WEBVTT - “I WANT TO BE A SPACE PIRATE” 0:00:00.080 --> 0:00:02.400 Hello, Hey are you Hey? What's up? 0:00:02.400 --> 0:00:02.480 Man? 0:00:02.520 --> 0:00:07.760 What's your name? My name is James, James. What's going on? 0:00:07.840 --> 0:00:08.080 James? 0:00:08.119 --> 0:00:09.160 What you want to talk about today? 0:00:10.560 --> 0:00:13.000 Well, uh, there is one thing that I wanted to 0:00:13.000 --> 0:00:15.760 say to you specifically. Sure before I get into talking 0:00:15.760 --> 0:00:16.439 about what I want to. 0:00:16.560 --> 0:00:18.520 About, I'm a little nervous. What's up? 0:00:19.120 --> 0:00:22.040 No, No, don't be nervous. I feel like you rag 0:00:22.120 --> 0:00:24.960 on yourself all the time for not being so knowledgeable 0:00:25.000 --> 0:00:28.760 about stuff. But I want you to realize that, you know, 0:00:28.880 --> 0:00:33.400 people don't really come to you to understand everything. I 0:00:33.400 --> 0:00:38.559 think what people really like about you and your channel 0:00:39.320 --> 0:00:42.080 is the fact that you have an interesting way of 0:00:42.120 --> 0:00:45.519 thinking about things, and you're very open and accepted that. 0:00:45.720 --> 0:00:49.000 Thank you. Man, that's incredibly sweety to say. 0:00:49.080 --> 0:00:53.040 Yeah, yeah, I just it really sucks whenever you rag 0:00:53.120 --> 0:00:56.680 on yourself. You know, sorry, you gotta forgive me. I'm 0:00:56.720 --> 0:00:57.400 kind of nervous. 0:00:57.560 --> 0:01:00.480 No, you're making me, you're making me tear up and yours. 0:01:00.600 --> 0:01:04.680 It's a serious, serious, sweet guy, James, appreciate that. I 0:01:04.720 --> 0:01:09.840 appreciate that. Uh, Well, this is this is well, this 0:01:10.000 --> 0:01:13.959 is nice. Well ship. Well, thanks, thanks, I'm trying my best. 0:01:13.959 --> 0:01:17.840 I'm trying my best Yeah, it's hard. It's like, it's 0:01:17.840 --> 0:01:22.240 a difficult So I'd not say I feel like a 0:01:22.280 --> 0:01:27.000 fucking uh pussy sometimes, but it's a difficult. It feels 0:01:27.000 --> 0:01:29.800 like a very difficult show to do, and I'm trying 0:01:29.959 --> 0:01:33.240 my best. So thanks man. Well what's what's what's up 0:01:33.280 --> 0:01:34.679 with you, James? What else is going on? 0:01:36.440 --> 0:01:37.880 Uh? 0:01:37.200 --> 0:01:37.320 Uh? 0:01:38.000 --> 0:01:41.360 Well, I actually got out of a six and a 0:01:41.400 --> 0:01:44.520 half year relationship not too long ago, a couple of 0:01:44.560 --> 0:01:50.280 months ago, and it did suck at the time, but 0:01:50.400 --> 0:01:53.560 I feel like I was able to find peace relatively quickly, 0:01:54.440 --> 0:01:57.560 and I think you're sharing that might help people who 0:01:57.640 --> 0:02:00.360 are going through similar situations. Yeah. 0:02:00.480 --> 0:02:03.560 Yeah, So you were with this lady for six years 0:02:03.560 --> 0:02:05.080 and then when when did you guys break up? 0:02:07.040 --> 0:02:09.560 We broke up in March earlier this year. 0:02:10.600 --> 0:02:12.840 And what was it that helped helped you gain peace? 0:02:14.520 --> 0:02:17.640 Well, the thing that honestly really helped me gain peace 0:02:17.840 --> 0:02:21.040 was just coming to accept the fact that a lot 0:02:21.080 --> 0:02:23.120 of the things that she broke up with me over 0:02:23.880 --> 0:02:27.720 were definitely issues in the past. But I looked at 0:02:27.760 --> 0:02:32.440 myself as a completely different person than, you know, the 0:02:33.520 --> 0:02:35.360 guy who made a lot of the mistakes that I 0:02:35.360 --> 0:02:37.040 had in the past. A lot of the issues that 0:02:37.080 --> 0:02:40.880 she cited were you know, years old at the time, 0:02:41.040 --> 0:02:45.919 and I definitely had made progress to being the person 0:02:45.960 --> 0:02:49.160 that I wanted to be, yeah, and definitely a better 0:02:49.200 --> 0:02:52.960 partner to her. But I realized that, you know, even 0:02:53.000 --> 0:02:55.720 though that I felt as if I was worthy for 0:02:55.720 --> 0:03:00.359 forgiveness of the past, she didn't necessarily owe it today. 