Speaker 1: Hell I Suck At Dating with Dean, Vanessa and Jared
Speaker 1: and I Heart Radio Podcast. Hello everyone, thank you for
Speaker 1: joining us on another non April Fools episode of Help
Speaker 1: I Suck At Dating. You've got your usual suspects in
Speaker 1: studio today, starting with me, Younglert, Vanessa Grimaldi in studio.
Speaker 1: Can you guys talk or am I just gonna be
Speaker 1: talking about I'm teasing these long breaks I'm seeing when
Speaker 1: Tara does it, he says in the Beautiful and he
Speaker 1: just like, yeah, I just really get you going. So
Speaker 1: you're ready to go for the podcast. I'm extending my
Speaker 1: my periods of silence so you guys can introduce yourselves. Well,
Speaker 1: I just flew in. Guys, I don't even know where
Speaker 1: I am right now or what time it is. You're
Speaker 1: on the Almost Famous podcast and he's Ashley and on
Speaker 1: beds again. Yeah, all over again. We'll welcome to a
Speaker 1: new episode of Help by Second Dating. The three of
Speaker 1: us are all in studios, so hopefully sound qualities a
Speaker 1: little bit better. This week, we have a special guest
Speaker 1: who is a little under the weather today, so she's
Speaker 1: going to call in, but she goes by the name
Speaker 1: of gig Gorgeous and it's something that we've been campaigning.
Speaker 1: At least Vanessa and I have been campaigning for a
Speaker 1: little bit now, and I've been campaigning you have, and
Speaker 1: Vanessa and I have been more vocal about campaigning for
Speaker 1: I am I. I want Gig on the podcast, not
Speaker 1: just Gi specifically, but it's always good to get different perspectives.
Speaker 1: So Gi Gorgeous, for those that don't know, is a
Speaker 1: transgender essentially a supermodel. It seems like stunning, stunning, beautiful woman.
Speaker 1: Um who She's a big part of the l g
Speaker 1: B t Q community. UM she is notoriously known for
Speaker 1: trans being a transgender from a man to a woman.
Speaker 1: She's very open and honest about that. So she's gonna
Speaker 1: be on the podcast a little bit later. Book that
Speaker 1: she's going to talk abouts are big on YouTube. She
Speaker 1: has a big YouTube following. She has a documentary where
Speaker 1: she from. Oh you you know you want me to
Speaker 1: say where she's from, So I actually want to ask
Speaker 1: her because it does say Montreal, because I did, like,
Speaker 1: I did do like a little bit of research. I'm like, wait,
Speaker 1: when she was diving in her documentary, I'm like, that
Speaker 1: looks like Lord Jobian, which is right next to my house.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry that France, Okay, So I'm don't to ask
Speaker 1: her if that if she's actually from Montreal, if she
Speaker 1: grew up in Toronto. But she's Canadian and that makes
Speaker 1: me really happy. And she's studying and has such an
Speaker 1: amazing story, So very excited for her to call in.
Speaker 1: But before we get to that, that's gonna be later
Speaker 1: on in the episode. Obviously we're blessed with Vanessa's presence
Speaker 1: in studio today. Vanessa, why are you in studio? So?
Speaker 1: We had the wine tour with I Heart Radio? Where
Speaker 1: was that in Napa Valley? Dean? Where were you? Oh?
Speaker 1: Not there? Why weren't you there? But you're too cool
Speaker 1: for school? It's not can't travel their over here just
Speaker 1: to hang out with me? Yeah, two days before, did
Speaker 1: your boyfriend come with you? No, he didn't because he's
Speaker 1: in Uh he wasn't Toronto. Oh well, that's okay. And
Speaker 1: who's all there? Jared Ashley, Vanessa ben Wells. As you
Speaker 1: said earlier, the usual suspects, suspect Blank Blake is going
Speaker 1: to be there. Yeah, Derek Pets but Blake. You know,
Speaker 1: it's somebody that we just saw this past weekend. But
Speaker 1: it's somebody that you should be seeing. Well just in
Speaker 1: a couple of months, get down in a beach in Mexico.
Speaker 1: Really great transition, man. Yeah, I try any updates on that?
Speaker 1: About that I message you, remember, I got so mad
Speaker 1: at did I tell you everything? Why didn't you tell me?
Speaker 1: You said, just a paradise? No, no, no, no. This
Speaker 1: is what Vanessa does. Vanessa text me and says, Dean,
Speaker 1: I tell you everything. I can't believe you didn't tell
Speaker 1: me this big secret, and that's it. And then it
Speaker 1: cuts off and I said I was like, I was like,
Speaker 1: what did she find out? Um? And then she goes,
Speaker 1: you're going to Paradise. You didn't tell me. Nothing is confirmed,
Speaker 1: you guys, so hold on. So that means you didn't
Speaker 1: say no. I haven't said yes either, committed, I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't know. So if you were to go on Paradise,
Speaker 1: what would you would you be going on for fun?
Speaker 1: For to gain followers, to find love. That's kind of
Speaker 1: why I get to give an answer, because I haven't
Speaker 1: really figured out what I want out of anything. Great
Speaker 1: for our podcast, just take one from a business perspective, fantastic,
Speaker 1: we'll get We'll get a couple of extra listeners for
Speaker 1: a couple of extra weeks while the season is airing.
Speaker 1: Totally worth it, right, Yeah, yeah, well yeah for you guys,
Speaker 1: it's it's a zero risk, zero risk for you. I
Speaker 1: just really hope that you pull up into Paradise with
Speaker 1: your van, drive down there, take a little road trip.
Speaker 1: Instead of coming down the stairs, you just pull up
Speaker 1: right in front of the stairs. I was thinking about
Speaker 1: of the van. I was actually thinking about this, like,
Speaker 1: if I were to go through with Paradise. You guys
Speaker 1: know that I got my sky diving license, how cool
Speaker 1: would it be the skydive onto the beach? Yeah, that
Speaker 1: seems like it's that beach is quite such a bachelor move.
Speaker 1: Though it would be pretty bad. Isn't dangerous to skydiving
Speaker 1: water as well? Well, there's just like winds that come
Speaker 1: off the water over the land that are kind of dangerous.
Speaker 1: But at that point I'll have enough jumps to where
Speaker 1: I'm comfortable doing that. We don't want Yeah, yeah, but no,
Speaker 1: like nothing is confirmed. I don't know what do you
Speaker 1: guys think. Obviously, you guys both want me to do it.
Speaker 1: I want you to do it. If you're to do
Speaker 1: it and not end up regretting it. Did you ender
Speaker 1: regretting the last time? Well, one time you went. The
Speaker 1: thing that is different this time around is going into
Speaker 1: every show, I've been in a mindset that I haven't
Speaker 1: really been in that I am now like going into
Speaker 1: Bachelor mindset is up. Going to the Bachelorette, I was
Speaker 1: open to new opportunities, not really sure what would come
Speaker 1: from it, um looking for, like to mix up my
Speaker 1: life in spite of my life a little bit. So
Speaker 1: that was my mindset going into that. Going into Paradise,
Speaker 1: the first Bachelor Paradise immediate following Bachelorette, I was like
Speaker 1: in a weird place, you know. I just came off Bachelorette,
Speaker 1: like literally three weeks prior um, Like financially, I wasn't
Speaker 1: really comfortable all that kind of stuff, and I didn't
Speaker 1: really know what was gonna come of all of this.
Speaker 1: And then going into Bachelor Winter Games, my headspace was
Speaker 1: all messed up. Obviously. I was so kind of um
Speaker 1: torn up from my Bachelor and Paradise experience, and I
Speaker 1: figured going into Winter Games might help me get over that.
Speaker 1: Obviously that's not the case. And so for the first
Speaker 1: time out of any of the Bachelor's shows again. If
Speaker 1: I were to do Bachelor in Paradise, which not confirming
Speaker 1: nor denying anything right now, um, it would be the
Speaker 1: first time where like I'm fully saying, like fully comfortable
Speaker 1: with who I am, not like hung up on anything
Speaker 1: in the past. Uh like almost like a fresh start.
Speaker 1: Not even a fresh start, but it's like I'm finally
Speaker 1: like happy, Like financially speaking, I'm good, emotionally speaking, I'm
Speaker 1: good mentally speaking, I'm good like all of these things.
Speaker 1: And so it's like for that reason, it would kind
Speaker 1: of be like, okay, like maybe we can give us
Speaker 1: a go, where like everything is kind of running on
Speaker 1: all cylinders. I just want you to go because I
Speaker 1: feel like so many past contestants that have turned down
Speaker 1: Paradise look back and say, why the hell did I
Speaker 1: say no? Like it's well, they keep asking me. They
Speaker 1: asked me again this well, one of the producers. Every
Speaker 1: time I hear from her, I'm like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: I like it's been so long, so excited to hear
Speaker 1: from you. And then I like, you just want me
Speaker 1: to know, you want to know if I'm single. And
Speaker 1: so I was asked again for this season, and of
Speaker 1: course it's a compliment because like once I'm you know,
Speaker 1: once they stop asking, it's like, well, you're kind of
Speaker 1: like old new old news, don't really wants anymore. So
Speaker 1: I'm like, no, I'm gonna I'm happily in a relationship now,
Speaker 1: you know, I don't. I mean, I can't predict the future,
Speaker 1: but I do suppose that I will still be with
Speaker 1: him come summertime. So I'm maybe I can give out
Speaker 1: a date card. It would be cool. I mean, give
Speaker 1: some dating advice podcast on dating. From the production standpoint,
Speaker 1: I don't really see why they would be exactly makes sense. Hey,
Speaker 1: put it out there. You never know what's gonna happen.
