Speaker 1: The Nicky Glaser Podcast, Nicki Glaser.
Speaker 2: Here's Nikki.
Speaker 3: Hello here, I am welcome to the show. It's Nicki
Speaker 3: Glazer Podcast. Happy Labor Day weekend. I hope you had
Speaker 3: a good one. I am joined today by Brian Frangie.
Speaker 1: Hi, Brian, Hello, Welcome to the show. Everybody. That's me
Speaker 1: welcoming to the show. Also, yeah, there you go.
Speaker 3: Noah's also here.
Speaker 2: Hey, Noah, welcome to the shows. Me welcoming everybody.
Speaker 3: And then that's the laughter of my birthday boy, my
Speaker 3: little baby baby birthday boy, mebe Bb, my boyfriend, my lover,
Speaker 3: my special guy whose birthday is today. It's Chris Convy.
Speaker 4: Everyone's welcoming you to the show. Yeah.
Speaker 3: And Anya is not here today because she's filming a
Speaker 3: music video in Rhode Island on a book. Oh wow,
Speaker 3: she'll tell us all about that when she gets back.
Speaker 3: We get Chris Convey today. He came to visit me.
Speaker 3: I'm very excited about it. He came in. What day
Speaker 3: did you get here? On Sunday? And uh, we have
Speaker 3: a fun week planned of we have an activity for
Speaker 3: your birthday and Thursday. This sucks when I have like
Speaker 3: a birthday present that's coming two days after his birthday,
Speaker 3: because today's birthday and I literally have nothing for you
Speaker 3: except kisses. No.
Speaker 5: I think that's fine. Really, I think you've got time
Speaker 5: to give somebody a gift. Personally, it doesn't matter to
Speaker 5: me either way, but I think, yeah, how are you
Speaker 5: supposed to like line up something perfect on somebody's birthday
Speaker 5: in this day and age?
Speaker 4: Am I right?
Speaker 1: Brood?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 6: No, it's hard, but I do know that you don't
Speaker 6: say happy birthday to Chris Convey. Chris Convey says hello
Speaker 6: to you.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 6: Yeah, so you know you can't call, you can't text.
Speaker 6: He's got a you and if he doesn't call.
Speaker 4: You on his let's explain.
Speaker 3: Will you explain it?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 5: I mean okay, yeah, yeah, I can explain this. So,
Speaker 5: I mean I think when I was younger, this is
Speaker 5: like twenty years old, this whole thing. People were obsessed
Speaker 5: with their birthdays and then they were upset, Oh, you
Speaker 5: missed my birthday, And if you miss somebody's birthday, it's
Speaker 5: this big ordeal and somebody's like, oh, I'm sad you
Speaker 5: And everybody just loves their birthday so much. So the
Speaker 5: deal I was making with my friends was don't you
Speaker 5: don't ever have to remember my birthday, I will. I
Speaker 5: will call you on my birthday, and you go ahead
Speaker 5: and call me on your birthday. So now on my birthday,
Speaker 5: I'll call you. Know, but basically everybody in my everybody
Speaker 5: in my phone that I care about, will get some
Speaker 5: sort of a phone call to be like, hey, you
Speaker 5: never had to remember this.
Speaker 4: Yep, you shouldn't have to. I'm taking that off your plate.
Speaker 3: Right, and so he it would be it's a funny thing.
Speaker 3: So Chris would call everyone in his phone book on
Speaker 3: his birthday, and then if they didn't call him on
Speaker 3: their birthday, he would have no love lost because that's
Speaker 3: the rule.
Speaker 4: That's the rule. Like who cares about birthdays?
Speaker 3: Well, clearly, I mean it's.
Speaker 5: And it's it's effectively made my birthday like a very
Speaker 5: very busy day that you used to hate a lot.
Speaker 3: I used to loathe it because we would just it
Speaker 3: would be Chris on the It's like what Chris was
Speaker 3: doing a deal in on Wall Street in the nineties
Speaker 3: on his birthday.
Speaker 4: Like he was on the.
Speaker 3: Phone on the floor trying to sell and buy all
Speaker 3: day long.
Speaker 4: I'm not kidding you, all day long.
Speaker 3: We would go to dinner for his birthday, and he
Speaker 3: would have to step out and just collect these calls
Speaker 3: or call people all because you'd go through his imaginic
Speaker 3: going through your whole contact list. Here's most people don't
Speaker 3: pick up here.
Speaker 4: Here's the Beauty's good. It's good. His birthday celebrations Thursday. Yeah,
Speaker 4: actually going to work out. It is because I don't
Speaker 4: have I don't have the time.
Speaker 5: So the beauty of it is, like, I'm pretty bad
Speaker 5: at keeping up with everybody. I'm pretty bad. I don't
Speaker 5: I don't love phone calls. You know, I'm not good
Speaker 5: at responding to texts. But this is one day of
Speaker 5: the year that I'll just get to say hi to
Speaker 5: as many people as I can. And we both have
Speaker 5: laughs about it. Sometimes they won't pick up, and then
Speaker 5: I just get to leave a message and get to yes.
Speaker 3: But it's, oh, that's sweet.
Speaker 4: There is something beautiful about it that has emerged.
Speaker 1: How many people are you calling?
Speaker 5: You think I don't know my friendship group it's seven
Speaker 5: seven thousand.
Speaker 1: Wow, it's a lot thousand.
Speaker 3: It's all day long.
Speaker 4: No, I bet it's the it's in the hundreds.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's a lot of calls, like a telemarketer all
Speaker 3: day long, Yeah, I should get you a little cubicle,
Speaker 3: little headset.
Speaker 6: I do the same thing on my birthday at a
Speaker 6: Chris does, except I do it the day after and
Speaker 6: I call people and go, oh see, you didn't remember.
Speaker 1: My birthday, did you. I'll look at you nothing, not
Speaker 1: even a little text.
Speaker 3: How many calls have you gotten today already? Or how
Speaker 3: many calls? Wait, zero calls today, but I've in some text?
Speaker 3: But how like, aren't there friends that you don't that
Speaker 3: you go over a year of not talking to or
Speaker 3: not even thinking of that you still.
Speaker 4: Love those people?
Speaker 5: Yes, of course yes, And you know it's like it's
Speaker 5: it's sort of a nice thing to have a yearly
Speaker 5: check in to be like, hey, we're still buds.
Speaker 3: But some of these people, Chris, you gotta talk like
Speaker 3: they're dying to talk to you, right, And they're just
Speaker 3: people that like you. There are some people that you
Speaker 3: call on your birthday and I know for a fact
Speaker 3: you're like, I would love this conversation be four minutes long,
Speaker 3: but it ends up being like forty minutes.
Speaker 5: This is the this is the game we're playing. Nothing,
Speaker 5: nothing's forty minutes. Nobody does Okay, everybody knows they go hey.
Speaker 5: Some of the guys will pick up and be like, hey,
Speaker 5: I know you got a bunch of calls. I'll talk
Speaker 5: to you later, Okay, cool. Yeah, it's do you.
Speaker 2: Ever get any like passive aggressive responses like oh yeah,
Speaker 2: it's been a really it's been like a year since
Speaker 2: I've heard from that.
Speaker 5: No. People at this point, if you're if I'm friends
Speaker 5: with you, they know they sort of they know the drill,
Speaker 5: and they sometimes they it's it's funny. They're like they'll
Speaker 5: pick up and make hey man, I'm heard from you
Speaker 5: while and I'm like, hey, you know.
Speaker 4: What day it is?
Speaker 5: And they go I forget every year, like they even
Speaker 5: forget when they're getting the phone call. Or some people
Speaker 5: pick up and be like I know what this is
Speaker 5: all about. Yeah, because I don't call anybody. I call
Speaker 5: nobody ever.
Speaker 3: But if for somebody who says they don't like birthdays,
Speaker 3: you always celebrate mine in such a genuine way. Are
Speaker 3: you just doing that because you think it matters to me?
Speaker 3: Or like do you I think you somebody? I don't.
Speaker 4: It's not that I don't like birthdays, it's that there
Speaker 4: was an era, like you remember when you were in
Speaker 4: your like twenties and everybody was so stoked on their birthday.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like that was the event of the birthday
Speaker 3: month when girls would say, it's my birthday month. Thankfully
Speaker 3: that's that ship is sales.
Speaker 4: So that was me taking the power back.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I get what you're saying. It's that was annoying.
Speaker 3: I don't like when people tell you my birthdays this
Speaker 3: like they like they're they're like people in their thirties
Speaker 3: or forties telling you their birthday is this week, like
Speaker 3: you're an adult, Like.
Speaker 4: Who cares about your li is insane? Nobody cares.
Speaker 3: It's really weird. It's really weird, and but I think
Speaker 3: it is nice. You know what I like about a
Speaker 3: calendar year. It is exactly long enough where you go, okay,
Speaker 3: it's time to celebrate again, Like it is a perfect
Speaker 3: if it was two days, if it was three hundred
Speaker 3: and sixty three days, you go, didn't we just do
Speaker 3: this forever? It's a perfect amount of time where when
Speaker 3: it rolls around again, you go, this is just enough
Speaker 3: time that it's time for this again.
Speaker 4: I'm talking Valentine's Day, I'm taking birthdays.
Speaker 3: I'm talking Halloween's Like if you were a month shorter,
Speaker 3: like let's say, like a couple of weeks short. Christmas. Yeah,
Speaker 3: I don't acknowledge well Christmas, Yeah, Christmas is. I like
Speaker 3: Christmas being celebrated a whole month. I like getting into
Speaker 3: that spirit. I'm not someone who's like, what, they're already
Speaker 3: Christmas music playing. I'm like, yes, it's playing. Let's get
Speaker 3: in the spirit. And I know that some people in
Speaker 3: this podcast are Jewish and are probably like.
Speaker 2: I love Christmas time, you do. I think Christmas time
Speaker 2: is like a Jewish person's favorite time in America at least,
Speaker 2: it's so everything's so nice, jolly, and like all of
Speaker 2: our holidays are like based off of like sad events
Speaker 2: or you know, like she's overcoming something. But I don't know,
Speaker 2: just Christmas, I guess I don't really know the full
Speaker 2: story behind it, but it just seems like very jolly.
Speaker 1: You don't know the full story behind Christmas.
Speaker 3: Jesus, I don't know what.
Speaker 4: I think.
Speaker 5: This podcast just became the story of Jesus.
Speaker 4: What do you think that if he rose or died.
Speaker 1: Or what do you think Christmas is about?
Speaker 3: Well? One knows.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's the birth of Jesus. But like the whole
Speaker 2: thing with Santa Claus. I don't know how he comes
Speaker 2: into the picture.
Speaker 1: Well, that's just a pagan thing, I think.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know about Santa either.
Speaker 6: Every time there's a thing like that is because of
Speaker 6: the Pagans. Anything anything that's fun, the Pagan's added it
Speaker 6: at some point.
Speaker 4: Yeah, we just took.
Speaker 3: I want to do a little bit of a if
Speaker 3: you're listening around children to like turn oh yeah, yeah,
Speaker 3: because I will just say that one of my favorite things. Well,
Speaker 3: Chris could tell the story, but first I just want
Speaker 3: to say I didn't find out about that thing not
Speaker 3: being what it was, that man being not that man,
Speaker 3: and maybe two people in kahoots until I was in
Speaker 3: fifth grade.
Speaker 4: It's something isn't real.
Speaker 3: Yes, but I knew let me just say I knew
Speaker 3: it wasn't Probably around fourth grade it was confirmed and
Speaker 3: ever for.
Speaker 5: Me, hold on, I'm sorry, who is listening to this
Speaker 5: podcast around kids?
Speaker 3: I don't know, Like the people have things on around
Speaker 3: their kids to school, and they have it on like
Speaker 3: the morning radio. Oh really, yeah, I'm not like talking
Speaker 3: about you know, uh d's and b's and BJ's and we.
