, were you meant to be alloy? 530 00:24:43,600 --> 00:24:46,439 Speaker 2: My mother says it all the time. But you know, 531 00:24:46,560 --> 00:24:48,520 Speaker 2: the kid came. They all came to me like Booker 532 00:24:48,600 --> 00:24:52,320 Speaker 2: T is just grgure And there we start marching like 533 00:24:52,320 --> 00:24:54,639 Speaker 2: I'm a little black normal ray, you know, and I 534 00:24:54,680 --> 00:24:57,080 Speaker 2: have all and I handled him. 535 00:24:57,200 --> 00:24:58,760 Speaker 1: You handled Booker T. Boy? 536 00:24:59,200 --> 00:25:03,120 Speaker 2: A boy? Do you say that? My father? I came 537 00:25:03,160 --> 00:25:07,240 Speaker 2: home like Punky Brewster. My hair's all out now, ponytail's unraveled. 538 00:25:07,520 --> 00:25:09,679 Speaker 2: And I came home and my dad was like, what 539 00:25:09,880 --> 00:25:11,760 Speaker 2: happened here? You know, because my dad was in the 540 00:25:11,760 --> 00:25:14,080 Speaker 2: military and he's like what he sees all these kids, 541 00:25:14,119 --> 00:25:16,240 Speaker 2: And I'm like, like Rocky coming back home after I 542 00:25:16,440 --> 00:25:22,600 Speaker 2: like handed his whole ant, and my dad said what happened? 543 00:25:22,600 --> 00:25:24,560 Speaker 2: And I said, you know, Booker T's been picking on everyone, 544 00:25:24,720 --> 00:25:26,640 Speaker 2: and we're fed up with him. We're tired of it. 545 00:25:27,160 --> 00:25:29,040 Speaker 2: And so I went and I beat him up, and 546 00:25:29,080 --> 00:25:33,000 Speaker 2: my father said, you're twelve. Now you're gonna have to stop. 547 00:25:33,040 --> 00:25:36,000 Speaker 2: At some point. Boys are bigger and they're stronger, yeah, 548 00:25:36,280 --> 00:25:38,840 Speaker 2: and you're not. And then I said to my dad, Well, 549 00:25:38,920 --> 00:25:40,960 Speaker 2: my my uncle O SI his brother, I go. Uncle 550 00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:43,880 Speaker 2: OC was right there watching. My Dad's like, oh my 551 00:25:46,119 --> 00:25:49,200 Speaker 2: I snitched out O. God rest his soul. But yeah, 552 00:25:49,240 --> 00:25:51,280 Speaker 2: So I grew up, like you know, and so later 553 00:25:51,320 --> 00:25:55,600 Speaker 2: in life, I'm in high school and I, you know, 554 00:25:56,119 --> 00:25:58,359 Speaker 2: I was well liked you know, I think. So I 555 00:25:58,480 --> 00:26:00,719 Speaker 2: was in drama class. You know, I had great my 556 00:26:00,800 --> 00:26:03,879 Speaker 2: friends were They used to basically make fun of the 557 00:26:03,880 --> 00:26:07,000 Speaker 2: fact that I had the wide range of friends. You know, 558 00:26:08,040 --> 00:26:10,640 Speaker 2: this is like what early nineties. So I had two 559 00:26:10,680 --> 00:26:12,760 Speaker 2: friends who were gay, and you know, back then it 560 00:26:12,800 --> 00:26:15,359 Speaker 2: wasn't as supportive. And I had a friend who I 561 00:26:15,359 --> 00:26:18,600 Speaker 2: had experienced homelessness and his you know, I won't say same, 562 00:26:18,640 --> 00:26:19,800 Speaker 2: but anyway, he was one of the kids in my 563 00:26:19,800 --> 00:26:22,480 Speaker 2: class because I went to what was referred to as 564 00:26:22,520 --> 00:26:23,480 Speaker 2: a magnet school. 565 00:26:24,440 --> 00:26:26,640 Speaker 1: Okay, everyone had to apply, everyone had. 566 00:26:26,560 --> 00:26:29,720 Speaker 2: To apply, and so these were kids from various backgrounds, 567 00:26:29,720 --> 00:26:32,800 Speaker 2: but all had tested in and so some of us 568 00:26:32,840 --> 00:26:35,879 Speaker 2: it was like Fame school almost and just some odd characters. 569 00:26:36,320 --> 00:26:38,280 Speaker 2: And then there's me and you know, and I'm blended in. 570 00:26:38,760 --> 00:26:42,600 Speaker 2: And there were some kids who were not in our 571 00:26:42,640 --> 00:26:44,520 Speaker 2: program who were not so nice. And there was a 572 00:26:44,520 --> 00:26:47,320 Speaker 2: girl in particular, and I'm like in tenth grade and 573 00:26:47,320 --> 00:26:49,280 Speaker 2: I had this. I will never fore this is crazy. 574 00:26:49,280 --> 00:26:51,280 Speaker 2: I can remember this. I had a denim dress my 575 00:26:51,320 --> 00:26:53,760 Speaker 2: mom had just gotten me and I thought so cute 576 00:26:53,880 --> 00:26:56,680 Speaker 2: at the lunch table, and she came and dowscrape juice 577 00:26:56,680 --> 00:27:00,320 Speaker 2: all over me, and it was like something from the 578 00:27:00,359 --> 00:27:04,040 Speaker 2: Mean Girl's film It's crazy, I know, right, do me right? 579 00:27:04,080 --> 00:27:09,920 Speaker 2: Regina doubtst me like or like bringing on bringing, and 580 00:27:10,040 --> 00:27:13,040 Speaker 2: I gave her the booker t okay, the book. I 581 00:27:13,080 --> 00:27:15,720 Speaker 2: got kicked out of school and I got sent to 582 00:27:15,960 --> 00:27:20,240 Speaker 2: even though I was even though I was defending myself. 583 00:27:21,160 --> 00:27:23,480 Speaker 2: Back then, this was the beginning of zero tolerance because 584 00:27:23,520 --> 00:27:27,080 Speaker 2: bullying had become Now we talk about it much more openly. 