Speaker 1: Episode fifty five, what to do when you feel like
Speaker 1: giving up. Welcome to the Frugal Friends podcast, where you'll
Speaker 1: learn to save money, embrace simplicity, rights, and liver with
Speaker 1: your life. Here your host Jen and Jill Boom boom boom. Hey, guys,
Speaker 1: welcome to the Frugal Friends podcast. My name is Jen. Hey, welcome, Welcome.
Speaker 1: This is Jill. Today, we have another listener request from
Speaker 1: our Facebook community group about what to do when you
Speaker 1: feel like giving up on your debt free journey or
Speaker 1: your savings goals, or anything to do with your financial
Speaker 1: goals when your willpowers depleted, all of that stuff, And
Speaker 1: it's an important topic that doesn't get talked about a ton,
Speaker 1: but it is the biggest of every financial goal is
Speaker 1: just maintaining it. So we're really really excited to talk
Speaker 1: about this one. So first let's get into our sponsors. Jill,
Speaker 1: our other sponsor today is absolutely not fictitious and is
Speaker 1: kind of offended that you would say that. It's the
Speaker 1: prefrontal cortex. Oh not just responsible for your personality and
Speaker 1: will to live. It plays a major role in self
Speaker 1: control and decision making. Want to be better at those things,
Speaker 1: then you'll want a better faster, stronger prefrontal cortex. Premium
Speaker 1: upgrades to the prefrontal cortex are available through sleep, meditation
Speaker 1: and a nutritious diet. The prefrontal cortex improve yours today. Um,
Speaker 1: that's one of my favorites. Like definitely, so yeah, good
Speaker 1: work science, so science, and we're going to get a
Speaker 1: little science with you today, but not too much like
Speaker 1: just tying tiny bit. When we're talking about tiny bit,
Speaker 1: I mean we're talking about some decision making and lessening
Speaker 1: stress and all of that stuff because that all plays
Speaker 1: a part in increasing motivation and willpower. So well, Science
Speaker 1: will be happy our previous sponsor, science, right, we like
Speaker 1: to make our previous sponsors happy. Yes, we are all
Speaker 1: about that. So we are getting into this first article
Speaker 1: by life hack dot org and good Yes, seven things
Speaker 1: to do when you feel like giving up mm hmmm yes,
Speaker 1: which she'll this is not particularly finance related, right, You
Speaker 1: can apply what we're talking about any area of life. However,
Speaker 1: we are tailoring this to your financial goals brugal living.
Speaker 1: Like Jen said, all these things surrounding finances. But of
Speaker 1: course any of these skills that you already do or
Speaker 1: learn more about can be implemented other aspects of life.
Speaker 1: Just like so much of what we talk about frugality
Speaker 1: and being wise with finances intersects all other aspects. So
Speaker 1: just like we can become unmotivated in our work life,
Speaker 1: we can become unmotivated in our savings, budgeting, debt, free living. Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so I think it's a really fantastic thing to explore,
Speaker 1: and I like what this article has to say. It's
Speaker 1: it's simple. It talks about seven things that you can
Speaker 1: incorporate when you're feeling unmotivated, and the first one that
Speaker 1: they list I love. We even did an episode about this,
Speaker 1: but it's talking about going back to your why when
Speaker 1: you're in a place of feeling unmotivated. I think an
Speaker 1: important thing to note about feeling unmotivated is that you
Speaker 1: don't want to do anything about it. Right. We're not
Speaker 1: talking about like what to do when you're on a roll.
Speaker 1: We're talking I know that I'm not motivated, but I
Speaker 1: can't bring myself to do this thing I don't want to.
Speaker 1: So yeah, it does take some effort to become motivated again,
Speaker 1: but they need to be easy enough steps. They need
Speaker 1: to be tangible enough that you could do it even
Speaker 1: when you feel like you don't want to, and so
Speaker 1: this one is one that can just happen in your mind. Right,
Speaker 1: You don't even have to get up off the couch
Speaker 1: to do this one, to go back to your why.
Speaker 1: And and a lot of times right we start with
Speaker 1: a vision of what our why is for the debt
Speaker 1: free living, for the savings goals or whatever, but sometimes
Speaker 1: we can wind up so far away from that original idea.
Speaker 1: So this article recommends revisiting your why every ninety days,
Speaker 1: which is another reason why budgeting on a regular basis
Speaker 1: can be so important to maintaining those goals. Hopefully you're
Speaker 1: budgeting more often than every ninety days, and so it
Speaker 1: does kind of bring you back to this why each
Speaker 1: time if that's a regular practice. So that's just a
Speaker 1: side note. But then I would also say to consider
Speaker 1: if your why is even worthwhile. Sometimes a lack of
Speaker 1: motivation can come from not even genuinely embracing your why,
Speaker 1: or your why not being realistic or a part of
Speaker 1: your daily functioning anymore. Like your why could have previously
Speaker 1: been so you could get your dream job, but since
Speaker 1: then you got married and you've got three kids, and
Speaker 1: that's not important to you anymore. So like it also
Speaker 1: could mean develop the new why so that you can
Speaker 1: regain motivation. What do you think about it? Yeah, so,
Speaker 1: I I mean, if you want to hear more about
Speaker 1: defining your why, especially defining it for frugality, check out
Speaker 1: our episode seventeen where we talk all about that. UM.
Speaker 1: But yeah, we just always believe that the Y is
Speaker 1: never the financial goal. The Y is never the destination.
