WEBVTT - Zero Expectation Mode 0:00:00.360 --> 0:00:01.160 Hi Tribe. 0:00:01.760 --> 0:00:07.280 On this week's episode, we are discussing manifestation, masturbation. 0:00:07.240 --> 0:00:09.600 Side chicks and how many men have them. 0:00:09.720 --> 0:00:13.240 That applies the Rapper is fucking smart. 0:00:13.039 --> 0:00:17.040 Exploring hierarchy and ethical non monogamous relationships. 0:00:16.600 --> 0:00:19.959 In an anal alleyway. Hori, you don't want to miss 0:00:20.600 --> 0:00:45.280 enjoy Welcome back to Good Mom's Bad Choices. I'm Erica 0:00:45.880 --> 0:00:48.720 and I'm Mila, and it's Wednesday. 0:00:49.080 --> 0:00:50.080 How are you doing, dear? 0:00:50.320 --> 0:00:53.600 I'm good. I'm good. It's hot outside. 0:00:54.280 --> 0:00:58.880 My daughter is home from school because she's sick, and 0:00:58.960 --> 0:01:00.680 I was definitely going to try force her to go 0:01:00.720 --> 0:01:04.880 to school like the good bad mom I am, but 0:01:06.120 --> 0:01:09.840 she really couldn't breathe, so I had to just say. 0:01:09.680 --> 0:01:14.760 Fine, now she couldn't breathe. She's very stuffy. 0:01:15.240 --> 0:01:17.720 There's like a lot of fires happening right now in California, 0:01:18.000 --> 0:01:20.640 specifically in the valley, and so there's a lot of 0:01:20.680 --> 0:01:23.640 smoke in the air, and me and my daughter just 0:01:23.680 --> 0:01:27.160 have the worst allergies, so she's she's suffering a bit. 0:01:27.319 --> 0:01:30.480 So I'm good, though, how are you? 0:01:32.319 --> 0:01:36.920 I'm good. I found a lot of guilt this morning. 0:01:36.959 --> 0:01:39.000 I was trying to wake up Luna for school. She 0:01:39.200 --> 0:01:42.880 just would not wake up, like literally dead bodied, limp, 0:01:43.120 --> 0:01:46.399 like not responding. And I know it's our fault, like 0:01:46.480 --> 0:01:48.680 me and Erica do this. We've been doing this for 0:01:48.720 --> 0:01:50.840 three years. But I guess now that she's about to 0:01:50.840 --> 0:01:55.240 be in first grade, like the guilt is overwhelming because 0:01:55.360 --> 0:01:57.400 first of all, I get in trouble when she misses school. 0:01:57.480 --> 0:01:59.080 I get in trouble when she's late to school that 0:01:59.160 --> 0:02:00.680 I kind of send me to gail Well for sure. 0:02:01.200 --> 0:02:04.000 And so this morning, I was like, it's my fault, 0:02:04.000 --> 0:02:06.559 Like my child went to sleep at eleven thirty last 0:02:06.640 --> 0:02:09.280 night because I left Erica's at like ten, and she 0:02:09.360 --> 0:02:14.320 went to bed because her mother prioritizes podcasting over a 0:02:14.360 --> 0:02:16.720 school night. So I've been meaning to talk to you. 0:02:16.720 --> 0:02:18.480 We're gonna have to put an end to this because 0:02:18.520 --> 0:02:20.639 I'm not gonna go to jail over too many missed 0:02:20.639 --> 0:02:24.120 absences and tarties. And then I'm like coaching my daughter 0:02:24.200 --> 0:02:26.960 to lie. I'm like, tell them you had a dentist appointment. 0:02:27.040 --> 0:02:30.200 She's like, but I did it. I'm like just so warm. 0:02:31.639 --> 0:02:33.280 So I just I've been I had to coach my 0:02:34.120 --> 0:02:36.839 I had to coach myself this morning, like I let 0:02:36.840 --> 0:02:39.640 her sleep in because she wouldn't wake up, and I 0:02:39.720 --> 0:02:41.760 just lay there and I was like, it's okay, you're 0:02:41.880 --> 0:02:44.520 her mom. They can't tell you what to do. And 0:02:44.560 --> 0:02:47.079 then I was just like channeling Erica, like it's not 0:02:47.160 --> 0:02:49.320 I just made the decision that she wasn't gonna go. 0:02:49.440 --> 0:02:50.840 I'm like, she's just gonna be late. I'm just gonna 0:02:50.840 --> 0:02:52.360 lie about it, and it's fine. I'm gonna write a 0:02:52.360 --> 0:02:54.320 note and no one can tell me shit. Like I 0:02:54.320 --> 0:02:56.880 get so much anxiety about things that are not in 0:02:56.919 --> 0:02:59.760 my control, and I'm just like, are you alive? 