0:03:01.240 --> 0:03:02.400 Yeah, yeah, yeah, totally. 0:03:03.720 --> 0:03:09.480 And just realizing that I had made progress from you know, 0:03:10.440 --> 0:03:14.120 being somebody who I didn't really like and becoming a 0:03:14.320 --> 0:03:18.880 better father and a better, better partner overall, just a 0:03:18.919 --> 0:03:22.800 better person, really stepping up and providing. I realized that, 0:03:23.120 --> 0:03:25.280 you know, my history is always going to be a 0:03:25.280 --> 0:03:28.640 part of me, for sure, and some people may dislike it, 0:03:28.760 --> 0:03:31.359 some people may be okay with it, not really care. 0:03:31.440 --> 0:03:34.520 But the thing is, as long as you're progressing, you 0:03:34.600 --> 0:03:39.640 gotta you gotta appreciate that. You gotta You can't you 0:03:39.680 --> 0:03:44.520 can't derive happiness from, you know, things that you expect 0:03:44.520 --> 0:03:47.040 to come out of life, only what progress you've been 0:03:47.080 --> 0:03:49.280 able to make in the time that you're doing you know. 0:03:49.440 --> 0:03:54.120 Yeah, yeah, totally. Yeah, you sound like you've been You've 0:03:54.960 --> 0:04:00.280 really been thinking a lot about uh, your life either 0:04:00.480 --> 0:04:03.400 with a therapist or with your just in your brain. 0:04:06.040 --> 0:04:07.760 Yeah, I haven't ever talked to a therapist. 0:04:08.560 --> 0:04:11.400 Well, you seem like you've been you you're you know 0:04:11.480 --> 0:04:13.840 that what who the who's fucking quote is it? It's 0:04:13.880 --> 0:04:17.720 like someone of the guy in one of those fucking 0:04:17.839 --> 0:04:21.400 old Greek god They were like, uh, something about the 0:04:21.520 --> 0:04:24.800 unexamined life. You sound like you've you've been examining your 0:04:24.839 --> 0:04:30.040 life a lot recently, coming to some of the conclusions. 0:04:30.520 --> 0:04:32.640 I knew that all the time. I feel like I'm 0:04:32.680 --> 0:04:35.520 a very holy analytical person, honestly. 0:04:36.160 --> 0:04:39.960 Yeah, So, how can I hold you are? 0:04:42.000 --> 0:04:46.479 I'm twenty three and you have a kid? Yeah? 0:04:46.520 --> 0:04:48.240 Has he? How has your kid doing? 0:04:49.600 --> 0:04:54.000 Oh? She's probably the happiest two year old I know 0:04:54.680 --> 0:05:00.680 any Like everybody's talks about terrible twos, but on she's 0:05:00.880 --> 0:05:05.520 just like always happy and playful, and she only cries 0:05:05.600 --> 0:05:11.119 like maybe once a week. You know, sometimes she throws 0:05:11.120 --> 0:05:13.039 a little bit of temper tantrums, But I feel like 0:05:13.080 --> 0:05:15.480 it's very easy to calm her down too, because you 0:05:15.600 --> 0:05:18.360 just got to sit down and talk to her, look 0:05:18.400 --> 0:05:20.679 her in the base and make her feel like she's 0:05:20.839 --> 0:05:22.760 being hurt and what she wants. 0:05:23.800 --> 0:05:26.840 Has it? Has it? Been are you is? And did 0:05:26.880 --> 0:05:30.200 you have this kid with the girlfriend that you were 0:05:30.200 --> 0:05:30.719 talking about? 