WEBVTT - Janelle Monáe On Bodily Autonomy, Non-Binary Identity, The Age Of Pleasure + More 0:00:00.880 --> 0:00:03.280 I'm still on LA time. It's so difficult for me. 0:00:05.800 --> 0:00:08.080 Here we go morning. 0:00:08.119 --> 0:00:11.399 Everybody is DJ Envy, Charlamagne, the Guy. We are the 0:00:11.440 --> 0:00:13.880 breakfast club. We got a special guest in the building, 0:00:13.960 --> 0:00:15.840 the goddess Janelle Monnet. 0:00:16.280 --> 0:00:17.720 Hi, welcome. 0:00:17.960 --> 0:00:18.320 Hello. 0:00:18.560 --> 0:00:20.639 The first thing you said is this is the Age 0:00:20.840 --> 0:00:21.520 of Pleasure. 0:00:21.560 --> 0:00:22.360 How's she doing first? 0:00:22.360 --> 0:00:25.440 But that's the first thing she said, How are you listen? 0:00:25.840 --> 0:00:31.520 Phenomenal? I'm so excited. Album comes out tomorrow today today. 0:00:31.760 --> 0:00:35.440 Oh wait, album comes out to day. Here you go 0:00:35.960 --> 0:00:39.159 like this is I have been waiting, waiting, waiting. I've 0:00:39.159 --> 0:00:41.839 been living with this record, living with this soundtrack to 0:00:42.360 --> 0:00:46.199 my lifestyle, and to finally have it out, it just 0:00:46.240 --> 0:00:49.199 means it's like I'm excited. I'm super excited. 0:00:49.600 --> 0:00:50.600 The Age of pleasure. 0:00:50.760 --> 0:00:52.280 Yes, that's what we're in babies. 0:00:52.360 --> 0:00:54.240 So why did you call it the Age of pleasure? 0:00:54.600 --> 0:00:57.760 Well, you know, I've had my age of anxiety. I've 0:00:57.800 --> 0:01:02.360 had my age of depression, I had my age of confusion, 0:01:03.960 --> 0:01:08.280 of imbalance, and you know, just realizing that we'll never 0:01:08.360 --> 0:01:11.679 live in a world where you know, something heavy won't 0:01:11.680 --> 0:01:14.440 be happening. You know, always problems will have to solve 0:01:14.480 --> 0:01:16.679 and even in the midst of that, you have to 0:01:16.720 --> 0:01:19.800 find your joy. You have to actively find your pleasure. 0:01:19.840 --> 0:01:22.200 And in the words of Maurice's White from Earth, Wind 0:01:22.240 --> 0:01:24.919 and Fire, if there ain't no beauty, make some beauty. 0:01:25.760 --> 0:01:27.200 First of all, I want to congratulate you on having 0:01:27.240 --> 0:01:30.400 a phenomenal body of work. And everything you just said 0:01:30.560 --> 0:01:32.679 is exactly what I felt when I. 0:01:32.680 --> 0:01:34.440 Was listening to the album. 0:01:34.440 --> 0:01:37.160 It's almost like the mentality is like Hakuna Matada, like 0:01:37.800 --> 0:01:41.240 stress over things, no need to have worries. Let's just 0:01:41.520 --> 0:01:43.679 live in an age of pleasure. How did you get there? 0:01:43.760 --> 0:01:44.000 Though? 0:01:44.160 --> 0:01:46.559 Ooh? How did I get there? I mean, I think life, 0:01:46.760 --> 0:01:48.440 you know, and I'm still you know, still on a 0:01:48.520 --> 0:01:51.559 journey as we all are. But I think I got 0:01:51.760 --> 0:01:55.360 locked in with me, you know. And I think a 0:01:55.400 --> 0:01:58.200 lot of times we look at it, especially as artists, 0:01:58.240 --> 0:02:00.680 and things come to us and sometimes don't, and we 0:02:00.760 --> 0:02:03.640 look at things as like, oh we failed, or we 0:02:03.680 --> 0:02:08.440 should be working much harder. Our happiness is dependent on 0:02:10.880 --> 0:02:15.320 things that come to us, you know, good things, great things. 0:02:15.639 --> 0:02:18.400 But internally I had to get locked in with me. 0:02:18.639 --> 0:02:20.520 I had to get really locked in with me and 0:02:20.760 --> 0:02:26.480 reprogramming my mind and exercising them muscle to be Yeah, 0:02:26.520 --> 0:02:30.080 to get to a point where my inner voice, what 0:02:30.200 --> 0:02:32.919 I was telling myself, all those things, the affirmations, all 0:02:32.960 --> 0:02:37.040 of it just rewired. I'm rewired right now. I feel 0:02:37.080 --> 0:02:38.799 like I'm on my third life right now. 0:02:38.840 --> 0:02:39.080 Wow. 0:02:39.240 --> 0:02:43.320 Now you mentioned, you know, you had the age of depression, 0:02:43.400 --> 0:02:46.280 the age of anxiety, the age of all those things. 