Speaker 6: Did talk about v's and uh p's and a couple
Speaker 6: other letters that certainly a kid, I wouldn't want my
Speaker 6: kid hear, and if I had.
Speaker 3: A kid, I'm sorry. Kids should be able to know
Speaker 3: about p's and v's, We just should know about them
Speaker 3: going into.
Speaker 6: Well, they should also be able to know about SC's
Speaker 6: as well.
Speaker 1: Then if they're going to be known about c's, what
Speaker 1: you're talking about.
Speaker 3: Oh SC's, Oh yeah, Well, I think that you should
Speaker 3: tell your kids about sc like almost immediately and say
Speaker 3: there's this thing that a lot of like, I just
Speaker 3: think it's the biggest such an I know. And then
Speaker 3: they ruin it for everyone, you know what, everyone needs
Speaker 3: to ruin it for everyone because it is an amazing
Speaker 3: thing to like, like to believe and it's fun. But
Speaker 3: it's the same as like kids do kids believe cartoons
Speaker 3: are a real world, and is there a moment where
Speaker 3: they go, no, it's not real, like they I think
Speaker 3: in the beginning they kind of assume that this is
Speaker 3: a place that exists, and then that there there's not
Speaker 3: a moment wherever we go we have to sit down
Speaker 3: and tell you that Barney's not real or like Bluie
Speaker 3: isn't real. So why can't we do that with this
Speaker 3: where it's like it's just a thing that we talk about,
Speaker 3: but we don't like sell it so goddamn hard and
Speaker 3: we keep it and then there's this moment where we're like,
Speaker 3: we have to tell you Santa's gay, Like we have
Speaker 3: to sit you down and be like we have to
Speaker 3: you know what I mean, Like we have to tell you,
Speaker 3: like it's a coming, Like it's a serious conversation where
Speaker 3: your parents are like, we're letting you're becoming an adult
Speaker 3: now and we're ruining.
Speaker 6: Yeah, that part weird for you. I wonder at what
Speaker 6: age is a good age because if you do it
Speaker 6: young enough then because you have to take into account
Speaker 6: you don't want your kid to go to school and
Speaker 6: be like, guess what, Santa isn't real and all the
Speaker 6: other kids cry, and it's just you don't want your
Speaker 6: kid to be that kid. And when you're that young,
Speaker 6: you can't help it if you have a secret that
Speaker 6: juicy come on, so.
Speaker 3: You got to parents are like beating their children while
Speaker 3: also being like and Santa's real. They're fighting with their
Speaker 3: husband and throwing glasses at him and saying, you motherfucker,
Speaker 3: you don't do anything for this family, like screaming and
Speaker 3: then they're also like but Sanna comes down the chimney
Speaker 3: and like, so kids have to live in this like
Speaker 3: really real world where their parents are like just guttural alcoholics.
Speaker 3: And I stole that word from Rachel Feinstein. It's not
Speaker 3: a real world, but it goes perfect with alcoholic and
Speaker 3: where are being screamed out every day and beaten and
Speaker 3: in abuse. Like kids live in like this. Some kids
Speaker 3: are you know, have to witness horrible things, horrible adult
Speaker 3: things before they're ready. But then they Santa's reel and
Speaker 3: you go to school and you make little stockings and
Speaker 3: you draw turkey in your hand, and it's like, weird,
Speaker 3: Why why do we keep this up?
Speaker 6: Are your parents getting are you guys getting divorced? Yeah,
Speaker 6: we're getting divorced. But the tooth fairy is still going
Speaker 6: to go to bull houses?
Speaker 4: Yes, yes, like when.
Speaker 3: Anyway, my sister found out about the Big O' hoax
Speaker 3: in third grade and she came home and my parents
Speaker 3: were kept lying to me. I would confront my parents
Speaker 3: and say, I know it's not real, Like Dad, it's
Speaker 3: not And I would see his foot shake rapidly he
Speaker 3: crossed his leg and his foot would shake and he go, Sant,
Speaker 3: what do you think it is?
Speaker 4: That's what he asked, what do you think?
Speaker 3: And I go, well, I think it's he's not, and
Speaker 3: he go, well he is, and I knew he was lying,
Speaker 3: and I was just like, this guy's full of shit.
Speaker 3: I can't trust that man for anything. I can't believe
Speaker 3: I ever let him take me in a kayak and
Speaker 3: a river, like this guy is not trustworthy. And then
Speaker 3: I knew he was lying, but I kept it up
Speaker 3: for my sister. So then I was vigilant about not
Speaker 3: letting my sister watch any adult TV because I thought
Speaker 3: adults were gonna give it away all the time. So
Speaker 3: I kept up the ruse and let my parents believe
Speaker 3: I believed, and then also so my sister would still
Speaker 3: believe because she was younger. And so I remember them
Speaker 3: all being like, let's watch SNL. Like I was in
Speaker 3: fifth grade, my sister's in third and they're like, we're
Speaker 3: gonna watch SNL. And I was like, we can't watch
Speaker 3: it because I was I knew SNL was adult in comedy,
Speaker 3: and I was like, we can't. And I couldn't say
Speaker 3: why though to anyone, because I couldn't tell my parents.
Speaker 4: I know so much trauma from Santa Claus so much.
Speaker 3: And then one day my sister came home from third
Speaker 3: grade because her teacher, Missus Wright, who was a black woman.
Speaker 3: Because in the black community, they do not lie to
Speaker 3: those their kids that late, at least in the Saint
Speaker 3: Louis black community in the nineties, they are not keep
Speaker 3: or whenever. This woman grew up in the Saint Louis
Speaker 3: in the nineties, they were not telling their kids into
Speaker 3: third grade that Santa was real. So she this black
Speaker 3: woman working in a little like white white, you know school,
Speaker 3: elementary school. The kids were like, Sanna's coming. And she goes, oh,
Speaker 3: sorry to burst your bubble. Kids.
Speaker 4: She said, burst her bubble. I'll never forget it.
Speaker 3: And the parents went fuck. She goes, but Sanna's not real.
Speaker 3: The parents went wild. She was nearly fired. My sister
Speaker 3: comes home from school, Missus Wright's class in third grade.
Speaker 3: My mom's at the sewing machine. I'm sitting there watching
Speaker 3: Save by the Bell or some shit. My sister walks
Speaker 3: in from the bus and she puts on her back
Speaker 3: back and she goes, I know Santa isn't real.
Speaker 4: And my mom goes, well, now you know, and I
Speaker 4: go that was it.
Speaker 3: That's it.
Speaker 4: That's all you had to say.
Speaker 3: And I'm kind of heartbroken because now it's kind of
Speaker 3: very much confirmed. And I was in fifth grade and
Speaker 3: I had fought for Santa and was embarrassed in front
Speaker 3: of all my classmates for two years. At that point
Speaker 3: fifth grade, Tyler Schoonover was like, Sanna's not real, and
Speaker 3: I was just like, yeah, I know, but it, deep
Speaker 3: in my heart, I knew that. He was like, it
Speaker 3: was just this. It was exhausting, let alone keeping my
Speaker 3: sister from being kidnapped with my which my parents also
Speaker 3: didn't seem to care about. I was the only one
Speaker 3: who seemed to care about that, keeping her safe from pedophiles.
Speaker 3: I was obsessed with it and like, wouldn't let her
Speaker 3: roam around neighborhood. My parents were like, let her go,
Speaker 3: and I'm like, she's gonna get kidnapped. I'm smart enough
Speaker 3: not to get kidnapped, but this little girl, she's too trusting.
Speaker 3: So I was obsessed with that, and then it all
Speaker 3: culminates to me at my sister's wedding.
Speaker 4: Oh I'm a little.
Speaker 5: Confused now because I thought you, I thought your sister
Speaker 5: knew Santa was he.
Speaker 3: Was the one that told me and confirmed it, though
Speaker 3: I never had real confirmation, but I kind of knew,
Speaker 3: you know what I mean, Like I knew that I was.
Speaker 3: I was gasolating myself into believing.
Speaker 4: Still, Okay, okay, gotcha.
Speaker 3: Because I no one ever really told me, but I
Speaker 3: was like ninety percent sure. And then my sister was
Speaker 3: one that was like one hundred percent. Backpack on the floor.
Speaker 3: Santa's not real. Done, deal you, Zach Morris?
Speaker 6: If the reverse would be worse? If a parent tells
Speaker 6: the kid that Santa Claus is not real and then
Speaker 6: does all of these things to try to make it
Speaker 6: seem like it's real, like dressed.
Speaker 3: Like track boots through the house and leave ashes and
Speaker 3: to all this weird serial killer ship.
Speaker 6: Yeah, but imagine if you're if you see the boots
Speaker 6: and you see you're four years old, you see the boots,
Speaker 6: you see someone came in and ate a piece of cookie,
Speaker 6: and you're like Santa Israel and your parents like, no,
Speaker 6: he's not.
Speaker 1: I don't know what you're talking about. Wouldn't that be worse?
Speaker 3: No, it is worse because then you put on your
Speaker 3: usual suspects it and you realize your parents have been
Speaker 3: doing a lie the entire time, but went to these
Speaker 3: and they kind of feel bad because you were, like,
Speaker 3: you realize all the times that you never gave parents
Speaker 3: your credit for the gifts they got you, and you
Speaker 3: were like, Sana killed it this year, Mom, you blew it.
Speaker 3: Like this doll you gave me sucks, But this pizza thrower,
Speaker 3: teenageing Ninja Turtle's.
Speaker 4: Rules, Sanna nailed it. You blew it, mom, you know.
Speaker 3: Okay, So when we come back, we'll tell you the
Speaker 3: story that Chris has about me and Santa. And I'm
Speaker 3: sure we put told it on the pod before, but
Speaker 3: we need to tell it again because now with Chris.
Speaker 3: Oh okay, good, all right, we'll be back after this.
Speaker 3: All right, we're back, Chris. So, what happened?
Speaker 5: So Nicky's sister's wedding, Nicki gave whatever what's the speech there?
Speaker 4: I mean the maid of honor speech, Like.
Speaker 3: It was like a reception for a wedding she had
Speaker 3: two years prior. That was like a she really shocked
Speaker 3: what it was wedding. Yeah, it was just a reception.
Speaker 3: There was no ceremony.
Speaker 4: Oh god, I didn't remember it like that.
Speaker 5: Well, Nicki gave a speech at the wedding and during
Speaker 5: the wedding, and she said all these wonderful things about Lauren,
Speaker 5: but about how she was, you know, you know, more
Speaker 5: advanced in some ways, immature or whatever it was. And
Speaker 5: one of the things she said at this reception where
Speaker 5: there were aunts and aunt's children and uncles children, like
Speaker 5: there was kids. There's kids at the wedding. Yeah, Nicky goes,
Speaker 5: Lauren found out Santa Claus wasn't real before me, And
Speaker 5: like moms were like putting their their heads.
Speaker 4: Some bubbles that day.
Speaker 5: First, many bubbles that in the bathroom and it was controversial.
Speaker 4: Kids were crying in the bathroom. Aunts were mad at NICKI. Yep,
Speaker 4: it was. It turned out to be like kind of
Speaker 4: the talk of the wedding.
Speaker 3: They had to learn somehow, coffee, They had to learn somehow.
Speaker 3: I mean, I was making this point about my sister
Speaker 3: being just like always feeling like an older sister me.
Speaker 3: She kissed a boy before me, she got a boyfriend
Speaker 3: before me, she lost her virgin I didn't say the
Speaker 3: virginity part, but that's true too. She was plucking her
Speaker 3: eyebrows before me and had to be like, hey, big sis,
Speaker 3: get over, your eyebrows are problematic, let's like fix them.
Speaker 3: She was always like it more advanced and wore makeup
Speaker 3: before me, just knew what to do before me. And
Speaker 3: then also the Santa Claus thing I just threw in
Speaker 3: not thinking, but you know what, they got to learn somehow,
Speaker 3: and this is like, I'll bring it back to something else.
