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Let me say, first 0:02:26.520 --> 0:02:28.480 of all, I heard you say I don't want to, 0:02:29.040 --> 0:02:32.160 but I want to offer you that instead of affirming 0:02:32.560 --> 0:02:36.240 because you're damning, you're you're important, You've got power, instead 0:02:36.280 --> 0:02:39.519 of affirming what you don't want, just make another choice. 0:02:39.520 --> 0:02:44.120 So I'm choosing to. I'm no longer choosing to be reactive. 0:02:44.440 --> 0:02:52.200 I'm choosing this because choices your power. What's up, everybody, 0:02:52.280 --> 0:02:56.200 I'm Gammy and this is positively gam Every week I 0:02:56.280 --> 0:03:00.600 have raw, in depth conversation with inspirational people pushing for 0:03:00.760 --> 0:03:06.920 change on everything from aging, relationships, politics, wellness, to the 0:03:06.960 --> 0:03:10.760 current issues facing the black community. In this episode, we're 0:03:10.800 --> 0:03:13.360 going to be discussing how to cope as a society 0:03:13.480 --> 0:03:18.320 saturated with trauma. Joining us today is yan La van 0:03:18.440 --> 0:03:22.359 zand iyan La is one of the most celebrated writers 0:03:22.360 --> 0:03:26.320 and speakers, and she's among the most influential and acclaimed 0:03:26.360 --> 0:03:32.760 spiritual life coaches. Iyanla embodies a no nonsense approaching her message. Currently, 0:03:32.880 --> 0:03:36.360 Illanla is the host and executive producer of the award 0:03:36.400 --> 0:03:40.760 winning breakout hit iyan La Fixed My Life, the number 0:03:40.800 --> 0:03:45.080 one reality show on OWN. Thank you so much, Illanna 0:03:45.160 --> 0:03:48.360 for joining us. I feel so blessed today and I 0:03:48.440 --> 0:03:51.720 actually am feeling the need to talk to you today. 0:03:51.880 --> 0:03:55.640 Congrats on your new podcast, Everything's Podcast Now. So good 0:03:55.640 --> 0:03:58.720 for you, I know, thank you so much, thank you 0:03:58.760 --> 0:04:01.960 so much. I'm enjoying it. But how has it been 0:04:02.000 --> 0:04:05.600 for you fixing other people's lives? You know, I don't. 0:04:05.960 --> 0:04:09.640 Everybody says that I don't. I don't really fix their lives. 0:04:09.680 --> 0:04:12.160 I give them the information that they need to fix 0:04:12.160 --> 0:04:14.880 their own life. You know. People come with their story 0:04:15.000 --> 0:04:18.440 and with their beliefs and with their everything, and you know, 0:04:18.560 --> 0:04:21.520 I go in to interrupt the patterns that they have 0:04:22.240 --> 0:04:25.559 and provide them with a different perspective on not only 0:04:25.600 --> 0:04:28.120 what the problem is, but what they need to do 0:04:28.360 --> 0:04:30.360 or not to get to where they want to be. 0:04:30.520 --> 0:04:34.760 So it's been quite a journey eight you. It has been. 0:04:34.839 --> 0:04:38.320 And I'm a huge fan. I'm I watched you know 0:04:38.400 --> 0:04:41.920 all the time, and I must say that you really 0:04:42.080 --> 0:04:47.640 find some really creative ways to get people to really 0:04:47.800 --> 0:04:50.960 look at themselves and to look honestly at what's going 0:04:51.000 --> 0:04:54.560 on because and and that's hard work. Well that's hard 0:04:54.560 --> 0:04:57.279 work because most times we're in such denial we don't 0:04:57.279 --> 0:05:00.479 want to see ourselves, you know, and particularly for people 0:05:00.520 --> 0:05:04.000 of color, we don't want to move into anything with 0:05:04.000 --> 0:05:09.040 the consciousness that there's something wrong with me. So when 0:05:09.040 --> 0:05:12.600 we when you start telling people that there's another way, 0:05:12.720 --> 0:05:16.120 what they hear is you did it wrong. And for 0:05:16.560 --> 0:05:19.960 people who have been oppressed or denied or help back 0:05:20.040 --> 0:05:22.960 for so long, that's a hard thing, but it is 0:05:23.000 --> 0:05:28.320 also a common human challenge that just reflection, self reflection. 