1
00:00:00,080 --> 00:00:02,400
Speaker 1: Hello, Hey are you Hey? What's up?

2
00:00:02,400 --> 00:00:02,480
Speaker 2: Man?

3
00:00:02,520 --> 00:00:07,760
Speaker 1: What's your name? My name is James, James. What's going on?

4
00:00:07,840 --> 00:00:08,080
Speaker 3: James?

5
00:00:08,119 --> 00:00:09,160
Speaker 1: What you want to talk about today?

6
00:00:10,560 --> 00:00:13,000
Speaker 3: Well, uh, there is one thing that I wanted to

7
00:00:13,000 --> 00:00:15,760
Speaker 3: say to you specifically. Sure before I get into talking

8
00:00:15,760 --> 00:00:16,439
Speaker 3: about what I want to.

9
00:00:16,560 --> 00:00:18,520
Speaker 1: About, I'm a little nervous. What's up?

10
00:00:19,120 --> 00:00:22,040
Speaker 3: No, No, don't be nervous. I feel like you rag

11
00:00:22,120 --> 00:00:24,960
Speaker 3: on yourself all the time for not being so knowledgeable

12
00:00:25,000 --> 00:00:28,760
Speaker 3: about stuff. But I want you to realize that, you know,

13
00:00:28,880 --> 00:00:33,400
Speaker 3: people don't really come to you to understand everything. I

14
00:00:33,400 --> 00:00:38,559
Speaker 3: think what people really like about you and your channel

15
00:00:39,320 --> 00:00:42,080
Speaker 3: is the fact that you have an interesting way of

16
00:00:42,120 --> 00:00:45,519
Speaker 3: thinking about things, and you're very open and accepted that.

17
00:00:45,720 --> 00:00:49,000
Speaker 1: Thank you. Man, that's incredibly sweety to say.

18
00:00:49,080 --> 00:00:53,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I just it really sucks whenever you rag

19
00:00:53,120 --> 00:00:56,680
Speaker 3: on yourself. You know, sorry, you gotta forgive me. I'm

20
00:00:56,720 --> 00:00:57,400
Speaker 3: kind of nervous.

21
00:00:57,560 --> 00:01:00,480
Speaker 1: No, you're making me, you're making me tear up and yours.

22
00:01:00,600 --> 00:01:04,680
Speaker 1: It's a serious, serious, sweet guy, James, appreciate that. I

23
00:01:04,720 --> 00:01:09,840
Speaker 1: appreciate that. Uh, Well, this is this is well, this

24
00:01:10,000 --> 00:01:13,959
Speaker 1: is nice. Well ship. Well, thanks, thanks, I'm trying my best.

25
00:01:13,959 --> 00:01:17,840
Speaker 1: I'm trying my best Yeah, it's hard. It's like, it's

26
00:01:17,840 --> 00:01:22,240
Speaker 1: a difficult So I'd not say I feel like a

27
00:01:22,280 --> 00:01:27,000
Speaker 1: fucking uh pussy sometimes, but it's a difficult. It feels

28
00:01:27,000 --> 00:01:29,800
Speaker 1: like a very difficult show to do, and I'm trying

29
00:01:29,959 --> 00:01:33,240
Speaker 1: my best. So thanks man. Well what's what's what's up

30
00:01:33,280 --> 00:01:34,679
Speaker 1: with you, James? What else is going on?

31
00:01:36,440 --> 00:01:37,880
Speaker 3: Uh?

32
00:01:37,200 --> 00:01:37,320
Speaker 2: Uh?

33
00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:41,360
Speaker 3: Well, I actually got out of a six and a

34
00:01:41,400 --> 00:01:44,520
Speaker 3: half year relationship not too long ago, a couple of

35
00:01:44,560 --> 00:01:50,280
Speaker 3: months ago, and it did suck at the time, but

36
00:01:50,400 --> 00:01:53,560
Speaker 3: I feel like I was able to find peace relatively quickly,

37
00:01:54,440 --> 00:01:57,560
Speaker 3: and I think you're sharing that might help people who

38
00:01:57,640 --> 00:02:00,360
Speaker 3: are going through similar situations. Yeah.

39
00:02:00,480 --> 00:02:03,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, So you were with this lady for six years

40
00:02:03,560 --> 00:02:05,080
Speaker 1: and then when when did you guys break up?

41
00:02:07,040 --> 00:02:09,560
Speaker 3: We broke up in March earlier this year.

42
00:02:10,600 --> 00:02:12,840
Speaker 1: And what was it that helped helped you gain peace?

43
00:02:14,520 --> 00:02:17,640
Speaker 3: Well, the thing that honestly really helped me gain peace

44
00:02:17,840 --> 00:02:21,040
Speaker 3: was just coming to accept the fact that a lot

45
00:02:21,080 --> 00:02:23,120
Speaker 3: of the things that she broke up with me over

46
00:02:23,880 --> 00:02:27,720
Speaker 3: were definitely issues in the past. But I looked at

47
00:02:27,760 --> 00:02:32,440
Speaker 3: myself as a completely different person than, you know, the

48
00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:35,360
Speaker 3: guy who made a lot of the mistakes that I

49
00:02:35,360 --> 00:02:37,040
Speaker 3: had in the past. A lot of the issues that

50
00:02:37,080 --> 00:02:40,880
Speaker 3: she cited were you know, years old at the time,

51
00:02:41,040 --> 00:02:45,919
Speaker 3: and I definitely had made progress to being the person

52
00:02:45,960 --> 00:02:49,160
Speaker 3: that I wanted to be, yeah, and definitely a better

53
00:02:49,200 --> 00:02:52,960
Speaker 3: partner to her. But I realized that, you know, even

54
00:02:53,000 --> 00:02:55,720
Speaker 3: though that I felt as if I was worthy for

55
00:02:55,720 --> 00:03:00,359
Speaker 3: forgiveness of the past, she didn't necessarily owe it today.

56
00:03:01,240 --> 00:03:02,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, totally.

57
00:03:03,720 --> 00:03:09,480
Speaker 3: And just realizing that I had made progress from you know,

58
00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:14,120
Speaker 3: being somebody who I didn't really like and becoming a

59
00:03:14,320 --> 00:03:18,880
Speaker 3: better father and a better, better partner overall, just a

60
00:03:18,919 --> 00:03:22,800
Speaker 3: better person, really stepping up and providing. I realized that,

61
00:03:23,120 --> 00:03:25,280
Speaker 3: you know, my history is always going to be a

62
00:03:25,280 --> 00:03:28,640
Speaker 3: part of me, for sure, and some people may dislike it,

63
00:03:28,760 --> 00:03:31,359
Speaker 3: some people may be okay with it, not really care.

64
00:03:31,440 --> 00:03:34,520
Speaker 3: But the thing is, as long as you're progressing, you

65
00:03:34,600 --> 00:03:39,640
Speaker 3: gotta you gotta appreciate that. You gotta You can't you

66
00:03:39,680 --> 00:03:44,520
Speaker 3: can't derive happiness from, you know, things that you expect

67
00:03:44,520 --> 00:03:47,040
Speaker 3: to come out of life, only what progress you've been

68
00:03:47,080 --> 00:03:49,280
Speaker 3: able to make in the time that you're doing you know.

69
00:03:49,440 --> 00:03:54,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, totally. Yeah, you sound like you've been You've

70
00:03:54,960 --> 00:04:00,280
Speaker 1: really been thinking a lot about uh, your life either

71
00:04:00,480 --> 00:04:03,400
Speaker 1: with a therapist or with your just in your brain.

72
00:04:06,040 --> 00:04:07,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, I haven't ever talked to a therapist.

73
00:04:08,560 --> 00:04:11,400
Speaker 1: Well, you seem like you've been you you're you know

74
00:04:11,480 --> 00:04:13,840
Speaker 1: that what who the who's fucking quote is it? It's

75
00:04:13,880 --> 00:04:17,720
Speaker 1: like someone of the guy in one of those fucking

76
00:04:17,839 --> 00:04:21,400
Speaker 1: old Greek god They were like, uh, something about the

77
00:04:21,520 --> 00:04:24,800
Speaker 1: unexamined life. You sound like you've you've been examining your

78
00:04:24,839 --> 00:04:30,040
Speaker 1: life a lot recently, coming to some of the conclusions.

79
00:04:30,520 --> 00:04:32,640
Speaker 3: I knew that all the time. I feel like I'm

80
00:04:32,680 --> 00:04:35,520
Speaker 3: a very holy analytical person, honestly.

81
00:04:36,160 --> 00:04:39,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, So, how can I hold you are?

82
00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:46,479
Speaker 3: I'm twenty three and you have a kid? Yeah?

83
00:04:46,520 --> 00:04:48,240
Speaker 1: Has he? How has your kid doing?

84
00:04:49,600 --> 00:04:54,000
Speaker 3: Oh? She's probably the happiest two year old I know

85
00:04:54,680 --> 00:05:00,680
Speaker 3: any Like everybody's talks about terrible twos, but on she's

86
00:05:00,880 --> 00:05:05,520
Speaker 3: just like always happy and playful, and she only cries

87
00:05:05,600 --> 00:05:11,119
Speaker 3: like maybe once a week. You know, sometimes she throws

88
00:05:11,120 --> 00:05:13,039
Speaker 3: a little bit of temper tantrums, But I feel like

89
00:05:13,080 --> 00:05:15,480
Speaker 3: it's very easy to calm her down too, because you

90
00:05:15,600 --> 00:05:18,360
Speaker 3: just got to sit down and talk to her, look

91
00:05:18,400 --> 00:05:20,679
Speaker 3: her in the base and make her feel like she's

92
00:05:20,839 --> 00:05:22,760
Speaker 3: being hurt and what she wants.

93
00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:26,840
Speaker 1: Has it? Has it? Been are you is? And did

94
00:05:26,880 --> 00:05:30,200
Speaker 1: you have this kid with the girlfriend that you were

95
00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:30,719
Speaker 1: talking about?

96
00:05:32,120 --> 00:05:36,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, so we were high school sweethearts, got out of

97
00:05:36,240 --> 00:05:41,520
Speaker 3: high school. We were together for about four years when

98
00:05:42,000 --> 00:05:43,960
Speaker 3: she got pregnant, three and a half years or so

99
00:05:44,120 --> 00:05:49,480
Speaker 3: when my ex got pregnant, and you know, we had

100
00:05:49,480 --> 00:05:56,039
Speaker 3: the kid. And then after having after my daughter was

101
00:05:56,040 --> 00:05:58,400
Speaker 3: about one years old, is when you broke things? All?

102
00:06:00,200 --> 00:06:03,320
Speaker 1: Has it? How has it been? Has it been sharing

103
00:06:03,320 --> 00:06:04,520
Speaker 1: custody and all that stuff?

104
00:06:06,360 --> 00:06:08,800
Speaker 3: You know, it's actually been. That was something that I

105
00:06:08,839 --> 00:06:12,080
Speaker 3: was really nervous about because I I feel like she's

106
00:06:12,160 --> 00:06:14,640
Speaker 3: somewhat of a vindictive person. I thought she would have

107
00:06:14,720 --> 00:06:18,440
Speaker 3: tried a lot harder to use my child against me,

108
00:06:18,760 --> 00:06:22,040
Speaker 3: you know, but she honestly has been very cooperative about

109
00:06:22,040 --> 00:06:24,800
Speaker 3: the whole thing. We've had some differences and what we

110
00:06:24,839 --> 00:06:28,039
Speaker 3: want to do with ever release sometimes, but you know,

111
00:06:29,880 --> 00:06:35,279
Speaker 3: we sorry that's my daughter's name, by the way, But

112
00:06:35,960 --> 00:06:38,719
Speaker 3: you know, honestly, it hasn't been the worst. We've been

113
00:06:38,760 --> 00:06:41,320
Speaker 3: able to stay out of court for most things. You know,

114
00:06:41,480 --> 00:06:45,280
Speaker 3: I'm making child support payments and everything like that, keeping

115
00:06:45,320 --> 00:06:47,760
Speaker 3: it all documented and everything. But outside of that, we

116
00:06:47,800 --> 00:06:52,560
Speaker 3: can usually come to an agreement about most things.

117
00:06:50,800 --> 00:06:56,160
Speaker 1: M What do you do for work? Oh?

118
00:06:56,279 --> 00:06:59,360
Speaker 3: I do paintless dent repair. I'm actually at my job

119
00:06:59,440 --> 00:07:03,120
Speaker 3: right now. I just I take dents out of cars

120
00:07:03,160 --> 00:07:06,280
Speaker 3: without needing to repaint them, basically just massage the metal

121
00:07:06,320 --> 00:07:10,119
Speaker 3: back into place. Mm hmm, and uh get paid pretty

122
00:07:10,160 --> 00:07:10,840
Speaker 3: damn well too.

123
00:07:12,440 --> 00:07:16,440
Speaker 1: Do you do you do you feel peaceful.

124
00:07:19,080 --> 00:07:19,840
Speaker 3: Like at my job?

125
00:07:20,560 --> 00:07:21,440
Speaker 1: It's in general?

126
00:07:23,120 --> 00:07:25,720
Speaker 3: Yeah, I do, honestly. Now I'm nervous.

127
00:07:25,960 --> 00:07:28,200
Speaker 1: You know what? What? What? What made?

128
00:07:28,200 --> 00:07:28,320
Speaker 3: What?

129
00:07:28,400 --> 00:07:30,280
Speaker 1: In general? Makes you feel peaceful?

130
00:07:32,240 --> 00:07:37,640
Speaker 3: I just honestly feel like I I have hope for

131
00:07:37,680 --> 00:07:40,800
Speaker 3: the future, and I can also look at where I

132
00:07:40,840 --> 00:07:43,600
Speaker 3: have been at in the past and the fact that

133
00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:45,400
Speaker 3: there were so many rough things that I had to

134
00:07:45,440 --> 00:07:47,840
Speaker 3: push through to get to where I am now, so

135
00:07:47,840 --> 00:07:51,200
Speaker 3: where it doesn't really matter what's coming in the future.

136
00:07:51,400 --> 00:07:53,440
Speaker 3: I just know that I will be able to handle

137
00:07:53,480 --> 00:07:59,720
Speaker 3: her to the most, you know, like I had who

138
00:07:59,800 --> 00:08:02,080
Speaker 3: I'm like, I've given too much information about myself. I

139
00:08:02,120 --> 00:08:03,680
Speaker 3: don't know if I want to delve too deep into

140
00:08:03,680 --> 00:08:09,120
Speaker 3: the past. Whatever you want, man, Yeah, well, I've gotten

141
00:08:09,160 --> 00:08:12,000
Speaker 3: over a lot of addictions in the past. I used

142
00:08:12,040 --> 00:08:15,720
Speaker 3: to be addicted to pretty much, you know, anything I

143
00:08:15,720 --> 00:08:19,040
Speaker 3: could get my hands onto cut all that out. When

144
00:08:19,080 --> 00:08:24,760
Speaker 3: I learned my ex was pregnant, there was just you know,

145
00:08:24,880 --> 00:08:27,920
Speaker 3: I also started a business a while back doing paintless.