Speaker 1: The Y is always the journey and the people who
Speaker 1: surround you on that journey, UM and all of that.
Speaker 1: And so I think it's always worthwhile to reset and
Speaker 1: make sure that the things you're doing are beneficial and
Speaker 1: not like hindering those relationships that you're trying to do
Speaker 1: this for. Because I can also be really easy, especially
Speaker 1: like in a marriage relationship or with kids. If you're
Speaker 1: very on fire, it can be you know, one sort
Speaker 1: of damaging, and then if you're very not on like
Speaker 1: opposite of fire, like drowning, it's another kind of damaging.
Speaker 1: So like going back to your why, it's kind of
Speaker 1: like the simplest first thing you can do. Are you
Speaker 1: using fire as in like the acronym financial independence entire earlier?
Speaker 1: You like, actually fire, you're on fire? Fire like the flame.
Speaker 1: Thank you, thanks for that clarification. Yes, what else did
Speaker 1: you like on this list? So I really loved the
Speaker 1: second one. That was probably my favorite one on this list.
Speaker 1: But like, learn to feel uncomfortable, because most of these
Speaker 1: goals are really stretching and they will really make you uncomfortable.
Speaker 1: You're gonna have to say no to things that you
Speaker 1: really want in the moment, and it really stretches you,
Speaker 1: and sometimes you just get tired of being uncomfortable, like
Speaker 1: but always you're like, nobody wants to feel uncomfortable. It's
Speaker 1: not a pleasant state. But learning to sustain those feelings
Speaker 1: of discomfort for longer and more frequently can help them
Speaker 1: become less uncomfortable. So saying no to the Starbucks drive
Speaker 1: through so many times, eventually driving past it isn't going
Speaker 1: to be uncomfortable. Um or you can you can move
Speaker 1: things from being acutely painful to dull discomfort, right right, Yes,
Speaker 1: that's fantastic. Physical therapists everywhere are probably like, that's fantastic.
Speaker 1: That's what I do every day. I help people, you know,
Speaker 1: reorient what pain means in their lives. So right, yeah,
Speaker 1: and I need that for our wallets. I'm not like
Speaker 1: a therapist. So I'm not saying like, sit in your pain,
Speaker 1: sitting it, but I am discomfort. If something makes you uncomfortable,
Speaker 1: then go ahead and and try and sitting it. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I like this one. Yeah, of course to a point, right,
Speaker 1: like don't sit in starvation, don't don't in something that's
Speaker 1: not healthy for you. But yeah, that's that's different. Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: moving on number three. Persistence. I like this one because
Speaker 1: it's just a fun word to say, right, persistent persistence.
Speaker 1: And so this is referring to understanding and having a
Speaker 1: fundamental belief that persistence will deliver results and that can
Speaker 1: help you to keep moving moving forward. So this is consistency.
Speaker 1: This is if at first you don't succeed, try try again,
Speaker 1: you know, like that little kid's proverb. Of course, don't
Speaker 1: keep trying on something that is fundamentally not going to
Speaker 1: work or not a part of your ethos or values
Speaker 1: or skill set. But if you if you're excited about
Speaker 1: something and you want to move forward, just keep going.
Speaker 1: And that sometimes even just the act of the consistency,
Speaker 1: even when you don't feel like doing it, can help
Speaker 1: propel motivation. So sit down and do that budget again,
Speaker 1: even though you don't want to do it, just keep
Speaker 1: doing it, Keep doing it, keep doing it. It'll form
Speaker 1: muscle memory. Yeah, definitely, And that's I mean, and that's
Speaker 1: a part of forming habits, and that's something we're going
Speaker 1: to talk about later. So number four, I love this one.
Speaker 1: Share your goals. So when you are on the brink
Speaker 1: of giving up and you're just gonna throw down money
Speaker 1: on that cruise vacation because you are done with paying
Speaker 1: off debt, you are done with this, share your goals
Speaker 1: with someone and yeah, find an accountability buddy and see
Speaker 1: how they feel about your cruise vacation drains. They might
Speaker 1: help derail you. I'm coming to find the right accountability
Speaker 1: buddy for friends, community group. Yes, right, they are right there.
Speaker 1: Grand accountability buddies. Um. But even on like Instagram or
Speaker 1: Facebook or wherever you're you frequent on social sharing your goals,
Speaker 1: putting them out in public, yes, it's super scary because
Speaker 1: you might fail and sharing them doesn't like decreate like,
Speaker 1: doesn't mean you're not going to fail at them. But
Speaker 1: when you share your goals, you're making that public declaration
Speaker 1: and it does help motivate you a little bit more
Speaker 1: to keep going And I also like the feature that
Speaker 1: Facebook will have. They'll show you things that you've posted
Speaker 1: from like one year ago or two years ago. So
Speaker 1: that's another park. If you like posted on Facebook, you'll
Speaker 1: be able to see like tangible progress, right, or you'll
Speaker 1: you'll be depressed one year later when that goal has
Speaker 1: completely fall into the wayside. No, you're gonna see tangible
Speaker 1: progress or it'll either way. It will be good because
Speaker 1: it could motivate you to be like, oh, yeah, I
Speaker 1: remember that goal and here's where I went wrong, and
Speaker 1: I'm going to do better this time persistently. Yes. I
Speaker 1: also like number five. It talks about acknowledging challenges. So
Speaker 1: this is it is straightforward as straightforward as it sounds.