585 00:27:27,840 --> 00:27:30,360 Speaker 2: This was the beginning of the national conversation of bullying 586 00:27:30,400 --> 00:27:33,439 Speaker 2: and how pre social media, but it had taken a 587 00:27:33,440 --> 00:27:38,199 Speaker 2: stringhold and it was for whatever my school. It was 588 00:27:38,280 --> 00:27:41,520 Speaker 2: a lot of it with young women, which is why 589 00:27:41,520 --> 00:27:44,959 Speaker 2: I'm so mindful of supporting other women now because for 590 00:27:45,000 --> 00:27:47,760 Speaker 2: some reason, just at that particular time, I don't know 591 00:27:47,800 --> 00:27:50,280 Speaker 2: what was in the social zitegeist, but there was a 592 00:27:50,320 --> 00:27:54,360 Speaker 2: lot of mean girl behavior. And then I got sent 593 00:27:54,440 --> 00:27:58,800 Speaker 2: to this like school, like off campus school. 594 00:27:58,680 --> 00:27:59,800 Speaker 1: An alternative school. 595 00:28:00,119 --> 00:28:01,639 Speaker 2: My parents were really I had to go for like 596 00:28:01,680 --> 00:28:04,199 Speaker 2: two months, oh boy, And it was like when they 597 00:28:04,240 --> 00:28:06,560 Speaker 2: had started cracking down and then later came back and 598 00:28:06,600 --> 00:28:07,840 Speaker 2: that was fine, but. 599 00:28:07,800 --> 00:28:09,320 Speaker 1: Any part of you, like you guys told me to 600 00:28:09,359 --> 00:28:12,000 Speaker 1: defend myself. It's become a part of my. 601 00:28:11,760 --> 00:28:13,239 Speaker 2: My mom did not care. My mom was like, what 602 00:28:13,240 --> 00:28:14,560 Speaker 2: time do I need to pick you up from school 603 00:28:14,560 --> 00:28:16,000 Speaker 2: to take you to the other school. She didn't care 604 00:28:16,040 --> 00:28:18,560 Speaker 2: because my mother felt like academically I was going to 605 00:28:18,600 --> 00:28:21,120 Speaker 2: be okay, social emotional, I was always allowed to talk 606 00:28:21,119 --> 00:28:24,879 Speaker 2: about my feelings and wonderfully supportive. But my mom is 607 00:28:24,880 --> 00:28:29,440 Speaker 2: an educator and she has a very low tolerance for bullying, 608 00:28:30,160 --> 00:28:35,919 Speaker 2: and she grew up on a farm and just you know, 609 00:28:36,080 --> 00:28:38,600 Speaker 2: kindness was a very big part of my family. Or 610 00:28:38,640 --> 00:28:42,280 Speaker 2: advocating and rallying for other people. That was always a 611 00:28:42,320 --> 00:28:44,840 Speaker 2: thing in my home. As I said, my father who 612 00:28:44,960 --> 00:28:47,960 Speaker 2: raised me was in the military. It's two purple hearts 613 00:28:48,440 --> 00:28:51,480 Speaker 2: twenty eight years. So I just grew up around folks 614 00:28:51,520 --> 00:28:55,000 Speaker 2: who were the kind of people like ten toes down, 615 00:28:55,560 --> 00:28:58,560 Speaker 2: defend yourself, and whoever you came to the party with, 616 00:28:58,720 --> 00:29:03,320 Speaker 2: you leave, And so that was always something and I 617 00:29:03,360 --> 00:29:05,680 Speaker 2: think with even with my son to this day, those 618 00:29:05,720 --> 00:29:10,320 Speaker 2: are tones and and and and core beliefs like I 619 00:29:10,320 --> 00:29:13,760 Speaker 2: have the same best friend from age five. Wow, all 620 00:29:13,800 --> 00:29:16,320 Speaker 2: of my crew pretty much says a couple of people 621 00:29:16,360 --> 00:29:20,120 Speaker 2: who had to get kicked out here thanks to the grass. 622 00:29:20,160 --> 00:29:22,880 Speaker 2: But for the most part. You know, I'm still with 623 00:29:23,000 --> 00:29:23,960 Speaker 2: the date I came with. 624 00:29:24,200 --> 00:29:24,240 Speaker 3: No. 625 00:29:24,400 --> 00:29:28,600 Speaker 1: Wow, that's incredible. That is amazing. Oh, I don't know. 626 00:29:28,880 --> 00:29:31,800 Speaker 1: I think people are like that. No. I was just 627 00:29:31,840 --> 00:29:34,200 Speaker 1: listening to someone on the podcast saying that every seven 628 00:29:34,280 --> 00:29:37,680 Speaker 1: years as an adult, you basically make new friends, Like. 629 00:29:38,440 --> 00:29:40,560 Speaker 2: There are some new people that like listen, when I 630 00:29:40,560 --> 00:29:42,480 Speaker 2: met you, it was like moth to flames, yeah, and 631 00:29:42,520 --> 00:29:45,720 Speaker 2: I'm like, not, I'm socially awkward. So I'm like, I 632 00:29:45,760 --> 00:29:47,560 Speaker 2: got there and it was an event that they didn't 633 00:29:47,600 --> 00:29:50,280 Speaker 2: let us bring a plus one, and generally dal I 634 00:29:50,360 --> 00:29:52,680 Speaker 2: generally decline things where I can't bring a plus one 635 00:29:53,360 --> 00:29:55,720 Speaker 2: a because I think they discriminate against single people. It's like, 636 00:29:55,760 --> 00:29:58,520 Speaker 2: you can bring your husband, Yeah, I want to bring 637 00:29:58,560 --> 00:29:59,040 Speaker 2: my friend. 