Speaker 3: People go like, no, spoiler alert, isn't the shock of
Speaker 3: And I know everyone's gonna say, no, it's not. We
Speaker 3: want to learn spoilers like in the movie itself the
Speaker 3: way the director wanted us to learn the spoiler. But
Speaker 3: let's say I tell someone tells me like, oh, the
Speaker 3: end of the sixth Sense or whatever is this thing?
Speaker 3: Isn't the shock of me finding that out? Then? Also
Speaker 3: the same surprise if I would in the movie.
Speaker 5: Not at all, because if you don't know what's happened
Speaker 5: and leading up to the sixth the sixth sense is
Speaker 5: like the perfect example to not use. That's a good boy,
Speaker 5: because the whole movie is completely ruined if you know.
Speaker 3: But I'm like, isn't this a good surprise too? Of
Speaker 3: you finding out just from listening overhearing this conversation.
Speaker 4: Isn't that like also pretty.
Speaker 3: Good of like whoa damn you know, like you did.
Speaker 3: You have to find out the way everyone else did.
Speaker 3: Now you could have a different experience by watching the
Speaker 3: whole movie.
Speaker 5: You gave them a gift Christmas came those games.
Speaker 6: You're trying to tell me this all the time that
Speaker 6: the last few weeks, and I'm not buying it.
Speaker 1: I'm not buying it. Every time I'm like, no, I
Speaker 1: spoiler thing. I need you to spoiler thing.
Speaker 6: Because Nicky's got a lot of spoilers that she's holding
Speaker 6: over my head and she's thankfully not giving them up
Speaker 6: yet because every time she goes can I just.
Speaker 3: Tell you I like spoiling things for people? I really don't,
Speaker 3: but I do argue that when they come out, I go,
Speaker 3: aren't you surprised now, just in the same way you
Speaker 3: would be then, Like, just in this moment, instead of
Speaker 3: being mad at me.
Speaker 2: I wanted to defend Nikki on this because we do
Speaker 2: drop a lot of spoilers on this podcast, and some
Speaker 2: people take the spoiler alert. Some people are like, oh,
Speaker 2: they give away too much of plot. If a TV
Speaker 2: show or a movie is good, then the spoilers won't matter.
Speaker 2: You would still enjoy it.
Speaker 5: Like there's something I forget there's something unforgettable about that
Speaker 5: moment in Sixth Sense, or there's a moment in The Departed.
Speaker 5: There's just there's something that they the director intended, Like
Speaker 5: Brian said that that that we were led into on
Speaker 5: purpose to elicit a certain reaction, and that that is
Speaker 5: something that is stolen no matter what if there is
Speaker 5: a spoiler on a show. Now, some spoilers aren't that
Speaker 5: big of a deal and don't ruin anything, right, you know.
Speaker 5: But if you're like, oh, this character dies and you're like, hey,
Speaker 5: you'll get that feeling early and early on the movie anyway,
Speaker 5: well then fine.
Speaker 6: But like spoiler alerts, did you guys know that? And
Speaker 6: dude wears my car? They don't find the car.
Speaker 3: I kind of forget that. But if something happens within
Speaker 3: the first half hour of the movie, it's not a spoiler.
Speaker 3: Shut up, like this is that's not I don't think
Speaker 3: that that's something that people should be able to get
Speaker 3: mad about.
Speaker 5: Spoiler alert dude wears my car only movie I've ever
Speaker 5: walked out on.
Speaker 3: Really, yeah, I thought it was pretty funny.
Speaker 5: Were you Just Like when I was with a bunch
Speaker 5: of friends and they were like, this is terrible, we're
Speaker 5: out of here and I and I was just like, Okay,
Speaker 5: I guess we're leaving, and they got up to leave
Speaker 5: and I will.
Speaker 3: Santa isn't really.
Speaker 4: And then I never. I never.
Speaker 5: I've never walked out of a movie since then, because
Speaker 5: I was like, this feels wrong.
Speaker 3: I have trivia for Noah, Noah, what's the last movie
Speaker 3: I walked out of? I've probably said it so many
Speaker 3: times that I would think, you know, and if you
Speaker 3: don't know, then I'll say it again, because this is
Speaker 3: the test of if something's been said too many times
Speaker 3: on the podcast, you know what, I feel like I
Speaker 3: know so much about you, but I don't remember this fact.
Speaker 3: Horrible Bosses was the last time I walked out of him.
Speaker 3: I was so mad about it because I'm like, just
Speaker 3: quit your boss sucks.
Speaker 4: This is the I know.
Speaker 3: This is like the thing of like just call him,
Speaker 3: you know, like when people are in movies where you
Speaker 3: go you don't have to just go, you know, take
Speaker 3: a train in the middle of the night to tell
Speaker 3: him you love him, just like call him and then
Speaker 3: the movie would be over with these easy fixes. But
Speaker 3: that movie, I was like, stop killing your boss, just
Speaker 3: just quit and I didn't like Jennifer Aniston being so
Speaker 3: sexual I like need It was me being like puritanical
Speaker 3: about her, of like, I don't like her being such
Speaker 3: an evil sex pot, right, I just need her the
Speaker 3: way that I want her. And for whatever reason, it
Speaker 3: bugged me. And also dinner for schmucks. I almost didn't
Speaker 3: make it through, but I did stay. But I will
Speaker 3: walk out of a movie without any problem, No way.
Speaker 1: I rarely, rarely ever walk out of movie.
Speaker 6: In fact, I can only remember walking out of one
Speaker 6: movie ever, and it is how long ago?
Speaker 1: Was it came out in?
Speaker 5: Uh?
Speaker 1: It came out in two thousand and four?
Speaker 3: So I was like a teenager trying to guess what
Speaker 3: it is?
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, go ahead, Okay.
Speaker 3: Is it a comedy?
Speaker 4: Yes?
Speaker 3: Is it starring a is it? Does it pass the
Speaker 3: Bechdel test?
Speaker 4: No way? Two thousand chicken?
Speaker 1: Probably not.
Speaker 6: I kind of remember us with my high school friends,
Speaker 6: and I remember we all decided we're gonna we're gonna
Speaker 6: walk out old school.
Speaker 1: No.
Speaker 4: Does it star someone that is in old school? Is
Speaker 4: it embarrassing? Now?
Speaker 3: That?
Speaker 4: Is it like a classic?
Speaker 2: Now?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 6: I actually you probably should stop guessing, because I doubtly
Speaker 6: even remember this movie.
Speaker 1: It is called Welcome to Mooseport.
Speaker 6: No, that it was Ray Romano's attempt at making a
Speaker 6: full feature length film Ray Gene Hackman, and man, I
Speaker 6: was like, I can't even believe this is on a screen,
Speaker 6: Like how does this make it to the screen?
Speaker 5: Of course that was that was Peek Romano though, right, yeah,
Speaker 5: that was like everybody loves Raymonds.
Speaker 3: Yeah, everyone loved him.
Speaker 4: But except for Brian.
Speaker 3: I just like, of course, Chris, I don't think you
Speaker 3: walk out of things. You're a completionist, You like will
Speaker 3: finish something. Because suits, have you talked?
Speaker 4: Have you guys talked about suits on this podcast?
Speaker 2: I think we have you watching suits. We know you
Speaker 2: watched four days of television.
Speaker 3: Chris is not added up suits amount of days.
Speaker 4: Chris is not alone millions it is.
Speaker 6: It is one of the most watched shows on Netflix
Speaker 6: right now. It's crazy and I don't even want to
Speaker 6: talk about it because I don't want to continue promoting
Speaker 6: this show.
Speaker 1: I mean, it just feels like insane.
Speaker 3: The one thing I'll say that I love when whenever
Speaker 3: suits comes up on Chris's show, The Courtney Show, which
Speaker 3: is a podcast I listened to every freaking day, and
Speaker 3: I love it so much. But when Suits comes up
Speaker 3: on there there's someone that like knew is watching it
Speaker 3: or something because Chris gets people into suits because it's
Speaker 3: what did you say, It's the center of television kind
Speaker 3: of like Nxbox twenty is the center of me.
Speaker 5: It's yes, there is like Okay, when you think about suits,
Speaker 5: you think, is this this is like one of those
Speaker 5: USA shows characters welcome. You look at it and you're like,
Speaker 5: is this Franklin and Bash or or like the doctor
Speaker 5: on like they moved to the Hamptons, but but he
Speaker 5: got like disbarred, but he like helps rich people like
Speaker 5: be okay, psych psych. Yeah, notice now you think like, okay,
Speaker 5: you look at Susan you say, this is just another
Speaker 5: one of those terrible shows that of course I would
Speaker 5: never like.
Speaker 4: But if you guys have time for a mini story.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 5: The way I got into it because I looked at
Speaker 5: it the same way. I was like, this is going
Speaker 5: to be terrible, and I just wrote it off as
Speaker 5: like just a cheesy show. So I was, you know,
Speaker 5: in twenty seventeen or something. Nicki and I had broken
Speaker 5: up at that point and I was in the I
Speaker 5: was in Dubai working for.
Speaker 4: A little while.
Speaker 3: What were you not in Nabu Dhabi for a Nabu
Speaker 3: jab I.
Speaker 5: Was in n Abu Dhab actually, so it's an Abu
Speaker 5: Dhabi for what I'm on bumble for what for Abu Jabi?
Speaker 4: Okay, complete the sentence.
Speaker 5: I'm on bumble. I meet this girl. We hit it
Speaker 5: off a little bit over text.
Speaker 3: Yeah, whoa what just what made you swipe right on her?
Speaker 3: Was it just her smile? Yes?
Speaker 5: She seemed like she had a good personality fun I'm
Speaker 5: a personality guy, as you guys can tell. Everybody knows
Speaker 5: I'm a personality guy. So we so we start talking
Speaker 5: and I don't know, we get to something where I
Speaker 5: was like, I was dead. I was like really into
Speaker 5: Game of Thrones at the time. Brian and I used
Speaker 5: to have Game of Thrones watch parties. Nicky Nicky was
Speaker 5: there and would like tolerate it and and bespected perspect
Speaker 5: you did respect it, which so I was just so
Speaker 5: into Game of Thrones, was before Game of Thrones stunk.
Speaker 5: And she's she's mentioned something about suits because I guess
Speaker 5: we talked about what TV shows. If we're if I'm
Speaker 5: if I'm matching with you on bumble I'm getting to
Speaker 5: TV shows at like the fourth text, probably just because
Speaker 5: I've got nothing else.
Speaker 4: It's all I do.
Speaker 5: Anyway, I say there's some sort of bet where she
Speaker 5: says I will like Suits more than she would like
Speaker 5: whatever show I come up with. So I was like,
Speaker 5: you will like Game of Thrones more than I will
Speaker 5: like Suits. And I was like, okay, bets on, and
Speaker 5: I take bets pretty seriously.
Speaker 3: Yes, he does.
Speaker 4: I get into it.
Speaker 5: And so I started watching Suits immediately, and like a
Speaker 5: week later, I finished the first season of Suits, and
Speaker 5: she followed up with her follow up whether she never
Speaker 5: even watched one single episode of Game of Thrones, and
Speaker 5: so I but by the end of the season, I
Speaker 5: was like, you win already. You will not like Game
Speaker 5: of Thrones as much as I like because you liked it.
Speaker 5: I definitely was like, I can watch this entire thing.
Speaker 6: Are there like focusing on the episodes because it isn't
Speaker 6: it like a procedural in the background type show. I
Speaker 6: mean they're like an hour episode, right, Yeah? Yeah, I
Speaker 6: would say that.
Speaker 5: You know, I was an Abu Dhabi for an Abu Jabi,
Speaker 5: and you know, like you had a lot of time
Speaker 5: on your hands to watch did you.