0:05:32.120 --> 0:05:36.200 Yeah, so we were high school sweethearts, got out of 0:05:36.240 --> 0:05:41.520 high school. We were together for about four years when 0:05:42.000 --> 0:05:43.960 she got pregnant, three and a half years or so 0:05:44.120 --> 0:05:49.480 when my ex got pregnant, and you know, we had 0:05:49.480 --> 0:05:56.039 the kid. And then after having after my daughter was 0:05:56.040 --> 0:05:58.400 about one years old, is when you broke things? All? 0:06:00.200 --> 0:06:03.320 Has it? How has it been? Has it been sharing 0:06:03.320 --> 0:06:04.520 custody and all that stuff? 0:06:06.360 --> 0:06:08.800 You know, it's actually been. That was something that I 0:06:08.839 --> 0:06:12.080 was really nervous about because I I feel like she's 0:06:12.160 --> 0:06:14.640 somewhat of a vindictive person. I thought she would have 0:06:14.720 --> 0:06:18.440 tried a lot harder to use my child against me, 0:06:18.760 --> 0:06:22.040 you know, but she honestly has been very cooperative about 0:06:22.040 --> 0:06:24.800 the whole thing. We've had some differences and what we 0:06:24.839 --> 0:06:28.039 want to do with ever release sometimes, but you know, 0:06:29.880 --> 0:06:35.279 we sorry that's my daughter's name, by the way, But 0:06:35.960 --> 0:06:38.719 you know, honestly, it hasn't been the worst. We've been 0:06:38.760 --> 0:06:41.320 able to stay out of court for most things. You know, 0:06:41.480 --> 0:06:45.280 I'm making child support payments and everything like that, keeping 0:06:45.320 --> 0:06:47.760 it all documented and everything. But outside of that, we 0:06:47.800 --> 0:06:52.560 can usually come to an agreement about most things. 0:06:50.800 --> 0:06:56.160 M What do you do for work? Oh? 0:06:56.279 --> 0:06:59.360 I do paintless dent repair. I'm actually at my job 0:06:59.440 --> 0:07:03.120 right now. I just I take dents out of cars 0:07:03.160 --> 0:07:06.280 without needing to repaint them, basically just massage the metal 0:07:06.320 --> 0:07:10.119 back into place. Mm hmm, and uh get paid pretty 0:07:10.160 --> 0:07:10.840 damn well too. 0:07:12.440 --> 0:07:16.440 Do you do you do you feel peaceful. 0:07:19.080 --> 0:07:19.840 Like at my job? 0:07:20.560 --> 0:07:21.440 It's in general? 0:07:23.120 --> 0:07:25.720 Yeah, I do, honestly. Now I'm nervous. 0:07:25.960 --> 0:07:28.200 You know what? What? What? What made? 0:07:28.200 --> 0:07:28.320 What? 0:07:28.400 --> 0:07:30.280 In general? Makes you feel peaceful? 0:07:32.240 --> 0:07:37.640 I just honestly feel like I I have hope for 0:07:37.680 --> 0:07:40.800 the future, and I can also look at where I 0:07:40.840 --> 0:07:43.600 have been at in the past and the fact that 0:07:43.680 --> 0:07:45.400 there were so many rough things that I had to 0:07:45.440 --> 0:07:47.840 push through to get to where I am now, so 0:07:47.840 --> 0:07:51.200 where it doesn't really matter what's coming in the future. 0:07:51.400 --> 0:07:53.440 I just know that I will be able to handle 0:07:53.480 --> 0:07:59.720 her to the most, you know, like I had who 0:07:59.800 --> 0:08:02.080 I'm like, I've given too much information about myself. I 0:08:02.120 --> 0:08:03.680 don't know if I want to delve too deep into 0:08:03.680 --> 0:08:09.120 the past. Whatever you want, man, Yeah, well, I've gotten 0:08:09.160 --> 0:08:12.000 over a lot of addictions in the past. I used 0:08:12.040 --> 0:08:15.720 to be addicted to pretty much, you know, anything I 0:08:15.720 --> 0:08:19.040 could get my hands onto cut all that out. When 0:08:19.080 --> 0:08:24.760 I learned my ex was pregnant, there was just you know, 0:08:24.880 --> 0:08:27.920 I also started a business a while back doing paintless. 