0:05:28.920 --> 0:05:31.640 It's hard, you know, But I think my team. I 0:05:31.680 --> 0:05:34.359 have an incredible team of producers that support me and 0:05:34.440 --> 0:05:37.240 coming up with what we call our launch pad and 0:05:37.279 --> 0:05:40.440 our exercises, and then I just go in and do 0:05:40.480 --> 0:05:43.760 the work. That's the easy part. Oh, that's the easy part. No, 0:05:43.839 --> 0:05:56.600 that's the hard part. Actually, I was thinking earlier and 0:05:56.640 --> 0:06:00.400 I had this conversation with Will and with Jada constantly 0:06:01.520 --> 0:06:05.640 about compassion, and I was like, why am I charged 0:06:05.800 --> 0:06:10.279 this year and all within all with everything that's going 0:06:10.360 --> 0:06:13.080 on with trying to live my life from a more 0:06:13.120 --> 0:06:17.960 compassionate space, and it's just been so very challenging for me. 0:06:18.080 --> 0:06:22.160 It's just been really difficult and during this everything, with 0:06:22.279 --> 0:06:25.360 everything that's going on, and this year has been so 0:06:25.480 --> 0:06:29.039 traumatic for so many reasons. We have the pandemic, we 0:06:29.160 --> 0:06:32.960 have the Black Lives Matter, protests, we have all the 0:06:33.080 --> 0:06:36.400 police brutality that actually has been going on for years 0:06:36.440 --> 0:06:40.560 and years now, we have the writers and the storming 0:06:40.600 --> 0:06:44.880 of the capitol, Like, how do let's start with, how 0:06:44.920 --> 0:06:48.920 do you personally deal with the state of affairs in 0:06:48.920 --> 0:06:52.120 this country and not lose your mind because I'm I 0:06:52.440 --> 0:06:58.880 get so full of anger and frustration. God is so 0:06:59.040 --> 0:07:02.000 for me. God is, God is in charge, God knows, 0:07:02.360 --> 0:07:05.640 God is moving, God is shifting, God is changing. And 0:07:05.720 --> 0:07:09.520 so I don't have a story about anything that's going 0:07:09.600 --> 0:07:13.480 on because I know that everything is exactly as it 0:07:13.520 --> 0:07:18.760 needs to be in order for what is required to unfold. 0:07:19.280 --> 0:07:21.800 So I I you know, I haven't had no trauma, 0:07:22.200 --> 0:07:25.160 I haven't had no upset. You know, every now and 0:07:25.200 --> 0:07:28.760 then the thing that makes me crazier than anything else 0:07:28.800 --> 0:07:31.040 is they repeat the same thing over and over. Give 0:07:31.120 --> 0:07:33.520 me some new information. So you know, I just don't 0:07:33.520 --> 0:07:37.360 watch it. But I think that everything And you know, 0:07:37.520 --> 0:07:42.000 I look at this, We're looking out and I'm looking 0:07:42.080 --> 0:07:46.960 in and I'm saying, okay, I do that. How do 0:07:47.040 --> 0:07:52.120 I lie, change my story, bullying myself, deny? How do 0:07:52.240 --> 0:07:54.640 I do that? And once I get it clear in me, 0:07:54.840 --> 0:07:56.960 when I see it out there. I know what it is. 0:07:57.200 --> 0:08:00.240 It doesn't bother me. We are looking at ourselves else 0:08:00.400 --> 0:08:03.560 But because as we said earlier, it's so hard for 0:08:03.600 --> 0:08:06.680 people to reflect and self reflect, we're making it about 0:08:06.720 --> 0:08:09.920 what's going on out there? What are you doing in here? 0:08:10.640 --> 0:08:14.360 Turn the spotlight in instead of making it a spotlight 0:08:14.400 --> 0:08:19.000 that goes out. Everything that we're seeing is what we 0:08:19.400 --> 0:08:24.200 as human race do. This is the truth being revealed. 