1 00:00:03,000 --> 00:00:09,360 Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning, 2 00:00:10,640 --> 00:00:16,160 Speaker 1: This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's 3 00:00:16,239 --> 00:00:22,320 Speaker 1: tip is that conversation breeds conversation. The more you talk 4 00:00:22,360 --> 00:00:24,720 Speaker 1: with a person, the more you have to say to 5 00:00:24,760 --> 00:00:29,600 Speaker 1: each other. Far from exhausting topics, When you know about 6 00:00:29,600 --> 00:00:33,080 Speaker 1: a person's daily life, you are able to pick up 7 00:00:33,120 --> 00:00:38,760 Speaker 1: on these threads and expand from there. So plenty of 8 00:00:38,920 --> 00:00:42,200 Speaker 1: people with full lives would like to have closer relationships 9 00:00:42,240 --> 00:00:45,320 Speaker 1: with their extended families, but when they find time in 10 00:00:45,320 --> 00:00:48,879 Speaker 1: their busy schedules to get together, they sometimes discover that 11 00:00:48,920 --> 00:00:52,960 Speaker 1: they don't have much to talk about. After a lackluster 12 00:00:53,080 --> 00:00:56,280 Speaker 1: family dinner, you might decide that you are just not 13 00:00:56,400 --> 00:00:59,760 Speaker 1: that close to the relatives and downgrade your relationship to 14 00:00:59,840 --> 00:01:02,280 Speaker 1: a we will see you at Thanksgiving sort of thing. 15 00:01:03,640 --> 00:01:07,679 Speaker 1: But I think there is another option. My Best of 16 00:01:07,720 --> 00:01:11,280 Speaker 1: Both World's co host Sarah hart Unger noted that with 17 00:01:11,400 --> 00:01:15,280 Speaker 1: her extended family, she has found that the more you talk, 18 00:01:15,959 --> 00:01:18,880 Speaker 1: the more you have to say. She has a group 19 00:01:18,920 --> 00:01:21,120 Speaker 1: text going with her family where they share details of 20 00:01:21,200 --> 00:01:24,920 Speaker 1: daily life, so when she sees her family, they already 21 00:01:25,000 --> 00:01:28,160 Speaker 1: know about their recent search for a car. Or her 22 00:01:28,200 --> 00:01:31,800 Speaker 1: foray into pilates, and she knows the headlines of their 23 00:01:31,840 --> 00:01:36,720 Speaker 1: lives too. All of this suggests conversation topics that can 24 00:01:36,800 --> 00:01:41,320 Speaker 1: be continued. Now. I know that group texts could get 25 00:01:41,360 --> 00:01:45,480 Speaker 1: a bad reputation. It is true that some people hijack 26 00:01:45,560 --> 00:01:49,840 Speaker 1: them or post a lot, but you can be judicious 27 00:01:49,880 --> 00:01:54,080 Speaker 1: about these things. You don't have to include every relative 28 00:01:54,720 --> 00:01:58,480 Speaker 1: on every group text. Maybe you have one for the 29 00:01:58,480 --> 00:02:01,920 Speaker 1: few that you are closest to and include them on 30 00:02:02,000 --> 00:02:05,800 Speaker 1: the details of your life. If you haven't had one going, 31 00:02:06,640 --> 00:02:09,960 Speaker 1: maybe just try starting one. You might have to do 32 00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:13,560 Speaker 1: the first few posts, or be strategic about posting things 33 00:02:13,560 --> 00:02:16,920 Speaker 1: that loop the others in, like mentioning your kid's dance 34 00:02:16,960 --> 00:02:20,880 Speaker 1: class and asking your sister if she remembers the tap 35 00:02:20,919 --> 00:02:23,760 Speaker 1: class you two took together on a thread with all 36 00:02:23,800 --> 00:02:27,160 Speaker 1: your siblings. But this is kind of like starting a fire. 37 00:02:28,120 --> 00:02:31,560 Speaker 1: Sometimes it takes some work, but then it can go 38 00:02:31,680 --> 00:02:35,200 Speaker 1: for a while. If you are not into texting, maybe 39 00:02:35,200 --> 00:02:38,959 Speaker 1: there's something else that works. Emails might so do quick 40 00:02:39,000 --> 00:02:42,720 Speaker 1: phone calls with some relatives. You might worry about not 41 00:02:42,760 --> 00:02:44,800 Speaker 1: being able to get off the phone when you have 42 00:02:44,840 --> 00:02:47,640 Speaker 1: a million things to do, but you can, in fact 43 00:02:47,680 --> 00:02:52,040 Speaker 1: start each conversation with boundaries. I'm picking up Jane at 44 00:02:52,080 --> 00:02:53,799 Speaker 1: soccer and need to go as soon as she gets 45 00:02:53,800 --> 00:02:55,840 Speaker 1: in the car, but I just wanted to check in 46 00:02:56,600 --> 00:03:01,200 Speaker 1: that sort of thing. But when you talk frequently text frequently, 47 00:03:01,880 --> 00:03:07,320 Speaker 1: you start to get enough details that conversations can actually happen. 48 00:03:08,760 --> 00:03:11,440 Speaker 1: I have had the happy experience a few times in 49 00:03:11,480 --> 00:03:15,639 Speaker 1: my life of meeting people in person who have listened 50 00:03:15,800 --> 00:03:19,800 Speaker 1: to lots of my podcasts, so they know enough details 51 00:03:19,840 --> 00:03:23,400 Speaker 1: of my life that they automatically share things from their 52 00:03:23,440 --> 00:03:26,720 Speaker 1: lives that they know I will find interesting, and they 53 00:03:26,760 --> 00:03:29,720 Speaker 1: ask questions that they know I'll probably have something to 54 00:03:29,720 --> 00:03:34,280 Speaker 1: say about. It makes the conversation so much easier versus 55 00:03:34,320 --> 00:03:36,920 Speaker 1: when you don't know much about each other, so you're 56 00:03:36,960 --> 00:03:43,040 Speaker 1: always just grasping for common ground. Oh, Cleveland, I was 57 00:03:43,080 --> 00:03:48,120 Speaker 1: in Cleveland once. It can be rough knowing lots of details. 58 00:03:48,800 --> 00:03:52,800 Speaker 1: Let's you skip all that. A group chat or email 59 00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:56,080 Speaker 1: thread lets you get to that happy place. So if 60 00:03:56,120 --> 00:03:58,160 Speaker 1: you want to have something to talk about with the 61 00:03:58,160 --> 00:04:02,720 Speaker 1: people in your life, unicate with them more frequently and 62 00:04:02,840 --> 00:04:09,240 Speaker 1: share more specifics. Real conversation now makes real conversation later 63 00:04:10,120 --> 00:04:17,080 Speaker 1: easier and richer. In the meantime, this is Laura. Thanks 64 00:04:17,120 --> 00:04:21,720 Speaker 1: for listening, and here's to making the most of our time. 65 00:04:28,200 --> 00:04:32,600 Speaker 1: Thanks for listening to Before Breakfast. If you've got questions, ideas, 66 00:04:32,760 --> 00:04:36,160 Speaker 1: or feedback, you can reach me at Laura at Laura 67 00:04:36,279 --> 00:04:45,560 Speaker 1: vandercam dot com. Before Breakfast is a production of iHeartMedia. 68 00:04:46,240 --> 00:04:50,200 Speaker 1: For more podcasts from iHeartMedia, please visit the iHeartRadio app, 69 00:04:50,480 --> 00:05:03,039 Speaker 1: Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.