638 00:29:59,120 --> 00:29:59,719 Speaker 1: Yeah. 639 00:29:59,840 --> 00:30:02,680 Speaker 2: So I tend to say no to because I've been 640 00:30:02,720 --> 00:30:05,920 Speaker 2: scorn for being single for so long and so now 641 00:30:06,000 --> 00:30:07,640 Speaker 2: I'm married and I want to bring my husband because 642 00:30:07,640 --> 00:30:14,000 Speaker 2: he's socially awkward. I'm like, with us ruined my reputation 643 00:30:14,040 --> 00:30:16,600 Speaker 2: for being cool, and so I accepted that because it 644 00:30:16,640 --> 00:30:19,000 Speaker 2: was immigreed and it was supposed to be this great, 645 00:30:19,400 --> 00:30:22,560 Speaker 2: you know, dinner with women who've been advocating and supporting 646 00:30:22,600 --> 00:30:24,760 Speaker 2: each other, and it turned out to be exactly what it. 647 00:30:24,720 --> 00:30:25,320 Speaker 1: Was to be. 648 00:30:25,480 --> 00:30:27,920 Speaker 2: Yes, loved it. I walk over to the bar and 649 00:30:27,960 --> 00:30:30,200 Speaker 2: I saw you. And that's how truly, I truly did 650 00:30:30,240 --> 00:30:31,640 Speaker 2: feel like I was like, hello. 651 00:30:31,800 --> 00:30:35,520 Speaker 1: Hey, and I turned around and go me, I love 652 00:30:35,600 --> 00:30:36,080 Speaker 1: that hair. 653 00:30:37,640 --> 00:30:40,200 Speaker 2: I mean, well we're like next to you know, talking. 654 00:30:39,880 --> 00:30:43,360 Speaker 1: About love and life everything. Oh my goodness, So you 655 00:30:43,480 --> 00:30:46,200 Speaker 1: because I saw you and I was at that Okay, 656 00:30:46,200 --> 00:30:47,160 Speaker 1: that event, first of all. 657 00:30:47,160 --> 00:30:48,360 Speaker 2: Was incredible efence. 658 00:30:48,440 --> 00:30:50,360 Speaker 1: I was telling someone after it, I'm like a lot 659 00:30:50,360 --> 00:30:51,920 Speaker 1: of times, I don't know if you feel the same 660 00:30:51,920 --> 00:30:54,240 Speaker 1: way you get invited to something that it's like it's 661 00:30:54,240 --> 00:30:56,760 Speaker 1: for women and it doesn't feel warm, and it can 662 00:30:56,800 --> 00:30:59,240 Speaker 1: feel kind of mean girlish if I'm being honest, But 663 00:30:59,280 --> 00:31:01,719 Speaker 1: I am a curious It's such an incredible room, and 664 00:31:01,840 --> 00:31:04,000 Speaker 1: I mean I think that room was such a reflection 665 00:31:04,120 --> 00:31:08,640 Speaker 1: of her because it felt warm. But also the conversation 666 00:31:08,800 --> 00:31:12,840 Speaker 1: we had that night was like so empowering and so insightful. 667 00:31:13,200 --> 00:31:16,760 Speaker 1: But how it started is I said I have when 668 00:31:16,760 --> 00:31:18,480 Speaker 1: you said hide, I have to tell tamor in this. 669 00:31:18,840 --> 00:31:24,840 Speaker 1: So I heard Tamar and tell a story on her show. Yes, okay, 670 00:31:25,400 --> 00:31:27,120 Speaker 1: I'm telling you I'm the button. If you do one, 671 00:31:27,160 --> 00:31:31,320 Speaker 1: I'll do one. Okay. So the jeans are now forming 672 00:31:31,320 --> 00:31:32,680 Speaker 1: to you. It's getting warm. 673 00:31:33,840 --> 00:31:41,120 Speaker 2: Okay, I cannot cry. I can cross like. That's about 674 00:31:41,120 --> 00:31:42,160 Speaker 2: as far as I got. Okay. 675 00:31:42,240 --> 00:31:44,440 Speaker 1: I know that feeling though, when something fits three weeks 676 00:31:44,480 --> 00:31:46,520 Speaker 1: ago and then you you have a little too much 677 00:31:46,560 --> 00:31:48,560 Speaker 1: fun if you will, and it's like, oh, these fit 678 00:31:48,680 --> 00:31:51,800 Speaker 1: like a glove, and now they's like not a glove, 679 00:31:52,880 --> 00:31:53,960 Speaker 1: like a something. 680 00:31:54,040 --> 00:31:54,200 Speaker 3: Yeah. 681 00:31:54,240 --> 00:31:59,840 Speaker 1: I was gonna say, you were right here, so okay, 682 00:31:59,880 --> 00:32:02,360 Speaker 1: So so I walked when we were talking at the party. Yah, 683 00:32:02,360 --> 00:32:03,680 Speaker 1: I got to tell you. I heard you tell the 684 00:32:03,720 --> 00:32:07,240 Speaker 1: story on your show about the parasailing accident you were 685 00:32:07,280 --> 00:32:10,120 Speaker 1: in were you almost drowned and your fiance at the 686 00:32:10,120 --> 00:32:12,960 Speaker 1: time did not even flinch to begin to try to 687 00:32:13,000 --> 00:32:15,160 Speaker 1: save you. And in that moment, you're like, I need 688 00:32:15,200 --> 00:32:16,240 Speaker 1: to break up with this man. 689 00:32:16,280 --> 00:32:18,360 Speaker 2: And I did, and I did. It was many years 690 00:32:18,400 --> 00:32:23,760 Speaker 2: ago in Cosameo, Mexico, parasailing and the parasale broke and 691 00:32:23,840 --> 00:32:27,120 Speaker 2: I had a life jacket on flew out to see splat. 692 00:32:27,560 --> 00:32:30,920 Speaker 2: They circled the speedboat back to come and get me, 693 00:32:31,360 --> 00:32:35,640 Speaker 2: and he just looked over at me while these two 694 00:32:35,760 --> 00:32:38,880 Speaker 2: people who had been speaking English but then suddenly could 695 00:32:38,920 --> 00:32:43,640 Speaker 2: only speak Spanish jumped in to rescue me. No, they 696 00:32:43,640 --> 00:32:46,880 Speaker 2: were like, we're not getting sued. They jumped in though 697 00:32:46,920 --> 00:32:50,680 Speaker 2: at least saved me, proved me. And I'm terrified, and 698 00:32:51,200 --> 00:32:53,440 Speaker 2: I just looked. I remember looking up at that man saying, 699 00:32:53,760 --> 00:32:56,520 Speaker 2: as soon as we get back to Chicago, and I 700 00:32:56,520 --> 00:33:00,800 Speaker 2: said it like that ch cag chgo it's over. 701 00:33:01,120 --> 00:33:02,520 Speaker 1: You Did you say it to him or this. 702 00:33:02,520 --> 00:33:04,200 Speaker 2: Was yeah, I said it in my Facebook. I mean 703 00:33:04,240 --> 00:33:07,200 Speaker 2: I said he saw it. He had to okay, he 704 00:33:07,280 --> 00:33:10,040 Speaker 2: had to have Okay, it was pure. It's a mix 705 00:33:10,080 --> 00:33:15,720 Speaker 2: of disappointment m hm, also though like this is who 706 00:33:15,840 --> 00:33:16,440 Speaker 2: you are? 707 00:33:17,080 --> 00:33:18,320 Speaker 1: You know, It's like all. 708 00:33:18,240 --> 00:33:21,840 Speaker 2: Of these things at once. I'm sure he saw because 709 00:33:21,880 --> 00:33:24,240 Speaker 2: I was going through it. I'm like, first disbelief, Yeah, 710 00:33:24,360 --> 00:33:26,320 Speaker 2: then you're like, wait, this is the guy that I 711 00:33:26,400 --> 00:33:29,600 Speaker 2: might marry Mary, And then it's like, ah, this is 712 00:33:29,640 --> 00:33:33,560 Speaker 2: who you are, okay, and then it's like okay. 713 00:33:33,200 --> 00:33:36,480 Speaker 1: Yeah right. It's one of those moments where you learn 714 00:33:36,720 --> 00:33:39,520 Speaker 1: a lot about a person in a moment of chaos 715 00:33:39,640 --> 00:33:42,920 Speaker 1: or tragedy. Like they say, when you break up with someone, 716 00:33:42,920 --> 00:33:45,640 Speaker 1: the way they behave during a breakup is like who 717 00:33:45,680 --> 00:33:46,600 Speaker 1: they actually are. 718 00:33:46,880 --> 00:33:48,760 Speaker 2: But you had something I. 719 00:33:48,680 --> 00:33:51,600 Speaker 1: Know when I heard your story, I know, first of all, wait, 720 00:33:51,640 --> 00:33:53,400 Speaker 1: how long had you two have been together, Tammer, because 721 00:33:53,400 --> 00:33:54,120 Speaker 1: this is engaged. 722 00:33:54,120 --> 00:33:56,400 Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, that is yours to be a couple 723 00:33:56,440 --> 00:33:56,880 Speaker 2: of years. 724 00:33:57,000 --> 00:33:59,760 Speaker 1: Oh wow, okay, brave and bold. But it was clear 725 00:33:59,800 --> 00:34:01,400 Speaker 1: to you and you broke up as soon as you got. 726 00:34:01,240 --> 00:34:04,720 Speaker 2: Back to that got offed airlines flight whatever that was. 727 00:34:05,000 --> 00:34:09,400 Speaker 1: Because Chicago is the Hubs, that's how we know it 728 00:34:09,440 --> 00:34:13,560 Speaker 1: was united. But my I was in a relationship and 729 00:34:13,680 --> 00:34:16,080 Speaker 1: I had an incident in Lake Como where. 730 00:34:15,920 --> 00:34:20,840 Speaker 4: I beautiful like George Clooney's lake. Yes, George Clue, like 731 00:34:20,880 --> 00:34:25,719 Speaker 4: a dreamy dream dreamers. I mean, the company was not great. 732 00:34:25,760 --> 00:34:28,120 Speaker 4: The company was the person that's like, but it's. 733 00:34:28,080 --> 00:34:33,640 Speaker 1: Lake Como right and bucket lists and it's stunning, stunning, stunning. 734 00:34:33,960 --> 00:34:38,560 Speaker 1: I almost drowned, okay, but like four Norwegian guys save 735 00:34:38,640 --> 00:34:41,759 Speaker 1: me because they teach them, apparently, how to swim from age. 736 00:34:41,800 --> 00:34:44,960 Speaker 1: It's like part of the school system there, which we 737 00:34:45,000 --> 00:34:46,880 Speaker 1: need to do that, and we really should. We should. 738 00:34:46,920 --> 00:34:48,120 Speaker 1: Really a couple of petition. 739 00:34:47,800 --> 00:34:50,000 Speaker 2: Contes do it. It's on their physical education. 740 00:34:50,120 --> 00:34:53,759 Speaker 1: Should I'm sorry, I'm getting to save every time I 741 00:34:53,760 --> 00:34:56,479 Speaker 1: want to run for president. We need to be teaching 742 00:34:56,520 --> 00:35:00,600 Speaker 1: our youth how to swim. That's my platform. But anyway, 743 00:35:00,680 --> 00:35:03,239 Speaker 1: I almost drown. These five Norwegian guys came to say me. 744 00:35:03,280 --> 00:35:05,520 Speaker 1: But the way that the person I was with at 745 00:35:05,520 --> 00:35:08,600 Speaker 1: the time, just like there was this weird tension as 746 00:35:08,640 --> 00:35:11,719 Speaker 1: I was about to drown, not because he was going 747 00:35:11,800 --> 00:35:13,320 Speaker 1: to try to drown me, let me be very clear, 748 00:35:13,560 --> 00:35:15,080 Speaker 1: but it was like, oh, you're not really going to 749 00:35:15,200 --> 00:35:16,200 Speaker 1: try to help me. 750 00:35:16,480 --> 00:35:20,800 Speaker 2: In the way that you could like immediately, and that 751 00:35:21,360 --> 00:35:25,200 Speaker 2: a gender assignment. That is, I am with someone or 752 00:35:25,239 --> 00:35:28,919 Speaker 2: something that I love. That someone or something I love 753 00:35:29,239 --> 00:35:33,360 Speaker 2: is in Harold m h and my instinct. 754 00:35:32,960 --> 00:35:35,520 Speaker 1: My instinct is to like I need to fix this, 755 00:35:35,600 --> 00:35:38,280 Speaker 1: I need to protect this person, which is an interesting 756 00:35:38,320 --> 00:35:41,799 Speaker 1: thing because that was something we would often have a 757 00:35:42,200 --> 00:35:46,000 Speaker 1: conflict about, is like I want to feel like my 758 00:35:46,080 --> 00:35:49,640 Speaker 1: partner their instinct is to protect me. So I saw 759 00:35:49,719 --> 00:35:52,359 Speaker 1: that clip randomly, Look at what God did. I saw 760 00:35:52,360 --> 00:35:55,640 Speaker 1: that clip randomly after that vacation, like weeks, a couple 761 00:35:55,680 --> 00:35:58,600 Speaker 1: months after, maybe maybe months, because that was it was 762 00:35:58,600 --> 00:36:01,880 Speaker 1: a summer vacation July. I saw it and I felt convicted. 