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Speaker 1: Hi, guys, welcome back to I Do Part two. It's

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Speaker 1: your celebrity mentor Jen Fessler, and I am recording at

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Speaker 1: Bravo Gone in Las Vegas and my guest today. You

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Speaker 1: guys know her, You've watched her, You've loved her. She

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Speaker 1: has an accent you can't really forget because she's actually

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Speaker 1: an East Coast girl like me from the Real Housewives

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Speaker 1: of Orange County. It's Gina Kerschenheider.

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Speaker 2: You got it, I did yea yay me.

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Speaker 1: Okay, listen. We are absolutely thrilled to have you. I'm

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Speaker 1: thrilled to be here. And as you know, this is

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Speaker 1: I Do Part two. So we talk about sort of

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Speaker 1: the first part of your romantic life and where you

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Speaker 1: are right now. And I feel like you've really gotten

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Speaker 1: it right this second time. I yeah, you know.

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Speaker 3: I think, just like anything, it takes you a couple

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Speaker 3: of tries to get good at something, and I think, yes,

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Speaker 3: I feel very good about it this time.

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Speaker 1: As a viewer, it's so sweet. I love your dynamic. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I really do. So tell us about how long you

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Speaker 1: were married and how many kids you have. Just fill

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Speaker 1: in the blanks. Even if our viewers have been following

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Speaker 1: you for years.

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Speaker 3: It's so funny because I don't want you to hold

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Speaker 3: me to the flame on this because it's been a

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Speaker 3: long time. It's like I don't even really remember, but

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Speaker 3: I'm pretty sure I was married for eight years total.

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Speaker 3: I met my ex husband in college.

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Speaker 2: We were very young.

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Speaker 3: Yep, we got engaged very quick, married, very quick, kids,

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Speaker 3: very quick. I moved to California pregnant with my third

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Speaker 3: child ten years ago.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, that is quick. It's very quick. And it's

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Speaker 3: actually crazy because I moved pregnant with Luca, had Luca,

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Speaker 3: and then like a year and a half later, I

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Speaker 3: got cast it on the show. So most of my

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Speaker 3: life in California has been the ride has been Housewives

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Speaker 3: has been a part of it.

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Speaker 1: That's really crazy.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it is very crazy.

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Speaker 1: I mean, obviously I want to know like how that's

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Speaker 1: affected things and certainly a relationship now, but before we

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Speaker 1: go there, I still want to know a little bit

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Speaker 1: more about your ex husband. Okay, so and not just

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Speaker 1: about him, but you know about sort of your situation, like,

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Speaker 1: for instance, how did you know that it was over,

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Speaker 1: that it was done? Like when did you kind of

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Speaker 1: you know?

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Speaker 3: It is interesting because I feel like because I was

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Speaker 3: so young. People come from parents that are happily married, honestly,

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Speaker 3: and so I didn't even really honestly think about divorce

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Speaker 3: as like a thing or an option or something that

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Speaker 3: would happen. I think when I look back on it,

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Speaker 3: I understand that we were very young. I think we

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Speaker 3: moved away from New York, which was our home base,

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Speaker 3: from all of our support, family, everything, And I think

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Speaker 3: my ex husband lost his way when we moved to California.

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Speaker 3: He had had an affair, which I've been very open about,

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Speaker 3: and still I didn't think that it was over. I thought, Okay,

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Speaker 3: how are you going to fix this right?

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Speaker 2: And we.

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Speaker 3: It just kind of got to the point where I

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Speaker 3: felt like I just kept waiting for him to like

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Speaker 3: show up and prove to me that he wanted to

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Speaker 3: be in it. And then at a certain point, like

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Speaker 3: waiting for him to want to be in it, I

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Speaker 3: realized that I didn't even.

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Speaker 2: Want to be in it, you know.

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Speaker 3: But it is pretty scary because then you think about,

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Speaker 3: like what are honestly just like, what are your options?