0:02:46.720 --> 0:02:48.560 You know, what got you out of those places? Was 0:02:48.560 --> 0:02:51.760 it therapy? Was it just taking a break? Was it friends? 0:02:51.960 --> 0:02:55.079 Was it meditating? Was it you know whatever it may 0:02:55.120 --> 0:02:56.880 be writing your book at the time. What got you 0:02:56.960 --> 0:02:59.560 out of that anxiety and depression and some of those 0:02:59.600 --> 0:03:01.200 negative places that you said. 0:03:01.040 --> 0:03:04.000 Yeah, having to go back to the root, the root 0:03:04.080 --> 0:03:10.400 of trauma. You know what. Usually when you're triggered by something, 0:03:10.720 --> 0:03:16.160 it's deeper, you know. And I kind of feel I 0:03:16.160 --> 0:03:19.520 feel like everybody should have free therapy, Like it should 0:03:19.520 --> 0:03:22.040 be free for everybody. We should be paying therapists more. 0:03:22.040 --> 0:03:24.400 We should be paying teachers more, nurses. We can go 0:03:24.480 --> 0:03:26.720 on and on and on, but I think when it 0:03:26.760 --> 0:03:32.959 comes to mental health, being able to understand why we're 0:03:33.000 --> 0:03:37.760 sort of going through life feeling sick mentally or feeling 0:03:39.800 --> 0:03:42.760 like we're in a loop. I just remember being in 0:03:42.760 --> 0:03:47.080 a loop a lot and making the same stories up 0:03:47.120 --> 0:03:51.760 in my mind about things. And I got an emotional 0:03:51.760 --> 0:03:55.400 support coach who is a friend and who also like 0:03:55.440 --> 0:03:58.880 does amazing work, and she said, you're dealing with some 0:03:59.040 --> 0:04:02.280 abandonment rejects and issues. I want you to write down 0:04:02.480 --> 0:04:06.640 when you were little Janelle the first time, if somebody 0:04:06.640 --> 0:04:08.520 didn't show up for you, the first time, you felt 0:04:08.600 --> 0:04:11.000 let down, like, write all these things down. And I 0:04:11.040 --> 0:04:14.120 had to go back. And I think also, you know, 0:04:14.160 --> 0:04:16.679 being in the pandemic, a lot of things got canceled 0:04:16.680 --> 0:04:18.800 for me, so I had no choice but to sort of, 0:04:19.279 --> 0:04:22.480 you know, stay home. And I had a unique opportunity 0:04:22.520 --> 0:04:25.039 to go inward and to heal those things and have 0:04:25.200 --> 0:04:29.320 and do all the work, the dark stuff by myself, right, 0:04:30.800 --> 0:04:33.080 you know. So I think it's a combination of that 0:04:33.200 --> 0:04:38.000 and then friends too, you know. I just remember being 0:04:38.160 --> 0:04:40.240 out with friends, and so much of my life, I 0:04:40.279 --> 0:04:42.640 was always thinking about the future. I was like, what's next, 0:04:42.680 --> 0:04:46.159 you know, just like when you had when you're a 0:04:47.480 --> 0:04:50.880 what do you call an entrepreneur? You know, I started 0:04:50.880 --> 0:04:53.080 out as an indie artist, so I always had to 0:04:53.440 --> 0:04:57.040 sort of be the leader, you know. I'm like, I 0:04:57.080 --> 0:05:01.680 can't afford to mess up, you know, and when I 0:05:01.720 --> 0:05:04.480 would be our friends, I wouldn't be present. And so 0:05:05.160 --> 0:05:08.960 I also had an opportunity to reconnect with my friends 0:05:09.200 --> 0:05:12.760 and have them hold me accountable, like, yo, we here, 0:05:13.080 --> 0:05:15.960 we here, we're here, like stay here with us, we 0:05:16.000 --> 0:05:18.880 love you, like everything is gonna be good, you can relax. 0:05:20.520 --> 0:05:22.520 And I felt safe there. I found a safe space. 