0:08:24.280 --> 0:08:29.640 Oh I'm so excited. I'm excited personally. I know that's 0:08:29.640 --> 0:08:33.360 a little strange, but it's very no not I understand, 0:08:33.520 --> 0:08:37.080 I understand what you're saying. It's just you know, in 0:08:37.160 --> 0:08:40.800 the moment, it's just it's just typically difficult for me 0:08:40.960 --> 0:08:44.480 to go into that space. If the minute you think 0:08:44.520 --> 0:08:49.320 it's happening out there, it's happened, you'll get upset about 0:08:50.520 --> 0:08:52.960 the minute you think, oh, look what they're doing, Look 0:08:53.000 --> 0:08:56.400 what they're saying, as opposed to how do I do that? 0:08:57.400 --> 0:09:00.240 Have I done that? Okay? And then when I get 0:09:00.280 --> 0:09:03.000 it in here, when I see it out there, I said, oh, 0:09:03.040 --> 0:09:06.240 I know what that is. I know what that is. Okay, 0:09:06.240 --> 0:09:08.720 I know what you're doing. I don't need the news 0:09:08.920 --> 0:09:11.160 or anybody to tell me the truth because I know 0:09:11.240 --> 0:09:13.679 the truth in me, so when I see it out there, 0:09:13.720 --> 0:09:18.800 I just say, thank God, I'm better now. I'm better now, 0:09:19.480 --> 0:09:22.560 you know. So, Yeah, compassion is the thing. I have 0:09:22.720 --> 0:09:28.120 compassion for us right now because we've prolonged and denied 0:09:28.360 --> 0:09:31.839 and we assisted for so long to the universe has 0:09:31.880 --> 0:09:35.400 now just dumped it all in our lap at one time. 0:09:35.840 --> 0:09:39.439 But that's because we didn't take the clues along the way. 0:09:39.960 --> 0:09:44.960 We know that racism exists. We know that white superiority 0:09:45.000 --> 0:09:48.920 is the foundation upon which this this country was built. 0:09:49.200 --> 0:09:52.760 We know that people have in order to maintain their 0:09:52.800 --> 0:09:56.920 position or deny other We know it, and then we've accommodated, 0:09:57.000 --> 0:10:00.640 we've tolerated it, We've gone along with it, and universe, 0:10:00.760 --> 0:10:05.160 you know, God is saying enough until we surrender, and 0:10:05.240 --> 0:10:09.040 surrender is coming. We're not. Yes, yes, that is a 0:10:09.080 --> 0:10:13.400 good word. I'm familiar with that word as a recovering addict. 0:10:13.400 --> 0:10:19.320 I'm familiar with that word surrender. So it's surrendering to 0:10:19.320 --> 0:10:23.920 to what is happening so that change can occur. Is 0:10:23.960 --> 0:10:26.880 that a good way of absolutely looking at it? And 0:10:26.920 --> 0:10:30.360 you know what else gave me? All change is preceded 0:10:30.400 --> 0:10:33.240 by chaos. Think about when you want to clean your 0:10:33.280 --> 0:10:36.480 closet out. In order to do the closet, you gotta 0:10:36.559 --> 0:10:39.960 take everything out, and the bed, the floor, the shoot, 0:10:40.040 --> 0:10:41.959 you find the two things that you bought at you 0:10:42.080 --> 0:10:46.160 never wore. Everything is all over. So it's chaos and 0:10:46.200 --> 0:10:49.360 you have to sort through the chaos in order to 0:10:49.600 --> 0:10:52.960 recreate order. And that's what's going on. Like that is 0:10:53.000 --> 0:10:56.120 such a good way to put it. Let me ask you, though, 0:10:56.240 --> 0:10:59.840 what are some techniques that we can use in order 0:10:59.880 --> 0:11:04.760 to to confront you know these? For me, it's still 0:11:04.800 --> 0:11:07.880 I still call it trauma, so that we're not keeping 0:11:07.920 --> 0:11:13.880 it all bottled up inside or have this emotional outbreaks. 