0:03:00.080 --> 0:03:00.240 Yes? 0:03:00.320 --> 0:03:04.000 You are, so that's all that matters. So I'm just hey, 0:03:04.080 --> 0:03:06.919 we need to stop having late night ass fucking podcasting 0:03:06.960 --> 0:03:09.320 meetings that don't end till eleven on school nights and 0:03:09.360 --> 0:03:14.119 be if anyone else's experiencing guilt or anxiety from shit 0:03:14.200 --> 0:03:17.080 that's out of your control, this is your weekly sign 0:03:17.520 --> 0:03:18.440 to let that shit go. 0:03:19.720 --> 0:03:20.080 Amen. 0:03:20.440 --> 0:03:22.840 Amen, I agree. I mean my daughter went to went 0:03:22.880 --> 0:03:24.440 to bed late. I mean obviously you were here, so 0:03:24.480 --> 0:03:27.400 she went to bed promptly after you left. But yeah, 0:03:28.000 --> 0:03:31.440 you can't. Those days are done. Those days are done. 0:03:31.639 --> 0:03:34.040 Shall we pull a card, Yes we shall. 0:03:35.280 --> 0:03:37.800 Maybe the cards will tell us what's in our future 0:03:37.840 --> 0:03:40.800 as far as better structure for our children. 0:03:41.280 --> 0:03:44.560 Please God give us the answers. I'm really excited because 0:03:44.760 --> 0:03:47.920 one of our listeners, who is so fucking kind and 0:03:47.960 --> 0:03:50.920 probably so annoyed of us, hearing us a bit about 0:03:50.960 --> 0:03:53.200 our other deck that we don't like. We got a 0:03:53.240 --> 0:03:55.880 beautiful new deck in the mail, and it's called the 0:03:55.960 --> 0:04:00.680 Tarot of Bohemian Secrets, and it's called like it's all 0:04:00.720 --> 0:04:05.000 photography and it's all like black images. It's they photographed 0:04:05.040 --> 0:04:07.120 it in Haiti and they use like just things that 0:04:07.160 --> 0:04:10.040 they could find and like locals, and it's so beautiful 0:04:10.040 --> 0:04:13.320 and it gives such a good in depth understanding of 0:04:13.360 --> 0:04:16.200 each card and like the origin of Tiro. So I'm 0:04:16.200 --> 0:04:18.520 really excited to like really get into my witchiness with 0:04:18.600 --> 0:04:23.960 this new deck. Bet. The first card that we've picked 0:04:24.000 --> 0:04:28.680 in our new deck is Page of Swords, and this 0:04:28.720 --> 0:04:31.840 deck it's the Page of Machetes, but in the regular 0:04:31.880 --> 0:04:35.560 deck it's the Page of Swords. So the meaning of 0:04:35.680 --> 0:04:44.919 the Page of Swords or Machetes. The gifts are care, courage, severity, curiosity, communication, inspiration, 0:04:45.279 --> 0:04:51.880 and mental agility. The challenges are malevolence, cruelty, mental instability 0:04:51.920 --> 0:04:57.880 or intellectual immaturity, failure to recognize facts, aggression and destruction. 0:04:59.360 --> 0:05:01.839 You are very eager to execute an idea that you 0:05:01.880 --> 0:05:04.760 have been having. You've been you are very eager to 0:05:04.800 --> 0:05:06.800 execute an idea that you have been having or someone 0:05:06.839 --> 0:05:10.599 else shared with you. You're quite passionate about it, and you 0:05:10.640 --> 0:05:13.599 cannot wait to share the progress with others. It is 0:05:13.680 --> 0:05:16.920 time to be talkative, open up and talk about these 0:05:17.000 --> 0:05:20.960 ideas constructively. Maybe we're supposed to be revealing to the people. 0:05:21.040 --> 0:05:22.600 You know, we did just sign a big We are 0:05:22.680 --> 0:05:28.600 about to sign this very important contract this probably this week, 0:05:29.000 --> 0:05:31.960 and maybe this maybe the biggest contract of our of 0:05:32.000 --> 0:05:36.520 our professional podcasting for careers exactly. 