Speaker 1: The challenging thing, too, is essentially for me go to
Speaker 1: going to if I were to go to Paradise, Like
Speaker 1: I'm a I'm a pretty controversial figure, I think in
Speaker 1: terms of Bachelor Nation, So it's like that could go
Speaker 1: either way for me, in terms of a girl being
Speaker 1: like kind of uh drawn to that or just completely
Speaker 1: going to block me up. But those are things, those
Speaker 1: are things that are such outside of your control that
Speaker 1: you can't say yes or no because of that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I guess, but it's like sometimes you might not even
Speaker 1: get a fair shot just because of what you've been
Speaker 1: labeled from the past. I think if somebody doesn't give
Speaker 1: you a fair shot because of how you were labeled
Speaker 1: and past, that person is not for you anyway. That's
Speaker 1: fair now and now you wouldn't want to be with
Speaker 1: that person anyway. Did you slide into anyone's damns UM season? Well,
Speaker 1: we had Brion the podcast back in UM we talked
Speaker 1: a little bit. But did you hang out outside of
Speaker 1: talking on social media? No? Not yet, not yet, but
Speaker 1: kalyn s yours a long time ago. That's been obviously there.
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna like, yeah, a few of them have
Speaker 1: slid into my d m oh so more than just
Speaker 1: two of them. Yes, I'm not gonna name names obviously,
Speaker 1: but it's like, can you give us the first letter?
Speaker 1: Maybe their initially absolutely not. I got to tease it
Speaker 1: a little bit, but that's that's what I'm saying. It's like, Okay, sure,
Speaker 1: I guess it would be still fun to go to
Speaker 1: the beach and hang out with people. I mean, look,
Speaker 1: Melbie came out of it and she ended up becoming
Speaker 1: friends with people. Yeah, I don't know. I also kind
Speaker 1: of like as great as the Bachelor franchise has been
Speaker 1: to me and to all of us, I kind of
Speaker 1: like want to remove myself from it makes sense, you know,
Speaker 1: Like I don't want to be known as Dean from
Speaker 1: The Bachelor, unbeknown as like Dean the guy that does
Speaker 1: cool things and travels all over the world. Yeah. I
Speaker 1: don't know. It's just there's a lot of conflicting ideas
Speaker 1: that like someone are encouraging me to do it, and
Speaker 1: some are saying me for me not to do it,
Speaker 1: And again maybe like I'm not even desire to go
Speaker 1: back from a production standpoint a like no one's asked
Speaker 1: me from the production side of things lying, So it's
Speaker 1: like who the hell knows seen from the Bachelor. Hey, listen,
Speaker 1: try being known as Mr Ashley. I, Um, you're Mr Connetti,
Speaker 1: Mr i Connetti. Well, no, that's weird because that's Actuley's
Speaker 1: dad's name. Because I still get I still get a
Speaker 1: congratulations on your engagement. That's kind of depressing. I'm sorry
Speaker 1: about that that. I know we've talked about this, and
Speaker 1: I'm sure you actually talked about it. But when you
Speaker 1: guys get married, it's gonna be Ashley high Bond. But
Speaker 1: she's still gonna go by. I think she's gonna obviously
Speaker 1: she wants to change her name, um, but she's definitely
Speaker 1: gonna still go by. I think Ashley I as her
Speaker 1: like you know, but like her name. I don't even
Speaker 1: not say that. Her driver's license will still say government
Speaker 1: her government name. Change her name at some point, yeah,
Speaker 1: but we're talking to Jade about that, because Jade actually
Speaker 1: didn't legally change her name to Tolbert. I think till
Speaker 1: like a year afterwards, I think she said, And so
Speaker 1: who knows will happen, but well, you know, we'll do
Speaker 1: that well when we get that. I've always been very
Speaker 1: very pro taking my wife's last name, but now kids
Speaker 1: would have your wife's last name. Yeah, so it could
Speaker 1: be like Dean Grimaldi. I've always I've always been pro that,
Speaker 1: but now it's weird because like similar to actually I canetti,
Speaker 1: like Ungler is so unique that there's only I'm the
Speaker 1: only de Ungler on the entire planet, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean, There's just aren't many Unglers. It's like a
Speaker 1: very unique lass name. Yeah. Um, And so like if
Speaker 1: say Mary h a girl with a very more like
Speaker 1: a much more common last name, like he kind of
Speaker 1: lose the identity a little bit, like the note, not
Speaker 1: the notoriety, but like the like the viduality. So that's
Speaker 1: like the only thing that would maybe inhibit me considering that. Now,
Speaker 1: I agree with that as well, because I feel bad
Speaker 1: because Ashley and Lauren are the last two I Canetti's,
Speaker 1: so like the I Canettie name will die. That's the thing.
Speaker 1: I have two older brothers and so they're probably gonna
Speaker 1: have kids at some point, so the Ungler name will
Speaker 1: live on. Well that's nice. That's a nice security blanket
Speaker 1: I have. Yeah, But for me, I think the Haybond,
Speaker 1: the Haybond name will live on. There's how many times
Speaker 1: I'm making a mispronounce your name a bond hie Hi
Speaker 1: like a pastry. Well, another question I have for you,
Speaker 1: Dean and Vanessa as well, is that listen, you might
Speaker 1: go down to Paradise. Who knows, you might meet somebody.
Speaker 1: I remember my season of Paradise Grant in lace when
Speaker 1: they got together, they got matching tattoos of each other.
Speaker 1: You guys remember this at all? Yeah, yeah, a little
Speaker 1: premature because obviously it didn't work out unfortunately, and they
Speaker 1: got the matching tattoos, So I don't know if you
Speaker 1: just change that. What are your guys thoughts about couples
Speaker 1: getting matching tattoos. I am the cheesiest person ever, so
Speaker 1: of course I'm gonna say yes to matching anything, matching outfits,
Speaker 1: matching tattoos. I like the idea. Can we say that
Speaker 1: there's a big difference between matching outfits and matching if
Speaker 1: I'm if I'm seriously going to be with someone for
Speaker 1: the rest of my life, then why not. I don't
Speaker 1: have a tattoo, and I would love to get one,
Speaker 1: and I think it'd be a meaningful thing if my
Speaker 1: significant other, my husband, and I end up getting something
Speaker 1: that's match Yeah, I'm not you guys know me. I
Speaker 1: get a bunch of dump tattoes all the time, So
Speaker 1: another tattoo. Really, it's not that it's meaningless to me.
Speaker 1: It's it's not as big as a step ye. And
Speaker 1: I guess you can always switch it up if it's
Speaker 1: I guess you could change it, but it is kind
Speaker 1: of permanent. I mean, you can get it removed, but
Speaker 1: it won't there be a scar there. So it's kind
Speaker 1: of like a right well for for you guys, because
Speaker 1: neither of you have tattoos, right, I don't have any
Speaker 1: tattoos I have like I think I kind of the
Speaker 1: other have like nineteen tattoos, So what do you have nineteen? Well,
Speaker 1: they're just kind of all the spread. Yeah, theyre random.
Speaker 1: But I'm saying it, from nineteen to twenty tattoos isn't
Speaker 1: as big of a deal as from zero to one tattoo,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. So it's like, sure, I'll
Speaker 1: get your name tattooed to my butt totally. It makes
Speaker 1: a difference if I got a tattoo of actually be
Speaker 1: very significant because it's my first tattoo at But now
Speaker 1: that I'm thirty, I kind of go back and forth
Speaker 1: through I want to get a tattoo at this point
Speaker 1: after thirty years later, you get it somewhere that you
Speaker 1: can't visibly see it. So don't get like the Superman
Speaker 1: asked on my chest? Is that what you're saying? But
Speaker 1: with the butt cheek left or right, you Vanessa, I'm
Speaker 1: having to do. I'm never wearing tattoos. It doesn't have
Speaker 1: to be at the same spot, just the same. I
Speaker 1: have matched tattoos with some of my best friend ends.
Speaker 1: My uh John butler TiO tattoo and my HHS tattoo
Speaker 1: in my carpet knocked him tattoo. What's three best friend tattoos?
Speaker 1: What's the car My one of my best friends in
Speaker 1: high school got carpet d M on his hip, and
Speaker 1: me and my other best friend when we were in
Speaker 1: college were like making fun of him, like, creiks such
Speaker 1: a loser for getting carpet dum on his hip, which
Speaker 1: we get to make fun of him. And so instead
Speaker 1: of getting carpet DM, we got carpet knocked him on
Speaker 1: the same spot, which means I'm sure you can surmize
Speaker 1: what carpet Knocktom means if you know what carpet dum means,
Speaker 1: I don't carpet dum sees the day carpet knocked him,
Speaker 1: of course, would then mean seized the night. So you
Speaker 1: make him sarcastically getting a tattoo on the same location. Ye, yep,
Speaker 1: we definitely want to exchange. Nineteen year old Dean is
Speaker 1: super proud of that one. Um. Well, if you get
Speaker 1: matching tattoos, do they have to be in the same spot. So,
Speaker 1: for example, hypothetically speaking Dean and Vanessa, you guys end
Speaker 1: up getting married. Uh, would you get like a tattoo?
Speaker 1: Are like Dean? If you got a tattoo in your
Speaker 1: forearm and you wanted to get a matching tattoo, I
Speaker 1: wouldn't get on my farm. I don't think i'd be matching,
Speaker 1: to be honest, ankle, but like, is it matching tattoos
Speaker 1: if you get the same exact tattoo, but yours is
Speaker 1: on your ankle and Dean yours is on your hand. Yes, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's fair. I don't know these things I would like
Speaker 1: to be. I think I would like it should be
Speaker 1: exactly at the same spot. I don't know if I
Speaker 1: would get I think like it would be cute if
Speaker 1: I got a star and she got a moon or
Speaker 1: something like that. You know, like it wouldn't be exactly matching,
Speaker 1: but like same significant best friends. So like Vanessa would
Speaker 1: have the key and you'd have the lock. Yeah, well
Speaker 1: I would have the key and you done the lock. Yeah, well,
Speaker 1: whichever one you guys decide on. Oh yeah, I guess
Speaker 1: I would have a lock. Yeah, I got hold on.