0:05:23.279 --> 0:05:24.400 Let me ask you a question. I just want to 0:05:24.400 --> 0:05:26.520 ask one thing about you said abandonment issues, right, m h. 0:05:28.920 --> 0:05:31.680 How did you feel or what made you feel that way? 0:05:31.680 --> 0:05:33.440 And the reason I asked is right, I have six 0:05:33.560 --> 0:05:35.640 kids that have four daughters, right, and one of my 0:05:35.680 --> 0:05:39.160 biggest fears is not to show up but something that 0:05:39.279 --> 0:05:42.160 I might think is small that might mean the world 0:05:42.240 --> 0:05:43.800 to them, you know, because you know, we are in 0:05:43.839 --> 0:05:45.800 the industry where we do travel, we are on the road, 0:05:45.880 --> 0:05:48.240 so you know, I'm just what bothered you so much 0:05:48.240 --> 0:05:51.080 about abandonment? Was it something big, like, you know, something 0:05:51.120 --> 0:05:53.120 not happening on Christmas? Or was it something like I 0:05:53.120 --> 0:05:55.720 have my talent show and this person didn't come and 0:05:55.720 --> 0:05:56.600 and made me feel a way. 0:05:56.640 --> 0:05:58.600 So what was the abandonment issue? 0:05:59.520 --> 0:05:59.760 Well? 0:05:59.800 --> 0:06:02.040 I think a lot of it and I've spoken about 0:06:02.080 --> 0:06:05.040 this a lot, but so if you are watching right 0:06:05.080 --> 0:06:08.200 now and you know me, but my father was an addict, 0:06:08.760 --> 0:06:12.840 So him being sort of inconsistent in my life and 0:06:14.400 --> 0:06:19.560 having to sort of navigate. And if you've had family 0:06:20.080 --> 0:06:23.159 close to you or a parent and as an addict, 0:06:23.160 --> 0:06:24.320 then you know what I'm talking about. 0:06:24.480 --> 0:06:24.760 You know. 0:06:27.440 --> 0:06:32.680 That our relationship what a lot of times was like 0:06:34.240 --> 0:06:37.560 where I felt most abandoned and thank god, like he's clean, 0:06:37.600 --> 0:06:40.279 he's sober. Now, we're best friends, he's written a book, 0:06:40.320 --> 0:06:44.640 he's like amazing. But I think that inconsistency. And I 0:06:44.680 --> 0:06:46.760 didn't know that because I was like, I have my mom, 0:06:47.200 --> 0:06:49.360 I have all my aunties, I have so much love 0:06:49.400 --> 0:06:53.400 around me. But just those moments of just like you're 0:06:53.400 --> 0:06:56.960 showing you're not here, you're here now, you're in prison, 0:06:57.440 --> 0:07:02.400 You're not like okay, all right, really inconsistent And that 0:07:02.520 --> 0:07:05.040 was like one of the first things I think that 0:07:05.400 --> 0:07:08.000 when I started to write down things that that bothered, 0:07:08.040 --> 0:07:09.520 that affected me more than I knew. 0:07:10.000 --> 0:07:12.800 Yeah, when you talk about the abandonment and rejecting issues, 0:07:12.800 --> 0:07:15.960 that have to be an incredible obstacle when you're an artist, right, 0:07:17.600 --> 0:07:19.280 And I actually like the label not supporting you the 0:07:19.280 --> 0:07:22.120 way they should, or maybe early on people not coming 0:07:22.160 --> 0:07:24.280 to your shows, or maybe people were not recept it 0:07:24.320 --> 0:07:27.560 to the music. Like how what kind of obstacles does 0:07:27.600 --> 0:07:28.640 that cause when you're an artist. 