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Speaker 2: What are you going to do?

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Speaker 3: I moved away from everything I knew, I moved away from,

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Speaker 3: you know, I worked in New York all of that,

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Speaker 3: and like just to think about the difference in dynamic

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Speaker 3: of like what that looks like when you never thought

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Speaker 3: that that was even a possibility.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, well, listen, divorce is I feel like they put

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Speaker 1: it on the list of like the most traumatic, like

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Speaker 1: it's death, divorce, I think moving. But I've also heard

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Speaker 1: it said that until you're at the point where you're

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Speaker 1: like I don't care. I don't care about the money.

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Speaker 1: M you obviously will always care about your kids, but

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Speaker 1: you're at the point where it's like this is not

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Speaker 1: it's going to be better for the kids. I don't

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Speaker 1: care about being single, Like I just I gotta get out.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, And I think that that's kind of what Even

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Speaker 3: when we did separate and I did start the divorce

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Speaker 3: process and all of that, and we were very much

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Speaker 3: not together, there was a point in time then that

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Speaker 3: he wanted to reconcile and it was like he all

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Speaker 3: of a sudden has epiphany and he wanted his family

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Speaker 3: and he wanted to dad. And it was very short lived,

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Speaker 3: and I but I did it because I felt like

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Speaker 3: I owed it to my kids. And then it just

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Speaker 3: all imploded horribly, And then it got to the point

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Speaker 3: where I knew it could never go about that, right,

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Speaker 3: So yes, and so I mean he really left me

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Speaker 3: no option to stay by the end of our relationship,

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Speaker 3: like there was literally nothing there. And then you look

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Speaker 3: back and I'm like, honestly, like, I don't I just

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Speaker 3: don't think that we were supposed to be together, Like

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Speaker 3: I think we were supposed to be together in the

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Speaker 3: way where we have three beautiful children and we were

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Speaker 3: supposed to be parents together, because I truly you believe that,

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Speaker 3: But I don't think we were supposed to be a

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Speaker 3: romantic couple.

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Speaker 1: I mean, that's like the greatest news ever. I hope

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Speaker 1: that every door back and face, yes, well that was

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Speaker 1: a mistake.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, Like yeah, I think like if more people can

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Speaker 3: just say to themselves, like this is a.

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Speaker 1: Mistake, that was a mistake, and we're moving on.

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Speaker 3: And it allows you to segue out of it more

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Speaker 3: gracefully and just And I don't think, like I don't

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Speaker 3: even regret it, Like it was a time in life.

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Speaker 3: It served its purpose, and it was a part of

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Speaker 3: my life. Yeah, of course, but it wasn't meant to

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Speaker 3: be forever, right, Yeah, I love it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, all right, So listeners, listen, sometimes you just got

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Speaker 1: to say this this, okay, So anyway, tell me a

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Speaker 1: little bit about Travis. I'm looking at his sweet face

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Speaker 1: right now. I know.

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Speaker 3: Sorry, that was so uncomfortable for him to have to

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Speaker 3: listen to. Well he knows ever anything was it?

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Speaker 2: Travis? Like whatever, I've heard it all.

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Speaker 1: Well, we're big Travis fans. Tell us a little bit

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Speaker 1: about how long you guys have been together, how you met.

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Speaker 3: I'm a big Travis fan till we've been together for

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Speaker 3: over six years. And it's actually funny because if you

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Speaker 3: ask me versus if you asked Travis how we met,

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Speaker 3: we actually have like two different stories.

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Speaker 1: It's a little messed up.

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Speaker 2: It is messed up.

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Speaker 3: It's a little messy, John, Yes, it's a little messy

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Speaker 3: if you touch yes, if you if you ask Travis,

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Speaker 3: he deduces it down to I slid into his DMS, okay,

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Speaker 3: which sounds horrifying and is so it makes me sound

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Speaker 3: like I was out there just like sliding into creepy

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Speaker 3: men's like DM like I would never do that. We

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Speaker 3: had It was a woman actually, her name is Shay.