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Speaker 1: guys feel about nicknames for your significant others? I so
Speaker 1: this is this is the first relationship I'm in and
Speaker 1: that I don't call him babe. I love that, yeah,
Speaker 1: because I find of like everyone calls each other. The
Speaker 1: baby's the most uninspired nickname of all times. So he
Speaker 1: has salt and pepper hair, more salt than peppers, I
Speaker 1: call him salt. Would baby considered a nickname because they're
Speaker 1: not calling the person by their first name? Yeah, but
Speaker 1: I feel like, wait, I just realized nickname No, um,
Speaker 1: I just feel like babe is like a term thrown around.
Speaker 1: I would to consider a nickname, like, for example, a nickname, Well,
Speaker 1: what is the definition of a nickname? A nickname is
Speaker 1: like something endearing? Yeah, I don't So what do you
Speaker 1: call Ashley babe? Really? Sometimes I call it just like
Speaker 1: I don't have Like I don't say pumpkin, Like my
Speaker 1: dad calls my mom and my specifically my sister pumpkin.
Speaker 1: That's cute, or uh, what does he call her? Oh?
Speaker 1: He called her one thing is so embarrassing one time
Speaker 1: she was a teenager. He called her like schnook ms
Speaker 1: or something like that. Yeah, when you're a teenager, you
Speaker 1: don't your first name and anything. But it was so
Speaker 1: I think now I think back upon it, Like dad,
Speaker 1: I think it's the first when a couple has names
Speaker 1: that they call each other that only they referred to
Speaker 1: them as, you know, something short, something simple, but something
Speaker 1: like kind of like almost sarcastic in a sense, but cute. Yeah,
Speaker 1: something that has a meaning behind it. Yeah, I agree
Speaker 1: with that one. Josh had no idea what salt meant
Speaker 1: when I when I called him that, but um well,
Speaker 1: I said salt in a text mess and he actually
Speaker 1: googled it to figure out, like what does salt mean?
Speaker 1: And I'm like, no, it's just a nickname I gave you.
Speaker 1: But in the movie with Angelina, Jelly popped up, why
Speaker 1: is that a movie? Right with Salt? Or it's called
Speaker 1: Salt with Angela need to watch movies? What nicknames have
Speaker 1: you given your exes? I feel we're talking about that
Speaker 1: because they might hear this and then you know, but
Speaker 1: it's like it's original names. Yeah, but the problem is too,
Speaker 1: I'm sure you guys, you really so you don't reoccur,
Speaker 1: you don't use never. Well, here's the thing. So that's
Speaker 1: why I think babe is not a nickname because it
Speaker 1: just blanket terms like the one that you love. I
Speaker 1: just I think it's inspired. It's like, be a little
Speaker 1: bit more creative than that, you know. Yeah, but I
Speaker 1: don't like, what's something that makes Ashley Ashley in your eyes?
Speaker 1: What makes Ashley Ashley in your eyes? Yeah? Her over exaggeration,
Speaker 1: So yeah, I would call it like Coco Puffs or
Speaker 1: something you want me to call Ashley Coops. I honestly
Speaker 1: think that's a good, right suggestion, and we can maybe
Speaker 1: like more of like a Captain crunch guy. But but
Speaker 1: actually is cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs PUFs, No, no, no no,
Speaker 1: I'm she's the Coco Puffs and I'm cuckoo for Coco Pups. Okay,
Speaker 1: there you go. So she's Coco Puffs and for her.
Speaker 1: I got it. We just created a game. You're welcome.
Speaker 1: So I'm trying to create actually a nickname for Dean
Speaker 1: right now, but it's getting hard, you know, do you know?
Speaker 1: I would say, I googled nicknames and there's a name
Speaker 1: generator website where you can create a nickname for someone
Speaker 1: and so, okay, it's asking for three adjectives that describe
Speaker 1: him or her. So what are three adjectives that described Dean?
Speaker 1: This is a fun game, handsome, that's about it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm thinking you're very good look I would say, um, like,
Speaker 1: I hate saying that, but you're you're just so uniquely
Speaker 1: good looking. I gotta put it. Appreciate that. There you go.
Speaker 1: I'm so happy that you accept the compliments very unexpectedly patical,
Speaker 1: like he doesn't well now he's starting to shower with
Speaker 1: soap and stuff. But it's very like earthy like that,
Speaker 1: like a mountain man. Mountain man, so handsome, earthy and
Speaker 1: my personality. I feel like this is very witty, all right,
Speaker 1: I mean, I guess that's how post Malone got his name.
Speaker 1: Are you serious? Oh? Can we do me after all? Right?
Speaker 1: Here we go? So some some nicknames for Deanie, dusky Dean,
Speaker 1: dead pan Dean, Dean, the drool Dean, the droll excuse me, uh,
Speaker 1: dreamy Dean, dashing Dean, Dean, the darling. I kind of
Speaker 1: like that one, down to earth Dean, darring Dean, delightful
Speaker 1: Dean um. And that's kind of it right now. Oh,
Speaker 1: here we go everything that starts with the dean. These
Speaker 1: are all initial based nicknames, allations. How about do you? Yeah?
Speaker 1: I go by do you? Well, I don't go by
Speaker 1: to you. I'm sorry, but those are my initials, so
Speaker 1: of course you have. But do you kind of sounds cool?
Speaker 1: Do you coming? You know? I used to funny coming
Speaker 1: to the stage. This can actually kind of exemplify who
Speaker 1: I am as a person now. When I was in
Speaker 1: elementary school, I made people call me d d you
Speaker 1: you like double du w, And what I said it
Speaker 1: stood for was deaned dumb ugly anglert. And it's just
Speaker 1: funny to think about how now I'm still the same
Speaker 1: self deprecating that I was even when I was five
Speaker 1: years ago. I'm reading this book called the Happiness Equation,
Speaker 1: and in one chapter it says, how do you gain
Speaker 1: confidence and how do you gain respect from other people? Well,
Speaker 1: one of the reasons why people will what you feel
Speaker 1: where people could either look down upon you or make
Speaker 1: fun of your whatever, is because you allow that window
Speaker 1: of opportunity because you're self deprecating totally. It's kind of
Speaker 1: like when it's accepting the love that you think you deserve.
Speaker 1: But here's but here's let's let's flip it around real quick. Um,
Speaker 1: have you guys ever made fun of me to my face? No,
Speaker 1: because I'm because I'm make fun of my time. But
Speaker 1: I'm saying, if you make fun of yourself enough, then
Speaker 1: other people aren't going to make fun of you. Know what.
Speaker 1: It's like a defense mechanism, exactly stop it. And it's
Speaker 1: it's a sign of humbleness. Yeah, humility when it's when
Speaker 1: it's too much. It's not when it's too much, it's
Speaker 1: a lack of self confidence. Now you're trying to overcompensate.
Speaker 1: I agree with you to a certain extent. What I
Speaker 1: can't stand is when people make fun of themselves for
Speaker 1: things that they know, um are just not true. For example,
Speaker 1: if Dean was like if Dean made fun of himself
Speaker 1: constantly because he said, I'm oh, God, I just hate
Speaker 1: my face. I think I'm so ugly, but shut up
Speaker 1: exactly because he's fishing for compliments because he knows he's
Speaker 1: good looking, but he's actually self deprecating about things that
Speaker 1: he's insecure about, which I like because I've met other
Speaker 1: guys who are strikingly good looking, Like, for example, I
Speaker 1: would never say to myself, God, I hate my jaw,
Speaker 1: like I'm confident enough to know that's one part of
Speaker 1: me that I'm confident in. Yeah, like God, I had
Speaker 1: this awful like just double chin. It's it's just not see.
Speaker 1: I get the opposite though, because I'm a female and
Speaker 1: I'm so insecure about my weight, I always think I'm
Speaker 1: way too skinny. Like yesterday, I was out with my
Speaker 1: boyfriend and well, well, actually no, I wasn't because this
Speaker 1: is I was in the wine tour. So last week
Speaker 1: I was out with my man and man man is
Speaker 1: that a nick my man? No? Right, I don't think
Speaker 1: babe is. I don't think my man is because that's
Speaker 1: like to ownership. Ye. So anyways, that was shopping. I'm like,
Speaker 1: oh my god. Every hour I'm like, I have to eat.
Speaker 1: I have to eat something. I'm getting too hungry because
Speaker 1: in my head, I come from an Italian background and
Speaker 1: you have to be a little bit like I'm considered
Speaker 1: way too skinny in my culture. So when people come
Speaker 1: up to me, to me and they're like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: you lost so much weight, I get so insecure. But
Speaker 1: I can't talk. But I can't talk about it as
Speaker 1: a female because I get told, what are you guys
Speaker 1: laughing at? No, No, we're listening. He's generating a name,
Speaker 1: a nickname for you right now. Dean is and the
Speaker 1: adjectives that he put in were boobs, god, I don't
Speaker 1: even have boobs hot and was the third one family family? Okay, great,
Speaker 1: So what do we generate for nicknames for Essa? But
Speaker 1: my favorite one is Vanessa the JJ Oh, but I
Speaker 1: don't like these alliterate of nicknames. I think they're quite fun.
Speaker 1: And Penny, well it's not really a pun, it's just
Speaker 1: an alliteration. And that one anyway, Sorry, that was the
Speaker 1: best one. Vanessa the I'm sorry, Vanessa the Balls, Vaness
Speaker 1: of the Vagina. I like Vanessa the jjjin. I don't
Speaker 1: understand how people think you're too skinny. Yeah, you're like
Speaker 1: the perfect way, thank you. But I just I've just
Speaker 1: found it just never compliment on a never comment on
Speaker 1: a girl's first I actually, I actually, um, I didn't
Speaker 1: talk to a friend of mine for about six months
Speaker 1: when he told me, He's like, you're way too skinny,
Speaker 1: like and and I was like, but here's the thing.