763 00:36:02,160 --> 00:36:04,040 Speaker 1: Like if you've ever been to church and the pastors 764 00:36:04,080 --> 00:36:07,400 Speaker 1: preaching and they're like they're talking to me, they know, 765 00:36:07,440 --> 00:36:09,920 Speaker 1: how do they know? Okay? Well, I'm watching the clip 766 00:36:09,920 --> 00:36:11,799 Speaker 1: and I was like, where did this come from? Why 767 00:36:11,880 --> 00:36:13,880 Speaker 1: does Tamar know? Tammar is telling me I need to 768 00:36:13,880 --> 00:36:16,600 Speaker 1: break up with this man? So I broke up with 769 00:36:16,600 --> 00:36:21,359 Speaker 1: someone because of Tamer and Hall, y'all let the record stay, yeah, 770 00:36:22,080 --> 00:36:25,040 Speaker 1: your mom, your mom did it. You're a heartbreaker, booth 771 00:36:25,200 --> 00:36:28,400 Speaker 1: your mom, your mom broke the heart, not me, Okay. 772 00:36:28,880 --> 00:36:31,799 Speaker 1: And and so I was like, I have to tell 773 00:36:31,800 --> 00:36:33,880 Speaker 1: you this because it stuck with me, and I didn't 774 00:36:33,880 --> 00:36:36,000 Speaker 1: do it right away. I didn't do it when we 775 00:36:36,040 --> 00:36:39,080 Speaker 1: got to Chicago because I didn't go to Chicago. I 776 00:36:39,120 --> 00:36:41,040 Speaker 1: wasn't even I wasn't in Chicago, and I wasn't sure, 777 00:36:41,040 --> 00:36:42,799 Speaker 1: but I had this. There were like a number of 778 00:36:42,840 --> 00:36:45,200 Speaker 1: things cause you know, you know, they said, like, you 779 00:36:45,280 --> 00:36:47,520 Speaker 1: know when it's the right person. I feel like you, 780 00:36:47,960 --> 00:36:49,040 Speaker 1: I don't how do you feel about that? 781 00:36:49,080 --> 00:36:50,080 Speaker 2: I don't know if I believe that. 782 00:36:50,200 --> 00:36:51,440 Speaker 1: Oh, I need to talk to about this. 783 00:36:51,520 --> 00:36:55,560 Speaker 2: I think I think circumstances allow you to know if 784 00:36:55,560 --> 00:36:57,560 Speaker 2: they're the right person. I don't know, if I've never 785 00:36:57,600 --> 00:37:01,080 Speaker 2: had a gut feeling, I've like mind my husband and 786 00:37:01,400 --> 00:37:06,200 Speaker 2: we met right when I had when I was let 787 00:37:06,280 --> 00:37:09,239 Speaker 2: go from my job, and I was the first time 788 00:37:09,239 --> 00:37:10,719 Speaker 2: in my life since I was fourteen years old that 789 00:37:10,719 --> 00:37:14,520 Speaker 2: I'd been unemployed. I've worked my entire life. My first 790 00:37:14,600 --> 00:37:16,480 Speaker 2: job was at Toys r Us. I worked in the 791 00:37:16,520 --> 00:37:18,720 Speaker 2: stuffed animal section and worked my way up to cashier. 792 00:37:19,480 --> 00:37:21,680 Speaker 2: So I've had a job my entire life because I 793 00:37:21,680 --> 00:37:24,480 Speaker 2: needed that independence, and I begged my dad to let 794 00:37:24,520 --> 00:37:26,560 Speaker 2: me have the independence of work. So so much of 795 00:37:26,600 --> 00:37:29,640 Speaker 2: my identity was aligned with the independence at work gives. 796 00:37:29,680 --> 00:37:31,520 Speaker 2: I can buy what I want, go where I want, 797 00:37:31,840 --> 00:37:33,600 Speaker 2: you know, blah blah blah. I begged to work when 798 00:37:33,600 --> 00:37:35,440 Speaker 2: I was fourteen two, and my dad refused for a 799 00:37:35,440 --> 00:37:38,600 Speaker 2: long time, and finally he gave in. And back then 800 00:37:38,640 --> 00:37:40,479 Speaker 2: they didn't have any computers because it was one hundred 801 00:37:40,600 --> 00:37:43,600 Speaker 2: years ago, and I forged my age and they were 802 00:37:43,600 --> 00:37:44,720 Speaker 2: like Toys was like, come. 803 00:37:44,640 --> 00:37:47,719 Speaker 1: Up and they are defunct now, so we can't even 804 00:37:47,800 --> 00:37:48,480 Speaker 1: they can't do anything. 805 00:37:49,160 --> 00:37:52,279 Speaker 2: Child labor lost Toys r Us. But you know, I 806 00:37:52,280 --> 00:37:54,319 Speaker 2: was always looking for independence, and so now I'm out 807 00:37:54,320 --> 00:37:56,200 Speaker 2: of work for the very first time in my life 808 00:37:56,440 --> 00:37:58,520 Speaker 2: and my self esteem is managing and all these different 809 00:37:58,520 --> 00:38:00,319 Speaker 2: things that go along when you've lost some thing that 810 00:38:00,360 --> 00:38:03,040 Speaker 2: you think is a dream. And so I ended up. 811 00:38:03,280 --> 00:38:07,080 Speaker 2: I known Stephen for some time from Afar, and then 812 00:38:07,120 --> 00:38:10,200 Speaker 2: I ran into him on It was this funny sergeony 813 00:38:10,320 --> 00:38:13,799 Speaker 2: on a plane. There was my ex and his new 814 00:38:14,520 --> 00:38:16,840 Speaker 2: tall Russian girlfriend sitting behind me. 815 00:38:16,960 --> 00:38:17,600 Speaker 1: Not the ex. 816 00:38:17,400 --> 00:38:21,239 Speaker 2: Set, a different one, another one, and she was a 817 00:38:21,239 --> 00:38:23,239 Speaker 2: beautiful one, because you always picture you're going to see 818 00:38:23,239 --> 00:38:25,000 Speaker 2: your ex and they're gonna be like with one person 819 