1 00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:13,440 Speaker 1: Hey, everybody, welcome back to the podcast. Thanks for being here. 2 00:00:14,200 --> 00:00:17,439 Speaker 1: I saw so many people this week. I got back 3 00:00:17,480 --> 00:00:21,960 Speaker 1: from Lebanon, Pennsylvania and saw so many of you and 4 00:00:23,520 --> 00:00:26,080 Speaker 1: people that came up. Were speaking at a banquet and 5 00:00:26,120 --> 00:00:27,480 Speaker 1: a lot of people come up and they're like, hey, 6 00:00:27,520 --> 00:00:30,720 Speaker 1: we listened to the podcast. And other people said, how's 7 00:00:30,720 --> 00:00:33,560 Speaker 1: your poison oak doing? And at first I was a 8 00:00:33,560 --> 00:00:35,479 Speaker 1: little bit caught off guard because I just thought, how 9 00:00:35,520 --> 00:00:37,320 Speaker 1: did you know that I had poison oak? I was 10 00:00:37,320 --> 00:00:40,400 Speaker 1: actually suffering badly, And they're like, you said it on 11 00:00:40,440 --> 00:00:44,200 Speaker 1: your podcast last week, so thank you. Sometimes I forget 12 00:00:44,240 --> 00:00:47,120 Speaker 1: what I say. It means the world that you guys 13 00:00:47,680 --> 00:00:52,519 Speaker 1: listen and care and come back a week after week. Uh, 14 00:00:52,600 --> 00:00:56,680 Speaker 1: put the poison ivy or oak, I should say, is better. 15 00:00:56,840 --> 00:01:01,120 Speaker 1: It's now it's all on my arm four under my 16 00:01:01,200 --> 00:01:05,000 Speaker 1: right arm, and that's new. It was all over my 17 00:01:05,120 --> 00:01:10,280 Speaker 1: side on my left ribcage and horrible. Actually, never I've 18 00:01:10,280 --> 00:01:11,800 Speaker 1: been in the woods my whole life, I've never had 19 00:01:11,840 --> 00:01:16,280 Speaker 1: poison oak until now, and it was it crushed me. 20 00:01:17,160 --> 00:01:19,600 Speaker 1: I cut some seater and it had a little bit 21 00:01:19,640 --> 00:01:23,600 Speaker 1: of I remember seeing it. It was really bright and vivid, 22 00:01:23,680 --> 00:01:26,280 Speaker 1: and I remember seeing that vine inside the seater that 23 00:01:26,319 --> 00:01:28,479 Speaker 1: I cut, and I remember thinking, oh, that's it's actually 24 00:01:28,560 --> 00:01:31,560 Speaker 1: really pretty. The leaves were really red and pretty, and 25 00:01:31,680 --> 00:01:35,520 Speaker 1: it got me and my brother Parker had poison ivy 26 00:01:35,600 --> 00:01:39,800 Speaker 1: ironically earlier this year, and so he had a prescription cream. 27 00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:42,200 Speaker 1: That's the only thing that's gotten to be better. So anyway, 28 00:01:42,200 --> 00:01:44,840 Speaker 1: thank you guys. I mentioned it last podcast, and it 29 00:01:44,880 --> 00:01:46,440 Speaker 1: was kind of shocked that I went to Pennsylvania and 30 00:01:46,480 --> 00:01:50,120 Speaker 1: people remember that. I love that you guys listen and 31 00:01:50,200 --> 00:01:52,200 Speaker 1: come back each week. If you want to ask me 32 00:01:52,240 --> 00:01:58,280 Speaker 1: a question, email podcast at grangersmith dot com. Podcast at 33 00:01:58,320 --> 00:02:00,720 Speaker 1: grangersmith dot com. It does not have to be any 34 00:02:00,800 --> 00:02:04,920 Speaker 1: kind of certain subject. It seems like the past probably 35 00:02:05,880 --> 00:02:09,079 Speaker 1: six to eight months, there's a lot of these theological 36 00:02:09,160 --> 00:02:10,880 Speaker 1: questions and it doesn't have to be that. So if 37 00:02:10,919 --> 00:02:13,400 Speaker 1: you if you tun tune into this podcast and you 38 00:02:13,440 --> 00:02:18,840 Speaker 1: say Granger answers all these theological God questions, Hey, I'm 39 00:02:18,919 --> 00:02:21,680 Speaker 1: just answering questions that you send, so we could talk 40 00:02:21,720 --> 00:02:23,920 Speaker 1: about whatever you want and we'll walk through it. We've 41 00:02:23,960 --> 00:02:27,520 Speaker 1: been doing this now, y'all going on eight years. Can 42 00:02:27,560 --> 00:02:30,240 Speaker 1: you believe that in this podcast going on eight years? 43 00:02:31,560 --> 00:02:34,680 Speaker 1: I can't even believe that. I can't that I can't 44 00:02:34,760 --> 00:02:39,080 Speaker 1: believe that we could even see the horizon of a decade. 45 00:02:39,960 --> 00:02:43,080 Speaker 1: That's crazy to me. The first question comes from James 46 00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:45,120 Speaker 1: as we get into this, and I like to say, James, 47 00:02:45,600 --> 00:02:47,280 Speaker 1: I want you guys to ask a question like we're 48 00:02:47,280 --> 00:02:50,240 Speaker 1: just sitting in the cab of a truck and something 49 00:02:50,280 --> 00:02:52,000 Speaker 1: comes up because something's on your mind. We got the 50 00:02:52,040 --> 00:02:54,359 Speaker 1: windows down and you say, hey, man, could I kind 51 00:02:54,360 --> 00:02:57,040 Speaker 1: of run something by it? That's that's the format of 52 00:02:57,080 --> 00:03:00,720 Speaker 1: this podcast. James says, Hi, Grande, I work a full 53 00:03:00,760 --> 00:03:04,640 Speaker 1: time job. I coach my son's Little league team. My 54 00:03:04,680 --> 00:03:06,880 Speaker 1: wife and I are trying to start a small business 55 00:03:06,880 --> 00:03:09,720 Speaker 1: on the side. I feel like I'm constantly running from 56 00:03:09,720 --> 00:03:11,480 Speaker 1: one thing to the next, and I don't have time 57 00:03:11,520 --> 00:03:15,040 Speaker 1: to breathe. How do you balance work, family, personal time 58 00:03:15,080 --> 00:03:18,200 Speaker 1: without feeling like you're always dropping the ball. Any tips 59 00:03:18,200 --> 00:03:21,320 Speaker 1: would be greatly appreciated. Thanks again for being a good 60 00:03:21,360 --> 00:03:25,440 Speaker 1: role model, James, James, thank you, brother. Appreciate the email 61 00:03:25,520 --> 00:03:32,280 Speaker 1: and the trust with a question like this, and certainly, man, 62 00:03:32,320 --> 00:03:38,920 Speaker 1: it's it's everyone listening thinks to themselves. Yeah, busy. It's 63 00:03:38,960 --> 00:03:43,560 Speaker 1: funny in the most hectic days of touring with the 64 00:03:43,600 --> 00:03:48,680 Speaker 1: band would be a city after city after city. You 65 00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:52,320 Speaker 1: kind of start every every city just starts to look 66 00:03:52,360 --> 00:03:55,800 Speaker 1: the same, especially in the summers when we do these fairs, 67 00:03:56,600 --> 00:03:59,720 Speaker 1: and every fair ground starts to look the same. So 68 00:03:59,760 --> 00:04:02,360 Speaker 1: you're like in Ohio, and then you're you're in Michigan, 69 00:04:02,400 --> 00:04:04,720 Speaker 1: and then you're in Illinois, and then you're in Indiana, 70 00:04:04,840 --> 00:04:09,040 Speaker 1: and it's they all it's like a a some kind 71 00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:12,840 Speaker 1: of dirt track and grandstands and ferris wheels and everything 72 00:04:12,840 --> 00:04:14,840 Speaker 1: behind that, and you could smell the same foods, and 73 00:04:15,600 --> 00:04:19,840 Speaker 1: it starts to all blend in together, and you a 74 00:04:19,880 --> 00:04:21,760 Speaker 1: lot of times would be playing with these other bands 75 00:04:22,080 --> 00:04:25,119 Speaker 1: and the buses would pull in in the night time 76 00:04:25,960 --> 00:04:28,200 Speaker 1: and we would all be sleeping, and you wake up 77 00:04:28,240 --> 00:04:32,000 Speaker 1: the next morning and catering would have breakfast and we 78 00:04:32,040 --> 00:04:35,840 Speaker 1: would come out of the bus and you know, you're 79 00:04:36,080 --> 00:04:39,960 Speaker 1: looking for coffee, and then the right across, you know, 80 00:04:40,160 --> 00:04:42,240 Speaker 1: in the parking spot next to you is another bus 81 00:04:42,240 --> 00:04:44,560 Speaker 1: and that door is opening and a guy's coming off 82 00:04:44,680 --> 00:04:48,800 Speaker 1: looking for coffee, and and you haven't seen him in 83 00:04:48,880 --> 00:04:52,039 Speaker 1: you know, eight months or since whenever last show you played, 84 00:04:52,080 --> 00:04:56,120 Speaker 1: and hey, how's it going right there? Right there there's 85 00:04:56,160 --> 00:05:00,400 Speaker 1: this moment how's it going when the other guy would 86 00:05:00,480 --> 00:05:05,200 Speaker 1: say busy, and then he looks at you and he goes, 87 00:05:05,760 --> 00:05:10,840 Speaker 1: how about you guys, and you go busy? And I 88 00:05:11,160 --> 00:05:13,640 Speaker 1: thought about that so much. Always laughed to myself because 89 00:05:13,640 --> 00:05:18,159 Speaker 1: I thought, I thought, what if my answer was I'm 90 00:05:18,160 --> 00:05:22,200 Speaker 1: not that busy. Because if it is, what you're communicating 91 00:05:22,279 --> 00:05:26,080 Speaker 1: is work is not going good. Things are not going 92 00:05:26,120 --> 00:05:29,400 Speaker 1: well in the music business. That's what that answer would communicate, 93 00:05:29,839 --> 00:05:35,480 Speaker 1: not that busy. So we associate busy with work is 94 00:05:35,520 --> 00:05:39,640 Speaker 1: good because you usually would say something like it's busy, 95 00:05:40,160 --> 00:05:43,760 Speaker 1: you know, but it's good. But man, just crazy right now? Crazy, 96 00:05:44,040 --> 00:05:46,080 Speaker 1: And then you'd say, yeah, but us too, Man, how 97 00:05:46,120 --> 00:05:49,120 Speaker 1: about you guys? Us to say, where'd you guys come from? Dude, 98 00:05:49,120 --> 00:05:53,000 Speaker 1: I don't even remember Detroit? Maybe how about you Springfield? 