Speaker 1: If I say you're not skinny, then I'm basically saying, oh,
Speaker 1: you're a little too heavy. You could stay in the
Speaker 1: loosen weight, you know what I mean, unless you say
Speaker 1: that she's the perfect. Way it happens in society is
Speaker 1: that we think going up to a female or to
Speaker 1: anyone really male or female and saying, wow, you look good,
Speaker 1: did you lose weight? How is that a compliment? Why
Speaker 1: does that have to be the compliment? Well, because if
Speaker 1: somebody was a little bit overweight prior. I think they
Speaker 1: want to hear hey, but we don't know. Maybe that's
Speaker 1: what that's what society made us believe that we need
Speaker 1: to give us a compliment. But it's for me, it's
Speaker 1: not necessary. It's not a compliment. For a lot of
Speaker 1: people in my surround, in my social group, it's not
Speaker 1: a compliment either. I think for me, it all depends
Speaker 1: on the situation. Because if there's somebody who is overweight
Speaker 1: actively trying to lose weight and you notice it, I
Speaker 1: would definitely compliment them on. I would compliment them just
Speaker 1: because I would want them to know that their work
Speaker 1: that they're putting in is showing dividends. Um, I just
Speaker 1: think thin is in. So I'm trying to drop some
Speaker 1: weight and I've actually put on a little bit of weight.
Speaker 1: So if if I go to Paradise, you don't look
Speaker 1: like it. Thank you so much, Jared, I really appreciate that.
Speaker 1: If you have you hold it well. If I go
Speaker 1: to Paradise perfect way, in the best shape of my life. There,
Speaker 1: you're in great shape as well. We saw. Oh I
Speaker 1: am not alright perfectly. We have gig gorgeous calling in
Speaker 1: in about seven minutes. So what I want to do
Speaker 1: in the meantime before gig comes in. Is I have
Speaker 1: that little fun rapid Fire Question game that I love
Speaker 1: playing with Diana Vanessa because we just love finding out
Speaker 1: more about our beautiful host over here. This is honestly
Speaker 1: my favorite thing about this podcast. Perfect. Well, here we go.
Speaker 1: Hopefully it goes well. This is Rapid Fire Question ten
Speaker 1: questions with and Vanessa, hosted by me Um. Here we go.
Speaker 1: Number one texting or talking? Talking? What year? I think
Speaker 1: we have this question like a different variation. Hate talking
Speaker 1: on the phone, person talking in person, connecting, looking into
Speaker 1: each other's eyes. I'm I'm a Texter because it's just
Speaker 1: like talking talking on the phone in such a commitment.
Speaker 1: Are you are? I feel like you're an extrovert. Introvert? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I re charge your mind by myself. He being in public, Well,
Speaker 1: that's why you just traveled by yourself all the time
Speaker 1: to god knows where? Uh. Number two, what was the
Speaker 1: last song you downloaded on iTunes? Oh? Probably a song
Speaker 1: by Mahalia. I don't use iTunes that you Spotify Spotify.
Speaker 1: Last song you download on Spotify? Well, on Spotify, I
Speaker 1: like the Happy List, the Happy Hits, The Happy Hits,
Speaker 1: You're a very positive person for this. You're always optimistic
Speaker 1: about things. Oh god, no, I'm not really. I find
Speaker 1: that you always find the silver lining. I'm very black
Speaker 1: and white. So when I'm really happy, I'm like and
Speaker 1: then when I'm really sad, let me be depressed, and
Speaker 1: I can go into a depressive state for like a
Speaker 1: day or two and like cry, not want to leave
Speaker 1: my place, and like anxiety kicks in. When I was
Speaker 1: coming out here, my separation, anxiety with my boyfriend was
Speaker 1: on another level, and I was asking you when I
Speaker 1: saw you, do you get that with Ashley? Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: all the time. We can talk more about that after Gigi,
Speaker 1: So I'd love to talk more about it. Dean was
Speaker 1: the last song. It was waiting for the Alex Sholes remix.
Speaker 1: Very nice. Vanessa dri answer this. Yeah, it's like the
Speaker 1: Happy a song by Majelia. She's from London, England. The
Speaker 1: last song I downloaded was from the US soundtrack and
Speaker 1: it was the I Got five on it, but the
Speaker 1: Tethered mix. Did you see us recently? Yeah? I saw
Speaker 1: and there's this Day played the song and that like
Speaker 1: slow Heart horrific remix. I thought on Friday it was
Speaker 1: good it's good. What's going on here? That was my bad. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I was spostly surprised by us. I'm a real whist
Speaker 1: when it comes to scary movies, and that one I
Speaker 1: wasn't really scared, but I was interested the whole time,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. It's a very it sticks
Speaker 1: with you. It's certainly a movie that sticks with you,
Speaker 1: all right. Number three Bachelor question. If you were in
Speaker 1: a disaster movie right now and you needed to pick
Speaker 1: one person from Bachelor family to be the star, the
Speaker 1: one to rescue you, for example, someone who to play
Speaker 1: the tom cruise, the rock, so on and so forth,
Speaker 1: man or woman, who would you choose has to be
Speaker 1: from Bachelor Taylor Nolan. Yeah, she's like the She's she's
Speaker 1: so incapable of rescuing you know, I'm physically impossible. Yeah,
Speaker 1: for sure, maybe she would. She can be like, um,
Speaker 1: you know, I don't know, one of those superheroes that
Speaker 1: use their Here's the question that I follow a questions
Speaker 1: for that question, Jared, is is this person actively trying
Speaker 1: to rescue me? Or do they like If they don't
Speaker 1: like me, No, it doesn't matter. They just care about
Speaker 1: humanity and no matter what they like you or don't
Speaker 1: like you, they're going to try to save your life.
Speaker 1: Probably Chad. I was Chad too. Maybe it's just a
Speaker 1: physique because of how strong he looks. He looks like
Speaker 1: he looks like he would just tear a building down
Speaker 1: his two hands or to move it out of the way.
Speaker 1: But the thing is that he's not very he's not
Speaker 1: very personally invested in me. I think it's pretty well
Speaker 1: known that both of us don't really like each other.
Speaker 1: So it's like, if he had to rescue me, would
Speaker 1: sure that's a good question though, because would he Because
Speaker 1: would would Chad rescue other people? Or would he just
Speaker 1: bulldozed to save himself? I changed my mind. Actually, Alex
Speaker 1: Bortikov would be my choice. He's got he's got the
Speaker 1: emotional connection. You know, he wants to save my life
Speaker 1: because we love each other. And I think he could
Speaker 1: probably bea chat up in a fight too, So you
Speaker 1: would see how it's so funny. You guys went straight
Speaker 1: to physical and I went to mental. I'm like, oh,
Speaker 1: I know Taylor would like protect me, like emotionally and
Speaker 1: mentally physically. Forget it, that makes sense why Jared and
Speaker 1: I would survive and you would not. My choice is
Speaker 1: My choice is pen Higgins because I think he would
Speaker 1: sacrifice himself for me, for all of us, really, because
Speaker 1: he's just that type of question. Number four, who is
Speaker 1: your first celebrity crush? Hand? Sorry? Wow, sorry Zach, And
Speaker 1: it's not your brother Zack Hanson. Zach Hanson, what you
Speaker 1: go first? Of you? And actually could have some long
Speaker 1: conversations about that. Really, Yeah, we did. That makes sense. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't know why I was so surprised by that,
Speaker 1: go you go first of all. I think of mine.
Speaker 1: It's a tie. It's between to Pangaea or the Pink Ranger.
Speaker 1: Now I forget her name, but she was Susie Q
Speaker 1: in the Disney movie. Great movie. I want to say,
Speaker 1: like Kimberly Johnson, Kimberly Joe Hann something like that. No idea,
Speaker 1: maybe like rend from Even Stevens. Did you see that
Speaker 1: they're bringing Even Stevens back? I swear to godoting so
Speaker 1: many TV shows. I don't know if Shyla the Buff
Speaker 1: is going to be back. Uh, dude, I had I
Speaker 1: had a crush on rent to it. I got crap
Speaker 1: for it. I had no idea why I think she's
Speaker 1: the cutest thing and Lizzie McGuire. Yeah, was there anybody
Speaker 1: else besides Taylor Hanson or Zack Zach Hanson? Excuse me?
Speaker 1: I actually had a crush on and I want to
Speaker 1: ask if she knows Alexander Petsy, who was an Olympic
Speaker 1: diver in Montreal, and I told him how to crush
Speaker 1: on him when I was like sixteen, that's pretty cool.
Speaker 1: Did he kne who you were? And now he no,
Speaker 1: he didn't know how it was back back, I was
Speaker 1: just like creeping him, like I was stalking him at
Speaker 1: the at the gym. Would have been such a surreal
Speaker 1: moment if you went up to a guy that you
Speaker 1: had a crush on one of your five and he
Speaker 1: was like, hey, you're Vanessa from the Batch. It did
Speaker 1: happen to me? What happened? Rick Fox? That's right, you've
Speaker 1: told the story before. Did you mean Kimberly Hard or
Speaker 1: Amy Joe Johnson? Amy Joe Johnson who was on Felicity. Yes?
Speaker 1: Can I see her face? She's gorgeous. I mean, Ashley
Speaker 1: is the one woman for me. But this was my first,
Speaker 1: one of my first questions. Disclaimer disclaimer, let's see very natural.
Speaker 1: I love that Amy Joe Johnson. Absolutely, that looks like
Speaker 1: a million dollar baby. Um oh my god, you can
Speaker 1: see young Jared you. It's bringing me back the Ninja Turtles.
Speaker 1: I mean, I know they weren't real, but I found
Speaker 1: the Ninja Turtles attractive. And Aladdin Grade one was Aladdin
Speaker 1: was my my, my biggest crush. I would sing a
Speaker 1: whole New world and try to get a bunch of
Speaker 1: guys to dat me. Jasmine was a very attractive cartoon.
Speaker 1: Question number five. Your favorite ice cream flavor vanilla with chocolates.
Speaker 1: That explains so nothing. It doesn't. You wouldn't even know.
Speaker 1: It doesn't. Nothing can encapsulate Vanessa more so than her
Speaker 1: favorite ice cream flavor vanilla. I'm surprises maybe with some
Speaker 1: chocolate chips in there now if she's to be the
Speaker 1: mini Chocolate Cubs though mint chocolate chip. Okay, that's a
Speaker 1: good one. Just a fun, loving, delicious guy. You know,
Speaker 1: delicious Dean. I'll go great with a hot summer's day.