Speaker 1: Recognize that they will come. Challenges are going to happen,
Speaker 1: and even having that recognition in anticipation for that will
Speaker 1: help you to weather them. It will help you to
Speaker 1: even build resistance or resilience when they do come. So
Speaker 1: rather than thinking that it's going to be rainbows and
Speaker 1: bunnies and sunshine, that no, this is gonna be tough.
Speaker 1: I there will be times when I fail at this
Speaker 1: or this whole thing is derailed or unexpected costs come
Speaker 1: in all right. That doesn't have to knock your feet out.
Speaker 1: Expect that it's going to come. Don't don't hyper focus
Speaker 1: on the challenge leunges, but know that they're going to happen,
Speaker 1: and that can even help you during those times to
Speaker 1: not completely lose your motivation. Yeah, I mean, have grace
Speaker 1: for yourself. You're going to not be perfect, sorry about that,
Speaker 1: and that's yeah. Sorry. That's something that I've liked with
Speaker 1: so many of the interviews that we've done, and I
Speaker 1: think particularly the one with Alison Uh that one stands
Speaker 1: out to me where we discussed how there were times
Speaker 1: that the pause button was put on certain financial goals
Speaker 1: or almost seeing it as a road trip, that there
Speaker 1: are times when you pull over to a rest stop,
Speaker 1: or you stop for gas, or you stop for some
Speaker 1: sight seeing. Same thing here in recognize that it is
Speaker 1: even okay that there's gonna be times when you have
Speaker 1: you add a child to your family, you buy a
Speaker 1: new home, you've got to do a renovation, you need
Speaker 1: to buy a new car, and so you're not always
Speaker 1: going to be able to do the gazelle thing budget.
Speaker 1: So yeah, I mean, all of these aspects are important
Speaker 1: to know about it. Yeah. For some reason, we think
Speaker 1: that like a challenge accepted means that we won't have
Speaker 1: any bumps, like and we are down when we do,
Speaker 1: even if those bumps are really great, um no, they're
Speaker 1: Just put that out of your mind right now and
Speaker 1: know that the challenges, the bumps, the blocks, those are
Speaker 1: part of the road and just expect them. Yeah, and
Speaker 1: if you want to hear some good payoff stories that
Speaker 1: have some bumps, Allison from Inspired Budget and Merrily from
Speaker 1: Easy Budget. Those are two great interviews we've done that
Speaker 1: really focus on those things. Yeah, but get back on
Speaker 1: the road. Don't let that renovation of your new home
Speaker 1: derail you forever. Like, don't don't pitch tent at the
Speaker 1: rest stop. No one wants to sleep there for months
Speaker 1: on end. Get back on the road. Oh yeah, because
Speaker 1: rest stops are hugely gross. So yeah, yeah, you don't
Speaker 1: want to stay there, but just there for the twenty
Speaker 1: minute nap. That's all that is. I have definitely taken
Speaker 1: a nap at a rest stop parking lot. We all have, yeah,
Speaker 1: but we haven't lived there exactly. Words of wisdom, which
Speaker 1: also if you need motivation, just turn on this episode
Speaker 1: where we're telling you to get back on the road. Yes,
Speaker 1: pay attention, keep driving amen. Yes all right. Number six
Speaker 1: is get happy, So he says, we all get in
Speaker 1: a funk every now and again, totally normal. But instead
Speaker 1: of lying on the sofa and eating ice cream out
Speaker 1: of the tub and watching your favorite sitcom, get happy.
Speaker 1: Which sometimes those things do make me happy, but like
Speaker 1: not for very long. It's like a rest stop. It
Speaker 1: can make me happy for twenty minutes, and then I
Speaker 1: have to actually do something that sparks joy in me.
Speaker 1: And that's usually not touching my clothing but hashtag Marie condo. Yes,
Speaker 1: spending some real time with friends or doing something productive,
Speaker 1: actually organizing like does make me happy because I'm one
Speaker 1: of those people. But yeah, doing something that makes you
Speaker 1: feel happy, yeah, And he also cites thinking back to
Speaker 1: times in your life when you felt as though you
Speaker 1: were thriving or motivated or accomplished and incorporating some of
Speaker 1: those things that you remember being a part of your life. Then,
Speaker 1: whether that was a certain album you were listening to
Speaker 1: at the time, or a certain hobby you were doing
Speaker 1: at the time time or whatever, even incorporating some of
Speaker 1: those things can help get you back in a rhythm.
Speaker 1: Of feeling motivated and accomplished and purposeful. And last but
Speaker 1: not least, on this list of seven, number seven, be
Speaker 1: proud of your accomplishments. And I think this is such
Speaker 1: a wise insightful tip here because we can often breathe
Speaker 1: right by the times when we are accomplishing something, or
Speaker 1: we have accomplished something, it's just like Okay, great, I
Speaker 1: did that, and you move right along to the next thing,
Speaker 1: like what's next, and you lose the celebration of it.