99 00:05:53,240 --> 00:05:58,719 Speaker 1: I think, yeah, oh, crazy, crazy, busy. So it's just 100 00:05:58,800 --> 00:06:01,640 Speaker 1: like this badge of honor. Maybe this is an American thing. 101 00:06:01,640 --> 00:06:03,880 Speaker 1: I don't think I've talked to too many people worldwide 102 00:06:03,880 --> 00:06:07,159 Speaker 1: about this, but I feel like it's probably an American thing. 103 00:06:07,720 --> 00:06:10,920 Speaker 1: We just take so much pride in being busy and 104 00:06:12,000 --> 00:06:15,359 Speaker 1: there's almost no way out of it. In fact, you 105 00:06:15,400 --> 00:06:18,760 Speaker 1: have to really fight to find space, and if you 106 00:06:18,800 --> 00:06:21,680 Speaker 1: do find space, you're gonna fill it with something like 107 00:06:22,400 --> 00:06:26,120 Speaker 1: James says here with if you have time. For instance, 108 00:06:26,160 --> 00:06:28,520 Speaker 1: this is what James is thinking, putting words in his mouth. 109 00:06:28,880 --> 00:06:31,720 Speaker 1: He's thinking that I have extra time, I should coach 110 00:06:31,760 --> 00:06:35,599 Speaker 1: my son's little league team, and then there goes the time. 111 00:06:37,440 --> 00:06:39,760 Speaker 1: And then if you have a little time because you're 112 00:06:39,800 --> 00:06:42,479 Speaker 1: not coaching, you say, hey, we should start this small 113 00:06:42,520 --> 00:06:47,440 Speaker 1: business thing, and then there goes that time. So, like 114 00:06:47,480 --> 00:06:49,799 Speaker 1: he says, I'm constantly running from one thing to the next, 115 00:06:49,839 --> 00:06:54,440 Speaker 1: and I don't have time to breathe. He's James coming 116 00:06:54,440 --> 00:06:58,279 Speaker 1: out of the tour bus looking for coffee, saying busy. 117 00:06:59,320 --> 00:07:01,960 Speaker 1: And he's not necessairly complaining. But that's why. I mean, 118 00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:05,239 Speaker 1: everyone's listening right now going yeah, I got it, especially 119 00:07:05,279 --> 00:07:07,120 Speaker 1: this time of year. If you're listening to this podcast 120 00:07:07,160 --> 00:07:10,320 Speaker 1: in real time, it is December, and this time of year, 121 00:07:10,680 --> 00:07:15,760 Speaker 1: everyone is just busy. In fact, dear brother of mine, 122 00:07:15,400 --> 00:07:21,440 Speaker 1: his son has a piano recital tonight and he's been 123 00:07:21,520 --> 00:07:23,560 Speaker 1: asking me to go, and I'm like, I really want 124 00:07:23,600 --> 00:07:26,960 Speaker 1: to go, because especially if he asked me multiple times, 125 00:07:26,960 --> 00:07:29,960 Speaker 1: I know it's important to him. And so it's that therefore, 126 00:07:30,080 --> 00:07:34,360 Speaker 1: it's important to me to be there. And yet Lincoln 127 00:07:34,400 --> 00:07:40,600 Speaker 1: has a basketball game tonight, and so I'm texting him like, Hey, 128 00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:43,800 Speaker 1: if we go to this basketball game and still make it, 129 00:07:43,800 --> 00:07:46,000 Speaker 1: can we make it to your house at eight even 130 00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:49,080 Speaker 1: though the recital starts at seven fifteen? Would anyone still 131 00:07:49,080 --> 00:07:54,160 Speaker 1: be there? And he replies and goes, bro, I understand 132 00:07:54,360 --> 00:07:59,200 Speaker 1: everyone's busy this time of year, and he knows it's 133 00:07:59,200 --> 00:08:02,280 Speaker 1: not just this time of year, it's all the time. 134 00:08:03,160 --> 00:08:07,000 Speaker 1: That's what we do. So the question from James is 135 00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:10,920 Speaker 1: how do you balance work, family, and personal time without 136 00:08:10,920 --> 00:08:13,880 Speaker 1: feeling like you're always dropping the ball. It's actually interesting 137 00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:17,840 Speaker 1: that he uses that analogy. I've heard it said before 138 00:08:18,040 --> 00:08:23,160 Speaker 1: like this, that life and managing time could be looked 139 00:08:23,160 --> 00:08:29,880 Speaker 1: at as juggling. So you're juggling these balls, right, But 140 00:08:29,920 --> 00:08:32,760 Speaker 1: what we have to understand is that there has to 141 00:08:32,800 --> 00:08:37,920 Speaker 1: be priority in the balls that we're juggling. So in 142 00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:41,160 Speaker 1: order to establish that priority, think of that. Think of 143 00:08:41,200 --> 00:08:45,280 Speaker 1: these juggling balls as some of them are rubber and 144 00:08:45,720 --> 00:08:49,720 Speaker 1: some of them are glass. You don't want to drop 145 00:08:49,880 --> 00:08:54,680 Speaker 1: the glass ones the rubber ones. It's okay, it's okay. 146 00:08:54,720 --> 00:09:00,360 Speaker 1: To drop them, they will bounce, nothing breaks. It's okay. 147 00:09:01,559 --> 00:09:05,760 Speaker 1: For instance, this piano recital, my friend's piano recital. Although 148 00:09:05,800 --> 00:09:09,720 Speaker 1: it's important, it's a rubber ball that if I drop it, 149 00:09:09,720 --> 00:09:12,560 Speaker 1: it's going to bounce. He's not going to get his 150 00:09:12,600 --> 00:09:15,120 Speaker 1: feelings hurt and we're going to be okay as a family. 151 00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:18,120 Speaker 1: That doesn't mean it's not important. You know why it's 152 00:09:18,160 --> 00:09:22,080 Speaker 1: important because I'm juggling it. It's in the balls that 153 00:09:22,080 --> 00:09:25,160 Speaker 1: I'm juggling. If it wasn't important, if it didn't matter 154 00:09:25,200 --> 00:09:27,920 Speaker 1: to me, it wouldn't be in the five or six 155 00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:31,760 Speaker 1: things that I'm thinking about doing today tonight as I 156 00:09:31,840 --> 00:09:34,880 Speaker 1: record this podcast right now, there's five or six things 157 00:09:34,920 --> 00:09:40,480 Speaker 1: I need to get done today tonight, so that that 158 00:09:40,640 --> 00:09:43,520 Speaker 1: includes the rubber balls that are still important. Don't get 159 00:09:43,520 --> 00:09:46,800 Speaker 1: me wrong. It's it's important. It's important to him, and 160 00:09:46,840 --> 00:09:49,400 Speaker 1: it's important to me that we come to his son's 161 00:09:49,480 --> 00:09:55,040 Speaker 1: piano recital because I'm his brother and he's my brother 162 00:09:55,080 --> 00:10:01,760 Speaker 1: in Christ, he's a member at our church. So differentiating 163 00:10:02,120 --> 00:10:05,240 Speaker 1: the glass balls and the rubber ones, that's what you 164 00:10:05,320 --> 00:10:13,520 Speaker 1: got to do. So making sure that if my daughter 165 00:10:14,400 --> 00:10:16,640 Speaker 1: is going through something and she's not right now by 166 00:10:16,640 --> 00:10:19,800 Speaker 1: the way, but if she was going through some kind 167 00:10:19,840 --> 00:10:27,520 Speaker 1: of drama at school, there's something happened or something happened 168 00:10:27,520 --> 00:10:31,960 Speaker 1: in her friend group and it really hurt her spirit 169 00:10:33,400 --> 00:10:37,400 Speaker 1: and she needs her dad. That is a ball that 170 00:10:37,400 --> 00:10:41,160 Speaker 1: I'm juggling, that is glass. If I trade that glass 171 00:10:41,200 --> 00:10:45,040 Speaker 1: one for a rubber one and say the rubber one 172 00:10:45,160 --> 00:10:52,480 Speaker 1: is a friend is having to get together for a 173 00:10:52,559 --> 00:10:56,760 Speaker 1: Christmas party at his house, This is hypothetical, and it's 174 00:10:56,800 --> 00:10:59,480 Speaker 1: about a thirty minute drive and there's a lot of 175 00:10:59,480 --> 00:11:02,240 Speaker 1: people going and it'd be kind of fun. But it's 176 00:11:02,240 --> 00:11:06,040 Speaker 1: a rubber ball. The glass one is London who's having 177 00:11:06,040 --> 00:11:10,920 Speaker 1: the problem. I cannot drop that one that hurts the family, 178 00:11:10,960 --> 00:11:14,920 Speaker 1: that could actually do damage dropping the rubber one that bounces. 