Speaker 1: Throw me in a waffle cone or eat me out
Speaker 1: of a cup, it doesn't matter. I'm great. Mine is
Speaker 1: Hoggan Dos coffee. I'm a big coffee guy. Coffee is good.
Speaker 1: Number six, what was the first thing you noticed? What
Speaker 1: is the first thing that you noticed about the opposite sex? Smile? Okay,
Speaker 1: that was easy? What about you dared the first thing?
Speaker 1: But obviously no, I would say I as well, there's
Speaker 1: something about the aid A very captivating Number seven. What
Speaker 1: compliment do you get the most? What do you get
Speaker 1: complimented on most? I don't know you go first. I
Speaker 1: knew you were going to hate this question. That's why
Speaker 1: I wanted to ask, Dean is going to hate this?
Speaker 1: And I want you to answer my smile, but I
Speaker 1: don't get it. I hate my You have a great smile. Thanks,
Speaker 1: what's doing with you? Just it's my teeth that is
Speaker 1: not your smile. He's smiling like the Joaquin Phoenix did
Speaker 1: in the Joker trailer. Okay, smile to smile. Okay, my
Speaker 1: my jaw great jow Uh. We have GI on the phone. Wonderful. Okay,
Speaker 1: well we'll say for the last three then a little
Speaker 1: bit later. That sounds fine. I just don't want to
Speaker 1: keep her waiting. She's got laryngitis. I think she wants
Speaker 1: to be doing is kept on waiting. So here we go.
Speaker 1: We're gonna jump into a phone called with gorgeous g
Speaker 1: are you there? Hi? How are you hi? I'm good,
Speaker 1: I'm good, We're doing great. We're so we can't have
Speaker 1: you in personal I'm so sad. I flew in from Montreal.
Speaker 1: I was like, I can't wait to meet her. Oh
Speaker 1: my god, I'm so sorry. We understand you came down
Speaker 1: with all. We're like basically sisters. Well that's what I
Speaker 1: was gonna say. Are you were you born in Montreal
Speaker 1: and then I grew up in Toronto? Yeah? Um, I
Speaker 1: was born in Point Claire. I'm on the East End.
Speaker 1: I was born in St. Leonard. Okay, we heard small World,
Speaker 1: just a couple of Canadian gals. So that, Um, I'm
Speaker 1: such a huge fan. Actually, we're all a huge fan
Speaker 1: of yours. That help I second dating, Um, you have
Speaker 1: a new book that just came out right on April fourth,
Speaker 1: I believe. Yes, Yes, that's amazing. And how's that going.
Speaker 1: Can you give us a little background on what the
Speaker 1: book is about? Yeah? Well, I, um, I've always kind
Speaker 1: of wanted a book. I just never really thought that
Speaker 1: I'd be able to write one. So when I got you,
Speaker 1: opportunity and YouTube has given me so many of them
Speaker 1: in my life. So I was like Okay, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: write every single thing I've never talked about and share
Speaker 1: more than I ever have, and you just really really
Speaker 1: real and honest with it. So it literally is all
Speaker 1: of the lessons, mistakes, and um, you know, stories I
Speaker 1: have from my life, um, from ages five and down.
Speaker 1: So it came about kind of quickly, but it did
Speaker 1: take a long time for me to perfect it. It
Speaker 1: was probably two years that I was working on it,
Speaker 1: and it's the reception has been really, really really great
Speaker 1: so far. I did a signing in New York City
Speaker 1: and some people there had already actually read the book,
Speaker 1: so I was like, actually really shocked that people said
Speaker 1: through with that bath and they had really great things
Speaker 1: to say. So I'm feeling really proud and excited. What
Speaker 1: inspired you to write the book? Um? I mean, I
Speaker 1: honestly feel like just visibility and just telling your story
Speaker 1: is so important. And I've gotten a lot of feedback
Speaker 1: on like videos and stuff like that that um, you know,
Speaker 1: I've helped some people realize things about themselves or help
Speaker 1: them um their friends and hard situations or whatever. So
Speaker 1: I feel like me having this on like paper and
Speaker 1: just having it a tangible thing, my story, my truth
Speaker 1: for people just to hold and have forever. I think
Speaker 1: that stands the test of time. And that's what I
Speaker 1: wanted to achieve. Is that is that terrifying to write
Speaker 1: that all down and to publish it for everyone in
Speaker 1: the world to read it is? It is? And when
Speaker 1: I tell you that, I went through it like a
Speaker 1: good twenty five times, like front cover to cover, I
Speaker 1: would like, they're abouter, not be one selling mistake, one
Speaker 1: fact that's not true, one photo on the wrong page.
Speaker 1: I was like a stickler and um, yeah, I had
Speaker 1: to make sure everything was perfect. So I I guess
Speaker 1: I want to know, is there a chapter in the
Speaker 1: book because you talk about how your mom passed away
Speaker 1: and you're I mean, you have such a great relationship
Speaker 1: with your brothers and UM. In the documentary as well,
Speaker 1: your dad was so supportive of you and you come
Speaker 1: from I mean, you come from an Italian and of
Speaker 1: in his background, which I I know how like my
Speaker 1: Italian family is and they're very strict when it comes
Speaker 1: to um, you know, just the culture. It was so
Speaker 1: amazing and it was so touching to see how your
Speaker 1: dad supported you throughout everything. UM. Do you go through
Speaker 1: a little bit more in a chapter in your book
Speaker 1: with that story. Yes, Oh my goodness, my family is
Speaker 1: a big part of it. My family was a big
Speaker 1: part of the movie. But to talk about your first
Speaker 1: the first part of what you said, I have never
Speaker 1: really truly opened up about my mom um the way
Speaker 1: that I do in the book, and it was one
Speaker 1: of the most terrifying things I've ever done, having to
Speaker 1: relive that and also having to write it down, really
Speaker 1: dive deep in what I feel, and just choosing what
Speaker 1: to say because for a long time I was completely
Speaker 1: speechless to the whole thing, you know, So me just
Speaker 1: picking my words wisely, not leaving anything out, and then
Speaker 1: just being ready just to be free and that put
Speaker 1: it that. It feels, honestly so free to have that
Speaker 1: out there. And I think that she would be really
Speaker 1: happy with how she's portrayed. I mean she was. She
Speaker 1: literally is the world's best mom, and I was so lucky.
Speaker 1: So I just, um, I wanted to do her justice,
Speaker 1: and um, yeah, I just feel great about that chapter.
Speaker 1: But it's like doing the audio book, it was not easy.
Speaker 1: I was choking up, I had to take breaks, I
Speaker 1: was crying. It's like, that's probably the hardest one for
Speaker 1: me in there. Well, correct me if I'm wrong, But
Speaker 1: it was the passing of your mother that inspired you
Speaker 1: to transition, right, yeah, it was. Well, I had met
Speaker 1: this girl in New York, um, and she really helped
Speaker 1: me decide to transition because it was my first kind
Speaker 1: of real life and like example of someone who was
Speaker 1: trans like right in front of my face. So that
Speaker 1: was kind of the deciding factor. But my mom was
Speaker 1: like the one where I was like, Okay, you know,
Speaker 1: you got to live every day, look at your last
Speaker 1: and you really have to just live in the moment
Speaker 1: and feeling these things inside. So I'm just gonna go
Speaker 1: for it because clearly I was just shown this humongous
Speaker 1: change in my life and I can't take anything for grant.
Speaker 1: I can't take any minute for granted now and there's
Speaker 1: no time like the present. Um. I have a question
Speaker 1: with this being a dating podcast, what is dating like
Speaker 1: for you? But do you have a significant others? You
Speaker 1: are engaged? Yes, I'm engaged. Dating was it was very
Speaker 1: very tricky, you know, I feel like for trans girls,
Speaker 1: I mean, dating is hard regardless. I'm sure you guys
Speaker 1: talked about this every single day, but um, yeah, dating
Speaker 1: for trans girls is hard. There's a lot of rejection,
Speaker 1: there's a lot of fear, and there's a lot of
Speaker 1: insecurity and self doubt because I think, well, I know,
Speaker 1: for me, I'm a long time I was, but I
Speaker 1: was trying to be something I totally wasn't, you know.
Speaker 1: And now that I'm engaged to the love of my life,
Speaker 1: I can be me. I don't think I'll thank you. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't have to put on a facade with mats like.
Speaker 1: I just feel like I can be me and I
Speaker 1: don't have to be this hyper feminine version of myself
Speaker 1: and always speak correctly and watch what I say, you know,
Speaker 1: And like, I've been in relationships before, which is in
Speaker 1: the book where they were awful and made me feel
Speaker 1: less then and nobody deserves that. Well, we've all been
Speaker 1: through relationships like that, so I'm sure we can all
Speaker 1: relate to that. And I love also on your YouTube channels,
Speaker 1: you you just openly talk about I mean, at one
Speaker 1: point you were like taking off your makeup and you're
Speaker 1: being so vulnerable in front of the camera and you
Speaker 1: were talking about like self confidence. And I actually get
Speaker 1: a lot of questions and people think that I have
Speaker 1: so much self confidence and I'm like, oh, yeah, I
Speaker 1: mean on some days, on good days, I do. But
Speaker 1: on other days I'm the most insecure person ever. So
Speaker 1: how did you build that self confidence to start this
Speaker 1: YouTube channel and have millions of followers follow your journey
Speaker 1: and now have a book and really be vulnerable and
Speaker 1: open up to all these people. Well, at the beginning,
Speaker 1: it was like just definitely a leap of faith. I
Speaker 1: didn't know what I was doing. I definitely wasn't that confident,
Speaker 1: and I feel like for the most part, I just
Speaker 1: faked it until I made it kind of and I
Speaker 1: was a teaming jor I didn't really you know, know,
Speaker 1: who I was. I was just really experimenting. And I
Speaker 1: feel the way I stay confident, like you said, was
Speaker 1: I honestly really just try to look at the positive
Speaker 1: in every situation. Like like going back to dating, I
Speaker 1: feel like trans girls think, oh, it's so hard because
Speaker 1: there are not a lot of people out there that
Speaker 1: want to date a trans girl, and people that do
Speaker 1: it might be a little bit of a fetish for
Speaker 1: them and that's not what I want. But I think
Speaker 1: the positive side of that could be that the world
Speaker 1: everyone else who's like that, you know, a heterosexual. Um,
Speaker 1: person in the world has billions and billions of people
Speaker 1: to choose from, but these people, but trans people, have
Speaker 1: that ratio lowered for them. So the chances of finding
Speaker 1: the one are that much better. That's I mean, that's
Speaker 1: a good way of looking at It's a very optimistic view.