146
00:08:27,920 --> 00:08:31,120
Speaker 3: Didn't repair, and I was able to buy a house

147
00:08:31,160 --> 00:08:34,599
Speaker 3: at twenty one. Cool gone now of course, because we

148
00:08:34,679 --> 00:08:40,520
Speaker 3: broke up. You know, I just feel like I've been

149
00:08:40,559 --> 00:08:43,679
Speaker 3: through quite a bit and I've always come out, you know,

150
00:08:44,040 --> 00:08:47,559
Speaker 3: in a relatively better spot. So I just don't have

151
00:08:47,640 --> 00:08:51,920
Speaker 3: to really worry about what's coming, just knowing that I

152
00:08:51,960 --> 00:08:54,360
Speaker 3: can be confident in my abilities to take care of it.

153
00:08:55,600 --> 00:08:55,840
Speaker 3: You know.

154
00:08:55,920 --> 00:09:00,559
Speaker 1: It's so interesting because I'm constantly, just to guess, relate

155
00:09:00,600 --> 00:09:03,080
Speaker 1: to you in some way. I feel like I'm I'm

156
00:09:03,160 --> 00:09:10,240
Speaker 1: constantly uh searching after a sense of security in in

157
00:09:10,320 --> 00:09:14,360
Speaker 1: my life, and I think I'm always well, it's like

158
00:09:14,480 --> 00:09:16,640
Speaker 1: I talk so much because I only because I think

159
00:09:16,679 --> 00:09:18,840
Speaker 1: about it so much about how how much of life

160
00:09:18,880 --> 00:09:21,240
Speaker 1: is kind of internal versus external, And I think I

161
00:09:21,320 --> 00:09:25,760
Speaker 1: search for a lot of my security externally, and I

162
00:09:25,800 --> 00:09:29,760
Speaker 1: find a lot of security and external things. But what

163
00:09:29,880 --> 00:09:34,359
Speaker 1: you're talking about just the this this like the security

164
00:09:35,040 --> 00:09:41,000
Speaker 1: in this innate belief that you have you know exactly

165
00:09:41,080 --> 00:09:44,880
Speaker 1: who you are and what you're capable of and what

166
00:09:44,920 --> 00:09:48,959
Speaker 1: you can withstand and and like that, nobody can ever

167
00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:52,680
Speaker 1: take that away from you. Is it really is a

168
00:09:52,720 --> 00:09:58,040
Speaker 1: powerful form of of internal security that can that can

169
00:09:58,080 --> 00:10:03,760
Speaker 1: even over a lot of things we try to find

170
00:10:04,080 --> 00:10:09,439
Speaker 1: external security in, like like relationships or things like that,

171
00:10:09,880 --> 00:10:12,400
Speaker 1: because it's you know, it's it's crazy, because a lot

172
00:10:12,400 --> 00:10:13,760
Speaker 1: of that stuff is out of our control. But that

173
00:10:13,840 --> 00:10:17,520
Speaker 1: doesn't mean we want to negate its existence and ignore

174
00:10:17,520 --> 00:10:20,520
Speaker 1: it and be fucking you know, monks and whatever.

175
00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:25,400
Speaker 3: Uh oh, But that that is a modern development for

176
00:10:25,480 --> 00:10:28,440
Speaker 3: me as well, like very recent development for me as well.

177
00:10:28,480 --> 00:10:31,400
Speaker 3: Because I was doing that, I was pulling a lot

178
00:10:31,440 --> 00:10:34,359
Speaker 3: of you know, peace of mind out of my relationship.

179
00:10:34,400 --> 00:10:37,280
Speaker 3: Because we were together for six years, we had been

180
00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:41,320
Speaker 3: through a lot, so I thought everything was completely unshakeable

181
00:10:41,679 --> 00:10:45,760
Speaker 3: in terms of that, and instead of seeing me as myself,

182
00:10:45,840 --> 00:10:49,240
Speaker 3: I kind of saw myself as a partner, you know,

183
00:10:49,480 --> 00:10:52,520
Speaker 3: or a provider, a father. And I was pulling a

184
00:10:52,520 --> 00:10:55,960
Speaker 3: lot of my piece out of being a part of

185
00:10:57,800 --> 00:11:00,360
Speaker 3: everything that I was involved in rather than who I

186
00:11:00,520 --> 00:11:03,960
Speaker 3: was as a person. You know, it was my relationships

187
00:11:03,960 --> 00:11:07,240
Speaker 3: and the thing that I had accomplished, right, rather than

188
00:11:07,600 --> 00:11:10,800
Speaker 3: that I can't accomplish and knowing what struggles I have

189
00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:13,200
Speaker 3: been through to become a better person.

190
00:11:14,080 --> 00:11:19,720
Speaker 1: Right, well, it's so fucking weird, man, because I think

191
00:11:19,800 --> 00:11:25,240
Speaker 1: that there's uh, there's like there's gotta be some balance

192
00:11:25,360 --> 00:11:28,200
Speaker 1: or some place on a spectrum, because I do think

193
00:11:28,200 --> 00:11:32,680
Speaker 1: it's important to really like have other people that you

194
00:11:33,240 --> 00:11:35,040
Speaker 1: care about and that are part of your I mean,

195
00:11:35,040 --> 00:11:37,760
Speaker 1: that's I guess what's nice about being a dad, it seems,

196
00:11:38,280 --> 00:11:41,440
Speaker 1: is that you have this other person that you like,

197
00:11:42,040 --> 00:11:45,079
Speaker 1: you have you have something that's not just yourself to

198
00:11:45,600 --> 00:11:49,880
Speaker 1: really really really strongly care about and that like needs you.

199
00:11:54,160 --> 00:11:57,600
Speaker 3: It's just for certain, for certain, especially because you know,

200
00:11:58,000 --> 00:12:01,319
Speaker 3: after and it happened, I'm quit my job and I

201
00:12:01,720 --> 00:12:03,760
Speaker 3: was in a different state at the time that we

202
00:12:03,920 --> 00:12:06,360
Speaker 3: broke up. She just poke up with me over text,

203
00:12:06,440 --> 00:12:11,120
Speaker 3: which is kind of crazy after six years. But regardless,

204
00:12:12,080 --> 00:12:14,800
Speaker 3: I almost just quit my job right then, drove the

205
00:12:15,120 --> 00:12:18,880
Speaker 3: five hours home and just try to fix things, and

206
00:12:19,559 --> 00:12:22,920
Speaker 3: you know that didn't work out. I didn't do that.

207
00:12:23,160 --> 00:12:26,200
Speaker 3: So having my daughter there really also kept it in

208
00:12:26,240 --> 00:12:27,920
Speaker 3: the back of my mind that I need to keep

209
00:12:27,920 --> 00:12:30,439
Speaker 3: this job. I need to dig through, you know, and

210
00:12:30,840 --> 00:12:33,200
Speaker 3: also I need to push past my feelings and not

211
00:12:33,280 --> 00:12:36,400
Speaker 3: just feel down like I have a reason that I

212
00:12:36,600 --> 00:12:39,719
Speaker 3: need to keep on going. I can't just walk and

213
00:12:40,200 --> 00:12:41,920
Speaker 3: quit out on my Well.

214
00:12:41,880 --> 00:12:46,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, so you said, well, I'm so happy to

215
00:12:46,760 --> 00:12:51,600
Speaker 1: hear that you've been able to build a really strong

216
00:12:51,960 --> 00:12:58,360
Speaker 1: sense of like internal confidence. That's that's not easy to

217
00:12:58,440 --> 00:13:03,040
Speaker 1: do and it's important. So I'm glad to hear you

218
00:13:03,040 --> 00:13:06,040
Speaker 1: were able to do it. What, uh, what do you

219
00:13:06,040 --> 00:13:08,880
Speaker 1: want to do with that internal confidence? What's the next

220
00:13:09,240 --> 00:13:10,320
Speaker 1: in your life? King?

221
00:13:12,520 --> 00:13:18,120
Speaker 3: Uh? You're asking me, like, what my long term goals are? Yes, yeah,

222
00:13:18,160 --> 00:13:24,439
Speaker 3: I have like, okay, I have realistic, I have ridiculous,

223
00:13:24,480 --> 00:13:26,280
Speaker 3: and I have somewhat in the middle of what do

224
00:13:26,400 --> 00:13:27,920
Speaker 3: What do you want? Birds? Uh?

225
00:13:28,240 --> 00:13:32,240
Speaker 1: You have realistic ridiculous, and so let's start with ridiculous.

226
00:13:32,320 --> 00:13:35,240
Speaker 1: Let's why only go from ridiculous and work our way

227
00:13:35,280 --> 00:13:36,199
Speaker 1: back to earth.

228
00:13:38,240 --> 00:13:41,959
Speaker 3: Ridiculous. This is definitely people are going to know exactly

229
00:13:41,960 --> 00:13:44,719
Speaker 3: who I am after I say this, But.

230
00:13:45,160 --> 00:13:48,360
Speaker 1: Why are you? Are you scud? Let's let you talk.

231
00:13:49,440 --> 00:13:52,440
Speaker 3: I tell everybody this, But I really want to be

232
00:13:52,600 --> 00:13:58,199
Speaker 3: a space pirate. I want to I want to Uh,

233
00:13:58,400 --> 00:14:01,960
Speaker 3: I really want to study electrical engineering and aerospace engineering

234
00:14:02,040 --> 00:14:07,240
Speaker 3: to create maybe a a better type of electrostatic propulsion

235
00:14:07,320 --> 00:14:12,720
Speaker 3: system or you know, a massless reaction system for spacecraft.

236
00:14:13,040 --> 00:14:15,440
Speaker 3: And if I can do that, I'm going to retire

237
00:14:15,600 --> 00:14:17,960
Speaker 3: and I'm just going to be a pirate out in

238
00:14:18,080 --> 00:14:21,720
Speaker 3: space stealing minerals and ship from SpaceX. But I know

239
00:14:21,800 --> 00:14:24,600
Speaker 3: that's ridiculous. I'm still going to try it, try for it.

240
00:14:25,280 --> 00:14:30,400
Speaker 3: But yeah, the somewhat in the middle of that is

241
00:14:30,440 --> 00:14:33,280
Speaker 3: I definitely am going to work on getting my degree

242
00:14:33,320 --> 00:14:36,680
Speaker 3: in aerospace and electrical engineering. I want a duel major

243
00:14:36,720 --> 00:14:39,840
Speaker 3: on that. I think that would be sweet, and potentially

244
00:14:39,880 --> 00:14:43,240
Speaker 3: get a job for NASA or you know, maybe Boeing

245
00:14:43,360 --> 00:14:50,080
Speaker 3: or someplace like that, maybe even SpaceX. And then realistically,

246
00:14:50,960 --> 00:14:55,480
Speaker 3: what I am working on right now is I'm investing

247
00:14:55,520 --> 00:14:59,400
Speaker 3: a lot of money into tax leans so that eventually

248
00:14:59,560 --> 00:15:07,000
Speaker 3: I can, eventually I can house much of the homeless

249
00:15:07,000 --> 00:15:10,000
Speaker 3: population in Atlanta. I would really love to do that.

250
00:15:10,280 --> 00:15:13,480
Speaker 1: Well, how's what do you mean? How's how tell them?

251
00:15:13,520 --> 00:15:15,200
Speaker 1: How does that work? What does a tax lian?

252
00:15:16,760 --> 00:15:19,840
Speaker 3: Oh? Okay, so if you don't pay your property taxes,

253
00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:24,120
Speaker 3: the government of your county wherever you wherever you're at,

254
00:15:24,360 --> 00:15:27,120
Speaker 3: they auction them off in a tax lean sale. Or

255
00:15:27,240 --> 00:15:30,320
Speaker 3: sometimes it's a tax d depending on what state you're in.

256
00:15:31,320 --> 00:15:34,760
Speaker 3: You go to the courthouse, you bid on them, and

257
00:15:34,920 --> 00:15:38,760
Speaker 3: you either get the house after a year, or you

258
00:15:38,800 --> 00:15:42,560
Speaker 3: get your money back plus twenty percent. You know, So

259
00:15:42,640 --> 00:15:45,960
Speaker 3: maybe let's say that, Yeah, let's say that this house

260
00:15:46,040 --> 00:15:49,800
Speaker 3: is like two hundred thousand dollars, right, they have back

261
00:15:49,880 --> 00:15:52,480
Speaker 3: taxes on it of ten thousand dollars. You go in,

262
00:15:52,640 --> 00:15:56,520
Speaker 3: you bid on the back taxes or twelve thousand. Well,

263
00:15:56,560 --> 00:15:58,600
Speaker 3: you're gonna get all of your twelve thousand back and

264
00:15:58,680 --> 00:16:01,960
Speaker 3: you're gonna get twenty percent on the you know, ten

265
00:16:02,000 --> 00:16:04,480
Speaker 3: thousand of the back tax, so you get an extra

266
00:16:04,520 --> 00:16:06,880
Speaker 3: two thousand out of that. Or if they don't pay

267
00:16:07,280 --> 00:16:11,080
Speaker 3: you get the house. You get all of the entire

268
00:16:11,160 --> 00:16:12,120
Speaker 3: equity of the house.

269
00:16:12,920 --> 00:16:15,640
Speaker 1: So you're how are you hoping to use this to

270
00:16:16,040 --> 00:16:17,680
Speaker 1: how's the homeless population?

271
00:16:19,160 --> 00:16:23,040
Speaker 3: I really want to buy a large plot of land

272
00:16:23,600 --> 00:16:27,480
Speaker 3: and start using sustainable building methods like rammed earth and

273
00:16:30,200 --> 00:16:34,000
Speaker 3: just to you know, create lots of apartments and use

274
00:16:34,080 --> 00:16:37,080
Speaker 3: the homeless people themselves, hire them on and teach them

275
00:16:37,120 --> 00:16:40,040
Speaker 3: the skills to build these houses. Start a company that

276
00:16:40,320 --> 00:16:43,680
Speaker 3: you know employs a lot of them, just so that

277
00:16:43,760 --> 00:16:46,720
Speaker 3: I can continue to build houses, sell them or use

278
00:16:46,760 --> 00:16:50,960
Speaker 3: them to house the you know, homeless population here in

279
00:16:51,000 --> 00:16:55,640
Speaker 3: Atlanta and just kind of take care of the problem

280
00:16:55,680 --> 00:16:56,080
Speaker 3: that way.