179 00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:16,920 Speaker 1: It's fine. No one thinks about it. We need to 180 00:11:16,920 --> 00:11:19,640 Speaker 1: know the difference when we're juggling, and once again, everything 181 00:11:19,679 --> 00:11:25,079 Speaker 1: we're juggling is important. So I can't answer for you specifically, James, 182 00:11:25,120 --> 00:11:28,160 Speaker 1: but you get the full time job, you're coaching your 183 00:11:28,160 --> 00:11:30,320 Speaker 1: son's little league, your wife and I are trying to 184 00:11:30,320 --> 00:11:34,120 Speaker 1: start a small business on the side. It's up to 185 00:11:34,160 --> 00:11:37,200 Speaker 1: you to figure out what is glass and what is rubber. 186 00:11:38,280 --> 00:11:43,920 Speaker 1: And I'm assuming that the full time job is what 187 00:11:44,280 --> 00:11:46,760 Speaker 1: is supporting everything else in this little circle right here. 188 00:11:47,720 --> 00:11:50,920 Speaker 1: So because of the full time job, your son needs 189 00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:53,080 Speaker 1: to play in a little league team and you get 190 00:11:53,080 --> 00:11:55,960 Speaker 1: to coach him. Because of the full time job, you 191 00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:59,080 Speaker 1: get to take time to start this small business with 192 00:11:59,120 --> 00:12:02,480 Speaker 1: your wife. If you take the small time, the small 193 00:12:02,720 --> 00:12:06,599 Speaker 1: the full time job out of the juggling, all the 194 00:12:06,640 --> 00:12:11,400 Speaker 1: other balls drop, regardless of rubber or glass. So recognize 195 00:12:11,400 --> 00:12:14,920 Speaker 1: that too. Recognize that if there's seven balls you're juggling, 196 00:12:15,440 --> 00:12:17,400 Speaker 1: which one of those, If you took it out, all 197 00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:22,160 Speaker 1: the balls drop. That's an important thing. So these are 198 00:12:22,160 --> 00:12:24,400 Speaker 1: things that you're gonna have to figure out, and you're 199 00:12:24,440 --> 00:12:26,800 Speaker 1: gonna have to figure out what gives How do you 200 00:12:26,840 --> 00:12:30,400 Speaker 1: balance work, family, personal time without feeling like you're always 201 00:12:30,840 --> 00:12:34,880 Speaker 1: dropping a ball? Recognize if you did drop a ball, 202 00:12:34,960 --> 00:12:37,480 Speaker 1: if more of them drop, and then recognize if you 203 00:12:37,520 --> 00:12:39,920 Speaker 1: drop this one and it's rubber, all the other ones 204 00:12:40,040 --> 00:12:44,839 Speaker 1: that keep on juggling and nothing changes. Start to recognize those, right, 205 00:12:44,920 --> 00:12:49,760 Speaker 1: So think through these things. Thankfully you didn't give me 206 00:12:49,760 --> 00:12:52,440 Speaker 1: a scenario like I'm trying to work through a full 207 00:12:52,480 --> 00:12:56,720 Speaker 1: time job and a small business and sharing a family 208 00:12:56,880 --> 00:13:00,000 Speaker 1: meal together, or attending church together. You're like, you didn't 209 00:13:00,120 --> 00:13:03,079 Speaker 1: give me that, or I would go, man, you gotta 210 00:13:03,160 --> 00:13:05,680 Speaker 1: you gotta find a way to have these family meals together. 211 00:13:07,320 --> 00:13:09,720 Speaker 1: If it's starting the small business interferes with that every 212 00:13:09,720 --> 00:13:12,360 Speaker 1: single time, then you have to push that to the side. 213 00:13:12,800 --> 00:13:14,160 Speaker 1: You have to kick that can down the road a 214 00:13:14,200 --> 00:13:18,920 Speaker 1: little bit. On the son's little league team. This is 215 00:13:19,040 --> 00:13:21,599 Speaker 1: this is something we all of us need to constantly 216 00:13:21,640 --> 00:13:26,439 Speaker 1: be thinking through kid's hobbies because most people that are 217 00:13:26,440 --> 00:13:29,240 Speaker 1: my age are older can think back and go, man, 218 00:13:29,280 --> 00:13:32,400 Speaker 1: I had some hobbies as a kid, but if I did, 219 00:13:33,679 --> 00:13:36,280 Speaker 1: mom and dad just dropped me off and said pick 220 00:13:36,320 --> 00:13:40,880 Speaker 1: you up at seven. You know, it's not like that. Today. Today, 221 00:13:41,000 --> 00:13:45,320 Speaker 1: our kids, our kids hobbies become the adults hobbies. And 222 00:13:45,360 --> 00:13:48,840 Speaker 1: it's never been like that in history. The kid's hobbies 223 00:13:49,120 --> 00:13:52,959 Speaker 1: have never been also the adult hobbies. Meaning whatever the 224 00:13:53,040 --> 00:13:56,600 Speaker 1: kid's doing, the parents are now suddenly that's that, that's 225 00:13:56,640 --> 00:14:00,760 Speaker 1: their whole world. Notice I didn't say that we shouldn't 226 00:14:00,760 --> 00:14:02,720 Speaker 1: care about our kids, or love what our kids love, 227 00:14:02,840 --> 00:14:05,839 Speaker 1: or be involved. I don't mean that. I just mean 228 00:14:05,880 --> 00:14:11,920 Speaker 1: I remember when I had a little league team, Dad 229 00:14:11,920 --> 00:14:14,120 Speaker 1: would just pick me up when it was, and so 230 00:14:14,200 --> 00:14:15,679 Speaker 1: were all the other All the other boys would just 231 00:14:15,720 --> 00:14:17,439 Speaker 1: get picked up when it was time to get picked up. 232 00:14:18,720 --> 00:14:24,960 Speaker 1: So sometimes, to finish this whole thought, sometimes we have 233 00:14:25,080 --> 00:14:29,640 Speaker 1: to learn how to say no, because, like aunt Man 234 00:14:29,680 --> 00:14:33,680 Speaker 1: said on this podcast several months ago, every time you 235 00:14:33,720 --> 00:14:38,600 Speaker 1: say yes to something, you are always saying no to 236 00:14:38,680 --> 00:14:42,920 Speaker 1: something else. Learn how to say no from the beginning. 237 00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:50,800 Speaker 1: Next question comes from anonymous. Hey Granger, I'm eighteen, still 238 00:14:50,800 --> 00:14:53,640 Speaker 1: in high school. I'm a Christian. What are your thoughts 239 00:14:53,680 --> 00:14:58,280 Speaker 1: on dating someone from a different religion? I am currently 240 00:14:58,320 --> 00:15:02,440 Speaker 1: a little bit puzzled on this. You have a great day, 241 00:15:02,920 --> 00:15:10,440 Speaker 1: all right, Anonymous, thanks for the question, buddy, your thoughts. 242 00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:14,840 Speaker 1: He's asking my thoughts on dating someone from a different religion. 243 00:15:17,360 --> 00:15:20,600 Speaker 1: I would first, I would say, if you weren't asking me, 244 00:15:20,640 --> 00:15:23,200 Speaker 1: if you're just asking in general, I would say that 245 00:15:23,640 --> 00:15:30,000 Speaker 1: wholly depends on what your idea of religion is, right, 246 00:15:30,720 --> 00:15:37,960 Speaker 1: Because if if your idea of religion is an NFL 247 00:15:38,080 --> 00:15:41,240 Speaker 1: team that you just really you're really into it, and 248 00:15:42,120 --> 00:15:45,440 Speaker 1: you're thinking about dating a girl that loves the New 249 00:15:45,520 --> 00:15:49,520 Speaker 1: York Giants and you love the Dallas Cowboys, I would 250 00:15:49,560 --> 00:15:51,640 Speaker 1: say you're gonna be okay. You're gonna have a lot 251 00:15:51,640 --> 00:15:54,280 Speaker 1: of rivalry in your family, but you're gonna be okay. 252 00:15:55,200 --> 00:15:57,320 Speaker 1: But if you're asking me and my thoughts on what 253 00:15:57,560 --> 00:15:59,800 Speaker 1: I know you're talking about, and you're talking about Christianity 254 00:15:59,880 --> 00:16:04,960 Speaker 1: versus then I would say the unpopular answer then that 255 00:16:05,080 --> 00:16:11,160 Speaker 1: is it would be absolutely devastating if you were a 256 00:16:11,240 --> 00:16:20,120 Speaker 1: Christian and believed in the Bible, then it would be 257 00:16:20,640 --> 00:16:28,920 Speaker 1: absolutely incompatible to be married to someone that didn't believe that. 258 00:16:29,560 --> 00:16:34,480 Speaker 1: And to date is to be preparing for marriage or 259 00:16:34,600 --> 00:16:39,920 Speaker 1: to be getting ready to marry. You're you're dating to marry. 