0:11:13.920 --> 0:11:16.040 And I'm going to use my husband and I as 0:11:16.080 --> 0:11:22.480 an example. We have a very different way of looking 0:11:22.640 --> 0:11:28.200 at the pandemic and how we are managing it and 0:11:28.640 --> 0:11:34.920 right now and it is it continues to be an 0:11:35.000 --> 0:11:41.240 area of contention for us. So for me, I've surrendered 0:11:41.280 --> 0:11:47.560 to and respect how he feels about the pandemic and 0:11:47.600 --> 0:11:51.240 how he wants to move about. And I asked him 0:11:51.280 --> 0:11:55.480 to do the same for me. And this morning the 0:11:55.600 --> 0:11:59.640 conversation just went left, like my, my, I don't even 0:11:59.679 --> 0:12:03.640 really want to talk about it, you know what? I mean, yeah, 0:12:03.640 --> 0:12:07.520 about the pandemic. I don't feel the need to converse 0:12:07.559 --> 0:12:09.800 about it, like how many people are dying? Like the 0:12:09.920 --> 0:12:13.520 numbers are really high here in California right now, and 0:12:13.600 --> 0:12:16.120 I don't feel the need to discuss that because I 0:12:16.200 --> 0:12:24.280 know that compared to even him, we as a family 0:12:24.360 --> 0:12:27.880 out here are so in tune to it because we 0:12:28.000 --> 0:12:33.360 have to get tested constantly because we're all working and 0:12:33.400 --> 0:12:37.520 so we're constantly being tested. Like I'm on a first 0:12:37.640 --> 0:12:41.520 name basis with the E. M. T That comes to 0:12:41.600 --> 0:12:45.120 do our testing. I see him like two and three 0:12:45.160 --> 0:12:52.560 times a week. We're friends, you know. But yeah, So 0:12:53.280 --> 0:12:56.200 I don't know, how do you have conversation with people 0:12:57.120 --> 0:12:59.760 and not just get all out of whack when you're 0:12:59.760 --> 0:13:02.520 talking talking about any of this. I find myself to 0:13:02.600 --> 0:13:07.400 be on social media constantly. I'm on Facebook when things 0:13:07.480 --> 0:13:09.440 like when the riots are I got something to say 0:13:09.480 --> 0:13:14.080 about everything, and I'm on Facebook, and then after I'm done, 0:13:14.760 --> 0:13:18.120 I'm like, girl, then do you feel better now that 0:13:18.240 --> 0:13:21.240 you because I'm I'm going on there thinking that I'm 0:13:21.320 --> 0:13:26.079 releasing my frustration, But I don't feel that way after 0:13:26.200 --> 0:13:30.199 it's all said and done, I really actually feel even 0:13:30.240 --> 0:13:34.840 more amped up. So then I'm like, maybe I just 0:13:34.960 --> 0:13:38.839 need to not be on social media, maybe I don't 0:13:38.840 --> 0:13:42.000 need to be watching the news, But then I feel uninformed. 0:13:43.920 --> 0:13:51.079 It is traumatic because it's such a abrupt and radical 0:13:51.320 --> 0:13:58.160 change to our habitual problem solving techniques. None of our 0:13:58.280 --> 0:14:03.920 problems solving techniques ROLLA don't respect none of them. Okay. 0:14:04.600 --> 0:14:09.600 So it is quite traumatic because one of the number 0:14:09.640 --> 0:14:15.160 one addictions of human beings, all human beings, is controlling, 0:14:16.800 --> 0:14:23.520 and we have totally lost control. So to be informed 0:14:23.680 --> 0:14:27.520 is one thing, but to want to know what to 0:14:27.640 --> 0:14:32.440 do then stirs up something else in us as human beings, 0:14:32.880 --> 0:14:36.480 which is survival. So I gotta know what to do 0:14:36.520 --> 0:14:40.720 to survive because I can't control this thing. So we 0:14:40.840 --> 0:14:42.640 go here to get some info, and