0:08:27.920 --> 0:08:31.120 Didn't repair, and I was able to buy a house 0:08:31.160 --> 0:08:34.599 at twenty one. Cool gone now of course, because we 0:08:34.679 --> 0:08:40.520 broke up. You know, I just feel like I've been 0:08:40.559 --> 0:08:43.679 through quite a bit and I've always come out, you know, 0:08:44.040 --> 0:08:47.559 in a relatively better spot. So I just don't have 0:08:47.640 --> 0:08:51.920 to really worry about what's coming, just knowing that I 0:08:51.960 --> 0:08:54.360 can be confident in my abilities to take care of it. 0:08:55.600 --> 0:08:55.840 You know. 0:08:55.920 --> 0:09:00.559 It's so interesting because I'm constantly, just to guess, relate 0:09:00.600 --> 0:09:03.080 to you in some way. I feel like I'm I'm 0:09:03.160 --> 0:09:10.240 constantly uh searching after a sense of security in in 0:09:10.320 --> 0:09:14.360 my life, and I think I'm always well, it's like 0:09:14.480 --> 0:09:16.640 I talk so much because I only because I think 0:09:16.679 --> 0:09:18.840 about it so much about how how much of life 0:09:18.880 --> 0:09:21.240 is kind of internal versus external, And I think I 0:09:21.320 --> 0:09:25.760 search for a lot of my security externally, and I 0:09:25.800 --> 0:09:29.760 find a lot of security and external things. But what 0:09:29.880 --> 0:09:34.359 you're talking about just the this this like the security 0:09:35.040 --> 0:09:41.000 in this innate belief that you have you know exactly 0:09:41.080 --> 0:09:44.880 who you are and what you're capable of and what 0:09:44.920 --> 0:09:48.959 you can withstand and and like that, nobody can ever 0:09:49.000 --> 0:09:52.680 take that away from you. Is it really is a 0:09:52.720 --> 0:09:58.040 powerful form of of internal security that can that can 0:09:58.080 --> 0:10:03.760 even over a lot of things we try to find 0:10:04.080 --> 0:10:09.439 external security in, like like relationships or things like that, 0:10:09.880 --> 0:10:12.400 because it's you know, it's it's crazy, because a lot 0:10:12.400 --> 0:10:13.760 of that stuff is out of our control. But that 0:10:13.840 --> 0:10:17.520 doesn't mean we want to negate its existence and ignore 0:10:17.520 --> 0:10:20.520 it and be fucking you know, monks and whatever. 0:10:21.120 --> 0:10:25.400 Uh oh, But that that is a modern development for 0:10:25.480 --> 0:10:28.440 me as well, like very recent development for me as well. 0:10:28.480 --> 0:10:31.400 Because I was doing that, I was pulling a lot 0:10:31.440 --> 0:10:34.359 of you know, peace of mind out of my relationship. 0:10:34.400 --> 0:10:37.280 Because we were together for six years, we had been 0:10:37.320 --> 0:10:41.320 through a lot, so I thought everything was completely unshakeable 0:10:41.679 --> 0:10:45.760 in terms of that, and instead of seeing me as myself, 0:10:45.840 --> 0:10:49.240 I kind of saw myself as a partner, you know, 0:10:49.480 --> 0:10:52.520 or a provider, a father. And I was pulling a 0:10:52.520 --> 0:10:55.960 lot of my piece out of being a part of 0:10:57.800 --> 0:11:00.360 everything that I was involved in rather than who I 0:11:00.520 --> 0:11:03.960 was as a person. You know, it was my relationships 0:11:03.960 --> 0:11:07.240 and the thing that I had accomplished, right, rather than 0:11:07.600 --> 0:11:10.800 that I can't accomplish and knowing what struggles I have 0:11:10.920 --> 0:11:13.200 been through to become a better person. 0:11:14.080 --> 0:11:19.720 Right, well, it's so fucking weird, man, because I think 0:11:19.800 --> 0:11:25.240 that there's uh, there's like there's gotta be some balance 0:11:25.360 --> 0:11:28.200 or some place on a spectrum, because I do think 0:11:28.200 --> 0:11:32.680 it's important to really like have other people that you 0:11:33.240 --> 0:11:35.040 care about and that are part of your I mean, 0:11:35.040 --> 0:11:37.760 that's I guess what's nice about being a dad, it seems, 0:11:38.280 --> 0:11:41.440 is that you have this other person that you like, 0:11:42.040 --> 0:11:45.079 you have you have