0:07:29.280 --> 0:07:34.040 I mean, I think this business is designed to make 0:07:34.120 --> 0:07:37.240 us feel, you know, like we have to be competitive, 0:07:37.720 --> 0:07:39.960 or that we're not good enough, you know, or if 0:07:40.000 --> 0:07:43.000 an opportunity goes to another person, that that person is 0:07:43.040 --> 0:07:45.680 better than you. But I mean, as I've you know, 0:07:45.760 --> 0:07:49.360 been in this industry for a little bit, and I 0:07:49.400 --> 0:07:52.960 always I just remembered moments where I thought something was 0:07:53.000 --> 0:07:58.880 for me and then you know, another artist got that 0:07:58.960 --> 0:08:04.320 opportunity or didn't work out, and then fast forward and 0:08:04.360 --> 0:08:07.120 I'm I'm in an even better place and even better 0:08:07.160 --> 0:08:10.440 opportunity has happened. So I've learned that the universe, you know, 0:08:10.480 --> 0:08:12.840 me and my emotional support coach, we talked about this 0:08:12.880 --> 0:08:16.480 a lot, the universe is not trying to do me 0:08:16.480 --> 0:08:19.360 any harm. Sometimes you got to work with the universe. 0:08:19.360 --> 0:08:21.560 You got to get out the way, like get out 0:08:21.600 --> 0:08:24.520 the way. You never know, you know what what is 0:08:24.560 --> 0:08:26.960 being set up for you, And here you are thinking 0:08:27.120 --> 0:08:32.040 you're in control of the situation and you're actually you're 0:08:32.080 --> 0:08:34.520 making matters worse. Just let it, let it flow. 0:08:34.640 --> 0:08:37.920 I call it divine misdirection m you know, because like 0:08:37.920 --> 0:08:39.520 that because in your mind you think you should be 0:08:39.559 --> 0:08:42.079 going this way, but God is like, no, no, this 0:08:42.120 --> 0:08:43.480 is gonna happen, and you're gonna go this way. 0:08:43.480 --> 0:08:45.199 But you're really really end up on the path you're 0:08:45.200 --> 0:08:45.880 supposed to be. 0:08:45.760 --> 0:08:48.320 On right exactly, and you just have to trust that 0:08:49.040 --> 0:08:51.800 and and move with it. I think I'm definitely floating 0:08:51.840 --> 0:08:54.360 a lot more and being more like water, you know, 0:08:55.120 --> 0:09:01.160 just allowing allowing myself to to have to have a 0:09:01.200 --> 0:09:06.280 moment of just drifting in the way, in the way 0:09:06.400 --> 0:09:09.600 that I think about, you know, what I can do, 0:09:09.679 --> 0:09:10.480 who I can be. 0:09:10.920 --> 0:09:13.560 You seem like you're in a happier place now, just 0:09:13.600 --> 0:09:16.319 pleasure in a sad place, but just watching you now, 0:09:16.440 --> 0:09:19.800 watching you perform, watching your videos, watching you around, you 0:09:19.840 --> 0:09:23.319 seem like you're in a place of happiness. 0:09:23.559 --> 0:09:26.720 Yeah, man, I am. I am. And sometimes, like I 0:09:26.800 --> 0:09:29.360 was saying, we were not always there, you know, because 0:09:29.400 --> 0:09:32.680 you have life life life. Depending on where you are, 0:09:32.840 --> 0:09:35.880 we're always going to be trying to problem solve and 0:09:35.920 --> 0:09:39.000 some things are great, but at the same time, everything's happening. 0:09:39.120 --> 0:09:43.200 I say when everything everywhere all at once, like you 0:09:43.200 --> 0:09:46.520 guys have seen that movie and sometimes that that definitely 0:09:46.520 --> 0:09:50.480 has been where I've been, and I know people will 0:09:50.480 --> 0:09:54.640 feel me when I say that, but I'm actively here. 0:09:54.720 --> 0:09:57.720 I think one of the things that I got an 0:09:57.720 --> 0:10:01.840 opportunity to do during the during the pandemic was my 0:10:01.960 --> 0:10:04.839 friends own this party collective everyday people. I don't know 0:10:04.880 --> 0:10:06.960 if y'all heard of everything. Yeah, it started here in 0:10:07.000 --> 0:10:09.320 New York and they've been doing it for over a decade, 0:10:09.360 --> 0:10:10.680 but they're international global. 