Speaker 1: You lose the encouragement of it, the way that it
Speaker 1: is spurring you on to do more. So pause, celebrate,
Speaker 1: be proud of it, share it, Share it with us
Speaker 1: frugal friends over on the Frugal Friends community Facebook page,
Speaker 1: because it is worth doing, because that that can be
Speaker 1: your one year pop up on Facebook. Remember when you
Speaker 1: accomplish this thing, the fact that you stop to celebrate
Speaker 1: it can help motivate you. Yes, and especially for you
Speaker 1: people out there that may have a hard time taking
Speaker 1: a compliment or maybe a people pleaser and you don't
Speaker 1: want to acknowledge your own accomplishments, or you think, heck
Speaker 1: I could do it, everybody can do it. That's it's
Speaker 1: it's whatever. No, even the smallest of accomplishments should be
Speaker 1: acknowledged and celebrated, and that will train you to celebrate
Speaker 1: the bigger accomplishments, because sometimes you do need to train
Speaker 1: yourself to celebrate yourself. Like that's so sad, but it's
Speaker 1: it's a reality for some people. Yeah, or let us
Speaker 1: celebrate you. Just post what you've accomplished and then we'll
Speaker 1: do it for you. Yes, I have a lot of emojis,
Speaker 1: I have a lot of gifts, and I have a
Speaker 1: lot of things to say. Let's be clear, encouraging. Whenever
Speaker 1: Jen says that it means g I F S, there's
Speaker 1: no tea involved there. She's not actually sending you some
Speaker 1: monetary gift. And for everybody who is in their head
Speaker 1: thinking it's jiffs, I say gifts on purpose because I
Speaker 1: feel like they're a little mini their gifts without the T,
Speaker 1: I just say g I F so that there's no
Speaker 1: confusion of whether I'm talking about peanut butter or like
Speaker 1: sending you a birthday present. Right, And I say gifts
Speaker 1: because then when I don't get my family a gift,
Speaker 1: I can send them a gift and be like this
Speaker 1: is what I meant. The whole time. Sorry, good job
Speaker 1: covering your bed on that one. Speaking of butts, our
Speaker 1: next article are you excited? Are you interested? Oh? I
Speaker 1: see where you're going with this. Yes. Our next articles
Speaker 1: from zen Habits and it's get off your butt sixteen
Speaker 1: ways to get motivated when you're in a slump. That
Speaker 1: was a fantastic transition. This is why you get paid
Speaker 1: the big bucks, right that three dollars an hour. If
Speaker 1: you're ever wondering why we always talk about getting paid
Speaker 1: three dollars an hour, it's references referencing our side Hustle
Speaker 1: episode where we realized that podcasting is like the bottom
Speaker 1: of the totem pole as far aside hustles go, and
Speaker 1: that they estimate on average people make three dollars an
Speaker 1: hour doing it. So but we we love and we
Speaker 1: work hard for every dollar of that, every penny of that.
Speaker 1: Mm hmm. Jill, what did you think of this episode?
Speaker 1: This episode? Are It's a fantastic episode, Get off your butt,
Speaker 1: Get motivated? Um? I liked it. I don't think that
Speaker 1: I totally resonated with all sixteen of the items listed
Speaker 1: in here, but I think that there are some nuggets
Speaker 1: worth discussing. So I think that the biggest thing is
Speaker 1: what to do to break out of the slump, like
Speaker 1: like we talked about at the beginning of the episode,
Speaker 1: when you don't feel like it, right, that's what we're
Speaker 1: talking about here, is of course, if we knew what
Speaker 1: to do or we felt like any motivated that we
Speaker 1: would do that thing. This is literally when it's like, no,
Speaker 1: I need somebody else to help me get off my butt.
Speaker 1: So one of my favorites on here, and we've talked
Speaker 1: about it already but can't emphasize this enough, is getting support.
Speaker 1: So it's hard to accomplish something alone. And we know
Speaker 1: this in any aspect of life, so particularly in this
Speaker 1: area of finances, if you can have a teammate or
Speaker 1: a small community or some frugal friends wink wink, you're
Speaker 1: all the more apt to be able to have others
Speaker 1: help to motivate you those times when you can't do
Speaker 1: it by yourself, to have somebody else to help remind you,
Speaker 1: help pull you up, help to celebrate the goal, the
Speaker 1: accomplishments with you. So having support, I think is a
Speaker 1: great one for motivation, but even accomplishment of goals in general. Yeah, definitely,
Speaker 1: we won't go through this whole article, because yeah, I
Speaker 1: agreed some of them are didn't resonate with and summer redundant,
Speaker 1: but I did like number one, which is focus on
Speaker 1: one goal. So I know a lot of people will
Speaker 1: try to do a financial goal coupled with a fitness goal,
Speaker 1: or maybe coupled with a side hustle goal. They just
Speaker 1: try to do multiple things at a time and then
Speaker 1: get overwhelmed when they're ebbing in one place and they're
Speaker 1: hittn a peak, hitting a valley, just it's all like
Speaker 1: then they hit all the valleys and all the places
Speaker 1: at the same time, and it's just very discouraging. Since
Speaker 1: I've read the One Thing by Gary Keller and j
Speaker 1: pops On, I've really been of this mindset that focusing
Speaker 1: on one goal at a time gets things done the quickest.
Speaker 1: And I think that's the reason that Dave Ramsey's program
Speaker 1: works so well because he doesn't have you paying off
Speaker 1: debt and saving for a home and investing and figuring
Speaker 1: out savings for other things like college. He doesn't have
Speaker 1: you doing all those things at the same time, which
Speaker 1: doesn't mean doing them at the same time it's bad.
Speaker 1: You definitely do them at the same time and be successful.
Speaker 1: But for a lot of people to decrease overwhelm, doing
Speaker 1: them one at a time really makes the goal more attainable,
Speaker 1: especially when you're starting out or feeling frustrated. There's no
Speaker 1: shame in that. Mm hmm. Yeah. And it's like you said,
Speaker 1: we're talking about when you're not feeling motivated. So there
Speaker 1: are times of motivation when we can tackle a few
Speaker 1: things at once, but when you're not feeling motivated, focus
Speaker 1: on one thing, which also is related to number eleven,
Speaker 1: which I really like, the start small, really small micro yes,
Speaker 1: so the and again this is great advice. When motivation
Speaker 1: is gone, it's depleted, it's not there, to just start small.