something that's not just yourself to 0:11:45.600 --> 0:11:49.880 really really really strongly care about and that like needs you. 0:11:54.160 --> 0:11:57.600 It's just for certain, for certain, especially because you know, 0:11:58.000 --> 0:12:01.319 after and it happened, I'm quit my job and I 0:12:01.720 --> 0:12:03.760 was in a different state at the time that we 0:12:03.920 --> 0:12:06.360 broke up. She just poke up with me over text, 0:12:06.440 --> 0:12:11.120 which is kind of crazy after six years. But regardless, 0:12:12.080 --> 0:12:14.800 I almost just quit my job right then, drove the 0:12:15.120 --> 0:12:18.880 five hours home and just try to fix things, and 0:12:19.559 --> 0:12:22.920 you know that didn't work out. I didn't do that. 0:12:23.160 --> 0:12:26.200 So having my daughter there really also kept it in 0:12:26.240 --> 0:12:27.920 the back of my mind that I need to keep 0:12:27.920 --> 0:12:30.439 this job. I need to dig through, you know, and 0:12:30.840 --> 0:12:33.200 also I need to push past my feelings and not 0:12:33.280 --> 0:12:36.400 just feel down like I have a reason that I 0:12:36.600 --> 0:12:39.719 need to keep on going. I can't just walk and 0:12:40.200 --> 0:12:41.920 quit out on my Well. 0:12:41.880 --> 0:12:46.720 Yeah, yeah, so you said, well, I'm so happy to 0:12:46.760 --> 0:12:51.600 hear that you've been able to build a really strong 0:12:51.960 --> 0:12:58.360 sense of like internal confidence. That's that's not easy to 0:12:58.440 --> 0:13:03.040 do and it's important. So I'm glad to hear you 0:13:03.040 --> 0:13:06.040 were able to do it. What, uh, what do you 0:13:06.040 --> 0:13:08.880 want to do with that internal confidence? What's the next 0:13:09.240 --> 0:13:10.320 in your life? King? 0:13:12.520 --> 0:13:18.120 Uh? You're asking me, like, what my long term goals are? Yes, yeah, 0:13:18.160 --> 0:13:24.439 I have like, okay, I have realistic, I have ridiculous, 0:13:24.480 --> 0:13:26.280 and I have somewhat in the middle of what do 0:13:26.400 --> 0:13:27.920 What do you want? Birds? Uh? 0:13:28.240 --> 0:13:32.240 You have realistic ridiculous, and so let's start with ridiculous. 0:13:32.320 --> 0:13:35.240 Let's why only go from ridiculous and work our way 0:13:35.280 --> 0:13:36.199 back to earth. 0:13:38.240 --> 0:13:41.959 Ridiculous. This is definitely people are going to know exactly 0:13:41.960 --> 0:13:44.719 who I am after I say this, But. 0:13:45.160 --> 0:13:48.360 Why are you? Are you scud? Let's let you talk. 0:13:49.440 --> 0:13:52.440 I tell everybody this, But I really want to be 0:13:52.600 --> 0:13:58.199 a space pirate. I want to I want to Uh, 0:13:58.400 --> 0:14:01.960 I really want to study electrical engineering and aerospace engineering 0:14:02.040 --> 0:14:07.240 to create maybe a a better type of electrostatic propulsion 0:14:07.320 --> 0:14:12.720 system or you know, a massless reaction system for spacecraft. 0:14:13.040 --> 0:14:15.440 And if I can do that, I'm going to retire 0:14:15.600 --> 0:14:17.960 and I'm just going to be a pirate out in 0:14:18.080 --> 0:14:21.720 space stealing minerals and ship from SpaceX. But I know 0:14:21.800 --> 0:14:24.600 that's ridiculous. I'm still going to try it, try for it. 0:14:25.280 --> 0:14:30.400 But yeah, the somewhat in the middle of that is 0:14:30.440 --> 0:14:33.280 I definitely am going to work on getting my degree 0:14:33.320 --> 0:14:36.680 in aerospace and electrical engineering. I want a duel major 0:14:36.720 --> 0:14:39.840 on that. I think that would be sweet, and potentially 0:14:39.880 --> 0:14:43.240 get a job for NASA or you know, maybe Boeing 0:14:43.360 --> 0:14:50.080 or someplace like that, maybe even SpaceX. And then realistically, 