281
00:16:57,600 --> 00:17:00,600
Speaker 1: Cool man is that? Yeah, No, it's it's a cool

282
00:17:00,600 --> 00:17:03,560
Speaker 1: it's a cool idea. That's a cool idea. Well, Matt,

283
00:17:03,600 --> 00:17:06,639
Speaker 1: you listen. You sound like you got you sound like

284
00:17:06,680 --> 00:17:08,960
Speaker 1: you're doing all right. Well, if I had to rank

285
00:17:09,080 --> 00:17:11,879
Speaker 1: the if I if I had to rank you on

286
00:17:11,960 --> 00:17:15,159
Speaker 1: a scale from like most depressed person I've heard on

287
00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:17,840
Speaker 1: the show to least depressed person I've heard on the show,

288
00:17:17,960 --> 00:17:22,320
Speaker 1: myself included myself very much included. I would I would

289
00:17:22,359 --> 00:17:25,240
Speaker 1: put you on the lower end of that spectrum, which

290
00:17:26,359 --> 00:17:27,919
Speaker 1: I hope, I hope you're proud of.

291
00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:31,760
Speaker 3: Thank you. I do appreciate that.

292
00:17:33,800 --> 00:17:34,800
Speaker 1: Go ahead, go ahead.

293
00:17:36,160 --> 00:17:39,000
Speaker 3: Can I ask you like, has my voice sounded like

294
00:17:39,160 --> 00:17:41,040
Speaker 3: shaky and nervous this entire time?

295
00:17:41,960 --> 00:17:45,399
Speaker 1: I want it? Really truly, hasn't? I've it?

296
00:17:45,760 --> 00:17:46,080
Speaker 3: Really?

297
00:17:46,119 --> 00:17:51,000
Speaker 1: You sound you sound quite confident. Actually you sound uh,

298
00:17:51,400 --> 00:17:54,679
Speaker 1: I like your voice not to be you know, weird,

299
00:17:54,760 --> 00:17:56,600
Speaker 1: but you know you have a you have a nice voice.

300
00:17:58,520 --> 00:18:02,359
Speaker 3: Thank you, I do appreciate it. And yeah, thanks thanks

301
00:18:02,359 --> 00:18:04,720
Speaker 3: to being in front of so many people.

302
00:18:04,640 --> 00:18:06,760
Speaker 1: No, you were, you were, you were great man. I

303
00:18:06,800 --> 00:18:08,639
Speaker 1: and thank you again for the kind of words he

304
00:18:08,680 --> 00:18:12,639
Speaker 1: said at the beginning. They really were. We're sweeten and mental.

305
00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:17,359
Speaker 3: Lot, oh absolutely, and Lyle, you have millions of people

306
00:18:17,400 --> 00:18:18,040
Speaker 3: who watch.

307
00:18:18,440 --> 00:18:21,200
Speaker 1: A million who knows, who knows?

308
00:18:21,720 --> 00:18:26,240
Speaker 3: They all come for they all come for a reason, man,

309
00:18:26,359 --> 00:18:29,240
Speaker 3: like you're just a likable person and you have such

310
00:18:29,280 --> 00:18:31,520
Speaker 3: a great way of thinking, like you gotta stop ragging

311
00:18:31,560 --> 00:18:32,400
Speaker 3: on yourself so long.

312
00:18:32,520 --> 00:18:35,080
Speaker 1: Thanks Thanks man. I'm gonna I'll try not to. I'm

313
00:18:35,080 --> 00:18:37,600
Speaker 1: gonna try. I keep saying, I'm gonna try to hate

314
00:18:37,600 --> 00:18:43,240
Speaker 1: myself only the I think there's an optimal amount of

315
00:18:42,920 --> 00:18:45,800
Speaker 1: of hating yourself, and I'm trying to get there. I

316
00:18:45,800 --> 00:18:47,520
Speaker 1: think it's probably on the lower end of what I

317
00:18:47,560 --> 00:18:51,159
Speaker 1: currently do now, and I'm gonna try to try to

318
00:18:51,200 --> 00:18:51,560
Speaker 1: get there.

319
00:18:53,400 --> 00:18:56,040
Speaker 3: I don't think you gotto. I think you gotta. I

320
00:18:56,040 --> 00:18:57,719
Speaker 3: think you got to hate the fact that there are

321
00:18:57,800 --> 00:19:02,919
Speaker 3: goals that you haven't yet accomplished, but not yourself in

322
00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:05,200
Speaker 3: the fact that you have accomplished, but hate the fact

323
00:19:05,240 --> 00:19:07,719
Speaker 3: that the parents has that you haven't done.

324
00:19:07,880 --> 00:19:09,760
Speaker 1: You're You're a good You're a good guy, James. I

325
00:19:09,920 --> 00:19:12,119
Speaker 1: I'm I I have a lot of respect for you.

326
00:19:13,400 --> 00:19:15,919
Speaker 3: Well, thank you. I appreciate that you have a good

327
00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:19,040
Speaker 3: rest of the nam and take care you two law.

328
00:19:20,480 --> 00:19:22,600
Speaker 1: That was that was nice. That was a nice gentleman.

329
00:19:23,760 --> 00:19:26,160
Speaker 1: I'm trying to think if I have any post call

330
00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:36,800
Speaker 1: thoughts on that. Uh yeah, that guy, that guy was cool.

331
00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:38,960
Speaker 1: What did he say? He said what he said at

332
00:19:38,960 --> 00:19:42,040
Speaker 1: the beginning to me, that was really nice that I'm

333
00:19:42,080 --> 00:19:45,280
Speaker 1: trying not to. I don't have to understand everything. I

334
00:19:45,320 --> 00:19:47,840
Speaker 1: don't know. I don't know what I'm I don't really

335
00:19:47,920 --> 00:19:51,679
Speaker 1: know what I'm doing anymore. I don't really know. And

336
00:19:51,760 --> 00:19:58,080
Speaker 1: I maybe that's I should shouldn't be so open about that,

337
00:19:58,720 --> 00:20:02,560
Speaker 1: but I but I do. I wonder, I wonder sometimes,

338
00:20:02,760 --> 00:20:07,719
Speaker 1: But I also whatever, it's fine. I'm gonna eventually close.

339
00:20:07,920 --> 00:20:11,200
Speaker 1: I'm gonna eventually close my laptop and I'm gonna go outside.

340
00:20:11,240 --> 00:20:14,200
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go for a walk and there'll be It'll

341
00:20:14,200 --> 00:20:18,280
Speaker 1: be like I never was it ever? Anything? Is that crazy?

342
00:20:18,560 --> 00:20:21,400
Speaker 1: Do I sound crazy? Right now? Let's keep going, Let's

343
00:20:21,480 --> 00:20:28,199
Speaker 1: keep taking calls. Hello, Hello, Hi, Hey, do me a

344
00:20:28,240 --> 00:20:30,240
Speaker 1: quick favor. Can you can you take me off of

345
00:20:30,320 --> 00:20:33,680
Speaker 1: speakerphone and turn off your stream?

346
00:20:34,040 --> 00:20:35,120
Speaker 4: You're not on speaker.

347
00:20:35,160 --> 00:20:39,440
Speaker 5: But I'm at a concert right now. Is this level

348
00:20:39,440 --> 00:20:41,280
Speaker 5: of volume like background noise acceptable?

349
00:20:41,800 --> 00:20:42,000
Speaker 2: Wait?

350
00:20:42,040 --> 00:20:44,080
Speaker 1: Why are you? Why are you calling me from a concert?

351
00:20:45,840 --> 00:20:47,240
Speaker 4: Because I'm waiting to go on.

352
00:20:47,520 --> 00:20:50,960
Speaker 5: It's a it's a like a classical music kind of concert.

353
00:20:51,080 --> 00:20:52,439
Speaker 5: So we're just waiting around to go on.

354
00:20:53,119 --> 00:20:57,480
Speaker 1: Oh okay, Oh I see you're performing in this concert?

355
00:20:59,240 --> 00:20:59,480
Speaker 2: Yeah?

356
00:20:59,520 --> 00:21:00,000
Speaker 3: Wait a seton?

357
00:21:00,280 --> 00:21:01,000
Speaker 2: Is this liles?

358
00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:01,600
Speaker 5: Like for real?

359
00:21:01,640 --> 00:21:03,080
Speaker 4: This isn't This isn't a screener?

360
00:21:03,480 --> 00:21:08,600
Speaker 1: What do you do? What are you performing in the concert?

361
00:21:08,760 --> 00:21:12,680
Speaker 5: Well, we're playing with a jazz clarinetta's named Duren Ketchens

362
00:21:13,560 --> 00:21:17,119
Speaker 5: and we're playing uh House of the Rising Sun, What

363
00:21:17,200 --> 00:21:20,800
Speaker 5: a Wonderful World on a couple other tunes, and I'm

364
00:21:20,800 --> 00:21:21,880
Speaker 5: playing the bassoon.

365
00:21:23,160 --> 00:21:29,240
Speaker 1: That's cool. M hmm, what are you excited? Wait? I

366
00:21:29,280 --> 00:21:31,199
Speaker 1: have so cure? Why do you? Why are you calling me?

367
00:21:31,280 --> 00:21:33,080
Speaker 1: This seems like something you'd want to like be in

368
00:21:33,119 --> 00:21:36,200
Speaker 1: the moment of Like I feel like most people call

369
00:21:36,280 --> 00:21:38,520
Speaker 1: me when they're like kind of bored, Like would you?

370
00:21:38,600 --> 00:21:41,840
Speaker 1: Are you not? Would What made you want to call

371
00:21:41,880 --> 00:21:42,840
Speaker 1: me in the middle of all this?

372
00:21:45,080 --> 00:21:48,800
Speaker 5: I'm not doing much. Everyone really has their own friends.

373
00:21:48,840 --> 00:21:52,320
Speaker 5: But I saw that you were taking calls. So I

374
00:21:52,359 --> 00:21:54,200
Speaker 5: decided to take a chance, and I didn't think i'd

375
00:21:54,200 --> 00:21:54,639
Speaker 5: get this far.

376
00:21:57,119 --> 00:21:59,159
Speaker 1: Oh wow, Well, how long have you been playing the

377
00:21:59,240 --> 00:21:59,840
Speaker 1: bassoon for?

378
00:22:00,119 --> 00:22:04,960
Speaker 4: Or about ten years? A little less than ten years?

379
00:22:05,160 --> 00:22:07,919
Speaker 1: Oh geez, what are you in like school for that

380
00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:09,280
Speaker 1: or what what are you doing?

381
00:22:10,800 --> 00:22:10,960
Speaker 5: Yeah?

382
00:22:11,000 --> 00:22:12,120
Speaker 4: I'm in college for it.

383
00:22:13,320 --> 00:22:18,000
Speaker 1: Wow, you said every you said everyone has there for

384
00:22:18,040 --> 00:22:20,119
Speaker 1: you don't have any friends in the in the in

385
00:22:20,160 --> 00:22:21,080
Speaker 1: the thing that you're doing.

386
00:22:22,880 --> 00:22:25,360
Speaker 5: I have some friends, but they have friends, so they're

387
00:22:25,400 --> 00:22:28,000
Speaker 5: talking to their friends and I'm just sitting here waiting.

388
00:22:28,359 --> 00:22:30,639
Speaker 1: Why didn't you beat Why don't you go be friends

389
00:22:30,640 --> 00:22:31,680
Speaker 1: with your friends friends?

390
00:22:34,440 --> 00:22:38,280
Speaker 5: I struggle to socialize. I'm working on it.

391
00:22:39,119 --> 00:22:40,520
Speaker 1: Okay, a couple of.

392
00:22:40,400 --> 00:22:42,520
Speaker 5: My my friends are actually in the audience.

393
00:22:43,720 --> 00:22:44,679
Speaker 1: What the wind do you go on?

394
00:22:47,760 --> 00:22:51,360
Speaker 5: Probably in like I don't know, five ish minutes, maybe

395
00:22:51,480 --> 00:22:52,960
Speaker 5: maybe ten between five and son.

396
00:22:53,720 --> 00:22:57,760
Speaker 1: What I'm cure? What is a basoon? What is a bassoon?

397
00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:05,600
Speaker 5: It's a large woodwind instrument that uses a read It's

398
00:23:05,640 --> 00:23:09,080
Speaker 5: like four feet tall. If you google it'll it'll come up.

399
00:23:11,960 --> 00:23:15,639
Speaker 1: Okay, so you play the bassoon, you're about to go

400
00:23:15,680 --> 00:23:19,720
Speaker 1: with your the opening for someone?

401
00:23:22,720 --> 00:23:23,280
Speaker 4: Not really?

402
00:23:23,359 --> 00:23:25,800
Speaker 5: I mean like there's two different bands in the college.

403
00:23:25,880 --> 00:23:28,040
Speaker 5: So like the band I'm in went first, and now

404
00:23:28,040 --> 00:23:30,560
Speaker 5: the other band's on, and then we're gonna combine the

405
00:23:30,600 --> 00:23:32,399
Speaker 5: bands and play with the guest artist.

406
00:23:33,080 --> 00:23:35,760
Speaker 1: Cool. How is college going?

407
00:23:37,720 --> 00:23:39,040
Speaker 5: It's pretty good.

408
00:23:39,119 --> 00:23:42,240
Speaker 4: It's better than last semester. Last semester was a little rough.

409
00:23:43,480 --> 00:23:44,040
Speaker 1: Why is that?

410
00:23:46,440 --> 00:23:48,760
Speaker 5: I was going through a lot of like outside issues

411
00:23:49,640 --> 00:23:52,120
Speaker 5: and I was actually I was actually leaving a guy

412
00:23:52,840 --> 00:23:54,960
Speaker 5: and had to like find an apartment and stuff. And

413
00:23:55,080 --> 00:23:57,399
Speaker 5: I had him been to college before that in like

414
00:23:57,440 --> 00:24:00,800
Speaker 5: three years, so it was a big adjustment and just

415
00:24:00,840 --> 00:24:02,400
Speaker 5: like getting used to all that stuff.

416
00:24:03,440 --> 00:24:05,880
Speaker 1: And how are you doing now? You say you're having

417
00:24:05,880 --> 00:24:09,800
Speaker 1: trouble like socializing. Is that for like a preferred particular

418
00:24:09,840 --> 00:24:11,680
Speaker 1: reason or are you just kind of trying to come into

419
00:24:11,760 --> 00:24:12,680
Speaker 1: your own universe?

420
00:24:14,640 --> 00:24:15,960
Speaker 4: I guess coming to my own.