260 00:16:39,920 --> 00:16:43,640 Speaker 1: You should say that way. You're dating someone so that 261 00:16:43,800 --> 00:16:48,360 Speaker 1: you could find someone to marry. I wouldn't believe or 262 00:16:48,680 --> 00:16:51,280 Speaker 1: advocate for like sport dating or just dating for the 263 00:16:51,280 --> 00:16:54,720 Speaker 1: fun of it, or just dating as a social habit 264 00:16:54,880 --> 00:16:57,800 Speaker 1: or something. I would say you would be dating to 265 00:16:57,880 --> 00:17:01,240 Speaker 1: find a spouse. I think most people would agree with that. 266 00:17:02,520 --> 00:17:05,560 Speaker 1: You would only really date, otherwise you would just be single. 267 00:17:06,320 --> 00:17:08,200 Speaker 1: We wouldn't put up with the hassle of just dating 268 00:17:08,280 --> 00:17:10,439 Speaker 1: knowing that it was always going to be temporary. So 269 00:17:10,480 --> 00:17:16,199 Speaker 1: you're dating for the permanent conclusion of marriage. And if 270 00:17:16,240 --> 00:17:18,680 Speaker 1: that's the case and the person was a different religion 271 00:17:19,119 --> 00:17:22,240 Speaker 1: and you were a Christian, it would be totally incompatible 272 00:17:22,240 --> 00:17:25,439 Speaker 1: with your faith, and it would just make a nightmare 273 00:17:26,160 --> 00:17:30,800 Speaker 1: of problems in the future of I attend church and 274 00:17:30,840 --> 00:17:36,600 Speaker 1: she doesn't, and the kid you know is raised with 275 00:17:36,680 --> 00:17:40,280 Speaker 1: this faith and she doesn't agree, and then eventually he 276 00:17:40,280 --> 00:17:44,480 Speaker 1: wants to get baptized or she doesn't want that. It's 277 00:17:44,520 --> 00:17:47,960 Speaker 1: an endless nightmare, especially when you're talking about kids coming 278 00:17:48,000 --> 00:17:51,800 Speaker 1: into the picture. So I would say, I would say, yeah, 279 00:17:51,840 --> 00:17:56,520 Speaker 1: my thoughts are absolutely not and I would double down 280 00:17:56,520 --> 00:17:58,479 Speaker 1: on what I've said many times on this podcast, and 281 00:17:58,520 --> 00:18:03,280 Speaker 1: that is that this idea we get stuck in our 282 00:18:03,320 --> 00:18:07,520 Speaker 1: heads that there is one person and one person only, 283 00:18:07,600 --> 00:18:11,199 Speaker 1: and that person's our soulmate, and we find them and 284 00:18:11,240 --> 00:18:15,879 Speaker 1: although they have these certain flaws that could be huge problems, 285 00:18:16,640 --> 00:18:21,439 Speaker 1: very incompatible with with a married couple, we say that 286 00:18:21,440 --> 00:18:25,080 Speaker 1: doesn't matter, no flaw matters, because this person's my soulmate. 287 00:18:26,480 --> 00:18:30,160 Speaker 1: And then we we end up with these huge problems 288 00:18:30,880 --> 00:18:34,480 Speaker 1: and the reality is there is no soulmate. This is 289 00:18:34,600 --> 00:18:37,359 Speaker 1: this is kind of just a romantic, made up idea 290 00:18:38,320 --> 00:18:42,840 Speaker 1: when in reality, you find someone that you're you're widely 291 00:18:42,880 --> 00:18:47,720 Speaker 1: attracted to, and you have a healthy amount in common, 292 00:18:47,760 --> 00:18:49,840 Speaker 1: and I would say a healthy amount not in common. 293 00:18:50,359 --> 00:18:53,760 Speaker 1: And you have the fundamentals right, like you worship the 294 00:18:53,760 --> 00:18:58,240 Speaker 1: same God. And then at that point you make a decision, 295 00:18:58,359 --> 00:19:01,119 Speaker 1: you say, I'm gonna I decide that I'm going to 296 00:19:01,160 --> 00:19:04,200 Speaker 1: commit to her, and I'm going to do it forever. 297 00:19:04,359 --> 00:19:06,720 Speaker 1: I'm gonna well, as long as I'm on this earth, 298 00:19:06,720 --> 00:19:08,960 Speaker 1: as long as I'm breathing oxygen, I'm going to commit 299 00:19:09,000 --> 00:19:13,119 Speaker 1: to her. That's that's really what it is. And it 300 00:19:13,640 --> 00:19:20,359 Speaker 1: sounds so old timey and and it sounds kind of 301 00:19:20,400 --> 00:19:23,679 Speaker 1: like a crude system because we believe in this, you know, 302 00:19:23,800 --> 00:19:28,479 Speaker 1: fairy dust soulmate thing, and it's not true. So if 303 00:19:28,520 --> 00:19:31,320 Speaker 1: you find someone that doesn't, that doesn't meet the fundamental 304 00:19:32,800 --> 00:19:36,480 Speaker 1: fundamental characteristics that you need, like worshiping a god that 305 00:19:36,520 --> 00:19:40,320 Speaker 1: you worship, then you would break this idea of soulmate 306 00:19:40,400 --> 00:19:43,760 Speaker 1: and go. Even though I am attracted, I do have 307 00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:46,600 Speaker 1: a lot of things in common, I'm not going to 308 00:19:46,600 --> 00:19:50,320 Speaker 1: pursue this any further. That's it. When you think about 309 00:19:50,359 --> 00:19:54,600 Speaker 1: brands that are doing really well like All Birds Skims, Sure, 310 00:19:54,920 --> 00:19:58,080 Speaker 1: maybe Ye Apparel. 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Go to shopify dot com slash granger to 329 00:20:57,600 --> 00:21:04,159 Speaker 1: upgrade your selling today shopify dot com slash granger. And 330 00:21:04,200 --> 00:21:05,480 Speaker 1: if you want to get a hold of me or 331 00:21:05,520 --> 00:21:07,720 Speaker 1: have me make you a video message from my phone, 332 00:21:07,960 --> 00:21:11,200 Speaker 1: as I always say every podcast, go to cameo dot 333 00:21:11,200 --> 00:21:15,960 Speaker 1: com slash dranger Smith cameo dot com slash granger Smith. 334 00:21:16,000 --> 00:21:19,480 Speaker 1: I will make you a video message custom to however 335 00:21:19,560 --> 00:21:21,439 Speaker 1: you want me to say it. This is great for 336 00:21:21,480 --> 00:21:24,320 Speaker 1: the holiday season. You got someone that you need a 337 00:21:24,359 --> 00:21:26,639 Speaker 1: gift for, or maybe you don't know what to get them, 338 00:21:26,720 --> 00:21:29,680 Speaker 1: or it's just too late, go to cameo dot com 339 00:21:29,720 --> 00:21:32,520 Speaker 1: slash granger Smith and I'll make you a personal video 340 00:21:32,560 --> 00:21:37,080 Speaker 1: message to them, say Merry Christmas or happy Birthday, whatever 341 00:21:37,119 --> 00:21:39,560 Speaker 1: it might be, and a little message from me. It's 342 00:21:39,600 --> 00:21:43,160 Speaker 1: super easy. Go to cameo dot com slash Grangersmith. Okay, 343 00:21:43,200 --> 00:21:45,439 Speaker 1: once again, if you want to email me a question, 344 00:21:45,840 --> 00:21:49,800 Speaker 1: email podcast at grangersmith dot com. A man, We'll take 345 00:21:49,840 --> 00:21:52,840 Speaker 1: your question. Put it into the cue. The next one 346 00:21:53,040 --> 00:21:57,880 Speaker 1: is Melissa, and Melissa asked this. My fourteen year old 347 00:21:57,920 --> 00:22:01,280 Speaker 1: daughter has been really distant lately and I don't know 348 00:22:01,280 --> 00:22:04,000 Speaker 1: how to connect with her. She's moody, spends all of 349 00:22:04,040 --> 00:22:07,120 Speaker 1: her time on her phone. She doesn't want to talk 350 00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:09,840 Speaker 1: to me like she used to. Do you have any 351 00:22:09,880 --> 00:22:12,960 Speaker 1: advice for a parent trying to navigate the teen years. 352 00:22:13,440 --> 00:22:15,959 Speaker 1: I don't want to push her away further, but I 353 00:22:15,960 --> 00:22:18,719 Speaker 1: also don't want to just give up on having a 354 00:22:18,760 --> 00:22:24,639 Speaker 1: relationship with her. Thanks for your insight, Melissa. Hey, thanks Melissa, 355 00:22:24,640 --> 00:22:28,359 Speaker 1: A great question. I think a lot of people could 356 00:22:28,359 --> 00:22:34,439 Speaker 1: be interested in something like this, including myself. Navigating a 357 00:22:34,520 --> 00:22:40,600 Speaker 1: teen is something It requires a lot of thought and 358 00:22:40,640 --> 00:22:43,840 Speaker 1: a lot of effort, and that goes against kind of 359 00:22:43,920 --> 00:22:48,480 Speaker 1: our natural state that we kind of just want things 360 00:22:48,480 --> 00:22:51,640 Speaker 1: to operate without really interfering too much. We want things 361 00:22:51,680 --> 00:22:54,960 Speaker 1: to be easy for us because everything else is hard. 362 00:22:55,000 --> 00:22:57,880 Speaker 1: You know, work is hard, the bills are coming in, 363 00:23:00,000 --> 00:23:05,000 Speaker 1: relationships with everyone else, it's hard. Friendships are hard, relationships 364 00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:07,560 Speaker 1: with our spouse can be hard. All these things weigh 365 00:23:07,600 --> 00:23:10,240 Speaker 1: in on us, and we just think, could our kids 366 00:23:10,320 --> 00:23:13,760 Speaker 1: just be easy? But in fact our kids end up 367 00:23:13,800 --> 00:23:18,159 Speaker 1: being the most difficult thing out of all of these scenarios. 