0:05:37.480 --> 0:05:41.880 And so maybe it's just getting in anticipation with sharing 0:05:41.920 --> 0:05:45.880 with the tribe and the community about what we are 0:05:46.360 --> 0:05:48.560 have been working on and what we are going to 0:05:48.640 --> 0:05:52.279 be continuing to work on over the next few months 0:05:53.320 --> 0:05:55.800 and then releasing our baby to the world. 0:05:56.000 --> 0:05:58.039 This deck is really cool because it kind of talks 0:05:58.040 --> 0:06:01.880 about each card means and so you know, there's cups, 0:06:01.880 --> 0:06:07.200 those pet there's pinnacles, there's machetes, there's uh rooms. I 0:06:07.240 --> 0:06:09.320 think it's called something else in a different deck, but 0:06:09.480 --> 0:06:12.800 Basically it says that for swords or machetes, it's how 0:06:12.800 --> 0:06:16.359 does my how does my shadow side manifest itself in 0:06:16.440 --> 0:06:19.800 my mind? So this card reveals how the suppression controls 0:06:19.839 --> 0:06:22.839 your mind. Look at the challenges this card brings. So 0:06:22.920 --> 0:06:26.039 I guess it's it's dealing with your shadow side and 0:06:26.080 --> 0:06:28.400 the things that maybe you don't talk about, you don't reveal, 0:06:28.800 --> 0:06:33.760 and what you suppress and how that controls your mind. 0:06:34.839 --> 0:06:38.640 So cups are also like how your how your emotions manifest. 0:06:38.760 --> 0:06:41.760 Pinnacles are also how your shadow side manifests and material 0:06:41.880 --> 0:06:45.520 concerns like money. So we're about to be witches real 0:06:45.560 --> 0:06:46.480 soon with this new book. 0:06:46.600 --> 0:06:49.919 How are you other than Luna not going to sleep 0:06:50.640 --> 0:06:54.360 and or going to sleep too late, and uh all 0:06:54.360 --> 0:06:55.440 the other life steps. 0:06:57.240 --> 0:06:59.680 You know, I'm just taking it one day at a time, 0:07:00.080 --> 0:07:02.520 reminding myself there's just one step at a time. And 0:07:02.680 --> 0:07:08.480 also I'm really trying to prioritize my gratefulness and my gratitude. 0:07:08.560 --> 0:07:12.000 We are about to sign a very very very very 0:07:12.000 --> 0:07:16.800 big contract, and you know, like even with other shit 0:07:16.920 --> 0:07:19.760 going on in my life, I have to keep remembering, like, bitch, 0:07:20.160 --> 0:07:24.520 your dreams are coming true, like everything else can fall 0:07:24.520 --> 0:07:27.080 at the wayside, you know, not everything else obviously, like 0:07:27.120 --> 0:07:29.680 everything's in motion. But it's so easy to get caught 0:07:29.760 --> 0:07:31.760 up on the things that are like not that big 0:07:31.760 --> 0:07:33.320 of a deal, and I just don't want to die. 0:07:33.360 --> 0:07:35.679 One day and like my life flashed before my eyes 0:07:35.720 --> 0:07:38.440 and I'm like, damn, bitch, you was so stressed about 0:07:38.680 --> 0:07:42.160 the fucking shit that really didn't matter. Fuck Spectrum, you know. 0:07:43.320 --> 0:07:45.360 Like you're doing like like like they imagine needs to said, 0:07:45.360 --> 0:07:47.280 you might need to write Spectrum a cease and desist. 0:07:47.360 --> 0:07:52.560 Okay, no, I'm gonna pay them. I've just like stop 0:07:52.640 --> 0:07:56.200 calling me though, you know, it's just you know, keeping 0:07:56.200 --> 0:07:58.640 things in perspective. We get, I get. I get so 0:07:58.840 --> 0:08:02.080 caught up on just things that like eat away at me. 0:08:02.160 --> 0:08:05.800 I really get, like in my body, my stomach turns 0:08:05.800 --> 0:08:09.080 like butterflies when things are not perfect. But things are 0:08:09.080 --> 0:08:10.840 never going to be perfect, but also they kind of 0:08:10.880 --> 0:08:14.560 are perfect, like things are really we have manifested a 0:08:14.640 --> 0:08:17.760 shit ton of things that are actually happening, and we're 0:08:17.800 --> 0:08:19.320 about to go on a trip. We're about to go 0:08:19.400 --> 0:08:21.800 on multitude of trips this summer. As you know, we 0:08:21.880 --> 0:08:26.280 were some summer vacation taking bitches and this is our season. 