421
00:24:16,040 --> 00:24:20,200
Speaker 5: I have social anxiety, and I also feel very inferior

422
00:24:20,240 --> 00:24:22,240
Speaker 5: to most of the people here because they're very talented

423
00:24:22,280 --> 00:24:24,440
Speaker 5: and I don't feel as talented.

424
00:24:25,000 --> 00:24:30,160
Speaker 1: Interesting you you feel inferior? You say, I think that.

425
00:24:31,840 --> 00:24:36,040
Speaker 1: I do think that being like self confidence is necessary

426
00:24:37,080 --> 00:24:43,960
Speaker 1: to be for social to kind of cure curb social anxiety,

427
00:24:44,600 --> 00:24:47,160
Speaker 1: because not that you have to like think you're better

428
00:24:47,200 --> 00:24:50,200
Speaker 1: than everyone else. But you just have to know that

429
00:24:50,520 --> 00:24:56,080
Speaker 1: you're like a decent enough human being that other people's

430
00:24:56,080 --> 00:24:58,359
Speaker 1: opinions of you don't matter, so you don't have to

431
00:24:58,440 --> 00:25:00,240
Speaker 1: be afraid of them, you know.

432
00:25:01,160 --> 00:25:04,159
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, I've I've definitely struggled with that for a

433
00:25:04,200 --> 00:25:07,200
Speaker 5: long time. And I'm at the point where, like I

434
00:25:07,280 --> 00:25:10,520
Speaker 5: know that stuff cognitively, it's just about like believing it

435
00:25:10,560 --> 00:25:13,840
Speaker 5: and like you know, acting on it. And it's just

436
00:25:13,920 --> 00:25:16,080
Speaker 5: like a physical like change in my brain where I'm

437
00:25:16,119 --> 00:25:18,159
Speaker 5: just like in fight or flight where I'm just like,

438
00:25:18,200 --> 00:25:21,360
Speaker 5: oh my god, everyone hates me or whatever. And it's

439
00:25:21,359 --> 00:25:23,520
Speaker 5: like a daily thing to just either give in or

440
00:25:23,600 --> 00:25:25,760
Speaker 5: you know, like you said, just like realize, you know,

441
00:25:26,040 --> 00:25:31,240
Speaker 5: I'm another ants on the ground and I've been recently

442
00:25:31,359 --> 00:25:34,359
Speaker 5: you know, doing the latter and just like talking to

443
00:25:34,400 --> 00:25:38,520
Speaker 5: people and uh, just finding I have to connect like

444
00:25:38,560 --> 00:25:41,280
Speaker 5: the second of what I said, So like, you know,

445
00:25:41,440 --> 00:25:45,840
Speaker 5: just you know, being among my fellow musicians.

446
00:25:45,840 --> 00:25:49,360
Speaker 1: Cool. Cool, that's great. Yeah, you're in a scene. You're

447
00:25:49,359 --> 00:25:53,240
Speaker 1: in a scene of people doing stuff. I'm I'm almost

448
00:25:53,240 --> 00:25:55,480
Speaker 1: I almost feel bad talking to you right now because

449
00:25:55,480 --> 00:25:58,240
Speaker 1: i feel like I'm keeping you from like actually socializing.

450
00:25:58,400 --> 00:26:00,520
Speaker 1: Do you do do you do stuff like this a lot,

451
00:26:00,560 --> 00:26:04,320
Speaker 1: like like go off into the corner and like go

452
00:26:04,440 --> 00:26:06,400
Speaker 1: on your phone or stuff like that.

453
00:26:08,800 --> 00:26:11,119
Speaker 5: I mean kind of I do. I do kind of

454
00:26:11,200 --> 00:26:14,119
Speaker 5: like you know, dip my toe in, so like I'll uh,

455
00:26:14,520 --> 00:26:17,639
Speaker 5: you know, stay in my little corner and then I'll

456
00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:19,960
Speaker 5: like try to socialize someone and then like the conversation

457
00:26:20,000 --> 00:26:22,000
Speaker 5: will in and I'll go back to my corners. And

458
00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:25,439
Speaker 5: that sounds kind of a drab, But I would be

459
00:26:25,600 --> 00:26:27,200
Speaker 5: just on my phone right now if I wasn't talking

460
00:26:27,200 --> 00:26:29,119
Speaker 5: to you, And I'm really happy to be talking to you.

461
00:26:29,760 --> 00:26:31,800
Speaker 5: I we actually talked, and I think twenty twenty two

462
00:26:32,160 --> 00:26:34,280
Speaker 5: when you had Cucko as a gain.

463
00:26:34,440 --> 00:26:40,359
Speaker 1: Oh cool, cool cool, So fuck eat fuck man? What

464
00:26:40,359 --> 00:26:43,040
Speaker 1: what have you? What do you scroll on your phone

465
00:26:43,119 --> 00:26:45,760
Speaker 1: when you're like like, when you're like, if you weren't

466
00:26:45,800 --> 00:26:47,560
Speaker 1: talking to me, you'd be just in the corner scrolling

467
00:26:47,600 --> 00:26:48,840
Speaker 1: on your phone. What would you be doing?

468
00:26:50,600 --> 00:26:50,919
Speaker 4: Well?

469
00:26:51,000 --> 00:26:53,159
Speaker 5: Yeah, before I called you, I was on Instagram and

470
00:26:53,160 --> 00:26:54,560
Speaker 5: that's how I saw that you were alive.

471
00:26:55,720 --> 00:26:56,320
Speaker 4: So I was on.

472
00:26:56,240 --> 00:26:59,000
Speaker 5: Instagram and I do a lot of sadoku, a lot

473
00:26:59,040 --> 00:27:01,040
Speaker 5: of sadoku.

474
00:27:01,200 --> 00:27:01,720
Speaker 4: I check my.

475
00:27:01,680 --> 00:27:03,680
Speaker 5: Email and try to be productive.

476
00:27:03,600 --> 00:27:08,080
Speaker 1: Okay, but you're like backstage at a concert, and there's like,

477
00:27:08,960 --> 00:27:11,560
Speaker 1: I'm just I'm just very I'm very confused. Also, like

478
00:27:11,600 --> 00:27:13,760
Speaker 1: where are you? Are you alone right now? Like where

479
00:27:13,760 --> 00:27:14,840
Speaker 1: are you that you're talking to me?

480
00:27:16,280 --> 00:27:18,359
Speaker 5: I'm in a room full of people, but they're they

481
00:27:18,400 --> 00:27:19,200
Speaker 5: doing their own thing?

482
00:27:20,480 --> 00:27:22,679
Speaker 1: Okay, can they hear us talk?

483
00:27:24,920 --> 00:27:26,960
Speaker 5: I mean some of them can hear me. Most of

484
00:27:27,000 --> 00:27:30,760
Speaker 5: them aren't paying attention. And I don't mind saying what

485
00:27:30,800 --> 00:27:32,399
Speaker 5: I'm saying in front of the people who can hear it.

486
00:27:33,200 --> 00:27:39,680
Speaker 1: Okay, Okay. The bassoon, huh, what's so? Let me I'm

487
00:27:39,680 --> 00:27:42,080
Speaker 1: gonna google what a bassoon looks like because I actually

488
00:27:42,119 --> 00:27:50,600
Speaker 1: don't think I know. But soon, Oh that's a a Oh,

489
00:27:50,800 --> 00:27:54,879
Speaker 1: it's got it's got the little it's like a fucking saxophone.

490
00:27:56,000 --> 00:28:03,399
Speaker 1: Fucked uh a clarinet and had a little baby. Yes,

491
00:28:04,119 --> 00:28:06,520
Speaker 1: well look at this love that Look at this little

492
00:28:06,600 --> 00:28:11,680
Speaker 1: it's like a little straw connected to a clarinet. That's crazy.

493
00:28:13,359 --> 00:28:14,560
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's called the vocal.

494
00:28:15,160 --> 00:28:18,040
Speaker 1: The vocal and you play that, you've you've played that

495
00:28:18,080 --> 00:28:19,440
Speaker 1: shit for ten years.

496
00:28:21,240 --> 00:28:21,679
Speaker 4: Just about.

497
00:28:21,840 --> 00:28:23,600
Speaker 5: Like I said, I had to take a three year break,

498
00:28:23,640 --> 00:28:25,159
Speaker 5: but otherwise I've been playing it.

499
00:28:28,680 --> 00:28:29,520
Speaker 1: Oh are you still there.

500
00:28:31,320 --> 00:28:33,399
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, yeah, you hear me, Oh yeah, I can

501
00:28:33,440 --> 00:28:33,679
Speaker 5: hear you.

502
00:28:33,680 --> 00:28:36,800
Speaker 1: Okay, So what's your how old are you?

503
00:28:38,680 --> 00:28:39,680
Speaker 5: I am twenty four.

504
00:28:40,400 --> 00:28:43,360
Speaker 1: And what's your dream? Or use your dream? To become

505
00:28:43,440 --> 00:28:45,240
Speaker 1: like a SoundCloud bassoon player?

506
00:28:47,960 --> 00:28:52,920
Speaker 5: I mean maybe there is jazz perposu. I honestly, I

507
00:28:52,960 --> 00:28:55,400
Speaker 5: have no idea at this point. I'm trying to just

508
00:28:55,520 --> 00:28:57,320
Speaker 5: keep it more in the day and more in the

509
00:28:57,320 --> 00:29:00,320
Speaker 5: short term, just like I want a degree. Want to

510
00:29:00,360 --> 00:29:02,080
Speaker 5: get a degree, and then I'll go from there. I

511
00:29:02,200 --> 00:29:04,760
Speaker 5: like to teach music and talk about music, but I don't.

512
00:29:04,800 --> 00:29:08,800
Speaker 5: I lost a lot of confidence with that and I

513
00:29:08,840 --> 00:29:11,000
Speaker 5: find I'm better one on one anyway. So that's what

514
00:29:11,000 --> 00:29:12,720
Speaker 5: I'm doing for now. I'm just doing lessons.

515
00:29:13,920 --> 00:29:14,400
Speaker 4: I don't know.

516
00:29:14,560 --> 00:29:17,440
Speaker 5: I just really love music and and like a general

517
00:29:17,520 --> 00:29:19,520
Speaker 5: dream would be to just like have a nice house

518
00:29:19,560 --> 00:29:22,440
Speaker 5: somewhere like in that kind of woodsy but not too woodsy,

519
00:29:23,800 --> 00:29:25,520
Speaker 5: and just you know, be financially stable.

520
00:29:26,080 --> 00:29:34,520
Speaker 1: Cool. The bassoon huh hm hmmm, yeah, theon. Do you

521
00:29:34,600 --> 00:29:38,280
Speaker 1: play other instruments? What other instruments do you play?

522
00:29:38,560 --> 00:29:41,240
Speaker 5: Yeah? Actually my first instrument was the flute, and I

523
00:29:41,280 --> 00:29:44,280
Speaker 5: played that for a long time. I can play the flute,

524
00:29:44,320 --> 00:29:48,000
Speaker 5: the clarinet, the saxophone, the bassoon, the phonium or the

525
00:29:48,080 --> 00:29:49,080
Speaker 5: tuba and the piano.

526
00:29:49,800 --> 00:29:52,520
Speaker 1: That's so many things. You're like a one A one

527
00:29:52,640 --> 00:29:53,720
Speaker 1: lady band.

528
00:29:55,040 --> 00:30:04,960
Speaker 5: Yes, Yeah, when's your album? We'll see. I'm I'm better

529
00:30:05,040 --> 00:30:07,680
Speaker 5: at like playing music than creating it. I mean I

530
00:30:07,720 --> 00:30:10,200
Speaker 5: have like mad like one song, but I lost it

531
00:30:10,200 --> 00:30:12,320
Speaker 5: because it was for an assignment and I can't access it,

532
00:30:12,360 --> 00:30:13,440
Speaker 5: so I'd have to recreate it.

533
00:30:13,960 --> 00:30:17,360
Speaker 1: Okay, sorry, if I'm about to say something was really dumb,

534
00:30:17,600 --> 00:30:22,840
Speaker 1: I already k listen. I can. I kind of understand

535
00:30:22,880 --> 00:30:24,680
Speaker 1: the answer to the question I was about to ask,

536
00:30:24,800 --> 00:30:28,440
Speaker 1: But like, what really is the difference between playing music

537
00:30:28,480 --> 00:30:29,280
Speaker 1: and creating it?

538
00:30:31,400 --> 00:30:33,360
Speaker 5: Well, with playing music, you don't have to worry about

539
00:30:33,400 --> 00:30:36,120
Speaker 5: creating it like someone else already made it, so you

540
00:30:36,160 --> 00:30:38,760
Speaker 5: can just like play what's on the page without having

541
00:30:38,800 --> 00:30:41,160
Speaker 5: to worry about like making stuff up by yourself. And

542
00:30:41,200 --> 00:30:43,320
Speaker 5: then creating music is like the opposite, where you don't

543
00:30:43,320 --> 00:30:45,760
Speaker 5: have to worry about being able to play whatever you're writing.

544
00:30:45,920 --> 00:30:48,000
Speaker 5: You can just write the craziest shit and worry about

545
00:30:48,000 --> 00:30:48,800
Speaker 5: someone else playing it.

546
00:30:49,160 --> 00:30:51,680
Speaker 1: But so you never just sit down on that piano

547
00:30:51,720 --> 00:30:54,520
Speaker 1: when you're just like jamming out, making fucking noises and

548
00:30:54,600 --> 00:30:57,760
Speaker 1: sounds until something sounds like something you like hearing.

549
00:30:58,200 --> 00:31:02,640
Speaker 5: You never do that, really, no, although I have some

550
00:31:02,760 --> 00:31:05,840
Speaker 5: jazz background, so I'm able to kind of improvise, but no,

551
00:31:06,520 --> 00:31:07,440
Speaker 5: but there are people.

552
00:31:07,200 --> 00:31:07,680
Speaker 1: Who do that.

553
00:31:07,760 --> 00:31:07,960
Speaker 5: You know.

554
00:31:08,600 --> 00:31:12,080
Speaker 1: That's so interesting because I have like crazy ADHD and

555
00:31:12,160 --> 00:31:14,520
Speaker 1: I'm like, if I were to, if I if I

556
00:31:14,560 --> 00:31:17,000
Speaker 1: were any good at any musical instrument, I would just

557
00:31:17,040 --> 00:31:20,600
Speaker 1: sit down and fucking just start hitting buttons until something

558
00:31:20,680 --> 00:31:21,840
Speaker 1: did did some you know?

559
00:31:24,000 --> 00:31:27,040
Speaker 5: Yeah, Well I suggest the piano because you don't have

560
00:31:27,080 --> 00:31:29,560
Speaker 5: to worry about producing it sounds like you would on

561
00:31:29,600 --> 00:31:30,800
Speaker 5: the trumpet or something like.