Speaker 1: So for the listeners out there that maybe you're struggling
Speaker 1: with the same thing do, what kind of advice would
Speaker 1: you have for them, um, I mean struggling with finding
Speaker 1: the one? Are confident? Well, just like just like you said,
Speaker 1: dating is hard for anyone, but especially you know, for
Speaker 1: anyone that's transitioned, it's it's even more difficult, right, So
Speaker 1: so for someone that's listening that might be struggling with that,
Speaker 1: what kind of advice would you have for them that
Speaker 1: that you learned and I'm sure you outline in your
Speaker 1: book of course, but um, that that they might be
Speaker 1: able to apply right away to help boost your confidence,
Speaker 1: help them meet someone that kind of thing. Yeah, you know,
Speaker 1: I well I personally, whenever I was looking for something, um,
Speaker 1: it never really happened. I was kind of like a
Speaker 1: fun romantic girl. It was never really that serious. And
Speaker 1: then I had one serious relationship and after that one,
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm done. I think I'm done for
Speaker 1: a minute, and then I met Nats. So I would say,
Speaker 1: you gotta love yourself first. You gotta not fill out
Speaker 1: there and look for it kind of happens when you're
Speaker 1: at least expecting it. I feel like I've heard that
Speaker 1: so much, but it's so true for me because I
Speaker 1: had no idea that I was gonna fall in love. Um,
Speaker 1: and yeah, I mean I feel like transitioning, there's a
Speaker 1: lot of it's just a journey, you know, So maybe
Speaker 1: just love yourself first, because that's the most important thing. Chees. No,
Speaker 1: it's great, but it's true. How long have you and
Speaker 1: that been together? Now? Like three years? Right? We have
Speaker 1: been together for three years. We've been engaged for one. Oh.
Speaker 1: So do you know when you're gonna get married? We do.
Speaker 1: Can you give us a You don't have to say
Speaker 1: the exact date, obviously, tell us exactly where and when
Speaker 1: and if our invitations are in the mail? Right. No,
Speaker 1: we're getting married, um later this year, but um, we
Speaker 1: are keeping everything super private. Now come on, well that's great.
Speaker 1: Now you're not going to say, come on, I'll expect
Speaker 1: I'll expect my invite privately. You've got my email address,
Speaker 1: you can send it over there. Perfect. I'm getting married
Speaker 1: later this year as well, so teen a good year
Speaker 1: to get married. Congratulations, thank you. Will August we've been
Speaker 1: saying August, we're not saying the date, but in August
Speaker 1: fun our wedding. Yes, late summer wedding over on the
Speaker 1: East coast. So we're very excited. Um, and then that's amazing.
Speaker 1: Congrat Thanks you too, Know g G, I had a
Speaker 1: question because I was you had. You've been very open
Speaker 1: about everything in your life, which we all give you
Speaker 1: a lot of credit here and help my second dating.
Speaker 1: My question is you were originally dating men? Correct? Before
Speaker 1: you you decided that you were attracted to women. Um?
Speaker 1: Now were you dating men after you had the procedure done? Um? Yes,
Speaker 1: I was. I was only really dating men. But I
Speaker 1: talked about this a lot in the book. I feel
Speaker 1: like it's more of like a like a social construct
Speaker 1: that I honestly felt like was just like I guess,
Speaker 1: like brainwashed into me. I don't know, it's it's like
Speaker 1: this weird thing for me because I never really, ever, ever,
Speaker 1: ever my wildest dreams, saw myself with a woman, but
Speaker 1: it just ended up happening that way because I just
Speaker 1: really stayed authentic with myself and allowed myself to keep
Speaker 1: growing and like question what I was feeling, which I
Speaker 1: think is a really healthy thing to do, even though
Speaker 1: it's like a little bit scary. And it was definitely
Speaker 1: a hard time for me because I was like, what
Speaker 1: is happening in my brain? Like it's like this is
Speaker 1: something I never really thought would happen, but um, yeah,
Speaker 1: that is that's me and this is my authentic self.
Speaker 1: And I was screaming it loud and proud and this stuff. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you love who you love. And then I'm sure you
Speaker 1: elaborate more on this in the book, but do you
Speaker 1: kind of remember when you first started realizing you might
Speaker 1: have been born the wrong sex? Yeah, when I was born,
Speaker 1: I definitely felt that there was something different. I didn't
Speaker 1: know how to put my finger on it. But I
Speaker 1: feel like when I was like when in my teenage years, um,
Speaker 1: I kind of put that at the side. I kind
Speaker 1: of focused on other things. I was a diver. I
Speaker 1: was on my way to the Olympics, so I was
Speaker 1: basically an athlete first, and then after I stopped diving,
Speaker 1: I had like time to think about it and feel
Speaker 1: differently about it. So that's kind of when I got
Speaker 1: in back into it and started revisiting how I was
Speaker 1: really feeling, because it was like, Okay, these thoughts are
Speaker 1: still here, They're not going anywhere. Yeah. I mean, it's
Speaker 1: pretty incredible to see your journey and see how you've
Speaker 1: been able to be your authentic self and really, um,
Speaker 1: love yourself first, yeah, and be true, be true to yourself.
Speaker 1: A lot of people can't say that, and it's sad,
Speaker 1: and it's really inspiring to see someone who's unapologetically themselves
Speaker 1: and continue to love themselves for who they are. You're
Speaker 1: going on, yeah, yeah, Yeah. I actually have the the
Speaker 1: l A stop tonight and then we're going back to
Speaker 1: New York, which is not good for my cold right now,
Speaker 1: but vitamin C and powering through with the glands. I
Speaker 1: don't know what it is, but I have a cold too.
Speaker 1: I think that there's something going around going around the area. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I never ever get set, and it's like hitting me
Speaker 1: so hard. I'm like, can I just be normal again? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Monday I had it was a very hard struggle to
Speaker 1: get out of bed Monday morning. But I'm on the tail.
Speaker 1: And I landed in New York earlier this week and
Speaker 1: I called an I v into my room because I
Speaker 1: felt like I was dying. You gotta get that I
Speaker 1: v in there. I was like, I need all my
Speaker 1: nutrients and fluid. Yeah, g you're about to go on tour.
Speaker 1: You need to be ready to go. Um. Well, thank
Speaker 1: you so much for joining us. You can get g
Speaker 1: gorgeous book, he said, She said, lesson stories and mistakes
Speaker 1: from my Chance transgender journey. You can get down Amazon,
Speaker 1: or you can go to gi Gorgeous book dot com
Speaker 1: and purchase it right there, Gigi, anything else you want
Speaker 1: to talk about for a second, or where can people
Speaker 1: find you? People can find me everywhere across all social media.
Speaker 1: I'm just g g Gorgett on everywhere except Twitter. I
Speaker 1: am v Gorgets. I just wanted to thank you guys
Speaker 1: for having me. Congratulations on all of your success. Oh,
Speaker 1: thank you map you feel better, g G. Before you
Speaker 1: take off, I just need a promise for me that
Speaker 1: next time we're gonna get you in studio and set
Speaker 1: over the phone. Okay, wonderful, Thank you so much. I
Speaker 1: feel better. Okay, thank you bye. That was great. I'm
Speaker 1: so sad she wasn't. She's fascinating. Yeah, I really wish
Speaker 1: she was in studio. Yeah, I love hearing stories like that. Well,
Speaker 1: I just her entire life. I was looking her up
Speaker 1: and how she was born a swimmer and athlete, and
Speaker 1: then she was Yeah, she saw the videos of her diving.
Speaker 1: I haven't seen the videos, but she has. I see
Speaker 1: a picture of her as a boy, and she has
Speaker 1: many medals around her neck. Um. And then I saw
Speaker 1: that she was originally attracted to men, uh, and then
Speaker 1: still dating men when she uh became a transgender woman
Speaker 1: and then started dating women. UM. So it's pretty fascinating,
Speaker 1: pretty fascinating. I always get nervous though, sometimes because I
Speaker 1: never want to get the vernacular wrong. For example, I
Speaker 1: never want to get the vernacular wrong. I never want
Speaker 1: to mispronounce anything because it's you know, sensitive time, and
Speaker 1: I want to make sure that I'm being sensitive to everybody.
Speaker 1: And so for a good example, I wish I asked
Speaker 1: her on the podcast. But like she said, she was
Speaker 1: attracted to men, and so I'm curious if she was
Speaker 1: a game in before and then became a transgender lesbian.
Speaker 1: I don't know if she becomes a well she was
Speaker 1: attracted de mend I don't know. I don't know what
Speaker 1: how you described that I should ask her. I wasn't
Speaker 1: even thinking, but maybe it's in the book. So check
Speaker 1: out the book. There you go, probably one of the
Speaker 1: chapters of the gotta read the book. So we went
Speaker 1: over some of these when you guys weren't in studio
Speaker 1: and Mikhaela from Bachelor Canada was came in and she
Speaker 1: just moved to Montreal. She's dating someone from Monstrelle. Excited
Speaker 1: to have her in my hometown. But I had posted
Speaker 1: a picture of dany babies and I, yeah, I remember
Speaker 1: when we were at the I Heart Radio Podcast Awards.
Speaker 1: I posted a picture of us and I was I
Speaker 1: basically asked asked people to write in some of their
Speaker 1: dating questions, and I got so many people sending me
Speaker 1: d m s just commenting on um on the picture.
Speaker 1: So we went through some of them, but there's so
Speaker 1: many other great one that I wanted to go over.
Speaker 1: So Margie asks, what is the chase quote unquote all about?