0:08:26.360 --> 0:08:28.800 Last year, we weren't really able to thrive in their 0:08:28.920 --> 0:08:33.160 vacation state of mind like we wanted to. But just 0:08:33.360 --> 0:08:38.000 being grateful and prioritizing my gratefulness and my health and 0:08:38.559 --> 0:08:41.200 that I'm in a good position and whatever I don't like, 0:08:41.360 --> 0:08:44.400 I am free to work on every day, every second. 0:08:44.520 --> 0:08:46.000 Amen you are. 0:08:46.679 --> 0:08:48.439 What's going on with you? How are you? 0:08:48.960 --> 0:08:50.440 I'm good? I you know. 0:08:50.640 --> 0:08:54.040 I this weekend we got together with our friends and 0:08:54.200 --> 0:08:58.120 I really fucking needed that. Like I don't know, it's 0:08:58.120 --> 0:09:01.000 been a minute since I have sat down and had 0:09:01.120 --> 0:09:05.240 brunch and brunched with friends, and I just remember that 0:09:05.280 --> 0:09:08.360 bitches really do fucking love brunch. I fucking love brunch. 0:09:08.400 --> 0:09:11.640 I miss brunch like I've never needed brunch so bad. 0:09:12.280 --> 0:09:14.440 And you know, prior to this brunch, I had been 0:09:14.480 --> 0:09:15.599 feeling very overwhelmed. 0:09:15.640 --> 0:09:16.320 I've been stressed. 0:09:16.520 --> 0:09:18.959 Like me and Jamila have like a few, like different 0:09:19.000 --> 0:09:21.240 projects that we're working on outside of the podcast, and 0:09:22.080 --> 0:09:25.440 they're really stretching us and like asking a lot of 0:09:25.520 --> 0:09:27.640 us and like tapping into things that like we aren't 0:09:27.679 --> 0:09:31.960 necessarily experts up, but we've had to become like fast 0:09:32.040 --> 0:09:37.400 experts in and so I've been really kind of stressed 0:09:37.440 --> 0:09:42.040 about that, and I've just been stressed. Basically, when I 0:09:42.040 --> 0:09:44.480 get stressed, I'm like crazy, I'm just not like a 0:09:44.520 --> 0:09:46.680 really great person, and I don't mean to be. I 0:09:46.720 --> 0:09:49.520 am like short with people. I'm like I don't have patience. 0:09:50.000 --> 0:09:52.640 So I needed to I text my friends that I 0:09:52.679 --> 0:09:58.160 was like, hey, guys, please come fill my cup? Can 0:09:58.160 --> 0:10:00.160 we all fill each other's cups? Can we all just 0:10:00.160 --> 0:10:04.160 get together please and just like go eat and not 0:10:04.200 --> 0:10:06.480 talk about work, even though of course I ended up 0:10:06.480 --> 0:10:09.480 talking about work because I needed to actually solicit my 0:10:09.720 --> 0:10:14.439 tribe on some serious ideas that that me and Mila 0:10:14.480 --> 0:10:18.720 have going on and we needed their expert opinions. But 0:10:18.840 --> 0:10:21.000 I feel ever since that, ever since the weekend, I've 0:10:21.000 --> 0:10:22.920 been feeling so much better because I was not. 0:10:23.200 --> 0:10:25.000 I felt like I was not in a great place. 0:10:26.040 --> 0:10:29.840 But other than that, I've been feeling aside from work stresses, 0:10:30.240 --> 0:10:33.360 life has been pretty good. Like I you know, I'm 0:10:33.360 --> 0:10:36.079 still in my Dick Talks. It is now week three 0:10:36.600 --> 0:10:39.640 of the May Dick Talks. For those that have been 0:10:39.720 --> 0:10:44.400 joining me on the journey, was it. I just actually 0:10:45.200 --> 0:10:50.040 added Slack to our Patreon, so now the whole tribe 0:10:50.080 --> 0:10:52.720 can kind of talk and can talk amongst each other, 0:10:53.120 --> 0:10:56.560 which is really exciting. So if you guys are on Patreon, 0:10:56.600 --> 0:10:58.559 make sure you go check out the slack link that 0:10:58.600 --> 0:11:01.600 I posted so you guys can join the conversation. 