0:10:10.760 --> 0:10:12.640 Yeah. I saw them in Ghana over New. 0:10:12.679 --> 0:10:16.200 Year exactly, so you know those sort of parts. It's 0:10:16.240 --> 0:10:20.719 like the most beautiful brown and black people together from Ghana, Nigeria, 0:10:20.840 --> 0:10:26.880 South Africa, the Caribbean, Jamaica, Atlanta, New York, like super 0:10:26.880 --> 0:10:31.720 Pan African, the diaspora, together in a safe space, dancing 0:10:31.840 --> 0:10:35.199 free from feeling like police are gonna come in and 0:10:35.679 --> 0:10:39.480 you know, shut us down or stop all the black 0:10:39.559 --> 0:10:43.000 joy that is happening, free from gun violence. It's just like, 0:10:43.720 --> 0:10:46.120 it's what you fight for, it's what you fight to protect, 0:10:46.160 --> 0:10:48.400 what I've always tried to fight to protect that safe 0:10:48.400 --> 0:10:51.120 space for us, and so seeing that gave me so 0:10:51.240 --> 0:10:53.440 much joy. It gave me something to write about. It 0:10:53.520 --> 0:10:56.280 gave me a soundtrack. Is what I like to call 0:10:56.440 --> 0:11:01.280 this album is a soundtrack to our lifestyle. Yeah, so 0:11:01.720 --> 0:11:04.600 that has been a beautiful saving grace because when you 0:11:04.600 --> 0:11:07.440 have community that also is super helpful. That keeps you 0:11:07.480 --> 0:11:10.120 happy because it's like, oh, you get me. You know, 0:11:10.840 --> 0:11:12.560 a lot of times you feel like you're living in 0:11:12.640 --> 0:11:15.800 systems that were never designed for you, that were never 0:11:15.840 --> 0:11:19.720 built for us to actually benefit or have the American dream. 0:11:20.160 --> 0:11:23.280 But when you're around your people and we are together, 0:11:24.400 --> 0:11:27.679 it was like reconnecting with like, this is what it's about. 0:11:28.160 --> 0:11:30.040 This is this is what it's always been about, and 0:11:30.080 --> 0:11:31.720 we have to we have to fight to preserve it. 0:11:31.920 --> 0:11:34.520 Why did you Why did you purposely and purposely make 0:11:34.520 --> 0:11:38.760 the album so short? But I like it though, because 0:11:38.760 --> 0:11:40.599 I was, you know, I was riding riding on the 0:11:40.640 --> 0:11:41.200 way this morning. 0:11:41.240 --> 0:11:44.679 I'm like, it's a vibe, a great vibe. It sounds 0:11:44.720 --> 0:11:47.280 like you're out of contract because the music never stops, Like. 0:11:47.360 --> 0:11:49.200 Yeah, it feels like you're on the island with the 0:11:49.559 --> 0:11:50.719 Oh my god. 0:11:51.440 --> 0:11:51.920 I love it. 0:11:53.320 --> 0:11:55.760 If it made me feel like I was in Ghana for. 0:11:56.120 --> 0:12:00.840 New Years, Yeah, exactly, I love hearing y'all say this, 0:12:00.880 --> 0:12:06.120 because that that was important. I said, I want. What 0:12:06.200 --> 0:12:09.160 I did was we would have those parties together and 0:12:10.640 --> 0:12:12.720 I would I would say, if we have the party 0:12:12.720 --> 0:12:16.000 on Friday or Saturday, we're going to the studio Monday Tuesday, 0:12:16.040 --> 0:12:18.400 and we're gonna make three songs. And if these songs 0:12:18.400 --> 0:12:21.240 can't work at our party. Because I was very specific 0:12:21.280 --> 0:12:23.320 about this, I said, I want my friends to fuck 0:12:23.360 --> 0:12:25.880 with it. I was like, if we love it, that's it. 0:12:26.080 --> 0:12:29.079 Like that's that's all. So I made this with friends 0:12:29.120 --> 0:12:32.840 for friends, and I would tell my DJ DJ NNA 0:12:32.880 --> 0:12:35.400 Quad and I was like, listen, play it. Do not 0:12:35.480 --> 0:12:38.199 say is me. If they're not shazamin, it's not going 0:12:38.200 --> 0:12:40.360 to the album. If they sit down, it's not going 0:12:40.400 --> 0:12:42.079 on the album. So I would literally be in a 0:12:42.120 --> 0:12:44.320 corner with a drink like, oh my god, I got oh, 0:12:44.320 --> 0:12:46.080 I got oh, I got what are they thinking? And 0:12:46.120 --> 0:12:48.240 I tested all the songs like that, and I mean, 0:12:48.280 --> 0:12:50.560 it was just a beautiful thing for people to be 0:12:50.679 --> 0:12:55.160 like float I did like that Champagne ship, I did lipstick. 