562
00:31:30,920 --> 00:31:32,840
Speaker 4: You just press the key and you kind of just.

563
00:31:32,760 --> 00:31:35,240
Speaker 5: Fuck around and do whatever you want until something sounds good.

564
00:31:35,320 --> 00:31:37,560
Speaker 5: Like you said, so that might be up your alley,

565
00:31:37,760 --> 00:31:37,960
Speaker 5: you know.

566
00:31:40,840 --> 00:31:45,240
Speaker 1: Uh hm hmm. What So you said you left a

567
00:31:45,360 --> 00:31:48,680
Speaker 1: guy to uh come to college.

568
00:31:49,920 --> 00:31:51,040
Speaker 4: You don't want to play the piano?

569
00:31:51,200 --> 00:31:52,760
Speaker 3: Huh what?

570
00:31:52,760 --> 00:31:53,520
Speaker 1: What? What do you mean?

571
00:31:55,360 --> 00:31:56,360
Speaker 4: You changed the topic.

572
00:31:56,440 --> 00:31:58,600
Speaker 5: It's okay, It's like I'm just busting your balls.

573
00:31:59,640 --> 00:32:00,000
Speaker 4: Yeah.

574
00:32:00,320 --> 00:32:03,520
Speaker 5: So, yeah, I was in a pretty long relationship that

575
00:32:03,720 --> 00:32:07,480
Speaker 5: wasn't very great, and I had to gather my resources

576
00:32:07,520 --> 00:32:09,440
Speaker 5: to leave, so I did that and it took a

577
00:32:09,480 --> 00:32:12,200
Speaker 5: long time, and then part of that was getting back

578
00:32:12,200 --> 00:32:12,800
Speaker 5: into college.

579
00:32:12,880 --> 00:32:13,600
Speaker 3: That's what I cool.

580
00:32:14,600 --> 00:32:17,640
Speaker 1: That's cool. Are you Are you going on dates and

581
00:32:17,680 --> 00:32:19,840
Speaker 1: stuff now or are you with to wish someone new?

582
00:32:19,880 --> 00:32:20,800
Speaker 1: It's uh, what's up?

583
00:32:22,560 --> 00:32:24,440
Speaker 5: Not really no, like I said in More and one

584
00:32:24,440 --> 00:32:27,840
Speaker 5: on one. So like you know, there's someone I'm you know,

585
00:32:28,040 --> 00:32:32,840
Speaker 5: associating with, but cool. Yeah, yeah, And I'm fine with

586
00:32:32,880 --> 00:32:35,479
Speaker 5: that because I've had enough, Like after what I've been through,

587
00:32:35,520 --> 00:32:36,080
Speaker 5: I've had enough.

588
00:32:36,560 --> 00:32:39,880
Speaker 1: We love some red hot association. That's very nice.

589
00:32:41,440 --> 00:32:43,240
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, No, connections are great.

590
00:32:44,480 --> 00:32:47,120
Speaker 1: Uh well, I just I still feel bad that I'm

591
00:32:47,120 --> 00:32:48,960
Speaker 1: talking to you because you're in a room full of

592
00:32:49,840 --> 00:32:52,720
Speaker 1: other people that you could talk to. You see your friends.

593
00:32:52,840 --> 00:32:58,760
Speaker 1: You your friend is talking to their friend, but you've

594
00:32:58,840 --> 00:33:01,200
Speaker 1: drawn a line in the same and that your friend's

595
00:33:01,280 --> 00:33:04,280
Speaker 1: friend is not your friend. Why have you? Why have

596
00:33:04,320 --> 00:33:05,400
Speaker 1: you drawn that line?

597
00:33:07,400 --> 00:33:09,080
Speaker 4: Well, I mean for two things.

598
00:33:09,120 --> 00:33:11,920
Speaker 5: I'm when there's a practical like you know, three to crowd,

599
00:33:12,000 --> 00:33:12,720
Speaker 5: and like I.

600
00:33:13,240 --> 00:33:15,080
Speaker 4: I don't know this person, so I don't.

601
00:33:14,840 --> 00:33:17,200
Speaker 5: Know like what I could talk about or bring up

602
00:33:17,200 --> 00:33:20,520
Speaker 5: with them, So it's just like pretty impractical. I ended

603
00:33:20,560 --> 00:33:22,200
Speaker 5: up just I end up just like listening most of

604
00:33:22,240 --> 00:33:22,520
Speaker 5: the time.

605
00:33:22,760 --> 00:33:25,000
Speaker 4: And there's also I forgot.

606
00:33:26,320 --> 00:33:28,560
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, that's just like insecurity of like they don't

607
00:33:28,600 --> 00:33:31,000
Speaker 5: like me, and even if I don't know if they

608
00:33:31,080 --> 00:33:32,760
Speaker 5: like me for sure, I'm just gonna assume they don't

609
00:33:32,840 --> 00:33:35,240
Speaker 5: like me, and you stay away.

610
00:33:36,360 --> 00:33:39,040
Speaker 1: Why can I can I get? Can I go? Can

611
00:33:39,080 --> 00:33:41,160
Speaker 1: I get a little crazy with you for a second?

612
00:33:41,240 --> 00:33:43,240
Speaker 1: Can I go? Can I go a little crazy? Can

613
00:33:43,280 --> 00:33:45,240
Speaker 1: I get? Can I get on my fucking can I get?

614
00:33:45,240 --> 00:33:47,400
Speaker 1: Can I get on my ship with you? Right now?

615
00:33:47,920 --> 00:33:48,200
Speaker 3: Yes?

616
00:33:48,560 --> 00:33:48,920
Speaker 4: Please?

617
00:33:49,040 --> 00:33:49,320
Speaker 3: Please?

618
00:33:49,360 --> 00:33:50,560
Speaker 2: Do? Can I be?

619
00:33:50,800 --> 00:33:52,360
Speaker 1: Can I be a little bit of a crazy man?

620
00:33:54,240 --> 00:33:54,560
Speaker 5: Already?

621
00:33:55,600 --> 00:33:59,239
Speaker 1: Uh? Why do you? Why? Why do you? Why do

622
00:33:59,280 --> 00:34:03,800
Speaker 1: you want? Don't you just assume that you're fine and

623
00:34:03,840 --> 00:34:10,239
Speaker 1: that everything's fine, and just assume that as long as

624
00:34:10,280 --> 00:34:15,640
Speaker 1: you approach these people with positive intent, that they will

625
00:34:15,680 --> 00:34:18,520
Speaker 1: approach you with positive intent, or even if they're dicks,

626
00:34:18,560 --> 00:34:19,840
Speaker 1: it's like who cares, you know.

627
00:34:22,239 --> 00:34:27,520
Speaker 5: Yeah, well that's what I'm working on now. And yeah,

628
00:34:27,560 --> 00:34:31,080
Speaker 5: I think it's more just about like managing my reactions

629
00:34:31,080 --> 00:34:33,600
Speaker 5: to when things get awkward, you know, and just not

630
00:34:33,600 --> 00:34:36,640
Speaker 5: beating myself up too much about it, because like I

631
00:34:37,000 --> 00:34:40,480
Speaker 5: just get really embarrassed, like when things don't go well socially,

632
00:34:40,719 --> 00:34:42,600
Speaker 5: and I'm just like, oh, I should never have opened

633
00:34:42,640 --> 00:34:44,560
Speaker 5: my mouth to that kind of thing. But you know,

634
00:34:44,680 --> 00:34:47,680
Speaker 5: that's something I got to get over because the alternative

635
00:34:47,760 --> 00:34:48,800
Speaker 5: is just like isolation.

636
00:34:49,239 --> 00:34:54,279
Speaker 1: Yea, last night, I was walking around Brooklyn at night.

637
00:34:54,320 --> 00:34:56,560
Speaker 1: I was on my way home from like I went

638
00:34:56,640 --> 00:34:59,279
Speaker 1: to a friend's house, and there was a bunch of

639
00:34:59,280 --> 00:35:06,040
Speaker 1: people standing outside. Hold On, I after sneeze. Waitah, fuck, there's

640
00:35:06,120 --> 00:35:08,160
Speaker 1: a whole lot. Hold on, I have to sneeze again.

641
00:35:08,280 --> 00:35:10,600
Speaker 1: God damn it. I was gonna tell the story and

642
00:35:10,640 --> 00:35:12,359
Speaker 1: I was about I had it out, the whole thing

643
00:35:12,400 --> 00:35:16,520
Speaker 1: in my head, and I'm gonna sneeze. All right, Okay,

644
00:35:16,640 --> 00:35:18,520
Speaker 1: we're keeping this, We're keeping this all in. We can't

645
00:35:18,520 --> 00:35:20,799
Speaker 1: cut this out. There's a there's like a there's like

646
00:35:20,840 --> 00:35:23,160
Speaker 1: a fourth of a sneeze that's still come into me.

647
00:35:23,840 --> 00:35:25,880
Speaker 5: All right, fuck this Fuck okay, I probably have to

648
00:35:25,880 --> 00:35:26,319
Speaker 5: go soon.

649
00:35:26,600 --> 00:35:30,000
Speaker 1: Okay. I was walking through Brooklyn and there were there

650
00:35:30,000 --> 00:35:32,279
Speaker 1: were all these people standing outside of what looked like

651
00:35:32,280 --> 00:35:34,359
Speaker 1: like an art gallery. And I was like, what all

652
00:35:34,360 --> 00:35:37,759
Speaker 1: these people standing outside of an art gallery? Four and

653
00:35:38,000 --> 00:35:41,319
Speaker 1: uh because it's like ten pm and I was like, hey,

654
00:35:41,360 --> 00:35:43,600
Speaker 1: what is there an event going on, and they were like,

655
00:35:44,440 --> 00:35:48,040
Speaker 1: uh yeah, there's like a gallery, there's like an event.

656
00:35:48,320 --> 00:35:51,440
Speaker 1: I was like, oh cool, can I come in because

657
00:35:51,000 --> 00:35:54,520
Speaker 1: I wanted to know what was going on? And they

658
00:35:54,520 --> 00:35:59,600
Speaker 1: were like, they were like, uh no, we're kind of

659
00:35:59,600 --> 00:36:02,759
Speaker 1: winding down. It's kind of like a private thing. And

660
00:36:02,800 --> 00:36:07,200
Speaker 1: I was like, that's cool. How's your guys' night going?

661
00:36:08,360 --> 00:36:09,920
Speaker 1: And they and I could just tell they didn't want

662
00:36:09,920 --> 00:36:12,560
Speaker 1: I could tell they didn't want to they didn't want

663
00:36:12,600 --> 00:36:14,040
Speaker 1: to talk to me, and so I do. And not

664
00:36:14,120 --> 00:36:15,759
Speaker 1: by the way, when they could tell that someone doesn't

665
00:36:15,760 --> 00:36:18,759
Speaker 1: want to talk to me on media, I'm pretty I

666
00:36:18,800 --> 00:36:20,160
Speaker 1: can just be like, all right, that's cool. I'm just

667
00:36:20,200 --> 00:36:23,040
Speaker 1: gonna leave. But I left, and I was like, you know,

668
00:36:23,160 --> 00:36:25,920
Speaker 1: that was like, on paper, embarrassing, but I wasn't embarrassed

669
00:36:25,960 --> 00:36:29,960
Speaker 1: by it at all, because look, here's the thing. In

670
00:36:30,040 --> 00:36:33,760
Speaker 1: another universe. I go up to a group of people

671
00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:35,879
Speaker 1: standing outside of an art gallery and I'm like, what's

672
00:36:35,920 --> 00:36:38,440
Speaker 1: going on? And they're like, hey, man, we'rever the party

673
00:36:38,440 --> 00:36:40,640
Speaker 1: fucking come on in. Life's great. What's your name? How

674
00:36:40,680 --> 00:36:41,840
Speaker 1: you doing? How's life?

675
00:36:42,120 --> 00:36:42,359
Speaker 3: Right?

676
00:36:43,920 --> 00:36:44,160
Speaker 2: Yeah?

677
00:36:44,400 --> 00:36:47,919
Speaker 1: But but but but if I don't become the kind

678
00:36:47,920 --> 00:36:50,440
Speaker 1: of person and take confidence in being the kind of

679
00:36:50,480 --> 00:36:54,160
Speaker 1: person that at the very least puts himself out there

680
00:36:54,800 --> 00:36:58,160
Speaker 1: for interactions like that to happen. If I don't become

681
00:36:58,160 --> 00:37:00,279
Speaker 1: a person that does that because I'm afraid of how

682
00:37:00,280 --> 00:37:05,960
Speaker 1: people might react, you know, I I I close myself

683
00:37:06,000 --> 00:37:09,960
Speaker 1: off to uh social connections and adventures that I would

684
00:37:09,960 --> 00:37:14,040
Speaker 1: have had had otherwise had I been more more brave.

685
00:37:14,239 --> 00:37:19,080
Speaker 1: And so I don't really mind if that particular instance

686
00:37:20,160 --> 00:37:24,040
Speaker 1: I didn't work out. I'm not embarrassed by that. I'm

687
00:37:24,040 --> 00:37:26,920
Speaker 1: not ashamed of that. I'm quite the opposite. I'm actually

688
00:37:27,800 --> 00:37:31,960
Speaker 1: happy with myself that I that I, uh put myself

689
00:37:31,960 --> 00:37:34,240
Speaker 1: out there and in that regard, and so I I

690
00:37:34,239 --> 00:37:37,320
Speaker 1: I hope, I hope you. I hope you understood I

691
00:37:37,360 --> 00:37:40,560
Speaker 1: guess what I just said and that it uh.

692
00:37:40,080 --> 00:37:44,600
Speaker 5: Made just real quick because I do understand you got

693
00:37:44,600 --> 00:37:44,759
Speaker 5: to go.

694
00:37:46,760 --> 00:37:48,279
Speaker 4: Literally myself like a minute or so.

695
00:37:48,360 --> 00:37:51,520
Speaker 5: But like, uh, I agree, And I'm actually more likely

696
00:37:51,600 --> 00:37:53,760
Speaker 5: to talk to strangers like while I'm out and about,

697
00:37:53,840 --> 00:37:55,719
Speaker 5: Like it's I think it's just the pressure of like,

698
00:37:55,840 --> 00:37:58,200
Speaker 5: you know, that people know me. So like when I

699
00:37:58,200 --> 00:38:00,480
Speaker 5: can talk to strangers and I actually talk to stranger

700
00:38:00,560 --> 00:38:02,319
Speaker 5: strangers when I'm like on the train and stuff and

701
00:38:02,320 --> 00:38:04,799
Speaker 5: to make conversation and I like it and it's fun

702
00:38:04,840 --> 00:38:07,640
Speaker 5: and like you said, like the opposite like outcome could

703
00:38:07,680 --> 00:38:10,120
Speaker 5: happen where like they welcome you in and shit. And

704
00:38:10,320 --> 00:38:11,920
Speaker 5: I've had that kind of stuff happen to me, like

705
00:38:12,000 --> 00:38:14,440
Speaker 5: especially since running away, and it's like been really cool

706
00:38:15,320 --> 00:38:17,279
Speaker 5: and like I can actually live and I've you know,

707
00:38:17,400 --> 00:38:20,160
Speaker 5: I've learned that like people aren't actually that bad like strangers.