0:14:50.960 --> 0:14:55.480 what I am working on right now is I'm investing 0:14:55.520 --> 0:14:59.400 a lot of money into tax leans so that eventually 0:14:59.560 --> 0:15:07.000 I can, eventually I can house much of the homeless 0:15:07.000 --> 0:15:10.000 population in Atlanta. I would really love to do that. 0:15:10.280 --> 0:15:13.480 Well, how's what do you mean? How's how tell them? 0:15:13.520 --> 0:15:15.200 How does that work? What does a tax lian? 0:15:16.760 --> 0:15:19.840 Oh? Okay, so if you don't pay your property taxes, 0:15:20.120 --> 0:15:24.120 the government of your county wherever you wherever you're at, 0:15:24.360 --> 0:15:27.120 they auction them off in a tax lean sale. Or 0:15:27.240 --> 0:15:30.320 sometimes it's a tax d depending on what state you're in. 0:15:31.320 --> 0:15:34.760 You go to the courthouse, you bid on them, and 0:15:34.920 --> 0:15:38.760 you either get the house after a year, or you 0:15:38.800 --> 0:15:42.560 get your money back plus twenty percent. You know, So 0:15:42.640 --> 0:15:45.960 maybe let's say that, Yeah, let's say that this house 0:15:46.040 --> 0:15:49.800 is like two hundred thousand dollars, right, they have back 0:15:49.880 --> 0:15:52.480 taxes on it of ten thousand dollars. You go in, 0:15:52.640 --> 0:15:56.520 you bid on the back taxes or twelve thousand. Well, 0:15:56.560 --> 0:15:58.600 you're gonna get all of your twelve thousand back and 0:15:58.680 --> 0:16:01.960 you're gonna get twenty percent on the you know, ten 0:16:02.000 --> 0:16:04.480 thousand of the back tax, so you get an extra 0:16:04.520 --> 0:16:06.880 two thousand out of that. Or if they don't pay 0:16:07.280 --> 0:16:11.080 you get the house. You get all of the entire 0:16:11.160 --> 0:16:12.120 equity of the house. 0:16:12.920 --> 0:16:15.640 So you're how are you hoping to use this to 0:16:16.040 --> 0:16:17.680 how's the homeless population? 0:16:19.160 --> 0:16:23.040 I really want to buy a large plot of land 0:16:23.600 --> 0:16:27.480 and start using sustainable building methods like rammed earth and 0:16:30.200 --> 0:16:34.000 just to you know, create lots of apartments and use 0:16:34.080 --> 0:16:37.080 the homeless people themselves, hire them on and teach them 0:16:37.120 --> 0:16:40.040 the skills to build these houses. Start a company that 0:16:40.320 --> 0:16:43.680 you know employs a lot of them, just so that 0:16:43.760 --> 0:16:46.720 I can continue to build houses, sell them or use 0:16:46.760 --> 0:16:50.960 them to house the you know, homeless population here in 0:16:51.000 --> 0:16:55.640 Atlanta and just kind of take care of the problem 0:16:55.680 --> 0:16:56.080 that way. 0:16:57.600 --> 0:17:00.600 Cool man is that? Yeah, No, it's it's a cool 0:17:00.600 --> 0:17:03.560 it's a cool idea. That's a cool idea. Well, Matt, 0:17:03.600 --> 0:17:06.639 you listen. You sound like you got you sound like 0:17:06.680 --> 0:17:08.960 you're doing all right. Well, if I had to rank 0:17:09.080 --> 0:17:11.879 the if I if I had to rank you on 0:17:11.960 --> 0:17:15.159 a scale from like most depressed person I've heard on 0:17:15.200 --> 0:17:17.840 the show to least depressed person I've heard on the show, 0:17:17.960 --> 0:17:22.320 myself included myself very much included. I would I would 0:17:22.359 --> 0:17:25.240 put you on the lower end of that spectrum, which 0:17:26.359 --> 0:17:27.919 I hope, I hope you're proud of. 0:17:30.000 --> 0:17:31.760 Thank you. I do appreciate that. 0:17:33.800 --> 0:17:34.800 Go ahead, go ahead. 0:17:36.160 --> 0:17:39.000 Can I ask you like, has my voice sounded like 0:17:39.160 --> 0:17:41.040 shaky and nervous this entire time? 0:17:41.960 --> 0:17:45.399 I want it? Really truly, hasn't? I've it? 0:17:45.760 --> 0:17:46.080 Really? 