Speaker 3: Say it was your abu hobby. It was not a
Speaker 3: hobby to watch suits? You didn't have much else to it? Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 3: no I liked it.
Speaker 5: My point is, don't overlook suits just because you're like
Speaker 5: too cool like I.
Speaker 3: You know, no, I want to start it too. Don't
Speaker 3: overlook suits. Hey, what about this? Because you don't like
Speaker 3: Meghan Markle? And you know what, maybe you don't like
Speaker 3: Meghan Markle because why, Chris.
Speaker 5: There's a smear campaign by the deep state, the British
Speaker 5: Royal family.
Speaker 3: Yes, if you investigate why you don't like Meghan Markle,
Speaker 3: you come up dry. Bitches.
Speaker 4: You come up dry because you.
Speaker 3: Don't really know. It just seeped into your pores. You
Speaker 3: don't even know why. Oh, because she's stuck up. Why
Speaker 3: do you think that I'm pissed about it? I don't
Speaker 3: like it. I'm so tired of people. You know. I
Speaker 3: was listening to your podcast the other day and there
Speaker 3: was a guy on who like, should not have any
Speaker 3: opinion about the Royal family. He's an older man that
Speaker 3: was in radio uh back with Courtney. His name's Guy Phillips.
Speaker 3: He's a great radio guy. But he even said, I'm
Speaker 3: watching suits and I love it even though I'm not.
Speaker 3: I don't care for Megan Markle very much. And I'm like,
Speaker 3: why does this sixty something year old man have an
Speaker 3: opinion a negative opinion about Megan Markle.
Speaker 4: It's because the Royal family.
Speaker 3: One they've seeped and she is a nice girl. She
Speaker 3: just fell in love with this guy. She didn't try
Speaker 3: to root And why does any American give a fuck
Speaker 3: about the Royal goddamn family. He's shut up about it.
Speaker 3: Why do you care? So I understand Brits like having
Speaker 3: this work. I don't understand this because it's it's it's
Speaker 3: almost like growing up in a church, like of scientology,
Speaker 3: Like it's just they're brainwashed into Karen.
Speaker 4: It is weird.
Speaker 3: I can't help it.
Speaker 5: The idea that there is a queen of another country
Speaker 5: on your money, like for Canadians and Australians.
Speaker 4: Australians.
Speaker 5: Australians are like, you know, they're very laid back people
Speaker 5: and they're not worried about it. But from from our
Speaker 5: perspective to be like, you've got the Queen of England
Speaker 5: on your money, yes, this is bizarre.
Speaker 3: And then I love Doug stan Hope's point about like well,
Speaker 3: the British people always say, yeah, it's the royal family,
Speaker 3: but they don't really have a say in politics or anything.
Speaker 3: It's like, well, then why do you fuck them? Their
Speaker 3: defense is always like but they don't really do anything.
Speaker 3: It's like, well, then what is going on here?
Speaker 4: People should google Doug stan Hopes stand Oh.
Speaker 3: I played it on the podcast before Ages Ago, and
Speaker 3: we have a lot of new fans since then. So
Speaker 3: if you haven't heard it, go listen to Doug stand
Speaker 3: Hopes rant against the Royal Family. It really like solidifies
Speaker 3: how I feel.
Speaker 5: But to close the loop on suits close listen. I'm
Speaker 5: not saying everybody's gonna love it. I'm saying give it
Speaker 5: a shot because you might casually like it and be
Speaker 5: surprised by it. There's good like there's like if you
Speaker 5: like watching shows where there's like a good looking people
Speaker 5: that you can like kind of have a crush on,
Speaker 5: there's there's somebody for everybody.
Speaker 3: Oh that's cute. I like that. Yeah, who are you
Speaker 3: crushing on?
Speaker 4: Markle? You are a Mark Mark?
Speaker 3: When I the Royal Family got me, I used to
Speaker 3: be a Mark, like a skeptic Marko's charming on the show,
Speaker 3: and I used to be like, Oh, do you like
Speaker 3: mak him because he likes suits before anyone else, And
Speaker 3: I go, oh, is she like so hot? Like you're
Speaker 3: probably so into her. I was like kind of jealous,
Speaker 3: And now I'm obsessed with her and I think she's
Speaker 3: the coolest and the smartest, and I really am just
Speaker 3: such an advocate of spreading the word about how great
Speaker 3: she is. She was recently seen at the Beyonce concert
Speaker 3: and people were just like, oh you at Beyonce. It's
Speaker 3: like she can't do anything and people.
Speaker 4: Are gonna be mad.
Speaker 3: Although I will say I saw a clip of Timothy
Speaker 3: Schalomey spoiler alert with Kylie Jenner. They made their first
Speaker 3: public appearance together at the Beyonce concert, either yesterday or
Speaker 3: the day before, and he was smoking a cigarette in
Speaker 3: the Sofi Center and ashing over the ledge, which I
Speaker 3: found to be insane. But they're they're out and they're together,
Speaker 3: and that's weird.
Speaker 4: It seems so bizarre. Yeah, it makes it like I
Speaker 4: remember when.
Speaker 6: Kylie Jenner is part of the other royal family. Yeah,
Speaker 6: that people care about.
Speaker 3: But people, well, that's the weirdest one too, because people
Speaker 3: seem to like always hate the Kardashians. But then why
Speaker 3: are they so popular? You know, like everyone seems to
Speaker 3: just not like them, but we can't stop consuming them.
Speaker 4: Right at the end.
Speaker 5: I mean it's like Brian said, it's they're like the
Speaker 5: They're like an American royal family. Yeah, that's true, But
Speaker 5: I like shallow may I'm a shallow may Man.
Speaker 2: Together, I was enchanted by, like, how people so famous?
Speaker 2: Yeah you think it was Instagram?
Speaker 3: Yep. I think it's always dms for celebs, or it's
Speaker 3: like you know, or they're friends of a friend, gives
Speaker 3: a text or something, or.
Speaker 4: They're like backstage at fashion week.
Speaker 3: That's it. That's one hundred percent backstage at fashion week.
Speaker 3: It's always stage at fashion week. Oh my god, that's
Speaker 3: so true. It's so cute to me to picture Chris
Speaker 3: on the apps. Do you ever think about your boyfriend
Speaker 3: like being out there, like trying to meet people, like
Speaker 3: just like being like, I think it's adorable. Just you
Speaker 3: were like swiping and like had to make first moves,
Speaker 3: like and like just do cute things and like have
Speaker 3: a one liner like to get in, and then you
Speaker 3: were talking about suits and making bets. I think it's
Speaker 3: so adorable. Where's that spark. Go.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I think it's when you call me adorable and cute.
Speaker 3: It's so cute.
Speaker 4: No, you don't like me call cute. It's I didn't
Speaker 4: think it's patronizing.
Speaker 3: Yes, really, yeah, oh I think it's it's I think it.
Speaker 3: I don't mean it that way like makes it. It's
Speaker 3: endearing to me. Like how when you were just a
Speaker 3: single guy. I like that guy.
Speaker 6: I understand it because you're like rooting for the person
Speaker 6: and they're like in a vulnerable position trying to find someone,
Speaker 6: and you really want them to succeed, and you're like
Speaker 6: I can help you, but I'm not there to help you.
Speaker 4: You guys, I think are looking at it from a
Speaker 4: different perspective.
Speaker 3: He's just a hardy guy and a.
Speaker 4: Girlfriend. He was not like Brian.
Speaker 5: What you guys are saying like, it's more just like oh,
Speaker 5: I'm bored and don't know anybody in Abu Dabi, like
Speaker 5: let's see what's going on.
Speaker 3: You know why I like it, Chris, it's because for me,
Speaker 3: when I first met you, I would have never thought
Speaker 3: when we broke up the first time, I would have
Speaker 3: never thought.
Speaker 4: You would get on the apps.
Speaker 3: Because you're a guy who like doesn't do what everyone
Speaker 3: seems to do. And so when I found out you
Speaker 3: were on the apps, I was just like, wait, you
Speaker 3: made a profile and had to like scroll to find
Speaker 3: your age.
Speaker 4: You had to like answer these like hinch youah.
Speaker 5: My profile was blank forever. I think my profile just
Speaker 5: said like, you know something, just like one thing that.
Speaker 3: I like, like pizza.
Speaker 5: Oh, I think it's as soft rock. I just had
Speaker 5: no profile anything.
Speaker 3: Yeah, because I was just like this, because you got
Speaker 3: a face that.
Speaker 5: Can carry thing that is about. This is humiliating, it
Speaker 5: really is. And I think I think I wrote maybe
Speaker 5: for a while, something like not as tall as I look, right, something,
Speaker 5: something to take it down a notch.
Speaker 3: Yeah, literally, yeah, a few notches. So Chris is visiting
Speaker 3: in today's birthday. We have a special thing planned on Thursday.
Speaker 4: I like how you say we like it's like.
Speaker 3: We're both doing it. We're both going does Chris know
Speaker 3: what it is? No, No, it's gonna be a surprise.
Speaker 3: But before that, we're going to look at dogs.
Speaker 4: We it's your birthday present.
Speaker 3: I know. I was like, for your birthday, we're gonna
Speaker 3: go do something. We're gonna go look at dogs and shelter.
Speaker 3: She just texted me about it. Actually, the girl that's
Speaker 3: helping us look for dogs because last Natalie for Mayday Rescue,
Speaker 3: Natalie for oh yeah, she's been on the podcast before.
Speaker 3: Natalie from Mayday Rescue is going to go meet us
Speaker 3: and we're gonna make maybe make a video at the
Speaker 3: shelter with some dogs and give them.
Speaker 4: They'll be like, oh, I'm going home.
Speaker 3: We're like, no, we're making a video with you, bitch,
Speaker 3: get over here and go back in your cage. Just
Speaker 3: using you for content.
Speaker 5: If people like like, that's like half the reason I
Speaker 5: got on social media was to like look at the
Speaker 5: Dodo and things like that. So people like, you know,
Speaker 5: dog rescue people should follow may Day Rescue.
Speaker 3: Yeah, she does a really good job of place animals.
Speaker 3: And it's just so nice when you see a little
Speaker 3: scruffy dog that is covered in like a bath mat
Speaker 3: of fur, and then they look like a different dog
Speaker 3: once they get a makeover, and then they end up
Speaker 3: happy on a couch licking someone's face. Scosted.
Speaker 6: Yes.
Speaker 3: So the other day, though I got really close on
Speaker 3: a dog, I didn't even tell the girls chat because
Speaker 3: I'm tired of like, the last time I got close
Speaker 3: on the dog, I like announced on the girl's chat
Speaker 3: and then I had to like tell everyone that I
Speaker 3: didn't get it, and it was just so sad. It's
Speaker 3: I don't mean to relate it to people telling people
Speaker 3: they're pregnant and then losing a pregnancy, but it just
Speaker 3: it's it's felt.
Speaker 4: The closest I've ever gotten to that.
Speaker 3: What was that.
Speaker 2: That's exactly what I thought of. I was like, Oh,
Speaker 2: she's just it's like having a miscarriage. It felt like
Speaker 2: that's the closest version.
Speaker 4: It is so funny. So I don't mean, please know that.
Speaker 3: I don't. I don't think it's the same at all.
Speaker 3: But it's like the closest I've been able to feel
Speaker 3: to that where I like start like looking at dog
Speaker 3: toys and stuff and like imagining the future of my
Speaker 3: life with this animal by my side. And I'll say
Speaker 3: that like I can see the animal. It's not like
Speaker 3: I like it's there. I met it, I hugged it,
Speaker 3: I carried it. I like it licked my face. I
Speaker 3: thought I had it. So last week on Tuesday, a
Speaker 3: woman died and the next day her or that night,
Speaker 3: her friend posted on Instagram, I need to find a
Speaker 3: place where my best friend died last night. It's so tragic,
Speaker 3: like it was. She had a heart condition and she
Speaker 3: went in to go have a thing put in and
Speaker 3: it didn't work out, and she she died tragically. And
Speaker 3: she had a five year old dog. I'm looking, I know,
Speaker 3: it's so sad, but she but the doc I will
Speaker 3: say that the there was she went into the thing knowing,
Speaker 3: like I think it was like a twenty five percent
Speaker 3: chance that it was maybe gonna end this way, so
Speaker 3: it wasn't completely like, which is still tragic. I mean,
Speaker 3: you would think you have a seventy five percent chance
Speaker 3: of it. It was awful. It's awful, but people die.