708
00:38:20,200 --> 00:38:22,319
Speaker 5: You know, they're mostly like you and me. It's just

709
00:38:22,320 --> 00:38:24,120
Speaker 5: that gamble of like are they a murderer or not?

710
00:38:25,000 --> 00:38:27,000
Speaker 5: But other than that, like people are fine to talk to.

711
00:38:27,960 --> 00:38:30,880
Speaker 5: I've made like plenty of friends that are strangers and

712
00:38:30,920 --> 00:38:32,799
Speaker 5: I love it. And I think it's really just like

713
00:38:32,840 --> 00:38:33,879
Speaker 5: the pressure of like.

714
00:38:34,760 --> 00:38:36,480
Speaker 4: Maintaining a rapport with people.

715
00:38:36,840 --> 00:38:38,440
Speaker 5: That's when the social anxiety comes in.

716
00:38:39,760 --> 00:38:44,480
Speaker 1: Well, what's your name again, Joe Anne? Joanne? I know

717
00:38:44,520 --> 00:38:46,319
Speaker 1: you got some basoons to play, so I'm gonna let

718
00:38:46,360 --> 00:38:47,640
Speaker 1: you go. Is there anything else you want to say

719
00:38:47,640 --> 00:38:49,160
Speaker 1: to the people of the computer before we go?

720
00:38:50,800 --> 00:38:53,000
Speaker 5: A couple of things. Well, first, I want to say

721
00:38:53,000 --> 00:38:56,480
Speaker 5: completely platonically and because of how like great you've had it,

722
00:38:56,719 --> 00:38:58,920
Speaker 5: like the impact you've had on people and myself like

723
00:38:58,960 --> 00:39:00,560
Speaker 5: I love you like, thank you how much?

724
00:39:02,000 --> 00:39:05,360
Speaker 4: Yeah, and also try to lay off the weed.

725
00:39:06,320 --> 00:39:07,520
Speaker 5: It's it's better if you do.

726
00:39:08,280 --> 00:39:10,600
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go smoke weed right fucking now, just because

727
00:39:10,600 --> 00:39:11,040
Speaker 1: you said that.

728
00:39:12,600 --> 00:39:14,640
Speaker 4: When you're ready, you're ready, you'll you'll.

729
00:39:14,400 --> 00:39:17,480
Speaker 1: Give it up, all right, Thank you very much, Joanna.

730
00:39:17,440 --> 00:39:18,000
Speaker 1: I have a good night.

731
00:39:19,520 --> 00:39:21,000
Speaker 5: It's so bye bye bye bye.

732
00:39:21,520 --> 00:39:23,600
Speaker 1: Listen, man, here's the thing. I don't play the bassoon

733
00:39:24,520 --> 00:39:27,520
Speaker 1: or any other woodwind instrument, so I can get high

734
00:39:27,560 --> 00:39:32,640
Speaker 1: all I want and it won't impact my life at all,

735
00:39:32,680 --> 00:39:36,960
Speaker 1: except for the fact that it is destroying my brain

736
00:39:37,120 --> 00:39:40,840
Speaker 1: and my giving me a lot of anxiety and memory

737
00:39:40,840 --> 00:39:43,919
Speaker 1: loss and making me eat four thousand calories a day.

738
00:39:43,960 --> 00:39:48,360
Speaker 1: But other than that, it's totally fine. Hello.

739
00:39:48,880 --> 00:39:49,960
Speaker 3: What's going on? Man?

740
00:39:51,200 --> 00:39:56,799
Speaker 1: Hi there, sir? What is your name? My name is Antonio, Antonio.

741
00:39:56,880 --> 00:39:58,359
Speaker 1: What's going on? How can I get you today?

742
00:39:58,400 --> 00:39:58,560
Speaker 2: Sir?

743
00:40:00,320 --> 00:40:01,120
Speaker 3: Uh?

744
00:40:01,160 --> 00:40:04,319
Speaker 2: You know, just uh, We're gonna say the usual kind

745
00:40:04,320 --> 00:40:10,560
Speaker 2: of bullshit, you know, a long time listener, first time caller. Uh? Yeah, man,

746
00:40:10,760 --> 00:40:13,600
Speaker 2: just want to chime in about life. Just see what's

747
00:40:13,600 --> 00:40:16,880
Speaker 2: you know, get a little bit of a get advice

748
00:40:16,960 --> 00:40:17,640
Speaker 2: if possible.

749
00:40:18,080 --> 00:40:21,720
Speaker 1: You want to chime in about life. Well, go ahead,

750
00:40:21,760 --> 00:40:22,960
Speaker 1: Surfloor's years.

751
00:40:24,640 --> 00:40:25,120
Speaker 3: All right.

752
00:40:25,400 --> 00:40:28,880
Speaker 2: Well, uh shit, I mean, what do I ever begin

753
00:40:29,000 --> 00:40:32,360
Speaker 2: to be honest?

754
00:40:32,600 --> 00:40:32,759
Speaker 3: Uh?

755
00:40:33,560 --> 00:40:36,480
Speaker 2: Well, I'm a bartender, been in the service industry for

756
00:40:36,520 --> 00:40:40,120
Speaker 2: about like ten eleven years right now, and I'm trying

757
00:40:40,160 --> 00:40:42,440
Speaker 2: to break out of the industry, but I'm kind of

758
00:40:42,560 --> 00:40:46,320
Speaker 2: stuck within this stupid little self deprecating cycle of mine,

759
00:40:46,400 --> 00:40:50,640
Speaker 2: which is a hello, annoying to say the least.

760
00:40:52,320 --> 00:40:53,000
Speaker 1: Tell us more.

761
00:40:54,960 --> 00:40:58,399
Speaker 2: Well, Uh, you know, I've been, like I said, been

762
00:40:58,400 --> 00:41:00,839
Speaker 2: doing this about like ten eleven years now right now.

763
00:41:01,000 --> 00:41:05,360
Speaker 2: Work in a hotel, like a bar hotel, like really

764
00:41:05,400 --> 00:41:08,640
Speaker 2: like the heart of uh Chicago. I live in Chicago.

765
00:41:09,600 --> 00:41:14,880
Speaker 2: Uh it's cool enough, but uh, ever since COVID, like

766
00:41:15,000 --> 00:41:19,239
Speaker 2: the service industry has just been like fucking garbage. It's

767
00:41:19,280 --> 00:41:24,080
Speaker 2: just a bunch of like good people left and a

768
00:41:24,120 --> 00:41:27,799
Speaker 2: bunch of new people took over, and nobody knows what

769
00:41:27,880 --> 00:41:30,720
Speaker 2: they're doing, and they're just hiring a bunch of green

770
00:41:30,760 --> 00:41:33,120
Speaker 2: ass people that don't know what they're doing neither. And

771
00:41:33,160 --> 00:41:38,000
Speaker 2: it's just a fucking best And I'm trying to get out,

772
00:41:38,120 --> 00:41:42,959
Speaker 2: man Like, it's like it's weird. Uh, It's it's cool

773
00:41:43,000 --> 00:41:45,959
Speaker 2: because if you know, I keep a roof over over

774
00:41:46,000 --> 00:41:47,640
Speaker 2: my head. You know, I take care of my son

775
00:41:47,719 --> 00:41:49,719
Speaker 2: and shit like that, but it sucks so like I'm

776
00:41:49,760 --> 00:41:51,600
Speaker 2: trying to break in a voice of a work of

777
00:41:51,719 --> 00:41:55,960
Speaker 2: voice acting. But uh, it's just hard to like find

778
00:41:56,120 --> 00:41:59,080
Speaker 2: like the motivation and like the focus, you know what

779
00:41:59,120 --> 00:42:00,960
Speaker 2: I mean. I can deal with a bunch of drunken

780
00:42:01,000 --> 00:42:02,600
Speaker 2: assholes not stop all day.

781
00:42:04,440 --> 00:42:08,440
Speaker 1: How old are you? I'm thirty four, thirty four, And

782
00:42:08,480 --> 00:42:09,359
Speaker 1: how old are your son?

783
00:42:11,400 --> 00:42:14,400
Speaker 2: Actually he's going to be turning eleven September twenty seventh.

784
00:42:14,920 --> 00:42:18,200
Speaker 1: Oh very cool. Are you just you supporting him or

785
00:42:18,200 --> 00:42:20,480
Speaker 1: do you have a partner of some kinds?

786
00:42:21,200 --> 00:42:24,279
Speaker 2: Well, his mother, you know him and his mother. They

787
00:42:24,320 --> 00:42:27,840
Speaker 2: live in Michigan. So I get him every other weekend.

788
00:42:28,200 --> 00:42:30,160
Speaker 2: I was supposed to get him this weekend, but she

789
00:42:30,239 --> 00:42:32,680
Speaker 2: had complications with her car. So I'm like, all right, man,

790
00:42:32,719 --> 00:42:34,000
Speaker 2: it's it's whatever, you know.

791
00:42:35,160 --> 00:42:36,319
Speaker 1: So she's in Michigan. Where are you.

792
00:42:37,600 --> 00:42:38,440
Speaker 3: I'm in Chicago?

793
00:42:39,320 --> 00:42:42,960
Speaker 1: Okay, oh my god, Oh don't make me do this.

794
00:42:42,960 --> 00:42:45,640
Speaker 1: All right, hold on, I'm in front of a computer. Okay,

795
00:42:45,719 --> 00:42:48,000
Speaker 1: I'm glad you're doing that much a fucking idiot, I am.

796
00:42:48,000 --> 00:42:51,840
Speaker 1: Hold on, I feel like those are dude. For a second,

797
00:42:51,880 --> 00:42:54,440
Speaker 1: I was like, wait, Chicago's in Michigan, right, And I

798
00:42:54,480 --> 00:42:58,480
Speaker 1: was like, no, okay, all right, all right, okay, yes

799
00:42:58,560 --> 00:43:00,839
Speaker 1: these are these are two places that are close by

800
00:43:00,880 --> 00:43:07,560
Speaker 1: to each other. I'm a fucking all right anyway anyway, okay,

801
00:43:07,760 --> 00:43:12,400
Speaker 1: So hmmm, so you've been in service industry for eleven

802
00:43:12,480 --> 00:43:16,759
Speaker 1: years trying to break out to do voice acting. I

803
00:43:16,800 --> 00:43:22,640
Speaker 1: mean this sounds like it's a financial quoting, you know,

804
00:43:22,880 --> 00:43:25,320
Speaker 1: because everything gets a little bit harder when you got

805
00:43:26,000 --> 00:43:29,920
Speaker 1: like a kid to support, you know, are you are you?

806
00:43:30,280 --> 00:43:31,040
Speaker 1: Are you out here?

807
00:43:31,080 --> 00:43:31,160
Speaker 2: Like?

808
00:43:31,200 --> 00:43:33,279
Speaker 1: Are you out here? Like how do I make enough

809
00:43:33,320 --> 00:43:39,200
Speaker 1: money off of my succulent wind pipes to uh to

810
00:43:39,239 --> 00:43:41,400
Speaker 1: support my son and eat food and ship?

811
00:43:43,000 --> 00:43:45,840
Speaker 2: Never got that before, but I like that circular windpipe

812
00:43:45,840 --> 00:43:49,239
Speaker 2: all right. Now it's more so just like I don't

813
00:43:49,239 --> 00:43:51,040
Speaker 2: know what it is to be honest, man, because like

814
00:43:53,080 --> 00:43:55,560
Speaker 2: how can I how can I put it? Like like

815
00:43:55,640 --> 00:43:58,080
Speaker 2: I'm good, you know what I mean? And like, uh,

816
00:43:58,719 --> 00:44:02,239
Speaker 2: I just uh moved to my own spot. I got

817
00:44:02,239 --> 00:44:05,160
Speaker 2: out of like a super toxic relationship that I was

818
00:44:05,200 --> 00:44:10,759
Speaker 2: in for like fucking like six seven years. COVID prolonged that, unfortunately,

819
00:44:10,840 --> 00:44:14,279
Speaker 2: because everything shut down but finally got out, I got

820
00:44:14,320 --> 00:44:16,759
Speaker 2: all my shit together within like a month or two,

821
00:44:16,800 --> 00:44:19,040
Speaker 2: you know what I mean, and to spend a pretty penny.

822
00:44:19,080 --> 00:44:22,440
Speaker 2: But I'm definitely more content, more peaceful now, you know.

823
00:44:22,640 --> 00:44:25,200
Speaker 2: My whole thing was like all right, like maybe now

824
00:44:25,239 --> 00:44:28,399
Speaker 2: that I'm alone that I'm like doing my own thing,

825
00:44:28,440 --> 00:44:31,399
Speaker 2: I can like focus on what I got to do.

826
00:44:31,480 --> 00:44:33,879
Speaker 2: But then by the time, you know, and to deal

827
00:44:33,960 --> 00:44:37,440
Speaker 2: with the little silly ass shenanigans at work and all

828
00:44:37,480 --> 00:44:39,480
Speaker 2: the other shit, by the time I finally get home,

829
00:44:39,480 --> 00:44:43,279
Speaker 2: it's like I'm like depleted. And then what I mean

830
00:44:43,280 --> 00:44:46,640
Speaker 2: by like self deprecating cycle, it's like I'll.

831
00:44:46,400 --> 00:44:49,960
Speaker 3: Be home or I'll be off like today, and it's

832
00:44:50,000 --> 00:44:53,400
Speaker 3: like all right, let me, you know, put away everything,

833
00:44:53,560 --> 00:44:54,640
Speaker 3: like turn.

834
00:44:54,520 --> 00:44:56,440
Speaker 2: My phone on. We focused and like do what I

835
00:44:56,440 --> 00:44:59,880
Speaker 2: gotta do. But there's like no like push or drive,

836
00:45:00,239 --> 00:45:04,520
Speaker 2: which in return upsets me a little bit because it's like, dude,

837
00:45:04,680 --> 00:45:07,879
Speaker 2: why you got to be like that? And then it's

838
00:45:07,880 --> 00:45:11,040
Speaker 2: like I'm even more pissed on myself because I'm kind

839
00:45:11,080 --> 00:45:14,640
Speaker 2: of like felf reflecting at the same time and like

840
00:45:14,800 --> 00:45:18,880
Speaker 2: noticing it from like a outer perspective, which in result

841
00:45:19,200 --> 00:45:21,600
Speaker 2: pisses me off even more because it's like, my guy,

842
00:45:21,800 --> 00:45:24,160
Speaker 2: why you got to do this to yourself? Like I'm

843
00:45:24,200 --> 00:45:27,080
Speaker 2: pretty hard on myself. So it's just like a constant,

844
00:45:27,120 --> 00:45:28,120
Speaker 2: fucking like loop.