0:17:46.119 --> 0:17:51.000 You sound you sound quite confident. Actually you sound uh, 0:17:51.400 --> 0:17:54.679 I like your voice not to be you know, weird, 0:17:54.760 --> 0:17:56.600 but you know you have a you have a nice voice. 0:17:58.520 --> 0:18:02.359 Thank you, I do appreciate it. And yeah, thanks thanks 0:18:02.359 --> 0:18:04.720 to being in front of so many people. 0:18:04.640 --> 0:18:06.760 No, you were, you were, you were great man. I 0:18:06.800 --> 0:18:08.639 and thank you again for the kind of words he 0:18:08.680 --> 0:18:12.639 said at the beginning. They really were. We're sweeten and mental. 0:18:12.400 --> 0:18:17.359 Lot, oh absolutely, and Lyle, you have millions of people 0:18:17.400 --> 0:18:18.040 who watch. 0:18:18.440 --> 0:18:21.200 A million who knows, who knows? 0:18:21.720 --> 0:18:26.240 They all come for they all come for a reason, man, 0:18:26.359 --> 0:18:29.240 like you're just a likable person and you have such 0:18:29.280 --> 0:18:31.520 a great way of thinking, like you gotta stop ragging 0:18:31.560 --> 0:18:32.400 on yourself so long. 0:18:32.520 --> 0:18:35.080 Thanks Thanks man. I'm gonna I'll try not to. I'm 0:18:35.080 --> 0:18:37.600 gonna try. I keep saying, I'm gonna try to hate 0:18:37.600 --> 0:18:43.240 myself only the I think there's an optimal amount of 0:18:42.920 --> 0:18:45.800 of hating yourself, and I'm trying to get there. I 0:18:45.800 --> 0:18:47.520 think it's probably on the lower end of what I 0:18:47.560 --> 0:18:51.159 currently do now, and I'm gonna try to try to 0:18:51.200 --> 0:18:51.560 get there. 0:18:53.400 --> 0:18:56.040 I don't think you gotto. I think you gotta. I 0:18:56.040 --> 0:18:57.719 think you got to hate the fact that there are 0:18:57.800 --> 0:19:02.919 goals that you haven't yet accomplished, but not yourself in 0:19:03.000 --> 0:19:05.200 the fact that you have accomplished, but hate the fact 0:19:05.240 --> 0:19:07.719 that the parents has that you haven't done. 0:19:07.880 --> 0:19:09.760 You're You're a good You're a good guy, James. I 0:19:09.920 --> 0:19:12.119 I'm I I have a lot of respect for you. 0:19:13.400 --> 0:19:15.919 Well, thank you. I appreciate that you have a good 0:19:15.920 --> 0:19:19.040 rest of the nam and take care you two law. 0:19:20.480 --> 0:19:22.600 That was that was nice. That was a nice gentleman. 0:19:23.760 --> 0:19:26.160 I'm trying to think if I have any post call 0:19:27.000 --> 0:19:36.800 thoughts on that. Uh yeah, that guy, that guy was cool. 0:19:37.200 --> 0:19:38.960 What did he say? He said what he said at 0:19:38.960 --> 0:19:42.040 the beginning to me, that was really nice that I'm 0:19:42.080 --> 0:19:45.280 trying not to. I don't have to understand everything. I 0:19:45.320 --> 0:19:47.840 don't know. I don't know what I'm I don't really 0:19:47.920 --> 0:19:51.679 know what I'm doing anymore. I don't really know. And 0:19:51.760 --> 0:19:58.080 I maybe that's I should shouldn't be so open about that, 0:19:58.720 --> 0:20:02.560 but I but I do. I wonder, I wonder sometimes, 0:20:02.760 --> 0:20:07.719 But I also whatever, it's fine. I'm gonna eventually close. 0:20:07.920 --> 0:20:11.200 I'm gonna eventually close my laptop and I'm gonna go outside. 0:20:11.240 --> 0:20:14.200 I'm gonna go for a walk and there'll be It'll 0:20:14.200 --> 0:20:18.280 be like I never was it ever? Anything? Is that crazy? 0:20:18.560 --> 0:20:21.400 Do I sound crazy? Right now? Let's keep going, Let's 0:20:21.480 --> 0:20:28.199 keep taking calls. Hello, Hello, Hi, Hey, do me a 0:20:28.240 --> 0:20:30.240 quick favor. Can you can you take me off of 0:20:30.320 --> 0:20:33.680 speakerphone and turn off your stream? 