Speaker 3: It's part of the story. I'm not trying to make
Speaker 3: it about that, or I'm not also trying to not
Speaker 3: make it about that because someone died in the story.
Speaker 3: But her dog was then you know, didn't have an owner,
Speaker 3: so they Her best friend put this picture of this
Speaker 3: dog online and then it got posted by someone else,
Speaker 3: and then Anya saw it and she sent it to
Speaker 3: me and she was like, this dog seems to like
Speaker 3: meet all of your needs. It's this many pounds, it's
Speaker 3: this it's five years old, it's cute. And it does.
Speaker 3: It seems to not have a barking problem or this
Speaker 3: like some perfect dog. So I went and I messaged
Speaker 3: the woman immediately. I asked Chris first, and I was like,
Speaker 3: this dog seems kind of perfect. Do you think we
Speaker 3: could maybe do this? And then you said, you know,
Speaker 3: go for it, and I was like thanks. And then
Speaker 3: I wrote to the woman and I said, listen, I
Speaker 3: travel a lot. I want a dog that I can
Speaker 3: travel with. So I just want to be upfront, like,
Speaker 3: this dog is going to travel, because some people might
Speaker 3: not want that for their dog. Just say that if
Speaker 3: you don't want your dog to travel, this is the
Speaker 3: because then she wrote back and said, we don't want
Speaker 3: this dog to travel and sorry, we're gonna meet other people,
Speaker 3: but thank you so much for your interest, very polite
Speaker 3: about it. And I was really like, oh, sad about it.
Speaker 3: And then I was like, wait, I feel like I
Speaker 3: don't know, I feel like I can convince this woman
Speaker 3: because I'm not I'm not gonna do something to a
Speaker 3: dog that's gonna make this dog's life worse than someone else.
Speaker 3: I'm giving this I would give the dog the best
Speaker 3: life possible because just because it travels with me, I
Speaker 3: do a thing.
Speaker 4: You're putting the dog under the plane. Yes, I think
Speaker 4: sometimes that's yeah, you're so right.
Speaker 3: So I made that very I said, I'm just gonna shoot,
Speaker 3: want my shot one more time.
Speaker 4: I'm sorry to bother you.
Speaker 3: I know you're grieving and like, I don't want you
Speaker 3: to have to read a bunch of text, but I'm
Speaker 3: just saying, if you the fact that it would travel
Speaker 3: with me means it would travel under the seat in
Speaker 3: a carrier. It would be I would be checking on
Speaker 3: it constantly. It would be safe. I've traveled with dogs before.
Speaker 3: I would never do anything to an animal that would
Speaker 3: cause it anxiety if it does. If it would have
Speaker 3: anxiety and wasn't go traveling, it would stay with my boyfriend,
Speaker 3: or it'd stay with my family who has dogs. It
Speaker 3: would always have people to take care of it. And
Speaker 3: I said, here's the other thing. It sounds like it's
Speaker 3: a bad deal with this dog traveling all the time,
Speaker 3: But what that means is I don't have an office job.
Speaker 3: I'm not leaving my dog alone in a cage seven
Speaker 3: hours a day, which I guarantee you whoever this dog
Speaker 3: ends up with, it's gonna spend a lot more time
Speaker 3: alone than what if it was with me, And maybe
Speaker 3: that's what they want for the dog is like it's
Speaker 3: okay being alone, because it turns out this dog, I
Speaker 3: guess is okay being alone. But I was like, this
Speaker 3: dog will never be alone. I'll always be with it.
Speaker 3: It will it's tiny, it will always be with me.
Speaker 3: And if it's not alone, I don't leave. I don't
Speaker 3: allow my dogs to be alone for more than three hours.
Speaker 3: I would never. That's like the most before I had
Speaker 3: someone come and walk them or something. And if you
Speaker 3: leave your dog alone for more than that time, I
Speaker 3: don't think you're a bad person. You do what you can.
Speaker 3: But I don't believe dogs should be left in cages
Speaker 3: at home alone for more than like I think the
Speaker 3: I would say, Pete says, like more than five minutes.
Speaker 5: But some people leave it at home, not in a
Speaker 5: cage for a law periods of time.
Speaker 3: Yes, but sometimes they like the cage, like and they
Speaker 3: need the cage like the dog likes the cage. Yeah.
Speaker 3: So I don't mean to say I'm adding cage to
Speaker 3: sound worse, but sometimes I mean that's like a better
Speaker 3: scenario than just like on your couch. But some I've
Speaker 3: heard people leaving seven or eight hours and the dog
Speaker 3: just has to like hold it. And I think it
Speaker 3: gets worse than that. When people have you, you just
Speaker 3: are a little bit more negligent. I think it can
Speaker 3: be worse. So I was just saying, like, this dog
Speaker 3: will always be with someone. So she then reconsidered and said, yeah,
Speaker 3: come meet it. Actually this is you know. I plued
Speaker 3: my case and I said, I'm I'm a vegan because
Speaker 3: of animal rights, Like I'm not going to ever make
Speaker 3: this a dog feel unsafe or have anxiety, Like I
Speaker 3: will do everything to make it comfortable one hundred percent
Speaker 3: of the time. And she she bought it. Man, she
Speaker 3: bought it now. So she let me go meet it
Speaker 3: and I held it and it was so cute and
Speaker 3: so nice, and I loved it so much and it
Speaker 3: was so calm and sweet, and I you know it,
Speaker 3: I just I loved it immediately, and I was like,
Speaker 3: this dog is like this is happening. Because the girl,
Speaker 3: the woman was really cool and she's a writer. We
Speaker 3: connected and I just felt like we had a good talk.
Speaker 3: She also we were talking about having kids and how
Speaker 3: I'm like, I don't plan on having kids, and she
Speaker 3: was like, she gave me some advice on that, which
Speaker 3: was really awesome, but I don't want to say what
Speaker 3: it was in case she hears this and she's like,
Speaker 3: you betrayed my trust by I'm not revealing who this
Speaker 3: woman is. But she was awesome and we connected. We
Speaker 3: walked the dog and I felt like, Oh, this is
Speaker 3: gonna happen. And then I was on the treadmill like
Speaker 3: an hour later, and like in the middle of a workout,
Speaker 3: I just get a call and I'm like, oh, and
Speaker 3: then I get them. I let it go because I
Speaker 3: was like panting at the time like a dog. And
Speaker 3: then she was like, she was like, I'm nearly crying
Speaker 3: because I have to tell you. We are just we
Speaker 3: want the dog to be local, because I guess the
Speaker 3: woman's family wants to maybe like see the dog and
Speaker 3: they don't want to be all the way in Saint Louis.
Speaker 3: So I didn't get the dog, and I was so
Speaker 3: sad for like a day because it was only like
Speaker 3: a day that I thought it was less than a
Speaker 3: day that I thought I was going to get it,
Speaker 3: So it wasn't like super seeped into my consciousness.
Speaker 5: But I was like, but I had like the fact
Speaker 5: that you were going to see it, like I had
Speaker 5: already started like being like, okay, our life with Hobbs, Yes,
Speaker 5: And I was excited about.
Speaker 4: It, I know, and we had to talk about what
Speaker 4: we had a time.
Speaker 5: I almost messaged that lady to be like, hey, you're
Speaker 5: doing the right thing by seeing NICKI, like, because you
Speaker 5: know Luigi. The first day that Nikki had Luigi, you know,
Speaker 5: everybody said it was a mistake.
Speaker 4: Luigi was like.
Speaker 5: Scared and barking, and then and then and then bit
Speaker 5: Nicki and and like we were like what is going on?
Speaker 3: And she was like you were just you would have
Speaker 3: been like this dog, there's nothing. It's going to be
Speaker 3: troubled the whole time in a corner, shivering all day long.
Speaker 4: And you're like, this is a disaster.
Speaker 5: And Nikki loved it into being submission, into submission.
Speaker 4: Luigi's like the great It's just the greatest dog.
Speaker 5: And then Nikki did it again with Mary, and so
Speaker 5: I wanted to tell this lady like, hey, Nicky's gonna
Speaker 5: love this thing, like in a way that's extraordinary and
Speaker 5: it's gonna have an amazing life. But I also understand, like,
Speaker 5: you know, if that if that woman who died has
Speaker 5: siblings and that dog makes them feel close to their sister,
Speaker 5: then it's like, okay, I as hard as it is, Yeah,
Speaker 5: that he's not he doesn't get to be ours. It's like, Okay,
Speaker 5: this guy's this. This dog might give these people comfort
Speaker 5: over the next few years, but it's still hard.
Speaker 3: I put my woman, I put myself in that woman's
Speaker 3: shoes or like the brother's shoes of the woman who died.
Speaker 4: That you're gonna say I put my woman pants on.
Speaker 3: I did put my woman pants on that day.
Speaker 4: I hate I hate it when people say.
Speaker 3: I was embarrassed because when I met when I met
Speaker 3: the dog, I was We were like, it was very
Speaker 3: hot outside. We were on the sidewalk and we sat
Speaker 3: down on this like you know, gray pavement to like
Speaker 3: play with the dog. And when we got up, I
Speaker 3: had sweat so much so that there was like wet
Speaker 3: stains all over the ground and it looked like I
Speaker 3: had like pissed everywhere, but it was just me sweating,
Speaker 3: and the woman had left no stains, so it looked
Speaker 3: like I could just like so I might have not
Speaker 3: gotten the dog because I had a puppy pad problem
Speaker 3: and but I did, Like I think, you know, if
Speaker 3: my sister died and all I had was her dog
Speaker 3: and I had I couldn't take it, but I wanted
Speaker 3: it to find a home. I'd want the dog in
Speaker 3: Saint Louis. I wouldn't want it to go to California. Yes,
Speaker 3: like I just even if I wasn't gonna see the dog,
Speaker 3: because I don't think the guy is going to visit
Speaker 3: the dog, I would just want it in the vicinity.
Speaker 3: It's like you just gotta and so, and I always
Speaker 3: believe everything happens for a reason, and like there is
Speaker 3: now there's a dog out there that I wouldn't have
Speaker 3: that I'm gonna get. And when I get it, I'm
Speaker 3: going to be like, I can't believe I almost didn't
Speaker 3: have you. And I know that dog is out there
Speaker 3: right now, shivering in a cage somewhere.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, there is.
Speaker 3: That's what.
Speaker 2: Also, you and Chris had a conversation about having a
Speaker 2: dog because you guys are living together now.
Speaker 3: Yes, we had a conversation for that.
Speaker 5: That's exactly right, Like we're we wouldn't have had the
Speaker 5: conversation if it wasn't for this dog.
Speaker 4: And now we're ready for whatever that next.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we had a really good talk about like what
Speaker 3: the expectations were with the dog. Like all I wanted
Speaker 3: Chris to say was like, I just with Luigi Marian
Speaker 3: it was always Nicky's dogs, even though he was like
Speaker 3: very present in their lives, and it always kind of
Speaker 3: like I just was like, man, I want it to
Speaker 3: be our dog, you know, like I just want him
Speaker 3: to say my dog, and like then I have this
Speaker 3: thing with the person I love, like that gives me
Speaker 3: kind of the thing maybe that a maternal instinct where
Speaker 3: you're like making something with someone and so for this,
Speaker 3: I was like, you'll be just as accountable as you
Speaker 3: were with Luigian Marian, which was like very helpful, but
Speaker 3: not the not the number one Like I'm always I
Speaker 3: will do the most of the work because I that's
Speaker 3: what I want to do. I really do, Like I
Speaker 3: want if I'm getting this dog, like I know that
Speaker 3: I'm taking responsibility for it, but will you just say
Speaker 3: our when you.