0:11:02.080 --> 0:11:04.719 But I'm just really excited too because I I am. 0:11:04.720 --> 0:11:06.559 Not fucking and I feel good and like one of 0:11:06.559 --> 0:11:09.120 my niggas is like kind of like falling off the wayside, 0:11:09.160 --> 0:11:09.640 and I'm. 0:11:09.520 --> 0:11:10.319 Okay with that. 0:11:10.520 --> 0:11:13.280 I'm totally cool with that, like because I have no 0:11:14.200 --> 0:11:17.079 soul attachment to him. My pussy is not attached, like 0:11:17.520 --> 0:11:19.360 and the thing is like I knew if we had 0:11:19.400 --> 0:11:21.760 sex like it was gonna be bomb. Like I know 0:11:22.559 --> 0:11:26.360 the dick is good, I know the connection is there 0:11:26.760 --> 0:11:29.640 for sure, but there's a lot of other things that 0:11:29.679 --> 0:11:31.800 are not aligned. And I'm so glad that I didn't 0:11:31.840 --> 0:11:35.520 cross that line because a bitch would be fucking confused 0:11:35.559 --> 0:11:38.040 right now wasting my time thinking about this nigga when 0:11:38.040 --> 0:11:40.160 I have like four hundred thousand other things I have 0:11:40.200 --> 0:11:43.280 to think about. So I feel grateful that, like I 0:11:43.320 --> 0:11:46.400 don't I that I'm that I've continued on this journey. 0:11:47.240 --> 0:11:50.400 And I'm also grateful that our girl Samaya is going 0:11:50.480 --> 0:11:52.640 to be joining us this weekend. If you guys don't 0:11:52.640 --> 0:11:54.960 know who Sexual Essential is, you guys definitely have to 0:11:55.040 --> 0:11:57.920 check her out. She is a hands on sex educator. 0:11:57.960 --> 0:12:00.440 She's just a shit like I think I've I know, 0:12:00.480 --> 0:12:02.040 I've talked about her. I talked about her all the time. 0:12:02.080 --> 0:12:06.200 She does courses, these amazing virtual zoom classes where women 0:12:06.240 --> 0:12:08.800 are learning how to masturbate, learning how to suck dick, 0:12:09.000 --> 0:12:12.240 learning how to ride dick, and like really learning. 0:12:12.960 --> 0:12:14.720 That's all I have to say this, just really learning. 0:12:14.760 --> 0:12:15.839 That's all I'm going to say about that. 0:12:18.120 --> 0:12:20.040 She has a gift to the world. Like her, she's 0:12:20.080 --> 0:12:24.240 fulfilling her purpose and like sending everyone knowledge, like all 0:12:24.640 --> 0:12:27.240 the sex knowledge that they need. I can't be happier 0:12:27.280 --> 0:12:28.480 about the work that she's done. 0:12:28.800 --> 0:12:33.599 Patrons who are joining on the Dick Talks a masturbation 0:12:33.760 --> 0:12:36.120 manifestation course, which I guess is a course that she 0:12:36.160 --> 0:12:38.400 had originally taught on her Patreon for a while, but 0:12:38.440 --> 0:12:41.200 then she retired that course and now she's bringing it 0:12:41.200 --> 0:12:46.080 back specifically especially for us. And manifestation and masturbation is 0:12:46.080 --> 0:12:49.280 such a powerful tool and something that I've used over 0:12:49.280 --> 0:12:52.880 the last year and I've seen results. I actually used 0:12:52.880 --> 0:12:55.160 it the other day and I hadn't done it, probably 0:12:55.480 --> 0:12:57.120 I hadn't done it for like a few months, but 0:12:57.160 --> 0:12:58.959 I was like, you know, let me just stop being 0:12:59.000 --> 0:13:01.040 so horny and thinking about it niggas and bitches all 0:13:01.040 --> 0:13:03.400 the time, and think about my goals real quick while 0:13:03.480 --> 0:13:06.640 I uh, while I get there and the tool is 0:13:06.679 --> 0:13:09.800 just so powerful. It also just feels it's a different 0:13:09.840 --> 0:13:12.319 type of release when you come. I don't know, I 0:13:12.360 --> 0:13:14.240 don't really know how to describe it, like I really 0:13:17.880 --> 0:13:20.280 it's it's a little bit of that, but it's more 0:13:20.320 --> 0:13:24.040 so like when I come and I'm like thinking about sex, 0:13:23.720 --> 0:13:26.559 I'm like exhausted after like I'm tired. I'm like, that's 0:13:26.559 --> 0:13:29.000 how I put myself to bed, you know. But when 0:13:29.000 --> 0:13:31.760 I do that and I think about like my goals 0:13:31.840 --> 0:13:36.960 or something specific that I'm manifesting, I feel like awake afterwards, 0:13:37.080 --> 0:13:41.760 like I feel activated and like motivated, which is why 0:13:41.840 --> 0:13:44.360 usually I try to do them that like midday, not 0:13:44.440 --> 0:13:46.000 at night because the bit you need to go to bed. 0:13:46.040 --> 0:13:49.960 But yeah, I'm just really excited for Samia to come 0:13:50.040 --> 0:13:52.560 and teach teach the tribe on on Thursday. 