368 00:23:18,840 --> 00:23:22,679 Speaker 1: And so we have a tendency, in my mind, a 369 00:23:22,760 --> 00:23:31,240 Speaker 1: wrong tendency to kind of just pacify our relationship with 370 00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:34,280 Speaker 1: our kids in ways that kind of shuts them up 371 00:23:34,800 --> 00:23:39,760 Speaker 1: and makes it go away with the little ones that 372 00:23:39,840 --> 00:23:44,720 Speaker 1: could be giving them a screen. Okay, you're driving me 373 00:23:44,760 --> 00:23:47,080 Speaker 1: crazy right now. Just let me type in a YouTube 374 00:23:47,119 --> 00:23:49,679 Speaker 1: thing for you and you just watch on loop. You 375 00:23:49,760 --> 00:23:53,480 Speaker 1: just watch YouTube videos endlessly because I know that's probably 376 00:23:53,560 --> 00:23:55,960 Speaker 1: not good for your little brain. But at least you 377 00:23:56,119 --> 00:23:58,680 Speaker 1: just shut up and stop bothering me, because I've got 378 00:23:58,680 --> 00:24:04,399 Speaker 1: all these other things going on, and with a specifically 379 00:24:04,400 --> 00:24:08,679 Speaker 1: a fourteen year old daughter that's not necessarily you typing 380 00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:11,400 Speaker 1: is something in YouTube and letting her go that's more 381 00:24:11,720 --> 00:24:16,119 Speaker 1: more so you just let her do her thing. So 382 00:24:17,280 --> 00:24:19,879 Speaker 1: and once again you're thinking, I don't think this is 383 00:24:19,920 --> 00:24:22,480 Speaker 1: probably not wise of me to just let her do 384 00:24:22,520 --> 00:24:25,680 Speaker 1: whatever she wants to do. But when I just let 385 00:24:25,680 --> 00:24:30,200 Speaker 1: her go, she's quiet, she doesn't need anything, there's no drama. 386 00:24:30,880 --> 00:24:34,000 Speaker 1: I don't hear from her, and I could actually relax 387 00:24:34,080 --> 00:24:35,919 Speaker 1: after a hard day of work, or I don't have 388 00:24:36,000 --> 00:24:40,159 Speaker 1: to think about, you know, finding something for her to do, 389 00:24:40,240 --> 00:24:42,200 Speaker 1: or finding a chore for her to do, or entertaining 390 00:24:42,240 --> 00:24:46,240 Speaker 1: her or cultivating some kind of thing that she needs 391 00:24:46,240 --> 00:24:48,480 Speaker 1: to be working on. Instead, I just let her go. 392 00:24:48,720 --> 00:24:53,240 Speaker 1: So that's kind of a default for parents. The default 393 00:24:53,320 --> 00:24:58,720 Speaker 1: is let the team go. But here's what happens. They disappear, 394 00:24:59,560 --> 00:25:04,239 Speaker 1: they come. Once they become distant, they only become more 395 00:25:04,280 --> 00:25:07,359 Speaker 1: and more distant. They don't on their own, they don't 396 00:25:07,359 --> 00:25:09,720 Speaker 1: become distant and then slowly start coming back in on 397 00:25:09,760 --> 00:25:14,480 Speaker 1: their own and when the distance happens, the connection is lost. 398 00:25:14,840 --> 00:25:18,120 Speaker 1: So that's what Melissa is saying. I don't know how 399 00:25:18,160 --> 00:25:20,440 Speaker 1: to connect with her, and that's a product of the distance, 400 00:25:21,440 --> 00:25:25,239 Speaker 1: and then another product. Then furthermore, she's moody, spends all 401 00:25:25,240 --> 00:25:27,320 Speaker 1: her time on her phone, doesn't want to talk to me. 402 00:25:27,680 --> 00:25:32,160 Speaker 1: So that just continues to grow. So let her go, 403 00:25:32,320 --> 00:25:35,360 Speaker 1: let her do her own thing. The connection's lost. When 404 00:25:35,359 --> 00:25:39,560 Speaker 1: the connection's lost, she doesn't want to talk because it's awkward. 405 00:25:39,560 --> 00:25:43,080 Speaker 1: At that point, there's no more connection, and then it 406 00:25:43,160 --> 00:25:46,359 Speaker 1: kind of spins out of control, and once again the 407 00:25:46,480 --> 00:25:49,040 Speaker 1: easiest part of the pattern for the parent and the team, 408 00:25:49,119 --> 00:25:52,800 Speaker 1: the easiest thing is just let it go. Hopefully she'll 409 00:25:52,840 --> 00:25:54,880 Speaker 1: just come back one day and we'll find some things 410 00:25:54,880 --> 00:25:59,040 Speaker 1: that we don't have anything in common right now. Maybe 411 00:25:59,040 --> 00:26:02,800 Speaker 1: one day will regain some ground, but right now she's 412 00:26:03,200 --> 00:26:08,760 Speaker 1: kind of gone. So you know all this because this 413 00:26:08,840 --> 00:26:14,280 Speaker 1: is what you're living. But you're asking for advice to 414 00:26:14,320 --> 00:26:20,200 Speaker 1: not push her away further, but reconnect and not give 415 00:26:20,280 --> 00:26:24,399 Speaker 1: up on having a relationship. So first of all, this 416 00:26:24,560 --> 00:26:27,320 Speaker 1: kind of goes back to the juggling. The juggling question 417 00:26:27,640 --> 00:26:29,760 Speaker 1: It's interesting how that kind of relates exactly to this 418 00:26:29,840 --> 00:26:33,280 Speaker 1: question with Melissa. This is a glass ball. Your daughter, 419 00:26:33,600 --> 00:26:36,240 Speaker 1: your fourteen year old daughter is a glass ball. You're 420 00:26:36,320 --> 00:26:39,359 Speaker 1: juggling a lot of things, and there's rubber balls and 421 00:26:39,359 --> 00:26:41,879 Speaker 1: glass balls, and she is a glass ball. Do not 422 00:26:42,040 --> 00:26:46,360 Speaker 1: drop her. It shatters and when it shatters, it is 423 00:26:46,640 --> 00:26:51,240 Speaker 1: near impossible to put it back together. So what I've 424 00:26:51,359 --> 00:26:55,160 Speaker 1: learned and what I've seen, not only with our team 425 00:26:55,440 --> 00:26:58,760 Speaker 1: but in talking with other parents, some things have been 426 00:26:58,800 --> 00:27:06,520 Speaker 1: really helpful. Ambernized journey and one of those was sometimes 427 00:27:06,560 --> 00:27:10,040 Speaker 1: we have to recognize when a team kind of disappears 428 00:27:10,040 --> 00:27:14,560 Speaker 1: and becomes distant. Sometimes that just has to do with 429 00:27:14,800 --> 00:27:17,679 Speaker 1: something that's not it's not personal. It just has to 430 00:27:17,680 --> 00:27:22,480 Speaker 1: do with the current rhythm that they're in. And it 431 00:27:22,520 --> 00:27:26,640 Speaker 1: would be the equivalent I guess of if someone came 432 00:27:26,680 --> 00:27:31,399 Speaker 1: to my house every day about First of all, I'm 433 00:27:31,440 --> 00:27:33,680 Speaker 1: an early I'm a morning guy. I'm not an I'm 434 00:27:33,680 --> 00:27:36,000 Speaker 1: not an evening guy. So someone came to my house 435 00:27:36,040 --> 00:27:40,400 Speaker 1: every day about ten thirty PM and they left at eleven, 436 00:27:41,680 --> 00:27:45,480 Speaker 1: they would probably after a couple weeks of seeing me, 437 00:27:45,640 --> 00:27:48,840 Speaker 1: they would be like, man Granger is just I don't know. 438 00:27:48,880 --> 00:27:51,720 Speaker 1: He seems kind of off. He seems kind of distant. 