Speaker 4: Say it on the radio.
Speaker 3: And he was like yeah, I can do that, and
Speaker 3: aw And Chris is also the as I've said on
Speaker 3: the podcast a million times, the best part about him
Speaker 3: is like if I ever need anything. This guy does
Speaker 3: it literally anything. Uh, he will make sure it happens
Speaker 3: with no questions asked. No, like you forgot that, I
Speaker 3: gotta mail it?
Speaker 4: Like no, I always thought the best part about me
Speaker 4: was my jawline.
Speaker 3: I mean, you're forty two now, baby, I know it's
Speaker 3: not looking.
Speaker 4: No, your jawlines has never been better.
Speaker 3: Actually, I took a picture of you last night that
Speaker 3: really made me laugh where he looked like he was
Speaker 3: just making a bad face and I was like, happy birthday, baby.
Speaker 4: I love his smile.
Speaker 3: It was so funny. But no, I I grew up
Speaker 3: in a house no offense, dad, if you're listening, But
Speaker 3: like and my mom too, where every like if something
Speaker 3: if like my mom forgot something at home and they
Speaker 3: were trying, it'd be like, Julie, why did you forget that?
Speaker 3: Or like e j, you should have remembered the fucking
Speaker 3: garage door. And it's like, ah, I did not repeat that.
Speaker 3: In my relationship, I have a relationship with someone who
Speaker 3: doesn't go like why did you do this? Like it's
Speaker 3: always just like okay, we can go back. Oh that's
Speaker 3: it's like it's like a compassionate, like that sucks, but
Speaker 3: like we'll take care of it. It's not like a
Speaker 3: punishing What were you gonna say, Well.
Speaker 5: No, I thought I thought you were gonna say that.
Speaker 5: I was really responsible. And when I was here last time, Brian,
Speaker 5: do you know this. I ran out of gas in
Speaker 5: Nicky's car. Heard it's not his fault though I've never
Speaker 5: run out of gas before. The car was faulty. I've
Speaker 5: never been in a car that ran out of the
Speaker 5: car is faulty.
Speaker 3: You saw it.
Speaker 4: No, it is.
Speaker 5: It's not as like obvious as when other cars run
Speaker 5: out of gas.
Speaker 3: It tells you what's set when you have seventy miles
Speaker 3: left and then it abandoned the there was no other
Speaker 3: warning until you're out of gas.
Speaker 4: That's a faulty Mercedes. And Nicky was up. So we
Speaker 4: started the car and I was like, I gotta throw
Speaker 4: some stuff away. You're going to see Barbie.
Speaker 5: So I drove, like, you know, like twenty feet away
Speaker 5: in the parking lot where there was a trash can,
Speaker 5: and I went and put I put something in the
Speaker 5: trash can, and I came back in the car with.
Speaker 3: The car starts like shuddering, like it's about to start sobbing.
Speaker 3: It's like.
Speaker 4: And I'm like, what's happening? The car's going like and
Speaker 4: then all of a sudden, damn, and I was just
Speaker 4: in disiplaine, and.
Speaker 3: I go, did someone go to the Reagan Museum a
Speaker 3: little time?
Speaker 1: I went to the seventy miles? It's not enough.
Speaker 6: No, It's like telling your kids when they're six that
Speaker 6: they're going to hit puberty one day, and then when
Speaker 6: they turn thirteen, you're just like, what are you talking about?
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's like, what's happening here?
Speaker 3: And so today Chris was like, when you have to
Speaker 3: work today, like, uh, maybe I can just I can
Speaker 3: go do my own thing. And I go, uh huh,
Speaker 3: just s up, keep an eye on that gas gauge.
Speaker 3: Happy birthday, all right. We're gonna take a break and
Speaker 3: come back after this. And we're back. So does anyone
Speaker 3: know anyone who's at Burning Man right now?
Speaker 1: I mean I don't, but yeah we do.
Speaker 4: We do know people. You just don't know that they're.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you just don't know that they're there. There's seventy thousand.
Speaker 4: This guy Glenn has got to be there. Mike is there.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but I feel like, yeah, definitely, A dude named
Speaker 3: A couple guys named Glenn, are there for sure?
Speaker 4: You're right.
Speaker 6: You know.
Speaker 3: It's surprising though that you don't know anyone, like off
Speaker 3: the top of your head who's at Burning Man, because
Speaker 3: it seems to be the kind of thing that people
Speaker 3: talk about all the time.
Speaker 5: If they're going, oh, yeah, it's like it's a CrossFit
Speaker 5: or yeah, birthdays.
Speaker 1: So you know what happened at burning Man, right, rain?
Speaker 6: Yeah, so everyone got rained for days and then it
Speaker 6: got all muddy and then people one person died and
Speaker 6: people weren't allowed to leave Burning Man.
Speaker 4: It's that it could be like drug related.
Speaker 1: Or sure somebody died, but they.
Speaker 3: Someone think at least one person a year died. Yes,
Speaker 3: it does.
Speaker 6: Seventy thousands people doing drugs in the desert. I mean,
Speaker 6: it seems like there would at least five deaths a year.
Speaker 5: But it's like, what it's like the Kalis's wedding.
Speaker 4: What do they say. It's like, if I.
Speaker 6: At least yes, if at least two people don't die,
Speaker 6: it's a dull affair and a doth Raki wedding.
Speaker 1: That's a Game of Thrones lore.
Speaker 6: Spoiler alert. Several people die at the doth Raky wedding,
Speaker 6: and is.
Speaker 3: That the Red Wedding. I saw the Red Wedding.
Speaker 5: That's not that's a real spoiler, but that's Ago cal Drogo.
Speaker 4: Was she topless for it? No, she was topless that night. Cool.
Speaker 3: Nice, nice.
Speaker 6: So it rained a lot at burning Man and it
Speaker 6: got really muddy and it got so muddy that they
Speaker 6: had to shelter in place and they weren't allowed to
Speaker 6: drive home. So some people including Chris Rock and Diplo,
Speaker 6: had to walk six miles in the mud to leave
Speaker 6: burning Man. Which I know it's in the mud, so
Speaker 6: that makes it more difficult, but walking in a six mile.
Speaker 1: Hike is not that long, not at all.
Speaker 6: But still people were then posting to social media like
Speaker 6: it was more like a flex and like a and
Speaker 6: it's also like.
Speaker 3: A straight line. It's not like they're going through mountains, right.
Speaker 6: Yeah, but with the mud, I can understand it being
Speaker 6: a little difficult. They probably didn't have like proper gear
Speaker 6: to like hike, but like six miles you could do,
Speaker 6: you know, in like a half a day.
Speaker 1: And people were like posting.
Speaker 6: On Instagram and the other social media that like this.
Speaker 6: They were like refugees from Syria, you know, they did
Speaker 6: they just got out.
Speaker 1: And also how.
Speaker 6: Amazing transformative experience it was, and like they were expecting
Speaker 6: to get some sort of what's the word, uh, people
Speaker 6: people caring about this people, what's the word trying.
Speaker 1: To think of?
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, female sympathy.
Speaker 6: They're trying to get some sympathy for this and and
Speaker 6: try to seem cool. But instead everyone's just like fuck you,
Speaker 6: fuck you, fucking losers.
Speaker 5: They are gonna be insufferable every all seventy thousand people
Speaker 5: that were at this thing. It's it is gonna be
Speaker 5: like we're gonna hear stories about it for the rest
Speaker 5: of our lives. We're never gonna get to We're never
Speaker 5: gonna hear the end of like.
Speaker 6: Oh I was at the burning Man well, and imagine
Speaker 6: next year is burning Man when you have new when
Speaker 6: you have people at burning Man next year and they're like, yeah,
Speaker 6: but I was at the one last year. It was
Speaker 6: when we were in the Mud, and when I'm a
Speaker 6: better person than you because I was in the Mud one,
Speaker 6: it's just gonna be I.
Speaker 2: Don't know if this is true or not because I
Speaker 2: read it on Reddit, but apparently there is a private
Speaker 2: plane at burning Man that people take just so they
Speaker 2: could join the Mile High Club. It's like one of
Speaker 2: the attractions there. Sure, that's like, come back down. Yeah,
Speaker 2: it's just a theme park.
Speaker 6: It's become like maybe in the eighties when they started
Speaker 6: Burning Man, it was like just a bunch of hippies
Speaker 6: trying to figure their shit out. But now it is
Speaker 6: just a theme park for the rich where people not
Speaker 6: everyone's not.
Speaker 3: It does sound transformative and fun. I've been sold on
Speaker 3: it slightly by people, and I was the biggest like,
Speaker 3: oh god, Burning Man. I don't want to go because
Speaker 3: it's camping and it's muddy and it's like communal, and
Speaker 3: I don't want to have to like talk and hug
Speaker 3: a bunch of people and people be like what's up, man,
Speaker 3: and like share my food? Like everything's there's no money,
Speaker 3: it's all bartering. Yeah, yeah, there's no money. Everything's bicycles.
Speaker 3: And that was like, sold to me, is like a
Speaker 3: good thing. I'm like, no, I.
Speaker 5: Don't know who's selling it to you, because it does
Speaker 5: not seem like a thing that you would have a
Speaker 5: good time at.
Speaker 3: Enna I can't. I'm just saying like I don't. I
Speaker 3: have some people in my life who I think are
Speaker 3: cool people that like it, so I don't think it's
Speaker 3: that lame because I just trust these people to be
Speaker 3: not as lame as the type of Burning Man person.
Speaker 3: But I will say I do know someone who's there
Speaker 3: who I really don't like. And at first I was like, hah,
Speaker 3: this bitch is stuck in the fun. And then I go, oh, Fox,
Speaker 3: she's gonna have this stuff. She's going to be worse
Speaker 3: than anyone. So it's like it's almost like it's it's
Speaker 3: a better for them than if they just had a
Speaker 3: great burning Are you kidding me?
Speaker 5: The people that go to Burning Man just want to
Speaker 5: talk about Burning Man, and this gives them this license.
Speaker 6: It becomes their life, like as their personality now is
Speaker 6: that every year they go to burning Now.
Speaker 5: That being said, I'm very interested in going. I think
Speaker 5: I would do better at it than you would. I'll
Speaker 5: go with you.
Speaker 3: That's only cute, Yeah, sorry in a good way. That's sexy. Yeah,
Speaker 3: you'll like you anymore. You'd never have I just found out.
Speaker 3: But yeah, I'll go with you. I would, I'll go.
Speaker 3: I feel protected by you, right because you protect me
Speaker 3: from things that I don't care for In situations like that,
Speaker 3: You'll make it as comfortable as possible. You feel like
Speaker 3: I got your charger hooked up here, and I'll do
Speaker 3: this ystent a cord. I got this frisbee that lights up.
Speaker 3: We'll do that, Like he'll bring side a lot.
Speaker 4: I like a lot of light up Frisbees.
Speaker 3: And you went to ari I the other day and
Speaker 3: he got it. There was a sale. He got me
Speaker 3: a blanket.
Speaker 4: I love a sale at ur It just.
Speaker 3: Gets me little gifts and like it's I didn't know
Speaker 3: it was my love language till I till I knew.
Speaker 3: So he got me a beautiful little blanket that is
Speaker 3: just like a thing you can ball up into like
Speaker 3: a really nice pillow or use a blanket. And he
Speaker 3: got me a light up frisbee. That is fucking cool.
Speaker 3: It's for us, got us a light up frisbee.
Speaker 4: Well yeah, and for like you know when you're here,
Speaker 4: like if you want to go.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 4: But also this thing that I think might be.
