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Speaker 1: We're going to try a new segment on the show.

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Speaker 1: It's Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning, because, as you know,

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Speaker 1: we are innovators in entertainment and no one is ever duplicators.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, people copy you.

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Speaker 3: It's like the highest form of flattery.

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Speaker 1: Well, yeah, they wish they could copy us on this,

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Speaker 1: but they can't keep up.

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Speaker 4: So, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to good news bad news.

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Speaker 1: I love it, real news stories, but with a twist

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Speaker 1: of good or bad at the very end.

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Speaker 2: I'm down.

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Speaker 4: Let's get right into it. You'll understand.

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Speaker 1: First piece of news, the TSA says they're going to

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Speaker 1: increase the three ounces of liquid rule. That is welcome

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Speaker 1: news because now you can finally bring like a normal

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Speaker 1: sized toothpaste on the plane with you. The bad news,

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Speaker 1: it's not gonna happen for sixteen years.

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Speaker 4: I'm serious. They're making these new scanners for it. It's

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Speaker 4: going to take two decades to produce.

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Speaker 2: Talk about it.

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Speaker 3: This is why people are still confused when they're waiting

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Speaker 3: in the TSA.

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Speaker 1: It's not all good news. Remember, some of it is

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Speaker 1: bad news. The next good news bad news. This past year,

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Speaker 1: companies have been firing less people.

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Speaker 4: Brook, why did you win set? Then we're firing less.

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Speaker 2: It is good. But what's coming next? Well, you know,

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Speaker 2: bad news.

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Speaker 1: Maybe you're thinking, wow, the big wigs are finally appreciating

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Speaker 1: the working class. Actually, no, bad news. They're just not

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Speaker 1: calling it firing anymore. They're calling it layoffs because that

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Speaker 1: terminology hurts people's feelings. Less still letting go just as

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Speaker 1: many people.

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Speaker 2: One more Wait, if you.

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Speaker 1: Want one more good news bad news, We're gonna start

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Speaker 1: with the bad news on this one. First, studies show

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Speaker 1: the average American requires less sleep to function normally.

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Speaker 2: No, it's bad.

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Speaker 1: It's troubling because we all love sleeping, I know. But

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Speaker 1: here's the good news. Instead of sleep, the average American

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Speaker 1: takes five lazy days a month to relax.

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Speaker 4: Hey, that's sixty.

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Speaker 1: Days a year where you do absolutely nothing all day

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Speaker 1: long for your mental average.

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Speaker 2: Let's go. I think that Jose is the one that's skewing.

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Speaker 1: Sixty days of doom scrolling watching TV and listening to

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Speaker 1: the Brook and Jeffrey podcast.

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Speaker 3: Or do these people have kids or jobs or anything.

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Speaker 1: No, they do, but they ignore all of that just

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Speaker 1: to listen to our show. Yeahs more good news, bad news.

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Speaker 4: Time for shock collar question of the day, bad news.

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Speaker 1: One of us is definitely getting electrocuted in the throat.

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Speaker 1: So Jake, it's up to you. Now, good news, bad news,

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Speaker 1: shock collar.

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Speaker 4: Let's do it, all right, Listen up.

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Speaker 2: I know this is going to be difficult for this group,

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Speaker 2: but you're gonna have to actually be funny for today's shot. Color.

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Speaker 4: Someone call my agent.

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Speaker 2: I did not agree to this, Jakes, all right, I've

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Speaker 2: heard this show once or twice and I know that's

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Speaker 2: not really Your guys are strong, but I have no

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Speaker 2: choice because today is National Tell a Joke Day. I'm

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Speaker 2: going to try and make it as easy as possible

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Speaker 2: for you four to come across as funny as we

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Speaker 2: do a special finish the pun edition oflenty of twenty.

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Speaker 2: It's very simple. I'll read the setup of a pun.

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Speaker 2: You just have to correctly figure out the punchline and

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Speaker 2: you're safe. We do this every day. If you screw

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Speaker 2: it up and you get it wrong, and you embarrass

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Speaker 2: me in front of our dozens of listeners, you'll be

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Speaker 2: at risk for your execution from a dog shot. Because

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Speaker 2: it seems like an exaggeration, Let's start with the woman

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Speaker 2: who's an outspoken lover of puns. That's Alexis, Alexis, here's

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Speaker 2: your joke. Why did Adele cross the road? One of

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Speaker 2: our rolling in the deep?

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Speaker 3: That has nothing to do with it?

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Speaker 1: Oh?

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Speaker 4: What's her song? Hello from?

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Speaker 1: Oh?