0:13:52.679 --> 0:13:53.319 All about that. 0:13:53.440 --> 0:13:56.240 So if you guys are interested, just click the link 0:13:56.240 --> 0:13:58.640 in our bio and join the Dick Talks Challenge. You 0:13:58.640 --> 0:14:00.600 don't actually have to dig talks be a part of 0:14:00.640 --> 0:14:03.840 this Dick Tooks either. We're having so many amazing conversations 0:14:03.840 --> 0:14:05.880 with women that I don't I don't even know if 0:14:05.920 --> 0:14:08.120 all of them are abstaining from sex, but it's just 0:14:08.280 --> 0:14:12.600 it's just a necessary conversation conversations that we're having every 0:14:12.600 --> 0:14:15.360 Thursday night on Zoom, and I kind. 0:14:15.200 --> 0:14:17.840 Of like want to keep it going forever, like I really. 0:14:24.840 --> 0:14:27.160 I know, I feel like I need it. I really do. 0:14:26.920 --> 0:14:30.840 I you know, I can't lie. I haven't been abstaining 0:14:30.840 --> 0:14:34.720 from sex, but because I've been going to the meetings, 0:14:35.200 --> 0:14:38.880 this so much feels like because I've because I've been 0:14:38.880 --> 0:14:41.440 going to the meetings, it's highlighted so much of like 0:14:42.040 --> 0:14:45.600 how much good sex can confuse you and cloud you, 0:14:45.760 --> 0:14:48.920 and like it really does infiltrate your feelings. And then 0:14:48.920 --> 0:14:54.400 we even discussed about how women release more serotonin during 0:14:54.720 --> 0:14:56.800 sex than men do, and it just like it does 0:14:56.840 --> 0:14:59.480 a tribute to like how we you know, men always 0:14:59.480 --> 0:15:03.600 say women are getting clingy or we get emotionally tied 0:15:03.720 --> 0:15:06.720 to men after we have sex. It's true, you know, 0:15:06.880 --> 0:15:09.280 like I can just being able to talk to my 0:15:09.400 --> 0:15:11.600 tribe and hear what they're going through and hear their 0:15:11.640 --> 0:15:16.440 experiences while I'm like literally doing getting dumber by the 0:15:16.480 --> 0:15:23.960 second each fuck I can. Definitely, it's definitely empowered me 0:15:24.040 --> 0:15:27.760 because Lord knows, I'm a slow loaner, a slow learner, 0:15:28.000 --> 0:15:31.240 and I'd love connecting with our tribe. And it's such 0:15:31.400 --> 0:15:34.160 proof that. Like obviously we podcast every week and we 0:15:34.200 --> 0:15:36.400 put our business on the internet, but it's so nice 0:15:36.440 --> 0:15:38.440 to be able to hear from everybody else, you know, 0:15:38.560 --> 0:15:40.840 like it's a two way conversation or like a four 0:15:40.920 --> 0:15:44.560 hundred way conversation really, And I'm just like I feel 0:15:44.600 --> 0:15:47.480 so every I feel like every time I'm like taking notes. 0:15:47.600 --> 0:15:50.920 It's like Bible study. You know, you go to church 0:15:50.960 --> 0:15:52.840 on Sunday, but during the week you need the Bible 0:15:52.880 --> 0:15:55.120 study to keep you going. You know, like you get 0:15:55.120 --> 0:15:57.400 the episode on Wednesday, but you need the Bible study 0:15:57.400 --> 0:15:59.640 on Wednesday to really dig in, so you really talk 0:15:59.680 --> 0:16:03.920 about the scriptures. So I'm super I am. I'm like 0:16:04.160 --> 0:16:04.560 I want it. 0:16:04.600 --> 0:16:07.720 I don't want it to end to you guys, you know, 0:16:08.000 --> 0:16:10.240 like I know sometimes you guys are We've like I 0:16:10.280 --> 0:16:12.440 always to hear people say, like when they're listening to us, 0:16:12.440 --> 0:16:14.200 like it feels like, you know, like they're talking to 0:16:14.200 --> 0:16:16.400 their girlfriends and stuff, but like we can't hear you. 0:16:17.040 --> 0:16:20.920 So it's nice to like hear you. Like, So, I 0:16:20.960 --> 0:16:23.560 don't know, I'm just I'm I'm just I love that 0:16:23.600 --> 0:16:26.440 we are able to talk to people in in in 0:16:26.480 --> 0:16:30.440 the person, in the person, in the virtue, in the 0:16:30.520 --> 0:16:33.760 virtual human and see faces and like mouths move and like, 0:16:34.840 --> 0:16:38.920 you know, put a face to a name an Instagram handle, 0:16:39.160 --> 0:16:40.440 you know, it's it's. 0:16:40.160 --> 0:16:43.920 It's kind of cool. So anyway, other than that, I'm 0:16:43.960 --> 0:16:44.680 I'm pretty good. 0:16:45.320 --> 0:16:50.520 Me and uh my, my other lover that I went 0:16:50.520 --> 0:16:52.520 on my secret vacation with. 0:16:56.160 --> 0:16:58.520 Well, can you like name? We haven't named our base 0:16:58.600 --> 0:17:01.080 and we haven't named our bays in a long time. 0:17:01.160 --> 0:17:02.800 We've been like, I feel like ever since we got 0:17:02.800 --> 0:17:07.159 those boyfriends, we know, we feel like we've totally we 0:17:07.440 --> 0:17:10.080 haven't come back to our bays, but we've been single 0:17:10.160 --> 0:17:13.520 for some time now. We obviously denounced the boyfriend thing 0:17:13.520 --> 0:17:15.240 that didn't work for us, So like, are you gonna 0:17:15.240 --> 0:17:17.320 give your bay's name? I really need you to give 0:17:17.359 --> 0:17:19.359 I really need you to give more detail you're like 0:17:19.400 --> 0:17:22.119 living a dream right now somewhat and you're just really, 0:17:24.240 --> 0:17:28.199 what am I gonna call him? 0:17:28.359 --> 0:17:28.680 I don't know. 0:17:28.720 --> 0:17:29.920 I don't want to give the other one a bay. 0:17:30.000 --> 0:17:33.000 He's not a bae. He doesn't he doesn't qualify as he's. 0:17:32.920 --> 0:17:35.919 Not keep talking about you, I think mm. 0:17:36.119 --> 0:17:42.960 And I'm gonna call him fine as fine now, So okay, okay, 0:17:42.960 --> 0:17:48.399 so fine asbe He's amazing, like we okay, there's just 0:17:48.480 --> 0:17:51.600 like he's fine. He is fine friend, you know, like 0:17:51.840 --> 0:17:56.760 because of practice, because I've a lot of expectation and relationships. 0:17:57.080 --> 0:18:00.520 It's it's taken time, you know, Like it's started off 0:18:00.520 --> 0:18:04.080 with happy Bay and then like it went on like 0:18:04.119 --> 0:18:05.640 and then after Happy Bay, and. 0:18:06.000 --> 0:18:07.760 What are other bays I had? I can't even remember 0:18:07.760 --> 0:18:07.960 all the. 0:18:07.960 --> 0:18:14.200 Bays Happy Bay, Happy Bay, Trembling lip started off with 0:18:14.240 --> 0:18:18.359 Trembling lip Bay. It started with trembling lipe Hat Babay. Okay, 0:18:18.359 --> 0:18:21.879 that was that was broke Broke Bay. Broke Bay was 0:18:21.920 --> 0:18:24.600 like episode one or two. There was a car Bay. 0:18:24.680 --> 0:18:27.159 He was the first bae the Dirty Carpet. Yeah, he 0:18:27.160 --> 0:18:29.920 didn't start with he started with Trembling Lip Bay. Who 0:18:30.040 --> 0:18:32.120 was the guy that I went to Abisa with and 0:18:32.160 --> 0:18:35.400 that lives here, and like we were just being practicing 0:18:35.440 --> 0:18:38.400 being like radically honest with one another about like what 0:18:38.440 --> 0:18:40.840 we were doing, like who we were dating. And then 0:18:40.840 --> 0:18:42.520 he ended up leaving me for like a white girl, 0:18:42.560 --> 0:18:44.320 and I was pissed and I was really hurt because 0:18:44.320 --> 0:18:46.600 I couldn't believe that this African man was leaving me 0:18:46.680 --> 0:18:47.760 for a blonde white woman. 