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Speaker 3: She was doing my hair and meekup at the time

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Speaker 3: on the show, and she her husband worked with Travis

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Speaker 3: at the time, and she was like, you know, I

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Speaker 3: know this one guy and he's going through this, he's divorced,

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Speaker 3: he's going through this divorce whatever, and he's so sweet

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Speaker 3: and he's so kind and he's like the best guy.

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Speaker 3: And I looked at his picture and to be honest,

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Speaker 3: like I didn't like love his in photographs. And I

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Speaker 3: was like, but I loved there was something about him.

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Speaker 3: It was literally how happy and how his face lit

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Speaker 3: up when he was in pictures with his children, and

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Speaker 3: I really liked that. And then I was split into

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Speaker 3: his se yes like a little how I was like,

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Speaker 3: you know what, you gotta go for it.

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Speaker 2: I had a friend who encouraged me.

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Speaker 3: He encouraged me to do it, and he's like, he's

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Speaker 3: so cute, he looks so nice, Just do it, slid

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Speaker 3: in his DMS. We talked for like a while back

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Speaker 3: and forth, and then we did end up going on

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Speaker 3: a date, which I triple booked, and he was so

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Speaker 3: good about what does that mean?

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Speaker 2: Like I I to other to date and I not

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Speaker 2: with dates. I'm not a time but two other things.

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Speaker 3: It was like my best friend taught on his birthday

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Speaker 3: and like one other thing that I was like a

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Speaker 3: serial triple booker back in the day before I got

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Speaker 3: myself organized and got together right, and he was very

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Speaker 3: sweet about it. So we ended up having like an

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Speaker 3: early bird special like five pm dinner at this like

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Speaker 3: Italian place, and then I ended up It was actually

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Speaker 3: really funny because we were having such an amazing time

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Speaker 3: that I was like, why don't you just come with

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Speaker 3: me to my best friend's birthday.

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Speaker 2: I was like, it's going to be lots of.

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Speaker 3: Couples, you know, it'll be totally cool, and he was like, okay,

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Speaker 3: And then we show up and none of the women

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Speaker 3: my friends had their husbands with them, so he walked

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Speaker 3: into like fifteen of my girlfriends on this first date

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Speaker 3: like the lion's done.

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Speaker 2: It was the best.

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Speaker 1: So you know, if you could survive.

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Speaker 2: That exactly, I was like, you're a keeper.

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Speaker 1: Listen. My guess is that whether or not you slided,

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Speaker 1: you slid into his DMS. I think he probably took

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Speaker 1: one look at you. Well.

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Speaker 3: To go back to that point too, what I realized

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Speaker 3: is I didn't love him in his photos at the time,

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Speaker 3: but in all honesty, I see that as like such

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Speaker 3: a plus column now because he just didn't carry. He

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Speaker 3: wasn't like a guy who was like love me to

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Speaker 3: take a good picture, you know, and in person he's like,

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Speaker 3: actually very handsome.

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Speaker 1: I agree. It's interesting because my husband, my only requirement

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Speaker 1: when I was young, in my twenties was that you're

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Speaker 1: going to fit up. He has to be tall, period,

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Speaker 1: that's it. I was like, well, you're even taller than

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Speaker 1: I am. How tall are you? I'm fivey yeah, now

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Speaker 1: I'm like five six. And but I like to break

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Speaker 1: a strength she always talks about. I was like, has

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Speaker 1: to be tall. I don't. He doesn't have to be rich,

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Speaker 1: he doesn't have to be gorgeous, he doesn't have to

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Speaker 1: be he just has to be tall. And you can

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Speaker 1: turn around and se Jeffes, there's five six. Well you

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Speaker 1: know what he did. He does dify. But the point

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Speaker 1: is right, like you just don't know. You have to

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Speaker 1: feel it like you have to.