Speaker 1: Is it necessary for the guy to go after the
Speaker 1: girl or do they really think it's a desperate move
Speaker 1: if the girl goes for the guy Venice. Want you
Speaker 1: answer this first or is it more of a confidence thing? Um?
Speaker 1: I really do think at the beginning stages when you're
Speaker 1: dating someone, there has to be a little bit of
Speaker 1: a push and pull for the guy if it gets
Speaker 1: especially for like, if I'm like such a hopeless romantic,
Speaker 1: So for guy that I know I'm attracted to gives
Speaker 1: me attention, I'll be like, let's get married to tomorrow.
Speaker 1: But if I do that to the guy, he's gonna
Speaker 1: be like, you're and I don't want to date you.
Speaker 1: So I think you have to. I'm someone if I
Speaker 1: find someone attractive, most of the guys that I have dated,
Speaker 1: it's because I either slid into their d m s
Speaker 1: or I approached them in person first. So I think
Speaker 1: guys do like a sense of confidence. I think you're
Speaker 1: overly too confident. It might be intimidating for them because
Speaker 1: you know, apparently its supposed to be the guy that
Speaker 1: goes after the girl. But well, if anybody's overly confident,
Speaker 1: it's turn off because that's cockiness, right right. Um, But
Speaker 1: I think guys do like the chase. You're you're hunters.
Speaker 1: You want to, you know, go for things that are
Speaker 1: a little bit right that are a little bit do
Speaker 1: you know? You don't know? I agree, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I have such mixed seriens about this. I like because
Speaker 1: I'm so blase about basically everything in my life, where
Speaker 1: it's like, yeah, like if we, if we, I don't know,
Speaker 1: Like if you chase me cool, if I chase you
Speaker 1: cool either way. Yeah, But I think for h now,
Speaker 1: obviously we're putting a vague blanket on everybody. But I
Speaker 1: do think a lot of guys do like the chase.
Speaker 1: They want what they can have. I feel like a
Speaker 1: lot of people feel like that. Yeah, and then you
Speaker 1: get it and then you're like, okay, yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 1: There's this one quote from Batman movie Batman. I'm already
Speaker 1: gonna love it. Begin Joker. What's the one with Christian
Speaker 1: Bale and Heath Ledger as a Joker, The Doc Knight
Speaker 1: The Doc Knight. Yes, Um, there's a quote that the
Speaker 1: Joker says. He says, I'm just the dog chasing cars.
Speaker 1: I don't know what I would do if I ever
Speaker 1: caught one. Yeah, And I feel guys are very much
Speaker 1: the same way. They're just dogs chasing cars exactly. And
Speaker 1: it's not until they're actually read. I was talking to
Speaker 1: a guy about cars and dogs. You guys are like
Speaker 1: you guys are like you know Bentley's Well, we're not
Speaker 1: trying to objectify anyone here, but the point is it's like,
Speaker 1: you guys are like Mercedes Benz. We're all we're all
Speaker 1: seeking something, but once we actually find it, we don't
Speaker 1: know what to actually do with it. It's kind of
Speaker 1: the point of that, you know. It's like saying people
Speaker 1: are scared of success, which I agree with because it's like,
Speaker 1: once you you always want to chase something, but once
Speaker 1: you actually get it, then you have to hold onto it,
Speaker 1: and that's what becomes the difficult part. Yeah. I think
Speaker 1: most of my relationships were ended up becoming so empty
Speaker 1: because the guy ended up getting me and then he's like, oh, well,
Speaker 1: now I have her, what do I do with her next?
Speaker 1: Until now the guy that I'm dating is like, Wow,
Speaker 1: I have her and I really don't want to lose her.
Speaker 1: Well that's very sweet. Yeah. Um, Sarah says, how do
Speaker 1: I get a guy to want to have a relationship
Speaker 1: with me and not just a hook up? I think
Speaker 1: it's something that a lot of women ask themselves, like
Speaker 1: how if we give it up too easily, and not
Speaker 1: even I shouldn't even say that, because it's our bodies.
Speaker 1: So if we want to give it up on date
Speaker 1: one day, two day, three, day, four, day five, whenever,
Speaker 1: it is on us, right, well, that's on us. And
Speaker 1: that's like because we we we own our body, so
Speaker 1: we're allowed to do whatever we want with it. But
Speaker 1: what does a guy think of that? If you do
Speaker 1: end up hooking up with them in the early stages.
Speaker 1: I don't think it's that big. I don't think it's
Speaker 1: that big of a deal. I think that the physical
Speaker 1: part of a relationship is such a key component that
Speaker 1: in order to figure out if there's going to be
Speaker 1: chemistry there early on, it can it's It's not a
Speaker 1: bad thing immediately, I don't think so. You know, yeah,
Speaker 1: but sex does change the relationship, I mean for the better, yes,
Speaker 1: but it also does change it. I don't think there's
Speaker 1: also anything But here is the thing. I don't think
Speaker 1: there's anything wrong with waiting a couple of days in
Speaker 1: building up that anticipation and trying to learn about somebody,
Speaker 1: uh before you commit physically to them. And I'm exactly
Speaker 1: I fully agree with that as well. But the counterpoint
Speaker 1: can be made that your future relationship will have two sides, right,
Speaker 1: It'll have an emotional side and then I'll have the
Speaker 1: physical side of if you, if you. I don't think
Speaker 1: it's necessarily the worst thing to explore the physical side
Speaker 1: early on to ensure that there's gonna be longevity in
Speaker 1: the relationship, because you want to be able to both
Speaker 1: experience the emotional and physical side rate extent. I think
Speaker 1: what ends up happening is girls are stuck in the
Speaker 1: like between a rock and a hard place, because if
Speaker 1: you ask the guy like, hey, well, are you looking
Speaker 1: for something serious? The guy is probably gonna be like, well,
Speaker 1: let me just pretend as if I am, so that
Speaker 1: I can keep going on a day with her. And
Speaker 1: then she's like, oh, well, I think he says you
Speaker 1: might want to be into something serious, so let me
Speaker 1: just hook up with him, because like, oh, I'm attracted
Speaker 1: to him. And then once that happens, it's like, oh, well, no,
Speaker 1: that's not what I wanted because I have been in
Speaker 1: situations like that. Well, yeah, a lot of guys will
Speaker 1: say whatever they have to sa in order to get
Speaker 1: into the sack if you will, So Sarah, I don't
Speaker 1: know that's a tough one. I mean, honestly, it's just
Speaker 1: about finding the right guy, you know, That's what it
Speaker 1: really comes down to. You're gonna find guys like whether
Speaker 1: you're a girl trying to date a guy, a guy
Speaker 1: trying to date a girl, a guy trying to date
Speaker 1: a guy, or a girl trying to date a girl.
Speaker 1: You're gonna find and meet people and go on dates
Speaker 1: with people that just want to have sex with you
Speaker 1: or want to date you. You're gonna find different people
Speaker 1: of all different backgrounds who want different things in their life.
Speaker 1: It's all about just finding them with you. Then that
Speaker 1: means you're attractive, so that's like sumbs up. Then it's
Speaker 1: up to you whether you want to do it or not.
Speaker 1: And I think as an individual, you're gonna want different
Speaker 1: things in life to your things are gonna go on
Speaker 1: where you're like, Okay, I just want to jump this
Speaker 1: guy's bones, and there's other days you're gonna go and
Speaker 1: we're like, Okay, I want to get to know this
Speaker 1: guy first. So I think it's also dependent on this situation,
Speaker 1: the time, the person, the other person, all these things. Um,
Speaker 1: if you're going to have sex, just wear a condom.
Speaker 1: That's all. I said, Absolutely, and get checked, get checked
Speaker 1: every three months, six months, while moving on three every week,
Speaker 1: every every six months. Absolutely, I hold on. I remember
Speaker 1: last year, Dean, I was sitting you in that in
Speaker 1: the room where I was sitting, like I said, sitting
Speaker 1: on him. I was. I was sitting in the room
Speaker 1: on those red chairs with you, and I said, why
Speaker 1: is it that I can't find a guy? And you're
Speaker 1: like Vanessa, You're just too You're just you're too intense.
Speaker 1: You are intense. What does that mean? I just I
Speaker 1: was just saying earlier how blase I am about everything.
Speaker 1: So for someone like me that doesn't take anything seriously,
Speaker 1: you can be kind of intense. You come off intense
Speaker 1: because you you are very vocal about There's nothing wrong
Speaker 1: with that, there's nothing wrong with that at all, but
Speaker 1: it is intimidating for someone like a someone that doesn't
Speaker 1: know what he wants dating or is it a turn off?
Speaker 1: It's a turn off, Well, it depends what you mean
Speaker 1: by turn off. I wasn't physically turned off, but emotionally
Speaker 1: I was like I probably couldn't handle her in a
Speaker 1: relationship if that, if it ever got that to that point,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. Right, So there is a
Speaker 1: game that women have to play well and too. But
Speaker 1: here's the thing. You would never have wanted a relationship
Speaker 1: between you and I to work out because and it
Speaker 1: shouldn't have worked out because obviously, like it just wouldn't Exactly,
Speaker 1: it's not it's not a game. They have to play it.
Speaker 1: But like, no, no, no, I'm not saying between you
Speaker 1: and I. I'm just saying what in general, saying the
Speaker 1: fact I don't have to play a game. It's just
Speaker 1: all about finding the right person. Yet again, because if
Speaker 1: you if you vocalize what you want and you say
Speaker 1: the things that you want to achieve in life, and
Speaker 1: then a guy's like, I don't want that, then that's
Speaker 1: obviously not somebody you want to be with. Compared to
Speaker 1: if you say your opinions and it's somebody and the
Speaker 1: guy says, hey, those are the things I want as well,
Speaker 1: then boom, you have some sort of connection that you
Speaker 1: can move forward with. Mark, he stood up for this.
Speaker 1: I was just enjoying the tension those buildings, the sexual tension.
Speaker 1: It was very exciting. It's you got nobody really you know,
Speaker 1: you're a lot for Dean, but it seems to me
Speaker 1: that all women are a lot for Dean. That's what it.