0:18:47.960 --> 0:18:48.920 Pissed it. 0:18:49.400 --> 0:18:52.879 We're still friends now, and yeah, he's he's not with 0:18:52.880 --> 0:18:54.840 that white woman anymore. He's with another white woman. But 0:18:54.960 --> 0:18:56.560 you know, I had to accept, like he's just that's 0:18:56.560 --> 0:18:58.760 his thing. That's on brand for him, very own brand 0:18:58.800 --> 0:19:01.439 for him. And and then Happy Bay came along and 0:19:01.600 --> 0:19:03.159 was like, I love you, but I don't want to, 0:19:03.240 --> 0:19:05.760 like I can't be in a monogamous relationship. 0:19:06.040 --> 0:19:08.520 And so you know, I got to practice that. 0:19:08.600 --> 0:19:10.159 I got to feel a lot of things because I 0:19:10.160 --> 0:19:12.679 fell deeply in love with him and like got my 0:19:12.720 --> 0:19:15.359 feelings hurt, but also couldn't really be hurt because he 0:19:15.520 --> 0:19:18.600 told me what his boundaries were up front and then 0:19:19.040 --> 0:19:22.400 proceeded to be probably a hoe for the summertime, and 0:19:22.640 --> 0:19:26.159 you know, exert my I'm I'm non monogamous, wave my 0:19:26.200 --> 0:19:28.480 nominogamous flag and I can do whatever the fuck I 0:19:28.480 --> 0:19:29.320 want to do flag. 0:19:30.200 --> 0:19:32.119 And then Short Bay came along. 0:19:32.160 --> 0:19:33.840 I don't think I ever talked about Short Bay, and 0:19:33.920 --> 0:19:37.000 actually Short Bay popped Short Bay. Someone called me about 0:19:37.000 --> 0:19:41.680 Short Bay today. Someone called me at fucking nine am 0:19:41.720 --> 0:19:44.960 with some tea on Short Bay. Okay, I was like, nigga, 0:19:44.960 --> 0:19:45.520 I ain't got. 0:19:45.400 --> 0:19:47.960 Time, what do you mean? So encolgi about her that 0:19:48.280 --> 0:19:50.920 short Bay is in my friends DMS, and. 0:19:52.320 --> 0:19:53.919 You get you. 0:19:55.640 --> 0:19:57.800 Know, she knows that he knows that we know each other. 0:19:57.840 --> 0:20:00.160 And I said, that's because me and short Pay are 0:20:00.160 --> 0:20:02.840 not like, that's not the relationship we had. There's no tea. 0:20:03.080 --> 0:20:06.040 It's fine, go ahead, do your thing. And that's too 0:20:06.160 --> 0:20:08.280 that like for me, like I used to be like 0:20:08.400 --> 0:20:10.960 possessive and jealous, you know, and for like having that 0:20:10.960 --> 0:20:13.160 conversation at nine am about a nigga that I'm you know. 0:20:13.080 --> 0:20:18.159 We're cool, but I'm not take go do what you do. 0:20:18.520 --> 0:20:20.879 Be free my love both of you, you know. 0:20:21.680 --> 0:20:25.480 And so now that I'm here with fine aspe who 0:20:25.600 --> 0:20:31.320 is very who's non monogamous as well, and but like 0:20:31.600 --> 0:20:34.960 nonminogamy is not what and for me and him is 0:20:35.000 --> 0:20:37.119 the same It's not like I want to be fucking everyone. 0:20:37.280 --> 0:20:41.000 It's just like I just set this expectation here because 0:20:41.800 --> 0:20:44.120 at least if we start here, then like no one's 0:20:44.160 --> 0:20:46.200 gonna get hurt. It doesn't mean that I want to 0:20:46.240 --> 0:20:49.320 be fucking everyone. I very very well may only be 0:20:49.400 --> 0:20:54.400 sleeping with you for a long period of time, for years, 0:20:54.520 --> 0:20:58.280 maybe forever. But if we have this understanding and this 0:20:58.359 --> 0:21:04.639 conversation is ongoing conversation, then it really eliminates the possibility 0:21:04.800 --> 0:21:08.840 of people getting hurt and having these stupid ass expectations 0:21:08.880 --> 0:21:11.520 of like this pussy is only for you and this 0:21:11.600 --> 0:21:13.720 dick is only for me, and so I don't have 0:21:13.760 --> 0:21:16.959 that expectation with fine Espe and it's going great, Like 0:21:17.240 --> 0:21:20.679