Speaker 1: And this can feel trite sometimes of doing a budget
Speaker 1: isn't really doing anything, no, but it is first of all,
Speaker 1: and then it builds upon itself and it can lead
Speaker 1: to greater and greater levels of motivation. It's a start,
Speaker 1: So just start small. And we talk about this on
Speaker 1: a variety of topics, but it's included here. This could
Speaker 1: even mean get off the couch. There you go, you
Speaker 1: accomplish that one very small thing. Now go get a
Speaker 1: piece of paper and a pencil. Now do your budget.
Speaker 1: Look at you. You've accomplished four things, aren't you so motivated? Yeah?
Speaker 1: I think we really underestimate and undervalue the concept of
Speaker 1: small steps. We think that if we're not doing it all,
Speaker 1: like go big or go home, Like, if we're not
Speaker 1: doing it all, what are we doing at all? When
Speaker 1: really the opposite is true, Like even a small step
Speaker 1: forward is better than paralyzing fear keeping you in one place.
Speaker 1: So don't be afraid of small And if you start
Speaker 1: what you think is small and it turns out to
Speaker 1: be too big for you and you get discouraged, just
Speaker 1: reset and and start a little smaller. It's fine. Eventually
Speaker 1: you'll get to there. But sometimes your reality of what
Speaker 1: is small is not the actual reality of a small step.
Speaker 1: Another one I liked on this is number nine, So
Speaker 1: realize there's an ebb and a flow. Motivation is not
Speaker 1: a constant thing. It comes and it goes. And I
Speaker 1: think the real message here is to do things even
Speaker 1: when you're not motivated. So motivation is great and you
Speaker 1: want to keep that. I forget who said it, but
Speaker 1: there's a quote about motivation. This is Motivation doesn't last.
Speaker 1: Um neither does showering. That's why we do it daily.
Speaker 1: That's probably totally botched, but something like that. Yeah, motivation
Speaker 1: isn't a bad thing, but it isn't always there. It
Speaker 1: is always going to be there, so you have to
Speaker 1: maintain your momentum and stick it out even when it's
Speaker 1: not there in time for it to come back, which
Speaker 1: I think it's worth acknowledging some of the reasons that
Speaker 1: motivation may not be present, and it could be because
Speaker 1: there's a decrease in income, or there has been some
Speaker 1: extreme laps in goals or possibly I mean it's a
Speaker 1: harsh statement, but failure and it's not a bad thing.
Speaker 1: We learn from it. But sometimes real life circumstances can
Speaker 1: take away the motivation because they're difficult to overcome and
Speaker 1: it's like, well, why even bother anymore. Sometimes motivation is
Speaker 1: just gone because it's gone and doesn't have much to
Speaker 1: do with life circumstances. But sometimes it's because there's some
Speaker 1: actual difficult things happening in life, which I think is
Speaker 1: why it's important to come back to these starting small,
Speaker 1: celebrating accomplishments, even if they are super small that okay,
Speaker 1: you got knocked down for a bit, you stopped at
Speaker 1: a rest stop, but you started up again. Celebrate that
Speaker 1: you started small. So and and then even knowing that
Speaker 1: these times will come, there will be times when our
Speaker 1: budget gets wiped out or something unexpected financially depletes us
Speaker 1: or whatever, that you can still get back to a
Speaker 1: place of accomplishing goals. And so to focus on that
Speaker 1: can be helpful in those times. Yeah, I agreed. And
Speaker 1: the last one that I want to point out on
Speaker 1: this list is to focus on the benefits, not just
Speaker 1: the difficulties. So that's number fifteen on this list. So
Speaker 1: that's not to say don't acknowledge the difficulties, because that's
Speaker 1: important in this process, but focusing on the good and
Speaker 1: the why of what you're doing can help in those
Speaker 1: times of lacking the will power or desire to do anything.
Speaker 1: What are the benefits? It's similar to the why, but
Speaker 1: it's it's like elaborating upon your why the benefits. Even
Speaker 1: in the journey to the why, there's benefits in that,
Speaker 1: So focus on that that will help. Yeah, So this
Speaker 1: can also be the things outside the why, like the
Speaker 1: actual accomplishments, and like kind of looking at what your
Speaker 1: life looks like with those accomplishments under your belt, and
Speaker 1: what you can do beyond that, And like the fact
Speaker 1: is is that you're actually not going to be able
Speaker 1: to fully comprehend what you can do once you've achieved
Speaker 1: your goals, Like you can't you can't even see everything
Speaker 1: that opens up to you until you actually get there,
Speaker 1: and so it's hard. It's sometimes hard to wrap your
Speaker 1: mind around all the things that are all the benefits
Speaker 1: that are available because you don't even know what those
Speaker 1: are yet. Um So, just like consider that too, that
Speaker 1: even beyond the benefits you can think of right now,
Speaker 1: there are so many more you will not be able
Speaker 1: to think or come up with until you would achieve
Speaker 1: your goal. Like that, it's kind of like like mystery.
Speaker 1: I want to I want to stay motivated and do
Speaker 1: this because there's mysterious treasures waiting for me. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: mean I only say that because it's in my own experience,
Speaker 1: Like a lot of the things that we've been able
Speaker 1: to accomplish and becoming debt free and becoming really avid savers,
Speaker 1: I could not have seen my life looking like this
Speaker 1: when I was twenty or five. I just didn't have
Speaker 1: a concept because it's not what I had seen growing up.