Speaker 1: Come on, I'm right here, I just yeah, no, I
Speaker 1: mean much not wrong anyway, let's go, let's move on
Speaker 1: to the next. All right, there's another writer and I'm
Speaker 1: not sure from pronouncing her name right, And I don't
Speaker 1: know if there's a C missing Nicole or Nie Hole.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go with Nicole. But Nicole, I can't find
Speaker 1: it now. So Nicole, I think, is married. Let me
Speaker 1: find it. Oh, yes, I'm married, but I sometimes feel
Speaker 1: like I'm not enough for my husband. We have two
Speaker 1: kids together, we both work full time, so the intimate
Speaker 1: moments are rare. How can I change this? Well, actually, Mark,
Speaker 1: you're the married man here. Yeah, And it's a challenge.
Speaker 1: It really is a difficult thing. Plus, if you have
Speaker 1: a kid that has anxiety and comes into your room
Speaker 1: at all hours of the night, it's very Uh, it's
Speaker 1: very difficult to make it work. You just got to
Speaker 1: be committed to trying to make it work and understanding
Speaker 1: each of your needs. How often does this because you
Speaker 1: don't want it? Because the distance is created if too
Speaker 1: much time passes. But intimacy and we had a guest
Speaker 1: come in once and we were talking about intimacy doesn't
Speaker 1: necessarily mean having to have sitting on each other's lap
Speaker 1: or like giving each other a hug or cooking for
Speaker 1: each other. That is a form of intimacy as well,
Speaker 1: where you can build on the relationship. That's a great
Speaker 1: point because if if I can, I can feel it.
Speaker 1: If we go a day and there's no physical contact
Speaker 1: between it because they're just running all over the place,
Speaker 1: taking the kids every place, you really start to feel
Speaker 1: that distance between you. So you just have to make
Speaker 1: the commitment to both of you and then you've got
Speaker 1: to make a commitment for a little get away every
Speaker 1: once in a while, and that really kind of gets
Speaker 1: the fires going again. Yeah, what about couples therapy. I
Speaker 1: we've never done a couple of therapy. I'm all for yeah,
Speaker 1: but we talk about therapy a lot on this as
Speaker 1: we well should. But I also think that there are
Speaker 1: other avenues besides a couple of therapy, like you said,
Speaker 1: like a getaway that can really spark the fire again.
Speaker 1: It's something that's really nice because yeah, I think people
Speaker 1: think couple when you think of the word therapy, it's
Speaker 1: like there's something wrong with you, there's something that needs
Speaker 1: to be fixed, right, and it shouldn't. And I'm so
Speaker 1: a gense, Like I hate when people think like that,
Speaker 1: if you're going to the gym, you're going to the
Speaker 1: gym to work your body out, So why not go
Speaker 1: to a therapist to work your brain out. Yeah, but
Speaker 1: there's different moves at the gym that you can do.
Speaker 1: You could do bench, you could do back different you
Speaker 1: could literally go to your therapist and just talk about
Speaker 1: how you want grocery shopping today and be like, well,
Speaker 1: there's nothing really I need to like totally an hour
Speaker 1: to the bank. I just don't think therapy is mandated.
Speaker 1: I think it's if you want to keep like continue
Speaker 1: to grow and you think you guys need it absolutely,
Speaker 1: But I also think that like there are different methods
Speaker 1: as well, therapy is not a last resort. But I
Speaker 1: also don't think it's like, hey, we should do this weekly.
Speaker 1: I mean depends on whatever you want. Um, Like, if
Speaker 1: you want to do therapy every week, of course that's
Speaker 1: between you and your significant other. But I think my
Speaker 1: point is like I don't want people to think that like, hey,
Speaker 1: nothing's wrong, we should go to therapy. It's like No,
Speaker 1: you can do other things as well. There's a multitude
Speaker 1: of things that you can do to help the relationship grow.
Speaker 1: I don't know, that's just my opinion. No, I agree
Speaker 1: that sometimes people don't know what it is that they
Speaker 1: should be doing because they're like, well, we think we've
Speaker 1: tried everything, How can we how can we get there?
Speaker 1: Well that would that's different because then they see couples
Speaker 1: therapy as the last resort. Uch. Again, it's not, it's not,
Speaker 1: and we're usually when it is a last resort, the
Speaker 1: relationship is probably going to end. That's what my therapist says.
Speaker 1: All right, let's just wrap up these Uh they're not
Speaker 1: even questions anymore that I had, But let's wrap this
Speaker 1: up and then we'll wrap up the podcast. Sound pretty
Speaker 1: good moving forward? Oh, it's all right. I think we
Speaker 1: don't want you to leave. No, no, just stay, stay
Speaker 1: for a nextra week record another one. Um, all right,
Speaker 1: well this is more like we talked about a couple
Speaker 1: of weeks ago, how we wanted to introduce new dating
Speaker 1: terms to the podcast to make sure everybody was on
Speaker 1: the same level playing field. So I have two new ones,
Speaker 1: and I like to know Dean and Vanessa Dean, get
Speaker 1: off your phone. Everybody's on the phone computer right now
Speaker 1: except for me. This is ridiculous. I'm the only one
Speaker 1: paying attention to your computer is literally right wide open
Speaker 1: right now. But I'm not on your on your Bluetooth speaker.
Speaker 1: And now with with Ashley, who are you? What are
Speaker 1: you saying? That is not true? Make sure you get
Speaker 1: the coffee that I like, Ashley? Um and all right,
Speaker 1: number right? So two more terms to know for dating?
Speaker 1: Do you guys know what love bombing is? We talked
Speaker 1: about this on the two weeks we didn't We did
Speaker 1: not talk about with the Bubbies. It shows so much attention.
Speaker 1: So what is it when you're when you overly expressed
Speaker 1: too much um infatuation with someone and then you pull back,
Speaker 1: and then you do it again, and you pull back
Speaker 1: and you do it again. We had the Bubbies on
Speaker 1: literally two weeks ago. All right, number nine, I don't
Speaker 1: have a good memory. What do you know what fired
Speaker 1: dooring is? Fire dooring? Fire like a fire door door,
Speaker 1: fire dooring? Yeah? Well, I think it's when you get
Speaker 1: freaked out by someone. You're like, google it. Dean, you
Speaker 1: don't cheat? Good god, he's such a cheater. If it
Speaker 1: has to continue. No, No, am I right? Like when
Speaker 1: you like, when you get freaked out by someone, you're
Speaker 1: like but and you're like, just take the exit door,
Speaker 1: like I think. I think if I were to guess,
Speaker 1: it's when there is a relationship, I'm just getting the email.
Speaker 1: Google's right open on your computer. It's Uh. If I
Speaker 1: had a guess, it's probably when there's a relationship and
Speaker 1: one person is showing a lot more interest in the
Speaker 1: relationship than the other person. It's just a one way
Speaker 1: street essentially. Yes, it's a person who has all the
Speaker 1: power uh in an exchange. Someone who will text you
Speaker 1: but fail to respond when you text back. Someone you
Speaker 1: will never make plans to see, but expect to be
Speaker 1: expecting to drop everything and come out when they happen
Speaker 1: to have an afternoon free Sounds like a boy Yeah,
Speaker 1: so it just says, for example, Dean Angler, all right,
Speaker 1: number ten the last one? Because I was listening to
Speaker 1: Backstreet Boys. What's your favorite boy brand of all time?
Speaker 1: Handsome brothers? No need to boy bands? You should have
Speaker 1: been in one? Are you googling boy bands? No? I was,
Speaker 1: so I got sent this, uh this fifteen signs are
Speaker 1: getting a douche Bag list and I was like, on
Speaker 1: the cover of it, no way. So we were just
Speaker 1: talking about how you're The website was a because you're
Speaker 1: so good looking, people probably think you're a douchebag. No,
Speaker 1: it was it was like ten reasons you're dating. Uh wait,
Speaker 1: I think this is me stupid Paradise a major Oh gotcha?
Speaker 1: Okay is your picture seriously on that? It was I
Speaker 1: don't know. My friend said to me, thank you guys
Speaker 1: at all, and that's why you need to go to
Speaker 1: Paradise redeem yourself. I don't give a I don't give
Speaker 1: a crap about a redemption story. I care about it.
Speaker 1: You deserve better. Dean Buddy um favorite boy band I
Speaker 1: guess end sync Backstreet Boyer Guy. Um. Anyways, thank you
Speaker 1: guys so much for Thank you Vanessa for being studio today,
Speaker 1: just for this and for the wine tour, literally just
Speaker 1: for this, just to see Jared and me um and
Speaker 1: hang out with us and talk to on the phone.
Speaker 1: Big thank you to Gi Gorgeous. Of course, Jared, where
Speaker 1: can we find her book? So you can go to
Speaker 1: Gigi gorgeous book dot com where you can purchase her
Speaker 1: brand new book. He said. She said lesson stories and
Speaker 1: mistakes from my transgender journey. It's also on Amazon so
Speaker 1: you can purchase it there. Big thank you to all
Speaker 1: our sponsors for this week's episode. We wouldn't be here
Speaker 1: with that you guys. Big thank you to Easton, Tory
Speaker 1: and Mark for being the best producers in the world.
Speaker 1: Big thank you to our listeners for listening to this
Speaker 1: podcast always the biggest thank you. Guys. Can join the
Speaker 1: Facebook group help By Suck a Dating Podcast, and you
Speaker 1: can also follow us on Instagram where Dean help I
Speaker 1: Suck a Day, Help I Suck a Dating? Or Deny
Speaker 1: Underscore Babies or Jared Habon or Vanessa Grimaldi nine one um,
Speaker 1: that'll do it for this week's episode of Help I
Speaker 1: Suck At Dating. Thank you for tuning in. Be sure
Speaker 1: tune in next week where maybe we'll suck a little
Speaker 1: bit less. Follow help By Suck At Dating with Dean,
Speaker 1: Vanessa and Jared on I Heart Radio or wherever you
Speaker 1: listen to podcast