there to get 0:14:42.680 --> 0:14:44.880 some info, and there, and we're listening and this one 0:14:45.040 --> 0:14:47.760 and then somebody says something, and no, that's crazy. And 0:14:48.080 --> 0:14:53.400 you know, so as opposed to trying to make it again, 0:14:53.600 --> 0:14:57.600 trying to make it outkay out there, you gotta get 0:14:57.640 --> 0:15:01.360 okay in here. When this thing first hit, I said 0:15:01.400 --> 0:15:03.120 that ain't got nothing to do with me. I'm not 0:15:03.200 --> 0:15:05.960 having it. I'm not entertaining it, I'm not engaging it. 0:15:06.040 --> 0:15:08.200 But I got to do. Okay, I didn't not know 0:15:08.280 --> 0:15:13.160 toilet paper, and if the toilet paper was pure, I 0:15:13.240 --> 0:15:15.320 was in a lot of trouble because I had no 0:15:15.480 --> 0:15:23.040 toilet paper, you know, so, but I have to do 0:15:23.120 --> 0:15:27.040 so Number one, I was just real clear that, Okay, 0:15:27.200 --> 0:15:31.720 this has to be a lesson and universal lesson that 0:15:31.840 --> 0:15:35.680 we're all learning. What is my lesson? For me, the 0:15:35.800 --> 0:15:40.120 lesson was for the past I don't know, fifteen sixteen years. 0:15:40.640 --> 0:15:44.400 I probably haven't spent two consecutive weeks in my home. 0:15:47.080 --> 0:15:49.840 So when they said stay home, I had to get 0:15:49.880 --> 0:15:56.840 adjusted to not being busy, really just gets still, and 0:15:56.960 --> 0:16:00.480 that for me was traumatic. You know that about that? 0:16:01.000 --> 0:16:03.280 So here I am. I'm home. I'm not out in 0:16:03.280 --> 0:16:05.760 the world not doing my work. Who did you are? 0:16:06.160 --> 0:16:10.200 You know? So for many of us that was the issue. 0:16:10.240 --> 0:16:13.080 So you have the not being in control. What do 0:16:13.160 --> 0:16:15.680 I need to do to survive? And now my whole 0:16:15.800 --> 0:16:19.520 motus outa runde has been shifted, So that was challenged. 0:16:20.360 --> 0:16:22.440 And many of us had to be home with people 0:16:22.560 --> 0:16:26.560 that we love but don't like, so that was a 0:16:26.560 --> 0:16:30.080 whole another thing. So I think your question, when I'm 0:16:30.120 --> 0:16:35.720 hearing you ask, is how do you communicate compassionately with 0:16:35.960 --> 0:16:40.560 someone standing in a different way than you are. So 0:16:41.000 --> 0:16:50.320 compassion really is about seeing the position or suffering of 0:16:50.400 --> 0:16:56.920 another and taking action to alleviate the something. Like you said, 0:16:56.960 --> 0:16:59.520 you don't want to talk about it. Maybe somebody else does, 0:17:00.120 --> 0:17:03.880 but that's because their lack of control and their fear 0:17:04.359 --> 0:17:08.919 and their coping mechanism. Maybe talking about so how do 0:17:09.040 --> 0:17:12.840 you have compassion? And I think I heard you say 0:17:12.880 --> 0:17:14.880 it was your husband, so you can't tell him talk 0:17:14.880 --> 0:17:18.360 to me about that? What's said abound you? Okay, we're 0:17:18.400 --> 0:17:21.640 only gonna talk about this from six am to seven am, 0:17:21.640 --> 0:17:24.760 from noon to twelve thirty, from four pm to four 0:17:25.040 --> 0:17:27.520 five o'clock, and that's it. Other than that, I'm gonna 0:17:27.520 --> 0:17:30.120 ask you not to talk about its TV, and if 0:17:30.160 --> 0:17:33.920 you do, I'm gonna leave the room. Can we agree 0:17:33.960 --> 0:17:39.120 to that as opposed to he shouldn't be or they 0:17:39.119 --> 0:17:43.480 shouldn't be, or why do they compassion? See the position 0:17:43.600 --> 0:17:46.720 or the suffering of another person and then take action 