0:12:55.360 --> 0:12:58.480 Everything got like sort of tested with the people I 0:12:58.520 --> 0:13:01.960 intended for it to be for, and that was enough. 0:13:02.000 --> 0:13:03.800 I wanted to keep it short enough where you wanted 0:13:03.840 --> 0:13:05.679 to keep playing it over and over again if you 0:13:05.800 --> 0:13:08.640 couldn't take a vacation. I wanted you to put this 0:13:08.720 --> 0:13:11.680 on and and feel like, oh, I'm there, I'm in Jamaica, 0:13:11.679 --> 0:13:14.520 I'm in Ghana, and when you're on vacation with friends, 0:13:14.600 --> 0:13:17.320 you want to play it. You know that that brings me. 0:13:18.080 --> 0:13:22.000 Creating and giving people an experience is my purpose. Like 0:13:22.040 --> 0:13:23.240 I love I love doing that. 0:13:23.280 --> 0:13:23.439 Now. 0:13:23.440 --> 0:13:26.000 You also sit on the album, especially in Float that 0:13:26.040 --> 0:13:28.600 you said sometimes you feel like you're your own worst enemy. 0:13:29.080 --> 0:13:29.880 Why do you feel that way? 0:13:29.960 --> 0:13:36.199 Yeah, I said, I used to be my own enemy. Yeah, 0:13:36.360 --> 0:13:41.880 because you know, I think we we live within this matrix, right, 0:13:42.000 --> 0:13:44.760 and even within this matrix is a matrix in our 0:13:44.800 --> 0:13:48.800 mind what we have based on our set of experiences, 0:13:48.880 --> 0:13:53.880 based on our upbringing, our programming. We tell ourselves stories 0:13:53.920 --> 0:13:58.319 and narratives, and you know, some things I'm not proud 0:13:58.320 --> 0:13:59.920 about what I would tell myself. So I was just 0:14:00.040 --> 0:14:04.280 super hard on myself for a very long time. Super 0:14:04.280 --> 0:14:08.600 Perfectionists wanted things to be. If it wasn't exactly how 0:14:08.640 --> 0:14:11.200 it was supposed to be, in my mind, it was trash. 0:14:11.280 --> 0:14:14.440 I couldn't see the beauty even in the flaws or 0:14:14.520 --> 0:14:22.160 the misdirections, the improvisation of life. I couldn't see that, 0:14:22.760 --> 0:14:27.720 and that keeps you in sort of a prison. And 0:14:27.800 --> 0:14:33.160 even in terms of just like yeah, that's it. You know, 0:14:33.280 --> 0:14:38.040 it's like what I think of me will determine my 0:14:38.120 --> 0:14:41.920 quality of life. You know, it's not what you think 0:14:41.960 --> 0:14:43.480 of me or what you think of me, it's what 0:14:43.560 --> 0:14:44.680 the fuck I think. 0:14:44.760 --> 0:14:46.720 But you do know that the fact that you are 0:14:46.760 --> 0:14:49.600 a perfectionist and makes you who you are, Like, that's 0:14:50.040 --> 0:14:50.880 what separates you. 0:14:50.920 --> 0:14:52.480 From another artist out there. 0:14:52.600 --> 0:14:55.000 Like I agree, we can tell that when you put 0:14:55.240 --> 0:14:57.680 energy into something, whether it's a performance, whether it's a 0:14:57.760 --> 0:15:00.480 video like We're gonna get Ganail money today top like 0:15:00.520 --> 0:15:02.320 the ain't gonna be no half assed just roll out 0:15:02.320 --> 0:15:02.960 of bed like we're. 0:15:02.880 --> 0:15:05.080 Gonna get This is something planned, This is something that. 0:15:05.000 --> 0:15:07.640 You've thought of for years, That that that you know 0:15:07.720 --> 0:15:08.640 you're putting into fruition. 0:15:08.720 --> 0:15:10.960 But I wonder what makes what makes you? I wonder 0:15:10.960 --> 0:15:13.200 what you think makes you the best version of yourself? 0:15:13.240 --> 0:15:15.720 Is it perfection or happiness? Because I feel like you're 0:15:15.720 --> 0:15:17.480 super happy on this out It's like. 0:15:17.800 --> 0:15:21.200 It's at Yeah, I think I mean, I think you're right. 