0:20:34.040 --> 0:20:35.120 You're not on speaker. 0:20:35.160 --> 0:20:39.440 But I'm at a concert right now. Is this level 0:20:39.440 --> 0:20:41.280 of volume like background noise acceptable? 0:20:41.800 --> 0:20:42.000 Wait? 0:20:42.040 --> 0:20:44.080 Why are you? Why are you calling me from a concert? 0:20:45.840 --> 0:20:47.240 Because I'm waiting to go on. 0:20:47.520 --> 0:20:50.960 It's a it's a like a classical music kind of concert. 0:20:51.080 --> 0:20:52.439 So we're just waiting around to go on. 0:20:53.119 --> 0:20:57.480 Oh okay, Oh I see you're performing in this concert? 0:20:59.240 --> 0:20:59.480 Yeah? 0:20:59.520 --> 0:21:00.000 Wait a seton? 0:21:00.280 --> 0:21:01.000 Is this liles? 0:21:01.160 --> 0:21:01.600 Like for real? 0:21:01.640 --> 0:21:03.080 This isn't This isn't a screener? 0:21:03.480 --> 0:21:08.600 What do you do? What are you performing in the concert? 0:21:08.760 --> 0:21:12.680 Well, we're playing with a jazz clarinetta's named Duren Ketchens 0:21:13.560 --> 0:21:17.119 and we're playing uh House of the Rising Sun, What 0:21:17.200 --> 0:21:20.800 a Wonderful World on a couple other tunes, and I'm 0:21:20.800 --> 0:21:21.880 playing the bassoon. 0:21:23.160 --> 0:21:29.240 That's cool. M hmm, what are you excited? Wait? I 0:21:29.280 --> 0:21:31.199 have so cure? Why do you? Why are you calling me? 0:21:31.280 --> 0:21:33.080 This seems like something you'd want to like be in 0:21:33.119 --> 0:21:36.200 the moment of Like I feel like most people call 0:21:36.280 --> 0:21:38.520 me when they're like kind of bored, Like would you? 0:21:38.600 --> 0:21:41.840 Are you not? Would What made you want to call 0:21:41.880 --> 0:21:42.840 me in the middle of all this? 0:21:45.080 --> 0:21:48.800 I'm not doing much. Everyone really has their own friends. 0:21:48.840 --> 0:21:52.320 But I saw that you were taking calls. So I 0:21:52.359 --> 0:21:54.200 decided to take a chance, and I didn't think i'd 0:21:54.200 --> 0:21:54.639 get this far. 0:21:57.119 --> 0:21:59.159 Oh wow, Well, how long have you been playing the 0:21:59.240 --> 0:21:59.840 bassoon for? 0:22:00.119 --> 0:22:04.960 Or about ten years? A little less than ten years? 0:22:05.160 --> 0:22:07.919 Oh geez, what are you in like school for that 0:22:08.160 --> 0:22:09.280 or what what are you doing? 0:22:10.800 --> 0:22:10.960 Yeah? 0:22:11.000 --> 0:22:12.120 I'm in college for it. 0:22:13.320 --> 0:22:18.000 Wow, you said every you said everyone has there for 0:22:18.040 --> 0:22:20.119 you don't have any friends in the in the in 0:22:20.160 --> 0:22:21.080 the thing that you're doing. 0:22:22.880 --> 0:22:25.360 I have some friends, but they have friends, so they're 0:22:25.400 --> 0:22:28.000 talking to their friends and I'm just sitting here waiting. 0:22:28.359 --> 0:22:30.639 Why didn't you beat Why don't you go be friends 0:22:30.640 --> 0:22:31.680 with your friends friends? 0:22:34.440 --> 0:22:38.280 I struggle to socialize. I'm working on it. 0:22:39.119 --> 0:22:40.520 Okay, a couple of. 0:22:40.400 --> 0:22:42.520 My my friends are actually in the audience. 0:22:43.720 --> 0:22:44.679 What the wind do you go on? 0:22:47.760 --> 0:22:51.360 Probably in like I don't know, five ish minutes, maybe 0:22:51.480 --> 0:22:52.960 maybe ten between five and son. 0:22:53.720 --> 0:22:57.760 What I'm cure? What is a basoon? What is a bassoon? 0:23:00.040 --> 0:23:05.600 It's a large woodwind instrument that uses a read It's 0:23:05.640 --> 0:23:09.080 like four feet tall. If you google it'll it'll come up. 0:23:11.960 --> 0:23:15.639 Okay, so you play the bassoon, you're about to go 0:23:15.680 --> 0:23:19.720 with your the opening for someone? 0:23:22.720 --> 0:23:23.280