0:17:46.800 --> 0:17:50.960 to alleviate the suffering without sacrificing yourself. You can talk 0:17:51.000 --> 0:17:53.320 about it for half an hour. You don't even have 0:17:53.680 --> 0:17:56.320 he's talking, You don't even have to respond. Your job 0:17:56.400 --> 0:18:00.679 is to listen and then what is your internal dialogue 0:18:00.880 --> 0:18:03.760 while he's talking, you know, like a lot of times, 0:18:03.800 --> 0:18:06.560 you know, people talk to me about everything in the supermarket, 0:18:06.600 --> 0:18:09.359 in the wal market, and in my brain, I'm in 0:18:09.440 --> 0:18:12.560 my mind, I'm saying, I don't have nothing to do it. 0:18:13.200 --> 0:18:16.320 It's I am not on this committee. I am not 0:18:16.400 --> 0:18:18.159 on the heel of your mother committee. This is what 0:18:18.200 --> 0:18:20.080 I'm saying in my brain. But I'm looking at her 0:18:20.240 --> 0:18:23.359 because she needed to talk. And when she was finished, 0:18:23.800 --> 0:18:26.959 I said, you should go online and get on my 0:18:27.000 --> 0:18:30.680 mailing list because my newsletter might be helpful to you. 0:18:30.160 --> 0:18:42.720 But got it. So that's what compassion is about, putting 0:18:43.080 --> 0:18:46.919 seeing where the other person is, seeing sense and feeling 0:18:46.960 --> 0:18:49.439 where the other person is and whether they're in a 0:18:49.480 --> 0:18:52.439 form of suffering or a form of fear or anger 0:18:52.640 --> 0:18:55.639 or whatever, and then doing what is required, what you 0:18:55.760 --> 0:18:59.520 can do without sacrificing your steps self to put an 0:18:59.640 --> 0:19:02.600 end of there, whatever it is they're going, because we 0:19:03.119 --> 0:19:06.959 we are traumatized. Yeah, and I guess I really have 0:19:07.160 --> 0:19:10.680 to open my mind and be mindful while we're having 0:19:10.680 --> 0:19:15.800 the conversation because he senses from me that my attitude is, oh, 0:19:15.960 --> 0:19:20.720 here we go again. That is not compassionate. That's not compassionate, 0:19:20.840 --> 0:19:33.400 and it's not helpful. I remember the day when George 0:19:33.480 --> 0:19:38.840 Floyd was murdered and everybody was in such uproar, and 0:19:39.040 --> 0:19:43.360 I said, thank you God for that angel named George 0:19:43.359 --> 0:19:47.880 Floyd who came to remind us yet again that we 0:19:48.160 --> 0:19:52.040 have to deal with this racism and we have to 0:19:52.119 --> 0:19:59.439 deal with these abuse. So now they're finding court officers, firemen, 0:19:59.760 --> 0:20:04.359 were tired police, retired military, all involved in this assault 0:20:04.640 --> 0:20:07.280 on the White House. So if they would go against 0:20:07.280 --> 0:20:10.600 a building because they didn't like what was going on 0:20:10.760 --> 0:20:12.879 in the building, what do you think they're going to 0:20:12.960 --> 0:20:16.240 do the people that they don't like, you know? And 0:20:16.359 --> 0:20:19.879 so I I my heart goes out to the Floyd 0:20:19.960 --> 0:20:24.160 family and the Martin family and the all of the families. 0:20:24.480 --> 0:20:28.040 But I've just seen all of these people as angels 0:20:28.040 --> 0:20:32.480 who have come and made a masterful, mighty sacrifice to 0:20:32.640 --> 0:20:37.280 wake us up. And we still ain't woke up because 0:20:38.000 --> 0:20:42.119 you know, we marched and screened and protested, which we 0:20:42.160 --> 0:20:45.560 needed to do for what three four months? You don't 0:20:45.600 --> 0:20:49.080 even hear George Floyd's name, So what are we gonna do? 0:20:50.480 --> 0:20:55.439 Everybody is talking about the fact that those protesters or 