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Speaker 3: You don't eat right, and there's always going to be

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Speaker 3: things that you have to deal with exactly, and and

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Speaker 3: that's so true to life. And when you fall in love,

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Speaker 3: you fall hard, and that's it. But I will say

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Speaker 3: my first thing out of my mouth when I Matt

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Speaker 3: Travis was oh my god, you're still tall.

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Speaker 2: So I did I checked that box. You did check

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Speaker 2: that box.

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Speaker 1: So being on Housewives puts obviously your relationship under a

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Speaker 1: magnifying glass. So tell us about because it sounds like

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Speaker 1: the show was helpful and did some good things in

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Speaker 1: terms of your relationship with Travis. I so I'm just

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Speaker 1: making that up.

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Speaker 3: I don't know, well, I don't know. I think that

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Speaker 3: actually the thing that was happening. I'm just very honest

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Speaker 3: about everything, right, So I will say I don't know

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Speaker 3: if the show had like a direct effect on our relationship.

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Speaker 3: What I appreciate about pre appreciate about the show is

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Speaker 3: I think the show has accurately shown our relationship.

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Speaker 1: And I know that you're so you know, that's all

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Speaker 1: on you. That's great. I mean that you are so

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Speaker 1: authentic and that you've been willing to oh yeah.

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Speaker 3: And I think I'm very happy about the fact that, like,

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Speaker 3: when I look at it, it's not perfect, and we've

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Speaker 3: obviously gone through some heavy things, but it's it's us

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Speaker 3: and we're in it, and you can see that we

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Speaker 3: love each other. And I think it shows the real

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Speaker 3: relationship that we have and the connection that we have

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Speaker 3: and the love that we have for each other. So

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Speaker 3: I'm very happy. I'm happy that the show was able

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Speaker 3: to also show like what a good person Trav is

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Speaker 3: and like you know I and also like it's a

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Speaker 3: little scary for the men cheaf, you know. So I

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Speaker 3: was and I didn't. I didn't start my show with

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Speaker 3: a husband, right like he he didn't. I was married,

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Speaker 3: but he didn't participate, right. So I had never filmed

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Speaker 3: with a guy before a period, and so I was

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Speaker 3: that was like nerve wracking for me.

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Speaker 1: I think that a lot of women, it's funny, like

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Speaker 1: feel badly about their husband or their their partners participation

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Speaker 1: on the show because they're dogged. Like even if somebody

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Speaker 1: literally said that to me today that I ran into

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Speaker 1: a housewife, that it's just hard for her partner because

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Speaker 1: he doesn't get to defend himself, right, and you know,

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Speaker 1: the women just go like off right. And it's just

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Speaker 1: interesting because I feel like everyone was always rooting for traps,

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Speaker 1: like when you guys broke up. I was a little

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Speaker 1: sick about it.

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Speaker 2: I know it was horrible.

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Speaker 3: I was to.

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Speaker 1: The way.

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Speaker 3: It just was very unfortunate that that was really happening

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Speaker 3: in our relationship, and it really was what I said,

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Speaker 3: it was like there was a circumstance there that is

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Speaker 3: very frightening to me. Yeah, and to you know, I

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Speaker 3: have my kids around and everything, But ultimately, I the

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Speaker 3: decision that I neede to not give up like our

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Speaker 3: beautiful family and our beautiful life just because something scared me.

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Speaker 3: I'm happy that I got to showcase that, and I'm

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Speaker 3: happy that I'm happy that I got to deliver that

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Speaker 3: message because I think that a lot of people do

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Speaker 3: deal with similar circumstances and things that we've had to

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Speaker 3: deal with, and I don't think the solution is giving up.