Speaker 5: Good for a lot of different people to travel a lot.
Speaker 5: It's only ten bucks. It is a uh it's like
Speaker 5: a scale that you hold in your hand that you
Speaker 5: can weigh your luggage before you get to the airport,
Speaker 5: so you don't have that like panic for two hours
Speaker 5: before you get to the airport to be like, am
Speaker 5: I at fifty three pounds?
Speaker 4: Are they gonna bust me on this? Am I gonna
Speaker 4: look like an idiot?
Speaker 3: Unpacked my bag vibrator out? Yeah?
Speaker 4: So it's like.
Speaker 3: Rator. I mean, the magic wand is industrial. I guess
Speaker 3: it's probably one point five pounds at least. But yesterday
Speaker 3: I was like weigh my leg So I was like
Speaker 3: laying in bed and Chris was just like hooked it
Speaker 3: to my leg and I was just like just lift up.
Speaker 3: So we were weighing my legs. They both weigh the same. Yeah,
Speaker 3: twelve point five. Just about would you you guys would
Speaker 3: go to Burning Man?
Speaker 1: Right?
Speaker 5: I mean I know that we all make fun of it,
Speaker 5: and we should. It deserves to be made fun of,
Speaker 5: but it still looks cool and fun. Does av want
Speaker 5: to go?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 2: No, really, but he likes our cultures and he likes rescue.
Speaker 2: But it's not like it's not an outdoor outdoors thing.
Speaker 2: It's it's more about like being artsy and like eclectic
Speaker 2: and on drugs and the whole bartering thing.
Speaker 6: Like I would want to go to Burning Man just
Speaker 6: so I can justify my hatred for it, Like I
Speaker 6: would go and be like, now I know for sure
Speaker 6: that I hate this. This sucks the people here, they're
Speaker 6: confused and flailing.
Speaker 5: That's what's happened, taken to a different world. So like
Speaker 5: I loved Sleep No More in New York, that thing
Speaker 5: where it was like you go in, I love that,
Speaker 5: And then like Beyonce's like a concert recently. Yeah, it's
Speaker 5: just like you get taken to a different place for
Speaker 5: a short period.
Speaker 6: Fake place that costs millions and millions of dollars but
Speaker 6: purporting to be an anti capitalist utopia. Instead, it costs
Speaker 6: several hundred million dollars to make, and the CEOs and
Speaker 6: the top ten people make over three hundred k a
Speaker 6: year to put it on. It is a hypocrisy, It
Speaker 6: is a farce, and it has become it has become
Speaker 6: a playground for the wealthy to destroy the environment essentially
Speaker 6: and and post something on Instagram that makes them feel
Speaker 6: like they're superior to people who don't go.
Speaker 1: That's what I viewed as.
Speaker 2: And I thought I thought it was free, but ticket
Speaker 2: prices start at five hundred bucks and vehicle passes are
Speaker 2: one hundred and year.
Speaker 6: You spend thousands of dollars to go, so This is
Speaker 6: not if you are It's like, if you are an
Speaker 6: actual person who lives in the desert and lives in
Speaker 6: a yur you cannot afford to go to Burning Man?
Speaker 3: Yeah wow, okay, are there scholarships and then?
Speaker 6: And like I understand the transformative experience in taking you
Speaker 6: to a new world. I'm not saying there's nothing good
Speaker 6: about Burning Man, but I do wonder for these people
Speaker 6: who have transformative experiences. Is Burning Man transformative? Or is
Speaker 6: doing shrooms and transformative?
Speaker 3: That's what it is?
Speaker 1: Is it because you did DMT? Is that why you're thinking.
Speaker 6: I mean, it's a cool place to do DMT, that's
Speaker 6: for sure, But I don't think Burning Man is a
Speaker 6: requirement to have a transformative experience on shrooms.
Speaker 5: I agree, But there you're also with like minded people,
Speaker 5: so like you're with you feel like you're in this
Speaker 5: ultimate safe space as like minded people, because that's the brand,
Speaker 5: you know, is like we're coming here to be like
Speaker 5: one hundred percent ourselves in some way, and then we
Speaker 5: have to go back to our lives.
Speaker 6: Except we know, I mean we're not. We're we know
Speaker 6: enough to know that if you get seventy thousand people
Speaker 6: in a spot you are not in a safe space.
Speaker 6: Out of those seventy thousand people, there's at least twenty
Speaker 6: five thousand people.
Speaker 1: Who have who are just weird.
Speaker 6: Yeah, and there is ten thousand people who have malicious intentions,
Speaker 6: not like I'm gonna kill you, but like I'm gonna
Speaker 6: try to fuck your girlfriend. And then there's gonna be
Speaker 6: five hundred people who probably are evil. That's just humanity.
Speaker 6: And now you're putting that's all together with no rules
Speaker 6: in the desert, there's no water, and you're setting things
Speaker 6: on fire and doing drugs and you're telling me this
Speaker 6: is what you want to spend three thousand dollars in
Speaker 6: a labor day weekend on.
Speaker 3: We need some one who's been to Burning Man on
Speaker 3: this show to speak, And.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean I am sort of like having their
Speaker 5: back in some reason the way I mean I mean
Speaker 5: safe space, like emotionally, I don't mean like physically. But
Speaker 5: I will also say that every institution that has ever existed,
Speaker 5: whether it starts with you know, good intentions or not,
Speaker 5: becomes perverted by people who will get into that institution
Speaker 5: and make it way worth I mean, I mean, you
Speaker 5: look at our government, you look at basically every religion,
Speaker 5: like all of those were probably started with the best
Speaker 5: of intentions and then have been perverted into something where
Speaker 5: it's like it all ends up being like, because we
Speaker 5: want to just make money and have power, you want
Speaker 5: anybody who wants to make money and have power will
Speaker 5: will seek an institution right that they can manipulate so
Speaker 5: that they can have power and make money, and burning
Speaker 5: man is no exception.
Speaker 3: Final thought. I was listening to this interesting podcast called
Speaker 3: Stuff You Should Know that I go to sleep listening
Speaker 3: to almost every single night, and it always helps me
Speaker 3: to sleep. But then I also learned something and it
Speaker 3: takes me probably like four weeks to get through one
Speaker 3: hour episode because I always fall asleep. But then I
Speaker 3: I slowly absorbed the information and there was this one
Speaker 3: episode about the Bilateral.
Speaker 4: Fuck.
Speaker 3: I forget what it was called, but it was something
Speaker 3: about how like when our brains when we snapped into
Speaker 3: consciousness as humans, there's a theory that before we had
Speaker 3: consciousness and had like our thoughts in our heads that
Speaker 3: we knew were our thoughts. We thought this is thousands
Speaker 3: of years ago. Before consciousness began, humans thought that thoughts
Speaker 3: in our heads were God or a ruler talking to us.
Speaker 3: So if you had the thought of, like I'm going
Speaker 3: to itch my leg, there wasn't the thought of like
Speaker 3: this is my leg, I'm itching it. It was God
Speaker 3: is telling me to itch my leg. It was. Any
Speaker 3: thought you had in your head was just God or
Speaker 3: the ruler, the ruler of your little before religion.
Speaker 1: So it was it was.
Speaker 4: It was.
Speaker 5: It was like basically, after you're smart enough to to
Speaker 5: like be aware of something before we were aware intelligent
Speaker 5: enough that we had like our own agency somewhere in
Speaker 5: between that in evolution.
Speaker 4: Yes, it wasn't.
Speaker 3: It was. It wasn't like a god like they didn't have.
Speaker 5: And Ronald was the one telling us to scratch it.
Speaker 5: Well you should not bad.
Speaker 3: That was really good. So it was it was an
Speaker 3: idea of God, of being like a supreme being. Like
Speaker 3: they didn't really have religion yet, but it was just
Speaker 3: this supreme being or they thought it was the voice
Speaker 3: of the ruler, the guy that was in charge of everything,
Speaker 3: like the kid that was in charge of the whatever
Speaker 3: tribe you were in. So no one was like I'm hungry.
Speaker 3: It was like God's telling me to eat. I'm just
Speaker 3: like it's almost the way I feel about free will
Speaker 3: where it's like their brains weren't them.
Speaker 4: They weren't like I am.
Speaker 3: It was just like I'm a robot operating on this
Speaker 3: system of someone's just feeding things into my brain and
Speaker 3: I'm acting on that. So that's what they all quote
Speaker 3: unquote thought, because thoughts weren't really what they were doing.
Speaker 3: They were just kind of working on this automatic response.
Speaker 3: Then at some point they became intelligent enough that it
Speaker 3: was around the Bronze Age, I believe when we started
Speaker 3: working with tools and it made our brain smarter because
Speaker 3: they figured out a way to make bronze that we
Speaker 3: snapped into consciousness and all of a sudden, it was
Speaker 3: like I like, I like, our brains became on one
Speaker 3: side of your brain and the other side of brain
Speaker 3: started working in tandem, and that became consciousness. I'm really
Speaker 3: like butchering what this means. But pretty much religion was
Speaker 3: invented for a nostalgia for that supreme being that used
Speaker 3: to tell you what to do. So these people suddenly
Speaker 3: were like, now I'm responsible for everything. I don't like this.
Speaker 3: I now need to invent a god because I miss
Speaker 3: the glory days of when I was just an automaton
Speaker 3: that was walking around like a zombie being told what
Speaker 3: to do by this god. And in religion, then this
Speaker 3: is all a theory based on like some anthropologists back
Speaker 3: in like the you know, in the twentieth century that
Speaker 3: came up with this theory. But it kind of all
Speaker 3: jobs together because it's like religion came right after consciousness
Speaker 3: probably showed up, and so we missed being just told
Speaker 3: what to do automatically and not having to like take
Speaker 3: accountability for our own actions, and so we invented religions
Speaker 3: to give us some sort of like pathway. And I
Speaker 3: just thought that was pretty interesting. And I love this
Speaker 3: show and it like, is is there anything that always
Speaker 3: puts you guys to sleep like this show? I don't
Speaker 3: know what it is. It reminds me of maybe my
Speaker 3: parents having a party in the living room. I was
Speaker 3: here like kind of muha voices or.
Speaker 1: Gates like the fall sleep.
Speaker 6: You're at a sleepover when you're a kid or something
Speaker 6: and you're and there's you're at camp and there's just
Speaker 6: two people chatting and you're just kind of listening, and
Speaker 6: it's just a safe place to be because you know,
Speaker 6: if there's two people having a casual conversation, then everything's
Speaker 6: probably pretty safe and you're not awake.
Speaker 4: Enough to fight off intruders.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and also there are probably people.
Speaker 3: To a caveman sense. Yeah, that's so funny. Abviy.
Speaker 2: We were on a road trip and then you know,
Speaker 2: like he he really likes history, and you know, like
Speaker 2: we'll watch documentaries and I'll always fall asleep. We were
Speaker 2: on a road trip once and he was listening to
Speaker 2: book on economics because that was his major, and he's
Speaker 2: like really into that stuff. I could not stay awake,
Speaker 2: Like I really tried to listen and synthesize, but I
Speaker 2: think it's so much information that my brain just shuts
Speaker 2: down and then I fall asleep.
Speaker 3: Yes, I think any kind of like knowledge, like when
Speaker 3: you're that, I think that's what the show is. I
Speaker 3: always pick a subject matter where it's like the you know,
Speaker 3: there was one about the end of the Bronze Age,
Speaker 3: which like the collapse of this like the world was
Speaker 3: doing great during the Bronze Age for like there was
Speaker 3: like societies and there was kind of beginnings of governments
Speaker 3: and everything, and then all of a sudden things started
Speaker 3: to fall apart and the society completely collapsed. And I'm kind
Speaker 3: of interested in that, because it seems to be what
Speaker 3: we're on the cusp of pretty soon, and I kind
Speaker 3: of want to hear how it begins and like how
Speaker 3: it starts and trickles down until everything is just chaos
Speaker 3: and ruined, because that's what happened, like everyone died off,
Speaker 3: all the society like there was obviously some people survived
Speaker 3: because we are here now. But so I'm just like,
Speaker 3: have you guys read the book Sapiens?