0:20:55.640 --> 0:20:59.360 rioters or insurrectionists or whatever they're being called today, we're 0:20:59.440 --> 0:21:02.960 able to roll up in the capital, thousands of them 0:21:03.000 --> 0:21:05.960 in the street, and people will say out loud, well, 0:21:06.000 --> 0:21:08.560 you know, it couldn't have been black people, and we'll 0:21:08.600 --> 0:21:11.359 say it. But what we're gonna do? What's our ask? 0:21:11.840 --> 0:21:14.959 What's our approach? What are we gonna do? What are 0:21:14.960 --> 0:21:16.800 we gonna do? We're just sitting here, one thing up 0:21:16.800 --> 0:21:20.119 our nose and the other one twiddling in our hair. Well, 0:21:20.160 --> 0:21:23.439 what are we gonna do? And until we get clear 0:21:23.840 --> 0:21:27.600 about what we're asking and what we're willing to do 0:21:27.960 --> 0:21:31.880 to get it, it's gonna keep happening. Thank you? Can 0:21:31.920 --> 0:21:34.840 you please say that again in Yana because I I 0:21:34.920 --> 0:21:38.760 feel so so strongly about it, and I'm just not 0:21:41.040 --> 0:21:45.119 I still am not clear on exactly that. What is 0:21:45.200 --> 0:21:50.720 our ask? And how are we going to hold this 0:21:50.840 --> 0:21:55.199 administration accountable or whoever we think needs to be held accountable? 0:21:55.520 --> 0:21:58.080 How are we going to do that? At? What is 0:21:58.119 --> 0:22:01.520 our act? That's the first thing, because until we're clear 0:22:01.920 --> 0:22:07.000 about the ask, we don't know who to approach. We 0:22:07.080 --> 0:22:09.520 don't have to approach. And you know I've said this 0:22:09.560 --> 0:22:12.040 for years everybody, please forgive me. Don't send me no 0:22:12.160 --> 0:22:15.600 emails and and send me dirty letters. I've said this 0:22:15.720 --> 0:22:20.639 for you, I've said it to all my friends and 0:22:20.720 --> 0:22:27.160 all my community leaders. For years. We've been affirming no justice, 0:22:27.280 --> 0:22:29.640 no peace. And I'm like, wait a minute, hold up, 0:22:30.280 --> 0:22:32.680 that's not what we want to say. We don't want 0:22:32.680 --> 0:22:36.560 to say no justice, no peace. We want to say 0:22:37.000 --> 0:22:41.440 justice now, peace now. But we the very thing we've 0:22:41.480 --> 0:22:44.679 been saying is exactly what we have, no what we're getting, 0:22:44.760 --> 0:22:49.240 and no justice for And I'm like, oh, we can't. 0:22:49.280 --> 0:22:51.639 But you know, we get into the slogans and we 0:22:51.760 --> 0:22:54.439 get into the thing, and that's what we want to do. No, no, no, 0:22:54.440 --> 0:22:57.560 no no. So we've got to get clear about the ask. 0:22:58.040 --> 0:23:01.480 If we're asking for justice, what does that look like? 0:23:02.160 --> 0:23:04.239 And the other thing is, you know, I know you. 0:23:04.440 --> 0:23:06.920 I'm a child of the fifties and the sixties. I'm 0:23:06.960 --> 0:23:10.760 a panther and you know, snick and the at all 0:23:10.760 --> 0:23:14.520 of this, and we had leaders, and so everybody is 0:23:14.560 --> 0:23:18.959 looking for a leader. But the piece that I find 0:23:19.600 --> 0:23:23.800 was then that I can't quite put my finger on now. 0:23:24.359 --> 0:23:30.159 Back then, there was a communal commitment to whatever it was, 0:23:30.200 --> 0:23:35.000 whether it was the free breakfast program or whatever, voting 0:23:35.080 --> 0:23:40.200 rights or early chilement education, there was a communal commitment. 