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Speaker 1: I love everything about that. From my own personal experience,

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Speaker 1: I completely agree with you. My husband and I were separated,

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Speaker 1: got back together, and I couldn't be more grateful. Yeah, okay,

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Speaker 1: so I think this is kind of interesting. I know

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Speaker 1: that your viewers do too, but that you have such

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Speaker 1: a nice relationship with your ex husband's she girlfriend or

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Speaker 1: wife wife no wife? Yeah, I love that. I think

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Speaker 1: that's so great.

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Speaker 3: I do too, right, I love her. I love it

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Speaker 3: was it hard to get there? No, I mean I

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Speaker 3: would say that it wasn't. You know, just like any anything,

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Speaker 3: when somebody first comes in the mix, you're like, who

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Speaker 3: is this bitch you know hang with my kids exactly? Yes,

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Speaker 3: you and you want to be defensive and you want

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Speaker 3: to be protective, but I think that like when you

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Speaker 3: really you love your children and you see that somebody

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Speaker 3: is good to your children and they're also like good

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Speaker 3: to you. Respect She was very respectful of me and

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Speaker 3: she was very kind to my children, and I would

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Speaker 3: have been an idiot to not have received that. Well.

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Speaker 1: I agree with you. And there are a lot of

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Speaker 1: women who just can't do it. Yeah, right, there's just

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Speaker 1: too much water under the bridge. There's too much history,

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Speaker 1: and they just resent and it's hard probably to picture

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Speaker 1: any other woman, whether or not she's she could be

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Speaker 1: you know, mother Teresa, but with your kids.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but you did it, Yeah, it is. It's not easy.

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Speaker 3: It's not like that was an easy thing for first.

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Speaker 3: And there are things, you know, feelings of jealousy or

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Speaker 3: insecurity or fear just I don't even know what it is.

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Speaker 3: It's just like your instinctual like mind. Yeah, but like

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Speaker 3: you know, I really think that we all need a

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Speaker 3: very adult, mature, cognizant decision to you put our children

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Speaker 3: truly first. And that's what we did at first. It

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Speaker 3: was just put the kids first, because that's what you're

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Speaker 3: supposed to do. And then with time we really developed,

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Speaker 3: like a very lovely said, I could see them as yeah,

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Speaker 3: and she's there for me and she she's now now

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Speaker 3: we're protective of each other, you know. So it is

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Speaker 3: and like, honestly, if that's a message I could put

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Speaker 3: out because I understand there's a lot of women who

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Speaker 3: can't do it, but it's like, do it because it's

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Speaker 3: better for you.

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Speaker 1: That's the whole thing, right, Like having that it frees

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Speaker 1: you up not to have letting go of the you're carrying,

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Speaker 1: Like you become like a team.

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Speaker 2: I think it looks like totally, we're totally a team.

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Speaker 3: Love it and you pick and you're just picking up

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Speaker 3: each other slack, and then you're all able to do

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Speaker 3: so much more and you're able to be there for

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Speaker 3: the kids in such a lovely way. And like my

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Speaker 3: kids don't know, they just know that they have four

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Speaker 3: parents that are on board and love them, you know.

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Speaker 1: So it's a little thing. Yeah. Do you feel like

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Speaker 1: it also helped your relationship with Matt?

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Speaker 2: I think so.

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Speaker 3: I think that I give a lot of credit to

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Speaker 3: me and Matt being able to have a healthy relationship

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Speaker 3: to Travis and Britt because they were.

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Speaker 1: Both Oh so, Matt and Travis are friendly.

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Speaker 3: They're friendly, of course, Yes, everybody's friendly and as it

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Speaker 3: should be. And any time, you know, when early on,

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Speaker 3: when anything that Matt would do, I won't want to

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Speaker 3: be like, what the fuck is he doing?

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Speaker 2: You know what I mean?

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Speaker 3: Travis would always be like, I understand that you feel

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Speaker 3: that way, but you got to put the kids first.