439 00:27:51,760 --> 00:27:56,239 Speaker 1: He seems kind of quick with his answers. He's not 440 00:27:56,400 --> 00:28:00,760 Speaker 1: he doesn't seem as compassionate. I don't know if I 441 00:28:00,800 --> 00:28:03,480 Speaker 1: don't know if he's eating very much. I haven't seen 442 00:28:03,560 --> 00:28:06,760 Speaker 1: him eat. He seems tired. I don't think he's getting 443 00:28:06,800 --> 00:28:10,720 Speaker 1: enough sleep. And if you think about it, how silly 444 00:28:10,800 --> 00:28:13,720 Speaker 1: that is. The reality is, that's just the end of 445 00:28:13,760 --> 00:28:16,760 Speaker 1: my day. You know, ten thirty to eleven, I don't 446 00:28:16,800 --> 00:28:20,159 Speaker 1: function very well. I'm just barely getting by, And so 447 00:28:20,200 --> 00:28:21,960 Speaker 1: you would make that assumption if that's all you saw. 448 00:28:22,040 --> 00:28:26,720 Speaker 1: So sometimes that's what's happening with the teen they're just 449 00:28:26,760 --> 00:28:33,520 Speaker 1: on a different rhythm. A good friend of ours had 450 00:28:33,560 --> 00:28:36,720 Speaker 1: a great solution to this, and she said, with her 451 00:28:36,840 --> 00:28:41,560 Speaker 1: teen son, she said, he seemed distant, he seemed to 452 00:28:41,600 --> 00:28:44,200 Speaker 1: be kind of in his own world, and we were 453 00:28:44,320 --> 00:28:52,040 Speaker 1: losing connection. He wasn't eating, and I missed the conversations 454 00:28:52,040 --> 00:28:56,280 Speaker 1: that I had when he was a little boy. Even ten, eleven, 455 00:28:56,400 --> 00:28:59,640 Speaker 1: twelve years old is so different in the conversations you 456 00:28:59,680 --> 00:29:03,720 Speaker 1: could have with a thirteen, fourteen, fifteen year old like 457 00:29:03,760 --> 00:29:07,320 Speaker 1: a different planet. But what she realized was he was 458 00:29:07,360 --> 00:29:11,000 Speaker 1: on a different rhythm, and so she had to make 459 00:29:11,000 --> 00:29:15,560 Speaker 1: an effort to change her rhythm. So she started staying 460 00:29:15,600 --> 00:29:19,400 Speaker 1: up later, even though she didn't want to and it 461 00:29:19,440 --> 00:29:22,239 Speaker 1: didn't work well with her schedule. In order to not 462 00:29:22,360 --> 00:29:26,080 Speaker 1: drop the glass ball, she started staying up later with 463 00:29:26,240 --> 00:29:30,719 Speaker 1: him and noticing that he would come alive about ten 464 00:29:30,880 --> 00:29:34,560 Speaker 1: thirty at night, eleven o'clock at night, when she was 465 00:29:34,720 --> 00:29:38,000 Speaker 1: just exhausted. That's when he would start to come to life. 466 00:29:38,000 --> 00:29:40,840 Speaker 1: That's when he would have conversations. That's when he would 467 00:29:40,840 --> 00:29:43,360 Speaker 1: open up. That's when he would talk about his day, 468 00:29:43,800 --> 00:29:47,080 Speaker 1: talk about his relationships, the friends he had, the girls 469 00:29:47,200 --> 00:29:49,760 Speaker 1: he might have been interested in. And then she learned 470 00:29:50,000 --> 00:29:52,760 Speaker 1: she could cook him a meal at eleven o'clock at night, 471 00:29:53,320 --> 00:29:57,400 Speaker 1: which sounds crazy, but she learned that because of the rhythm, 472 00:29:57,480 --> 00:30:01,280 Speaker 1: the difference in the rhythm, that she could like make 473 00:30:01,360 --> 00:30:06,520 Speaker 1: him a grilled cheese sandwich and come in there with 474 00:30:06,640 --> 00:30:10,200 Speaker 1: him and they would sit together and have these discussions 475 00:30:10,240 --> 00:30:13,480 Speaker 1: and he would eat the grill cheese sandwich, and because 476 00:30:13,480 --> 00:30:17,959 Speaker 1: of that, the connection came back and it started to grow, 477 00:30:18,680 --> 00:30:22,760 Speaker 1: and the distance started to close. She just recognized he 478 00:30:22,840 --> 00:30:25,200 Speaker 1: was just going through a season obviously a short season. 479 00:30:25,320 --> 00:30:28,600 Speaker 1: People don't. Teens are different. They're different creatures, you know, 480 00:30:28,680 --> 00:30:31,880 Speaker 1: and they don't stay like that forever. They will eventually 481 00:30:31,880 --> 00:30:34,840 Speaker 1: go back to a normal rhythm. But she realized and 482 00:30:34,920 --> 00:30:37,920 Speaker 1: I see the same thing with London, and I have 483 00:30:38,000 --> 00:30:42,440 Speaker 1: to fight that because she comes home from school and 484 00:30:42,800 --> 00:30:46,040 Speaker 1: she has her her routine, you know, sure she's got 485 00:30:46,040 --> 00:30:50,040 Speaker 1: her homework routine and the things that she that she 486 00:30:50,080 --> 00:30:52,680 Speaker 1: needs to get done. She does the chores around around 487 00:30:52,680 --> 00:30:56,320 Speaker 1: a little farm here, and she kind of she doesn't 488 00:30:56,360 --> 00:30:59,600 Speaker 1: eat a lot of dinner, and she might have some 489 00:30:59,720 --> 00:31:03,280 Speaker 1: kind of you know, volleyball or something. And then at 490 00:31:03,280 --> 00:31:06,840 Speaker 1: about nine o'clock, I'm like wrapping up the day. I'm 491 00:31:06,920 --> 00:31:09,880 Speaker 1: by nine o'clock, I'm wrapping up my day. I'm I'm 492 00:31:10,840 --> 00:31:13,640 Speaker 1: I'm getting ready to get rid of the kids. And 493 00:31:13,680 --> 00:31:17,760 Speaker 1: this is me and Ambers time. But now this is 494 00:31:17,800 --> 00:31:21,520 Speaker 1: when London is like coming alive. So she goes in 495 00:31:21,600 --> 00:31:24,440 Speaker 1: her room and she does her reading, or she likes 496 00:31:24,440 --> 00:31:27,000 Speaker 1: to take a long bath. I mean, I don't know 497 00:31:27,000 --> 00:31:29,000 Speaker 1: how she where she gets that from, but she'll take 498 00:31:29,040 --> 00:31:32,160 Speaker 1: an hour long bath and just sitting there like listen 499 00:31:32,200 --> 00:31:37,120 Speaker 1: to a podcast, and she's alive. At ten o'clock at night, 500 00:31:38,040 --> 00:31:41,320 Speaker 1: and I've noticed that if I go, then, if I 501 00:31:41,360 --> 00:31:45,920 Speaker 1: pursue her, then during this time she'll tell me every 502 00:31:45,960 --> 00:31:48,520 Speaker 1: She'll me, she'll talk about her whole day. She'll she'll 503 00:31:48,600 --> 00:31:50,840 Speaker 1: unpack all the problems of the world, and she'll tell 504 00:31:50,920 --> 00:31:53,680 Speaker 1: me the things she's interested in, and the things she likes, 505 00:31:53,680 --> 00:31:56,720 Speaker 1: and the things she wants in her future, the hobbies 506 00:31:56,760 --> 00:31:59,240 Speaker 1: that she's into, or the problem she's having with a 507 00:31:59,360 --> 00:32:03,080 Speaker 1: friend at school, or all these things. And I get 508 00:32:03,160 --> 00:32:07,200 Speaker 1: she comes alive then, and I'm thinking, my flash is saying, 509 00:32:07,240 --> 00:32:09,040 Speaker 1: I'm so tired, I just want to go to bed, 510 00:32:09,120 --> 00:32:13,719 Speaker 1: you know. But I'm also learning, especially with her, that 511 00:32:14,520 --> 00:32:17,040 Speaker 1: I'm not going to fix her problems at ten o'clock 512 00:32:17,080 --> 00:32:20,320 Speaker 1: at night, and she doesn't want me to. Instead, she 513 00:32:20,400 --> 00:32:22,400 Speaker 1: wants me to just listen. There was this moment I 514 00:32:22,440 --> 00:32:26,960 Speaker 1: had with London a while back, six months ago or so, 515 00:32:28,400 --> 00:32:31,960 Speaker 1: and she was having this issue with a friend, this 516 00:32:32,080 --> 00:32:37,240 Speaker 1: drama with a friend, and I'm telling her, I said, well, 517 00:32:37,600 --> 00:32:41,680 Speaker 1: let's don't be friends with her anymore. She's like, no, Daddy, 518 00:32:42,840 --> 00:32:45,480 Speaker 1: and I'm like, we'll avoid her at school. No, that's 519 00:32:45,560 --> 00:32:48,480 Speaker 1: not I'm like, okay, then let's call her right now, 520 00:32:48,520 --> 00:32:50,360 Speaker 1: let's try to reconcile some of these problems. No, I 521 00:32:50,400 --> 00:32:54,520 Speaker 1: don't want to do that. So I learned she doesn't 522 00:32:54,560 --> 00:32:56,640 Speaker 1: want me to fix it. She doesn't want me to 523 00:32:56,640 --> 00:33:01,280 Speaker 1: give her a suggestion on how this gets resolved. She 524 00:33:01,440 --> 00:33:04,959 Speaker 1: just wants me to listen to her. So I kind 525 00:33:04,960 --> 00:33:07,600 Speaker 1: of got into this pattern with her starting that night, 526 00:33:07,640 --> 00:33:11,600 Speaker 1: and I think I really unlocked something, but I instead 527 00:33:11,640 --> 00:33:13,960 Speaker 1: I just laid there and you know, right next to 528 00:33:14,000 --> 00:33:17,400 Speaker 1: her on the couch, and I was like, how does 529 00:33:17,440 --> 00:33:19,640 Speaker 1: that make you feel? And she'd be like, it makes 530 00:33:19,680 --> 00:33:22,000 Speaker 1: me feel terrible, and you know, all this stuff. She 531 00:33:22,040 --> 00:33:25,440 Speaker 1: would unpack this stuff and I would say, it's got 532 00:33:25,440 --> 00:33:28,120 Speaker 1: to be really tough. She would say, yes, it is. 533 00:33:28,640 --> 00:33:31,040 Speaker 1: It is really tough because I'm dealing with this and 534 00:33:31,080 --> 00:33:33,440 Speaker 1: I'm trying to figure out this. And then I would 535 00:33:33,480 --> 00:33:38,200 Speaker 1: say tell me more, and she said, well, there is 536 00:33:38,280 --> 00:33:40,160 Speaker 1: there is something else and blah blah blah. And I 537 00:33:40,200 --> 00:33:43,040 Speaker 1: would say, how does that make you feel? So I 538 00:33:43,080 --> 00:33:45,840 Speaker 1: just kind of repeated those the little mantra, how does 539 00:33:45,880 --> 00:33:48,760 Speaker 1: that make you feel? That's got to be tough, tell 540 00:33:48,760 --> 00:33:51,760 Speaker 1: me more in whatever order. I would say those three things, 541 00:33:52,240 --> 00:33:56,080 Speaker 1: and somehow we got this connection and the next day 542 00:33:56,400 --> 00:33:58,600 Speaker 1: she was like, Daddy, thanks for last night. That was 543 00:33:59,360 --> 00:34:02,760 Speaker 1: I really feel a lot better about everything. And I'm thinking, 544 00:34:02,800 --> 00:34:05,400 Speaker 1: in my mind, I'm thinking I didn't do anything, we 545 00:34:05,440 --> 00:34:08,960 Speaker 1: didn't fix anything, nothing's resolved. But in her mind, that's 546 00:34:08,960 --> 00:34:11,680 Speaker 1: what she wanted. She just wanted to talk it through. 