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Speaker 3: It's something about hello and to say hello from the

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Speaker 3: other side, to.

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Speaker 2: Say hello from the other side, it's correct. Funny work, Alexis.

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Speaker 2: I knew you loved pot. We're over to brook Brook.

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Speaker 2: Here's your joke. What kind of concert only costs forty

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Speaker 2: five cents?

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Speaker 3: Fifty concert would cost fifty cents?

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Speaker 2: I know this?

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Speaker 4: Oh yeah, this is kind of a famous one famous.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you have something to do with fifty cents.

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Speaker 4: We can't help you.

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Speaker 2: Why can't you help me? Is that the rule? Nickelback

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Speaker 2: fifty with Nickelback? Ye, a fifty cent concert featuring Nickelback.

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Speaker 2: That's correct. Got that two? Where's the math? I know

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Speaker 2: the math.

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Speaker 1: It's so refreshing for us to actually be funny.

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Speaker 2: I love it. We're over to Jose now, Jose, here's

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Speaker 2: your joke. What did the grape say when it got crushed?

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Speaker 3: Oh?

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Speaker 2: What would why would it be funny get smashed? And

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Speaker 2: maybe it would?

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Speaker 4: Why what are you doing?

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Speaker 2: Help?

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Speaker 4: No, you're not supposed to give each other answer.

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Speaker 2: I'll say wine, just let out a little wine. I

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Speaker 2: don't want him to fail.

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Speaker 4: He would have been upset for the next three hours.

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Speaker 4: He loves a good joke.

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Speaker 2: He wants to hear more of these.

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Speaker 4: All right, Jeffrey, were over to you.

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Speaker 2: A crazy wife says to her husband that mooser falling

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Speaker 2: from the sky. The husband says, it's what.

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Speaker 4: Oh man, these are tough puns. This world is ending.

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Speaker 4: That's not good. Yeah, I'm thinking like it's raining men. No, oh,

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Speaker 4: it's it's rein deer.

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Speaker 2: It's rain deer. That's correct, Jeffrey, We're four four really hard.

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Speaker 2: We're back to Alexis joke. I had a crazy dream

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Speaker 2: last night. I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda.

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Speaker 2: Turns out it was I.

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Speaker 4: Immediate orange Fanta.

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Speaker 3: It was fant it was faint, faint, I don't know,

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Speaker 3: yeahs I.

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Speaker 2: Was looking for. It was a fanta seas fantasy. This

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Speaker 2: is why I hate We're over to Brook now Brook.

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Speaker 2: Here's your joke. Ladies. If your guy can't appreciate your

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Speaker 2: fruit jokes, you need to let that. Oh yeah, looking

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Speaker 2: for one word.

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Speaker 4: It's such a good one.

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Speaker 2: Fruit jokes. If ladies, if you're a guy, can't you

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Speaker 2: need to let that vegetable. You need to let him go.

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Speaker 2: You need to.

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Speaker 4: Brock open mic night. Come on, Brook nail the joke.

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Speaker 2: No, don't you there's a fruit joke and he and

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Speaker 2: he doesn't appreciate it. I'm sorry, that's time. You need

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Speaker 2: to let that man go. Mango, Mango. We're over to Jose.

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Speaker 4: Jose.

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Speaker 2: You need to get this one right or Jeffrey's gonna

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Speaker 2: win the pun addition of plenty of twenty pressure. Did

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Speaker 2: you hear about the restaurant on the Moon? I heard

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Speaker 2: the food was good, but it had no service. Wi Fi.

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Speaker 3: Like lunar.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, it's a space joke, a space rocks.

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Speaker 2: I can't think of it. I'm sorry. Times up looking

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Speaker 2: for atmosphere. Jeffrey, you've won today's edition of Good Job.

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Speaker 3: Twenty jeff you got a good set right now stage

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Speaker 3: In honor of Brooke and her fifty cent nickelback question,

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Speaker 3: somebody wanted to hear candy shop by fifty request.

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Speaker 1: Who better to do it than the one that grinded

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Speaker 1: to it back in high school, Brook Fox, I'll take

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Speaker 1: you there.

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Speaker 2: I'll take you to the candy show, I'll let you

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Speaker 2: lick the lollipop.

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Speaker 4: As your shot collar question of the day.

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Speaker 2: That was so dirty When I was that was no

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Speaker 2: idea I knew.

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Speaker 1: Now it's back to the non funny part of the show,

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Speaker 1: with your phone tap coming.

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Speaker 4: Up in just a few minutes.

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Speaker 3: Broken Jeffrey in the Morning.