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Speaker 3: He had just a very mature way of always making

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Speaker 3: me do the right thing and encouraging like good communication

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Speaker 3: between Matt and I.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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Speaker 2: And I do believe that Britt was doing the same thing.

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Speaker 1: Becoming a little attracted to Travis as this goes on.

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Speaker 3: Finding him very he is He's very sexy.

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Speaker 2: I'm very sexy anyway.

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Speaker 1: Yes, But like for anyone who you think might be

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Speaker 1: starting like communicating with their ex, you know, like, are

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Speaker 1: there tips for you in terms of like from you,

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Speaker 1: like did you connect a lot first email? Or are

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Speaker 1: there you know, did you use any of those apps? Ure?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, for sure.

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Speaker 3: There was a time at the beginning when you know,

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Speaker 3: things were very not good between me and my ex

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Speaker 3: where we would only communicate on like the court ordered, right,

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Speaker 3: yea ver right, and you should do that because what

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Speaker 3: it does is it prevents you from taking the shot

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Speaker 3: that you want to take, because taking the shot just

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Speaker 3: makes the waters muddy, or it's you take the shot,

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Speaker 3: you're also taking one step further back from where the

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Speaker 3: goal line is.

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Speaker 2: And you have to be with this person.

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Speaker 3: You have a relationship with this person, whether you're married

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Speaker 3: or not, for the rest of your life.

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Speaker 2: Right, what do you want that to look like?

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Speaker 1: Right?

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Speaker 3: And that that's truly how I feel. It's like, do

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Speaker 3: you want that to look messy and ugly and difficult

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Speaker 3: your entire life? Because that person's not going anywhere, It's

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Speaker 3: not even like when they're after they're legal, then you

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Speaker 3: have weddings, and then you have they have babies. Of course,

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Speaker 3: don't you all want to be in the room together

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Speaker 3: and celebrate and have fun and not let that take

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Speaker 3: the air out of the room, you know.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I'm a little older than you, so I

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Speaker 1: will just say, I'm very proud of you, thank you,

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Speaker 1: well done, thank you. I'm sure I hope you're very

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Speaker 1: proud of yourself, because it's not easy.

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Speaker 2: I am proud of it.

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Speaker 3: I am very I'm very proud of what the work

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Speaker 3: that I think we've all put into it. Yeah, and

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Speaker 3: we truly are like a team. And I like to

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Speaker 3: talk about it because I mean, I had one of

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Speaker 3: the worst divorces you could have, right, and so if

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Speaker 3: I could do it, other people could do it.

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Speaker 1: It's so inspiring. But you get a lot of people

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Speaker 1: sliding into your DMS about the whole time parents.

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Speaker 3: Yes, for sure, but I will say that I do

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Speaker 3: understand because I never want to be like soap boxy.

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Speaker 3: I do understand that there are a lot of circumstances,

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Speaker 3: of course, that you cannot because everybody has to be

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Speaker 3: on board, and everybody has to be willing to and

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Speaker 3: open to make this work. And if somebody is responsible

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Speaker 3: and to.

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Speaker 1: Listen, right, and I agree with you that our cases

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Speaker 1: where it's just not happened. Yeah all right, Well, miss Gina,

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Speaker 1: thank you so much for coming and talking about your

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Speaker 1: co parenting and talking about sweet Travis. We loved having

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Speaker 1: you here. Let's go have some fun.

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Speaker 2: Yeah right, and yeah take a billion pictures.

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Speaker 1: We are going to take it, starting with me and you.

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Speaker 1: But just to remind our listeners, you can find love again.

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Speaker 1: Are you dating but not having much success. We can help.

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Speaker 1: Call us or email us. All the infos in the

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Speaker 1: show notes, follow us on socials. Make sure to rate

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Speaker 1: and review the podcast I Do Part two, an iHeart

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Speaker 1: podcast where falling in love is the main objective. Thank

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Speaker 1: you Ms Gina.

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Speaker 3: Thanks Jen,