547 00:34:12,000 --> 00:34:15,360 Speaker 1: That's something that literally in my mind as I was 548 00:34:15,400 --> 00:34:18,240 Speaker 1: on the couch and I was saying these things, I'm 549 00:34:18,520 --> 00:34:21,840 Speaker 1: I'm thinking, I'm so tired right now, and in my mind, 550 00:34:21,880 --> 00:34:27,000 Speaker 1: I'm thinking I don't care about this petty problem, and 551 00:34:27,120 --> 00:34:31,400 Speaker 1: what a what a horrible thing for me to think. Now, 552 00:34:31,400 --> 00:34:33,520 Speaker 1: I'm not going to not deny that that was happening 553 00:34:33,520 --> 00:34:35,919 Speaker 1: to me. I was thinking, I'm tired, I don't care. 554 00:34:36,040 --> 00:34:38,600 Speaker 1: This is the stupid problem. We could solve it with 555 00:34:38,960 --> 00:34:43,759 Speaker 1: one phone call or just avoid this person. Well, that's 556 00:34:44,040 --> 00:34:46,440 Speaker 1: that wouldn't be a good father, and that's not what 557 00:34:46,480 --> 00:34:48,920 Speaker 1: she wanted, and that wouldn't have been helpful. So I 558 00:34:48,960 --> 00:34:50,719 Speaker 1: have to I have to deny that part of me. 559 00:34:52,360 --> 00:34:54,440 Speaker 1: I say, I have to put that part of me 560 00:34:54,719 --> 00:34:58,440 Speaker 1: to rest and go out of my comfort zone in 561 00:34:58,560 --> 00:35:02,200 Speaker 1: order to pursue her. So Melissa, that's I don't know 562 00:35:02,239 --> 00:35:05,319 Speaker 1: what you can get out of that. But you have 563 00:35:05,440 --> 00:35:10,480 Speaker 1: to be creative. You have to deny your own sensibilities 564 00:35:11,080 --> 00:35:14,239 Speaker 1: and go out of your comfort zone to bring her 565 00:35:14,400 --> 00:35:17,840 Speaker 1: back in, and that connection will come back and the 566 00:35:17,920 --> 00:35:26,200 Speaker 1: distance will close. Let's go to another question. Another anonymous 567 00:35:26,239 --> 00:35:30,239 Speaker 1: actually says, Hey, Granger, I prefer to stay anonymous. I've 568 00:35:30,239 --> 00:35:31,880 Speaker 1: been listening for a couple of years now, and I 569 00:35:31,880 --> 00:35:34,520 Speaker 1: always look forward to hearing your perspective and your advice. 570 00:35:35,880 --> 00:35:38,400 Speaker 1: I'm seeking advice now on how to handle a family 571 00:35:38,400 --> 00:35:41,400 Speaker 1: member who is short and quick to anger with my 572 00:35:42,320 --> 00:35:47,520 Speaker 1: very young children. They are an in law, quote with 573 00:35:47,560 --> 00:35:51,880 Speaker 1: no blood relation to my husband or me. They state 574 00:35:51,880 --> 00:35:55,960 Speaker 1: that they are a believer. They are generally irritable and 575 00:35:56,040 --> 00:35:59,560 Speaker 1: quick to anger if things don't go according to their plan. 576 00:36:00,480 --> 00:36:03,720 Speaker 1: I feel as though I should confront their behavior, especially 577 00:36:03,719 --> 00:36:06,319 Speaker 1: in regards to my children, but honestly, I don't know 578 00:36:06,360 --> 00:36:09,480 Speaker 1: how to do so lovingly. I know it's better to 579 00:36:09,520 --> 00:36:11,920 Speaker 1: suffer for doing what is right than to suffer for 580 00:36:12,000 --> 00:36:15,720 Speaker 1: what is wrong. But I'm seeking advice on how Thanks 581 00:36:16,120 --> 00:36:19,480 Speaker 1: all right, Anonymous, A good question, and thank you so 582 00:36:19,560 --> 00:36:25,040 Speaker 1: much for opening up with this. Here's what's interesting. I 583 00:36:25,120 --> 00:36:29,880 Speaker 1: don't want to take anything out of context, especially in 584 00:36:29,880 --> 00:36:32,680 Speaker 1: the Bible, And so I don't want us to think 585 00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:38,279 Speaker 1: that the Bible is saying it's better to suffer for 586 00:36:38,360 --> 00:36:44,239 Speaker 1: what is right and then suffer for doing wrong, and 587 00:36:44,880 --> 00:36:50,240 Speaker 1: that includes watching our children get berated by this family member. 588 00:36:50,480 --> 00:36:52,640 Speaker 1: Like that's not that would be way out of context, 589 00:36:53,200 --> 00:36:56,680 Speaker 1: and that would be way outside of what we should 590 00:36:56,680 --> 00:37:04,799 Speaker 1: be thinking. So I don't know the scenario of what 591 00:37:05,520 --> 00:37:08,239 Speaker 1: short and quick to anger is with your children. Being 592 00:37:08,239 --> 00:37:12,120 Speaker 1: short with your children no problem, but being angry with 593 00:37:12,160 --> 00:37:14,799 Speaker 1: your children, that's an interesting thing. I would want to 594 00:37:14,840 --> 00:37:19,759 Speaker 1: know more about why this family member is angry with 595 00:37:19,800 --> 00:37:23,160 Speaker 1: your children. And maybe that's not what you meant, but 596 00:37:23,280 --> 00:37:25,960 Speaker 1: that's kind of what it sounds like. I'm seeking advice 597 00:37:26,000 --> 00:37:28,240 Speaker 1: on how to handle a family member who was short 598 00:37:28,280 --> 00:37:34,359 Speaker 1: and quick to anger with my very young children, Anonymous says, 599 00:37:35,080 --> 00:37:37,839 Speaker 1: And they're in law with no blood relation. I don't 600 00:37:37,840 --> 00:37:42,239 Speaker 1: think that matters as much no blood relation to your husband. 601 00:37:42,560 --> 00:37:47,360 Speaker 1: If they're in the family by marriage. I know it's difficult, 602 00:37:47,920 --> 00:37:52,120 Speaker 1: but I wouldn't prioritize if they were blood it would 603 00:37:52,120 --> 00:37:54,560 Speaker 1: be different, you know, I wouldn't say that. So I 604 00:37:54,560 --> 00:37:58,680 Speaker 1: think we're kind of okay either way there. And then 605 00:37:58,760 --> 00:38:00,839 Speaker 1: the fact that they say they're a believer. I think 606 00:38:00,880 --> 00:38:05,560 Speaker 1: you mean they're a Christian. I don't think that matters either. 607 00:38:06,440 --> 00:38:08,440 Speaker 1: I get where you're going. You're saying that a Christian 608 00:38:08,520 --> 00:38:13,320 Speaker 1: should have fruit of this by being slow to anger 609 00:38:13,360 --> 00:38:17,680 Speaker 1: and quick to listen. I know you're thinking that, but 610 00:38:17,760 --> 00:38:20,040 Speaker 1: this is probably not a time. Doesn't sound like you 611 00:38:20,080 --> 00:38:22,759 Speaker 1: guys have the kind of a relationship where this is 612 00:38:22,800 --> 00:38:28,239 Speaker 1: something you're going to discuss in detail. So you say 613 00:38:28,239 --> 00:38:31,439 Speaker 1: they are genuinely irritable and quick to anger if things 614 00:38:31,440 --> 00:38:37,560 Speaker 1: don't go according to their plan. All this is fine, 615 00:38:37,600 --> 00:38:41,680 Speaker 1: All this is normal. I would take out the context 616 00:38:41,680 --> 00:38:43,600 Speaker 1: of suffering for doing what's right. I don't think you're 617 00:38:43,640 --> 00:38:46,160 Speaker 1: being persecuted, and that's what that text would mean, that 618 00:38:46,200 --> 00:38:49,480 Speaker 1: you're going to suffer for what's right. And this doesn't 619 00:38:49,480 --> 00:38:52,279 Speaker 1: sound like persecution by any means that we would ever 620 00:38:52,320 --> 00:38:54,800 Speaker 1: know in the life of the church over the years 621 00:38:54,880 --> 00:38:58,360 Speaker 1: or in the world. So I don't want to overdramatize. 