00:38:25,040 --> 00:38:26,399 Speaker 2: with one two you know. 820 00:38:29,160 --> 00:38:30,919 Speaker 1: A girl's girl, and could be like, no, she was bad. 821 00:38:30,960 --> 00:38:32,920 Speaker 2: She was bad. She was bad as hell, and so 822 00:38:32,960 --> 00:38:35,440 Speaker 2: I'm like, holy moly, this gorgeous woman. And then he 823 00:38:35,640 --> 00:38:38,799 Speaker 2: and I didn't even want him, but now she And 824 00:38:38,840 --> 00:38:41,839 Speaker 2: then I run into Stephen and I used him as 825 00:38:41,840 --> 00:38:44,279 Speaker 2: a decoy. I was gonna say quick, I was like no, 826 00:38:44,360 --> 00:38:45,799 Speaker 2: I was like, just I'm gonna just talk to that. 827 00:38:45,800 --> 00:38:48,399 Speaker 2: That was great to see you. But as time went on, 828 00:38:49,680 --> 00:38:51,600 Speaker 2: we'd run into each other. And then I had that 829 00:38:51,640 --> 00:38:54,600 Speaker 2: situation happen with my prior job, and then I finally 830 00:38:54,640 --> 00:38:56,799 Speaker 2: was able to like to see things I feel even 831 00:38:56,840 --> 00:38:58,720 Speaker 2: though I hope in my heart. I'm a great friend. 832 00:38:59,040 --> 00:39:02,359 Speaker 2: I realized how much time I was focused on work 833 00:39:02,520 --> 00:39:05,960 Speaker 2: and not my friendships. And I called these things my 834 00:39:06,000 --> 00:39:08,399 Speaker 2: love ships, and they fall under a lot of things, right, 835 00:39:08,480 --> 00:39:12,120 Speaker 2: just things I enjoy, right, just taking a respital, walking 836 00:39:12,160 --> 00:39:15,319 Speaker 2: around without responding to two hundred calls from work, and 837 00:39:15,400 --> 00:39:18,080 Speaker 2: just walking New York. I remember when I first moved 838 00:39:18,080 --> 00:39:20,040 Speaker 2: to New York. I could walk from Central Park all 839 00:39:20,040 --> 00:39:22,040 Speaker 2: the way down to Battery Park and my eyes were 840 00:39:22,080 --> 00:39:24,319 Speaker 2: so wide open. Now I'm doing it, and I'm looking 841 00:39:24,360 --> 00:39:25,880 Speaker 2: at my phone because he's working at it. And those 842 00:39:25,880 --> 00:39:27,560 Speaker 2: are important things, don't get me wrong. Because you got 843 00:39:27,560 --> 00:39:29,680 Speaker 2: to put in the numbers to get the score that 844 00:39:29,760 --> 00:39:33,200 Speaker 2: you need, and I get that. But now I didn't 845 00:39:33,200 --> 00:39:35,200 Speaker 2: have the gig. I was able to, like kind of 846 00:39:35,200 --> 00:39:37,600 Speaker 2: focus on relationships. So I'm going back to the core. 847 00:39:37,680 --> 00:39:39,320 Speaker 2: I don't know if you for me anyway. It was 848 00:39:39,360 --> 00:39:42,759 Speaker 2: a gut. It was watching him in these circumstances with 849 00:39:42,960 --> 00:39:47,840 Speaker 2: me right rooting me on as I'm writing the template 850 00:39:47,880 --> 00:39:50,319 Speaker 2: for the Tammeron Hall Show, and I was watching you know, 851 00:39:50,400 --> 00:39:53,080 Speaker 2: MERV Griffin and dinersh. Everyone always thinks you go straight 852 00:39:53,080 --> 00:39:56,280 Speaker 2: to Oprah. I'm like no, I went to I studied, 853 00:39:56,520 --> 00:39:59,600 Speaker 2: Oh my god, so much daytime TV and even down 854 00:39:59,600 --> 00:40:01,880 Speaker 2: to how the seats would be together. I'm sketching and 855 00:40:01,920 --> 00:40:03,680 Speaker 2: I'm going to these rooms and they're like, you got 856 00:40:03,680 --> 00:40:08,399 Speaker 2: a whole sketch. And so he was there. So it 857 00:40:08,480 --> 00:40:13,440 Speaker 2: was the circumstances and him rooting for me, and me 858 00:40:13,800 --> 00:40:17,920 Speaker 2: feeling that that's what because on paper, I wasn't planning 859 00:40:17,920 --> 00:40:20,000 Speaker 2: on being with a five foot four Jewish guy from 860 00:40:20,040 --> 00:40:23,640 Speaker 2: the Bronx. Wasn't not and not just that's a bad thing. 861 00:40:23,960 --> 00:40:27,799 Speaker 2: I feel like I've won the lottery here. But it 862 00:40:27,880 --> 00:40:33,040 Speaker 2: was the circumstances because I think I've had relationships where 863 00:40:33,040 --> 00:40:35,840 Speaker 2: I thought, oh my god, yes, and then you're on 864 00:40:35,880 --> 00:40:40,680 Speaker 2: the side of the boat dying versus you know, putting 865 00:40:40,719 --> 00:40:45,680 Speaker 2: in the work and watching someone root for you, watching 866 00:40:45,960 --> 00:40:49,840 Speaker 2: you know that feeling of God, this person really wants 867 00:40:49,920 --> 00:40:50,600 Speaker 2: me to win. 868 00:40:50,719 --> 00:40:53,840 Speaker 1: And they're for you, and as. 869 00:40:53,680 --> 00:40:56,080 Speaker 2: A result, they become for. 870 00:40:55,880 --> 00:41:00,560 Speaker 1: You, and that's beautiful, and that's actually a word. You 871 00:41:00,640 --> 00:41:04,280 Speaker 1: could have been a lawyer. You're currently an award winning 872 00:41:04,320 --> 00:41:06,480 Speaker 1: talk show host, but I'm just gonna say you could 873 00:41:06,520 --> 00:41:11,359 Speaker 1: also be a preacher, because I'm just saying that's beautifulchurch. 874 00:41:13,200 --> 00:41:16,640 Speaker 1: This has been incredible. I you are. I just am like, 875 00:41:16,719 --> 00:41:19,760 Speaker 1: I'm so honored to know you, my heart. I stand. 