Speaker 1: It's not what I was seeing in the present. So
Speaker 1: I just didn't know it was available to me. And
Speaker 1: so that's how I learned by becoming debt free and
Speaker 1: living on less than one income. So take Jem's word
Speaker 1: for it. It's good. It's good over there on that
Speaker 1: other side. It's real great over here doing it, you know,
Speaker 1: it's real great. Also, Oh, I think I know. Is
Speaker 1: it the bill of the week. That's right, it's time
Speaker 1: for the best minute of your entire week. Maybe a
Speaker 1: baby was born and his name is William. Maybe you
Speaker 1: paid off your mortgage, Maybe your car died and you're
Speaker 1: happy to not have to pay that bill anymore. That
Speaker 1: build buffalo bills, Bill Clinton, this is the bill of
Speaker 1: the week. Hey, jenn and Jill, this is Katherine from Arkansas.
Speaker 1: Love your podcast. Um about the same age as you guys,
Speaker 1: and I feel like I can totally relate to the
Speaker 1: topics you talk about, and you're really helping me go
Speaker 1: down a really good path to being more frugal. My
Speaker 1: favorite bill is my balance transfer credit card bill. My
Speaker 1: husband and I had racked up quite a bit of
Speaker 1: credit card debt before we decided we wanted to be
Speaker 1: more frugal people. So in the process of trying to
Speaker 1: figure out how to best payoff that bill, came upon
Speaker 1: a zero percent balance transfer credit card for twenty one
Speaker 1: which we couldn't even find a personal loan for that,
Speaker 1: so we transferred our credit card debt to that zero
Speaker 1: percent balance transfer card and we made a payoff plan
Speaker 1: to pay it all off before without twenty one months
Speaker 1: is up. So we are paying off our credit card
Speaker 1: debt at zero percent interest, which I think is awesome.
Speaker 1: So love that bill. Love you guys, keep it up. Thanks,
Speaker 1: that is awesome. Catherine. Way way to be innovative and
Speaker 1: frugal Catherine from Arkansas. So good to hear from you.
Speaker 1: Thanks for sharing that one with us. It's being frugal
Speaker 1: in some wise ways and working towards some debt payoff creatively,
Speaker 1: and it's motivating me. I'm excited. I'm excited for you.
Speaker 1: I want you to like exceed that twenty one month goal,
Speaker 1: like not exceeded in months, but like paid off quicker
Speaker 1: than twenty one month. So I hope that you'll let
Speaker 1: us know if you do beat that goal, because I
Speaker 1: think it's also cool when you have a time limit
Speaker 1: where you're like, I have to pay it off by
Speaker 1: this day, and then you get really motivated. I think
Speaker 1: that can be like a really good motivator. If you're
Speaker 1: feeling like giving up, well, whenever it is paid off,
Speaker 1: feel free to let us know when the Frugal Friends
Speaker 1: Facebook community group and we will celebrate with you. Yes,
Speaker 1: and if you have a bill of the week that
Speaker 1: you'd like to share with us, visit Frugal Friends podcast
Speaker 1: dot com slash bill and you can leave us a
Speaker 1: speak pipe message or on our Google voicemail. We would
Speaker 1: love to hear your bills. Yes, we always love it chills.
Speaker 1: Second favorite time of the wooo, the lightning round. So
Speaker 1: what if you have already fallen off the horse, off
Speaker 1: the wagon, whatever metaphor you want to use, you're on
Speaker 1: the ground. Basically right now, you are on the ground.
Speaker 1: Probably you're like, I really need to get back on track.
Speaker 1: That is why you're listening to this episode. You don't
Speaker 1: just feel like giving up. You have given up again.
Speaker 1: You're on the ground, yes, and you're trying to get
Speaker 1: back on that horse, and the horse and the wagon
Speaker 1: have moved on ahead of you. I don't know where
Speaker 1: we are. We're on the organ trail. What did they
Speaker 1: do back then? Let oh, man, it's really dire, dire
Speaker 1: circumstances around here. What we gotta do, I'll tell you,
Speaker 1: don't worry. Focus on forming habits, put them in your schedule.
Speaker 1: Just just do it again, make it, make it muscle memory.
Speaker 1: So even though you don't feel like getting up off
Speaker 1: the ground, you might be suffering from Dysenterry, do what
Speaker 1: your body is is knows what to do, and that
Speaker 1: is just stand up right. Your body knows how to
Speaker 1: stand up. Do it. Yes, habits is a really big
Speaker 1: buzzword right now too, all kinds of books and podcasts
Speaker 1: and everything. But there's something to be said for that.
Speaker 1: I don't think it's just a buzzword because super popular.
Speaker 1: We are brain here's where the science is. Yes, yes,
Speaker 1: so our brain basically functions on our habits. We're creatures
Speaker 1: of habit and so habits can be formed, they can
Speaker 1: be improved and refined. You just have to focus on them.
Speaker 1: So if you're super interested in habit formation, you can
Speaker 1: read a book or listen to a podcast. But just
Speaker 1: know that our brains don't want to think about every
Speaker 1: single move that we're making. They want your prefrontal cortex
Speaker 1: likes to not have to make all the decisions. It's
Speaker 1: just it wants to rely on. I believe it's your
Speaker 1: hippocampus or some other part of your brain that just
Speaker 1: goes into autopilot. And if you're a neuroscientist, yes, yes, okay.