622 00:38:58,400 --> 00:39:02,839 Speaker 1: I think we could sometimes over dramatize things by using 623 00:39:02,880 --> 00:39:06,759 Speaker 1: biblical terms and saying things like, you know, I've got 624 00:39:06,760 --> 00:39:10,520 Speaker 1: this family member that's kind of like gets really irritated 625 00:39:10,600 --> 00:39:12,480 Speaker 1: if they don't get their way, but you know, I'm 626 00:39:12,480 --> 00:39:15,560 Speaker 1: just gonna suffer through this because you know, it's better 627 00:39:15,600 --> 00:39:19,600 Speaker 1: to suffer for what is right. It's like, ah, don't 628 00:39:20,040 --> 00:39:23,640 Speaker 1: you're not a martyr, Like you're not like the government's 629 00:39:23,680 --> 00:39:28,919 Speaker 1: not about to chop off your head. So I think 630 00:39:28,960 --> 00:39:32,520 Speaker 1: that really, if we don't mention love in this answer, 631 00:39:32,960 --> 00:39:35,600 Speaker 1: love is at the core of all this, and the 632 00:39:35,640 --> 00:39:40,359 Speaker 1: best thing you can do is love them and the 633 00:39:40,560 --> 00:39:45,520 Speaker 1: action that you're wanting from them, give that to them. 634 00:39:45,719 --> 00:39:51,280 Speaker 1: So if you're wanting someone to be slow to listen 635 00:39:51,360 --> 00:39:54,400 Speaker 1: and or quick to listen and slow to anger, if 636 00:39:54,400 --> 00:39:58,359 Speaker 1: that's what you're wanting, then do that to them. Make 637 00:39:58,400 --> 00:40:01,200 Speaker 1: sure that you're looking at yourself first and acting that 638 00:40:01,280 --> 00:40:05,560 Speaker 1: way towards them, And that might not just change them 639 00:40:05,600 --> 00:40:09,040 Speaker 1: right away, but but it certainly puts you in the 640 00:40:09,120 --> 00:40:13,160 Speaker 1: right heart position so that you're not playing defense, you're 641 00:40:13,160 --> 00:40:17,799 Speaker 1: playing offense here. But what I also want to address is, 642 00:40:17,880 --> 00:40:22,239 Speaker 1: don't it wouldn't be okay if someone was angry with 643 00:40:22,280 --> 00:40:26,440 Speaker 1: your young children and you're just letting it go and 644 00:40:26,480 --> 00:40:29,719 Speaker 1: passing it off as this is. You know, I'm just 645 00:40:29,719 --> 00:40:34,040 Speaker 1: going to suffer for this because they're family. It's totally fine. 646 00:40:34,239 --> 00:40:40,120 Speaker 1: Absolutely fine to be during a time of good terms. 647 00:40:40,160 --> 00:40:42,480 Speaker 1: You know, like you wouldn't want to just like you 648 00:40:42,520 --> 00:40:45,080 Speaker 1: wouldn't want to discipline a child when you're angry. You 649 00:40:45,080 --> 00:40:48,480 Speaker 1: wouldn't want to correct someone when you're you know, you're 650 00:40:48,800 --> 00:40:50,759 Speaker 1: in the heat of the moment. So instead, not in 651 00:40:50,800 --> 00:40:53,440 Speaker 1: the heat of the moment, wait till you have cooled 652 00:40:53,480 --> 00:40:57,240 Speaker 1: your jets. And I think there's nothing wrong with pulling 653 00:40:57,320 --> 00:41:00,680 Speaker 1: this person aside. At some point, you're taking a walk, 654 00:41:00,719 --> 00:41:03,920 Speaker 1: you're you're both sitting in the backyard, You're both you know, 655 00:41:03,960 --> 00:41:08,560 Speaker 1: in a lawn chair watching you know, the sprinklers, and 656 00:41:08,640 --> 00:41:14,759 Speaker 1: you say, you mind if I tell you something? Yeah, yeah, 657 00:41:14,840 --> 00:41:19,600 Speaker 1: what's up? Man? I don't want to. I don't want 658 00:41:19,600 --> 00:41:24,000 Speaker 1: to cause a rift between us. But sometimes I see 659 00:41:24,040 --> 00:41:30,120 Speaker 1: you get angry with my children, and I worry about that, 660 00:41:31,239 --> 00:41:33,239 Speaker 1: not because I think you're gonna do any harm to them, 661 00:41:33,320 --> 00:41:37,680 Speaker 1: but I kind of worry if if that's communicated wrong 662 00:41:37,760 --> 00:41:40,279 Speaker 1: to them. And I want I want them to see 663 00:41:40,320 --> 00:41:42,680 Speaker 1: you as the uncle, uh that they love, that they 664 00:41:42,719 --> 00:41:45,880 Speaker 1: love being around. And sometimes when you're you're you snap 665 00:41:45,920 --> 00:41:48,399 Speaker 1: at them and you're they don't understand. They're just they're 666 00:41:48,520 --> 00:41:53,080 Speaker 1: two and four. They they don't always understand uh you 667 00:41:53,080 --> 00:41:56,480 Speaker 1: you want things a certain way, and so I I 668 00:41:56,520 --> 00:41:58,360 Speaker 1: feel like when you snap at them like that, it 669 00:41:58,440 --> 00:42:00,920 Speaker 1: kind of gives them the wrong impression of the uncle 670 00:42:01,000 --> 00:42:03,960 Speaker 1: that they love. Is there anything I could be doing that? 671 00:42:04,280 --> 00:42:07,040 Speaker 1: Is there is there behavior things with them that that 672 00:42:07,120 --> 00:42:10,200 Speaker 1: I could be working on just to make this a 673 00:42:10,239 --> 00:42:12,720 Speaker 1: little bit better when when we're together as a family. 674 00:42:15,000 --> 00:42:17,799 Speaker 1: I don't think there's if you presented that, especially if 675 00:42:17,840 --> 00:42:19,319 Speaker 1: you said is there anything I could be doing? I 676 00:42:19,320 --> 00:42:22,040 Speaker 1: don't think there's there's much of an argument that they 677 00:42:22,040 --> 00:42:27,040 Speaker 1: could make by saying that they demanding that you discipline 678 00:42:27,040 --> 00:42:30,840 Speaker 1: your your children differently, or I think it's either going 679 00:42:30,920 --> 00:42:32,640 Speaker 1: to go one or two ways. Either gonna go They're 680 00:42:32,680 --> 00:42:35,960 Speaker 1: gonna say, oh, yeah, I'm sorry, I'm just not good 681 00:42:36,000 --> 00:42:38,960 Speaker 1: with children. I'm better with teenagers, or I'm better with adults, 682 00:42:38,960 --> 00:42:44,080 Speaker 1: but I'm not good with young children. It's it irritates me, 683 00:42:44,160 --> 00:42:48,560 Speaker 1: and that's that's on me. I'm sorry, I'm gonna work 684 00:42:48,560 --> 00:42:52,840 Speaker 1: on that. They could go that way, or it could 685 00:42:53,280 --> 00:42:55,480 Speaker 1: it could go the opposite, and they could they could say, look, 686 00:42:55,480 --> 00:42:59,920 Speaker 1: I just I think your kids are are not well mannered, 687 00:43:00,120 --> 00:43:02,520 Speaker 1: or I don't think your kids are disciplined enough, or 688 00:43:02,560 --> 00:43:04,520 Speaker 1: you know, it could go that way too, but either way, 689 00:43:04,520 --> 00:43:06,600 Speaker 1: at least the conversation is now on the table, and 690 00:43:06,680 --> 00:43:08,120 Speaker 1: I promise you they're going to think about it the 691 00:43:08,160 --> 00:43:11,600 Speaker 1: next time and don't answer them in anger. But it 692 00:43:12,120 --> 00:43:14,640 Speaker 1: would be wrong, I think if you didn't at least 693 00:43:14,640 --> 00:43:17,840 Speaker 1: bring it up, especially if they were angry with your children, 694 00:43:19,200 --> 00:43:20,720 Speaker 1: and if they got to the point where they're yelling 695 00:43:20,800 --> 00:43:23,080 Speaker 1: or any or especially if they touched them physically and 696 00:43:23,120 --> 00:43:27,120 Speaker 1: grabbed them, you know, grab their arms or something. By 697 00:43:27,200 --> 00:43:31,520 Speaker 1: all means, at that point you step in and you hey, uncle, 698 00:43:31,560 --> 00:43:35,040 Speaker 1: I love you, but I will discipline the kids. Okay, 699 00:43:35,719 --> 00:43:38,839 Speaker 1: let me let me handle this, and you go back 700 00:43:38,840 --> 00:43:42,680 Speaker 1: to your you know, mahito, and I'll deal with the kids. 701 00:43:43,520 --> 00:43:46,320 Speaker 1: I hope that provides enough of an answer, Anonymous, because 702 00:43:48,000 --> 00:43:50,319 Speaker 1: I don't know enough about the scenario to give you 703 00:43:50,320 --> 00:43:54,040 Speaker 1: any more. But I think the core of the answer 704 00:43:54,840 --> 00:44:00,080 Speaker 1: is love. It's love, in fact, that's the core of this. 705 00:44:00,320 --> 00:44:03,680 Speaker 1: Ending this conclusion, I love you guys. Thanks for emailing, 706 00:44:04,000 --> 00:44:07,040 Speaker 1: and we'll see you next podcast. Thanks for joining me 707 00:44:07,080 --> 00:44:10,320 Speaker 1: on the Grangersmith podcast. I appreciate all of you guys. 708 00:44:10,360 --> 00:44:13,279 Speaker 1: You could help me out by rating this podcast on iTunes. 709 00:44:13,600 --> 00:44:16,640 Speaker 1: If you're on YouTube, subscribe to this channel. Hit that 710 00:44:16,680 --> 00:44:20,080 Speaker 1: little like button and notification spell so that you never 711 00:44:20,239 --> 00:44:23,359 Speaker 1: miss anytime I upload a video. YI