876 00:41:20,120 --> 00:41:22,080 Speaker 2: I hope the next time you are in trouble and 877 00:41:22,080 --> 00:41:25,040 Speaker 2: you're about to drown and lay como at the beautiful 878 00:41:25,120 --> 00:41:27,640 Speaker 2: hand of my because I'm gonna be on the vacation 879 00:41:27,680 --> 00:41:33,719 Speaker 2: with you. Okay, No, I can't tell you. I am 880 00:41:33,800 --> 00:41:38,880 Speaker 2: so blown away by your extreme talent, but also and 881 00:41:39,440 --> 00:41:43,560 Speaker 2: dropped at gorgeous. But you you have this incredible energy 882 00:41:43,760 --> 00:41:47,719 Speaker 2: that is illuminating. I truly think I meet a lot 883 00:41:47,719 --> 00:41:50,200 Speaker 2: of people all the time, and I'm very fortunate in 884 00:41:50,239 --> 00:41:54,040 Speaker 2: that way to have lived this very big life, but 885 00:41:54,280 --> 00:41:59,640 Speaker 2: you stand out in this way. That's just it is. 886 00:41:59,680 --> 00:42:02,120 Speaker 2: It's your You know when people say breath of fresh air, 887 00:42:02,800 --> 00:42:05,719 Speaker 2: you are a freaking breath of fresh air. That's why, 888 00:42:05,719 --> 00:42:12,719 Speaker 2: in a monsoon you I brought my whole little six 889 00:42:12,800 --> 00:42:15,560 Speaker 2: year old and let him play nine hours of Monopoly. 890 00:42:15,640 --> 00:42:19,319 Speaker 2: Over there, he's Jonathan Height, the guy who says no 891 00:42:19,400 --> 00:42:22,200 Speaker 2: digital fri kids. Jonathan Hide somewhere is hovering over me, 892 00:42:22,320 --> 00:42:23,200 Speaker 2: judging me as a mom. 893 00:42:23,400 --> 00:42:23,920 Speaker 1: So you are. 894 00:42:24,080 --> 00:42:30,520 Speaker 2: I think that you make entertainment so special and I 895 00:42:30,560 --> 00:42:32,160 Speaker 2: just love you. I could not love you more. I'm 896 00:42:32,200 --> 00:42:32,560 Speaker 2: a fan. 897 00:42:32,800 --> 00:42:34,080 Speaker 1: Thank you. I'm like, I ge't words. 898 00:42:34,120 --> 00:42:35,640 Speaker 2: Are you are my Beyonce? 899 00:42:37,120 --> 00:42:43,560 Speaker 1: What that is? Tam Tameran, thank you so much. I 900 00:42:43,600 --> 00:42:46,160 Speaker 1: am so grateful for you. And honestly, if we had 901 00:42:46,200 --> 00:42:47,719 Speaker 1: more time, I would tell all the people and maybe 902 00:42:47,719 --> 00:42:49,440 Speaker 1: I will on the outro when I record it, when 903 00:42:49,480 --> 00:42:51,400 Speaker 1: you grow, I'll tell all the people all the beautiful 904 00:42:51,440 --> 00:42:54,360 Speaker 1: things you said to me that evening and how inspiring 905 00:42:54,600 --> 00:42:58,680 Speaker 1: and empowering and just authentic and like right here on 906 00:42:58,719 --> 00:43:00,920 Speaker 1: the ground but also in the sky, which I think 907 00:43:01,040 --> 00:43:04,319 Speaker 1: is a hard balance to strike. You are incredible. Thank 908 00:43:04,360 --> 00:43:06,799 Speaker 1: you for doing this. May I ask if you will 909 00:43:06,800 --> 00:43:09,440 Speaker 1: give a listener advice as well? Of course, Okay, we're 910 00:43:09,440 --> 00:43:12,440 Speaker 1: gonna get advice from We're gonna get a listener's request 911 00:43:12,440 --> 00:43:12,840 Speaker 1: for advice. 912 00:43:12,880 --> 00:43:17,600 Speaker 3: Okay, Hi, I'm in middle school. My social studies teacher 913 00:43:18,040 --> 00:43:21,560 Speaker 3: keeps asking really stupid questions that are really poorly worded 914 00:43:21,680 --> 00:43:24,719 Speaker 3: and marking all of the kids answers wrong. How do 915 00:43:24,800 --> 00:43:27,720 Speaker 3: I politely tell her this without getting in trouble? 916 00:43:28,760 --> 00:43:29,200 Speaker 2: Thanks? 917 00:43:30,560 --> 00:43:32,480 Speaker 1: Ooh, tarm It, I'm letting you out. 918 00:43:33,000 --> 00:43:35,320 Speaker 2: That's a funny thing because we just had this conversation 919 00:43:36,719 --> 00:43:40,799 Speaker 2: about being direct or clarifying, like is there a difference? Right? 920 00:43:41,360 --> 00:43:46,319 Speaker 2: I think? So, I think, well, how old? How old 921 00:43:46,320 --> 00:43:46,719 Speaker 2: are you. 922 00:43:46,600 --> 00:43:49,320 Speaker 1: In middle school? I'm gonna say between twelve twelve. 923 00:43:49,520 --> 00:43:52,239 Speaker 2: I you know, first of all, I think you have 924 00:43:52,320 --> 00:43:56,040 Speaker 2: to be polite, and then you have to understand that 925 00:43:56,120 --> 00:44:01,239 Speaker 2: this person controls your grades. So I believe in with kindness. 926 00:44:01,640 --> 00:44:04,720 Speaker 2: I think you say, thank you so much, missus Jones 927 00:44:04,760 --> 00:44:08,080 Speaker 2: for that feedback. But if you can help me understand it, 928 00:44:09,080 --> 00:44:12,600 Speaker 2: I think I can get what you want. So you 929 00:44:12,640 --> 00:44:14,719 Speaker 2: want to you want to work it right. You know, 930 00:44:14,760 --> 00:44:16,400 Speaker 2: it's like missy Elliotson, good. 931 00:44:16,239 --> 00:44:17,879 Speaker 1: Work it, reverse it. 932 00:44:18,200 --> 00:44:20,360 Speaker 2: So you got to you gotta flip it and reverse it, okay, 933 00:44:20,400 --> 00:44:23,160 Speaker 2: because if you go in hot like this is stupid, 934 00:44:23,400 --> 00:44:25,880 Speaker 2: what do you think You're not going to get anywhere? 