0:23:40.280 --> 0:23:44.480 But now we are so busy, you know, with everything else, 0:23:44.680 --> 0:23:48.320 and we get all into personalities or I don't like 0:23:48.359 --> 0:23:50.080 this when you can't trust that, when you can't do this, 0:23:50.200 --> 0:23:52.919 you can't do that, and this cancel culture where we 0:23:52.960 --> 0:23:57.760 don't tolerate mistakes and we don't tear people down. So 0:23:58.040 --> 0:24:01.119 there's no focal point. I don't even want to say leadership, 0:24:01.359 --> 0:24:04.200 but there's no focal point. And then the people that 0:24:04.240 --> 0:24:07.840 we have elected, you know, they don't seem to be 0:24:07.880 --> 0:24:10.920 coming out to ask us. So anyway, that's my little soapbox. 0:24:11.240 --> 0:24:14.760 But what do we ask? No, But it's important, Yeah, 0:24:14.800 --> 0:24:17.240 it's important, Like how do we get that? How do 0:24:17.320 --> 0:24:21.600 we get back into that space? Is there? I don't 0:24:21.600 --> 0:24:24.520 want to say committee, but who are the leaders that 0:24:24.560 --> 0:24:29.800 we gathered together together to get us focused. Here's from 0:24:29.840 --> 0:24:33.520 the gammy again. You know, I come up out of 0:24:33.560 --> 0:24:42.640 that community spirit. So we've become such individuals and seeking 0:24:42.720 --> 0:24:48.680 such individual fame and glory and advancement and notice and recognition, 0:24:49.640 --> 0:24:54.399 until the things that would support and matter to us 0:24:54.480 --> 0:25:01.080 all can't seem to come together, and we're so eager 0:25:01.400 --> 0:25:06.679 to be against something that we have lost the to 0:25:06.840 --> 0:25:11.800 know how to be for something. Against this, Oh I'm 0:25:11.840 --> 0:25:14.600 against that, I'm against you, I'm against him, I'm against her. 0:25:14.720 --> 0:25:18.840 But what are we for? And where are those communications coming? 0:25:19.480 --> 0:25:25.680 Black radio is gone. I remember Bob Law from years ago, 0:25:25.960 --> 0:25:29.119 night Talk and if you wanted to get some information 0:25:29.119 --> 0:25:31.680 about what was going on in our community, you went 0:25:31.720 --> 0:25:33.720 to Bob Law and night Talk and you get the 0:25:33.760 --> 0:25:37.040 whole Where where do we go now as a community 0:25:37.160 --> 0:25:42.000 to get information? And then because the small stations are gone, 0:25:42.119 --> 0:25:46.639 is these big conglomerations lest your Facebook? But you know 0:25:47.760 --> 0:25:51.960 there's no communal meeting place, there's no communal mind. Yes, 0:25:52.119 --> 0:25:57.280 there are small organizations. You know. Right now everything is 0:25:57.560 --> 0:26:00.000 or isn't black lives matter. If you're not in Black 0:26:00.160 --> 0:26:01.959 Lives Matter, how do you find out what's going on? 0:26:02.080 --> 0:26:04.200 And then if you're in Black Lives Matter or you're 0:26:04.200 --> 0:26:07.800 against this and there against that, it's it's crazy, but 0:26:08.200 --> 0:26:12.800 that's how things are changing. So my thinking, this is 0:26:12.840 --> 0:26:14.639 just my thinking. This don't have nothing to do with 0:26:14.640 --> 0:26:19.320 no behind My thinking is let me continue to work 0:26:19.400 --> 0:26:24.080 with individuals and get individuals clear in their thinking and 0:26:24.119 --> 0:26:28.240 then there being and they'll be guided and directed into 0:26:28.280 --> 0:26:30.240 what to do and how to do it. So that's 0:26:30.320 --> 0:26:33.679 my contribution because if you told me today we're to go, 0:26:33.720 --> 0:26:39.119 I give to the Congressional Black Caucus, United Vigor College 0:26:39.160 --> 0:26:43.239 Run Black Lives, Sank Jude's Children Hospital. But nobody has 0:26:43.240 --> 0:26:47.080 ever called me to collectively have a discussion about anything. 0:26:48.640 --> 0:26:52.040