0:15:21.240 --> 0:15:23.880 I think it's balanced. You gotta have balance. I think 0:15:24.120 --> 0:15:30.120 when it's when it when you start obsessing over when 0:15:30.120 --> 0:15:32.400 the process is in fun, I don't love it. I 0:15:32.400 --> 0:15:35.600 think I think how you get there is also important, 0:15:35.920 --> 0:15:38.680 you know, I think sometimes and it's not all the time, 0:15:38.680 --> 0:15:40.760 but there are moments where we get the end result 0:15:40.800 --> 0:15:43.480 and when you guys see it, it's like it feels, 0:15:44.600 --> 0:15:49.440 you know, remarkable or intentional. But how I how we 0:15:49.480 --> 0:15:53.720 get there too is important. Like I redesigned just in 0:15:53.800 --> 0:15:56.200 terms of how you even do business now, I'm like, 0:15:56.240 --> 0:15:58.680 we don't just because this is the way that it's 0:15:58.680 --> 0:16:01.600 supposed to be dying gonna know. We need to make 0:16:01.600 --> 0:16:08.480 it fun, you label boy? Yeah no, no, no, no, no, 0:16:08.560 --> 0:16:10.840 we need how do we make this fun? How do 0:16:10.920 --> 0:16:13.800 we make this fun? How do we what? What? 0:16:13.800 --> 0:16:14.080 What? 0:16:14.080 --> 0:16:17.480 What is not making us want to even meet? Like 0:16:17.560 --> 0:16:20.280 how do we have meetings and they don't feel so heavy? 0:16:20.720 --> 0:16:23.000 They don't feel so long and drawn out? Like we 0:16:23.120 --> 0:16:26.600 got to get to a point where we're redesigning how 0:16:26.640 --> 0:16:29.560 we're how we're creating it. And even with this project, 0:16:29.600 --> 0:16:33.200 I was like, I'm not I'm not forcing anything. I'm 0:16:33.240 --> 0:16:37.320 going off feel how do I feel? How is this 0:16:37.400 --> 0:16:38.920 making you feel? You know? 0:16:39.400 --> 0:16:40.920 Yeah, what did you get to the point where? 0:16:41.240 --> 0:16:43.080 And maybe you you've always been there where it seems 0:16:43.120 --> 0:16:45.840 like you're so free with your sexuality. And I mean 0:16:45.920 --> 0:16:48.520 we've seen you perform, you know, with your top off, 0:16:48.520 --> 0:16:50.880 We've seen you swimming between legs, we've seen you coming 0:16:50.880 --> 0:16:52.320 out of the water. It just seems like you're so 0:16:52.480 --> 0:16:54.880 free and happy. When did you get to that point? 0:16:54.960 --> 0:16:57.960 It's the age of pleasure? Baby, you know, it's like 0:16:58.200 --> 0:17:01.320 it's a movement. It's not just me like you, you 0:17:01.520 --> 0:17:06.040 feel people wanting to And I just gave myself permission, 0:17:06.600 --> 0:17:12.000 you know, I just divested in certain systems and programming 0:17:12.080 --> 0:17:19.919 and and uh, you know it's like why not, you know, 0:17:20.040 --> 0:17:26.960 why why would I waste my earth experience? Scared to jump, 0:17:27.080 --> 0:17:32.960 scared scared to exercise my freedom? You know why? Why? Who? 0:17:33.040 --> 0:17:35.320 What am I concerned about? And once you deal with 0:17:35.359 --> 0:17:42.280 that and you release, you know, your concerns and you 0:17:42.320 --> 0:17:44.240 give yourself permission, it's a different world. 0:17:44.280 --> 0:17:46.760 And you never were nervous that people are going to 0:17:46.800 --> 0:17:49.120 be too judgmental, or the label was going to feel 0:17:49.119 --> 0:17:51.760 this way, or how my fans might look, or if 0:17:51.760 --> 0:17:53.119 there's young like you never. 0:17:53.000 --> 0:17:54.840 Felt that way. To church people that followed me, you 0:17:54.880 --> 0:17:55.760 never felt. 0:17:56.640 --> 0:17:58.600 Yeah, I mean, I am my label. I'm signed to 0:17:58.640 --> 0:18:02.280 my own label since since the beginning. Wonderland Records shout out. 0:18:03.040 --> 0:18:04.919 But yeah, of course I have a partnership and all 0:18:04.960 --> 0:18:07.760 those things. But I mean, at this point, you know, 0:18:07.880 --> 0:18:12.480 I'm very thankful for the career that I've had. Like 0:18:12.560 --> 0:18:14.639 I started off selling CDs out