935 00:44:26,320 --> 00:44:28,560 Speaker 2: So you want to turn on the charm. I think 936 00:44:28,560 --> 00:44:32,000 Speaker 2: you say, you know, I want to understand why you 937 00:44:32,200 --> 00:44:35,040 Speaker 2: marked it up this way because I want to make 938 00:44:35,120 --> 00:44:40,680 Speaker 2: you proud of me because you're my favorite offeness teacher 939 00:44:41,000 --> 00:44:44,839 Speaker 2: in the class or in the school. Oh and I 940 00:44:44,880 --> 00:44:46,600 Speaker 2: want you to be happy. 941 00:44:46,480 --> 00:44:48,000 Speaker 1: Oh my goodness. And I want to Yeah, I want 942 00:44:48,000 --> 00:44:49,320 Speaker 1: to make it. I want to make this. 943 00:44:50,160 --> 00:44:51,560 Speaker 2: I want to get I want to get it right 944 00:44:51,600 --> 00:44:54,960 Speaker 2: the next time. So like, let's erase that she is 945 00:44:55,080 --> 00:44:58,600 Speaker 2: quote unquote doing a bad job, and let's reverse it. 946 00:44:58,880 --> 00:45:01,200 Speaker 2: Because in life, one of the things you're going to 947 00:45:01,239 --> 00:45:03,760 Speaker 2: have to understand. It's I don't know if you like sports, 948 00:45:04,120 --> 00:45:07,319 Speaker 2: but whether you are the quarterback of your team or 949 00:45:07,320 --> 00:45:10,000 Speaker 2: on any team, or at some point in work, you're 950 00:45:10,040 --> 00:45:12,880 Speaker 2: going to lead people. And the easiest way to get 951 00:45:13,080 --> 00:45:16,919 Speaker 2: people to do what you want is to make them 952 00:45:17,120 --> 00:45:20,920 Speaker 2: feel appreciated. And so the skill I want you to 953 00:45:21,000 --> 00:45:23,960 Speaker 2: learn now is one that will make sure your success 954 00:45:24,000 --> 00:45:26,160 Speaker 2: the rest of your life. How do you get people 955 00:45:26,239 --> 00:45:30,200 Speaker 2: to bend to your will? You do it through kindness 956 00:45:30,480 --> 00:45:34,000 Speaker 2: and making them feel that they're important. And she is important. 957 00:45:34,040 --> 00:45:36,799 Speaker 2: She controls your race. Yes, absolutely, So I think you 958 00:45:36,840 --> 00:45:39,360 Speaker 2: have to just say thank you. I just want to 959 00:45:39,440 --> 00:45:41,920 Speaker 2: understand because I want you to be proud and I 960 00:45:41,960 --> 00:45:45,160 Speaker 2: want to give you what you want from me. 961 00:45:45,560 --> 00:45:49,000 Speaker 1: I think that is perfect. I simply will not add 962 00:45:49,040 --> 00:45:51,040 Speaker 1: to it another word from you, misstakeing. 963 00:45:51,120 --> 00:45:53,480 Speaker 2: But I've now taught you to be manipulative. So that's 964 00:45:53,520 --> 00:45:57,960 Speaker 2: a different story. And Tammeran is officially saying manipulation a 965 00:45:58,000 --> 00:46:00,120 Speaker 2: little bit of it, but it's okay because you're your 966 00:46:00,120 --> 00:46:01,839 Speaker 2: heart is good. Yes, your heart is. 967 00:46:01,800 --> 00:46:04,480 Speaker 1: Good, because we can't have you like disrespecting the teacher. 968 00:46:04,600 --> 00:46:05,440 Speaker 1: Now you're with you. 969 00:46:05,520 --> 00:46:07,520 Speaker 2: My mom was a teacher. You can't disrespect your teacher, 970 00:46:07,560 --> 00:46:13,680 Speaker 2: but you can, though connect with her and understand that 971 00:46:14,200 --> 00:46:17,360 Speaker 2: in respecting her, she may not be as clear as 972 00:46:17,400 --> 00:46:19,960 Speaker 2: she thinks she is. And I want to be able 973 00:46:19,960 --> 00:46:20,919 Speaker 2: to give you what you want. 974 00:46:21,160 --> 00:46:25,200 Speaker 1: I think that's beautiful. That is sound advice, sage wisdom. 975 00:46:25,239 --> 00:46:27,880 Speaker 1: If you ask me, Tamrin, thank you so much for 976 00:46:27,960 --> 00:46:34,160 Speaker 1: being here. I love you, Love you, love you. That 977 00:46:34,480 --> 00:46:38,080 Speaker 1: was an absolutely delightful conversation with miss timerin Hall. If 978 00:46:38,120 --> 00:46:41,800 Speaker 1: I can say so myself, she is just so wise, 979 00:46:42,000 --> 00:46:44,759 Speaker 1: so brilliant, and honestly. At that event where I met her, 980 00:46:45,280 --> 00:46:48,480 Speaker 1: she was just as delightful as she was today on 981 00:46:48,560 --> 00:46:53,480 Speaker 1: the podcast. Spoke with so much insight and wisdom and clarity, 982 00:46:53,560 --> 00:46:55,680 Speaker 1: and I just was like holding onto her every word. 983 00:46:55,960 --> 00:46:59,160 Speaker 1: I'm so glad she was a guest today. I am 984 00:46:59,480 --> 00:47:03,319 Speaker 1: immensely grateful for her. And how Moses You're gonna see 985 00:47:03,360 --> 00:47:05,480 Speaker 1: you've seen the picture of Moses at this point, just 986 00:47:05,520 --> 00:47:11,960 Speaker 1: an adorable, sweet, precious soul, so happy that Tamerine was here. Bye, 987 00:47:12,640 --> 00:47:15,000 Speaker 1: Thanks Dad. Is a production of Will Ferrell's Big Money 988 00:47:15,000 --> 00:47:18,680 Speaker 1: Players and iHeart Podcasts. I'm Your Host AEGO wodem Our 989 00:47:18,719 --> 00:47:22,279 Speaker 1: producer is Kevin Bartelt, and our executive producer is Matt 990 00:47:22,280 --> 00:47:22,880 Speaker 1: Appadaka