Speaker 1: So forming these good habits of good spending habits, good
Speaker 1: time management habits, what have you, and initially putting them
Speaker 1: on your schedule so you may a habit of doing
Speaker 1: them however frequently you want. And knowing that a habit
Speaker 1: does not form in three weeks like sometimes it takes
Speaker 1: months depending on how difficult the habit is make you
Speaker 1: take months to form a habit. So don't think like
Speaker 1: I'm doing this twenty one day challenge and I'm going
Speaker 1: to form a habit after it. No, it's just not
Speaker 1: how it works for most habits. Right, focus on forming habits.
Speaker 1: The second way to get back on track is similar
Speaker 1: to getting back your motivation or not falling off track,
Speaker 1: is getting an accountability partner. That is so important, especially
Speaker 1: if you have already fallen off once. Then you know
Speaker 1: how easy it is to do and you'll you could
Speaker 1: do it again. So know that you're prone to that
Speaker 1: and have somebody with you that you know is going
Speaker 1: to keep you on track, and so maybe that's a spouse,
Speaker 1: but maybe it's not. Your spouse isn't always on board
Speaker 1: with doing Why we're not always on the same page
Speaker 1: with everything always all the time. Yeah, I have to
Speaker 1: find somebody who's like actually on board and will keep
Speaker 1: you accountable and not make you feel bad when you're
Speaker 1: lying in the dirt and like laugh at you. But yeah,
Speaker 1: it's like, but hand you some hand sanitizing and toilet
Speaker 1: paper for the dissentery. Oh yes. Also set up your
Speaker 1: environment to aid in your success. So this means the
Speaker 1: people you surround yourself with, the places that you go to.
Speaker 1: We've even talked about this before with our no Spend
Speaker 1: challenge conversation of maybe even altering your route to work
Speaker 1: if you're going to pass by too many temptations, that
Speaker 1: will derail your motivation or your budget. So make sure
Speaker 1: that you're setting yourself up for success in what it
Speaker 1: is that you want to accomplish, and don't put barriers
Speaker 1: or intentional roadblocks in your way. Those are already going
Speaker 1: to come up, you don't. You don't have to set
Speaker 1: those up like they will happen, So do what you
Speaker 1: can to make sure you can accomplish your goals with
Speaker 1: as much ease as possible. Definitely, And our last tip
Speaker 1: for getting back on the horse and off the dysenterry
Speaker 1: is live by the mantra done is better than perfect.
Speaker 1: Put that on a bumper stick Yeah, we've got. If
Speaker 1: we were to go through our podcasts all the bumper
Speaker 1: stickers we'd we'd probably have a good pile of bumper stickers.
Speaker 1: We possibly cover an entire bumper for sure, could you imagine,
Speaker 1: and just motivational message and you could do them. Want
Speaker 1: that instead of fixing your bumper after that fender bender
Speaker 1: you were in. That's frugal girl. Did I tell you
Speaker 1: I did that? No? I did. I got hit. I
Speaker 1: got Yeah, I got hit and I took Maybe I
Speaker 1: backed into something. Maybe that's why I didn't get it fixed.
Speaker 1: One time I got hit and I didn't take the
Speaker 1: insurance money to fix my fender. The other time, maybe
Speaker 1: I backed into something but had a little hole. This
Speaker 1: is in a different car, and so I put a
Speaker 1: bumper sticker over it. Yes you did, Yes, I did. Oh,
Speaker 1: So maybe there's a good use for a bumper sticker.
Speaker 1: There you go. I'm on board with that good job.
Speaker 1: What was the bumper sticker? It was invisible children and
Speaker 1: bumper sticker because I had worked for them, so I
Speaker 1: got a free one. So that was that was it there,
Speaker 1: and it was fixed, and it was done and done.
Speaker 1: That better than perfect And that is the whole. That's
Speaker 1: about it. When you when you think about your finances,
Speaker 1: whether it's paying off debt, saving investing, you don't have
Speaker 1: to do it perfectly. You just have to do it.
Speaker 1: And starting is better than doing nothing right because sometimes
Speaker 1: sometimes lacking motivation, you don't you don't even want to
Speaker 1: take the first step. But if you can bring yourself,
Speaker 1: if you can get the willpower to do it, usually
Speaker 1: once you're in it, you enjoy it more than you
Speaker 1: think you will, It goes faster than you think it will.
Speaker 1: There's so many things that once you take that first step,
Speaker 1: the rest falls into place. Yeah, and don't don't worry
Speaker 1: about doing it wrong, because sometimes there is a wrong
Speaker 1: way to do things. But as long as you get
Speaker 1: started and you stay interested, even if you start out
Speaker 1: on the wrong path, you won't be on the wrong
Speaker 1: path for long. Um. You only stay on the wrong
Speaker 1: path if you just set it and forget it. Um,
Speaker 1: but you're listening to the Frugal Friends podcast, so you're
Speaker 1: not that type of person. Another wagon or horse will
Speaker 1: come along and say, what are you doing here? This
Speaker 1: isn't a watering hole. Get back on your horse or
Speaker 1: your wagon and that's it. It's May and we're reading
Speaker 1: The Soul of Money by Lynn Twist for our book club.
Speaker 1: We're still doing the book club, so get in on that. Yes,
Speaker 1: and if you want to get in with a free
Speaker 1: copy of The Soul of Money, because maybe they don't
Speaker 1: have it at your library, then you can win one.