of my trunk and 0:18:14.680 --> 0:18:17.320 living in a boarding house with six other girls, Like 0:18:17.400 --> 0:18:21.200 I know how to hustle, I know how to work, 0:18:21.400 --> 0:18:25.399 and you know, I have big ideas and I know 0:18:27.280 --> 0:18:29.520 I have a great team. I have a great creative team. 0:18:30.040 --> 0:18:33.760 I have a safe space, and that's important. I will 0:18:33.840 --> 0:18:37.200 be lying if I told you I always felt this free. 0:18:37.280 --> 0:18:41.080 I didn't. I did not feel safe to be this 0:18:41.200 --> 0:18:45.040 version of myself for a very long time. And I 0:18:45.080 --> 0:18:48.119 had to sort of forgive myself for that too, because 0:18:48.160 --> 0:18:52.080 you think about so many years that you lived concerned 0:18:52.760 --> 0:18:56.800 about Oh well, now I'm Janelle mon A, so I 0:18:56.840 --> 0:19:02.720 have to whatever I've I've given them. You know, I've 0:19:02.720 --> 0:19:06.840 had success because of this, you know, this this sort 0:19:06.880 --> 0:19:11.520 of part of me that I've I've shown them what 0:19:11.720 --> 0:19:19.399 happens if I, you know, become the glitch, glitch in 0:19:19.480 --> 0:19:22.800 that you know, glitch in my in that matrix, And 0:19:23.359 --> 0:19:26.800 what happens, what happens if I if I decide that 0:19:27.440 --> 0:19:29.400 I want to be all of me, and I think 0:19:29.440 --> 0:19:30.960 what you're seeing now is me being all of me. 0:19:31.000 --> 0:19:36.760 I think people don't realize how much, you know, as 0:19:36.840 --> 0:19:38.919 much as we love our families and the way we 0:19:39.000 --> 0:19:41.600 grew up and we grew up in these in church 0:19:41.800 --> 0:19:45.240 and and all these like sort of systems and ways 0:19:45.280 --> 0:19:47.720 of life, how much that how much we carry that 0:19:47.880 --> 0:19:51.600 with us when we're when we are evolving, and there's 0:19:51.680 --> 0:19:56.639 this constant struggle of honoring that side of you, that 0:19:56.640 --> 0:19:59.440 that tribe that has shown up for you, and also 0:19:59.520 --> 0:20:03.480 honoring where you are now and who you've become. And 0:20:04.200 --> 0:20:08.480 I think even just in terms of yeah, just in 0:20:08.600 --> 0:20:11.720 terms of safety, like I was always taught cover up, 0:20:13.560 --> 0:20:16.320 you know, you you don't want to draw too much 0:20:16.359 --> 0:20:20.400 attention to you. You could be raped if you're going 0:20:20.440 --> 0:20:25.600 down the street at midnight in a short mini skirt, 0:20:25.800 --> 0:20:29.359 you know, or when you're in church. For me, it 0:20:29.480 --> 0:20:34.280 was skirt to the floor. Yeah. And then and then 0:20:34.320 --> 0:20:36.320 you see how they talk about other people, Oh look 0:20:36.320 --> 0:20:40.040 at her, Oh she fast, Oh she look a look 0:20:40.080 --> 0:20:43.879 at her skirt, And don't show your cleavage, don't show 0:20:43.920 --> 0:20:47.560 your breast because people will not pay attention to your message. 0:20:47.920 --> 0:20:51.560 These are things that I was programmed with, like don't 0:20:51.600 --> 0:20:56.040 don't you're not if you show your skin or you 0:20:56.040 --> 0:20:59.960 you know, show too much skin, you could not be 0:21:00.080 --> 0:21:03.840 taking seriously as an artist. And the slut shaming, you know, 0:21:03.880 --> 0:21:06.400 even in high school for girls who were having sex. 0:21:06.480 --> 0:21:08.240 It was just like, you know, and I'm non binary, 0:21:08.560 --> 0:21:12.520 but growing up as a girl, these things were were 0:21:12.560 --> 0:21:15.400 always implanted me. And then let's not even talk about 0:21:15.400 --> 0:21:17.240 the reverse side. Sorry, yeah, now y'all got me talking 0:21:18.119 --> 0:21:24.240 of when I decide. You know, I love wearing suits. 0:21:24.359 --> 0:21:28.000