Speaker 1: Hey, everybody, it's Eric from the one you feed back
Speaker 1: with another mini episode. She was depressed, just gotten divorced,
Speaker 1: had a young daughter who she wasn't sure how she
Speaker 1: would feed, and then went on to be rejected by
Speaker 1: twelve publishers. This is J. K. Rowling, the author of
Speaker 1: the Harry Potter books. Before Harry Potter broke out, the
Speaker 1: Beatles famously were rejected. We've all heard the stories about
Speaker 1: it took Edison a thousand times to make the lightbulb,
Speaker 1: you know, a thousand tries that didn't work, and he
Speaker 1: finally made it zen. And the art of motorcycle maintenance
Speaker 1: was rejected a hundred and twenty one times. It took
Speaker 1: me three tries before I achieved my first long term sobriety.
Speaker 1: So these are the sort of stories that we hear
Speaker 1: all the time, and they're usually presented to us in
Speaker 1: the sense of things like keep trying at business, or
Speaker 1: keep submitting your book, or in my case, keep trying
Speaker 1: to get sober, which are all very valuable points, and
Speaker 1: I think we all need reminded of that success doesn't
Speaker 1: often come right at the beginning, that it takes us
Speaker 1: a while to achieve success. But I wanted to talk
Speaker 1: about these ideas in a slightly different way today, and
Speaker 1: I wanted to talk about him in the sense of
Speaker 1: what it takes to change the way our mind works,
Speaker 1: and what it takes to change our emotional makeup and
Speaker 1: how we deal with the world. Because the things that
Speaker 1: we talk about on this show a lot mindfulness and
Speaker 1: meditation and getting some distance from our thoughts and learning
Speaker 1: to question our thoughts and taking action even when we
Speaker 1: don't feel like it. These are all things that take
Speaker 1: a lot of work. And I know, for a period
Speaker 1: of my life, I would try something like this. I
Speaker 1: would hear like, do this thing, question your thoughts. Let's
Speaker 1: let's use that as an example. And so I would
Speaker 1: question my thoughts for a day, and I would still
Speaker 1: have this and crappy thoughts at the end of the day,
Speaker 1: and I would give up. So all of these practices
Speaker 1: that we talk about take a lot of time. We
Speaker 1: have to do them again and again and again. We
Speaker 1: have to have the tenacity, uh, like the author of
Speaker 1: Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance did to submit
Speaker 1: his book a hundred and twenty one times. Apparently, Howard Schultz,
Speaker 1: the founder of Starbucks, was rejected by over two investors.
Speaker 1: So the point is, these things take time. So if
Speaker 1: you're working on a meditation practice, if you're trying to
Speaker 1: be more mindful, if you're working to change your thoughts,
Speaker 1: if you're working to question your thoughts, if you're trying
Speaker 1: to build an exercise practice and you failed again and again,
Speaker 1: keep trying. That message is so important. We just have
Speaker 1: to keep doing these things. There are no easy answers.
Speaker 1: I wish there were. I wish there was a way
Speaker 1: to say three special sentences to you and suddenly all
Speaker 1: your troubles in life would disappear and all your negative
Speaker 1: thinking would disappear. But that's not been my experience. And
Speaker 1: believe me, I've looked high and low for those sorts
Speaker 1: of things and they don't exist. So the only real
Speaker 1: answer we have is to keep practicing these these things,
Speaker 1: do them over and over and over, and be patient
Speaker 1: on the results. But by taking these practices we will
Speaker 1: see benefit. We'll see small benefits right away and will
Speaker 1: reap larger benefits over time. But it's definitely a thing
Speaker 1: you have to keep working for, keep trying. So if
Speaker 1: you try that new communication technique with your wife tonight
Speaker 1: and it doesn't go great, don't go well, that didn't work,
Speaker 1: and and give up. I mean I've been guilty of that.
Speaker 1: Like I'm going to go home, and what I'll do
Speaker 1: is when that person gets angry with me, I'll respond
Speaker 1: with kindness. And I do that and the person still
Speaker 1: is angry with me, and I think this just doesn't work,
Speaker 1: and I give up. But I need to realize that
Speaker 1: patterns that have been put into place over years and
Speaker 1: years and years take some time to unwind. The same
Speaker 1: with thought patterns that we've been having since we were
Speaker 1: very These take some time to unwind, but it's worth doing.
Speaker 1: Keep at it, stick with it, be patient with the process.
Speaker 1: If you're looking for a little bit of guidance along
Speaker 1: the way, we have the one you Feed coaching program.
Speaker 1: You can go to one you feed dot net slash
Speaker 1: coaching to learn more about it. We'll have another episode
Speaker 1: out on Tuesday. As always, thanks for listening, Take care,
Speaker 1: talk soon. Bye.