Speaker 1: We do every month a drawing for our book club book.
Speaker 1: All you have to do to enter is leave us
Speaker 1: a review on iTunes or Stitcher, screenshot the review and
Speaker 1: send it to Frugal Friends podcast at gmail dot com,
Speaker 1: and we select one winner for every five reviews we
Speaker 1: get at the end of the month, and we will
Speaker 1: send you a used, cheap version of our book club book.
Speaker 1: It's used and it's the cheapest one we can find,
Speaker 1: So that's what you should expect if you win. Don't
Speaker 1: expect new I used book. Yes, it'll be used, but
Speaker 1: it'll still be the book. It'll still be all the
Speaker 1: contents that you need, it'll be very good quality. I
Speaker 1: don't buy a used book that's less than very good. Okay,
Speaker 1: good to know there are standards, and there's also standards
Speaker 1: for the review. And if you want to know how
Speaker 1: you might win yourself a very good used book, here's how.
Speaker 1: Here's how it's done. You leave a five star review.
Speaker 1: I mean that's just what a good a good review
Speaker 1: looks like. I'm not telling you where five star reviews
Speaker 1: because that's against terms of servants. I'm not telling you
Speaker 1: what you write who. I'm just telling you that when
Speaker 1: all the stars are colored in, it looks really nice.
Speaker 1: It's visually peasing. So I'm just it's informational. So this
Speaker 1: one comes from Danielle and they say funny and smart.
Speaker 1: Oh that if that is in a dynamic duo right
Speaker 1: there for what anybody would want in a podcast or
Speaker 1: a mate for life. I love Jen and Jill. I
Speaker 1: mean just the name Combo is incredible. These two make
Speaker 1: personal finance and frugality a fun topic to discuss. Their
Speaker 1: sponsors question mark, question mark, hysterical exclamation mark. They should
Speaker 1: definitely pursue a side hustle and stand up. Thank you, Danielle.
Speaker 1: This show makes me want to start a podcast with
Speaker 1: my bestie. Thank you for the actionable tips and relatable stories.
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, what if we had a Netflix special
Speaker 1: just about frugal comedy? We would, But I also think
Speaker 1: that I would definitely offend people. There's plenty that Eric
Speaker 1: has to edit out, both on the podcast and in
Speaker 1: our personal lives. That's not true. That's great to know
Speaker 1: that he's editing. Appreciate now he's not. But it is funny.
Speaker 1: There'll be times when, like someone will say something, I'll
Speaker 1: be like, that would have been edited that. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: love that. Well. If you want to hear the unedited
Speaker 1: version of our thoughts, definitely hang out with us at
Speaker 1: the Frugal Friends community on Facebook, at Frugal Friends podcast
Speaker 1: dot com, slash group and uh. If you want to
Speaker 1: hear our edited selves, then subscribed the podcast and we
Speaker 1: will be back every Friday with some more frugal goodness.
Speaker 1: Until then, we'll see you later, see yuh. Frugal Friends
Speaker 1: is produced, edited and mixed by Eric siria Um. The
Speaker 1: Prefrontal Cortex must have been a high paying sponsor to
Speaker 1: get a circle back at the end of the show. Yes, well,
Speaker 1: for high paying sponsors, we do offer them twice as
Speaker 1: much air time. Yeah, yeah, that I got a ton
Speaker 1: of exposure, which is fantastic because usually the prefrontal cortex
Speaker 1: is like covered by hair and stuff. So where is
Speaker 1: your prefrontal cortex, Jill? And it lends like right here,
Speaker 1: Oh well, if you have bangs, I have bangs. I
Speaker 1: have bangs which are not covered, like not down right now.
Speaker 1: I don't have my banks down right now. I gotta
Speaker 1: cut them there too long. But I'm in this weird
Speaker 1: phase where it looks like I'm trying to grow them out,
Speaker 1: but I'm not. I'm just too cheap to get another
Speaker 1: haircut that time. Of being cheap, I'm not really being frugal.
Speaker 1: I'm just like I can get to the hair dresser slash.
Speaker 1: I don't really have one. I don't even know what
Speaker 1: that means. It is, it's it's more work and expense
Speaker 1: to keep up with bangs. I didn't realize like hair
Speaker 1: grows fast. It does, especially when you're pregnant. Did you
Speaker 1: know that. I've heard that hair is healthy when you're pregnant,
Speaker 1: Like it gets really healthy and then you lose it,
Speaker 1: you lose clumps after giving birth. I'm getting a haircut
Speaker 1: before I give birth, just so that I don't have
Speaker 1: to have anybody like touching my hair while it's falling out. Wait,
Speaker 1: who's touching your hair? My hairdresser would be, oh, well,
Speaker 1: it's falling out. I guess yeah. I thought that this
Speaker 1: is going to be like a part of people coming
Speaker 1: over and helping you with the baby, that they'd be
Speaker 1: like stroking your head. I'm like, wait, mom, and I
Speaker 1: don't know all that that entails, but that's a new one.
Speaker 1: You can either bring me a meal, hold my baby,
Speaker 1: or touch my hair. Are the three ways that you
Speaker 1: can help me as I'm definitely going to choose like
Speaker 1: cleaning your bathroom, but I don't want any of the other.
Speaker 1: I don't want to stroke your head, I don't want
Speaker 1: to steal your baby. I don't want to cook. I'll
Speaker 1: clean your bathroom. Thank you, you got a friend in me,
Speaker 1: Jen