Speaker 5: Oh?
Speaker 1: I tried reading it.
Speaker 3: You love it? I tried.
Speaker 1: I just couldn't get.
Speaker 6: I tried to listen to it speaking. It's pretty dense
Speaker 6: and like, I don't know. I I tried to listen
Speaker 6: to it. I'd rather just get This is one of
Speaker 6: those instances where I'd rather just get a blinkst summary
Speaker 6: of it, because he just kept going on and on.
Speaker 6: I was like, do I really have to read all
Speaker 6: of this in order to understand what they're trying to say?
Speaker 1: Like what's your what's the point?
Speaker 6: I usually love shit like that, and I just couldn't
Speaker 6: get through Sapiens.
Speaker 3: I think I'll like it because it's linear and it
Speaker 3: like will take you because I feel like when I
Speaker 3: learn about history, it's like these moments, these little like
Speaker 3: batches of history, and I go, but how does that
Speaker 3: fit into the rest of it? Because I don't know,
Speaker 3: Like when people here's the dumbest question I've ever asked,
Speaker 3: maybe on the show, when people say B C E
Speaker 3: is E different? Does E add something different to BC? No,
Speaker 3: it's just ERA. I think, really, why are we throw
Speaker 3: it on an E?
Speaker 6: No?
Speaker 3: One needs that. Stop making it. You sound smarner than
Speaker 3: everyone else. So is the world just a D zero?
Speaker 3: And then BC? Is that all we do? Or is
Speaker 3: there something before BC?
Speaker 6: No, that's just it just keeps traveling back into eternity?
Speaker 6: Okay before Christ anodonomy, right, Louis. You know Louis.
Speaker 1: It's such a great joke because.
Speaker 3: He talks about like people in BC didn't know the
Speaker 3: date was like eighty BC, right, and then it would
Speaker 3: be weird, like on New Year's Eve they'd be like,
Speaker 3: and now it's seventy nine.
Speaker 4: He's like, what are we counting down to the fear
Speaker 4: of being like, wait, what is this all leading to?
Speaker 3: They didn't know Christ was coming and there was no
Speaker 3: date before then. It's such a brilliant it's.
Speaker 5: Such a ridiculous thing too, that like that we started
Speaker 5: time two thousand years ago. I mean I know that,
Speaker 5: like the Chinese calendar is on, like what is it
Speaker 5: like four thousand, seven hundred and ninety or something.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that huge calendar also is good.
Speaker 2: Oh really yeah, I think it's like fifty five hundred
Speaker 2: and change.
Speaker 1: I'm so ignorant FI or something. Three.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I did feel smart this weekend on the on
Speaker 3: the crossword puzzle.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, crossword puzzle.
Speaker 3: Like Brian, me and Chris have crossword competitions where we time.
Speaker 3: We know they're timed anyway, but we're trying to like
Speaker 3: we do like every every I would say, Monday through Friday.
Speaker 3: We send each other. Most of the crosswords has been
Speaker 3: a couple of weeks now and and see who wins.
Speaker 3: Brian is probably winning at this point.
Speaker 1: I've lost quite a lot. I mean just yesterday was
Speaker 1: a huge victory for me.
Speaker 3: Huge He beat me by like Chris and I did
Speaker 3: twelve twelve something minutes half.
Speaker 4: The time you did twelve. I did fourteen, And Brian
Speaker 4: died in the sevens.
Speaker 3: In the sevens on a Monday. It was really embarrassing
Speaker 3: for us over here. But I don't understand it because
Speaker 3: we are in love.
Speaker 1: There are people who can do next to.
Speaker 3: Each other and just staring at eyes were getting lost,
Speaker 3: so that if you you got to have Ali do
Speaker 3: it next to you too and see.
Speaker 6: If she doesn't do them at all. There are people
Speaker 6: who can do, especially the Monday crossword, in like under
Speaker 6: four minutes, like a sub four minute mile. And I
Speaker 6: don't even understand how you can type them in that fast.
Speaker 3: No, I know, because it if I even have a typo,
Speaker 3: I go I'm done. Yeah, like I'm gonna.
Speaker 4: Go I've screwed everything.
Speaker 6: Yes, if you're just reading the answers from an answer
Speaker 6: key typing it in, I would still think it would
Speaker 6: take four minutes.
Speaker 3: There are sometimes on a crossword where I feel like, oh,
Speaker 3: this one I got lucky because I remember in sixth
Speaker 3: grade we had someone come to talk to our class
Speaker 3: and he was from Berkina Fosso. Oh yeah, oh, otherwise
Speaker 3: I wouldn't know what Burkina Fosso was in a million years.
Speaker 3: And we had a hint the other day that was
Speaker 3: like country Burkina blank, and I was like, Fosso. That
Speaker 3: would have been one that I just was like, what
Speaker 3: the hell is this?
Speaker 4: You slum dog millionaireed it and.
Speaker 3: There are a lot of sports references where I go, well,
Speaker 3: Chris is gonna have the advantage here home court.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 5: Every time I see some sort of variation of a
Speaker 5: sport one, I'm like, there's how does Nikki ever get this?
Speaker 5: And I know that's like the point of crossword puzzles
Speaker 5: is that well the other letters?
Speaker 3: The answer is Untold, the documentary documentary series on Netflix
Speaker 3: that I am very much into, and I I have
Speaker 3: a lot of information about a couple certain things Malice
Speaker 3: at the Palace. If you want to know anything about
Speaker 3: the Ron art test fight in the stands, I got you.
Speaker 3: Johnny Manziel, I know all about him and Mantiteo. The
Speaker 3: I love sports like Jordan's Jordan, Oh my god.
Speaker 5: Well, I had a bit of a some something where
Speaker 5: it's like the only Nikki can only get into sports
Speaker 5: if it's like fifteen years ago present day sports. It
Speaker 5: is like not interesting to Nicki at all. It's like
Speaker 5: she needs to hear the story, the drama.
Speaker 3: Sure moments, I mean, I got I was very much
Speaker 3: involved in the Tanya Harding Nancy Kerrigan thing when I
Speaker 3: was in fifth grade. I was because it was captivated
Speaker 3: the nation. I mean there was crime involved. That was
Speaker 3: It was in fifth grade, and I was like, I
Speaker 3: knew all about it. My mom was, you know, up
Speaker 3: on it. My mom was a big Court TV watcher,
Speaker 3: even though that wasn't on Court TV or whatever, but
Speaker 3: she's just that kind of woman. I knew all about
Speaker 3: the OJ scandal. I was in sixth grade. I had
Speaker 3: strong opinions about OJ. But I love these sportsocks. If
Speaker 3: you guys have any suggestions listeners for good sports documentaries
Speaker 3: for me, please send them my way. We're gonna go
Speaker 3: back through thirty for thirties tell us which thirty for
Speaker 3: thirties are the best ones to watch. Chris does have
Speaker 3: an ESPN dot com subscription because he is a boy.
Speaker 4: Last night, I go, let's watch thirty for thirty.
Speaker 3: We were looking at one that we used to watch
Speaker 3: that we made fun of called Broke, where the whole
Speaker 3: time guys are just like man. We were spending. It's
Speaker 3: all about like diamonds, how true athletes go bankrupt fast,
Speaker 3: And the whole thing is just them being like man.
Speaker 3: We had cash flowing, strippers, cars, watches. They just listen and.
Speaker 4: The money wouldn't stop.
Speaker 3: It's a half hour of them listing things.
Speaker 5: They yeah, yeah, boats, boat yeah, cars, and it never ended,
Speaker 5: and we thought it would never end, and so we
Speaker 5: kept buying things shoes.
Speaker 4: Watch it.
Speaker 5: We're like, okay, cool, where's the story and they're like man, man.
Speaker 5: And then I kept buying things. Ever, I was buying
Speaker 5: things for my family.
Speaker 4: And the ground picks are all like money flowing down
Speaker 4: and like cleaning supplies backing up.
Speaker 3: It's like the dumb It's like v h one, like
Speaker 3: I love the nineties, but done ESPNS. It's so funny.
Speaker 3: So I go, we should watch that again, like we
Speaker 3: watched it in twenty fifteen. We've been making fun of
Speaker 3: it ever since. We didn't even finish it. I don't
Speaker 3: think we were just like this is ridiculous.
Speaker 4: It was just so I was like, we should watch
Speaker 4: it again, and last night I.
Speaker 3: Go, it's on. I go, we gotta buy it though
Speaker 3: it's ESPN dot Com And Chris was just like, babe,
Speaker 3: I don't think you said babe, but what were you said?
Speaker 4: I don't remember what I said.
Speaker 3: Do you think I don't have an ESPN dot com subscription?
Speaker 3: What do you even think of me?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 3: We do? Think you're driving with right now? I go
Speaker 3: a guy that does it. That's about to run out
Speaker 3: of gas.
Speaker 4: We won't need it at burning in this relationship.
Speaker 3: All right, Chris Convey, Happy birthday, than Thanks for spending
Speaker 3: your Thanks for waking up early to do the pod
Speaker 3: on your birth.
Speaker 5: Wouldn't have it any other way except except that I
Speaker 5: would be.
Speaker 4: Yesterday.
Speaker 3: We slept till we were in bed. You can get
Speaker 3: two two o'clock. We really did it. It was awesome.
Speaker 4: And then I will say we went to maybe we'll
Speaker 4: talk about.
Speaker 3: Tomorrow going to the Middle Eastern restaurant because I made
Speaker 3: you laugh by being myself.
Speaker 4: Oh I don't remember what you did?
Speaker 3: That's what do you do in there? Come on a
Speaker 3: little bit more.
Speaker 4: Does that ring a bell?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 4: What is that?
Speaker 3: Sir? Come on, you can do better. Okay, that's a
Speaker 3: teaser for tomorrow. All right, guys, thank you so much
Speaker 3: for listening to the podcast. As always, check out my
Speaker 3: tour Nikki Glazer dot com. Chicago Theater coming up September fifteenth,
Speaker 3: and you're in the Chicago area. If you have friends
Speaker 3: in the Chicago area, send them to my show. It's
Speaker 3: going to be so much freaking fun. Yes, Chris Convey's
Speaker 3: brother Tim is going to be opening for me on
Speaker 3: you will also be there. It's going to be one
Speaker 3: of the greatest shows of my life because it said
Speaker 3: this huge, amazing theater in Chicago where I just feel
Speaker 3: so special and I want you there, I want my
Speaker 3: besties there, and then the rest of the t is
Speaker 3: going to be so excellent. I'm so excited, but pale
Speaker 3: in comparison to the Chicago one. Yeah. Wait what No,
Speaker 3: Once I get to Chicago under my belt, which is
Speaker 3: the first one, the rest will feel much. They will,
Speaker 3: I will, I will. I'm gonna feel so good at
Speaker 3: any point in the tour you see me, I'm going
Speaker 3: to be I mean, I'm I'm cooking with gas right
Speaker 3: for my stand up.
Speaker 6: You're you're like building up this stuff. You're gonna go
Speaker 6: out there on this tour and you're gonna have so
Speaker 6: much new material and it's just going to be.
Speaker 1: You're so ready to go out on tour again.
Speaker 3: It's crazy, I know, and I thought I wouldn't be
Speaker 3: because I've been stagnant for two months. But I am ready.
Speaker 3: We gotta go. Thank you guys so much for listening.
Speaker 3: We'll see you tomorrow on the Poscably Cast. Don't Beka
Speaker 3: and just what.
Speaker 4: Give some more? I mean, you can give us some more,
Speaker 4: but that's not enough. Wait, what do you do with
Speaker 4: the eet see you tomorrow?