845
00:45:29,640 --> 00:45:32,160
Speaker 3: And it's like, so if I.

846
00:45:32,120 --> 00:45:34,439
Speaker 1: Were, if I were to summarize everything you just said

847
00:45:34,480 --> 00:45:39,759
Speaker 1: in five words, it's why can't I lock in? There?

848
00:45:39,880 --> 00:45:41,399
Speaker 3: Yeah? You know, yeah, there you go.

849
00:45:41,440 --> 00:45:44,759
Speaker 1: Why can't you're trying to lock in? So you were

850
00:45:44,760 --> 00:45:48,319
Speaker 1: all right, so you were in the bad relationship and

851
00:45:48,480 --> 00:45:50,360
Speaker 1: you got out of it and you got your own place,

852
00:45:50,800 --> 00:45:54,160
Speaker 1: and then you were like all right, uh now and

853
00:45:54,200 --> 00:45:55,360
Speaker 1: then and then you were like, all right, now that

854
00:45:55,400 --> 00:45:58,640
Speaker 1: I'm alone, now that I don't have I'm not wayed

855
00:45:58,640 --> 00:46:01,920
Speaker 1: down by this this thing, I can lock in right.

856
00:46:03,160 --> 00:46:03,359
Speaker 3: Yeah.

857
00:46:03,680 --> 00:46:05,799
Speaker 1: It's kind of cool, by the way, I experience this

858
00:46:05,880 --> 00:46:09,040
Speaker 1: all the time. I experienced this all the time where

859
00:46:09,080 --> 00:46:10,960
Speaker 1: it's like you have some kind of I don't know

860
00:46:10,960 --> 00:46:13,719
Speaker 1: what that noise was, where you have some kind of

861
00:46:13,800 --> 00:46:18,920
Speaker 1: like thing externally in your life that you get to

862
00:46:18,960 --> 00:46:21,839
Speaker 1: point at and you get to go, well, okay, I

863
00:46:21,880 --> 00:46:25,799
Speaker 1: would lock in, but I got this external thing, and

864
00:46:26,320 --> 00:46:29,400
Speaker 1: I can just delay my locking in until this external

865
00:46:29,440 --> 00:46:32,680
Speaker 1: thing is gone, and then what happens with that fail

866
00:46:32,800 --> 00:46:34,960
Speaker 1: every time. Maybe not every time. Actually, I'll give it

867
00:46:34,960 --> 00:46:37,960
Speaker 1: to some external things. Some external things can genuinely be

868
00:46:38,120 --> 00:46:41,920
Speaker 1: blocks to locking in. A lot of them can. But

869
00:46:41,920 --> 00:46:43,439
Speaker 1: but it's like you, I don't know where the line

870
00:46:43,480 --> 00:46:47,000
Speaker 1: is between it being a genuine block and it being

871
00:46:47,120 --> 00:46:50,160
Speaker 1: kind of a scapegoat, because I don't know. For me,

872
00:46:50,200 --> 00:46:55,760
Speaker 1: it's like anytime, anytime I do have that time, I'm

873
00:46:55,840 --> 00:46:59,360
Speaker 1: still faced with the same problems of that are preventing

874
00:46:59,360 --> 00:47:03,480
Speaker 1: me from locking in, that that are not cured by

875
00:47:03,480 --> 00:47:05,799
Speaker 1: the removal of external thing. I don't have any of

876
00:47:05,840 --> 00:47:08,000
Speaker 1: what I just said made any sense. But what are

877
00:47:08,040 --> 00:47:09,520
Speaker 1: you trying to lock in? What do you what are

878
00:47:09,560 --> 00:47:10,600
Speaker 1: you trying to lock in to do?

879
00:47:12,880 --> 00:47:13,000
Speaker 3: Uh?

880
00:47:13,680 --> 00:47:14,839
Speaker 1: Like what does locking in mean?

881
00:47:16,800 --> 00:47:19,080
Speaker 2: At least for me, just locking in it's just like

882
00:47:19,120 --> 00:47:24,120
Speaker 2: you know, just getting out of my own fucking dumb

883
00:47:24,160 --> 00:47:27,800
Speaker 2: ass edn't mind it, Just like yo, like stop like procrastinating,

884
00:47:27,840 --> 00:47:28,399
Speaker 2: stop like.

885
00:47:28,400 --> 00:47:33,000
Speaker 3: You know, like letting all this other like just strength.

886
00:47:32,719 --> 00:47:35,280
Speaker 2: And anxiety of like the world and being a father

887
00:47:35,440 --> 00:47:38,160
Speaker 2: and doing this and doing that, like way the fuck down,

888
00:47:38,320 --> 00:47:41,840
Speaker 2: Like stop bugging out. If it's like do what you

889
00:47:41,920 --> 00:47:44,640
Speaker 2: gotta do, because like I'm kind of at the point

890
00:47:44,640 --> 00:47:45,960
Speaker 2: in my life, you know what I'm saying with like

891
00:47:46,040 --> 00:47:51,520
Speaker 2: I'm over like just servicing people and working for people

892
00:47:51,600 --> 00:47:54,480
Speaker 2: who fucking suck, you know what I mean. And that's

893
00:47:54,520 --> 00:47:56,520
Speaker 2: like the one thing that like I really don't want

894
00:47:56,560 --> 00:47:59,000
Speaker 2: to do because you know, like I was saying, like

895
00:47:59,040 --> 00:48:01,080
Speaker 2: COVID kind of screwed up the service industry like in

896
00:48:01,160 --> 00:48:03,600
Speaker 2: a home, you know, like it completely fucked it up.

897
00:48:03,920 --> 00:48:07,759
Speaker 2: You know, my cop I've worked with him like in

898
00:48:07,920 --> 00:48:09,839
Speaker 2: other places and mind you, like I've worked in like

899
00:48:10,040 --> 00:48:12,720
Speaker 2: michilin Star places I've worked in like little hole.

900
00:48:12,600 --> 00:48:14,520
Speaker 3: In the walls that like nobody gives a shit about.

901
00:48:15,120 --> 00:48:17,919
Speaker 2: And I got it. I got my cousin the job

902
00:48:18,000 --> 00:48:20,240
Speaker 2: or where I'm at, and they did him.

903
00:48:20,640 --> 00:48:26,200
Speaker 3: Super bogus, and uh you know that same year.

904
00:48:26,280 --> 00:48:28,359
Speaker 2: It's like probably two years ago because I've been at

905
00:48:28,360 --> 00:48:30,640
Speaker 2: the same place for like seven years now. Like two

906
00:48:30,680 --> 00:48:32,480
Speaker 2: years ago when like I got him in where I'm

907
00:48:32,520 --> 00:48:36,160
Speaker 2: at and like they did a bogus. He hopped around

908
00:48:36,280 --> 00:48:40,279
Speaker 2: like literally like seven or eight different like bars and restaurants.

909
00:48:41,000 --> 00:48:43,080
Speaker 2: It was the same thing, like hey man, like come

910
00:48:43,120 --> 00:48:45,000
Speaker 2: through like it's felt the money's good. Then like a

911
00:48:45,000 --> 00:48:48,160
Speaker 2: month or two later, hop management sucks. They fucked me over.

912
00:48:48,200 --> 00:48:51,200
Speaker 2: I'm at this new place. Come here another month later,

913
00:48:51,640 --> 00:48:53,760
Speaker 2: they fucked up my hours. I'm at this other place.

914
00:48:53,760 --> 00:48:56,680
Speaker 2: So it's like I don't want to have to hop

915
00:48:56,880 --> 00:48:59,560
Speaker 2: from like bar to bar, dop a job to bank

916
00:48:59,719 --> 00:49:01,960
Speaker 2: and be to make a living type ship, you know.

917
00:49:02,080 --> 00:49:04,440
Speaker 2: So like my whole thing is like, is if I

918
00:49:04,440 --> 00:49:07,040
Speaker 2: can get this voice acting like voiceover works like off

919
00:49:07,040 --> 00:49:10,840
Speaker 2: the ground, like I want that to be kind of

920
00:49:10,880 --> 00:49:13,400
Speaker 2: like more like of my main like source of income

921
00:49:13,760 --> 00:49:16,400
Speaker 2: because in that case, like I can work wherever and

922
00:49:16,440 --> 00:49:18,800
Speaker 2: it wouldn't have to bother me that much, but also

923
00:49:18,920 --> 00:49:22,560
Speaker 2: hopefully give me a little bit more free time on

924
00:49:22,640 --> 00:49:24,600
Speaker 2: my hand, so I can spend some more time with

925
00:49:24,640 --> 00:49:26,680
Speaker 2: my ship. Because I got a flight and I got

926
00:49:26,680 --> 00:49:28,640
Speaker 2: all that other stuff. I just take that forever.

927
00:49:29,640 --> 00:49:32,640
Speaker 1: Sure. Well, here's the thing. I have no idea how

928
00:49:32,680 --> 00:49:36,520
Speaker 1: one goes about pursuing a career in voiceover work. If

929
00:49:36,520 --> 00:49:38,400
Speaker 1: I were you, I would reach out to people who

930
00:49:38,520 --> 00:49:42,880
Speaker 1: have careers and voiceover work, and uh I would I

931
00:49:42,920 --> 00:49:45,560
Speaker 1: would see, you know, with their with their advice. Is

932
00:49:46,880 --> 00:49:48,640
Speaker 1: but you're talking you're talking about you're talking about trying

933
00:49:48,640 --> 00:49:52,960
Speaker 1: to start a business to replace your job. The upstart

934
00:49:53,080 --> 00:49:57,000
Speaker 1: of doing that, unfortunately, is gonna be like crazy, you know,

935
00:49:57,200 --> 00:49:59,600
Speaker 1: because the amount of the amount of hours are gonna

936
00:49:59,640 --> 00:50:01,799
Speaker 1: put into that is a lot. I don't think you

937
00:50:01,800 --> 00:50:04,480
Speaker 1: shouldn't do it. I think it's worth it to do it.

938
00:50:04,520 --> 00:50:08,080
Speaker 1: But I mean, if that's what I would do, and

939
00:50:08,080 --> 00:50:10,440
Speaker 1: I would go find people who actually are doing this

940
00:50:10,480 --> 00:50:14,040
Speaker 1: for a living and see what their advice is. I mean,

941
00:50:14,080 --> 00:50:17,840
Speaker 1: you gotta make tiktoks and Instagrams, and you gotta make tiktoks,

942
00:50:17,880 --> 00:50:20,920
Speaker 1: you gotta make instagrams, you gotta make YouTube videos.

943
00:50:22,000 --> 00:50:25,040
Speaker 2: People. I've had people tell me that shit like a lot,

944
00:50:25,080 --> 00:50:28,560
Speaker 2: and like because where I work at like it's like

945
00:50:28,680 --> 00:50:30,719
Speaker 2: I work like at the heart of downtown, so like

946
00:50:30,800 --> 00:50:33,160
Speaker 2: I beat tons of people and like I met famous

947
00:50:33,160 --> 00:50:35,600
Speaker 2: people and stuff. I'm taking care of them. Like I

948
00:50:35,600 --> 00:50:38,680
Speaker 2: got to be Thundercat. He was cool as shit, earl sweatshirt.

949
00:50:39,360 --> 00:50:42,160
Speaker 2: I don't know if you've see Tokyo Drift, but the

950
00:50:42,200 --> 00:50:45,000
Speaker 2: bad dudes from Tokyo Drift, Drift King, I got to take.

951
00:50:44,800 --> 00:50:46,919
Speaker 3: Care of him and his wife. They were super nice.

952
00:50:46,960 --> 00:50:49,360
Speaker 1: By the way, you met the Drift King. Actually I

953
00:50:49,360 --> 00:50:50,879
Speaker 1: don't know who that is, but he just sounds cool.

954
00:50:52,480 --> 00:50:54,600
Speaker 1: Go ahead and and what did all these people tell you?

955
00:50:55,560 --> 00:50:58,239
Speaker 3: Well, the same thing, Like yo, just like do it?

956
00:50:58,320 --> 00:50:58,879
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying.

957
00:50:58,920 --> 00:51:01,360
Speaker 3: Like I've met this one guy from UH to some

958
00:51:01,600 --> 00:51:02,800
Speaker 3: you know, random white dude.

959
00:51:03,080 --> 00:51:07,879
Speaker 2: He told me that he did marketing advertisement for Mercedes

960
00:51:07,920 --> 00:51:10,759
Speaker 2: for about like thirty years, like he was retired. And

961
00:51:10,800 --> 00:51:13,000
Speaker 2: I told him how during COVID, I was on this

962
00:51:13,560 --> 00:51:15,840
Speaker 2: site called voices dot com. It's like a LinkedIn for

963
00:51:15,920 --> 00:51:19,520
Speaker 2: voiceover artists, but like how it was like a Hello weird.

964
00:51:19,600 --> 00:51:22,480
Speaker 2: The structure was, it's like a five hundred dollars annual feed.

965
00:51:23,320 --> 00:51:25,800
Speaker 2: You get paid every Friday if you do gigs, but

966
00:51:26,000 --> 00:51:29,920
Speaker 2: they take a twenty percent platform feed. And you know,

967
00:51:30,000 --> 00:51:32,120
Speaker 2: I get emailed all these jobs, but some of them

968
00:51:32,160 --> 00:51:34,840
Speaker 2: wouldn't even pertain to like be specifically because it's like,

969
00:51:35,680 --> 00:51:37,120
Speaker 2: be real, I don't think you want to hear this

970
00:51:37,200 --> 00:51:39,600
Speaker 2: type of voice of like a Gerberg commercial or anything

971
00:51:39,680 --> 00:51:43,399
Speaker 2: like that, you know what I mean. And he's he's like, yo,

972
00:51:43,600 --> 00:51:45,960
Speaker 2: like that's cool now, but what you need to do

973
00:51:46,840 --> 00:51:49,040
Speaker 2: get you make yourself a demo reel and find yourself

974
00:51:49,040 --> 00:51:51,080
Speaker 2: an agency to represent you. That way they can do

975
00:51:51,120 --> 00:51:52,960
Speaker 2: all the grub works for you. He's like, yeah, you'll

976
00:51:52,960 --> 00:51:54,600
Speaker 2: still have to break them off some money, like you know,

977
00:51:54,640 --> 00:51:57,560
Speaker 2: because obviously like they need their cut, but they can

978
00:51:57,600 --> 00:52:00,400
Speaker 2: find things specifically tailored for your voice and that you

979
00:52:00,440 --> 00:52:02,920
Speaker 2: build a portfolio and a repertoire widow so they can

980
00:52:03,000 --> 00:52:05,799
Speaker 2: recommend you to other things and other avenues that's more

981
00:52:05,840 --> 00:52:08,759
Speaker 2: tailored for you and the way that you stun So

982
00:52:08,880 --> 00:52:11,600
Speaker 2: I do got a real like that I got to

983
00:52:11,640 --> 00:52:14,200
Speaker 2: fix up and everything. But a lot of the agencies

984
00:52:14,200 --> 00:52:18,960
Speaker 2: that I looked at they want headshots along with like

985
00:52:19,000 --> 00:52:22,520
Speaker 2: the demo reel, and I mean a lot of the

986
00:52:22,520 --> 00:52:24,520
Speaker 2: other players I've looked at headshots are at least like

987
00:52:24,640 --> 00:52:25,960
Speaker 2: four hundred dollars like this.

988
00:52:26,000 --> 00:52:27,320
Speaker 3: For a couple of photos and stuff.

989
00:52:27,360 --> 00:52:29,080
Speaker 2: So I think it's more so just kind of like

990
00:52:29,120 --> 00:52:32,239
Speaker 2: preparing my pockets for this amount of money out by

991
00:52:32,320 --> 00:52:35,319
Speaker 2: the drop on everything, you know. But it's still just

992
00:52:35,360 --> 00:52:37,840
Speaker 2: like a weird mental block. It's like, yo, like why

993
00:52:39,280 --> 00:52:43,839
Speaker 2: why I gotta be stupid? Why can't what's the deal?

994
00:52:44,200 --> 00:52:47,879
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, Let's see someone. I try

995
00:52:47,920 --> 00:52:49,480
Speaker 1: not to look at the chat while I'm on the calls,

996
00:52:49,480 --> 00:52:51,439
Speaker 1: but someone said, ghek, you got to tell this guy

997
00:52:51,600 --> 00:52:56,120
Speaker 1: about people who do spicy audio on OnlyFans.

998
00:52:57,400 --> 00:53:01,719
Speaker 2: Yeah, my ex recommended that to me. She's like, dude,

999
00:53:01,760 --> 00:53:04,960
Speaker 2: you don't even gotta show your face or like show anything,

1000
00:53:05,040 --> 00:53:08,960
Speaker 2: just fucking talk and say something like people would eat

1001
00:53:09,000 --> 00:53:09,359
Speaker 2: that up.

1002
00:53:11,840 --> 00:53:14,080
Speaker 1: Listen, Man, I don't know if I have any better

1003
00:53:14,400 --> 00:53:18,600
Speaker 1: random white guy advice than than the other guy. You

1004
00:53:18,719 --> 00:53:20,759
Speaker 1: just gotta do ship, you know, you just gotta just

1005
00:53:20,840 --> 00:53:25,520
Speaker 1: kinda I I I hate saying into a microphone. I

1006
00:53:25,560 --> 00:53:27,759
Speaker 1: hate giving advice, but this is the only thing I

1007
00:53:27,760 --> 00:53:29,759
Speaker 1: can think of. Is you just gotta you gotta do

1008
00:53:29,840 --> 00:53:32,719
Speaker 1: sh it. Man. There's no I'm not a master of

1009
00:53:32,960 --> 00:53:36,080
Speaker 1: I mean, it's adderall. It's cool if you have trouble focusing,

1010
00:53:38,280 --> 00:53:41,400
Speaker 1: but yeah, just you gotta fucking do things. There's no

1011
00:53:41,640 --> 00:53:44,640
Speaker 1: I don't think there's any kind of a secret sauce

1012
00:53:44,719 --> 00:53:48,319
Speaker 1: to it. Uh you know, I mean, I'll say this,

1013
00:53:48,320 --> 00:53:52,799
Speaker 1: this is, this is, this is, this will be my

1014
00:53:53,239 --> 00:53:58,439
Speaker 1: official word to you, good sir.

1015
00:53:59,320 --> 00:53:59,400
Speaker 2: Is.

1016
00:54:00,440 --> 00:54:04,400
Speaker 1: Yes, there's a universe of agents in a backstage and

1017
00:54:04,440 --> 00:54:07,480
Speaker 1: blah blah blah blah blah, and there's things you can

1018
00:54:07,520 --> 00:54:09,960
Speaker 1: apply for and all that stuff. But to me, and

1019
00:54:10,000 --> 00:54:12,080
Speaker 1: I'm just speaking because this is how I was able

1020
00:54:12,080 --> 00:54:15,440
Speaker 1: to do anything with myself is you gotta make tiktoks

1021
00:54:15,440 --> 00:54:18,040
Speaker 1: and Instagrams and you know, build your own social media

1022
00:54:19,960 --> 00:54:26,040
Speaker 1: YouTube universe for yourself, you know, because knocking knocking on

1023
00:54:26,160 --> 00:54:28,360
Speaker 1: doors is one thing, but I think you got to

1024
00:54:28,440 --> 00:54:30,560
Speaker 1: kind of create your own things so that people are

1025
00:54:31,000 --> 00:54:33,480
Speaker 1: knocking on your doors. And as far as how to

1026
00:54:34,719 --> 00:54:38,120
Speaker 1: get over procrastination to lock in to do it, I mean,

1027
00:54:38,440 --> 00:54:42,600
Speaker 1: I got really lucky. My My period of time of

1028
00:54:42,760 --> 00:54:47,160
Speaker 1: locking in was right when the pandemic started, which was

1029
00:54:47,200 --> 00:54:49,160
Speaker 1: the perfect time to lock in because I didn't have

1030
00:54:49,200 --> 00:54:51,960
Speaker 1: any fomo. You know, There's many times I tried to

1031
00:54:52,000 --> 00:54:54,080
Speaker 1: lock in before that where I was like, eh, i'm

1032
00:54:54,200 --> 00:54:57,919
Speaker 1: too I'm distracted by all there is to other other

1033
00:54:57,960 --> 00:55:01,279
Speaker 1: things that are already do in the universe. But I

1034
00:55:01,320 --> 00:55:05,680
Speaker 1: got lucky because that was I experienced it as we

1035
00:55:05,719 --> 00:55:08,600
Speaker 1: all did. You know, we experienced a unique period of

1036
00:55:08,640 --> 00:55:13,040
Speaker 1: time where uh there was literally nothing else to fucking

1037
00:55:13,160 --> 00:55:17,960
Speaker 1: do except except to lock in. So my advice to

1038
00:55:18,000 --> 00:55:22,280
Speaker 1: you is to unleash a global virus onto the universe

1039
00:55:22,680 --> 00:55:27,239
Speaker 1: so that uh literally nothing can distract you. That's what

1040
00:55:27,239 --> 00:55:28,160
Speaker 1: That's what I would say.

1041
00:55:30,200 --> 00:55:33,640
Speaker 2: I get that, man, And yet like, yeah, I know,

1042
00:55:33,680 --> 00:55:36,239
Speaker 2: it's all just internal, man, Like I gotta fucking just

1043
00:55:36,440 --> 00:55:38,160
Speaker 2: get out of my own head about it, you know

1044
00:55:38,160 --> 00:55:40,399
Speaker 2: what I mean. But yeah, like you said, like I bad,

1045
00:55:40,440 --> 00:55:42,839
Speaker 2: other people say the same thing, like bro, just make

1046
00:55:42,840 --> 00:55:44,799
Speaker 2: it TikTok, make it big and just put your shit

1047
00:55:44,840 --> 00:55:46,200
Speaker 2: out there, you know what I mean. But it's all

1048
00:55:46,280 --> 00:55:50,160
Speaker 2: just like internally that like is just blowing me. I

1049
00:55:50,200 --> 00:55:52,440
Speaker 2: guess you could say, which You're just like, Yeah, I

1050
00:55:52,480 --> 00:55:53,880
Speaker 2: just got to get over my own head, of my

1051
00:55:53,920 --> 00:55:54,719
Speaker 2: own thoughts.

1052
00:55:55,520 --> 00:55:59,320
Speaker 1: What's your name again, sir? And does Antonio? Yes, I

1053
00:55:59,440 --> 00:56:03,200
Speaker 1: totally sick. I'm remembering lots of people's names today, Antonio.

1054
00:56:03,520 --> 00:56:04,600
Speaker 1: Is there anything else you want to say to the

1055
00:56:04,600 --> 00:56:05,920
Speaker 1: people of the computer before we go?

1056
00:56:07,760 --> 00:56:12,880
Speaker 2: Uh, it's a beautiful day, man, enjoy yourselves, love one another,

1057
00:56:12,960 --> 00:56:15,360
Speaker 2: and uh should keep keep on trucking.

1058
00:56:15,400 --> 00:56:18,560
Speaker 1: But they have a good night, sir, You too.

1059
00:56:18,680 --> 00:56:19,480
Speaker 2: My dude.

1060
00:56:21,000 --> 00:56:22,880
Speaker 1: Like guy he I mean, he has got a good voice.

1061
00:56:22,960 --> 00:56:28,160
Speaker 1: He's got a good voice. How to do voice actor work?

1062
00:56:28,239 --> 00:56:30,120
Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't know how to do anything.

1063
00:56:32,200 --> 00:56:35,680
Speaker 1: That's the thing about advice. Advice is very specific. I

1064
00:56:35,800 --> 00:56:39,879
Speaker 1: only know how to do things that I can do,

1065
00:56:43,080 --> 00:56:45,400
Speaker 1: and I'm not good at locking in I'm really not

1066
00:56:46,600 --> 00:56:49,680
Speaker 1: uh this. All of what I've built as a Gecko

1067
00:56:49,800 --> 00:56:51,759
Speaker 1: has been as a result of like I yeah, I

1068
00:56:51,840 --> 00:56:55,759
Speaker 1: got a pandemic and it's it was a it was

1069
00:56:55,800 --> 00:57:02,520
Speaker 1: a kind of unique distraction free time. But I don't know.

1070
00:57:02,560 --> 00:57:05,200
Speaker 1: As you get older, life gets more there's less time

1071
00:57:06,040 --> 00:57:08,640
Speaker 1: to do stuff, especially if you have a kid. But

1072
00:57:08,920 --> 00:57:11,080
Speaker 1: I don't know. I think Antonio will find a stride.

1073
00:57:11,280 --> 00:57:14,840
Speaker 1: He's just he's he's got a good vibe to him,

1074
00:57:15,000 --> 00:57:18,320
Speaker 1: which is helpful. So I hope, I hope he becomes

1075
00:57:18,360 --> 00:57:22,360
Speaker 1: the next uh Tara Strong and he voices, he voices

1076
00:57:22,440 --> 00:57:26,320
Speaker 1: Timmy Turner. Hello, folks, it's Lyle here. That's the end

1077
00:57:26,400 --> 00:57:30,560
Speaker 1: of this episode. But get this, I'm releasing a bonus

1078
00:57:30,600 --> 00:57:35,200
Speaker 1: episode this week that's right at an entire extra hour

1079
00:57:35,560 --> 00:57:38,560
Speaker 1: of the podcast that you can listen to by becoming

1080
00:57:38,560 --> 00:57:43,120
Speaker 1: a Premium member of Therapy Gecko over at Therapy Gecko

1081
00:57:43,200 --> 00:57:48,360
Speaker 1: dot supercast dot com. Supercast subscribers get access to bonus episodes,

1082
00:57:48,560 --> 00:57:51,560
Speaker 1: they get a completely ad free podcast feed of the

1083
00:57:51,600 --> 00:57:55,440
Speaker 1: regular show, they get recordings from my live shows, members

1084
00:57:55,480 --> 00:57:58,800
Speaker 1: only streams, and they help support my ability to continue

1085
00:57:58,880 --> 00:58:02,520
Speaker 1: doing this podcast. So here's a clip from this week's

1086
00:58:02,840 --> 00:58:07,280
Speaker 1: members only bonus episode. The Spider Man movies have a

1087
00:58:07,640 --> 00:58:12,920
Speaker 1: very noble philosophy behind them. Flash Thompson, he's like an

1088
00:58:12,920 --> 00:58:15,800
Speaker 1: asshole to Peter Parker. The whole movie beats be punches

1089
00:58:15,840 --> 00:58:18,280
Speaker 1: him the face, beats him up for no reason. And

1090
00:58:18,320 --> 00:58:24,600
Speaker 1: then Peter Parker gets bit by the radioactive Spider and

1091
00:58:24,720 --> 00:58:28,520
Speaker 1: so he gets into a fight with Flash and like

1092
00:58:28,600 --> 00:58:34,160
Speaker 1: fucks with him. Fucking Uncle Ben comes into school and

1093
00:58:34,200 --> 00:58:39,360
Speaker 1: he's like, were you humiliating that poor kid? And Peter goes,

1094
00:58:40,000 --> 00:58:44,040
Speaker 1: I was, but he deserved it. What does Uncle Ben say?

1095
00:58:44,200 --> 00:58:45,919
Speaker 1: It says it doesn't matter if he deserves it. Peter,

1096
00:58:46,240 --> 00:58:49,720
Speaker 1: you gotta be the bigger man, because with great power

1097
00:58:51,240 --> 00:58:54,360
Speaker 1: comes great responsibility. I was watching this and I was like, damn,

1098
00:58:55,120 --> 00:59:00,720
Speaker 1: that's some noble ethics from the Spider Man movies. The

1099
00:59:00,800 --> 00:59:02,880
Speaker 1: world could use that. If you want to hear this

1100
00:59:02,920 --> 00:59:05,560
Speaker 1: full conversation, you can sign up to become a premium

1101
00:59:05,560 --> 00:59:10,480
Speaker 1: member at therapy Gecko dot supercast dot com, or find

1102
00:59:10,480 --> 00:59:14,520
Speaker 1: the link in the episode description that's therapy Gecko dot

1103
00:59:14,600 --> 00:59:19,000
Speaker 1: supercast dot com. All right, I have nothing else to say.

1104
00:59:20,240 --> 00:59:24,000
Speaker 3: Therapy An goes on the line taking your phone calls.

1105
00:59:23,800 --> 00:59:27,400
Speaker 1: Every nine, They can goes to what he's teaching you

1106
00:59:27,440 --> 00:59:28,880
Speaker 1: aloud in the memory of life.

1107
00:59:29,280 --> 00:59:33,280
Speaker 3: Money's not ready, an expert